#there. i can have an unflattering read on your personal character based on your opinions on fictional guys too.

[bitchingintothevoid1919]

think the thing that bothers me most about a bunch of these antis (of charas like mq, jc, jgy, sj) is that they're hell bent on interpreting everything that the character does in the worst light possible. they already dislike the character, so, everything that the character does must have been done for some kind of selfish or unsympathetic reason.

so, while i suppose it can be annoying when character stans go in the other direction and downplay anything bad that a character has done, i think it's 1000x more obnoxious when character antis refuse to conceive of any positive qualities of the character they're bashing. or of any complex motivations, anything that goes beyond "pah, yeah they're just the evilest guy ever so of course they did that thing for evil reasons."

i wouldn't trust them not to be that way with people irl, if i'm being perfectly honest.

personally i've had quite enough of people who project the worst kinds of motivations on you because they're already convinced you're a bad person.

:)

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket,Se03, Ep 8 (part 2)

I finally got my answer on how will kyo’s confession of kyoko will be & how tohru will react. I love the writing, the pacing, the monologue, the dialogue, the facial expressions, tohru’s reaction, kyo’s rejection & tohru’s shock. Even yuki & akito’s involvement! All of it was a chef’s kiss!

I went & watched lots of eps of se01 & 2 & I’m loving all the hints they dropped abt kyo & how his trauma was looming over him all. this. damn. time! Unfortunately, it has reminded me of how much tohru’s own character exploration was diminished in favor of her being the angelic mother & the sohma’s fixer! but moving on & focusing on her shining moment now! I’ll explore her character here with regards of her trauma, real hidden character & future development.

Kyo’s rejection is the best thing that has ever happened to tohru:

(don’t hate me before you read!) XD~ just like you, I’m mad at kyo for hurting tohru & I feel her pain. However, the writer didn’t write this with a sadistic desire to hurt us. Kyo’s rejection is the core of the entire story as it is not only connected to kyo’s trauma, but tohru’s growth & yuki’s emotional involvement with the two, as well as akito’s insecurities. I have explained in my review( part 1) how kyo rejecting tohru was a logical progression of kyo’s trauma, the only possible outcome from his perspective, & the themes tied with such decision. Now, I’ll explain why this rejection is good for tohru in the long run:

1. Showing the hidden ugly side: (The timid, shy, self-sacrificing girl is angry!): Tohru’s entire consciously constructed personality is borrowed from elements in her mom & dad’s life:

She mimicked her dad’s overly polite style to prove that she is indeed his daughter, so her mom won’t be called w*ore & to console her mom, so she wont leave her. She has deep low self-worth issues. I gotta become someone else to be loved.

she has inner fear of bringing shame to her mom’s name, wants to always be the good girl so mom’s get praised for raising her. Thus, hiding ugly aspects such as anger, loud voice & frustration.

She wants to prove that her mom chose right by not neglecting her. wishes to be worth needing & loving for her own self.

All she ever wanted since being a 4 year old child is her mom. No other desire for anything else at all. Since her mom’s death, she’s been lost on what to do, who to be, what to want! then it came to her to stick to her mom’s memory & live for her. Living for a dead person is a self-sacrifice decision. Tohru just didn’t see herself outside of her mom’s influence.  

Ever since meeting kyo, he has been encouraging real aspects of her character: be selfish, complain, cry, get mad, yell, look pathetic, expose unflattering thoughts, show undesirable side, ask for things, no, DEMAND things. She has been reluctantly following his advice & only showing that to him. His confession & inability to accept her love has lead her to show the real hidden tohru behind the “ i’m okay” mask:

The timid, always smiling girl is now showing anger, frustration, stubbornness & determination.

screaming her heart out: “ i don’t believe my mom would say that” stating her opinion in firm voice.

 “even if she did, I have to go against her” the real tohru shows her explosive personality that was buried deep down! it is NOT mom’s life anymore. It is MINE. I decide. I choose. I want. My decisions.

“ why can’t you see that?” argues with him. Tohru, who is soft-spoken & tends to get flustered  when others insist, is now questioning his decision with passion & fierceness!

“ I love you no matter what”. Say what toy want. look at yourself as a monster, a murderer, a loser or a coward. I don’t care what your brain or trauma makes you think. I see the real YOU & it is my decision! I love you ugly & pretty, sad & happy, broken or strong, coward or brave. I take it all & no one is fooling me or changing my mind. I’m my own person & I chose YOU. 

 2. Letting go of attachments: Learning to LIVE:

Tohru’s attachment to her mom isn’t healthy. It’s  toxic as it hinders her from being her own person. To be able to love kyo, she lets go of “ listening to mommy’s words” . Apparently, her mom condemned kyo as unforgivable. Tohru knows the real kyo & doesn’t even care for forgiveness despite her mom’s alleged words. Breaking the toxic bond. She formed a healthier bond with kyo. However, if kyo is unable to accept this love. what would tohru do? die?? kill herself?? kyoko wasn't able to continue to love her husband cuz he died. her reaction was neglecting her daughter & roaming away in utter grief. Tohru mustn’t follow her mom’s example. Not all loved ones leave us out of hate. Some leave each other cuz of death (kyoko/tohru), ( kyoko/ katsuya), Others might leave each other out of current traumatic pain, mental health, emotional hindrance despite loving each other so dearly (kyo/tohru). If kyo despite his immense love to tohru, can’t forgive himself, they won’t be together. tohru can cry, scream, yell, but if he doesn't overcome his issues & come back, tohru gotta let go. She gotta learn to let go & not kill herself over what she cant have.

Kyo, on the opposite, gotta learn to hold on to loved ones! Let go of pain but hold on to real ppl not dead ghosts of the past. He must learn to act on his own desire & need for tohru. Only when he forgives himself, he’ll hold on to her. It is then, that tohru will decide again if she’ll have him or not.

3- Wanting things doesn't mean you WILL have them: (You are enough by yourself- moderation)

tohru wants kyo, the first thing she has ever wanted. However, she won’t  automatically get him just because she now learned to demand things. There are obstacles that can stop that. Tohru must accept kyo’s inability to be with her now & live healthily regardless. This ties to akito as well. She wants the zodicas but she cant have them! Emotional distance separate them. What will akito do if she can’t have what she wants? kill kurno? kill tohtru? kill herself? will this bring the zodiacs back? NO. You are enough by yourself. She needs to let go & learn to accept that love means acceptance between the involved parties, emotional connection isn't enough.

-Realistic depiction of romantic relationship progression: (thro better & worse). EPIC writing!

It is indeed fate that brought tohru back in kyo’s path 4 months after her mom’s death & the they do share a mutual past: kyoko. However, fervor grateful to the author for writing them falling in love together isn’t due to fate, coincidence, mutual past or similar personalities. Kyo consciously avoided tohru while tohru herself struggled to understand kyo initially. The author spend valuable time building their romantic relation based on mundane daily life activities. They themselves don’t quite know when exactly that they fell in love. when they recalled falling in love, we see them cooking together, talking, walking, eating, studying & opening up abt small struggles.

It is genius that the writer will add yet another realistic aspect. While kyo was able to read tohru & approach her when she’s down, this doesn't mean he magically understood her & will forever be on the same page & never ever hurt each other at all. If you fell in love, you are bound to be hurt by the person who loves you back as much as be happy together. It is realistic!!! Adding miscommunication & personality differences enrich the relationship. This relationship isn’t just fluffy & lovey dovey. They have realistic issues that they need to work on by communicating. Even communication  wont solve their quarrel if it isn’t done in the right time & with the right desire to connect.

-The weight & future lessons learned from of “ I’m disappointed in you” for both kyo & tohru:

Right now kyo is too emotional to connect & tohru herself is too emotional to understand his response. Tohru understands his pain but her low self-esteem prevents her from seeing that he is rejecting being loved , not rejecting her. He is not rejecting tohru as a person but rejecting kyo as a person deserving love. Thanks to his “ i’m disappointed in you” which really leaves no room for interpretation from tohru’s perspective. I love that!!!! Kyo isn’t good with words. This has been clear from ep 1, his actions has always been his love language, but now he couples bad words “ i’m disappointed in you” with bad actions: running away. This is a perfect opportunity to build their future relationship on a solid foundation: ( off course I’m not belittling their current emotions, I understand why each is very broken now, but I’m talking abt future learning lessons)

Kyo’s current mistake: While him rejecting tohru is justified by the extreme trauma & is logical from his perspective. This doesn’t mean it isnt’t hurtful to her. He chose hurtful words to push her away mimicking how he pushed her in the true form arc. Perfect example of justified mistake yet still a wrong mistake. Thus, kyo needs to learn the effect of his words, he shouldn’t be punished for the past, for tings her cant control, nor for fate. But he should take responsibilities of the present, of what he actually says & does right now.  He must fix this mistake with tohru. This is a mistake that CAN be fixed. someone that he CAN get back. a mistake he CAN stop repeating.He CAN hold on to her with immense desire yet allow room for her to decide for herself.

Tohru’s current mistake: Seeing herself solely thro being loved by kyo. she cant see that he indeed loves her cuz he rejected her. Rejection in tohru’s mind equal lack of love. Her mom left her, thus her mom didnt love her. This respective is very justified due to her trauma, & it is logical that she reached this conclusion. She isnt in his head, she cant know whats in his heart if his words say sth else. However, having a logical perspective doesn't mean it is right. it is still wrong to solely exist thro what you can see & hear. Real emotions run deeper. We must take things with moderate approach. Tohru needs to have higher self-esteem, to allow room for misunderstanding without completely breaking down. In her future life, she’ll be in lots of situations where ppl could hurt her intentionally or unintentionally. She needs to take things with calmer pace & open the door in her mind for doubt & better judgement. As much as loved ones words hurt, to build a healthy relationship, you must leave room for communication & misunderstanding. Hence, you’ll get closer & closer. 

Side Notes:

 I love tohru’s faulty attachment thro only being loved back exactly as she pictures in her mind. it is so human, so real, & so endearing! Very opposite of se01 & 2 image of her being the wise, device-giving mother with right thing to say & do. Screw that unrealistic image! allow tohru to be real! best ep ever! Hopefully, no more of this tohru!

Kyo’s constant repeat of mistakes is the best character trope done right! so realistic. It is genius that the author used this trope to humanize the demonic cat spirit!! what screams human better than the most annoying human trait: repeating mistakes!!!!  Kyo, my son! it’s time to learn! cant wait to see how the author will do that.

young boy/ adult woman friendship? Was that ever made without  disgusting sexualizion? kyoko isnt much of a mom figure to kyo, she tells me abt a husband, child neglect mistakes, custody! he calls her old hag & pushes her! XD. it is friendship!!

i’m mad they didnt focus on tohru’s face when she screamed at kyo confessing her love.. that's tohru moment. Why pan on yuki? you could’ve showed his reaction after she spoke. The same thing was done when tohru confessed to Isuzu!-_-! loved her angry face tho, it was beautifully drawn, so thanks for that. XD

Yuki is forever the best tohru/kyo shipper & the best tohru-happiness defender. I love how he runs after kyo & yet checks on tohru! I’m curious tho, he didnt hear any of kyo/kyoko confession as he was asleep, only the the “ forgive/not forgive line” so, he’ll be wondering forgive what? tohru’s mom knows kyo? I’m excited on how they’ll put things into context. also, I LOVE YUKI.

I’m forever thankful that everything akito is pushed into next ep. The knife wielding action & akito’s dramatic outbursts would’ve stolen from the emotional weight of kyo’s confession. Kyo’s secret is the core of furuba since ep, 1, the entire dynamics of kyo/tohru/yuki /kyoko/ hat is established based on this ep. Shoving akito, too, would create the same annoying train bullet feeling of momiji’s & tohru’s ep (ep 5 & 6). Emotional scenes pushed together with lesser time for the respective characters to have their well-deserved focus.

This is the most I am attached & satisfied with furuba! it scares me since ep 9 continues the climax. My fears of potential dramatic animation since the knife is there! moreover, akito’s own animation is always over the top. I hope they tone it down to portray her as a human more than a maniac.

Also, I hope they dont drag the climax more than that. What more you can shove in the dramatic raining weather. Tohru/kyo scene here matched the true arc scene bringing back parallel. Now akito/tohru raining scene next ep will match se02, ep10 scene. Now, what will the author do to defuse the climax? Often writing the falling action is harder than the climax itself. Falling action doesnt mean happy times & solving issues. It means dealing with the consequences of the climax. Let’s see what the writer has in store.

Based on the flashbacks, Kyoko didnt have ill feelings with kyo!!!! Until the last time he saw her as a child, she was happy with him. Even when he pushed her, she took it as a childlike behavior. at the accident, she didnt have much time to have any ill feelings. No way she thought he pushed her, no way she thought he could’ve saved her. So if she really recognized him, why would she say “ I wont forgive you”? it doesnt make sense at all. Kyoko doesn't hate kyo!!!! So, either he imagined, which is sth that I’ll hate so much! I spent so much emotions attached to a non existant words! NO. plz! NO!! Other possibility, she said sth else closer to the words! but then again how would we know? I NEED to know! ~ as expected, I’m still attached to this damn line! XD. 

Kyo depressed in the mountains after kyoko’s death was very vaguely referenced in (1) se01, ep24 when kyo talked to kazuma! oh shoot! (2) in se02, sp 2 when kazuma thought back to kyo nearly killing himself in depression before meeting the dad, (3) in se02, ep 9 when kyo trampled on the flower! oof! i love this subtle style of writing! connecting the emotional dots! EPIC!

Various characters throut seasons 1, 2 & 3 noticed the real gentle kyo towards tohru: (1) Isuzu’s “ I hope tohru meets someone like haru, to gently open the door” se02, ep19. (2) Momiji having faith that kyo is the right person for tohru & pushing him, (3) yuki constantly musing over tohru/kyo love & drawing inspiration on wanting “ his own person to love like them” (3) Kisa saying kyo is kind to tohru se3, (4) shigure saying, you are exclusively kind to tohru se02, (5) Airisa saying, when will kyo confess in se01, (6) hana saying, marry my sister in the play & pushing him to not be locked! (7) yuki kicking him for saying “ its not your business” to tohru in kyoto trip, (8) kakeru saying “ kyo’s her boyfriend? “ AA~~~~ the whole cast know & can see his love to her!!! TOHRU! He doesnt hate you! KYO!! the entire cast thinks you DESERVE HER & is KIND! not a monster! Is there an image set of those moments of the cast saying that here in tumblr? kindly mention me to see it! I fear going to the tags & seeing spoilers T_T.

[rudolphsboyfriend]

JKR’s chamber of secrets: the racist undertones in the harry potter books

The harry potter book series is arguably one of the most popular works of modern fiction. It is widely regarded as essential reading for children all over the world, and has one of the biggest fan bases of any book series. Despite it being one of the biggest phenomena of English literature, the series and the author often showcase and promote bigoted opinions, such as racism, and transphobia. In this speech I will be discussing JKRs chamber of secrets: the underlying tones of racism in the Harry Potter books.

The first thing I would like to point out, is that the elves have from the beginning been seen as these happy, carefree slaves, that are completely and utterly against freedom. This to begin with, is feeding into the slaving myth and propaganda that slave owners that told to the general public so they could benefit from free labour. This is very racist as it suggests that JKR believes that slaves were a good thing and should not have been eradicated. Hermione is the only one who seems to care about the elves’ freedom and while fighting for their freedom she is seen as a silly, misguided person for it.

Another problem with this is that while the good guys try to fight back against Voldemort's racist ideology of only wanting purebloods to exist, and wants to eradicate muggleborns, they also complicit with Voldemort's racist ideology. Wizards treat muggles as inferior to them this is shown from the first book, ‘even the muggles have noticed somethings going on’ Professor McGonagall says dismissively and Hagrid tells Harry ‘It’s your bad luck you grew up in a family o’ the biggest Muggles I ever laid eyes on’. It is obvious that the word muggle is not only a description it’s an insult. They also abuse muggles by erasing their memories which is distinctly a violation of consent. The books show an obvious social hierarchy, the idea that some people are better than others: purebloods, half-bloods, muggleborns, muggles, half-giants, werewolves, goblins, elves. And if this way of thinking is applied, as this book is targeted to children it can make them think that some people are better than others and if they apply this to race, sexuality, and transgender people, it can create a generation of bigoted people as so many people see her as a role model that they can copy her bigoted way of thinking. She is one of the main reasons that there are so many transphobic people is because SHE encouraged them to become more radicalised.

J.K Rowling is also anti semantic as she based goblins on harmful Jewish stereotypes. Due to years of anti-Semitism Jews were portrayed as having big noses and being greedy, as they tended to work with money. But at this point who's surprised?

The few people of colour presented in the books were done in a racist fashion. Firstly, the Patil sisters, were the only desi characters in the book and they were sort of prissy and irrelevant to the story, that being said. The outfit they were is a more simplistic, watered-down, unflattering version of actual Indian ethnic wear. In general, Indian clothing is so bright and beautiful, and the designs are so intricate, the designers simply didn’t bother to represent Indian culture, instead chose to focus entirely on Hermione's glow up. Secondly, Cho Chang. WOW! Do I need to say more? This is one of the most openely racist things she has done. She took two Korean surnames mixed them together and called it a day. Especially in a magical world full of mystical names like Luna Lovegood, Albus Dumbledore, and Nymphadora Tonks, she didn’t even give the name even an ounce of thought.

By casting a Korean actress to play Nagini, in Fantastic Beasts, who later on becomes a pet for a white man, when she is the only Asian character is racist. End of story. It is specifically the lack of diversity that makes this stand out. It IS racist to Asian women because Asian women only ever see stereotypes like the exotic Asian woman who is fetishized by white men – which is a REAL thing. Having Nagini being owned and controlled by a white man, is harmful and just racist. Did J.K Rowling not have a single person that could have pointed the problem of having an Asian women end up in permanent enslavement to an evil white guy?

Due to the criticism J.K Rowling received for not including enough diversity in the books, she claimed that Hermione was black, which is great, but did not bother to include this in the books. She thought that by saying that ‘hey guys I now think Hermione is black’ it was enough. She simply wanted those brownie points. It is increasingly obvious that she can never be bothered to write good representation.  She also did this when she made Albus Dumbledore gay, as queer baiting to add more diversity. This could be rebutted with the idea that she does not know how to include more accurate representation. However, Rick Riordan, who in the beginning didn’t have a very inclusive universe, strived and learned to write and include diversity in the Percy Jackson universe. The author of one of the most popular book series is more than capable of learning how to write more inclusive books, she does not though because she is racist, homophobic and transphobic.

In conclusion, there are a lot of racist undertones to the harry potter books, that reflect the authors actual feelings in real life. She does not include enough representation and the few she does are written in a racist manner. In recent years she has also proved to be incredibly transphobic, teaching young children who see her as a role model that trans men are not real men, when they are and the other way round. And this concludes, today’s speech on why JK Rowling is a vile human being.

this is my speech it suck but it drags JKR through the mud and i have no brain cells left over

also @noboren and @sarcastic-sayori heres my shitty speech if you think of ways of making better please tell me

WOOHOO BESTIEEE NICE!!!!! Drag her 😌🙏🏼

[hyuckles-chuckles]

hiding in a tree — j. jaehyun

the most handsome guy on campus asks you out on a date, despite ending up in a tree you aren’t necessarily k-i-s-s-i-n-g him.

pairing ; son of aphrodite!jung jaehyun x fem!reader

other character(s) ; son of hephaestus!johnny seo

genre ; fluff, angst, demigod!au, college!au · word count ; 2.4k · rating ; 15 · warning(s) ; usage of weaponry, demigod swearing, mentions of killing evil monsters

request ; “jaehyun + 1 : ‘what did you think was going to happen?’ + m : demigod!au” by @ahgase55g7​ !

masterlist ; adobe’s 1500 follower celebration

a/n ; i truly truly truly love writing demigod/pjo fics, thanks for the request love! i hope y’all enjoy this greek mythology mess + fyi this took me a day to write when it took me a whole year to get tddd out so maybe this is improvement idk you tell me please tell me i love hearing feedback from y’all

hiding in a tree is copyright 2020 hyuckles-chuckles, all rights reserved.

If you knew that going on a date with Jaehyun would end up with you stuck in a tree with an enraged boar at the bottom of it as he and his friend tried to kill it, you wouldn’t have accepted. Who were you kidding? He could’ve taken you to the Underworld and you still would’ve enjoyed yourself.

Maybe on your next date you could go to the Underworld since that suddenly existed now.

Jaehyun was probably the most beautiful person you had ever seen. And every single person on your campus would agree with you. You didn’t even think that he knew you existed considering you only shared your Creative Writing class with him since he majored in Visual Art and you majored in Literature. You didn’t even see him at any parties since you started tertiary schooling.

But from those few moments in your only class together, he spotted you from the class, his first words to you being ‘This could be weird since we’ve never spoken before, but I think you’re so beautiful. Would you like to go on a date with me?’ You stood with your mouth agape, only responding with a rather loud ‘yes’ when he started to chuckle at your expression. You were already getting your phone out to get his number, but he said he didn’t have a phone. You were surprised but laughed it off as you jotted the details of the date into your notes app.

Nothing could get rid of the smile on your face that day.

You anticipated your date for a few days, agreeing to have a picnic in the park on the weekend (which you found odd considering your first dates were mainly always at a café — this seemed a lot more romantic in your opinion). While you waited for the weekend, every time you had class together you would sit together and get to know each other better before your date.

You even sneaked some selfies with him while he was paying attention to your lecturer. No matter the angle — flattering or unflattering — he managed to look good in every single one. You were extremely jealous. You even teased him at how unfair it was for him to look so good, causing a blush to form on his dimpled cheeks as he walked you to your apartment.

“Uh, so I’ll see you here tomorrow then,” Jaehyun said at the bottom of your staircase as you unlocked the door to go inside of your apartment building.

“Twelve o’clock sharp. You don’t have a phone so I can’t call you if you’re late.”

“If I’m late, I’ll just call you from a payphone — you gave me your number for a reason,” he chuckled as you stood in your doorway. “Bye, beautiful.”

“Bye,” you greeted him with a wave, closing the door before he could see the smile that spread across your face. You could say you were a little excited for your date with Jaehyun.

You sat at the top of the steps as you waited for Jaehyun. You didn’t realise you had been ready far too early for the date when he was actually supposed to pick you up. But who could blame you when that beautiful boy was supposed to take you on a date? Literally no one could — they would be doing exactly what you are doing.

You looked to your watch, smiling as you only had a minute left until Jaehyun came to pick you up and walk you to the park. You smiled even more brightly when you caught sight of him. Other times you had seen him, he was always calm and collected, a natural smile gracing his features. This time he seemed kind of…stressed. Maybe he was nervous because of your date, but he didn’t seem like himself.

“Hey!” you greet him, walking down the steps, stopping at the very last one. Despite your added height, he was still slightly taller than you.

“Hey, beautiful,” he exhaled, hugging you and bringing you down to the ground. “You ready to go?” he asked, already taking your hand and walking towards the park.

“Jae, wait,” you giggle, pulling on his arm for him to stop. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” he stutters. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well,” you muse as you take in his appearance. His hair is dishevelled as if he ran to your apartment. Between the handles of the basket he held was a baseball bat which you weren’t expecting. And when you looked to his half tucked in shirt, you noticed a quite large mirror hanging from his belt. “You seem…off.”

“Trust me, I’m not,” he gives you a reassuring smile. “Let’s just get to the park — and get there fast.”

Jaehyun walks fast in front of you, you jogging to keep up with his pace. When he finally stops you catch your breath and hold your chest. He notices and gets you a bottle of water from the basket.

“Thank you,” you laugh, trying to hide your embarrassment.

“I’m sorry,” he chuckled, running a hand through his hair, making it look even messier than before. “Sometimes I forget people aren’t like me.”

“And what makes you different?” you ask. He suddenly tenses, so you relieve his tension with a joke. “Because you’re prettier than people?”

You see his shoulders relax, which causes you to worry. You got to know him this past week and right now he didn’t seem like himself. “Jaehyun, are you sure you’re okay? We can reschedule the date if you’re not feeling well.”

“No, I’m fine, being at the park is actually keeping me calm,” he reassured you, and even though you knew deep down he wasn’t fine, you had the need to believe so you did.

“So, are you planning on having us play baseball?” you ask as you look down at him preparing the blanket and goods.

“Baseball?” he questions, looking up at you quizzically.

“Well, you have a baseball bat next to the basket,” you remind him of his belongings. “But just so you know, I’ve done all my running for the week.”

“Oh, okay,” he says as he glances at the bat, turning to look up at you from where he sat. “Care to join me?” he asked with a raised hand and a dashing smile.

“Of course I will—”

“Jaehyun! What are you doing here?!”

You both look up at the person who called for Jaehyun. You recognise it as Jaehyun’s friend Johnny. He seems to be in a similar state as your date only much, much worse.

“What the Hades are you doing here?!” Jaehyun exclaims, getting up in an instant, grabbing his baseball bat and looking around the park.

“Hades?” you mumble to yourself, curious as to why he would say the Greek God of the Underworld’s name.

“You told me to lure it to the park!”

“No, I said away from the park!” Jaehyun groans. He seems to have forgotten you’re right behind him, but you know he’s just preoccupied with Johnny at the moment.

“Well, it’s on its way here, you should make sure (Y/N) is protected.”

“(Y/N)? (Y/N)!” he groans, turning around abruptly and placing his hands on your forearms — you would’ve laughed if he didn’t look so scared. “You have to get in the tree.”

“What?” you say as you look at the tall tree. “We’re not tall enough to get me in the tree and also I don’t want to. What’s happening, Jae? I don’t understand what’s happening.”

Jaehyun scrunches his face in frustration, turning around to point his bat to his friend. “Why can’t you listen to me?”

“Because I’m too busy admiring your beauty,” he sneers.

As they argue, you start to feel a rumble at the bottom of your feet and they feel it too. “Okay, (Y/N)!” Jaehyun turns to face you. “I’m going to help you up the tree.”

“Jaehyun, that’s impossible — ah!” You’re surprised at his strength. He holds you by your calves, balancing you so you can grab the branch with ease. “How am I supposed to get down?!”

“I’ll catch you!” Jaehyun smiles up at you, but it fades as you glare at him. “Just get high up, okay beautiful.” You don’t answer him, but you do as he says.

“I can’t believe you brought the Calydonian Boar here on my date,” you hear Jaehyun scold at Johnny from the ground.

You don’t listen to the rest of their argument; your interest is only searching what boar they were talking about and why it was bad to bring to the park. Your eyes widen as you see what Google gives you. There’s no way that they’re talking about the boar that was killed by a king’s son in Greek mythology. There has to be some other boar named after this Greek monster, but you don’t find anything.

You look down to the ground and you see Jaehyun holds his bat and large mirror, Johnny hold a wrench as you see a basic boar run up to them. But as if suddenly a mist was lifted, you see different things. Instead of a bat and wrench, they hold swords — Jaehyun’s a muted red with a reflective blade and Johnny’s a golden colour with ridges in the blade, it seemed seemed to fit their personalities well. And instead of the mirror Jaehyun held, a reflective shield took its place. You crane your neck to the boar and suddenly it’s also changed into the Calydonian Boar and…no way. It had lightning coming out of its mouth!

You refuse to look down, leaning your head against the tree, looking up into the sky as you try to ignore the sounds from the base of the tree. You don’t understand what’s going on or how it’s happening, but you hope that your date and his friend are okay. From your brief reading on the boar, you know it was hard to kill and that it actually killed some of the hunters when it was hunted the first time.

All of a sudden there’s a cheer from the boys, but you still don’t take your chance at looking down. You don’t know what else this boar could do — it might as well take the appearance of those its just killed and is looking for a new being in yourself.

“Beautiful, it’s okay! You can come down now!”

“I’m fine up here!”

You hear nothing for a while until you feel a hand on your calf. You scream at the touch but quickly stop when you see that it’s Jaehyun. You calm yourself with deep breaths, as Jaehyun sits on your branch. You see that Jaehyun has a bruise on his cheek, a rip in his shirt and pants that appear to be smoking and a burn on his knuckles.

You couldn’t believe that he’s actually messier than before your date.

“You okay?” he asks you, a soft smile on his lips.

“Am I okay? Are you okay?” you ask as you take in his appearance once more. You’re pretty sure his shoes were white before and not black.

“Yeah, I guess I have some explaining to do,” he nervously chuckles before taking a deep breath himself.

“I’m a demigod, which means I’m half human and half God — specifically Aphrodite, she’s my mom. Johnny’s also one, we met at this camp for demigods, and he needed help getting rid of this Calydonian Boar which is—”

“I know what it is,” you interrupted, showing him your most recent search. “Continue about your whole demigod thing.”

“You’re taking this awfully well — better than my actual dad.”

“Well, I just experienced it, there’s no reason for me not to believe you,” you chuckled, finally leaning forward and placing your hand on his bare arm that showed through the hole. “Just continue, I’m curious now.”

“Well, that’s the thing,” he grimaced. “I wasn’t actually planning on telling you that today. That would be considered a sixth date kind of confession. I obviously didn’t mean for this to happen, and I understand if you don’t want to continue dating—”

You interrupt him once more by leaning forward and kissing him sweetly, your cheeks heating up as you hear Johnny cheer for you from the ground.

“Woah,” he sighs, as he slowly opens his eyes to look into yours. “I wasn’t expecting that to happen.”

“What did you think was going to happen? I was going to stop dating you just because you’re a freaking son of Aphrodite?”

“It’s a lot more than just me being her son,” he states seriously. “Did you see how I killed that boar?”

“I didn’t want to,” you admit, your face scrunching in disgust as you remember peering down for those few seconds.

“I get that,” he says with a shrug of his shoulders as he gracefully jumps off of the branch onto the one just below your one. “You need help?” he asks with a raise of his hand.

“Uh, definitely,” you say as you take his hand to help lead you down the tree. You yelp when he just jumps from the last branch, rolling onto his back like a gymnast and landing elegantly on his feet.

“Okay, beautiful, jump.”

“Can we just get a ladder?” you nervously ask.

“Holy Hera, I actually have a ladder at camp that’s taller than this tree,” Johnny remembers, frowning when he realises that no one is listening to him.

“I can catch you — just jump!” You know that you don’t want to jump, but you do anyway, screaming as you fall into Jaehyun’s arms. “Told you,” he smirks as he brings you down to the ground.

“Okay, well, I’m going to leave you two — I’ll see you around campus!” Johnny says as he leaves you and Jaehyun alone in the park. “And don’t use your charmspeak on poor (Y/N)!”

“Charmspeak?” you repeat, confused at what Johnny meant by that.

“Uh, I’ll tell you some other time,” Jaehyun mumbles.

“So, that was some fight,” you bring up, looking at the destruction of the picnic that the boar caused.

“Do you want to reschedule this date?” he asked you, moving his hands up and down your forearm.

“How about we order take-out and watch Hercules?” you joke as he walks to your apartment with his arm around your shoulder.“It’s actually pronounced Heracles, but I blame that on Disney.”

to celebrate getting 1500 followers on here, i opened up my requests! be prepared for more requested works from me!

© hyuckles-chuckles, 2020. please don’t copy or repost without permission.

[love-takes-work]

Unpopular opinion: Rocknaldo was fine (not GREAT, just fine) and most of the hate for it is either a misinterpretation of its thesis or a feeling of betrayal over the social media promo for it.

strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

YEAH, people so intensely hate this episode and think it means something I never thought it meant. On the one hand I’m super supportive of people wanting to take different interpretations of things, but I don’t understand why some people keep saying “Rocknaldo” was a message to overobsessive/toxic fans or something. I didn’t see any message to fans in there and I don’t quite get what they think the Crew would be trying to say to its fans in such an unflattering way. It seemed like a straightforward message about fake allies to me.

“Rocknaldo” is actually my favorite Ronaldo episode. (Which kinda isn’t saying much since I’m not much of a Ronaldo fan.) But I really liked the idea that they’ve shown Ronaldo as a person who mainly pursues his interests for personal gain and recognition, and that was emphasized in “Rocknaldo.” In the first Ronaldo-focused episode, “Keep Beach City Weird,” he blurted out that what REALLY mattered is that something was finally happening to HIM. He became despondent when it turned out nothing was about him and he’s not at the center of anything. He wants to be important, and he frequently wants to do that at the expense of pushing other people down.

“Rocknaldo” was an escalation of that. He finally accepted some criticism about his behavior toward the Gems, but then his way of “fixing” that was to throw himself into an imagined version of their cause and immediately started telling others how they should execute their missions and standards according to his misinterpretations. They needed to show off their Gems, make a big show of not sleeping, and love and accept everyone (read: him). He wanted to be prioritized and centered in a group he wasn’t really part of and hadn’t authentically learned about. He wanted to walk in and be declared exceptional, wanted to insult Connie’s dedication to the group because he suspected she’s given preferential treatment for being Steven’s “girlfriend,” wanted to sulk and guilt the others about their failure to include him on missions he hasn’t trained for whatsoever.

I’ve met SO many people like him in my activism who are insulting and aggressive as soon as you don’t lick their behinds for joining and center them in your mission. If it ever makes them think they need to question their own inappropriate behavior or makes them feel that someone is more qualified to speak on a subject, there’s a huge outburst about how they’re NOT WELCOMING TO ALLIES or a catastrophic ragequit that blames the established members/leaders for trying to make the newcomer have a seat. If the cause doesn’t make Bloodstone feel good, out comes the shaming, the false equivalence, the claims that they WOULD have been an ally but YOU’RE JUST HOSTILE. Meanwhile they haven’t even been here long enough to know what the mission is.

And of course, “Rocknaldo” ends with Ronaldo backing away from trying to be accepted as a Crystal Gem, but concluding they couldn’t bring him into the fold because he is the ultimate outsider. His specialness and individuality was just too much for them. He honestly didn’t really get the point. And that’s how a lot of these things end, too. They just move on to something else where they can pursue their glory.

I’m not sure WHAT that whole thing is with people being super angry about the Bloodstone-related promo. To me it was utterly clear that we were not actually getting a new character and I did not feel like anyone trolled me. And I think you’re right--the “I expected X and I got Y” effect has marred quite a few episodes and arcs in this series, which is especially frustrating if the expectations WEREN’T actually based on anything anyone promised. 

There are actually some episodes I look forward to way less than “Rocknaldo” when reviewing stuff. And again I think it’s super weird that anyone spins this episode as a message to fans--that “the fandom is toxic” or “Ronaldo represents possessive fans” or something. Tons of professional reviewers saw it the way I did--as a “dangers of fake allies” episode. 

I argued with someone on Reddit about this once. (I’m just in the comments; I didn’t write the OP.)

Still happy to take unpopular opinions where I have to react and explain!

[catty-words]

uhhhh you made some gifs about ben tryng to kiss devi twice despite her not wanting that and you got real poetic in the tags. have you considered that maybe that's messed up? he tried to kiss her. twice. without her consent. a second time he did it after she'd said no. Devi looked really uncomfortable. And he never apologized, just blamed alcohol. how can you romantiise that??? shipping her with ben is fine but uhhhhhhhh that's fucked up

good lord, okay. if that scene bothers you, then it bothers you and i’m likely not going to change your mind about it any more than you’re going to convince me not to enjoy it. but the tone of this ask feels as though your trying to deem it problematic™ in order to feel like you’ve done your work reading the text critically and, like, look. i’m not going to say that your reading is incorrect. devi was uncomfortable. she removed herself from the situation, such was the gravity of her discomfort. but i also don’t think yours is the most genuine reading of the scene, if you wanna be honest. and hey, you came into my askbox, so you’re inviting my honest opinion.

consent is important. let’s start there. if ben were a more perfect person, he’d have asked if he could kiss devi before doing it. but the thing is, one of the main takeaways from the scene is that, far from perfect, ben is an awkward teen boy very much in his own head about his newly intense crush and his all-consuming loneliness. so he doesn’t ask the first time he leans in—he instead relies on the context clues of the birthday present and devi generally being cute and a little giggly to decide she might be into kissing. totally understandable. endearing, even, that ben and devi have this what-the-hell-i’ll-go-for-it kind of approach to crushing in common.

so, the second kiss. not as clean-cut i’ll grant you. devi’s body language and her words communicate that she’s Not Into It. but one of the things i personally find interesting about the scene is the way they’re on two very different pages the whole time. ben wants to unload about how much his parents suck, and devi didn’t exactly show up to the party to shoulder the burden of ben’s loneliness. she’s dealing with plenty of her own that she’s trying to ignore with a Traditional Popular Kid Experience, while ben’s trying to ignore his by hanging with his crush.

that said, ben wanting to kiss devi so badly that he misreads her “it’s cool” as an invitation rather than the placating gesture it is strikes me as well-motivated based on what we know about ben and as a very human thing to do. unflattering? totally. hard to look at directly for all the secondhand embarrassment? depends on your tolerance level. but messed up? i don’t feel the need to take it to that place.

more importantly, though, devi doesn’t feel the need. she tells him in no uncertain terms that him trying to kiss her is why she’s walking away, but she stops and listens to his apology that he pretty much immediately gives her. she trusts him enough to place herself in the extremely vulnerable position of moving in with him.

and sure, i’ll grant you that in both his apologies—because he does apologize and he does it twice, once immediately and then again when he sees her at school—he uses alcohol as a justification. but he’s clearly embarrassed and uncertain where they stand now. we’ve been shown the way that his dynamic with devi is a grounding force in his life; it makes sense that he’s a bit panic-stricken. when i’m flustered by my own shortcomings, i don’t give the best apologies, either. so the fact that his first and also most pressing instinct is to smooth things over, to me, speaks to his character in a good way.

tl;dr: i don’t feel the need to problematize ben’s behavior because devi was in control of the situation the whole time! but if the awkward mess that is those two interacting while wanting wildly different things isn’t entertaining to you, i do not begrudge you this!

anyway, thanks for thinking my tags are poetic that was nice

[ddaenghoney]

chapter ten

masterlist link in blog description.

As a successful songwriter, you want nothing more than the acknowledgment that the chart-topping musical pieces are your own creations. But contracts, relationships, and the difficulty of facing the stakes involved head on, keep your mouth shut until pressure builds too much.

Pairing(s): Park Jimin x Y/N, Min Yoongi x Y/N

disclaimer: any characters depicted do not represent the actual personality of the respected idol in real life.

Series warning(s)/genre(s): Chapter-based written fic, Slow-burn relationship(s), Fake-dating, Unrequited love, Songwriter/producer!oc, idol!Jimin, idol/songwriter/producer!Yoongi, friends with benefits, drama, romance, smut, angst, fluff (updated as needed)

Chapter warning(s): topic of unbalanced-relationship dynamic is brought up, but it’s not,,,,.,. ,real? ik that doesn’t make a lot of sense lol im sorry; yoongi is a sweetie but this time getting flustered

Word count: 5439

if you enjoy please, please let me know!

You awaken from the sound of loud greetings in the distance. As your eyes crack open from the muted light that slips between the sheer curtains, you squeeze tighter onto the pillow that ended up in your arms sometime throughout the evening. The voice continues to blare from the otherside of the apartment, but now it’s laughing contently, doing nothing to help your head stir more conscious. You simply lie there under the cocoon of blankets, thinking nothing other than the fact that you were thirsty.

When you finally sit upright, the pillow remains in your grasp. A tiny grumble escapes your lips at the discomfort of trying to wiggle your legs free of the blankets when they were dressed in jeans you had been wearing the previous day. It’s then that you catch a glance at the clock on the nightstand, and you’re able to fully wake up as you note it reading a time close to noon.

You groan at yourself for not remembering to set an alarm, and then you recall leaving your phone in the other room anyways. Another disgruntled curse dribbles out for the forgetfulness, hoping that Yoongi didn’t have other things planned today that you’ve now made him late for. You’re out the bedroom door in seconds, peeking down the hall as though there is a need to be hidden. The voice from before registers in your eardrums sounding familiar and bright, and you finally take into account that there is indeed a guest of Yoongi’s here that you’re about to have to interrupt.

But your eyes find Yoongi’s person way down the hall as he exits from the kitchen area. His head turns towards you, seemingly startled for a moment when he realizes you’re there and your hand barely waves in return as a greeting.

“You don’t have to hide back there, you know? It’s just Hoseok.” He says gesturing you over with his hand as he then takes a sip of water from a glass.

“I’m not a ‘just’, how dare you.” Hoseok speaks with an appalled tone as you stalk into the room meekly, finding him sitting on the corner of the couch you’d been in the night before. “Ah, hello again.”

“Hi,” You nod your head, feeling embarrassed that you’re still so dazed from sleeping for such a long time, and then you also take into account your appearance likely looking quite unflattering. You bite your lip. “Sorry, I’m interrupting.”

“You’re not at all, he just showed up without saying anything.” Yoongi cuts in as he turns to go back into the kitchen. “Typed in the code on his own and everything. I thought we were going to get killed.”

“He’s dramatic.” Hoseok smiles towards you after rolling his eyes at Yoongi’s sarcastic statements. You nod softly, a tiny polite smile matching it. Your throat feels so dehydrated. “Didn’t realize his girlfriend would be here too, or I would’ve called.” He turns his attention to his phone all the sudden, likely receiving a text. As the title comes into your mind, your head starts to arrange replies suitable for a girlfriend, or to further the charade along in general. Though the implications of being at Yoongi’s apartment in the morning-- in his clothing nonetheless make you stay quiet. Your voice would surely sound awkward.

“He’s just teasing you.” Yoongi says as he walks towards you from the kitchen, another glass of water in hand. “He knows you’re not my actual girlfriend.”

Your shoulders relax at Yoongi’s words, having unknowingly been made a little on edge to have to continue the act so quickly after waking up. Receiving the glass, you greedily lap it up, relief flooding your throat as you try and recall when the day before you had the last drink of water. “Good. I couldn’t think of anything to say.”

Yoongi smiles at your relieved candor and also the way that you practically inhaled the drink, then his head turns back to Hoseok who speaks up. “Yeah, I’m sorry about that; thought he told you that I knew.” You shake your head about to tell him that it’s not a big deal, until Hoseok beats you to a response. “I just came over to see what happened between him and my ex.”

“Drama seeker.” Yoongi teases, though he rubs the back of his head, smile looking contrastingly annoyed at his memory of the night before. The change in disposition makes your lips cast down in the smallest frowns, knowing that you should’ve pressed him more about it because of how much it seemed to bother Yoongi to run into Seulgi. If it weren’t for the onset of exhaustion that set in after all of the frustrated tears, you would have. “She wants me to do more for you. Help you with your comeback.”

You eyebrows furrow slightly. Considering how standoffish Seulgi was towards Yoongi, and how obviously she ignored Hoseok entirely, you find it odd that her demands of Yoongi are seemingly well-intended. Though as Hoseok groans on the couch, hand rubbing his face, you think there’s more depth in those sentences that their face value.

Yoongi’s hand toys with his hair still, averting eyes back to you as he suddenly appears to recall, “Oh, you don’t have plans today, do you? I can drive you back to your place, if you need to be somewhere.”

“Actually,” You start, somewhat hesitant despite Yoongi’s presence lacking anything distant or intimidating. Still, it could be rude to involve yourself with his affairs, but you want to help him if you’re able. “If it’s okay, I wanted to know what happened too.” You say with a small voice, before continuing a little louder, quicker, “But because I was worried about it-- Not just because I wanted to hear gossip, or something.”

“Okay,” Yoongi’s bits of chuckling make your chest rumble free of nervousness. Instead somehow giving you a secure feeling that expands as he nods. “That’s right, you were worried yesterday when it happened.” You nod sincerely, biting your lip as Yoongi’s lip curl to smile softly. “Seulgi doesn’t really like me much.” He says frankly while a nod of his gestures for you to sit in the armchair beside the couch.

“To put it lightly,” Hoseok grumbles with a bitter voice as Yoongi sits centrally on the couch with him, “But why she doesn’t like you is just to save her own face.” He says towards Yoongi then turns his head to you as he explains his point, “She blames Yoongi for why I got kicked out of my company, even though it was my fault-- but between Yoongi and her it’s definitely her fault though. Yoongi didn’t have anything to do with it.”

You notice Yoongi’s face avoid looking towards Hoseok as he speaks, instead constricting in little bits of confliction you believe. Evidently not completely agreeing with what Hoseok tells you, and the thought of it confuses you more, because you can’t rationalize Yoongi taking part in Hoseok’s removal. It’s clear the friendship between them is strong, no animosity whatsoever-- even when there could have sprouted envy from the scandal of the year prior. Hoseok isn’t suspicious of Yoongi in the slightest, or irritated that he’s still successful while Hoseok himself struggles to start over. So it’s a wonder of why Yoongi appears unsatisfied with how Hoseok relates him to the issue.

“Why would she blame Yoongi?” You don’t think anything wrong of your question until Yoongi also looks towards you, both his eyes and Hoseok reflecting shock that confuses you. Then the tone of your words play over in your head and you realize you spoke like you were offended, baffled. Defensive of Yoongi.

“Because,” Hoseok begins, voice still taken back slightly, though the hollow smile of his lips let you think he’s humored by you more than anything. “She doesn’t think he did enough to help me out of what happened when I got kicked out. Did you keep up with it at all? I probably sound like I’m over-selling it, but a lot of articles went out about it.” He continues right along, casually like the situation doesn’t affect him any longer. Perhaps the period of stress already passed while Hoseok only focuses now on overcoming it.

You nod gently, wracking around your brain to recall the majority of the facts that were presented, “You both got caught on a date and your relationship got outted.” You don’t beat around, though your tone is simply factual. “I didn’t pay much attention to be honest though. I was kind of busy back then with my job.” You add on as you recall many nights during that time spent crammed into your home studio working on two different albums at a time, and only getting away from the job when Jimin came over periodically to make sure you took breaks.

“That was practically all that happened.” You startle from your thoughts when Yoongi gripes his opinion aloud, glaring towards the coffee table while Hoseok beside him shrugs, relaxing back into the cushion, like he knows Yoongi isn’t finished. “They were just dating privately, the public found out, and that’s the only truth of it all that happened. Everything else in the media was complete crap.”

“Admittedly,” Hoseok cuts in while Yoongi groans, fiddling with his unkempt hair. “That is basically all that happened between Seulgi and I.” You nod at Hoseok’s intention to soothe over the situation, while your eyes remain trailed rather apologetically towards Yoongi who appears far more irritated by the subject than Hoseok. “But she lied to them to save her and her group’s image.” You watch Yoongi sigh at the end of Hoseok’s softly spoken sentence, frowning more at stirring these memories. You interrupt gently,

“You both don’t have to tell me-- it obviously bothers you-”

Hoseok shakes his head, “I don’t mind. Besides when you pity me by the end of this all, it’ll feel worth it to explain.” His smile is incredibly teasing, tone joking, trying to alleviate any of the heavy atmosphere because truly Hoseok doesn’t feel the remnants of the past as painfully as he used to. You try to match his expression with a tiny smile of your own, but Yoongi doesn’t believe the sight as he bites his lip. Feeling a little bad for bothering you with the messy memories. “She basically told the media that-- because I’ve had my career longer than she did, that I manipulated her into the relationship.”

Hoseok nearly chuckles as you raise your eyebrows in shock at the words. Imagining how scrutinized the entirety of his career could’ve become with a malleable statement like that, you find it shocking to say the least. Even though you can’t say for sure, you assume the two of them had a nice relationship, and for Seulgi to cast all blame onto Hoseok in such a harmful manner, you’re stunned into silence, only reacting by your expression.

“She and I both knew each other since we were trainees.” Hoseok says, stopping as you scoff. Completely thrown off by how Seulgi was able to completely toss Hoseok aside, and say something so damaging-- when it’s clearly wrong if they’ve known each other from before fame. You’re continuously baffled, glancing towards Yoongi who looks at you just nodding his head to assert that what Hoseok said is true. “But anyways, I guess now that I’m trying to have a comeback, she wants to ease her guilt by getting our dear Yoongi here involved in her place.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes, sighing because the thought alone tires him. He’s so fed up with all of the things she’s done to Hoseok that now extend as far as himself like he’s collateral. The extension only serves to further bother Yoongi about everything that Hoseok struggles to go through in order to fix the damage she caused.

“I don’t like her.” You say in the short silence, voice entirely disgusted, “No offense to your old feelings, Hoseok, but she sounds awful.” Yoongi can’t help smiling at his lap while you talk with contempt, finding your bluntness in the midst of heightened emotions consistent from the past instances he’s seen. Thinking it’s somehow an endearing quality.

“No offense taken. I don’t have feelings for her like that anymore anyways.” Hoseok smiles wide at your candor, happy at least that the mood isn’t so bleak anymore.

“Didn’t you say anything to defend yourself in the press though?”

“Well,” His smile crumbles, shifting into a more embarrassed and remorseful disposition when Hoseok rubs his neck sheepishly, “I was kind of stupid back then, and thought I was doing good for her by letting most of it go uncontested.” He chuckles hollowly, and you realize that this is the part of the memories he’s evidently not completely moved on from. You bite your lip, internally apologetic to the question. “That’s my own fault though.”

“No,” Yoongi cuts in quietly, yet firmly. His head shakes softly back and forth. “It’s not.”

You stop yourself from smiling fondly at Yoongi’s stance between Hoseok and an onslaught of self-blame. Entirely parallel of how he’s taken care of you through definitive speech assuring you that the trials you face aren’t create from your own error, Yoongi now glares at the idea that Hoseok put into the air. Obstinate against it when Hoseok tries to speak again and Yoongi instead voices, “Her misusing your feelings isn’t your fault.”

“I agree,” You say without realizing, watching the two of them glance back towards your direction when you inevitably bite your lip from speaking up. “Well,” Your word is nervous for a moment until you look at Yoongi and feel more sure. Finding Hoseok’s eyes again, you’re not doubtful as you try to back up Yoongi’s claim, “She shouldn’t have lied to the media in the first place just to save herself.”

“Oh, another addition to Yoongi’s hype squad for me?” Hoseok smiles gently as you finish your sentence, speaking his own with a jovial tone. You shrug, biting your lip and wondering shortly if you were too direct in how you spoke to him. “You know, when I heard he got tied into a fake relationship, I was kind of worried the person would be annoying.” You say nothing, instead biting your lip because initially you thought Yoongi hated you. “But you’re a nice person, Y/N. I’m glad it’s you.”

You grow silently surprised at Hoseok’s assessment of your character. Sending another glance in Yoongi’s direction that is matched by a tiny twist in your neck, you find him ready to meet you with just as tiny of a shrug. Slight smile almost floral in feeling. “He has to approve of even my fake girlfriends, I guess.” Yoongi explains in a gentle voice that’s sarcastic for Hoseok’s ears. You can’t help but smile in return as Yoongi’s words that play along imply in some ways that he thinks positively of you as well. Not that you doubted, but it is nice to see actively reinforced.

“I do!” Hoseok looks at Yoongi, nodding his head once in agreement, then back to you with a nod making full use of his chin to gesture to your person, “If Y/N hadn’t been cool, I would’ve gone and ruined more of my image trying to argue with your CEO.” Little bits of laughter escape your lips as you curl your knees further to your chest, comfortable with the two of them to feel like the conversation is wholly casual. “But I’ve bugged you both enough about my ex-- you both just woke up not too long ago, right? I’ll buy us lunch, let’s go out.”

You tense from surprise, your legs nearly kicking into yourself as you grip tighter when Hoseok all the sudden hops up from his seat on the couch. Pointing theatrically to you, then Yoongi, then himself, he speaks, “You both deserve it after dealing with my spiteful ex. I’ll drive too; let me just go to the bathroom real quickly.”

“You don’t have to join if you’re busy.” Yoongi tells you as Hoseok saunters down the hallway familiarly. You rest your chin on your knee thoughtful for a second to your calendar.

“I don’t have anything much to do anyways,” You mumble as you go over every hour as though your phone’s planner is in front of your eyes. “Oh-- but if you want it to be just the two of you…” Your voice trails off when Yoongi shakes his head, then leans it at an angle to rest against his palm. A smile plays at his lips when he speaks warmly,

“No, you can always feel free to tag along.” Your head nods unconsciously, finding his acceptance of your presence something to be proud of though you’re unsure why. Maybe because of how much you’ve looked up to his skills in your shares careers, maybe because of how much he’s helped you. Maybe because you enjoyed his company. “Ah,” He rubs his hair, somewhat light-hearted in voice as he adds sheepishly, “Well, I guess as long as you don’t mind pretending to be my girlfriend again though.”

You shrug, smiling towards Yoongi to assure him as you reply without a trace of disingenuity, “I’m used to it by now, Yoon.”

---

On a sunny day early in the following month, you sit sipping on an iced drink you picked up on the way to the company. Comfortably resting your arms on the pillow that sits on your crisscrossed lap, your head nods in tune with the beat of a song playing in soundproof headphones. In some moments to quickly place your cup to the coffee table, to scramble tiny notes on the notepad resting beside your thigh.

It’s the third time you’ve listened over the song in a row while Yoongi’s off finishing touch-ups on another song of his in the recording booth. Having spent the majority of the day in there, you brought along his preferred iced coffee drink that sits beside your own while you wait for him to come to his studio. Making use of the time, you’ve looked over the tiny playlist of in-progress tracks the two of you have messed around with for the past few weeks since the party.

Yoongi said you’re free to come to his studio whenever-- even gave you the passcode a while back-- justifying the great offer by saying he plans to release something from them so your help with any would be useful. You’re quite sure that in those stated truths also hid his way of giving you an outlet away from thinking of the collapse of your almost relationship with Jimin.

The method is effective to help, you’ve noticed. Along with Namjoon dragging you to his cafe to try concoctions he’s trying to decide on for future menus, while chatting with one another about nothing in particular, and Seokjin making all three of you do his random every-other-week activities, you’ve found the time outside of work filled well without giving you the time to dwell. And you’re thankful to the three of them for that. Especially considering Yoongi’s studio being a way to hideaway in the company itself.

It makes the hard to ponder memories invisible, though they’re left with the same mass. Undoubtedly something to cross again in time, but you think by then it’ll all be easier to handle. You’re hopeful of that idea.

In adding the finishing touch of notes for the current song, you watch a shadow envelope the paper you write on, but ignore Yoongi’s presence so the thought doesn’t leave. His shoes step in the corner of your peripherals, leading him to his chair as the last few lines of lyrics play in your ears. When you finally look up to see him, his hand is deep on top of his head, tossling locks of newly bleached hair as he sighs, though you can’t hear him. You remove his headphones to rest on your shoulders,

“Long session?” You question, reaching to swap your notepad with your drink, “Oh, I got you an Americano.” His head shifts at the mention of a deverage, and he rolls his seat over to grab it happily,

“Thank you-- need it.” Yoongi sips the beverage languidly through the straw, and you wonder if he actually went to sleep when he said he would the night before when you both were texting back in forth wrapped up in work independent of one another. “Yeah, I just couldn’t get the bridge to sound like I wanted.” Another sip disrupts the ice in the cup causing clatter. “Sorry, I took awhile.”

“I don’t mind.” You tell him, relaxing back into the couch where you stretch your legs out, catching the sight of different notifications on his computer as he wakes it. “Besides it’s not like any of the stuff we’re working on is legit.” Yoongi hums with the straw between his lips, lazily dragging his mouse around to check in on various emails and messages.

“Maybe if I could get my management team to ease up on the hardass image for me.” You notice the twinge in his calm tone while he ponders aloud, uncaring of how he disagrees with his public image. Trusting you with his complaints. “But either way, it’s nice making whatever without the pressure of releasing it eventually.”

You set your finished drink back on the coffee table, using a coaster still so the ice’s condensation doesn’t leave a ring. The idea of release sounds more inviting to your ears than you would like to admit, mainly because of how much you enjoy working on the tracks thus far. While Yoongi had the overall say due to the songs being ultimately his, they nonetheless have plenty of your touch mixed in that would likely be replaced in little bits if it were other producers working on them. At least in Yoongi’s case if something didn’t fit for him he’d tell you rather than letting you find out on the release date itself when you listen in along with the general public.

“By the way, I forgot to mention recently, but I’m going to be out of town for a couple of weeks.” Your head lifts stirring the hair framing your face. Yoongi returns the gaze, but the silence that takes over feels surprising to both of you. Subtle as it may be, there’s something disappointing about the news. “I have some fan meetings in a few countries to do around by debut anniversary time.” The explanation feels lackluster, not because it bothers him to go off to see fans-- Yoongi definitely enjoys connecting with those who listen to and support his work. You nod at his words, uncertain yourself of what to say.

Maybe it’s because the past couple of months you’ve seen him practically every day that the idea Yoongi will be gone for two weeks feels odd. In your head you question what you’ll do around the time spent working for the company. You’ll likely not even have to show up to work during that time, capable of doing everything from your apartment.

“What day do you leave?” You wonder how you never heard of his departure before this. Knowing fan meetings are organized well in advance, knowing that Yoongi wouldn’t have actually forgotten to mention it this far in.

“This coming Tuesday.” Six days off and he’s just now mentioning it. You nod again, considering why he waited so long. A type of consideration? You smile a little, ready to joke it off if you were wrong,

“Were you worried about telling me because I’d be alone here at the company?”

Yoongi shakes his head a little, not combating your question with light sarcasm or laughter, showing you that you’re at least some correct in your presumption. The drink you brought him gets placed beside his keyboard, Yoongi turning his chair towards you properly as he admits easily, “Not completely, but,” He shrugs, “It was a thought.”

“I’ll be okay.” Your voice sounds sure, and you feel the same energy. “Bit bored maybe.” Yoongi’s lips cast upwards into a smile, relaxed by your tone and feeling silly that he worried about it in the first place. “I’m used to kinda being on my own here anyways, and besides I have Joon and Jin to go bother if I get really bored.”

“And me.” Yoongi’s words follow the end of your sentence, firm in how he speaks to set the point across clearly. You pause, considering intention only for a second because it sounds different how he places himself into the group. “You don’t have to get bored, you can text or call whenever.”

You bite your inner cheek, trying to push back the tiniest flutter developing from how his voice sounds entirely gentle and sweet. Yoongi likely isn’t even aware of his effect, but like usual he’s a comforting presence. “Yeah, and you.”

Yoongi smiles when the outline of gratitude makes your own lips curl upright, but you duck your chin a little into the cover over the crossed arms you left perched atop your knees. He just continues in the soft expression, continuing along with a shrug, “Plus you know the code to my studio, so you can come in here whenever. I make it sound like I’m leaving for a year. So dramatic.” You giggle as Yoongi rubs the base of his neck and avoids eye contact for a moment because of sudden fluster emitting in his throat that he worries may escape visually onto his face.

“I should get you a cake or something for your debut anniversary.” You say to break away his embarrassment, though it’s a refreshing sight to witness. “I actually bake really well, isn’t that shocking?”

“So shocking since you burnt your leftovers in your oven the other day.” Your eyebrows furrow at his teasing tone while your lips pout at the memory. “You complained about it to me-”

“Anyways,” You cut him off with a smile to which Yoongi just shakes his head and chuckles. Reclining in his seat he listens to you continue brightly, “Vanilla cake with strawberry cream cheese frosting. It’ll be pink and pretty. Sound enticing?”

“It does in fact,” He nods slowly amused by your confidence in your baking capabilities. “You don’t need to though, it probably takes a lot of work.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine. Don’t be humble, you deserve it for seven years in the industry.” You point to yourself, trying to continue in the light-hearted banter while you reinforce, “Just think of it as a fan from day one giving her favorite artist a gift, okay?”

“Fan.” Yoongi laughs, finally reclaiming his iced Americano after many of the cubes melted to half their sizes. “I don’t think of you as a fan, that’s impossible,” Yoongi murmurs taking a long sip, as you audibly huff and think of a new way to put it. “But since you’re insisting then it’s okay. Don’t worry if you get too busy though.”

“I won’t, I’m pretty free other than business as usual around here.” You say happy to hear him verbally accept, even though you planned to make him the gift in any case. You sit back contemplating the shape while Yoongi just chuckles mumbling something to himself about you doing things however you like no matter what he says. “Oh,” You reconsider your calendar, biting your lip at the particular day coming up during Yoongi’s absence. Timely occurrence in retrospect.

“What?” Yoongi notices the change in your eyes that narrow as you think over your upcoming two weeks without him. You shake your head slightly, trying to rationalize the event. It’s just business and not something to worry about, but now that the time has come so much closer, the two options of what you could do play in your mind cluttering your thoughts from answering him for a minute. You eventually frown, stirring worried bubbles in Yoongi’s chest that don’t settle as you shake it away to smile up at him sheepishly,

“I just remembered I have a meeting to start discussing my contract renewal next Friday.”

Yoongi hears more of the ice in his drink clatter as it melts. The news is unexpected to his ears entirely having not known that your contract with SoundWave would end this year. He considers your job and how much anguish it gives you to be unable to have recognition for anything you do. He also considers Jimin’s presence and how much it likely hurts to see him around the company, to still work with him.

Realizing you’re much more talented than what this company deserves considering your treatment, Yoongi almost feels the need to tell you not to renew and leave. Find better work, but he knows that’s a gamble as unlikely as winning the lottery. Even if you leave there’s no certainty of work elsewhere, especially not to the degree that you receive presently. When your repertoire is practically empty of accomplishment. Despite Yoongi not being in your position, he feels trapped thinking of a way to change it.

“Are you going to renew?” Yoongi asks you gently, the question liken more closely to an accidental thought than a real inquisition. He watches in dismay as your shoulders simply shrug in response, understanding that the reality of the upcoming meeting will certainly bother you more than the ramifications of your situation with Jimin ending. If anything add greatly to it. And he’s not going to be around to help you with it in person.

“Yeah, I’m going to.” Your statement ends the drought of words. The information makes Yoongi’s shoulders tense, somewhat surprised that you already have an answer of what you plan to do. To the majority of people it’s the most logical, economical-- safe of the two choices available to you. But it feels constricting in his chest to hear you say those words.

Yoongi recalls Hoseok letting the media destroy his image and now watches you say you’re going to let your career go unnoticed because of SoundWave’s manipulation. Each situation is different, but watching his friends powerless to bigger forces around them makes Yoongi’s fists clench, irritated. He sighs to himself, really at a loss of what to tell you that could be of any use, because there’s really no contest between the two options.

Your ears pick up on the sound of Yoongi sighing in dissatisfaction. You know it’s not aimed at your choice, but likely the thoughts in his head that presently make him stare towards the wall with his eyebrows hardened. Like Namjoon, he doesn’t want you to come to that decision. But you have a feeling both know there’s little for you not signing the paper again.

You’re unwilling to give up doing what you love for a living, even if the situation isn’t ideal.

“I think,” You start timidly, watching Yoongi’s eyes flick towards you intently paying attention. “I’m probably going to take up your offer to call you a few times… So sorry in advance if I get annoying by doing it too much.”

“You won’t,” Yoongi brushes his bands from his face, head shaking at the idea and that you still worry about those kinds of things with him. “I like talking with you, it’s not going to bother me.”

“You like talking to me?” You repeat hearing that your voice sounds higher from the surprise-- flattered. Yoongi’s open mouth shuts, contemplating if the phrasing sounded weird, but he just shrugs and nods, once again avoiding eye contact for the sake of embarrassment.

“Yeah.” He just says, rubbing his face, “Well, we’re friends--why wouldn’t I?”

“Yeah,” You can’t stop the smile on your face despite the pink blossoming around the site, “I’m honored-”

“Don’t tease me.” You laugh at him cutting off your sentence with a tiny growl of words, thinking Yoongi seems really endearing when he’s flustered by things he clearly didn’t think through saying. “I was going to get you dinner to pay back for the drink, but now I don’t know if I want to.” You hear him speaking like a warning as you continue to laugh softly, all the while Yoongi stands and rubs his face.

“Dinner is equivalent to a three dollar Americano?” You watch him with a testing smile, voice light-hearted. Yoongi shrugs as he sits beside you on the couch, intending to finally see your notes on the songs you’ve been working on.

“If I buy at McDonald’s it is.”

if you enjoy please, please let me know via ask, comment, rb with tags-- however ! i’d just really appreciate feedback 🥺 i hope you enjoy the series, i’m working really hard on it! : )

tag list (send an ask to be added): @jaiuneamesolitaiire​ @tsvkino-usagi​@xionysus​​

[atelier-dayz]

Hello, Anon! (I put this as a separate text post because I needed the “read more” which doesn’t work for asks.)

So I’m not exactly the best person to ask for meta because my knowledge of Star Wars is relatively small compared to some people’s, but I can give it a shot?? Or at least a starting point of discussion coming from my opinion. (If you’re interested, jedi-order-apologist posted two good meta related to Qui-gon a while back here and here for better reads LOL)

I try very, very hard to not have a critical view of him. I really really do. I want to love Qui-gon. I do. When I first saw TPM, I thought he was cool. I’m still sad he died. But then one thing or another comes up and just *sigh* So here are the points about him that do make me critical about him? (There’s a TL;DR at the end if you find it too long.)

***Disclaimer: these are solely my opinions here. I am not the most knowledgeable in Star Wars by far. I base these solely off my experience and understanding of the movies, books, etc. Your mileage may vary***

First off, I should point out we don’t have much canon material of him to work off of. There’s The Phantom Menace and the book Master & Apprentice -- as well as some appearances in The Clone Wars I believe? I haven’t watched TCW yet. 

There’s also the Star Wars - Age of Republic: Heroes - Qui-gon comic, but it doesn’t reveal too much about his character, at least to me, other than showing him questioning the role and path of the Jedi and finding that balance is the key. *shrugs*

Anyways, from The Phantom Menace, we are made to understand that he’s the type of person to push the envelope, who apparently goes against the Council enough for Obi-wan to bring it up. We don’t get details on how he does it those times, only Obi-wan saying “[The Council] will not go along with you this time.” Which implies he has successfully argued his way before (or possibly gone his own way and asked for permission after?).

Being a rebel is not a bad thing. A lot of our media is all about being the rebel, going against the grain, and etc. However, some people in the fandom take that to mean it’s the only correct answer, and use that as an argument that the Jedi were awful people, who needed reform and didn’t deserve to live otherwise, and etc. But clearly, Qui-gon doesn’t disagree with the Jedi to the extent that he would leave them. He’s clearly still a Jedi and believes in the Jedi philosophy.

Qui-gon is a big follower of the Living Force, of focusing on the “here and now,” as he tells Obi-wan in the beginning of the movie. He’s squarely about the present and taking things as they come. -- And yet, he’s also remarkably fixated on the prophecy, which is very much not a matter of the present in my opinion. He is very insistent on Anakin being the Chosen One and therefore should be trained as a Jedi -- to the point where he say “I will do what I must.” So basically, it’s his way or the highway. He will take no other interpretation, even if there’s no concrete evidence that Anakin is the Chosen One.

My impression of him is that he will follow the way that he believes is correct or believes that the Force tells him is correct, and will leave no room for anything else. The casualty of this in TPM: Obi-wan. When Obi-wan warns him the Council won’t agree with him, Qui-gon tells him, “You still have much to learn, my young apprentice.” Fast-forward to later that SAME DAY, when he discovers the Council will not take on Anakin (based reasonably enough on the results of their testing and long-standing rules), he tries to claim Anakin as his padawan when Obi-wan, his actual padawan, is standing right there next to him. When the Council reminds him he has a padawan already, he pushes for Obi-wan’s Trials, and says, “He’s headstrong, and he has much to learn about the living Force, but he is capable. There is little more he will learn from me.” Obi-wan’s Trials was never something brought up before, from what I understand. He basically said hours before that Obi-wan wasn’t ready, and now he’s saying he is. I’m sure he doesn’t mean to hurt Obi-wan in this situation. He’s doing what he thinks he has to in order to have Anakin part of the Order. But it’s NOT COOL to throw away your existing apprentice at the expense of it. 

This whole fiasco of a scene is what has me very mad at Qui-gon a lot of times. Overall, it’s not a flattering view of him. As I like to say, his intentions are good, his execution is very very poor.

(He and Obi-wan later make up, but I for one am still upset at him on Obi’s behalf. Especially when Qui-gon’s final words later on is to train Anakin. That’s it. Doing what he must to make sure Anakin is trained. And Obi-wan will of course honor that request, which is a giant undertaking I personally believe he shouldn’t have been burdened with, having just lost his master and just become a new knight through combat. No one in his position would have been ready for that.)

(Addition: he also never mentions to the Council or even Obi-wan from the looks of it that Anakin was a slave. This, I honestly think, is critical information that should have been expressed. For whatever reasons, he did not mention it.)   

I can’t speak about his characterization in Master & Apprentice, because I haven’t read that book yet. (It’s on my shelf, I’ll get to it eventually!) I have been warned and heard that he is quite a frustrating character in it that makes you want to throw the book and go “DAMMIT QUI-GON.” So take that as you will.

All of this is just taking account of canon. If you take into account EU/Legends content, oh boy, is that even less flattering. Get ready Anon. I present to you, Jedi Apprentice. Otherwise known as “The reasons why Obi-wan has needed a nap and hugs since he was twelve.”)

So in Legends, there’s an age-cut off for becoming a padawan at 13. Obi-wan’s last chance at becoming a padawan was with Qui-gon as his master. Due to the trauma of his second padawan Falling, Qui-gon renounced his first padawan, who was already a Knight at this point, and had since refused any other padawans. (It is implied that he has crushed the dreams of many children, yes.) So Qui-gon summarily said no to Obi-wan. And due to a fight and wrongful accusations by a rival/bully, Obi-wan gets sent off early to Agricorps on Bandomeer (a whole mess of thing in itself, but I digress). Anyways, coincidentally, Qui-gon is also on the same ship to Bandomeer on a mission. After...a wild ride (and Qui-gon taking the time to shoot down Obi-wan’s hopes of becoming a Knight a second time) and multiple events (including Obi-wan ending up as a mining slave), Qui-gon waffles a bit about possibly taking Obi-wan as his padawan, and then there’s a whole confrontation involving Qui-gon’s Fallen former padawan that ends with Qui-gon officially taking Obi-wan as his apprentice after Obi-wan offers to blow himself up to help Qui-gon escape and save the miners. --- This naturally makes the Council scene in TPM even worse.

Fast-forward to Obi-wan’s second official mission with Qui-gon, they end up in the wartorn Melida/Daan, where they were to retrieve the injured Master Tahl (Qui-gon’s love interest). (Yes, his second mission. I’m not counting Phindar because that was a very unfortunate detour that turned into a mission. They went Bandomeer --> Phindar --> Gala --> Melida/Daan. No time skips that I picked up. Their ship to Melida/Daan was offered to them by Gala’s Queen.) Obi-wan felt that they needed to do more, that they needed to help the youth on the planet stop the fighting and achieve peace. Qui-gon wants to bring Tahl back to the Temple at once, and basically gives him an ultimatum...and then leaves his 13 year old barely new apprentice WITHOUT A LIGHTSABER in an ACTIVE WARZONE where the combatants have shown NO qualms in killing children OR Jedi. Qui-gon goes back -- eventually -- after Obi-wan messages for help, and after several events, takes Obi-wan back as his padawan. 

The other big strike against Qui-gon would again involve Master Tahl, in which after she is killed, he mourns her to the point of absolutely neglecting Obi-wan. I haven’t re-read that part yet, but yeah, that happened in the EU. 

So basically, in Jedi Apprentice, you get a good number of scenes where Qui-gon clearly cares for Obi-wan, is fond of him, etc. There are ways in which they connect with each other very well, and their thoughts reflect each other’s, which points to how they are in fact a good match as master and apprentice and is lovely to see. But he is also at times very uncommunicative and neglectful and...not a very good Master or someone that should be responsible for children by the looks of it. (All of which is probably rooted back to the trauma of his Fallen padawan.)

The whole caveat of all this is that these are all not canon now. These were also obviously books meant for kids, so when reading them as an adult, things become very very unflattering and there’s some hand-waving and logic that just makes you go UMM? 

The short of it: my main issues with Qui-gon are 1) in canon, throwing Obi-wan under the bus in that Council scene, 2) in EU, being at times a neglectful Master who shouldn’t have been responsible for children, and 3) unrelated to canon or EU but becoming more and more a big part of my negative feelings towards Qui-gon, the way certain parts of fandom choose to prop Qui-gon up on a pedestal as the One Good Jedi who knew better than the rest of the Jedi, and they build him up by wrongfully tearing down other characters.

[purgatoryandme]

I read your text about horror and it's not like I don't agree, but so I saw the tags and you were talking about TG and KS, and this last one in special I don't think could be really applied because the antagonist does not act in a sexual way because yes, I think the whole plot explores well what he does, and also the protagonist has mental illness, I know you were talking about the fandom, but even so I would like to know your opnion about the plot (if you read it).

I have read a chunk of KS since I’m a big horror fan. Several chapters (8?) in, I decided it wasn’t for me for a couple reasons I’m gonna sandwich together with what’s good about it. Though I’m gonna make one point up here: everything Sangwoo does is super sexual????? Bruh?????????????? He jacks off while hanging Bum???????First of all: KS does a great job of tension building. There’s an element of frantic anxiety to it that carries over to the reader incredibly well. Bum has an intriguing character introduction and interesting motivations for such a fast-paced story. I can see why some people consider it an enjoyable read, especially if they are relatively new to horror. SUPER LONG POST UNDER THE CUT

Unfortunately, the plot and character interactions are pretty cliche horror devices in both Japan and Korea imo? I’ve read dozens of other works with the same dynamics (a stalker and a killer, the hostage being treated as a mother, a killer killing their mother, etc) that did it better. The only (somewhat) unique thing that KS brings to the table is that the ‘stalker’ is a gay (or bi) man. Now, having a m|m relationship in a horror piece is something a lot of fans are celebrating, which I get? I guess? It’s always cool to see LGBT+ characters in central roles. However, it’s not exactly rare in Korean horror pieces, and…….Well the relationship is A) a cliche and B) kinda homophobic? There is a pretty big subset of Korean and Japanese horror that is centred on gay men in a super unflattering light. It has all the problems typical of yaoi (divided into feminine and masculine roles, treatment of the more feminine character as ‘not a real man’, the ‘straight until i met you’ trope, or ‘you look so much like a girl you seduced me’ trope). Then it makes it worse by heavily implying that the character is a deviant BECAUSE OF or in RELATION to their homosexuality. I don’t know if a lot of people on tumblr missed it because they’re from Canada or the States, but KS displays Bum’s actions as disgusting/shocking because he’s gay while simultaneously eroticizing them. It also treats Bum as a woman because he’s attracted to men. THIS IS A REALLY COMMON HOMOPHOBIC TROPE IN KOREAN LITERATURE, ESPECIALLY HORROR, AND SO, EVEN THOUGH ISOLATED SCENES CAN BE ARGUED AS “PART OF THE CHARACTER”, I AM FORCED TO VIEW THEM THROUGH THIS LENS.EXHIBIT A) Bum’s introduction

Bum’s narration was played to make the audience think he was a woman and the fact that he’s a man was played for shock.

The fact that he’s a man was introduced alongside the fact that he is a stalker, drawing an ugly comparison. With later information on Bum, the reader can assume that he simply thinks this negatively ABOUT HIMSELF and that the manga doesn’t share that opinion, however this was his introduction and sets the tone for the audience. Without knowing about Bum’s later rape and mistreatment, this entire scene plays out as “Bum is gross because he’s stalking a man”. 

Bum has also presumably stalked women and they were shown to respond to him with disgust, THOUGH THIS IS NOT MENTIONED AGAIN. However, further support for the narrative being homophobic comes in with Sangwoo.

A) Sangwoo only finds Bum desirable in women’s clothes/as a woman. Sangwoo’s victims are women who he finds sexually desirable and Bum is the exception. He literally dresses Bum in their clothing.

B) Sangwoo wants Bum to act as his mother.

(Incest-y vibes, abusive dads, being overly attached to a mother figure have all been conflated with sexual deviancy and homosexuality in Korean media constantly)

C) Sangwoo responds with disgust/alarm to Bum actually desiring to kiss him and about the entire situation actually being arousing which, while it could be attributed to shock considering how weird the situation is, we know Sangwoo is willing to fondle severely injured women. He’s also shocked about how into the…after portion he was.

D) Sangwoo openly mocks Bum for being gay (”a dude lover”). He implies that Bum cut himself “in relation to his homo tendency”.

E) Bum’s abuse is sexualized even before there’s sexual content. Sangwoo DOES act in a sexual way - both to his female victims and, originally, to Bum.

(This scene was all about porridge…that just happens to look like cum)

(Pushups? Seriously? This scene was played for eroticism)

(That’s shampoo! That looks like cum)

Legit though, Sangwoo is coded as the Straightest Dude Ever who is only willing to screw around with Bum because he is deviant (a murderer, willing to have sex with someone who he wants to act as his mother) and because Bum is female-coded in all the most degrading ways (weak, skinny, submissive, cries constantly, emotionally vulnerable, likes men). 

Even further common Korean homophobic tropes is the Bum was the victim of sexual assault by his uncle. SO MANY stories are like “oh xyz is gay because a gay person raped them”.

Going even further than that, Sangwoo picks up a man and, when faced with the idea of actually getting sexual with him, immediately responds with violence. Of course the guy is middle age, the patron of a gay bar, and coded to be a predator of younger men. Oh, and he’s married. Sangwoo flat out calls him (and Bum) disgusting.

TLDR: KS is a good tension builder that seems fun to read, but upon critical review lends itself heavily to homophobic tropes, is almost entirely sex-based/eroticized horror (that I really fucking hate on a personal level), and is something of a cliche. While not a terrible thing in and of itself, it’s the homophobic tropes / eroticized horror elements of this story that have helped create such a toxic fandom.

[sailorrrvenus]

What a Longer Focal Length Can Offer Your Street Photography

I started photography on perhaps the most popular focal length, 35mm, in the form of my RX1R, which I shot through my time at university. From there I moved to 50mm, which was a revolution to me in the way I saw and thought about my images. I now shoot the majority of my favorite images on a 90mm, which although not entirely unconventional is still far from the “standard.”

I thought it might be useful to share some of my thoughts and images on using a medium telephoto for street photography specifically, and perhaps help some of you to try a lens you may not necessarily associate with the genre you are trying to shoot.

Distance

The tighter nature of a 90mm lens by definition will affect the distance with which you are dealing with your subjects. It means you are often further from the action, allowing you to take in not only the scene but also vantage points and angles which you may have missed if you were in the thick of it with a wider lens.

It also means achievable candid portraits at close (but not too close) distances, as well as being able to play with that extra space between you and your subject that the distance gives you.

Less Aggressive

Being further from your subject in street photography means that you are less likely to be confronted when taking a specific person’s photograph. It is also easier to play off the idea that you were photographing something else if you do end up in a confrontation. You’re able to shoot people from directly in front of them from a few steps away, whereas with a wider length you would have to stand conversation-distance from them.

Personally, I prefer shooting dead on, as it has a more intimate feeling compared to images you can tell were taken just as someone walked past someone, awkwardly positioned to the side of the frame.

Low Distortion

Longer focal lengths are of course known for their main characteristic, which is that they produce a very distortion-free frame. This lies in contrast to the more “classic” 28mm/35mm focal lengths which are some of the most popular for street photography because of their wide field of view — however, the distortion can often bend reality in ways that don’t really add anything to the image and can be unflattering to subjects.

I feel like lens design especially in recent years has done a lot to combat the effects of distortion, and I’ve used some excellent 35mm lenses which could easily pass as 50s if not for the FOV.

That said, I prefer the rendering of the mid-telephoto, and the way it defines my subjects in a cleaner, more precise way.

Straighter Lines

When shooting subjects that lie on a dead plane across from me it is really great to have all constituent elements dead on with the edges of the frame Bendy lines can occur when a wide angle is even slightly off of the plane you are shooting on, leading to odd perspectives especially in an urban city environment where I mostly shoot.

Greater Depth of Field

There are some street photographers who I’m sure would argue that bokeh has no place in street photography, and that separation should be achieved through framing and figure to ground rather than defocusing the background. I mostly agree with this and feel that the majority of my street photographs are not “bokeh shots” however I still find that on purely aesthetic terms I do like when I’m able to incorporate it into an image.

Longer focal lengths naturally have shallower depth of field, and even when stopped down to f/11 I’m able to get fantastic separation between my subjects and backgrounds.

With shorter lengths, you would need a very wide aperture, or need to be very close in order to achieve the same effect.

Composing with the Foreground

I’ve been really enjoying finding elements in the foreground to help contextualize either the story or composition of my images. Usually with a 50mm, I would be close enough that my view of my scene would be unrestricted.

With a 90mm that extra distance means I can include things in the foreground that really help to guide the viewer’s eye. I also think it really helps to lend a voyeuristic feel to an image, as if you were a character looking over someone’s shoulder rather than simply seeing whatever the photographer wanted.

Easier Isolation

I shoot the majority of my images in portrait orientation because it is easier for me to “reduce down” a scene into a “slice” of an image in vertical form rather than horizontal. A longer lens does something similar, by giving me a smaller area to work with, and really finesse exactly what I don’t want to include.

For busier environments, this is invaluable, especially on film where I cannot crop in as much as I would be comfortable with my digital cameras.

Personal Preference

I find that so many people make the decision to shoot on a 35mm or even a 50mm simply because that’s what was recommended to them at the time of buying their camera. Gear recommendations can often become an echo chamber and people become disheartened when their state of the art camera and lens combination is not delivering the results they actually wanted.

Focal length can seem different for people who simply see differently, and sometimes a wider-angle lens just isn’t for you. That doesn’t mean you can’t shoot a specific genre, it just means you need to learn how to make a length you are comfortable with work for you.

All of these points should be balanced against some of the shortcomings, or negatives I have found with shooting longer lengths. Usually even a mid-telephoto lens will have greater weight and size compared with a standard “nifty” fifty. They will also usually have smaller maximum apertures, and with the wider f/2.8 and brighter you are looking at even heavier and expensive options.

When using a longer lens it can be harder to engage with your subject if that is your preferred method of shooting, and the distance from your subject can mean that you overlook details in things like their posture or expression that you would have caught had you been closer. 50mm and 35mm for portraits definitely allow for a more intimate shooting experience.

Although I love my 90mm, I maintain that 50mm (for me) is the most versatile lens for everyday use, and is the focal length I have shot the majority of my assignments in photojournalism as well as personal documentary. In street, however, my 90mm has been producing my best results for a while. It took me some time to become literate with the focal length but now I’m confident with it I will be using it in situations I wouldn’t have previously considered – even for close quarters photojournalism, where I would ordinarily use a 50mm.

I don’t think many people aside from other photographers will care much about what focal length you shoot, let alone what camera – the results themselves will always be what stays with them. I encourage you to try a longer focal length, especially if you feel uninspired by images in the 28-50 ranges, but you may equally find that a 15mm is what gives you the most keepers. It takes a lot of trial and error before discovering a method that works to produce the images you enjoy, and I don’t think there is an easy way other than simply committing to applying that trial and error to as many options as possible.

About the author: Simon King is a London based photographer and photojournalist, currently working on a number of long-term documentary and street photography projects. The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author. You can follow his work on Instagram and you can read more of his thoughts on photography day-to-day over on his personal blog. Simon also teaches a short course in Street Photography at UAL, which can be read about here.

source https://petapixel.com/2019/03/08/what-a-longer-focal-length-can-offer-your-street-photography/

[pauldeckerus]

What a Longer Focal Length Can Offer Your Street Photography

I started photography on perhaps the most popular focal length, 35mm, in the form of my RX1R, which I shot through my time at university. From there I moved to 50mm, which was a revolution to me in the way I saw and thought about my images. I now shoot the majority of my favorite images on a 90mm, which although not entirely unconventional is still far from the “standard.”

I thought it might be useful to share some of my thoughts and images on using a medium telephoto for street photography specifically, and perhaps help some of you to try a lens you may not necessarily associate with the genre you are trying to shoot.

Distance

The tighter nature of a 90mm lens by definition will affect the distance with which you are dealing with your subjects. It means you are often further from the action, allowing you to take in not only the scene but also vantage points and angles which you may have missed if you were in the thick of it with a wider lens.

It also means achievable candid portraits at close (but not too close) distances, as well as being able to play with that extra space between you and your subject that the distance gives you.

Less Aggressive

Being further from your subject in street photography means that you are less likely to be confronted when taking a specific person’s photograph. It is also easier to play off the idea that you were photographing something else if you do end up in a confrontation. You’re able to shoot people from directly in front of them from a few steps away, whereas with a wider length you would have to stand conversation-distance from them.

Personally, I prefer shooting dead on, as it has a more intimate feeling compared to images you can tell were taken just as someone walked past someone, awkwardly positioned to the side of the frame.

Low Distortion

Longer focal lengths are of course known for their main characteristic, which is that they produce a very distortion-free frame. This lies in contrast to the more “classic” 28mm/35mm focal lengths which are some of the most popular for street photography because of their wide field of view — however, the distortion can often bend reality in ways that don’t really add anything to the image and can be unflattering to subjects.

I feel like lens design especially in recent years has done a lot to combat the effects of distortion, and I’ve used some excellent 35mm lenses which could easily pass as 50s if not for the FOV.

That said, I prefer the rendering of the mid-telephoto, and the way it defines my subjects in a cleaner, more precise way.

Straighter Lines

When shooting subjects that lie on a dead plane across from me it is really great to have all constituent elements dead on with the edges of the frame Bendy lines can occur when a wide angle is even slightly off of the plane you are shooting on, leading to odd perspectives especially in an urban city environment where I mostly shoot.

Greater Depth of Field

There are some street photographers who I’m sure would argue that bokeh has no place in street photography, and that separation should be achieved through framing and figure to ground rather than defocusing the background. I mostly agree with this and feel that the majority of my street photographs are not “bokeh shots” however I still find that on purely aesthetic terms I do like when I’m able to incorporate it into an image.

Longer focal lengths naturally have shallower depth of field, and even when stopped down to f/11 I’m able to get fantastic separation between my subjects and backgrounds.

With shorter lengths, you would need a very wide aperture, or need to be very close in order to achieve the same effect.

Composing with the Foreground

I’ve been really enjoying finding elements in the foreground to help contextualize either the story or composition of my images. Usually with a 50mm, I would be close enough that my view of my scene would be unrestricted.

With a 90mm that extra distance means I can include things in the foreground that really help to guide the viewer’s eye. I also think it really helps to lend a voyeuristic feel to an image, as if you were a character looking over someone’s shoulder rather than simply seeing whatever the photographer wanted.

Easier Isolation

I shoot the majority of my images in portrait orientation because it is easier for me to “reduce down” a scene into a “slice” of an image in vertical form rather than horizontal. A longer lens does something similar, by giving me a smaller area to work with, and really finesse exactly what I don’t want to include.

For busier environments, this is invaluable, especially on film where I cannot crop in as much as I would be comfortable with my digital cameras.

Personal Preference

I find that so many people make the decision to shoot on a 35mm or even a 50mm simply because that’s what was recommended to them at the time of buying their camera. Gear recommendations can often become an echo chamber and people become disheartened when their state of the art camera and lens combination is not delivering the results they actually wanted.

Focal length can seem different for people who simply see differently, and sometimes a wider-angle lens just isn’t for you. That doesn’t mean you can’t shoot a specific genre, it just means you need to learn how to make a length you are comfortable with work for you.

All of these points should be balanced against some of the shortcomings, or negatives I have found with shooting longer lengths. Usually even a mid-telephoto lens will have greater weight and size compared with a standard “nifty” fifty. They will also usually have smaller maximum apertures, and with the wider f/2.8 and brighter you are looking at even heavier and expensive options.

When using a longer lens it can be harder to engage with your subject if that is your preferred method of shooting, and the distance from your subject can mean that you overlook details in things like their posture or expression that you would have caught had you been closer. 50mm and 35mm for portraits definitely allow for a more intimate shooting experience.

Although I love my 90mm, I maintain that 50mm (for me) is the most versatile lens for everyday use, and is the focal length I have shot the majority of my assignments in photojournalism as well as personal documentary. In street, however, my 90mm has been producing my best results for a while. It took me some time to become literate with the focal length but now I’m confident with it I will be using it in situations I wouldn’t have previously considered – even for close quarters photojournalism, where I would ordinarily use a 50mm.

I don’t think many people aside from other photographers will care much about what focal length you shoot, let alone what camera – the results themselves will always be what stays with them. I encourage you to try a longer focal length, especially if you feel uninspired by images in the 28-50 ranges, but you may equally find that a 15mm is what gives you the most keepers. It takes a lot of trial and error before discovering a method that works to produce the images you enjoy, and I don’t think there is an easy way other than simply committing to applying that trial and error to as many options as possible.

About the author: Simon King is a London based photographer and photojournalist, currently working on a number of long-term documentary and street photography projects. The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author. You can follow his work on Instagram and you can read more of his thoughts on photography day-to-day over on his personal blog. Simon also teaches a short course in Street Photography at UAL, which can be read about here.

from Photography News https://petapixel.com/2019/03/08/what-a-longer-focal-length-can-offer-your-street-photography/