#theres literally nothing left in me on every human level

[pears-trinkets]

.

[soullessjack]

something else about the soulless jack arc that rlly … peeved? me is that it gives us both Jack’s and the Winchesters/hunters’ perspectives, but fully plays out as if we the audience are unaware of what happened between jack and mary. it’s still very heartbreaking and gutting nonetheless, but it’s also very inconsistent with how it intertwines the two. following jack, we see him and mary argue and we see him melt down and kill her and we see him feel guilt and grief and fear for it. we know it was an accident and we know that he’s been driven to a point of instability by his own guilt and we know he wants to fix it and we even see jack make an effort to do so.

however, following TFW and Bobby and company, we see them argue about what could’ve happened. Cas suggests that Jack didn’t realize it was wrong (which also implies that everybody automatically assumed jack killed her purposefully, literally giving him no leeway here). Bobby declares that theres nothing left in jack but Lucifer with his human soul gone—that he’s an unstoppable monster who has to be put down just like any other MOTW. Sam and dean argue if Jack is even still Jack and how they should approach it from there. seeing Jack’s own family discuss if and how to stop him does give some tension, but there is zero suspense because —

1) sam and dean knew from Rowena that Jack was trying to resurrect mary; they saw him bring her body back and they saw the anguished look on his face when she didn’t wake up and they heard him say “it didn’t work,” —so that’s already a huge chunk missing, and —

2) we already know the answer to every question they’re posing. instead of suspense at wondering if Jack finally tipped over the edge, we’re dreading the eventual confrontation because we know what they don’t know, and what they do know concerning Rowena and Jack’s failed spell was left out of the entire conversation after it happened.

when jack is on tv and making headlines as a doomsday bringer and dropping bodies for sam and dean to trail, we can’t be in shock that he’s doing something so out of character because we saw Duma manipulate him, saw what she promised him, and we know he’s well-intentioned despite his horrific actions (also, having jack torture/murder ppl for the sake of his family is something he’s already done before, it’s just taken to a new level without his soul to hold him back). everyone is following the narrative that jack has finally gone awol or succumbed to his true nature or whatever, and that is very much played intentionally as the teetering “will he, won’t he” question hanging around jacks entire character. but again, we don’t feel any of the suspense that question typically carries in a story because it’s already answered for us.

you cannot reasonably expect the audience to be in awe and suspense and believe jack is full blown big bad now while repeatedly showing us that jack still has good intentions. Hell, even the scene where they confront jack to trick him into the Ma’lak box is frustrating, because while Jack’s dismissive blame-shifting demeanor about Mary’s death is a reasonable tipping point for sam and dean’s anger and subsequent actions, there’s also the fact that jack very bluntly says things like “I didn’t think I’d see you again / I really missed you guys / I just want everything to be back the way it was,” that purifying the world is “like hunting,” and further more he even agrees to be locked up because, soul or not, he genuinely doesn’t want to hurt anyone anymore; all which very glaringly points to him not being as far gone as we’re supposed to think and worry about.

again, it’s all still very painful and upsetting to watch, but most of the pain comes from the fact that we know the missing details that are creating the conflict and are helpless to do anything with it, rather than the conflict itself.

[nuclearnerves]

INCOMING VAMPIRE AU THOUGHTS

Don't mind me I'm finally getting the ideas I had on this shit out so I can actually go forward with developing it as an AU. It's my usual mixup of fps protags, Gordon Guy and John, but I'm starting with Gordon as the Vampire and Guy as the Vampire Hunter.

absolute beast of a wall of text under the cut

What If Being A Vampire Literally Sucks All The Time Forever like chronic pain sucks. like THAT level of sucks. Like Here's what I was thinking of. Being a vampire isn't just "being alive forever but you need to drink human blood" It's like Oh man I have some lore you look at vampires and their main thing is that they're blood suckers right so lets start with a corpse dead body. cadaver. no longer with us. just some rotting meat. The brain needs oxygen as fuel. The blood supplies the oxygen through blood. The blood is pumped through the heart. The blood is made by your bone marrow. You die. Your heart stops beating Blood stops pumping Brain no longer has oxygen to think marrow stops making blood thats standard! Now, becoming undead, as a vampire, is a little more complicated. The long and short of it is: your body is FIGHTING ACTIVELY to be alive against all odds and wins every time (immortality), but it hurts the whole way

I have the gist of it. It's like. Your heart stops. By all means, you should be dead. but the magic kicks in, and you're still thinking. Your brain is still sending signals to your muscles to move. But using what oxygen to move? whats burning in you? You don't know but you know it's just enough to get to your next meal. So you ferociously eat something, and then find you can't swallow. You can't make saliva. You barely have the energy to chew, and once you DO get something in your stomach, it immediately comes back up. Why can't you feel your pulse? What's going on? You're out of options so you figure you might as well just lie down and die. You're too tired to keep going anyway. So you do, you lie down, and you close your eyes, and you quietly hope that death is as peaceful as sleep. You realize you've actually been moving around without breathing, which makes sense because you can barely flex your diaphragm for more than a shaky wheeze. How are you thinking with such little oxygen? But as you fade from consciousness, you can feel something in you, and it's so upset, it's crying, it's filled with grief, and you instantly can tell it's your skeleton. It's your bones. You're distraught down to your marrow. You're dying. You're dying! Your heart stopped and you have no more blood! You need blood! You need blood to move! To breathe! To think! You try to breath deep again for the voices in your bones, trying to comfort them, to sooth them with the repetitive motion in your lungs, trying to fill yourself with anything but grief, but they keep wailing. We make the blood, our creation, our child, what we put all of our work into is gone! gone! gone! We need it back! Anything! All of it! Find it! Bring it back to us! We're hungry! WE'RE HUNGRY!

and once you find yourself too exhausted to listen, to think, how badly you wish just to die already to cease hearing this wailing, you find your body moving without you. And it's hungry and it's searching and it's crawling on all fours and it misses its beautiful red life that made it feel so full before and it needs it back, and the next thing you know you're desperately grabbing anything with blood in it and shoving it in your mouth in a desperate attempt to sooth this cry for life, you don't want to die, you don't want to die, you worked so hard to keep up this body and craft it and LIVE with it and you're not going to go, and even when you try, even when you try to lay down and die, your body refuses, it takes the reigns, and it keeps up the work itself with or without your help. And it's not until your stomach is full and your teeth are stained and you feel a pulsating burning in your bones that you snap back awake, completely conscious, just fine. You're lucid, you don't feel any more pain. Everything around you is dead and drained and messy and your heart still isn't beating. but you can breathe now and holy shit you guess you literally need to kill to survive and the less you eat and the more you starve yourself the worse it gets when your body finally decides to take recourse.

my idea was like. "the vampires curse is actually stored in the bones, thats why the teeth get so sharp and also theres a connection between blood and bones with the creation via bone marrow" its literally like i was sitting there thinking "no no no, whats it like to be a vampire. what neurosis would you develop. How would you panic? What are common mistakes beginner vampires make" which, by the way, gordon is a beginner vampire

so now you gotta factor, what blood lasts for how long? how long can you go between meals? not only that, but what creatures satisfy the urge? How long can you go avoiding human blood? Does it work like drugs where you develop a resistance to the high, or is it like food where it will keep you moving until you eat again? How the fuck are you gonna get your hands on blood? Can you just eat raw meat? Does that count? and thats where im at lol

OKAY now. now thoughts on beginning scenes of vampire au

So my idea was this Doomguy is a vampire hunter independent and one of his buds says that some freak scared and almost attacked his daughter when she got too close to his old abandoned laboratory up the hill and hes like “he might be… you know… a problem. if you needed a lead” and guys like yeah i fuckin hate the undead ill kill this dude so he busts into old lab space and sees so many dead animals its actually mostly Bones and pelt that hes seeing piles of feathers etc so hes like yeah this is all telltale signs of vampire uhhh hes introduced to gordon SOMEHOW im not totally sure of the details but the working idea i have is guy falls into a trap gordon devised that restrains him suspended in wire or something and gordon like. limps/stumbles into the room and this dude looks haggard he’s breathing heavy, his cheeks are hollow, he’s bug-eyed and shaking while looking at this massive wall of meat in his trap and he bares a bunch of hideous teeth and grits them and looks like hes really struggling with somethin... Like if these dudes don't know each other then Gordon might give in and try to drain Guy, and Guy would absolutely do anything in his power to turn this new vampire into ash, im thinking the inclusion if g-man as a coven leader can fix both issues.

i like the idea of guy falling into gordons trap and gordon thinking about what to do with him before gman shows up and whisks gordon away for a “meeting” while complimenting him on his good work catching the most feared vampire hunter in the country and gman just leaving guy suspended in wires that he has to fight his way out of. Instant situation defuser.

Guy ends up needing to take care of other monsters before going back to Gordon, and he DOES plan to go back to gordon, because no vampire is a good one, especially not one associated with the fucking head of a coven, but next time he sees Gordon, Gordon helps him out of a scrape by attacking and draining a combine who was going to take Guy out or something and escaping before Guy can catch him, or otherwise seeing Gordon do something good with his insane undead powers and like, the third time he meets up with him is when they can actually talk, and Gordons fuckin SO haggard, he’s not even fighting back and he’s even going as far as to say “just make sure theres nothing of me left when you’re done, I don’t want anyone else getting hurt”

Side Note: Guy has a bunch of scarring on his body from dealing with vampires, cops, ghosts, werewolves, anything violent that kills people. I'm playing with the inkling of an idea that he has Divine Blood in him, so that any time something undead bites him or tries to drink his blood, it burns. We'll see.

Side Note 2: now i really like the idea of the combine actually being an organized faction of vampire hunters that are WICKED crooked and exploit people for all their worth in exchange for their “safety” when they kill a vampire They’re essentially loansharks and Guy fucking hates them and hates the name theyve given to vampire hunting

Side Note 3: You've probably noticed that I haven't said anything about John yet! He's in this too. His species is a surprise but I need to get to him later I have an idea for where he came from (Cortana too)

I still need a good reason for Guy to not instantly kill this vampire, if not it's just gonna be "Gordon Freeman escapes the countrys best vampire hunter like a seventh time" every time they meet and they end up being rivals. And it gives Guy enough time to look past the whole "undead monster" thing and start looking at the "Oh this dude figured out how to fight his ridiculous craving for blood in a way more humane than most and is actually staying out of peoples way and keeping to himself. Guess he's not that big of a threat but I still need to keep an eye on him in case he loses it. Turns out he's got a family (Probably Alyx, Eli, Issac and Barney) who's been lookin for him and cares about him as well, don't wanna hurt them". I like the idea of them ending up needing to team up to take out undead together.

And that's what I got so far!!!

[adonis-koo]

to the moon and back

Summary: Sometimes the distance in relationships really does make a strain and sometimes...it can really make quite the experience, at least in your experience with your boyfriend who only lives half way across the world...

Pairing: Jungkook/Reader, theres like,,,implied Taehyung/Reader if you really squint

Genre: angst, smut,

Word Count: 6.4k

Tags: long distance relationship that I accidentally projected way too much of my own personal experience into 😃, Jungkook just really loves MC, skype sex, I am sorry, mutual masturbation, a little praise kink, Jungkook says baby in korean a lot and once again I am sorry, sex toys, a lil overstim, nothing too crazy tbh, dirty talk, dom!jungkook and sub!MC 🤑

Note: I missed ldr!Jungkook and MC which is based off this sorta imagine I did for them! So I cured it by writing a lil bit about them!! :)

“Hey Jungkook…” 

The said man in question suddenly perked up from where he had been looking down, half his hair tied up and he was rubbing his eyes, he looked tired these days and sometimes you couldn’t help but feel bad. Long distance relationships weren’t always what they were cracked up to be and it wasn’t like you were intentionally looking for a ball and chain at the time...

But well, it was a long night, you were slightly drunk and in a long dry spell so you thought, what the hell? When you signed up for a sub/dom dating website. Again, your intentions weren’t to actually date someone, you were just slightly drunk and horny, and waking up the morning after your phone had been blown up by your now boyfriend. It was innocent at first, you both had a good laugh (to somewhat of your embarrassment) about the whole drunk thing and you were just curious to get to know him. 

It was from there you had learned he lived halfway across the planet in South Korea and not only this but when you began exchanging photos he was by far the most beautiful man you had ever seen. One thing led to another and eventually you both decided to make it official. 

You were used to this of course, you had never actually met him in person and sometimes you felt a little apprehensive to do so, you knew it would hurt Jungkook severely if he ever found out but still...sometimes it felt like you just didn’t know him as much as you wanted too. 

Time zones were a literal hell, by the time you woke up he was getting ready to sleep and most the time texts weren’t sent until the next day, video calls were rare and usually had to wait until the weekend. It sucked. 

Jungkook, if anything, had been trying to convince you to at least fly out to see him, he even offered to pay for your ticket as he was- ahem- apparently in the chain of business for a really well known exports corporation and was a supervisor so he lived very well off in comparison to yourself, who was still in college and buried in debt with little to no money left outside of the expenses of living. 

But again, you were just...nervous...flying by yourself, to a country you had never been too, to meet a man you had never met...You knew realistically everything would be fine, Jungkook was exactly who he said he was, he wasn’t some criminal that was going to murder you and sell your body parts on the black market but…! You just wanted to be safe! To be careful even if that would never happen. 

“Hm?” Jungkook hummed, it was a late saturday night for him but he always stayed up just for you, just to be able to talk to you, to see your face, even if you went hours not talking to one another while he worked and you studied. He told you he just enjoyed looking over at his monitor and seeing you.

Currently you had been curled up on your pillow scrolling on your phone and occasionally admiring your boyfriend’s side profile and strands of hair long hair that fell from his face, “Why did you learn English?”

Jungkook raised his brow a little before suddenly laughing causing you to shift a little in embarrassment feeling as though you had said something dumb, “Well,” He rasped a little, he had been brushing up on his english ever since you started dating but he was also a little self conscious of his accent despite you saying several times over how much you adored it, “English is mandatory to learn in school but I learned extensively due to my family traveling a lot for business and work. I once spent a whole year in New York when my father was employed overseas, that was actually how I became so fluent, classes are fine but experience always teaches best in my opinion....” Jungkook’s lips curled into a smile as he hummed once more, “Which means your studies in Korean would be easier if you visited…” 

Flustered you rolled onto your back as you pressed your pillow against your face, “Jungkook…!” You whined wiggling in your best as you heard his laugh filter through the speaker, “I need you know I really need to stay and study for my finals, it makes up for over forty percent of my grade!” 

“Not even for winter break?” Jungkook let his lips jut into a pout as he laid his chin against his hand, “Jagi I have a bed that’s way too big to sleep in all by myself, are you gonna make me downgrade?” He sighed dramatically as he fell back in his computer chair pulling his hair tie out as his hair fell at his cheeks as he began to fix it. 

You ignored the heat immediately flushing between your legs at the deep rasp of his voice, “My mom’s expecting me to come home to visit for the holidays Koo…” You frowned as you peeped out from behind your pillow to find the massive pout on your boyfriend's face as he sunk in his seat. 

“Sometimes I think you’re just embarrassed to tell people we’re in a relationship,” Jungkook mumbled as he sat up in his seat, running his fingers through his hair as he sulked, obviously trying not to let your rejection make him upset but even through a screen you could always read his moods, sometimes too easily. 

“That is not true!” Your voice was immediately serious as you sat up, fixing your laptop as you set it in front of you, Jungkook was once more slouched in his seat, his hand resting on his cheek as he looked away from the screen, “That is not true Jungkook, I-...” You sighed, “I can’t just drop all my responsibilities here to visit you, you know this, you know hard I’ve been studying for finals and how much my family has been wanting to see me…” 

Jungkook didn’t reply for a moment but you could’ve sworn you heard something akin to a scoff escape his lips, “But you still haven’t told your family...have you?” 

“I haven’t had the chance…” You were immediately trying to defend your reasoning when deep down you felt bad that well...he was right...to a degree, but what were you supposed to tell you family? You met your boyfriend on an offshoot website based around sexual play and not only this but he lived half way around the world. 

“You talk to your mom on the phone weekly Y/n,” The longer Jungkook looked away from the screen the more upset he was getting and you could tell and yet you felt so helpless, it wasn’t like you could just reach over and grab his face, or simply hug him and apologize. Once again, you found yourself at a loss of what to do or say. 

It wasn’t that you wished you hadn’t met Jungkook, you’d never in your life change that night, but sometimes you wished things weren’t so complicated and that your fears wouldn’t get the best of you. And you did speak some truth, even if you weren’t nervous to meet Jungkook in person, it didn’t change the fact that you wouldn’t be able to go now with finals approaching and your family expecting you for the holidays.

“I’m just,” Jungkook inhaled sharply before letting out a sigh, “I just feel so frustrated sometimes, I want to be with you, not part time, half time, or only at night. I want to wake up with you in my arms every single day. And I can’t do that, hell I can’t even get a phone call during the week let alone a text at the same time of day if I’m lucky. We just had a work party where everyone brought their partners and I couldn’t bring mine because she lives in America.” 

His upset was beginning to make you upset, it felt like your gut was being grinded and it wrenched in an unpleasant feeling as you spoke, “Look I’m sorry okay? I can’t help it that this is where I live, I understand you want to be with me, you don’t think I want the same thing?” You put your hand on your chest, trying to keep your voice level as you swallowed harshly, “But right now, I can’t help it Jungkook. The holidays just aren’t a good time right now…” 

“Then what was the excuse during the end of the summer when you weren’t even in school and your parents didn’t want to see you?” Jungkook replied, his jaw clenched and hurt in his eyes as he questioned you, “Or was it still because you were sick in the middle of july?” 

“I just met you!” You cried out now beginning to feel genuinely hurt at your boyfriend questioning the sincerity of your feelings, “I wasn’t going to fly out to Korea to meet someone I had only been talking to for three weeks! Jungkook this is-” 

“I’m not embarrassed to be with you! God, that is literally the last thing on my mind right now! I’m embarrassed at the way we met, I’m embarrassed that I- I somehow have to explain to my family that my boyfriend lives in South Korea and that I’ve never met him and somehow explain to them that you aren’t some serial rapist or human trafficker out to sell my kidney! Because that’s exactly what I’m going to hear! And I’m sorry I just haven’t been ready to deal with that!” You couldn’t even stop the tears from flowing down your face as you pressed your hands to your eyes, “It’s easy for you to talk about us because you’re an adult who lives debt free by himself in his own apartment with your own secure job and you don’t have to answer or deal with anyone, even your own parents! That’s not how it is for me Jungkook.” 

Your head was lowered as you tried to muffle your sobs that was the only thing that filled the loud silence that filtered the air, running your hands through your hair as you took a breath. You could hear a sigh on the other side before Jungkook spoke, “Y/n…” 

“You know what,” You sniffled as you straightened up, “I’m not in the mood to talk anymore,” 

“Y/n! No! Jagi listen-” 

“No I’m done!” You argued back as you wiped your face with the sleeve of your hoody, “I don’t want to talk to you right now. Goodnight.” You clicked the end call button before closing down your laptop. Sitting now, staring at your distinct reflection on the black screen before bursting into a new set of tears. 

Your phone’s ringtone was immediately set off as you sobbed, picking it up as you harshly punched the decline call button before it quickly popped back up on the screen only for you to press it even more vehemently. Your phone lit up several times being flooded with messages from Jungkook trying to convince you to talk to him but you immediately turned off your phone as you collapsed back against your bed, weeping against your pillow as you tried to ignore the pure hurt that filtered your veins despite it being justified. 

God you shouldn’t have even said any of that to Jungkook! Really it was your fault you hadn’t seen him, you had made excuses all because you were just scared. He was probably going to break up with you now...Squeezing your pillow tight you closed your eyes as you muffled your sobs. 

“Girl why are you staring at your phone?” Lisa sighed in exasperation, “Don’t tell me…Oh shit…” She sighed as she watched your eyes begin to pitfully water, “What was it this time?” 

“I’m a horrible person be-because I can’t just fucking suck it up and tell my family about my boyfriend and- and I can’t just go visit him!” You were already wiping your eyes despite not even crying yet and you refused to ruin your mascara in a public store. The bookstore was quiet as ever and the barista who worked the cafe was still sorting magazines out on the rack not even paying attention to you both but still you had to keep up your ideals or else you’d be crying all the time. 

“You are not a horrible person oh my god!” Lisa raised her brows before scoffing, she pointed a long acrylic nail at you as she spoke, “That boy needs to calm his hormones, you are strapped for the rest of the holidays. Y/n! Come on, seriously you need to draw some boundaries with him! Just be honest and it’s going to save you both a lot of trouble.” 

You sunk in your seat as your lips began to tremble making Lisa sigh, “How many messages did he send this time?” 

“Twenty four.” You mumbled. 

“Jesus Christ.” Lisa groaned as she pressed her hand against her forehead, her bangs which had been melded together with hairspray not even moving an inch, “What even started this fight!?” 

Lisa was not only your closest friend but most times she was also your voice of reason which you knew was most times right but still you couldn’t help but feel embarrassed as you twirled your straw that poked through the lid of your iced coffee, “Well it was innocent at first, I just asked him why he learned English when he was younger and it translated into him saying experience taught him best which meant going to Korea would help me with my own language studies.” 

“Why can’t you just be honest with him!? Seriously! Y/n!” She gave you her premium disappointed look as you whined, kicking your feet as you covered your hands over your face knowing she was right, but!

“That would literally crush him!” You replied feeling defeated as you slumped in your seat once more, sighing as sadness filled you, “It feels like…” You poked your tongue into your cheek as you exhaled in frustration, “No matter how hard I try, I just always end up hurting him. Jungkook would be so hurt if he knew my main reason for not wanting to see him.” 

Lisa raised her brows as she scoffed, “No he would not! If he’s so desperate to jump on your pussy he’ll come to America and not only meet you but he’ll be meeting me as well the first time. This relationship is a two way street Y/n-” 

“He has a whole team he’s managing Lisa, he’s told me he’d visit if he could schedule the time off but-” 

“All I hear is an excuse,” Lisa clacked her tongue, “Fair is fair, you’re just being cautious as anyone should be when they’re talking to someone over the internet,” She curved a brow before snorting as she sipped her drink, “Now listen, do I think he’s a kidnapper that’s gonna kill you? No. Do I think he’s a fuckboy that just really wants to smash you? Maybe, it’s your relationship. Do what you want but regardless of whether your reasoning is legit he should respect it regardless.” 

You deflated as you sighed, scrolling through his messages where he had profusely apologized several times and went on to explain that he just really wanted to be with you and never meant to dismiss your feelings on the matter. You hadn’t replied yet which made you feel even worse but truthfully, you just really wanted to talk to see him tonight on a video call and talk things over. 

“Anyways, it’s time to boss up bitch,” Lisa pulled out the three textbooks from her bag before dropping them on the table as she offered a smile, “We got finals to prep for, we’re in the two week countdown so we need to cram as much as possible.” 

Sighing you glanced down at your phone one last time before turning it off knowing the temptation to look over Jungkook’s messages would be too tempting. Putting your phone away you pulled out your notebook along with your own textbooks as you nodded, “You’re right, it’ll at least take my mind off of it…” 

You could only hope. 

You had spent the last ten minutes trying to gas yourself up, Jungkook had stopped texting around lunch time having obviously given up and giving you space as this wasn’t the first time something like this had happened and he knew if he just gave you time you’d eventually reach out to him. 

Like right now, except you felt severely embarrassed for your actions this morning and you knew you could have handled things in a better and more mature way then you had, regardless you were struggling to even send a text at the moment let alone video call him...Checking the clock on your phone you sighed, it was already 1pm in Seoul....

Jungkook if anything was probably on his computer sulking while playing video games as he usually did on his weekends off when he wasn’t talking to you. Sucking in a breath you knew you needed to talk to him now because if you didn’t you’d have to go the whole week with stale texts that never went over well and you weren’t working with much to begin with, you didn’t want to make it worse. Sighing, you sat down on your bed as you began to type.

[10:25]

‘I’m sorry I haven’t replied to any of your messages :( can you video right now?’

You chewed on your lip anxiety immediately spiking in your head as you wondered if you came across too much like a victim...Or maybe you should’ve just not mentioned the not replying to his messages and just asked if- 

You nearly jumped out of your skin at the sound of the skype call sounding with Jungkook’s name under it, grabbing your chest you collapsed onto the bed as you made yourself comfortable, shying away from the camera as you grabbed your pillow in insecurity before accepting the call. 

“I really am sorry Jagi,” You couldn’t even open your mouth before Jungkook’s worried expression showed up on your laptop, the hoodie covering his head and just as you expected his puppy like eyes were glossed and filled with sadness, “I- I didn’t realize how much stress you were under and I shouldn’t have been so careless. This is the only time during the week that I get to see you and I really don’t want to argue…” 

You curled up against your pillow as you mumbled, “I should be the one apologizing, I know how much it means to you for us to be able to see each other in person and I need to make the time for us to be able to do that it’s just…” You had meant to tell him the truth but- “I just have a lot going on right now but I didn’t mean to take that out on you, I know you just want us to be together...” 

“Oh jagiya,” Jungkook sighed, longing filled his face and his fingers twitched a little as they ran through his hair as if wishing he could just hold you close to him, “It’s okay, I’m just glad you wanted to talk. I didn’t want the whole week to drag by without being able to talk to you, you know you always make my day better…” 

And just like that your chest blossomed with warmth as you curled up, hiding the smile that began to creep on your lips as you squeezed your pillow, “Not as much as you make my day. Especially when you send those tease pictures for me right before I need to go to bed.” You would never get enough of that addictive feeling of talking to Jungkook, his smile was always infectious.

And just like that you watch, just like every other time, in amazement at the way Jungkook’s personality switches like a light, the innocent sweet smile that was once on his lips is suddenly twisted into a cocky smirk and he leans back his chair, his long hair is slightly messy but just enough to make him look truly wicked, “Oh? Is that right gongjunim? I thought you’d appreciate it?” 

Said photo in question was sent thursday night when you were prepping for bed and Jungkook had very obviously just gotten out of the shower in the mirror selfie he had sent that displayed the chiseled abdomen and broad chest and not to mention the….ahem package he was sporting beneath the thin towel that he had purposely clutched with his free hand. 

Yeah...that nearly destroyed your right hand. 

“Well I did…” You immediately coiled up, no matter how many times this happens with your boyfriend- which is nearly every weekend, you always end up getting shy despite your thighs furiously pressing together and wetness building up in your panties, “Maybe a little too much…” 

Jungkook pressed his tongue into his cheek as his smirk widened, just his stare made you press your face into the pillow as you heard his chuckle, “What? What did you do?” 

The fact that he skipped to the golden question made you whine as you kicked your feet, you could hear another laugh from him as you curled up once more, “You know…” You mumbled, feeling your face burn as you pressed it against the pillow. 

“No baby I don’t.” Jungkook pouted but his voice rasped and something about saying baby in english with that accent of his had your fingers twitching as he puffed a breath of air in cockiness as he hummed, “Why don’t you tell me hm?” 

Shifting against the bed you shook your head, “You know what I’m talking about…” 

“Do I?” Jungkook challenged as he raised a brow, his beginning to clench as he slipped into his dominant headspace, tucking his tongue into his cheek as he asked, “If you can’t use your words would you rather show me? Be a good girl and show me, yeah?” 

Your words were muffled as you replied, “I had help…” Your face felt like it was practically on fire as you rubbed your legs together as you heard him laugh, “Then be a good girl and go get it jagiya, I’ll still be here.” You gave Jungkook a good laugh as you nearly scrambled out of bed to get your bullet vibrator off it’s charger before diving back on the bed making your laptop bounce as you sat up right. 

Jungkook meanwhile had pulled off his sweatshirt and repositioned his camera to expose his lower body, the familiar sight of his plump cherry lips exposed in that forever tainted smirk as he made himself comfortable in his chair, his thighs spreading apart and the indent in his sweats showing off proudly, “Good girl kitty, now I want you to take off your clothes, all of it.” 

You wiggled in your comfy sweatshirt feeling a little shy as you began to shed your clothes, “The bra too baby,” Jungkook coaxed as he licked his lips, his cock tightening and becoming harder at the sight of your flustered, shy expression as you unhooked your bra, there was nothing more this man wanted then to suckle on your nipples that immediately hardened against the chilled air of the room. 

Jungkook’s hand found its way to his bulge as he palmed himself through his grey sweats, “Panties too baby, I know you’re shy but you need to be a good girl and take them off. And remember your words.” He added with a low growl. 

“...Yes sir.” You mumbled, feeling chilly and exposed to nothing more then the camera on your laptop and Jungkook of course before you pulled off the panties you wore, arousal sticking to the fabric that stringed before you tossed them aside, your eyes unable to stay off his hand that kept stroking his bulge. 

“Good girl,” His lips twitched into a sadistic smile, “Now spread your legs jagiya and show me what you did to that photo I sent you, every little detail baby.” You whined as you looked away from the camera, “Jagiya…” Jungkook’s voice deepened a little in warning, “Are you gonna make me get out the controller?” 

Outwardly you’d completely deny that but inwardly....The idea nearly had you frothing out the mouth, but reluctantly you did as he asked, the chilled air nipping at your exposed warm wet folds had your levels of arousal that much higher and you could hear a soft verbal moan from Jungkook as he squeezed his hand over his cock, “Shibal,” He muttered a few other words in korean that you could only half make out before he spoke once more, “You’re so fucking wet baby. Play with yourself, don’t make me wait.” 

Tenderly you slipped your hand between your thighs, flinching a little at the cold that seeped from your fingers that met in opposition to the heat radiating off your cunt, arousal met your fingertips as you dragged them up you slit before rubbing slow circles around your clit, your lips parting a little at the idea of it being his fingers doing this to you.

Jungkook let out a little scoffed laugh, licking his lips as he pulled down his sweats just enough to free his throbbing cock, a sight you’d never fully get used too and had your mouth watering at just the sight. He was much thicker then he was long but he certainly wasn’t short, the vein on the underside of his cock displayed and you could even see his tip beginning to weep as it became red, “How bad do you wish those were my fingers playing with that little clit baby? Put those fingers inside your cunt baby,lay back and use your toy to make yourself feel good for me.

Situating your laptop before you laidback, opening your legs once more as you began to transition to your subspace as you closed your eyes, imagining his fingers dragging up your inner thighs. 

Letting your eyes open you whined at the sight of lube slipping from his cock as his hand slowly pumped his shaft, his lips parted at the sight of one finger slipping inside your cunt before pulling out and adding a second finger. You could just imagine those long thick fingers filling you up while fitting up against your g-spot. 

Fumbling with your vibrator you turned it on, switching the setting to a low pattern before carefully placing it on your aching bud. You had anticipated your reaction just as you did everytime and yet every time you still jolted, your walls tightly squeezing around your fingers as a whined squeak escaped your lips. 

“Fuck princess that’s it,” Jungkook edged you on, his tongue in his cheek as his hand squeezed around his cock before he used his free hand to grab his own toy, the fleshlight that nearly always turned you into a mess, “Bet that little hole can hardly fit your own fingers let alone my big fat cock, right baby? Yeah?” 

Your thighs were twitching as pleasure was rapidly buzzing against your clit and your walls kept squeezing around your fingers as you desperately tried to reach to your g-spot in need for an orgarsm to make up for all the anxiety and stress you had been under the whole day, “Yes! Yes sir! Ah- Mmph need you! Fuck, please! Sir.” You whimpered as your hips jolted to fuck back against your fingers.

 Jungkook pushes the opening of the flashlight over his tip as he let out a soft moan, his hips fluidly began thrusting to the point your walls were so tight you could hardly move your fingers just at the idea of his cock forcing its way inside you, you just knew this mans stroke game was good and proved it every fucking time he took out that toy.

Watching his cock disappear with every thrust inside his toy as his lips parted a little wider this time, “You want this baby? You wish this was your pussy I’m fucking nice and deep?”

Your body was too excited for all of his dirty talk as you squirmed shifting the buzzing vibrator to the sweet spot of your clit as you squeaked, trying to keep yourself from being too loud as your roommate was home, “Want it! Want it so fucking bad! Please sir! Sir!”

You were embarrassingly horny and this made worked you up every single time, your hips we’re stumbled and your walls were rapidly clenching in excitement as his thick cock rocking it’s way in and out of the toy that you could just imagine was your pussy he was fucking nice and slow, making you feel his nice fat cock with every killer slow thrust.

“Oh Jagiya,” Jungkook moaned out, “Don’t tell me my kitten is already close?” He chuckled as he watched the way your body withered the way it always did when you were close, his eyes feasting on the way your pussy was stretched so delicately against your small fingers and the way your thighs clenched and your feet kicked, “Do you need to cum so soon?” 

“Please! Please! Sir! I- I don’t think I can-“ Your thighs clamped together as your lips fell open, unable to even wait for his blessing as your orgasm ripped through your body, your toes curling as little whimpers escaped you, you could hear a long moan from Jungkook as you liddedly watched his hips stumble against his flesh light, hand running through his hair while he fumbled something in Korean. 

“Baby fuuck,” Jungkook’s voice lowered as he moaned, “Cum again princess, cum for me baby I wanna hear you make those noises again for me. Keep those little fingers stuffed inside yourself.” Jungkook’s hips kept stuttering against his toy, his cock throbbing desperate as his moans became breathy at the sight of you obeying him. You were always such a good girl.

Your fingers were aching but your desire to watch him come undone was even greater as you began pushing your fingers back against your g-spot once more, feathery whines escaping you at the feeling of pain beginning to mix with pleasure at the consistent thrum of the vibrator against your clit.

“Ah! S-sir…!” You whimpered quietly as your walls suddenly clamped around your fingers once more, “I- ah! I don’t think I can…!” 

“Yes you can,” Jungkook growled his hips bucking up into his toys faster his cock throbbing and squeezing in pleasure at the sight of your arousal slipping from your soaked cunt and the sight of your tits bouncing at the way your body kept squirming, he could only imagine what it would be like fucking you tied up and left to his mercy, “And you will,” He snapped with command, “You’re gonna be a good girl and cum for me again princess. I wasn’t fucking asking.” 

Your legs immediately twitched and your breath hitched as you cried out, your back arching at the way your body listened to him so easily on command, your walls tightening around your fingers rapidly and pleasure seered into your clit as the orgasm roughly filled your body, “Ah Jungkook! Fuck, fuck, fuck…! Fuck! Ooh!” Moans escaped you louder then you intended as your hips desperately fucked into your fingers to ride the powerful orgasm you experienced.

Jungkook moaned softly as his hips bucked one last time into his toy before cum was filling it up at the idea of milking all of himself in your little warm cunt, letting his hips swivel as he milked every last drop of cum from his cock as he moaned before relaxing back in his chair.

Chuckling a little at watching your lower body scramble at your vibrator continuing to drill against your over stimulated clit as you struggled to turn it off, “Take your fingers out baby, I wanna see them.” Jungkook licked his lips as you obeyed him, pulling your fingers from your cunt to reveal the thick layer of arousal and cum on them nearly making Jungkook’s mouth water with the desire to lick every drop off your fingers, this man couldn’t even describe what he’d do to go down on you.

“Ah fuck, jagiya,” Jungkook laughed, a little flustered at the way you sat up, looking directly into the camera before putting your fingers in your mouth, licking off the salty and somewhat musky taste of your arousal which in your opinion wasn’t that great and Jungkook would never accept your opinion on the matter, “You’re gonna make me hard all over again.” He whined as he carefully pulled the toy off his cock, feeling the white substance already rolling down his softening shaft to reveal the mess he had made.

You giggled a little, feeling shy once more as you stood up with wobbling legs, “I don’t have to help with that.” You called out, grabbing your favorite sweatshirt to pull over your body. It was your favorite because...Well because Jungkook had sent it to you and because it was big on him it was massive on you. 

You absolutely adored it, coming back in view you collapsed onto your bed as you curled up, Jungkook had just finished cleaning himself up, fixing his camera for you to see the beautiful radiant smile and eyes light up that was your boyfriend. He always had that dreamy look in his eyes while looking at you everytime you finished having Skype sex and everytime it always made you shy as you grabbed your pillow and curled up.

“You’re always so fucking good baby,” He groaned as he ran a hand through his hair, his smile permanently on his face as he stared in adoration at your curled up figure that was practically buried in his sweatshirt, “Mmm you were such a good girl too, your eyes were rolling to the back of your head when I told you to cum again.” 

He had a boyish laugh at the way you curled up, “Stoop! You know I was already overstimulated, you better hope my roommate didn’t hear anything…!” You covered your face in embarrassment at the realization you were a little loud.

Jungkook’s face stiffened a little at the mention of your roommate before he tried to play it off with a small laugh, “Yeah well, what’s he gonna do about it anyways? You were just being my good little girl jagiya.” You covered your face in semi embarrassment. You knew Jungkook was redirecting the conversation back to verbal aftercare because you knew he didn’t like the fact that your roommate was a guy who was not only your age but also very attractive. 

It wasn’t like Taehyung was ever interested in you, but you had mentioned to Jungkook when you first started talking that you used to have a crush on him. You felt as though some days that still lingered in Jungkook’s mind despite the fact that you didn’t even look at Taehyung twice anymore.

Especially since you and Jungkook became an item, however you also hadn’t told Jungkook that Taehyung had been...Well you weren’t sure what he was doing to be honest outside a few innuendos and winks. It mainly weirded you out as he had never paid any attention to you but regardless. This wasn’t about your roommate, this was about your amazing, handsome boyfriend who somehow managed to make you cum twice just by the sound of his voice, not everything could do that.

“You make it difficult to try and disobey.” You mumbled as a smile tugged in your lips, closing your eyes at the idea of his arms wrapped tight around you and his forehead pressed against your own, you could almost feel his warm breath against your face and his lips pressing against your forehead.

“Mmm id like to see you try,” Jungkook laughed as he leaned back his seat, letting out a content sigh as he spoke, “I’d make you wear those vibrating panties the whole day after making you overestimate yourself and I’d make sure to wake up every hour just to hold that button for three minutes straight.” 

“You’re so mean!” You whines as you fluttered your feet before crawling under your covers as you yawned, “You’re already planning a punishment when I haven’t even done anything wrong.” 

“I’m not!” Jungkook laughed as he objected, moving his hair from his face, “I’m just telling you what would’ve happened if you weren’t obedient. I mean, that’s not always a bad thing baby.” He sent a wink your way that immediately made your cheeks warm as you pressed your face against the blanket with a giggle.

“I can’t do that over a video call…! Maybe if you were here in my bed I’d be a little more defiant.” You always had a hard time trying to flirt confidently but Jungkook always ate it up every single time you threw him a crumb.

“Jagiya if you can’t be defiant over a call what makes you think you’d manage it when I’m between your legs sucking the soul out of your pussy?” Jungkook was immediately cackling at the way you shoved your face into your pillow with a whine, “Exactly baby, you can’t even look at me right now.” He cooed out.

“Well maybe I’m just a little more bold in person.” You challenged, peeping out from behind your pillow making Jungkook chuckle as he shook his head, his eyes filled with adoration as he leaned back in his seat.

“Well sweetheart I’ll just have to see for myself one day huh?” Jungkook’s smile was so beautiful, it was arguably one of your favorite features as he spoke, “You know I love you to the moon and back jagiya.”

“Well I love you love you to the stars and beyond,” You whispered back as you hugged your pillow close, closing your eyes sleepily as you smiled….One day...Hopefully you’d overcome your anxiety soon to make the one day become soon, you weren’t sure how much longer you could stand being apart from the one person who would never stop making your day.

[ohbae-me]

okay so, im about to go ham because i truly stand strong in my shoujo fantasy.

In my opinion, im pretty sure (like 89%) lucifer tells us that whenever mammon breaks off a relationship with someone, they go broke completely after. so hes had previous relationships before, as for the rest of the boys, im pretty sure lucifer has, but nothing serious, he wont let anyone in, MC is literally the only person who has pushed past his walls and seen him for more than pride. satan, 100% he has never had a relationship, levi, has had a couple of fwbs and other relationships but they always fizzle out, never lasting. asmo has never had a serious relationship, always just flings. belphie never had a serious relationship and same with beel. i truly believe MC is their first true loves, i know what youre thinking "theyve been alive for so long, theres no way someone couldnt have been special to them" but the thing is, theyre so different with MC; their entire dynamic and relationships changed with MC, MC saw them for more than their sin and got to know them to their very core, while yes the other relationships never lasted, thats not to say the boys didnt love them; but just not in the way they love MC. i believe MC to be a true love, not just a love, the difference for me is all of the boys would gladly give up chasing MC once she finds herself happy with another brother, instead of forcing them to choose yk? the "as long as youre happy, it kills me everytime i look at you smile at him, but i love you too much to let you be miserable with me" and i dont think any of them have experienced. also, with the whole "new relationship" thing, the honey moon phase, while yes every couple has it, i feel like with MC it would just, last. not to say they wouldnt have fights; ofc they would, but its different with MC, everyday the brothers would wake up and chose the option to love and fall in love all over again, speaking further on that, i dont think any of them would truly get over MC. and i mean that; (i dont think MC is going to die, obey me devs have something planned LOL, plus theyre super powerful, like the other anon said i dont think theyd be able to really function without them, even if they do "get over" mcs death at some point.) after MC dies i feel like the family dynamic wouldnt be the same, the brothers would get quieter and would never truly forget about it? and every relationship would fail because theyre not MC (you dont have to agree but i love reverse harems), like i 100% hc that after MC chooses another brother or after they die, mammon would try and try to find new flings, even after its been decades mammon finds someone whos super similar to MC, their look, personality, etc, but one wrong move and theyre out. (say MC doesnt like pickles, but the replacement for MC does, he would immediately start crying and call mc a stupid human who he shouldnt have fallen for.) anyways in conclusion, i truly dont think MC would ever die canonically in the obey me game, the devs are sneaky (love you devs), but even if they would, i really feel like they would never get truly over it. some part of me truly believes that the brothers would go back to being distant, how they were before. they would sit at the table and eat in silence, asmo would begin partying ten times harder (since we already know he uses his ego to cover up his major insecurity of people not liking him and how he feels about himself) and the brothers would become even more indugled in their sin. also, for every relationship they would have, they would just compare them to MC, and yeah but I cannot see MC dying. the other stuff about what the brothers would be like after MC dies could also be applied to when MC chooses her s/o. i think the brothers would be super fucking hurt, that was their first love, their first understanding who walked out and chose someone who wasnt them. anyways thats all, you dont have to reply i just felt like i needed to get this off of my chest, also im gonna be pretty frequent on your blog ( i love ur writing ) so im gonna call myself cake anon! have a great day! - cake anon

Hello Cake! iluuu! Thanks for this, i really love getting every ones take on these things! And there is defs a lot that i agree with here. 

I agree with the Mammon part. Out of all of the brothers, i feel he is probably the easiest to get emotionally attached in a relationship, so i see him as the one with the most previous relationships. Asmo coming in second, but his being mostly flings or poly/open relationships. I’m sure Mammon has had some serious ones as well as many flings, where Asmo’s have never been overly serious and certainly never long lasting. I’m also sure Luci has had a few, some more serious than others, but he wouldn’t get overly attached emotionally. I’m sure he’d be too busy with Diavolo since arriving, being the workaholic he is. I’m sure not many partners would be willing to deal with that level of non-commitment and emotional unavailability from him.Levi I feel like all his relationships never left that awkward early stage, and his only ‘serious’ relationships would have been strictly online, maybe a couple meetups that made him nope right out of it. Satan, again, has probably just gone on some casual dates but didn’t have much interest in actually dating rather than gaining connections. i feel like Beel is the most likely candidate to have had healthy previous relationships. He is pretty well balanced emotionally and has a good outlook on love and family values. I’m sure he’s had a few serious relationships and has dated his share of people. Belphie gives me vibes of had one or two previous serious relationships that did not end well at all and now he’s a salty sob over it lmao. 

I still don’t feel like MC is necessarily their first true love, but maybe the first different kind of love for them. MC has reached them in ways no one else has, they don’t try to change anything, they fit in well with the whole family, they understand their sins etc. I have loved a few different people in my life, and each one was such a different experience for me. The first guy i loved, i consider to be my first true love. However, it didn’t work. And then i met the man I eventually married, he wasn’t my first true love, but it was a better kind of love, yk? 

And uugghh you ripped my heart out with how the brothers would feel if MC chose a different brother!!!! Because they all would be so heartbroken it’s not them, but they really truly just want mc to be happy and cared for, and they know their brother would keep them safe and provide well. 

A few asks ago, i mentioned that the brothers would move on eventually. I think there is a big difference in moving on and getting over that I maybe didn’t articulate very well. If MC were to die or choose someone else, they would move on eventually, but they might not ever really get over it. My heart hurts just thinking about how they would feel trying to move on. Like you mentioned, the empty, quiet dinner tables, lackluster parties and festivals, it would be like they lost their best friend. (i giggled picturing your mammon scenario with the pickle because that’s exactly how he’d react to something so small lmaooo)

I also agree that i don’t think the devs will kill mc off (again), that just seems like a really crappy way to end the game!! I’m curious to see how they would make different routes go if you can only romance one of them end game, vs you being able to have them all? I wonder if we’d get a choice in the whole becoming immortal thing or not? 

Sorry if this reply was too long and rambly, i absolutely love discussing these kinds of things!! I always welcome these asks!!! 

[macgyvertape]

50 or so hours into Cyberpunk 2077

This should be roughly the correct amount of time, ive been leaving the game running as I get up to get food or do stretches. Quests are roughly in order I did them

non spoilers above cut:

 i haven't found a single hat/helmet i like, and since you can't hide them I just am not wearing any. It matters that much.

I posted the other day about bugs, every few hours I play I find new bugs. some require me to go back and reload a save others I honestly can’t tell if it’s a bug or just really poor development

there are several perks that don’t quite do what the description says, like the Anamesis perk. Based on reddit and trying it out it seems to just not do anything.

sometimes in car chase segments the passenger will say “look out” as cars spawn in my path and hit me. Can’t tell if that was deliberate or a pop in issue

Yeah I’ve just totally given up on doing pacifist things unless required by a mission. Given up on doing stealth too unless a mission objective, except for sneaking around to set up a fight.

:readmore:

the delemain car quest is fun. From the shock of the one going "beep beep motherfucker" and doing a hit and run to start it off, to the GLADOS car i see a lot of people talking about. It was fun to explore the city when i might have missed places like the landfill apparently there is follow up on T-bug's death if you go back to the quick hack shop in Kabuki. It's not much but better than nothing I made the pass with Panam of "what if the room just had one bed". I know she won't do a wlw romance, which is fine since I wouldn’t have chosen her.  I enjoy her as a character, don’t get me wrong, my V considers her as a friend, but it seems like theres always drama going on which would be tiring. I would have gone for a fling, i like her leotard-pants combo with all the straps

but also her questline was buggy as hell. Multiple cases of having to reload due to clipping into objects, including her in a driving section, or just insta-dying when collision physics with some rocks broke "your neural network can no longer function independantly of the chip" me slapping my desk: s y m b i o te!!! come on lets have some s y m b i o s i s

in the scene with hellman i really liked how Johnny moved around the room. It made him feel like he was really there. it was hard to follow the convo as I left the room, i would not have understood it without subtitles. But i guess Takemura fucking waterboarded hellman. :|

lol I hope the dialogue is different b/c i refuse to smoke for Johnny

i am level 18 and still can't beat the first opponents in the fist fighting quest. ffs

I looked up the romances options so I went to do the I fought the law quest as soon as i got it. ACAB, but like I literally just met River Ward 2 minutes ago, and I really like him. His earring and cyborg eye, his big fluffy coat. I'm definitely gonna sleep with him Ok i like how when River Ward is dealing with the tiger claws if you interject it leads to a fight. It goes better if you follow his instructions and let him deal with it. Seriously I enjoy that sometimes its good to not pick a dialogue choice.

during the red queen club part, there was no dialogue over the phone. So i reloaded a save and got myself spotted and attacked. Then River showed up to help me <3 and it was more enjoyable having him there. I honestly am not sure if him not going to the club level is bug or not.

then uuuuuugh the worst of irl police "cops are my family" from Detective Han. Again ACAB "FRATERNITY OF CITY COPS RESEMBLES A [Nomad] CLAN NOT AT ALL" ok a few minutes ago i was complaining about bugs, but the character modeling in this game is good (when they're there). You can see body posture, characters jiggle their legs when they are nervous. Like I though character A was just throwing a cigarette on the ground, but then character B flinches back; I realize Char A threw it at B as a fuck you

I'm honestly curious if "I fought the Law" quest will have any impact later on. My choices were that I thought there was more going on than Holt being the only person behind this (based on how complicated the main questline heist is, and keeping an eye on some of the in game news), and told him not to take it to internal affairs, and I loved his response of how he doesn't give a shit what we think, he's doing it anyway.

In the elevator to report in, Johnny said "this muck is deeper than you think, tell them nothing", so i just said that the case was complicated. anyway i love how much of a sarcastic asshole V is

I thought i was being nonlethal with the monk quest, but it seems i accidently killed someone. RIP, but thats kind of the problem with this game. Like when i do the non lethal cyberpychosis quests I equip my non lethal modded gun and hope for the est. I like how a go here kill things quest led to Charles the ripperdoc. He's getting all his parts from scav gang members so I felt obligated to take him out. I got a police bounty for it but w/e.

I merged the Delemain fragments with the whole. Guess he's the meta now. (Side note: some of my favorite rvb fanfic plots are Ai consiousness/memory merging with the humans, so I’m having fun with this game and look foward to introspective fanfic)

Honestly Jonny made some good points, the fragments didn't deserve to die; but also destroying the core and freeing the fragments, they couldn't really function alone.

I was able to rescue Saul fine with stealth. Using cameras and the synapse overload really made it easy.  Can't use the sniper rifle reward b/c I don't have the stats for it, and while it has a silencer the fact that it's a ricochette weapon and not a shoot through walls weapons, makes it not as good imo; and theres a legendary one that is stats free for only 100k.

Lol made a pass again at Panam, and she immediately shut me down. I then did Mitch's quest and I love every time someone tells V they area  good person.

I hacked the operation carpe noctem shard, and wow the corporations are using ai to make people have cyberpsychosis, or something like that. What a shocker /s, I've played Deus Ex HR before

lol driving through the unifinished interstate, past the fight from Panam's first quest I found a "batcave" with a very nice car, and a manifesto written by "muckman'. But here's my complaint about the loot, there is a legendary top, but it had 16 armor. My current top has 84 armor, like why would i switch?? then later i found a bunker with soviet spies in it. Wild

Doing River's second quest, love the timing of as soon as you ask, why are we breaking in, someone shows up to tell you he got kicked off the force. It's funny how Johnny comments how maybe River's into you, and V just doubts Johnny's words. Love how the first kid asks River if I'm his girlfriend. also wow like oof both the second parts of Judy and River's quest are SUPER fucked UP!! oof like i stopped doing first person mode on the braindances for those quests as soon as i could, just made me too uncomfortable seeing that in first person.

DRIVING IN THE GAME IS BAD! nowhere is it more apparent than the sinnerman quest, which took me 3 times to get the driving section done, as cars spawned out of nowhere to hit me. Then when you restart, there is a bunch of dialogue it doesn't let you fast forward through. The rest of the Sinnerman questline is interesting. My V took every option to tell the dude that he was messed up, and what he was doing was wrong. idk, I was surprised how much dialogue there was that let you buy into his whole "forgiveness thing" and how there wasn't any real dialogue to call him the fuck out, that in seeking forgiveness he continues to do harm both emotional to the mother of the man he killed, but also that he got the husband killed via cop. The later follow up quest, I told him that what he is doing is crazy, studio is just going to profit off this vid. Then I refused to join him prayer, and told him fuck no i wasn't going to hammer him to the cross, or even watch. Yes, the man is scared of dying, and the corporation is exploiting him, but he keeps creating burdens for others.  I think the discussion on this quest will be interesting to read, it's definitely my own personal experience with religion coloring my view. Anyway back to a main quest, yeah i don't trust Placide, especially in that scene where he grabs my hand, then jacks in. I ran off to do most of the sidequests here and got some criticism from him. I do love how in the cinema the western movie switches to a mission brief as the netwatch agent talks. its a fun enviromental detail.  I took the netwatch offer, i don't think he's being fully honest with me, but he didn't put a virus in my head. As I told Placide later, I didn't pick a side. I like how you can then talk with the agent, who is a fan of Western movies, b/c they show "a simpler time where all good guys carry badges" :eyeroll:, and then V recommends Unforgiven, which from the wiki summary goes against that theme.

Looks like the Voodoo boys all got killed by Netwatch, but I as revenge for them trying to set me up I'm fine with it. Honestly after speaking with ai!Alt I don’t believe their plan of trying to be on good relations with AI would work. 

doing the johnny flashback 2, and wow Johnny really is an asshole. Like I had gotten so used to him in side missions I forgot how self centered and unlikable he was.You constantly get prompts to drink or do drugs, which I ignored. But i do love the goth/punk love Rogue and others have.

lol i called it, when Hellman said that the engram would seek to override the host, put V on the engram. I really like how as the relic malfunctions, you wind up in the chair with a cigarette, which you can either smoke and say you are turning into Johnny or throw away. My dialogue "your problem is the ends justify the means", which is true!!! He and Rogue detonated a nuke downtown, does anyone know that, and like ask Rogue about it????

(Funny you can ask Rouge about Johnny silverhand, over the phone, then the game bugs out and spawns her npc where you are. She doens't say much about the nuke, but she does say no one trusts you for jobs). The line of no one trusting you for jobs is pretty funny at level 46 street cred where im at “respected” status. really loving the family atmosphere at River's 3rd quest. Also his big strong arms, and the fact he is no longer a cop. I totally let the kids win, and wow the family dinner where they GRILL YOU over the relationship and try to set the two of you up, then the water tower scene!!!!! I don't love the first person sex cutscenes but they do have personality. I'm glad afterwards you got to tell River about the biochip and that you might die. Because he's so far removed from your personal plot. So I took that option to back out of a relationship.

I do love that you wake up with "river's tanktop" that says "fuck the police" It actually has extremely good armor stats, so thats what I'll wear now.

panam 3rd quest, when shes like why did you help me, I'm like "because it's important to you". Basically the closest you can get to "when a friend asks for help you help them", which as an ex-nomad backstory I really choose the nomad options when ever i can Paralezes quest part 2! I love the piano song but I always think of it as ocean's 11 music. It's also fun to see the computer and see Judy recommended you for the first quest. The emails talk about "forgetting" to hire a staffer, on the balocony a strange antennia was scannable, the color of the roses was remembered wrong...  lol guess i was right with those giant wall screens. Its fun environmental details that spell things out before you can notice, and it ties into some other quests where people's behavior is being altered. Actually, this quest "Dream On" I love it! For a while I've been like "wheres the illuminati conspiracy! Here it IS! I chose to follow Elisabeth's wishes and not tell her husband he was being brainwashed. In best case they program him to forget again, in worst case he ends up dead. The gaslighting Elisabeth described is CHILLING, her husband describes a vacation she can't remember and she doesn't know whose memories have been messed with. On your way to the plaza you get a call from someone/something that says the know exactly WHAT you are, any you black out!!! It's such a great feeling of helplessness that you're just one person in a world so big that you can't fight every power. As Johnny said, could be a corporation, could be a rogue ai, either way Jefferson is fucked (and so are you).

[wizisbored]

What are some of your favorite lines you've written for your fics? (Also I'm sorry things aren't going well right now. Sending love 💜)

right its time to go diggin im using this as an excuse to reread everything because i cant think of any lines off the top of my head even though i know theres a shitton

premptively putting a cut here because this will probably end up long as shit and you know what fuck yea to that because fuck yea to being proud of what youve made

SO

hallelujah, first thing i posted:

If those bastards want to make her part of their shitty musical, then she’s going to make it difficult. Or at least inconvenient.

The hive is not inconvenienced in the slightest.’

- idk if this is as funny as i think it is but i find it funny

"Nobody dies with dignity, Emma. There's no honour in the thing, however you dress it up."

- wrote that to sound creepy and now i cant decide whether i actually think its true

But he’s holding her like she’s his salvation, as if it’s his life hanging in the balance.

- salvation is just a good word tbh

It’s hopeless, but she refuses to be killed by a game of fucking ‘got your nose’.

purgatory, intended to be a shitpost but now i unironically think of it as the best thing ive ever written

After a few years (or maybe seconds, it’s not clear) / it takes a moment (or maybe it doesn’t, who knows?) / An undocumentable amount of time passes. /  They might have slipped into an uneasy silence lasting millenia - or milliseconds - if it wasn’t for the jolly tune that suddenly fills the air. / for minutes or years or millenia or maybe even eons / After a brief, indescribably long nap / But the incomprehensible amount of time seems somehow shorter this time.

- 2 in one of fucking with the concept of time and hinting at an unreliable narrator, hell yea. its about the weird atmosphere, baybeeeee

“Does one day of trying the hardest we could outweigh years of not trying at all?” Emma wonders aloud. Paul squeezes her hand.

“I damn hope so.”

He doesn’t ask if she believes in Hell.

- even without context i like this line but in context it really helped set the sombre tone so i could do a full 180 at the end of the chapter

Emma wonders whether they’ve been sent to musical hell for failing to stop the musical apocalypse

- love the implication that there is a hell dedicated to annoying people via musical theatre

“You said- you told her you’d never be in a musical?”

“Yes.”

“And then you died performing a musical number?”

“I- yeah, I did.”

“Brilliant! Now, that is stupid!”

- probably my best characterisation of death, sounds like something that would be said in a stupid deaths bit, i can hear it in his voice

teachers pet

“It’s only blatant if people know about it. So in actual fact this is secret favouritism.”

- hidgens gives absolutely 0 shits about the ethics of the situation good for him

“And if that is kidnapping, well, consider yourself kidnapped.”

- once again ethics simply do not matter

“Oh, where is your sense of adventure? Are you not curious about the results of washing baked beans?”

- this line hants me when im trying to make stew or just have some fucking beans on toast because I am curious about the results of washing baked beans

“Well, if it isn’t, and we both die, then I’ll be quite disappointed. We did spend all evening on this, after all.”

- priorities

finishing what we started, actually originally a scrapped ending idea for igtlt that i liked too much to abandon entirely

“How many bullets?” He eventually asks.

“Enough.”

- they just know what theyve got to do

Only thing left to say is a big ol’ fuck you to… God, everyone else in the fucking world. Oh, and God. Fuck you God, you prick.

- gotta love them tto refs

wildfire, almost 20,000 words of angst that im going to read through because fuck it why not

She doesn't understand the order, at least not yet; a dog doesn't understand the first time she's called to heel. But that can change. Though, from the bared teeth of this dog, the trader guesses it may take a while.

- this is actually something i really like doing in narration, calling a character something in dialogue or comparison and then directly calling them it in the narration

He understands; she doesn't want to show weakness to someone who could exploit her, doesn't want to show gratitude to someone she hates. But the tribeswoman is tired and scared and hurt, and it's obvious. She's broken, at least for today.

The loneliness, however, refuses to wane. It settles in her chest like a physical need, a craving for closeness.

- got inspiration for this description by thinking about hugging my partner while i was stuck in lockdown

"You can say that again," the older woman mutters, shaking her head. "God-fuckin'-damnit, Lauren, why d'you never think about the implications?"

Jemilla turns to her with a questioning look. "Who's Lauren?"

"She-" Molag begins to explain, then pauses. She thinks for a moment, then shakes her head. "I don't even know."

- crossover jokes hell yea

He’s tolerable, she’s decided, at least relatively so, but not trustworthy. If she could truly trust him then he wouldn’t be involved in all this. If she could trust him, she wouldn’t know him.

The thinly-veiled threat in his grin

She stares up at the man, shaking, whimpering, pleading. Wordlessly begging for him to stop.

- gotta love reaching the breaking point

She probably looks insane, bruised and bloody and laughing quietly to herself in a cage. She doesn’t care. They can think she’s insane, just as long as they don’t think they broke her.

laughing as they rediscover half-forgotten days spent as children let loose in a world that seemed so huge and yet so small at the same time

“You know, kids like Zazzalil - scrawny little things born as Autumn died - they’re not supposed to see Spring.”

- i will see any character without a detailed fleshed-out backstory and say ‘is anyone going to make headcannons about that’ and then not wait for an answer

Maybe the pain will shock her out of her head.

im going to live twice

It feels more like a bag of broken crockery than a human.

- this was the only time ive ever had to describe something really gory and decided to make it as uncomfy as possible

she notices with a concerning level of non-concern

Paul Matthews is gone, boy. And if I catch you using a dead man’s name again, well.

- its about the ✨forced disconnect✨

It stares at him, and for a moment he sees the young man that Benny used to be, silently pleading for the agent to tell him he'll be okay.

"In my defence, that was the Colonel's idea.” The man raises his hands in surrender. “I wanted to call you Lauren. I was outvoted.”

- i will take literally any chance to make a 4th wall joke and that is a threat

“I’ll see what can be done,” he assures it, knowing full well that nothing will be.

- xander doesnt flat out abuse emma in the way mcnamara and shaffer do but hes still cruel in subtler ways

“No chance of being hurt?”

Xander nods. “No chance of you being hurt.”

-  ✨foreshadowing ✨

If only he was free, free to just get up and go find Blue and tell her - actually tell her, out loud, with words - that she’s going to be okay. If only he could say that and have it be the truth.

She holds onto that piano. Right now, as she kneels crying into the tabletop, it's all she has.

- ‘sir thats my emotional support near-complete stranger’

smoke and feathers

Irony can be a cruel, twisted bitch.

- probably the best opener ive written

There’s a sort of pathetic irony in the fact that she slipped on a stone while wading across a shallow stream and broke her neck.

The stars move across the sky, and she still doesn’t know why.

- sounds poetic and all while also being a fuck you to the chorn twist because i hate it

It seems like every time she looks away the moon goes from waxing to waning and back again, time marching onwards in one unending night, swallowing one unending forest.

Even with her limited view of the person’s face, Zazzalil can see the softness in their expression. She’s hit with a pang of longing for Jemilla.

They share those tender looks that make Zazzalil long for home.

The kind of silence only shared between people who can appreciate the simplicity of each other’s presence

aaand thats pretty much all of em. i know when you said ‘some’ you probably meant less than this but i will give a consice answer to a question when pigs fly. i was going to do the double e au too but its past 1 am now and im going to bed. thanks for this ask because whether intentionally or not you just made me read 48,860 words of fic and thats a damn good distraction when things are getting a bit shitty :)

[bellismaperry]

Idiot { Loki Fanfiction }

This my first Fanfic that I post here on tumblr. I literally just wrote this so theres a lot of grammer mistakes. I’ll promise I’ll get better haha. Hope you like it. It has a main Character but if you want like y/n you can do it. its how ever you want to read it! as long the message of the story is there I don’t care!. Please if you do like tell me to continue!! cause I will. I don’t know when I’ll post because I work and study. but I promise I will post. If want to be tagged pls dm. and will be tagged until its closed!. Hope you guys like this story I have had this idea for so long! hope you really like it like it like I do and lets see what the future holds! I present to you Idiot ( ps the cover is on its way ;) )

Warnings: None

Tara Jones

Loki Odinson

——————————————————————-🦋

Everybody was wearing black attire, with sad expressions. Losing a member of a team is one the hardest things ever. Its like losing a family member. After pushing away Tony’s reacter in the lake, I sat at the wooden porch with my legs in the lake.

God I am such an idiot . How could be so dumb?. I look around the people around me. There were new faces along with old ones. Tony had a lot of people who cared for him.

Strange looks at me looking around and walks over where I am sitting. “ I know its a funural and being happy is not an option, but why in particular you look like you killed some one”

I look up to him and shake my head. “ I messed up Stephen, big time and now its ony hitting me” I say as I move my feet around the water.

he takes a breath “ we all do that all the time Tara”

I shake my head and take my feet off the water and put them on the wooden porch. “ no but i seriously messed up. Theres a solution but it only make it hundred times more worst then it already is. And the worst part is I’m completely alone with it and just still a kid”

Strange Lowers down to my level as tears starts to fall off my face. “ You’re not alone, you have me and the rest of all the people here”

I wipe my tears with the sleeve of my shirt. and look down at my hands. “ Nobody can help because,

I’m pregnant with Loki’s baby” ..

Chapter one

My mother used to tell me that everything was for a reason and that god has set up for me for a good reason in my life. But what my mother didn’t tell me was that getting knocked up by a god at the age of 23 was the plan that a “god” had for me.

This was a whole new game for me and whats left of the avengers team but for overall for me mostly. Since I’m the one pushing the damn thing out of me in 9 months or so.

When I told Stephen that I was pregnant with Loki’s baby hell broke loose. Well let me rephrase that.

Fury wanted me to be locked up because I was connected with a war criminal. Carol wanted to blast me off for being so stupid. Bruce was scratching his head like fifty times at once because how in the hell I was going to give birth to a semi-god. Thor was the only one happy because he had at least some family left couldn’t wait to be a uncle and wanted me to give birth in New Asgard but soon that idea went away when he left with the guardians. And well lastly Stephen was in a screaming match with me for over an hour of how stupid moron idiotic person I am , of letting myself getting pregnant of a super galactic international war criminal. And honestly I couldn’t agree more with everything that happened.

It is stupid of me getting prego of a criminal, and even more when he’s like dead dead and probs never coming back. But at the same time who could blame? I was horny he was too, we both good looking people, we took the chance and honestly to what ever god I don’t regret what happened in that ship, one of the best nights of my life...

Sakarian Refugees Ship..

“Did that just-“ I get cut of by loki

“ Happen?, yes” he says as he sits up the against the bed head board.

I look up at him and smile. “ This was the most Idiot thing I ever done ” I say as I take a breath.

“really?” he asks as he pushes his hair away from his face.

I nod “ yea, but I don’t regret one bit of it” I say with a small smile.

Loki smiles at me and leans down to my face “ good because I don’t either” he leans closer and gives me a kiss. But is soon comes to an end as Thor voice enters the room.

“Loki! We need help theres a ship coming towards us and its not stopping after numerous calls of peace!”

Loki pulls away and takes a deep breath “ well I guess that the end of that” I grab one side of of his face and pass my fingers over his smooth skin. “ don’t worry theres going to be more” I say as I lean over to him for another kiss but I am stopped as the ship moves unexpectedly as like something shooting us.

I look at Loki worried and gives me the same look. “we need to get dressed now!” he says and I nod with him and as we both get off the bed and start getting dressed as fast we could...

Present

Now I’m sitting in a cold white bed in the ginecoligist office waiting to get my first ultra sound done. My case was the worlds most confusing ones. My baby was turn into dust inside of me after the bleep happend or so like Bruce likes to say, you had a dust baby for five years and when the snap was reversed your baby re appeared again. Every doctor in the country wanted to be my doctor and do it for free which man is every pregnant woman dream!. One of this things are so expensive its more expensive then a damn house.

But thanks to Pepper Recommendation I am here with her ginecologist who helped her tru her pregnancy. Which means i’m in very good hands.

“ok, i’m sorry for the wait Ms?” The Doctor aks as she sits in the chair and puts gloves on.

“Jones , Tara Jones” I say as I lift my shirt up and lean down in the bed.

“Ok Tara, My name Is Leslie Williams were going just going to check how the little baby is doing and let you on the basic stuff ok?” she says as she takes container with something jelly inside of it.

I smile and nod.

“ok perfect ,Lets see whats happening inside. I’m going to put this jelly in your stomach its going to feel cold but it will go in a few minutes” she says as she opens up the tube and pours our the cold jelly in my stomach. and starst moving the device around my stomach.

“ Is the Father coming later or”

I Swallow a bit and bite my lip “ no its just me”

“ Oh well, you’re going to be a great mother alone or not don’t let those bad anxieties take over ok. Everything is going to be ok. And in your particular case were going to do everything we can to make this process as painless and smooth as we can”. she says with a warm smile.

i give her a toothless smile. Cmo’n! I am giving birth to a semi-god. I can hear my screaming already. I had a dust baby. A DUST BABY that has to have complications somehow. I am human after all. and to make it all worst the one person who could tell me how this could go was strangled to death so thats great and awsome to start with.

“I mean its not going to be smooth it all. I am giving birth to a god. I am a simple human, the only special thing about me is my magic and this baby. Who’s Father is never going to be with me because a big purple alien with a purple ballsack of a face thought it was a good idea to get rid half of the population and stangle him to death until his eyes was crying blood and then go live in a farm like some red neck in tennessee. No its not going to be fine or smooth or happy or wonderful. So don’t be say things that won’t ever happen please.

The Doctor stares at me in shock. and proceeds to look for the baby. “ i’m sorry to hear that Ms Jones I had no idea.” she says as she keeps looking at the screen.

I take a deep breath pass my hands all over my face “ its ok, I’m used to it by now”

She nods. and when I was about to tell her that I was sorry of how I reacted she stared pointing to the screen and say “ there, theres it is. You’re baby. “

I look closer to the screen and see a tiny circle. A tiny innocent circle that was growing inisde of me. it looked like the size of a 5 peas together.

“you’re Four weeks in the pregnancy, the exams all look great, nothing looks like is altered by the bleep. It looks like you just got pregnant four weeks ago not five years ago. Which its is a medical miracle discovery. “ she says taking off her gloves.

I nod at her while still looking at the screen, I lean over and pass my fingers thru the screen. Thats my baby there. My circle god dust baby.

the Doctor looks at me and crosses her arms against her chest. “ do you want a picture of the ultra sound?”

I nod not looking way from the monitor “ yea”

the Doctor smiles and leaves the room.

I still stare at the monitor. Thats my and Loki’s baby. Who knew that a one-night stand with a god would have lead to this. It was stupid of me not using protection but what did i know? for all I thought humans couldn’t get pregnant by gods.

But I do know that is this is going to be a very bumpy ride... With my dust baby.

🦋—————————————————-

Thank you for reading the first chapter of Idiot hope you guys liked it!! remember to leave a comment, like and reblog pls! also if want to be tagged for the next chapter dm! bye love you guys! 🦋🦋

[ssweeneys]

i’m having a REALLY bad day

or really past couple of weeks where work is concerned and i just wanna vent bc you know sometimes people out there in the working world understand ya know???

its long, beware. idek if i’ll keep this up its more so for me to just let it out.

so like i’m an office admin for a company (we’ll leave it nameless for protection purposes) and like i supervise receptionists for my office so i’m kinda an office manager but not technically? if that makes sense.

anyway. people these days just don’t want to fucking work like EVER and like to start jobs and then up and vanish to collect that unemployment which to me is really just dumb since there are rules to it in every state and nine times out of ten you’re making like 60% of what your normal paycheck would be and thats surely not enough to live on, so like ??? i don’t get it.

there’s been a constant rotation of receptionists come and go over the last couple of months and two girls who work for me have stepped in on numerous occasions. one lady is in her 60s and doesn’t know anything about computers and is kind of dense?? to say the least. nothing against old ladies. i actually find a majority of them cute or hilarious bc they say what they think and dont give a f*ck who it offends and sometimes that blunt honesty is refreshing and you just need it in a world where people bullshit you 24/7 to further themselves for selfish gain and yaddy yada

anyways.. over recent weeks she’s become more and more intolerable to deal with. i ask her to do things and she gives me attitude and its like the simplest of things.. like email this person, make sure you let this person know they got a package, etc, etc. she can’t do even the most basic of tasks without screwing up. her attitude is just atrocious.

and due to people coming and going i’ve had to alter our schedule a lot. recently, one girl requested off so i adjusted the older lady’s hours (lets call her--carla) mind you carla only works 1 day a week and i’ve been super generous in giving her the entire week of christmas off so -- yeah.

anyways the girl who requested off (we’ll call her nicole) told me she didnt need those days off anymore and so i fixed the schedule one more time to her original days/hours.

now, i print off the schedule every time a change is made and whoever is at the reception desk i tell them to let the other girls know and post it right by the computer they sit at every day so theres no excuse for anyone to say i didnt make them aware. well carla is not the brightest bulb as we already established and she doesnt pay attention so we pretty much have to coddle her apparently and make sure she understands (although its pointless bc she doesnt no matter how hard you try to explain something to her) ANYWAYS she comes in on nicoles day when she wasnt supposed to anymore bc the schedule was fixed, posted, etc. and she gets mad when i ask her why shes there. and yes, i understand that the rotation has fucked us all over and up in so many ways. she is not the only victim here. this has been stressing me out left and right and to no end for MONTHSSSSS. so like i get it? i’m sympathetic to that. i understand the confusion and frustration, i’m right there with them.

HOWEVER, because she’s annoyed/mad/whatever she gives me attitude all day yesterday and is flagrantly disrespectful. i’m her supervisor, regardless is someone upsets you, act professional.

but she doesn’t. we know that. or at least I DO. anyhow.. she’s mad. she’s pissed off right? she’s got an attitude. she sees the new schedule, she brings it to me in my office and asks if its the correct one for tomorrow WHICH SHE IS ON!!! let me make that clear. she was on. she asks if its correct, i’m in the middle of composing an email so i take a moment to respond ‘yes’ she huffs, storms off and goes “you know what? nevermind” i’m like.... okay?? i brush it off. i’ve been brushing off her poor attitude all damn day and i dont say A THING. BC I GET IT. I UNDERSTAND. IM SYMPATHETIC TO THAT. we all have bad days. we all get a little frustrated sometimes. we’re human, yeah?

yeah. right. ok.

so then like... carla is working the morning shift for nicole. both carla and nicole showed up. carla pitched a fit bc she came in and was already there and didnt want to go home so nicole was so sweet about it and said thats okay, she can work i understand. bc even though nicole is like half her age, she’s MATURE.

at this point i dont even understand why carla is so upset? she got to stay. she got the hours. she’ll be making the money. all is good right? WRONG.

when the next girl comes in for the afternoon shift, i over hear carla telling her about the mishap that happened that morning (yesterday) and my office is literally maybe 6-7 feet from the front desk so i can hear EVERYTHING that goes on. i mean this is my job. i’m pretty much in charge of making sure the office is running, our employees are happy, etc.

so yeah i over hear carla telling this girl that and i quote “yeah nicole came in this morning and the schedule was switched around and i stayed because i was already here. (then something unintelligible I cant make out bc her voice lowers) you know, it really pisses me off that this keeps happening.”

SHE SAID THIS. TO A NEW GIRL. MAKING ME, NICOLE, EVERYONE LOOK BAD EVEN THOUGH SHE GOT WHAT SHE WANTED, NICOLE APOLOGIZED, I APOLOGIZED FOR THE MISHAP, IVE DONE EVERYTHING FOR THIS LADY TO PACIFY HER OR WORK WITH HER OR COMPENSATE HER.

so its so infuriating, disrespectful and really downright disgusting for her to trash me, my name, etc to someone. but you know what? I DONT SAY ANYTHING. I dont cause a scene. I go about my business and let it roll off my shoulders bc at this point I know if I say anything its just going to turn ugly and I’m in a professional setting. Sometimes its better to bite your tongue, hold your head up high and move the fuck on about your business.

NOW... oh now, we’re on today. carla is scheduled to work. she came into my office, confirmed it, she was FULLY AWARE OF THIS.

so nicole calls her 5 mins before shes scheduled to clock in and is politely like hey you on your way? and carla is like oh no i don’t work today.

BITCH! THE FUcK YOU MEAN????? WE CONFIRMED THIS LITERALLY!!!!!!!!

omg i cannot at this point i really cannot

but lets proceed... so carla. she’s like yeah i dont come in, tells nicole to check with me. nicole comes to me, i smh and just sigh and am like ok i’m sorry can you please call her back and tell her shes supposed to be here and if theres any issues, transfer the call to me. so nicole calls her, they’re talking, carla is being a cunt (sorry at this point you are) and so i talk to her and shes like you know, this is so frustrating i came in there i asked you if i was supposed to work and you said no (the other girl she trash talked to idk who to name her) and IM LIKE SITTING THERE GOING ????? WHEN????? TO MYSELF BC WE JUST HAD THIS CONVERSATION

MY PATIENCE IS SO THIN, ITS NON EXISTENT AT THIS POINT IM OVER IT

IM TIRED

IM SO FUCKING TIRED AND SICK OF HAVING TO PICK UP THE SLACK AND DO EVERYTHING MY FUCKING SELF BC NO ONE CAN COME TO WORK, DO THEIR JOB AND GO HOME.

can i just make a point too that we make $12 an hour here. sometimes we are LITERALLY SO BORED we have nothing to do. we can read books or watch netflix if no one is around or i even have time to rp at times. so like THIS IS THE EASIEST JOB IN THE WORLD A FUCKING MONKEY could do it.

all you do is answer phones and transfer calls or send an email

its LITERALLY. THAT. FUCKING. SIMPLE????

so like i just dont get it

but back to the point... carla is arguing with me, basically saying my communication sucks, i’m unprofessional (which is laughable but ok) etc...

and i just cant hold it in anymore?? and i’m like well carla, i’m sorry you feel that way and i understand where you’re coming from but i don’t appreciate that you were disrespectful yesterday, you told (new girl) that you were pissed off about what happened and proceeded to talk about me in a really unsatisfactory way.

and she WANTED TO TRY AND SAY THAT THIS WAS A DEFAMATION TO HER CHARACTER. WHEN SHE FUCKING SAID IT!!!!!!!!!!! i mean you can’t but if you were to ask anyone i know i have freakishly good hearing and it gets on my family’s nerves all the time bc i need quiet when writing and i have to beg them to turn their tvs down low just so i can concentrate.

I FUcKIng HEARD THESE EXACT WORDS COME OUT OF HER MOUTH!!!! and she wants to sit here and say that i’m defaming her character.

NO BITCH. Im repeating what I fucking heard you say!!!

why would i make that up? why??? how does that benefit me in any way??? what does that do for me???? NOTHING! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!! i’m not benefitting from anything here.

in addition when talking to her on the phone i bring up the fact that she brought the schedule to me (the correct one which SHE IS ON) and asked me to verify if it was correct. but then proceeds to say in the same breath (contradicting herself) that she’s going off the old one????? like okay????? but you’re wrong?? SHE EVEN SAYS ITS AN OVERSIGHT ON HER CHARACTER, SHE ALREADY MADE PLANS YADDY YADA, SHE CANT COME IN TODAY

moral of the story is... she’s dumb. she’s a fucking cunt. and i hate people who try to spin things and victim blame and tell you you’re defaming their character when you call them out on something real they actually said because they’re scared little pussies and can’t just admit its what they fucking said.

yo i’d have a lot more respect for you if you just admit it. i’m not even mad??? i dont give a fuck what you think or feel about me. when i leave here every day i dont come home and cry about work or how people feel about me there.

work me is different from real me. I. DO. NOT. FUCKING. CARE. work people do not know me on a real level only a professional one. i am here to do a job, to make money, to pay bills, to LIVE. i am not here to fret over the opinions of people who do not follow me home, who do not know the real me. WHO. DO. NOT. FUCKING. MATTER.

POINT FUCKING BLANK.

THANK YOU AND GOODBYE

like seriously?? GOD FUCK! i’m so angry.

if you read all of this, like thanks for letting me vent to a total stranger lmao you’re a real one, may you be blessed today and always.

onto that note... i gotta get back to work. (lmfao fucking irony at its finest)

[pilferingapples]

I don’t know if you’ve answered this but do you know what the political affiliation the Amis had in the original book and how would translate to a modern AU? Thank you!

Hi!:D  The first one’s an easy answer, anyway– they’re republicans (as in they want a republic, nothing to do with the modern American party) and they’re socialists; republican socialist (socialist republicans?) .  They’re very left-wing, in a sense very near the original one: they are specifically drawing on the tradition of the original French Republic, and aligned with the more radical representatives who sat on the left side of the National/Legislative assembly. They’re also extremely  radical in their republican socialism, given that they are trying to overthrow the government by force!

A brief list of their canon major political issues, which is STILL going under the cut for length, might include:

-a representative government, elected by all citizens , via universal suffrage - mandatory free primary education, free secondary education (free access to education for all, at every level, was one of Hugo’s big causes)

- ending childhood and generational poverty

-support for the elderly, children, and those otherwise unable to work

- access to property for all (this is unusually era-specific but it was a Thing with Hugo–he wanted every man to be able to be a property owner and thought that would Fix Things in various ways, some of which don’t apply now)

-universal access to employment/work 

-general equality of opportunity and equality under the law 

-the standard Human Rights package issues: freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, freedom of religion, right to trial, etc

-what were seen as women’s issues of the day (note that I’m not calling them feminist by modern standards in canon, but at least two of them, Prouvaire and Combeferre,  have specific interests with at-the-time “women’s issues” )

-internationalism/international justice 

-societal support for scientific research and the arts  

and …a  lot more, really! But those are the big ones (and the first point on the list was seen as the gateway requirement for all the others! hence the barricade).

For a modern AU, many of these obviously translate just fine as-is; others are obviously easy to update. If there’s something specific you’re wondering about, message me off anon and I might be able to give more context to help you find a Modern Equivalent?

In general, though, I think there’s a couple main points for translating them into AUs, whether modern or another historical era or fantasy, etc: 

One is that the Amis are *supposed* to be extremely progressive and social-justice minded; Hugo, writing from 30 years in the future, did his best to give them the radical ideas of their era that had aged the best (at least in his eyes) and even some that hadn’t yet had a chance to really develop but that he personally believed in deeply (universal mandatory childhood education!) .  Yes, there were even more radical thinkers and activists in the 1830s, buuuuut I think Hugo did a pretty good job in not making them , say, overt Evadanistes or extremely devout Fourierists (and he does show that at least some of them are engaged in the dialogue around those more radical movements, even so!). 

Where they seem retrogressive or outdated to us, it’s because we’re looking at them from 180+ years on. Amis in another setting aren’t going to have the same limits and foibles in their political and personal philosophies; they’ll have the limits and foibles of very progressive social justice minded people of their new setting. 

The other thing is that they are, to put it mildly, very Direct Action sorts. The way they manifest that varies between them, but they aren’t just meetings-and-fundraisers sorts, they’re out there walking the talk, building networks, learning directly from other people what’s needed and what’s going on, and putting themselves directly in the (potentially literal) line of fire, potential consequences-wise. If they’re just sitting around talking a lot of trash and singing the AU equivalent of La Marseillaise , that’s a Problem, characterization -wise (and why yes I am  glaring at a certain French cartoon right now:P). The average person who shares some of their ideas is not going to be as full-tilt Committed, and should be coming away from initial encounters going “woah, y’all might wanna dial it back maybe??” not “You Know Nothing of Real Activism” ( glaring hard  at that cartoon now). 

… And this has turned into a bit of a screed, but, well, you did ask, so I hope this screed  is at least helpful! XD Let me know if you need me to clarify anything!

[stokan]

Top 20 Things of 2018

1.) Beychella How do you make a long awaited surprise album between two of the biggest names in music that is also one of the year’s best feel like complete afterthought? Set the bar as high as Beyonce’s Coachella appearance.

First awards show performances, then music videos, now music festival gigs: is there anything that Beyonce CAN’T turn into high art?

2.) Explained by Vox The most exciting development in the world of television in 2018 was radically breaking the rules on episodes length. We saw 30 minute dramas, and hour long comedies. We got shows like Maniac where episodes were as long as 49 minutes and as short as 27 minutes. Now television creators can tell exactly the stories they want to tell in however much time they want to tell them in. And perhaps nowhere were these loosened restrictions taken better advantage than Explained, Vox’s documentary series for Netflix. Many topics cant sustain a full length documentary, but, say, 14 minutes explaining cryptocurrency to me? Sure! 17 minutes on designer DNA? Sounds great! 20 minutes on the origins of K-Pop? How do you say “yes please” in Korean? Every episode has a different narrator, a different look, a different feel, and varies wildly in subject matter. Yet they are all exactly the length they need to be. The only thing left I really need explained to me is why no one thought to make this series before.

3.) Serial Season 3 If Explained was a great example of the latest evolution in television, then the new season of Serial is at the front line of the evolution of our newest artistic medium: podcasts. Serial’s third season was nothing like its second, which was in turn nothing like its first. It’s a series still figuring out what it CAN be, while now defining forever what it NEEDS to be. Serial this year explained a deeply important topic in a way that wouldn’t have been possible through any other medium. They always say if you’re a writer you have to ask yourself what form of writing your idea needs to be. Don’t write a play that’s really a TV show, or a movie that should be a book. And now we can add to that don’t make a TV series that’s really a podcast. As Homecoming proved this year, the two mediums are very different and better equipped to tell different stories. And after hearing Serial Season Three I can’t imagine there will ever be a better way to explore the current American criminal justice system. It was 2018’s version of Upton Sinclair’s The Jungle. It may not change national food safety standards, but it hopefully will do something perhaps even more important: it will make us never again take lightly the election of local judges and sheriffs. It was a podcast for the heart, the head, and the time capsule.

4.) Black Mirror - “Hang the DJ” I know this technically came out December 29th 2017 but I’m counting it here because nothing was more 2018 than this. The sadness, the isolation, the uncertainty, the living in a world you don’t understand the rules of anymore, the unfairness of modern life, but the ultimate perseverance of hope and love: it’s all there in the best episode of Black Mirror’s third season. It made me cry out of sadness and happiness in equal measure. Could anything be more 2018 than that?

5.) Kesha at the Grammys Ok so maybe one thing was more 2018.

The Grammys, an organization led by Neil Portnow, a man who said this year that “women need to step up”, and an organization that didn’t offer its one female Album of the Year nominee a solo performance spot, also offered us 2018’s most powerful show of female solidarity and one of the most moving moments of the Me Too era. It all amounted to the perfect encapsulation of this year. Kesha scream crying and then collapsing into a sea of strong supportive women WAS 2018.

6.) Eighth Grade My favorite movie of the year was also the year’s best horror movie. It was so real, and visceral, and intense, and frightening that at times I literally had to remind myself to breathe. I watched at least half the movie through my fingers and on the edge of my seat. Proving what everyone who has lived through it already knows: there’s nothing in the world more terrifying than being in junior high.

7.) Big Mouth Speaking of junior high, the other side of the pain and trauma of growing up is humor, so why it took this long for someone to make a comedy series explicitly about puberty is beyond me. I guess, of course, making a show like this work is a fine needle to thread. It wouldn’t work without being animated and being on a streaming service that lets them go as far as they did. It wouldn’t work without writing that is both laugh out loud funny and deeply compassionate and human in equal measure. And it wouldn’t work without one of the best voice casts on TV, including a true tour de force from Maya Rudolph. But work does it ever. In a just world junior high health class homework would be simply watching this show.

8.) Emma Gonzalez speech Here’s how long 2018 was: this was from 2018.

Finishing off my personal 2018 Growing Up Trifecta is the most powerful 12 minutes of the year. That high school students could be more inspiring, articulate, and better leaders than the President of the United States is sadly, at this point, a given. But that they are now more effective and efficient than him at starting genuine political movements still feels revolutionary. The kids are our future, and our future has never looked brighter.

9.) Childish Gambino - “This is America” video 100 years from now if theres only one cultural artifact that still exists and is still remembered from 2018 this will be it. A “you know where you were the first time you saw it” level cultural event. No song will ever be more closely associated with its music video, and no music video will ever be more of an avatar for an entire cultural moment than this. THIS is, of course, a truly shocking and horrifying (in a good way) music video from the former fifth lead of the TV show Community. A profound and brilliant piece of art underscored by a fun-sounding dance song. The year’s most complex and important social-political message delivered in 4 minutes via YouTube. This is America indeed.

10.) Drake - “God’s Plan” video While Donald Glover may have perfected the music video as art form, it goes without saying that long ago Drake mastered the music video as promotional tool. And in that sense the music video for “God’s Plan” seems like minor failure. It seemed to sort of come and go from the culture, especially in light of the success of the In My Feelings Challenge. But for me, there was nothing more heartwarming and human this year than watching Drake give away almost a million dollars to strangers. It was an idea so simple it’s shocking no one had ever done it before. And so affecting I was shocked it didn’t seem to penetrate the public consciousness more. There’s so much going on at all times now it’s hard for anything to truly break through all the noise, but this really deserved to. It’s impossible to watch this without smiling, and is there anything 2018 needed more than that?

11.) Nanette The dumbest debate this year was whether or not Nanette was stand up. Form and genre aren’t delineators still worth discussing in 2018. It’s now only about the message and the messenger, everything else is just details. An important fresh voice, the most timely, and sadly, timeless message imaginable, delivered in a way that reached and deeply affected seemingly every person you knew? What is there to debate? Nanette may or may not be stand up comedy, but it’s definitely RISE UP comedy. And in the end, that’s all that matters.

12.) Amber Says What Please click on the link above. The final two minutes are by far the best comedy of 2018. It still makes me laugh so hard that it causes me physical pain. You’ve been warned.

13.) A Star is Born trailers A Star is Born is maybe a perfect film. The performances, the songs, the direction, the fact that there’s literally no human being on earth who could have played her part and made the movie work like it did other than Lady Gaga. It was all perfect. But there was actually something better than watching A Star is Born: anticipating watching a A Star is Born. Before the first A Star is Born trailer came out I thought the whole project sounded dumb and unnecessary. After I finished watching the first trailer I knew I was going to see A Star is Born opening night. True story: I was at a movie where the same A Star is Born trailer got played three times in a row for some reason. And it was riveting every time. There was no grumbling at all in the audience, and I for one was sad when it didn’t replay a fourth time. So as much as I loved A Star is Born what I would really love is be able to still want to see A Star is Born for the first time.

14.) Ariana Grande - “thank u, next” It’s genuinely impressive that a song released in November could be the song I listened to by far the most this year. Somehow it took less than two months for this song to feel completely ubiquitous. Hell, even the PHRASE “thank u, next” is omnipresent now. Forget Song of the Summer, this was maybe our first Song of the Winter. Which is perfect because has a hit pop song ever sounded more winter? It’s cold, but it keeps you warm. It’s the sadness of the holidays with the life reaffirming joy of the holiday season. It’s a sweater for you to wear on the dance floor. And it’s clearly exactly the song so many of us needed. No matter how many times I’ve heard it (and as I said, I’ve listened to it, uh, A LOT) its existence feels like a holiday miracle. Having a new and fresh take on the breakup song in the year 2018? That shit IS amazing.

15.) The proposal at the Emmys This is literally the only thing anyone remembers about this year’s Emmys. It was amazing, and special, and made anyone who watched it believe in true love. But for me it still cant touch the most heart-melting awards show moment of all time: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCJrku4fSxk

(Was this whole entry just an excuse to link to one of my absolute favorite YouTube clips? Perhaps.)

16.) Succession When I saw the promos for Succession I literally made the sound UGH out loud. The last thing the world needs is another show about rich white people behaving badly, I thought. How could there possibly be anything original left to say on that topic? Who on earth is still greenlighting shows like this in The Year of our Lord 2018?

People much smarter than I am clearly, that’s who.

Because from writing, acting, production design, direction - whatever element you want to focus on - this was the best and most exciting new show of 2018 by a wide margin. People have been saying for years that TV is the new movies; this show made movies look like the old TV. It was the most vibrant and perfectly crafted big budget feature film of 2018, stretched out over 8 episodes on HBO. Did it have anything new and important to say about the world? Probably not. And turns out, I couldn’t have cared less. The phrase compulsively watchable might have been invented just to describe the world these actors and writers created. I would watch the team involved with this show dry paint. 

17.) Angels in America on Broadway Angels in America is the best play of the past 30 years and its not even close. So the fact that it would get a production that’s this good is just unfair for everyone else on this planet who makes theater. It was so good it made all other plays I’ve seen since seem small and cheap and unimportant. It was such a towering achievement that it has made the entire rest of theater as an art form seem insignificant by comparison. When you hear old people talk about seeing Brando in Streetcar or watching the original production of Death of Salesman I now can relate to what they are talking about. I’ll be thinking about Andrew Garfield’s final monologue for the rest of my life. It was unfair that we the audience had to all leave the theater when the lights finally came up and that we couldn’t all just live in that feeling forever. The eight hours I spent watching this play are what art is all about.

18.) Jesse Plemons in Game Night If dying is easy, and comedy is hard, then they should cancel the Oscars and give Jesse Plemmons Best Supporting Actor right now for his work in Game Night. And ok, maybe it wasn’t the BEST performance of 2018, but it was DEFINITELY the best performance relative to what it needed to be. It should have been a dumb throwaway part in a big-budget mainstream ensemble comedy. But Jesse Plemmons crafted a performance so strange and singular and memorable that it elevated the entire movie into something way better than I’m sure even its creators expected. I legitimately don’t know how everyone didn’t break in every one of his scenes. It’s a master class in the comedic power of silence. It should be studied in acting classes everywhere. And 20 years from now when Game Night is considered a comedy classic, Jesse Plemmons will be the main reason why. You heard it here first.

19.) The 1975 - A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships Saxophones? Electric guitar solos? Backing choirs? A concept album about being uncomfortable with the internet? Dumb pretentious song titles? This album couldn’t be any more in my wheelhouse if I made it myself. Its best song is basically a modern reimagining of “We Didn’t Start the Fire” for God’s sake!

For me this wasn’t just an album, it was an experience. It was big music to get lost inside of. And I did. At age 36 it’s nice to know that sometimes I can still feel 16. And it’s fitting that a band named The 1975 would be the ones to make music that’s so transporting.

20.) Emma Stone Ok so as someone who once argued in this very space that Emma Stone deserved an Oscar nomination for Easy A, it’s clear I’m pretty deep in the tank for Emma Stone. But even an Emma Stone hater would have to admit than this was a banner year for Emma Stone. Signing up for the insane acting challenge that was Maniac and completely acing it while totally exposing two-time Oscar nominee Jonah Hill in the process? Going toe to toe with Olivia Colman in the battle of the best acting performances of the year in The Favourite? Coming across as more charming than Jennifer freaking Lawrence ?!?

2018 was Emma Stone’s year, we were all just living in it.

[terramythos]

My liveblog/commentary on October Daye #11 "The Brightest Fell" or "Friendship ended with Sylvester Torquill. Now SIMON Torquill is my best friend"

God if you told me that's a sentence I'd write when I read book 1 I'd call you fucking insane. We had this whole Cain and Abel thing going and Seanan McGuire had to go be a GOOD WRITER and make them COMPLEX CHARACTERS and shit.

Also featuring a "Resurrect Your Gays" novella at the end so.. that's nice

-Wow, this opens with a story so far section and everything 👀

-who would be like "gee the October daye series sounds interesting. Let's start with book 11"

-omfg The Luidaeg singing Poor Unfortunate Souls. Fucking hell yes.

*stares at my vampire crack theory* *stares at that line* *stares at the camera*

-(To be fair, it does parallel when Simon showed up in book 8, which is probably the actual intent, but uhhh)

-then AGAIN, half the foreshadowing lines in this series had double meanings in context

-Amandine calling Simon "your father" oh oof.

-oh my god Amandine is AWFUL. Jesus christ. Insults everyone in the room then kidnaps 2 people and just strolls out. This puts Tybalt, one of the more OP allies, out of commission for like the whole book lol

-Definitely Impossible Quest: find this character that disappeared over 100 years ago who Simon spent the last century committing misc atrocities to find

-This does lead me to wonder what motivated Amandine to show up suddenly and force October to find August. Is she just unstable/crazy as has been implied, or is it something more?

GOD shes awful!

-So oh boy we are actually waking up Simon! I'm glad we are getting more development for him cause holy crap he's an interesting gray morality character.

-Sylvester using the same binding spell Evening used on October in book 1, but this time to keep Simon from hurting October, sure draws some.. uh.. interesting parallels.

👀

-Amandine shows up again and is just fucking AWFUL. I'm trying to figure out if she has any real sympathetic traits. This is the first book she really shows up as a character out of flashbacks and the trippy shit in book 4.

- "Oh yeah Toby the reason I abused you and twisted your blood human as a kid was I wanted to mourn the daughter who disappeared and then let you die asap" like. Yikes

-Simon, established as an Arch Villain just being an awkward dad (at least toward October) is interesting. I'm kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop.

-oh hey saving the pixies in book 5 actually set up a Thing in this one. Huh.

-Surprise that random pixie you saved in book 5 is relevant and a full fledged character now.

-The Luidaeg is a sympathetic character and a consistent ally in the series but BOY does she have her moments. Egads. (Quentin, who adores her, was NOT amused. We'll see how that shakes out...)

The Luidaeg just.. resurrecting an extinct race here. No big deal. I'm sure this has zero future implications.

-oh fuck the Babylon Road is back. Oh shit book 3 vibes. Oh shit

-lmao they literally end up in Blind Michael's lands. Just fuck me up

-ok theres a line that basically implies Blind Michael wasn't even that bad of a guy at one point, that he did The Ride with the best of intentions and for the life of me I am trying to figure out what they mean by that

-also intentional parallel between Blind Michael and Simon with the whole "best of intentions" thing.. Simon started as like, the arch villain. And now look where we are. So what is that implying about Blind Michael? 🤔

-I mean Blind Michael is the closest this series has come to a Dark Lord character. He was fucking awful. I'm interested to see if we are going to explore from a different angle?

-Goddamn world tour here showing up in Annwn.

-Oh duchess Riordan.. she's so pleasant. I'm glad we get to see what the fuck she's been up to since being trapped there

-Oh fuck they found Officer Thornton. He is not Well. I remember speculating what we were going to do with that plot thread lol

Are you FUCKING kidding me

-That was book SEVEN. I fucking REMEMBER that part. August was a fucking throwaway background character??? Chekhov's missing sibling?

-And it was intentional because of the door thing! She was described in a weird amount of detail for a background character! What the fuck!

-AAAND we found August. And the first thing she did was attack and basically turn October almost human. Whoops.

-And she doesn't recognize Simon. Her father. Because the Luidaeg's price was her way "home". Which includes Simon. Yikes

-omg Simon's magic finally smells like it does in flashbacks before he got corrupted. Smoke and mulled cider. Maybe I'm kinda sappy but I like that that paralleled the whole redemption arc thing

;____; FUCK dude

-October accidentally makes herself almost entirely human to save Simon. Whoopsie daisy!

FUCK DUDE ;______; full redemption arc shit there I'm gonna cry

-OK so I'm inserting this after finishing the book. And I realize this sounds like a MAJOR "not as much of an asshole as you could have been" award. But Simon had NO reason to treat Toby well. And he certainly did not in the brief glance of him in the book 1 prologue. That's changed by his second appearance (book 8). She's a changeling (always seen as inferior in Fae society) and she's the bastard child of his wife. He has every reason to treat her like shit. Yet he doesn't. He seems to want to be a father figure for her, even though she isn't really his blood related daughter, and this book reinforces that attitude. He even gives up things he wants--on multiple occasions--in order to save October, simply because he wants to. Compare him to his wife, October's actual biological mother, someone who literally created her as an expendable coping mechanism and resents the fact she's still alive? Despite everything he is WAY more of a parent to her. Found family sure is a thing in this series, huh.

-i like how instead of going all emo that she turned basically human October's just like "oh yeah I was raised in a street gang" and beats the absolute SHIT out of August

-Simon: uh excuse me did you just hit my daughter in the back of the head with a CLUB

October: she'll be fine

Well SHIT. The other shoe dropped, but not how I expected it.

-Like Simon genuinely redeemed himself, saving both August AND October despite everything. And he just sacrificed all of it. That was the final price of redemption for him. Yikes. YIKES. Like I knew it wouldn't be that easy, but this SUCKS.

-And this basically states that he wont be back to normal until fucking Oberon returns. I know the series has been leading up to that but... when the fuck. That seems like it would be the endgame.

-this is somehow worse than killing him off. How the fuck.

-August might have some redeeming traits. Shes an asshole but she is genuinely distressed when she realizes what Amandine did to October. Amandine? I'm pretty sure theres nothing to redeem her at this point. Shes fucking terrible.

-Jazz and Tybalt come back.. completely traumatized. Yeah. Ok. This entire last third is just complete despair I guess.

And award for "bleakest ending in the series" goes to...

-i think "The Brightest Fell" is the most fitting title in the series. It works on so many levels and for multiple characters. Especially in the context of the Shakespeare quote.

-i have.. thoughts. I think I'm going to do a compilation of said thoughts when I finish the next book and am officially caught up.

For now, there is also a novella @ the end so I will read that!

-"Of Things Unknown" (the novella) can basically be summarized by:

It's cool to get April's perspective! And some good old fashioned "resurrect your gays" on top of it.

-The Luidaeg: hey toby you know how you brought me back to life? You probably should not have been able to do that. You probably should not make a habit of raising the dead.

Toby: *resurrects like 5 characters who got killed off in book 2*

The Luidaeg: *breaking down the door* What the FUCK did I just say

-I am sure that January (a fucking month name) being resurrected has absolutely no future implications whatsoever :')

-Oh god theres one book left then I'm caught up. At least the novella softened the gut punch that was this book a little bit.

[mandaloriangf]

reasons why detroit become human makes no goddamn fucking sense beyond just the shitty allegory (aka i nitpick the fuck out of this game)

captain allen refuses to give connor any information about daniel despite this being a hostage situation and connor is there to diffuse it

also allen says that if connor doesnt take care of it he will and if he could why didnt he??

connor can reconstruct crime scenes with so little information that theres no way he could come to his deduction. for example in the first chapter he figures out that the father was holding something when daniel shot him despite there being NO WAY he could know this

theres segregation despite the fact that androids are servants to humans??? how are androids supposed to work for humans if they’re barred from entering certain places??

TEMPORARY PARKING????????????

unemployment is at 35% yet the economy is booming????

unemployed people blame androids for stealing their jobs despite the fact that androids did not get a choice and were made to do certain jobs. their anger should be directed toward cyberlife

markus shows emotion and has a distinct personality before becoming deviant like why does he even need to become deviant when he clearly already is??

carl’s on the nose monologuing. 

carl says lets see where we left off and when markus takes down the tarp theres a finished painting. carl makes like five strokes lol. 

he also makes the same “oh my god” no matter what markus paints

PRESS X TO SADNESS

how does todd afford kara and alice when he doesnt have a job

and why does he live on ethan mars’ street 

and the biggest issue - ALICE IS AN ANDROID??????????

seriously how do android children work? whats the point???? if people hate androids why would they pay money to take care of one????????????????????

honestly how do they work? because alice can sleep but she doesnt eat????? and shes not gonna age so what happens to child androids? do they just have their memories wiped and get bought by another parent????

and if alice is an android, why does todd say kara needs to help with alice’s homework? she doesnt go to school! its addressed in the same fucking chapter!

and why doesnt alice saying anything to kara like hey stop trying to ask me if i want food i dont eat because im a fucking android

also kara figures out that alice is an android at the very beginning yet just ignores it?? i guess??????

and alice has a picture in her keepsake box of todd, his wife, and his biological daughter?? why???????? kill me

todd leaves his drugs in the laundry detergent, makes kara do the laundry, and then gets mad when she finds the drugs

HE MAKES HIS ROBOT TURN ON HIS ROOMBA LSAKDJFLKSJDFLKJSDF

no one does anything when connor enters a bar that doesnt allow androids

also its never explained in game (i think) why connor does the coin trick. i suppose it can be up to the player (i see it as a nervous habit/fidget device but you could also argue its for recalibration)

no one checks the attic of carlos’ house??? and his android hid up there for THREE WEEKS????????????

connor is designed to work “harmoniously with humans” but they gave him a forensics lab on his tongue so he literally just puts blood in his mouth in a crime scene alsdjflsjflajsdlfjdlj

kara serves alice dinner and alice actually sits there but she wont eat BECAUSE SHES AN ANDROID

the guy that comes on the bus doesnt bat an eye when he sees an android in the human section of the bus (i almost threw up typing that)

leo can survive that????????

carl doesnt try to reason with the cops before they shoot markus

why do deviants self destruct in stressful situations? we dont know. we dont fucking know. 

connor can show genuine compassion to carlos’ android but doesnt seem bothered by it????

why is there such an extensive android scrapyard? first of all theres android resale shops (yuck) and parts are probably expensive, plus androids have existed for what? ten years at the most? theres no way cyberlife would just allow perfectly good android parts to be thrown away this makes no fucking sense

MARKUS CAN JUST PULL OFF HIS LED LIKE ITS A STICKER

A STICKER

seriously if its that easy whats the point? they already dress androids a certain way, why have the led except to know what androids are thinking? and if theyre thinking dont they have some level of free will?? (for example kara’s turns red when todd threatens her)

no one recognizes kara despite being a relatively common model like yeah she eventually changes her hair and clothes but she’s still got the same face lkadjfalsjdfljsdlfj

connor is unfazed when he’s shot but looks like he’s in pain when gavin punches him??? 

connor is able to get a confession from carlos’ android but can’t make small talk asdjflskjdfljdf

the whole chapter where markus finds jericho doesnt like have a lot wrong its just REALLY tedious

though the jump scares are stupid

ra9 is constantly referenced (particuarly in connor’s story) but doesnt go anywhere. at all. unless i missed something. but as far as i know its never explained who ra9 is. 

(i think its markus)

the deviant in the pigeon filled apartment is just chilling in the attic? why do androids always stay in the same place instead of escaping????

the androids in jericho are really just hanging out in an abandoned, rusting ship doing nothing. like theyre shutting down bc they dont have blue blood and incompetents but no one thinks to go get any until markus rallies them. 

also what is up with lucy? why does she talk like she can see the future

THE ENTIRE ZLATKO CHAPTER HAPPENS AT ALL

no seriously!!!!! you expect me to believe kara would just go to the address given to her by some random garbage collector android in the middle of the night which leads to a creepy house with a creepy guy with BLUE BLOOD ON HIS FINGERS who wants to take kara into the basement alone to remove a tracker she clearly doesnt have??????????????????????? she would’ve just booked it

KARA ACTUALLY GETS IN THE MACHINE AND IS SURPRISED ZLATKO IS GOING TO ERASE HER MEMORY

that android that says “whos the real monster” PLEASE MR CAGE MY NOSE IS SORE

connor just fucking breaks the window and jumps in alflskdjflskjfljsdljfkdsfljldsafskdf

putting hank under cold water sobers him up somehow

the game thinks it needs to spell out for me in actual letters on the screen that hank is suicidal despite the fact that you find him unconscious on the floor with alcohol and a gun AND he says he was playing russian roulette. 

connor petting sumo is cute but sumo looks like he’s from a ps2 game

markus magically develops the ability to “convert” androids so to speak. 

im telling you, he’s ra9

the whole eden club thing is very...icky

like the androids are literally put in tubes like wtf

the tracis have a relationship despite club policy of wiping memories every two hours

also im pretty sure they have the same face...?? why is this not addressed more 

hank hates androids but likes it when connor spares them?

kara, luther, and alice dont just stay in the car for the night

luther brings up that theres something off about alice but gets interrupted. this is not the first time it happens. it happens THREE TIMES in total before the reveal she’s an android

the jerrys break the windows like zombies and then are like “dont shoot we come in peace”

the carousel scene is cute but where did the power come from???

connor starts showing signs of deviancy but doesnt notice it??? and amandas just like “stop it” and does nothing about it saljdflsjdflsjkdf

markus does the fake phone call right in front of the person he’s calling

who brought the box up to the bathroom? was it the deviant that connor can interrogate???? explain pls

pick up the bag. carry the bag. put down the bag. open the bag. kill me. 

THEY GET OUT ONTO A WINDOW WASHING LIFT BUT THEN RAPPEL UP?????????????????

a giant screen that says rise as markus and north are going up the building

markus removes his skin for the broadcast (ew) to conceal his identity BUT IT REVEALS HIS SERIAL NUMBER THAT CONNOR LATER SCANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

north straight up wants to murder other androids for android freedom

no one finds simon on the roof unless connor goes up there

no one hears connor and the deviant fighting in the kitchen and no one hears connor calling out for help

rose is literally just 2038 harriet tubman

she compares what is happening to androids to what happened to black people in the past yet david cage expects me to believe this game isn’t about racism

kara believes that they will find refuge in canada because there are no android laws there, however the reason they dont have android laws is because CANADA HATES ANDROIDS JUST AS MUCH AS THE US

she has literally no reason to believe they’ll be able to survive in canada. theyd have to act like the cullens and move around all the time. 

ntm if androids and their parts aren’t being manufactured, if anything happens to kara, alice, or luther theyre fucked!

markus had to choose between two very black and white options: violence or pacifism. i have a HUGE problem with how this is done bc being peaceful results in the “good” ending while being violent results in the bad “ending 

(and for the record, going with a violent revolution can still result in freedom for androids. its just a LOT harder to keep everyone alive)

basically it completely misunderstands how real life oppression works and assumes that if a marginalized group is peaceful, public opinion will go up

thats not how it fucking works dipshit cage

kamski is literally just a weird combination of oscar isaac in ex machina and jared leto in blade runner 2049

like he’s left so ambiguous that you can’t even come to your own conclusion

connor can remark that chloe is pretty and seems sincere but doesnt question himself????

if you choose not to shoot chloe, you get nothing. you either have to replay the chapter and shoot her or look it up yourself. and im not fucking shooting her.

markus and north become “lovers” during a normal conversation 

seriously. when it happened my mom and i were like ???????????????

yet markus can’t romance simon despite having more chemistry

and on that topic why can’t kara romance luther???? they have a lot of chemistry too.

the freedom march. just. ugh.

like markus really leads a bunch of androids down a street shouting “EQUAL RIGHTS” lkjasldfjlakjfjldf

markus evolves to the point where he can just look at androids and convert them like what

north and josh clearly both have a death wish

if i have to hear “we were going to crack the case” one more time i will kill david cage myself. do cops even talk like that?

gavin just straight up tries to murder connor????

THEY START PUTTING ANDROIDS IN CAMPS?????????????????? AS IF THE REST OF THE GAME WASN’T BAD ENOUGH????????????????????????

kara finds out alice is an android and luther has to spell out all her feelings for her??? like why would she stop loving alice skalfsjdlfkjdlfj theyre both androids

the fact that connor even has a machine story line

carl just straight up dies while markus is venting about his oppression asdjfsjflskjflkejiofjeijfoejflkjsflsj

we dont get any kind of resolution to connor going deviant. he just suddenly is. how does he feel about it? who cares!

“ask us something only the real connor would know”

why is that human couple with the baby so upset about not getting out of detroit? theyre human. they’ll be fine. i feel no guilt in taking their tickets.

alice can arguably forgive todd as he explains he just wanted to prove he’s a good dad. boo hoo. he’s still a dick. 

connor can suddenly wake up androids too???? 

markus can really save the androids by kissing north or singing. 

like

that actually

happens

KILL ME

the president looks like hillary clinton but has a “was a celebrity with no political experience” trump like background

[ninjakitty15]

Chapter 8: Fear The Reaper (Loki X OFC Pairing)

To say Loki was a complicated demi god, would be more of an understatement than saying Tony Stark is a decent techie or engineer. He had more facets than the world's most perfectly cut diamond and more layers than an ogre made of onions. Lucky for me, the first few layers were just leather and metal and some really fancy fabric from a destroyed planet/realm. He wasn't kidding about the not sharing part either, in that he became not so much overly possessive per say but he was prepared to let the multiverse know no one could have me but him. Case and point, propping himself up and over me, an arm on either side of my head almost as if he was using himself to keep me in and others out. There was also love bites in several very visible spots I didn't have the heart to tell him would heal before I would leave the bedroom we ended up in. He paused between kisses he stole from me to watch me intently below him and lifted one hand up to cup my face, tilting a bit so his eyes met my heavily lidded ones. "No matter how much death comes for me, I still want more."

I chuckled at his blatant pun. "We could keep going but I think at some point you'd be pegged a necrophiliac."

"Isn't that how most people want to go out, death by violently passionate love?" he purred. "Am I too much for you then, love?"

I snickered at the challenge. "Heavens to murgatroid no, not a bad way to go though, you're right on that."

"Then pray tell, why the pause? You shouldn't be thinking as hard as I feel right now."

"I'd have more energy if certain polarities were reversed."

It was his turn to pause then as he was trying to figure out what I was getting at. "My magic is making you more mortal than necessary, but wouldn't changing that make you numb again?"

"I told you I can still feel extremes normally, not when you're switching me back to life."

"Why do I feel like there's another reason you want to do that?"

Damn him and his clever mischievous natural scheming detector. "What other reason could there be?"

"Why don't you tell me?" he dropped his head to bury itself in my neck, finding the sweet spot and sucking, nipping on it till I squirmed under him.

"I've had you as an Asgardian god, now I wanna try a Frost Giant."

"Ever the curious creature you are. You sure you want this, the effects could be dangerous."

"What? Like frostbite? That's just flesh dying of the cold, I'm already dead, no biggie. Stop asking if I'm sure, you glorified smurf." And suddenly emeralds turned to glittering rubies and the room became much cooler. I reached up with both hands and pulled his head to mine, kissing him passionately, the cold never bothered me anyway.

"You two are worse than bunnies," Tony commented much later while we were all in one of his meeting rooms for the next mission.

"Says the man that used to take a different woman home every other night," Loki quipped.

"We'd be worse than bunnies if I was prego right now but literally nothing is alive in me so your argument is invalid," I told Tony. "Bunnies aren't that great to begin with anyway, oh sure they look all cute and fuzzy but they poop everywhere, aren't great housepets and die quite easy in extreme tempts which is unfortunately the kind of temps New England is known for. Great waste of fluff and space bunnies."

Everyone in the meeting room turned to me then with different expressions but the same basic principle of "wtf" about my little rant.

"What kind of pets do you like then?" asked Clint.

"Cats. Mostly self sufficient, don't need to be constantly cared for, don't hog the bed when they want cuddles, what more can you want in a pet. Anyway, why are we all here? You interrupted my naptime."

"Spoken like a true cat person," mused Tony. "Seems there's some undead activity nearby that requires our attention."

"Don't look at me, they only come when I ask."

"Which means that there's another necromancer around that's not playing by the rules you do."

"Well you know how it is, suddenly you have the power to raise an army and it gets to your head. In an unrelated story, beheading works best in stopping power hungry necromancers."

"Does shooting the head work the same or do we have to actually separate the skull from the body?" asked Steve.

"Afraid to get a little messy, Steve-o? You're dealing with monsters here, you're gonna get messy or you're next."

"Did you just threaten Captain America?" asked Tony in mock shock. "I'm liking you more and more."

I smirked. "Depending on the level of power they have, even the most lethal of shots or slashes can heal if its clean. Loki, a dagger please?" Loki straightened an arm and one slid out of his sleeve and into an open palm which he then handed to me almost uncertainly. I took the blade and slid it against my wrist as an example. For a moment blackened blood oozes out of the cut before it sealed itself back up and the blood was absorbed back into my body. "If clean wounds are all you know, I strongly suggest any number of horror films with gore and violence warnings on the rating for ideas."

"I'm sorry I'm slightly confused here, earlier you were telling us how there's so few of you guys left yet here you are telling us how to cut you down more..." Clint spoke up.

"There's two types of necromancers, those that do their job and those that steal from the honeypot, I don't care about the latter, they disrupt the natural order we're meant to abide by. If that means we reach white rhino status, then so be it, I can live with that."

"Remind us again what white rhino status means?" asked Steve.

"You can count how many of those beasties are in existence today on one hand and still have a few free fingers, they've been hunted by poachers for their horn to near extinction and the few left are now under armed guards to ensure that doesn't happen."

"I've got a question about dead animals," Tony spoke up. "Have you tried raising them?"

"They've been on this planet a lot longer than we have and we cause them enough grief destroying it and them along with it, I leave them alone as they deserve to rest more than we do."

"What about dinosaurs, think of what you could do with your own T-rex," Clint noted.

"Ok firstly there's an entire franchise of movies explaining exactly why it's a terrible idea to resurrect dinosaurs, i mean their name even means terrible lizard. Secondly there wouldn't be much left of them to resurrect, they're millions of years old and there's a reason we only see casts and not the actual bones of them. They're brittle as fuck, the actual bones are kept in a temperature controlled vault in a basement somewhere. Sure, it would look cool as hell having an army of angry monster skeletons behind you but the second they get close to the enemy, they're literally dust. Nice try though."

"So just stick to humans then," Tony noted.

"Fuck yeah."

"So you couldn't resurrect someone old enough, say George Washington?" Clint asked.

"Putting aside the fact that every single person that knows about him or seen his portraits remembers him as a stiff stoic and heroic first president and bringing back a grinning corpse because if there's anything left of him still hanging around its gonna be bones and tattered clothes aka nightmare fuel. It also takes a lot more effort to bring back moldy oldies because not only would they have probably been at peace in their final resting place a lot longer and don't wanna go back to the fucked up world we made it in their absence, theres a lot more effort in putting them together before they rise. Any other erroneous questions and misconceptions?"

"I've got one," Tony piped up. "You've said you only feel extremes most of the time and I'm curious, can you taste pain too? I'm convinced you're actually Liv Moore under an alias."

"She couldn't control other zombies, just support and help them survive the human population that didn't like them. I could stomach a lot of spices when I was still human I think, so I can only assume I'd be ok now, why?"

"Ever had a Carolina Reaper?"

"You've been dying to challenge someone on that haven't you, pun intended."

"What's a Carolina Reaper?" Loki murmured beside me.

"One of the most painfully edible things ever bred," Clint answered for me.

"If it's so painful, why eat it then, food's meant to be enjoyed."

"Some people don't taste the pain, they taste the spice, the heat and that's what they want. So I highly recommend you don't try what I'm about to do. Tony, I accept your challenge...I'd smack you with a gauntlet but this is the 21st century," I replied.

"Why shouldn't I try this reaper, I'm a god you dead creature."

"God or not, you are a Frost Giant and this food is barely edible fire, you will be one of the reasons it's called a reaper and I'm not sure I want to bring you back to life, I only ever resurrect mortals." Tony handed me one of the bright red peppers, a whole one, not something seasoned with a reaper, not a slice, a whole fucking pepper. I took it carefully, touching as little as possible in the event I needed to rub my eyes after this ordeal and examined it curiously. "Well, it was nice knowing you all, Loki, if I don't make it back, avenge me, you have my blessing." I looked Tony in the eyes and took all but the stem and leaves in my mouth before biting down.

"How exactly does this pepper kill someone though?" Loki asked while watching me.

"The spiciness irritates the inside of your mouth so much that it inflames it, causing you to choke and suffocate essentially while you're sweating like you've run a marathon through hell so not only are you essentially becoming dehydrated but you're oxygen is cut off," explained Tony.

I chewed the evil pepper and all at once it was like eating a piece of hell itself, my entire body felt like it was on fire, not just my mouth and I had to shut my eyes to swallow like a frog, my whole body going stiff from the pain, and slammed a fist down on the meeting table before finally getting rid of it in my stomach. "That's a spicy meatball-a," I stated in a horrible Italian accent. "Anyone else wanna try food from hell? Where's Thor, he's always up for doing stupid shit like this."

Loki snorted unceremoniously. "Off playing hero somewhere or making sure his people don't get into more trouble than he does, no doubt. Give me one."

"You can try a slice of Jalapeno before you play with the big guns."

"Are you actually denying the god of mischief some fun?" Clint asked me.

It was my turn to snort. "I've given him more fun in bed than he'd find from anyone else on this planet, what I'm doing is making sure he doesn't die from a dumb challenge. The only thing missing from this redneck fun is someone saying hold my beer."

"That's because my brother is elsewhere," replied Loki. "I'll have your Holopino."

Tony disappeared to the nearest kitchen and then returned with chips and Jalapeno dip with actual slices mixed into the cheesy goodness. "You're not lactose intolerant are you?"

"I highly doubt that's actual cheese and not the processed american cheese most cheese dips here are made of," I noted.

Loki took a chip and pretty much coated the entire piece in the dip then shoved it in his mouth all at once. He didn't break out in a sweat like most weak stomached people would but then maybe Frost Giants don't do that, he also didn't choke or spit it out and managed to swallow the whole thing without complaint though he was a master of lies for a reason, his poker face was second to none. "On the scale of pain, where is the Holopino?"

"It's one of the least spicy peppers this planet has though still pretty spicy. The seeds of any spicy pepper though are what you want to avoid more than the flesh or juice though you don't want the juice either as that shit can get anywhere, people have gone blind because they got the juice on their hands, didn't wash it off well or at all and then rubbed their eyes for whatever reason. Smart people that cook with spicy peppers wear latex gloves, everyone else tempts fate."

"You're worried something spicy and edible could kill me," he mused.

"Everything is edible once," I retorted. "And there's plenty of edible things that can kill anyone, just add poison, hell we eat at least two kinds of poisonous plants without realizing its potential, potatoes and tomatoes are both belladonnas which is the most poisonous plant this planet has."

"How exactly do you know all that about poisons?" Nat asked.

"Like no one else has ever thought about ways to sneak poison into someone's drink before, if you tell me otherwise then you're a liar. There's a song by my favorite band about slipping cleaning solution into someone's coffee."

"No wonder you two are so close, so much potential to do good but so tempted to do otherwise, meant for each other really," Tony mused.

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

"We'll see. Now that I had my initial fun though, back to what I called you all here for. We have ourselves a zombie outbreak...never thought I'd say that, but there's a first time for everything. While I get the feeling you could probably handle zombies on your own, this should still be a team effort for damage control and whatnot so everyone suit up and ship out."

I grinned." You heard him, Autobots, let's roll out!"

"Sometimes you're worse than Peter with the pop culture references," muttered Tony.

"Where is the little bug anyway?"

"At school like the good genius he is, it is a week day after all and no longer summer."

"Wait a sec, it's...the fall?" I asked excitedly.

"...Yes?"

I grinned. "Things are starting to turn up Milhouse."

"Why is it a good thing for it to be autumn?" asked Loki as we made our way to the jet thing.

"I'm strongest during that season."

There were definitely zombies afoot, not a whole lot thankfully which usually meant the rogue necromancer that raised them was either doing something small scale or wasn't that much a threat and didn't have the power to raise a full army. Either way sucks to be them. I hung back in the jet as zombies themselves were super easy to handle, it was just a matter of finding the weasel that got them there and dealing with them. Loki hung back as well as you really didn't need god powers to deal with the walking dead, just something to separate the head from the body. So it was basically Clint, Nat, Tony, and America's Ass knocking heads and taking names.

"You think Thor will be pissed he's not part of the party?" I mused to Loki.

The golden god grinned at the thought of his brother being the whiny baby he knew he was. "He did particularly enjoy a similar situation to this one, fighting off the undead, despite losing our home in the end. He's not needed though so he can bloody deal with it."

"Maybe we shouldn't tell him and pretend like nothing's happened that he'd miss." Our eyes met for a moment before we both grinned wickedly. "Nah." I pressed my com out of curiosity to see how things were going outside. "Found the rogue yet?"

"All I see are dead people," came Clint's response first, causing me to crack up at the quote.

"Ha, it's not just me quoting movies now, Tony, check and mate."

"Clint, don't encourage her," grumbled Tony on the com.

"This is way easier than I expected zombies to be, I feel like I'm in a video game and this is like one of the first few levels," Clint stated.

"If the music changes, get ready for the big boss fight," I warned him.

"Anything we should look for in finding said big boss? Features that sets him apart like with you?" asked Nat.

"Only the more advanced look like death for reasons, I highly doubt this one is so look for the one that stationary or moving at a normal pace and not currently rotting at the same time. The zombies are either a distraction or sentinels so go in the opposite direction as them to find the boss. On that note, can I have a go at whoever it is, they're under my department, I feel like I should take some responsibility for it...adulting and what not."

"If there's anything else after we're done, maybe," Tony answered.

"Sharing is caring."

"Good thing I don't care then."

Another few minutes went by. "You say its easy dealing with zombies yet there's still no progress otherwise, what's going on out there? Has the music changed yet?"

"Still can't find the bastard, even when I switch to heat vision to seek out living from undead it's still all dead things," grumbled Tony. "Are we even sure he's in this area? Maybe this whole thing is a diversion from another place?"

I groaned in frustration and stood up stiffly. "This is taking too long, I'm gonna miss the Farmers Market!" I stormed out of the jet, Loki in tow of course, and walked out into the battlefield, power flowing into my hands before I shot it at every dead body near me still walking that collapsed immediately, the connection from them to their initial power source cut off.

"Nell, what the hell are you doing?" demanded Tony.

"Your job for you, I want a raise after this too." I grabbed hold of a zombie's head without cutting the connection and instead followed the connection to the source while Loki made sure there were no interruptions. "Found em." I cut the connection of that zombie after and had Loki teleport me right to the source which thankfully was still in the area just very well hidden. I let go of Loki's hand from him teleporting us and took a bee line right to the bastard who's back was turned to me. I grabbed him by the head and smashed it against the wall of the building he was hidden in. Thankfully, he was still conscious for me to play with and held his head with a grown before turning around onto his back to face me and the look on his face was just too perfect to post on instagram.

"Nell! Y-you're...you're," he stuttered in terror.

"I'm what?" I growled at him, not wasting any time as I reached down and grabbed him by the shirt, throwing him into another wall and going after him before he could scamper away.

"You're back," he squeaked. "They told me..."

"Who told you?" I demanded, a hand wrapping around his neck tight and holding him hard against the wall behind him.

One hand of his was around the hand around his neck trying to get me off him while I wasn't so blind to not notice the other reaching for something behind his back, a flash of metal telling me exactly what he was planning and even before Loki would take out his own blades, I caught his free hand that held a certain lethal dagger and broke his wrist while my nails dug into his neck so he couldn't catch his dagger as it dropped. I kicked it away from both of us. "You know who I am, then you know what your options are now. Who told you?"

Both his hands were now trying to pry my one off him and I only gave him enough air to speak and not die just yet. "We're either the hunted or the hunters, that's what they told me. They told me your head would be mounted on a wall when they caught you."

I pulled him from the wall only to slam him back against it in rage, he was working for the people, helping them hunt the rest of us, that caught me. "How did they find me?"

"I don't know!" he croaked.

"Try again." Another slam against the wall.

"I swear I don't know! I was told about you after it had already happened!"

"Nell," Steve of all people said suddenly behind me. "He's more useful to us alive."

"I disagree," I growled. "The dead are so much more cooperative."

A new level of fear filled the traitor's face, he definitely knew what his options were now. He looked past me to Loki who was simply watching the whole scene play out without a word or a motion otherwise then to Steve. "Help me! Please!"

"He's not in the business of helping people he's been trying to shut down his entire life," I reminded him coldly.

"Loki, can't you stop this?" Steve asked him.

"I am not her commander nor master, I do not as you would say, call the shots."

"Nell, drop him," Nat came in saying. "I know what you're feeling, I know what you've been through, this isn't the way to handle it."

I vaguely wondered what would happen if I killed the rat in my grasp, would the Avengers come at me, kick me out of the compound? Would I be their next mission? Would Loki come with me or stay with them? That last one got my attention and I glanced back at Loki then and our eyes met. "You aren't my master, but I still need you."

Loki was silent for a moment, taking in the hidden message I hoped his caught from that statement. It probably wasn't fair to make him choose between the ones he had probably sworn to team up with, and some dead chick he just met and banged a bunch but I needed to know who I could trust when my own people were turning on me. "And you have me," he finally responded.

I relaxed the smallest bit at the answer and was about to finish off my prey before Tony in all his armored glory burst in from the ceiling, his iron mask off so he was legit staring me down with his blaster hands poised. "You want answers from him as much as we do, right? We can get more out of him alive when all his nerve endings are still working. I don't want you to be our next big enemy here but if you kill him, you will be, and Hydra will be the least of your worries."

While the threat was barely accurate considering Hydra had more intel than Tony did on us and had a lot more minions to give the intel to, I really didn't want more enemies than I already had. I grumbled in annoyance and threw the rat to Tony then before picking up the dagger that had threatened to kill me for good and examined it, Loki stepping over to me and eyeing the blade curiously. "Did you mean that?" I asked.

"I might be known as the Lord of Lies but I always keep my word."

The rat was grabbed by Tony and surrounded by the other Avengers who guarded and guided him out of the building, Loki and myself taking the tail end. The second the rat stepped outside however, he crumbled with a bullethole in his skull, a larger one as small bullets don't always do the trick with death mages. Clint took out the Hydra sniper instantly without a second thought but the prisoner was already dead. I cackled when Nat took his nonexistent pulse at the pure irony of the situation. "You see what happens, the universe always provides. You had your chance, now it's my turn. You might wanna take the body back first before they actively try to keep it from rising again though."

Tony just frowned at my reaction and shook his head. "You are a piece of work, you know that?"

I grinned and shrugged. "Thought you liked a challenge?"

He just shook his head again. "Not even Loki was this chaotic when he first joined us."

"That's because you forced contraptions on me that dampened my powers till I behaved like you wanted," Loki retorted dryly.

"You put a fucking bark collar on him? He's a god, not a dog, you dyslexic dildo!"

"Whoa, easy there, Night Queen, this is the same guy that tried to take NYC some years back."

I snorted. "Fuck NYC, their sports teams suck and so do they."

Loki took my hand in his and I felt calm suddenly and glanced over at him questionably. "You don't have to defend me, you know?"

"Yeah well, I got my vengeance stolen by the universe just now and nowhere else to direct my rage, so sue me."

"The universe doesn't steal, it takes what belongs to it, therefore you weren't meant to kill him so relax for now," he argued.

I frowned at the questionable but near flawless logic and grumbled under my breath. "Stupid sexy Frost Giant."

[pizzamaximoff]

The Sketch Artist’s Obsession (Jerome Valeska x Artist! Reader)

Here’s a request for @avengers-and-jedis , I’m so sorry its late I've been bogged down with a bunch of school work and assessments AND Inktober. Again I’m so sorry I didn't get it done earlier but damn I’m tired af. I’ve had to change up a little of the canon storyline just to do this how I wanted to. Just adding in some lil bits to add to the case to fit in with the reader being an artist. BTW they sent me some hella good art of Jerome and it kinda inspired parts of this.

Word count: 2,701

Working in the Gotham City Police department had its ups and downs. Sure it was dark and generally solum with petty criminals being filed in everyday and new cases being raised and brought to attention. That was something Gotham was never short of: crime. Yet with all the misery brought in you can’t help but find it thrilling, even though you were the lead sketch artist you still end up working with the main department, often being present for various interrogations.

It was a a cold day when you first met Jerome Valeska. A light snow covered the city but the office was warm with life, yet it wasn’t a reassuring warmth. More like that of raging fire. Full of anger. Making your way from the break room to your quaint little office you stopped in your track in shock at your surroundings. The department was heaving: an entire circus was literally brought in, their brightly coloured costumes contrasting against the dark office area. Your mouth was slightly ajar, shocked at the odd scene you were witnessing. Detectives and officers kept two groups of the circus workers apart. One clearly being clowns, their makeup heavy and costumes absurd. Judging from the tight spandex of the other groups you made an educated guess that they were acrobats. It was obvious their was some form of family feud going on here. The absurdity of the whole situation made you laugh quietly to yourself. You were about to move to your tiny office when you heard your name being called out amongst the babble of angry performers. You turned to see Detective Gordon waving you over, his face dark and brooding as usual. You weaved in an out of the various people clogging up the department to reach him, letting out a sigh once you emerged from the mass. 

“What is it Jim?” You asked. He smiled lightly at you, the dark mood in his features lifting for a moment. You had always been the department baby, being the youngest there, he had a soft spot for you. “Just as a precaution, I might need you, the victim’s son said he saw a strange individual around the circus but has no idea who he is. An outsider” He spoke giving you a small pat on the shoulder before leading you into the small office. You rolled your eyes at this, instantly certain that your witness wouldn't be able to give you much to go on. It wouldn't be the first time. Placing your work sketchbook and pencil set on the desk you took a seat next to Jim. Looking up you finally noticed the boy in the room. His fiery red hair was parted and swept to the side neatly. Slight sniffles, the lasting remnants of tears, shook his body in every few moments. Your initial distaste was dropped in an instant as sympathy for the boy filled you. He wasn't much younger than you by the looks of it and you instantly felt terrible for him, if you were in his position you wouldn't be much different. “Hi Jerome, we just need to ask you a few questions to help us find out whoever murdered your mother” Jim spoke sincerely with a gentle but forced smile on his face. Jerome, as you now learnt, looked up from the desk. His sea green eyes were glazed over with tears threatening to spill, his nose and cheeks were a soft pink making him look delicate and vulnerable as ever. He quickly wiped his eyes before muttering a quiet ‘sure’. You couldn't help the small endearing smile     you sent him as he glanced over to you. His lips twitching ever so slightly in a shy manner.   Jim began to ask him questions and Jerome answered, clear and precisely. You listened intently but as you did so you were unequivocally aware of how pretty he was. Even in this state he was rather gorgeous. You managed to keep these views hidden, for your face was stoic. However it was when Jim asked him of his opinion on his mothers ‘love life’ you cracked. “Sex is a perfectly healthy and normal human activity, Detective” Usually you would be perfectly fine with this statement but with the lingering gaze he gave you and the faintest hint of a smirk you lost it. Your usually composed face was tinged with pink as you coughed lightly and fidgeted with the papers on the desk. As for Jim his eyes slightly widened before moving swiftly along. He asked of the unknown man and if Jerome had seen him before and where. This was your turn to step in. “As you said you got a clear view of this strange character, I’ll leave you with my colleague here to draw up a sketch of the man. With that it should be much easier to identify the suspects.” With a nod to you Jim exited the room leaving you and Jerome alone. You held your hand out to him with a smile. “Hi, I’m (Y/N), lead sketch artist at the precinct.” He softly held onto your hand and gave it a small shake. It was surprisingly warm, contrasting with the cold office. “We’re going to start with a general shape of the man and then move into the features. I’m going to need you to be as specific and with as much detail as possible so we can get the most accurate depiction, Is that okay?” You spoke as you opened the book to a fresh page, setting out your pencils. “That sounds good to me” He spoke, his voice seemed much more confident than before but you brushed it off as nothing, ready to begin the work.

Around half an hour later you were finished, the process being surprisingly easy and quick due to Jerome’s immense level of description of the man. You looked over the sketch, something about it seemed familiar but you couldn't place your finger on it. You passed the book to Jerome asking if it was correct. He let out a small noise of surprise before speaking. “Wow, that’s him, you managed to get it perfect…” He trailed up looking at you with awe. It was a heartwarming sight and you smiled brightly in response. You simply looked at each other for a moment, it was strange but comfortable yet it ended as soon as it began. You shook your head slightly and stood. He passed the book to you gently as you spoke quietly. “I’m going to hand this to the detectives, hopefully they can catch the guy who did this.” He looked down again sadness seemingly washing over him again. You reached the door and as you were about to leave you stopped abruptly before turning to face him over your shoulder. “Oh and Jerome,” He looked up quickly, eager to hear what you had to say,” If you ever want to talk, my office is the fourth on the left. Feel free to drop in anytime, don’t bother knocking I would love to chat sometime” And with one last smile shared between the pair of you, you left.

You waited for Jim and Leslie to finish their conversation with a blind elderly gentlemen before walking to them, sketchbook in hand. Exchanging a quick greeting to Leslie you turned to Jim presenting the page of the potential suspect. “Jerome says this is what the unidentified man at the circus looked like. I feel like I recognise him but I can’t pinpoint it” You explain to him, it takes him a few seconds before his eyes widen and shock registers on his face. He jogs to a computer, yourself and Lee following confused and intrigued. He delves into some files and soon after a newspaper scanning is brought onto the screen. A missing person of interest. Deacon Blackfire, for suspicion of leading the infamous Hellfire club. You gasped shocked at the sight. “Do you think he killed Lila?” Lee questioned excitement at the revelation in her voice. Jim shook his head, skeptical. “No, it doesn't make sense, Blackfire hasn't been seen in a decade. Its highly unlikely he comes back just to kill a snake dancer-“ You cut him off speaking yourself. “I’m not sure Jim, Jerome was certain it was him. Blackfire has a memorable face, theres not many psychos like him. You’ve got to at least take a look into this, Jerome lost his mother at least give him closure” Jim sighed, you  He was clearly unsure but with you and Lee both pestering him he promised to research into it the next day.

That night, you went home content. Hopeful in the crime being on its way to being solved. After entering your apartment and changing into something comfortable, you boiled the kettle and made a cup of chamomile. Popping the mug on the side table you then not-so-gracefully threw yourself into your armchair, pulling the throw over yourself. You reached for your personal sketchbook ready to express your emotions on the pages. Sharpened pencil in hand you began to draw, built up stresses leaving your body as the graphite dragged on the page. Clowns, acrobats and various characters danced around the edges of the page, you weren't concentrating on the specific subject of your drawings, just eager to create. Once the pages had been filled you placed the book on your lap content with your work. As you looked you halted, there in the centre of the many doodles was a sketch of Jerome. Your palm met your face and a hopeless sigh left your mouth. How did you not even realise you were drawing him? You had been with him for maximum an hour yet he he was forever in your book as a drawing. It came naturally to you, maybe it was his pretty face or gentle sweet nature that was hiding something beneath. Oh wouldn't you like to know what was lurking behind the piercing green eyes. You closed the book and placed it back on the side table. After finishing your tea you prepared for bed for it was late and you were already exhausted. You began to drifted into the realm of sleep, just before you passed over you could distantly hear the buzzing of your phone. Someone was calling you but you ignored it already too far gone. Whatever it was could wait till tomorrow.

You rushed into the precinct a hot mess. Hair was messy and clothes thrown together rather unprofessionally. You had slept in: kept in a blissful dream with a certain ginger. You stuck to the walls, not too keen on being scolded by Captain Essen for being late. You passed Harvey who gave you a quick look over before grinning. “Damn Kid, you look like you just came back from the dead. What happened?” Well at least someone was finding this funny. You rolled your eyes and gave a gruff response. “Slept in” before pushing past, deperately trying to ignore his loud laughter. You loved Harvey, he was a great guy, but damn was he annoying. You walked into your office and not paying attention to your office you walked straight into Jim. You apologised quickly and walked to the desk, not bothering to ask why he was in here. “We solved the case.” He spoke, you pricked up at this, however the dark expression on his face caused your stomach to churn. Did something bad happen, was Jerome hurt? “It wasn't Blackfire who killed Lila Valeska.” He walled towards you a brown case file in hand. Your head tilted in confusion. If not Blackfire than who? They had managed to solve it in the night so it can't have been too obscure a suspect. “It was Jerome.” With that he chucked the file on your desk. The mugshot spilling out. With shaking hands you lifted the photo, gasping in horror and shock. A manic smile twisted his features, this was not the same boy you met in that dark office. You look up at Jim, eyes wide. He held no emotion in his as he continued speaking. “He’s been sent to Arkham, the boy’s insane.” With no more words he left. Leaving you in your shock as you continued to stare at the photo in hand.

Months passed but you still thought of him. You knew it was wrong: he was criminally insane, the boy committed matricide! Yet the attraction never left. He found his way into pages upon pages of your books, getting to the point where you were drawing him at work and hiding from your colleagues. ‘It’s harmless’ you would tell yourself, just a school girl crush. He was locked away so its not like it would blossom into anything. A slightly odd obsession, yes but it would cause no issue. This was the case until you were all called into the main area of the department. A breakout in Arkham, a group of so called ‘Maniax’ were formed, causing chaos in Gotham. There he was. That insane grin, the shocking eyes and fire like hair. Jerome was out of Arkham. Your heart skipped a beat at the sight. Slipping away from the gathering of workers. Your breathing had quickened. Both fear and excitement coursing through your veins. He was out. You knew he was dangerous, yet the ‘love’ grew inside you.

Gunshots, screams, yells of agony and insane laughter. You hid under your desk shaking like an autumnal leaf. The precinct was being massacred. There was nothing you could do to protect yourself, your job didn't permit you to carry a weapon nor have you ever needed one. The best chance you had of survival was under the dark oak of the desk. Luckily it covered all view of you from the door, but it was an obvious hiding place. Your heart was thumping in your ears and breath shallow.  The door slammed open, almost being knocked straight off it’s hinges. Footsteps entered and the door was slammed shut again. Contrary to before your heart seemed to stop as the voice filled your mind. “(Y/N)! I’m back, you did say not to knock!” It was Jerome, his voice dipping with the confidence that you had only imagined you heard before. So that was the real him. “Although you might have to pay for that, does the insurance cover it?” a sickening cake bounced of the walls. It was deranged but in no way did you hate it. You were simply too shocked to respond, frozen in your state of disbelief. His steps got closer, the thin wood of the desk being the only thing separating you from his sight and him from yours. The sound of paper and pages being turned, were all to be heard. He was silent, absorbed in the work. “Well it seems like I have quite the admirer” he chuckled, it was low and raspy, incredibly attractive. A blush filled your face as you began to feel faint. Still without reply he continued.  “You”re as good as I remember, although I did prefer your pretty face to your amazing skills” His voice got closer; he was walking around the desk. His legs came into view. “I have to say (Y/N), this conversation is feeling rather one-sided,” he down to your level, his green eyes met your own (e/c) ones. “And I do remember you stating you’d love to chat.” That manic grin stretched onto his pale skin, which was stained with blood, you were unsure if it was his or another’s. At that moment you didn't care, a bright smile made its way onto your face. Shock flashed in his eyes for a short second. You spoke up for the first time. “I missed you, Jerome”. “Well Princess let’s get out of here” Pulling you out from the hiding spot he laughed again and you count help but join in with him. Deep in your head there was a voice, nagging at you to run, to stop this madness and ignore this obsession, but it was too late. You were already in the grasp of Jerome Valeska.

Sorry if its crap I'm having a shit life atm guys but I’ll try to post more often!!

[drpepperphd]

AYASES TOP 10 ALBUMS OF 2017

OH MAN WHAT A GOOD YEAR FOR MUSIC ! ! ! ! ! AND GAMES ! ! ! ! ! ! yknow what ! ! ! this was just a good year ! ! ! fuck what u all say ! ! ! anyways heres the list and under the cut ill talk about the album and have some Honourable Mentions ! LETS GO ! !

10: A Crow Looked At Me by Mount Eerie

9: Concrete Desert by The Bug vs. Earth

8: Time Away by Casey Lalonde

7: Savage Sinusoid by Igorrr

6: Outer Edges Remixes by Noisia

5: Someone Elses Story by CXDR

4: It Happens Too Briefly To Know by Jr. Adelberg

3: Romaplasm by Baths

2: World Eater by Blanck Mass

1: II by Phuture Doom

wow ! ! okay so lets talk about feelings bitch

A Crow Looked At Me; so like fuck thats a sad album huh ? its straight up just grieving But With Guitar. im a massive fan of mount eerie and like literally everything phil elverum ever does, so its unsurprising this made the cut in the end, but this is one of those albums where once its over youre just left there, probably crying, just like “well shit now what to do i do with my life”

Concrete Desert; years back the bug and earth did a 2 song split that to this day i still absolutely adore, so as soon as i heard they were making a full length album together, i kinda flipped my shit ! ! and it lived up to all my expectations, and then some ! the album perfectly captures both the gritty and noisy and cold and empty sounds that both the bug and earth make separately, and just mashes it into this beautiful and dark album

Time Away; so idk if anyone knows but i am a HUGE casey lalonde fan, their music has meant a lot to me and helped me through a lot, so its only fitting they drop an album this year and its beautiful as hell ! ! from start to finish, time away took me through a bunch of feelings, all relevant to this year, doing what casey lalonde does best and making an incredibly enjoyable and comfy album yet again

Savage Sinusoid; i mean shit igorrr sure as hell exists huh ! ! suddenly savage sinusoid is released and its god damn chaotic as hell, and really focuses more on the... lets say Guttural side of igorrrs music. i mean all good albums should start with a dude screaming his lungs out honestly

Outer Edges Remixes; so the first time i listened to the outer edges remixes i was in public, but that did not stop me from boppin my head and all that shit cause literally every song on this album goes the fuck OFF ! ! ! like i honestly cant say anything else its just incredible remixes of older noisia songs with their incredible style of their album Outer Edges

Someone Elses Story; oh my goodness here onwards things are probably gonna get lengthy and emotional ! ! so i absolutely Love every piece of music avery releases, her music has comforted and helped me for years, and i still remember the first time i heard her music with the album Lost No Longer, which to this day continues to be my Comfort Album. now this album carries that weight twofold, as this album is about the past 3 years for avery, which coincidentally is for how long her music has been helping me. now ngl, i definitely cried listening to this album, every song just hit a different part of me, and you can feel each emotion that shes experience over the past 3 years in just 9 songs. a beautiful way to wrap up her alias as cxdr, and come out publicly under the name avery, and i cant wait to see where her music goes next.

It Happens Too Briefly To Know; i honestly did not expect to come to love this album as much as i do now ! on the surface its good indie rock, not anything new but not too familiar either, playing with the genre with interesting changes in the pace of songs. changing the pace during songs more often than not. it felt simple enough, but slowly over time i just kept coming back to this album, listening to it over and over again, and ive really come to appreciate every minute detail of this album, not to mention the feeling of youth it seems to so expertly capture

Romaplasm; oh my god, oh my GOD. alright so i really love baths, and this is undeniably his best release yet, it nearly placed second on this list, but i think world eater just BARELY tops it, for entirely different reasons though. hearing such openly gay songs from a big artist is... incredibly refreshing to say the least, even if they can be incredibly depressing, with lyrics such as “queer in a way thats failed me”. this album goes on such an incredible journey through everything baths does so well, starting to bright and happy and reaching an incredibly depressing song only 2 songs later, which jumps right into an incredibly uplifting and headstrong track, basically continuing in weird patterns like this but somehow flowing really well, until it does what i loved about his album obsidian. what i loved about obsidian is how it progressively got darker and grittier, to the point where the final track had some distortion in it. this takes it to an entirely different level, by going in an entirely different way. this is done in the last 3 tracks, so from wilt to coitus the album grows softer, almost like its dying (not a hard conclusion to reach with such track names) to a point in coitus where it even fizzles out for lack of a better word. and as coitus ends, in comes broadback, an oddly happy sounding song, especially in contrast to the last few tracks. the lyrics on the other hand, definitely not so happy, but vaguely hopeful. then baths does something that he hasnt done in his music before. he screams. and he just screams “dont want you to die” over and over until the end of the song. words cannot explain what this album does to me, but good god it sure as shit does it

World Eater; with each release blanck mass has done, hes gotten progressively more Intense. his first album was just an ambient album, his second release was grittier, it actually had beats, and now theres world eater. when rhesus negative kicked in on my first time listening to world eater, i fucking lost it. its such an angry and intense and fast song, and it goes the fuck off. the album goes in and out of angry songs and softer songs, in such an entrancing way that even the worst track on the album is still amazing and something id just listen to on its own. id like to mention literally every track on the album and talk about it but that would just take up way too much time, but i do want to just say the rat and silent treatment are fucking incredible songs that are like nothing ive ever heard and everything about this album just fucking RULES

II; ever since this album dropped in march, it has been my album of the year, nothing swaying that opinion any other way. i god damn love phuture doom, and the whole arg and everything about the lead up to this album was god damn amazing, and when it was all finally uncovered and we all listened to it for the first time, it blew our fucking minds. II takes what everyone loved about phuture dooms first album and ramps it up to 10, making the darkest and angriest and grittiest black acid cult shit imaginable. one song after the other, each proceeding to just impress and enthrall me more and more, and then you get the 4 minute ambient (and frankly kinda scary) ending, and honestly i needed to lay down after hearing II for the first time. the story and mystery of phuture doom deepens further, and quite frankly i worship  my new overlord Entity0, whatever the fuck that even is

honourable mentions time ! ! ! !

Death Peak by Clark; wow ! new clark album ! fuck its cool as hell ! god damn ive listened to this album too much ! !

Humanz by Gorillaz; yeah so what if you dont think its their best album ! its still a damn good album !

Utopia by Bjork; UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU WHAT A BEAUTIFUL ALBUM

Human Goings by Neil Bones; FUCK ME EVEN NEIL BONES RELEASED A NEW ALBUM ITS ALL HAPPENING THIS YEAR AAAAAAAA

Rainbow Mirror by Prurient; hey what the fuck new prurient ? Oh Hey Its Three Hours Long. combines his work under vatican shadow and prurient really well ! ! ! !

The Journey Man by Goldie; what the fuck goldie released a new album and its actually GOOD ? ? ? oh it goes for 2 hours huh. Fuckin Okay Mate

Evolution Of The Universe by Medium; my god what a fucking intense and angry dnb album good shit

WELL I GUESS THATS ALL FOLKS ! ! ! ! ! ! ! yeehaw and have a Happy New Cheers