#these two are so special to me. they mean everything
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Forced Heat [Fem Chubby Bunny Reader] {Smut + Fluff}
Image from Pinterest by: Ti✦na
CW: Breeding
Not Proofread
You're a bunny hybrid, the last of your kind and through the time in imprisonment in this laboratory you were cautious of everything that did. The food they gave you, the stares, the tests. Everything freaked you out. It took a long while for you to get used to your new living conditions. The scientist in charge made sure to give you a habitat that suited to your needs instead of putting you in a cell since you were the last of your species so they made sure to take extra special care of you. So why did they think to pair you with a predator species that was the last thing you wanted and apparently he felt the same way. “Why am I paired up with this inferior creature?” The wolf hybrid snarled at the scientist. You could only frown at his harsh words. His words stung just because you were a prey species doesn’t mean you are less important than the predators. “We are trying to see if you two are compatible Matias. Don’t make this any harder than it has to be.” One of the scientists warned him. Matias huffs in annoyance as he stares at you.
He sits down on the opposite of you in the tiny cell they put both of you in. “So what’s special that they had to pair me up with a small and chubby thing like you?” Matias said as he scrutinized you harshly. “Beats me.. I don’t want to be here any more than you do so please can we get this done.” You tried extending an olive branch to him. “Fine but we somehow are compatible enough to be mates. I don't want to hear any complaints from you.” Matias said with harsh glare. “So what’s your name, little bunny?” “[Y/N], My name is [Y/N]..” You told him with an unreadable expression. “[Y/N]” He took a second to digest the information. “It seems to fit you nicely. Yeah, I like that name.” Matias said as his lips slightly twitched upwards. Your eyes raked over his body. He was fit and lean, he didn’t have too much muscle which was good but he also had a lot of scars. “I’m guessing you're a warrior? Judging from his scars.” You asked him with curiosity. His gaze seemed to harden once you spoke about his scars. Your eyes widen in slight panic from his reaction. Matias then let out a sigh. “Yes, I was one of the warriors of my clan. All my scars came from different battles.” He informed you. As he starts to ramble about his scars you choose to get closer to him. He continued to talk and talk until you made it to the other side and sat beside him.
You then grabbed his hand and when you did that seemed to grab his attention. You pressed soft kisses to his scarred hand. You could feel him tense up but he didn’t pull his hand away. A soft ding noise echoed through the room. The scientists then entered the room with clipboards in hand. “Congrats you two. You both are compatible to be mates.” One of the male scientists with a sly smirk. Matias wrapped an arm around your plush waist signaling the male scientist to watch his words. “Alright, I see you're already getting protective of her.” He said with a chuckle. “Alright, guards take them back to their rooms.” The other scientist called for the guards.As the guards escorted both you and Matias back to your room you gave him a small reassuring smile. He saw it and couldn’t help but smile back.
As time went on the scientist found that you and Matias were the best fit for each well and mostly because once two hybrids mate they won’t be compatible with anyone else. So one day they decided to do a specific test only with you and not Matias. “It’s just some medicine [Y/N] relax.” The scientist said in a reassuring tone as she held up a syringe. Although it didn’t look like medicine, you'd rather obey than go without dinner again. So you lifted your arm and let them stick the needle inside of you. They injected the “medicine” and it didn’t seem to take effect immediately you sighed thankfully. You were free to go back to your room but as you were escorted back to your room you couldn’t help but feel your body heat up.
Whatever they gave you it made you go into your heat faster than anticipated so you were humping anything you got your hands on.. Anything to make the aching feeling in your cunt go away but nothing seemed to be working. You whined in pain as you humped the pillow that was drenched in your slick. “Get her mate, we have enough data and she looks like she needs him.” One of the scientists told the guards. Soon you heard the door to your habitat open and you saw your mate and he looked beyond worried. “Pumpkin, I’m so sorry.. Here let me help you.” Matias said as he unzipped his pants and freed his cock. He took the pillow away from you and flipped you onto your back. He positions you into a mating press as he aligns his cock into your dripping sex. He hissed as he pushed himself into you. You could only groan as you wrapped your legs around him to pull him in deeper. Once fully inside you he started at a slow pace but then gradually sped up. “Gonna give you some pups but first gotta take care of my baby.” He cooed as he kissed your soft plump cheek. “God my baby is so perfect..” Matias whined as he felt you clench around him. “Focus on my cock honey, focus on how it fills you nicely and perfectly.” He encouraged you as he thrusted roughly instead of you causing you to cry out in pleasure. The sound of other hybrids in contaminate cheered Matias on as he continued to help you with your forced heat cycle.
Matias feels you tighten around him, he bites back a groan and he thrusts one last time before he paints your walls white, he orgasm triggers your own and you moan out his name as you creamed around his knotted cock. You start to whine as you feel the base of his cock start to swell inside of you. ”I know.. I know sweetheart this is just to help you a little bit more.” He reassured you as he nuzzled his face into your face as he inhaled your sweet scent. Your body trembles as it slowly gets used to the stretch. After a few mins Matias’s knot swells down and he pulls out of you. You sighed in content as you felt his strong arms wrap around your chubby body. You felt him rub his hand over your chubby tummy. “Can’t wait to see your belly swell up with our pups.” He said affectionately as looked into your eyes. “I’ll protect you and our babies. I promise my love.” He said as he pressed his lips against yours. “I love you” He whispers against your lips.
Image from Pinterest by: Grafik Dizayn
#chubby reader#fem reader#female reader#x reader#monster lover#monster smut#monster oc#monster fucker#monster boyfriend#fat reader#chubby!reader#bunny hybrid!reader#bunny hybrid smut#wolf hybrid smut#wolf hybrid#bunny hybrid#wolf hybrid bf#plus sized reader#monster x female#monster x reader#monster boy#monster boy oc
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this piece is based off this post, which you can find here. I had heard it as an audio at first actually and fell in love with it. it's kind of essential for this read. it's basically talking about how before their loved one guessed their favorite color was yellow, they didn't have one. after that, yellow was special! sooo cute and i though luci fit in perfectly as the speaker!!! if you were tuned yesterday for my solomon birthmarks fic, this is two out of my four ideas! i had one more in my drafts that i decided to throw in for fun
so so excited to write this. so fluffy!!!
the color of happiness
"Don't forget about your coffee, Mc." Lucifer nudged the cup towards you, acting as a gentle reminder of it's existance.
"Right, right. Just let me finish this thought." You were laser focused on the paper you were in the middle of planning. You were desperate to get all the thoughts out before you inevitable got distracted and forgot everything.
"I don't mean to dissuade you from your schoolwork, but it's getting cold." He chuckled at your half assed attempt to wave him off.
"You can just reheat it with magic." You stuck out your tongue ever so slightly as you scribbled.
"And what if I can't?" Lucifer was practically enchanted with your little mannerisms.
"You can and would. I know you. You'd find a way to make it happen for me." Despite how smug you sounded, he knew you were right. He'd jump through however many hoops as he had to for you.
There was no coming back from your words, so he went back to his own work. By the time he'd restarted, you'd stopped for a break, and were ready to bug him.
"On that note, I feel like I know so much about you, yet so little at the same time." You held the mug in one hand, the other underneath your chin as you gazed up at him.
"What prompted this?" Lucifer set down his pen despite just having gotten back to work. He'd felt like the two of you knew each other quite well. You'd been through thick and thin together, even defied death at each others side.
"Let's play twenty-one questions!" You ignored his question. Perhaps you just wanted an excuse to hear his voice.
"Alright. I can't say I've played before, but I know of it." He found himself smiling again, as he often did around you.
"It's easy! We just ask each other questions to get to know each other better."
"Which one of your brothers is your favorite?" You asked. He hadn't been expecting such a hard hitter of a question at first
"Must I answer?" He joked.
"Come on! Alright, then which do you hate the least?" You suppressed laughter.
"Do not shout this from the rooftops, but, Mammon." He already knew how'd you'd react, but he still found himself amused when you inevitably did.
"I knew it!" You celebrated, throwing your arms in the air. "Alright, your turn."
He absentmindedly messed with his gloves. "What is your favorite part of human world?" Lucifer had thought hard about that question. You seemed too enthusiastic about the entire thing, and he couldn't help but cave.
"That's an easy one! The sunrise. I would almost never wake up in time for it, but it's so beautiful." Your eyes sparkled. He made a mental note to plan a surprise trip to the human world for you. "I've actually been dying to know the answer to this next question for a while now."
"Oh? Ask away then." Lucifer was curious. There was a lot a human could want to ask the Lucifer Morningstar. You already knew his story, but there was a lot to be asked about what the Celestial Realm was like, or what having his power was like. But instead you asked him,
"What's your favorite color?"
The question hit him like a shot to the heart. He should've known you weren't interested in anything but him, for who he was. For once, he didn't know the answer a question as simple as that. He'd never really given it though. Maybe it was red? It was the color of his eyes, and the color of Diavolo. Maybe it was blue? That was the color of his sin. Maybe it was black? Everything he bought seemed to be in that color. Or, just maybe, it was that he didn't have one.
He floundered, his thoughts much more chaotic than what he let on. "Oh, wait! Let me guess!" He nodded, despite not knowing how he'd respond. You pursed your lips, deep in thought, when you burst out with what you thought was the answer.
"Yellow! It's yellow!" You placed a hand on his arm, eagerly awaiting his answer. You looked so full of joy, that somehow, made the answer seem correct to him.
"You're right." Lucifer nodded his head in confirmation.
"Knew it!" You threw your arms around him, pulling him into a side hug. After the inital shock, he hugged you back. "Yellow was already the best color, but now it's even better since it's your favorite too." The rest of your game, and break flew by.
But he couldn't stop thinking about what had happened. How could he had been so blind to a color he saw everyday? After that, the color held a special meaning to him. Not only was it the color of his favorite brother, and the color of your favorite thing about the human world, it was also the color of you to him.
Yellow was never the same after that.
The runny yellow yolk of the sunny side up eggs tasted that little bit better. He wasn't upset when he saw a yellow ball of yarn roll out from Satan's room. The yellow umbrella you carried around always caught his eyes, and so did yellow devildom equivalent of roses he passed every day on his way to RAD in a way they hadn't before. He promptly bought them and presented them to you when you arrived after him. The smile you gave him and the way you buried your face in the flowers meant the world to him.
Yellow suited you.
#gn reader#drabble#obey me#obey me!#obey me x reader#obey me lucifer#omswd#obey me! shall we date#obey me! shall we date?
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Thinking about Zayne
Something that always intrigues me about Zayne is the fact that so far, he is the only love interest who canonically has more than one variation of him existing at the same time.
Like maybe I’m over analysing but bear with me here-
- Xavier doesn’t have incarnations as such, he is over 200 years old himself so he has experienced everything we know about him so far in one single lifetime. He has been with multiple versions of MC, but he hasn’t forgotten anything, because he’s the ONLY version of himself we know of so far (Xavier girlies if I’m wrong feel free to correct me)
- Rafayel has had many reincarnations and lifetimes with several MCs, but he remembers every one of them. However, he has single-handedly been the god of sea, abysswalker, and the other lifetimes in his memories that we have had a glimpse at. What’s important to note is that he has died and been reincarnated. Two versions of him didn’t exist at the same time.
- Now we don’t really know much about Sylus, but from what we have gathered from his memories so far, he has definitely died in one lifetime or more, and MC has been there to witness it. He obviously knows way more about MC, because like every other love interest he too had a history with her. However, I doubt there have been any indications so far of there being another version of him out there somewhere.
However, Zayne is a special case.
First and foremost, Dawnbreaker’s existence in itself is the weirdest thing ever. How is it that he exists in an alternate universe, one which is set in the future technically speaking, but both Dawnbreaker and Zayne know about each other and Dawnbreaker once even managed to very briefly take over Doctor Zayne’s consciousness, leading MC to say the infamous line “You’re not Dr. Zayne. Who are you?”
They exist at the same time which is really very interesting to me because their worlds are so drastically different from each other’s.
Then we have Foreseer. As Astra’s tool, he cannot die. He is sealed, perhaps in some form of never ending sleep but he can be awoken. Which is what I think Zayne tries to research about on his trips to Mt. Eternal where foreseer’s tower could be. And let’s not forget that Foreseer knew about a Zayne, as it was written in his book about botany and caring for flowers. It is also believed that Foreseer or some future version of Zayne is actually helping him find a solution to breaking Astra’s curse; even if it means that his future self will cease to exist.
And then we have Master of Fate. Now listen- he was a literal GOD. And yes ik you could say that even Rafayel as a god did die but! There was literally no hint ever that master of fate died. In fact; MC even said that as long as there is the mountain and the tree, Zayne will always be there. So even master of fate could potentially be alive.
Imagine y’all like 4 fucking Zayne’s being alive and ALL of them fall for MC. Like.
But why and how are there so many variations of him alive at the same time? Dawnbreaker’s existence puzzles me the most because he doesn’t even have any direct relation to any of this, his world is totally different. And the amount of emphasis on him is also very sus.
I swear if even one of them dies I’m throwing hands at INFOLD!😭
Anyway I’d love to know your thoughts about this so feel free to lemme know in the comments, and please do fill me in if I’m missing something!🫶
#love and deepspace#zayne#zayne love and deepspace#dr zayne#l&ds zayne#lads zayne#lds zayne#zayne x you#lads#lnd zayne#dawnbreaker#zayne x mc#doctor zayne#foreseer#master of fate
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some brilliant minds 1x08 thoughts; spoilers within so proceed on your own judgement
those two nerds are so into each other and it's so loud also CAROL IMMEDIATELY CLOCKING THEM
josh like pls don't put me in the middle of your feud but then when oliver leaves he whips his head around like WAIT I DIDN'T MEAN GO THOUGH
"I am sorry to report that you have... a twinkle in your eyes" ANGEL
I know it's not the time or whatever but muriel is so hot
carol get behind me I will protect you
at this point their little last name thing is basically foreplay and the way we will get them saying each others first names in a moment of extreme intimacy I'm so ready
"when we're tog- when we're on a case together I need open channels of communication"
THESE NERDS ARE SO FUCKING HORNY FOR EACH OTHER
they are frantic in a way that tells me the sex is fucking feral
this lady's sons SUCK also yes jacob you stand up for that woman's sex positivity
this lunch date has everything. giggling. genuine admiration. nerding out together. roasting. flirting.
heartbeats being the romantic soundtrack to this episode is A Lot
carol get behind me and dana we will protect you
josh trying to impress oliver with his military man intimidation tactics AND IT WORKS?
also they are 100% that couple that just looks at each other a little too long or flirts a little too close to the sun and then suddenly they're trying to eat each other in a room full of people
CAROL GET BEHIND ME DANA AND OLIVER WE WILL PROTECT YOU
"I don't want that for you" with tears in his eyes my god i love them
"just don't hurt him" and you can see josh start to panic like oh god I will and I don't even think he cares about how awkward it would be professionally but he cares about oliver and he feels it in that moment that oliver's heart is something special, oliver is something special and for anyone else this could be casual but he knows for them it's not
josh DEVASTATED that oliver let it go without a fight. he wanted to walk in there and be told in no uncertain terms that he was being ridiculous. he wanted oliver to call him on his bullshit, to get under his skin the way only he can. and the one time he finally concedes, defers, even though it's obvious that he's just going along and josh hates it and he wants to take it all back so bad
CAROL NOOOOOOO
dana giving june a sex toy just incredible and I love her so much
old people throuple diversity win
I didn't need protection, I needed LOVE. and he's talking about after his dad died but he's also talking about now. he's also talking about how happy he is with josh and how they could love each other if they let themselves
I just know sex with van is INSANE imagine the giver that man is when he can also feel the pleasure his partner is feeling
our odds are 60/40 but you've proven me wrong before. and heartbeats fading in. and someone is choosing oliver even though it won't be easy, and pain is inevitable but so is joy and this could be it and they both know it
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no funny video for this games birthday, mostly because i dont have time, but also because this game just. means more to me compared to the first game lol
gonna put my sappy rant under the Keep Reading button. again
picture this: youre Me, an 8 year old child. its the start of 2015. unsure of the exact day or month but it was 100% before March. Wednesday, the day that my dad takes my brother to therapy while mom stays at home with me. mom is taking a nap on your room, as she usually does. youre in the living room, tablet in hand with a couple of small baskets full of pony and various animal toys. you open google, not remembering what you were going to search in the first place. an article title catches your attention.
"Infamous Horror Indie Game, Five Nights At Freddy's, Gets A Long Awaited Sequel."
you blink, not knowing what that game even is. you, instead of searching on google or even on youtube what fnaf is, you decide to go to the tablets play store and download the game yourself. the first game isnt free and you know youre not allowed to buy games, so you go and download the free demo of Five Nights At Freddy's 2.
you grab your moms old shitty phone and two ponies, an official Rarity and a McDonald's glowy Applejack and start recording your tablet with the two ponies in front, acting like theyre playing and reacting to what happens in game. due to you being only 8 years old, you dont understand what any of the texts or what the weird guy talking on the non visible phone is saying, thanks to english not being your first language. you tap everything, and once finding the cameras, you flinch and leave in fear when you go to Cam 11, the Prize Corner, where the music box plays.
a few minutes later, theres a warning symbol flashing in the corner. you freak out, you fumble, checking the vents, checking the hallway, putting on the mask. it eventually stops. in the background you can hear a faint music box version of the song Pop Goes The Weasel playing, but due to your talking you dont hear it. you then get jumpscared by The Puppet. you scream, it was a genuine scream. you feel your eyes tearing up and your heartbeat increase. you shake it out, acting like the ponies fainted as they complain about the game being too scary for them. you stop recording and move on with your day.
when bedtime comes, you start struggling to sleep. whenever you close your eyes, you can see the puppets face close to yours, and whenever you fall asleep, the face appears in your dreams, scaring you awake. this keeps going for days, maybe even a full week. you decide to try the game again, as well as search for any videos of the game. as much as youre scared, you start to be fascinated by the games, the characters, the stories. you start looking at fanart, tracing any ones you like and taking them to school, and to your surprise a few of your classmates are familiar and even Like fnaf. you start making fanart yourself, doing crossovers with mlp and fnaf, drawing ships, drawing mmd model designs on the characters. you watch countless videos, ranging from gameplays to gmod gameplays to sfm and 2d animations to mmd dancing videos to animation memes to tributes to character theme songs to headcanon voices.
the reason i draw and post my art online is thanks to this game franchise. the reason i have some of my friends is thanks to this game franchise. in reality i should be thanking the first game, but the second is So special to me. its the one i first saw, first played, first saw discussion and theories of. i was there when people were playing the trailer backwards, hearing withered foxy scream Freedom, and hearing Mike Kill All during the end of the reversed trailer. i was there when people were freaking out over the teasers, calling the Toy Animatronics as [insert fnaf character name here] 2.0. i was there when people were debating toy bonnies, mangles and the puppets gender. i was there when such iconic songs like It's Been So Long by The Living Tombstone, Five Nights At Freddy's Pt 2 by SayMaxWell, The Puppet Song by Tryhardninja, all of the [insert fnaf character name here] song by Groundbreaking, Five More Nights by JT Music, Mangled by NateWantsToBattle, and so so many more. i was there when the iconic Tony Crynight series came out.
so as much as i thank the first game for existing, i thank the second game so much more. the puppet is my favorite character for a reason (even tho it is tied with ennard lol) and the second game is my favorite for the same reason.
anyways, enough yapping. yes im gonna wish every character a happy birthday again.
happy birthday to Toy Freddy, Toy Bonnie, Toy Chica, Mangle, The Puppet, Balloon Boy, Withered Freddy, Withered Bonnie, Withered Chica, Withered Foxy, Golden Freddy, Jeremy Fitzgerald, Fritz Smith, Shadow Freddy, Shadow Bonnie, JJ and Purple Guy. happy 10 years of Five Nights At Freddy's 2.
#aaawic#fnaf 2#five nights at freddy's 2#fnaf 2 art#five nights at freddy's 2 art#fnaf 2 fanart#five nights at freddy's 2 fanart#the puppet#the marionette#fnaf puppet#fnaf marionette#charlie emily#charlotte emily#happy 10th year fnaf 2
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I love this episode so much. It has given me the line that is keeping me sane in all this dooming darkness surrounding what happened to Cheng Xiaoshi: even if you can't see hope, doesn't mean there is no hope.
And you kinda reinforced this by pointing out how the girls mirror them. I really hope you're right about this and that Lu Guang will succeed in his plans of saving him.
I think it also allows us a glimpse into the future because I'm pretty sure there WILL be a fallout between those two once Cheng Xiaoshi finds out what Lu Guang has been doing. We all know he would hate that. He is such a highly empathic guy and he seems to value everyone else more than himself (shown not only by him trying again and again to change the past to help people, regardless if it might erase his future. Because he KNOWS that, has been hearing it from Lu Guang since the beginning. And he only actually realises what this is doing when it's not his life being changed by his doing, but Emma's... but it's also shown in a more obvious way by him LITERALLY STEPPING IN FRONT OF QIAN JIN'S GUN TO PROTECT SOMEONE ELSE. Not once. SEVERAL TIMES. And only one time to protect Qiao Ling, the other times he was staying between QJ and Lu Tianxi, who had until shortly before that been working against them. That guy has no sense of self-preservation, I swear!)
Where was I.
He's empathetic and selfless, and I just know he will hate that Lu Guang put him over everyone else. Because why him, what makes him more special or better than anyone else?
So they will have their fallout, I'm sure about that, and I'm also sure that they'll find their way back to each other like the girls.
The damn noodle lesbians are singlehandedly keeping my hopes up for a happy ending for these two, since everything else about this damn show seems to make me want to throw hands and give into despair 😭💔
Rewatching Link Click: Easter eggs in your noodle soup?
So I've just finished watching both seasons of Link Click/Shíguāng Dàilǐ-rén, which means that obviously I'm watching it all over again. What did you expect me to do, sit around waiting for Bridon arc while the Bilibili official account taunts us with replays??
Besides, Link Click is one of those dishes that is best served twice. The early episodes are packed with hints and foreshadowing that only become clear once you've gotten up to date, so I've made it my mission to catch 'em all.
You don't say.
It's well known that certain early mini-arcs (for instance Chen Xiao's basketball match, and Doudou's kidnapping) have implications for the larger plotline or at least contain important exposition/character insights that the story would not feel complete without. There are also several that get written off as filler, or are generally considered to not have any purpose beyond familiarising the audience with the characters and setup, and lulling you into a false sense of comfort before everything goes to shit. Episode 2: Secret Recipe, AKA the Noodle Lesbians episode, beloved as it is, tends to fall into the second category.
Or does it?
On a rewatch, I still don't think it does anything to advance the main plot. We don't even really know where it fits into the timeline, because we're never told what day it is and Lu Guang's watch is never shown on screen (I'll get around to a longer analysis of this another day). However, I'm instead inclined to believe that it's one of the most important episodes in the show - if not THE most important - because it's essentially an allegory for the story of Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang, and gives you a bird's eye view of how the relationship between them is going to develop - which, as you know, is what the show is all about. And the fact that it's not situated in a specific time, in a show that cares heavily about timeline construction, makes it better.
The episode starts with this quote from German photographer August Sander, who believed that, through photography, he could reveal the characteristic traits of people. "The portrait is your mirror. It's you." It's pretty explicit, when you think about it. This episode is a mirror of the entire series, specifically of its protagonists.
Moving on. The episode's storyline is quite simple: two college "roommates" start a noodle shop together, and as time passes, they drift apart and eventually fall out as their priorities change. Yu Xia, the business-oriented one between them, wants to get hold of the secret ingredient used by Lin Zhen, to whose cooking the shop attributes its success. Does Yu Xia really want to steal the secret recipe? Or is it just one of the many things that the quieter Lin Zhen keeps hidden from her that she desperately wants to know, along with everything that went wrong between them? Your guess is as good as mine. Either way, there are lots of indirect parallels between Xialin of the noodle shop and Shiguang of the photo studio, even if for now they're very distinct individuals with their own personalities and struggles. It does, however, give some indication of what's to come.
This question isn't purely rhetorical, as we find out in the very next arc, where Cheng Xiaoshi has a fight with Lu Guang over letting his client's loved ones perish in the Wenchuan earthquake. Even if they eventually come to a consensus, they have fundamentally different life philosophies and approach their missions in very different ways. Cheng Xiaoshi is a hyperempathetic idealist who keeps trying to use his forays back into the past to fix his clients' personal problems, while Lu Guang remains utterly indifferent and staunchly against interfering, even in life-or-death situations. Which turns out to be a facade, because we later learn that he's just as much of a meddler as Cheng Xiaoshi - except he's focused on a singular, selfish goal, which is to keep Cheng Xiaoshi alive at any cost.
Let's go back to the noodle shop. After ten years of running the business together, it becomes clear that the ladies' aspirations are no longer compatible. Yu Xia has big plans for the shop. She wants to broaden their customer base - for profit, of course, but also so that more people can be made happy by the chance to taste their noodles. Lin Zhen's dreams, however, are on a smaller scale - perhaps only on a personal scale. Throughout the episode, it seems that she only really cares about making noodles for one person.
Sound familiar?
At the risk of digressing, it needs to be said that Yu Xia and Lin Zhen are absolutely very much a WLW couple. This isn't bait, it's elegant and really quite unsubtle queercoding that says 'to hell with censorship' loud and clear. Honeymoon jokes, the taxi driver assuming Lin Zhen had fought with her husband, and Lin Zhen's very bold attempts at flirting... we see you.
More to the point of this post, I think it's important to point out that Lin Zhen does not actually care for too many people other than Yu Xia. She's all worn out from making noodles for customers, but she forgets all about that when it's time to make a bowl for Yu Xia. She also keeps her special ingredient - which is one of the secrets she shares with Yu Xia, as we find out - highly guarded. She's never going to let these pesky reporters in on something so intimate.
Why is this important? Because, as it turns out, the episode's storyline - and Lin Zhen's motives - are all about saving Yu Xia.
We learn that the secret ingredient is a local specialty from Yu Xia's hometown. Lin Zhen has been using it for years, keeping the taste of home alive while Yu Xia's drifted further and further from home to the point where she can no longer remember where the ingredient came from. At the end of it all, when Yu Xia returns home, she finds Lin Zhen there waiting for her. Lin Zhen, mind you, does not hail from the same town. The girls met in college. It's home to her simply because it's Yu Xia's home.
This comes directly after a pilot episode that establishes the contrast between urban isolation and rural/familial warmth, through Emma's eyes, and in a show that continually reinforces the concept of longing for home and loved ones. By forcing Yu Xia to reevaluate her priorities, Lin Zhen manages to bring her back home - which is a place that includes herself.
Perhaps it's too early to say. But to me, it's a pretty neat thematic parallel of Lu Guang's solo quest to save Cheng Xiaoshi from death; which is intertwined with a greater goal of giving Cheng Xiaoshi a home, one that is safe and secure and surrounds him with those that love him and are there to stay.
But in the process of achieving this, one of his biggest obstacles is Cheng Xiaoshi himself - his insistence on interfering with the timeline so that Lu Guang can't predict events with certainty, his objections to the way Lu Guang does things, and the definite resistance Lu Guang will come up against if Cheng Xiaoshi learns about his plan. Pretty much every minor mission they undertake is a rehash of the same argument; Cheng Xiaoshi wants to use their combined powers to make a difference to other people's lives, and Lu Guang just has one goal in mind which means that he's going to ignore absolutely everyone else.
Notice how Yu Xia's looking to the future, while Lin Zhen's dream is to go back to a point in the past? Neat.
And when they finally part ways because it's clear Yu Xia is not going to support Lin Zhen's goal? Yu Xia asks her where she's going to go after they part ways, and Lin Zhen says:
I wonder where we've heard that before.
And if you need any more proof that this episode is in fact intended to be a mirror, do consider:
Their seating positions are mirrored too. Yeeeeaaaaaahhhh.
In conclusion: if this allegory is to be believed, then trust that Lu Guang will eventually succeed in his mission and Cheng Xiaoshi will find his way home to him. It'll happen, guys. In the meantime, at least our beloved noodle ladies will be living a peaceful life out in the countryside.
Since I don't know how to shut up and this website seems to be giving me infinite space to yap, let me include some more details about this episode that I found cool. There are so many.
Lin Zhen and Lu Guang are both shown while this line is being said. What with all that the fragrant flowers represent, it makes you think about what these characters' best memories might be and how much they treasure them.
This is such a tiny detail that you'd almost definitely miss it on the first watch, and it seems insignificant - until it isn't. When Cheng Xiaoshi hops into the girls' picture taken during their college days, he screws up and suggests they'd be better off dabbling in tech stuff like apps or intelligent management than running a noodle shop. Lu Guang makes him quickly eat his words, but they seem to have still struck a chord with Yu Xia - because later we see that she works over years to integrate an intelligent supply chain management system into their business. In fact, one of the reasons for Lin Zhen to alienate herself from the business is because she feels like it's gotten too techy and lost its human touch. Not really fair considering it was her own idea, is it?
I mean. This is probably a stretch. Digitization is pretty inevitable for big businesses nowadays, so Yu Xia, being as enterprising as she is, might have gone for it whether Lin Zhen suggested it or not. But it's interesting to think that it might be Cheng Xiaoshi's tiny alteration of the past that unfurled outwards like a hurricane from the beating of a butterfly's wing and catalysed their falling out. Especially because these kinds of bootstrap phenomena very much occur in later episodes and are a core feature of Link Click's time travel model.
Some suspicious behaviour on Lu Guang's part. He's quite certain there are no useful clues in the last picture Yu Xia and Lin Zhen took in front of their shop, despite it being the only one taken by Lin Zhen (seriously! you could go to her house, look through her phone, the possibilities are endless!) and the fact that this is the photo Cheng Xiaoshi did end up solving the mystery in, thanks to the ticket stubs he found in her purse (see?) Secondly, they outright miss a picture in the envelope - the most important picture of all which would have given them the answer right away, since this was when the fragrant flowers were first used. Not your best work, Lu Guang.
...or is it? Lu Guang is pretty meticulous, and it's unlike him to slip up in such obvious ways. He's also skilled at slipping things back into envelopes when he doesn't want them to be seen, as we know. Could it be that he didn't want Cheng Xiaoshi to solve the mystery? But why? Maybe it's metaphorical, like so much else of this episode: he doesn't want Cheng Xiaoshi to uncover his true intentions. The fact that all this is ultimately for his sake.
Interestingly, Lu Guang was very dejected at the idea of them seemingly being out of luck - they'd tried so many times and failed to fulfill the mission. Was he, perhaps, thinking about another mission he'd hate to fail? Anyway, it falls to Cheng Xiaoshi to cheer him up and give him hope for another try, which he accepts, with a small but genuine smile. My heart.
If you've scrolled this far, I'm glad you enjoyed my ramblings! I must say I don't know much about how Tumblr works so apologies if I mess up on formatting or tags, but I'll probably get the hang of it soon enough. I'll also probably end up enjoying Tumblr more than Twitter since it allows me unfettered yap space and won't feed my writing to the machine (yet). It's late and I should probably stop stop thinking bout it around now... but look forward to more random ramblings and thank you for reading!
#link click#they also mirror the name of their shop being a mix of their names 🥹#I'm soft for them#they're roommates 💕🙂↕️
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why would someone make a star trek au of their own ocs lol that's so silly.
so agent west is now lieutenant commander west, starfleet intelligence, and dr vasilevsky is now dr vaskil, biotech researcher for the obsidian order (explanation below cut)
starfleet catches wind of suspicious activity around a remote moon that just so happens to be where dr vaskil is conducting her research. west is sent in undercover as a cardassian lab technician to gather information about what they are doing. however, dr vaskil is good at what she does and recognises that west has been surgically altered, so she kidnaps her and nonconsensually reverses the surgery. vaskil inevitably plants some sort of nefarious tech inside her during the surgery that west is unaware of, and does a villain monologue while she's strapped to the table. west manages to escape, but is stranded on the moon for the time being. a game of cat and mouse ensues where the roles are constantly switching. and of course so begins the fucked up psychosexual lesbian happenings
#star trek#star trek oc#star trek ds9#cardassian oc#oc: agent west#oc: dr vasilevsky#i have no idea where exactly the starfleet intelligence uniform actually comes from i just found it on a reddit post#and cardassian fashion is just fucked up man#i also drew a sketch of them up to their usual nonsense (holding weapons to each other's throats in like a sexually charged way)#but alas i wasnt happy with it 😔 maybe ill return to it at a later date#these two are so special to me. they mean everything
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realising sevika is the best influence for jinx right now because sevika has always been a calculated yes-man. right now jinx is completely unmoored and trying to find purpose away from the voices of both silco and vi, and sevika is someone who seeks out the right people to work under, is a yes-man only if it aligns with what she thinks is right. sevika is utterly utterly perfect for helping guide jinx's destruction towards the right places, without trying to force her to do anything. now silco's gone, only those two carry the torch of his legacy - sevika knows she has no allies in the barons. but with jinx she has someone she trusts, an anchor in her grief as well as the spiralling situation and a capable one at that. sevika knows that jinx understands, and that means everything right now. jinx with sevika can find who she is without the voices, and can rely on the trust and loyalty of sevika to keep her from spiralling. she's already seen the ugly side of jinx, knows her fits and has proven that she'll push back, but not leave. jinx can trust herself through sevika. they're so perfect.
#i have so many feelings abt these two#just. the fact their grief binds them so tightly together#they dont LIKE each other but they do love each other#and thats the only thing that matters anymore#when everything else has gone to complete utter shit#its so special#they mean so much to me#sevika#jinx#arcane#arcane season 2#veran talks
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the difference between zosopp and sanuso (romantic OR platonic) is that Usopp is Zoro's specialest little guy and Zoro is someone Usopp hangs out with and looks up to and hides behind when things get scary, but Sanji and Usopp are best friends. They horse around, they beat each other up, they confide their worst fears trying to one up each other. Usopp hides behind Sanji sometimes, sure, but idk, Sanji's weaknesses are more obvious (bugs, fighting women, etc) so there are times when Usopp has to stand in front of Sanji too, yknow?
Like, how do I say this, all the crewmates are equal- Usopp and Zoro are equals- but with Sanji it feels like more... comradery? Zoro's a rock in a terrible storm- even rocks tend to get weathered and chipped and worn down, but they overall stay strong and steady. He has trouble being vulnerable and there are times when the burden he's placed on himself to keep the crew safe is crushing his chest. Usopp would help with that and be very understanding, but the point I'm trying to get with that is that those moments are few and far between. So I feel like Usopp, especially after Water 7, would take Zoro's lead on something like that, and keep most of his worries to himself or only talk about them sparingly unless they're really bad and/or he can't hide them.
Sanji is like a tree in a storm; he can be strong, yes, but it feels like he bends and sways with the storm, and has more obvious breaking points. He can relate more to Usopp's struggles rather than resorting to blunt honesty that might border on callous like Zoro. And while, with Zosopp, I tend to think of scenarios with Zoro being blunt like that as a good thing- because sometimes when you're spiraling, it's nice to have someone say exactly what's great about you and shoot down all your worries with straight facts that you can't argue with- I can also see this as being a bad thing. Anxiety can really twist up your brain sometimes, you know? And despite the words, the tone could still mess someone up if they're already feeling like a burden on others in some way.
With Sanuso it's a lot more understanding and thoughtful words. It's distractions and comfort food and patience- the kind reserved for Usopp- until Usopp talks about whatever's troubling him. Compared to Zosopp, it doesn't take as long for Usopp to open up, since he's done the same thing to Sanji at times and it's more familiar to him to talk and commiserate with Sanji about his worries and doubts and such. However, there are times stuff like this has absolutely no effect and Sanji will end up at a loss, no idea what to do or how to help over the course of several days with Usopp being quiet and keeping his distance, and he'll end up working himself up about it which will only serve to make Usopp feel worse and. yeah. bit of a vicious cycle with them.
So it's like. Usopp can be weak with both of them, but since I see Sanji as the type of guy who'd be more open with his worries (at least compared to Zoro), there's less of a need to 'perform' and be his best self around him. He's comfortable around Zoro, yes, but he is constantly wanting to show that he won't be a problem to him. On the other hand, while he's more open with Sanji, and Sanji with him, they tend to relate a bit too much with each other and they both have issues with causing trouble for others and being 'deserving of love' so failed attempts at consoling one hurts the other and creates an unpleasant cycle of misery and avoidance before some other crewmate (Zoro) tells them to quit being stupid and just fucking talk to each other.
#one piece#sanuso#zosopp#long post#nemotime#does this make sense or is this the ramblings of a person who's only got 3 hrs sleep#bc thats me. 3 hrs sleep. ugh#listen okay its like. zosopp has their own growing pains to get through yknow? zoro will eventually get the whole#'oh usopp isnt as open with me bc he wants to seem tough and is also kind of doing the same thing i do. thats bad for him'#and it'll be a whole thing about making a promise between the two of them to try and be more honest with their fears and seeking help#when they need it#the sanuso thing is like. i hope i didnt mean to make it seem like sanuso is 'better' or w/e bc its just a different thing#sanuso got their own problems to sort out. 1. Sanji's everything 2. boundaries on special treatment-#i'm not gonna go seriously into this but both relationships start out not the best and get better over time yknow#also i know usopp's afraid and freaking out a lot but for this post i meant his deeper fears and insecurities#not 'i've got can't-go-on-this-island disease' lmao#the tl;dr of this post is: Usopp is more closed off with Zosopp. Usopp and Sanji have similar issues that cause problems with Sanuso.#also the way i see these ships will probably change at some point. who knows#there was a post i saw recently that was like 'hey sanuso bc romance trio were already chill with each other so sanuso became chill with#each other in an 'alone together' type of way and also they have the same issues' and i thought 'wow so true bestie' and here we are#also. man. usopp taking on / copying the behaviours of his loved ones regardless of his age is just. my jam. in a positive or negative way#maybe i'll make a post about that explaining it more. maybe
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Silence fell between them for several reasons: From digesting the Saiyan's words cautiously to being ever mindful not to shoot a ki blast through their intruder's skull... At least not before he finishes this meal.
Had Mr. Satan spun a false tale about his battle with Cell? Honey could easily see that. After all, the mainstream media often distorts or omits key details to maintain a certain narrative, especially if it's meant to uphold the image of Earth's so-called greatest hero. Now that Goku mentioned it, she faintly remembered seeing someone in a familiar orange gi confront Cell—yet the raw footage was practically useless, marred by heavy grain, blurs, and distortion.
Any footage beyond what aired has vanished into the annals of time, fueling conspiracy theories. Many online skeptics argue the Cell Games were nothing but a charade—a ratings stunt filled with actors and special effects. Mr. Satan himself spouted such claims during the battle. Yet, reality is often stranger than fiction, especially with the living proof lurking on her property. If Cell was real, then Goku must have been entangled in that chaos from the beginning. His reaction adds up, and it makes her feel a lot worse than she already did. What kind of horrors did he witness? She almost doesn't want to know.
Honeydew nervously sipped her water, stealing a glance at her teacher where he had pointed. The Bio-android, wearing an unsettling expression, remained motionless, his silent eating adding to the tension. She couldn't help but wonder what was going through his mind. Was he holding himself back to prevent a deadly confrontation, merely tuning out of the conversation to focus on his meal, or a mix of both? For what it was worth, she had to count her blessings, meager as they were.
Upon hearing his last question, she suddenly choked on her drink, descending into a brief coughing fit as she struggled to regain composure. The question felt incredibly sudden, causing her features to redden with embarrassment as she was thrust into the limelight. This caught Cell's attention, piquing his curiosity about the nickname as well. It had been given to him within the last two months, and he hadn't bothered to ask why or correct her. He had simply adjusted to it, assuming it was just a folksy way of referring to things. Her reaction suggested there was more to it, furrowing his brow.
"...Err... Well, yes, it's a nickname," she hesitates, unsure of where to look with both of them burning their gaze right through her. "I-I mean, when you spend time with someone, these things happen eventually, right? 'Slick' is used to describe someone cunning, silver-tongued—It's just what fits that line of thought. I didn't plan it out or anything, it came to me."
A half-truth, he thought. Cell couldn't explain it, but there was an underlying glint in her eye. She was omitting information from him specifically, not just because the monkey-man was seated across the table. She was a terrible liar, but in this instance, that could be easily taken as gospel to the untrained observer. He wrestled with understanding what went on in that country-bumpkin brain, becoming more openly fixated on his student. Notably, he's stopped eating.
The air just became all the more dense, and this motivates Honeydew to switch gears and get off the subject immediately.
"G-Goku, listen, I can't even begin to fathom how deep the rabbit hole goes. Facts from fiction, truths and lies. I understand you have yer discrepancies with him, I can't blame you. I very much relate with the sentiment."
"However... I strongly oppose your intentions. There is also much you don’t know about me, about him, and what we’ve done here. I won’t give that up, even if you told me everything. It’s a complicated situation, most of which isn’t your business to know. I can only answer what I can, and surely you understand. But you have my word that nothing will happen to Earth."
He's taken a seat, tail wrapped firmly around his own waist as memories play in his mind, he's seated only a few feet away from the same enemy that not only cost him his life, caused his boy to have to fight a battle that he never wanted him to, that persisted even after he sacrificed himself in an attempt to save not just his friends and family but the earth itself. Then it was all wrapped up into a story for the public by Mr.Satan. So many left in the dark, to true horrors that had happened, nearly happened and so much more. He supposes he should have seen something like this happening, if Frieza had the capacity to be brought back why not Cell? How many of his past enemies would come crawling out of hell just because it could happen?
His gaze is cold, lacking it's usual warmth. Many times people have commented on his naivety, his good nature, his willingness for mercy and yet almost every time he's ever shown it, somehow, someway, it gets stepped on and dragged into the dirt. So many times his family, his friends, earth and her people have suffered because of it. It was easy to be evil, harder to be good. The memories burn in the edges of his mind. Helpless, trapped beneath the bio android's foot and stuck watching his son being crushed within arms that only seek to maim. A father forced to watch as his son had to pick up where he left off, had to take on a burden he never wanted him to carry.
The food smells amazing, but he doesn't have the stomach for it. Not in this moment. The dark thoughts keep persisting and he's ready to simply let rage guide him. But for now the only thing holding him back is that the other is currently behaving, how long until that stops? He's not sure. He doesn't want to find out, he's not tempted to incite karma especially with someone like cell. Even still...amnesia huh?
"Unless you were there that day, you don't know the full story besides what Mr.Satan told the world." It's quiet, bitterness in it which speaks volumes on his statement of it.
"You say you've got your own agenda to settle, that I can understand but you don't know my story either. And you can't guarantee me it'll stay that way." Finger tapping on the table before he gestures to the Bio-Android, tilting his head slightly, there's still the low growl in the depths of his voice, unintentional but simply showing how much rage was being repressed. "Why do you call him Slick? A nickname?" The edges of his nails digging into wood, it takes much more restraint that he is currently straining for to keep even remotely calm.
#《🌊》𝑺𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝑺𝒉𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒔 [closed rp]#kxkarot#//This is becoming the longest rp thread i've written in ages#//feels good tbh
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is this where u take the requests? if not, apologies lol still learning tumblr, I WAS WONDERING IF MY VARGAS RELATED REQUESTOBER REQUEST COULD BE JAKE/NNY? i feel like jake/nny is SO looked past like its actually so cute, they could be doing anything THANK U IF THIS WAS THE WRONG PLACE SORRY MWAH MWAH X
Day 12 - Once you had one hole in your skin, you've had 'em all
#My art#Requestober#Vargas#Jake#Nny#*looks at your comment of NnyGaster being cursed* *looks at this* Well I mean at least you're consistent#Of all the crackships I haven't considered I possibly haven't considered this one the most#I mean considering I Just got into Nny/Scriabin lol#I have extreme Edgar/Scriabin blinders lol this is known#Is this a thing and I just don't know? I can't even snark I just - it Literally Never Occurred to me lol#Edgar got all the shipping charts and diagrams and graphs he's special that way <3#I love Jake dearly and don't want him to be hurt! Unlike the Vargases lol ♥ I love them dearly and Do want them be hurt#Precarious position anyone who gets paired up with Johnny haha#I suppose if Johnny's still in Sweet Mode that's one thing but!! the rest of him!!!#Their dynamic over something like piercings Is interesting tho - Jake hangs out with artsy types and Nny is definitely that lol#And Johnny's y'know - weird about stuff lol - I could see him getting into a pierced partner! No pun intended#And obviously Jake is very good on boundaries <3 He's not actually touching him here just gesturing at his ear#It also occurs to me that I can't think of a time I've seen Johnny with tattoos :0 Body modification+art! (+bodily weirdness)#Might be something there to look at sometime hmmm#Anyhow - continuing my trend of drawing Nny on the hood of the car over the cliff haha#I didn't think I had leveled up all that much from last year but comparing the two??? I'm Way more pleased with this one#Still struggling with the bottom of the shoe but better! Practicing!!!#Maybe there Is something to drawing just a bit bigger lol#Nny also looks significantly less anemic from not having died yet lol#Really pleased with the harder edges of the unlined shapes ♪ I used that grass brush on everything and it's dope#Do I like backgrounds???? First lining now this so much to consider
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Movie!Tails 🤝 Nine
Getting all 😳😊 when Sonic says that he considers them a friend
#sonic the hedgehog#sontails#sonine#unbreakable bond#miles tails prower#tails the fox#sonic prime#sonic wachowski#miles nine prower#nine sonic prime#nine the fox#i just be ramblin#If you know you know#The scene with Nine gets me because Sonic is like 'Only a true friend could pull off a save like that'#and Nine STUTTERS. He's like ''Friend? We're f-friends?'' all airy like and smiling like he's not sure he can believe it#And then later Sonic's like 'Mess with my best bud and you get blasted!'#And it's like the first time Sonic's referred to Nine as a best friend of his so Nine gets this soft heartfelt smile like it was touching😭#And then the scene from Sonic movie 2 man#Tails is like 'Do you really mean that? About me being your pal?'#and he places his hand over his own heart and everything‚ smiling like the implication is just touching#and Sonic's like 'Of course‚ buddy' and Tails smiles even bigger and just hugs him#Gaaaaaaaaaah they just they just get me#I spent a lot of time in the S0riku trenches in my youth waxing poetry about Riku’s feelings and like#Nine and movie Tails' reactions to being considered friends or best friends to Sonic speaks to that part of me#(that part of me who used to wax poetry about Riku not being able to believe that Sora still considers him a best friend‚ much less anythin#else he'd want the two of them to be)#And Nine specifically‚ he wants to be someone special and irreplaceable for Sonic. So especially when Sonic calls him 'best bud'‚ I think i#allows him to believe for a moment that his dream is possible and that Sonic would choose to live in a world of their own making with him
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"We're the same age duo, thank you for having us!"
#fantastics from exile tribe#fantastics#kimura keito#nakajima sota#jr exile#jpop#hkgifs#けとそた#hehe count this as my bday post for fanta twin day#no giftset has ever come together so fast my ketosota vault is DEEP#my perfect beautiful twins thank you for everything that you are 💕#i cannot express what the two of you mean to me but please never change❤️#one last happy fanta twin day to you all!!!#one day of spam remains wwww#but only the usual bday amount today was a lot bc it was the most special hehe
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[ id: drawings featuring three object head characters: Aloe, a curvy adult with brown skin and a lava lamp for a head, Petra, a taller fat adult with brown skin and a cactus for a head, and Shelby, a small baby with light-brown skin and a fishbowl head. in the first image Aloe is tenderly holding a 4 month old sleeping Shelby in her arms. next, Shelby is shown at 6 months old, sitting up by herself, sticking her tongue out. then, Petra is spoon feeding her while she sits in a high chair, at 8 months old. in the second image, Shelby at 10 months old is standing & takes a small step forward, looking up enthusiastically. Petra and Aloe beside each other react with loving awe; Petra, with teary eyes raise their hands to their mouth, and Aloe gently touches Petra's arm. the words "first steps!" is written in all caps. end id ]
baby momence <3
#my ocs#object head#Aloe#Petra#Shelby#waaaaah theyre so special to meee.. ;__; thinking about them makes me so emotional i know i say that abt everything but i mean it every tim#i always had Shelby's lil seaweed hair bits as clip ons but i think itd be cute if it also grew with her!#so a bit of backstory abt these two:#they were never a couple in the romantic sense;they were strangers& spent one night together & went seperate ways & didnt have any contact#w/each other until after Shelby ws born. Petra wanted to be a part of their lives and they decide to work things out together#theyre still not romantically involved but they are partners! co parents! a qpr is the most consise way to describe them if i had to#just. they love each other they love being parents and they are a fambilyyyy ;_______; 💞#im so ljfsajiehilksn ougggghtalsf I LUV THEM SO MUCH....... gwahg my honeys..#also this is placed soon after Petra's injury &their scars are still fresh i normally draw them well after the fact when theyre more healed
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went to see godzilla!! i was so wired from happiness and excitement that i was milimeters from buying a ticket to the second showing thats gonna start in 20mins
#godzilla has been a special interest since i was a kid#peak reason why i wonder we didnt find out i was autistic as a kid JSJSJSJSJSJS#she means so much to me. im sooooolll#im!!! emotional. probably gonna pass out and sleep for two hours when i get home#IM GONNA MAKE A PIECE ABT THIS W IWAIZUMI TRUST!!!!#i remember not thibking much of iwa in the beginning. then learning he loved godzilla#evERYTHING CHABGED LMAO#sorry for ranting like this im just so !!! WAAAAAAAA#nohr.txt
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so many things happening in my life in the next couple months and it feels like my life is turning around compared to how I felt this time last year which was complete and utter dread and burn out in every sense of the word
#ME WHEN I GIVE MYSELF MORE SPACE AND TIME TO HEAL AND BE OKAY AFTER A SCHOOL YEAR#there are several factors as to why i don't feel like the human-ish equivalent of the swamp monster#mostly though it's because I'm going into homeschooling so the overwhelming fear of the next school year and all the expectations and#running around and will i get a good teacher and do i have to change my schedule and oh god am i gonna be able to get my 504 in check and#are my teachers even going to follow it and all of that isn't present#I'm gonna meet my teacher here soon and i she's a special ed teacher and i won't have to run between classes#or worry about my principal suddenly making a rule that we can't go to the bathrooms during class hours#and everything else that comes with going to school i did#and also the reason i don't feel like shit is i haven't done much this summer!!! literally everything was fighting for my time and attention#last summer and i felt like i barely had a moment to breathe#one moment I'm in Tennessee with my aunt and the next I'm back in Oklahoma running a convention#and then less than a week later I'm at counselor in training camp for two weeks (would've been three but i got sick due to overworking#myself while at the camp)#and then as soon as all of that was done i had only about a week before school started again#this year i only went to one convention instead of working at one and I'm going to two camps#one was at the start which was a day camp that i work at#and the second one is like next weekend (not this one but the next) and it's an overnight but again only a weekend instead of two weeks#and I'm a camper at that second camp since it's meant for lgbtq+ teens :3#and that's it!!!!#then i have school and in October i have the dan and phil terrible influence tour in Colorado#which means i get to visit my aunt and uncle and my cousin#and i have my nurse gerard costume for halloween#and then at the end of January i have my first furry convention which I'm making a fursuit for currently!!!!!
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