#theres a full song of kitty on the roof | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

otterplusharchive · 6 years ago

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oooo 🐰💕🍼🌸💖🍂🌧️🎶💘🕊️🍓⛅💗? Sorry if that's a lot! Feel free to skip any u don't wanna answer

dont worry its ok!!! thank u so much for sending me all of these im gonna pht them under a readmore but ill answer them all!!

do u believe in soul matesyes!!! i do!!! i think that theres souls our own soul has met before and that were drawn to them and meant to encounter them in our lives and that theyll always be significant to us in our lives..

are you crushing on someone

whats your favorite memory

ohh two of my fave memories are of the times ive been lucky enough to visit my dear friends who live further away in america.. like when i visited owen when we were maybe 14 and we sat on this little part of his houses roof that u could get to from his bedroom window and watched a meteor shower.. and when i visited seamus last summer and he took me to the ocean for the first time and we fed a seagul fries and then we trespassed in a private camping ground to sit on rocks and stick our feet in a really pretty secluded river.. visiting my friends are the memories i have thatre most filled with love and joy for me..whats your favorite flower

peonies!!!! i love them so much also sunflowers i really love all kinds of flowershave you ever been in loveyes..... im really full of a lot of love always tbh... love is everywhere and in everything and its so important

whats your middle nameclaire!! my birthname and middle name together mean clear light

whats your favorite thing to do on rainy days

walk thru puddles!! or watch the droplets race!!favorite song right now

hazy shade of winter by gerard way3 ways to win my heart

u mm. i dont know tbh uhh. remember small things abt me or small things that i like? show that u care about me and uh. send me pictjres of otters3 habits you have

kissing all my cats goodnight and goodmorning... saying hi to crows i see.. meowing to the tune of songsone secret you have

i like 2 eat huge amounts of olives espexially when im stressedwhats your morning routine

iT DEPENDS i need to get a better routine and ive been meaning to today i woke up around 6 for my early math class dressed pretty quickly ate a banana sat with my kitty willie for a while then had to leavewho do you miss

friends in far away places who i cant see.... but who are always w me in heart...

thank u so much!!

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entropysyarn · 6 years ago

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Sleepless and lonely.

Late nights, early mornings, and an inability to fsking sleep. I got some new yarns recently. Lots of soft, fluffy delicate textures I'm looking forward to rolling, similar colours, and multiples of the same colours. Tentative weekend plans! I'm laying in bed, staring at my ceiling, phone, and hands, admiring one thumb, because, frankly, its the nicest nail I've ever had, professional manicures notwithstanding, and I just... I'm still so tired. I'm trying to make it all work. Bills, pets, hobbies, sleep, work, friends, relationship, and I feel like all the balls ive got floating around are all gonna sink, or float away because I'm just barely treading water. Someone told me today, that what I'm feeling, and how I'm feeling are legitimate, and that its ok to feel the way I do. They didnt push the way i felt aside, or minimise it, though, they were relentlessly positive. I'm still moving forward, even if I perceive myself to be weighted down by all the things I think are failures, and thats ok too. At least I tried. They were proud of me for even looking for a second job, much less applying for one. But, I kind of feel like I shouldn't need a second job, that I should have chosen better with the first job I've had here. Ive worked for almost a full year, come September, and, I'm still down to about 1.85$usd before every paycheck comes. I save, clearly, because emergencies sneak up on you and blindside you on a Tuesday out of the blue, but... It still doesn't feel like its enough. I'm worried, because I'm going to miss out on a lot of my sons life, just trying to keep a roof overhead.

I worry a lot about my cats. One keeps trying to eat plastic, and coughing when he does get into the trash, im scared my lil black melon cat is going to resent me bc I keep shutting her out of the bathroom when I go, and I'm not home enough to play, and i dont have the energy to play, properly, with any of them, and my other cat barely comes out of the closet to get petted, and im worried shes not getting enough food bc of the fat garbage kitty who likes to eat plastic. Theyre not shedding much, but, it may be bc I brushed them 2 days ago. I want to get them a new water fountain and a new tower, maybe another lil hidey spot I can put in the closet for my hide-a-cat. None of these cats will lay and just snuggle with me like I want. Just another reminder, I guess, that if I had the ability to share immortality with anyone, I would have shared it with my previous cat. You know, getting another pet, was sold to me as a sort of cure for the loss of a pet, but, I dont think ive really processed his loss yet. I spent, like half my current life with him, and he was my best friend, and most treasured person, and I miss him, every day. Maybe i just need to set down, with some tea, a box of good tissues, and a soft blanket and a nicer pillow, and just have a good cry and let it all out. God theres so much to let out tho.

Id much rather sleep than cry. At least when im asleep, sometimes I have interesting dreams. Most of those dreams make me wildly unhappy when I wake up, because I think, my brain is trying to create a feeling I dont really get when I'm awake, but when I'm asleep, I'm happy. Like, peacefully, warmly content. I smile more in my dreams than I do while awake. I dont know how I'm going to fit sleep in if I get a second job. Thats honestly like, top 3 concerns. My kid, sleep, and, would be able to keep that job long enough to make it out of grunt/drone status? I dont like feeling like I'm not good enough at my job that id get fired at any minute. 90% of the jobs I can get are at will employment. Meaning they dont need a reason, not really, to fire me. I'm scared my managers think I'm annoying, because the big manager, seems to be frustrated with me a lot, and i cant figute out if its because I'm obnoxious, or its because I cant live up to the impossible standards corporate sets, even though I'm literally running through the store like my ass is on fire, taking care of a half dozen things, all at once. I want to do a good job, at my job, because, I honestly like what I do. Its interesting, just enough variety I'm not likely to be truly bored, and just enough stability that if i wanted, I could literally work in the same store, doing the same thing, for the next decade. But, I dont want to do the exact same thing for the foreseeable future. I mean, yeah I don't wanna quit, and id like to move up to management, but, yet again, feeling like a failure creeps in, and smacks me upside the head and yells "if you cant do this, what the shit makes you thing you could do management???" Several people tho, at work, have told me, they would like me to be management, because they think id be good at it. I might. I can handle a lotta shit, all at once, ive had to figure out how to manage 15 things at the same time because, wouldnt you know it, thats how my brain operates. Still cant find the tab with the music on though, id really like to change the song.

Wow, ive been typing for a solid half hour. I think, thats enough word vomit into the void. I'm kind of tired after all that. No resolution yet, because, you cant really resolve anything at like 3 am. But, I will take my friends suggestion, and keep going, making note of where ive been, and trying, really, really hard to keep where id like to be, in mind.

#tldr #tldr i know #word vomit #insomnia #writing #journal #journey #late night writing #late night #night time thoughts #thoughts #feelings #depression #depression journey #struggle #mental health #mental disorder #internal screaming

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