#therefore knowing that he can trust aguni not to stab himself because no rational person eats a corndog like that | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

aceofspadegrass · 2 years ago

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So you know how people make corndogs?

Imagine, okay. Takeru's monologuing to Aguni about something, perhaps a new fabric he's gotten. Maybe about some new restaurant that's opened up that makes really good apple based treats. Or just talking about how it's a shame that they passed by that dead fish that was run over by a bike, although neither can explain why exactly a fish got run over in the first place.

Then, as any normal citizen does, they get robbed. Well, that's a lie, kind of. Really, people broke in with the intent to rob the place, but it's kind of occupied by a pair of dudes. Well maybe they knew that it wasn't empty, because they have weapons on them. Nothing serious, like guns, just knives, bolt cutters, things that would make robbing easier in the off chance something is locked away.

Aguni isn't having it, obviously. Tries to subdue them, but it's one against a group of them. As much as Aguni wants, he can't fight them all off in the current state he's in. Maybe he sprained an ankle, or is coming down with a cold and can't realistically do anything except maybe spread a cold around (Which is ineffective as a quick solution).

Takeru talks them down, somehow. Charisma off the charts convinces them to stay for corndogs, because he's already in the middle of making some and it would be quite rude if they interrupted him. Don't they respect the sanctity of preparing food from scratch? Principle of the matter.

Anyways, it works (Somehow.) and Takeru continues on making corndogs. He's efficient in it too, talks the entire time. Distracts them from actually robbing the place, because hell is he not good at generating attention.

They get their corndogs. They look delicious. Fresh from the fryer, glistening hot.

Now, I don't know if you know, but when you eat a corndog, typically there's one of two ways. You bite from the top and go down, or you attack it like a corn cob from the side (Although why you would is beyond me. Wouldn't that just fall?) And usually, unless you take shitty bites, you go for it, you know?

Neither really protects you when a man uses knives in place of skewers.

#aib #alice in borderland #hatter #takeru danma #aguni morizono #now logistically this can't kill you but being stabbed in the mouth in my opinion doesn't sound particularly like a good friday night #plus these aren't JUST knives. These are knives that are inside a freshly baked corndog #and if I'm correct I'm pretty sure metal is a conductor of heat #so not only is your mouth likely stabbed but it's gonna burn #unless you sir/ma'am are a master of consuming hot metal then you're burning that flesh maw #now you may be wondering: how did they NOT realize that Hey These Skewers Don't Feel Right #takeru is a man of the dramatics and therefore would likely have oddly shaped knives #alternatively takeru was bored and instead of making hats figured out the art of Really Shitty Shivs #aguni as his best friend simply did not question it/did not know takeru up and weaponised the sticks #aguni also knew that takeru would never intentionally hurt him so yeah he was surprised when people got stabbed #his skewer is normal obviously #alternatively again takeru knows aguni is the type to eat his REALLY weird #in a way that aguni's mouth never touches the stick #therefore knowing that he can trust aguni not to stab himself because no rational person eats a corndog like that #granted aguni likely stops eating his at all when the robbers he's forced to share the table with startle in pain #or aguni doesn't touch his period because when he picked up a corndog it was just... off to him #takeru trusts aguni so deeply that he's willing to serve him weaponized corndogs

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