#they are both ten years old in this btw
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ragyragd0ll ¡ 2 months ago
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Been a while since I tried out Picrew, got reminded that it existed, so I made some Amon X Dalim in it... Cause of course I did.
This image was created with Picrew’s “君の夢を見たよ“!! https://picrew.me/share?cd=EcdNJTw2Zf #Picrew #君の夢を見たよ
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maryasmorevna ¡ 1 year ago
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why are you, as an adult in 2024, still hung up on reylo. why are you still mocking the shippers. why do you believe yourself to be superior only because you dislike a stupid ship from a fucking space fairytale. girl (gnc) get a grip
#it's ridiculous. this ship is... stupidly cliché. like if you know fandoms at all#you could easily guess why people would be into it. hello?? have you tried to watch tfa without your hate-on-kyle-ron goggles?#did you watch their scenes together? you don't have to like something to recognize the hints#hell. at the time i didn't really like jonerys but i realized they were going to be a thing when i read agot in 2011#like folks. it's been nearly TEN LONG YEARS. let it go. LET IT FUCKING GOOOO#and for the lucy/cooper shippers out there who think reylos are (again) delusional when they compare the two ships:#no. *you* are being delusional only because you think reylo is unsexy and uncool (which is your right to think btw. obv)#if you can't see why someone would like both of these pairings for similar reasons... idk what to say honestly#people compared it to hannigram... honestly. again i see why they would appeal to anyone who's into both ships#i really do. but... unpopular opinion (since i'm more of a clannibal fan than i could ever be of reylo):#they are more similar to reylo than will/hannibal. there i said it#i'm not talking about the writing (admittedly the quality of it was questionable). i'm talking about tropes#never mind that imo the ghoul is more akin to vader than kylo but whatever#hannibal is an unapologetic kind of villain. he's not gonna have a redemption arc and that's okay#cooper is an antivillain who used to be a good man and became a disfigured cruel bastard. a parody of himself#lucy is him. him before the bombs dropped before he discovered the person he trusted the most wanted to commit genocide#nice. moral. polite. infused with the Good Old American Values™. he's basically her dark side#all of this is very hannigram/clannibal. i'm not denying it at all#but what'll likely happen is that lucy's actions will have a positive influence on the ghoul and remind him of what it means to be a man#and that's way more reylo-like. sorry.#beauty&thebeast/villain with some hidden good in him+morally righteous heroine/enemies to lovers etc.#i mean. hello??..... having said that. i'm not so much of a reylo shipper anymore and tbh never was. i really liked it at the time#but i was never fond of the st era. my fav characters are vader and leia and revan from the old eu. just saying#*and* it's also not impossible lucy gets darker with the ghoul as her traveling companion. in fact i wouldn't dislike it at all#if done well i mean#but i would still like for people to be intellectually honest and less puerile. god knows i have my notps#but i really don't give a fuck about the shippers. good for them i guess? i have better taste lmao but that's heavily subjective#val rambles in the tags#val speaks#txt
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serpentinesomebody ¡ 2 years ago
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I feel like when people talk about ‘supporting beginner artists’ what they actually mean is ‘supporting young beginner artists’. And I think we should remember that an adult who’s starting to draw for the first time is just as much of a beginner as a 13 year old that’s doing the same. They aren’t going to be magically better at art just because they’re older, because they are still a beginner. And that’s okay.
So yeah to all the older people who are just getting into art and feel discouraged or whatever I am cheering you on and framing your artwork in my brain museum
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mangled-by-disuse ¡ 3 months ago
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I feel like it's so easy to fall into thinking "how in the world did anyone figure this out?" partly because of the temptation to view the finished product as, you know. The Process. it's a form of irreducible complexity, where to learn to make paper, you have to have found all the steps.
but, like. maybe you make cloth, and you realise this plant sheds and felts easily if you weave from it and then wash it. maybe you cook it, to see what happens, and find it sticks together. maybe you come from a culture that already has a habit of pounding starchy foods, making them into flour, and making solids out of the runoff - soy, rice, curds. maybe you happen to think "oh what would happen if i did that?"
maybe when you're drying crops for the winter you notice that a bunch of them stick together, and that they do it more the more you pound them. you think it's cool. you try to make something that holds together. it works. you tell your mate. he tells his kid. they try it out. someone says "could we make clothes from this?" oh sure but we'll have to make it thinner.
maybe you're cooking fibres up for something else and you pass a spoon through it and the film sticks and comes off all in one piece. hey, that's neat. wonder what we could use that for?
maybe you make really shitty paper for centuries because you're using the wrong plant, or only washing it once or twice, or not pounding it fine enough. but it's interesting. people keep thinking it could be useful, but people also think it's neat. hey, we write now! wouldn't it be great if paper was smoother, whiter, flatter, easier to store? what if i try this extra step, this new ingredient?
iteration, my dudes. everything worth a damn is iterative. very few things in this world are invented in their final form. it's been millennia. people have had a cultural and political and financial incentive to iterate, sure - but also, people like to innovate. people like to play with ideas, try things that strike them as interesting. and shitty paper is still useful. making things into blocks is useful. finding that you can wet things and dry them out and change their properties is useful.
idk the answer to "how in the world did they figure [X] out" is less often "a wave of pure genius" and more often: over centuries or millennia, iteratively, through generations of better and worse products.
...except manioc root that one's still kinda baffling to me.
how do people make papers for traditional painting and calligraphy in the past by chinese artist 山白shan bai
#like there ARE things where you kind of have to figure it all out at once is my point there#like preparing fugu or manioc or anything else where doing it wrong Will Just Kill You#like the main things i'm baffled by on “how did they figure it out” are the things where the obvious answer to “is this edible” was “no”#you have to be so desperate for something to eat to be like “well this killed the last hundred people who tried but THIS TIME...”#paper is not one of those things! you can play with papery properties until paper emerges!#and then you can spend centuries making paper GOOD#this isn't like. a criticism of the previous comment#i just think it's really neat and exciting to think about how everything we use and have#is the fruit of generations upon generations#trying something. liking it. growing accustomed to it. having new thoughts about old things. iterating forever.#this is also why i love longbows (bows in general) btw it's like. we figured out the basics before we were even this species.#and THEN for thousands of years we just made little tweaks. materials. tools. skills. variations. we learn to laminate. we learn to cap.#we still do it in the 21st century. we make new string materials. we make new varnishes. fibreglass and plastic are elements now.#a paleolithic bow and a modern longbow are both just a stick with a string on it#but the modern one can pull ten times the weight and shoot faster and cleaner and neater and farther#i know this is no longer about paper i just. i have FEELINGS okay?
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angelic-waffles ¡ 4 months ago
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Haven’t been in a fandom where the characters are minors for awhile
AO3 scares me now
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dilf-docs ¡ 4 months ago
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It Always Leads To You
dbf!joel miller x younger fem!reader
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summary: it's been a year; now you're back. how can joel be so sure of those old summer feelings in your eyes when there's a new hand holding yours?
warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap, toxic relationship, cheating and infidelity themes, mutual pinning, kinda dark!joel, smut, p. in v., pussy pronouns, oral (f. receiving), fingering, manhandling, lowkey forced creampie, ANGST, the taylor swift evermore (2020) references go wild, happy ending cause y'all weak asses voted for it and i love to keep my citizens happy!
word count: 5,199 words
side note: my joel miller era is alive and breathing after this tlou re-watch i'm doing my brother swears it's for him but it's mostly me and my fic/womanly reasons, yes we love gaslight girlkeep girlbossing in here gotta say, finding inspiration for this amidst my wattpad duties and christmas movie marathon was harder than i thought lol. was it worth the wait? please like, comment and reblog to let me know! it's based on this request (they're still open btw!)
part: I / II
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Holidays linger like bad perfume.
Your eyes wander through the streets: the roads you've got to call home, the ones where you grew up. They're familiar, but so foreign, it's hard to believe they're the same ones where you scrapped your knees at ten and kissed Joel just last winter. It's as if both timelines, your life, feels more like two separate lives, miles apart.
"Hey, you okay?" tender, from the driver's seat; you're still getting used to the soft.
There's a reassuring smile your way, his hand finding yours to give it a squeeze. You notice his palm is the same size as yours. It fits perfectly, but there's a ghost of what it feels like to have it all wrapped up, looming over your itchy palm like all the yearning's a joke.
You nod. "Just tired. That's all"
He sighs. "If I wanted you to lie to me, I would've just asked"
"I'm not lying" you defend yourself as his pickup truck parks on the sidewalk.
He makes a funny face, and you laugh.
"I'm serious, Nick" your lips purse, a thing you do when you lie, yet he still hadn't noticed, like Joel. "Don't worry"
He doesn't look that convinced, so you take off your seat belt and grab his hand.
"C'mon. Mom and dad must be waiting for us"
"Hey" Nick calls you out.
"Yeah?"
"Who lives there?" and he's pointing behind you.
It's his. Joel's house.
"A friend of my dad's" you answer, dryly.
It was last december when you stood there in his porch, begging. It feels like time has stopped ever since, and you're still right where he left you.
"So will he be here?" Nick asks. "You know, since he knows your dad"
"Don't think so" you shrug, "he's got better things to do anyway. Bitter old man" comes out, with more venom than intended.
"Oh! Alright, sorry for asking"
You come back to your senses, realizing you've shared more than you should.
"No, I'm sorry. It's not that important; let's just go inside"
Your mom and dad greet you as soon as you cross the door. Last year, you'd basically fled away before New Year's, with a poor excuse and a broken heart. They both greet you as if nothing happened, although you're sure they remember your tear streamed face coming back from Joel's house, where it all ended.
As your mom corners Nick with kisses and embarrassing questions, your dad whispers to you:
"Joel asked what happened" you quirk and eyebrow, "wanted to know why you left"
"Eh, it's not important" you try to dismiss. "Definitely not as important for a guy like Joel to know"
"What is that supposed to mean?" your dad inquires. You often wonder if they knew.
"Nothing" you laugh nervously. "Listen, why don't you go and meet Nick, yeah? Did you know he likes fishing too?"
The distraction works with your dad; the same can't be said about you.
There's conversation flowing, but through the snow covered window, your eyes keep glancing back to his own. The view is dark, and you ponder if he's fled as well, the town plagued with memories too painful to reminisce.
You can still feel his hands roaming your body, the lust filled gaze that hid warmth. Every time he touches you, you have to remind you he isn't there: that the lips that kiss you, don't taste like his, that the hands that hold you, aren't big as his, and that the face that looks at you like they'll never choose another, is one you haven't learned to love yet.
Joel's memory cuts like thorns: they sink their teeth into your heart, that bleeds with that blood-colored sadness you're all too familiar with. He's poisoned you. But-- isn't it his love also the antidote for this disease he's gave you?
You abruptly stand up, plate half eaten.
"I-I need some air"
It's cold outside, but you don't care. All you want to do is sit on the porch, and drop some tears, something you can do inside too, but the fear of your muffled cries being able to be heard stops you.
You walk towards the stairs, to sit there like you do on summer days, yet there's now a difference: the snow. So you end up slipping, falling with your butt on the floor.
You yelp, embarrased although no one can see you.
"Need help?"
That you're wrong, apparently.
You don't even need to raise your view to know who that voice belongs to: you know it like a record, spinning in circles on your head.
He offers his strong hand your way, and although the cold wind hits your face, you're back to spring on the cabin: wet feet, bright sun and beating heart.
"I can get up myself" you reject his help, pushing the hand out. You keep avoiding his gaze, so you don't see how he's reacted, yet you hope he feels bad about it.
You walk up to the front door, and it takes you a while to realize he hasn't left yet. On top of that, it seems like he's following you. Just what you needed.
"What are you doing here?" you question, but your tone sounds like you're offended.
"Your folks invited me over" Joel answers, "Says they got a special guest"
"Yeah" this time, you do look back, finding him to be much closer than you thought he'd be. Yet you stand tall, defiant even. "It's my boyfriend"
You savour the way his expression falters, before the stoic façade takes over again.
"Boyfriend?" Joel scoffs, as if you just told the funniest joke ever.
"Is that supposed to be funny?" you bite back. "What? Think a pretty girl can't get a new man?"
"Never said I'd doubt'it" he clicks his tongue. "Y'a could get any man you'd want, sugar"
Ironically, the only man you want stands before you.
"Right" you chuckle dryly, "I think it's kind of funny of you to say that"
Joel's eyes bore into yours, a clash of emotions circling in his chocolate orbs.
"Y/n-"
"Don't" you stop him. Then sigh, defeated. "Let's just go inside"
As soon as you both arrive on the dinning room, your parents both greet Joel. Then, they introduce him to their guest, just as promised.
"Joel, this is Nick, y/n's boyfriend" your father speaks. "Nick, this is Joel, a dear old friend of mine"
Nick, as the gentleman he is, offers his hand. Joel accepts, but you can see the barely desguised displease behind his eyes.
"Wow, strong grip" Nick comments before joking, "you can let go now, I'm not going anywhere"
The hidden meaning of his words, whether intentional or not, hit Joel in the face. It's obvious by the way he backtracks, letting go of Nick's hand.
As you sit again, Nick leans to your side and whispers.
"Is this the guy who lives in the house across the street?" you nod. "Thought you'd said he had better plans. But, see? I told you: no plan's more important than coming to your house"
He's always making jokes, trying to make you smile, but it's done the opposite now. The food has gone cold long ago, yet you cut through the meat with a violence so palpable, even your mom tells you to slow down.
The nerve of Joel, showing up to your house like it's nothing, talking to you like he's unaware of his spell on you, acting like Nick is some sort of competition when he pulled out of the race himself a winter ago.
"So, Nick. How did you two meet?" your mom adresses him, eager to know details.
"It was at a party, actually, through mutual friends. Not a very spectacular story, that I know. What's funny is, she asked me what hour it was. And what did I say?"
"He didn't answer my question. Instead, he said: For you, I'm available any hour" you answer.
Your parents laugh, but Joel remains quiet. You wonder what he's thinking.
"You know" looking at Nick while cutting the steamed vegetables a little too agressive, "y/n actually hates parties"
"Joel" you warn through gritted teeth.
"Really? I didn't know that!" Nick seems so genuine, Joel can't help but hate him. He looks at you, concerned "You didn't tell me"
You can't believe he would rat you out like that. The appropiate word isn't hate, and you don't know how to describe it, but parties aren't really your environment; if you can, you'd choose to be anywhere else.
He'll pay for that.
"Joel" you seethe, an ugly smile painted in your features, "did you know Nick knows how to fish?"
It's a direct jab at him. He feels stupid for letting you get to him. The inferiority complex towards some random guy he just met, years younger, is actually laughable.
"I like-" Nick wants to add on that.
"Well" Joel interrupts, looking at you. "You never taught me like ya' were s'pposed to"
"You never cared to learn" you reply, acidic.
He sips his drink, trying to hide the smirk that's formed on his lips. You can't shut up, and he loves you've stayed the same.
"That means I've got some classes to take" Joel leans back on his chair, relaxed like he's won this round. "Just tell me when"
The tension cuts like the storm that's just formed outside.
"You should stay over, Joel" your dad offers when he takes a peak at the climate, "it's too dangerous outside"
Joel seems indestructible, like not even a snow blizzard could pierce through the rough old man. But he agrees, much to your dismay.
It's probably midnight already, and all you've done is toss around the bed. Nick peacefully snores next to you, and you envy how easily he falls asleep. You've always find it hard to sleep, the nighttime plagued with too many loud thoughts that fill the silence.
You get up carefully, heading downstairs for some water. You sip with tranquility when a noise jolts you from your sit.
The wooden floor creaks, making you aware you're not alone anymore.
"Can't sleep?"
You don't answer, seeing his sturdy figure emerge from the shadows until the dim moonlight shines over his aging features. Silence settles in. Outside, the wind howls, bumping against the windows with violence, like your heart does now against your chest.
"Not much of a talker, are you?"
"There's nothing to talk" cuts your response through the thick tension, the air suddenly suffocating.
You take another sip, but the tremble of your hand doesn't go unnoticed by Miller.
"Right" Joel sits next to you, on the kitchen island. "Won't even look at me, sugar? You've got eyes" his voice drops, "use 'em"
"What are you doing, Joel?" you ask looking at him, tears threatening to spill, making your bright eyes shimmer with pain.
He gets up abruptly, like he's woken up from a trance. He's seen his own pain on your eyes, and he hates it.
"Joel?" you ask again, demanding but softly.
He can't answer. Instead, he leaves.
"Goodnight, y/n" voice raw, many emotions boiling, hidden on the inside. It hurts.
If you hadn't changed, Joel too stayed the same.
A goddamn coward.
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Two days have passed since, and now it's Christmas Eve.
You kneel, putting the presents under the tree. Normally, your parents would have much more people around for the holidays, but thanks to the storm, it's just them, Nick, Joel and you.
"I'm gonna miss Mrs. Stone's cookies" you pout, "I wish she could be here"
"It's a big loss for tonight" your dad sighs. "Next time, yeah? Christmas will come again faster than you think"
You nod, still absent as he walks away.
"Hey" Joel pops up behind, seemingly from nowhere.
"Hey" you reply, voice laced with tiredness just at the sight of him. How will you manage to survive until New Year's? You have no idea, the task harder if he's staying in the same house as you are.
"Put this in there, will ya'?"
He hands you a box, neatly wrapped up. What stands out the most is the silver bow on top. Your stomach drops: it's your favorite color.
"Y-yeah" you stammer. When the present falls in your hands, you notice it looks like Joel did it himself.
"Didn't know you were capable of nice things" you whisper. There's no anger in your voice, only loss.
"I'm trying" is what he says, before leaving you alone. Until then, you realize he had been touching you, the skin where his hand was on your shoulder burning.
Dinner goes by swiftly, conversation flowing easily courtesy of Nick and your father, who both have in common the love for talking. It may be your brain messing with you, but his eyes never leave you, fixated on your every move, savoring when your lips open and take a bite; when you lick them afterwards, salt in your mouth he'd love to take off in a movement of his tongue. The ghost of your lips haunts him, cruelly playing with his yearning now that he's got you across the table. It's a few centimeters, really, but it feels like you're miles away: and it's his fault. You're no longer his, and he's reminded of it every time your boyfriend kisses what he once had.
Now it's time to open the presents, and you excitedly raise your hand to go first.
"Alright, sweetheart. You know I can't deny you anything" your father beams, "go ahead. Choose any present you'd like to open first"
Joel's eyes are on you, and you know he's desperately waiting for you to open his first. Maybe partly in courage, maybe partly in fear, but you choose Nick's first: something safe to start with.
"That's mine!" he chirps, and Joel mockingly imitates his kid-like joy under his breath.
You unwrap the present, finding a small box inside.
"Please, don't be another box" you joke, and he laughs.
"You think that low of me? Please"
You keep unwrapping and find a bag. The bag has a small tag that reads: Gotcha.
"Nick! God, you're so corny" you tease as you open the bag. Inside, there's a velvet box, and by the looks of it, you can tell it's jewelry. You gasp, pulling out a silver charm tied to a silver thin chain: it's a marlin fish. "Nick..."
"I know. Marlin isn't your favorite fish, but that's all I could find" you get up, wrapping him on a tight hug. Aware you've got an audience, he leans and whispers "I knew fishing was special to you, because of your dad and childhood. Maybe now" he takes it from your hands, carefully putting it around your neck, "it can also be our special thing"
Joel sees the scene unfold in front of him, his grip tight on the cloth of his jeans until it's white. His jaw clenches at the affection display; all he sees is red.
"What about that one?" your mom points out Joel's present. A pit of nerves forms in your stomach. "I don't remember seeing it there"
Before you can grab it, your dad moves faster, examining the box on his hands.
"It's Joel's" he makes a pause, "for y/n"
You pretend to be shocked, and you can tell Nick tenses at your side.
"You didn't tell me you were close"
"Used to" you correct quickly, despite the knot on your throat. "Not anymore"
"He still got you a present, though"
You don't get to answer because your dad leaves the box on your lap.
"Open it" it's soft but feels threathing for some reason, "I'm curious"
Joel's resting hands tremble as much as yours while you open the present. You reveal the simple white box under the wrap, opening it up.
Your voice comes out shaky as you call his name. And he can see it: the muffled laughters on the shed, the warmth of the cabin's fire, the fogged up windows of his car, the bruises on your tits and that voice, so vulnerable, he can see you on his porch, saying those three words that terrified him so much, his solution was breaking your heart.
"What is it?" your dad asks.
"It's a scarf" the fabric tickles your fingers that wander through the loose strands.
You remember it all too well.
"Oh, it's vintage!" your mom comments when she sees the worn-out aspect.
But just as your affair with Joel, you keep the secret of it's real owner.
"It's perfect" you mutter, remembering better times: ones where he'd wrap the scarf colored as the leaves on the ground around your neck, covering bruises he'd just made while you joked you'd steal it, and Joel would say he'd just let you, that it looked better on you anyway.
You've forgotten the good, so used to thinking of Joel at your worst, like a punishment to endure and sink your shipwreck even deeper. You felt lost, replaying memories that seemed stuck on a loop. Since last december, all you've known is pain; creeping up through the cracks in your fleeting happiness, one you've tried to find to no avail. One day, past the curses and cries, maybe there'll be happiness. But as for now, that day seems terribly far.
As he sees your teary gaze, Joel often wonders were it went wrong. When did hurt was all you had for him in that gaze of yours he can't bare to look that long, not before he's reliving all those seasons by your side, replaying his footsteps on the snow, grass, water and fallen leaves, trying to find the one where it all went wrong. The torture he now wears like a second skin, his agony painted words addressed to the fire of a house that feels so empty and alone.
"We should continue" your dad speaks over the silence, "there are still many presents left"
The night moves slowly, and the scarf you've chosen to wear is now suffocating around your neck. But you can't take it off. This is the closest you've been to Joel on a year; it still smells like him. As the presents run out, you excuse yourself early to bed, only to wake up again in the middle of the night. You want to pee, so you exit your room and walk to the bathroom, your bare feet against the cold wood sending shivers down your spine that only seem to augment when you walk past his door, next to the bathroom. After being done, you splash some water on your face, as if that would make some sense get to you.
"What are you doing?" you ask yourself in the mirror. Your tired reflection stares back at you, in silence.
You open the door, ready to go back to bed when a hand covers your mouth and shoves you inside.
"Don't scream" your cries go muffled against his hand, the calloused digits pressing against your soft skin, "wanna wake 'em up?"
You shake your head, so he lets your mouth free.
"Joel" you call out, but he's facing the door, his back all you see. No sound can be heard, aside from his uneven breaths.
"I'm sorry" he says, and then you hear the small click of the door's lock.
"What the hell?"
This time, he faces you, but his movements are so quick you don't register his lips on yours until it's too late. He kisses you like a starved man who hasn't had a meal in years, eating you out while your body acts up on it's own, the urgency embarrasing even.
"No" you pull back. Your mind screams in guilt at how much you want this, and that's all you can hear aside from his ragged breaths.
"No?"
"It isn't fair"
"To lover boy out there?" he teases, "I know he ain't treating you right, or ya' wouldn't look me the way ya' do"
"Don't, Joel" your tone is icy, "Nick treats me better than you ever could"
He laughs, darkly. "You know I ain't meant that" he corners you against the sink, the material cold against your bare legs; you don't sleep with nothing but an oversized t-shirt, despite the weather.
"Riddle me this, sugar: if he treats you so well, why are you so fucking wet?"
Your heart beats so fast you fear you'll die. He gets closer, his hot breathe prickling against your ear.
"It takes a man to please a woman" he tucks a loose strand behind your ear, "and I ain't leaving my baby displeased"
His fingers pull down the panties until your clit is exposed.
"Look at 'er" he traces a teasing finger over the puffy skin, coated on your slick "missed me, didn't she? Gonna treat 'er so good, she won't ever feel lonely again"
He softly kisses your neck, the trepidation and regret tying your stomach in knots.
Joel teases your needy core with his finger.
"Tell you somethin', sugar" Joel finds it hard to hide his adoration, "I missed 'er too"
He stares into your eyes while pushing two rough fingers inside your cunt. You bite your lip, holding back your moans.
"Need summ help?" he kisses you roughly, smirking when he feels your shaky breath against his lips. He pushes them in and out faster, making your walls squeeze tightly around his fingers.
"Did he ever have you comin' this fast? I'ont think so" he whispers against your neck. You whisper his name through labored breaths, making a smug smile adorn his features. "Good girl"
He proceeds to kneel down, despite the creak of his bones. You see him leave a trail of kisses down your thighs, your legs opening wider in response. His tongue gives rapid flickers against your sensitive bud, aware of the lack of time. He slurps the pulsing cunt, his head moving back and forth while he sucks, coating his moustache on your juices. Joel goes back to the quick movements, tongue knowing your spots and twisting fingers as aid, causing your back to arch.
"Fuck" you curse as you come, gripping the sink a bit too tight.
Joel then pulls away and places his fingers coated in your arousal in his mouth and licks them. He sees the obscene display in the fogged mirror, satisfied.
"Goodnight, sugar" Joel bids goodbye like it's nothing, kissing your lips that taste like you. "Still as sweet as ever"
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It's New Year's Eve.
"You're leaving?" you sound so sad, Joel can't help but scoff. In the end, he'd stayed long after the storm had passed, your father arguing holidays weren't meant to be spent alone. So he stayed.
And now, Nick is leaving.
"I'm sorry" he apologizes for the millionth time, "but granny is sick. I don't know if she'll make it another year, so say the doctors. I would love to stay, really, but I have to be with her"
You understand, having lost your grandad years ago. But that doesn't mean you're okay with it: Nick leaving means a clear path for Joel, who didn't stop with him sleeping next room, and certainly won't now, despite not having interacted with you since he ate you out on the bathroom.
He pulls you into a long hug and a kiss that doesn't feel the same anymore. "Will you be okay?"
"Yeah" you nod, "I'll miss you though"
"Well, I'll be all yours when you get back"
You smile but it doesn't reach your eyes.
"See you, y/n. I love you"
Your lips purse after you utter those three words back.
Later at night, the house is filled with guests. The lively environment is restored, and you feel less confined to Joel's claws, so many faces to speak and distract yourself with, compared to Christmas and the past couple of days. You clutch the marlin charm tightly, mind busy wandering to places it shouldn't. Joel stares at you from across the room, eyes trained on you as he sips his drink calmly, like he's won; you don't know why he's keeping score if he already knows it. You wander off to the kitchen, and Joel follows you.
"You have to stop" you speak as soon as he enters, aware he would follow you.
"I ain't do shit"
You turn around, facing him. "Bullshit, Joel"
"Tell me, what'd I do?" he comes closer, and despite your erratic heart and fear, you stay still; challenging.
"You did this, Joel" his expression falters for a second, the weight of last december's crimes dawning on him. "Don't try to make me feel guilty"
"I ain't. That wasn't your fault" he sighs, breath dragging long like a cigarrette. "But this" he motions with his hands the reduced distance, "this it is"
Your breath hitches.
"We can't keep doing this, Joel. Nick doesn't deserve it"
He pins you against the counter with force, gripping the skin of your wrists until you're sure you'll get a bruise. Joel's eyes darken at the thought of your frail and soft body under his rough figure and belly, his strength and your weakness making the job of putting you under his will, so much easier.
"Don't say his name" he whispers, his breath laced with alcohol, "he ain't here anymore. Ain't nothing to stop me now, right, sugar?" Joel purrs as he steps towards you, taking your face in his hands before starting a heated kiss, making you stumble.
This was so wrong, but it felt so right, the missing pieces falling like dominoes.
He was your pain divine: you needed his hurt to bleed and feel alive again. Maybe the red of the blood and the blue of your sadness could paint your darkest grey skies with a happiness you've craved since you lost him.
"Tell me to stop" Joel whispers, tempting like a devil as he kisses down your neck, littering it with hickeys.
"Don't"
Next thing you know, you're excusing yourself upstairs and then Joel goes missing too, both inside of your bedroom.
Your dress was the first thing to go.
"Wear it for me?" you're about to answer, lips pursing, but he cuts you off, "and don't lie, sugar. Don't get too used to the bad girl schtick"
"I only wore this dress so you could take it off"
He kisses you desperately, legs wrapped around his waist while he carries you to bed, and the memories of your first flood you as he drops you down to your back, watching the way you bounce. He has you just like he wanted: moaning his name while he leaves tender kisses on the soft bare flesh.
"Joel-" you gasp. Despite the chatter downstairs and music, you try to remain low as he wraps his lips around your nipples. He then moves to your breasts, covering them with his kisses and hickeys. He hadn't touched a woman ever since you left, the feeling of the rosy innocent skin on his rough teeth making him loose all common sense, the real thing even better than what he would try to conjure when he fucked himself in the bathroom at the memory of you.
He groans when he feels your hands roaming over his back, nails digging on the scarred skin.
"Someone's eager" he teases, seeing your damp underwear. "Is this 'cause of me?" you don't answer, too busy removing the cloth, only for his strong fingers to grab you and stop you. "Don't be shy, answer baby. We got a whole new year, yeah?"
"I need you Joel" you whine, not laughing at the joke "cut the crap"
He pushes you gently back down to the bed. "So needy sugar, want me to help ya'?"
You eagerly nod, making him laugh. But there's no mock, only love behind the sound.
"Will you let this old man take care of ya', pretty baby? Just use your words, and I'll be all y'rs"
"Do it, Joel. Just do it"
You gasp as your folds begin to be prodded open by the fat head of Joel's cock. You curse, feeling him push in just the tip, the sweet burn of your walls welcoming his size making you grab his arms that stand at the sides of your body, caging you in.
His tummy pushes against your stomach as he adjusts himself, his weight sinking your body on the creaking matress.
"'S just the tip, ready for the whole thing?"
You needed him, all of him.
"Yes, Joel. I want you" You say and he pushes in slowly, feeling his cock fill up every empty space that craved for him.
You squeeze your eyes shut as his hips roll back pulling out about halfway before rocking back in. His sloppy thrusts pick up a familiar pace that makes you moan and beg for more, head falling against the sheets as his pace speds up until he's fucking you senseless.
Joel's brain goes blank at the sight of you creaming on his dick and the obscene sounds leaving your pretty mouth. Did he really give this up? He'd definitely go back in time and slap the fuck out of his past self, because there is simply nothing better than having you under him, screaming his name like that's all you can ever say.
"Does he fuck you like this, huh?" Joel angles his hips, resuming his brutal pace. Your body jolts with each snap. "Is he enough for you?"
"Yes" his stomach drops, dark eyes now hesitant, "but he isn't you"
He pushes himself back in, your eyes fluttering shut almost immediately.
"Tell me you'll leave him, y/n. Look me in the eyes and tell me who ya' really belong to"
Your eyes snap open at the possesiveness clashed with jealousy that drips from his sweat-soaked lips.
The confession falls easily, as meant to be. "Yours, Joel. Always was and will be"
He could cum just at the sight of your loving doe eyes.
Downstairs, the countdown begins, but in your room, all you can hear are his soft groans and your pathetic whimpers, and if the people would stop shouting, you could probably hear the squelch of your dripping cunt sucking in his girth with each thrust.
After a few more erratic thrusts, you feel his warm cum fill you up. Joel was always obsessed with how his cum seeped out of you and around his cock. Without thinking, his rough fingers push deep in you, making you yelp as he makes sure he isn't wasting a drop behind.
The countdown ends, and fireworks erupt outside as your head rests on the crook of his sweat covered neck.
"I love ya', sugar" those words you thought you imagined that one time, now real, so goddamn real his voice quivers and eyes get tearful with grief, "'S okay if ya' don't say it. I just wanted you to hear 'em. 'M just tired of wastin' my time"
He wraps your lips with his with tenderness you had only dreamed of. There is still a lot to talk and heal, but this time, his arms hold you like a promise. And you let yourself believe it.
Y/n's New Years' purposes: 1. Break up with Nick 2. Try to explain this seasonal mess to mom and dad 3. At last, try to be happy
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cr: divider by @kodaswrld / gif @tomshiddles
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cosmic-dust-poltergeist ¡ 1 month ago
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Au where Tim Drake as a civilian and Danny in human form get kidnapped. It's irrelevant on who, just that whoever it is just saw 2 kids that are probably Bruce Wayne's and took their chances to get a ransom. Both teens are tied to metal chairs that are hooked up to some sort of machine.
Villain, recording a video to send to show they mean business: And for every hour you don't send the money, I'll hurt them
Tim: Can't I just wire you the ransom? I have the money And have plans for tonight that didn't involve this bullshit
Danny: I don't have either of those things, but I wanted to nap before going to my second job
Tim, twisting as much as he can to look at Danny: Second job? How old are you? Shouldn't you be in school?
Danny, shrugs: high school doesn't pay the bills and I rather live in my shady apartment than the streets
Tim: Dude-
Villain, jabbing a button on the machine: ENOUGH!
A short, but powerful electric shock is sent through the boys and they have very different, but similarly intense reactions. Tim yelps before breaking into Joker-like unhinged laughter that just won't stop. Danny screams bloody murder for the entire time of the shock and becoming catatonic once it stops. The villain is completely spooked by these responses, but figures it's a good ending for their ransom video and sends it off. Less than fifteen minutes later, Batman breaks into the building and beats the villain unconscious while a freaked out Robin disables the machine and unties the teens.
Damian: Dr-Drake?
Tim, still chocking on laughter and fumbling with the emergency medications he keeps on his person because of things like this: It's- HA It's fine- HA HA HA It happens some- HA HA- Sometimes when-when-HA HA- I'm Sh-shocked-HA HA HA- How's the-HA-the kid?
Damian: I don't know. He's unresponsive and I'm not sure if I should touch him... His eyes are glowing green..
Tim, shakily moves to see: Oh! HA HA Guess he-HA- he's coming with us-HA HA HA- he's coming with us now- HA
Danny, clearly not all there, starts mumbling: I'm not dead. I'm not dead. I'm alive. I'm not dead. I'm not dead. I'm not a monster. I'm alive. I'm still Danny. I'm not dead. I'm still Danny. I'm not dead.
Tim, slowly gaining control of his laughter: That's concerning Hehe
Damian: Indeed. I shall inform the others to expect a guest
Tim, nods before getting within arms reach of Danny: Danny-hehehe- Danny can you hear me? Hehe
Danny, snaps his jaw shut with a loud click when his name is said and awareness starts bleeding in: Wh-What?
Tim: We're hehe no electric shock budies hehe
Danny's bright glowing eyes lock onto Tim's still painfully smiling face before tugging up his left sleeve to show off his slightly glowing scarring: Electrocution sucks. Have some major ptsd dealing with it...
Tim: God, me too. Heh Electroshock therapy with the Joker is a zero out of ten, would not recommend heh
Danny, making a face: ew, clowns
Tim: HA Mood!
Batman, approaching from an angle that both the teens can see him coming: Do you have any family I can drop you with?
Danny: eeh... no? I got disowned by my parents last year and my sister hasn't moved out and started college just yet, but it's fine, I'll be fine, I was just telling... I just realized I don't know your name
Tim: Tim, Tim Drake
Danny: Oh! You're that teen CEO! No wonder they kidnapped you. I'm guessing my shitty luck is why I got snatched too
Tim: And you look like you could be one of my adopted siblings. What's your name btw?
Danny: Danny... Just Danny
Tim, stares Bruce down while clearly addressing Danny: How would you like to be a Drake or Wayne or both? We're trauma buddies now.
Danny, looking between Tim and Bruce: Uuh? What?
Tim starts grinning as Bruce looks defeated: B adopts every sad orphan with blue eyes or black hair, do you happen to be a vigilante? He speed runs the adoption process with the vigilante types
Danny, wide eyes: Uuuuh, I mean, I used to be something like that in my hometown??? I'm technically retired so I can keep a roof over my head???
Tim's grin is even wider: Cool, I'm Red Robin
Batman: TIM!!
Tim, ignores him: How old are you?
Danny: I turn 17 next month?
Tim, nods and turns to Batman: I'm pulling a you. He's mine now. Danny, you're a Drake now. Clown hating, electricity trauma bonded teen vigilantes got to stick together.
Robin: Father, I believe Drake is having a manic episode
Tim: Shut your mouth, demon brat. I forcefully adopted Bruce and Jason, I can forcefully adopt a little brother if I want.
Danny, looking intrigued, but also so done with the day: Do I get a say?
Tim, beaming: No. Now, do you have any food restrictions?
Tim manically babbles to Danny, pulling more and more of his shitty life out of him while Batman shepherds them to the batmoble. Danny never makes it to either of his jobs again and what little belongings he still has are moved to the manor within a week. He has a new identity and reenroled in school by the end of the month. It takes a while for him to reveal his ghost half, even with Duke being flashbanged everytime they're in the same room. That being said, he only goes out as a vigilante when it's an all hands on deck situation or a random ghost shows up, instead he focuses more on his studies and being the mad scientist making the batfam's gear, since he never planned to be a vigilante to begin with. Everyone is surprised when he's introduced to Kon, like they knew he'd be starry eyed over meeting an alien, but he's also excited to meet a clone and babbles about his clone(s(if Dan counts)). Said clone(s) are then given a standing invite to stay, Dani eventually agrees. Tim and Danny joke about being twins often since they're close in age and have similar habits and triggers, while Dani forcibly claims Damian as her twin despite being opposites in everything, but their gremlin energy. Jason is delighted by having death joke buddies and Dick is ecstatic to have someone to pun with. The more level headed members appreciate anytime Jazz is there to reel in her little siblings, and she turns down adoption when asked, not that it stops the batfam from considering her family.
Danny, at some point: Y'all're fruitloops, but you're my fruitloops.
Vlad is also blacklisted from all Wayne events and the Fenton Parents and GIW are chased out of town anytime they set foot there. All three suffer from financial ruin because the batfam is petty and protective of their own. The Ecto Acts don't stand a chance.
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keeganns ¡ 26 days ago
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important (out of order) info from the afterparty for anyone that missed it:
-they’re probably gonna rebrand dnpg to just dan and phil and move away from just doing gaming content (although they did say they’re down to keep the blue/purple colour scheme)
-they retold the story ab phil breaking his rib, apparently it’s bc the boxing was originally supposed to alternate between them winning but the dan winning ending had a move where Phil had to throw dan over his head and during practice phil accidentally threw the fight choreographer’s entire body weight into his own rib and broke it lmao
-one conspiracy they didn’t use was darry (dan x harry styles) bc they thought it was weird to talk about harry styles on stage every night and wanted to keep it to just being about them. they also apparently had a whiteboard full of conspiracies for the show
-craziest m&g experience was someone who told them they were pregnant during tatinof and then their ten year old child came around the corner “like a jumpscare” (dan’s words)
-they did really really try to tour in as many places as they could but had various legal/visa issues and said that if they do another tour they will keep fighting to perform in as many places as they can
-dan spray dyed Phil’s hair blue!! huge
-phil put the father philip coat (?) on wrong during the tit video and they didn’t realize until they were watching it on the livestream
-they said they do plan to put the tit song on Spotify also huge!!! they also tier ranked all of their show songs and dan said the introverts song wasn’t camp (disagree heavy btw) and said that they’d think about releasing it as a music video
-sister daniel was wearing nude underwear and apparently the first underwear dan bought was from a gay p0rn website and had a giant fake bulge in it and he flashed multiple people in rehearsals so they fixed it
-Phil’s silicone muscle suit was also from a p0rn website and it initially came in a size too big so it was gigantic and he had to email to ask for a size down, and when he tried to put the new one on his face got stuck in it so he asked the wardrobe people to cut the back open and make it a corset
-they praised the Australians who were watching at 6am on a Monday lol
-they also praised pj and Sophie for their incredible craftsmanship as they should!!
-they addressed “wt md if” and said they have no idea what it is and that it almost made it into phan twitter 5 but they thought it would take too much explanation
-tit song started as dan sending the melody and lyrics to ben with a voice memo recorded at 3 am
-slight tease for a phil book??? maybe??? he said he’d like to
-dan addressed dystopia daily and said she was a little too niche and he was shocked how well it did for how niche and post-ironic it is, and phil said he was scared to come on bc dan didn’t tell him anything about it beforehand
-they do plan to release the tit merch but it takes a while to get it all together! dan said a few weeks at the earliest
-other possible names for tit were “dan and phil vs the world” again and “all or nothing,” which was phil’s suggestion apparently but they decided against it bc it was too gaming-channel exclusive
-both of them said the hardest part of tit was the choreography of the song, phil especially said he had a really hard time with it
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saeun ¡ 5 months ago
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ꪆ୧ ── REAP WHAT YOU SOW ┊ LOVE TO LOSE ﹑ JJK. ⤿ starring: gojo satoru x fem!reader.
꒰ heart to none ﹢ if only he knew karma would come back to bite his ass a few years later. now he misses his ex while she's moved on.
��� · love, ‘su: nothing much!! just moments of him suffering
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co-parenting with satoru truly isn't all butterflies. as reserved and respectful as he is (to a selected few), satoru never hesitated to taunt you whenever you mentioned going on dates.
“a date? hmm, good luck with that.”
“if it happens to kick off, good for you, but i don't want him near my child.”
“how exciting! i hope it fails.”
those are just some examples of his behaviour. he's vocal about disliking you and the idea of sharing you. had he known beforehand he'd become slightly possessive, he would've avoided you and relationships altogether.
loving someone his mind hates but his heart longs for isn't an experience he'd wish upon his worst enemy — it's too much. the wretched feeling in his chest deepens whenever he's with the kid; scenarios of you being beside him at that very moment flashes before his eyes, but his pride's too high to crash whatever you're doing.
that doesn't stop him from texting, however. he never had an issue with double—triple texting you. if he had something to say (which is never anything important), he'll say it.
satoru: hey.
satoru: did you forget you have a family at home?
satoru: my child's asleep btw, we had fun all day.
you: my* child. not yours.
satoru: so what am i, an elf on babysitting duties?
you: sure if that's what you want. now stop texting my phone.
satoru: what if i'm dying?
you: i'd pop some champagne. throw something on the grill. light up a cigarette, even.
satoru: you don't even like cigarettes.
you: exactly. now bye i'll be there for six.
yeah, there's no doubt that you'll never entertain him again. he, too, wouldn't entertain himself if he was in your position. sure, he was an ass in the relationship but— you're both older and wiser. maybe you can put the differences aside and come together? a flat no is what you'd answer.
satoru doesn't even hear from you often; most of your activity reports come from your child who excitedly tells their father the details, wishing he was there.
“you guys had fun. i wish i was there too, bub.”
a sentimental tone settled in his voice. he's suffering the consequences of his actions, and he desperately needs you to help him through it.
just like old times: you'd be there for him, going along with whatever he needed to calm down. whether it's wanting to be in you or on you— as long as your arms were wrapped around him.
but it's all a memory now. a bitter one.
do you show your vulnerable side to the guys you date, too? do you hold them the way you held him? do they even know what you like? do they know you the way he knows you?
jealousy, regret, longing— everything mixes in his mind. his stomach aches. it feels as though his insides are hollow.
he adores your child. they look mostly like him, but the personality stems from you. the attitude, tantrums, even the way they hold things — it's all you. he guesses the kid's observed you and eventually picked up your habits. satoru relates; after all, he still has some of your habits he picked up.
as the clock ticks on, his fingers hover over the keyboard on his phone. somehow, he found himself in your pinned chat— debating whether he should text or not. he's been typing and deleting for the past ten minutes. unless you're not on the app, there's no way you didn't notice the ‘typing...’ under his contact name.
satoru: i've been thinking.
(message deleted)
satoru: fuck your date let's get back together.
(message deleted)
satoru: or whatever you're doing right now. let me apologize — it's been years. our baby's four now.
(message deleted)
satoru: hey.
you: what's with these deleted messages?
you: are you okay?
he wonders. is he okay? would you come over if he said no? are you going to be mad if he re-sent what the deleted messages said?
satoru: uhhh yeah. everything's fine.
satoru: i'm bored that's why.
satoru: you should totally come over.
you: no.
you: talk to you later.
satoru: please? i'm serious.
you: fine.
satoru: might as well spend the night.
(message deleted)
satoru: thanks.
(message delivered)
“well fuck...” he sighs, raking his fingers through his hair. he doesn't have anything to say nor do with you. actually, he does — he has quite a few, but he wouldn't push your buttons. he'd love to, but the chances of him receiving a slap is high.
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fairy-writes ¡ 5 months ago
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Hello- umm I'm new here and I saw your request was open..I was wondering if it's ok for me to request maybe some parent headcanons for Soshiro Hoshina,like imagine him and his s/o (the reader) having twin sons that are literal prodigy and just a overall very talented kids.I just wanna see their dynamic as a family,Like badass husband and their badass wife/husband/partner and their literal gifted prodigy twins- YOU CAN FEEL FREE TO IGNORE THIS BTW NO PRESSURE THANK YOUUU🏃🏻‍♀️💨
YOUNG PRODIGIES
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Reblogs and Comments are greatly appreciated!!
__________________________________________________________________________
Fandom(s): Kaiju No. 8
Pairing(s): Hoshina Soshiro x Reader
Word Count: 0.8k
Genre(s)/Tag(s): Gender Neutral!Reader, Headcanons, Original Child Characters, 
Notes: The names I picked and their meanings are as follows (pls lmk if I got any meanings wrong, I’m using a website to translate said names)
Katsuo: Victory and/or hero
Osamu: discipline/study
__________________________________________________________________________
Okay, so at this point, you and Soshiro have likely retired from the Defense Force. Like, yes, you love your job and can go for several more years, but once you decide to have kids, he wants to be there for them and raise them properly. You do, too. 
Whether you guys decide adoption, pregnancy, or surrogacy is right for you, it doesn't matter. He’s there for it all. 
You both end up with twin boys! Katsuo is the younger twin, and Osamu is the elder twin by seven minutes.
When the boys are six years old, Soshiro decides to start teaching them the ways of the sword. 
And you really shouldn’t have been surprised to see that they are prodigies. 
Like, it takes some time for their skills to show, but when they do, they’re top of the class. 
They spar with Soshiro to practice, and of course, he goes easy on them for the first little (long) while. 
While both of them are prodigies, they excel in different ways. Osamu in the offensive, Katsuo in the defensive. 
But that doesn’t mean that they don’t feel inadequate at times…
Osamu and Soshiro came in from practicing for the day while you were busy filling out the last of the paperwork from your new desk job. It was more so to keep you from getting bored than anything else. The Defense Force paid you a hefty pension for serving for so long in their ranks. 
“Where’s Katsuo?” You lean back in your desk chair and ask your beloved husband and elder son as Osamu skips in to ask what’s for dinner. 
“He isn’t with you?” Soshiro asks as he toes off his shoes by the front door. 
At this, you frown. “No? I thought he was with you.” 
“He said he didn’t wanna practice today.” Osamu chirps as he comes out of the kitchen with an apple stuffed in his mouth. 
Katsuo didn’t want to practice? That was odd…
“Go check out back again. I’ll check his bedroom.” You eventually say to Soshiro, who nods and takes your elder son with him. 
You find Katsuo in his bedroom.
He’s curled under his alien-themed blankets, and you can faintly hear sniffling from your spot by the door. 
“Hey, kiddo.” You whisper into the silence, and he jolts in surprise. He peeks his head out from under the blankets to look at you with red-rimmed eyes. 
“What do you want?” He mumbles, and your eyebrow arches at the ten-year-old’s cold response. 
“To check on you. What’s going on?” You say, but don’t move from your spot by the door until he gives you the go-ahead. 
Once you’re seated beside your younger son, he bursts into tears. 
“I’m not good enough!” He blubbers, and your frown deepens. 
“What do you mean? Of course, you are!” He flinches away from your comforting hand and shakes his head. 
“Not as good as ‘samu! He’s loads better than me! He beat me four times yesterday, and I only beat him once!” He snaps, and you sigh. 
You should’ve known this was going to happen. 
“You’re too much like me, I fear.” You eventually say, and he looks at you in confusion. 
“Huh?” You reach forward again, and he allows you to run your fingers through his hair. 
“You know, especially when I was your age, I always beat myself up over things I couldn’t do or couldn’t do well. Growing up with your father will do that to you. But you know what?” You poked at his side until he began to giggle and squirm away. 
“What?” 
“I pulled myself up and tried my best. I was good at what I did, and I knew that. I just forgot it sometimes.” 
Katsuo looked at you in what looked like awe, wiping his tears away as he crawled into your side. You wrapped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him into a hug. 
“But you’re amazing!” He whispered, and you laughed, 
“I know. But so are you, my little man.” You said, and before he could deflect, you continued. 
“I haven’t seen anyone as good with defensive footwork as you in a long time. And you should be proud of that! Sure, Osamu is good on the offensive, but when he gets backed into a corner, he doesn’t know what to do. He’ll get better, I’m sure. But so will you.” You reminded him, and he just shrugged.
“Am I interrupting?” Came your husband’s voice and you looked up to him with a smile as he approached the two of you. Katsuo scrambled from your grip and threw his scrawny arms around his father. 
“I’m sorry for missing practice today.” He mumbled into his stomach and Soshiro just chuckled and ruffled his son’s hair. 
“Don’t worry about it, buddy. There’s always tomorrow.” He said and ushered him out of the room before sitting beside you. 
“So, what was his issue today?” He asked, and you leaned your head on his shoulder. 
“He thought he wasn’t good enough. We had a little chat, and he’s feeling a bit better now.” You replied and felt him kiss your hairline. 
“You always were good with pep talks.” He teased, and you just rolled your eyes, but a smile nonetheless played at your lips. 
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bones4thecats ¡ 1 year ago
Text
Basic Headcanons Of Life With Their S/O
Type of Writing: #8 - Poll Result Characters: Kazutora Hanemiya, Keisuke Baji, Haruchiyo Sanzu, and Tetta Kisaki Name: Basic Headcanons Of Life With Their S/O Original Poll Link: Here
A/N: This isn't my best piece, but I do hope you guys at least kinda like it!
P.S: Kazutora's has slight spoilers for the manga, along with Sanzu's. Btw, these are mainly set in a world where it goes normal, but they're a hint more sane Sanzu and Kisaki
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🐯 Kazutora has major psychological issues, so, when he first got out of Juvenile Detention, you kept your distance from him, knowing if he ever got a hand on you, it wouldn't be the best
🐯 But, you were there for him while he went through his second sentence of Juvie, this one being for the death of Baji
🐯 You went alongside Draken and Takemichi when Kazutora was being held up, and you smiled and nodded to him as he cried. You knew he was trying to express himself and get better now, he couldn't, no, he wouldn't risk losing another person dear to him
🐯 Throughout the ten years he was placed in that building and speaking to professionals, he always awaited your weekly to daily visits
🐯 At the time he was released, you were living in a shared apartment with Chifuyu, who had asked if you were okay with Kazutora coming to stay with you guys for a while
🐯 Of course, you agreed and went with him to pick the now young man from his home of 10 years, and your close friend could tell that you were giddy about seeing your still-in-contact boyfriend
🐯 Kazutora just waited to see Chifuyu's vehicle, and he was quite happy when he saw his old friend, and, when he did see you come outside the opposite side, his eyes swelled up with tears. You actually came!
🐯 You and Chifuyu owned the Pet Store together, and you both welcomed Kazutora with open arms. He was like family after all, and it would be what Baji wanted
🐯 He and you began to grow just as close as you were back in his very youthful days, before the bike store incident and whatnot
🐯 Eventually, Chifuyu began to tease you guys that you treated the animals in the store as your own children. And while that did fluster Kazutora, he couldn't help but wonder; would you be alright with kids? Like when you guys finally settle together?
🐯 And now your chasing Chifuyu with a pissed off cat- oh shit the cat just lunged at him! Y/N!
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⚖️ Baji and you were childhood admirers. And by far this guy was super nervous whenever you even looked at him
⚖️ He loves to bring you around the city on his bike, especially after fights, he does like to flaunt off what he's got all to himself, after all, nobody can be duplicated, and he has the best S/O ever!
⚖️ Baji also adores to mess with you, probably not as much as a certain someone Mikey, but he does love messing with you. From grazing your arm while passing one another to messing your hair up, this guy loves to do it
⚖️ He is also very protective of you, and when I say someone is protective, I mean it
⚖️ Once time for example;
⚖️ You had been spending a lot of time alongside these guys from Toman, and they were brand-new members of the first division. And while he normally is happy to watch you get all giddy around people, he knew there was something up
⚖️ The thing that put it out like a sore thumb was when he was over at your house and he heard your phone ringing, making you groan and ask him to answer it
⚖️ Baji picked up the landline and just casually laid out who's house it was and if the person wanted to leave a message for either you or your family
⚖️ His eyes widened when he heard two chuckles on the other side of the line before hearing the most crude and revolting comments about you, and that was making him BEYOND pissed
⚖️ You were shocked to walk into your main room to see Baji yelling at the people on the other line, saying how disgusting they were and how they were surely going to be punished for such an action attempted on his S/O
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🎭 Sanzu and you had a difficult bond to decipher, so it shocks everyone when they see him walk up behind you and nuzzle into your neck
🎭 He, much like many of the Tokyo Revengers characters, is a very protective person. But he has a whole nother reason for being so protective of you, that being he didn't want you being hurt the same way that he has seen some others be
🎭 For some reason, I can see him being someone obsessed with crime shows and news, so in tole, I can see him watching those shows about people catching pedos (Undercover Underage for example)
🎭 Anyways, being with Sanzu is a roller coaster, especially when it comes to future him
🎭 He has gone through many problems throughout his life, from getting those scars on his mouth to dealing with substance abuse, this guy needs support like no other
🎭 And you were the perfect person to help him there
🎭 You, unlike many, did not just stand by and watch him get worse, instead, you jumped in and began to try helping your dearest with his problems, starting with his personal image of himself
🎭 Despite how many view him, Sanzu does have some issues with how he sees himself. He has a strained relationship with both his sister and brother, yet he somehow has an amazing one with you... how does that make any sense?
🎭 It doesn't. That is until you prompted the duo to actually speak to him about it, it was this action that prompted them to actually grow closer as a family, to be a real family again
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👓 Kisaki always had an eye for one person, Hina... that was, until you came into the picture
👓 You were always there for the male. Helping him calm down when his emotions finally cascaded around him, wrapping him in a web of overthinking
👓 But, every time you actually tried getting to know him, he would push you away. Until you assisted him in creating a plan to gain Hina's attention and break her and Takemichi away
👓 You could tell he was starting to have a mental break, and you weren't just going to stand aside knowing that you could've done something to help your friend. Even if this upset Hanma, it would be worth it
👓 Kisaki was raking his hands through his blonde hair, gritting his teeth while rubbing his temples, throwing his hands in a vicious cycle of brushing, gritting, and rubbing and repeat
👓 Walking behind him, you reached out and laid a cup of his favorite beverage on the table of your home's before lightly touching his shoulder, making him look at you in shock
👓 You smiled gently as he looked in your eyes as you wrapped your arms around his midsection. He couldn't believe it, you were hugging him! Didn't you think he was crazy for being so motivated to break such a happy couple up?
👓 Ever since that day, Kisaki and you somehow seemed closer than ever, closer than Hina and Takemichi seemed to be
👓 Speaking of the infamous time-traveler, he was shocked. This hadn't happened in any different timelines he traveled through. In all of them, Kisaki went mental and killed you. For what reason? He only had two hunches; you knew too much or he didn't want you to see him do anything worse...
👓 But, despite the shock, he'd have to admit, this was exactly what he wanted to happen. He always saw you guys as such a nice duo, it was nice to not worry about what Kisaki would do for once
610 notes ¡ View notes
alexsoenomel ¡ 6 months ago
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Through The Amplifier
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Summary: Seeing Metallica with Dean for his birthday 🎶
Based on: THIS
Pairing:  Dean Winchester x Reader
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI , implied smut, actual smut (but cute fluffy smut), mentions of death, Dean and Reader being nerds
Word count: 8k (I like writing backstories sue me)
Song mentioned (The actual setlist btw): Ride the Lightning,  For Whom The Bell Tolls, Lux Æterna, Until It Sleeps, Whiplash, Too Far Gone? Welcome Home (Sanitarium), No Leaf Clover, The Call of Ktulu, Moth into Flame,  Wherever I May Roam, Inamorata, Blackened, One and Enter Sandman ( Also Wrong Side of Heaven and Jekyll and Hyde by Five Finger Death Punch)
Note: This year I saw one of my favorite bands and finally fulfilled my lifelong dream. I went by myself and had an absolute blast so this idea just came to me.
Like/ reblog or both if you like it :)
“Are you sure you don't want to come with us, Sam?” I said as I pressed the buy tickets button. The website loaded for a couple of seconds before my phone went off. 
“Yeah, I'm sure. I don't listen to Metallica,” Sam told me as I checked my email to see two tickets for Metallica in Inglewood, California in six months.
“How can you NOT listen to Metallica?”
“Not my cup of tea, I guess.” 
“You, Charlie?”
“I don’t like old men in leather,” she simply said, making me chuckle.
To say that I was excited would be an understatement. I was overjoyed, ecstatic, and adrenaline-filled, already mentally preparing for the concert. It was indeed destiny. Metallica was performing two days after Dean's birthday in Inglewood, and since we both shared one dream: seeing them live, I saw it as a sign. Videos from their M72 world tour have bombarded my social media ever since it started, and I decided it was now or never. 
“How much are the tickets?” Sam asked.
I bit my lip and mumbled: “14k.”
“For two tickets?!” Charlie’s eyes widened in disbelief. 
“Each,” I simply said. 
" (Y/N)?! " Sam's gaze was on me, and I could feel it burning. I looked at him and smiled awkwardly, and he gave me a silent look of judgment. 
“I can explain!” 
“I'm listening!” He said, voice as sharp as a knife. 
“You know that rich vampire guy I was sleeping with before we met?” 
“The son of the rich vampire?” 
“Yeah, that one. After we killed them I found his laptop where he kept all of his secrets plus his bank account and asked Charlie to transfer everything to me.” 
“How much?”
“Everything,” Charle said proudly. 
“Untraceable and undetectable thanks to her, so technically it’s not our money,” I added.  
“But wasn't that two years ago?” 
“Yeah, he had a lot of money,” Charlie told Sam as he stared at me connecting the dots.
“That explains why the fridge is always full now.” 
“Yeah, you’re welcome,” Charlie said.
I chuckled. 
Sleeping with a vampire was probably the stupidest thing I have ever done. I didn’t know he was a vampire until I woke up one morning in his bed drowsy with two small holes on my neck. By then, I had been a hunter for ten years and The Winchesters were not in the picture yet. I’ve only heard stories about them; some hunters told me that they were monsters in human form, savage, causing chaos wherever they went; and others had kinder words in mind, like heroes, good, impossible to not like. After I realized what he was I was shocked, but not surprised. I had been collecting red flags like baseball cards all of my life, but I’ve never slept with an actual monster. I’ve been with narcissists, egomaniacs, momma’s boys, but never with a vampire. That day I made a mental note: “Never trust guys on dating apps. Sleazy pubs are better for finding sex.”
The day I planned to kill him and his old man was the day that I met the brothers and Charlie. I caught them trying to sneak into the property from the back, since the cameras there weren’t working. I saw them because I was trying to do the same so the servants wouldn’t see me. I could smell hunter’s blood from a mile away and they could too. Sam told me bodies were piling up in LA and I had no idea because they would cover their tracks well and I was too busy having sex with one of the perpetrators. Dean on the other hand was rolling his eyes because he couldn’t believe how reckless and stupid I was. We didn’t start on a good foot whatsoever. He thought I was annoying and I thought he was an obnoxious jerk. That was before we killed the vampire family. 
After we finished the job with minor injuries we went to celebrate –drink. It was Charlie’s idea and I still thank her for that. A few beers later I realized the reason why Dean and I didn’t see eye to eye. It was because we were two sides of the same coin. He was a stubborn nerd with alcoholic tendencies and daddy issues and so was I. And the best part was we both liked the same type of music. Sam and Charlie saw right through us and left after two hours and we stayed and talked for hours. A few more beers and a whole lot of bickering and flirting later, we were fucking in his car like it was our last day on this Earth. I collected one more red flag that night and had too many orgasms. Drunk on sex we both went to his motel room where we had even more sex and barely got any sleep. 
The next morning Sam and Charlie were grinning at us while we were trying to wake ourselves up with caffeine. 
“I see you guys had a lot of fun,” Sam said, noticing our dark cycles. Charlie giggled. 
“Yeah, too much fun,” Dean said, trying to keep his eyes open. 
When it was time to say goodbye and exchange numbers, Charlie had yet another brilliant idea. 
“You should come with us,” she said, leaving the brothers speechless, Dean especially. 
“A hunter alone in a world is a terrible thing,” she told them. 
“Did you just quote Maester Aemon?” I asked her. It was nice meeting a fellow Game of Thrones fan.
“You just became even more awesome!” She said and high-fived me. “She is coming with us, guys!” 
I was indeed alone. I started hunting when my parents got killed by a werewolf when I was 19. I had no extended family just one friend and she had no idea what I was doing in my free time.  
Sam and Dean just stared at each other but naturally agreed since Charlie was running the house and therefore I was moving to Lebanon, Kansas. 
For the first time, I had my room and a place I could call home. The bunker was gray and dark and grew on me rather quickly, but things between Dean and I were strange at first. We both thought we were going to fuck each other’s brains out and never see each other again, but the universe (in this case Charlie) had other plans. He was actively avoiding me until I told him to suck it up and talk to me. We didn’t speak, instead, we were memorizing each other’s scars and moles in different positions…over and over again. We even woke up Sam a couple of times while Charlie was clueless since she slept with headphones.
Slowly, we were falling for each other and each kiss became more fatal than the last and since we now lived together, we were spending every waking moment in each other's presence. It wasn’t until one evening we were drinking and a young handsome guy decided to shoot his shot with me and Dean in a drunken jealous rage told him to piss off when he saw his hand on my hip. When the guy refused to leave me alone Dean punched him in the face and we got kicked out of the bar. 
“What the fuck is wrong with you?! I was about to tell him to fuck off!” I screamed at him and he just stared at me in complete silence. 
“DEAN?”
He came closer and cupped my cheeks with his hands kissing me gently. This time the kiss was different; it wasn’t filled with lust; it was more gentle and vulnerable. His lips were as soft as ever and for the first time I was so painfully aware of them, I wanted him to devour me whole. 
“Why are you such a dick sometimes?” I asked, his face inches away from mine.
“I don’t like when people touch what’s mine,” he said, putting a strand of hair behind my ear. I suddenly became aware of my heartbeat. 
“Since when do I belong to you?” I asked him, trying to keep a cool head even though my body was on fire. We never made it official, but we both knew it was inevitable. 
“Since I belong to you, dickhead,” he said, and from that day on I was his and he was mine. 
***
 I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t in love with Dean. We never said the words, maybe because we were too afraid to verbalize our feelings like grownups, but I knew he loved me just as much as I loved him. His eyes would always sparkle whenever we shared eye contact – even when we fought. He fought a lot, but mostly on hunts, because I would never listen to him and he knew better. In the end, we would get the job done and have angry sex to blow some steam. I’d never thought I’d end up dating a male equivalent of me. I could finally say I was happy with my life, even though objectively speaking it was awful 99% of the time. I was thankful for my chosen family and the fact that I got to experience love for the first time. 
***
I had a hard time keeping the secret, but six months later it was time to celebrate his day. Sam, Charlie, and I decided to make everything Metallica-themed. His cake was a classic chocolate cake but the candles were two small guitars one white and one black (one had the number 3 on it and the other one had 6), The frosting was black and had a picture of the band from the 80s when Cliff was still alive. Dean loved Cliff’s bass, so we knew he was going to love the cake. 
“Happy birthday, Dean!” We all said in unison as I was putting the cake on the table in front of him. Dean’s eyes widened, sparkling with delight, as he stared at the cake. His mouth dropped open in a gasp, revealing a grin that spread from ear to ear. His cheeks flushed with a rosy shade, and he could hardly contain the bubbling excitement as his eyebrows lifted in disbelief. It was a moment of pure wonder etched across his face. He blew his candles after we sang Happy Birthday to him and now it was time to open the presents. 
“This is from me,” Sam said and gave him a bag. 
 Dean pulled a black shirt from it. 
It was a beautiful Metallica shirt, a brand new one from their 72 Seasons merch collection with their yellow album cover and Metallica written on the top. 
“Holy crap a Metallica shirt!” Dean said looking at the beautiful design. Sam smiled at him. 
“Thank you, Sam! It’s perfect!” He then added. 
“You’re welcome, Dean,” Sam said and hugged his brother.
“Now it’s my turn!” Charlie exclaimed and gave him her present. 
Dean pulled out a CD and a cassette tape from a small box– their 72 Seasons CD and a limited cassette tape of the same album. 
“Oh my God! Charlie!” Dean was bursting with excitement and my heart was melting. I don’t think I remember the last time I saw him this happy. His inner child was healing mine – he deserved the world.
“One is for your car and the other is for your laptop!” 
Dean immediately jumped from the chair and hugged Charlie as tight as possible. 
“Thank you,” he whispered. 
“You’re welcome, birthday boy.”
Now it was my turn. While he was licking the frosting with his fingers I sent him his ticket. 
Dean was staring at me as I was smiling back at him. 
“Check your phone, handsome,” I told him, trying to contain my excitement. 
Dean's brow furrowed just a touch, creating a faint line across his forehead as he checked his phone to see that he got an email from me. 
“What is this?” He mumbled under his breath and opened it. 
Dean’s face lit up with pure joy as realization washed over him. His eyes widened. His mouth dropped open in a wide grin, showcasing his astonishment, while a breathless laugh escaped him. He looked at me for a second before staring back at his phone.
“ARE YOU FREAKIN’ SERIOUS?” He then asked in disbelief. 
“Yeah, and guess what? We will be right in front of the stage,” I said and showed him my ticket on my phone. 
His cheeks flushed with color, and his eyebrows shot up, giving him a look of sheer exhilaration. He could hardly contain himself, there was an almost childlike glee as he wrapped his hands around my waist and lifted me, completely swept away by the moment. I squealed as he spinned me around like I was a ballerina. It was a mix of shock and joy, a perfect reflection of his excitement to see his favorite band live. When he kissed me my feet hit the ground. 
I knew he would remember his 36th birthday for the rest of his life.
***
We packed our bags the next day and went to the airport. Our flight was at 6 pm, so we arrived around 3 pm after lunch. Sam and Charlie came with us because Dean didn’t want to leave Baby at the airport parking lot. We said our goodbyes and went to check in. 
“Don’t let him do anything stupid,” Sam told me. 
“Don’t worry I won’t! We will be stupid together,” I grinned and Sam looked concerned. 
*** 
The flight was quick and smooth; we didn't even feel it. Since it wasn't my money (well not really) I decided to splurge and booked us two nights in the four-star hotel next to the YouTube Theater where the concert was scheduled. They had a pool, spa, and breakfast buffet, so naturally, I figured Dean was going to appreciate it. 
“I don't have swim trunks, (Y/N),” Dean told me as we were entering our room. 
“Yeah I know, that's why I bought you a pair a couple of weeks ago,” I said.
The room was an epitome of elegance, bathed in warm light from sheer curtains. A plush king-sized bed, adorned with crisp white linens and a couple of soft pillows was calling our names. A sleek nightstand held a vintage lamp in the corner, while a polished desk offered a coffee maker and a big flat-screen TV handing across the bed was screaming Dean’s name. The en-suite bathroom was heaven, featuring a spacious glass shower, complete with fragrant candles and premium toiletries.
Every detail was screaming luxury and I knew I made the right choice.
We put our bags on the floor and I turned to Dean to see him staring back at me. 
“Happy birthday, handsome!” I said and kissed him gently. He immediately pulled me closer to him, closing the gap between us, deepening the kiss, and making me moan a little. I could feel his stubble on my face, his hands on my hips, slowing moving downwards to cup my ass. 
“Shower?” He asked before moving his lips to my neck. 
“Please,” I managed to say. 
After having a quick shower we went to bed and he made love to me until we eventually fell asleep only knowing the sound of each other's names. I loved that man with all my heart and soul. 
***
The next morning we woke up at around 8 am, which was our usual time, and went to have breakfast. 
The breakfast buffet was a sight to see. There were freshly baked pastries like croissants, danishes, and muffins, all warm and inviting. A big bowl of colorful fruits sat nearby, with strawberries, melons, and pineapple ready to be picked.
In another section, you could find hot dishes: scrambled eggs, crispy bacon, and plump sausages. There was also a selection of artisanal breads, with butter and a variety of jams to choose from. The drink station had fresh coffee and juices. Dean and I were salivating. 
“Oh, this bacon looks crisp!” Dean said joyfully as he put a handful of bacon on his plate. 
“If monsters don't kill us, high cholesterol sure will,” I chuckled and put a couple of pieces next to my eggs. 
Breakfast of champions: bacon, eggs, fluffy croissants, coffee and for dessert fluffy American pancakes with maple syrup. No matter where we went we would always eat the same thing for breakfast.
“The pancakes are so good, my God!” I said as I stuffed my face.
“I need more bacon!” Dean said and went to get more. 
After breakfast, we ended up taking an hour-long post-breakfast nap.
***
The concert was at 9 pm. After we woke up Dean wanted to go swimming before lunch so I gave him his new and only pair of swim trunks: blue shorts with yellow ducks all over. 
“Seriously?” Dean said, looking at himself in the mirror next to our bed.
“I look ridiculous.”
I tried so hard not to laugh.
“It was either ducks or small purple dildos.” 
Dean's face went blank as he looked at himself once more.
“Ducks are good.” 
I, on the other hand, bought a black bikini that was perfect for my body. The sleek design highlighted my figure, and the black color added a touch of elegance. I was oozing confidence and sexiness and Dean couldn't get enough of it. His gaze never left my body and it was filled with admiration and affection. His expression was a mix of pride and appreciation. He was on another planet.
“Dean?” 
“Um?” He asked, his eyes still fixed on my figure, his mouth partially opened. 
“Your gun is showing.” 
He looked down and saw what I meant. 
“Crap!”  
“Let me take care of that before we go!” I chuckled and pointed to the bed. 
***
The pool was nice and big. After an hour of fucking like rabbits we went for a swim only to realize we were too exhausted to do anything with our bodies, so we went to the sauna. 
In the sauna, my skin felt like it was being enveloped in a warm embrace. The heat made me aware of every pore, and I could feel the sweat starting to bead up and trickle down. It was both soothing and invigorating; my skin felt alive, flushed with warmth. 
“I can't believe you planned all of this,” Dean said and closed his eyes, enjoying the sweat dripping from his skin.
I wanted to say it. I wanted to say those goddamn words, but I bit my tongue once more. 
“I know, I'm the best,” I said proudly, while in the back of my mind the sentence "Love makes you do crazy things" echoed over and over again. 
***
Lunch time, another post food nap and it was time to get ready. Dean wore his usual: jeans, a new Metallica shirt he got from Sam, a leather jacket, and combat boots. I decided it was time to turn myself into a rock’n’roll bombshell. I was going to wear leather black pants, Dean's old Ride the Lightning shirt I “borrowed” and never gave it back, and my staple: black Dr. Martens. I did my hair all nice and curly, and my makeup was a bit over the top and not something I usually do.
I was standing in front of the mirror as I started with a flawless matte base, then created a smokey eye with deep blacks and a dramatic wing. Thick eyeliner and voluminous false lashes (that I bought just for this occasion) made my eyes pop. I swiped on dark, matte plum lipstick and defined my brows to frame my face.
A touch of contour enhanced my cheekbones, and I added a hint of shimmer to my inner corners. Feeling powerful and sexy I was ready to heal my inner child with the love of my life. 
“How do I look?” I asked Dean as I put on my leather jacket. 
He bit his lower lip and scanned every inch of me in a second.
“Freakin’ gorgeous,” he exclaimed, making me blush. 
He was never shy to give me compliments and show me how attracted he was to me. Even in pajamas, dying from period cramps, and crying because my favorite ice cream was sold out, he would still tell me how amazing and pretty I was. Like I said, I loved that man with all my heart and soul, it was pathetic and beautiful.
I kissed him and we were on our way. 
We came four hours earlier at around 5 pm, a few minutes before they opened the gates and let us in. In an hour Ice Nine Kills was going to perform and after them Five Fingers Death Punch. When we came in, the pit was already filled with people, but it wasn't full yet. We found a spot just a few inches from the stage. My heart was pounding, I couldn't believe I was there, while Dean was squeezing my hand tightly not wanting to let go. 
“Do you want a beer?” Dean asked me. 
“I don't think that's a good idea. If we drink we will have to go and if we have to go we will abandon this perfect spot. A lot of people are already coming in.” 
Dean nodded.
“Water?”
“That will do,” I agreed, considering we would be standing probably until midnight, staying hydrated was important.
He left to buy us two cups and came back after five minutes. The space was already getting crowded and I was growing impatient. 
“I still can't believe we are here,” he told me. He was buzzing with excitement, eyes shining and bouncing on his heels. 
“Do you think they will play Enter Sandman?” I asked him. 
“I hope so. Pops used to play that song all the time in the car when I was a kid. Sam hated it.” 
“My dad used to sing me that song whenever I couldn't fall asleep. I was a lousy sleeper but for some reason, that song would always put me into a coma.”
I told Dean as I remembered how much I missed my old man.
“You're still a lousy sleeper,” he said, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. 
“Yeah, because now I cannot sleep without you,” I said and kissed his cheek. I always had trouble sleeping, going to bed after 3 am, waking up at 3 pm, tossing and turning, nightmares, and so on… until I started sleeping next to him. I was never a big cuddler, especially since I would always feel uncomfortable whenever someone would try to hold me while I slept, but with him it was different. I would sleep like a baby next to him, he was home to me. His heartbeat was my white noise and his warmth was my safe space. 
He smiled back at me and at that moment the show began. 
Ice Nine Kills was…something else. Dean and I were trying to decide if we liked the music or not, but one thing we agreed on was: that we LOVED the performance. Gore, blood, and chainsaws were all far too familiar, but we especially loved horror references. The music was not bad, but considering we were both classic rock fanatics it wasn't something we would actively listen to. 
“I love the Nightmare on Elm Street reference,” I commented after they finished the first song. 
“Not bad,” Dean agreed as he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind and pulled me closer. 
We were jamming to songs we'd never heard before. People around us were either utterly confused or dancing and head-banging like it was their last day on Earth. 
“Oh! That's the Texas Chainsaw Massacre!” Dean said in my ear. 
“I know,” I laughed, but I don't think he heard me considering the music was pounding in my ears. 
After a good hour, they were done. The crowd was growing impatient again and so were we. 
“Five Finger Death Punch is next!” I said and took a sip of my almost empty cup of water. 
“I'm kinda excited about that.”
And to be honest I was too. We heard a couple of their songs like Wrong Side of Heaven and Jekyll and Hyde and instantly fell in love with the singer's voice. Dean even said the vocalist sounded a lot like David Draiman of Disturbed and I definitely could hear that. 
We were waiting for what felt like hours and my legs started to hurt. I forgot what it felt like standing for so long; the last time I went to a concert I was 16 and my family was still alive. Dad took me to see Deep Purple, it was an unforgettable day. 
Five Finger Death Punch came at exactly 8 pm. The band made everyone jump and scream. Their energy was unmatched and the vocalist was giving his all. His voice was strong. The guitarist even threw a couple of picks and Dean almost caught one.
“Damn it!” He shouted. 
“Don't worry, maybe you will catch one from Kirk later.” 
We all completely lost it when they closed the show with the iconic song Dean and I both loved: Jekyll and Hyde. I was singing my heart out with my man and the rest of the crowd while the singer was jumping around the stage. This whole band had such a strong presence, and I decided to check their other stuff after the show. 
"Thank you all for being an incredible audience! Your energy means the world to us. I hope you enjoyed the show as much as we loved performing for you. It was an honor to open for one of the greatest bands to ever exist! Enjoy the rest of the show and be safe!” The singer said and the whole stadium screamed and clapped. 
“DAMN RIGHT!” Dean yelled and I smiled. 
Seeing Dean so at peace with life and enjoying the present moment made my heart flutter. That man deserved the world and even though I couldn't give him one where he was truly happy (mainly because that would require him to leave hunting behind and he would never do that) I could still make his world a little bit brighter. 
I turned around and kissed him, leaving a smudge of lipstick on his perfectly full lips. 
“Are you ready?” I asked him whipping the stain from his lips with my thumb. 
Dean grinned widely, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "Abso-freakin’-lutely!” 
People around us were shouting, screaming, and clapping from excitement, and some people went to get more beer, and pee before the show– it was a beautiful chaos around us. 
“My legs are killing me already,” Dean complained, trying to stretch as much as he could in the sea of people. 
“Yeah, mine turned to stone,” I said and checked my phone only to see they were 20 minutes late. Being late was my biggest pet peeve; even the legendary band that was Metallica didn’t have an excuse. I groaned silently and looked at the empty stage again. I was impatient and filled with adrenaline; ready to sing my heart out, but at the same time I was missing the hotel bed. 
Ten minutes later, our favorite chaotic drummer appeared, sending the whole stadium into a state of pure excitement and borderline madness. He waved and then Robert and Kirk appeared with their guitars and big smiles on their faces. The crowd was cheering even louder. 
“Kirk’s hair is fabulous!” I told Dean, while we were clapping. 
“Yeah, Sam should take some notes!”
And finally, there he was, in the flesh, our favorite voice and my favorite silver fox: James. I've had a crush on James ever since I was a little girl and seeing him right in front of me in his black leather pants, black boots, black shirt, and his beautiful gray beard and hair made my heart beat faster. The man had the presence of a God and I was his loyal worshiper. 
“Oh my God! IT'S HAPPENING!” Dean yelled and hugged me from behind. 
As the lights dimmed and the crowd erupted, Dean and I felt a surge of adrenaline once again. The opening chords of Ride the Lightning sliced through the air, and we couldn’t contain ourselves. With a wild grin, Dean threw his fists in the air, the pulse of the music igniting a fire within him. I was too starstruck to sing, my voice too shy to come out as I was standing there with my phone in the air trying to record a video with my shaky hands. It was my dad's favorite song and I wanted to immortalize this very moment.
Meanwhile, Dean was transported into another dimension. He swayed to the heavy riffs, shouting the lyrics as they echoed around him. Each note was a release, a reminder of the thrill of being alive. At that moment, we were just fans—no monsters, no worries—lost in the pure magic of live music.
“GOOD EVENING INGLEWOOD! ARE YOU READY TO HAVE SOME FUN?” James' voice was powerful with a gravelly timbre that conveyed excitement. We all screamed and with that, they started playing the second song. 
“HOLY SHIT!” I yelled when I realized it was indeed For Whom The Bell Tolls.
As the iconic opening riff surged through the venue, Dean’s heart raced. He felt the familiar rush of nostalgia wash over him, memories of late nights with Sam on the road in the Impala echoing in his mind. The deep, heavy chords resonated in his chest, and he instinctively raised his fists, the crowd's energy fueling his excitement. 
With each thundering beat, he found himself singing along. His grin widened, and he couldn’t help but sway with the music, lost in the moment. For Dean, it wasn’t just a song; it was a reminder of everything he fought for—the bond with his brother, the battles they faced, and the moments of joy amidst the chaos. This was rock and roll at its finest, and he was right where he belonged.
 I, on the other hand, was trying so hard not to cry. The haunting melody of For Whom the Bell Tolls wrapped around me, pulling at my heartstrings. I felt a mix of exhilaration and nostalgia, the weight of the moment overwhelming as memories flooded back—times spent with my family, laughter shared, my mom telling my dad to turn the volume down. Oh, how I missed my parents at that very moment! The intensity of the crowd, the energy of the band, and the raw emotion in the music made it hard to hold back tears. It was a cathartic release. Dean was standing behind me pulling me closer with one hand as I was holding onto his index finger. I wiped my tears and sang my heart out for my mom and dad and after they finished the song I was left with a slight pain in my right ear. I might have forgotten to bring earplugs, but the truth was I didn't want to nor cared about protecting my ears from potential damage. To quote Dean: “Metallica is too good for earplugs.” 
After bringing back so many good memories it was time to mix it up and play something from their newest album.
The melody of Lux Æterna hit me like a bolt of electricity. It opened with a powerful, aggressive guitar riff that instantly raised the tension in the air. As the verses rolled in, the haunting yet energetic melody intertwined with a sense of urgency. When the chorus exploded, the vocals soared, filling me with a mix of exhilaration and defiance. I was completely engulfed in the sound, feeling every note resonate deep within me, embodying everything I loved about Metallica as Dean pulled me closer to him while we were jumping in sync. 
“Lux Æternaaaaaaaaa!” We would sing completely out of tune with James. 
As Lux Æterna blared through the speakers, the crowd became a living entity, energy surging with every note. Fans pumped their fists and sang along, their voices rising in a powerful roar. Some swayed with eyes closed, while others jumped, danced, and headbanged, united in exhilaration. 
“You guys are amazing!” James said. He was covered in sweat and I was salivating. The man was a definition of aging like fine wine and my daddy issues were showing. 
I turned to Dean who was hypnotized, his eyes never leaving the stage. 
"Would you give me a hall pass if I cheated on you with James?"
Dean arched an eyebrow, a playful smirk crossing his face. “James, huh?”
Amusement in his eyes, he added. “If you think I’m letting you run off with a rock star, you’ve got another thing coming.”
“Really?” I smirked.
“You’re mine—rock star or not.” 
I couldn’t help but laugh at Dean’s reaction. “You think I’d leave you for James Hetfield? Really?” I teased, arching an eyebrow. His playful jealousy was endearing, and it warmed my heart.
Dean smirked, leaning in with that familiar teasing glint in his eyes. “Just making sure you know where my head’s at,” he said, his tone light but with an edge of seriousness.
“Rock star or not, I’m the one who gets to take you home.” He chuckled, and I could see the warmth in his gaze. “It’s you and me against the world, always.” At that moment, I felt a rush of affection, knowing our bond was stronger than any fleeting fantasy.
As the opening notes of Until It Sleeps fill the venue, the crowd erupts into a frenzy, a sea of raised fists. The energy was electric, and I felt the pulse of the music vibrating through me as everyone swayed together, singing along with wild abandon.
Beside me, Dean’s face lit up with pure joy, his excitement infectious. I glanced at him, my heart swelling with happiness, knowing this moment was deepening our connection. Surrounded by the thrumming bass and the roar of the crowd, I realized this night will be one we’ll always treasure. The crowd swayed around us, but at this moment, it was just us. He sang every word with fervor, and I couldn't help but join in.
The set list was out of this world: Whiplash, Too Far Gone? Welcome Home (Sanitarium), No Leaf Clover, The Call of Ktulu, and Moth into Flame are just a few they chose. 
During Wherever I May Roam Dean and I were screaming every word so hard that I knew our vocal cords would hate us later. We would usually listen to that song after every successful hunt. It became a staple, a reminder of why we do what we do, and a beacon of hope. 
“HOLY SHIT!” I shouted at him with a huge grin on my face.
“HOLY SHIT!” Dean shouted back and kissed me.
The band was looking so good.
I loved seeing Robert jamming with the fans with his signature long and beautiful braids while absolutely nailing every note on his base and Kirk just being Kirk and owning the stage in his green leather jacket. Lars was an absolute beast even at 60 years old. 
When they started playing Inamorata, James took his time to walk around the stage while playing his guitar and smiled at us all. I could see his face as clear as day: his blue eyes had that sparkle of happiness; he had been doing this for decades and you could still see how much it made him overjoyed to see people enjoying his band's music, his smile was infectious and captivating and I couldn't believe he was standing right in front of me. 
I turned to see Dean – he was completely mesmerized, eyes wide and mouth slightly open, staring at James as if he were witnessing a miracle. I chuckled softly, knowing he was the happiest man alive. It was beautiful to see this vulnerable side of him, and I couldn’t help but lean closer, sharing in his joy as the music enveloped us.
The next two songs were Blackened and One. To be completely honest I forgot about Blackened. I was so high on adrenaline, oxytocin, and serotonin that I couldn't remember the song and I was too embarrassed to ask Dean about it. I knew it was an old song, a classic, and I knew Dean would give me a death stare so I kept my mouth shut and listened to him sing (yell). 
After the forgotten song James and his bandmates decided to rip our hearts out.
The ominous sounds of distant gunfire and explosions played through the speakers and the crowd fell into a hushed reverence. The chilling audio of war set an intense backdrop for the song that used to make me cry. The moment I recognized the opening notes of  One, a thrill shot through me, and I felt my pulse quicken in anticipation. It was as if the world around me faded away, leaving only the haunting melody that resonated with the depths of my soul. I never thought I would hear this song live. My dad showed me the music video when I was eleven (my mother was furious, and thought it was inappropriate) and I cried my eyes out, but loved the song. I rarely listen to that song though, it was too raw and reflected sorrow and despair in a way I knew far too well. 
Dean took my hand and placed a soft kiss as James started to sing. I pulled him by his shirt and kissed him, wanting this moment to last forever. He cupped my face pulling me closer, ignoring the sound of people around us screaming the lyrics. It was just me and him, always. 
When I broke the kiss I was inches away from his face. 
As the crowd roared and the lights pulsed, I turned to Dean, adrenaline still rushing through me. With One echoing around us, I blurted out, “I love you.”
Time froze as surprise washed over his face, vulnerability breaking through his bravado. “Yeah?” he asked, his voice barely audible over the music. At that moment, amidst the chaos, I saw that beneath his tough exterior, he was just as scared of love as he was of losing it.
His eyes locked onto mine, and a slow smile spread across his face. “You mean that?” he asked, his voice softening amidst the music.
Before I could respond, he pulled me close, his arm wrapping around my waist. “I love you too,” he whispered in my ear.
At that moment, surrounded by the concert’s chaos, everything felt right. 
Throughout the concert, I took a couple of videos and even got a picture of James shredding his guitar for my new phone wallpaper, but nothing could prepare me for the next song.
“ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?” James said as the opening riff of Enter Sandman sliced through the air, the arena exploded into a frenzy of energy. Lights flashed in sync with the relentless beat, illuminating faces filled with exhilaration. The heavy guitar reverberated through my body, a primal force that united the crowd in a shared heartbeat.
“DEAN!” I shouted, jumping up and down in excitement. 
“I CAN DIE HAPPY NOW!” He screamed. 
Everyone was singing, fists pumping, the raw intensity of Metallica's sound creating a charged atmosphere that felt almost electric. It was a moment of pure chaos and exhilaration, where the music enveloped us, and nothing else mattered.
Suddenly giant yellow and black balls began to fall from above, bouncing energetically into the crowd. They bounced and rolled, creating an atmosphere of pure chaos and fun. Fans reached up, trying to catch them, laughter and cheers erupting as the balls added an unexpected burst of excitement to the already electrifying performance. The sight of those bright, playful orbs amidst the intensity of the music created a surreal, unforgettable experience. One fell on us too as we jumped with other people making it fly to our left. I was trying to take a video but my hand was shaking while I couldn't stop jumping next to Dean screaming and feeling my throat slowly tighten. 
Kirk nailed his solo, while his hair stayed fabulous and James was getting himself ready for the big finale. 
“Hush, baby, don't say a word,”
“And never mind that noise you heard,”
“It's just the beasts under your bed,”
“In your closet, in your head!” 
Dean and I were screaming at each other's faces, filled with nothing but love for one another. 
“Exit light!”
“Enter night!”
“Grain of sand!”
“Exit light!”
“Enter night!”
“Take my hand!”
“We're off to never-never land, yeah”
James voice was so raw, so strong, I was still trying to figure out how he was 61 years old. 
“Boo!”
“Yeah-yeah!”
“Yo, whoa!” 
The song ended. I was already getting sad because I knew it was the end. I checked my phone and it was almost midnight. 
The song finished and we all cheered and clapped wanting more.
I heard people yell encore, but after 15 songs they were done. Lars threw his drumsticks at us and someone behind us caught it. He said thank you but the crowd was so loud I couldn't hear him. Until he got in front of the microphone and said: “You were amazing tonight! Thank you for coming!” 
We all screamed even louder. Robert came and tossed a couple of picks and people in front of us were fighting to catch it. He threw five picks in total, covering every part of the pit.
“Come on! I want one!” Dean yelled. We were all still clapping. 
“Wait for Kirk! We are close!” I told him. 
He indeed came next and blessed fans with a couple of picks, but Dean was now too close to catch one and it flew right above his head…
“DAMN IT!” 
James, covered in sweat and looking like a God came right in front of us. I was standing there, completely ignoring Dean and trying to remember every corner of that man's face. While I was in Neverland and watching James throw his picks I didn't even register Dean screaming my name. 
“(Y/N)!” 
“Huh?” I snapped back finally and saw him holding a small white pick that had White Fang written on it.
“OH MY GOD!” I yelled. 
“I DID IT!” He yelled back. 
I loved seeing my man truly happy. I loved that band and I loved everything about that day. 
***
Getting out of the venue was a nightmare. The crowd surged around us, bodies jostling and voices blending into a chaotic mix of excitement and exhaustion. I clung to Dean’s arm, grateful for his steady presence as we stepped into the cool night air.
“That was insane,” I said, smiling up at him. He grinned back, eyes still shining with adrenaline. As we navigated through the sea of fans, I felt a rush of happiness, knowing we had shared something truly unforgettable.
“That was incredible!” Dean exclaimed, his voice full of energy. “ Best night ever! Best birthday ever!” His smile widened as he looked at me, clearly still buzzing from the concert. 
My legs were in pain, I was thirsty and sleepy but it was all worth it. 
We were back in our hotel room 10 minutes later, both covered in sweat ready to sleep. 
I took off my clothes right away, feeling like my legs were on fire. 
“I'm in so much pain!” I complained. 
“I cannot feel my legs!” Dean said. 
“I'm gonna shower. Wanna join?” I was in my underwear standing next to him waiting for him to stop staring at my boobs.
“Coming!” He simply said and started taking off his pants while his eyes never left my boobs. I loved the fact he loved my body. I, like any woman in this cruel “man's world” sometimes would look at myself in the mirror and just hate what was staring back at me. His little stares were a strong reassurance that I was bullshitting.
Usually, showers meant fooling around (shower sex was complicated), but we were too tired for anything but kisses. We lazily washed ourselves in silence, kissing each other here and there. 
“So you love me, huh?” He smirked between kisses. I just smiled at him as the warm water was pouring down my back. 
“Yeah, imagine that! You're loveable,” I said as I was shampooing his hair. His eyes were closed but his mouth formed a small o. 
“Well…” 
“Shut up!” I told him. 
After we were all nice and clean it was time to finally get some sleep. I put on a clean pair of underwear and Dean's old Led Zeppelin shirt I also “borrowed” and he put on a clean pair of black boxers. 
We snuggled underneath the blanket, my head resting on his chest, feeling my body slowly relaxing and falling asleep. 
“You really think I'm loveable?” Dean asked, suddenly. I was half asleep, but this question tore my heart a little and now I was wide awake. I knew he thought he was unworthy of love, unlovable, unclean and it made me incredibly sad, especially because he was the definition of a hero with a heart of gold. 
“It’s hard to not fall in love with you, Dean. If you could only see yourself through my eyes, you would understand,” I told him and lifted my head and kissed him, but this time deepening the kiss. I was tired, and my body was in pain, but the urge to be close to him, to love him, was consuming me. He moaned into the kiss and immediately got on top of me. My hands went in his damp hair. 
We kissed for a while, our souls intertwined, our bodies keeping each other warm before his hand went into my now wet panties, his finger entered me making me arch my back, moaning even louder into the kiss. I was still in pain, but Dean's touch was slowly healing me until all I could feel was pleasure and love. His finger suddenly left my panties and I was left needy and desperate, but he wasted no time and took off his boxers, his dick fully hard. “Lift your hips, sweetheart!” He demanded and I did, letting him take off my underwear. 
He kissed me again before he positioned himself between my legs and entered me. I was so wet and desperate that I took him all instantly. 
“You feel so good!” He whispered, his voice deep and raspy, sending shivers down my whole body. I dug my nails into his back as he started to move, light moans escaping my lips.
We were one. One soul, two bodies, always. 
“Dean!” I moaned pathetically over and over again as his pace became more erratic. I was so close, so so close.
“God, I love when you say my name!” He managed to say as his face was buried in my neck. “Say it again!” He said and slammed into me. 
“FUCK, DEAN!” I screamed, digging my nails into his back, even harder. I could feel the orgasm coming like a tidal wave. 
“Oh God!” He moaned into my ear and slammed into me over and over again. 
My toes curled, my whole body stiff as my skin was covered in goosebumps. An intense wave of electricity rushed through me as I came so hard I could see stars. Dean didn't stop until he came into me, filling me up completely. I'll have to worry about potential pregnancy tomorrow since we completely forgot the concept of condoms. 
We were both breathless, covered in sweat, and panting in each other's faces. 
“Best birthday ever?” I asked him.
“Best birthday ever,” he smiled. 
I was not ready to check out tomorrow. I was not ready to board that plane and say goodbye to this hotel room. I was not ready for this to end. 
As I was laying on his chest, slowly drifting away with my thoughts and as my body relaxed and felt heavier with each passing minute, Dean was playing with my hair and before I started dreaming I heard him whisper:
“I love you so much, sweetheart.” 
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little-alien-duck ¡ 11 months ago
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I think voyager should've had a rascals episode bc I think that chakotay would've been fully unable to stop twelve year old katie janeway from captaining her ship while teenaged tuvok argues that this is a logical course of action. (the b-plot of this episode is ten yr old tom introducing seven yr old seven of nine, pun intended, to childhood pranks and both of them getting in trouble but like with an authority figure who is reasonable about it and tom cries btw)
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yourloveaton ¡ 5 months ago
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Hi! I saw all your AU art just recently and noticed you were saying we can ask you about it! (ITS SUCH AWESOME ART BTW I ADORE IT THE WAY YOU DRAW THEM IS AKAKAKKDMSMAMD!!!!)
I don’t have a specific question, but I do want to know more about it.
So can you just tell me anything about it?
Ahhh THANK YOU SO MUCH !!! I’m so happy that you liked my au art and wanna know more about it !! You have no idea how much joy that makes me feel 🥹💖
Well I can tell you some info and facts about the au, how I’m planning to develop it and all that !! It’s still fairly new and I did it out of nowhere at 3 am in the morning because I thought of my old ideas that I had years ago when undertale was on it’s prime but I was too young to bring ideas to life properly HAHAHA I hope my writing doesn’t bore you!
The au is pretty much founded on the idea of what if Sans also used to be a royal guard when he was younger? Boom. That’s where it spiralled and now I don’t know how revert back to who I was before because I ended up doodling a lot of undertale stuff along with the au, it didn’t help with the fact that my very good beloved friend kept encouraging me and feeding my inner demons of my undertale brainrot HAHAHA
I’m planning to develop the au into 2 parts: Before Undertale and after Undertale.
Before undertale is basically the events that happened before the plot of Undertale took place while after undertale is when they’re finally on the surface and the events that will happen on there! Sounds very generic and common I know, that’s why I’m going to try and develop it to be a bit different and hope that the au is not boring or developed horribly :’D It will take some time though since I know developing an au with a unique plot is gonna be very challenging, there are so many ways to mess it up and aghhh I really don’t wanna mess it up TT
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Here are the main cast of the before undertale, this is a very OLD sketch that I made to figure out who’s there and how old they would be before I proceed to develop on the characters. So their heights might not be as accurate as it is in the sketch.
Also DISCLAIMER, Alphys and Undyne never met in before Undertale, so just know there’s no weird agenda going on here! They first met during Undertale plot when they’re both adults (Alphys 29, Undyne 23) so it’s all good!! I thought I needed to point that out because the age gap might seem alarming at first glance knowing they’re officially a couple 🙏 The before undertale plot begins at the age displayed on the sketch, and it ends after uhh.. 10 years? Yeah it’s ten years of events before the main undertale story starts!
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I do want to portray the skele family with wholesome moments and you know, how great they are! Well that is before the downfall but we ain’t talking about that for now !! They’re just so beloved to me and I know they were such a sweet family AND WOULD HAVE VERY FUNNY MOMENTS IN WHICH I WANNA DRAW IT OUT!! So yeah, stay tuned for silly mini comics of them eheh
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At first, I wanted Trickster (yes I’m calling his royal guard nickname, it’s like a whole different persona of his (alter ego???) where he’s energetic and acts very silly, whimsical, presenting puzzles and quizzes to his opponents sometimes but also can be very intimidating and prove that yeah, there’s a reason why he can be like that cuz it’s HIM) to be nothing more than a mischievous silly royal guard that wanted to keep causing trouble for Gaster but then it grew to be a bigger thing where he unintentionally became the symbol of hope and an entertainer for the whole underground before Trickster disappeared without a trace(?)
I’m still working on this whole concept so not everything is settled yet!! Well what I can also say about Trickster is that Alphys might be involved with the whole Trickster business too eheh
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I’ve been practicing on drawing the characters so that I can draw better for this little au project of mine, I hope I can share my progress with you guys as things go on !!!
That’s the general stuff I’ve thought of so far, I hope you enjoy reading ! Thank you for reading and do feel free to ask whenever you have questions about the au or anything else :D✨✨✨✨
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theflagscene ¡ 1 year ago
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The hand rubbing scene is the gayest sex scene GMMtv has ever had on screen, allow me to explain to you why.
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Gifs by @wanderlust-in-my-soul ďżź
Now I can’t speak as someone who is completely blind (obviously) but I can speak as someone who has been progressively losing their sight for the past 15 years - ironically enough from a car accident. Why hello Day, I see you! (pun intended) But I’m also a person who grew up HoH (hard of hearing) from the age of two years old onward, I had tubes put in my ears, wore hearing aids, the whole shebang. The chances of me actually regaining my ability to hear completely was very very slim, the fact that I did actually end up regaining some - not all - of my hearing by my late twenties was a damn shock to us all. The point being, when you are a person who’s lost one of your senses that you are used to having, your body starts to overcompensate.
Most everyone has heard/read/seen things about how removing one sense can lead to your other ones becoming stronger. There’s even been studies that show people born deaf or deafened at a very young age, that their brain starts to rewire itself to allow them to experience sound in a visual way, via touch. It’s sort of like how blind people learn to read braille in a way, the touch creates a picture in your mind allowing you to see the way that word looks and sounds and feels. Theres a whole bit in Scientific America you can check out if you want that breaks it down in layman terms without the writing acting like you’re stupid, which is always nice when it comes to medical jargon lol.
So my point that to Day, his sense of touch is not only in overdrive because it like much of the rest of his senses - smell seems to be a big one they’re leading with - are scambling to try and overcompensate for the sudden lack of sight that is getting worse as time passes. But because he had pulled away from basically the entire world post blindness setting in, spending the last year of his life in his room hardly interacting with anyone, his own mother and brother barely being allowed to touch him. That for Day, his sense of touch is absolutely frantic. Which is why it’s so important for Mhok to constantly place his hands on him, not only to help lead him back into the world but to allow Day to recognize him by touch alone. And it’s being shown that he is, Day already knows Mhok’s voice and it’s touched a bit on the way he smells (ciggs) but this last episode is really starting to show how the touch of people is starting to fully affect Day, especially when he’s out of the house and how Mhok is instantly recognized even though he always follows up his touch with a vocal confirmation that it is in fact him that is touching Day.
So that hand stroking scene, the way Mhok runs the pads of his fingers gently up the centre of Day’s palm, how he strokes the back of his hand like it’s a kitten. That right there could genuinely feel like sex to Day, if not sexual in manner at the very least. The fuzzy look Day gets in his eyes, going from blank, to blissful to bashful and then finally awkward. It wasn’t just because of the fact that the dude he lowkey is starting to have a crush on is rubbing his hand in what I’m seeing being called a ‘weirdly intimate way’. It’s because Day’s body and brain is reacting to that touch in a way that people with all five senses might not completely comprehend, imagine your most intense erogenous zone (btw the palms of the hands are occasionally considered one) now imagine if that intensity was ramped up by ten, or twenty or even fifty and then imagine that that erogenous zone was suddenly everywhere. The most innocuous part of your body could bring you the most incredible sensations, both sexual and emotional, that’s what Day is feeling.
Mhok, now Mhok, he’s not stupid. Far from it in fact, he’s clued in on that not only is Day queer but also that he has a bit of a crush on him. Mhok has also quickly adapted to how he needs to teach Day to see the world in a new way, hence all the touching and smelling and reinforcement that Day can in fact do things for himself, including asking for help when he needs it. So Mhok knew exactly what he was doing with the hand rubbing, sort of. Did he know the sensation would be heightened, my best bet is totally. But did he expect to have his reaction to it go beyond that of teasing? Given his own bashfulness, doubtful. When you’re dating someone with a loss of one or many senses, you tend to change your own preconceived notions of what intimacy with your partner is. For some people offering a foot rub to their partner is a clear come on, an offer for something to lead to more. But for a blind person, especially a newly blind person like Day. They use their hands to navigate their entire world - you literally read with your fingers - so a blind persons hands are basically their most important tools in a lot of ways. To have someone touch your hands with such care, such reverence, it’s not just intimate, it’s full on foreplay.
Mhok wasn’t just touching Day, he was touching Day. It was meant to be seen as intimate because it was intimate, so intimate, in a way I don’t think either Mhok nor Day were expecting it to be because neither had ever experienced something like that before. That scene was truly the beginning of their relationship shifting, that hand scene was kind of like their first kiss.
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Gifs by @wanderlust-in-my-soul
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omegalomania ¡ 1 year ago
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ok listen obviously like everyone else i am Fucking Devastated but the fucking sHRIMPLICATIONS here are KILLING me.
the two last "new" songs we got before the hiatus were alpha dog and from now on we are enemies (equally fucked up song btw) and pete namedrops alpha dog as the last song they wrote before the hiatus and it's such a. it's SUCH a fucking. augh.
like it's so painfully and clearly a farewell. the lyrics all telegraph it. your time has passed. never means forever. walk off into the sunset. the discussion of how much effort is required to maintain this life and how they already feel burned out, past their prime when they were all in their mid-twenties and early thirties. and the sheer fucking POETRY of the way it was the last song they recorded - tell rock and roll i'm alone again - until they announced their triumphant return with save rock and roll in 2013. welcome to the new dĂŠjĂ  vu.
and oh yeah the last word issued in the song's studio version is the word "abracadabra," which pete cites as the word that christian bales character in the film “the prestige” says he will utter before he disappears from prison. "abracadabra" was a key word in the viral ARG-esque marketing campaign leading up to the release of believers never die...right before fall out boy seemingly vanished off the very face of the earth.
and, OH YEAH, the first shows they played after reuniting involved a multi-song medley spanning all the stages of their career, with one of those songs being the first time they ever played alpha dog, albeit partially.
the notion of the wizard through the curtain speaking to a sense of bitterness (at least if pete's ten year old genius annotation is anything to go by) which is the exact same phrasing to the way joe would later talk about the band's fraught, strained feelings leading up to the hiatus in a podcast with kerrang while promoting his book.
many people have pointed out the parallels between flu game and alpha dog - the way they both discuss the exhaustion of being so visible and constantly putting yourself out there and how taxing that is, especially when you're simultaneously trying to cover up how hard it is. how isolating it is, when the whole world is squinting against the starlight feathering off you. it's worth noting that these parallels are not merely implicit, either. "flu game" is in and of itself an explicit reference to a famous game michael jordan played while sick in which he claimed that he didn't want to give up, no matter how sick and tired he was. and how did pete annotate a specific couplet, ten years ago?
we must make it hard to look so easy doing something so hard
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another explicit reference to michael jordan, years and years prior.
and this is the first time they've ever played alpha dog in full. nearly 15 full years after the hiatus started. by now, fall out boy have been together for far longer than they've ever been apart. by now, fall out boy has been in their "posthiatus" era for longer than they have their "prehiatus" one.
i dont really have a conclusion to this. just, i dunno man. something about the repeated lyric "never means forever" on a greatest hits compilation titled "believers never die." something about i'm a star vs. so much for stardust vs. no more stardust. something about motifs that span decades, that span years of hurt and cracked-open wounds that have now been poured over with liquid gold, mending them anew. something about reclaiming old scars and ugly histories and reforging them into something filled with streaming starlight and sun-drenched smiles.
abracadabra.
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