#these are in no particular order btw!!! they're only in order of how much i personally like them :]

[bronx-bomber87]

I know we’re all struggling with this endless hiatus and the lack of new content, so I thought it would be fun to resurrect the #chenfordchats that were circling around the fandom earlier this year. We previously did a question on favorite Tim Bradford quotes, so this time let’s do Lucy! What are your favorite 3-5 (or more if you want) Lucy Chen quotes from the entire series 😊

This does feel endless doesn't it? Not sure why this hiatus has felt longer than when we had the writers strike. That didn't have an end date for a long time. We have one for this one and it's felt worse. Probably because of all the BTS being withheld for now. We're all starving for content of any kind they'll give us. They've been restricted from sharing much of anything. So we're going little stir crazy. 47 days to go LOL We can do it.

This was not easy because these asks never are but always fun. Appreciate the challenge of them. Here we go. These aren't in any particular order BTW. Except by season cause I can't help but organize it. So maybe they are in a specific order ha But not one of ranking by any means. Also I'm not so good at staying within the numbers lmao I suck at it really. So I just did ones I love and I'm probably forgetting some I love but hopefully not.

If I am missing any feel free to do this as well or let me know your favs in the comments. Also these come with commentary cause I am me after all ahaha Was hard to find quotes I love that aren't just Chenford related but Lucy too if that makes sense. That's real hard cause they're so intertwined lol Anyways this is my crack at it please enjoy and don't hesitate to comment should you like to. Also feel free to participate as well more fun when people join in :)

1x01-What's not to love about her opening line as a character? So confident and ready to go. Look at her. Love everything about this line. Confidence rolling off her as she says. Hasn't been squashed yet by her future soulmate....

1x03-I LOVE this line for how it lands with Tim. But mainly we get to see the early sparks of confident Lucy putting Tim in his place. Standing up for herself. Because if she doesn't her career is going up in flames along with Tim's epic flameout. Telling him like it is and I love her for it.

1x07-Another amazing line that lands so well. This is an iconic scene but this line right here. This IMO is what keeps Tim from crossing that line. It's so spot on. She went out on a major limb and it pays off. Just love this line in particular.

2x01-Are we sensing a theme? LOL It was accidental. But I do love Lucy putting my boy in his place when warranted. Standing up for herself in the process. Straight up owns his ass in this argument with dem fighting words. Love her for it.

2x08-Always love watching her fierce loyalty come out despite rank. heh I love this line. Because once again calling someone out on their crap. Why we love our girl so much isn't it? So many reasons but this is definitely one of them.

2x10-Our poor girl so very frustrated with dating especially as a cop. This is an epic line that I don't think gets enough love. Cracks me up so much.

2x11-Love me some BAMF Lucy. It's one of my favs. The fierceness she shows not only saying this line. But making sure she makes eye contact with Caleb when she delivers it. I love her so much. We all know how true this statement ended up.

3x05-This seems like two quotes in one cause it kinda is. Already breaking the rules as is so here we are haha Fiercely protective Lucy reporting for duty with this quote. Loved it so much. She gonna beat your ass Stanton.

3x07-This line will never cease to crack me up. She owns his ass this entire episode really. It's one giant mic drop for her. This one is one of my all time favs of that ep and in general. I dare you to watch that scene let alone that ep and not be laughing.

4x16-Her reply to Tim's reaction makes me cackle. Her comedic timing is perfection. She is fed up with her hubby at this point and it makes me laugh so much. Goes from playful to over it immediately.

4x22-Lucy's reaction to Juicy is an all time fav. She was having fun messing with Tim over Dim till then. Her replies are so funny I love this quote for how much it makes me laugh every time. She is disturbed and not having fun anymore. LOL

5x12-Such an iconic way to drive her point home with this epic line. No more needed to be explained after this line. I adore this quote and the way she delivers it to Tim.

Lucy Chen is me when i'm prepping for anything with my anxiety. This cracked me up so very hard. Also couldn't find a gif of this glorious line. So just edited down a gif I did ha but I adore this line for how much I related with it LOL She is me when I am prepping.

That's all folks. Hope you enjoyed my rambles. Feel free to comment or do your own that would be fun to see others do it as well. Best part of fandom doing stuff like this. Seeing what everyone loves.

[3hobbitsinatrenchcoat]

Some initial thoughts:

So after seeing four minor untagged spoilers in the span of an hour yesterday I finally caved and bought Dragon Age Veilguard. I played for almost five hours last night and I have. Opinions (but not the ones you might think).

I'm gonna start this with: I am enjoying myself immensely. This game is objectively fun and the characters are delightful.

So here are my thoughts in no particular order. Given that most of my annoyances so far are personal preference shit... They're minor.

I MISS top-down strategy. That's what made the game fun to me, specifically. The ability wheel is cool and all but it's not what I'm used to. Old man yells at cloud or whatever.

someone in the art department has a thing for Pixar mom dumptruck ass and hips and it SHOWS

I saw someone say you could dive in headfirst and you'd crack your head open if you tried (saying the lore isn't that deep) but quite frankly I'm not finding that to be true. There's quite a bit of lore.

I love all the scattered notes that aren't codex entries.

God the fade is so cool. Lighthouse concept?? Having to unlock rooms??? *chefs kiss*

So far the gameplay seems... A bit remenicent of DA2 with how railroad linear it is. (Derogatory) I'm hoping that changes when I progress further since I'm only a few hours in and Inquisition also took a long time to open up.

I wish they'd gone less smoothened cartoony with the animation. It just kinda looks weird to me. Sorry Bellara your jaw and chin situation is unsettling to me. Also the Pixar dumptruck ass makes another appearance in this point too.

The dumptruck ass isn't a negative btw it's just. So noticible that it's distracting me during cutscenes XD

As much as I miss top down gameplay the ability combo mechanics are LIT. That's so much fun.

I spent almost half an hour in the character creator. Take that for what you will.

I was initially skeptical about only including three choices from DAI as the things that change the story but after seeing what those choices were and the opening parts of the game I can see why. Am I disappointed? A little. But it's a completely different area of the world dealing with their own bullshit a not insignificant number of years later. Whoever is on the throne of ferelden isn't gonna matter when you have fucked up darkspawn crawling into your bed at night.

Speaking of those darkspawn. what the FUCK. THEY'RE SO MUCH MORE TERRIFYING??? WHY ARE THEY GLOWING??

If Varric doesn't talk about hawke at least once I'm gonna chew on bioware's fibre optic cables

That's all I really have on first impressions. I'm gonna sum this up by talking about a different franchise: Assassin's Creed. When they pivoted into open world they lost a lot of what I considered core gameplay. It still had the AC name and was in the same world with the same lore, but I had to learn to love it again.

That feels like what is happening here. The world is the same but the gameplay itself has been changed by time and consumer perception. It's fun but it'll never feel the same way it once did for some people.

And that's ok.

[scattered-winter]

looking to fuck myself up this weekend inquiring top 5 jason comics :)

while there are in fact very many jason comics in this world, asking for 5 good ones is a very tall order. nevertheless I did my best because I love he :]

5: batman: a death in the family

as depressing at it is, it's a great look into the catalyst event that really created jason as he is today <3 it has some.....less than stellar moments (joker becoming an islamic diplomat for some fucking reason, for one. what the fuck, dc) but overall if you're looking for being fucked up <3 that's a good way to go <3 and also a very good starting point for jason comics in general if you're getting into them for the first time!!!*

4: wayne family adventures (on webtoon)

funky and fun :] if you're looking for basic info/characterization on jason (or ANY batman character, tbh) it's a pretty good place to start for people who don't know who they like yet/where else to go. I will say that the character portrayals are VERY surface-level and since the webtoon is more of a comedy/slice of life genre, a lot of the....darker, messier aspects of the characters are left out, and some of the fanon characterizations have some influence on the writing from what I've seen. however it's very good for some fun shenanigans that don't require much brainpower <3

3: countdown: search for ray palmer

jaykyle bible <3 I also really love jason's characterization in this one as well, which is fairly hard to come by because his writing is so inconsistent. if you want clarification on the huge crisis event that this comic is part of, I am the Wrong person to ask <3 I largely ignore the big crises because they're so fucking confusing and I have a brain the size of a peanut

2: red hood: lost days

second to utrh only because of The Unspoken Thing that happens at the end of one of the issues (I.....cannot remember which one for the LIFE of me) that every jason fan has collectively wiped from their memory <3 it never happened <3333 but other than unspoken horrors, it's a good jason read!!! it shows some background on how he grew and changed after his resurrection into the red hood

1: batman: under the red hood

here it is <3 the red hood bible <3 every time someone has an incorrect idea of how jason acts/thinks I am waving this comic under their nose and assigning it like homework. imo this one is essential reading to understand red hood jason and if I had my way it would be required to read before writing ANYTHING about him (both canon dc writers and fanfic writers smfh)

*it's a good place to get into jason if you want to read about him as red hood, since that's the kickoff that begins his red hood journey, but if you want to read more about him as robin it's one of the last things you read. unfortunately I haven't read very many robin!jason comics since (while i LOVE the boy!!!!) he isn't as interesting to me as red hood!jason, but there are people you can ask for recs!!! @/autisticredhood would be a great person to ask for robin jason comics I think <3

ask me my top 5/10 anything!!

[autisticsupervillain]

Someone needs to do a thing about Phoenix Wright becoming a Tumblr celebrity/meme in universe, getting treated in a similar way to how we treat Hbomberguy irl. You cannot tell me that Tumblr wouldn't see a lawyer solve a fifteen year old cold case by cross examining a parrot and not immediately declare him our king.

_________________________________________

Werewolf--Sex:

On trial rn and my defense attorney seems to be lowkey flirting with the prosecutor and it's really killing the mood ngl.

________________________________________

Steelsamuraiass:

OP, your attorney is Phoenix Wright. He's been married to that Prosecutor for fifteen years. I even credits him for inspiring him to take up law in the first place.

_________________________________________

Werewolf--Sex:

Aw, that's actually really sweet.

_________________________________________

Engarde-Simp:

Didn't that guy once solve a fifteen year old cold case by cross examining a parrot?

_________________________________________

Werewolf--Sex:

What?

_________________________________________

Wrightworthkismesis:

Newbies discovering the pure insanity that is Phoenix Wright's career will never not be funny. Your trial is gonna be legendary.

_________________________________________

Engarde-Simp:

Did you really not do any research on your attorney before hiring him?

_________________________________________

Werewolf--Sex:

Doing research rn. This guy's career is insane. Listed in no particular order, my attorney, Phoenix Wright has apparently:

Needed to have evidence law explained to him mid-trial

Proven the existence of ghosts to win his trials(?????????)

Defended an orca in court.

Only lost three times in his entire career (absolutely fucking insane if you know how Japanifornia's legal system is. Tbh, defendants are screwed in our current system.)

Successfully proven that the prosecutor committed the crime his client was accused of by checking him with a metal detector.

Claims to have a magic necklace that can let him see lies??????

Was once nearly taken out by the mafia.

Once got impersonated by a dude with a cardboard badge.

Repeatedly been assaulted by witnesses and even prosecutors? Like, one of them straight up tazed him and he was once apparently whipped unconscious in court???

Survived getting hit by a speeding car and being sent flying, falling through a burning bridge, and all the times he got assaulted.

Also, that description of his relationship with the Prosecution really doesn't do any justice. Apparently, Phoenix only started practicing law so he could meet this man in court again.

Who gave this indestructible homosexual a law degree? He clearly has too much power.

_________________________________________

Sold-To-Gavinners:

Actually! Phoenix Wright is a fraud who got disbarred for forging evidence! I'd really appreciate it if we stopped ignoring all the bad things he did just because he's gay.

#anti-pw #freekristoph #antijurorsystem #anti-matt engarde

_________________________________________

Engarde-Simp:

Of all the Gavins, why'd you decide to simp for the one whose a creepy lawyer serial killer? The other one's the one with the band ya know.

_________________________________________

Sold-To-Gavinners:

Your name is literally Engarde-Simp.

_________________________________________

Wrightworthkismesis:

Wasn't Phoenix blackmailed into that trial and that's why he lost.

_________________________________________

Steelsamuraiass:

Yeah, apparently Matt hired an assassin to kidnap his girlfriend or something.

_________________________________________

Wrightworthkismesis:

_________________________________________

Steelsamuraiass:

Googled it. Apparently it was his co-council. They're just friends from what I can tell.

_________________________________________

Wrightworthkismesis:

_________________________________________

Warewolf--Sex:

Got declared not guilty btw. Apparently the real killer was the Judge.

_________________________________________

OfficialPWPost:

Official Phoenix Wright post.

[howdoesagrapewrites]

𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐨𝐧 𝐉𝐚𝐰𝐬 𝐈𝐈

Plot: Imagine being the legitimized bastard of Daemon Targaryen, and having a very devoted family.

Cw: incest/targcest, yandere/lovesick behavior, unhealthy relationships, platonic and romantic yanderes, not everyone is romantically involved with reader, yandere EVERYONE x reader, Aegon II is creepy

Notes: someone told me they were waiting for part 2  🥹 btw I hate the show's timeline as a book reader because it makes absolutely no sense and I can't write properly, halfway through this I literally have decided to throw it away and run with what my heart tells me, otherwise I'll combust

>When your father came back from the war of the stepstones in 115 a.c, newly wed to Laena Velaryon, you didn't think anything was going to change, right?

>You missed the Vale, you didn't like seeing your father and Rhea fighting, but she was so kind, just like your wet nurse, she wasn't here in the castle either

>But there was a lot of new people here, and you liked them all, since they're all your family, it is only natural you'd love them all, they often say they love you too

>When the news of Rhea's death and Daemon's nuptials came, almost arriving together, it sparked a sense of empathy and compassion throughout the red keep

>All of the Targaryens were already too "heedful" with your care, declaring you'd be cared for only by family, and in the extraordinary case no one was around, there was two very meticulously chosen handmaidens who were to watch over you until a family member was available

>This measure was whispered from Otto Hightower to king Viserys, this passed as a safety measure, saying that because of your origins, you were at risk, setting the infamous "princess of Flea Bottom" title as precedent to say you were not welcomed by everyone, and therefore in danger (even if everyone who was even rumoured to be against your stay in the castle, had already been "taken care of"). Of course no one objected

>This reawoke an old rivalry between Rhaenyra and Alicent, old playmates with unspoken grudges, now desperate to prove they could be a better, more adequate influence in your life

>Willfully ignoring your young age, and the fact you'll likely forget half of whatever they say by the time you're ten, what matter is that even when Daemon takes you away, you'll be able to remember one of them with particular fondness

>It was the truth, a hard and bitter truth, that you'd have to eventually leave, everyone looking for excuses to give to Daemon once he arrived, in order to keep you around longer, maybe indefinitely

>Alicent felt uneasy when thinking of stealing you away from your sire, as much as she disliked Daemon, and believed you'd be much better off being raised as hers, along with her children, you clearly loved him, you drew pictures and saved "treasures" to give to him once he returned

>You also used to ask about Rhea, no one had the heart to tell you, but still fearing the crude words your father would use to tell you of her passing, after all, Rhea was still "his bronze bitch". Finally, it was Viserys who had to break the news to you, he was considerate and comforting, even explaining how his parents and former wife passed away as well, and how he still carries them in his heart

>You lacked the proper cognitive development to fully process it, but it made you sad you were never to see Rhea again, this made you even closer to Viserys

>Alicent wondered if there was a possibility of offering one of his son's hands, if that would make you stay, she certainly wouldn't be displeased to have as a daughter in law, Rhaenyra did the same, after all, wasn't the heir to the iron throne a much better match?

>But the day finally came, where you had to leave

>Your father forsook his crown as King of the narrow sea to Viserys, who humorously put the crown on your little head, and named you princess of the narrow sea

>With the crown falling to your forehead due to its size, you hugged your father as soon as you saw him, with giggles and words of affection, as much as it endeared them, it broke everyone's heart to remember how your time in the red keep was nothing but extraordinary. Viserys thanked the seven no one could hear his thoughts, it would be improper for a king to wish for war, just to keep his baby niece around

>This moment created a long string of creative bards singing about Y/N Targaryen, princess of the narrow sea, queen of hearts

>It was finally time for you to go to leave, Laena was ecstatic to take you with her after meeting you for the first time, but she was a smart girl and noticed she was taking away something very precious

>But celebrations had passed and it was time to go

>You lived in Pentos for the next 10 years of your life, with your father, step-mother and little sisters, Rhaena and Baela

>Daemon was not so happy to take you to King's Landing for different events, however, Laena said it was good for you to be around your cousins and nephews, good for the twins as well

>And she said that since you had your own dragon, it's best to just, it'd be better for you to not feel trapped, otherwise one day you'll just get on dragonback and do as you please

>Daemon did not like the idea of you ever leaving or having enough independence to just hop on a dragon and leave, but he understood his wife was right

>When Laena lightheartedly told the prince of Pentos that he must only ask if he wished to marry one of the girls, Daemon grimaced in his classic unsubtle fashion

>You and your sisters were excitedly ogling the new dragon egg that was meant for your sibling

>One night, Rhaena came to your room looking for comfort, she feared her new little brother or sister would have a great dragon like Vhagar, or swift as Moondancer and then she'd be left alone

>You had Dagahrion, and Baela had Moondancer, both dragons were bonded with you since birth, but Rhaena's died shortly after hatching. She was given another egg, that sadly had not even hatched

>According to the dragonkeepers, Dagahrion still needed a little more time before you could safely ride, and Moondancer had a long way to go.

>Dagahrion and Moondancer were polar opposites, where Moondancer was small, slender and agile, with lightly coloured pale sage green scales and pearl horns, Dagahrion was growing larger by the day, heavy and mighty, with black scales that shone like a green tourmaline in the sun, and dark laurel colored horns. The dragons would often play together, and were called "the greyhound and the mastiff"

>Rhaena feared her bond with you would be outshined by the future races and sky stunts you and Baela would share. And when Aemond took Vhagar, it felt even worse

>After Laena's death, you had lost a mother again. You deeply mourned her, but you felt a different kind of sadness watching Rhaenys coddle the girls in the funeral, and Corlys telling Lucerys he'd be the lord of Driftmark. Rhaenys had you on her embrace as well, but the looks on you had brought a bitter truth to your attention, one that was nonexistent in Pentos, and swept under the rug in King's Landing. You were a bastard. The whimsical melodies about the princess of the narrow sea, had made you forget the princess was born illegitimate

>You were now 13, and the stares and whispers your family shielded you from, were words much easier to put together, faces much easier to see

>The lords and ladies gossiped when everyone ran to hug you before the true orphans, you felt guilty

>"Lady Laena leaves two true-born daughters on the coast" said Vaemon. You smiled through the pain

>Your father started laughing to try and shut him up, it worked

>It also pained you to reunite with your beloved playmates, and see Aegon, your azantys, who you admired, now turned into a creep. He hugged you longer than he did with anyone else, but his hands lingered in a way you couldn't enjoy

>Lucerys and Jacaerys were there with you and your sisters, just like you could see the look thrown at you, you could see them being thrown the way of the Velaryon brothers. You didn't talk much, but you enjoyed their company

>Aemond tried to latch onto you and take you to where his family was, but after some time you had to return to your sisters, he didn't like that

>Helaena was just like you remembered her, she was still ever so gentle and had so many things to tell you about her bugs

>But some of her words were now cryptic to you

>"My dear Y/N, dragon in the flesh, do not believe the dragons in thread" she kept repeating, not even looking at you

>You slept in the room that was meant for your father, he hadn't returned yet. You slept in the second bed in that room rather than with the other children, you wanted to cry, but wanted to appear strong for your sisters, so you preferred to be away for the night

>However, the ruckus woke you up, Aemond stole Vhagar, and Lucerys made him lose an eye

>Jacaerys told you about the "hilarious" time they gave Aemond a pig, you silently reprimanded them, you didn't find it funny, but to go and steal Rhaena's last connection to her mother?

>Vhagar was not a heirloom, not a thing, but Rhaena deserved a chance to try to tame her before others did

>You were upset, however tried to stay at Aemond's side, after all, he was the one who lost an eye

>At least until you heard your nephew. "He called us bastards", you looked at him with a sad, disappointed expression before completely (and literally) turning your back on him to go console your sisters

>Rhaena was the most affected, her connection to her late mother, and to her sisters, was stolen by Aemond. In the moment, she feared Aemond would steal you away too, you seemed to be fond of him, and the queen would often tell stories of how close you were with her children. Losing you to Baela was one thing, she was her twin, and you would be within reach, but Aemond?

>Aemond was true to his words when he said gaining a dragon was worth losing an eye

>But he wasn't so sure it was worth losing you

[mysticdoodles]

hi i saw a post about the fish playing with the human child and even though your addition to that post is 3 years old by now i would love to hear more about ftm sheephead fish :3 (no pressure btw!)

Fish curiosity, in my inbox?? It's more likely than I think, apparently! xD

First off, there's actually multiple fish dubbed 'sheephead'! There's the sheepshead- note the extra S in there- and they look like this:

And yes those are their teeth. Horrifying tbh, but they're very good at what they do- crushing invertebrates and other shelled snacks! They're an Atlantic species that sticks to temperate and warmer waters, and they max out at about half a meter in length.

That's not the fish we're talking about today. The focus of today is the California sheephead wrasse- note the lack of a second S- also known as the 'sheephead' for short. Not confusing at all! We definitely don't bash our heads into walls over the naming conventions and lack of record-keeping of our scientist predecessors.

THIS is the sheephead wrasse, the species of the lovely and now Tumblr-famous Red! :D With a length of up to a FULL meter, they're a whole different size class of fish! They can be found along the west coast USA from the Baja Peninsula all the way up to Monterey, and dwell almost exclusively in kelp forests and nearby environments. I will use one of Red's pics as an example of female coloration-

The lighting isn't great but you can see how her body is streamlined, and besides the white underside of the jaw, has a salmon-pink coloration! Females can be pink or a dull silver-beige. And much like other large marine wrasse, MALES have a drastically different appearance.

This thing is built like a damn tank!! Sheephead are a species of wrasse that shift colors to gain those striking black scales and physically bulk up when becoming males- because guess what? ALL OF THEM ARE BORN FEMALE! By default, all male California Sheephead are FTM trans :) They use that bulky head and extremely tough set of jaws to not only hunt their preferred prey- mollusks, gastropods, and bivalves, etc- but also to bash and chomp down on rival males. This one has won many battles, look at that scarred up muzzle!

The sex change is determined by several factors, as it's not guaranteed all sheephead will eventually become males. Because sheephead school in a harem system- many females to very few males- in order to maximize pressure of stronger offspring, the biggest and healthiest sheephead male will drive out competition from the school. Naturally, a sheephead that lives longer and gains a greater size will have a much higher chance of shifting from a female to a male, if the conditions are right. Stress induced from competition can suppress the hormones that stimulate this transition in females, so they're less likely to gain size and shift from female to male if there's already strong competition taking place. However, in the event there are too few males to mate with the females, or no males present at all, the biggest female will start transitioning to fill the empty slot! It's a long process that can take as few as a couple months, or up to years, depending on resources available.

Conversely, if there are TOO MANY males, they can revert back into females! This process also takes a long time, and is a lot more rare to witness, especially because right now male California sheephead in particular are being spear-fished into becoming an Endangered species :c Sheephead adult males in good condition are considered a trophy animal in spear-fishing and similar marine trophy hunting off the West coast, and because males in particular are being targeted, the gene pool is being reduced when it wrecks the harem structure of schools.

As a fun fact- they're also an incredibly smart fish, and can form relationships with humans, as demonstrated with me and sweetiepie Red cx There's many documented cases of large marine wrasses forming long-term friendships with divers! Here's a humphead wrasse that made friends with a diver she learned would crack snails open for her with a hammer:

I don't work at the facility with Red anymore, but I currently work with two unnamed adult male sheephead, and once again they both like me and seem to despise all my coworkers, even if I never had the opportunity to train them like I did with little Red xD They pick favorites I guess? Now if only I could make friends with the garibaldi...

[mwebber]

what are your favourite martian moments? 😺

thank u for asking eve i'm so glad i get to talk about two of my favourite people on god's green earth <3 in no particular order just off the top of my head...

#1: ABU DHABI 2022 i cannot state just how much brain damage this moment did to me. like i vividly remember freaking the fuck out about the martian interview on sky and talking to the besties and barbi @brawn-gp was like omg another moment do u want me to clip. and i was like YEAH YES. PLEASE. I LOVE YOU (i love you <3) and then i saw it and blacked out and when i awoke it was to this. unparalleled brainrot Truly there will never ever be another

#2. MARRIAGE QUOTE do i need to say anything else. when i saw this for the first time i think i nearly had an aneurysm

#3. SINGAPORE 2008 their first real red bull date.......... i think about them sitting on that couples rickshaw every monday giggling with each other generally being blushy messes sharing secretive smiles like they're the only ones in on a joke. also mark pretending to push seb off a building only to catch him STOP my heart is melting

(tumblr is being dumb and won't credit the gifs properly but they're from thnx-mate-blog)

#4. VLAD RYS GEORGIA K MOMENT this is unironically my favourite pic of seb to ever seb. and of course he's looking at mark. no further comments

#4.5 THE OTHER VLAD RYS GEORGIA K MOMENT. this photo is still so mind-boggling like why the fuck are you looking at each other like that. hi. hello?

#5. MONACO 2010 HUG.

#6. MAKE LOVE TO EACH OTHER / ALWAYS REMEMBER YOUR FIRST TIME. it's literally so fucking funny to me that red bull saw everybody's martian brainrot and was like. wouldn't it be so fucked up if we dropped that mark buttered seb's muffin after china 2009. twirls hair. haha wouldn't it be soooo random. if we did that

#7. WHATEVER THE FUCK THIS IMAGE IS. i can't even look at it for too long i start feeling funny in my tummy

#8. SEB'S LONGING STARE. i ccant believe i forgot this one it should be higher up perhaps

#9. AUSTRALIA 2016/2017. their podiums are SSOOOOOOO.

#10. MATCHING PORSCHES. is it hot in here? do you feel feverish? i feel feverish

#11. RIGHT ONE'S HEAVIER. monaco 2021 when mark casually revealed how much he knows seb still after all this time that seb was like ".. yeah!" like he himself was pleasantly surprised that mark still cares and oh god. somebody hold me

#12. NEARLY SKINNY DIPPING AU CANADA. caliss de tabarnak attache ta tuque mark nhabille pas des sous vetements criss de tabarnak de caliss d'esti de sacrament de

(from thnx-mate-blog)

13. VERY GOOD. i just know they had a Conversation after mark retired that was soo insightful and healing that they still reference to this day. they're very good with each other. btw. if u didn't know.

14. LOVER'S TIFFS. i can't. i can't think about them anymore i think i need to be put in a straightjacket and locked up

#15. 2013 PRIZE GIVING. the way they look at each other...... i'd write 5 million words of rpf too

there's literally so many more moments i want to include on here like mark's "i hope when i'm 70 they're not still asking if i love sebastian" or top gear when mark was like "my dad always said you shouldn't hit boys mate" or when seb and mark were at hangar 7 post 2010 and he went for the wettest limpest high five hand hold known to man or when mark massaged seb's shoulder in australia 2009 or their 1-2 podiums in 2009 or in 2020 when mark was like i've moved on from ferrari for u or "seb didnt expect sex in monaco" or china 2010 when they were bitching with each other or when seb was like i don't understand what he's saying half the time or when seb was on mark's shoulders for a red bull stunt or when they played cricket in australia 2012 or when mark was like we're very well-suited to each other both very handsome in that one magazine or when mark addressed their relationship in like 2014 and said we wished each other well in austria as you do or after multi 21 when seb was like i was racing i was faster i passed him i won and mark was like a cheetah never changes its spots we'll be fine or early on when mark was like we'll get hot chocolate together and i'll be going on about smth that happened before seb was born and he'll roll his eyes or when seb was like i learned a lot from mark or when seb said he'd give mark free hotel toiletries for his bday or when they copied each other trying to put stickers on their car or when someone changed seb's wikipedia page to say he's dating mark or when they did their pepe jeans butt ad or turkey 2011 when they all but caressed each other in 4k or the brazil 2011 cheek cradle or their websites i haven't even talked about their websites yet [I AM FORCIBLY DRAGGED AWAY]

[becauseimanicequeen]

WHAT I’M CURRENTLY WATCHING

It's been a while since I made one of these lists. But here I am with a new one, including the queer shows I'm currently watching. (As always, they're in alphabetical order, because that's just how I am, lol).

4 Minutes (Thailand):

This show is my current obsession. Period. The content on my blog being 99.999999999% about 4 Minutes right now says it all.

Addicted Heroin (2024) (Thailand):

I've seen both the original as well as Stay With Me, which were both fine. I was curious enough to see what Thailand would do with it, which is why I'm watching. And I'm loving it, so far.

I like Hero, even though he's an idiot. And I like the supporting pair. Hero's dad, though... No.

Battle of the Writers (Thailand):

I still have no idea what this show is about except for a couple of writers, two of which have a history together. But, I got to see three of my Playboy babes, so that's a win for me.

First Note of Love (Taiwan):

I'm spoiled with my beloved Taiwanese QLs right now. I'm even more spoiled that I have yet another very rare show where I can actually listen to the music played and sung without muting the damn thing. And I'm spoiled fucking rotten because I've got Charles Tu on my screen again.

I love everything about this show 5 episodes in, and it makes my Mondays a lot brighter (and my Mondays were fine before this, btw).

Happy of the End (Japan):

I like my Japanese shows dark and complicated. So, I'm obviously loving this.

Hidden Moon (Thailand):

I'm only one episode into this one so I don't really have much to say other than that I like the vibe and that it's visually stunning so far (always a plus for me).

I Hear the Sunspots (Japan):

I'm a bit torn with this one. But I love the representation of the deaf community because my great-grandfather was deaf.

(Kind of unrelated, but kind of not: My great-grandfather didn't know sign language, he just read lips. And he was always most comfortable around people who treated him like just anyone else.)

I Saw You In My Dream (Thailand):

Considering I only started watching this because I saw a gif of Ai wearing a Dream Theater shirt (which was my dad's favorite band before he passed away), I wasn't expecting much. But it's surprisingly enjoyable.

The only critique I have is that they ended this week's episode right in the middle of Ai and Yu kissing. Not that I think they'll go all the way in that particular scene. One of them will probably stop. But cutting the scene there... That's just rude. (I'm joking... But kind of not.)

Kidnap (Thailand):

I'm just one episode in so I don't have much to say other than that I love that Papang is in it. I always need more of him on my screen.

Live in Love (Thailand):

This is another one I'm only one episode into (the second one comes out today), so I don't have much to say other than that I really like the vibe so far.

Monster Next Door (Thailand):

I'm a simple girl. I would watch Big in anything as long as he's kissing boys, because this boy knows how to kiss boys.

The On1y One (Taiwan):

Again, I'm spoiled with my beloved Taiwanese QLs right now. And this one is everything to me.

I knew it would be amazing (it's from the same director who made Your Name Engraved Herein) so, no surprise there. And if I wasn't so busy screaming about 4 Minutes during the little spare time I have now that I'm in the middle of a big art project, I would be screaming about this show.

I only needed 10 seconds of the first episode to be hooked (them looking at each other was all I needed to be sold). 6 episodes in, and I'm in heaven.

Seoul Blues (Korea):

This is from the same creators of Blue Boys and Bad Guy and I'm watching it solely for the chemistry and the... how should I describe it? Mellow vibe?

The Trainee (Thailand):

I had a hard time getting into this one. Mainly because I can't relate to the whole office environment thing (I've always worked for myself). But somewhere around the end of the second episode or the beginning of the third, I was sold. Mostly due to the dynamics between the characters and that everyone is unique and flawed in their own way. Plus, the colors are amazing.

It's been a while since I had at least one new episode to watch every day (I think it was sometime before the summer), so I'm starting to get back to normal again. And I love it here.

[olderthannetfic]

I do think a lot of the problem and the reason that more people (like the ones who seem to think that "top/bottom as myers-briggs personality types" jokes are exclusively coming from female-centric fandom spaces rather than gay male offline culture - which, btw, ignores that a whole bunch if not most female fanfic writers are themselves queer and there's a similar set of jokes and stereotypes in the lesbian community, but I digress) don't seem to understand what offline queer culture is like on here is that way too many of the people setting the tone for this in The Discourse on Tumblr are very young people who are newly out. In particular, a huge amount of the gay men on here who are telling people how very Problematic this is (when they're getting it from gay men and not circular discourse among other women in fandom who are claiming to speak on gay men's behalf) is coming from young gay men who don't have much of a community offline, and especially young gay trans men who often aren't yet presenting as male outside of the Internet. It's really hard to talk about, because it so easily risks saying those people's identities aren't valid - and like, we've seen TERFs weaponize that discourse to suggest that gay trans men involved in fandom are just straight women who identified too hard with their blorbos or something, as well as the endless use of "passing privilege" to suggest that bi people in F/M relationships are "basically straight" - but I think one thing people need to understand better is the difference between "your identity is valid, your personal experiences with homophobia/transphobia/etc. are valid" and "your judgments about the larger community that your identity makes you a member of are valid." Like, you do actually have to participate in a community to be able to be able to talk about what the consensus in it is, what the cultural norms are. You have to actually look up the history in order to know that history. If you're going to speak on behalf of All Gay Men you probably should know some beyond yourself - including ones who are not Very Online and/or aren't active in fandom - and that goes for both cis and trans gay men. (And the same is true for every subdivision of LGBTQ+, I've seen similarly bizarre takes about "lesbian culture" from 17-yro lesbians who clearly haven't talked to any outside of Tumblr and insular, dramatic Discords.)

Like, to use an analogy here to another kind of oppression: say you have a black person who was adopted by a white family very young and lived in an exclusively white neighborhood and doesn't know any other black people. Obviously, they are still black, and obviously they still experience racism (probably especially because they're an outlier in that community). Obviously, their own understanding of their identity and their experiences with racism are valid. But they aren't necessarily going to have any better of an understanding of the broader black COMMUNITY - cultural traditions, history, etc. - than a non-black person who was similarly not exposed to that community. They can only speak for themselves. And someone who isn't black but grew up near/in black communities (for instance, perhaps another transracial adoptee who was adopted by a black couple? or even just a non-black person who grew up in a heavily black neighborhood) might actually have a better sense of that broader community/culture than they do.

And this isn't a hypothetical. I've heard stuff like that about feeling like outliers in black American culture from everyone from the aforementioned transracial adoptees; to multiracial black people who were raised primarily by their non-black family; to black people who are recent immigrants from Africa rather than descendants of slaves; to black people from Europe or other parts of the Americas, who have some similarities in their culture but it's not completely 1:1. And especially from people who are some combo of the above. They have an understanding of themselves as black and of their relationship to race and racism, of course, but don't really feel like they have a particularly strong understanding of The Black Community or The Black Experience as we understand it in the USA.

I think what a lot of people don't understand is that newly-out queer people are often like that. A lot of other marginalized identities - like being a cis woman (this applies less to trans women unless they've known from early on) or being a POC - are ones where you grow up with an understanding of what that means and often a connection to a broader community that gives you some kind of consciousness of what it means to be A Woman or Black or Asian or whatever. But with queerness, it's usually not something you fully understand about yourself until adolescence or adulthood, and even when you do, you don't necessarily have access to a "community" around that until that age because you're probably being raised by cis straight people. You have to take time to discover that community and learn about it, and the culture and history that goes with, and when you start out you're going to be just as ignorant as a straight cis person who is similarly isolated from queer communities. (And frankly, a straight person with a lot of gay friends might know better than you do at first! As a lesbian with a lot of gay male friends, most of whom couldn't care less about my slash fanfic hobby if they even know about it, that's precisely why I know that these takes on Tumblr are so bizarre)

(Disability is the interesting one because it sometimes overlaps with this, sometimes doesn't - and one of the big divides in the community IME is around people who have lifelong understandings of themselves as "disabled" vs. came to it more recently, whether because the disability itself is a new thing or just their diagnosis of it. A lot of people in the second group can have very similar experiences and act in similar ways to newly-out queer people, and I know because I've lived both myself, lol.)

I think people have taken the idea of "everyone is the best expert on their own experience with oppression and their own identity" and distorted that into some weird essentialism where being gay or bi or trans or whatever gives you automatic understanding of "queer culture" or "queer history" without having to do the actual work of talking to people, participating in that community, studying history, etc. but that's just not true. Anyone can study that history and get to know those people. And yeah, as a queer or trans person you'll have a better opportunity to really deeply know and be part of that community than straight cis people with queer friends ever will, but you still have to like. Actually put yourself out there! You're not going to find it by just discoursing in a vacuum of ignorance.

--

Sadly, to all the Olds, this is very, very obvious, but there's no way to make it obvious to the people doing it. It's a matter of experience.

[smaller-comfort]

So how do you imagine snail love darts and necrontyr working/combining? Cause I am interested~

Aksjdhsk ahahaha oh god okay here we go

(Tumblr crashed on me three times while I tried to write this, but I will not let that stop me from rambling at length about snail sex, speculative xenobiology, and various ways that necrontyr get to be fucked up little guys.)

Okay. Some assumptions/general thoughts: necrontyr do not have "dual-use" reproductive/waste elimination systems (inferred from Trazyn's hilarious disgust at the idea, but honestly it would be entirely believable for him to have completely lost any and all memories of necrontyr biology). A lot of higher order animals do (they're efficient!), but you start to see ones that don't when you get down to bugs and marine creatures, so that's what kicked off this train of thought.

I'm assuming also there is relatively little sexual dimorphism among necrontyr (not for any particular reason, although my understanding is that actual female necrons are a relatively new thing in wh40k lore, so that fits). And finally, everyone constantly dying of turbo cancer has led to a 'throw everything but the kitchen sink at it' evolutionary approach to reproductive strategies.

Okay, now snails: they use the darts during courtship to deliver hormones that increase the likelihood of fertilizing their partner's eggs; after the several-hours-long mating dance, they'll exchange spermatophores. (Fun fact, the penis, copulatory canal, and dart sac are all located inside the genital pore, on the snail's head. Mating dances can involve a lot of biting.) Snails have bad aim, but it's not uncommon for both snails to end up getting stabbed during courtship.

"Copulatory canal" is a deeply unsexy phrase, btw. So are most words we use when talking about sex, unfortunately. *sigh*

Anyway. While many necrontyr do only have one set of functional reproductive organs by the time they reach adulthood (either because the other set was always vestigial or because it gets removed to reduce the spread of cancer), both sets are usually present in some fashion. Sterility would be fairly common, but medical technology is able to mitigate some of that; the lower classes, at least, need to be able to breed like rabbits to feed the war machine. Gender is mostly divorced from reproductive role by the time biotransference happens; in addition to male and female, there would have been at least one other normative gender, possibly two (to account for both null and multimodal genders). Gender fluidity would have been common and largely unremarkable for necrontyr. (It's still largely unremarkable for necrons, but it's not particularly common; they're mostly fixed with whatever gender they had at biotransference.)

Okay, so, love darts. Pretty much only ever used by nobles/the military, because in the upper classes of society, sex isn't about reproduction, it's about reinforcing social hierarchies. And necrontyr social hierarchies tend to be inherently about violence in one way or another. Sexual dominance is generally more about who gets stabbed with the dart than it is about which penis is going where. (That's still a factor, but it's secondary, since genital configurations/functionality can be a bit of a wildcard.) Snails take an egalitarian approach to sex; necrontyr categorically do not. Both parties consenting to be darted would be considered weird and perverted.

Kind of going off ancient greek/roman sexual mores here; it would be entirely unthinkable, for example, for Obyron to be the penetrative partner in either sense with Zahndrekh. (Then again, Zahndrekh is a shameless pervert.) Sex between two social equals is generally accompanied by an agreement- sometimes tacit, sometimes explicit- about not using the darts. Doing so would be an overt act of aggression. Often, to prevent any potential misunderstandings, they'll voluntarily empty their dart sacs ahead of time.

Forcing someone to empty their dart sac prior to sex is a pretty common form of sexual humiliation. When done voluntarily, it's a sign of submission or respect. (Darts usually have a refractory period of a few days, depending on the person's overall health. Single-chambered dart sacs are typical, but multiples aren't unheard of. Leads to occasional 'surprise! You thought I was submitting to you but now you're getting fucked instead' situations.)

The dart sac would be located in their mouths, under the tongue; it's meant to be ejected into the soft tissue of the mouth, but it's sharp enough to pierce the skin anywhere. (This does mean kissing can be Complicated, or at least somewhat subversive, depending on everyone's social standing.) Normally it gets broken down and absorbed by the recipient's body; pulling one out tends to be extremely uncomfortable/painful.

The exact cocktail of hormones and neurochemicals it injects the other person with would vary somewhat between individuals, but can potentially vary widely between dynasties or social classes due to genetic/geographic/cultural differences. Some might include a mild paralytic agent; some sort of euphoric effect is also common. (This is all in addition to the original function, which, uh. Is to make the recipient more likely to get pregnant.) The shape of the dart varies in a similar fashion, ranging from a straight, smooth bone spike to something more elaborate with barbs or fluting.

(A bloody mouth can signify a lot of things to necrontyr- in addition to violence or illness, it's also inherently erotic. Necrons who remember this try very, very hard not to think about it when confronted with Flayed Ones.)

(Yenekh: *very sexily smearing his mouth with blood and draping himself all over Oltyx*

Oltyx: *oblivious, can't stop thinking about how pretty Yenekh is*

The rest of the flayed ones: *still not sure why their king and his consort haven't fucked nasty in a pile of carrion yet. Maybe they need a bigger pile of carrion? Yes, that's probably it. They will take care of this for their beloved king.*)

Crypteks have their own social hierarchies within their conclaves, but they're usually not as concerned with sexual politics as nobles and the military tend to be. Most people believe that crypteks all lace their love darts with poison, and the crypteks don't try to discourage that assumption. Some of them probably do, tbh.

Necrons, of course, don't have genitalia, but they can still stab each other with love dart analogues- this ranges from things like executive buffer override packages sent via interstitial channel, to actually physically jamming a spike of necrodermis into a neural input node. (From a purely aesthetic/romantic standpoint I also like the idea of love darts constructed out of crystallized core flux. The first time Zahndrekh does that to Obyron he goes into complete cascade failure and takes several hours to reboot.)

If Orikan and Trazyn did have sex pre-biotransference, one of them would have darted the other without permission (probably accidentally, being that they are both intensely nerdy losers and thus Bad At Sex by necrontyr standards), setting off a sixty-five million year hate-sex feud that neither of them can even remember the origin of. Orikan would've gone after Trazyn's mouth with a pair of pliers at some point; joke's on him, Trazyn's into that.

(Trazyn does have a collection of necrontyr love darts in the archives- all of them ones he collected personally when he was alive. He has no absolutely no memory of slutting it up back in the day, though, and probably doesn't even realize what they are. Sannet, unfortunately, does remember, and wishes he didn't. He has had to put up with so, so much over the years.)

[jo-the-bass-stealer]

who do you need for a (fictional) rebellion?

I've been thinking about this a lot recently, given that my book series is about toppling. . . several monarchies. not quite sure how they're gonna do it yet. anyways.

so often I see posts/articles about how to write revolutionary leaders, but you need more than just a handful of angry people to enact meaningful change! here's a list of character archetypes I see all the time in stories centred around rebellions (in no particular order). you by no means need all of them. mix and match as you please.

a financier. this shit isn't gonna get done without funds.

spies. lots of spies. double agents, triple agents, people on the inside.

symbols for all the propaganda (this can be a person or something else, eg. your mockingjay).

someone who knows their way around the law to de-arrest folks and make sure no one gets caught out, etc.

demo mannnnn. or the swords guy depending on your story's setting (my demo man is a blacksmith).

the Really Angry Young Person (it's usually a teenage boy but obviously you can and should change it up) that's entirely devoted to the cause, willing to do anything.

not like, mandatory, but a character like saw guerrera from star wars comes to mind. specifically in andor, he says that as an anarchist, he's "the only one with clarity of purpose." kind of a blow stuff up now, form a government later kinda guy. basically you need some infighting.

ADMIN. you need someone organising all these madlads. who's reading all these 'emails'?

adding in my personal favourite of these archetypes: the guy that defects from the Institution to join the rebellion. possibly for homoerotic reasons. looking at you, agent kallus (from star wars rebels btw)

a tired older person who's seen far too much bloodshed in their life but is still fighting.

journalists/historians/documentarians/regular people with cameras (or the equivalent in your world), telling the world of the atrocities past and present. this bullet point is directly inspired by the people of gaza sharing the genocide happening there. free palestine, from the river to the sea.

the overlooked second-in-command that's kind of doing most of the actual work and keeping coalitions together n stuff.

the opposite of the spy: the traitor.

someone with charisma to convince people to join up. they're well-spoken and give rousing speeches. often, this person in actually the leader, but they don't have to be.

smaller groups within the rebellion that are probably constantly ignored by the higher-ups. will they break away and form their own movement? you decide.

add more if you can think of any!

[imaginarylungfish]

Hello, if you don't mind, can I ask, who are your top favorite romantic relationship's couples in any media, like anime/manga, tv series, books, etc (can be canon or non-canon)? Feel free if you want to write the reasons or not of why you love them....Thanks if you want to answer....

Ooh how fun! I should just screenshot my ao3 dash lol. Let's see... almost all of these are all animanga (and not canon), but in order of my love for them at this particular moment in time:

TodoBakuDeku

BakuDeku

KilluGon

MatchaBlossom

SatoSugu

ShiGuang

TigerGhost

SasaMiya

ShunMio

KazuRei

Now, explanations, *spoilers*, and honorable mentions below the cut!

TodoBakuDeku (My Hero Academia)

Obviously not canon and never will be but oh does this ship have a chokehold on me. I just think this trio is so balanced in every way. Like we have our precious TodoDeku who connect by being nerds and the sweetest boys. Then we also have TodoBaku who are just lovely little menaces. And, of course, BakuDeku--can't beat friends to enemies to lovers. And then they all come together to form a masterpiece. Idk I just love this ship so much.

BakuDeku (My Hero Academia)

So I honestly really wasn't into this ship too much until reading the final war arc and meta. Other people's viewpoints changed my mind! Hori has done a really great job of portraying BakuDeku's complex relationship in the manga (for however you view their canon relationship). So like idk how can I not ship For-the-Rest-of-Our-Lives Katsuki with Control-Your-Heart Izuku?

Sidenote: I almost didn't include this on the list because I tend to only really ship this pair while reading the manga. I never shipped them in the anime unless it was TodoBakuDeku with Deku as a hinge. And I don't even read many fics with just Katsuki and Izuku. I just feel like fandom BakuDeku feels incomplete without Shouto for some reason. Like I'm Team BakuDeku for the manga, Team hinge TodoBakuDeku in the anime, but throuple TodoBakuDeku in the sanctuary of my mind/on ao3. (Maybe that'll change once I start watching Season 7 though.)

KilluGon (Hunter x Hunter)

I only watched this anime this year but ohmygod I immediately fell in love with Gon and Killua. They are so precious. I mean, Killua is just a little smitten kitten. And Gon? He's in it. Anyway, love their dynamic and of course I ship them. Gon is Killua's light after all!

MatchaBlossom (Sk8 the Infinity)

Literally just started shipping this so I'm in the throes of obsession rn but their dynamic? *chef's kiss* (hehe, you like what I did there?) Childhood friends? Pining while the other falls for another? Realizing feelings? Already married bickering old couple? Give me all the headcanons please!

SatoSugu (Jujutsu Kaisen)

I mean, c'mon. Tragic gays are my weakness. They're gonna be OG for me. No one can compare. They're on a different level. All I want is for them to have hopped on a plane and gone somewhere they can finally find peace, is that too much to ask? (Gege??)

ShiGuang (Link Click)

Again, I said I like tragic gays. But god, I do hope they don't end up too tragic! I love this pairing. They balance each other out well. We have puppy dog Cheng Xiaoshi and cat Lu Guang. Perfection thx.

TigerGhost (Nicktoons Unite)

Ok so this crackship was brought on by my serendipitous viewing of Nicktoons Unite fanart on this beautiful app and subsequent reading of all their fics on ao3 (a grand total of four, btw). And I'm obsessed. I was a diehard Danny Phantom fan as a kid (we stan our queer/genderqueer/bisexual/trans ghost boy). And I never watched El Tigre as a kid, but the way the fandom portrays him and Danny together just hits. Salty and sweet with a lil bit of darkness? Yum.

SasaMiya (Sasaki to Miyano)

First canon ship on this list lol. You want fluff? You got it. Give me some good pining, consent, and mutual respect, thank you.

ShunMio (Stranger by the Shore)

Second and last canon ship on the list! Love me some good ole sun and moon. Idk their story is so cute. Plus, I like how Kii Kana portrays Shun's feelings regarding his sexuality and how that affects his relationship with Mio. It's relatable.

KazuRei (Buddy Daddies)

I mean, this is practically canon, right? Well, at least queerplatonically (which we stan). Love our little found family. This anime had such a cute and goofy premise, how could I not fall for this ship?

(Honorable mentions: TodoDeku, TodoBaku, Labru, DabiHawks, Renga, VashWood, Kappa x Siren, Boyfriends, EraserMic, ItaFushi, InuOkko, ShokoHime, HaiNana, LeoPika, KudoIchi, TogaChako)

[fairycosmos]

Oh boy, things are extremely rough atm. Can you recommend any healthy coping mechanisms? I literally don’t know a single one that works for me except for self destruction and being on my phone until I don’t feel anything anymore. And apparently that’s not what we’re supposed to do when we’re sad

ok so unfortunately all of my healthy coping mechanisms only half work for me and it's a total gamble whether or not they're going to on any given day. and none of them ever cure my mental illness which is annoying. like they're not fail-proof solutions and a lot of the time they're simply frustrating in fact it often feels laughable to even try them. a walk is not going to make any of this better. but consistency DOES strengthen your coping skills like a weak muscle. like even after 3 days of practicing them i'm like Ok well i feel like shit but i survived without hurting myself and that was the whole point. not a cure but a tool. ok i'm just going to list them because otherwise, i will ramble forever. btw it's ok to do like, even half of one of these per day. there's no need to overwhelm yourself at all :) coping is coping.

meditation - it sounds and feels like bullshit but i follow this youtube called great meditation and they upload 10 min guided meditation sessions and they have truly gotten me through a lot of low moments at this point. sometimes i feel much better after and sometimes i barely notice a difference but the point is i've sat and breathed for a bit

journaling - i thought i needed some sort of mental health diary for this but then i just opened a google doc and followed these mental health journal prompts ( just one every other day, nothing overwhelming, and no pressure to write a lot or to write anything in particular) and it helped me organise my thoughts and notice the patterns i was/am locking myself into. there's also trauma processing prompts online if that is what you're after.

free writing - again just opening a word doc but this time you just write without thinking literally letting go and putting down whatever words your fingers type - no judgement no curation no performance no expectations.

submerging my face in cold water, holding ice cubs - good for grounding.

crying my eyes out, purposefully listening to sad songs or watching sad movies in order to do so - cleansing, painful, tires you out and can make you feel renewed briefly.

breathwork - again there's some great youtube vids for this. i do this 20 min nervous system reset somewhat often, but there's shorter ones that are also very effective. box breathing also helps if you just need a simple go to - breathe in for 4, hold for 4, our for 4.

lie down on a hard surface or the floor with your back straight - another grounding thing. to occupy your mind during this you can name 5 things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one you can taste.

pat your arms, legs, stomach, head, chest gently and breathe deeply - again it can be grounding.

watch trail cam vids of cute animals, use the wikipedia page generator to read up on smth you've never really thought about before, download duolingo and start learning a language. not to become fluent just to get your mind out of the place it's in, even for 5 minutes.

literally just move around especially outside - HATEEE to say it but stretching on your bedroom floor, going for a walk, following an exercise video etc - it can really help you feel a bit less stale and myopic. if it's too much, opening a window is a good start. or simply standing outside your house for 2 minutes and going back in. the air will feel good.

make sure all your bases are covered - have you eaten, have you slept, have you showered, have you talked to someone in the last few days, are you hydrated? if not, make a small move towards doing one of those things. feeling like crap physically only compounds how crap you feel mentally and so the cycle perpetuates.

scream, punch/throw pillows, snap pencils, stab at paper with pens.

affirmations - i'm trying to build a list of ones that resonate with me specifically because a lot of them don't LOL. but there's a lot of good resources online for this. one of my favorite current ones is: doing a little is better than doing nothing. a job half done is better than a job not done at all.

do something creative - it's not about being an artistic genius it's about doing something tangible with your hands and getting out of your head and using the space in your brain to focus on something that doesn't feel doomed. drawing, singing, cooking, playing an instrument, writing, whatever you want. you don't have to have done it before. you can just do it.

talk to someone you trust/care about, let them in even a tiny bit. it's ok to verbalise these things. give them a fair chance to be there for you the way you'd want to be there for them. i know it's hard, all of this is, but it's not impossible. also, look for any communal resources you can find - support groups, local therapists who may offer sliding scale prices that are affordable. it all sucks but it's something.

will add more when/if any come to mind. i'm sorry you're feeling like this and i sincerely hope it all becomes a bit lighter for you soon. sending so much love. x

[chaotic-cheese-blog]

I JUST FINISHED BINGING THE DUNGEON MESHI MANGA AND GAAAAAAAAAAAAA (Major ending spoilers ahead)

I just need to ramble about how much I LOVE it :3

(amazing gif btw kevinbikes)

In no particular order:

THAT ENDING!!! So sweet and funny at the end tooooooo

"so that's what the curse was..." Buddy at least you got your sister back 😭😭 (then again, I too would be sad if I couldn't experience my fixations any more)

The dungeon rabbits! Absolutely horrifying! Marcille having to necromancy all her friends 😭😭 (I mean that one panel was kinda funny ngl-). There's no way she isn't traumatized from that.

Scratch that, there's no way they ALL aren't traumatized from that.

Wait a sec,,, I can finally scroll the dunmeshi tags without worrying about spoilers!!

I now get why people said it gets weird,,, I get it,,,

They finally saved Falin! I love how even though it got fucking weird in the end, it was still all to help her

I don't get why they kept saying Marcille's Dungeon lord dress was ugly, I thought it was cute 😭

I find that it was appropriately paced! Before starting, I groaned at the thought of reading all that, but nothing really felt like it dragged on more than necessary (unlike SOME manga *cough cough* one piece *cough cough*)

The golden castle guys get to be on the surface again!

Now onto the fuckass lion:

The bonus 'what-ifs' are actually kinda also depressing? I'm specifically talking about the 'Laios gets eaten ' one, the rest are quite funny.

Of course it all comes down to eating!! It had to!

I KNEW THAT BITCH WAS EVIL FROM THE MOMENT HE ENTERED LAIOS' DREAM

Mithrun's goat story only helped solidify it

(speaking of Mithrun, I'm glad he gets to try living again :) thanks Kabru!)

Am I the only one who thought the way the lion ate desires was kinda,,, KIDDING, KIDDING!! (Unless,,,)

We all agree that when it gave Marcille the dress and told her to fight, that kiss was him eating the desire to flee (or something adjacent) right? Cause there's no way it was anything else

TL;DR: I'm insane about this manga, thank you Ryoko Kui, thank you translators(they're real lifesavers!), the story is great, the characters are awesome and in general it's really AAAAAAOAZJZJSJJQQNJAJAJAJAJAJ (/pos)

The hundreds if not thousands of Laioses being controlled by the demon was certainly ! I have nothing to say, that's for sure!

This isn't everything because otherwise I'd be here all night but:

End of rant.

[tennessoui]

Hey Kit!! This past year when the Acolyte came out, my heart broke and I decided to step away from Star Wars. It’s fine that others liked it but personally I didn’t; actually to be frank, I REALLY didn’t like it. Star Wars and Anakin got me through a lot, so watching Disney take an actual shit on his origin and then his redemption ark by half-assing the lore, felt like a punch to the gut, and I had to step away. (This is my personal opinion, if you or others liked it that’s great! I just didn’t). However, when I saw that u published the body politics au, I decided to sit down and catch up on all your fics (btw I love the Hanahaki one!), and it got me back into the fandom. I’m glad one shitty (imo) show didn’t push me away permanently and I have you to thank for that. I’ve met so many great people thru Star Wars and made a lot friends so it had really been kind of hard to turn away from it. I just really wanted to say thank you. your writing is, as always, too beautiful and inspiring to ignore. Star Wars means so much, and I’m so thankful that your work was able to help me look past all the stuff that made me unhappy with it. I hope you have a wonderful day!!

this is very kind to send to me and a very nice morning read! i admit, i actually have not watched the acolyte, though not for any particular reason. i've definitely heard mixed reviews about the show and its take on the jedi order and the sith, which have been sorta sad to read cause i do like the jedi (though i guess i never label myself as pro-jedi cause like? they're the good guys? you're not like. pro-percy jackson or something right? pro-katniss everdeen? you just sorta read the book and you're like oh yeah these are the good guys. might find aspects of a character annoying but i'm definitely not supposed to be rooting for the Capitol or smething right)

but i've also heard from other people that as a pew-pew show, it delivers on that front! lightsaber fights are cool and everyone has a funky haircut that they pull off somehow which does feel quintessentially star wars

my general view of the disney plus star wars shows is that i'll watch the ones that strike my fancy, and if one of them doesn't then i won't. the star wars disney execs produce a lot of content (and i truly mean content, i.e. material to be consumed - not necessarily art) and a lot of it i'm probably never going to watch. it wasn't made for me, and i definitely get the lurch and disappointment you may feel if you look forward to something for ages and then it's not what you wanted in a thousand small ways or a handful of big ways. i think that's especially hard to guard against nowadays when trailers for tv shows rely more on aesthetic and punchy one-liners and brief second cameos than they do explaining the actual story of the show

but you can be a fan without loving the direction some shows go in or the choices directors make!! if that looks like only watching shows that have been peer-reviewed, or if that looks like ignoring everything but a small corner/subset of a massive fandom, or if that looks like turning from the media itself and diving further into fanart and fanfiction and interacting with people online then that's what it looks like! especially now that the world of canon star wars media isn't just 6-9 movies + 2(?) non trilogy movies, you should absolutely go about watching star wars content with a you-first mindset 100%

you know how many people were disappointed in the obi-wan kenobi series?? soooo many because he was a sad little pathetic and broken man with greasy hair. but that's exactly how i like my obi-wan kenobis, so i was thrilled every episode lol but i'm sure other people hated it and boycotted and whatever. but i found my corner of the fandom who also enjoyed that and it's been wonderful <3

so anyway thankyou so much for your very kind words i hope none of that sounded too preachy i was mostly trying to agree with you that it's really great that one (shitty) show did not keep you away from the fandom forever and that you're back!!

welcome back :)

[mc-critical]

I know I'm retreading old ground here, but I'll always love Süleiman and Gülfem's little scene in E15, because it reveals everything about both Gülfem herself and her relationship with Süleiman now and going forward. Gülfem's role as a conscience in general and for Süleiman in particular emerges, since when his relationships with his women are put to the test, she is the person he turns to as the first woman he's possibly hurt, as the one embodying that distant past everyone seeks to forget but can't as it always resurfaces all over again (and it's sad and telling that she's remembered only in occasions like these). Gülfem as Süleiman's conscience builds off of Hafsa's, Ibrahim's, Mustafa's and Hatice's isolated moments where they've been consciences for Süleiman yet in this scene it completely distinguishes itself as more of a deeper conscience, privy to Süleiman's inner world in ways we don't know but they themselves do, wholly embracing this moment that's just between them both. But the more her view of what she experienced unveils to us, the more this privyness and understanding Gülfem has for her closest springs forth as the coping mechanism she's developed in order to deal with her circumstances - she loves these people so much, so they're by no means at fault, she is, something has to be missing with her in order for it that devasting end to have come forth (her loss has sadly done a number on her self-worth too: how could someone as ""average"" as her advice Hatice on what to write to Ibrahim??; how could someone as ""average"" as her not be at fault??). She clearly isn't over it (shown by her resentment that occasionally crops up especially in her dynamic with Mahidevran, but also a bit by some of her looks during Mehmet's naming ceremony), but she has to accept it, to go with the flow, to cling to fate and the might of Allah as well (her urging Hatice for them to pray to Allah for Ibrahim in E14, also "When we lost our children* at a very young age, I accepted it as the will of Allah."; it's fascinating how close this brings her to both Hatice and Mahidevran: all three of them lean on fate like that, but Gülfem has experienced something so irreperably final and severe that every sign of something good happening, she'll openly and gladly take it, so is able to see the silver linings in Hatice's experiences that Hati herself can not; both Mahidevran and Gülfem lean on Allah, but unlike Mahi who expects and strives for justice for her suffering that's supposedly outside of Allah, Gülfi lets it go and associates the suffering itself too with Allah, if not with herself), focusing on what she already has, taking it with full hands.

And since that entails the people she supports, the last idea of family remaining to her as SS is so unreachable, and she can't bear to lose them too, the only thing left for her is to love them and idealize them but in different ways and amounts due to her different relationships with them, thus creating a sort of a hierarchy of fondness and idealization: going from Mahidevran (who I guess Gülfem is in good terms with not just due to her good relations with Hatice, but also because she's gotten too used to her as part of the family as well; as an ally, a main part of Gülfem processing everything, so when another person like Hürrem appears who's likely to challenge that status quo, that calm Gülfi has absorbed, she stands behind Mahi, shown in E08; btw, Hürrem too may have also become quite a part of that fondness and idealization line later on, but more about that when I get to S04), to Hafsa (the mother figure for whose will Gülfem's respect is usually absolute), to Hatice (the companion she's closest to, so she's able to give her a lot more empathy and understanding), to finally Süleiman, the last pillar of that hierarchy precisely because he's so unreachable and so dear she couldn't express it until this E15 scene and even then not fully. Even if, along with her understanding of them, she can and has called out others when she feels they're unjust namely due to her fondness of them, Süleiman is completely idealized in her mind, put on that pedestal of everything Gülfem yearns for in her life, of the peace he currently emanates but hasn't gotten from any of his women in return according to Gülfem (and it's interesting that Hürrem comes up promising a calmness to SS after she returns from her exile the same episode). But he won't emanate it much longer and the more her loved ones become disillusioned with him and are then stripped away from Gülfem by him, she starts to notice it in ways she can't deny.

So it's perfect that this scene, the first one that directly verbalizes how much loyalty means to SS especially in terms of his women and presents Gülfem as the first such loyal figure, sets her up as the last and perhaps most striking opposer of that idea. Her final act of defiance only appears sudden; it was always meant to happen like this.