#therefore ‘the guy i’m about to marry’ is also an inside joke

[incorrect-league-of-villains]

Dabi: The man I'm about to marry showed me this pebble that looks like a guitar pick and with an entirely straight face said "it's for rock music".

Fuyumi: Marry him faster.

[whore4teamcap]

Partners Against Crime

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Gender Neutral Reader

Summary: After your boyfriend takes a promotion, you’re assigned a new partner. How will you both deal with the separation and potential of someone getting in the way? 

Warnings: This fanfiction does revolve around law enforcement but I will not include any controversies. 

Word Count: 2.4k

A/N: Thank you @stucky-my-ship for requesting this! I’m so excited to turn this into a series. Hope you enjoy <3 Thank you so much to those who read! Feedback and interactions are heavily appreciated. Also! Please reach out if you would like to be tagged in future parts and my other projects.

Part 1

You flickered your eyes open as a blaring noise came from beside you. No matter how many years of experience you had with this job, you swore you would never get used to this schedule. Even when you were starting out as a beat cop everything seemed easier. It was probably just the adrenaline from coming straight out of the academy but then your life changed. You were promoted from beat and finally landed your goal job as a detective. You dreamed of being a detective ever since you were little. You smiled softly at the memory of you sneaking downstairs to watch tv behind your parents backs. Often finding yourself glued to crime shows; they fueled your desires to take down criminals.

You throw your arm toward the side table and shut off the alarm. Then you proceed to roll over and frown at the empty bed space beside you. Your boyfriend, James Barnes, well you called him Bucky, just got promoted to Sergeant. He was officially in charge of the precinct you both worked at. Which was both a blessing and a curse. You were so proud of Bucky, he finally got the promotion he has been working his ass off for and the new job came with a lot of good things for him.

But, you couldn't hide the fact that it was gonna severely weigh on you. You and Buck had been partners since you first got promoted to detective. You both really clicked from that day forward. It was gonna take a lot to get used to not having him by your side. In this line of work you need a person you can trust one thousand percent. At the end of the day this person is in charge of your life and you're in charge of theirs. Bucky was the definition of what a partner meant to you. Which is why it was no shock that three years later you both shared an apartment and ended up falling in love. However you just knew the promotion would put a damper on that as well. You had to keep your affair hidden from the precinct and trusted very few people. When you moved in with Bucky, you weren't even allowed to update your address so every now and then you'd make your way over to your old place to pick up mail. Luckily, you hit it off with your old landlord and he helps with anything and everything you need. Although you were certain he did it to eventually get a legal favor. But you didn't mind. It bought you time with the man you love.

Being that the precinct didn't know about you and Bucky, you couldn't stop yourself from worrying about the future. He was no longer your equal. He was your boss and you were terrified of the thought of someone finding out about your relationship. It could get both of you fired or moved to different precincts. Which was the better of the two, but it would be hard to work without each other. You strongly believed what made you best at your job was having him beside you. Or at least in the same work place. This mindset also made you question if your relationship would ever progress more than it was. Of course you wanted to eventually marry Bucky but how would that work with your jobs? There were so many obstacles the two of you faced and it made you even more stressed for your first day without him.

While groaning, you rub your face. Then you gain the strength to pull yourself from the half empty bed. You make your way to the bathroom and turn on the water. Giving it time to heat up while you go grab a towel and pick out clothes for your day. After showering and getting ready, you stepped out of your shared room. The apartment is small and cozy. New York was an expensive city to live in but you both made it work. When you were looking for apartments, you didn't care where you ended up just as long as we were with each other. Being that the apartment was tiny, you could see straight into the kitchen from the hallway. Your eyes fell straight on a note besides the partially full coffee pot. You smile to yourself and walk over. You lift it off the counter and begin to read,

Good morning Doll

I hope you slept well. I left early this morning to get a head start on everything at the station. I made us coffee. I hope it's still good by the time you wake up.

Yours,

Bucky

P.S. Please grab our usual at the deli before you come in

You let out a brief chuckle at the final sentence written on the piece of paper. You grab a travel mug from the cabinet and place it in front of you. Then you proceed to grab the pot and pour it into the cup. After adding creamer and sugar, you bring the cup to your lips and take a small sip. The coffee was good but on the colder side. Therefore you pop it in the microwave while you quickly grab your belongings. When you hear the beep, you remove it and put the lid on. Carrying everything with you out of the door.

While driving to work, you swing by the deli up the road from your apartment building. You park on the busy New York street and quickly get out of your car and run inside. The bell above the door dings and Frank and Linda look up from behind the counter. You shoot them a large smile and they quickly return. The deli was owned by this sweet older couple since the early 70s. They were so kind to you and really cared for their regulars. So much so, they memorized Bucky and your order. Sometimes even having it ready before you arrive in the mornings.

"Good morning (y/n)! Where's Bucky?" Frank asks, his welcoming smile fading into a light frown. He walks toward the edge of the counter to meet you.

"Good morning! He went in early. First day of the new promotion. I'm still gonna bring him breakfast though," you explained while Linda grabbed a brown paper bag from the far counter and brought it toward you.

"Oh! Please tell him we wish him well, would you? We remember like it was yesterday when you both started coming in here. You've come a very long way and were so proud of you both," Linda said kindly. Her words turn your cheeks a dark shade of pink.

You could remember that day like it was yesterday as well. Bucky brought you here on your first day of the job and you've been coming to Frank's since.

-

"Why don't we stop and get food before we start our case? I know this amazing deli a few blocks away from the station," Detective Barnes suggests and you nod.

His gaze stays on you while you both get into his car. You slide into the passenger seat then proceed to put your seat belt on. You watch him do the same then start the car.

"So how long have you been a detective?" you ask softly, fiddling with your notebook and pen in your lap.

"Bout' 5 years or so. Rogers, the guy you met back at the precinct, he was my partner. We go way back," He replies while he pulls out of his parking spot. Beginning to make his way up the block.

You watched the busy street and took everything in with new eyes. You lived in New York your whole life but the city was still new to you. Your gaze shifts to your partner and you blushed lightly. His dark hair, calming smile and kind personality seemed to draw you in. But you pushed those thoughts away. This was professional and you knew that. However you found yourself incredibly lucky to be partnered with someone who already gave you such a welcoming homely feeling.

"Whatcha thinking about, (y/l/n)?" he asks. Shifting his attention from the road to you. His eyes connected with yours and suddenly all of your first day jitters went away.

His eye snapped back to the road and he began puling to a stop. Veering off to the right side of the road into an empty parking spot. Once his eyes snapped away, you took a deep breath and looked away as well.

"Just trying to get a good read on my partner. Making sure he's not dirty or part of something that'll get me killed," you say jokingly. You let out a laugh at your own stupid explanation and Barnes' attention quickly turned back to you. The corners of his mouth instantly went up and he shot you a toothy grin.

"Don't worry. If you're with me long enough. I'd let you in on my dirty cop side. No need to fear for your life," He joked back. Holding up his hands as if he were surrendering.

"All about the money in the end, isn't it Barnes?" You asked, continuing this forming inside joke.

"Oh definitely."

You both get out of the vehicle and you notice a big sign above the small deli. The name reading FRANK'S. You both walk inside and you smile as you're greeted by a seemingly older couple. You have been to countless deli's in New York State but this one gave you a great feeling. You didn't have family in the city. So it amazed you how quickly strangers could become such a crucial piece in your life.

-

She hands the order to you and you begin to pull out your wallet. Frank instantly puts his hand up and smiles, "Please it's on the house today. Also don't forget your coffee! Feel free to grab one for Bucky too."

"Thank you so much," was all you managed to reply with. Their utter kindness always brought so much love to your heart.

You notice you forgot the mugs so you walk out of the shop toward your car. You unlock it and pull on the passenger side door. You put the food in your car. Then lean over and grab your nearly empty travel mug from home and the spare from your car. You bring them inside so you can quickly fill them up before making a b line to work.

When you arrive, you walked into the precinct with your hands full. Doing your best to carefully get to your desk. You notice Bucky making himself at home in his new office and you can't help but feel an overwhelming amount of happiness for your boyfriend. He looks so excited and you were so incredibly proud of him. You set your coffee down then pull out your breakfast sandwich placing it on your desk. You grab the brown bag and Bucky's coffee wasting no time before you walk into his office. The man instantly looks up from his papers with a smile.

"Good morning beautiful. Is that for me?" He asks softly, keeping his voice low enough so no one hears.

"Good morning Sergeant Barnes," you say with a small smirk growing on your lips. You move closer to the desk and set everything down. "Linda and Frank gave us our food for free today. They wanted to congratulate you on the promotion. They're very proud of you."

"That's very kind of them. I needed this. Thanks for picking up the food. Rogers told me to come in early and I'm kinda glad I did because he was able to give me the full run down. Hopefully everything goes smoothly from here on out. Although it was weird coming in alone. I hope that won't become a regular thing. Despite the headache, I love our chaotic mornings," Bucky explains followed by a small chuckle. Your mind instantly recalls how usually your mornings consisted of you both fighting for space to get ready. Except you also both secretly adored the morning due to the fact Bucky loves to wake you up with light kisses.

"I agree. I really hope it's not regular. I already lost my partner, the last thing I want to lose is alone time with my boyfriend," you sigh then force a slight laugh. You didn't mean for it to come off in an upsetting way, but you realized it did when the room fell silent.

"Is my new partner coming in today?" You ask curiously, unable to find anything but awkwardness after your statement. You pay close attention to his face and notice a sour look appear. Maybe he wasn't taking it as well as you thought.

"Yeah. He should be in soon," Bucky replies and you nod. You walk out of his office and make your way to your own desk.

You unwrap your sandwich and use one hand to eat and the other to flip through your files. Taking in all of the new information for the case you are starting. You quickly finish your food then you take a large sip of your coffee. You haven't been given any information on your new partner so you wanted to make sure you knew as much as you could about your mutual assignment. Just in case you were stuck with someone inexperienced.

After about a half hour of being lost in thought while analyzing your papers, Bucky's strong voice fills the room. You look up and catch his gaze. He motions for you to come toward him; you get up from your chair and follow behind him into his office. Inside you see a man sitting in one of the two chairs across from Bucky's. He had on black dress pants, a light blue button up shirt and a black blazer. The outfit complimented his body quite well. Your focus moves up to his face, noticing his piercing blue eyes and his slightly long blonde hair. You hear a fake cough come from Bucky and instantly look at him.

"Detective (y/l/n), this is your new partner. You guys will be working the Reagan case together."

The man stands up from his chair and eyes you up and down. He finally extends his hand to you and you shake it.

"Hi, I'm Detective John Walker."

[fa-by]

Hi Faby I have a question L said that she knew she was queer when she fell in love with her best friend when she was 15 and that her and L started to have a physical connection when she was 15 and I know everyone says that she was talking about C because L met C for the first time when she was still 15 but to me that doesn't make sense because L and C only started to get closer after L turned 16 and her and C basically just met so how could she be talking about C?

Hi to you, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 I know it doesn’t seem to make sense because the narrative’s goal is to confuse you and get you on their side by making you abandon the ship. You have to pay attention to the details and what they say because there are always flaws in the stories that our Camren are forced to tell. But don’t worry, I’m here. I’ve already talked about it many times, but I’ll explain it again to make you understand better and answer your ask at the same time.

So. During Becky G’s ‘En La Sala’ podcast (October 28, 2020), Lauren said she realized she was queer because she fell in love with her best friend when she was 15 and they started having a physical relationship. She forced herself to think that kissing and sleeping with her friend every once in a while was just a funny thing and nothing important; something that she has ‘normalized’ in her head by justifying it as something that ‘straight girls do’, and therefore fueling her internalized homophobia. Personally speaking, I believe in this. Not in the ‘she fell in love’ part because Laur’s still forced to say that the only girl she has ever loved is Lucy, but I believe Lauren and Lucy really did everything L said. Lucy was the first real unlock thanks to which Laur experienced the attraction and the feelings towards the girls she’d always felt and hidden deep inside herself. I firmly believe that Lucy was the first girl among her crushes on girls Laur acted on, and with whom she experimented in secret given the environment in which they both grew up and which still surrounded them at the time.

Now, the time frame in which this experimentation happened. Paul Martinez, the one she believed was her first love and whom she believed she would marry, broke up with her in late July 2011, and she only managed to move on when she wrote a song about how she felt on September 17th of that same year. Lucy moved back to Puerto Rico in February 2012, returning to visit Miami occasionally (that’s why the fetus pictures with Lucy and Camren at Laur’s house). Therefore, the time frame in which that experimentation happened, is from the end of September 2011 to February 2012. It could’ve happened in all those four months, or only in two, or only in one. Who knows. But that’s the time frame. Time frame during which Laur was 15 years old.

Having explained this, let’s move on. Camren first met during the first phase of the audition, the ‘cattle call’, on May 1, 2012, in Greensboro, North Carolina. You know? Where that short and really cute conversation started by Mila happened: “Hi, I like your shirt”, “Thanks. I like your jacket”. But it ended up there because they didn’t become friends from that day. They didn’t exchange phone numbers and they therefore didn’t even spend time together at home in Miami. They were still just two strangers who had auditioned for a TV show to pursue their dreams like so many other people. Oh and, on May 1, 2012, Laur was still 15, and Mila had turned since almost two months; therefore they were both 15 years old. The moment they became friends by no longer detaching one from the hip of the other, was two months later, on July 25 in Miami, when they met for the first time for the first day of boot camp (L went to C: “You’re the Cuban girl!”). On July 25, 2012, Lauren had by then turned 16 for nearly a month, and Camila was still 15.

Now let’s move on to the biggest miscalculated mistake that, either they made her say, or Laur herself said; perhaps even deliberately and not by mistake. On June 26, 2020, and therefore before the podcast with Becky, the PAPER Magazine article was released. In that article, Lauren explained, along with other things, that she’d been in love with her best friend for seven years. But the calculations don’t add up, for two things to be exact.

First thing: The Laucy narrative includes that A) Laur fell in love with her sure, Jan at 15 when they kissed and hooked up during parties.

P.S. Is it just me, or does this smell like what actually started happening to Camren the following year? I mean, the Like Friends Do situation whereby Laur got out of her internalized homophobia and realized she loved her and then got her head out of her ass by finally going to get her girl? No? Just me?

B) The wanting but not being able to be with her and giving her what she wanted made them grew apart not by her choice and not because Lucy returned to live in Puerto Rico and they simply grew apart for the distance and Lauren’s busy schedule with 5H, no, no.

P.S. I don’t know about you, but this still smells like Camren’s story to me.

C) Lucy returned to her life after she had a car accident on May 17, 2015:

“She came back into my life when I was 18. I was on tour and I was in my room in a hotel somewhere and she called me”. From that moment on, Lauren decided they would’ve been together “all in” and “now we’re gonna be in this relationship”. Yeah, sure. No contract that was supposed to help both of them involved here. No, no.

D) They broke up because Laur confirmed that theirs was a very toxic relationship, and the specific reason she gave was because they both weren’t fully healed from the past yet, but that they still loved each other very much. Mmmh-hmm, okay 🥱😴 Yeah, no, yeah, sorry. I fell asleep as a result of hearing bullshit.

Second thing: Ty.

Shall we reveal the miscalculation (again)? In love with her at 15, got together with her at 18 and broke up at 20 (1 year and 8 months, from mid-May 2015 to mid-January 2017), and after less than a month, start of another PR dating Ty. Now, 20 minus 15 (Laur’s two ages from the beginning to the end of the ‘story’), how much is it? 5. Shall we calculate from the moment of Laucy experiment to when they ‘broke up’? From late September 2011 to mid January 2017, how many years are? 5! 5 years and four months to be exact. According to the logic of the narrative, if she was oh so in love with Ty as they made her proclaim every two seconds, it means that she’d stopped loving Lucy that same year, and it’s not 7 years anyway! It’s still 5! Do we want to try with two last calculations? Okay. Also because you may have wondered: “Faby, what if we instead calculated from when ‘they got together’ to the release of that PAPER Magazine article?”. I’d answer that it’s still 5 years. From mid-May 2015 to June 25, 2020, it’s 5 years and 1 month to be exact. “Faby, what if we tried to calculate from the beginning to the publication of the article?” From the end of September 2011 (beginning of the time frame of the Laucy experimentation) to the publication of the article on 25 June 2020, it’s 8 years and 9 months to be precise. Not even in this case it’s 7! So, as you can see… And at this point I wonder: is there an alternate world where math calculations lead to 7 and not 5 here? What was that? Why say 7? Well.. I actually know why.

Shall we play another little math game? Can I reveal the truth in the lie? Let’s try to make sense of this 7 together now.

Lauren explained that she’d been in love with her best friend for 7 years in that interview, right? The interview with PAPER Magazine came out on June 26, 2020, but was done before the date it was released. We all know Laur was born on the 27th, and therefore in both cases, Laur was 23. And tell me, dear, how much is 23 minus 7? Sorry, I can’t hear your answer. A little louder please? Got it, got it. Can I also write it for everyone else who’s reading? Okay, thanks: 16. Wait, 16??? So who was Lauren actually talking about? Ohhh. How foolish of me. That’s why it ‘smelled like what actually started happening to Camren the following year’ to me. Because Laur was talking about Camila all along 🤦🏻‍♀️

🤣😏😎

Sarcasm and jokes aside, do you see how easy it is to manipulate and confuse people's ideas? It's still 7 years if we calculate from mid-January 2013 (after the first real New Year's kiss and the signing of the contracts with Syco/Epic) to the release of that PAPER Magazine article on June 25, 2020. And it's still 7 years even if we calculate from July 25, 2012 (first day of boot camp) to June 25, 2020. Camila is the answer to the 7 years because even if they try to make Laur modify the narrative by making her change the names with the PRs' ones, she's always talking about Mila anyway in reality.

Does it make more sense now, dear? I hope I’ve taken away all your doubts 🥰 Stay safe and have a good day 🤗 You guys too ❤

[geminihalos]

Astro Analysis pt.2

Back at it again with a different family member’s chart, but this time it was upon request. I promise that I will start posting about famous ppls charts and why they are like the way they are. If yall want a specific famous person’s chart analysis then please take your time to comment on this post by putting a name in there.

Alright so the family member that i’m putting on the spot today is my own father.I ask for my family’s permission before posting anything relating to such matters.

I’m going to be quoting him a lot lmao bc its too iconic to leave out.

☀️Sun in Leo + Sun in the 10th house: Is in general very Confident and loud. Sometimes has no filter and is a huge lover of art, especially cooking. He expresses himself fully through his career which is also MC in Leo, meaning he is meant to be a leader. There is a sense of enjoyment in being generous and having a reliable reputation. Has a big heart, but won’t hesitate to cut away the unnecessary. Tiny bit of spoiled brat energy, but won’t admit it.

☀️ Ya’ll ever notice that Leo placements also love video games, and are very good at it. Ex: my own father, my cap brother with the leo rising, my aries archnemesis with a leo moon. All of ‘em love playing video games and spend hours grinding on getting the xp and the dubs.

☀️ Scorpio moon + moon in the 12th house: this placement is what makes him the easiest to talk to in my opinion because he understands the emotions and wisely handles them because this placement if highly developed. Scorp moons claim they don’t cry often, and he himself believes that crying is useless and he’d rather think about what to do next instead of moping around. Vague descriptions of how he feels, and enjoys deep convos.

☀️The 12th house is linked to the past life, the secrets, and subconscious, which means that he hides his emotions fairly well, and they’re well controlled with scorpio in there. Is aware of what’s going on inside his emotional nature. Reflective when developed and he has an innate desire to reach enlightenment. makes sense bc 12th house is linked to spirituality. Fuels the generosity and calms the ego.

☀️Mercury in Leo + Mercury in the 9th: once again very loud, but loves jokes and is very comedic. Satire humor because of scorpio influence. Naturally charismatic voice, knows how to command people in a socially acceptable way, and always has a tendency to talk over people to get his point across first. Strong in his beliefs and points especially bc mercury is in the 9th.

☀️ Mercury in the 9th makes him direct his logic to the way of life and helps him find ways to set his morals geared towards finding emotional freedom. See how this connects with scorpio moon in the 12th? Often talks about the philosophy of life and is bent on finding as much knowledge as possible, a natural scholar of life. Fun, loud, and confident. (his life path is 7: the investigator and knowledge seeker path)

☀️ Venus in virgo + venus in the11th: makes for a witty person and it's true that people with this placement prefer modest, savvy, clean, and sophisticated people. That’s why he married my mother (a capricorn in the VIRGO decan). Is conversational and loves to share knowledge (”useful and life-changing knowledge” as he puts it) when he’s bring social. 

☀️Venus in the 11th makes him loved by society, and once again can attract people’s attention. People find him generous, thoughtful, and quirky, which are the classic Virgo traits being expressed through Venus. Although his angsty Scorpio moon makes him preach introversion, he can talk to people just fluidly, and they like him.

☀️ Mars in Cancer + Mars in the 8th: Is passive aggressive and hard to anger for real, but once someone does trigger him, he gets explosive with his words and saying hurtful things in the moment. Once again like my cap brother but more heated. Actually good at tennis; ppl with mars in cancer are good at tennis like Roger Federer, Novak Djokovic, and Refael Nadal. 

☀️Likes to make people rage quit for the fun of it when playing competitively. “we have to make sure he doesn’t know we’re pros” he said, “why” I said, “because I want to destroy him and make him think he has another chance of beating me... just for me to destroy him bahahahah” (applies to video games and tennis)

☀️ The 8th house rules the secrets, the hidden, and also financial deals/transformations. What this means is that he directs his energy towards taking calculated risks when it comes to material wealth instead of managing/keeping it which is 2nd house specialty. Does stock market investing and claims that investing came natural to him (”it was in my blood” lmao). Lowkey Scary because his financial strategies are risky, but it takes strong guts to execute. 

☀️ASC in Scorpio with Uranus in the 1st: Lots of confidence here guys. Uranus rules Aquarius whose sign is opposite to leo. Therefore, he appears like he has a god complex since aquariuses can be louder and more narcissistic than even Leo. But then again, he has leo placements... oof. He comes across as someone quiet, strategic, and intimidating, but he has a distant and aloof look as well.  

☀️MC in Leo: Born to lead and forge his own path. He was given so much leeway and freedom to innovate and find his own way, that he matured very quickly without the help of his parent (aquarius in the 4th). The leader who shines, but with the scorp energy, he prefers to be more secretive and work behind the scenes.

☀️Fixed Dominant: “i’m so adAPtaBle what are you tAlKinG about” *proceeds to argue with my brother about why going this road is faster than the other even though he’s clearly wrong*

☀️He looks up to feminine sun signs a lot bc of his virgo venus and scorp moon: ex- Warren buffet (virgo), Bill gates (scorpio), John D Rockefeller (cancer). 

[cacoetheswriting]

lonely this christmas

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Warnings: mild mild cursing, mainly just fluff !!! Word Count: 2.9k Summary: Reader admits to Spencer she will be spending the holidays alone but he’s got other plans.

A/N: starting off the month of december with a christmas centred fic!! hope you like it <3

-

Being alone on Christmas wasn’t unfamiliar to Spencer. In fact it was pretty much the opposite. Being alone on Christmas was typical, ordinary. 

The nature of his job being what it was, he usually ended up working over the holidays anyway. Therefore he never made any plans with his mom because most times he just ended up disappointing her. Being alone at Christmas was fine. Being a disappointment however, completely different story.

As years went by Diana stopped noticing his absence. Of course if Spencer was to visit her at the sanitarium over Christmas she would welcome him with open arms, but he never does. He used to feel incredibly guilty about it, but that too passed with time. 

There was no indication that this year would be any different so he kept his schedule clear. However, the twenty-fifth of December approached fast. Very fast. The closer it got the more it was shaping to be the first holiday season, in a long time, the team would get to spend with their families. And even Spencer found himself considering going home to Nevada; seeing his mom. 

A tab of the airline website was constantly open on his desktop. He checked it regularly; hovering over the option to buy a ticket. 

That’s how you caught him one day. 

You observed from your own desk as Spencer leaned back in his chair, one hand still holding the mouse. The wheels inside his brain clearly turning; evaluating all of the options and possible outcomes.

“Hey, doctor.” You called out grabbing his attention. “If you spend any more time thinking about whether you should go home for Christmas, all the good seats will be gone.” 

He chuckled. “I guess you’re right.” “As always.” You shot him a playful wink as he turned to once again look at his screen. 

“There. Bought.” Spencer exclaimed after a brief moment of silence. “My mom will be happy.” “When was the last time you seen her?” You asked curiously. “It has been more than six months at this stage.” He answered while standing up. 

“Coffee?” He gestured to the empty mug on your desk. You nodded. “You read my mind.” 

The two of you walked towards the kitchenette in the office. It was quite late on a Friday night meaning everyone had cleared out for the weekend. Only the usual suspects remained; Spencer and you.

“When was the last time you were home for Christmas?” “Three years ago. How about you?” Spencer asked, tilting his head slightly to look at you. “Oh, I honestly don’t even remember.” You replied shrugging your shoulders.

“So your family must have been happy to hear you were getting the chance this year to spend the holidays with them.” The brunette doctor switched on the coffee machine and leaned against the wall while you elegantly hopped up onto the counter. 

“Actually, I didn't tell them.” 

Spencer furrowed his eyebrows. “How come?” 

He watched intently as you chewed on your bottom lip - a bad habit you failed miserably to break. In that second of silence you wondered whether you should tell him the truth. He was always so open with you, honest. It would only be fair to repay him with the same sincerity. So you took in a quick breath, and exhaled it quietly before looking up to meet his amiable gaze. 

“My mom and I got into this huge fight a couple of weeks ago. She tried to set me up with this guy because in her eyes it’s unacceptable that I’m single. She doesn't think it’s right that my younger sister is getting married next summer and I haven't had one relationship in my life that lasted longer than a month.” A soft sigh escaped you. “I told her to butt out, using much harsher language than that of course.” Your mouth twirled into a smile; trying to make light of this conversation. Being no stranger to your frequent use of profanity Spencer smirked. 

“We haven't spoken since. She hasn't formally invited me over for the holidays which she always does, even if she knows I won’t be able to make it, and whenever I bring it up with my dad or my siblings they change the topic so.” You shrugged once again while nervously dangling your legs. “It’s easier not to go.” 

Spencer nodded slowly, taking in all of the information you just unloaded. Shaking your head you reached over to grab the coffee pot and poured some into your mug. 

“I’m sorry doctor. I didn’t mean to just lay it all on you like that.” 

He stepped towards you. “Don’t be.” Holding his own cup in front of him, he smiled kindly. “Thank you for telling me.” You began to pour the black hot liquid into his mug; a slight shake to your hand. “Thank you for listening.” “Anytime.”

Spencer placed his full cup on the counter beside you and began to rummage through the cupboards in search for sugar. “Y/N I gotta ask, and obviously if you don't want to answer me you don't have to.” He cleared his throat as you took a sip of your bitter black coffee. “Why didn’t you want to go on a date with the man your mom suggested?” 

Once he successfully located the sugar, he straightened his shirt and plopped two cubes into the hot beverage. He offered you one but you shook your head, taking another sip. 

“I get that it’s not really my place but it just seems a small price to pay for being able to spend Christmas with your loved ones.” 

“If you must know doctor, I prefer to meet people through work. Prison systems and such.” You joked, a wide smile gracing your features. Spencer rolled his eyes. “And how is that going for you?” “Surprisingly well. I have a date shortly after we’re back from the Christmas break.” He arched his brow and smiled at you; playing along as you continued. “Solid guy. Only murdered five people.”

You beamed at the brunette doctor who was grinning back. “Maybe I should consider adding prisons to my dating pool.” You let out an over-exaggerated  gasp and placed your free hand over your chest. “Is doctor Spencer Reid really on the market?” 

Spencer shook his head. His light curls bouncing finely, matching his every move. He lowered his lips to the brim of his mug and took a sip of his coffee before focusing on you. “No, but for the right girl I’d consider it.” 

Without thinking you raised your free arm and adjusted his tie. Flattening down the edge of his collar, you could feel his eyes on you. Yet for some reason you were suddenly afraid to look up and meet his gaze. Strange. Or maybe not so strange.

“Lucky girl.” You said in a mere whisper. Letting your hand fall, you stepped off the counter with a light bounce. Spencer cleared his throat and the two of you walked back to your seats. 

The next few hours were spent working in silence. You tried to focus on the mountain of paperwork on your desk, yet instead found yourself glancing at the young doctor every other second - secretly hoping he would also be peeking up at you. And he was. Just not when you were looking at him.

“Y/N if you want you can come with me to Nevada, spend Christmas with me and my mom. ” Spencer proposed out of the blue. He got up out of his chair and grabbed his jacket, slowly putting it on. You smiled at him. “Thank you doctor but I will honestly be okay alone.” Pause. “Plus, I wouldn't want to interfere.” 

He was about to protest, say you wouldn't be interrupting, but he bit his tongue. He didn't want to seem pushy. “If you change your mind, let me know.” He reached for his bag and threw the strap over his head. “Just do it quickly or all the good seats will be gone.” He teased. You giggled. “I’ll be sure to keep that in mind. ” 

The brunette agent hesitated. He swayed on his heel for a moment before approaching your desk. “Can I give you a ride home?” He asked, eyes locking with yours. “There’s still a couple of things I want to get done but thank you for the kind offer.” Spencer nodded. A faint look of disappointment appeared on his face. “Goodnight Y/N.” “Goodnight doctor.” 

Christmas was upon you in the blink of an eye. On the last day before break the team exchanged Secret Santa presents before enjoying a pizza party. This year you had Penelope who squealed over her gift as everyone watched in amusement; you included. Resting against the wall, you observed as the blonde jumped around the room with joy. Her smile made you smile. 

“Good job on Penelope’s gift.” Spencer appeared beside you holding two plastic cups filled to the brim with eggnog. He handed you one before making himself comfortable next to you, his arm pressed gently to yours. “I don’t know what you're talking about doctor.” You responded, tilting your head slightly to look at him. 

“I like your Christmas sweater.” A small smile circled your lips as you reached out to flick the little bell sown onto the top of the Santas hat on his jumper. Spencer chuckled. “Thank you. You know, I really couldn't decide between this or the one with the Home Alone reference.” “Ah, the trusted Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animal sweater.” “That would be the one, yes.” The two of you beamed at each other. 

“I’m surprised you know what Home Alone is doctor.” You teased, nudging him playfully in the arm. Spencer laughed. “If I’m being honest, I was more intrigued by the booby traps than the plot of the movie.” He retorted as you sipped on the eggnog; slightly rolling your eyes at his response. “Of course you were. Don’t tell me you tested them out too?” 

He averted his gaze without responding, clearly a little embarrassed. “Well...” 

You couldn't help but giggle. Slowly, you leaned in towards him so that your lips were now at his ear. The brunette agent shivered as your hot breath hit his skin, however he didn't move away. 

“Don’t worry doctor, I did too.” You whispered. 

Instantly, he turned to look at you once again. His face was now inches away from yours, and as he stared oddly into your eyes the air caught in your throat. The two of you hovered right there for a moment, not moving and quite soundless, simply feeling each other's presence - as if there was no-one else in the room, no party. 

Eventually you broke the eye contact and took a step to your right, moving away from him. Suddenly feeling timid, you took another sip of your beverage while your free hand ran through your hair. Spencer also looked away. His mind racing a million miles per hour; he should have kissed you, right? No. Not in front of all these people, your colleagues. That would be bad. Unprofessional. Would you have even wanted him to kiss you? Did you like him like that? He hoped you did.

The party soon drew to a close. You were lost in conversation with Emily while Spencer was trying to teach Morgan and Rossi some card tricks. Your gaze kept averting in the direction of the young doctor every once in a while; Emily of course noticed. “Tell me again why you’re not going to Nevada with our resident genius?” A puzzled look now present on your face. “How did you-” 

“Reid told Morgan who told Garcia who told me.” She interrupted. You laughed at the ridiculousness of what she just came out of her mouth. “It’s like I’m in high school all over again.” She laughed under her breath.

There was a brief moment of silence.

“So, why aren’t you going?” Emily pried. A quiet sigh escaped your lips. “Like I told him, I don’t want to interfere.” She rolled her eyes; not buying into your bullshit. “He wouldn't have invited you-” “Fuck, please I don’t want-” She raised her hands in front of her. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry.” 

Glancing at the time, you excused yourself wishing Emily a wonderful and happy Christmas. Quickly and quietly, you headed to your desk and put on your winter coat. As you grabbed your handbag you turned to face the remaining partygoers: “Happy holidays everyone!”. Your eyes briefly locked with Spencers who shot you a shy smile as you mouthed ‘Merry Christmas doctor.’ before hurrying out the door. 

Two days later it was the twenty-fifth of December. You woke up on your couch, having fallen asleep during Christmas movie marathon, to the sound of your phone ringing. 

Yawning, you reached for the device. Spencer. Answering, you pressed it to your ear and croaked; “Hello.”. 

“I hope I didn't wake you.” “You did actually.” You responded yawning once again and gradually scrambling to your feet. You ambled towards the kitchen, straight for the coffee maker. “But I could never be mad at you doctor.” “I’m glad to hear that.” 

There was a short pause.

“How are you?” He asked, his voice kind. “I’m okay, no need to worry about me. Shit-” “Y/N?”

“Sorry. I just realised I’m out of coffee grounds.”

Spencer chuckled on the other line. “It’s not funny doctor. I’ve no coffee and everything is closed because it’s Christmas.” “You could always switch to tea for the day.” Rolling your eyes, you smirked. “Right, because I’m such an avid tea drinker.” 

There was another short pause.

“How was your flight? How’s Nevada? How’s your mom?” You asked changing the topic, making conversation. The young doctor didn't respond. “Hey, are you there?” The line cut-off. Weird.

‘He’ll call back later.’, you thought and headed for your bathroom.

An hour later you were showered and dressed. You switched on the lights on your poorly decorated Christmas tree and were about to make yourself comfortable on the sofa when a knock on the door caught your attention. You scurried over, without looking through the peephole to see who it was, you opened it.

“Spencer.” 

“Merry Christmas Y/N.” 

The brunette doctor smiled as you furrowed your brows. “What are you doing here? I thought you were in Nevada.”

“I was. I got back early this morning.” 

He waited for you to invite him in before shimmying passed. He set down two tote bags on the kitchen counter before turning to look at you once again. Lost for words, you locked the door and approached the young doctor. Slowly you peeked inside the bags. “Supplies.” He simply stated while taking off his coat. 

“You didn’t really think I’d let you spend Christmas alone, did you?” 

Your heart skipped a beat. “You didn't have to do this doctor.” “I know.” He shrugged before reaching into one of the bags and unpacking the items. “I wanted to.” He held up a bag of coffee grounds and you couldn't help but giggle delicately. 

“Thank you.” Your fingers brushed his as you grabbed the bag sending a shiver down your spine. Spencer froze feeling the sensation too. Nervously, he let his hand fall but the half-smile on his face remained. 

“Where did you get this stuff anyway?” You asked as you walked around to the coffee machine. “I packed what I had at home.” Nodding, you began to prepare two cups. As the appliance whirred, you turned in your spot. “What about your mom? Wouldn't she have wanted to spend Christmas Day with you?” 

Spencer continued to unpack the bags, neatly placing each item on the counter in front of him. “We spent all of yesterday together.” Pause. “And besides, she’s the one that urged me to come here.” He peered up at you, resting his palms down on the kitchen counter. The second his hazel eyes locked with yours, the flush of your cheeks turned a slender pink. 

Not really thinking you ushered back towards him. The brunette doctor watched you attentively. Gently, you placed one hand on top of his and gave it a tender squeeze. “Lucky me.” You whispered staring deep into his eyes. 

Spencers smile spread wider in unison with yours. After a few seconds of pure comfortable silence, he cleared his throat. “Do you think your prisoner boyfriend would mind if I asked you out on a date?” A faint giggle escaped your lips as the shade of your jowl turned from pink to bright red. “Even if he does-” You took another step towards Spencer, closing the space between you. “-I think you could handle him.” 

Spencer chuckled. Using his free hand, he placed a loose strand of your hair behind your ear. His thumb stroked your cheek in the process and you angled into his pleasant touch. 

“Thank you for being here.” You muttered, unintentionally chewing on your bottom lip. 

He cupped your face as his gaze moved briefly down to your mouth before once again locking with yours. “Thank you for having me.” His voice soothing, not quite matching the fervour in his eyes. 

In the space of a single heartbeat, he leaned down and his lips crushed against yours passionately. You let go of his hand and placed both your palms on his chest; tugging lightly at his shirt to try and pull him in even closer. Spencer did not waste a second, his now free arm moved elegantly around your waist.

The two of you pulled away breathlessly. He gently pressed his forehead to yours as you smiled. “Merry Christmas doctor.” “Merry Christmas Y/N.”

-

masterlist

[lovesanmotion]

ateez joining we got married

💌. This is: requested

Hongjoong: 

- He would be very excited about joining the revived program that all fans dread and love - Honestly he wanted to know who his paired partner is  - Because he wants to know what your favorites are - In short, he wants to get to know you - Upon the first meeting, expect a small bouquet of flowers from him - The conversation is never boring as Joong would always ask a lot of questions  - That you feel like you’re in a hot seat  - Admiring his lyric composing and him letting you listen to the mixes that he does  - And you being the first person he ever lets in inside his studio - Towards the end of the program, he would compose a song for you - Singing it for you during the final segment  - It is safe to say that you are one of his inspirations when writing a song for their next album 

Seonghwa: 

- A gentleman from the start - Would be happy to do anything for you (that you sometimes intervene and tell him to get some rest) - Will introduce you to his group, his manager and everyone inside KQ  - Lowkey will get jealous whenever WooSan are around you  - He will literally drag you away from them because he wants a t t e n t i o n - Taking turns in babying each other  - Mentally he is taking down notes of all the things you love  - Him adoring your small habits and even picking them up - Towards the end of the program, he will have a hard time letting you go  - But he doesn’t say anything because this program is all just an act but he really did pick up feelings for you - The boys will note his sudden change in habit and will point it out and ask him if that’s what WGM did to him - Of course he wouldn’t admit it but he looks forward to seeing you again - Wondering if they can try together again minus the scripted program 

Yunho: 

- Whatever he does, he does it with great effort - When playing games with the boys and you’re present, he will make sure to win the game - ^ All because he wants to show off at how good he is at playing games - ^^ And then the boys will beg him not to destroy them  - Game nights, movie nights, cafe hopping  - Dates with Yunho are the best  - Will take his time and introduce you to his family - And his family thinking that you really are together  - You wanted to tell them the truth but Yunho spoke faster and said that you two are together - Getting his close to him parents and his brother - His mom being so proud that her son found a good a woman for him  - Already asking when is the wedding and a grandson - And when the program is about to end, Yunho asked for your contact details - Because even when the show has ended, he still wants to contact you 

Yeosang: 

- Yeo would be so flustered, he would stammer upon meeting you - Would decorate your house with a lot of hehetmon drawings - You feel sad? Here’s a happy hehetmon cheering for you - You would then have to scold him because eating too much chicken isn’t good - Until he made a compromise with you - 3 chicken dinners a week  - You can feel the high blood forming but you realize that it can be fixed just by drinking water and you agree to it - Teaching you how to control his drones - When you ask him to get something for you, he will use his drones to give it you - So when the show is about to end, he starts to give you hints on where to go and find - ^ Obviously using his drones - Would cheer for you even after your pairing has ended 

San: 

- Would beg the producers to at least give him three hints on who his paired partner is - But since the producers wouldn’t give him any clue, he would take matters into his own - Would close down a cafe for the day for him  - Getting you a bouquet, an assortment of sweets and a teddy bear - You think its too much but San says its just enough - You were wondering where the barista is and you were shocked to find out that it was also San who would be serving you coffee - A day prior to filming, he took a mini course on how to make cappucino and he proudly served you one  - Taking you to his hometown and giving you a mini tour there - The neighborhood recognizing San and your heart would swell with emotions because you’re so happy of what he achieved in his career - The two of you annoying Wooyoung to no end - And when the program is about to end, San would cling onto your waist tightly - He feels like the three months he spent with you went by so fast  - And he doesn’t want to let you go - But the three months he spent with you, he’ll cherish them forever 

Mingi: 

- Prior before filming, he would be so nervous and would ask his mom for tips on how to make a great impression  - But his heart would stop beating upon seeing you in your wedding dress - Would be so happy that he completely forgot that this is just a variety show - He’s so into the program that he really feels like he’s married to you and has husband duties to fulfill - The boys don’t bother to give him a reality check because seeing as to how he’s so happy about the program made them so happy for him too - Always bringing him food to eat in case he forgot to eat when he’s immersed with his work - You start bringing food for the rest of the boys too  - Mingi being a big baby and complaining that it should only be him that you’re cooking for  - Writing a song about you and insisting EDEN and Hongjoong to add the song into their upcoming album - If EDEN agrees then so does Hongjoong - And EDEN agrees - Would be so devastated when the show is ending  - Because he has fallen for you - And so when the show ends, he hopes that you would still contact him as he would be more than happy to keep contact with you too 

Wooyoung: 

- Dresses to impress - Would lowkey feel embarrassed at his members during his “wedding day”  - Doesn’t want you getting to close to Yeosang, San, Seonghwa, Yunho, Hongjoong, Jongho - ^ Basically the other boys because he says its annoying - But deep down, he’s just a jealous baby  - Will constantly annoy the members that at least he has someone to cuddle and sleep with at night - Out of contract but would create a whole new segment for you and him at their official Youtube account  - He does this because he’s aware of the three months contract and he wants to look back at the videos that you two made together - Seonghwa losing his wits because its feels like another Wooyoung was formed in you  - When the show is about to end, he asks for an extension  - However the producers wouldn’t agree, therefore, Wooyoung will just create another WGM but its just him and you for a long time 

Jongho: 

- Would ask for tips from his hyungs on how to impress a girl  - And so all seven of them took an adventure into Jjong’s wardrobe and mix and matched his clothes - On the first day of meeting, he would serenade you - Would lowkey feel embarrassed because his hyungs are fake crying on his “wedding day”  - San making a joke at how their youngest got married before Hongjoong and Hongjoong hitting San afterwards  - Will ask you about the past guys you’ve been with before he smoothly answers “I’m glad you met me because I intend to be your last”  - Jongho - 1 - Would show his strength off at you - And you being impressed at the number of things he can do - Liking how he calls you “noona”  - When the program is about to end, he would be disappointed  - Disappointed because WGM is a good variety show and the only thing he hates about it is that it ends - His heart would leap whenever he sees you out of WGM  - Would be having a hard time re adjusting back to his old life after getting married to you 

[cedricslover]

This is for the birthday boy!! Happy Birthday Remus Lupin. The guy a lot of people simp for and also a lot of people who want him to be their dad (I am guilty). We love you so much!!!!

GIF NOT MINE, CREDITS TO THE RIGHTFUL OWNER<3

Pairing: Remus x Sirius. Remus as reader's father.

Warnings: none

Word count: 645

"AAAAAAAAH!!!" you screamed to the top of your lungs and the next thing you knew Remus is now in the doorstep of your room. "What's wrong sweetheart?" He asked with heavy breathing, he probably ran to your room from his office. 

You ran to his back and touched the hem of his shirt. "Dad… there's a spider. There" you pointed to a corner of the room. Remus laughed and got a jar from your bedside table. 

"Seriously princess, you're not afraid of a werewolf but you're afraid of a spider?" He cracked laughing while your brows furrowed, you looked at him with serious eyes.

"Well I know you won't hurt me dad, unlike that spider, Merlin knows what it can do to me. It might jump to my pretty face while I'm sleeping, or- or, it might ruin my things by doing those spider webs. See that? You can't do any of that, only that hideous one" you stared at the jar with the spider inside it and if looks can kill that spider might need a funeral. 

"Is that what your Uncle Sirius taught you?" He answered you while still stifling a laugh, "Can't I call him dad though? I mean you know" you looked at him, raising your eyebrows anticipating his answer. He smiled sweetly to you and patted your head, "Of course it's up to him, and to you. We're not married therefore I don't know if you'd like to call him that" he replied to your question and left the room. 

"Uhm- Uncle Sirius?" You suddenly talked while you three were having dinner, Sirius shifted his gaze to you and said "Yes princess?" His voice was so sweet to you, unlike how he talks to your dad, they always bicker at each other but not in a bad way, only a teasing way. 

You slowly put down your utensils, tension slowly formed in the room. Remus was there beside you, confused and tensed at the same time. 

"Can I uh- call you dad?" You said and looked at Sirius in the eyes, you heard Remus' relieved sigh unlike Sirius whose eyes became wide and he inhaled too much that made his chest so puff. 

"Sirius? Sirius!" Remus called his attention that made him snap from zoning out. 

Sirius looked at you, shock was still visible in his face. "Are you sure about that little one? I'm not married to your father" he said and glanced at Remus for a second. 

You smiled and said "of course I'm totally fine with it, honestly I'm more comfortable calling you dad rather than uncle when you already snogged with my father" you laughed and Remus choked on his water. "And I'm not a little one!" You added "I'm already in my sixth year" and you continued eating. 

"Oooh, the same year as those twins and who was that again? The one they call pretty boy, oh I was called pretty boy too back in the days. Right Remus?" Sirius said to you.

"You? Pretty boy? Please spare me the joke" you replied while laughing that made you choke, "Don't talk while your mouth is full young lady" Remus told you and handed you a glass of water. 

The whole night was filled with laughter and joy, finally, that big needle stuck in Sirius and Remus' chest was gone. Both of them were afraid, even though since you were little both of them raised you, they were afraid that you would just consider Remus as your adoptive father since he was practically the one who really raised you and Sirius was just there to help him, but now, you consider both of them as your dads. Nothing can make Sirius so happy than to be accepted by the girl she considers as her daughter, her princess, the one she would die for, her little wolf.  

[princessfbi]

Ok I have got to know what happened with Oliver's character on that one show that makes you rage so hard every time you see him.

WELL NONNIE I'LL TELL YOU!

This is a warning for spoilers if anyone wants to watch this show because my rage cannot be contained.

OK SO...

This show is called Into the Badlands and Oliver's character is named Ryder. Basically the premise of this world is that it's kind of post apocalyptic/alternative universe where humanity got so caught up in trying to one up each other that it sort of imploded and now you have this society where either you're super wealthy (the Barrons), super poor (Cogs and Nomads), or somehow a ninja (The Clippers and whatever the hell MK was supposed to be). ANYWAYS....

Ryder is the son of Barron Quinn. Now the surviving land is either divided into like factions run by Barrons (who control a majority of major trade) or there's these lawless lands that are run dredges of society. You either become a Barron by killing another Barron (which is what Quinn did) or you are an heir apparent. Ryder is more an heir presumptive because Quinn won't outright name him his heir even though everyone just assumes it.

This is because Quinn is batshit crazy and thinks he can just live forever through sheer stubbornness and will alone. This is especially hard to do because he has a massive brain tumor that's dwindling down what little bit of sanity he has leading him to make questionable choices such as killing the only doctor they have in the lands who would've been useful pretty much for the rest of the series but go off Quinn. Ryder has a lot of resentment towards his father, which I will get into in a minute, and at the same time has gone out of his way to prove to Quinn that he's a worthy heir. Except Quinn keeps comparing Ryder to his second and regent, Sunny, and he's just all around a shitty person in general.

NOW HERE'S THE AMAZING BACKSTORY WITH RYDER:

So, when Ryder was a child, he was kidnapped by these nomads who were trying to blackmail Quinn. Ryder's mother begged Quinn to pay the ransom and save Ryder. Quinn... refused. So the nomads tortured Ryder and (Gross warning) like cut off part of his toes and disfigured his foot in the hopes of crippling him and scaring Quinn into giving to their demands.

Quinn, again, refused.

Eventually Quinn's regent at the time, Waldo, defies Quinn's orders and goes to rescue Ryder from these nomads. Waldo defying Quinn is a big deal because he's a clipper which is basically a soldier (often brought in from the slave faction called Cogs) and they take their oaths to their Barrons very seriously. Barrons trust no one but their regents because again you can become a Barron by killing them. But Waldo always had a soft spot for Ryder.

SO Ryder is saved and eventually nursed back to health but he always has a bit of a tragedy cloud hanging around him because from what we were told Ryder was a very sweet, bright child before he was kidnapped and was brought back as "a broken bird" and he's been doing everything he can to get rid of the broken bird image ever since.

Quinn resented Ryder for making him look weak and Ryder resented Quinn for... Well being a heartless dick.

But here's the crazy part... They both, in their own way, still kind of loved each other.

Now I won't bore you with my rant about how the best antagonists are often the tragic figures who have fallen from grace (Peter Hale, Draco Malfoy, Loki to name a few) BUT I will say Ryder had the PERFECT foundation of showing that fall. He was an asshole and hard and spoiled and super privilege but also soft and still a little broken. There's a whole other narrative involved too with his childhood love and how his dad planned on marrying her but we won't get into that.

ANYWAYS Ryder still had this desperate need to prove to his dad that he was a worthy heir but in his attempts to prove himself (and his dad's fall into madness) his dad started seeing him as competition. Competition and another objects (like Quinn saw with most other characters but especially Sunny). But Quinn has this weird kind of pride when it comes to things that he considers his and an attack on his property is an attack on him. There's a character named the Widow who lured Ryder out and tried to kill him slowly and personally as well as Sunny as an attack on Quinn and he went bananas (sorta).

Ryder was fine eventually but he realized that trying to prove himself to his dad was never going to work so he decides to try the other option: which is killing his dad. Partially because if he doesn't, Ryder is smart enough to know that Quinn's going to get him killed, but also because Quinn's descent into madness is spiraling faster and faster and Ryder wants to protect the legacy. Nothing to inherit if his dad burns the whole thing to the ground!

Long story short, Sunny turns on Quinn and stabs him and everyone thinks Quinn is dead and Ryder takes credit for it therefore succeeding his dad by becoming not only Barron of his father's lands but some other Barron that got murdered by another subplot that was pointless.

Now Ryder is determined to bring peace to the lands (not out of some noble obligation but because he just wants people to chill the fuck out). And for the most part... he's doing okay.

BUT THEN PLOT TWIST HIS DAD IS ALIVE AND CRAZIER THAN EVER.

Basically his dad storms Ryder's house, chases him down in the garden, and they fight. But Ryder's foot that was crippled when he was a child trips him up and the fight gets even messier. Ryder's sword breaks and Quinn points the sword to his own chest and tells Ryder to finish him.

Ryder hesitates and so Quinn takes the sword and stabs Ryder. You know like a rational father would do.

Quinn then asks Ryder why he hesitated and Ryder whispers "because you're my father" before he dies in Quinn's arms. Quinn is... horrified because he realizes that with the death of Ryder is the death of the last parts of his own humanity. He mourns Ryder but also like... takes no responsibility for killing him but neither did Ryder so he can't process it. Later on he's haunted by Ryder but again the man has a giant grapefruit sized tumor in his brain so it's all very reverse Hamlet if you will.

SO LOOK AT ALL THIS POTENTIAL!

THE REASON I RAGE:

Is because Ryder was set up to fail from the beginning. Which is great!....... If that had actually happened. The show worked so hard to tell us that Ryder was a failure and a coward but if you look at it from a story perspective... Ryder was the opposite of a failure. Every time someone told him he couldn't do something, he proved them wrong. Again and again and again. But that was never good enough for anyone. So that vicious cycle would've been amazing to see!

But instead of exploring any of that, we had to watch a storyline that was frankly ridiculous from the beginning that took up way more time than it should. There's a character named MK, who was supposed to be inspired by the myth The Monkey King, but if you don't know that story then you never would've figured that out. Hell, I knew the story and didn't figure it out until I had to google his name because I kept forgetting it. In comparison to everything else happening in the show, this magical mythical storyline just didn't fit and I'm not kidding when I say I watched a season and a half of this show and forgot about MK every time.

Now if you noticed my icon is Buck in a Box. That's an inside joke I have with a friend about this fucking show. The first scene starts off with Sunny stumbling onto a group of Nomads who go absolutely feral about this massive box they don't want him to look inside. Turns out MK was in this box for reasons that were too weak for me to even remember but again MK was entirely forgettable. My friend and I kept talking about how it would've been better if Ryder had been in the box because the Ryder and Sunny rivalry had so much unexplored potential that would've been incredible if we started from the very beginning instead of just being told over and over again that Ryder hates being compared to Sunny.

Sunny is the main character and Quinn, unlike with Ryder, was incredibly proud to have Sunny "in his possession" and Ryder hated him for it.

But did we get to explore that? NO! Did we get to explore the parallels of Sunny and Ryder chafing at being considered possessions by Quinn? NO! Did we get to explore the trauma Ryder was working so hard to shake off? NO!

Instead the show spent so much energy victim blaming Ryder essentially for being the son of a Villain and his Nonsensical Ambitious Mother who had the misfortune of being kidnapped by bandits as a child while telling the audience that Ryder was never going to succeed. That Ryder had no honor and was a coward and weak.

They spent way more time trying to tell us that we should hate Ryder and that he was a bad guy but didn't do ANY of the work to show the fall from grace to prove that. Ryder remained a tragic figure that didn't fall from grace but was rather pushed off by lazy writing because they wanted to focus again on this magical ninja boy with a penchant for getting in the way and ruining everything.

I rage because Antagonist and Villain are not the same thing. Ryder had the potential of becoming a villain and his death by the hands of his father would've cycled him back into the role of a tragic figure. But instead... it was just wasted.

THAT is why I rage. You had the material right there and yet you spent so long telling us that we, the audience, don't like Ryder instead of showing us anything that would make us not like him (besides the whiny white boy thing).

Instead I found myself rooting for Ryder. Like could you imagine if Ryder and Sunny went against Quinn together instead of having the weakest rivalry known to man? Could you imagine Ryder's fall from grace of wanting peace in the lands as it turned to greed? Could you imagine Sunny becoming actual competition for Ryder instead of being manipulated to do so?

WE GOT NONE OF IT.

THIS is why I rage.

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - The Lost Treasure of Herz Der Sonne

So now we get to what is, in my opinion, the best episode in season three. However, it’s still season three, so that’s damning with faint praise. 

Summary: Rapunzel tasks the kingdom with refurbishing the throne room. While breaking down a wall, they find a map to the Lost Treasure of Herz Der Sonne and Rapunzel decides to set up a race to the location. The teams, which consist of twos, are only allowed to look at the map briefly before the start of the race. However, Rapunzel's partner, Feldspar, brings a copy of the map with him and he warns her that the treasure is cursed. 

Why Are You Just Getting to This Now? 

It’s literally been months since you defeated the Saporians. Edmund had to have time to travel all this way to Corona and you’ve rebuilt an entire village since then. We’re talking at bare minimum three months or more. 

Who just leaves a gapping hole inside their home for three months? Where did you conduct the government’s important business during that time? Is there any other structural damage to the castle or the town outside from previous battles that you’ve just left unattended? I understand that rebuilding Old Corona is important but those villagers have been evacuated and living elsewhere for a year and a half now since Queen for a Day. It wasn’t a priority, but this is. 

Also this episode has to come after The Return of the King and Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf because Red, Angry, and Hamuel exist. It can’t just be slotted in somewhere else in order for it to make more sense. The writers genuinely planned for Rapunzel to be this disorganized and didn’t think to give a logical reason as to why. 

Also Why Are You Conscripting Regular Citizens Instead of Hiring Professional Contractors?

Unlike Old Corona, which is a full on community that would require multiple building projects going on simultaneously and therefore could use volunteers, this is a single government building. It’s Rapunzel’s job as leader to make sure that that building is kept maintained and up to code. It’s her responsibility not the regular average citizen’s who has their own jobs to do and zero experience with construction.  

Rapunzel is literally forcing these people to be slave labor for her under the pretense of ‘community’. She’s taking their time away from their own busy lives, forcing them to work a dangerous job, and not compensating them for that time, effort, and risk. And no, they’re not just volunteers at this point; because as acting queen, no one can safely say no to her nor can they just leave even when they’re clearly annoyed and fed up at having to do the work.  

Lastly they’re untrained. They lack the skills and tools to this job. You need an architect, you need a safety inspector, you need actual carpenters and masonries ... maybe even an interior decorator... The point is you need trained professionals and part of being an administrator is using government funding to hire these people in order to make sure the work gets done safely and efficiently and create jobs and keep money circulating through the economy.       

Rapunzel may not mean any harm. She might just be oblivious and untrained herself. But this is terrible leadership and the show never points that out. It never has her learn how to be a better a ruler so by the end of the series you don't feel she’s earned that title of Queen and you fear for the kingdom’s continued existence.   

So Why Is This Here?

Why would there be a Saporian map to a king of Corona’s tomb hidden in the wall? What’s the story behind this? 

Yes we know his wife was Saporian, but that doesn’t explain anything. Why would she need a map on the wall to her own husband’s resting place; assuming he didn’t out live her himself. Why would said map be carved into the wall of Corona’s castle and not written on a scroll? Why is it in Saporian when they don't speak that language in Corona? 

Like I could come up with explanations and create this whole backstory for Herz Der Sonne and the first Saporian/Coronian War, but at this point I’d just be doing the work of the writers for them. They’re the ones who introduced this lore and had it inform plot points and character motivation; and then failed to explain any of it to the audience and adequately have it all connect back together in a way that makes sense. 

The Moment When You Realize This Whole Episode Exists Because Zachary Levi Enjoys Doing an Ed Wynn Impersonation 

Ok time to explain some behind the scenes Info.

This is Ed Wynn. 

As you can tell from the gif above, he’s famous for voicing the Mad Hatter in Disney’s Alice in Wonderland. He’s also done a whole bunch of other stuff and was well known even before working with Disney, but the Mad Hatter is his most well remembered role today. 

Many actors, particularly voice actors, like to do impressions of him because he has such a distinctive voice. Including Eugene’s VA, Zachery Levi.  

Now I don’t know if the character of Feldspar was created specifically because the creators were inspired by Zachery Levi’s impression, or if they had this character already planned out and just casted him in the role since he could do it and it’d save them money. Either scenario is plausible and not unheard of in animation. But the long and short of it is, as a shoemaker, Feldspar is intended to be a parody of the Mad Hatter. That is why the character exists. 

Now as I said, this isn’t unusual for animated tv shows. Quite often you get main cast members to voice secondary and/or one off characters because it’s convenient, efficient, and doable when working with audio recordings. Also quite often voice actors will do impressions of other famous people to flesh out these background characters. It’s also not out of left field for these secondary characters to get an episode of focus if they’ve been around for awhile and keep popping up in the story. 

What is unusual, however, is to focus on said character in the final season when there are a bunch of other more important characters with unresolved arcs that need the screen time more. It’s an incredibly odd decision to highlight Feldspar here when we still got Varian readjusting back into society, Red and Angry settling into their new home, and Edmund running around off screen. And while some of these character feature in the episode, they’re just there for the jokes not for any development. 

What’s a “Sap Pond” and How Does That Even Work?

Ok its a fantasy world, I get it. But the franchise does try to have a distinction between the magical and the mundane. Or at least pretends to try and have a distinction. There’s to my knowledge no such thing as a ‘sap pond’, and if such a thing does exist I doubt it’s an actual deep pit full of tree sap as shown here. 

If you want characters to still be surprised by out of the ordinary occurrences and have the supernatural world be separate from the regular world; then you need to have the mundane world grounded in our known reality. Nature needs to function as real world nature would. If something exists in your world that doesn't in ours, then you need to either explain it or have the characters responded appropriately to it. 

But You’re a Prince Now?

Look, I’ll buy that season one Eugene didn’t have unlimited access to the royal treasury as he and Rapunzel were still new to their roles and their relationship. But it’s been over two years since the movie ended. 

Since then Eugene and Rapunzel have lived together, shared finances together, and currently are co-acting rulers of the kingdom. He’s also a bonified prince in of itself on top of being practically married to princess/queen. 

Yeah I said it. Part of what makes season three so frustrating is that Rapunzel and Eugene are functionally married at this point, they just haven’t gone through the ceremony yet, and there’s no stated reason for why they keep dragging things out.  

This is why we get out of place jokes like this that no longer reflect who Eugene is now as a person and feel like they belong back in season one or the even the movie itself. 

I can understand if he wanted to join in the competition because it’s fun, but he’s not poor. Neither he nor Rapunzel needs the treasure. I’m not sure even Lance needs it because as Eugene’s best friend/adopted brother he’s piratically nobility at this point as well. 

Royalty and the rich are not and never will be underdogs show. Stop trying to make them such. 

So Why Feldspar Again? 

This is such a half assed plot point. 

Remember Rapunzel literally pulled out a book earlier to translate the map.  Xavier not only knows the legends about the Saporians, but also keeps a book of magic lying around, and the Saporians are the only human people who have functioning magic in the show as part of their culture.    Varian spent a year living and working with the Saporian leader, and knows how to decipher ancient scrolls written in dead languages.  And said Saporians, are being currently held in the dungeons of the castle.  

But you’re telling me that only a random cobbler can read the warning clearly written on the map? 

They give some bullshit reason as to why Feldspar knows Sapoprian but it doesn’t matter. It’s a forced and contrived excuse to get the character involved in a plot he has no business being in. The story fails to justify the use him over the other more prominent characters who have closer ties to this particular subplot. 

And We’re Suppose to Believe That Herz Der Sonne Was a Good Guy?

Why would a benevolent king who supposedly brought peace to a warring land have a doomsday curse involving zombies? Why would said king be enshrined a tomb that’s not native to his culture? What even is the treasure and why be buried with it? 

There’s clearly more going on here regarding Corona’s past and the treatment of the Saporians as a people in their own right, but the show never does anything with it. Why introduce these complexities and world building if you’re not going to tell a story with them? Why have the Saporian subplot at all in a series already over stuffed with villains if you aren’t going to have them challenge your protagonist and have her grow into a more mature person? 

I’m not dunking on the series for being ambitious nor for having flavor text to help flesh out the world, but it so aggravating that there’s no follow through on the show’s set ups and narrative promises. If you’re not going to give the needed focus to something then just don’t put it in. Cause once it’s aired you’re committed to it and the audience is going to hold you to account. 

I haven’t seen plot mismanagement this bad since the 80s; back when cartoons had to battle network syndication, episode commissions instead of contracted seasons, and could be canceled at any time without prior notice. Now there’s still plenty of bad practices going on in the industry, especially as the move to streaming messes with things, but Tangled does not have the same excuses as say Johnny Quest, Dungeons and Dragons, or even Gargoyles did. 

How Do You Even Know That Would Work, Rapunzel?

No seriously, how does Rapunzel know that putting the treasure chest back on the pedestal will stop the cruse? That hasn’t been established yet by any known source of information. Heck no one knew what the curse actually entailed until it was activated. Except for Xavier who oh so conveniently didn’t say anything until the last moment. If anyone should have the knowledge to on how to end the curse it’s him. But nope we gotta make the Rapunzel the infallible hero who is always right for no logical reason.  

I don’t know how to explain this to you show, but perfect is boring. No one wants a flawless protagonist who can do it all 24/7 without any help whatsoever. And it becomes down right annoying to watch a hero who is clearly flawed still put upon a narrative pedestal as if they weren’t. 

So Why is Varian Suddenly Useless In This Fight?

This entire climax is about showcasing the ‘power of teamwork’ by having the characters use their various skills sets and work together to defeat the enemy. 

Except for Varian. 

He’s treated at best as a spectator to the unfolding events and at worst as a damsel in distress. 

Varian. You know the guy who is the series most competent and threating antagonist. Who brought an entire kingdom to it’s knees, twice. The only other character besides Rapunzel herself who could and does hold his own against other major antagonists, including super powered ones.  

If this was just a one off incident, I’d just shrug it away as him being a glass cannon; insanely overpowered when well prepared but easily out of his depth when not. But that’s not what’s happening here. 

Season three constantly nerfs Varian’s abilities, same as they did back in The Alchemist Returns, and there’s three reasons for this. 

The first is to try and stop him from overshadowing Rapunzel and Cassandra. The writers don’t want to give him any more story focus for fear of him being more popular the the two girls. Which is a ridiculous and petty reason to write a character OOC but there you go. 

The second is the on going issue of making Rapunzel needlessly the center of any and all solutions to every problem regardless of her level of involvement in the initial conflict. Yes, it’s her show, but she’s still not the whole world. Other people exist outside of her and it’s not fair to anybody when the writers ignore that simple fact.   

Last is the writers sacrificing established character for a joke. And as already pointed out, even in this very review, Varian’s not the only character to fall victim to this. It’s just bad writing. Yeah the joke might be funny in the moment but you run the risk of jarring you’re audience’s immersion. In a series like Tangled where you’re constantly asking the audience to suspend their disbelief, humor needs to be firmly rooted in the characters natural behaviors and must evolve to match any character development.   

Why not just have Varian throw a chimball or two, run out cause he wasn’t planning on fighting anybody that day, and then have the other characters rescue him? It’s not that hard to work in a joke while still being respectful of the characters.  

So What Does Anybody Learn From This Episode?

Yeah the other characters learn some vague lesson on teamwork and getting along or something, but they’re not the focus of the episode. What do Rapunzel and Feldspar learn? 

Unlike some people I don’t mind Feldspar’s existence. When’s he’s kept as a background character he works. In fact he’s one of the few townspeople who do work as intended, because he’s representative of the everyday citizen who’s often on the outside looking in on these fantastical events and therefore gives insight into what’s going on and the populous’ opinions on things without being a major player in anything. 

That's fine, needed even, and I don’t mind him getting a single focus episode to gain a greater insight into how this world works or even flesh out his character more, but that’s not what we got. Feldspar doesn’t grow as a character because of this episode. I, as the viewer watching, learn nothing about him nor his life that I didn’t already know. This resolution with him resolves nothing cause it’s a ending for a conflict that was never established beforehand.  

In fact what even was the main conflict of the story? Rapunzel being annoyed by Feldspar? Ok and..? Did she need to learn not to be annoyed by him? Was that a thing that needed to be addressed? Hasn’t Rapunzel already put up with annoying people before now? Was was this deficiency of character actually solved by this one interaction? Has she learned to be more appreciative, attentive, or open minded of others? 

If you tell me it’s Rapunzel’s show then I expect Rapunzel to actually learn shit! 

I expect the external conflicts to tie back into her interpersonal conflicts. If the external conflict does not do that than there better well be a another character who gets that focus instead without her hogging the limelight. 

This Dynamic Adds Nothing

They set up this friendship with Varian and Xavier and it doesn't go anywhere. It never comes back into play and we never see them interacting on screen together again. It also undermines a future plot point that’s coming up later. 

More over it doesn’t further either of their characters. 

Xavier is still an extraneous exposition fairy. Turning his flat characterization into a one note joke does not erase that fact. Giving him a kid to tell stories to doesn’t explain his place in the narrative or give him purpose to the story. We still don’t know why he has these connections to magic nor how he knows all the this lore, and he doesn’t push the plot forward. 

Meanwhile Varian maybe lonely but that doesn’t mean he needs yet another mentor figure in his life. We already have his father, who we barely see him interact with since coming back, and all his other ‘friends’ are way older then him already as well. Rapunzel’s the closest in age to him and she is constantly condescending to, well everybody, as she pretends to be more mature than she actually is. There’s no one in the story who Varian is on equal footing with, and no Angry and Red don't count as they’re far younger than him. 

I don’t know what this series has against teenagers but it showcases some very unhealthy depictions of them; ether by constantly infantilizing them, traumatizing them while subjecting them to parentification, or just flat out ignoring their existence all together. 

Teenagers exist and they need to be treated as teenagers. I don’t know how to put it more simply than that. Teens aren’t children. Teens aren’t adults. They’re teens. And when writing for them you need to understand that difference and acknowledge that they have a completely different phycological development and placement within society to anybody else. That’s why the category of adolescence exists separately from childhood and adulthood in the first place.   

So to tie things back to the first point. The concept of Xavier and Varian having a friendship is not a problem. But as with so many things on this show, it’s the surrounding context and lack of follow through where the issues arises. 

Varian needs a friend his age, who is his equal, more so than a mentor; if indeed Xavier is even intended to serve that function as he doesn’t do any real mentoring. This should have been an opportunity to bring Faith in and establish her better. In fact it’s reasons like this why she should have been a bigger character all along but we’ll get more into that as we get to her only ‘focus’ episode. 

Conclusion 

It’s fun seeing all the various character interactions and unique team ups. Also the humor does work. The jokes do land even if they do bulldoze through established canon. Plus seeing Rapunzel actually annoyed by shit going on around her is always entertaining as it humanizes her. If watched in isolation from the rest of season three, this is an enjoyable episode. But that’s it’s core problem. I shouldn’t have to find filler to keep me going in the last leg of the show. 

This was pretty short comparatively speaking with the rest of the ones I have to write for S3, but longer ones are going to come out more slowly just due to real life and time. As always though you’re support is helpful in keeping going, and if you feel like you can donate to my Ko-fi and leave a tip there. 

https://ko-fi.com/rachelbethhines

[writingmanaged]

Fluff Alphabet (Remus Lupin)

Ship: Remus Lupin x Reader

Triggers: None! Just some fluffy little werewolf!

A - Activities (Hobbies and things you like to do together)

Remus is a huge nerd. So, do not be surprised if he loves to stay inside with you and cuddle while you he reads out loud. You'll also have lots of study dates! ;) (You'll just be studying where did your mind fly off to? Jk) But if you enjoy going outside, he'd do both things. However, expect him to always have a book in his ripped bag.

B - Baby (do they want to have a baby with you?)

Yes and no. He does want to have a baby with you of course, but he is very anxious about it. He thinks about all the things that could go wrong, especially considering his fury little problem... "What if I end up biting him or her, y/n!?" "Remus John Lupin do you honestly believe the others would let that happen!?" But you can't really change his mind and deep inside you know he has a good point.

C - Comfort (how to they comfort you after a bad day?)

Oh dear, you should know by now that you are dealing with the KING of comfort. He knows how you must feel, he is a pretty anxious person. He will hold you close, play with your hair, give you multiple soft kisses and won't let go until he makes sure you are okay.

D - Dancing (do they like to dance with you)

He is a shy boi. Aka no. He is afraid of embarrassing you in front of a crowd. However, he will dance with you privately if you like. He will definitely dance with you if he is drunk, so it is worth trying ;)

E - Eating (meals together)

Eat, you'll feel better. No, seriously he would say it a lot. As long as you are dating Werewolf Mcwerewolf you will not get hungry. "What do you mean you are on a diet!? You don't need it! At least have some salad." "Y/n, you are not leaving this room until you finish your plate"

"but plates here refill themselves, Remus!"

F - Favourite (their favourite part on you)

Your hands. Oh gosh, he absolutely adores them! His own hands are so big, he just loves to take your hands in his and hold them tightly. He would also kiss them all the time. If he had money he would buy you rings but this boy is poor

G - Gifts (what it says)

Remus is pretty poor so he couldn't possibly give you something expensive. However, his gifts are really meaningful. Remember that one time you were rumbling about a movie? He'll buy you the book. That other time you were really jealous of that girl's hair? He'll buy you a straightener. He is the type of person who would make handmade stuff too.

H - Hair (how you treat each other's hair)

He thinks his hair is plain and boring. Who can blame him, his roomate is Sirius freaking Black. But you simply adore it. He doesn't understand how, but he for one thing is definitely in love with yours. He really likes that nice smell it gives out.

I - Ironing (who does the chores?)

He does. He doesn't let you do anything. He is really insecure and thinks very lowly of himself. He thinks the least he can do is take care of the house. You completely disagree but it's not like he is willing to listen.

J - Jokes (would you pull jokes on each other)

No. He deeply respects you and although he might say some nice smart jokes every now and then, he would never prank you. His friends however, definitely would. And then it was time for your revenge prank... God help those innocent marauders. You two are a powerful duo.

K - Kissing (how are their kisses?)

Mostly he is a very soft kisser. He likes to gently touch his lips on yours and devour them slowly. But that changes during nights before full moon when he is rough and demanding.

L - Lies (would you lie to each other?)

Definitely not. But don't let that deceive you. Mr. Lupin can be a very good liar when he needs to. He simply despises dishonesty more than anything in the world. He'd always tell you the truth and expect you to do the same.

M - Money (how do you handle money?)

With difficulty. Even if you are rich, he would never accept money from you. He'd feel like he is using you. And you know what that means... Eternally struggling with bills.

N - No (things they are not okay with)

Hurting you. This seems very obvious, and it is but his worst fear is causing you harm. If he ever grabbed on you a bit too tight a few nights before full moon, he'd hate himself and probably wouldn't talk to anyone for a week. He'd never forgive himself if anything happened to you, especially if it is because of him.

I - Outdoors (do you spend more time outdoors or indoors?)

Team introvert!! He simply adores staying inside. If you are an extrovert he'd go out with you as much as possible. But come on guys, as we saw on A staying inside with him is the best thing in the world.

P - Partying (do they like partying with you?)

Hahahahahahahahaha no. Seriously, he despises these gatherings. He only ever went when James and Sirius dragged him along. If you had fun in those, he'd come but don't be surprised if you find him reading his book in the bathroom.

Q - Question (marriage and how they feel about it)

The law is a bit complicated about relationships with werewolves. It really depends on the government. Therefore, even if he does want to marry you, you'd have to wait until it was legal. When it was, he wouldn't waste a second before asking you the big question.

R - Right (do you argue a lot? Who usually wins?)

He is generally a peaceful person so you don't fight too much. But when you do, I'm sorry to disappoint but he does. He is incredible at debating and turning your own point against you. Remus Lupin for president

S - Sick (taking care of each other when sick)

It's not exactly sickness, but Remus does have a fury little problem. Which means you'd have to take care of him in bed half of your life! Don't worry, the first 5 times are hard but then you get the hang of it.

T - Tears (do they cry a lot? Do they do it in front of you?)

Although he does have lots of reasons to cry, he doesn't do it a lot. He is really strong and can keep himself mentally stable. Nevertheless, when he does cry he does it in private. He would never like to worry you.

U - Until death tears us apart (does your relationship last long? Do you ever get apart)

No you don't! If you exclude his full moon nights, you'll be together from the day you met to the day you die. You'll most likely die together in the Battle of Hogwarts...

V - Victim (what do they do if someone blames you for something you didn't do?)

Remus keeps calling himself a monster. But if he ever does seem or act like one, it is in a situation like this. How dare they accuse you!? You are so innocent. He'd kick their butts and probably get points given to Gryffindor for it.

W - Working out (what it says)

He doesn't work out a lot. But he does enjoy going out for runs which is why his body is in such great shape, especially considering all the chocolate he eats. Although he doesn't work out, he'd love to try out going to the gym along with you!

X - Xoxo (how do they text?)

Formally. He doesn't get it. He confuses it with owls. You still laugh at the thought of that 4 paragraph long text that simply asked how your day was. It even had a signature.

Y - Yours (Are they possesive? Do they get jealous a lot?)

He trusts you a lot generally speaking. He is okay with all of your male friends. But if he senses someone is being more than healthy, oh boy... It is another V situation.

Z - Zzzz... (How you sleep together)

Spooning! He is the big spoon. He needs to feel you near him while he is sleeping. He has to know you are there for him and you are alright.

[hawaiian-has-moved]

you aren’t cannon. beetlebabes is more cannon than you. at least that shit was in the musical and movie and cartoon.

Need I remind you idiots, since I have already said I'm no longer being nice to you anymore.

That I do not give a damn what you think it looked like to you in that fucked up brain of yours, it's still p*dophilia. Man it's almost sad I live this rent free in your head for existing. I just exist and your blood boils. It's cute.

Anyway, Lydia is a minor in every version.

And if you think the wedding in the movie was romantic. Man every gross man I've cringed at for being a creepo must have been true love.

But see, that's the thing you people don't get huh? Consent. Consent does not exist to you. If it did you wouldn't fight when people say that Lydia is a minor and therefore cannot consent. It doesn't click because you found something hot about shipping this developing teen with this old as fuck perv.

But oh? Is that not enough for you, you cry, begging to justify your vile ship. Allow me to humor you and go through the other versions.

In fact! I'll analyze a whole song just for you.

Also please look at yet another picture of Lydia obviously not having it.

Way back when I was just ten

Simple and sweet

Everywhere, fellas would stare

Out on the street

And I felt used

Kinda confused

I would refuse to look in their eyes

But now I really love creepy old guys

This is kinda obvious, she's been preyed on before by men. So basic p*do trying to gr**m a kid scenario. But the satire to the song of course is that "it's all fine now" Which it's obviously not, she's just using this to trick him so they can send him back as an end goal.

We all do!

Gum disease

Skin like grilled cheese

Saggy old asses

(Saggy old asses)

Cute and vile

Hey baby, smile

To each girl that passes

They make me blush

(Can't get enough)

Now one of 'em loves me, wants to be mine

(That's right)

Marrying my own creepy old guy!

(I'm a creepy old guy)

This is just more playing out the satire of pretending it's okay, but with Beej chiming in because he already lacks the knowledge that this is grooming and it's not okay. Tricking him into thinking this is fine to end up killing him is a breeze.

My creepy old guy, my creepy old guy

I'm so happy I could cry

Girls may seem disgusted, but we're actually just shy

It's not uncommon that I've heard about or heard someone get told that they're just shy when a gross ass old man or someone is trying to gr**m a kid. It's gaslighting and manipulation in most cases. So for them to say that it's because they're actually just shy as part of the satire is the point.

My creepy old groom (creepy old groom)

Play that wedding tune

Hey folks, step aside

(I am older, but I'm glad I waited)

And if you've watched a bootleg, you would recall Barbara right here smiling and then turning away with eyes wide, like "this is not fucking okay" Kind of look on her face. But yeah this is another one of those phrases that you hear too often in these gross situations.

'Cause here comes the bride

I am marrying my creepy old guy

(Creepy old guy, creepy old guy, creepy old guy)

He's my creepy old guy

(Creepy old guy, creepy old guy, creepy old guy!)

Fix his hair

Get him prepared

For Armageddon

Again if you have seen a bootleg, here Lydia puts a finger to her lips and goes shhhh. Because Armageddon is Beejs death.

Sure, the groom

Crawled out of a tomb

But hey, hey, it's a wedding!

He's really fucking old guys. There is a huge age gap and this is p*dophilia.

So dim the lights

Pick up some rice

Say something nice

It's my day to shine

I'm getting hitched to my creepy old guy

(It's showtime)

Creepy old guy, creepy old guy

She's marrying a creepy old guy

Have you guys seen "Lolita"?

This is just like that, but fine

I have not seen Lolita, but I have been told it's similar to this who marriage scenario and is mega bad. Now if it were Lolita fashion, that is made to ward off men, so I assume it's a movie from what info I have.

Creepy old dude, creepy old dude

Our faith has been renewed

Now love is alive!

Wave your baby girl goodbye

I am walking down the aisle

I wanna see a tear in every eye as I pass by

I know that on the outside he's disgusting

And even on the inside, he's disgusting

This whole scenario is fucking vile. He's vile.

But I know that this time, I'm makin' it right

(Making it right, making it right!)

With my family by my side

O.M.G.

Dressed to a "T"

Fancy and formal

I found me a wife

L'chaim to life

This is so normal!

I was ignored

But now, I'm adored!

'Cause I extorted, tortured, and lied

Give it up for my underage bride!

They've done it, they have successfully tricked him into thinking this is okay with no funny business. But he's about to get stabbed. L'chaim to life is a nod at him being Jewish, also he had a Kippah in the DC version which backed this joke, but it fell off a lot ig so he doesn't have it now. Traditionally there was a lot of marrying women off to much older men for property and stuff, as most religions do/did tho. I was in a production of Fiddler on the roof for example and that was the whole premise.

Here comes the bride

Here comes the bride

God be glorified

I can't believe some cultures think this kind of thing's alright

My creepy old guy

My creepy old guy

Doesn't he deserve a chance at life?

Oh yeah, that's right

Yeah, that's right

So let's make him alive!

I am marrying my creepy old guy!

Guy, guy, guy, creepy old guy

Guy, guy, creepy old guy

Guy, guy

(I have chills)

Yeah!

And then they stab him and the till death do we part sign over the stage all makes sense now because the wedding vows are undone and since he's recently deceased he almost returns to the netherworld.

Etcetera etcetera... But of course you guys go tome deaf at that one when it plays if I remember right.

Oh right, the cartoon, of course, I knew just what you were thinking don't worry. You're thinking "oh well what about the comics, and the valentine cards! And and the animators who drew lewd stuff of Lydia!" Well.... Haha! Still p*dophilia! And also I have seen the infamous Lydia drawing and it's got her head shape, nose, lips, but it's not fully her. Even if it was again my first point, still p*dophilia. And yeah just because the people who worked on it drew it, doesn't make it suddenly okay. Ffs...

I couldn't even find a cartoon wedding that wasn't fan drawn to match this one. Because that doesn't exist! But I do have my favorite point to make.

Beetlejuice's look into Lydia's future in Pest O' the West.

Now why you b*bes were busy being p*dos and gr**ming kids on the internet into thinking this shit is okay, I was mastering the art of common fucking sense.

Beej makes a joking remark that he cannot see into the future while hiding from Bully the Crud, but when he does as per usual, his puns and phrases make his magic go to work. So a crystal ball appears in front of him showing the future in the images I've provided.

Lydia, doing a heaping pile of dishes as a ghost for bully and all of their kids, very unhappy and driven insane. Because imagine what being married to someone it's obviously wrong to be with would do to her mind. He hates seeing her like this, so he rushes to save her. Which he successfully does.

Toon is actually the one with canon evidence of this shit being not okay to him.

Also before anyone tries to say it, no the movie and cartoon aren't connected, she doesn't even live in Winter River in the cartoon that should have made it obvious. Besides she's like 14-16 in the movie. So I don't think she de-aged.

Lastly, two things that are off topic. I believe it's spelled canon, and before anyone goes saying fiction doesn't effect reality, I would like you to explain to me how being a Jedi is a official religion if that is so true.

See anon! I gave you my special, condescending talk that too two hours to type on my phone! You stalked me endlessly and I picked you as the special anon that, I didn't deletes ask for being a gross piece of shit in a minors ask box! Wow. That searching my name clicking on my asks, and typing out all that so I could live rent free in your head really.... Didn't work lol. I may have took two hours to type this, but I assure you I will forget about you in 2 days max. Because unlike you, I have better things to do than ship a minor with an ancient demon. Bye bye now, be sure to rant about me with pure rage to your house p*do friends so that my existence may spread further into other people's minds! Woo... Being famous is so tough. 😉

[goldenkamuyhunting]

Ramblings and crazy theory time about GK chap 267 “Severed”

So we have a new chapter that deals with a painful topic...

...which is nothing else but Wilk’s betrayal of Kiro and of their cause.

We resume the story with… well a flashback showing Kiro writing a letter to Sofia while they were in Karafuto.

We see a glimpse of Ogata behind him, teasing us readers who’re wondering WHERE IN THE WORLD HE IS CURRENTLY AND WHAT THE HELL HE’S DOING as it’s from chap 261 we’ve no info on him and this silence is worrisome.

I love how Noda divided the page in three panels, the top one showing Kiro, while the lower one showing Sofia (Svetlana behind her mirroring how Ogata was behind Kiro) with Akou prison parting them, mirroring how it was the prison who was keeping them parted back then.

Above the images we’ve the content of the letter Kiro is writing.

He’s basically telling her that it might be too early to talk about what happened between him and Wilk in those years with Asirpa, which is why he’s writing it to her.

So, once in Hokkaido he and Wilk parted ways, searching for info about the gold. Their plan was to mix witht he local Ainu and integrate among them so as to get info more easily.

Poor Inkarmat likely got involved with Wilk during this period.

In the end, to better do this, Wilk married and had a daughter.

The following page shows the cover of the chapter, that carefully mirror the cover of chap 256. In chap 256 we had Tsurumi/Hasegawa with his family, while in this chapter we’ve Wilk with his family, each of them in the same exact position as they were in the Hasegawa picture.

In a way it’s kind of painful to place one image next to the other.

Two men, two fathers with their beloved daughters and wives.

Tsurumi lost his family and blamed Wilk for it, Wilk, who made his own family, who had a daughter like Tsurumi, who was among the Hokkaido Ainu trying to discover where they hid their gold, like a spy in short, like Tsurumi.

There’s a huge parallel between these two men and, in a way, I think for Tsurumi the real enemy has never been Hijikata or Sugimoto or Ogata.

He’s still fighting Wilk’s ghost, Wilk who still lives in his own daughter where Tsurumi’s daughter is long dead.

It’s a tragedy, in a way.

But there’s another parallel between them.

They both married to better integrate with the local... but the marriage that was meant to be merely a toll, ultimately caused them to love the daughter who was born out of it and their wife.

They thought to use it to further their goals and, instead, were changed by it. They, who prized themselves so much for their control over the situation and their emotions, lost control.

Anyway let’s go on.

Wilk’s expression as he holds Asirpa impresses Kiro, it was an expression of gentleness he never saw before on Wilk’s face.

This page too is cleverly constructed.

On the top panel we’ve Kiro, with a not pleased expression. As he blamed Wilk’s change to Asirpa’s birth, it’s easy to speculate that seeing such expression on Wilk’s face worried him, it made him think Wilk might not remain loyal to their cause.

On the lower panel there’s Tsurumi.

He also doesn’t look pleased, but likely for different reasons from Kiro. He knows what Wilk might have felt holding his daughter, he know he might have felt the same he had felt when he had held Olga... but the thing probably burned him. The man whom he viewed as the cause of his loss had the chance to hold his own daughter, a daughter Tsurumi can’t hold anymore.

In the middle, parting Kiro from Tsurumi there are three panels, one is the one of the church, that divides the flashback from the present time, and the two below it shows, one the inside of the church with Tsurumi, Sofia and Asirpa, Tsurumi though completely a dark shadow and the other Asirpa’s face as she heard her father, holding her, made an expression Kiro had never seen on his face.

Asirpa seems happy of hearing this, of hearing his father looked at her with a gentle expression he never had before, her eyes shining and her checks slightly redded.

In a way she’s in the middle of those two men, for Kiro she’s the cause of Wilk’s change, for Tsurumi she represents Wilk’s gain at the expenses of his own loss, as well as the embodiment on Wilk’s will.

The story continues.

The flashback moves forward of some more years.

We’re told that a strange rumor starts being spread, the rumour of the discovery of an old Ainu man who was supposed to have died of smallpox (remember? There was a smallpox epidemic in which Cikapasi’s whole family died), and who was instead living alone in the mountains.

Tsurumi suggests the guy could have been Kimuspu, one of the Ainu who were involved in the attempt to buy weapons from Russia with the gold 50 years before and who, therefore, knows where the gold is.

Tsurumi explains that they too got the same info (though he doesn’t tell them HOW they got it), the image showing him, Kikuta, Usami, Tsukishima and Ogata (hinting how they were all involved in Tsurumi’s Ainu plan) and that they were in the 1902.

Now… a little break here.

The summer of 1902 is the summer in which Tsurumi staged Koito’s kidnapping.

If Asirpa’s dream is reliable Wilk told her his name when it was snowing. Asirpa said that after telling her his name her father went away, implying this was the last time she saw him.

We’ll see Wilk later on in the flashback and his beard is shorter than in Asirpa’s memory.

This might mean that between the discovery of Kimuspu’s body and Wilk’s death time went by. The Ainu aren’t dressed so heavily it suggests we are in winter, but neither so lightly it suggests we’re in summer (Kiro has his undershirt, which he didn’t wear in summer). This means this either happened in spring or in autumn.

We’ll see if the next chapter will tell us more and why when this happened might be relevant… for now let’s just say this seems to hint that Wilk’s death happened in the last months of that year and not in the first.

This, of course, if Asirpa’s dream/memory is reliable.

Anyway, let’s go on.

Kiro continues his narration, telling how this discovery changed the situation radically.

We move then to Noboribetsu where Wilk is having a reunion with 6 more Ainu

Yeah, Noboribetsu is the place where there was the hot spring in which Toni Anji was investigating and Kikuta and Ariko recovering. It’s also the place near which there was Ariko’s village, and it might even be they’re having their reunion in Ariko’s house.

This might also explain what Toni Anji was doing there, that place could have been the place in which Hijikata suspected the gold was hidden, hence he sent Toni to check it. The gold could very well be hidden in the same old mine in which Toni escaped or in a similar one as Ariko said there were others and he went to explore them when he was younger.

It’s entirely possible Hijikata had Boutarou’s same idea but Hijikata found sooner about Noboribetsu and went there to investigate. Maybe he talked to Ariko’s mom and, from her, discovered about Ariko being the son of one of the men involved.

If that’s the case, I’m pleased.

I’ve always wondered WHY Toni Anji was in Noboribetsu as it seemed weird he was there just to investigate on Tsurumi’s men.

But let’s go back to the story and to the conversation Wilk has with the others.

Wilk asks to Siromakur, who’s clearly Ariko’s father if his skin tone, eyes and eyebrows are meant to be taken as a reference, if he couldn’t ask Kimuspu the location of the gold.

So Ariko’s dad is the one who met met Kimuspu.

Now, remember how I said Tsurumi didn’t say how he got info about Kimuspu?

In hindsight this makes me wonder if Tsurumi has a man among the Ainu because if a rumour about this Ainu man being found spread, it should have spread among Ainu, not Wajin. They should have known him, known he was involved with the gold and known he was assumed to have died of smallpox.

Those aren’t info they would have shared with the Wajins.

Whatever, let’s go on.

Siromakur says the man didn’t want to talk with him so another Ainu, Mesira, suggests they should track him down and 'convince’ him to talk.

This worries me because it implies they might end up being forceful with him.

Sure, partisans in all the countries, despite claiming to stand with the local population, hardly had qualms in forcing the population to cooperate should they decide they didn’t want to align with the partisans’ wishes... and partisans are fighting a war, a war with different means but always a war and wars are dirty things but... but it always rubbed me the wrong way because while soldiers go at war merely because they obey orders, partisans claim they chose to go at war for ideals that include protecting people...

...and then sacrifice the people they wanted to protect.

It kind of reminds me of a dark joke popular in my country about this kind of people.

“Against violence, bullying, suffering we must all be united... and if someone doesn’t agree, we'll kill him.”

...because yeah, when they said they’re against violence they were talking of violence perpetrated by OTHER PEOPLE, they’re completely in favour of violence perpetrated by them...

Sukuta wonders if someone else, apart the 7 of them, knows about Kimuspu. As Irenka, another Ainu who so far hadn’t spoken, looks at Siromakur, the latter admits he talked about it with several people but didn't tell them where Kimuspu was.

Great move, Ariko’s dad, now we know who might have spread the rumour until it reached Tsurumi’s (and Kiro’s) ears. -_-

Do you want the news to be reported on newspapers too?

Just to make sure everyone knows....

Ratci, who seems to be the older among them and therefore the only one who has a chance to be the older brother of the old Ainu Boutarou met since the guy was supposedly one of those who died in the incident, comments Kimuspu was living deep in the mountains without anyone knowing, so he couldn't be found easily.

Oskeporo, who somehow reminds me of Kirawus, although his eyebrows looks more like Cikapasi’s, comments they too could have problems tracking Kimuspu.

Siromakur tells them he knows where he sets his arrow traps so they can wait him there. At this they decide to go find Kimuspu before others will track him down.

It’s clear they’re searching the old guy because they’re interested in the gold.

However, as they’re about to leave, Kiro shows up and demands explanations from Wilk. He’s clearly angry if his expression, his tone of voice and his clenched fists can be taken as a hint, and wants to know why Wilk hadn’t called him.

Did Ariko’s dad tattled out the discovery of Kimuspu to Kiro as well?

Great move, Ariko’s dad, really. -_-

What about informing Russia about it as well now?

They might want to know too...

Wilk tell the other Ainu to go ahead. As he does so, in his same panel we can see Ariko’s father and Mesira, who was the guy who wanted them to ‘convince’ Kimuspu to talk. They seem to accept it.

In another panel we see Sukuta and Osikepor. Sukuta seems just worried, Osikepor is clearly not pleased, a frown on his face but all he says is a line of dots.

Once they’re alone Kiro again, loudly demands some explanation and Wilk informs him he has decided they need to change plans, that his Far East Federation would be too wide to protect from Russia if they were to count on minorities alone, but if they were to make only Hokkaido, which is encircled by the sea, independent, they could manage it.

Now, please, let me facepalm.

Yeah, an island is a bit easier to protect than the huge land Wilk originally planned to involve, part of which was attached to Russia, but not that much it makes it an inexpugnable fortress.

The Far East Federation was a pure utopia but this is really no that much better.

They would then need to find another Russian captain willing to sell them weapons and warships, get some Ainu who know how to handle them all, chase away the 7th division who, by then is residing in Hokkaido along with all those military settlers who has stopped serving the army, beat the Ominato fleet and then whatever fleet Japan would send against them.

In case Japan were to give up on re-conquering Hokkaido they would have then hope that Russia wouldn’t try to do it or wouldn’t join forces with Japan in exchange for some compensations. Or that China wouldn’t lend a hand in place of Russia in exchange for compensations.

In short, yeah, you’ve less land to defend and it’s a little harder to get there but not by much considering how Kiro’s group could even cross the La Pérouse Strait on a small boat and Asirpa did it by walking on drift ice.

We’ve no info on how the Tsugaru strait was crossed back then but it’s half than the La Pérouse Strait, so Hokkaido can be attacked easily by two points and with a little more work as it would require a longer boat trip, from other points as Hokkaido’s coast is approximately 4,183 kilometres which is quite a bit to guard.

Islands had been conqueered through all the centuries, it’s not like the thing is unprecendented so really, Hokkaido might be slightly more difficult to attack but it’s not such a stronghold Wilk can hope to defend it with his meagre forces.

Of course things would be slightly different if Wilk were to plan to join hands with Tsurumi who, in that same year, managed to have Koito Heiji indebted to him and who has professional soldiers under him.

If Wilk’s state and Tsurumi’s state were to overlap this would provide them more tactical advantages. This, assuming Tsurumi wouldn’t, once he got control of the gold, kick the Ainu out of the deal.

But we don’t know if Wilk and Tsurumi know each other is in Hokkaido and, at this point, I’m not sure these two chessmasters would shake hands in an allegiance.

Anyway Kiro’s furious at the new plan.

We jump back into the present where Tsurumi explains to Asirpa the benefits of Wilk’s plan… or better how his plan diverged from the one of Sofia and Kiro’s which is something that would end up promoting discord between Wilk and his own allies.

(It’s also worth to remember that Sofia in truth wasn’t a partisan, she was a revolutionary who cared about the Russian population. Hokkaido Ainu are considered Japanese so it’s unlikely she would be interested in them. Wilk’s plan basically meant he will let her to her own devices... great way to handle your allies Wilk.)

Tsurumi claims he understands Wilk’s plan, and of course he does as he plans to do the same but Tsurumi is much better organized, with better men, connections, inside knowledge, trusted allies and back up plans to support his country so Tsurumi’s chances of success are WAY HIGHER than Wilk, despite his plan remaining very hard to pursue successfully.

Meanwhile we go back to the flashback.

Predictably Kiro sees Wilk’s idea as a betrayal. Wilk came up with such plan without discussing it with him or Sofia and it’s a plan that is not beneficial to the other minorities, the minorities to whom Kiro belongs or has grown to care about who live in Karafuto or in Russia, just to the Hokkaido Ainu.

Wilk says according to him they should migrate in Hokkaido and he would be willing to welcome them there, which again, is naïve.

For start he’s not the ruler of Hokkaido. The migrants might end up being seen by the Hokkaido population as no better than the Wajin, never mentioning he’s just asking to all those people to leave their lands and move there.

It’s similar to Hijikata’s plan but Hijikata at least didn’t have to really care for the migrants he wanted to welcome, nor for their living style. For him they were just an usable commodity. Wilk should care about them instead and yet he’s not.

Still, I love how cleverly this page is constructed.

We’ve three panels.

The two above show Kiro and Wilk and their contrasting positions.

The visual pins them as contrasting in every possible way, Kiro is angry, Wilk is calm, Kiro is seen frontally, Wilk from behind. With their images Noda is setting up the premise for the fight between them that will follow.

The line that divides the two panels might as well be the fracture between them.

On the bottom we see Kiro’s reaction to Wilk’s world. Wilk’s words only upset Kiro further.

It’s meaningful how we see only the top of his head, his hands holding it, everything shaded by a swirling shade, hinting at the many thoughts that should infest Kiro’s mind in that moment.

It gives me the feeling Kiro feels his world too is wirling and he’s desperately trying to keep it together, to make sense of it and can’t.

Wilk is the person he loved, trusted and admired the most and now Wilk comes out with... this? How is that even possible?

Kiro reminds Wilk of how his birth village disappeared and his people died due to them being forced to leave the land.

Wilk is unaffected by this, he’s sure since they know why the first time things went wrong, they wouldn’t make mistakes this time.

Sure, failed immigration attempts plague us in moder times as well but Wilk would have managed to magically solve them all, Wilk could do everything better, Wilk knows.

WILK CAN YOU PLEASE COME BACK DOWN ON PLANET EARTH FOR A CHANGE? YOU AREN’T THE GOD OF A BRAVE NEW WORLD, YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO SOLVE IT! YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO MANAGE YOUR LITTLE REBELLION OR HOLD CLOSE YOUR ALLIES OR PERSUADE THEM YOU’RE RIGHT! EITHER YOU’VE A SECRET BACK UP PLAN OR HOW YOU’LL SAY TO KIRO YOU’LL ACCOMPLISH IS BEYOND DUMB AND NAIVE! PLEASE, STOP!

Ahem... okay, back with the story.

Kiro then points out how the Uilta wouldn’t be able to continue their lifestyle as Hokkaido is too warm to keep reindeers so they can’t protect their culture in Hokkaido.

Wilk waves the problem off, saying they would accept only who wants to move there.

In short if the Uilta don’t want to move because this would mean to change their lifestyle… well, their problem.

So yes, it’s a betrayal of their cause, their cause that was about protecting all those minorities and their lifestiles.

Wilk belonged to a group, a group who wanted to take care of all those minorities. He can’t just arbitrarily decide that some of them don’t matter and it’s their problem.

It would be different if he had said ‘let’s fix the Hokkaido Ainu, let’s start from here and then spread, we can’t help the Uilta RIGHT NOW, but once we’ve consolidate our forces we will, we’re postponing, not giving up.’

Instead he’s giving up.

He should have talked with the others, he should have proposed Hokkaido as a starting point, not as the solution. Let’s free Hokkaido, strengthen our defences there and then move to free the rest... as Tsurumi is planning to do.

For Tsurumi is first Hokkaido then Vladivostok.

For Wilk it could have been first Hokkaido then Karafuto, then the rest. A step at time.

It was still an utopia but it wouldn’t be betrayal of his teammates and they could have accepted it. It would have made sense.

Instead Wilk didn’t discuss things, he just decided them behind his companions’ back without talking with them because he’s Wilk and knows what’s better to do.

Really, I see a lot of parallels with Sugimoto because I’m sure Wilk too is persuaded he meant well... but he’s actually deciding things arbitrarily for others, looking more at his own advantage than at theirs.

Kiro accuses him of not caring about the Russian minorities because Wilk’s goal is now merely to protect his daughter’s future as she’s an Hokkaido Ainu.

Wilk insists his method is just the most realistic.

This part is again well constructed as it again represent the split between them.

Below the image of Wilk saying that only who wants to immigrate should do it we’ve on one side a panel with Kiro, accusing Wilk of selfishly caring only about Asirpa.

On the other we’ve two panels, one of Asirpa and one of Wilk, Asirpa’s panel taking most of the space.

Although Wilk insists he’s taking the most realistic path, it’s clear Asirpa weightens a lot on his decision... and in the future Asirpa is there to listen how she ultimately caused the division between those two friends just by... existing.

At this point though, the discussion takes a really ugly turn.

Kiro, who back then likely wasn’t married yet, remarks that it’s Hokkaido who actually has nothing to do with them, and that Wilk is caring about it merely because he now has a lovely family there.

The page is split in two. On one panel there’s Kiro and Wilk, this time together, on the other there’s Asirpa who’s ‘listening’ to the discussion they’re having, who’s called to hear of their actions and judge them.

And we make a break because we’ve a problem here and I wonder if Asirpa has caught up with it as well.

I stand by Kiro when he says Wilk’s plan is a betrayal of the other minorities and of his companions and therefore a pretty dirty move.

But they were planning to buy their freedom by using the Hokkaido Ainu gold. Now, unless they planned to steal from them, the Hokkaido Ainu should have mattered as well, they have something to do with them, they’re a minority too who deserves to be protected and of whom they wanted to use the resources and the support.

Hokkaido has everything to do with them if they want to involve it in their war and not just profit from it... which probably was exactly what they, deep down, meant to do since both Kiro and Wilk didn’t come to Hokkaido with the most honest intentions but disguised themselves among its people to try and find info about the gold.

So the discussion reveals that below those men’s oh so pure ideals, there’s something else, something else that’s not pure and selfless at all.

Self interest.

And Trurumi translates this in words for Asirpa.

Right from the start both Kiro and Wilk had two goals.

One was the noble one they presented to the world, protect the minorities.

The other was the more human one, protect whose they loved.

More often than not, expecially when interacting with a story, people tend to think other people/characters are moved solely by ONE SINGLE GOAL.

That’s not really true, people is usually moved by multiple goals.

both goals existed in both Kiro and Wilk but they presented to the world only one, the noble one, and kept the other hidden in their heart.

That’s because the world could understand and support the noble goal but would scoff at the other goal... yet the other goal is probably much more important to them than the other one.

In fact things are breaking among them EXACTLY due to that other goal being denied.

Their priority is that other goal, the noble goal exists... but comes second best and will never come first.

Tsurumi’s words reflect his own situation as well.

He too has a noble goal, to conqueer Hokkaido for the men of the 7th... a goal that to him is real and that he wants to reach... but he also has a much more private goal, which is tied to the loss of his family.

The existance of this goal doesn’t deny the existance of the previous goal. They both exists, it’s just he presents only one because only one would be considered acceptable and give him support... and also because the other is personal, private.

Something that holds in his heart but doesn’t dare to voice.

Tsukishima, outside of the room, hear all this and is impressed (we can see that on his face there aren’t anymore signs of anger) as he likely understood this can be applied to Tsurumi as well.

Tsukishima has naively believed Tsurumi has to have only one single goal, either he was fighting for the men of the 7th or he was fighting due to his own family but that’s not the case.

Tsurumi can as well fight both for creating a military state in Hokkaido for the men of the 7th but also for the people he loved and while the people he loved would be his main motive this wouldn’t make his second reason untrue.

Kiro, in an agry and distraught face reminds Wilk of how Sofia is still waiting for them in Russia, before attacking Wilk, who fight him back.

While back then it was all about what moved Wilk, now this page is all about what moves Kiro. He loved Sofia, not just the minorities.

He can’t bear the idea to sacrifice her, he’ll fight for her.

For her he’ll fight Wilk whom he admired and loved so much.

Asirpa understands all this.

While his father wanted to protect the minorities but, ultimately, prioritized her, Kiro too loved and wanted to protect the minorities, he was angry on their behalf but, more than everything, he loved and wanted to protect Sofia, Sofia, who was the last word he said before dying.

She explains Kiro’s feelings to Sofia and it’s so terribly sad to think back at how Kiro killed Wilk for her, because Wilk would just dump her and yet Sofia was still so in love with him when she met Kiro again she slapped him because he killed Wilk.

The pain Kiro should have felt in that moment... he just took the slap and didn’t counter, didn’t say anything. He killed Wilk FOR HER, it hurts him to kill Wilk and yet he couldn’t tell any of this...

... and, at the same time, he didn’t regret any of this. For her he would kill Wilk all over again.

Meanwhile, in the flashback we can see that the winner of the fight is Wilk... which was predictable enough, not because we knew Wilk was the better fighter (we didn’t) but because Kiro attacked him in blind rage, while Wilk managed to stay calm and, apparently, catch him in a strangle hold, suffucating him and causing him to lose consciousness.

That’s why Wilk walks away all bruised while Kiro, despite ending up on the ground, seems in better conditions.

Asirpa suggests her father might not have said the truth to Kiro because he knew Kiro loved Sofia.

It makes sense but it’s not a great justification because it’s the admission Wilk knew he was betraing them.

Kiro was allied with Wilk for a reason, Wilk knew that reason and so he tried to do things behind Kiro’s back because he wasn’t going to respect the deal he had with Kiro and Sofia, knowing Kiro wouldn’t agree to it.

Now... okay, as I said before it’s possible that Wilk is actually in an alliance with Tsurumi as well, or that he suspects Tsurumi has spies in his group so he’s serving Kiro a fake story but let’s assume he’s being sincere.

Wilk might claim and claim this is more rational, and maybe he even believes he’s doing all this because it’s more rational and not for his daughter, maybe he’s in denial about his own true reason so really, he thinks he’s choosing the best option... but the fact he knew Kiro wouldn’t accept it, hints at how deep down Wilk should have known it was betrayal.

Yet, it’s still possible Wilk wasn’t consciously aware of it, that he was lying even to himself.

We’ve seen this kind of betrayals through the story, with the character doing the deed not realizing he was betraying the other party but thinking he was picking up the best option for everyone.

Sugimoto sold Asirpa to Tsurumi, demanding money solely for himself and not caring about Shiraishi’s fate. By doing so HE BELIEVED he was protecting Asirpa (he wasn’t) and that Shiraishi should have just spontaneously given up to his own share of gold. Sugimoto could have realized this, but he preferred to think he was doing the right thing for everyone.

Asirpa decided to join forces with Hijikata because she believed it would be a better option for them. By doing so SHE BELIEVED she was chosing the better option for everyone as an alliance would give them more chances of success and Hijikata has a better future in mind, but in truth she basically demanded from Boutarou to give up on his goal as Hijikata’s goal and Boutarou’s are mutually exclusive. Asirpa could have realized this (though I tend to give her a pass because she’s young but really, Boutarou pointed out he wanted to fulfill his goal too many times to miss it, and even if she still were due to her young age, Sugimoto and Shiraishi should have realized and give her a head up), but he preferred to think he was doing the right thing for everyone.

Tsukishima, for most of the story, is not fighting Tsurumi’s orders but just agreeing with Tsurumi’s methods of deception of the other characters, because HE BELIEVED they will lead everyone to be saved. Practically he’s lying to Koito and denying Tanigaki the chance to opt out, attempting to force everyone in the 7th to betray Central. Tsukishima could have realized this, but he preferred to think he was doing the right thing for everyone.

Long story short those people didn’t see their behaviour as betrayal but as pursuing the better option for themselves and the others, expecting the others to just agree with them.

Wilk’s behaviour, the fact he insists he’s picking up the better option as if he’s trying to persuade himself more than Kiro, reminds me of them, of people who were stubbornly thinking they were doing the right thing, they were picking the best option, when they actually were walking all over their friends, neglecting them and their goals in favour of a goal they prioritized.

But, back to the story, as soon as Asirpa tells Sofia that Kiro’s problem was that he loved Sofia so he couldn’t just leave her behind, Sofia lowers her head, her eyes wet.

She loved Wilk... but, in her own way she loved Kiro also, whom she saw as a little brother. It should pain her greatly to know in the end she was the reason that pushed Kiro to kill Wilk, that caused the split between them... even if this isn’t all true. As said, the goal to protect the minorities still existed in Kiro... but Sofia was the drop that broke the camel's back.

Also I get Asirpa meant well, she wants to deliver Kiro’s feelings and, at the same time, defend her father’s actions but that wasn’t probably the best moment to deliver Kiro’s feelings since Sofia was already shaken by how she was facing Tsurumi/Hasegawa... as for defending Wilk’s actions... honestly she only end up as painting him as calculative.

Because Wilk knew Kiro wouldn’t have agreed with his plan, he worked behind his back. I’m not sure Asirpa realizes though, she likely is buying the narrative in which Wilk’s choice was mainly for the greater good as well as her, while the order of the things was completely reverse and the plan was so dumb I can’t believe Wilk came up with it.

Anyway as a battered Wilk walks away we can see a Kiro tied to a tree coming to his sense with a murderous expression on his face.

Kiro sees even the fact Wilk has left him alive as a betrayal, not as of regret that he has actually betrayed his friend and can’t just bear to kill him.

Kiro tells himself the Wilk of the past would have killed Kiro, since Kiro was an obstacle to his purpose. Yet Wilk has left him alive which, to Kiro, proves Wilk has changed and isn’t anymore the Wilk he loved.

This makes me wonder if Kiro actually would have preferred to be killed, if this could have made him swallow the bitter pill Wilk betrayed them, if, in his furious mind, this would have been a proof that Wilk really believed they couldn’t do any better than conquer Hokkaido and then relocate everyone there.

Kiro has said he blindly trusted the old Wilk.

In a way the fact that Wilk, whom he loved and admired so blindly, betrayed their cause and tried to work behind his back should have hurt him terribly. That betrayal is the fall of a hero and, in a sense, Kiro tries to compensate by ‘denying that new Wilk’.

The ‘new’ Wilk is no more the Wilk he loved, therefore he’s no more Wilk, his friend. It makes sense he decided to kill that Wilk, who has turned into a stranger to him, no, worse, into an enemy, an enemy of their cause and an enemy who would sacrifice the people Kiro loved for his own goals.

So, clearly Wilk had to die because he betrayed their cause... but, since we’re talking of people doing things for more than one motive, I wonder if it’s also possible Kiro wanted him destroyed because Wilk wasn’t Wilk anymore, as if the new Wilk killed the old Wilk he loved.

This kind of remind me “The Return of the Jedy”

Luke Skywalker: Ben! Why didn't you tell me? You told me that Darth Vader betrayed and murdered my father.

Obi-Wan: Your father... was seduced by the Dark Side of the Force. He ceased to be the Jedi Anakin Skywalker and "became" the Sith Darth Vader. When that happened, the good man who was your father was destroyed. So, what I told you was true... from a certain point of view.

Luke Skywalker: A certain point of view?

Obi-Wan: Luke, you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view. Anakin was a good friend. When I first met him, your father was already a great pilot. But I was amazed how strongly the Force was with him. I took it upon myself to train him as a Jedi. I thought that I could instruct him just as well as Yoda. I was wrong.

Luke Skywalker: There is still good in him.

Obi-Wan: He's more machine now than man. Twisted and evil.

Luke Skywalker: I can't do it, Ben.

Obi-Wan: You cannot escape your destiny. You must face Darth Vader again.

Luke Skywalker: I can't kill my own father.

Obi-Wan: Then the Emperor has already won. You were our only hope.

Kiro is Obi-Wan, who believes Wilk ceased to be ‘the Wilk he loved’ and became ‘that Wilk’ and when that happened, the good man who was Wilk was destroyed so, like Obi-Wan, he thinks ‘that Wilk’ has to be killed (by Luke/Ogata).

Contrary to him, Sofia is more like Luke Skywalker. She didn’t agree with Kiro’s idea they had to kill Wilk and slapped Kiro for what he did.

In all this though, it’s interesting Wilk left Kiro alive.

I’ve mentioned that other situations, similar to this one, happened in the story but this is the first in which the two parties confront each other BEFORE the deed his done. It would be interesting to know if his conversation with Kiro affected him, it made him realize his best option wasn’t so good and so right after all.

Wilk was still in time to change his mind, to go back on being the Wilk Kiro loved... or at least fix his plan so that it would include Kiro’s goals as well hence he might not have wanted to ruin everything by killing Kiro.

Wilk was still in time to try and patch things between them so maybe, albeith he had to leave right then, he left Kiro alive because he wanted to make up, to fix things between them, because he realized he wronged Kiro and didn’t want that.

But well, this is something we’ll discover in the next chapter.

On a sidenote is interesting how Kiro ties the fact that Wilk has changed to Wilk being irrational. The old Wilk was rational, the old Wilk would sacrifice companions because it was rationally the best choice and Kiro believed him.

This new Wilk leave him alive, which is not the best choice, therefore he’s being irrational, he’s being motivated by emotions, therefore even his choice to care only about Hokkaido is motivated merely by emotions, is not rational and shouldn’t be trusted.

It’s surely a convolute mental gimmik but it’s interesting because it’s totally a reasoning a person can do, especially when burning with blind rage... but well, Kiro is being emotional himself and, probably, not even realizing it.

Noda made great characters with them... but their situation is so sad it hurts and even mroe so because we know is hopeless.

Kiro will kill Wilk and will never get to understand his side and neither of them will ever manage to make peace with the other. Such a long friendship ended up in ashes and all for something that should be supposedly positive, the fact they loved someone.

It’s sad.

It’s sad that their friendship ended, it’s sad they didn’t manage to respect each otehr feelings and come up with a solution that would make them both satisfied.

It’s so very sad...

[star-six7]

I’ll Stand Up With You Forever

Andy Biersack x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Word Count: 1461

Request: Can you write an Andy Biersack imagine on a honeymoon?

A/N:  This is my longest one yet! I really enjoyed writing this; if you guys have any more requests for any band listed in my bio, please send them in!

Disclaimer: This is entirely a work of fiction. No part of this story is meant to be libel, slander, or in any way derogatory towards any character’s real life counterpart. I’m not delusional; I know that these characters are simply based off of a public persona and may not actually resemble the people behind those personas. Any additional characters that you do not recognize are entirely fictional, unless otherwise stated. And finally, if you got here by Googling yourself, whatever happens next is 100% on you.

You closed your eyes and sighed happily, settling back into your seat. The flight from Cincinnati to Maui was a long one, and you didn’t want to be jet-lagged all week. Today marked your first full day of being married to one Andrew Dennis Biersack, and it was also going to be the first day of your two-week long honeymoon in Hawaii. Needless to say, you were the happiest you had ever been. You replayed the highlights of your wedding (and the night after) as the plane taxied down the runway, smiling. It was an amazing feeling to know that you had the rest of your life to keep making those kinds of memories with Andy, and you couldn’t wait.

Andy couldn’t wait either, but even more so, he couldn’t wait for the plane to take off. Or land. Or both. He kept leaning over you to peer out the window. You wondered if his legs or his back felt cramped, given his height, but when you opened your eyes, he was grinning.

“What’s up?” You smiled back at him, raising an eyebrow.

“I can’t believe we’re finally married! I can’t believe we’re going on our honeymoon. Can you believe it? I can’t.”

You laughed quietly at his enthusiasm, glancing down at your own wedding band. “Are you sure you don’t want the window seat?” You asked him, gesturing at the setting sun.

“Why would I need the window seat when the best view is sitting right next to me?” He smirked.

You blushed, slightly giddy that he still managed to take your breath away after all these years. “Thank you,” you mumbled. “I’m gonna try and sleep now, okay? I wanna be awake for at least some of our honeymoon.”

“So… we’re not joining the Mile High Club?”

You groaned and covered your face with the in-flight magazine.

“Come on babe, don’t you want to get with an extremely handsome rockstar?” He winked exaggeratedly.

“Actually, yes, do you know any?” You lowered the magazine and grinned at him.

“I’m hurt,” he said, feigning disappointment. “But after years of knowing you, I am definitely not shocked.”

“Well,” you said, leaning your head back against the seat, eyes closed. “Go to sleep. We have the rest of our lives to try again.”

---

After twelve hours and some change, the plane touched down. You had managed to get a decent amount of sleep, even with Andy’s fidgeting and restlessness. However, taking off during a sunset and landing half a day later during the same one due to the time zones was enough to throw off anybody’s internal clock, and therefore, make them a bit grumpy.

You frowned as Andy led you to the rental car, luggage in tow. “Can’t we just check in at the hotel and go to bed? My body is telling me it’s six am!”

“Nope!” he said, grinning far too brightly for someone who hadn’t slept in almost twenty-four hours. “Can’t get off schedule!”

You sighed as he kissed your cheek and started humming lightly as he drove. While you had taken care of most of the smaller details of your actual wedding and reception, Andy had been in charge of the honeymoon. You had both decided on a destination, and you had given your input on some of the activities you were looking forward to (at least, those that took place outside of the bedroom), but Andy did the bulk of the work as far as making reservations and planning an itinerary. And Andy loved planning itineraries. 

Every trip you had gone on as a couple, Andy had meticulously outlined every day of it, almost down to every hour. This could be both a blessing and a curse, because while it was nice to have a plan, Andy was pretty insistent on sticking to it. You had joked before that he should plan the mission timelines for NASA. He just laughed and said that years of being in a far-traveling, highly successful rock band following a strict tour schedule had drilled it into him, and besides you were stuck with him, weren’t you? Yes, you thought now, looking back down at the ring on your finger, you were stuck with him, and you couldn’t be happier.

The jolt of Andy putting the car into park snapped you out of your reminiscing, as you looked around, taking in the restaurant he had pulled up to.

“Come on, I know this will make you feel better! I looked up the menu a few weeks ago, and I think you’ll love it!”

You just smiled, shaking your head. Of course he did. “You know I love you, right?”

“Of course I do. And you know I love you too.” He put his arm through yours and led you inside.

---

Andy was right, like always. Eating delicious food while looking out over a stunning view of the ocean did wonders to your mood, not to mention simply just talking and laughing with Andy and being with him. Soon, it was time to pick up the check and head back to the hotel.

You had parked in the basement lot of the building, but Andy grabbed your arm when you went to get the suitcases out of the back of the trunk.

“Wait,” he said, a playful look coming across his face. “We should do something first.”

“Huh? What about the schedule?” You edged out of his grasp. “I’m still in my plane clothes. And besides, don’t you wanna do something in our room?” You added a note of flirtation in your voice.

“No, it’s- I mean, yes! Yes, I wanna do bedroom activities, but-” And then he grabbed your hand and started sprinting towards the exit.

“Andy, what-” you tried, stumbling to keep up.

He just laughed and stopped to pick you up and swing you over his shoulder. “You’re too slow, come on!”

By this point, the sun had set over the island, but Andy navigated the dark path through the hotel grounds with ease. He skittered sideways through an open gate and down a sandy concrete walkway towards what you realized was the beach.

“Andrew! You better not be planning on throwing me in the water or I swear-”

“Good idea,” he laughed, “but no. You should take off your shoes.” He set you down on the sand.

You complied, as he did the same, and then you waded out into the surf with him. You watched Andy as he immediately began searching for shells to give you, knowing how much you loved to collect them. All of a sudden, the entirety of the past few days started to catch up with you all at once. While there wasn’t any scientific proof of fate, or soulmates, or anything like that, you couldn’t help but feel like every decision, every event, in both your life and Andy’s had led you to this exact moment. Standing knee deep in water, alone on the beach at night, with the moon shining down on the two of you as you tried not to get soaked by the incoming tide. Every disappointment and roadblock you had experienced snapped into place, and now you could appreciate them for where they had gotten you. You admired the way the moonlight glinted off Andy’s smile, the way his arms had felt around you moments ago, and the way his laugh sounded over the waves. You knew that there would certainly be more challenges in the course of your life, but you knew you could get through them with someone as kind, talented, smart, beautiful, and loving as Andy by your side.

Suddenly, you were pulled back into reality by the shock of ocean water down your front. Whirling to your right, you saw Andy standing next to you with the most see-through attempt of a look of innocence on his face. However, you couldn’t find it in you to pretend to be annoyed.

“Hey, so, if you missed it the first five times, I found you a-”

“Andy.” You cut him off. “Um. I know I only said it a million times yesterday, but… I really love you. And I’m so glad you’re in my life, forever now…”

Unwittingly, you felt yourself starting to tear up.

“Hey,” Andy said, moving closer, wrapping his arms around your waist and shoulders. “I know, I love you too, and you complete me. That’s kinda why we got married, remember?”

You chuckled, smiling up at him. “I’m glad that we’re having this moment and everything, but it’s getting cold…”

“You’re right,” he said, taking your hand in his. He glanced wistfully up at the hotel, a sly smile appearing on his face. “Maybe we should go take advantage of the honeymoon suite.”

A/N: Thank you for reading my work! If you enjoyed it, please comment and let me know what you liked about it or what your favorite part was! Also, feel free to send in requests! :)

[kageyuji]

sfw alphabet for Kirishima?

Taglist: @transmantrash @rycbar-221b @squeaky-ducky

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

*pats roof of kirishima* this sweet boi can fit so much love inside

He’s pretty affectionate, although he makes sure to ask before any PDA or the first time he goes to touch you (even if it’s hand holding or a hug)

I can see him burying his face in your neck a lot

He’s a sucker for domestic life, but we’ll get into that later

All in all, he’s pretty affectionate

I feel like his love language is a mix of physical touch and acts of service

Of course, he gives his fair share of the other love languages, but those two just stood out to me

He loves physical affection, he’ll occasionally just pull you into his lap and bury his face into your back/the crook of your neck

And he just kinda wraps his arms around your waist and holds you close

He also loves doing things for you

Like standing up for you, helping you with homework, or getting you gifts

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Sunshine boi

He’s so nice as a best friend?

Like of course he’s nice but the ingredients in a Kirishima is just kindness and adorable obliviousness (is that a word? Idk)

He’s probably one of those people that stay up until midnight so he can be the first one to wish you happy birthday

He’s somewhere between the funny friend and mom friend

Like I can see him having band-aids on hand at all times

And making sure you’re drinking water, eating, and resting when you’re supposed to

But at the same time he’s the friend that makes a joke in most situations

He’s pretty optimistic, so even in battles he’s trying to smile and make you smile, just so you don’t feel discouraged

Kiri would definitely call you at like 4 in the afternoon just to say he missed you and ask if you wanted to hang out

Speaking of hanging out, he’d also FaceTime you or go to your house just to kinda enjoy your company without actually having to talk to each other

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again

Kiri loves cuddles

He is an absolute cuddle monster and no one can convince me otherwise

He doesn’t really care how, he just wants to be close to you and hold you

He especially likes putting his head in your lap and letting you absentmindedly play with his hair

Another favorite is just like,, engulfing you lmao

He likes to hold you against his chest with his arms around you

It makes him feel really manly

Like he can protect you from anything

The Confidence(tm) it gives him

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Absolutely

He’s not one of those ‘trophy wife, white picket fence, 2.5 kids’ guys necessarily

But he’s a sucker for domestic life

in the fact that he likes waking up a little before you and seeing you walking into the kitchen with messy hair, sleepy eyes, and pajamas still on

Kisses, even though neither of you have brushed your teeth yet and you’re half asleep

He’s actually pretty good at cooking

He’s weirdly good at cooking pancakes, I can’t explain why he just is

Blueberry pancakes, chocolate chip pancakes, strawberry pancakes, they’re absolutely perfection whenever he cooks them

He is not that great at cleaning though

He tries, don’t get him wrong, he tries

Kiri also really likes lifting you up off the ground when you hug

Or waking you up with light kisses all over your face

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Honestly I can’t think of a reason why he would break up with them unless it was a matter of their safety/happiness

Or they did something really wrong/the relationship was toxic

But anyway, he’d go about it really cautiously

Because like I said, he wouldn’t do it because he lost feelings or something, he would still probably love you and not want to break your heart

Even if you broke his heart

So he’s gonna sit you down at a time when he knows you’re in the right headspace

He’d politely explain to you why, trying to phrase it the best way he knew how to

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

I’m gonna be honest he’s ready for commitment pretty early on into the relationship

He gets attached pretty quickly, and when he does he gets insanely attached

But if he doesn’t feel like you’re 100% ready he won’t ask for your hand, and even after he does think so he’ll wait a long while just because he doesn’t want to rush anything

He has no problems with commitment, he likes feeling like he belongs somewhere

It makes him feel wanted in the same way he wants to be close to you all the time

He would die if you called him your husband/fiancé

Also, he calls you mr/mx/mrs Kirishima all the time and the smile on his face will not fade for the next few hours

After you agree to marry him, he wants to schedule the wedding as soon as possible

Obviously, he doesn’t want you to feel like he’s rushing things, but he’s just so happy that you wanted to actually marry him

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He’s gentle both physically and emotionally

Well, he tries to be physically gentle

He sometimes forgets his own strength or accidently turns his hand or something hard

But mostly he’s pretty gentle

and if he does hurt something/someone, he always makes sure to apologize and help fix whatever damage he’d done

And he feels so bad about it, the poor sweet babie

I can’t see him being rude to anyone, like ever lmao

I mean, you saw him feel bad for the guy who was trying to attack him in that one episode right?

Emotionally, he is very gentle

He’s very sweet, always offering his S/O compliments and doing sweet little things for them

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

The man loves hugs ok

And you know he gives good hugs

Like the ones where you’re kind of trapped in his embrace but it’s not like you’re complaining because you just feel so safe

But if he’s excited or hasn’t seen you in a while, it’s bone crushing

^^ He sometimes forgets his own strength, and therefore hugs just a little too tight when he isn’t paying attention

Also, he picks you up to hug you during those instances

He hugs...a reason amount?

Wait what’s a reasonable amount I’m touch starved

Like it’s not like he is hugging you every few minutes, but it’s not like he never hugs you

Maybe once when he first sees you, or when the two of you are parting ways

And he also hugs for comfort, but we been knew

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Oh, he says it the second he knows for sure

Although, it might be at a seemingly random time

Like you’ve just cracked some dumb joke and it suddenly hits him

And he just kind of blurts it out whether you two are alone in the room or not

Or maybe he can’t sleep one night, his mind is running crazy, and he realizes he can’t sleep because he’s thinking about you

And he texts you at 2 AM to tell you because for him it’s so important that you know in that instant

He doesn’t even care if you’re awake to respond, he needed to say it before he could sleep

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He gets a more insecure type of jealous

And he hates that he gets like that

Because he trust you and he wants you to know that

So for him to feel jealous makes him feel like he’s saying he doesn’t trust you; when, in fact, he trust you with his life.

When he does get jealous, you’ll know

He ask you if you think he’s manly enough for you

When he’s jealous, he always has his arms wrapped around you, holding you closely against himself

He tries to convince himself he doesn’t need to feel jealous of the other person because...you don’t like them, do you?

He usually ends up failing in convincing himself and winds up not-so-subtlety trying to get you away from the person.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Kirishima’s kisses are always full of passion

His hand are always somewhere on you

Whether that be your waist, your back, your face, he just needs to be holding you

Usually, it’s just pecks on the tip of your nose or your forehead

But whenever he sees you for the first time in a while, after arguments, run-ins with villains, and similar circumstances his kisses are full of passion and longing

Also, he likes when you kiss his shoulders? I don’t even know why, he just loves it

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Kids loves him

They think him and his quirk are so cool!

And plus he’s really gentle and sweet with them

He shows off a lot infront of them because he’s trying to impress them

He talks to them a lot, telling them all about his hero work and how he used to have absolutely no control over his quirk

It’s a lot encouragement towards them

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

He usually wakes up a little after the sun, not too early but not too late.

If you’re asleep, he won’t wake you up, he knows you probably need the sleep

Instead he’ll go cook you breakfast and bring you some in bed

If you wake up before him, please for the love of all things holy, wake him up with light kisses all over his face

He would die of fluff overload

Once both of you are awake, he pulls you against his chest and sits there until he can wake up mentally

Ok but can you imagine tired, shirtless standing in the kitchen sipping coffee?? That’s my sexuality

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

He’s the type that falls asleep on the couch watching TV

So he doesn’t actually go to bed until like midnight

He’s the type to get up at like 2 am to get some food or something and you think there is someone stealing lmao

He’s always holding you in some way when you’re sleeping, even if he just has his leg barely pressed against yours

Although he would much rather be cuddling with you

He takes night showers, so can we just take a moment to appreciate Kirishima with his hair wet

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Kirishima’s not the type to say everything all at once

But I also can’t see him being the type that just randomly mentions things and leaves you sitting there like ‘?’

He probably does it pretty early on in the relationship, or if you were friends first he starts mentioning stuff a month or two into the friendship

He mentions it slowly, not wanting to scare you away

Although, he is a pretty open person so there are some things you’ll be able to figure out right off the bat

He’s not very secretive with you, especially not after he opens up to you

So any fights you may have definitely aren’t because he’s hiding things from you

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Not very

He may get frustrated with himself a fair amount

But he doesn’t get very angered at other people very often

He’d much rather talk about what’s bothering him than argue or keep things bottled up, but he usually doesn’t have many problems with people

He would gladly take his time with anyone who asked for his help instead of getting impatient and starting to yell like other people might *cough* bakugou

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He remembers a fair amount

Obviously he can’t remember everything you say

He does remember random little things you say, though

Like sometimes he might get you a plushie of your favorite animal that you might have mentioned you liked once.

It’s little sweet things like that

And obviously he remembers the important things about you, like your birthday or what you’d like to do once you graduate

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

He remembers how a few months after you two started dating, he saw you were wearing his hoodie

It was actually a Crimson Riot hoodie, he’d had it for a while but he loved it

Of course, you knew how much Kirishima admired Crimson Riot

So you assumed he was smiling because the hoodie had been buried in his closet for who knows how long and he was seeing it for the first time in a while

“I like the hoodie, where’d you get it?” He joked, sitting down besides you

You just smiled and leaned on his shoulder

“Ya know, Kiri, I like it. But I think I’d like it a little more if it said ‘Red Riot’.”

His heart fluttered, you’d always supported him when im came to his dream to become a hero

But still, to hear you say that, it made him so happy

And he couldn’t deny that it made him fall just a little more in love with you

No, Kirishima could not function properly for the rest of the day

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Kirishima is protective of you but not in the “I’m not letting another man around you ever, you are not allowed to have friends, Nope” kind of way

It’s more of an “I just want you to be safe” kind of way

So he’s always there make sure you’re safe, he doesn’t know how he would be able to forgive himself if he couldn’t save you from something

Especially if you have anxiety, he wants to be there to ground you, to be the reason maybe your anxiety isn’t so bad

He actually doesn’t like being protected himself, though

Apparently it “isn’t manly” so he’ll always insist that he doesn’t need help

Even though he usually does

He needs more of an emotional type of protection, if that makes sense?

He justs needs someone there to hold him and tell him that everything is gonna be ok

Or really just someone to talk to, you don’t even have to listen

Because lets face it, he has a lot of insecurities from when he was bullied in middle school

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Ok so he’s not the type to plan big, extravagant parties and stuff for you

But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t put a lot of time and effort into his gifts

He remembers what you like, what you don’t like

He take notes of all the little things, if that makes sense

He remembers your favorite flowers, your favorite animal, your favorite everything

He also remembers your favorite places, where you went on your first date, where you first met, where you had your first kiss, places like that.

So usually any time you have an an aniversary it’s at a special place

Also, he’s more of a pleaser than someone that likes to be pleased, so he does a lot of stuff for you

Like he’ll get you gifts just because he wanted to see a smile on your face

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He says “manly” a lot

He doesn’t have many, to be honest

If anything, it’s that he’d break himself before he gives up

Especially when it comes to you

He would use his last breath trying to protect you

Which can be an issue for you, you just want him to be safe

And then there’re goes, losing sleep trying to do things for you

When in reality the only thing you want from him is for him to be healthy and happy

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He doesn’t mean to be

In fact he hates that he is

But after being bullied so much in middle school, he can’t help but feel a little insecure from time to time

Which is why he dyed his hair, started working out

That’s not to say that he’s vane about it, he doesn’t brag and think that he’s better than other people

But he isn’t as self conscious as he used to be, and especially not now that he has you at his side

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

No, he couldnt feel whole without you, not now that he knows what it feels like to have someone always there for him

He loves that he has someone to rely on so fully

And to suddenly not have that person there for him, to not have an anchor of sorts, there is n way he could feel completed again

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

This man has literally walked into the store with a whole ass grocery list, saw something that you might like or reminded him of you, bought it and forget about everything else he was supposed to get

He rushed home just to give you the little gift he had gotten you

It was not the first or the last time it had happened

Honestly just anytime he gets to bring a smile to your face is a good day for him

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He’s not a fan of someone who is picky

Like obviously you can have opinions, but he wouldn’t like someone who judges him, if that makes sense

He just doesn’t want to feel insecure

And I feel like if he was with someone who was in any way judgemental, he would be an insecure wreck constantly

Basically, he just wants someone who is open-minded

But he doesn’t really care about many other things

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Like I said before, he goes to bed at around midnight but falls asleep on the couch at like 10

But anyway

He’s a pretty deep sleeper, he has slept through a few bad storms in his life

He drools a lot. And also he snores a lot. Babie boi

He has an unreasonable amount of weird dreams but he only remembers like 2% of them

You know they happen though because he also talks in his sleep occasionally, and when he wakes up you’re just like “Kiri?? Why were you talking about overthrowing your ant overlords last night?”

No one knows

This man cannot keep the bed sheets straight in any sort of way, he he goes to sleep in the fetal position and wakes up laying horizontally at the foot of the bed

[hypnofur1]

Out For Delivery in Dallas

By Hypnofur

Mid February 2021

The irony was, none of the three beings in this tale had lived in Dallas for more than a month. Brittany and Timothy Cosgrove had just purchased their expensive condo on the North side of Dallas in January. Carlos Torres had been living in El Paso Texas for a very long time, and had just recently come to the Dallas area.

None of them, actually no one in all of Texas, expected the winter blast they got in mid February. The entire state was a disaster. Texans just didn’t know how to handle winter weather. Brittany and Timothy had just moved here from Indianapolis, so to them, this wasn’t even that bad a winter storm. However, agreeing to the purchase of matching his and her’s Corvettes was part of the Brittany’s compromise to get her husband to agree to move to Dallas. Brittany had just gotten a job with one of the DFW area’s top hospitals as their chief nutritionist. More importantly, she had struck a deal with the ABC affiliate to be their on air Nutrition expert. Brittany’s ultimate goal was to parlay her beauty, and nutrition expertise, into a gig on the national scene. Good Morning America or something.

Timothy knew this, and he loved Brittany very much. He would have moved to Dallas without the Corvette deal, as he knew it was a much bigger media market than Indy. However, he was an attorney, and it was in his DNA to negotiate. Thus, the two corvettes. He of course didn’t know it was going to snow here in Texas, thus, he didn’t really care much that his luxury condo was on one of the few hills in Dallas. Corvettes did not go up hill in the snow very well.

It was about 6:00 when Brittany forced Timothy to watch the #freebrittany documentary with her on FX. She was always fascinated with Brittany Spears, due to them having the same name and being about the same age. Timothy agreed to watch it, as he had been hogging the TV with sports for a few days now. By the time the show was over, it was like 7:30, and both were starving.

Each of the young urban professionals scanned their phones for some place that would deliver. But between the weather and power outages all around, there were no good restaurants that were options. The only place open was a McDonalds two blocks away.

“No way!” Brittany laughed. “Tim, I haven’t been to a McDonalds in like 11 years. I’m not starting tonight. I’ll starve first thanks.”

“OK, but I don’t want to. Come with me, you can at least get a salad. They have those.” Tim negotiated.

“Do you know what is in those???” Brittany said, then stopped herself. She had learned a while ago that people didn’t like when she annoyingly listed all of the bad ingredients in food. “Argh, ok. I’ll take a walk with you there.” She relented with a smile.

Once there, she remembered how much she loved Orange Soda. Tim smiled, but didn’t tease her about it. She appreciated that. She actually hated being teased. She snuggled up to him as they walked out of the McDonalds and headed back to their condo through the snowy mess.

Carlos was also very hungry on this winter night. He was miserable, he absolutely hated the cold. Born in Mexico, and then spending a tremendous amount of time in El Paso, he had never had to deal with cold and snow like this. He wished he was back in Mexico this evening. Carlos’ move to Dallas wasn’t based on career advancement though, it was based on Covid-19 vaccinations. More specifically, the blood of humans who had been vaccinated.

This past year had been the worst of Carlos’ 209 on this earth. The last 150 in El Paso had been wonderful. Feeding on the blood of Mexican immigrants who crossed the border with little identification. Knowing that the secretive nature of the illegal immigrant community would stop any real deep inquisitions into mysterious deaths. It was also nice and warm. It was the perfect place for the vampire.

However, Covid-19 changed all that. Feasting on the blood of a human with Covid made him incredibly sick, for weeks at a time. Over and over everytime he bit someone with the disease. He eventually learned how to smell Covid, but only in humans that had it bad. He, like everyone else, couldn’t detect it in the asymptomatic. Therefore, also like everyone else, he was very pleased when the vaccines started coming out. Much to his pleasure, he could smell the chemicals in vaccinated humans’ blood. He could detect who was vaccinated, and who was not.

That’s why he migrated up to Dallas. People in El Paso were getting the vaccine, but it was largely the elderly. Elderly blood didn’t taste nearly as good as the blood of those in their prime. The large medical community in Dallas meant lots of people in their 20’s and 30’s who had gotten the vaccine as part of the “first responder” roll out.

Brittany and Timothy had both received their shots (both doses) in Indianapolis. Brittany got it because she worked for a hospital, and she was able to get Timothy in because of her connections. As he approached the young urban couple, Carlos could smell the Moderna in them. He had quickly come to love that scent. His mood, which had been quite dour due to the snow and ice and cold, was quickly improving. He thought he’d have a very hard time finding food tonight, but here it was being delivered right to him.

Brittany and Timothy saw the short, somewhat rotund Mexican man approaching them as they were still laughing about McDonalds. Brittany had actually gotten a refill of Orange Soda before they left. They laughed as they joked about cameras seeing them and her soda getting reported to ABC. Carlos was really caught off guard by this weather, and was wearing what would be considered “summer clothes”.

“Look at this poor guy” Timothy said to his wife. While he was a very aggressive, very greedy corporate attorney, he was also very kind and generous. That is one of the reasons Brittany loved him with her whole heart and soul.

“Are you ok my friend?” Timothy asked the man as he and his wife slowly came to a stop on the icy hill to greet the stranger who was coming up it.

“Actually, I’m very hungry and I hate the cold.” the man answered back. Neither Brittany or Timothy immediately noticed that unlike them, when he spoke, there was no steam coming from his mouth on this frigid evening.

“Here, why don’t you take my scarf and some money. There is a McDonalds two blocks North. They are open, we just came from there.” Timothy said, handing the man both his expensive scarf, and $50. Brittany had never loved him more. As she watched with love and admiration as her tall, athletic, handsome husband committed a random act of kindness for a hungry, short, poor, sexy Mexican man.

Wait, why do I find that little guy sexy? Brittany suddenly asked herself. What was it about him? She studied him a little more, and as she did, she felt her pussy actually tingle a bit. God, he was hot. She had never been attracted to Hispanic guys before, especially little short fat ones. What the hell was going on? Why was he so fucking sexy? Brittany was suddenly very glad she had put a cute outfit on and decided to look good going to McDonalds.

“Do you live around here?” Carlos asked Timothy.

“Y-yes” Timothy answered, also oddly affected by the stranger as well.

“Do you own your home?” Carlos asked.

“yes” Timothy confirmed again.

Now Carlos’ mood really improved. Humans knew a lot about Vampire lore, but there were some things that they didn’t truly understand. This was very true surrounding some of the rules of being invited into a home. It could only be done by the true owner of the home. Therefore, renters could not invite a vampire in. Also, another little known fact was that a vampire could hypnotically compel his victim to invite him into their home, but only if the victim was not currently in the home. So, that meant while he couldn’t just knock on a door and get someone to invite him in, these two humans that were “out for delivery” fit the bill just perfect.

“Soy tu Maestra” Carlos said to Timothy, who understood perfectly as he stared back deep into the vampire’s eyes. “Invitame a tu casa”

“Please, won’t you come inside?” Timothy asked.

This was enough to wake Brittany from the light sexual trance she was in. She suddenly felt the coolness of her now damp panties. Wait, Tim shouldn’t invite a stranger into their home… “Tim, hold on…” she said.

“Mirame a los ojos” Carlos said to the Irish Scotish Italian American beauty who took French in high school and did not speak a lick of Spanish. Yet, her eyes immediately darted to his. She could almost feel her thoughts being unavoidably pushed aside. Even her concern over this odd situation was fading away, replaced by a growing sexual attraction, and a need to submit… to obey as he said to her, “Soy tu Maestra”

“Lead the way” Carlos directed Timothy. The husband took his wife’s hand and lead the stranger the rest of the way down the snow covered street back to their condo. Brittany continued to look back at Carlos, she couldn’t help it. He was so fascinating, so sexual. She tried to stop herself. She knew she was married, and she had truly never wanted anyone other than Timothy since they met a decade ago. But Carlos, the short, pudgy little Mexican man, was absolutely irresistible.

Carlos asked Timothy to formally invite him in once more as they reached the condo. He of course obliged. Carlos looked around as he stepped inside. First of all, it felt nice to be warm again. He was also glad he had found these two out and about in a neighborhood that actually had power. So much of Texas was in the dark. The condo was very tastefully decorated, and Carlos could quickly tell that the couple had money.

He politely asked Brittany to lock all the doors and close all the blinds, which she did immediately. She was so turned on by him that she didn’t even wonder why he was doing that. When the last of the drapes were pulled closed, he thanked her. They locked eyes. She felt her heart jump and her nipples harden. Her pussy was already soaked. She seductively walked over to him as he embraced her in a long sensual kiss. Carlos was all that mattered to her. Timothy had been forgotten.

However, Timothy had not forgotten her. The sight of his beautiful, beloved wife passionately making out with another man was enough to snap him out of his trance.

“Brittany, stop! Something is fucked up here!” Timothy shouted.

Carlos stopped kissing and glared over at Timothy. Brittany however was still kissing his face as he looked away, lovingly stroking his hair, completely in his thrall. Timothy felt a cold chill as Carlos cast his eyes upon him.

The vampire gently took Brittany’s arms and placed them down by her side as she continued to stare down Timothy, to stare down his prey. Timothy knew his life was in danger. Fight or flight kicked in, but with his wife also in trouble, he couldn’t escape. He had no choice but to fight. He lunged at the much smaller Carlos.

With supernatural quickness and strength, Carlos caught the pouncing Timothy by the neck with his hand. He then lifted him up with one arm, rising his shoes about two feet off the ground. Timothy’s eyes widened at shock as he realized the might of this beast. Carlos angrily threw Timothy over the granite kitchen island, causing him to smash the stools on the other side. With equal quickness, Carlos leapt over the island and feasted on Timothy’s neck. Quickly and efficiently, he drained the attorney of blood and life force. The vampire felt his own strength grow with each ounce.

Brittany’s kiss with Carlos had exchanged some bodily fluids between them. Even some of Carlos’ saliva in her mouth was enough to keep her much deeper under his spell than Timothy had been. However, this was her beloved husband on the ground, being attacked by this stranger. She slowly moved over to the counter and peered over to see what was happening.

“Timothy?” she said quietly, causing Carlos to stop feeding and turn his attention to her.

His mouth showing only trickles of blood (he had spent years learning how to eat cleanly), he rose from his victim. Brittany’s eyes were stuck on her lifeless husband on the kitchen floor. Carlos looked at her as he moved slowly to her. He heard her breathing get quicker as he got closer. She had a look on her, like she was asking him to fuck her right now but did not have the courage to say anything. He had seen that look many times. Slowly, Carlos circled her, getting behind her, grinding his hard cock in his pants along her ass. "He was your husband, but he wasn’t your Master, was he?"

"No." Brittany said softly and immediately Carlos dropped his pants. Brittany was in heat and followed, pulling her skirt down along her knees. Instantly, she was bent over the counter and getting rammed by his vampiric cock in her tight pussy.

"Harder! Fuck me Harder!" Brittany begged him, speaking in a way she never had. "Oh! My! God!" she repeated with every thrust he pushed. Her hands knocking over things on the counter as he thrusted.

"Yesss my slave!" Carlos said, fucking her with all his might, grunting like a wild animal,. Brittany wrapped her arms around his waist encouraging him go even harder.

Carlos turned the married nutritionist around and she quickly stepped out her skirt. He picked her up like she was a feather, Brittany let out a loud yelp, and sat her on his rigid cock as he really started fucking her. Brittany was bouncing on his cock up and down, her shirt pulled up to reveal her tits. Their chests sliding along each other as she rose and fell on his cock.

Brittany looked him dead in the eyes and move in for a passionate sloppy kiss, not noticing or caring about the bits of Timothy’s blood. Carlos kept his fast fucking motion as he returned her kiss. They tongues were dancing and exploring each other's mouths.

Brittany pulled away and kept screaming, "Yassss!! Give it to me! FUCK ME MASTER!"

Carlos pulled her into his cock as he thrusted in, as he lets out some powerful grunts, BAM! Brittany let out whimper and moan as she bounced off his hips, before she could escape the full length of his cock, Carlos pulled her back in again and with even more force. BAM! BAM! BAM

Brittany was beyond her limits, she was dead weight barely able to keep herself on him as she flopped around, obsessively thanking and begging creature who had just killed her husband.

Finally Carlos lifted her off his cock and set her down on her knees. Then aggressively grabbed her head and plunged his cock into her mouth. Brittany had never sucked a cock before, but she quickly got up to speed as she was getting used to her new Master’s cock. It began to slide inside her mouth easily as she began gulping it in with each thrust. Saliva was running down chin and onto her chest.

"Yes my pet!" Carlos screamed, as pulled his glistening cock out her mouth. He held his cock by the base slapping Brittany side to side until...

"Uhhhhnnnggg!" Carlos's wailed, as he shot several thick stream of creamy white cum onto Brittany's face.

Carlos brought Brittany's face back in and immediately, she knew what to do. Her succulent lips instantly wrapped around his cock’s head and began sucking the remaining juices out and around his cock. Carlos knew full well that his essence was going to give him full and utter control of this beautiful woman.

When she was finally finished, he looked down at her. “What do you do for work?” he asked. He noticed his English was much better after consuming Timothy’s blood. Little things like that always intrigued him, even after 150 or more years of being a vampire.

“I’m a nutritionist” she answered him as she lovingly caressed his leg, still on her knees.

Carlos laughed, as he briefly wondered what the nutritional value of a vampire’s cum was. “Where do you work?”

“Baylor Specialty Hospital, here in North Dallas” she answered. Her heart jumped as her Master nodded approvingly.

“Can you get me to the coroner?” he asked, as he began the plan to dispose of Timothy without alerting the authorities. The coroner would become his human slave, just as Brittany would. There was some work ahead of him, but for what began as a cold hungry night, this unexpected delivery had drastically improved Carlos’ outlook here in North Dallas.

[soopersara]

Okay but the "hereditary" goodness Iroh referenced has always seemed odd and not well thought-out. Do you think the ATLA writers overdid it with trying to write symbolism or is there actually sensible lore behind it?

Anonymous said:

How do you feel about Zuko being Roku’s great-grandson? I always felt that it reduced his very universal conflict about making the right choice even when it’s hard into an issue of genetics. Zuko is in turmoil not because his values don’t align with his father’s regime but because a relative that he never knew about was good. I get that it builds another connection with Aang but it almost ruins Zuko’s conflict for me.

I’m going to go ahead and combine these two asks because I can. 

I’m fine with Zuko being one of Ruko’s descendants on some levels. Like, as a source of humor with the old “don’t talk back to your great-grandfather” jokes between Zuko and Aang, it’s fine. And I can buy the idea that Azulon thought it would strengthen his bloodline to have Ozai marry and make babies with one of Roku’s descendants. Neither of those things are vital to the story in my opinion, but there’s nothing wrong with them either. 

But... yeah. I’m not a fan of the idea that Zuko’s inner turmoil was the result of the “good” and “bad” sides of his ancestry warring inside of him. Just... what? Since when has morality had a genetic component? I mean, genetics can predispose people to other traits that might tip the scales one way or the other (tendencies toward aggression, capacity for empathy, and mental illness being a few of the things that come to mind), but they aren’t the only factors that make a difference, not by a long shot. People may be born with traits that influence their behavior, but values and morals are learned, not inherited. 

To me, it feels cheap to reduce Zuko’s struggle to do the right thing (and his struggle to figure out what the right thing is) to a conflict between his ancestors. It’s overly simplistic to say that Sozin’s descendants can only ever be evil and Ruko’s descendants can only ever be good. And yet that’s essentially the message that the episode is giving. Zuko has darkness inside of him because he’s Sozin’s descendant, but he also has lightness inside of him because he’s Roku’s descendant? So the only reason Zuko wants to do good is because he has some of Roku’s genes? 

Okay... then explain Iroh to me. Iroh is not a descendant of Roku. Iroh is a generation closer to Sozin, and therefore has more of Sozin’s blood than Zuko does. And yet Iroh turns against his nation (late in life, but still) because his experiences taught him that the Fire Nation was wrong. Iroh did bad things in his past, but devoted his later years to doing good and reversing the harm he and his nation had done to the world. Iroh doesn’t seem to struggle with “inner darkness” the way that Zuko supposedly does, despite a closer relation to Sozin and no known “good” ancestors. Iroh’s biggest struggle in the show is between doing what’s best for Zuko’s wellbeing and doing what’s best for the world, neither of which is an evil goal, despite the fact that they sometimes conflict. 

Or what about Azula? She is a descendant of Roku, and yet she never once questions whether the Fire Nation is right to take over the world. She struggles, yes, but with the pressures of being Ozai’s perfect daughter and with feelings of being unloved, not with her sense of right and wrong. 

It’s like the conflict between these characters’ indoctrination and their personal experience has more impact on who they are and what they believe than their genetics do.

But for some reason, The Avatar and The Firelord wants us to believe that Zuko is the exception, and that his conflict has nothing to do with his actual experiences, and has everything to do with the fact that his great-grandfather was a good guy. 

????

Sorry, but like... all four of my great-grandfathers were farmers, and I’ve never once had the compelling urge to go milk a cow. Personal experiences make a difference. Certainly more difference than the legacy of someone you’ve never even heard of. 

So... yeah, I kind of hate the implication that Roku is the source of Zuko’s goodness, and that the conflict between Roku and Sozin is the source of Zuko’s inner turmoil. All the glimpses we got of Zuko as a little boy showed him as a kind, optimistic kid with no hint of the “darkness” or turmoil that were supposedly a part of him from birth. He was a good kid struggling to live up to the expectations of an abusive father and grandfather, and trying to believe in what he was taught about his nation. Where was this “inner darkness” when he put the value of human life above his nation and spoke out, earning himself a permanent scar and banishment for his efforts to do good? If anything, his turmoil and confusion over right and wrong came from the experience of being horribly punished for doing what he (rightfully) believed was good, not from any innate evilness. 

But like I said, I can live with the idea of Roku being Zuko’s ancestor. Not his great-grandfather, because math is a thing, and it’d have to be 2 or more greats for the timeline to make any sense, but I’m fine with Ursa being one of Roku’s descendants if it’s just played for laughs and justified with the old “Azulon married off Ozai to a descendant of the Avatar because he wanted strong bending genes.” But as a source of Zuko’s moral dilemma? No. There’s way more compelling sources for that conflict in the show, and I will take any and every opportunity to throw out the idea that Zuko has had a evil side since birth and that he’ll have to fight against it for the remainder of his life.