#there's so many words - thoughts - geared towards or from knives that has left me the most emotionally distraught

[ruporas]

I fucking love the way u expand on every art piece u post with bootiful indepth character analysis. But i have to ask,May I have some art or a wonderful character analysis of our lord and executioner knives aka million knives? -what a stupid ass fucking name- or atleast what u think of him.

oh god LOL i can never do a justifiable knives character analysis. i care and love his character a lot, but my beef with him is so personal. i can say though, his emotional aspect is my favorite part of his character because there's a lot of instances where he's calm and collected for like 5 seconds and then he just breaks instantly with a single word or action. the fact it's a blatant trait since when he was a kiddie that gets further emphasized throughout the years with his ambition and reactions towards vash's choices… i like that he's presented as someone who chooses absolutes and can't - won't change despite his own loneliness and potential regrets that he's tried to bury. i looooove how he's drawn in trimax and how sleepy he is all the time, probably because he hasn't relaxed in 150 years.

and it might be obvious by now, but i'm specifically fond of trimax knives and the dynamic he has with vash in that iteration… i like the extra care the studio put into his character, but trimax just hits more for me.

anyway, here's a knives sketch!! thank you for sending this and for your kind words <3

[pedrito-friskito]

strawberry wine - joel miller x ofc!liv stone/fem!reader

during - part fourteen

series masterlist | main masterlist | read on ao3

life goes on, for a time.

a/n: a BIG one wowowowowow okay the end of this one fully got away from me and I was possessed by SOMETHING but idk man fuckin’ enjoy, more on the way, thank you always for the love 🤍

word count: 6.4k

warnings: MY BLOG IS 18+, MINORS DNI, angst, backstory, canon typical violence and injuries, death/murder, guns, knives, drinking, some rough sex, ass-play, spit-play (POSSESSED I TELL YOU), joel miller is a menace and so am I.

✨follow @friskito-library for updates on new chapters/works!✨

You keep going.

It’s easier, honestly, that it’s ever been before. There had been so many moments, between the outbreak and seeing Joel again at that gas station, where you didn’t know if you could keep going, if there was enough left to make you want to.

Deanna had her ways, yanking you out of it more often that not with a bottle of gin and a you keep your chin up, girl. And the kids — well, one toothy grin from Emily or a cheesy joke from Henry and you knew you had more in you. Nick helped some too, though he was more of a distraction than a solution, something infinitely more evident to you now, to you both.

You’d hurt him, ending it finally, completely, the way you did, and his reaction had cut you deep, but it had to be done. You couldn’t keep up a charade, and in retrospect, yes, maybe you should have waited, stopped yourself from falling into Joel’s arms (and bed) again until you’d told Nick what was happening, but…

I can’t love anyone the way I love him.

It’s always gonna be him.

It would have unfolded the way it did no matter what.

It’s Joel. It’s always gonna be Joel.

And despite the guilt you chase away with deep kisses and glasses of liquor, it’s easier, to keep going. It almost feels…normal, in a way you haven’t felt in a long fucking time.

+

Life is still bleak as hell; there’s no getting around that. FEDRA’s been kicking into high gear in Boston, handing out punishments more than ration cards, refusing people at the gates, falling back on some bullshit about overpopulation, that there’s not enough food or beds or resources for any more people. 

You’ve heard rumours that the QZ in Philadelphia was overrun, that the reason there have been so many survivors at the Boston gates is because they fled to the closest QZ still standing. You’ve heard rumours about Kansas City, that FEDRA’s become more ruthless there than anywhere else in the country, that getting caught out past curfew gets you hung rather than beaten. Or worse.

Joel moves in, officially. Not that he has that many things to move into your apartment, but his clothes take up space in your closet, his toothbrush beside yours, and you wake up beside him every morning. You let yourself get used to it, to feeling his breath on the back of your neck when the sun comes up, arm slung around your waist, always keeping you fit against him while you sleep. It’s nice. It’s really fucking nice.

Joel and Tommy take the handyman jobs in the apartment buildings, and you and Tess try to stick together, taking the same gigs more often than not. You pool your resources, and the three of them are quick to offer up help to support the kids, to take the pressure off you and Deanna. You’re grateful as all hell, and so is Deanna, despite her relatively grouchy demeanour towards you, ever since you told her you ended it with Nick, officially.

You thought she’d understand, to a degree. It had taken nearly a half bottle of gin in the early days of the QZ, but she’d gotten the full story out of you, the epic love affair of Joel Miller and Liv Stone, the unfettered version. You’d fallen asleep on her couch covered in tissues that night, woke up with the worst hangover you’d had since you were eighteen and got drunk with Anna on wine coolers over Spring Break. Deanna had offered you some sympathy, then.

But now, she’s been taking your — could you even call it a breakup? — your severance from Nick a little too harshly.

“He’s the reason I was in lockup the night Angie beat the shit out of me,” you’d reminded her, feeling a twinge in your side at the memory. “Or did you forget that?”

“Don’t bullshit me, Liv,” she’d thrown back, her face the harshest you’d ever seen it. “He put you in lockup to smuggle your friends through the gate. I’m not a fucking idiot. Don’t try and blame that on him. You got your ass kicked cuz you pissed Angie off, plain and simple. That’s not on Nick.”

“Oh, so then I should blame you?” You’d thrown a hand in her direction, and she’d glared so hard you thought she was gonna burn a hole through your skull. “I pissed off Angie trying to get those meds for Henry, which you asked me to do. So if you wanna start pointing fingers, start looking in the mirror.”

“You’re saying you wouldn’t have gotten the meds for Henry?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“You can’t talk yourself out of this, Liv. You knew what you were doing with Nick, all five fucking years. You knew exactly what you were—”

“It’s Joel!” you’d nearly screamed, tears crawling up your throat. “I never thought I’d see him again. It’s a second fucking chance, Deanna. I can’t waste that. I won’t. And I was as honest as I could be with Nick from the start. He knew about Joel, he knew I still loved him, he knew I couldn’t ever love him the way I love Joel. I never once told him I could.”

“Oh, and that makes it all better?”

“I know that I hurt him. But he hurt me, too, in case you give a shit. I know that I did a terrible fucking thing, I’m a terrible fucking person, and I’ll feel guilty about it forever, but it’s Joel. And I just…I can’t do anything else.”

She’d stared at you long and hard then, not so harsh a glare as before. She put her hands on her hips, boot tapping against the floor. “I have to go get the kids from school. Just…I’ll see you Friday, for dinner.”

You just nodded, swallowing hard, the tears retreating. “Friday.”

“Bring Joel.”

“Okay.”

(Dinner had been awkward as hell, to start. The kids had stared Joel down for the first hour, but by the time the table was being set, Emily was showing off her latest drawings and Henry was trying to rope Joel into a game of Monopoly. You helped Deanna with dinner, and while she was mostly quiet, before you left that night, she hugged you tight and whispered: “You’re not a bad person, Liv. You’re not.”)

After your official reconciliation with Joel — and subsequent fallout with Nick — Tess was the next person you went to. She stood firmly by the conversation you’d had in the food bank, kept to her agreement to join up with you to smuggle, and that was that.

You can’t force his hand in this.

Maybe I can.

You knew she had — Joel had given you the brief version of their conversation — and you were grateful, but it was just another thing you felt guilty for.

“You don’t have to,” she says to you. You’re outside the wall, heading for the hotel a few blocks out of the QZ, to scope out your route. Your drop is almost at the city limits, with some smugglers from Hartford, ones you’d happened across on the radio. You’ve been spending more time with Abe in the radio room in your spare time, trying to make as many new connections as you can. “Feel guilty, I mean. I didn’t give him to you. He was never mine to give. I knew that from the start.”

“What d’you mean?”

“He says your name in his sleep. I thought he was just mumbling for the longest time — y’know, Liv, live — then I figured it out. I asked Tommy once, but he wouldn’t tell me anything. And well, I know the rest now.”

You chew at your lip, bat swinging lightly in your grip, adjusting the backpack strap on your shoulder. Your bags are mostly empty; you’re anticipating a good food drop from the Hartford people, and they’d asked mainly for drugs in return, which you were happy to supply. You still have some left from the Providence drop, before Joel and Tess had showed up. It feels like a year ago, not a few weeks.

“I don’t want to be the reason you’re alone, Tess.”

“I’m not alone,” she tells you quickly, an actual smile on her face. “I have you. And Tommy. And Joel, still, in a different kind of way. It doesn’t matter. Life’s too fucking short, and I couldn’t…” She trails off, shakes her head, shrugs her shoulders. “I’m not alone.”

You shoot her a glance, seeing the way her thumb is rubbing at the wedding ring still on her finger. It’s her nervous habit, you’ve noticed. “We’ll find you someone,” you say, almost jokingly, trying to lighten the mood, elbowing her gently. “I’ll set you up, add QZ matchmaker to my resume.”

Tess barks a laugh. “Please, god, just no fucking FEDRA soldiers, yeah? I don’t think I could deal with the amount of testosterone that fucker Cowan is carrying around.” She squints at you, turning to you slightly. “Tell me he was at least good in bed. He must have been, for you to put up with that bullshit.”

You force yourself to laugh in return, staring at the ground ahead, kicking pieces of debris from your path. “He was much nicer, when it was just me and him. And I hurt him bad.” You shrug, sighing. “It’s the past but he…yes, to answer your question, he was very good in bed.”

“As good as Joel?”

You nearly choke, sputtering out an actual laugh at her bluntness. “You really want me to answer that?”

“Hey, it’s just us out here.”

“No one’s as good as Joel,” you say, and she throws her head back with a louder laugh. “Best I ever had. Ever. In my life.”

Tess just keeps laughing, pulls the knife from her belt and taps it against your bat. “Amen to that.”

The conversation wanders as you walk. She tells you a bit more about Baltimore, the few smuggling jobs they’d pulled before they’d gotten kicked out of the QZ. Turns out, her plans had been similar to yours: get a FEDRA soldier on her side, entice them with the goodies she smuggled in, threaten them with blackmail. Rinse and repeat. And it worked, for a time.

“There was this one guy, Anderson. Joel never liked him, and really, neither did I, but he was one of the first we got to agree to help. And…you know, Cowan actually reminds me of him.” She huffs a laugh. “That’s probably why I hate him, just out of fucking principle.”

“You don’t have to hate him.”

“He’s FEDRA, he put you in lockup, and he’s a jackass.”

“I also cheated on him, technically.”

She shrugs, giving you a conspiratorial grin. “Best you ever had? You did what you had to.”

You just laugh, but the sound feels hollow.

“Liv,” Tess says, and you stop short, turning towards her when she grabs your arm. “Jokes aside, I just…I get it. Why you did what you did. I know you feel guilty, and I know Cowan said some shitty things to you, but…we do terrible things, sometimes. To survive.”

You scoff. “That’s the understatement of the fucking century.” With a sigh, you push forward, gravel crunching under your boots, and Tess follows suit. “Joel said that too. That he did some terrible shit out there to survive. That we’re not the same as we were. And we’re not. I’m not.”

“Yeah, well, the world hasn’t exactly left much room for shit to stay the same, has it?”

The bat swings in your grip, and you let the tip knock against the toe of your boot. “Not so much. Never thought it would turn me into a killer, mind you. But…we do terrible shit, right?” You glance at her from the corner of your eye, feeling her gaze locked on you. “And no, I’m not just talking about Infected.”

Tess nods, slowly, her throat bobbing. “I…I shot that soldier, Anderson. First FEDRA soldier I ever killed, probably won’t be the last. But, it was either me or him, and I shot first. Then again, cuz the first one didn’t kill him.” Her brow is hard, fingers twitching over the gun strapped to her thigh. “It was either me or him.”

You nod, and the memory is rising in your throat and spilling off you tongue before you can stop it.

It was early days, just after the wall was completed, when restlessness got the better of you and you wanted — no, needed — to get out of the QZ, just for a while. There were fewer connections, back then, less people out in the open, more dead on the roads. You didn’t like Geoff from the get-go, something about him just made you feel super fucking uncomfortable, like every word out of his mouth was drenched in grease. But, you didn’t know any better, back then, and you wanted to believe a deal was a deal.

“He set me up,” you tell Tess, tightening your grip on the bat. Retelling the story makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up. “He’d managed to get a few Infected locked inside this old hair salon, and threw me to the wolves, basically. Took the bat from me. I got fucking lucky; there was a straight razor left in one of the drawers, and I took them both down. It was the first time I’d killed one since the outbreak.”

“What happened to Geoff?”

“Once I got away, found him a couple hours down the road, got his gun off him and put a bullet in his head, got my bat back. I figured if he kept going, he’d just try and screw the next person he made a deal with, and on and on it would go. I had to end it.”

Tess nods. “You did what you had to.”

You scoff. “That’s not the worst part.”

After Geoff, you got jumpy. You didn’t want to let up on the smuggling, and you were still trying to find new connections, but you took more precautions. You brought a gun every time now, along with the bat. You only met in locations you chose, and refused anyone who tried to persuade you to go somewhere else. You didn’t trust people; you couldn’t.

“This guy, Eric, he just rubbed me the wrong way that day. He wasn’t a bad guy, per se; I knew he ran with some shitty people but he didn’t seem so bad. He met me down in the subway, simple ammo trade.” You blow out a breath. “I thought he was reaching for a gun, and I pulled the trigger before he could. Like you said: it was either him or me. And I chose me.”

You pause, waiting for Tess to say it again. You did what you had to.

“Three days later, his wife shows up at the gate, asking if he’d come through, toting this little boy that was a dead fucking ringer for his dad. I thought I was seeing a ghost.” You bite down on the inside of your cheek. “They still live in Boston. Her son is the same age as Emily.”

It’s a few minutes, before Tess has anything more to say. “You couldn’t have known.”

“You’re right,” you agree, nodding. “I couldn’t. But it still doesn’t hurt any less. When they’re infected, it’s easier. Almost. I sometimes wonder if they’re still…them inside, but same thing. It’s either you or them, and you have to decide. You do what you have to — even if it’s terrible — to stay alive. To survive.”

Tess opens her mouth to say something in response, but all hell breaks loose before she can get a word out.

You’ve turned down the road the hotel is on, and there are cars everywhere, craters in the earth from the bombings, debris and decay everywhere you look. The bullets ring out from behind the vehicles, and you grab Tess by the handle of her backpack, yanking her behind a nearby truck. The gunfire makes it rattle. “Fuck!”

“These the guys from Hartford?”

“Shouldn’t be. We’re not even close to the city limits yet.”

When you chance a look around the truck, your heart jumps into your throat. There’s at least five of them, all with dark-coloured bandanas covering the lower halves of their faces, two of them closer than the rest. Guns drawn, scores of ammo hanging from their belts. You adjust your grip on the bat just as Tess screams, and you turn to see her being pulled away, one of the raiders yanking her by the hair. You shout as one tries to grab you the same, but you slip out of reach, swinging the bat. It makes contact with his knees, a loud crunch making you flinch. He falls like a rock and you pull your knife out quickly, slamming the blade into his skull.

You do what you have to.

Abandoning the bat for the moment, you grab the guy’s gun, averting your eyes from his face. It’s an automatic, and you pop up from behind the truck, taking aim and pulling the trigger. The three that hadn’t advanced don’t stand a chance, bodies falling before they have the chance to shoot back at you. 

The one holding Tess is trying to pull her into one of the storefronts along the side of the road.

“Hey!” you shout, the word nearly a growl. “Let her go, asshole!”

The guy turns, seeing his fallen comrades, and fumbles. It’s just enough for Tess to get her knife out and swing upwards. It ends up lodged in his throat rather than his head, and he drops awkwardly, clawing at his throat, blood pouring around his fingers. Bile rises in your throat, and you breathe slow as he hits the ground. Tess pulls her gun out a moment later, and the gunshot echoes through the road.

You sprint over to her, each of you giving the other a once over. “You good?”

“Fine. You?”

“Fine.”

“Who taught you to shoot like that?”

You actually laugh this time. “Cowan.”

Tess’s jaw drops. “Motherfucker.”

You collect all the guns and ammunition you can carry. One of the raiders has a nice-looking bowie knife on his belt, and you take it, sheath and all. Tess makes the rounds, filling her bag with ammo, while you try and leave some space; you still have to make it to the edge of the city.

Being as heavily armed as you now are earns you some weird looks from the Hartford smugglers once you reach the city limits. The chain link fence that was once the only thing standing between you and getting the hell out of Boston has not done well over the years. The metal is cut in a million more places, bent in others, no doubt the result of years of Infected climbing over, survivors trying to make it to the QZ gates. When you explain what happened, the leader — the one you’d been dealing with over the radio, a tall woman named Gwen — softens. “We lost a few of our own to raiders in New Haven. Shit’s getting dark.” She sighs. “Darker than it already was.”

The deal goes easily, which you’re grateful for. You throw in one of the guns and some ammo you pilfered from the raiders to sweeten the deal, and Gwen returns your generosity with some of her own: a carton of eggs. Fresh ones. It’s been a while now, since the Boston food bank has had anything fresh that wasn’t an apple or a tomato. Meat was becoming more and more scarce, and so were eggs. The ones Deanna used for breakfast were the powdered kind, sat like a lead weight in your stomach no matter how much coffee you washed them down with.

“If you have eggs, does that mean…chickens?” Tess asks, curiosity dripping from her voice, and you can’t help the way your stomach growls at the thought of chicken wings. 

Gwen laughs. “I’m not having the chicken or the egg debate with you, but yes, there are chickens. I don’t suppose you have seeds, in Boston? Fruits, veggies?”

“We do,” you nod.

“Bring us some next time, and we’ll bring you one of the hens in return.”

You and Tess debate the best way to cook a chicken all the way home.

+

Once you’re safely back in the QZ, you and Tess unload the guns in one of your caches, head back to the apartments to divvy the food up between you and Joel’s apartment, Tess and Tommy’s, and Deanna’s. She goes to take the food up to Deanna, and you pull out the bowie knife you’d nicked.

It’s as good an olive branch as any.

You find Nick out on patrol, standing outside the same alleyway you’d stopped in when Tommy had arrived in Boston, when Nick told you Deanna was looking for you. At first, he makes no indication he’s even noticed you, his eyes trained forward, hands glued to his gun, his jaw set.

“I know you don’t want to see me,” you say, your voice low, forcing yourself to look casual. “But, there’s something I want to say. Need to. Please?”

After a beat, Nick turns, his face still schooled blank, but when you step after him, deeper into the alley, the mask cracks. “What?”

“This is for you,” you say, pulling the bowie knife out from where you’d stashed it in your jacket.

Nick told you once, about a gift he’d received from his father, when he first joined the army. A knife, similar to the one you now hold towards him. The blade was engraved with his family name, the date he enlisted, sheathed in fine leather. He lost it, on Outbreak Day, in a fight with an Infected soldier.

“It’s…I know, it doesn’t make up for what I did. I don’t think anything can. But I just…I want you to know that I’m sorry, truly sorry, and if hating me makes you feel better, then that’s okay. But I never meant for things to turn out this way. And what I said before, about Joel, it’s the truth, but I never wanted to hurt you like I did, and I hope you know that.”

He takes the knife from you, pulls the blade from the sheath, the muscle in his jaw ticking as he inspects it. “Where’d you get this?”

“Does it matter?”

Nick scoffs a laugh. “If I had a dollar for every time you’ve said that to me.”

“I’m sorry, Nick,” you say, nearly reaching a hand out to him, but stopping yourself. “I really am.”

After a long moment, he nods, still staring down at the knife. “I only ever wanted you to be happy, Liv. To be safe. And if that fucking…if Joel is the one to do that, then I have to be okay with that.” He swallows so hard you can see his throat bob. “It’ll take some damn time, but I’ll…I’ll get there, I think. I’ll try. Just don’t expect me to be friends with him, yeah?”

You laugh. “I don’t. I just…I am sorry, Nick. I feel like a broken record, but…”

“It helps,” he says with a nod.

“Good.” It feels awkward, suddenly, and you take it as your cue to leave. “I’m gonna go.”

“See you around,” he says, and you just nod, heading towards the street, out of the alley. “Hey, Liv?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re not a bad person. You did a shitty thing, but you’re not a bad person.”

The corner of your mouth twitches. “Thanks, Nick.”

He nods again, and you turn on your heel, heading back towards the apartments.

+

Time moves on. 

Nick still keeps his distance, but he doesn’t look at you with sheer hatred in his eyes anymore, so that’s nice. Deanna learns you’ve made peace with each other, and tells you you did good. It helps. The guilt still lingers a bit, but it helps. 

You keep up your smuggling, bringing Tess and Joel and Tommy — and any combination of the three — along with you every time. You teach them your routes, your hiding spots, where your caches are. Joel’s impressed, if not a little hesitant, Tommy of a similar mind. Tess remains firm that you’re a badass, and is always the first to volunteer to come with you.

You’re all still quiet, about your pasts, about the time leading up to the four of you being in Boston together. Except for what Tess told you, the story you returned — one she swore she wouldn’t pass on to Joel, one you knew you had to tell him yourself.

You will, in time. You know you have to. But…you’re not there yet. And in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t fucking matter.

None of it does.

Before you know it, it’s been nearly six months since they arrived, and you decide to celebrate, the only way you can in the QZ: food and booze.

“Family dinner?” Joel repeats, his hands on his hips, head cocked to the side. It’s early in the morning, you’re both getting ready to head out, pulling on clothes and shoving feet into boots. You usually sleep fully dressed, boots and all, but Joel’s tendency to get you naked has become a nightly occurrence, and sometimes you’re too worn out to redress when you’re done.

You turn on your heel, head for the kitchen, opening one of the cabinets and pulling out a jar of tomato sauce and setting it on the counter. Joel’s close behind, grabbing the jar when you put it down, smirking down at the label. “Look familiar?”

His jaw twitches, something nostalgic in his eyes. “Same shit I used to buy in Texas.” He smirks, setting it down again, sliding his arms around your waist. “Didn’t we make spaghetti, at my place? What was that, our second date?”

You lean back against him, covering his hands with yours, lacing your fingers together. “I made spaghetti; you tried to make risotto.”

“That’s right,” he agrees and his hands move to your hips, turning you to face him. “That was the first night we—”

“Uh-huh,” you cut him off, leaning up on your toes until your mouth brushes his. “It was.”

Joel slides his hands up under your shirt, palms curling around your ribs, giving you a hungry kiss. “And now you expect me to sit through dinner with…?”

“Tommy and Tess.”

He growls, ducking his head to bury his face in your neck. “To sit through dinner with my brother and Tess, thinking about that the whole time.”

You hum, tangling a hand in his hair. “I’ll be thinking about it too, if it’s any consolation. I’m always thinking about it.”

“You’re gonna be the death of me, woman,” he groans, nipping at your throat.

You’re both late, Tess giving you a pointed look when Joel pecks you goodbye when you meet her out front. “I swear, you two are worse than teenagers sometimes,” she mumbles, and you just laugh.

The day goes quickly — you and Tess each work a shift in the donation hall, which you’re told is shutting down, and the food bank — and before you know it, you’re back at the apartment, putting pots on the stove, pulling a bottle of whiskey from the space behind the fridge. 

You and Tess are already a little sauced by the time Joel and Tommy come through the door. Tommy has paint smeared on his cheek and Joel is laughing, that kind of belly laugh you haven’t heard since Austin. You grin as he kisses you hello, Tommy pecking your cheek once Joel disappears towards the bedroom to get changed. “Kisses from all the Millers,” you laugh, stirring the sauce on the stove. “Aren’t I a lucky gal.”

Joel pokes his head out of the bathroom, brow furrowed. “Pardon?”

Tess laughs with you, pulling the chair beside her out for Tommy to sit. She slides him a glass of whiskey a second later. “What the hell is on your face, man?”

“Ah, hell.”

The evening passes so comfortably, you wonder if you’re dreaming, for a moment or two. The boys both won’t shut up about how delicious your spaghetti is — even though the pasta is the flourless crap FEDRA hands out, your sauce more than makes up for it — and it’s not long before you’ve polished off the bottle of whiskey between the four of you. Your chest feels warm, from the alcohol, the good food, the company.

Once you’re all done eating, Tommy produces a deck of cards and convinces you all to play a few rounds of euchre. You and Tess team up and kick the boys�� ass, to the point where Joel declares you must be cheating, which Tess is having none of. “Never thought you’d be a sore loser, Miller!”

The game changes from euchre to war, and Tess and Tommy make their own rules, deciding to smack the table as hard as they can when the card matches, even if the other’s hand is already there. It has them both howling after a couple rounds, you and Joel just chuckling as you watch. Joel slides your chair closer to his, close enough that he can loop an arm around your neck, hauling you against his chest.

He buries his nose in your hair as you lean against him, moving down until his mouth is close to your ear. “How much longer we gonna entertain these two, hmm? I need you all to myself, baby. Need to be inside you.”

Your thighs clench, cheeks flaring with heat, and you smack him in the chest, burying your face in the collar of your shirt.

He just chuckles in your ear, low as anything. “You like that, huh, baby? You gonna let me fuck you, aren’t you? Always so good for me. Promise, I’m gonna make you feel so damn good, baby.”

You elbow him in the ribs. Hard. Hard enough that he lets out a low oomph, and both Tess and Tommy’s heads snap in your direction. You stare back at them, feigning innocence, whiskey buzzing in the back of your skull. “What?”

A few more games of cards, and Tess literally falls out of her chair, laughing the whole way down. Joel declares the night officially over, and Tommy gets Tess to her feet, half-carries her towards the door. “You need help?” Joel asks, and Tommy shakes his head.

“Nah, we’ll be fine. You two have a good night. Thanks for dinner, Liv.”

“You’re welcome, Tommy.”

The door closes behind them, and Joel lingers, locking the door, closing the curtains, clearing off the table. Meanwhile, you head for the bed, fumbling with the buttons on your shirt — Joel’s shirt, always Joel’s shirt — before giving up and falling forward onto the mattress, reaching for Joel’s pillow, bunching it beneath your head.

The bed creaks a moment later, Joel’s weight settling over you, hands planted either side of you, mouth at the back of your neck. “You’re wearing far too many clothes, missy.”

“You should fix that,” you slur at him, turning your face enough to see the shadow of him above you. You wiggle your hips, lifting your ass until it presses against his crotch, and Joel hisses. “You got promises to make good on, Joel Miller.”

“I do,” he replies, letting out a low hum as he drags his hand down your spine. “Don’t I?”

He shuffles back, and the loss makes you whine, but he slides your needs apart a moment later, grips your hips and lifts until your ass is in the air, face still pressed into the pillow. Joel doesn’t waste any time, fingers curling in the waist of your leggings and pulling them down, taking your underwear with them. You barely have a chance to breathe, his mouth covering you a moment later, tongue darting between your folds. “Fucking christ, Joel.”

He hums again, the noise vibrating through you, one hand coming down on your cheek in a quick spank a second later. You can feel yourself flooding his tongue, already wet from his teasing at the table. Reaching one hand back, you card your fingers through his hair, keeping him against you, angling your hips back to push yourself further into his face.

“Pretty girl,” he rasps, dragging the flat of his tongue up and down, back up and back down again. The rhythm makes your muscles tighten, the promise of an orgasm prickling at your senses. “Always taste so good.” He gives you another quick spank, the motion making your flesh tingle. “Always feel so good.”

“Joel.”

“Don’t worry, baby,” he grumbles, diving back in for a moment before pulling back once more. “I’m gonna fuck you so good, just like I promised.”

You moan into the pillow, whining again when he pulls back, your hand falling out of his hair, flopping sideways onto the bed. You curl your fingers in the bedsheets instead, gasping loudly when he presses two wet fingers into you, right to the knuckle in one fell swoop. His thumb reaches up, pushes lightly between your cheeks, and you let out a choked noise you didn’t know you were capable of.

“That feel good?” he asks, and you nod, your face still pressed to his pillow. “You want more, baby?”

You nod again, furiously.

“Want you inside me,” you murmur, your eyes rolling back in your skull as his thumb presses harder. “Fuck, Joel, please.”

There’s the shuffling of fabric, the clink of his belt buckle, the front of his thighs pressed to the backs of yours. You turn your head slightly, just enough to see him, the hem of his t-shirt tucked between his teeth, his cock in his hand. The sight alone makes you clench around his fingers, biting your lip as he pulls them out. They dig into the meat of your ass a moment later, spreading you open just a touch more. His thumb stays where it is, and you watch, stomach coiled in anticipation as he leans forward just slightly, drops his jaw until the t-shirt falls from his mouth, and spits.

It lands right where his thumb is, slides down over where you’re already drenched, and he flexes his hips forward. You try to bury your moan in his pillow, but Joel reaches down with his other hand, fists your hair in his hand, tugs a little.

“I wanna hear you, baby.”

“The neighbours—”

“I don’t give a fuck, Liv. Let me hear you.”

A choked moan falls out as he slams all the way forward, burying himself to the hilt, his thumb pressing down at the same time. You keep your face to the side, keep your eyes trained on his. He lets go of your hair just to take hold of your hip, pulling back just to slam forward again, the feeling and movement making your thighs shake.

“Joel, fuck—”

“That’s right,” he grits, and his pace only gets faster, the apartment filling with the sound of skin on skin. It drives you wild. “That’s fuckin’ right. Say it again.”

He spanks you again, just that much harder, and you cum.

It hits you like a freight train, your back arching fiercely as you lose it, eyes screwed shut, thighs shuddering against Joel’s. Faintly, you hear him groan, barely aware of the next spank he gives. You’re half-sure you’ll have a handprint on your ass come morning, but you don’t fucking care. His name spills from your lips, somewhere between a moan and a gasp, and your stomach flutters as he fists his hand in the back of your shirt and drags you up.

You can’t catch your breath, your chest heaving as he takes your chin in his hand, one arm banded around your middle as he keeps slamming into you, dropping his fingers between your legs. You don’t know where one orgasm finishes and the second begins, but he covers your mouth with his, drinks your noises down like they’re whiskey instead of moans.

“That’s my girl,” he whispers against your lips, his hips stuttering against your ass. “Love you so goddamned much.”

You flail a hand back, diving your fingers into his hair, tugging until his head moves back slightly, so you can look him in the eyes. “Then cum,” you murmur, leaning forward enough to bite at his bottom lip. “Cum for me.”

He does, his entire body shuddering with it, his grip on you like an iron vice. The warmth is delicious, spreading through your lower half like the whiskey had, only the feeling of Joel is that much more addictive, always leaving you wanting more. You both collapse forward a second later, a tangle of limbs and lips, never far from reach.

+

Joel wakes with a jolt. The nightmares have been less and less common, since he got to Boston, since he started sleeping in the same bed as you again, but they still show their faces every once in a while. Usually the drinking keeps them at bay, but tonight they’re intent to haunt him.

You’re not where you should be, tucked against his chest, and for a moment, panic seizes his heart, makes his hands go cold.

“Liv?”

You’re perched on the edge of the bed, knees drawn up to your chest, staring out the window. His mostly unbuttoned shirt is falling off your shoulders, and when he calls your name, you glance at him quickly before your gaze moves back out the window. Joel doesn’t miss the shine in your eyes, and sits up slow, reaches for you, rubbing one hand up your back.

“You all right?”

“I’m happy,” you reply, head tilting back on your shoulders, face illuminated by the moonlight. “I am unreasonably happy, Joel. I’ve done so much terrible shit, and yet here I am, stupidly, unreasonably, unfathomably happy.”

He reaches up, pinches your cheek lightly, catches the tear in the corner of your eye. “Then why you cryin’, baby?”

“Cuz I know there’s a chance that I could wake up tomorrow, and it could all be gone.” Your voice cracks, and Joel sits up further, slides down the bed until he’s pressed against your side. “That you could be gone.”

“Never,” he tells you, and opens his arms to you, sighing when you fall into them, presses his mouth to the crown of your head. “I’m not goin’ anywhere, baby. I’m right here, you hear me? I’m right here.”

PREV | NEXT

[sant-riley]

[Black Out Days]

A mission goes wrong

Pairing: Ghost x OFC!reader (Teddy)

A/N: requested by a LOVELY anon turned friend, they really got me with this suggestion and now it's here lmfao. I hope this is okay! Kinda left my comfort zone to write this one :) comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

Word count: 2.5k

TW/CW: Age gaps, Bodily harm, blood mentions, mission going wrong, angst, angst with happy ending, Ghost being conflicted and kinda an ass? (as always lmk if I miss anything!)

--

It was just a simple mission, it was just a fucking reconnaissance mission. Now she can feel her heart start to slow, her ears ringing as she weakly whimpers in pain. Her hands shakily brushing her side, fingers coming back saturated in her blood. 

Not good. Very much not good.

~

Teddy doesn't care for recons, having to sit in one place for hours on end never bid her well. She much rather be following her partners around in on the field, not high up in the middle of bum fuck nowhere with a m40 that she's not even confident she can use correctly.

 That's what Soap had been helping her in the shooting range, long range weaponry. Her mind was running, trying desperately to find something to grasp onto, anything to make the time go by faster. She has half a mind to start messing with the comms but thought better of it. She wonders what Price and Gaz are up to back at base, what dinner will be, if they'll even be home by tonight at that.

Ghost was stationed on the other side of the compound where the target was, Soap closer to the grounds than either of them. Looking down the scope, she sees Soap and his body outline, his tactical gear making him even look bulkier than normal. Shouts ensue and he's suddenly moving, running to take cover and shit he's opening fire. 

She quickly readjusts and starts to pick off any enemy she can see, sweat on her brow as she pants from the adrenaline. Bodies after bodies fall but there's still just so fucking many. She knows there's no way in hell that the three of them can possibly thin the crowd out, not when separated, not with no backup.

"Soap, How copy?" Ghost gruffly speaks into the comms, faint gunshots can be heard through his mic.

"The bloody fucking bastards spotted me! Fucking bullshit!" More Gaelic cursing as Soap moves from cover to cover, moving backwards.

Ghost curses under his breath, starting to make his way down, running towards where Johnny is to help return fire lest the scot gets overwhelmed.

"Teddy, how copy? Need you to cover us." 

 Ghost watches an armed guard run up on him, the man getting way too close for comfort. He unsheathes and flicks one of his knives out of his thigh holsters, ready to throw with full force into the bastards neck. Right when the man drops down like all gravity escaped him, a good portion of his head is laying down on the pavement. Ghost feels the blood spray but doesn't pay any mind to it.

"Already doing it L.T." She breathes, quickly moving her focus back to Soap's location after making sure Ghost was okay to proceed moving.

"Atta girl." 

She pretends the heat rushing to her face isn't due to the pet name, just her nerves. Teddy watches as the two men convene and breathes out a sigh of relief. Momentarily distracted, fumbling to reload, she doesn't hear the footsteps come up behind her. A Rookie mistake that she will indefinitely beat herself up over if she somehow survives this.

It doesn't take long for a gunshot to ring out, and she lets out a blood curdling scream. White blinds her as she squeezes her eyes tight, her body curling in on itself, trying in vain to stop the pain.

For the amount of pain she's in, she's fortunate that whoever just shot her into her side, figures that's enough and rushes down towards the compound, leaving her to bleed out. Damn, not even worth the second bullet to finish her off? Kinda funny if she says so herself. The stinging is getting worse and she feels fluid rush from her body. Okay, maybe not funny.

She forces her arms to move herself, forcing her body to flip over onto her back. With more strength than she ever thought needed to just use her fucking hand, clicking the comm to life.

"Gh..ghost-" a groan cuts her off, her body trembling as she starts to feel woozy.

"Teddy, how copy?" Ghost mutters, his nerves are shot, he hears the scream. Not alot of things can unsettle him anymore, not after what he's seen and done but her scream gets to him more than he'll ever admit.

Soap curses and whirls around, looking at the Lieutenant with a shout. His accent getting thicker and thicker.

"Oh fuck, we gotta move, now L.T."

Soap juts his chin towards your location, his breathing getting heavy. He's trying to meet Ghost's eyes.

Ghost refuses to meet them, he has to be the calm one here, no matter what his body may be telling him otherwise.

"Teddy! How copy?" The sweat coming down his face is disgusting, he can feel his heartbeat out of his damn chest.

"'m losin' alot of blood si, I don't-" She's crying, hearing the sniffling.

"I'm scared." That's what springs Ghost and Soap to start gunning it. Not even looking behind them to see if they're being followed.

Ghost shot off like a bat out of hell.

Teddy hears him curse louder than she ever has, hearing him start to pant. He must be running towards her.

"Soap, follow and cover!" It must be bad if he's not even attempting to use military talk.

"Aye." Soap quickly responds, following Ghost from a short distance. His hands tightening harshly, knuckles turning pale as he pushes himself to keep up.

A few moments passed as she tried to get the lump from her throat to go away. She's barely conscious now, her eyes keep fluttering.

"Si, Johnny, I don't think I'm gonna make it." She whimpers. It pushes Ghost to run faster, faster than he's ever run in his entire life.

"Shut the fuck up with talking like that, I'm coming." Ghost snarls, zeroing in on the area she was meant to be safe at. God fucking damnit. A fucking reconnaissance mission.

"Don't worry Lass, good ol' Johnny and Ghost are coming to save ya." Soap added, trying his best to get the mood even a fraction bit lighter, He feels his legs start to burn and ache.

Soap only gets a faint chuckle back, followed by a pain filled groan.

"Ghost, I need to tell you something." She stares up at the treeline, watching the leaves move about in the wind. There were alot of things she could tell him, how much she loves spending time with him, watching movies, teaching him about internet culture, how much she appreciated him going out his way to look out for her, to taking her in, for trusting her, for, dare she say it, loving her. She told herself it wasn't romantic at first, but it was impossible to not fall for him once he let her in. It wasn't her fault, it was as natural as breathing for her to fall in love with Simon.

Though that's too many words for too little time. So she'll have to settle for something shorter. She prays to a God she isn't quite sure she believes in that Ghost doesn't meet her one day and beat her ass for what she's about to pull.

 She had no clue if he shared her romantic feelings, she figured it didn't matter now. One hand are on side, weakly trying to put pressure and the other holding onto her necklace, running her fingers on the charm that lays there.

"Don't. Don't you fucking dare."

"I lo…" Before she can finish her sentence, she sees black, hearing thundering footsteps approach her and a shout of her real name. Funny, no one ever called her that anymore.

~

  Everyone is in a scramble when she's brought in, curled up in Ghost's arms while Soap shoves through the doors to call for medics.

The extraction came quickly after Ghost bundled her into his arms, Soap calling Price and telling him off the situation. They have never heard Price bark out orders as harshly and as fast as he did, no doubt he's the reason 141's base is a mess.

Gaz is there, yelling and shouting her name as he watches from the sidelines, asking what the the fuck happened as he frantically looks back and forth to Ghost and Soap, to Teddy who lays limply in the specters arms.

 Price is there ordering the medics to hurry the hell up, his body high strung while his eyes zoned in on Teddy, he feels bile rise in his throat. 

"Son, what the fuck happened to 'er?!"

Medics come running, arms reaching to grab Teddy and place her on a stretcher. Ghost tightens his grip for a second, looking down at how pale she's become, and hands her over, a tremble in his hands. Her blood soaks his gear, his hoodie, down to his undershirt. It makes his skin crawl as he stands there, watching her get farther and farther away from him.

He can see Soap, Price and Gaz try and get his attention but can't move, can't utter a damn word while he watches.

He stands there for God knows how long, staring down the hallway.

~

First thing she hears is beeping, every second. It's fucking annoying and she turns to roll over and turn it off until her skin pulls and she legs out a "fuck!".

She peels up each one of her eyes, squinting against the harsh lights of the room. Stark white, the nasty smell of disinfectant. Ah, so she's alive. She groans as the pain finally seeps in. The heart beat monitor beeping more as she awakes, her anxiety mounting.

There's a rush of a pair of heavy footsteps that rush towards her cot, the curtain being swung back to see Ghost, who funnily enough is pale enough to be his namesake. She tries to formulate a sentence but all she can do it let out a pathetic noise from her mouth. She wants to hug him, so bad, she just wants to feel safe again but she can't move from this fucking bed. Her legs won't cooperate with her heart that screams to get closer.

He reaches her cot in seconds, putting his hands on the side of the bed, gripping the rail with enough force to snap it if he pushed any further.

"God fucking damnit runt." He breathes out, his eyes scanning her flushed face. His thumb caresses the bandage that lays there on her cheek. 

She can't help but lean into it, basking in the contact.

She shoots him a weak smile, eyes tearing up as she sees him again, not through a lens, he's here and he's warm. She's okay, they saved her.

Ghost sucks in a ragged breath before his eyes steel and he looks down at her. He suddenly looks all too big, too intimidating.

"You have alot of fucking nerve in that head of yours, to say what you did."

The fucking audacity she has, to confess her love to a old man while she's fucking dying on the cold ground. Not a message to her family, not a message of her fighting, nothing. Just a love confession for a man who doesn't deserve it

She tries to play dumb, looking confused trying desperately not to burst into tears. The repercussions of her actions hitting her like a fucking truck all over again.

"I'm not sure what-"

"Don't play fucking dumb with me. You know damn well what you said. Say it again." Another growl, he's looking at her like he wants to shake her.

"Ghost I don't think-" She's pleading.

"Damnit Teddy! Fucking say it!"

She feels herself snap, the overload of emotions that she's felt since she joined the task force coming out.

"What do you want me to say? That I love you? Because I fucking do, I've loved you ever since I met you! Is that what you wanna hear? The Rookie has a crush on her superior? The secrets out, I know you don't see me that way, you don't have to tell me!" She feels her cheek dampen as she starts to breath heavily, her emotions overwhelming her. Ghost says nothing, his eyes widened beneath the balaclava. If she was in a clearer state of mind, she's notice he didn't have the black smudge around his eyes, or that the bags under his eyes were darker. May have noticed his red they were too.

"I didn't mean to fall in love with you! I didn't!" She hiccups, voice straining as she shoves her hands up to her face, trying to muffled herself.

She knows she should shut up already, but almost nearly dying, she can't bring herself to care all too much.

"I love you, I love you so much it hurts, you see me as some stupid little kid and it fucking hurts.

All her life, she was just a kid to people, it didn't matter what she did, how she acted, how she dressed, no one treated her as an adult. No one ever took her feelings seriously, always being told that it was just a phase. No one ever cared how she felt til she came here. Until she met the team. For the first time she felt like she mattered. And here she was ruining it.

Her hands are gently pried from her face, skeleton gloves in her eyesight as her body trembles.

"You're just confused kid, relax." A slip of his tongue, he immediately knows he's fucked up with the petname. He didn't mean to say that, he truly didn't but he was so taken aback at her confession. He wasn't thinking. 

He could feel her stare on him til she started chuckling to herself, her body getting rigid, yanking her hands away and shoving him away with what little strength she has.

"See! You think I'm a kid! Fine, you know what? Send me out already, get it over with. Discharge me-"

Her voice is rising in volume, the heart beat monitor going haywire. She's surprised there's not a nurse here yet.

"Can you shut that mouth of yours for one damn second so I can speak?" He shouts, he regrets yelling but she's spiraling and he needs to put a stop to it now.

Your mouth snaps closed, staring with glassy eyes up at him.

"I have never, never cared for someone as much as I care for you."  He wets his lips with the tip of his tongue, his two hands on her shoulders as he tries to collect his thoughts. It feels like his head is fucking ringing, information overload.

He knows he should say the word love back, she deserves to know but truth be told he's fearful. If he says that one word, it all becomes too real, she becomes truly someone that he loves and cherishes and that is fucking horrifying.

He moves his hands down, gently until he reaches her hands, where he intertwines them. She stares at where they meet, her body involuntary trembling.

She's so fucking small and fragile, young and pretty, God. He knows he shouldn't, he needs to be Ghost and put his foot down but he can't. Simon is creeping in and taking control. He wants to be selfish for the first time in God knows how long.

Ghost pulls up his mask, just above his lips while she shudders at seeing the stubble and faint scars that run across his skin. Her pupils were blown out and wide, her breath catching in her throat.

Gently pulling her forward to kiss her forehead, his lips are rough and chapped. She feels a joke creep in her mind but decides against it.

He rests his forehead on hers, using one hand to tangle itself in her hair as he looks into her eyes.

"You're mine, got that? I'm yours, so stop that shit, you're not going anywhere, ever."

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[baroquebucky]

reach

soulmate au where when you touch your soulmate you see glimpses of your future with them; the winter soldier touches you and realizes there’s so much more out there

series masterlist // previous // next

part two

word count: 3.3k (worth it me thinks)

masterlist

a/n: hi bffs !! here is part two to touch !! i hope u guys enjoy !! might make a part 3 if you guys want ?!? let me know what u guys think !!

You stared at the clunky metal cuffs on your hands, silent as the four of you were squished together along with two agents. Tears staining your cheeks, you had stopped crying as soon as the agents had cuffed you, turning on a steely exterior.

“i knew him” Steve spoke, you were all silent as he stared at the floor, “he looked right at me like he didn’t even know me” his voice distant.

“that was over 70 years ago how is that possible?” Sam spoke, looking at you and then at Steve.

“Zola, Buckys whole unit was captured in 43” Steve explained, his gaze hardening, “Zola experimented on him, whatever he did helped Bucky survive the fall” his voice softening.

“they must have found him and-” Steve’s voice was tender as he trailed off.

“none of that’s your fault steve” Natasha groaned, bleeding through the bandage you had put on her.

You looked over at her and frowned, “we need to get a doctor in here, she’s lost a lot of blood if we don’t put pressure on that wound” you turned, looking at one of guards next to you.

You flinched as they turned on the taser, scooting back closer to steve. Your eyes widened as they knocked out the other agent, taking off their helmet only to reveal Maria Hill. You smiled softly.

“that thing was squeezing my brain- who’s this guy?” She spoke, staring at sam.

After breaking out of the cuffs and escaping the truck the five of you headed to some secret base, you were quiet as they chatted among each other, thoughts of bucky clouding your mind.

“y/n, why- what happened?” Steve spoke gently, falling into step with you.

You looked at him, slowing down a little bit. “It was him steve” you whispered, voice shaking. Steve stopped completely, grabbing your wrist and pulling you away from the group.

“what- i thought- are you sure?” He rushed out, breathless.

“i saw us, together” you managed out, a tears falling from your eyes, “it was our future,” you looked at Steve, wiping your eyes before continuing to walk forward.

“y/n we have to talk about this” Steve rushed next to you and you nodded, he opened his mouth but you stopped him as you approached sam, Maria and natasha.

“not now, please” you pleaded and he nodded, holding your hand and squeezing it softly.

“She’ll want to see him first” Maria spoke, a smirk on her face as you all looked at each other in confusion, following her as she pushed some plastic curtains out of the way.

Your stomach fell and a smile found it’s way onto your face, “son of a bitch” you chuckled.

“about damn time” fury mumbled you couldn’t help but smile.

As they attended natasha the rest of you listened to fury rattle off his list of injuries, explaining why he had to stay hidden and why no one was told of him still being alive. You nodded along in understanding, your eyes trained on the floor before looking at him with a smile.

“does this mean i still have to turn in that report?”

Buckys mind was racing. The smell of freshly baked cookies and visions of you in his head. Even flashes of the blonde who was with you.

He could hear his scream after he fell, he saw flashes of them turning him into who he was now. He memorized your face, the way your hair looked and the smile you had on your face for the few seconds you had together. He focused on the future, the picnics and the singing.

Bucky mourned for himself, for who he was and who he wish he could become.

The sound of an argument and multiple footsteps brought him to reality, his eyes still red and nose pink from crying when he saw you. Alexander Pierce walked in and bucky felt sick to his stomach, watching as the agents lowered their weapons on his command.

“Mission report” he spoke coldly, angry when he had to repeat himself once more. Pierce crinkled his nose, hitting bucky in frustration.

Bucky hesitated, he shouldn’t tell them about you, he couldn’t. He needed you safe, he didn’t want you hurt.

“the man on the bridge, who was he” he mumbled, voice fragile as he spoke. Buckys eyes met Pierces, worry flickering in his eyes before pushing it away.

“i knew him” he mumbled, Pierce sitting in front of him. His words were fuzzy as he thought of you and the blonde man, he wanted you, he was meant to be with you. “but i knew him” bucky mumbled once more when Pierce finished talking, his lips pressing into a smal tight smile for a second.

“prep him” Pierce spoke, bucky wanted to cry, his stomach was in knots as Pierce told them to wipe him. Panic rose in his chest, he couldn’t forget you, he couldn’t lose his only hope in 70 years. He leaned back as they pushed him into his seat, his breathing ragged and heavier. He had to hold onto you, the smell on baking cookies in his mind as he squeezed his eyes shut.

“I never liked him” you spoke, turning to Natasha, “i told you remember! You brushed me off” you huffed, turning your attention to Maria and some suitcase.

Maria explained insights plan, telling the four of you how to stop the carriers. Making sure to emphasize the need to link all three carriers.

“- we can salvage what’s left” Nick spoke, you furrowed your brows and shook your head, anger bubbling in your chest.

“we aren’t salvaging anything!” You spoke angrily, Nick staring at you in shock. Steve nodded his head.

“we’re taking down SHIELD” Steve spoke and Nick tried to defend himself, “SHIELD had nothing to do with this!” The man grumbled.

“You gave me this mission, this is how it ends” Steve spoke firmly, “SHIELDS been compromised you said so yourself, HYDRA grew under your nose and you didn’t even notice” his brows furrowed and eyes cold.

“why do you think we’re meeting in a cave, i noticed” Nick shot back, you shook your head in disbelief.

“how many paid the price before you did?” You quipped, thinking about your soulmate, where was he? what would happen to him?

“I didn’t know about barnes” Nick softened, looking at Steve, the blonde rolled his eyes.

“even if you did would you have told me about it? Or would you compartmentalize that too” he scoffed, you bit your bottom lip in frustration.

“HYDRA, SHIELD, it all goes” you stated firmly, eyes set on fury, he looked around at the others.

“they’re right” Maria sighed.

You stood atop the dam, the sound of the wind rustling the trees calmed you down, you focused on one of the flashes you had seen when you touched bucky.

“You set this all up for little ol’ me?” You teased, bucky rolling his eyes with a smile on his face, taking your hand in his and leading you to the middle of the meadow he had found.

“only the best for my sweets” he replied, shooting a wink at you and you blushed slightly, the cool wind hitting your flushed skin.

“oh wow you even got us a little cake? went all out did you barnes” you teased and he smiled, letting a soft groan out.

“can you please stop laughing at me for five minutes” he pouted, and you smiled at him softly, sitting on the blanket and pulling his down with you, kissing the pout on his lips.

“i love it angel” you mumbled, kissing his lips softly before pulling away and reaching into the basket, pulling out the sandwiches and handing one to bucky along with a drink.

“found it the other day, thought you would like to watch the sunset from here instead of that old park” he spoke, taking a sip from the water bottle you handed him and your heart fluttered in your chest.

“i love you so much James” you mumbled, leaning over and peppering kisses all over his face, a smile on his lips as he soaked in all your loving.

You giggled as he moved over, picking you up with ease and spinning you around. Bucky set you down gently, you rested your head on his shoulder as you marveled at the sun setting, pinks and reds painting the sky, golden rays hitting the two of you.

“you know I’m yours forever, right doll?” Bucky mumbled, his head in your lap as you played with his hair. You smiled sweetly at him, nodding your head.

“and I’m yours forever and more lovebug” you replied.

“He’s gonna be there, you know” Sam spoke, causing you to jump slightly. Steve walked next to him, the two men approaching you.

“I know” you nodded.

“whoever he used to be, the guy he is now, he’s not the kind you save, he’s the kind you stop” Sam spoke, Steve standing next to you as Sam looked at the two of you.

“i don’t know if we can do that” Steve spoke for the two of you, Sam looked at you softly. Your eyes meeting and you gave him a small smile.

“he might not give you a choice” he whispered, you shook your head as he continued, “he doesn’t know you.”

“he has to, he has to remember me, I’m his soulmate” you spoke, eyes welling up with tears once more.

“gear up, it’s time” Steve spoke gently.

Your hands shook softly as you changed, taking in a deep breath as you fell into line with Maria, Sam and Steve, walking towards SHIELD.

“excuse us” you smiled as the man opened the door to the control center, moving out of your way quickly when he saw Maria and Sams guns, “alrighty star spangled man, your time to shine” you smiled, patting him on the back.

Steve began his speech, a proud smile on your face as he spoke, feeling the shift in the air, your heart thumping against your rib cage.

“did you write that down first? Or was it off the top of you head” Sam smiled and you laughed softly.

The sirens blared and you heard the echoes of gunshots, “they’re initiating launch” Maria spoke in your ear, you jogged next to Sam and Steve.

“how do we know the good guys from the bad guys?” Sam questioned.

“if they’re shooting at you they’re bad” you replied, Steve smiling before the two of you hopped down and fought the men on the airstrips.

You were in a whirl of punches and gunshots, throwing your knives and taking down men to help Steve get to the helicarriers.

Steve ran from behind you, the two of you running to put in the cartridge, “alpha lock!” You spoke, you and Steve running to leave the carrier. Sam calling out “bravo lock!” Not long after.

You took down a couple guards, hitching a ride with a pilot and Steve counting on sam to get him to the other helicarrier.

You ran out as soon as you could, blood running cold as you recognized the metal arm grabbing sams wing.

You froze as he tore the wing off, kicking him off the side, eyes wide you ran out, “Sam!” You cried out, panic filling your chest.

“I’m fine, I’m just grounded, I’m sorry guys” he apologized and you let out a sigh of relief.

“I’m still on the helicarrier, i got it” Steve spoke and you felt relief knowing he was safe.

“I’ll come down and help you” you spoke, turning around and coming face to face with three men. You groaned in annoyance as they approached you, moving quickly to take one of their guns, knocking them out with the butt. Using another one as a shield before kicking him off you and into the other man.

“Y/n no! Wait on my signal, he’s here and- we just need to wait for the right moment” Steve spoke, out of breath as he spoke. You hesitated, watching bucky run to beat Steve.

“okay” you spoke softly, doing what you could to make sure it was only steve and bucky in the helicarrier.

It felt like an eternity until Steve finally called for you, breathless. “Y/n get down here!” You ran quickly, maneuvering your way down and seeing the two men fighting.

“take it!” Steve yelled, bucky laying on the floor next to him, you nodded, running up to him as his tossed it to you, catching it before taking off again.

You felt the bullet whirl next to your head, he was shooting at you. Your stomach fell as you realized, running faster. You heard Steve groan, falling next to you.

“Steve!” You cried out, stopping before realizing you had mere seconds left. You saw the blood through his suit, biting your lip before taking off, hurrying to put in the cartridge, rushing to help Steve up.

“Charlie lock!” You cried out, putting his weight on your shoulder, struggling to carry him.

“get out of there!” Maria called, you looked at Steve, his eyes telling you all you needed to know, you nodded softly.

“fire now” Steve spoke, Maria began to argue but you cut her off, “do it!” You commanded, losing your balance as the helicarriers shot at each other.

Bucky’s groan caught your attention, your heart breaking as you saw he was trapped under a piece of metal. Without hesitation you and Steve jumped down, lifting the metal between the two of you.

“it’s gonna be okay” you whispered, moving to reach out only for the helicarrier to decline sharply, causing you to slip away, inches from his hand.

You grasped onto a ledge, steadying yourself and attempting to get back to the two super soldiers, the constant explosions making it difficult.

Bucky punched Steve, fear in his eyes as they spoke, you ran to them, continuously getting knocked over by the crashes.

“I’m not gonna fight you, you’re my friend” you heard Steve say, dropping the shield as bucky tackled him.

“you’re my mission!” Bucky spoke, anger in his eyes.

You leaped, tackling Bucky off of Steve, flashes of your future in both of your eyes.

“y/n!” Steve cried out.

“no wait pull over!” You cried out, eyes focusing on a box you had passed on the highway, bucky furrowed his brows in confusion.

“doll it’s raining it’s just a box” he slowed down, pulling over anyway.

“no there were cats!” you squealed, unlocking your door quickly and running out of the car, the rain immediately drenching you to the bone. Bucky cursed softly as you ran out without your jacket, following you quickly. His eyes landing on the two cats in your arms.

“told you so” you teased, motioning for him to grab the other two from the box. Bucky grabbed them quickly, running to your car and setting them on your lap, wrapping them in your jacket and trying to warm them up.

You arrived at the shelter quickly, heart aching as they took the four kittens from you. The small white one mewling and sinking his claws into your shirt, you smiled softly before taking his claws out of the fabric, handing him to a vet.

“We’ll call you when we’re done with all the tests and diagnostics” the woman smiled kindly and you nodded, bucky slipping his hand into your easily and you leaned into his warmth.

You were cuddled up next to bucky on the couch, head on his chest and watching one of your favorite shows.

“doll?” Bucky called out, moving you gently and you got up from his chest.

“sorry, I’m just worried about the kittens is all” you sighed, chewing on your bottom lip, bucky let out a breath before pulling you into his lap.

“that white one really liked you” he chuckled and you nodded, a smile on your face as you remembered the way he didn’t want to leave you.

“almost as much as you do huh” you teased and bucky laughed, shaking his head at your statement.

“no one can love you as much as i do dollface” he replied, his face serious before breaking into a smile as you rolled your eyes. You moved to get off his lap but he stopped you.

“why don’t we keep him” he smiled, nervous as he proposed the idea to you, “you could use some company when i go away for missions and I’ve always wanted a cat, and plus statistics say people are happier with pets-” bucky rambled.

“yes! oh my god finally! I’m so excited” you cheered, jumping of the couch and hopping around, a smile on your face as you turned to look at bucky.

Bucky smiled as you sat back down, leaning in to kiss him softly, a smile on both of your faces. “Should name him alpine” Bucky suggested a smile on his face as you nodded.

Bucky went overboard on toys and treats, his arms full as he set the bags down, a smile on his face as you finished kitten proofing the apartment.

“James! You didn’t need to get that much” you spoke shocked at the amount of things he got for your new kitten.

“this is our son we are talking about, he deserves the world” bucky scoffed, fixing the bags and putting everything away, the two of you excited to pick up your new child.

The two of you played with alpine for hours when he got home, giggles filling the apartment as you observed his antics. The three of you curled up on the couch, alpine asleep in your lap as bucky had his arm around you, some documentary playing.

“i love our family” you smiled, looking at bucky and kissing his jaw softly. He smiled at you as you pulled away, laying your head on his chest again.

“i love it too sweets” his heart was melting at the sight of you, cozy in his arms with the kitten in your lap.

“I’m yours forever bucky” you whispered, eyes closing as exhausting took over, his heart fluttered.

“I’m yours forever y/n” he replied, a smile on his face as the words left his lips.

Buckys eyes widened as the scenario played out in his eyes, you looked at him, a small smile on your face.

“it’s you” he whispered, a small smile forming on his face.

“it’s me, forever” you mumbled, moving to sit up and hug him.

Before you could, debris broke the glass you were laying on, your reflexes not quick enough to hold onto something, causing you to fall into the water, fear in Buckys eyes.

Both him and Steve dove in after you, bucky reaching you before his friend and pulling you out frantically. Steve helped drag you to shore, shaking you before giving you CPR.

You coughed up water, rolling around before your vision cleared, a smile on your face as you saw Steve, wrapping your arms around him.

“wheres bucky?” You questioned, heart sinking as you searched for the metal armed man.

“i- he was just here” Steve spoke, looking around, panic in his eyes.

Within moments Maria, Natasha and Sam found the two of you, rushing you to a hospital, treating all your wounds and any broken bones. Falling asleep moments after with Sam watching over both you and Steve.

It had been close to a month since SHIELD fell, since you last saw bucky. You woke up to knocking on your door, your eyes bleary as you checked the time, 7:34 am.

You groaned and forced yourself out of bed, “who needs something at 7 am on a Saturday!” You called out, angrily opening the door. Your anger sizzled away within seconds, you eyes meeting the baby blue ones you had only seen for moments at a time.

“Bucky” you whispered, your wind had been knocked out of you as you saw your soulmate on the other side of the door.

“hi doll” he smiled softly, his eyes brighter as he looked at you.

-

tag list !

@felicityofbakerstreet @newyork47 @classygirlything @ebxny27 @hhaydenn @miaangel24 @shawnie--jo @quinnmaddie @mugscraps

[stories-by-rie]

124 Fwd: Re: Re: pls read your mails

Popping out of my temporary grave and dumping a quick thing here in a futile attempt to suppress impending doom. Might not be very coherent. Trigger warning for a bit of violence, mention of knife, blood and gunshot. ~800 words

The door bangs shut behind me and the hero swirls around to face me. In the absence of stars, the neon signs make the mist of fog and fumes shine like a piece of art--a sharp contrast to her silhouette. Perhaps, the city’s noise could be the matching music, but it hardly reaches us on the flat roof of the skyscraper. We’re still too far away from each other for her to recognize me. 

One hand flies to her thigh where she keeps the knives for throwing, another to her ear-piece. There’s a beep in my ear, I push the button.

“Hero to sidekick, please respond. Unknown character at agreed meeting point?”

I push the button again. “Sidekick to hero, the character is known.”

I don’t have to be close enough to see the shock on her face, I can hear it in my ear. Many aborted you’s, even more broken I’s. A change in emotion. 

“Hero demands to know what her sidekick is thinking.” Her voice is quieter, but the consonants sharper enunciated. The t’s and s’s are stabbing. She pulls a knife, but doesn’t hold it at the tip, ready to throw it. Somehow it looks more like moral support. 

I take controlled steps toward her. She doesn’t get more defensive and it makes my blood boil. Not a single thought wasted about the potential threat that I could be. Wholly unaware of the knowledge I hold. It must show on my face because she raises an eyebrow in a way that clearly says what do you think you’re doing.

“You know, I was burning for the cause”, I start and try to at least pretend to be nonchalant about any of this when my whole presence is proof of the contrary. 

“I cannot claim to have noticed”, the hero bites out. 

“Oh, obviously not. For that you would have to notice anything. You would have to notice that the secretary whose offer you took donates money to the supervillain's corporation. I wanted to tell you but you weren’t in the base. So I wrote an email which you clearly haven’t bothered to read. You would have to notice that your other sidekick hasn’t been in the base for a whole week. I let you know after you told me to assign them a new mission, and to that email you also have not replied. And that was just last week.”

The hero laughs near-hysterically, the knife swinging between her fingers at the tip now. 

“So what? You’re rebelling because I don’t check my emails enough? Who do you think you are? The hero of bureaucracy?”

I let a smile slip on my face. 

“I am not rebelling.” I’m finally close enough. “I am avenging the people you failed because of your ignorance.” I aim at her chest. “Ignorance that has already cost lives, all for your own vanity.” I pull the trigger.

The bullet hits her right in the chest. Her armour can’t hold it because I rigged it. It’s not that she would ever check her gear herself, she simply expects me to do it. I can hear her surprised gasp as her fingers come away bloody red. She sinks down on her knees, right as I arrive next to her, my lips close enough to her ear that 

“If the superhero offered you more fame and glory, you would not even hesitate to accept.” I dip a finger into her wound, make her wince. “Just so you know, the others aren’t in on this. I left the others in the dark about our get-together tonight. So if they’re not responding to your calls, you’ll know that I didn’t even have to convince them.”

Her breath comes out stuttered in pain, but her eyes are burning with fury. It unfurls  something in me. Some ugly scraps are peeled off by my courage. The thing at its core is still hungry for more. 

I clasp my hand around her face, force her to look at me. “Go on. Try it.”

She doesn’t move, but I will not be satisfied with her defiance. I press harder into her skin. “I said. Try it.”

She presses the button and calls for the others, one after the other. There are a few replies that let her know that it is my shift today, most of them say that they cannot aid in order to keep their identities safe. Most don’t even pick up. 

I let go of her face, my fingers leaving faint red impressions on her skin, a bloody tear beneath her eye. 

The neon lights of the surrounding buildings mirror in the blood that starts to pool around her. I find that it is not worthy to be called pretty. 

[theonewiththefanfics]

Shield (one-shot)

Synopsis: To the new Captain America she might just be a human shield. But Bucky can see there’s more to it. What he can’t understand is why she stays.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Genre: angst, lil bit of fluff

Warnings: mentions of blood and guns, swearing, torture, low mental state etc.

Word count: 3591

I am going absolutely feral about the fact that a portion of the series takes place in Latvia as I am Latvian :D Just seeing the signs and streets (which are not really ours cause they filmed in Prague, but are similar enough I can envision it), especially because we’re such a small country is amazeballs, so to be in such a huge show with my MCU faves is insane. Had the same kind of reaction to Brooklyn Nine-Nine with Nikolaj and the Captain Latvia episode. Riga hammer for the win :D 

P.S. John Walker is not Captain America cause he does not posses America’s ass. Also Zemo is one hundred percent Bucky’s and Sam’s sugar daddy. I won’t accept any dispute over this.

P.S.S. please also remember - John Walker is a character not a real person. John Walker is played by an actor who is doing his job the same way the actor who played Joffrey did. Do not harass him etc. but rather appreciate the insane talent he has. This place is a Wyatt Russell stan place.

P.S.S.S. Kinda spoilers for the show so if you haven’t seen it, don’t read this.

He hated him. Bucky genuinely hates him. He never thought he had despised something or someone so much, not even HYDRA, as much as he hated John Walker – the new Captain America. He wanted to scream at that, at the fact that this arrogant asshole was carrying Steve’s shield, the symbol of freedom and everything good, while in reality, he embodied none of what it stood for.

           Walker and what he’d learned his sidekick was Battlestar, had swooped in from a helicopter while Sam and he had been following the Flag-Smasher vehicles, and, well, they hadn’t been a lot of help, which he shouldn’t be too surprised about. But what he had been surprised about was when they’d all been thrown off of the semi-trucks and scattered all around a field, someone else had been in the mix as well. 

A young woman with Y/H/C hair and determined Y/E/C eyes was rushing towards them, screaming for them to stay on the ground. When Bucky looked behind, he could see why given how one of the radicalised people had jumped from the trucks and was barreling at them with an automatic cocked at them

           But it wasn’t Walker who jumped up running past her, shield at the ready to take on the fire. No. He just remained sitting as the stranger kept her pace. She leapt at the two with a grace of a cat, pushing him and Sam back to the ground and immediately got blown back by the received ammunition, gasps leaving her mouth as the bullets entered her body.

           Sam’s wings extended and created a body length shield as Bucky snatched one of the knives strapped to the man’s side and flung it with deadly accuracy into the Flag-Smasher’s neck, dropping him to the ground. 

           There was blood when he looked back. There was so much blood, and once again it was all over Bucky’s hands, and he couldn’t breathe properly, pressing down on her abdomen and shoulder and side, and. oh god, there were too many bullet wounds...

           Two wide Y/E/C eyes stared back up at him, mouth gasping down shallow breaths as he held down on her wounds trying to stop the blood from pouring out. God, there was so much of it.

           “Don’t close your eyes,” he gritted, his body trembling. “Well get you help. You’ll be alright.”

           But then Walker spoke up, and Bucky saw read because of a different reason. “She’s fine, just leave it.”

           His head snapped to see that arrogant bastard cross his arms as he hissed. “Leave it? She’s fucking bleeding out! She took those bullets for you, and you just want to leave it?!”

           Walker just smirked, nudging his chin towards her body. “You’ll see.”

           “You let her use herself as a shield while you did nothing!”

           “Yeah,” he scoffed. “Because that’s her whole point.”

           And that’s when Bucky felt her skin shift underneath his hands. Slowly the blood stopped pouring out, Y/N’s breathing evened, and her eyes closed not because death was calling, but because of relief as the regenerative cells kicked into high gear.

           Bucky gazed in wonder as the wounds closed up, and when only scar tissue remained he snapped his blue eyes to her, Y/E/C ones already staring back at him.

           “Who are you?” he whispered

           “A human shield that’s what,” Walker answered in her stead, but Bucky just sneered.

           “I asked who, not a what. She’s a fucking person.”

           Once more he looked back down and saw a strange look in her eyes. It was as if she was trying to decipher what those words meant, but once the shock from such a huge assault had ended, she gulped down a breath and gave him a crooked smile. “I’m Y/N Y/L/N.”

           A lopsided one came to grace his own face. “I’m James Buchanan Barnes, but you can call me Bucky.”

           “Bucky.” Her eyebrow rose. “Well, it’s very nice to finally meet you.”

           He smiled at her, and not the painful smile he’d given the senator before her arrest, but a real genuine smile, one that made the skin around his eyes crinkle. 

           “And it’s very nice you didn’t decide to die on us.”

           “Yeah, yeah, can we cut this meet and greet shorter?” Walker interrupted them, and if Bucky hadn’t been holding onto Y/N’s shoulder as she tried to rise from the ground, he would’ve punched the guy. 

           “I told you she was going to be fine.”

           Bucky threw him his best murder glare but stopped when he felt Y/N squeeze his hand as if saying ‘don’t bother.' His brows furrowed in confusion. She just shook her head.

           “We should still find you a hospital.” He talked to Y/N directly, ignoring what the new Captain was saying. “It doesn’t matter that you can survive something like that, I’d rather make sure you’re checked out by professionals.

           “It won’t be necessary.” Walker slipped the shield on his arm and nudged his partner to start walking with him, pretty much expecting the rest to follow. “It was her choice anyway to take the hits.”

           “It doesn’t mean she should!” Bucky pretty much hollered, startling even Sam.

           At that, he saw Y/N’s eyes widen and her head snap up to look at him. All the breath got knocked out from Bucky at the emotion in her face. It was like she didn’t believe what he was saying like she didn’t know it was a possibility to not put her own life before someone else’s, that maybe someone is supposed to do it for her, someone could protect her.

           “She absorbs fucking bullets and infuses them in her body.” John mocked. “I’d say it’s a win-win on both sides. Everyone else stays safe, and she gets stronger, right? The whole bleeding thing is a hitch in the system, but our guys say with enough scuffles that should stop as well.”

Walker looked at her. Y/N just gulped, staring back down at the ground between her knees. 

           When he looked back at everything the moment he’d seen Zemo in the cell and the asshole had said something still remained in him from the Winter Soldier, came back to connect with the scene. He’d hated that sentence because Bucky knew it was true. The Soldier would always be a part of him, but that was what therapy was for – to accept it and let go. But in that minute, he wouldn’t have cared one bit if the ruthless assassin came to the surface if it meant snapping Walker’s neck like a stick. 

           He treated the woman as if she was below him, as if Steve’s shield somehow made him better than her, better than anyone, and yet, even when he’d been given the privilege to carry it, he’d rather use a human person, no matter if they had powers, as a shield.

           A soft hand touched his side, and Bucky looked at Y/N, his breathing heavy at Walker’s words. 

           “I’m alright.” Her voice was softer than he thought it would be. Maybe it was because she was trying to stay out of John’s earshot, but even the gentle whisper made something in Bucky’s chest stir. “Thank you,” she said. “For checking up on me.”

           Bucky stiffly nodded, standing up and offering both his hands for her to take, but even with that, it took Sam holding her by the waist to be able to stand. The Falcon had to catch her, in fact, when she took her first steps, an awkward chuckle escaping her mouth. 

           “It’s been a while since a hit like this.”

           Sam quirked a brow and smirked. “You always have a tendency to do stupid shit like that?”

           Y/N’s whole body relaxed as he said so, and a sting went through Bucky’s own. How bad were they treating her if basic kindness and a little bit of joking made her feel so safe?

           Just as he was about to ask her more, to offer to take her with them, Walker spoke up again. That conversation was an absolute disaster, and the fact that Walker thought Sam and him would actually ever consider working with him on this mission was idiotic. 

           It ended with the two Avengers watching how Walker threw an arm around Y/N’s shoulders, making her knees buckle with the weight, her from still regaining strength, but he didn’t care, just dragged her along with him and Battlestar.

           “Are we just gonna let ‘em do that to her?” Bucky sneered, arms crossed watching their retreating forms over the field.

           He felt Sam glower next to him. “There’s not much we can do.”

           He hated that he was right.

           Bucky couldn’t stop thinking about Y/N. One meeting had left him shaken to the core not just about her, but about how there was something deeply off with the new Captain America, that if they didn’t take action something horrible would happen, not just because of his arrogance, but because of some seed he could feel had rooted itself in the other man’s heart.

           But by that point they’d been in Madripoor, had met Sharon who’d been on the run from the US government ever since the dismantlement of the Avengers, and had now followed a lead to where the Flag-Smashers had settled in Latvia.

           Zemo seemed to not only have a billion cars, but a billion apartments scattered around the world, this one being in the heart of the Old Town. 

           Bucky was on the roof looking over the twinkling lights of the city. His bed had been too soft as it always was, and even the floor wasn’t it for him, not a wink of sleep coming his way as his thoughts were flooded by Y/N.

           Well, the sleep part wasn’t true. He had been able to drift off, only to dream of how the woman didn’t get better, didn’t absorb those bullets and had died right in his arms. That’s when he decided he needed a breath of fresh air.

           The sound of shuffling feet made him whip around from the scenic view only to be greeted by a form he’d now recognise in a full-on ski-suit in pitch-black darkness.

           “What are you doing here?” Bucky stood up wanting to stride over and check her for any wounds she might’ve gotten while around Walker. Any new scar on her body would mean the same number of teeth he’d knock from that Walmart-version-Captain-America’s mouth.

           “Came to warn you.” She shrugged, soft winds making her coat flutter. “John and Lemar are resting, but come morning they’ll be on your ass, so you might wanna make a move now.”

           Bucky shook his head. “I don’t get you. You’re nothing like them, I can see that you know how wrong it is, for him to be carrying that shield, that he’s making a mockery out of the name and legacy Steve built, and yet…”

           Y/N hung her head lifting her shoulders, hands in her pockets. “I gotta do what I gotta do.”

           “He’s an asshole,” Bucky hissed. 

           Y/N gave him a painful look. “I know. But I don’t have anywhere to go. Besides… you have your own way of making amends. Well, this is mine.”

           Dark brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

           She let out a painful chuckle, not because of the memories now plaguing her waking thoughts, but because her wounds were still healing, and instantly Bucky came closer and took her hand, running a soothing thumb over her palm. Wounds he was sure were new.

           Y/N froze at his touch, and Bucky was about to pull away when she put her own thumb over his. He had to bite back tears at how tenderly she was looking down at his palm. Like no one had ever comforted her when it hurt. 

           “When the Blip happened,” she started, voice low and quiet. “I watched how my sister and mom disappeared right in front of my eyes. We were driving over the Golden Gate Bridge, and there was a truck before us. It was carrying loads of metal scraps. The driver of the truck got blipped as well.” She swallowed harshly. “I can still feel how the beam went through my shoulder, how it broke the bone and skin, and how I just wanted to disappear like they had just to make the pain stop. But I didn’t. It hurt so bad.” Y/N looked at Bucky, tears running down her face. “It was burning and tearing, and so much pain… and all I could do was scream, but no one heard me because everyone else was screaming, and I was just one of the thousands doing it.”

           Y/N shook her head, and when Bucky leaned closer to wipe away the tears, she sighed at the feeling. “I passed out sometime later. From the pain the… well, everything. And when I woke up, I heard people outside the door, trying to rip it open, I could see red lights flashing, but where I expected that beam to be was nothing. When I looked down at myself there was a hole in my shirt, but instead of a hole in my shoulder, a round scar was the only thing left from that moment.”

           “They took me to the hospital, and when they tried to put an IV in, my body just swallowed up the needle.” She took a shaky breath, and Bucky squeezed her side. ‘Go on’ he tried to convey with the touch. ‘I’m here.’

           “That’s when the tests started. They were fine at first. Blood samples when they managed to get any, saliva and all that good jazz… but then they started poking. And poking turned into slicing which turned into stabbing until I was their personal pincushion, as they tried to see what my body would and wouldn’t take.”

           Y/N was shaking by that point, but not because of the wind that had picked up, but because of anger, of the horror, she’d had to go through. It took everything in Bucky to remain calm and let her continue.

           “Two years they did that. And then one time they went a bit too far. Someone had stolen a vibranium spear from the Dora Milaje.”

           Bucky’s breath got caught in his throat. He wasn’t moving a muscle.

           “They wanted to know if I could absorb the strongest metal on Earth, so slowly…” Her hands went to her front, to the white blouse she was wearing and started popping open the buttons. Bucky was just about to protest when he understood.

           “They pushed the spear too far.” Her finger ran over a rhomb shaped scar right in the centre of her chest. Right over her heart. “Pushed it right through.”

           “How did you survive?” Bucky was appalled, but in awe at the same time. 

            Y/N shook her head. “I didn’t. I died then and there on the table. They took my body and dumped it in some ditch. From my own calculations, it took me about a day to heal. They’d sown in a scalpel in my stomach a few hours before, so I’m assuming it used that as the binding material for the cells.”

“I was so angry.” She looked at him. “At everyone, at myself, that I couldn’t help my family, that I allowed them to just use me like that, I just went off the deep end. I did so many bad things…” A tear slipped down her cheek. “I read about the Winter Soldier, y’know. His whole thing was efficiency, quickness. I – “ She choked on her words. “I wasn’t. I wanted to drag it out. Wanted to find each and every one of the bastards who laid their hands on me and make them suffer as I did.”

           Bucky’s hand settled on her waist as he pulled her closer, feeling her body keen at the motion as she looked for reassurance. “I’m not a good person, Bucky. This.” She motioned with her head to her body. “This is my repentance for what I did.”

           “What he’s doing is not right. What they’re making you do is not right.” Bucky shook his head. “Just because it might not kill you, doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. No one had any right to touch you.”

           “It’s the price I pay for what I did.”

           “Pain?”

           Y/N nodded. “Eye for an eye. Pain for the pain I caused.”

           Bucky shook his head. “That’s not right.”

           “How else am I supposed to do this?”

           “By getting help yourself first.”

           Y/N’s eyes widened, and Bucky sighed. He understood how impossible that thought seemed, that someone who’s done so much bad could deserve help from others, but he understood her situation better than anyone. “Being here,” he said, “being able to say these things… I can only do that because I got help. It was mandated by the state, but nevertheless…” Both chuckled at that, and Bucky’s heart lightened at the sound, at the genuine sound of joy from her. “But the therapy… I hate to say this, but it helped. It’s not easy. I sometimes detest going to the sessions, and I might be failing them quite miserably right now, especially with rule number two –“

           “What’s rule number two?”

           “Don’t hurt anyone,” Bucky mumbled. “And I’ve broken it quite a lot recently, I know that which will either make me end up behind bars or will add more therapy sessions to the list, but I’m not afraid anymore.”

           Y/N gulped, gazing just as intensely at Bucky as he was at her. “Of what?”

           “Of reaching out.” He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Of asking for help. Of understanding that I deserve help, and I deserve to receive it.”

           “Yeah, but the thing is I’m not like you.” Y/N looked away from him. “No one forced me to do this, no one brainwashed me. I did everything out of my own volition. Me. No one else. You deserve that help because HYDRA did all those things to you. You are a victim of war. I’m not. All those horrible things I did… I did them. Not some alias of mine.”

           Bucky’s heart hurt at the fact that Y/N couldn’t see she was a victim of her own circumstance, and how now the government was punishing her for it. And that’s when another brick hit him – it was exactly like Isaiah’s situation. Both came from marginalised groups, parts of society where the ones in power have been trying to oppress and control them for as long as he could remember, he just couldn’t see it. He could see Sam’s point of view now. Maybe not as clearly as he should, but he was starting to wipe away the fog.

           “They used you just as much as HYDRA used me.” He asserted, and Y/N’s eyes widened at his sure statement. “Just because a pile of shit has a bowtie on now, doesn’t mean it’s no longer a pile of shit… Come with us.” Bucky’s forehead pressed to hers. “Let’s do this the right way.”

           “It’s mandated by the US government that I stay by John’s side and help him.”

           Bucky smirked at that, nudging his nose against Y/N’s. “Well, it’s a good thing we’re in Latvia then. Besides Captain America has no pull here.”

           She laughed, warm breath slipping over Bucky’s skin, and he had to close his eyes as the thought of her breathless and underneath him invaded his mind. “Unfortunately, this deal stands whether I’m inside the borders of USA or outside.”

           Y/N looked over the skyline to where the country’s national monument stood. A woman, hands up in the air outstretched with three stars in her palms, with words she couldn’t understand when she'd arrived etched on the granite at the bottom. Some local had translated them for her. For the Fatherland and Freedom.

           After the blip and the experiments, she didn’t feel like she had a home. She’d been imprisoned and prodded like some lab bunny to see what her body could do. What her body could be used for.

           Bucky followed her gaze as she kept looking at the statue. Different stars, different saying, but still with the same meaning of what he saw when he looked at the Captain America shield. Freedom. Justice. For the love of their home.

Something deep started to burn in her chest, and even Bucky could feel the shift. 

           A ferocious look appeared in her eyes as she looked at him. “Let’s get that shield.” She wasn’t going to let Walker taint that star, she knew would happen if he had it for much longer.

           They’d had a single meeting beforehand, and during that half-hour, he’d been terrified for more than two-thirds of the time about how Y/N might die in his arms, die because she’d taken bullets meant for him. 

           He was so glad she hadn’t, not because it would be another life lost because of him, but because he felt like he’d found a twin flame – someone who’d understand him and his troubles. Someone he could help.

           Maybe that could be the true way he could make amends – help someone in the same situation.

           Bucky smiled.

           Y/N did so too, and his heart skipped a beat looking at the woman.

           Her body might be able to absorb the metals piercing it, Walker might call her a human shield, but he knew she was so much more than that. And he’d spend however long it took him to prove so to her. Maybe even in more ways than one.

_________________________________________________________________

Please reblog if you like this. For whatever reason my Bucky fics aren’t appearing in the tags :(

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[codenamewitcher]

Hooked from the Start || Din Djarin x Princess!Reader

*DO NOT read if you are under the age of 18!!*

Summary: Din Djarin ran into the Princess of Ayleen while on a hunt with the mercenaries and comes to find out that he can’t seem to shake her.

Word Count: 17.1k, oops (I also may release more parts to this as I have so many headcanons I want to write for these two)

Warnings: Third person POV and is mostly in Din’s. Contains violence, language, alcohol use, killing/death, angst, mentions of drug use, vague mentions of abuse, oral sex (f receiving), unprotected p in v sex (please use protection!!), injury, and hurt/comfort.

Translations are at the bottom as the first half doesn’t really contain Mando’a.

This does not contain Season 2 spoilers!

The first time the Mandalorian met Princess Y/n L/n of Ayleen was in a back alley in Kuat City, Y/n's knife was at the neck of the Mandalorian's, Ran's, Xi'an's, and Qin's target who'd also happened to be an enemy and traitor of her father's state.

"If you know what's good for you girl, you'll let him go." Ran said, approaching the Princess with caution, knowing that if she was to kill the target, they'd only receive a quarter of the price that was on the targets head, however, Ran still approached her with his blaster raised. All four of the mercenaries were ready to kill her the moment they found a way to do so without killing the target as well.  The Mandalorian was ready to kill her yet he found her interesting because normally people cowered when met with him and the mercenaries. Instead she smiled and then laughed at them, the Mandalorian knew she was going to be a challenge, especially when he spotted the Ayleenian armor that covered her body. 

"If you knew what was good for you, you would've left the moment you saw me." The mercenaries were too caught off guard by her statement that it took them a moment to realize that her knife was sliding across the target's throat and two knives were flying at Xi'an and Ran then another two at Qin and the Mandalorian. 

By the time the four were done dodging her blades, she was gone. Xi'an had seen her scale a wall and jump over it, but by the time they got over the wall, she was already gone. They tried hunting her down all over the city that night, but there wasn't a trace of her left behind, even when they went back for the body, her blades were gone. 

The mercenaries were all fuming that night because she'd killed their bounty and easily got away from them. 

The second time the Mandalorian and the Princess ran into each other was on Arkania. The Mandalorian had just left the mercenaries and began hunting on his own and one of his new bounties was hiding out on the icy planet. He'd spotted her leaning against a building wrapped in white fur to protect herself against the harsh freezing weather and to blend in with the snow. He'd planned on killing her out of revenge but stopped when he seen the glint of metal hidden within the fur she wore and her eyes looking right at him, a smirk gracing her lips.

"Did you come here to kill me Mandalorian?" Her voice rang clear across the snowy wasteland and it caused him to momentarily freeze. He didn't know what to say to her or what exactly it was that kept him from killing her on the spot. However, when she started to approach him, his hand immediately went to the blaster at his waist.

"Relax Mandalorian, if I was going to harm or kill you, it would've already happened." 

"Why aren't you?" He still kept his hand on his blaster, but didn't pull it out, she was close enough now that he could see a glint in her eyes. "Why are you here?"

"The same reason why you haven't killed me yet, because neither of us has made a move to do so yet." She crocked her head. "And don't worry Mandalorian, I'm not here to kill anyone. Well, at least a specific person." 

It was his turn to tilt his head at her and if his helmet was off, she'd see him glaring at her.

"If you're not here to kill me, then why are you here Mandalorian?" 

"I'm here for a bounty."

The Princess hummed and continued to look at the Mandalorian's visor, if he didn't know any better, he would've thought she could see his face and eyes by how she was studying him. Nothing was said between the two for a long time, but it wasn't an awkward silence, instead the two of them found it a little enjoyable. 

"Sister!" 

The unexpected shout broke both the Mandalorian's and Princess's focus on the other as they looked at the person yelling. The Mandalorian didn't know who the man was that was yelling and walking towards them but judging by the smile that was on the Princess's face and the similar facial features the Princess and the man shared he knew that she did. 

"Brother."  The man came to stand beside his sister, a smile adorning his face as he looked at the Mandalorian, it didn't take much for the Mandalorian to notice guards standing by in the distance, their eyes watching every move the Mandalorian made. The Mandalorian knew he'd be lying through his teeth if he said he felt at ease with the guards surrounding him, but he refused to make any sudden movement, he knew that those guard were here to protect the man and woman that stood before him.

"I didn't know my sister knew a Mandalorian," The man moved to stand by her, knocking his elbow against her own, he then moved to hold his hand out to shake the Mandalorian’s hand. “I’m Prince Y/B/N of Ayleen.”

Gears started to click in place inside the Mandalorian’s head, the girl he first met in a back alley in Kuat City wasn’t just any type of Ayleenian warrior but was also a princess. It also explained the guards and expensive clothing the two standing before him wore and it also explained the girl’s cryptic answer as to way she was here – she was protection. Despite being shocked, he didn’t let it show as he reached his hand out to shake the Prince’s hand.

The Mandalorian watched as one of their guards slowly approached them, clearing his throat to grab the attention of both royals.

“The King requests for your return.”

“Of course!” The Prince rolled his eyes. “I hate that our meeting is getting cut short, but it was a pleasure meeting you Mandalorian.” The Prince tilted his head down slightly in a farewell before turning around to follow the guard.

“Until next time Mandalorian.” The Princess turned to follow her brother but stopped and turned back to the Mandalorian. “And good luck with your hunt, hopefully someone hasn’t already beat you to the punch.”

A smirk was on her lips as she turned back to walk away, a guard staying behind to watch the Princess’s back and then falling behind her once she passed.

The third time the Mandalorian and Princess ran into each other they were both after two different targets that happened to not only be working with each other, but also happened to have backup. The two found themselves taking cover from blaster fire behind a crumbling wall that was falling apart even more and quickly.

“Got any ideas on what we’re supposed to do to get out of this Mandalorian?” The Princess panted besides the Mandalorian as she grabbed a few more knives hidden within the armor she wore.

“You brought knives to a gun fight.” The Mandalorian deadpanned as he watched the Princess, she laughed.

“Yes, I did.” She glanced over at him, a smirk on her face despite being fired upon and dust flying around them from the impact. “They can be just as deadly as any blaster.” She twirled a blade across her fingers and then tapped it against his beskar, but still careful to not scratch it. “I’m still not hearing any ideas.”

He signed and looked away from her, taking in their surrounds, possibilities of taking out the enemy running through his head.

The Princess peaked her head around the wall they were cowering behind, taking in how many men and where they were as they shot at the pair. She immediately moved her head back behind the wall as a blaster shot hit where her head was moments ago.

“Not only is this wall falling apart, but they are moving in and our targets are escaping.”

“Where are they at?” The Mandalorian asked as he zeroed in on the tall end of a X-34 Landspeeder to his right, hoping some of their target’s backup was within blast range.

“Three to the right, four in the middle, and another three to the left. I also have an idea on where our targets are escaping to.”

“How close are some of them to that speeder?”

“Close enough, but I don’t think this wall would hold up.”

The Mandalorian knew what she meant, he could handle most of the fallout from the blast due to his armor, but she however couldn’t. There was already a plan forming in his head, so when she turned his back to him to peak around the wall once again, he turned to face the landspeeder and shot at its gas tank with his blaster. He knew that the single shot would hit it, so once he pulled the trigger, he was already turning around and grabbing the Princess to cover her body with his own.

The Princess was right in the sense that the wall wouldn’t hold up, however the wall didn’t completely fall and the Mandalorian took most of the damage.

“Can you get up?” The Princess asked from underneath him after the blast was over and done with.

“Yeah.” The Mandalorian planted his hands on the ground and slowly lifted himself up, dust and debris falling off his body and armor as he did so. When he was able to sit back the Princess got up herself, she immediately went to peak around what was left of the wall but jumped back when a blaster was fired at her yet again.

“There’s five of them left.” She said looking at the Mandalorian up and down, checking for injuries. “Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine.” He grunted as he pulled a rock form a crevice in his armor. “Are you?”

“No,” A smile then spread across her face. “I think we can take all five of them if you’re up to it.”

The Mandalorian shook his head as he grabbed for two of his blasters, he was somewhat in a state of disbelief with the Princess because she was constantly proving him wrong in how he thought she would react to dangerous situations. When he first met her, he just believed that she was an Ayleenian warrior but that she would’ve given up the target being faced with him and the mercenaries instead she smiled, went against their orders, threw knives at them, and disappeared. Then the second time when he found out she was a princess, he still expected her to carry some of the stereotypical behaviors of a princess for future run-ins but instead of screaming at him for risking her life, she’s smiling at him.

“Ready?” She already had her blades pulled out. The Mandalorian didn’t say anything, but just nodded and that seemed to be all the Princess needed as she immediately shot up and started throwing her knives. The Mandalorian followed suit, shooting down their targets’ guards. It was a combination of the two ducting behind the wall they first took cover behind and blades and blaster fire flying across the town square they happened to be in.

Once the last guard was down, the Princess was already going around the wall and picking up and pulling out her blades and sliding them back into the many hidden spaces on her body after wiping off the blood on the blades. While she was busy doing that, the Mandalorian reloaded his blasters and pulled out the tracking fob he had on his own target. The Princess walked up to him, looking at the fob.

“That must be handy.”

The Mandalorian looked up at her. “You don’t have one?”

“Normally no, my father and I have contacts all over the galaxy. When my father assigns me a task, I make some calls, and get their location. It also helps when one of them takes an Ayleenian ship, they’re much easier to track then. Rogue senators in my father’s court are also easy to track as a lot of them take a lot and spend a lot of money.” She looks around at the damage done to the town square from their fire fight. “Sometimes I get lucky when it happens to be someone that already has a tracking fob on them and I run into a bounty hunter that is after the same person, but other than that, no.”

The Mandalorian hums, he knew very little about the interworking’s of Ayleen as the plant and its government is very secretive, but he did know that the Royal Court was very dangerous, and that each person had to fight to get to their position. So, her mentioning going after her father’s senators didn’t surprise him that much.

“I saw them head that way.” She said, pointing her thumb over her shoulder back behind her. The Mandalorian started heading in that direction, the Princess spinning on her heels and following after him. Nothing else was said between the two as they tracked their targets, the only noise being the steady beep of his tracker and the gravel and dirt crunching under their feet.

It didn’t take the Princess and Mandalorian long to find the two they were after hiding out in a bar. After another large commotion and chasing quarries into a back alley, the Mandalorian and the Princess caught the two.

When the two got to the point of going their separate ways, the Princess turned to the Mandalorian, a smile gracing her lips.

“This was fun, we should do this again.” The Mandalorian turned his head away from her, looking ahead, he couldn’t see himself intentionally seeking her out for help, but did turn his head to look back at her once she spoke again. “My name is Y/n, if you ever find yourself needing help on a bounty, come to Ayleen and mention my name. They should let you in.”

Underneath the Mandalorian’s helmet, he caught himself mouthing her name, instantly loving her name but stopped because he felt like a teenage boy with the silly little crush he started having for her.

“Take care of yourself, Mandalorian.” She then turned and walked off after her farewell.

The fourth time the two ran into each other was on Raydonia, like usual the Mandalorian was after someone but the Princess had no mission, instead sat at a bar, a drink clutched between her hands. The Mandalorian walked up and leaned his elbow on the counter, crossing his ankles while he faced the Princess.

“What are you doing here?” The Mandalorian asked her while she looked up at him. There was a look in her eyes that he hadn’t seen before, but he knew that whatever her eyes held, it wasn’t good.

“To get far, far away from my father.” She said and turned back to her drink. He knew something was off with her despite only running into her three times before this because every time she had a smile on her face even when faced with danger.

Normally the Mandalorian would turn away and continue on with his life, not bothering himself with other people’s problems. That was normally, but somehow, someway the Princess had wormed her way into forming a soft spot in the armor the Mandalorian wore around his heart. The part of him that began to care for the woman asked her why she was avoiding her father, however the other part of him that didn’t let anyone close was kicking himself for it. He still asked her way.

She let out a humorless chuckle, knocked the rest of her drink back, slammed it back on the counter, and turned to him. “I don’t want to scare you off by unloading all of my problems with my father on you.”

She then got up and headed for the door to leave the bar, the Mandalorian’s feet started moving after her without much thought or his permission. He continued to quietly follow her out of the small town until she stopped in the middle of an empty field, her arms coming up to wrap themselves around her body while she looked up at the moon that orbited Raydonia.

“You’re still here.” She stated without turning to look at him, without moving at all.

“I am.” He said, moving to stand next to her and looking up at the moon as well. He didn’t know how long they stood like that, silence surrounding them while she battled whatever inter demon she was battling.

“I don’t want your pity.” She finally spoke, breaking the silence.

“You won’t get it.”

“Good.” Out of the corner of his eye, he could see her worrying on her lower lip as she debated on whether she was going to spill what was on her mind or not. “My father killed my mother because she gave birth to me.”

The Mandalorian said nothing, didn’t do anything, because he was not expecting that and it shocked him a little bit.

“It’s royal tradition on Ayleen that if a girl is born in the direct line of succession to the throne, the child or mother has to die. My father began hating me the moment my mother gave up her life for my own and he likes to throw it in my face every now and then, especially when I come back from a mission and don’t fully deliver on what was asked of me.”

The Mandalorian didn’t know what to say to that and not show pity, but she continued on, momentarily taking the pressure of saying anything away from him.

“She made my brother promise that he would always have my back and to never blame me for her death as it was her choice not mine and he did just that.” He watched as she looked down at the ground and started kicking the toe of her boot into the dirt. “I can’t wait for the day when my brother ascends to the throne because he has already promised me that he will do away with that ridiculous tradition and give me free range on anyone that has an issue with it.”

She didn’t say anything else after that and for a while the Mandalorian didn’t offer anything until his mind started wondering to the bounty he was on this planet for.

“I’m here for a bounty that is supposed to be hard to catch,” The Mandalorian began his offer, watching out of the corner of his eye as the Princess turned to look up at him. “Wanna tag along?”

He looked down at the Princess, waiting for an answer to his offer. A small smile spread across her face and the Mandalorian found himself thanking the stars for it, he decided then that he really liked the Princess’s smile.

“I would like that.”

After that hunt, the Mandalorian knew that he wanted to see more of her besides the run ins they had. So, he gave her a commlink before he left her on Raydonia to take the bounty back to the Guild.

At first the commlink was only used when the other was going on a hunt and wondered if the other would be near to tag along, then eventually, they talked through it and to each other regularly. He liked having the extra help from her as she didn’t require a percentage of the earnings because as she put it, being a Princess allowed her to not worry about money. And an unspoken understanding of each other and a bond had formed between the two as they talked and helped the other out when nearby throughout the many years of communication.

It was because of those many years of the relationship that neither had put a title on, the Mandalorian found that he trusted her and was comfortable around her as she never passed judgement towards him for the terrible things he’s done in his past and that she was also respectful towards his culture.

It was five years after he gave her the commlink when he finally told her about his parents and how he became a Mandalorian. They were sitting in the cockpit of the Razor Crest, traveling through space at hyperlight speed with his quarry in carbonite that she helped capture. They were sharing stories about some of the ridiculous things some of their targets have done when he asked her if he could tell her something important, something that stayed between them. She’d agreed and when he told her about his parents’ death, how the Mandalorians saved him and took him in, she didn’t say anything but took his hand in her own and squeezed it. She never offered an apology for it happening, she just squeezed his hand letting him know that she was here, because she knew that with her own experience of losing a parent that apologies got old and they got old real fast. It was why she asked for him to not pity her five years before he shared this with her.

It was because of that trust as to why he was currently being escorted by Ayleenian guards through the palace to wherever it was the Princess was at, looking for her help. The little green frog eater he was currently on the run for was in his floating bassinet besides the Mandalorian, big eyes finding the castle halls they walked through fascinating. This was the first place he came to after taking the kid back, he knew he would need someone to help protect and care for the Child. The Princess was that someone and she was happy to help, she told him so. He couldn’t help but think of how the Princess would find the Child cute and think of the look on her face as she would coo at the Child. He knew she would, and it brought a smile to his face.

As they walked through the halls, he also found himself thinking of the time she’d called him through the commlink nine years ago, announcing that her father had passed away and her brother had ascended to the throne. It was because of that news they met on a nearby planet later that week, celebrating on his ship. It was that night he found that not only he trusted her, but she trusted him just as much. He knew this when she put a blindfold on over her eyes so that both of them could drink and celebrate her freedom together, because that’s what her father’s death meant for the Princess. That was also the first night they’d kissed.

Again, they’d never put a title on the relationship they had, but they never found themselves in someone’s bed that wasn’t the others either. They both knew that they were friends and lovers, but they just never felt the need for a label, they just had each other.

His thoughts were cut short as the guards opened the throne room doors and he found his Princess, her brother, and another woman chasing three screaming and giggling kids around the room. His heart swelled at the sight of Y/n, he already thought her to be the most beautiful woman in space, but seeing her in one of her court dresses, smiling, and giggling as she played with the children he’d guessed to be her nieces and nephew.

Y/n stopped chasing the children around when him and the guards walked into the room. Her eyes were sparkling with joy and if that wasn’t enough to indicate her happiness, the large grin she held on her face was.

“Aunty!” One of the girls yelled and clang to her leg, taking the attention the Mandalorian and Princess had on each other away from themselves and towards herself. The girl swayed on her feet as she looked up at her aunt, out of breath and a large toothy grin on her face.

Seeing the Princess happy with her family warmed the Mandalorian’s heart but also didn’t help in making him feel guilty for asking for her help. However, she knew he was coming, why he was coming, why he was currently on the run, and had offered to help him in finding a safe place for the child.

“Who’s that?” The little boy that stood by the other woman in the room, pointing his finger at the Mandalorian. Y/n glanced at her nephew and then back at the Mandalorian.

“That’s the Mandalorian I’ve told you stories about.” She said, still looking at the Mandalorian but with love in her eyes; his heart swelled yet again. “Mando, this is Alli.” She patted the girl’s head that clung to her leg. “That’s Jackson,” She pointed to the little boy. “Brea,” she pointed to the eldest girl. “And that’s Jessika, my brother’s wife and the mother to these three goofballs. Kids, Jessika, this is Mando.”

The kids all waved at him and Jessika smiled at him.

“Alright kids, it’s time to get ready for bed.” The King of Ayleen announced, the kids all collectively groaned.

“But daddy!” Alli whined, throwing her head back but still holding onto Y/n’s leg.

“Come, let’s give your aunt alone time with her friend.” The kids groaned and stomped while they followed their mother and father through one of the side doors of the throne room. When the door shut behind them and Y/n waved the lingering guards off, and she stepped towards the Mandalorian. Her attention was yet again fully on him but got taken away when the Child cooed and made grabby hands at the Princess.

Just like he suspected, she was immediately cooing at the Child and telling him how cute and adorable he was. And while the Mandalorian watched her interact with the goblin, he fully took in her appearance.

She wore a dress the color of a stormy sea and with every movement, the fabric shifted like waves. He didn’t know much about dresses and what to call the intricate pulls, ties, and designs of the dress but he knew that he loved it on her – that it fit her. He also knew that while he loved it on her, he would love to see her without it on and pooled at her feet.

And while they never specified what their relationship was, he knew that he wanted to call her his riduur one day and wanted to see her in this dress as they exchanged vows. And stars, after seeing her play with the kids like that, he knew he wanted to see the same thing again but with their own kids. He already knew he was in love with the Princess, but seeing her like this, he wasn’t just in love, he was hopelessly in love.

“I understand why you stole him back.” Y/n said, snapping him out of his daydream. She let the Child hold onto her hand and peered up at the Mandalorian, a soft smile gracing her lips. “I just have a few more things to pack, need to change, and then say goodbye to the kids and I’ll be ready to leave.”

“Thank you.” He said, his fingertips brushing across her cheekbone, she leaned into his touch. She captivated him, he still found it hard to not just stand and stare at her all day, he also found it harder throughout the years to keep his hands off her.

“Of course.” She took his hand in her own and kissed his gloved fingertips. After giving his hand a squeeze, she dropped it and turned her attention to the Child who was still playing with her fingers.

“Okay now little mister,” She leaned down where she was eye level with the Child. “I’ve got to get ready so we can leave. So, I will need these back.” She slowly took her hand away from the Child and then patted his head before she stepped away from him.

She tilted her head for the Mandalorian and the Child to follow after her. They walked side by side down the hall towards her room, their fingers brushing each other as they walked but never entangling, both of them enjoying being in the other’s presence.

When they reached her room, the Mandalorian noticed a bag already on her bed as she was already rushing around her room, grabbing a few more clothes of their hangers and shoving them in her bag but keeping a set out before zipping the bag up.

“Unzip me, please.” She said, turning her back so it would face the Mandalorian. It took every ounce of self-restraint in himself to not throw her on her bed and take her right then and there. It had been too long since he last fucked her and this action had him teetering at the edge. He began to wonder if she really needed his help unzipping her dress as he spotted a few similar dresses in the room in different colors and then seeing the way she bit her lip in the reflection of one of the mirrors in her room. A brief thought of the night they’d spent on Abafar, that had ended in them having sex for this first time and him telling her his name, had crossed his mind. Somehow despite these thoughts, he managed to complete the task, but he didn’t however miss the goosebumps that appeared across her back from his fingertips ghosting down her spine while he pulled the zipper down. Once his hands left her back, she peaked over her shoulder at him, a small, sweet smile on her lips but her eyes held sparkles of mischief.

She knew exactly what she was doing to him.

She stepped away from him before he could pull her body into his and grabbed the set of clothes she laid out on her bed, walking behind a privacy screen in her room afterwards. He watched as the dress she wore was draped over the screen and the other set of clothes were pulled down one by one as she changed. Then she walked out, tying a leather brace onto her arm one of the laces in between her teeth as she used her other hand to tie it. She walked up to a cabinet as she did so and stopped before it while she finished off the last knot and then she opened the cabinet up.

Part of him was in awe but wasn’t surprised to find the cabinet filled with all different types of knifes and blades. He watched as the blades slowly disappeared as she slid them into the many areas built into her armor to hold the knives. When she finished arming herself, she grabbed two bundles of leather and a pair boots in one hand, and with the other hand, she grabbed a fist full of knives.

After knocking the doors shut with her elbow, she turned around facing the Mandalorian and headed to her bed where she sat at the edge. He watched as she slipped the boots on and placed more blades on the inside of her boots.

She once told him that certain royal families within the court had their daughters train as warriors of Ayleen who specialized in fighting with knives and blades as their ancestors once did. They still learned how to fire a blaster and still carried one, but the knives and blades were their preferred method of fighting. She’d also explained to him once that their armor wasn’t just made of leather, but underneath it was Ayleenian steel, the leather was there to make it seem like they weren’t protected from blaster fire.

“What’s bound in the leather?” He asked when she slid the last blade in her boot, she looked up at him, a smirk ghosting her lips.

“More blades.” He snorted at her answer, shaking his head, of course. “Ready?” She asked after slipping the bounds of leather into a side pocket on her bag.

He walked up to her, toe to toe, and leaned his forehead up against hers. At first, he starred into her eyes, her own meeting his under the helmet even though she couldn’t see them, then he closed his eyes enjoying her presence, wanting and needed this momentary peace before they had to go on the run.

He took a deep breath, held it, and then exhaled. “Yes.”

“Okay.” She whispered and then broke the keldabe kiss to place her own on the cheek of his helmet. “I like the new armor, by the way.” She whispered before moving away. He felt his face get warm at her comment and Maker was he glad she couldn’t see his face. He reached to grab her bag, but she beat him to the punch and swung it on her shoulder. She smiled and then walked to her door, holding it open waiting for the Mandalorian and the Child to walk out. She turned the lights off, shut and locked her door before continuing to lead the them through the winding hallways.

They eventually arrived at a back entrance of the castle that lead out to the castle’s docking yard, Y/n’s brother, nieces, and nephew stood by the door waiting for them and the moment the three children seen their Aunt, they came running for her.

While the kids were bombarding their Aunt with questions of when she’d be back and how long she’d be gone, their voices raising one over the others, her brother walked up to the Mandalorian.

“I know that she is more than capable with taking care of herself,” The King paused looking into the Mandalorian’s vizor. “But please continue to watch my sister’s back like you have been for the past 17 years.”

“I will.” The Mandalorian promised, knowing that her brother worried for her even though they only met a handful of times, and he meant it as he knows he wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice himself to save Y/n because he loved her too much not to. The King nodded and then brought his attention to his kids crowding his sister.

After the Princess said her goodbyes to her nieces, nephew, and brother, her, the Mandalorian, and the Child headed to the Razor Crest and left Ayleen.

The three had traveled for two weeks before landing on Sorgan.

“Two bowls of bone broth please.” The Mandalorian told the proprietor of the common house they were in while Y/n got the Child situated in a highchair.

“I swear you never eat.” The Princess said after getting the Child to calm down a little.

“What do you expect me to do, use a straw?” He asked, dragging his eyes away from the woman in armor that was staring the three of them down to look at the Princess.

A smile spread across her face and a giggle escaped her lips, “That would be a sight I would love to see.”

He shook his head and looked back at the woman that was starring them down seconds ago only to find the corner empty.

“Stay here with the kid.” He said getting up going out the back of the common house, trying to track down the woman.

The Princess glared at the back of his helmet and continued to do so until he was no longer in her line of sight. The proprietor laid out two bowls of broth before the Princess and Child, after thanking the woman, Y/n turned to the Child.

“He really thinks I’m going to sit here and stay put, doesn’t he?” The Child angled his head and cooed at the Princess’s words. She laughed and took him out of his highchair, placing a bowl of broth in his hands. “Come on, let’s see what kind of trouble he has gotten himself into.”

The Child followed after the Princess as she walked in the direction she seen the Mandalorian walk off to. By the time her and the Child come across the Mandalorian, they found him and the woman he was after on the ground, pointing blasters at each other.

The Princess clears her throat grabbing both of their attention, “Are y’all just going to sit there and point blasters at each other or are you going to do something?”

The Princess had a hand on her hip and the other hanging by her side and while her pose didn’t seem threatening, the Mandalorian knew that her free hand was ready to grab a knife and attack. The Mandalorian sighed and shock his head anyways at her, then looked at the woman he just got into an altercation with.

“Would you like some soup?” The Mandalorian asked the woman.

She agreed and they later found out that her name was Cara. She told them that she was an ex-shock trooper and shared stories of her days on the battlefield and how she ended up here while they sat at the table they originally sat at before they met her.

“So, how does a Mandalorian and an Ayleenian warrior end up together?” Cara asked after getting done with her story and apologizing for coming at the Mandalorian earlier.

The Princess snorted besides him as she sipped at her broth, he glanced at her, but she shrugged with a smirk gracing her lips.

“We had a common target when we first met and kept running into each other afterwards, so we started working together.” The Mandalorian sighed.

“Aw, you left out the best part!” The Princess said, setting down her bowl, Cara raised an eyebrow at the Princess wanting her to go on. “I beat him and his buddies in finding and killing their quarry before they could get to him. And then, I escaped without an issue.”

The Mandalorian knocked his elbow into the Princess’s arm and leaned back against the wall, Cara laughed at the pair.

“Well,” Cara started but finished off her soup before continuing. “Seeing as we’re all on the run, one of us is going to need to get a move on, and I was here first.” She got up to leave. “Thanks for the soup.”

“Looks like this planet is taken.” The Mandalorian said once Cara left, he got up. “Let’s grab a few things and go.”

“Fine,” The Princess huffed, drinking the last bit of her broth before helping the Mandalorian with the Child. “Sucks, I didn’t get a chance to fight her myself and see just how good she is.” The Princess teased, a smirk on her lips while the Mandalorian shook his head at her antics.

Little did the Princess know, there was also a smile on the Mandalorian’s face as they walked out of the common house.

By the time they made it back it was almost dark out. The Child sat on the Princess’s hip while the Mandalorian carried supplies up the ship.

“I need to make some repairs on the ship before we leave.” He said placing the supplies down and going to grab the toolbox. He stopped right before the Princess and the Child, looking down at the two.

“Do you need any help?” She asked while the Child reached out for him, he held out his finger for the Child to hold onto.

“I love you, cyar’ika, but you’re shit at mechanic work.” She laughed and shrugged her shoulders.

“Can’t say I didn’t offer to help.” The Mandalorian laughed, the child cooed and a warm feeling spreading through his chest. This could be his own little family and it was already beginning to feel like it.

But he shook the thought from his head as he was reminded of them being on the search to find a safe place for the Child, not to start a family. That also seemed like something him or the Princess couldn’t do with her being committed to her people and him to his own.

He took has finger away from the Child’s hand and rubbed his head. The Mandalorian settled for giving the Princess a brief keldabe kiss before walking down the ramp to do the needed repairs. The thought of a family still making its presence known in the back of his mind as he did so.

The Princess had laid a blanket in the middle of the haul’s floor, her and the Child sitting on top of it while they played with the knob the Child was currently obsessed with.

Even though she’s only known the Child for two weeks, the Princess knew that she’d die for the kid and like the Mandalorian that was outside doing repairs, the Child had managed to find a place in her heart. She knew that the whole point of this mission was to find him a safe place to live where he wouldn’t be hunted but the Princess had begun to dread the day they were to find him a home.

The Princess set back, moving her legs out from underneath herself, the thought of a home running circles in her mind as she continued to roll the knob across the blanket.

She didn’t really know what it was like to have a home. Yeah, she lived in a castle, but that place housed dark memories that even her brother’s kids couldn’t chase away.

She never felt comfortable.

The only place that had gotten close to a home and a comfortable place for the Princess was here on this ship with Din, even if the ship was always cold. She still wasn’t sure if this was necessarily a home either.

She’d always imagined that a home would be in a quiet place, where politics and military strategies weren’t being discussed in another hall, where she wasn’t consistently running whether it was at someone or from someone. But even then, the Princess still wasn’t sure what a home was as she never had it. Stars, it could be right in front of her, but she wouldn’t be able to tell it because she just didn’t know what it’s supposed to feel like.

How were they even supposed to find the Child a safe home when she didn’t know what one was and Din, himself, had once admitted to her that he wasn’t sure what a home was supposed to feel like.

Her thoughts were cut short when the ramp of the crest opened. She heard more than one voice, she couldn’t make out the words, but it put her on edge.

Y/n was quick in hiding the Child and pulling out a knife, ready to attack just in case. She watched as Din began to climb the ramp and then suddenly stop, turning around to face the direction of the two other voices she could hear.

“Where do you live?” She heard him rasp as she stepped forward to hear what the other two voices were saying but still far enough back that they couldn’t see her.

“On a farm. Weren’t you listening?” She heard one voice say.

“We’re farmers.” The other chimed in. After deeming them not a threat, Y/n slipped her knife back into its original place and stepped out where the farmers could see her. The one who’d just chimed in on the conversation, looked up at the Princess with wide eyes while his buddy and the Mandalorian continued on with the discussion.

“In the middle of nowhere?”

“Yes.”

“You have lodging?”

“Yeah, absolutely.”

The Mandalorian turned back to the Princess. “They want our help to get rid of some riders, you up for it?”

“Why not?” She shrugged her shoulders and Din nodded in return.

“Good,” He turned back to the farmers. “Come up and help.”

They scampered up the ramp to start gathering the supplies the Mandalorian told them to get. He walked up to the Princess who was now holding the Child to keep him out of the way.

“I’m going to go find Cara for help.” He said, running his knuckles along Y/n’s cheekbones, not missing the way slight shivers went through her body. “Make sure they get everything we’ll need.”

Y/n nodded, watching as he ran a finger along the Child’s ear and then left, telling the farmers that he would be back on his way out.

“So, we’re basically running off a band of raiders for lunch money?” Cara asked, leaning back in the speeder, making herself comfortable.

“They’re quartering us in the middle of nowhere.” The Mandalorian started, but careful to not be too loud and to not make much movement as the Princess’s head laid on his shoulder while she and the Child cradled in her arms slept. “Last I checked, that’s a pretty square deal for somebody in your position.” He paused looking down at the woman he was in love with. “Worst case scenario, you tune up your blaster. Best case, we’re a deterrent.”

Cara snorted as she watched the way the Mandalorian acted with Y/n’s head on his shoulder.

“I can’t imagine there’s anything living in these trees that an ex-shock trooper couldn’t handle.” He finished, looking back a Cara.

Cara hummed, “What’s going on between you two, are you married?”

The Mandalorian stilled, thinking of an answer, if he even wanted to answer the question. He was quiet long enough that Cara assumed he wasn’t going to answer her question until finally he broke the silence.

“No,” He glanced back down at the Princess and Child. “We’ve never put a name on it.”

He noticed that Y/n’s mouth was slightly open and took that as the chance to carefully move so that his arm was leaning on the edge of the speeder and around her shoulders. He’d learned over the years that when her mouth fell open in her sleep, that she was in a deep sleep, and it would take more than a few movements on his part to fully wake her up.

“We should get some sleep.” The Mandalorian stated, getting more comfortable with Y/n leaning up against him, Cara agreed.

“I know Ayleen fought to Restore the Republic, but where were you during the war?” Cara asked the Princess.

They were the only ones left sitting at the campfire the villagers put together that night, everyone had gone to bed besides them and Din left to go put the Child to sleep and eat. Y/n didn’t say anything for a while, starring at the flames, her legs spread out before her with her ankles cross, feet moving side to side while she thought of what to say.

“Most of Ayleen’s warriors fought in several battles like Scarif and Endor, but I wasn’t on the battlefield like that.” Y/n gabbed a stick, poking at the logs to keep the fire going and to give her something to do while she talked about the past. “The King had a secret guard that was assigned missions to take out traitors who double crossed the Alliance and gave information to the Empire along with assignments of discovering information.” Y/n paused again setting the stick down and taking a deep breath. “As his daughter, I was placed in his secret guard. I was the leader but each of us were sent on individual missions as they were basically assassinations and its better and easier to sneak around and kill people alone. The only missions where we were a full unit was to uncover needed information and those were few in between.”

“Wait you’re a princess?” Cara asked, eyes squinting at Y/n.

“Yeah.”

“I know Princess Leia did, but princesses normally don’t fight in wars.” Cara raised an eyebrow. Y/n didn’t take any offence as she was used to it by now as her father worked to keep the innerworkings of the Ayleen government secretive from the Galaxy.

“The princesses of Ayleen’s royal bloodline learn to fight as a woman doesn’t sit on the throne in Ayleen.” Y/n shrugged her shoulders. “And my father was a traditionalist.”

“Aren’t they usually?” Cara said, taking a slip from her flask. Y/n laughed and stood up, the day’s exhaustion finally catching up to her.

“I’m honestly surprised that my father didn’t bring back to the old fights that politicians held to gain power within the court, I know he considered it once.” Cara’s eyes widened.

“You’re kidding.” Y/n shook her head.

“Living on Ayleen has always been brutal, but my brother and I are working to better that. It still is, as my father wasn’t the only traditionalist on the planet, which is why Mando and I are not looking at Ayleen to keep the Child safe.” Cara hummed. The Princess could see that Cara had more questions to ask her, but she was tired and didn’t necessarily want to talk anymore about Ayleen’s history. “I’m going to bed, but I will see you tomorrow to scope out the raider’s base.”

“See you bright and early, princess.” Cara said in a teasing voice, raising the flask as a toast. Y/n rolled her eyes and headed to the barn that her, Din, and the Child were sharing.

She rasped her knuckles against the wooden door, waiting for Din to give the okay to come in, not wanting to walk in while his helmet was off. Once she got the okay, she pushed the door open to find Din holding the Child in his arms, laying in the cot they made with hay and blankets, the arm holding the Child was propped up on a small pile of hay. After shutting the door, Y/n grabbed a folded blanket and went to go lay down next to the Mandalorian.

“Did you eat?” Y/n whispered, trying not to wake the Child up.

“Yes.” Din whispered back, turning his head from the goblin in his arms to Y/n, watching as she unfolded the blanket and spread it out to cover their legs. “Come here.”

Y/n scooted closer to him and into his side, her head laying down on his chest plate, legs tangling with his while his arm wrapped around her shoulder, bringing her closer to him. She placed a small kiss on the beskar and then laid her cheek and a hand against it, watching the Child sleep.

“I love you.” She whispered; voice filled with sleep.

“I love you, too.” Din said back, wishing that he could kiss her, but settled for squeezing her shouldrs before they dozed off.

It was raining and it was raining hard. The Princess, Mandalorian, and ex-Shock Trooper had already spent a week preparing the village to fight the raiders who they’d discovered owned an AT-ST Raider. They’d originally planned on another training session today, but decided to stay in, because of Y/n’s concern for people getting sick from the cold rain and allotting them fewer fighters for the upcoming battle. And mainly for the fact that the Mandalorian was a “living, breathing lightening rod” as the Princess had put it during the small meeting they held with Cara and Omera earlier.

“It’s quiet here.” The Princess said, shifting to snuggle deeper into Din’s side, searching for warmth while the two of them watched the Child chase a frog that found its way into the barn. They’d made a makeshift pallet after their meeting with hay and hay bells to lean against, a blanket spread over it to keep from being poked by the hay.

“It was until you spoke.” The Mandalorian joked. Y/n elbowed his side, smiles gracing both of their lips.

“You know what I mean.” She laughed and laid her chin on his chest plate, looking up at the ‘T’ shaped vizor on his helmet, a smile lingering on her face. “He likes it here.”

Din hummed in agreement while he brushed his thumb over Y/n’s eyebrow. “I can’t imagine how peaceful it must have been here before the raiders.”

Y/n was quiet as she looked down to start running her fingers along the edge of his chest plate, a serious look over taking her facial features. “Do you think we can manage to fight them off and their AT-ST Raider? This goes beyond my expertise.”

Din froze, not really sure on what to tell her because he didn’t know himself. “I’m not sure, but think we’ve got the best plan under the current circumstances.”

She stopped tracing the beskar and laid her cheek against it, looking towards the Child. “I think you’re right in this place being peaceful before the raiders, because they are willing to put their lives on the line to regain that peace.”

“I think so too.” Din whispered, running his hand from her neck down her back, stopping at its middle and flattening it against her back. They continued to silently watch the Child chase the frog up until lightning struck in the distance and sent a loud rumble through the barn. The Child dropped the frog out of fear and came running to his two caretakers.

The Princess sat up to catch him in her arms, where she was quick in cradling the Child and quieting his small cries before they built up into something worse. Din’s heart melted at the sight, especially when she leaned back on him, situating herself between his arm and side, not once taking her eyes off the Child.

“I didn’t know you were so good with kids.” He said watching as she gave the Child her hand to hold onto, quieting him.

“Well, after being forced to watch my brother’s children when they were babies, I picked up on a few things.” She whispered before she started softly humming and rocking the Child to sleep. The Mandalorian watched her in amazement.

He’d never pictured or imagined himself starting his own family as it all it had ever been was providing for the Covert, that was until these past three weeks. Where he saw the way that Y/n had interacted with children, the smile on her face as she played with them, and the way that she’d immediately began to care for the Child like he was her own.

It was expected by the elders for the Mandalorian to have his own kids one day but he had never considered the thought of having children of his own until now and it was a foreign feeling that he wasn’t completely sure on how to process it. It made his heart speed up, melt, and grow all at once and it brought a smile on his face when he watched her interact with kids and imagined building a home with the Princess where their own children could run around and play.

“What are you thinking about?” Y/n asked softly, keeping the surroundings calm for the Child as she lightly rocked him. The question caught him off guard and he didn’t know what to say as what he was thinking about has never been discussed between them.

And the last thing he wanted to do was scare her off by telling her of his daydreams where they got married, had children, and made a home for themselves.

“About how beautiful you look and how caring you are with the Child.” He says he least risky thing he can think of without outright lying to her, he’s found over the years that he hates lying to her and tries to avoid it as much as possible. And what he told her wasn’t a lie either as he did believe she looked beautiful sitting there with the Child in her arms.

“Oh yeah?” She looked up at him, a smile gracing her lips. Maker did he love her smile.

“Yeah.” He whispered back, the smile that was already on his face growing as Y/n snuggled into him further where her head leaned on his shoulder, he wrapped him arm around her and the Child.

The Mandalorian found that despite the danger that they were facing, he found himself content, laying here with her and the Child listening to the beat of rain against the barn and the soft rolls of thunder. It was a moment of temporary peace that he was going to drink every last drop of as he rarely got to have a taste of it.

Din Djarin could have sworn his heart momentarily stopped as he caught onto what the Princess had decided to do in order to save the village. He watched in horror as she grabbed his Amban rifle, jumped over the barricades and ran out into the battlefield.

It was a mixture of horror and awe as he watched her run across the field and towards a pond, dirt and blaster fire rain down and flew around her. But the initial shock wore off quickly as it started and he began chasing after her, shooting down anyone who had their blasters pointed at him and her.

He watched as she got in the pond and shot at the AT-ST, trying to provoke its drivers to come towards her in the water while he continued to run towards her.

He could hear and feel his heartbeat in his ears and under his skin as he watched the AT-ST take the bait and step in the pond.

He wanted to dive in the pond and pull her out of the danger, but he realized that she would’ve been angry at him if he didn’t do something in aid of her hail Mary. So, he grabbed thermal detonators hidden in his armor and threw them at the chassis of the AT-ST. He quickly slid into the pond, pulled Y/n towards him against the wall of the pond, and shielded her with his body as the blast goes off.

The AT-ST fell into the pond, causing a large splash to fall on them and waves to push them further into the wall. He continued to hold onto her in fear that if he let go, she may slip under the water and not come back up.

He knew it was irrational to believe that, but he genuinely thought he was about to lose her, and he didn’t know if he could live after something like that.

Once the waves calmed, blaster fire stopped, and cheers filled the air, the Mandalorian pulled away to check for any injuries. He could barely see her eyes in the dark, but he could tell by the way she looked up at him and the unreadable expression on her face, she was reacting to this differently compared to in the past where she’d smile and laugh it off. Instead, she moved his hands away from her face and threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck, he realized she was shaking a little bit.

“Never do something like that again, please cyar’ika.” He whispered in her ear, wrapping his arms around her waist, and holding her tightly to his body.

“Okay,” She whispered back and tightening her arms around him to pull him closer. The Mandalorian realized then that between them constantly throwing themselves in harm’s way that he didn’t want to spend another moment where there wasn’t a title for their relationship, where he wasn’t married to her.

He pulled away from her, looking her in the eyes to make sure she knows he’s serious with the next words he’s about to speak.

“I want to marry you.”

He could hear his heartbeat pound in his ears once again as she stood there in the pond with him, taking in his words. Finally telling her felt like a relief and a major fuck up all at once, it felt like a hand was wrapped around his heart and like an invisible weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

But she didn’t say anything as she placed her hands on the slides of his helmet and pulled him into a keldabe kiss and he still don’t know what her answer was, it kinda scared him shitless.

“I do too.”

It was two days before they’d planned on departing from Sorgan and the day the Princess and Mandalorian planned on getting married.

Y/n currently sat in the barn her and the Mandalorian shared, some of the village girls put small white flowers in her hair, Omera directing the children on placement of flowers.

Y/n and Din had decided that while they wanted to get married while they were on Sorgan, they didn’t want a bunch of the villagers attending the wedding as neither of them felt comfortable enough to do so. In fact, it was only going to be her and the Mandalorian, they wanted the moment to be private and intimate, they didn’t feel like they could do that in front of an entire village.

However, they did agree to compromise with the villagers for them to throw a celebration afterwards.

The girls finished placing flowers in Y/n’s hair and another came up to her with a handful of flowers in her hand serving as a bouquet.

“You look like a princess.” The girl whispered, handing her the bouquet, Y/n smiled.

“Come here, let me tell you a secret.” Y/n motioned for the girl to come close so she could whisper in her ear. “I am a princess.”

The girl turned to look at Y/n with her eyes wide and jaw dropped in shock.

“But you gotta keep that a secret, pinky promise?” Y/n held out her pinky, watching as the girl nodded and wrapped her pinky around Y/n’s.

“Okay, girls! It’s time to leave Y/n alone and help set up the festivities.” Omera announced, the girls began running out of the barn, Omera following them but stopped at the call of her name.

“Thank you,” Y/n said when Omera turned to her. She bowed her head, a smile on her face.

“It’s the least we could do for you and the Mandalorian after you helped us save our village.” She smiled again. “I’ll let him know that you’re ready.”

Omera walked out, leaving Y/n to her own thoughts. She walked up to the window in the barn, leaning against it and watching the villagers prepare for whatever activities they had planned. She still wore her armor as she didn’t bring anything dressy for something like this and she didn’t want to wear one of Omera’s dresses or another villager’s as they’d already done so much for her, Din, and the Child.

“Mesh’la,” She whipped around to face the Mandalorian at the sound of his modulated voice. Her heart felt like it had stopped, and she felt like she forgot how to breathe. She didn’t know why she reacted like this as Din didn’t look any different as he did yesterday, but she still somehow forgot how to function properly as he stepped closer to her.

Little did she know, the Mandalorian was reacting the same way but was able to hide it under the beskar and his movement towards her.

She managed to meet him halfway where no one could see them from the window. Din brushed his knuckles along her cheek, taking in the beauty that stood before him.

“You look so beautiful,” He whispered as one of his fingers moved to touch the petal of one of the many flowers in her hair. “Are you ready?”

“Yes.” Y/n whispered and bit her lip, all of the sudden feeling shy under his gaze. She placed the bouquet on a wooden table they stood beside.

Din’s hand fell away from the flowers in her hair and down to hold both of her hands in his own. They’d discussed a week ago on what vows they’d say and decided on the Mandalorian marriage vows for this first time and then the Ayleenian vows for when they hold a ceremony with her family as Y/n had claimed her brother would want to see her get married. He’d also told her that night what the Mandalorian vows meant in basic and helped her get started on pronouncing the words correctly.

Both of their hearts felt like they were going to beat out of their chest as they starred at each other, hands gripping onto one another.

“Mhi solus tome.” Din began, squeezing Y/n’s hands as she began to repeat the vow.

“Mhi solus tome.”

“Mhi solus dar’tome.”

“Mhi solus dar’tome.”

“Mhi me’dinui an.”

“Mhi me’danui-” Y/n stopped, her eyes looking up, lips moving as she tried to work out the correct pronunciation, and cheeks burning as she did so. Din let out chuckle under his breath, rubbing his thumb across her hand, finding her effort adorable. “Mhi me’dinui an.”

He nodded as a questioning look filled her eyes wondering if she’d said the word correctly. “Mhi ba’juri verde.”

“Mhi ba’juri verde.” She said the last vow, sparkles filling her eyes as he brought her hands up to his helmet. Her breath caught in her throat once again as he flattened her hands out of his helmet and helped her lift it off.

The helmet nearly slipped out of her hands as she gasped and took in Din’s appearance, but he managed to keep a hold on the helmet until he sat it down on the wooden table next to her bouquet of flowers.

Her fingers explored his face, tracing the curve of his nose, the sharp edge of his jaw, and the bow of his upper lip. Then they ran through brown hair, fluffing it up from being pushed down by a helmet all day all while she looked in his brown eyes.

There was a good reason why the breath had been knocked out of her the moment she seen her husband’s, her riduur’s face for the first time and this was it.

“Y/n,” He whispered her name like a prayer on his lips as she continued to take in his features, y/e/c eyes traveling all over his face. Din took off his gloves and held her own face in his hands, seeing it for the first time without the helmet on and a blindfold covering part of her face. “Can I kiss you?”

She nodded her head; her eyes found their way back to his own and closed once he started to lean in. Even though his lips where slightly chapped, they were still soft and she could’ve easily melted then and there as he kissed her, tongue running across her lips while his hands traveled down her body to pull her close to his own.

Y/n broke away for air, gasping it down as his lips made their way down her throat, her fingers threading through his hair so that she had something to keep her steady despite the arm wrapped around her waist.

“As much as-“ Her words were cut off by a whimper that escaped her lips when he moved fabric and nipped at her collarbone. “As much as I would love for this to continue,” She continued to gasp. “We have people waiting on us.”

He nipped at her skin once more before looking up at her, his pupils were blown so wide she had a hard time finding where they ended and his brown irises started. He stood to his full height and she held his gaze while their chest bumped into each other.

“Fine,” He rasped and leaned in to brush his lips along the shell of her ear. “But I’m going to take my time with you tonight and you aren’t going to find it easy to walk afterwards.”

Shivers went down her back and goosebumps covered her skin. “Promise?”

He stepped away from her, took a deep breath, and put his helmet on. His finger curled beneath the Princess’s chin, tilting her head up while he looked down at her.

“I promise.”

The moment the barn door shut, the Mandalorian's helmet was off and he had the Princess, his riduur, pushed up against the door with his knee shoved between her legs while his lips and hands were busy exploring her body.

Omera had agreed to watch the Child so that it was just the two of them for the night and he'd be damned if wasn't going to take full advantage of that.

"Din," Y/n gasped out beneath him when he nipped at that sweet spot between her neck and shoulder. Her fingers threaded through his soft, brown curls, tugging on them in an attempt to keep herself grounded.

Din brought his lips up to her own, tasting the spotchka she'd consumed throughout the celebration on her tongue. He moaned into the kiss at the taste of the liquor while his fingers started fumbling with the knots and clips holding her armor together.

The moment he'd stripped her of her armor, he started working on taking off her clothes but was cut short when she pushed him and rotated their bodies where he was now pushed up against the barn door. She broke away from the kiss, pants escaping her lips, and pupils blown wide with lust as she looked into his brown eyes.

Time seemed to slow as the two of them drank each other in while catching their breaths, it was like the calm before a storm and it was a storm that they both were ready to run into together.

Then it was like time sped back up when Y/n started taking off his armor and every time she sat a piece down she took off, she'd press a kiss to his lips, cheek, jaw, neck, clavicle, and so on. Once all the armor on his upper body was removed, she slid her hand beneath his tunic, lifting it up as her hands travelled further up his abdomen running over the muscle and scars that where mapped across the area. When she got far enough, she lifted the shirt over his head and immediately connected her lips with his own.

Each time they kissed, Din couldn't help but think about how intoxicating her lips were. Today wasn't the first time they'd kissed each other but that first time, he knew he was hooked and every time they've kissed throughout the years he couldn't get enough. But it was something different about tonight, it felt like with every kiss, he was taking a hit of spice, but the high was so much better, and it was a high that he didn't want to come down from.

Y/n broke away from the kiss once again, gasping for the air he stole right out of her, their chest bumping into each other while they gulped down air. Din took this as his chance to grab the bottom of her shirt and lift it over head, his hands running up her body from her hips all away to her breast before lifting the shirt completely off her body. His hands sneaked around her body to unclasp her bra and then the same hands cupped her breast the moment the article of clothing fell away down to their feet. His hands stayed there long enough for his thumbs to brush over her nipples but after that, they are already sliding down her body. They stopped just below her ass and were squeezing the back of her thighs.

"Jump." he whispered, and she did as told, wrapping her legs around his waist. She threw her arms around his neck for leverage and her fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. She leaned in for another kiss and capturing his lips as he started to push away from the door and headed straight for their makeshift cot.

Once he reached the cot, he slowly got down on his knees, one of his hands at her thigh moving up her back to continue holding her close as he gently laid her down, not once breaking the kiss in the process.

Once she was placed on the cot, he slid his hand out from underneath her back and placed it next to her head, bracing himself to keep from crushing her. He finally broke away from the kiss only to trail kisses down her neck and her heaving chest.

Her hands ran through his head of hair, trying to catch her breath while her riduur placed kisses down her body. It didn't take long for her breath to get caught in her throat once again when Din latched his lips around one of her nipples, his eyes looking up at her face and watching the way it morphed from pleasure. He lightly sucked on it and then blew cool air against it once he was done and gave the other nipple the same treatment.

Afterwards, he moved away from her, unhooking her legs from around his waist so he could stand up. A whimper fell from the Princess's lips at the loss of contact.

He started taking the rest of his armor off and when he started unbuckling his pants, he looked down at his riduur laid out before him taking her in. Her lips were swollen from the kisses they shared and her biting her lip, eyes glossy and twinkling with stars, pupils blown wide with lust, and chest still heaving.

In his eyes, she looked like an angel spread out before him and she was all his for the taking.

Once he got the rest of his clothing off, he kneeled back down before her, his hands taking off her boots and then sliding up over the fibric of her pants before stopping at the waistband. Her eyes didn't break contact with his for one moment in the process of his fingers popping open the button of her pants and hooking in the waistband of both her pants and underwear, slowly dragging the articles of clothing down her legs.

It was when he got her fully underdressed that he broke eye contact but only to drag his eyes up and down her body only to meet her eyes again once he leaned down to start dragging his lips up her leg.

A trail of prickles was left in his wake from his lips ghosting over her skin. One of his hands also slid up her leg only to push them further apart so he'd have better access to her. His lips reached the inside of her thigh and begun trailing kisses until they landed on the juncture of her thighs where he lightly nipped at the skin there. He only pulled away from her legs in the slightest to blow cool air across her dripping folds. A moan slipped from Y/n's lips while her hands curled into the blanket that lay below them.

"Look at you," A smirk found its way onto his lips as he watched the way her body was already so responsive to his actions, his words were laced with a teasing edge to them. "You're already soaked, and I've barely gotten started on you."

Y/n looked into his eyes over her heaving chest and couldn't tell where his pupils ended and his iris began due to how dark they were with lust.

And without waiting any longer, Din took his free hand and used it to spread open her folds, flattening his tongue to swipe through them and collecting some of her slick in the process. He pressed his tongue up against her entrance and her back started to arch while she threw her head back. He slipped his other under her leg, resting it on his shoulder while he placed that hand down on her abdominal pelvic region to keep her hips still. He kept his tongue at the same place, prodding at her entrance, the tip of his nose nudged between her folds while the fingers that were once spreading her folds moved to circle around her clit.

A gasp escaped her lips, her body seized up from the pressure his fingers put on the little bundle of nerves, and one of her hands flew down to grip onto his hair. The moan and whimpers falling from her lips was music to his ears as he continued to lap up her arousal and rub on her clit.

"Din," She gasped out, tugging at his hair. "I- I need you."

He pulled his mouth away from her mound, looking up to find her eyes rolling back into her head - she was close. "How do you need me, cyare?"

"I need you inside me." She breathed out, he smirked.

"I know you do, honey." He whispered, pulling his hand away from her clit, and started climbing his way up her body. Her hand fell away from his hair and her chest knocked into his while she gulped down air.

He gently placed a kiss at that spot on her neck that was right below her jaw and ear and then on her jaw, a hand sneaking between their bodies to grab onto his cock. He dragged its tip through her folds, collecting some of the slick between her legs.

"Din," Y/n whined beneath him, hands gripping onto his biceps. He caressed his nose along her cheekbone, quietly shushing her when his lips reach her ear.

"I know." He whispered and lined himself up at her entrance. He started sinking himself into her warmth, a groan erupting from his chest and past his lips from the tight fit while her nails dug into his skin due to the stretch.

Her legs wrapped around his waist bringing him closer to her body once he sunk all the way in. He sat up, looking down at the beginnings of the mess he was making of his riduur and gently took her hands in his and moved them away from his arms. He interlaced his fingers with hers and held her hands down on the cot, looming over her body.

He started slowly rocking his hips into hers getting the two of them used to the way he filled and stretched her before he sped up. He watched the way she bit at her lip, trying to contain the little noises she made, and the way her eyes held so much emotion in them as they looked into his.

"Din," She tightened her legs around his hips and leaned her face up to his as much as she could with her hands pinned down, she held his gaze the entire time and he didn't fail to notice the way something seemed to shift in her eyes. "I need to you to fuck me like you mean it."

Her hips rolled up into his and a growl sipped from his lips at her filthy request. He captured her lips with his own and did as she asked, pulling out far enough that all was left in was the tip and then slamming his hips back into hers.

Y/n pulled away from the kiss, moaning as her head fell back onto the cot, she no longer had the ability to hold herself up as he started his rough and bruising pace. He leaned down, nudging her head to the slide with his nose to allow him access to her neck.

"I keep my promises, you know that right Mrs. Djarin?" He whispered into her ear, but not failing to notice a crease form between her eyebrows and her lips fall open with a moan leaving them out of the corner of his eye. "I intend to follow through with fucking you so hard that it won't be easy for you to walk tomorrow."

At his words, a moan got caught in her throat and her hands squeezed his so hard her nails bit into his skin.

He placed a kiss on her neck, nipping at the spot, and then running his tongue over the mark to soothe the skin. He continued marking her skin up while he untangled his fingers with one of her hands to sneak it down between their bodies to start rubbing at her clit. He felt the rumble of the groan that passed through her throat beneath his lips.

Her hand found its way on his back where she dug her nails into his skin and racked them along his trapezius and stopping at his shoulder giving herself something else to hold onto.

"Princess," He groaned in her ear from the scratches she left on his back. He knew by the way her walls tighten around his cock and her body shook that she was getting close. He sped up the pace of both his hips pounding into her and the circles his fingers drew on her clit. "I need you to cum for me, can you do that?"

"Yes." She panted in his ear, her hand moving to cup the back of his neck, some of her fingers carding through his hair.

"Then do it." He purred, grabbing her earlobe between his teeth.

All it took was one more thrust and a little more pressure on her clit for her to come undone around him. Pants, moans, and whimpers filled his ears while he continued to ride her through her high and chase his own. The warmth that was already settled in his belly began to spread throughout his body due to the sounds she made and the way her walls fluttered around his cock. And just as she was at the end of her high, he reached his own, sinking deep within her and stilling his hips, ropes of cum coating her walls. His arm shook, barely able to hold his body up as waves of ecstasy rolled over him but the attempt to try not to crush his riduur was in vain as she pulled him down to lay against her body.

His head fell in the crook of her neck but neither of them minded as she continued to hold him, her hand rubbing up and down his back in a soothing manner and the other squeezing his hand, grounding him.

They stayed in that position up until Din pulled out and laid down on his back next to Y/n once he caught his breath. He didn't lay there for long though before he got up and started digging through his pants.

"Din?" Y/n asked softly, propping herself up on her elbows to watch him move around. "What are you looking for?" 

He didn't respond to her question but instead hummed in satisfaction once he found what he was looking for and turned to her, clutching the object in his fist. He sat down next to her on the cot, starring down at his closed fist before turning to face his wife.

"I know we didn't exchange anything to physically symbolize our marriage, but I want to give you this." He took her hand in his free one and placed the object in her hand so she could see it. "It’s a mythosaur skull and having it puts you under the protection of Mandalorians as you are now a part of my clan."

She ran a finger over the bumps and ridges of the skull, studying the necklace Din had just gifted her.

"And if there ever comes a time where I'm no longer by your side and you need help, all you have to do is present it to a Mandalorian."

Y/n dragged her gaze away from the skull and looked up at Din, her eyes glossy with unshed tears. "Thank you." 

Before he could say anything, Y/n was throwing her arms around his shoulders and hugging him. He wrapped his arms round her body and pulled her into his lap, snuggling his face in the crook of her neck.

"I love you, riduur." He whispered in her ear, one of his thumbs running back and forth on her back.

"I love you too, riduur."

The Princess hated Tatooine for a reason and it was because every time she was on this damned planet, something bad happened.

Right now was a perfect example of something going haywire on Tatooine as there was currently a blaster barrel digging into her scalp, her hands tied behind her back, her own blood dripping down her face, and a migraine forming from the concussion she received in her fight.

She was napping with the Child in Peli Motto’s docking bay because of the exhaustion the heat brought along with the constant travel when Toro Calican decided to double cross them and come after the Child. She woke up to Calican stumbling over a discarded piece of scrap metal while trying to sneak up on her, a blaster pointed at her.

Despite being woken up from her nap, she was quick to duck behind a desk, the Child in her arms whimpering as blaster fire hitting the chair she was laying in moments ago.

“You’re at a disadvantage right now, I won’t shoot you if you cooperate.” Calican advised, sand and dirt crunching beneath his shoes as he stepped closer to the desk. “I don’t want to harm the Child so let’s not fight and frighten the Child anymore than he already is.”

Y/n didn’t say anything but sat the Child down, looking into his large brown eyes while she held a finger up to her lips before grabbing a pair of knives.

“You say you won’t shoot me, but you shot at where I was moments ago.” She countered his argument, slowly moving out from under the desk while she spoke. She crouched behind the boxes and equipment that sat next to the desk, making her way around the compound to catch him off guard.

“I apologize for that, but your sudden movement startled me. I’m not a fool I know you’re just as deadly as Mando.” Y/n rolled her eyes but didn’t say anything, listening to his steps get closer to the Child.

Knowing that he was getting closer to the Child than she’d like, she knocked down a rusted barrel and quickly moved away from it. Calican let out a noise of shock and shoot in the direction of where she’d just knocked down the barrel.

The Princess moved so that she was behind him. She knew she could easily kill him, but she wanted him alive in order to find out what happened to her riduur.

Y/n lunged for him and took him down to the ground, a yelp of surprise leaving his mouth. She straddled him and sliced at his hand that held the blaster easily getting him to release the weapon. She pushed it away with her hand and then grabbed a handful of his hair, pulling his head back and resting a blade at the expanse of his throat.

“Where is the Mandalorian?” She hissed through gritted teeth, yanking at his hair again.

Calican let out a sound that was in between a hiss and a growl, but before he could say anything a voice cut through the air that was neither of theirs.

“What is going on here?” Y/n snapped her head in the direction of the voice, finding Peli standing in the doorway with her hands on her hips.

That one moment of distraction was all it took for Calican to gain the upper hand. He grabbed her hand that was at his throat and held it steady while he turned his body to throw the Princess off balance and into the floor.

As the Princess’s back slammed on the ground, her head bounced off it, causing her teeth to clash together, black spots to fill her vision, and her ears to ring, not to mention the pain that reverberated throughout her skull. She lost her grip on her blade from the impact and would’ve continued to lay there in a daze if she hadn’t seen a green blob of movement out of the corner of her eye, panic and realization started to settle in chest at the sight of the Child she was supposed to be protecting.

“Peli,” Y/n hissed, struggling with Calican who was trying to pin her down, but she kept her hold on his hair. “Get the Child and run.”

She heard Peli shuffle around the two, the Child cooing when he was picked up. Calican tried to get away from Y/n to go after the Child and mechanic, but Y/n fought through the fogginess that was trying to take over her mind and used what little leverage she had to yank his head back as they escaped.

Calican seemed to have had enough and dug his thumb into the underside of her wrist, she screamed out in pain and let go of his hair. He quickly moved away from her body and stumbled after his blaster.

Y/n was sluggish in her movements to grab a blade and throw one, but she still managed to get it to land in his shoulder, even though that wasn’t where she was aiming for.

Calican screamed in pain but still managed to grab his blaster, when he turned to face the Princess, his face was completely red, teeth bared, and eyes dark with anger and pain.

Before she could react or defend herself, his blaster slammed into the side of her face, and her world went dark.

When she regained consciousness, she was laid down on her side in dirt and had her hands tied behind her back.

“Look who is finally awake!” Calican announced, the higher pitch in his voice caused a ping of sharp pain to knock against her skull. She couldn’t keep the groan of pain from escaping her lips and her body from curling in on itself due to the wave a nausea that crashed through her body.

She didn’t even hear the crunch of sand beneath his boots when Calican walked over to her. What she did notice was the bile that began to raise up her throat when his hand wrapped around her arm and yanked her up in a sitting position.

“Should’ve killed you for that stunt you pulled back there, but I figured the price your brother would be willing to pay for the Princess of Ayleen’s safe return would make up for it.” He hissed, pulling her to feet. “I also figured holding Mando’s little plaything and pet as hostages would get under his skin as well.”

Y/n swallowed the raising bile and glared at the traitor but held onto the sliver of information Calican just gave her, giving her some relief. Din was alive.

“He’s going to kill you and if he doesn’t, so will my brother.” She hissed.

“I’ll take my chances.” He started drugging her up the ramp of the Razor Crest where she spied Peli holding the Child in her arms, a worried and scared look dominating her features. Calican turned Y/n around to face the hanger bay and then placed a hand on her shoulder, roughly pushing her down on her knees.

Y/n heard the Child whimper behind her, and it nearly broke her heart from the sound and that he was witnessing this. She felt like a failure because she wasn’t able to protect the Child properly.

“Give him to me.”  Calican snapped at Peli and took the Child in his arms. Y/n balled her fingers into fist behind her back, the sting from her nails biting into skin was welcomed as she listened to the Child’s cries.

She knew Calican disarmed her while she was unconscious as she no longer felt the comforting weight of her weapons on her body and at that realization, her hope of escaping was dimming. The fact that she had a bad concussion and was dizzy and nauseous because of it didn’t help much in plans of escaping either.

All she could do was sit and wait for Din to get here and part of her wasn’t feeling too good about it.

However, her wait wasn’t long from the faint sound of the rumbling landspeeder engine.

The barrel of Calican’s blaster was shoved into her scalp and as Din entered the compound with a blaster in his hand. Tears prickled in her eyes, but she was quick to push them back, not wanting to show another weakness.

Dispite his helmet being on, his vizor was turned towards her, Calican, and the Child. She could feel him starring at her and she looked away not having the courage to look at him in his helmet as all she felt was shame and failure for not protecting the Child.

“Took you long enough, Mando.” Calican said, his voice cutting through the silence that had settled over the compound. “Looks like I’m calling the shots now. Huh, partner?”

Calican dug his blaster further into her scalp to exaggerate his point. “Drop your blaster and raise ‘em.”

Y/n couldn’t help but watch as Din slowly put his blaster down and held his hand up.

“Cuff him.” Calican said to Peli, she did as told and began walking down the ramp towards him. “You’re a Guild traitor, Mando. And I’m willing to bet that this Child is the target you helped escape.”

Y/n’s heart sank down to the pit of her stomach as Peli cuffed his hands behind his back, hope completely draining from her body and soul. She felt sick again, this time she couldn’t tell if it was from the sight before her or the concussion.

“Fennec was right. Bringing you in won’t just make me a member of the Guild,” She could hear the smugness in his voice and dug her nails further into her palms. “It’ll make me legendary.”

The pressure from the blaster barrel was no longer there on her scalp as Calican waved it around for emphasis.

That ended up being Calican’s grave mistake as Din took that as his chance to throw a flesh change their way.

The flash blinded both Y/n and Calican, but she used that as her chance to get away from Calican. Her attempted escape wasn’t graceful by no means as the world seemed to spin, she ended up rolling down the ramp and landed face first in the sand and dirt despite that not being her goal. A groan left her lips as the sand gritted across her wounds on her cheekbone and eyebrow.

Blaster fire broke out above her, but it was short lived. She turned her head to the side finding Din still standing and relief flooding through her body. She started to find it hard to keep her eyes open and barely heard Din tell Peli to stay back and her ask where the Child is.

Y/n barely registered Din walking up to her and releasing her hands from their bindings.

“Y/n,” Din whispered, gently turn her over to lay on her back. “Hey, look at me.”

His hand cupped her cheek in an attempt to get her eyes to focus on him, which they did but lost focus again as tears welled up in her eyes.

“I’m so sorry.” His arms slid under her back and knees and picked her up to lay against his chest while he carried her up the ship.

He didn’t say anything but shush her apologizes.

“Do you have a med kit?” Peli asked the Mandalorian, carrying the Child in her arms.

“Yes.” He responded, emotion coating his words. He sat her down on a bench within the Razor Crest, leaning her against a wall and crates, the Princess kept her eyes shut the entire time in order to fight the dizziness but it didn’t aid in her fight to stay awake.

Peli continued to hold the Child, who was reaching his arms out towards the Princess, as Din grabbed the med kit and started to clean and dress the wounds on her face.

“Is that it?” Din asked her, looking for any other injuries.

“I have a concussion,” She slurred her words, pressing her head further in the cold metal of the ship. “But yes.”

She heard a sigh escaped the helmet and the rustling of stuff being moved around. Y/n opened her eyes to see what was happening only to find Peli walking towards her, the Child’s arms still stretched out towards her. A small smile found its way on her face seeing that the Child wasn’t harmed.

“Be careful with him.” Peli whispered, setting the Child down in her arms. The Child immediately tried his best attempt to hug Y/n with his tiny arms. “And get to feeling better.”

“Thank you.” Y/n told Peli, who nodded in response before turning towards the Mandalorian.

“So, I take it you didn’t get paid?” Peli asked the Mandalorian.

He sighed, motioned his helmet for Peli to follow him and they walked down the ramp. Y/n occupied herself with giving her attention to the Child and focusing on keeping a hold on him.

It didn’t take long for Din to return with the ramp closing behind him, he sat down a brown bag on the floor (it clattering as he did so) and turned to face Y/n and the Child.

“I’m going to get the ship in lightspeed, will you be okay?” He asked, she nodded in response, he seemed to hesitate for a moment and then. “Do you want me to take the Child so you can rest?”

“I think I can manage.” She whispered, peering up at his helmet. He nodded and then walked off.

When the ship started up and began leaving Tatooine, the guilt started to sit heavy in Y/n’s chest again now that things quieted down.

She sat the Child right down next to her on the bench and brought her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs to keep them in place. She felt stupid, reckless, and irresponsible for thinking that she could take that nap, and everything would be fine. Instead she risked her’s, the Child’s, and Din’s life by doing so. She was here to help Din protect the Child but instead ended up causing more trouble for the man she loved, and the Child that already stole her heart.

Then there was the simple fact that she’d just married Din a week ago and she was already fucking shit up.

Tears prickled her tears and escaped down her cheeks before she could even fight them back, the thought of what her father would do to her right now rearing its ugly head into her mind.

She tried reminding herself that he was dead, and that Din was nothing like him, but she couldn’t help but remember both the physical and mental pain her father would inflict on her for failure and a careless mistake like the one she just made.

She was so far in her head that when Din laid his hand on her shoulder, she didn’t expect it and jumped. He took his hand away from her shoulder when she looked up at him and at first, she thought it was because he was disgusted in himself for touching her to begin with. Instead, she was proven wrong when he picked the Child up, placed him in his pram and shut it. Then he took his helmet off and sat next to her, pulling her into his arms.

“What happened?” He asked quietly, the vibrations of his voice rumbling beneath her head that laid on top of his chest plate.

With tears streaming down her face and her head pounding, she told him everything from her taking a nap all away to her fight with Calican, her capture, and everything that happened before he arrived, the arm he had wrapped around her shoulders tightening even more with every detail.

“I completely understand if you are upset with me because I am with myself for letting my guard down like that. And for that, I am so sorry.” His breath hitched at her words and he was pulling away from her only to hold her face in between his hands so that her eyes would stare into his own to make sure she knew he meant every word he was about to say.

“You should not be the one apologizing, I should be. For I trusted Calican enough to help him get in the Guild and underestimating him in thinking he wasn’t going to try anything. That mistake, my mistake, alone was enough to nearly cost yours and the Child’s lives. I do not blame you for wanting and taking a nap, because that could’ve easily been me.” He paused, his thumb brushing across her uninjured cheekbone. “I love you, Y/n Djarin and I don’t think any less of you or your capabilities before and now.”

Her heart melted at his words and at hearing him attach his last name to her own. Although the action was clumsy on her part, she didn’t think twice when she leaned in and attached her lips to his own.

When the kiss broke, the two just stared at each other and held each other’s faces within their hands.

“You need rest.” Din whispered, watching the way Y/n’s eyes were fighting to stay open. She pulled away from him so he could get up. “Stay here.”

He walked over to the storage space that once upon a time used to serve as his bed and pulled their bedding out. He laid everything out on the floor, trying to make things as comfortable as possible. She’d tried to get up to help him make the bed, but he was quick in facing her, pointing at where she was once sitting, and telling her to sit back down.

At any other time, she would argue with him over it but the longer she was on her feet, the dizzier and more nauseated she became, so she did as told.

She continued to watch as he finished up the bed and then started peeling off his armor before walking over to her and helping her do the same which was more of him doing it for her and not letting her help. Once her armor was off, he started to put his arms under her knees and back before she stopped him.

“Din, I appreciate the effort, but if you pick me up, I fear I’m going to get sick and it’ll be more trouble than its worth.” He looked up at her, taking in her words before nodding and helping her stand and slowly walk to the cot instead.

He helped her lay down and then moved to turn the lights off within the Crest’s cargo haul, the only light being the dim emergency light. He got in bed right next to her afterwards and threw his arm over her waist, pulling her in close. She buried her head into his chest and underneath his chin, his arms enveloping her in warmth and the feeling of safety; the day’s activities finally caught up to her and began pulling her under into the dark world of sleep.

“I love you too, Din Djarin.”

She was out before she could hear his response or tell whether the words actually made it out of her mouth or were understandable.

Translations:

cyar'ika - sweetheart

mesh'la - beautiful

keldabe - head-butt or in other words: foreheads touching

"Mhi solus tome, mhi solus dar'tome, mhi me'dinui an, mhi ba'juri verde"  - "We are one when together, we are one when parted, we will share all, we will raise warriors."

riduur - partner, spose, husband, wife

cyare - beloved, loved, popular

Thank you for reading!!

[purselover2]

Bucky to the Rescue

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Triggers: sharp objects

Warning: NSFW, 18+ Only, Smut

Summary: Bucky comes to your rescue when you forget to buy something at the store.

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Bucky hears you before he sees you. You’re coming down the hallway complaining about forgetting something. When you make it into the living room he sees you’re dressed and making your way to the closet to grab your coat.

“Doll? Whats wrong? Where are you going?” It was late and he didn’t like the thought of you out this time of night.

“Just down to the corner market. I forgot to get razors earlier and I have that presentation tomorrow and I need to shave my legs so I can wear my power suit.” You ramble as you're trying to get both arms in your coat.

“Can’t you use one of mine?” He offers.

You pause for a minute, then reply. “Your out too. I had it down on the list to get both of them and totally forgot to go down that aisle. So I’ll have to go. I won’t be gone long. Promise.” You reach up to kiss him and he stops you from turning away.

“What if there was another way to shave?” He offered.

“What do you mean?” You seriously had thought about all other options and couldn’t come up with one that would work. You could of course wear something different, but you really wanted to wear your new suit.

“Well, it just so happens I have mad knife skills. How about you let me shave your legs with my knife?” He smiled at you as your eyes went wide. He knew that you had a thing for his knives.

“Oh, Well I guess that could work.” You’re trying really hard to not show how excited and nervous you are at the thought. It was no secret how much of a turn on it was for you when Bucky practiced with his knives. Even the sight of him sharpening them and the way the muscles in his arm reacted to the motion of him running the blade across the sharpening stone was hot.

“Okay. So why don’t you go get everything ready, and I’ll make sure my knife is good to go.” He turns and heads towards the room he keeps his gear in.

You stand there for another minute before you realize you haven’t moved. Hurrying down the hallway you stop first in the bedroom and quickly undress and put your robe on. Then you make your way into the bathroom. It was one of the main reasons you moved here. In addition to the shower, there was a huge tub big enough for two. Even Bucky could fit in there with you comfortably. Getting out your shaving cream and some towels you started running the water to fill the tub. It had just finished filing up when the door opened behind you and Bucky came into the room.

“I turned the heat up too so that you wouldn’t get cold.” He went to the table you used to hold your wine and book whenever you were soaking and relaxing and laid down his knife, the sharpening stone and a clean washcloth for cleaning the knife after each pass.

“Ready?” He asked turning towards you.

“Yes.” You replied taking your robe off and hanging it up. You made your way to the tub well aware that Bucky was staring at you. Before you could get in Bucky had you in his arms and was lifting you over the side of the tub helping you sit down.

“Can’t have my best girl doing something dangerous like getting into a bathtub now can I?” He tested you.

You laughed and reached up and grabbed ahold of his dog tags using them to pull him closer to you. “Nope. Can’t have that. Thank you for always taking care of me.”

Kissing you he replies. “Anytime babe. Now I’m going to need you to do exactly what I say. Remember my knife can cut through bone, so I need you to be very very still and let me do the work okay? You just lay back and relax. Okay?”

All you could do was nod your head, lean back and follow instructions.

Bucky took his shirt off and knelt down beside the tub. He lifted your right leg and placed it on his shoulder. Taking the shaving cream he shakes the can and squirts a line of it slowly down the entire length of your leg. Sitting the can down, he slowly lathers it up until your leg is completely coated.

Leaning over he picks up his knife. “Ready doll?” “Yes.” You say along with nodding your head.

“Okay remember what I said. Let me do the work. Just relax.” He placed the knife at the bottom of your leg and slowly moved it upward until he reached your knee. Your entire body was responding to him. If the image of him doing this to you had turned you on, the real thing was about to push you over the edge before you’d even really started.

He repeated the process over and over. Start at the bottom, pull up to your knee, wipe the blade off and repeat until the entire bottom portion of your leg was done.

“How was that baby?” He asked as he ran his hand over the area to make sure he didn’t miss a spot.

“Good. Felt amazing actually.” You answered honestly smiling at him.

“I’m glad. Alright now I need to do your knee. I’ve heard you say its a tricky area to shave, so I’ll be really careful.” You nod and he makes sure your knee is still lathered.

Taking the knife he slowly moves in short flicks working the angles and planes of the area until it's finished.

Then he moves to the upper part of your leg using the same long careful strokes he used on the lower part. Once the right leg is completely done and inspected he lowers it into the water and rinses it off and again checks to make sure he didn’t miss anything.

Once satisfied he moves to the other side of the tub and kneels down. He’s got shaving cream on his shoulder and something about it makes him look even sexier. He takes your left leg and repeats the same process. This time though he stops after the last stroke clears the upper part of the leg and makes no move to lower it into the water.

“Almost done doll. Unless.....” He stops and looks up at you.

“Unless?” You think you know where he’s going with this. At least you and pussy hope you know where.

“Well, I know you have a waxing appointment coming up, but what if I take care of it for you? I’m already down here and have everything set up. Would make more sense and free up some time on your calendar.” He rationalized.

You had almost blacked out when he said the words waxing appointment, you and your pussy celebrating that you had been right. So, it took you a minute to realize he was waiting on a response. “It would save me some time and if you don’t mind.” You were really proud of yourself for being able to string that many words together.

“Don’t mind at all.” How lowered your leg into the water and began cleaning it of any shaving cream and checking for any missed places. This time though when his hand smoothed up the last few inches it slipped and grazed over your lower lips. Your body jerked at the sensation.

“Oops. Sorry ‘bout that.” He grinned letting you know he was anything but sorry. You smiled at him and shook your head.

“Now for this, we’re going to need to change places. I’m going to get in the tub and you're going to sit on the ledge in the corner.” He stands up and picks up his knife. “I’ll be right back, I need to go and get one of my smaller knives for this.”

While he’s gone you get up and grab one of the towels from the rack and put it down on the ledge where you’ll be sitting. The ledge is wide and he’ll be able to spread your legs as far apart as he needs to in order to complete his task. You also let the water out and refill again.

Bucky comes back in, shutting the door behind him and watches as you sit down on the ledge. He unbuckles his belt and pulls his jeans and underwear down in one motion. His cock springs free and you’re glad to see that you aren’t the only one this entire process has been effecting.

“Sorry about that doll, had to find the right one and she needed some care before I could use her on my girl.” He explained as he lowered himself into the tub and moved over to you.

He spread your legs apart and took the can of shaving cream and this time sprayed it into his hand. Sitting the can down, he rubs both hands together working up a lather. Taking it he spreads it all over your pussy and you try to not react when his finger brushes against your clit.

“Okay baby, remember be extra still for me and let me do the work. She gives me so much pleasure I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself I nicked her.” He explains and you nod. “Okay.”

He picks up a much smaller knife, one with a much skinnier, shorter blade. He shaves the area above your clit first using short upward strokes. Cleaning the knife off after each pass, once he’s done, he spreads you further apart. “Alright baby, now I’m going to shave the lips. I’ll have to pull them a little bit so that the blade doesn’t come anywhere near your clit.” He did just that, pulling and maneuvering each one until he could swipe the blade up safely.

Once he was done, he took a cup you didn’t notice before and poured water over your pussy until it was free of any lather. Running his hands over her he checked for missed areas. Finally he took a clean washcloth and patted her dry.

“How does that feel baby?” He asked sitting back in the tub.

“Good.” You replied, noticing that his cock was still hard and laying against his stomach. “But are you sure you didn’t miss anything?”

“I’m pretty sure, but if you’d like I could do a visual inspection. Would have to get real close to her and maybe use my tongue to get into the places my eyes might miss.” He looked down at your pussy at the same time it decided to drench the towel under you.

“I think you better.” You answered as you once again pulled him forward with his dog tags.

“Yes ma’am.” He replied and moved forward, putting your legs over his shoulders. Using his hands he spread you apart taking his thumbs and running them up and down your folds using your wetness to coat his way. Leaning closer he drags his tongue up and down your folds and over your clit, finally stopping on it and giving it a few flicks. “Hmmmmm” you moan. “Bucky...”

“What is it doll?” I think I’m done. Everything looks and feels good. You’re all set.” He teased you, smiling when you made a noise of protest.

“God, Bucky, please don’t stop. Please?” You didn’t care if you were begging. The whole experience had you so worked up that you didn’t care what you sounded like as long as his mouth found its way back.

“Please what?” He said as he once again flicked his tongue over you. “Please make me cum.” You breathed out.

“Well, since you asked so nicely and you’re spread out in front of me like a damn last meal, I’m going to do just that and once I’ve made you cum I’m going to bury myself inside you and make you cum again all over my cock before I fill you up.” He lowered his mouth and just as his tongue started to dart out, he looked back up at you.

“Doll? Anytime you want to forget the razors, I’m okay with that.”

[marvelslut16]

I trust you

Prompt number: 31 “I trust you”

Fandom: Marvel

Paring: Bucky Barnes x reader

Part two to Trust me for once.

Rating: T

Word count: 2.2k

Warnings: Swearing. Mentions blood, violence, and death. A lil angst. 

A/N: I just want to write for Bucky for the rest of fictober, someone stop me please. I don’t know why I love this fic so much, but I do. Maybe it’s my lack of sleep messing with me lmao. I passed 500 followers and I can’t possibly begin to explain how much that means to me and how much I love each and every one of you! When I started my Tumblr last year to write some shitty self indulgent fanfics I never thought anyone would ever read them. I never imagined having 500 people following my shitty blog. 

In the week and a half since Hydra had captured you, Bucky has been spiraling. When he got to the quinjet and turned to look for you, his heart fell into the pit of his stomach when he couldn’t find you. Everything you had said to him in the warehouse started to make more sense, you phrashed things a specific way; ‘so long as it gets you out of here safely.’ He knew you weren’t coming, but he still made Steve keep the quinjet there and wait until it was almost too late and the team was under attack again.

Back at the compound Bucky spends all of his time in his room or down in the gym punching- and breaking- one of the many punching bags, throwing his knives at targets, and working on his shooting. He isn’t sleeping and he isn’t eating, he won’t even talk to Steve when the super soldier tries to get him to talk- whether it be about what happened in the warehouse or anything in general. 

Steve, Sam, and Tony are exhausting every resource they have to find you, Hydra had moved you to another location as soon as the quinjet was out of sight of the base. On the rare occasion Bucky isn’t in the gym or his room, he's hovering over the shoulders of the three men hoping he’ll see something they missed. He doesn’t, and only succeeds in annoying aforementioned men with his brooding stares and silence. 

Bucky has nightmares on a daily basis again, something that his time in Wakanda with Shuri and T’Challa had gotten rid of. The only difference this time is he doesn’t see himself. He sees everything he went through, all the tourture he endured and the innocent bloodshed, but instead of him you’re in his shoes. He watches you get your brain turned into mush in the damn chair. He watches you forgetting everyone- forgetting him- and then going after the Avengers because you don’t know any better. He can never wake up from the nightmares, he’s stuck in them until he watches you die or you kill him. 

Twelve days after you’re taken, Bucky's down in the gym, sitting on a chair because the memories of you in the warehouse are consuming him. You saying that he hates you and to just trust you for once are playing on repeat. How could you think he doesn't trust you?

“I trust you!” he screams into the empty gym, wishing he’d told you so in the warehouse, hurling the knife that was resting in his hand into the wall across from him. He goes to run his hands through his long strands of hair, forgetting he had cut most of it off, something you would refer to as pulling a Britney. He has no idea what that even means, but you say it everytime you or Nat impulsively cut your hair super short. Instead he pushes the palms of his hands into his eyes, trying to push the memories away. “I could never hate you.”

Steve enters the gym quietly, observing his best friend for a few minutes. He’s never seen him this bad before, not even when he was consumed by guilt when he realized all of the innocent lives that were lost by his hands. Steve was aware that Bucky has had feelings for you since he saw you, immediately becoming infatuated with your beauty. His feelings continued to grow when he learned your humor, sarcasm, intelligence, and saw your skill in battle. Steve knew Bucky was intimidated and nervous, not as skilled with the women like he was seventy years ago and that’s why he didn’t talk to you, but Steve never realized that Bucky cared this much. 

“Hey Buck,” Steve finally speaks, causing Bucky to stand up and pretend he wasn’t just having a breakdown. “We’ve got something.”

Bucky doesn’t verbally respond, instead he brushes past Steve and walks out of the gym. Steve quickly leads the way to the lab, filling Bucky in on the new development. Hydra is streaming a live feed of you chained to a chair right to every computer and television screen in the compound. When the two get to the lab, packed with the rest of the Avengers huddling around the same screen, Bucky see’s you for the first time in twelve days. The first time you aren’t a figment of his imagination. You’re bruised and bloody: split lip with dried blood on your chin; dried blood on your forehead from where you must have wiped the blood from the cut on your eyebrow so it didn’t drip into your eyes before you were chained to the chair; you’re left eye black, blue, and bruised; your skin has a yellow hue and your cheeks are hollow from malnutrition. 

Bucky wants to scream, he wants to put a fist through a wall, and he wants to kill whoever laid a hand on you. The Avengers watch quietly as he squeezes through the gaps in the group's huddle so he can be by the screen. By you. You aren’t staring at the camera, instead staring straight in front of you, where he imagines Hydra agents are standing. 

“You don’t want another Winter Soldier,” your voice is the exact opposite of your appearance, it’s still so strong and determined. “You want the Winter Soldier. You wanted us to intercept the messages and show up at the base, it was an ambush.” 

“Very good, Ms. (Y/L/N),” a man speaks off screen, he has a thick Russian accent, but Bucky doesn’t recognize it. “The only problem was that you seemed to figure it out that day, and ruined our plans.”

“Oops?” your sarcasm garners another slap, the ring on the man's hand causing a gash on your cheekbone. “It’s been what, over a week? How long are you gonna keep me?”

“Until Soldat switches places with you,” you let out a loud bark of a laugh that echoes off the walls in the small room. 

“Bucky, your Soldat, he won’t sacrifice himself for me,” you laugh at the man interrogating you.

“We learned of his affections for you-” you cut him off with another laugh. 

“You need to fire whoever told you that,” you can’t stop laughing at the absurdity that came out of the Hydra agents mouth. And you don’t care if he becomes angry and annoyed with you, you’re gonna get killed no matter what. Your eyes quickly flick to the camera set up on your left, the one the Hydra agents thought you hadn’t seen, before continuing knowing the Avengers had to be seeing all of this. “The only affection Bucky has for me is hatred. He hates me, there’s no way he’d switch places for little old me. You should have captured literally anyone else if you wanted him to be upset. He can’t stand me! We can’t even hold a simple conversation, and he always leaves the room when I’m in it. We were only paired up on this mission because of a fluke accident. Face it, you fucked up. I’m worthless to your Soldat.”

“That’s not true!” Bucky feels like he’s yelling it at the screen, but his protest is only a whisper. The rest of the team watches him with sad eyes, he’s looking at you so longingly. Trying to will you to understand how he feels about you through the screen. As if on cue, you glance at the camera again, giving it a sd smile, accepting your fate. A loud ping comes from one of the computers in the lab, but Bucky keeps eye contact with you, even though he knows you can’t see. He doesn’t realize he’s doing it until his flesh hand is pressed against the television.

“We’ve got a location!” Tony yells, already calling for his suit. 

“Then you’re worthless to me!” the hydra agent growls, stopping the team in their tracks who were on their way to change. 

“No,” Bucky pleads, when he hears the safety of a gun clicking off.  

“Any last words for your precious Avengers?” the man asks you, gesturing to the camera, he hadn’t noticed you’d already seen it. 

“I’d say tell my family I love them,” you’re openly talking to the camera now. “But I don’t have any. So thank you for being the family I never had, and the family I always wanted. I love every single one of you.”

A tear slips from your non swollen eye, a matching one rolling down Bucky’s cheek. The screen goes black, a gun goes off, and then the feed cuts completely. “No!” he screams, going to punch a hole in the television, but his fist goes right through due to it being Stark technology. 

“Where are you going?” Steve calls as Bucky heads to exit to the lab, no one else moving, too shocked to register everything that just happened. 

“Let’s go kill those bastards,” is his gruff response, heading towards the hanger with the Quinjet since he’s already dressed in his tactical gear from his time in the gym. 

Steve and Tony are the first ones dressed and ready to go, but the latter hangs back so Steve can talk to his best friend privately. Steve doesn’t say anything when he sits beside the brunette, he doesn’t know where to begin. 

“(Y/N) died thinking I hated her Stevie,” Bucky’s voice breaks. “I kept my distance cause I didn’t want to hurt her. And then I saw her with Sam and I was jealous so I started to ignore her more. I pushed her away because I was scared and jealous. And now she’ll never know that I love her.”

--

A shot rings through the small room you’re stuck in, the bullet lodging into the wall beside your head. You glance at the camera, finding the red light off. Your team, your family thinks you're dead. That was his damn plan, he knows they’ll come to avenge you. 

“Sit tight,” he smirks, the barrel of his gun coming into contact with your skull, effectively knocking you out. 

Your head is heavy and pounding in pain when you finally come to. Outside the door you can hear screams and guns going off at rapid speed. You cringe away from the sound when someone uses their body to break open the door to your room. The sound of familiar footsteps clomping towards you causes you to perk up, it’s Bucky. You can’t open your eyes or even move your head towards the sound to alert him that you’re okay, but you hear a whispered “thank god,” when he hears your steady heartbeat. From the crunching sound you can tell Bucky used his vibranium hand to crush the handcuffs keeping you attached to the chair. 

He picks you up bridal style, holding you close to his warm chest. You involuntarily cuddle into the warmth, causing Bucky to smile lovingly down at you. “I’ve got you now,” he whispers, hand caressing your cheek, careful not to put pressure on your many cuts. 

When you wake up again, you're in the familiar sterile medbay at the compound. A heavy weight is on your hand, looking over you notice it’s Bucky's hands clutching yours, his head tipped back on the seat he’s in.

“He hasn’t left your side,” Sam smirks at the scene from the doorway, holding a falcon stuffed animal. You playfully roll your eyes at the gift, but reach for it with your free hand. Bucky starts to stir, so Sam gives you a kiss on the forehead and heads for the door again. “Tinman’s whipped.”

The first thing you notice when you glance at Bucky again is his hair. He cut it all off when you were gone. As much as you loved his luscious locks and thought he was hot with them, he’s undeniably sexy with the short hairstyle. “You cut your hair,” Bucky immediately wakes up the rest of the way at your voice, ocean blue eyes staring into yours. “It looks good on you.”

“You could have died,” his voice exasperated. “And the first thing you mention is my hair. I’ve been worried sick, (Y/N)!”

“I was fine,” you roll your eyes, trying not to think of just how close to death you came. “I’m fine now.” 

“Next mission I get to call the shots,” he grumbles. “I’m not having the woman I love almost die for me again.”

“I love you too Buck,” you ignore the fact that he didn’t mean for you to hear his confession. “Why else would I be willing to die for you?”

He shoots out of his seat, eyes wide as he stares down at you. You push up to a sitting position, moving to the side of the bed, motioning for Bucky to lay beside you. He seems to debate with himself about whether he should or not, before finally laying down and gently pulling you into his arms. You crane your neck up to look into his eyes, he leans down and your lips meet timidly at first. It quickly turns into a slow loving kiss, the two of you wanting to prolong for as long as you can. You reach a hand up, caressing his face before slipping it through his now short locks.

Permanent tags: @crimson-knuckled-queen​ @rexorangecouny​ @mrs-malfoy-always​

[stuckybarton]

Before You Go [One Shot]

SUMMARY: Ransom Hugh Drysdale has finally done it, his greed had come to bite him in the ass and he was now facing life without parole. Gone was the arrogant trust fund grandson, now a man that had nothing remained. Behind an orange jumpsuit and a lifetime to reflect how his world comes crashing down from his own doing. He has come into terms with his action, but someone comes back in his life to see him before she goes live her life again without him. [Post-Knives Out AU]

WARNING: Slight Profanities(?) Not Beta’d

CHARACTERS: Ransom Drysdale x Future Ex Wife!FOC [unnamed]

WORDS: 1881

A/N: The ending of this is so ugh! i don't like how it ends, but yeah.

Years of knowing one Ransom Drysdale, the years of hating him, loving him, and marrying him. To see him in this predicament was by far the last thing she would have ever believed to would happen to her husband--ex-husband as soon as she could get his signature of the Divorce Papers. This man in a horrible orange jumpsuit and horrible workers boots was not her husband.

"What have you done, Ran?" she questioned finally sitting in front of him.

Ransom and the rest of his family still had a sway in the powers above and here they both sat. Alone, with only three correctional officers watching over them, listening with intrigue as the man had finally had a visitor that he approved of. Sitting in a metal chair that creaked as most of her weight rested on the back, she was led to wonder more about this moment, how could this happen to him, how could he let himself go into the deep end like this.

"What I needed to do." he shrugged, gone was the arrogance in his stance, no longer did he have a snide remark or a comeback. She was left to watch the glory of her lover now turn into ashes. Ransom Drysdale had finally come to accept his fate behind the steel bars.

Her hands clenched as she rested them on her lap, the hard folder that rested on top of it already burning her. This was one of the reasons she came here. To find her closure and live the life he could never give her. The Thrombey-Drysdale Clan were dysfunctional in every sense of the word, in all her years of knowing them and having to interact with them, they were the most vile and cruel family she had ever been associated with. It made her wonder, if that very family was the cause of what came to be known as Ransom, the black sheep that never truly had the love and support of his parents--desperate for money that he forced to make ends meet, even with lives were on the line, his grandfather's life being on the line.

She sighed, eyes skimming the white painted room. The lack of windows and sunlight brought a more harrowing scene before her.

Turning her attention back to her husband, there was this look on his eyes that she has never seen before. The emptiness in his blue hues breaks her heart more than she would ever admit.

Had this been her fault? Was she not strong enough for the two of them and this was what it led to? Ransom thrown into jail and she was empty with the ghost of what could have been. But then again, it had been his own doing why she had to go. She couldn't bare to see him like this, to live a life of a bachelor while she waited at him, stagnation had been the plague that had her leave and never come back.

"You weren't out of the country when there was a Will Reading with the attorney?" He inquired eyes finally landing right back at her. The same blue eyes now turned back to her.

"I left because of money, I wanted nothing out of your Grandfather's money, and having me in the same room as those assholes you call your family would only prove their point." she spat. Why was he questioning something he knew very well the answer to. "I was in California, just got partnered and I'm in the process of moving everything I own cross country." she admits.

"So that's why you're here?" he inquire. "Here to gloat? Tell me once again you've regret marrying as arrogant prick like me."

Taking a deep breath, she counted to ten. A mantra her therapist had said when dealing with Ransom, dealing with him putting words in her mouth. One of the many reasons why they fell apart and constant misery had laid waste in their marriage and in what was left of their relationship.

"I just want to know why you had to do this? Why did it have to come to this? Money wouldn't have been a problem for the two of us. We're set for life, my parents are ready to give the company to us, all they wanted was a grandchild. That was all they ever wanted from the two of us."

The argument that had been constant in their life was her wanting to have child and Ransom being unable to let go of his lavish bachelor lifestyle. They loved each other, she had hoped and prayed that will never stop, but their priorities weren't set straight, more so Ransom. She couldn't allow herself to constantly clean up his messes, deal with his horrible family, and juggle the responsibility thrown at her by her parents for her own future. She just gave in, their relationship became collateral because of it. The fact that he didn't make an effort only proves where their relationship stood.

"So what did you do instead of being my husband?" she inquired. "You slept with countless of women behind my back." The way his eyes finally broke from her own stare made it more evident of the betrayal the man had done to her. "You have proven to my parents over and over again why I don't deserve someone like you."

This wasn't the reason why she was here, but Ransom was making it so hard to control herself, to stop the emotions from spilling out of her resolve. This will be the last time she see him before she moves on with her life. With shaky hands she placed the folder towards him. Eyes finally falling towards his hands that took hold of the document at hand.

"I want a divorce, Ransom. I should have done this years ago, I was just too stupid to think you'd try to make this work."

She watched him read through the papers, each paper cemented what she had tried her best to convince him of. It was never the money.

"You're giving me what Harlan gave you in his inheritance?" Ransom questioned.

She didn't need to be part of the will reading to know the circus that Harlan had made, giving most of his assets to Martha, and a portion of it was given to her. It was no chump change. Blood Like Wine Publishing was under her name, and the harassment she had to endure because of the Thrombey-Drysdale family was not worth it. This was her only solution.

"You think the old man's lawyer would allow that to happen?" he snorts. "He wrote us all off on his will. There are fine prints on them that even I can't be bothered to read anymore."

"I know." she confirmed. "Harlan had stated that if I were to divorce one Hugh Ransom Drysdale, for whatever reason I may have, the Publishing House, and the entirety of his copyright catalogue with return to the rightful owner, to his grandson, no one else."

How the gears were now turning in his head. He has come to realize that everything that he had done was for nothing. The inheritance was still his had he made the right decision all this time. Now here he was, to rot in jail for who knows how long and the stagnation that was to come for the inheritance he was too consumed in taking for himself.

"Why not keep it then?"

"Like I told you, it's never about the money." she sighed turning her attention towards one of the guards, with his head jerking towards his watch, she knew she didn't have much time left. "I gave you everything but as much as I know Harlan's legacy would be in my good hands, if it means having to be forever your wife, I'd rather have nothing that is smeared with your family name anymore."

"You know I did love you."

"Well it wasn't enough for you to keep it in your pants."

"So that's it. Once I sign, it's game over for the two of us?"

Deep breaths. She keep telling herself to take deep, measure breaths. It wasn't worth it to stoop down to his level anymore.

"It's been over for far too long, Ransom. For once, just this once, do this for me. Let me go. I want to be happy, away from you, away from your family, and away from the memory that I can't look at my husband without remembering all of the women I've seen in our home."

That was it, the first line of tears fell from her cheeks and she was a mess. Pleading over and over for him to sign the Divorce papers and the transfer of ownership of the Publishing house to him. In what felt like hours, the sound of pen on paper had overpowered her sob, each line that needed his signature he had signed. The stone face he had could fool no one, not even her. Everything was falling apart for him.

As soon as the folder had closed, he tried leaning towards her, to which she leaned away. She had been tricked by him and his charms countless of times, but this time she will not allow it. She's already done so much, she couldn't see herself wasting it all over again for him. In one swift motion, she had slid the folder away from his hold and taking the pen with her.

She stood, wiping the last remaining tears from her eyes as she tried to compose herself.

"You're free now, Ransom. You've got the money you've always wanted, but you've lost me, you've lost the one last person that had always saw the best in you. I hope you can sleep at night knowing that."

He smirked, the bravado was back. Blue eyes twinkled, but it was far too dim from what he usually had.

"Eat shit, Ex-wife."

She nodded, acceptance finally caving in. This was for the best. For herself and for the life she had made for herself without him in it. Nodding towards the guards, they had now escorted Ransom back to his cell, but he halted just inch from the door.

"Before you go, Babe." he called out. "We could have made it work, if you just fucking saw they weren't anything to me. I never slept with any of them, I didn't even kiss any of them. I always thought I could, break your heart and all that, hoping to make you see that I'm just like what my family said I was."

"And you succeeded, congratulations Ransom. You're even worse that your family for doing this to me."

"I have a different way of loving."

"Yeah well, hope you enjoy the money, Ran. Heard you can bring a few hookers here from time to time. Make the most out of it from me will you."

"Yes Ma'am."

With one last look at her, he followed the guards back to his cell. Leaving her alone with the finality she had always needed in her life. No longer was she chained to him and no longer was she bound to the toxicity of his dysfunctional family. She was free, and that was all she ever wanted.

[your-local-vamp]

Ahhhhh!! It’s my very first story! I’m so excited and nervous at the same time lolol. I had a creepy stalker vamp idea the other day and here we are! I usually write stories with male vamps and female humans, but boi on boi action got the best of me this time. This is also (I think?) the first story that I don’t use actual names for the characters. I actually prefer it like this, it just adds more spookiness! Anyway, I rly hope that someone will read this and enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it! :3

Btw this story contains some explicit themes (knives, blood, stalking, etc) so make sure to check the tags before reading!

Aura

“Sup, bro!”

I can already see my two friends waving and yelling at me from a distance. I haven’t been out much lately, but they happen to be very persuasive. So here I am, running towards them, thinking I’d be late otherwise. I finally reach them, gasping for some needed fresh air. “Dude, why were you even running?” one of them decided to ask.

“I’m-Sorry-Missed-Bus-.“ I can barely breathe, but try to utter some words regardless. “Yeahhhh, whatever you say man. Anyway, you ready to take off?” Air has finally returned to my lungs and breathing seems to go smoother now. I smile at them. “Yes, let’s go.” We continue our way forward, but something makes me look back over my shoulder. Not this again… Nothing’s there, but I can’t help but look anyway. “Hey, are you okay?” My friends have walked back to see why I stopped.

“I-I’m fine. Let’s just go.” I won’t hesitate to walk away from this feeling. The same feeling I’ve been having for a month, if not more. I can’t really explain it. It’s just like some dark aura is around me all the time. But whenever I look back, it’s like it was never there in the first place. I don’t dare tell anyone about it, what if they think I’m insane or something? So, I just forget about it whenever it happens. I will have to do the same now.

*a few days later*

There’s nothing else on TV, so I decided to watch some stupid show. It’s at season 8 and I honestly have no idea what’s happening, but I’m on the verge of falling asleep anyway. My eyes get heavier by the second. I hear a loud sound coming from the kitchen. I instantly get up, any sign of sleepiness now long gone.

While my heart is rapidly beating in my chest, I quietly walk towards the kitchen and prepare for the worst. Ready to throw hands, I jump in the doorway. But there’s nothing there. I could’ve sworn that the sound was like someone was in here with me. I check every single room in the house, but to no avail. No-one seems to be here. I really need to chill down. First the weird feelings, now this. I sigh deeply. I should probably just go to sleep.

*several weeks pass by*

Heavy plastic bag full with groceries in hand, I walk back to my apartment. Grocery shopping is one of the many things I hate in life, but I need to get food one way or another. Thank god my house isn’t that far from the store. I tend to get very hesitant about going outside most of the time, but the aura hasn’t been around at all the past few days. I was a bit confused at first as to why it had stopped so sudden, but I decided to just take it by heart and go on with my life. I’m glad that I don’t have to worry anymore. Ah, I can see my apartment already. I walk a bit faster, being a little too excited about the microwavable instant meal I get to eat when I get there.

Now upstairs, I open the front door and close it behind me. I quickly walk to the kitchen and drop the heavy bag on the counter. Phew, I made it. I quickly put the meal in the microwave, being unable to wait any longer. “Guess I’ll wait for it in the living room.” I say to myself.

“What the fuck?!” Going to the living room was a terrible idea. I nearly got a heart attack, seeing that a complete stranger is sitting down on my couch. Any person in their right mind would probably get out and call for help right now. But I can’t for some reason. It’s like I’m frozen in place. “Quiet it down please, Darling. We don’t wish to alarm anyone, now do we?” the stranger calmly says.

The man still remains seated on my couch. An emotionless expression present on his face. He seems to be around mid twenties, about the same age as me. I can’t help but take an observing look at him. Pitch black hair, the brightest blue eyes, clothed in all-black. His charisma is piercing through the tense atmosphere. He seems to be totally unbothered about his presence here. I, on the other hand, am not so happy about this entire situation.

I’m not sure whether his intentions are good or bad, but I’ve got a funny feeling that he’s not here to drink a cup of coffee with me. I need some kind of protection just in case he decides to attack me. The knife! I remember having left a knife on the counter, after opening the packaging of my food. I’m thinking about what’s the best way to get to the kitchen, never losing eye contact with the stranger during the progress. Alright, just run there, grab it, and be ready to defend yourself.

I take a short sprint towards the kitchen, knife already being in my sight. I reach out to it, but something unexpected happens. The stranger, who was seated in the couch just a second ago, now stands in front of me, holding the only object I’ve got within my reach to protect myself with. “H-How…?” I look at him, being shocked out of my mind. How did he get here so fast? That’s impossible. “Oh, Darling. You disappoint me ever so much.” the stranger sighs. What could possibly disappoint him right now?

“Why are you here.” It’s more of a statement than it is a question. “I get to meet you at last, but you seem to be unhappy about that.” he responds. At last? The gears in my brain finally catch up. It was him. That feeling, the aura. It was him following me all this time. Confusion mixed with a lot of anger take over my body. “Ah, my Darling gets it now. What a beautiful sight this is.” He really needs to get rid of that stupid smile of his, or I’ll wipe it off for him. “Why? Why the fuck have you been stalking me?” I spit. A dangerous glint of anger appears in his eyes. However, I will not back up now. I want answers. “I thought that you were different.” he says, through gritted teeth. “From who?”

“The other humans.” He’s comparing me to other… ‘humans’? “You see, you wanted to grab this knife here. To ‘protect’ yourself, I presume.” He brings the object close to my throat, now obviously dominating me. I gasp when the sharp blade touches my skin ever so slightly. “But not once did you give me a sign that you wanted to grab it. The others always showed that they wanted to make a run for it. How very foolish of them.” he says with a smile. “And you’re disappointed, because…?” My comment carries a lot of sass with it, but at this point I don’t care about the consequences. The stranger didn’t seem to mind, on the contrary, it made him burst out into laughter. “You have asked the two most infamous questions. ‘Why?’ and ‘how?’. It pisses me off.” he says, while still smiling. I seriously can’t read him. He’s exceptionally happy, even though I know that he’s very angry at me.

“You never answered.” I say. The stranger finally drops the knife on the counter, but doesn’t hesitate to take a step closer to me. “This is why I like you. You’re afraid, but trying so hard not to show me.” he says. “Do you have any idea who you’re dealing with?” He grabs my chin in between his thumb and index finger and lifts it up, forcing me to look at him. His eyes, which once were a beautiful blue hue, have now turned into the most spine-chilling dark red. Not to mention, he has now bared his teeth as well, showing me 2 pointy fangs. I’d be lying if I said that he doesn’t look extremely intimidating. “You know, the movies are all wrong. We don’t coexist with you humans. We kill you without mercy.”

“Y-You’re a v-vampire…?” I can’t help but stutter, fear is taking over me at last. “Obviously.” The stranger is glowing with pride. He probably loves scaring his prey like this. “Vampires aren’t real.” The air grows even more tense than it was before, if that’s even possible. “Trust me, Darling. I am very real. I can hurt you in more ways than you can imagine.”

“Then answer me this. Why me?” I really don’t want to piss him off even more now that I know what he’s capable of, but I have to know why. “I wonder why you’re so desperate to have an answer to that question.” I gather up all my courage to respond to him. “Like you said, you can hurt me in many ways. And that’s ultimately what you’re here for, isn’t it? You’re going to kill me. So my last wish is for you to answer me.” It’s quiet for a while. He just looks at me. After what seems like an eternity, he smiles. “I see.” Is all he decides to say. The smile never disappears. I feel like what I said provoked him even more.

“You know, now that I think about it, I have a much more fun idea in mind.” My unpleasant gut feeling seems to have been proven right. “Sorry, Darling. This is going to hurt.” I can’t say or do anything, or he has already taken yet another step towards me. He leans my head back and buries his fangs deep inside my neck. His actions are quick and eager.

I try to get him off me, but his grasp on me is too strong. These powers are definitely something inhuman. “Ngh!” Sounds of pure agony escape my mouth. A huge amount of blood is getting sucked out of my body. I can feel that I’m staring to lose consciousness. I reach for the knife on the counter, but it again fails to protect me. The man violently grabs my wrist to prevent me from harming him, and applies a good amount of pressure to it. I can’t help but drop the knife. It falls on the floor with a loud metal clink. He raises his head and looks at me. His red eyes are clearly visible.

“Tsk. Did you really think that you could do that?” He smirks at me. “You’re not going to get away with this.” He nonchalantly continues sucking my blood. “S-Stop it. P-Please…” I use every last bit of strength I have left to resist him, but soon after, my body gives up. My eyes shut themselves, but I can still feel the stranger lifting me up and exiting my apartment. It doesn’t take long for everything to go dark.

*???*

“…has been missing for 5 months now. He was last seen walking towards his apartment after being at the grocery store. The police has released pictures of blood drops and a knife on the floor in the victim’s apartment. ‘There is an obvious sign of struggle.’ one of the policemen states. They are currently investigating the crime scene and the blood samples are being researched at the laboratory. A highly praised detective is on this case as well. ‘To the people who did this: turn yourselves in, before we have to come find you.’ the detective said during an interview. If you have seen the victim or know someone who has, please call your local police station. Any information about the victim or the culprit is much needed. That was it for today’s news. We’ll be back tomorrow at 8 PM. For now, good evening everyone!”

[heartsofbeskar]

from the ashes

chapter six | read on AO3

din djarin x oc

WARNINGS: violence, swearing

WORDS: 3.2K

EXCERPT: He extended his other arm to her. Stepping as close as she could, she wrapped an arm tightly around his shoulders. The arm he had held out to her now circled her waist, pulling her even closer. She could feel every curve and edge of his armour through her clothes. His helmet turned towards her.

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Ten couldn’t think of a better sound than the Ursa’s engines finally running again. Decidedly less strained than before, she thought. Though that may have just been wishful thinking.

They’d been sequestered on the asteroid for the better part of two standard weeks. The time they’d lost was valuable, but nothing compared to the time they’d lose if the Ursa bailed on them mid-flight.

On the surface, spending time with the Mandalorian was not too much different than spending time alone. He barely spoke unless he was spoken to, and moved around like a ghost, despite the heavy armour. But there was something … imposing about the man. Not threatening, but Ten could feel his presence in a room, sometimes even feel his eyes on her. It wholly unsettled her— not that she’d let him know that.

Much — well actually all — of their conversation in the recent days had centered around where the hell to go next. It was obvious an Imperial conspirator had inside knowledge of the job and that Ten and Mando were the ones working it. They had a list of contacts from Greef Karga who may have information; to seek out those contacts now would surely be suicide, for everyone involved.

“You feel sure about Ronhar Kraz?” Ten asked. The armoured man sat to her right nodded slowly. Kraz was a businessman who specialized in textiles and linen trade between the core and the Outer Rim. Seemingly benign, but he used those same textiles and linen to smuggle weapons during the days of the Empire. For both sides.

“It feels too obvious,” she mused. “Former weapons smuggler turned Imperial double agent. Why even attach your name onto this if so many people in the Outer Rim know you worked with the Empire?”

“You’re assuming a level of intelligence and foresight I don’t often attribute to Imps,” he said.

“That’s the mindset that gets you fucked over eventually,” she said, rolling her eyes.

“Is that what happened to you?”

Ten turned her head sharply, glaring at him. “You should watch that metal mouth or I’ll find something that will bend beskar.”

She heard a short breathy noise she’d come to known as a laugh processed through his modulator.

They’d almost passed through the outer boundary of the asteroid field, so she focused on steering through the last of the rocks. An itch had settled under her skin in the past few days, an urge to go, go, go, escape the confines of this belt they’d found themselves unexpectedly marooned within. As much as she still dreaded getting tangled up in Empire business, she felt that coursing of adrenaline in her veins that had been escaping her for many months now. That thrill of her life being put on the line of her own volition.

That adrenaline spiked again as they were fired on.

—

“Shit!” Ten cursed, the ship veering sharply upon impact. Din reacted on instinct, seat spinning towards the weapons controls he’d made a point of committing to memory. “They must have followed our ion trail to the edge of the belt. Have the fuckers just been waiting here the whole time?”

Another hit struck them, almost sending Din flying into the viewport. As he lurched, his gaze locked on the ships in front of them, before Ten steered them quickly away in an evasive maneuver. The ships pursued. He wasn’t surprised he recognized the ships, but he was surprised that—

“Those are New Republic ships. That’ll be why we weren’t vapourized on sight.” He paused as he attempted to target lock the ships still following close behind. There were too many asteroids lingering in the belt’s gravitational pull for them to jump to hyperspace. He needed to buy time. “Are you wanted?”

Ten didn’t look at him as she pushed their speed, but he could somehow feel her rolling her eyes at him. “No, I’m not an idiot. Even if I was, the Ursa’s totally off register, there’s no way—”

“Torpedo approaching lower left engine exhaust,” he interrupted. Cursing again, she took them as far right as possible — and right towards a large asteroid. Din braced, but she slowed their speed enough to whip them quickly around its circumference. He had to admit she was an impressive pilot.

“Are you wanted?”

“...Yes.”

“Now why am I not surprised by—”

She was cut off by the incoming communication alarm. They exchanged glances before Ten reached forward and set off the acceptance switch.

“Unidentified vessel,” came the drone of a New Republic officer. “Cut your engines immediately and prepare for boarding.”

“And why the hell should we do that?” Ten snapped, taking them through a narrow gap between asteroids. Din rolled his eyes now beneath the helmet.

“You are wanted for the murder of Jula Lars. Cut your engines immediately and prepare to be taken into custody. Failure to comply can result in—”

Ten slammed her hand down on the controls and cut off the channel. Din noticed her other hand tightening on the steering gears, knuckles going white. The scars he knew to be there were barely visible.

“Those fuckers … do you have a target lock on the ships? I’m going to blast them from the fucking sky,” she snapped.

As lightly as he dared, Din placed a hand on her arm that was closest to him. “They’re only doing their job. Obviously the Imps put them on our tail. No one else knew we were there.”

“Oh and you’re now the sudden pacifist?” she turned her head to glare at him. It felt like ice began flowing through his veins.

“We don’t need to help create more victims to the Empire,” he said lowly. Something flashed in her eyes. She kept eye contact with him for as long as she dared before turning forward to continue steering.

“Fine,” was all she said. A pause. More shots volleying around them, missing the ship as it weaved. “Then we need to go to hyperspace. Now.”

“There’s still too many asteroids we could—”

“Then I guess you’re just going to have to trust me, Mandalorian,” she said, and she was already engaging, then ramping their speed and then— rocks flew past them as superliminal speeds as they were catapulted into hyperspace. Din held his breath the entire time, certain they were headed straight for a rock which, at these speeds, would vapourize them for sure.

He let it go when he realized they were clear. Looking beside him, he saw Ten staring at him, her scarred eyebrow raised. “I told you to trust me.”

He scoffed, still feeling on edge. “Set the course for Leotis IV.”

“Aye aye, captain.”

—

Ten landed the Ursa as discreetly as she could, a few kilometres out from the Kraz estate. Thankfully it didn’t seem the New Republic had any insight on where they were going, only where they had been. But there was no guessing how long that would last.

Mando was in the hold, already securing his blaster into his belt. She recognized a couple other models and … something that didn’t look like a blaster at all. Before she could get a longer look his cloak fell over it.

“Kraz’s estate only has minimum security in place. Security cameras, only two from the back, no motion sensors,” she said, opening up the weapons compartment.

“How do you know all this?” Mando asked, entering her field of view. She looked up from where she was sheathing throwing knives. She shrugged at him.

“You hunt people, I hunt information. It’s my business to know my way around prominent figure’s properties.” Reaching up, Ten finally grabbed her blaster from the top shelf it sat on. She knew she could very likely do this without it, but it would probably appease Mando.

“If he is working with the Empire, he may have increased his security since your latest information,” he noted. She nodded as she hung her own cloak around her shoulders.

“At least then it would make for a challenge,” she said, nodding her head towards the door.

They closed the distance from the Ursa on foot so as not to be seen by anyone on the grounds. The tree cover was just enough to hide it from view overhead. Mando seemed to want to take the walk in their usual state of silence, and Ten didn’t complain.

As they walked, Ten admired the foliage that seemed to grow at mostly knee height on this planet. It bloomed undisturbed in the gaps left by the trees, enjoying the unrestricted sunlight. The rays seemed to bounce off the petals which appeared in every colour.

It made her think of Yaim. The trees there had been much denser, and wider. But the air seemed to vibrate in the same way, the wind so delicate Ten could almost close her eyes and imagine it was tender fingers on her cheek.

She reached out, as she would always do when she was a girl, and felt that unwavering presence, its weight bearing down on her bones and her soul alike. But … less heavy than usual, which surprised her.

Finally, they reached the wall which indicated the edge of the property, It wasn’t high, maybe four or five metres by Ten’s estimation. The surface was uneven, and she grabbed a hold of the texture, testing it.

“This should work. If we can scale to the—” She was cut off by a sharp whizzing noise beside her. As she examined the grappling hook connected to his vambrace, she was absolutely sure he was smirking beneath the helmet. “Or we could do it that way.”

He extended his other arm to her. Stepping as close as she could, she wrapped an arm tightly around his shoulders. The arm he had held out to her now circled her waist, pulling her even closer. She could feel every curve and edge of his armour through her clothes. His helmet turned towards her.

“Hold on tight,” was all he said, and then they were rapidly ascending up, up, past the rough stones in the wall, until Mando swung them onto the top, which was thankfully flat. “You can let go now.”

“Right,” she breathed. Shaking her head, she turned towards the building now filling their view. As she’d planned, the route to the wall had taken them close to the back corner of the property. If her information was current, Kraz only had cameras facing his back and front entrances. “You’ve got a scope on that pulse rifle, right? Can you see the cameras on the back wall?”

Swinging the rifle around to rest on his shoulder, he wordlessly aimed at the building. Ten studied his stance from the corner of her eye. His feet were heavy, planted shoulder width apart. He didn’t sway as the wind picked up, a solid beskar statue in the foreign landscape.

Suddenly he fired once, then twice. Ten flinched at the unexpected noise. Finally, he spoke. “The cameras are taken care of.”

“A little warning next time?” Before he could respond, she flung herself from the wall. She braced herself on her hands as she landed, Mando dropping beside her a moment later. She held up a hand.

After a few beats of silence, she nodded at him. “Seems like they haven’t upgraded security after all,” she noted, moving towards the back entrance. As they got closer, she saw that the cameras were indeed demolished by the shots.

“Don’t suppose you know the interior blueprints as well?” Mando asked at her left shoulder.

“No,” she shook her head. “Those are usually harder to get a hold of. But I have been hired by many men like Kraz. They like to keep their personal offices in the back of buildings, it makes them feel safer for some reason. See that window?”

She gestured directly above them, where the largest window on the back facade sat. It was also the only window inset with what appeared to be rare minerals.

“I agree,” Mando said before she could finish. “That’s a good place to start. After you.”

Ten examined the back entrance, gliding her hand along the smooth edges of the metal. The locking mechanism blinked orange gently, and she recognized an optical scanner. But beneath that … a keyboard override, hidden under an unlocked panel. Perfect.

Taking one of her daggers from her belt, she was able to tear off the cover of the keypad box with her hands. Ten held the dagger up. It was one of her favourites. The handle was nondescript, simple, fitted perfectly to her grip. Its blade was stronger than any other she owned, and she strongly suspected it had been mixed with beskar, though she couldn’t be sure. Maybe she would ask the Mandalorian.

She pried under the edge of the keypad, battling metal on metal, leveraging with all her strength. Finally, as she expected, her metal won, and the bottom edge of the keypad popped off with a satisfying crack. She cut every wire she found lying underneath, one by one until—

The door slid open with a whirr as the orange light went dark.

“Would’ve been faster to shoot it open,” said Mando.

“And set off every alarm they have in this place.” She strode past him into the building. The cement walls echoed her footsteps, but there was no other sound bouncing off them. The overhead lights flickered slowly.

The hallway branched into a T shortly ahead of them, and her and Mando took to a side of the wall. Nodding, they inched over the corner, blasters drawn. Ten found a long corridor on her side, ending in a window. There were no doors. She spoke first, in a low tone.

“All clear here.”

“Here too.”

Relaxing marginally, she turned. The other direction appeared much the same, with another doorless hallway. Ten shrugged.

“Your choice is as good as mine.”

Mando wordlessly started down the hall to the right. She followed, pulling her hood over her head as she did. She ran her hand lightly along the wall. It was cold to the touch. She tightened her grip on her blaster.

A stairway emerged at the end of the hallway, and they followed silently. The next level was similar to the first, though featured more hallways going deeper into the building and an occasional linen draped on the wall. Finally, they came to a wide door, inlaid with the same mineral as the exterior window.

It was empty inside. A large wooden desk occupied much of the room, facing towards the ornate window. The sunlight streamed in freely, casting multicoloured shapes over the room. It reflected off Mando’s beskar as he approached the computer terminal on the desk.

“The communications log should give us enough information on whether he’s working with the Empire.” He called up a projected screen, gloved fingers running over the controls. “Should be … here. Most people don’t even restrict access. We can download it to look at on the ship.”

Ten nodded. She moved towards the window. Closer to it, she could see the small bubbles enclosed in the inlays. It felt rough. She wasn’t sure why she was so drawn to touch today, but it felt as if a live wire had been inserted beneath her skin, the smallest of currents lighting her nerves.

“Done,” came Mando’s modulated tone, pulling her attention. “We should go—”

Before he could finish, the latch clicked in the door. They both watched, unable to do anything, as the handle turned and the door opened fully.

A human man stood there, looking down at his holopad at first. Mando raised his blaster slowly. By the time the man looked up, it was directly in front of his face, and his eyes widened as he took the two of them in.

“W-who the hell are you?” he asked shakily. “You shouldn’t be in here, I …”

“We’re going to walk out of here,” Mando said calmly. “There’s no reason to panic. You’re going to stay in this office for five minutes, and then go about your day. Got it?”

The man’s eyes darted rapidly back and forth between them. Ten tried to soften her eyes, to urge him to listen. She wasn’t sure it worked.

Faster than either of them could react, he screamed out, tripping backwards over himself out of the office. Mando fired down into his leg and he collapsed, screaming more, but it was too late, the damage had been done.

As they sprinted out and away from the office, Ten could already hear the sound of boots echoing off the walls. They’d almost reached the stairs when a group of armed security burst out of a hallway in front of them. It was six on two and damn if Ten didn’t like those odds.

Blaster fire broke out almost immediately. Just as quickly, Ten lost track of Mando in the shuffle, but it didn’t matter.

She shot at the two men in front of her, electing for quantity over quality in her aim. She managed to hit one somewhere in the torso and he crumpled to the ground. After a number of other shots she hit the next man in the shoulder, which worked to her advantage. He dropped his blaster with a shout, but stayed on his feet.

Ten pulled two of the small knives from her belt. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she aimed before whipping it forehead. It spun in the air before hitting its mark, buried inside the man’s neck. He sputtered as he fell to his knees, then onto his face.

Spinning around, she saw Mando taking down a fifth officer behind her, two others already on the ground. She counted quickly.

“Where’s the sixth one?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Mando grunted, dropping the officer to the ground. He raced toward the stairs and she followed.

It appeared they were mostly in the clear, the branch off to the door just ahead of them. Ten led ahead, turning the corner first.

She was met with a blaster pressed to her forehead. It was the sixth officer, her hands shaking as she pressed the barrel harder into the skin.

Ten couldn’t even consciously control her response. It didn’t matter that Mando stood just behind her.

Her hand reached up in front of her, gripping seemingly around nothing, pushing forward. She pulled on the invisible field which was always with her, calling on it. Slowly the barrel of the blaster moved away and so too did the officer, beginning to cough and sputter as her windpipe closed. Ten panted, squeezing tighter and higher, and now the officer was a good three metres in front of her, feet lifting off the ground, eyes rolling into her head. With a grunt, she quickly jerked her arm to the side, sending the officer flying into the wall. The crumpled figure on the ground didn’t move.

“You just …” came Mando’s voice behind her. She turned to look back at him. “You’re a Jedi.”

“We don’t have time for this but let’s get one thing straight. I am not a Jedi.”

[heliads]

Chapter 3: Infiltration

Bucky Barnes is constantly haunted by his past, but the memories of his days as a Winter Soldier will come into a new light in the form of the Watching Hawk, his old HYDRA partner. Will he be able to trust her, and will she be able to move on from his mistakes?

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They’re leaning over the table together, studying the files on the HYDRA base. Bucky still can’t believe that Y/N agreed to work with them- by doing so, she’d be turning her back on HYDRA forever. He knows how it feels to accept HYDRA as your enemy, and so his respect for Y/N grows even more.

Speaking of which, Y/N is a great asset in terms of planning the infiltration of HYDRA. She’s telling the group key details about the HYDRA complex that not even S.H.I.E.L.D.’s files have in store. Bucky was, admittedly, more than a little hesitant to trust Y/N at first, but she’s now proved herself a trustworthy ally. 

Once the planning session is done, Bucky makes his way to the training center. The infiltration of the HYDRA base won’t take place for another week, so he wants to distract himself by exercising. The sound of his fists hitting the punching bag is music to his ears, and Bucky finds himself so caught up in the repetition of the drill that he doesn’t hear the door opening.

“Quite the practice you’ve got going on. Are you trying to kill the punching bag or just dismember it?” Y/N’s voice cuts across the training room, and Bucky stops his restless blows to dry the sweat from his brow and turn to look at her. She’s leaning on a railing by the door, smiling teasingly down at him. She’s also dressed in workout gear, and starts to make her way towards him. “Just trying to practice.” Bucky mutters, grabbing a drink of water.

“What do you say we practice together? One-on-one, just like the old days. I won’t use my wings, you won’t use your knives. Just two soldiers fighting like usual.” Bucky can’t help the reluctant smile creeping across his face. “Let’s go.”

Y/N steps onto the mat across from him, and the two fighters circle each other warily. Bucky is brought back to years long gone, when they were training in the HYDRA facilities. This time, there are no armed guards or cunning operatives to watch them, but Bucky still feels the tension creeping up his spine. He attacks first- he always did- with a punch to her jaw. Y/N dodges it easily- she always did- and retaliates with two jabs to his abdomen in quick succession. Bucky simply kicks her legs out from under her, pinning her to the ground. He doesn’t realize the fist of his metal arm is in the air again, ready to strike, until he sees the worry in her eyes. Bucky blinks, taking in the situation. She’s already pinned. No need to hit again. 

Bucky quickly gets off of the ground, releasing Y/N and taking a few steps back. He struggles to clear his head, but all Bucky can see is the same training ground. 

‘Hit her again.’ Bucky looks up at the uniformed operative, but says nothing. Soldiers say nothing unless asked. The Hawk is on the ground, clawing at the metal arm pinning her by her throat. ‘Hit her again. You should only stop if she’s unconscious.’ At the sound of the operative’s command, the Hawk flings her legs up and over Bucky’s head, pushing him back. She manages to release his grip, but Bucky just pins her again. The Hawk has only been with HYDRA for a short while. She needs to learn. The operative repeats his command again and again. When the operative stops speaking, Bucky stares at the blood coating his hand. The Hawk is motionless on the ground. Bucky is dragged back to his cell.

“Barnes. Barnes!” He can hear a voice from somewhere in the distance. It feels like Bucky’s drowning, too far under to swim and only sinking further from the voice. As the sound of the voice grows louder, Bucky does his best to claw his way to the surface. There’s the sensation of a hand on his arm, pulling him up from the depths of his tortured mind.

“Barnes!” There’s a face in front of him. The Hawk’s- no, Y/N’s. Her hand is on his shoulder, and she’s planted herself in front of him. There’s worry in her eyes, worry he hasn’t seen in a long time. Since before he left her side. “Can you hear me?”

Bucky nods slowly. “What-what happened?” Y/N shakes her head confusedly. “I don’t know. We were fighting, and then you got this emotionless look in your eyes, like you were still the Winter Soldier. It was like you were still under their control.” Bucky sighs, running a hand desperately through his hair to clear his ragged thoughts. “It was when we were fighting. I had a memory of when we first started to train. It was like I was there, and I was forced to keep fighting you even though you were pinned. For a while, I thought I was still there.”

Y/N’s eyes clear, and she tilts her head back. “The fight triggered the memory. Come, sit down.” She leads him to a bench, gentle in her movements lest she bring him back to the fighting ground at HYDRA. Her arm around him feels like the only solid thing in the world. “I’m not surprised it happened. You’re not undergoing the constant memory wipes, so your memories will start returning. The issue is, most of them will be dark and torturous, and you will have to bear them once more.” Bucky slowly lifts his head to face her. “Why are you doing this? Why are you helping me?” Y/N drops her eyes away for just a second, as if asking herself the same questions, but looks back to him once more.

“We are both survivors. When we were still at HYDRA, you helped me live with what I’d done. That’s one consequence of keeping your memories- every second of the day I am left to face the blood on my hands. There were some days I thought I would drown in it, but you helped pull me out. When you left, the HYDRA higher-ups knew I would try to follow you, so they did everything in their power to stop me from returning to your side. I wasn’t- I’m still not sure how to apologize, but this is the only way I know. Kindness begets kindness, and I have no way to repay you for all the times you taught me to heal.”

Bucky nods slowly. “I still can’t remember everything from that time. Some days, I’m glad of it, but most days I just wish I had more memories. There are gaping holes in my mind, and I have nothing with which to fill them.”

Y/N lets his words sink in. Suddenly, she turns to him, as if she’s been fighting back a question but can’t help asking it. “How did it feel to have the mind control lifted from your head?  To know you were your own person once again?” Bucky can’t help a small, slightly sad laugh. “I didn’t quite know what to make of it. I thought I’d feel free, like I finally had control over my own life, but it just felt more empty. Maybe it was my own mind once more, but it had been someone else’s for so long that I didn’t know what I should feel like once it wasn’t.”

Y/N nods at that. Quietly, she leans her head on his shoulder. Bucky is flung back into memories once more, but they come slowly and they are finally pleasant. After the two of them returned from missions, they would often stay like this. The reassurance of another’s heartbeat was always enough to stave off whatever demons lurked in the corners of their minds.

Before Bucky knows it, it’s time to break into the HYDRA base. He’s been tense all morning, but surprisingly, his nerves clear once the building comes in sight. He supposes it’s an old habit, that being afraid was simply a habit broken when he was with HYDRA, but he’s glad of it now. Bucky allows himself to fall into the motions, distancing himself emotionally from the upcoming attack. 

The five of them will split up to enter the building. Natasha, Sam, and Steve will enter from a side door. Bucky and Y/N will take an entrance on the other side of the building. There are guards stationed outside, of course, but they are taken down easily by the two Winter Soldiers. Bucky finds odd comfort in fighting alongside Y/N- they move seamlessly together as if they had forever been by each other’s side. 

Once inside the building, Y/N rushes over to a control panel, shutting down alarm systems and security cameras. Natasha, Sam, and Steve radio in to confirm their entry, so Y/N and Bucky quickly move on to the center of the building. Most of the files will be in the central communications area, so that becomes their target destination. Although Bucky and Y/N have to take out the occasional guard, they are grateful that most of the HYDRA occupants are out at a conference. Finally, Bucky and Y/N are only a few halls away from the destination of the communications center, but that’s where their luck runs out.

Once they round a corner, Bucky quickly motions for Y/N to get back. The halls are filled with guards, who are stationed in tight formations. Bucky looks over at Y/N, suddenly feeling the pressure of the mission. “There are two many guards. I don’t know if we can get past them.” Oddly enough, Y/N doesn’t look worried. In fact, she looks almost regretful. “What is it?” Bucky asks, but Y/N just shakes her head sadly. “He’s here.” She says to her earpiece, and Bucky can hear the sound of many footsteps converging on their location.

Bucky stares at Y/N in betrayal. “What are you doing?” He hisses, and pain fills her eyes. “I’ve always had the illusion of free will. There will always be HYDRA protocols burned into my mind that I cannot break.” The guards finally reach the former allies, too many for Bucky to fight. As he is forced to his knees, restraints tied tightly around his wrists and arms, Y/N speaks one last time, almost too quietly for him to hear. “I wish I could make different choices. I wish it more than anything. But I will always be HYDRA’s puppet.” She walks away briskly towards another operative, leaving Bucky stunned and in the company of dozens of guards.

The HYDRA soldiers eventually lead Bucky to a cell deep within the complex. He is tethered to a chair, arms and legs restrained with heavy-duty bonds. He doesn’t think he could break them even if he tried. A while after that, Bucky is informed that Natasha, Sam, and Steve have also been captured. After the operatives leave, Bucky is alone with the realization of Y/N’s betrayal. Had she meant anything she had said to him? Bucky remembers the look in Y/N’s eyes when the soldiers arrived, as if she truly hated herself for what she’d done. I will always be HYDRA’s puppet. Bucky doesn’t know whether Y/N truly regretted betraying him or not, just that the pain of her turning against him feels as if it’s almost too much to bear.

tag list: @soleil-dor​

[fruityutas]

the devil wears prada

mafia!lee taeyong x female!reader

lowercase intended

!this story is a work of fiction and the characters used in it are in NO WAY like this in real life!

genre: thriller, fluff if you squint hard enough, ANGST

p.1/?

summary: lee taeyong is a cold-blooded mafia leader, not meant to give or receive love. what happens when an innocent by-stander turns out to be the most beautiful woman he’s laid eyes on? 

✰ warnings: cursing, blood, murder, descriptions of wounds (man does taking nursing classes help with that lmao), violence

—————————————————————

taeyong was an enigma to the world. hell, even in the mafia he confused many. he was arguably one of the best leaders out there. many feared him and his men. the tactics used by his team terrified even the toughest of mafiosos. 

 “do you want us to dispose of the body or?” the sentence johnny had asked snapped taeyong out of his trancelike state. 

 “hm, no. let them see what will happen if they try any other funny shit, the bastards really thought their new recruit could do a mission of that significance? idiots.” johnny chuckled and turned away from taeyong, a smirk overlaying his features. 

 “anything for you, tae.” as johnny walked out, taeyong thought of all the different instances where his men’s loyalty had been tested, and every single time johnny had been one of the only ones to stay by his side. he smiled to himself and left his office, ready for the next mission. he walked out into the grand room where a few of his closest men already lingered, talking amongst themselves.

 “cmon, they were already going to die, i helped them out in all honesty.” 

 “donghyuk, how in the hell is slitting someone’s throat helping them?” taeyong rolled his eyes at the two younger’s antics. 

 “will you two be quiet? youre giving me a headache. and mark?”

 “yes, boss?” “donghyuk has a point, he wouldve suffered a much greater fate if not for him.” mark stutters and bows to taeyong, apologizing. taeyong pats him on the shoulder reassuring him he was being light-hearted with the comment. he walks away from the two boys and over to yuta and jaehyun, his two close-range shooters.

 “so who’s coming with me tonight?” they both look at him and shrug. taeyong thinks for a second before deciding on jaehyun. yuta had a bad week and needing a small break. 

 “nevermind that, jaehyun will come. yuta, you need rest, ok?” yuta nods and offers the leader a slice of cheese. taeyong looks at him questioningly and takes it. he and jaehyun walk off shrugging.

 “so whats the plan tonight, tae?” taeyong stops and turns to his companion.

 “well, johnny is stationed at the door while you and mark go in first. kill anyone you see and scope out for any other outlying threats. then you’re going to go to the main room in the building and search for the target, don’t kill them, this is actually a rescue mission. i’ll have taeil and doyoung in the van watching the security cameras. once you find the target get him free but dont let him get away from you, we need him alive. bring him back to the van, taeil will know where to go. once you and mark get to the second location, i will already be there along with jungwoo and donghyuk. we will take it from there and you can head back here after that. simple enough?”

 “of course, but who needs them rescued?” 

 “im not sure exactly who, but some ceo needs him alive apparently.” jaehyun shrugs and continues walking towards the basement, where all things field related are. guns, knives, bombs, armor, you name it and it’s down there. the team for tonights mission all get ready in their required gear and pile into two vans, taking off into the quiet night. 

walking in this neighborhood was a terrible idea. you were shivering from the cold and every sound around you had your senses heightened and on alert. ‘what a shitty night’ your thoughts momentarily clouded your mind and you failed to notice the scene in front of you. three men came out of one of the many abandoned buildings around here, but why was one tied to a chair? you look up to see one of the men pointing at you and looking worried. your walking starts to get uneasy as you get closer. the other man throws the hostage into a van and then turns to you. you’re close enough to hear them speaking. 

 “what the fuck are we gonna do? we cant let her leave.”

 “i dont know, mark, lemme figure it out. maybe she didn’t see.” your face gives yourself away, the taller one rolls his eyes and groans. he starts towards you, the other looking uncomfortable. you stumble and start to back up.

 “um can i help you?”

 “yea can you help us with something real quick? we need a third person for it.” you hesitated but slowly start to walk over to the van.

 “so uh what do you need help wi-AH, WHAT THE FUCK?” the taller man pushes you in beside the one still tied to a chair and shits the door harshly. you get up and try to open it but theres no handles.

 “shit shit shit, holy shit what am i gonna do?” the man in the chair chuckles and wheezes. 

 “so what do they want you for? interference? or maybe you’re one of them too.” you turn to look at the man.

 “what are you talking about?” he scoffs and turns his head away from you.

 “hmm let’s hope your death wont be as grueling as mine, huh?” you swallow a lump that had formed in your throat.

 “what do you mean death? they’re trying to kill us?”

 “well sweetheart, im a contract so yeah, but you- you just ran into some shitty luck huh? these are your last moments if im being honest. no one comes out after being taken by nct.” your heart rate had skyrocketed. 

 “who is nct? why am i going to die i didnt see anything of importance. i just saw those two up there ask me for help.” he tsks and smirks. 

 “thats too late now, your already in this van being taken to the second location, and thats where the boss is- taeyong -he aint a nice guy you know, i would be praying for just a simple gun to the head at this point.” your face pales and the tears start falling. why did you have to choose that shitty side of town to go through? now look what happened, you’re being kidnapped by some organization that kills people for nothing. you curl into a ball into the corner and fall asleep thinking of everything you’re not going to get to achieve. 

the van’s door slides open and moonlight streams in, illuminating you and the man still strapped to the chair. you pull your head from your knees and push yourself farther into the corner, praying they would have forgotten you. the man that shoved you in peeks his head in and looks for you. his eyes land on you and you stay put. his face quirks before he reaches in to drag you out. you put up a hefty fight, punching and screaming at him.

 “you bastard, put me down or so help me-“

 “i think its best if you shut the hell up.” you scoff at his words and still attempt to wriggle yourself from his grasp. he pinches your arm and you finally just fall limp, giving into your fate.

 “what are we going to do with her? taeyong is already in there finishing up.” your captor said cooly to the smaller man.

 “just wait until he finishes, he’ll want to know we have her.” he sighs and walks towards a different van than what you arrived in, opening the back doors before turning back around. the man holding you starts walking towards it and sets you in it.

 “ya’know you made this whole thing hard for us? usually if a person sees something like what was happening they turn away and leave.” you scoff,

 “i already told you i didn’t see anything.” he smirks and turns away laughing.

 “i’m not dumb, i saw you before you even saw us. so what were you doing on that side of town so late at night?” you refused to reply. 

 “mark can you see if taeyong is almost done? i’m getting tired of watching this girl, she’s such a brat.” he turned back towards you and got closer.

 “am i gonna have to repeat myself? i require answers when i ask something.” you rolled your eyes and look away. before you can blink he’s grabbing your hair and yanking you closer to his face.

 “i dont like attitudes, brat. its like you want me to hurt you.” your eyes turn to saucers and you whimper out,

 “i- i was staying and studying late, i’m, i’m not supposed to be here please let me go! i wont tell anyone i dont even care i just want to go home!” he scoffs and hangs his head before looking back at you. a new voice makes its way to your ears.

 “i’m afraid i can’t let you go, sweetheart.” 

[imagine-loki]

Pride and Prejudice

TITLE: Pride and Prejudice CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 54 AUTHOR: wolfpawn

ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine Loki was raised on Jotunheim as Laufey’s son after the war, but an agreement was then made that he would wed Odin’s daughter so Odin could secure the alliance of Jotunheim through the marriage. Loki, in turn, was raised to be king of Jotunheim, but how he views Asgard is far different from how Odin’s daughter is raised leading to a clash of cultures as well as uncertainty between the pair of betrothed youths.     RATING: Mature   NOTES/WARNINGS: Forced Marriage, not all fun and games. My first real step back into the Loki scene in over a year.

I had a chapter ready for this but it just did not make sense in the overall story so I had to rewrite it. I apologise for the delay.

The amount of comments I have received this week have really fed my inspiration to get my ass in gear and write. Thank you for them. The more I get, the more I love to write.

Tags - @skulliebythesea @asimovethroughthisworld @blackcherry26-blog @we-shadowhunter2901

Loki and Ella smiled politely as person after person walked towards them. All through it, Ella whispered the names of those who were coming towards them to ensure there was no chance of the Jotnar making a mistake and embarrassing themselves. 

Her parents watched silently as their daughter and her husband dealt with the newcomers and different realms peoples. “They seem so alike.” Odin frowned at his wife’s words and looked at her. “They are like two dancers, working with one another in a peculiar melody. Look how Ella uses her seidr to speak with him, telling him who everyone is. Sh starts the conversation to make him feel comfortable, then he takes over. The care he is taking of her, look at how he checks on her.” Frigga studied the pair. “They have grown as beings. He cares for her now.”

���He has changed.” Odin acknowledged. “When I was last here, when our daughter nearly died, he looked like he would rather walk on fiery coals than stand near her.” “Now he seems to wish to be in her company and nowhere else.” Frigga watched as Loki beamed and indicated to Ella’s stomach, which was, much to Frigga’s dislike, being shown very obviously to be carrying a child. In Asgard and Vanaheim, women did not declare their pregnancy, they simply kept dressing as they did before but with slightly bigger shawls to cover them. Their hair was tied back off their faces, declaring their marital status but her daughter wore tighter more revealing dresses and her hair loose. She disapproved entirely of it all but seeing the Jotnar women, especially those who they were told were carrying children, they seemed to declare their conditions proudly. It was peculiar to her but seeing it to be commonplace, as a royal who visited many realms, she knew better than to comment on the cultures of other realms. She thought Ella would not be overly comfortable in such a situation, but looking at her daughter, it was clear she was entirely at ease with everything. 

“If only it was like this from the beginning,” Odin sighed. 

“They needed to learn who they are first. Together, they are growing.” Frigga smiled slightly. “We went through something similar, if you recall?” “I did not almost kill you.” Odin pointed out. “I did everything I could to make you feel at home. I ensured you had company when I could not be with you and I most certainly did not make you feel as though your mind was in such a dark place that it had your seidr trying to fight it only to have it fight your very existence.” 

“Ella is not like any other, Odin. Her seidr is so strong. None other would have been so affected.” “That is not a valid argument for this and well you know it,” Odin growled. “Her seidr being so strong is all the more reason to be more careful of her.” “I know you want to keep her safe, but I fear that you forget, she is not the small little girl that loved sitting on your lap learning to play Tafl anymore.” Frigga pointed out. Odin grunted in annoyance as his response. “Is that what it is? That she has grown up? Is it making you feel old?” “Says she who was not entirely pleased to hear she is a grandmother because she thinks it makes her sound old?” Odin scoffed. “I am not angry she has left home. I prepared myself for such from the day Eir stated she was a girl, but everything that she has been through, everything we all have been through, and for to be so strong and for that to happen. She was born too early, her sickness, that attack on Svartalfheim…” “You will never forgive yourself for that, will you?” Frigga sighed, shaking her head. “You need to cease being so concerned about something that happened centuries ago.” “She pleaded to be trained and I dismissed it. ‘What reason would she have to know such things’ I said. She would never need it. If she had not been so proficient with her abilities with seidr, she would have been sliced apart. If she had not learnt spells to heal others, she would have died. I would have had to light my daughter’s funeral pyre. When she got ill as a child, I swore to protect her but I failed her and with him...I will never forgive myself, or him for that.” Odin shook slightly, remember the day he came to Jotunheim when Ella was so ill. “She has.” “She is a better being than I am, we established that years ago.” Odin growled. “I don’t want to hold it against him. He is, after all, young and the new leader of a realm we are closely tied to. The father of my grandchild but for what he did to her, even if I live a hundred thousand more years, I will not be able to forget.” 

Frigga rubbed his arm soothingly. “We can continue to remember but we must also let go of the anger, we do not wish for it to consume us.”

Odin sighed. “Seeing the manner in which they look at one another now, the manner in which they reference that child. I find myself being reminded that my opinion on the matter is not relevant in most ways. I am only sorry that our grandson will be raised on another realm and not with us. Hopefully, Thor may see sense some day and settle down, be as levelheaded as Ella. Ever since we told her of the life she was to have, she accepted it.” He paused for a moment. “It will be interesting if she ever has a daughter.” “She is still carrying one child and you are thinking of her carrying another? What allegiance are you planning?" 

“If you think that he will allow any allegiances to take place by such means, I fear you are entirely mistaken.” Odin scoffed. “Any granddaughter she gives us will not be used in such a manner. I am merely intrigued to see how they would consider dealing with any who suggest it.” Odin’s chuckle at the thought of Ella tearing some poor being asunder was cut short as he watched someone come close to his daughter and her husband in a manner he thought untrustworthy. 

“Odin?” Frigga noted the change in her husband’s demeanour. Odin simply waved his hand slightly to tell her not to distract him as he focused on the being walking towards them. When Frigga looked to where his eye was focused, she sighed. “Oh, Norns, what is he doing here?”

Odin recalled when Thor informed them of what happened at Ostara on Vanaheim, his jaw clenching as he did so. 

* When Ella noted who was coming towards them, she groaned internally. 

Immediately, Loki noticed her apprehension, so he looked for the cause of it by following her line of sight, his own humour becoming sour as soon as he saw who had entered the hall. He leant towards Ella slightly. “Ice daggers and your throwing knives at the same time?” He suggested. 

“Tempting, very, very tempting.” She responded lowly before standing stoically once more as the grouping came up to them. “Prince Nigel.” She bowed slightly. 

Nigel looked at her with a smirk. “My dear cousin, I see you are fulfilling the role of royal wife to the best of your ability.” He indicated to her stomach. “You are well and truly of this...domain now, it seems.” “Jotunheim is my home, so it very much is a domain I am happy to be a part of. With regards to my pregnancy, I am very fortunate to have been given a partner worthy of such a name which makes the process of carrying his child far more pleasant than can be assumed for others. How is your wife, actually? I have not seen her since you arrived.” 

Loki found himself biting the inside of his cheeks as he chuckled at Ella’s blatant comments. He noted the other Vanir with Nigel were clearly thinking similarly. 

Nigel however, did not see anything amusing. “She is at home in the Vanir palace, as is her place since declaring ones promiscuity to the realm is something not to be encouraged.” 

For a moment, Loki, Ella and the Jotnar around them, including Helbindi and Byleistr thought the Vanir royal to be joking, but the less than impressed look on his face as he glared at Ella’s stomach told them that he did indeed think such, resulting in more than one scoff. To her own shock, Ella was able to stifle her own laugh. “Norns, I was not aware a woman in a relationship, be she be married or otherwise was promiscuous should she come to carry a child, what with it being the sole purpose of the act of coitus.”

“You would, of course, take offence, as it referencing your own position, Cousin. None like to think themselves to be socially besmirched but your condition, the manner you present yourself, clothing and hair-wise, it only declares one thing, a lack of mortality and promiscuity.” 

Ella licked her bottom lip before cocking her head to the side slightly. “So pregnancy in a faithful relationship is promiscuous to you, Nigel?” He nodded. “How? Explain it to me.” He said nothing. “Do not give a statement as fact if it is not such. Tell me, in layman’s terms, how a woman, who is loyal to her partner, who partakes in consensual relations with him resulting in a child is akin to what you call a ‘whore’. I am only so curious to understand your logic on this matter, please, allow us to see as you do.”  

Nigel stood open-mouthed for a moment. Well….” “And what of the father’s of these young? The sires that breed them with their partners. Are they tarred with this brush also or is it simply us women that get so cruelly smeared as unclean, I am curious?” The look in his eyes told her his thoughts. “So your wife is a slut and you are pure? Oh, you silly little boy.” She stood in close to him. “You are very brave voicing such ludicrous claims in public. I would recommend not saying such things on this realm, Nigel, you will do yourself no favours. None will be too swift to stand by you as you say them. You and I both know who the many would side with on this, on this realm, Asgard, Vanaheim, Alfheim and such or do you recall how your cowardice through the war is viewed through the realms?” Nigel’s eyes darted to the side. “Oh yes, I heard of it, even here, and not from a single Jotnar, for they wanted to save me the shame of having one such as you a blood relative. When my brother and my mate sweat, bled and fought for the realms while you hid like a little bitch, a ‘ickle precious princess hiding behind excuses as to why he could not fight when the truth is there are poultry in a farmyard red in colour, that lay eggs and are called hens that are less chicken than you are.” She hissed. “I am not a whore and unlike you, my existence actually matters so get your filthy, misogynistic crap out of my sight before I make it that this coronation ends with your funeral and I will make it look self-inflicted or like an accident, as you plummet to your death for ever even considering insulting me, my mate and every female on this realm and so help me, if you even look like your considering scoffing at the females of this realm for their attire or for how many are currently celebrating carrying a child I will castrate you painfully for even thinking about thinking to laugh, I swear on the Norns themselves.” 

Nigel flinched and backed away slightly, glancing to Loki as he did. 

Loki, for his part, sneered openly. “I can see what you are thinking, ‘how could I let her act like this, act like she is in charge, does it make me less male to do so’. It does not because I will physically hold you down as she does it.” He hissed. “If you dare start trouble on our realm, you will bear the brunt of the consequences, I can assure you. What you did, trying to hurt us on Vanaheim for Ostara to get a reaction, this is not Vanaheim and you hold absolutely no power here and if one word of what was said as your warning so much as makes it outside of this and we will know and we will not take kindly to you rushing to your father or brother to defend your honour, Little Girl. You want to be a tough guy, I am right here, try it but I warn you, I am not in the mood for your petty behaviour and I can guarantee, one utterance of anything resembling ridicule for my realm and my brothers, my allies, Prince Thor and even his friends will stand by my side as I deal with you.” “You cannot say such things,” Nigel stuttered. 

“It seems he just did.” Nigel turned to see a grinning Thor. “Run along now, Nidge, Ella’s patience are wearing thin and none here can stop her, you know that.” 

Nigel scarpered quickly from their presence. 

“It’s rude to threaten your guests with castration, Ella,” Thor scolded. 

“It is rude to call your host a promiscuous whore also,” Ella argued. 

Thor, who had not been privy to that part of the conversation was forced to concede it was true. “That was brazen on his behalf.” He watched as Helbindi laughed and Byleistr stared worriedly at his sister. “Just do not do it in front of everyone, it may cause some to lose their dinner.” 

“I’ll try, but I cannot promise anything,” Ella smirked before eyeing their parents watching from a balcony close by. She merely smiled at them before going to greet another who had been so rudely delayed in doing so by Nigel’s prolonged time with them. 

* “She gets that from you,” Frigga commented to Odin. 

“I never threatened any man’s appendages.” “The manner in which she spoke, not what she said,” Frigga verified. “Thank the Norns she was born a girl. She is too vicious.” 

Odin said nothing of an instance that came to his memory when Frigga carried Thor where she all but swore to obliterate the building if one courtier did not cease staring at her in a manner she thought to be unacceptable. Looking at his daughter as she went back to smiling and being polite, he feared what would happen any that thought to insult Jotunheim while her husband was king. 

[docholligay]

Follow Water Down

I have been wandering around in the woods since I was a small child. My family was not particularly well off, and from the ages of probably 3 to 16, the only vacations we ever took were camping trips. We left the house for the woods nearly every weekend. I live in Montana, and so when I say camping trips, I don’t mean we headed off to the KOA with a pool, I mean if I walked away from the campsite I was in the goddamn National Forest. I was genuinely happy with this arrangement, as I was a strange child who grew up to be a strange adult, and I enjoyed the quiet, the sense of exploration, the smell of the trees. 

I began leaving the campsite nearly from the word go, and by the time I was about 8 or so, I was very much off by myself in the woods for the majority of the day, which leads us to our post today. There are people who would call my mom grossly neglectful for having allowed me to do so much on my own at such a young age, and even she gets bashful when she talks about it, but I credit it with a lot of positives: 

I have an extremely good sense of direction

I have a strong core of self-sufficiency and am not easily overwhelmed by anxiety

I can be alone in the quiet with my thoughts

I am rough and tumble as HELL, owing to many many many falls down the sides of mountains, huge gashes in my legs, being stalked by a mountain lion, and one very memorable miscalculation that ended in me falling off a (small) waterfall

When I meet my fear, I can master it*

So what I am here to present to you today are very basic survival skills such as I would teach my own child, such as I was taught as a child. This is by no means comprehensive, and if you intend to get seriously into outdoor life, I recommend both doing far more research, and taking a a Wilderness First Aid class, which are frequently offered when it’s NOT Covid, and which I take about once every 3-5 years (I am due). This is a primer for those who are young, or new, or mostly want to experience the wilderness by reading about me doing it. 

Follow Water Down. 

I cannot remember how old I was when I learned this. It’s the sort of thing that is a part of my makeup, my mother must have told me when I was only a toddler and its stuck with me so hard that it’s one of the first things I tell people. 

If you are lost: 

Water will always lead you back to civilization eventually. Join up with the stream. See which way its going. Go that way. This is obviously not significantly helpful if you are lost in a flat desert plain but then again, I did start this by saying I was a child of the woods and not the desert. This seems like such an easy trick that people often ignore me when I say it, but it is the simplest thing for a child to remember. 

I can’t remember how old I was when I got lost in a tangle of hills and mountains in the Little Belts, where the trail faded but I kept going in my normal bullheaded way. But I was well and truly lost by the time it was about 3 pm, and in some ways I wish I had worn a step tracker back in those days because I am extremely certain I went miles and miles, as one does when they leave immediately after breakfast and don’t come back till dinner. I had no idea where I was, where the campsite was, or what direction I should be going. 

I was not thrilled. 

But I was not a kid who sat down and cried, in that I had smaller concerns before, and so could easily grow to meet the larger ones. I simply walked down the mountain, knowing a valley was more likely to have a stream I could easily join. Lo and behold, there in that little valley was a snowmelt creek, and I followed it downstream, knowing eventually there would be a house, or a campground, or something. In a twist of glorious good luck, it actually led me back toward where the campsite was, and as I began to recognize things, I easily clipped into our campsite long before any sign of trouble. 

Follow Water Down. If you aren’t near a stream, head for the nearest valley, and follow the valley. This will generally lead you to water. People will tell you to stay put and that is WAY smarter than wandering aimlessly in circles, which is why I say to follow something. You think you won’t go in circles, but you will. By following a streambed, not only are you doubtlessly heading back to civilization on a long enough timeline, but you keep yourself from doing that. 

Your Pack: 

Before you go out for the day, you should have a simple day pack. Mine is an Osprey Hikelite 18, but I hike all the time, and you don’t need something that technical. A plain ol Jansport will work as long as it fits you well. I do however, really approve of and recommend a waist clip. I also think a pocket for a water bottle on the outside is really useful, but you’re not going to fucking die if you have to take off your pack to get to your water bottle. I just find it takes up space I don’t want. 

Gear:

More important than your pack itself is what you have in it. Again, this is according to people named Doc, who are me. This is stuff I always take with me when I am by myself, on a trail where it would be realistic to assume I would not see someone else for hours. This is like 95% of Montana trails, or any time that I am off trail. 

Compass. You can get fancy, pretty compasses, but a lot of times they lack the actual essentials you need. I like this guy, which is well made, can be clipped to you backpack easily, and is inexpensive. I don’t have the time or space to really try to teach you how to use a compass, but here’s a really good simple primer from the American Hiking Society. 

Paper Map. I sometimes break this one, admittedly, but I shouldn’t. Having a paper map of the area is always a really smart practice, and used in combination with the compass, can help you get unlost quickly, or at the very least give you an idea of how close to any given outpost you are. 

Water Bottle. Please don’t tell me you were going to attempt to leave without this. I have no preferences on one, shockingly, and I’m being serious. I’ve been given to use an old disposable one, who gives a shit. 

Water Filter. Now THIS I did not have as a child, because my parents didn’t know any better, but if I follow in the grand tradition of my people and release my child into the mountains, I will give them one for certain. I knew what kind of water to look for if one was going to drink from a stream, and I did so, which probably explains why I am not susceptible to ~tummy upsets~ to this day. However, it would have been smarter for me to have one of these. I like LifeStraw but Sawyer makes a perfectly good one. Look for lightweight, it’s a day pack, kids. 

Knife. I have many many feelings about knives, which would require its own post, but this is fairly essential for being out and about. This is not a thing I would necessarily cheap out on, though there are fine options at most price points. This is my knife:

The Gerber Propel AO. The serrated and straight blade edge means there’s a lot of options for use as a tool, I find the blade to be strong and hold an edge well. Most American-made Gerbers (be sure and check, as they have a much shittier Chinese-made division) are incredibly well made knives. Leatherman multi-tools and Swiss Army Knives are, if you ask people named Doc who are me, a waste of weight and size, but if I were to buy a Leatherman, it would be a Free K2X. I would not buy a Swiss Army Knife. 

A jacket/fleece/pullover. Listen, i am the last one who wants to carry this shit but if you get lost overnight (as has never happened to me, kinehara.) you are going to want it. Read up on what the lowest temperatures are, and rate it to that. Depending on what mountain you are in, this is going to vary widely. And for the love of god, wear pants. I know, I know, it’s in the 70s and you’re hoooooooot but seriously, you’ll be less likely to injure yourself and you won’t fucking freeze. 

Flashlight/headlamp. 

There are fancy firestarters, but honestly I just throw in a bic. 

Food! Clif bars are great for this, lightweight, high calorie, keep well. this is in addition to your sandwich or whatever you’re packing for planned eating. 

Sunscreen/bug spray. Don’t be stupid. 

Whistle. Three sharp shot blasts is the easy and international sign for help. 

FIRST AID KIT this has its own thing. A first aid kit can be very basic to very intense. Our group first aid kit is more intense, but when I’m stuffing a day pack, I want stuff that’s light. 

Ibuprofen

Bandages

Gauze

Leukotape

wound wipes/antibac

Imodium, benedryl, caffeine

Oxycontin. This is leftover from long ago and basically exists in case I break my leg and have to drag myself out of there, or, as we like to say, a Worst Case Scenario. 

That’s it! It essentially fits in a bento box. 

You will want to be wearing a sunhat of some sort, sunglasses at hand, and a watch. Not a smart watch, a watch watch. It’s good to know what time it is, better to know that after your phone dies. Attach bear bells to your pack, or your shoe, or something. You do not want to surprise a bear, that is how people die. 

You may notice that I do not have a phone, external battery, GPS tracker or anything like that listed. GPS trackers are not a bad idea if you want to invest the money in backcountry--my wife has one--but I never have and I do not consider them essential. Phones and external batteries are not useful to me, and in the places I go there’s often not service. If there IS service, I find I’m more irritated than not by the people with me, who often can’t pull their faces out of telling their audience how much of a life they have to actually have one. Be alone with your fucking thoughts for once. 

Which leads me to my next thing: DO NOT WEAR HEADPHONES TO HIKE OH MY GOD. Being able to hear what’s going on around you is key to safety, and also to allowing you to get your bearings. If you are listening to music or something, you are far more likely to sneak up on something, or allow it to sneak up on you. Don’t do it. It’s a terrible idea. 

Should I bring bear spray? This is an excellent question! We have ample bear spray, and I often wear it but I just as often wear Montana Bear Spray (a gun). It’s easier to practice with a gun, I feel more sure of how to use it, and I’m comfortable around it. That being said, this is not the story for most of America, and I understand that. So make sure you are VERY familiar with how to use your bear spray. 

I suppose this went off the rails into supplies more than “tips for survival” but honestly I would rather help you all AVOID trouble than help you out of it. It’s easier to pack clif bars than set a rabbit snare, and its easier to not get lost than it is to build shelter. Also, this is already at 2,000 words, so if you have a SPECIFIC question, let me know! 

*Apologies to Phillip Pullman, but if I were going to get anything from HDM tattooed on me, this sentiment would be it, the only problem being the actual line is “You ent afraid are you?” “Not yet. When I am, I shall master the fear.” which doesn’t look as good but damn has that resonated with me since I read it.