#there's so many more favs but honestly I don't like rereading much of my work unless I'm editing 😅

[slice-of-magenta]

Thank you @scribeoffate @rhyslahey and @slumop for tagging me as well! 🧡💕🥰

RULES:

post the top 5 works you’re most proud of that you released in 2022 (not necessarily your most popular)

your top 4 current WIPs that you’re excited to release in the new year

your top 3 biggest improvements in your writing (or art) over the past year

your top 2 resolutions (ways you wish to improve your writing/blog) for the new year

and your number 1 favorite line you’ve written this year!

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Top 5 works I'm proud of: one of my top 5 is currently a wip. The rest:

fire close to the heart (platonic sciles)  I just liked that I finally made a fic where Stiles is saving Scott. (It's messy and I love it.)

Inked (Scott + Lydia, gen)  I look back at it and see i should have done some stuff differently but! Tattoos are so interesting and I wanted platonic scydia feels and I got that. I love them.

A Werewolf Heat (sciles)   this was another experiment with smut. tho I didn't go that deep into it as much as I wanted to and I keep saying I might continue it 😂 and I DO think about that. A lot. Every time I write lol. But honestly I want to do another that is so much better than that one? From my reread, it needs editing. it got way more love in kudos and in comments (in my opinion) than I expected. and I was so proud. I also love when fics talk about heats. Its werewolves! Especially with Scott! Why not take advantage of that. And I tried! 🥰

A Visit (kira pov)  I don't know why but I'm so happy about this one. It was the first time I wrote for kira. Maybe it was the first fic I did research with too (altho I kept it to teen wolf's interpretation of skin walkers mostly). This was a gift for momentofmemory 🧡

2. 4 current WIPS (many may not get posted before new year tho)

A fanart for an existing fic. I may have to redraw kira since she's very close to the frame and I want to center more attention on her too.

A fluffy Getting Together Malira fic

Fic with Rafael. I have two that I'm thinking to combine. This focused a lot on Scott too, so I'm contemplating to save it for Scott appreciation.

Sekret fic. That I hope gets finished before the year ends.

3. Three biggest improvements in writing/art

I'm getting comfortable drawing hands and bodies! (Art) I refused to draw those before.

I think my grammar is getting slightly better. Or at least, I worry about it less. Which is MAJOR for me.

the wips listed above and outside it is showing me that I am capable of indulging more. It's fanfic after all.

4. Top 2 resolutions for blog/writing?

Write more fic that goes out of my comfort zone. (Sciles is awesome and I will still write them a lot, but I want to explore different characters and other ships that I like too. Like Scisaac, Scydia, Jennifer/Kali, Malira, some POLYSHIPS, Lydia centric stuff, etc. Those are examples, and I don't promise anything.)

An art resolution would be to practice lighting and shading some more!

Im gonna skip the last question because that's hard. My favorite is in one of my WIPS.

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Tagging, feel free to ignore me because I don't exactly recall who did it or not 😅 (most likely everyone here lol): @scintalla @thiamsxbitch @cmnzoq @kailaris-rites @redmoonfever @momentofmemory (because everyone must tag her. It's rules. Made up by me.)

[nekrosmos]

*burst into your room through your window* hi- *coughs glass shards out* I am here to say MANY things, positive things about your fic you wrote, but honestly it's more like my live reaction and my fav parts of the fic, it's gonna be long!!!! I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND READING ME YAP!!!

First of all, ∞/10, this is your first fic??? IT'S SO GOOD!! you got the atmosphere the vulnerability the softness the banter AND the good ol smut down, I love it, it was like I was joining them in the fishing trip because of how nice the visual was

ok from here on out it's all about my fav parts of the fic HEHE

the two had aged together is!!!!!!so!!!!!!!!freaking!!!!!!sWEET!!!!!they've been through it all together for the longest time!!!!!!

something about this just makes me change the way Im looking at Price, like..."he just love her" is such a deceivingly simple line but it holds so much weight. He may have "love" him but it was never a full attachment, rather just...embracing the love he was offered. He loved her because he could, not because of...everything el1se that matters. At least that's how I see it and GOD it hurts so good

ah hem AKSJDHAKS how did Nik not choke on air for that- anyways

Im getting my pitchfork for that CO (even tho the bastard is not around anymore) and the way Nik also got him?! *wails*

"there had been a lifetime of missed opportunities between the two" IS SUCH A GOOOOODDD LINEEEE GRRGGR YOUR BRAIN!!

🥺something about them giggling and being themselves just GRIPS MY HEART!!!!

it's the fact that the "friend" turned to "love" that got me feral I was SOOOO KASJHDKADJ hAPPY for em

chef au....

Nik the mAN YOU ARE!!! THE REST I COULD LIVE WITH!!!!GRRR!!! SUCH GOOD LINE!!! HIS NIK!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was walking when I read this part and basically fist the air in victory KASJHDKAJH also I love the train of thought here for Price...it's such a him thing to overthink

there is nothing wrong with that - URGH RIP MY HEART OUT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!

again, another great line, frame this and smack it to my forehead because yes, that is Nik

I really really like in between the spicy scenes there are goofy scenes because...my god it just make everything lighter and more...how to say? real. In the moment and all, yk, it's so nice reading them laughing and stuff. But also this line "their romantic relationship wasn't born today, but weeks ago" again, chef kiss

very long ramble and Im surprised im allowed to type this much into an ask (ah heck it could get cut for all I know but) just know this fic was a lifesaver during my lunch break, had an extremely hard day and this helped a bunch.

Im looking forward to see your future fics if you do write them!!

Okay I'm officially smiling like an idiot and I think I'm gonna have to reread your ask many, many times because HOLY SHIT you just made me so unbelievably happy ​😭​😭​❤️​❤️​❤️​

It was my first fic with them !! I've been writing for a long time, switched to english a few years ago and have been writing casually ever since ,,,, But this was the longest fic I've ever posted and it was a nice challenge honestly !!

Also the way you pointed out some of your favorite scenes jdvlskjd,vpùidjvbpvj I'm losing my mind, I'm so happy ​😭​ I literally couldn't ask for better feedback !!!

I actually really like your interpretation of that line about his ex wife !! I left it pretty open so people can hc whatever they want :3c In my personal hc, he really did love her immensely, but he kept hurting her unintentionally by never being around, never giving her what she needed because of his work, etc. ​Just one of those "it wasn't meant to be" relationships. (Also, other random hc, but Nik was here at Price's wedding, he got along really well with his ex wife, but everything about it broke his fucking heart over and over again. Oops 💔)

And I'm so glad you pointed out the banters during the smut scene !! It's my favorite thing to do honestly !! To me, sex scenes don't have to be so serious all the time, I like when characters communicate while it's happening, I like when they're laughing together <3 And these two have so much shared history that it just makes sense to me !!

God, again, thank you so much for this, you really did just make my day Gomz !!!! You're absolutely lovely !!

[ashtraythief]

Hey! So ive been a long time reader of ur underneath verse (since like.. 2018? Maybe even 2017?) and i just wanted to drop by and tell u how much im enjoying rereading ur writing! Like in general i think this is one of my fav fics series just bc its so extensive and well done and thought out and fleshed out so well it works so well? Like seeing all the different angles and the way u choose to frame things is really fun for me and kinda inspires my own writing in some aspects.

Ive never read the whole thing all in one go before so ive decided to do that right now and im just about done with the pied pipers song - more specifically willys chapter. And i kinda needed to let u know that ur series really stands out to me just bc of how many glimpses into other characters and all these different povs of the same thing like on it stands out on a technical level but then ur actual writing of these things is so good and compelling and like as an outsider pov bitch it hits the spot for me so well? Like ur writing is never stale and its always interesting.

I specifically wanted to take this time to mention that i really love willy and winstons characters and how u went about it. Like im ngl the way u wrote them kinda makes me want to cry tears of happiness for them bc they have found ppl who appreciate them and they have connections with other ppl but then the bittersweet tang of jensen and willy is kinda fucking me up rn /pos djjdjdjd like in general u really do the bittersweet jensen is stuck undercover angle really well and it HURTS so good

But yes i dont really have a good concise message or comment to leave beyond the fact that i keep stopping every few sentences to get up and jump bc im so excited about what im reading i need to get rid of that excess energy lol so sorry if this is all over the place and a really messy message! I just really wanted to let u know how much im enjoying reading it all rn. Thank you so much for sharing ur writing with us and for continuing to write for this series its so fun!

omg nonnie, I'm kinda speechless here (this is the second wonderful message in two days so I'm kinda overwhelmed. is it send wonderful messages week somewhere??)

I just am so grateful and this message made me so happy. never apologize for maybe not having a five point outline lol, this is amazing.

The underneath verse has always been my fandom baby, so praise for it is already amazing, but the pied piper fic and Winston and Willy epsecially, it just makes my heart so full. Ten years ago, they definitely started out as stock characters of mob drivers, because I didn't think this fic would get so big, but then it did, and Willy especially became a real character. a) because I knew he'd fall in love with Jensen too, as anyone does really and b) because I looooove the bittersweet undercover Jensen shtick where I write from other character's POV and the reader knows how wrong they're getting it but they don't *mu har har* (yeah I'm a little mean sometime. sorry?)

but in all seriousness, the Willy chapter, I'ev been working on that for months. And I kept adding things and rewriting things and trying to get it perfect even though I know that most people who read the story mostly care about Jared and Jensen (which is totally fair and understandable), but I care about him and there are a few people out there who do too (and I love you for it, so much), but with Willy, I just wante to do this /right/. I've come to love him so much, and he's come to be so important to Jensen, it felt like he and Winston really deserve their own story told even though that's kind of ridiculous because they're not real, but they're a little real to me now. All this to say, nonnie, this comment and your appreciation of Willy means so fucking much to me. And my poor alpha reader who read like four drafts of this (seriously, M. is a saint) and my beta readers who then had to beta four iterations of this. To know that this effort is appreciated this much honestly make me cry a little (I am not having the greatest time right now, so I cry easily but the point still stands. Thank you.)

This message was actually such an energy boost I'm currently trying to fix the next timestamp, lol so I'll have something to post next month. You're a true treasure, nonnie <3

[faiell]

hello, nice to meet you!

i'm back at the top after rambeling about how i got into drarry, and so here is the fic rec: "genesis (you don't know what it means to win)" by crossourbridges on ao3. you don't have to read the rest if you don't want to.

i also got into drarry 20 years late, but let me tell you another secret: i've never read a page of a harry potter book in my life.

all my knowledge about it is from a friend that i like to listen to her obseasions and pick the ones i wanna get into (while i still enjoy hearing about the ones i don't). one time though she sat me down and we watched the movies, like 1-5 and i got bored at some point so we left it, but one thing that stayed with me was the character of draco.

i saw a sad, hhhhorney loser who just craves attention from EVERYONE, every gender, every house, the poor dude just needs to get layed, but without knowing the canon i'm pretty sure he never will.

that was a couple of years ago, and recently i suddenly remembered him bc i noticed i enjoy ships that are "a harmless prick loser and the misfourtunate everyman that the prick fell in love with, who is actually just insane enough himself to slowly but surly love the prick back".

and so i was like "i'm sure draco and harry are a ship. i wonder what their fanfics are like" and now for weeks i've been in this rabbithole of PROFOUND SHIT THAT MADE ME BELIEVE IN LOVE FOR A HOT SECOND, so yea. this is the reason i'm reccomending you this one. it's one of those stories that are the perfect length and much too short at the same time.

i hope you enjoy :)

first off, thank you so much for the fic rec! i will definitely check it out.

the journey of you becoming a drarry fan is a hilarious read, i'm so happy you shared it with me! hats off to you for being that friend who enjoys hearing about others' obsessions. we need more like you in the world. it's amazing that you absorbed just enough from her all those years ago to have the instinct to say AHA!! i bet people love making these two losers kiss! and u were right.

my turn! let me ramble (for even longer than you did) abt how i happened to the same drarry pit of "profound shit that made me believe in love for a hot second" with you. so on the contrary, i've always been a big HP fan, in the sense that i grew up with the book series and watched the movies. the books are why i became a big reader when i was a kid. i've always been a shipper, i always knew drarry existed, and many of my close friends were obsessed with it throughout the years--like losing weight because they were reading so much fic in bed their muscles atrophied kind of obsessiveness. for some reason, i never engaged. i was like yeah, obviously there's good stuff there, but i'm just not going to dip in.

then one day a few months ago (oct 2023 to be exact), i was bored at work and saw a thread on my home page titled something along the lines of 'absolute favourite fic regardless of fandom'. i was curious and maybe just itching for something fun to read so i clicked in and a highly upvoted reply caught my eye. the user's fav fic was the HP rewrite Mirror of Ecidyrue series by starbrigid. i was honestly really bored, and a draco POV retelling sounded fun, so i dove straight in.

i loved it, and holy shit it was long. i think the entire fic is longer than the og books? but yeah basically i rly enjoyed it, and i read it fast, finishing in only a week or so. i think ever since the transphobia bs happened i distanced myself from everything related to the franchise--i used to reread the books every few years, and i had stopped doing that. reading that fic made me realize how much i missed the world and characters, and how i could have it all again without shame by reading fic! i mean, starbrigid had basically rewritten the entire series and added their own interesting lore and worldbuilding, and that was even better than going back to reread the books like i used to. i also really enjoyed draco pov… i knew i definitely wanted more of that.

and so i went into the ao3 drarry tag to find more content, because i'd heard years ago from my obsessed friends that there was a goldmine of good HP fic there, and i never resurfaced lol. i feel like once u go in u can't ever get out cause it's a good ship and the writers are so talented, and there's YEARS, decades of content to catch up on. i remember also thinking that i'd be satisfied just reading and eating it all up (whereas i'm usually pretty active in making fanart when i join a fandom), but um, a few weeks ago i was like kinda like hmm i wanna see what MY brand of drarry looks like. so now im here posting art of it!

they are thankfully super fun to draw. i'm just having fun here, but i do have a small goal - i wanna draw fic fanart to sort of… give back some joy and show gratitude towards my fav writers. other than that, i'm here to chill and look at pictures and words of them making out.

[charlieslowartsies]

Been re-reading KGA and the hyperfixation has sunk its claws into me and refuses to let me go, but honestly I don’t mind it.

Speaking of not minding shit that holds and refuses to let go, any commentary on Mike and Marion’s relationship? For some reason its one of my favorites in the series (prolly because Marionette has always been my favorite FNAF character) regardless of how borderline toxic or even codependent it could be interpreted as.

haha I'm glad you're enjoying the reread! At some point I want to sit down and try to reread LB-GS myself. Maybe after LW is completed.

As always, this bitch RAMBLES.

Marion is def one of my favorites too. I'm more a Bonnie fan though, but despite that, I didn't really expect to find so much interest in Mike and Marion becoming so close. Of course, as I've mentioned before, Foxy was the original character I intended to be closest to Mike Schmidt.

Marion and Freddy had other plans apparently lmao. The story really started demanding things from me around Devil's Spine and Ghost Strings. Characters wanted things I tried giving them.

The more I mapped out Marion's history and fleshed out dumbass golden retriever Mike, I realized I really wanted to lean into them being inseparable with the mindset of: To be loved is to be changed, and to be used is to be harmed.

Marion was used a lot in his past, so he was harmed, and he harmed others for it. He had misguided wishes, he didn't listen to others advice, and he wanted to blindly protect the restaurant and the children.

Marionette, much as he made poor choices and harmed so many, was also a victim of grooming/true cruelty from William Afton. He put so much blind faith and trust into Afton in the very beginning, and drew lots of similar traits from him as well that didn't become apparent until Afton was gone and the other Animatronics noticed how...intense Marion was, in trying to protect and control every angle.

This doesn't make what he did right. And it took him a long time to learn the lessons he needed. (LW being my fav example when he apologizes to Max/Michael for how he treated the zombie, indicating something is shifting between them especially. I'm SO excited for the end of LW where Max gets the Gift from Puppet, the thing he's wanted most.)

Most of that undoing was thanks to Mike, who was both kind and easy going while becoming less of a rug as time went on to Puppet, who mentions more than once across the series he isn't used to being challenged.

Mike came into the restaurant with no understanding of the horrors that occurred. Of what Marion had done, or could do. He just knew Marion helped him out a little bit for those first five nights, which meant Mari was his friend. Once Mike is a friend with someone he accepts them/loves them but also speaks his mind if he thinks it's needed.

And then of course this comes around to the side of Marion's thinking. 'This is my person, someone I can trust, who won't harm me/my family. I need him. He won't use Fredbear like Springbonnie was used. He is loyal and affectionate and tries to meet me halfway, even when we don't agree on something. And if I lose him...what's left? What else is there for me, but to go back to the way things were? I can't ever let that happen.'

Marion's going to be protective, naturally. Flip-side being that he needs to work on not taking that too far. Coming back in Last Shift, I didn't want like...a perfectly stable and fixed Marionette just appearing out of Lefty and having everyone go 'Why is he playing nice all of a sudden??' Because frankly the in-character response from them all minus Mike would be "We don't trust him far as Foxy can throw him" which....fair.

I didn't want 100% of his growth as a character being off screen. I wanted that to be earned and for readers to be given it, so the Revived design and the strings being tied to Mike are for that door way to be opened.

I wanted Marion to do the work, but Mike also had some growing to, that he had worked on in FF. (Marion was breaking down in GS, but he'd only split apart because Mike goes against Mari's warnings and ends up getting the Puppet destroyed when he was trying to help.)

You mentioned the borderline between how dark their bond could go, and yes I wanted that showcased too. I wanted a balancing act.

Repeating history won't do any good, especially not for Mike if Marion goes too overboard. At the end of the day though, Mike can dial Marion back, and keep him on a better straight-and-narrow than the lil devil used to exist on.

I think what helps steer away from the dangerous edge of what I would consider true toxic-ness is Mike can call Marion out, effectively. Likewise, Marion can call out Mike to. There's also Foxy, who is equally happy to call Marion tf out, as well as others once they see Marion isn't how he used to be.

Marion's themes/lessons in LW are: Being different doesn't mean the other is bad. To be loved is to be changed. And they overlap with Mike's, which are:

You can be put back together even if broken. No one can be strong all the time.

Is being too controlling harmful as fuck? Yes. I do not condone it , obviously. That's why Marion's story is NOT: "he became more possessive and was allowed to, and go on hurting himself/Mike or others." The narrative at the end of LS and into LW began rewarding Marion for trying to work on his aggressiveness at others. He was trying.

He choose to let Mike go, not letting him fully die out in Limbo. Then protected him from Henry's Rage where-before, all he could do was hide in Lefty and try to give hints and clues. He gained more agency the more he did the Right thing. (Of course, Mike rebuilt him a body and helped him come back.) And out of the gate in LW we have Mike advising Marion heavily to work on his attitude.

So Marion reaches out to one of the Mini Music Men in LW, and this ends up earning him a small friendship that chapters later saves Max and Gregory's life. Mari didn't have to use threats, and he wasn't in the scene but the ripples of his actions caused this effect. He also started listening to the DCA instead of ignoring or simply powering them down, and that meant he was able to see things from their perspective and help them out instead of pushing them away. Marion's gunna get softer the longer he spends anchored to Mike Schmidt. In some ways, Mike Schmidt will harden a tad, but not to the point of changing much beyond his typical kindness. More like maturing, and understanding to not launch himself head first into everything.

Basically Marion needed some socialization lmao. Mike unknowingly helped that early on (like, think GS days) and then after he got him back he noticed the problems better/clearer.

While I always hope people interpret the series the way I envision it, everyone reads differently and has their own life experiences that colors their thinking. Which is p neat, but if nothing else...I just hope people have a good time reading the fics as I do writing them out.

[wrongcaitlyn]

thoughts on i can fix him (no really i can)

sorry this isn’t abt the fic i have no more questions but your responses are so great 😭

DONT APOLOGIZE AT ALL I LOVE LOVE LOVE TALKING ABOUT TAYLOR SWIFT like i honestly get worried that i talk about her too much a lot bc irl im always told i need to know how to have conversations about things OTHER than her so like knowing that y'all wanna know my opinions on these things is actually the coolest thing ever and i love it <333

first of all, i LOVE the vibes of it. i choose to try not to think about the source material of these things (i've never been the hugest fans of connecting songs to the actual artist who wrote them, idk it just feels invasive) so the entire time i was thinking abt lucy gray baird/coriolanus bc of a post that rachel zegler made months ago for tom blyth's bday with a tee-shirt that said "I can fix him" like idk i just KNEW the song was gonna be snowbaird coded AND I WAS CORRECT

the vibes seemed so cowboy like me like i was genuinely surprised?? the whole thing seemed like it was very taken out of modern society, and like, fugitive au, and i was recently just reading this 1870s small town au (had just finished it like the day before ttpd i think) and so i was SO HERE FOR THAT KIND OF VIBE

overall i just loveeeed the imagery in these lyrics. it's one of those songs where the production just matches the content so well and taylor is truly incredible at that!!

one of my FAVORITE lyrics (most def my fav of the song, possibly one of my favorites of the album was

They shake their heads sayin', "God, help her" When I tell 'em he's my man But your good Lord doesn't need to lift a finger

idk why but the way she said it, the lyrics, the "good lord doesnt need to lift a finger" like GOD it just scratched an itch in my brain so perfectly (the entire album, i felt like she was singing it perfectly, there were so many little moments where i was just like GOD THIS WAS SUNG EXACTLY AS IT NEEDED TO BE SUNG)

just reread the lyrics for this bc i wanna make a worthy response (if y'all EVER want an opinion on ANY taylor swift song or any other artist i've mentioned before like PLEASE feel free lyrical analysis is my entire life)

and like

i seriously have to stop with au ideas

bc just the mention of texas has me thinking OMG FUGITIVE NICO X COWBOY WILL SOLACE AU and im like STFU BRAIN YOU ALREADY HAVE TOO MUCH YOU'RE WORKING ON but like i mean its TEXAS

The dopamine races through his brain On a six-lane Texas highway His hand so calloused from his pistol Softly traces hearts on my face

and the way it just ends so suddenly with "woah maybe i can't" is just😭😭i cackled at that it was hilarious

conclusion: i haven't really re-listened to it bc it wasn't one of those songs that stood out to me in the first listen (i've been listening to the album on loop since it came out bc im still trying to process all the songs, but there were definitely some that i repeated over and over again bc they were my favorite). i don't really like ratings because i feel like every song has so much potential, and i just haven't understood it yet? like, particularly with taylor songs, i actually didn't like the folklore or evermore albums when i first listened to them. then when i did again, they become two of my favorite albums holding some of my favorite songs. so all i can say right now is that it isn't one of my favorites off the album, but i do love certain aspects of it!

[umber-cinders]

°´❤•.¸♥ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓥𝓸𝓲𝓬𝓮 𝓐𝓭𝓿𝓲𝓬𝓮 ♥¸.•❤

🐻 fav vs. least fav trope?

🐶 your fav character to read / write about, or create for?

🐕 a sentence you read/wrote that stuck with you?

🥔fav fanfic oat?

🐿️fav fanart oat?

🐐a character you’d like to write more for, read about, or create more for?

🐌 a trope you’re embarrassed to like? (guilty pleasure)

📦 choose one genre of fanfiction, the rest have to go!

🍄‍🟫do you prefer canon or au?

🐂a trope you refuse to write abt / read abt / create for?

🥧 do you prefer one shots or multi-chaptered fics?

💼 summarize the last fic you read / wrote in one sentence.

🤎describe your perfect conditions for writing/ drawing, ect.

👜 Have you ever deleted one of your published fics / art?

🐡who / what inspired you to read / write / create?

📔how do you deal with art block / writers block?

👞do you prefer collabs or working independently?

🥠one thing you’d like to improve on in your writing / art?

🥮fav vs. least fav of your works?

🥥 wild card! ask anything. Not mine but OP can found but I wanted to ask you these! -Goblin- 🥧🐌🥔🐕📦

°´❤•.¸♥ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓥𝓸𝓲𝓬𝓮 𝓐𝓭𝓿𝓲𝓬𝓮 ♥¸.•❤

Hello magical goblin anon 👀💌 Since this a lot of questions I'll stick under the ✂️

🐻 fav vs. least fav trope?

♡ I don't think I have much of a favorite trope, but I do have to say my least favorite is honestly fluff. Like, I don't hate it but it is usually boring to me when the entire story is ooey gooey lovey shit. I feel like its unrealistic.

🐶 your fav character to read / write about, or create for?

♡ Currently my fave characters are M'Baku (Black Panther) and Gravik (Secret Invasion). I just think they're neat ✨

🐕 a sentence you read/wrote that stuck with you?

♡ 😭I honestly cannot think of one for this lmao I will forget entire scenes until my brain is like "hey remember that time when–"

🥔fav fanfic oat?

♡ This one is also hard because I do not have an all time favorite because so many are fun to reread for me. A lot of them are old fics too. The longer multi chapter kind that keep me hooked in

🐿️fav fanart oat?

♡ 😬Another thing I don't have a favorite of because Indecisive ✨

🐐a character you’d like to write more for, read about, or create more for?

♡ Gravik 👽 Because almost no one wrote anything (rightfully so with how disney handled Secret Invasion) but I find him fascinating. I usually write things myself when that happens

🐌 a trope you’re embarrassed to like? (guilty pleasure)

♡ Honestly cannot think of one. I'll read anything if it sounds interesting 😂No shame in my game

📦 choose one genre of fanfiction, the rest have to go!

♡ Dead Dove Do Not Eat 🕊 🪦

🍄‍🟫do you prefer canon or au?

♡ I like both but sometimes AU is better for exploring a character in different situation.

🐂a trope you refuse to write abt / read abt / create for?

♡ Considering I never really focus on tropes in a story, I can't think of one for this either.

🥧 do you prefer one shots or multi-chaptered fics?

♡ Multi Chapter Please! Oneshots are nice but I love a story to really sit down and read

💼 summarize the last fic you read / wrote in one sentence.

♡ A woman finds out her abrupt one night stand with her alien ex boyfriend gets her pregnant

🤎describe your perfect conditions for writing/ drawing, ect.

♡ Warm cup of green tea with honey and a lil bit of oatmilk, my favorite candle lit and it's nice and cool with my oversized snuggy on. Usually got some Afro-Lofi going in the background too lol (lmao this sounds kinda romantic)

👜 Have you ever deleted one of your published fics / art?

♡ Art—yes, Fics—no. I only deleted some art cause it was for someone who turned out not to be an actual friend

🐡who / what inspired you to read / write / create?

♡ I started both writing and drawing because of anime. When I was a kid, anime like Inuyasha, Naruto and Bleach were shows I loved to write and draw for/about. I need to get back into Bleach...

📔how do you deal with art block / writers block?

♡ I stop and work on a different story all together. OR I just stop trying to force myself to continue until my brain has had time to recover. Writing is fun for me and I only wanna write something I'd actually read.

👞do you prefer collabs or working independently?

♡ I've never done a collab with anyone before. I don't know how that works tbh but I'm not opposed to it.

🥠one thing you’d like to improve on in your writing / art?

♡ For art, lmao EVERYTHING On writing 🤔I'm not sure.

🥮fav vs. least fav of your works?

♡ My favorite work so far has been Winter Moon and I think my least favorite is Incubus. Not because its not good but because I always have trouble writing a story centered around two canon characters.

Thank you for asking anon. Gave my brain a workout😄💖✨

[wilddragonflying]

Alright, tagged by @tiltingheartand and I'm writing this on mobile bc otherwise I'll forget so forgive any typos/weirdness!

How many works do you have on AO3?

247, however a bunch of those are from the Collaborations series! It's a series collecting all of the fics that @queerpeasantchic and I have written 😁

Total AO3 word count?

3,093,324 (2,065,618 of which is from the aforementioned Collaborations)

What fandoms do you write for?

Ahahahahahaha ummmm

9-1-1, Roswell: New Mexico, Baldur's Gate 3, Fallout (as a whole), Detroit: Become Human, Sandman, Avengers, Stranger Things, Borderlands, MCU, Teen Wolf, Dragon Age, Far Cry (specifically New Dawn), The Witcher, Overwatch, House of Ashes, Harry Potter, Skyrim, Mass Effect, Justice League, Kingsman, The Quarry, Wonder Woman, How to Train Your Dragon, Buzzfeed Unsolved(don't think I actually published anything for that one tho)

Honestly like. If I'm in a fandom, odds are I WILL write a fic for it at some point

Top five fics by kudos?

A Question of Pack (Teen Wolf, sterek, canon-compliant thru I think s2? Been a while since I've reread it, but people are still reading it! Collab w/ @queerpeasantchic)

Between the Drinks and the Morning (Witcher, Geraskier, PWP)

Rumor Has It (9-1-1, Buddie, 5 times people thought buddie were divorced + 1 time they realized they want to be married)

What (Not) to Tell Your Friends (Teen Wolf, Sterek, established relationship w/ sex-repulsed ace!Derek where the rest of the pack finds out sterek have never had sex and meddle; another collab w/ @queerpeasantchic)

Two Steps Forward (9-1-1, buddie, Ramon and Helena come to visit after Ramon's retirement party and they misunderstand buddie's relationship, featuring Ramon trying Very Hard and not quite hitting the mark, but acting sincerely)

Do you respond to comments?

I will if there's a question or if the commenter is being a dick - odds are I'm more likely to respond if they're an asshole because I like tearing them apart them freezing the comment thread and deleting any other comment attempts 😂

Fic with angstiest ending?

Oh jeez I don't know I don't...... think I've ever done a non-happy/hopeful ending?????

Fic w/ happiest ending?

.... see above 😂 most of my endings are happy!

Do you get hate on fics?

Yepper-ooni 😂 I actually have a couple of fics that were motivated entirely by some idiots who didn't understand the concept of 'don't like don't read' when it comes to messed up characters having messed up relationship dynamics 😂

Do you write smut?

I sure do! Surprise myself with it sometimes, but sometimes you just gotta sit down and bang out 6k words about your favs banging

Craziest crossover?

Hmm I don't typically do crossovers, but I did write a couple leverage/supernatural fics way back when I started writing & posting fics; that's the only one coming to mind right offhand

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Ye! Or at least, had some where a request to translate was commented lol

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

See the very first answer 😂 I co-write loads of fic w/ @queerpeasantchic but I also like to talk about my WIPs w/ people like @tiltingheartand who is wonderful to bounce ideas off of and who has provided much food for thought & inspo 💖

All time favorite ship?

Oh God that's a toughie 🙈 I gotta say either Parker/Hadison/Eliot, or buddie, or maybe sterek???? It's so hard to choose

WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

Oh Jesus *guiltily glances at google drive* there are.... way too many 🙈

Writing strengths?

Hmm I like to think I'm good at digging into a character's head and showing the internal thoughts

Weaknesses?

Anything requiring a physical description 😂

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

If the POV character knows the language, I'll usually put it in italics w/ a note about which language it is, but if not, then I'll describe the other speakers' mannerisms/attitude as they speak

First fandom you wrote in?

Erm I think that might've been Warrior Cats, *way* back when I first discovered fic!

Favorite fic you've written?

Without a doubt, Supplementations and Upgrades! This is a fic inspired by a Tumblr post wondering what if BioWare *had* gone with the apparent original idea of the geth bringing Shephard back to life for ME2. I wrote the first chapter as a one-off with my Shephard, Rochelle (biotic ping pong ball of death), and then the idea just wouldn't leave me alone! Ended up being over 230k words and honestly it's my biggest project to date and the one I'm most proud of 😁 I constantly re-read it, and have commissioned art for various chapters from @defenestratin! (With plans for more bc I CANNOT get enough of how they draw Rochelle 😍)

I'm gonna tag........... @queerpeasantchic @systlin @inexplicifics and anyone else who wants to give it a shot 😁

[onlyjaeyun]

i'm the anon that said i was gonna binge read ch and it was WORTH THE WAIT 100%

you are one of my fav smau writers i love all of your works anytime you say you're working on one i'm SAT and patiently waiting

tbh you'll probably be able to figure out who i am because i spam liked and reblogged like EVERYTHING but whatever

you are such an amazing writer and honestly i never really know how to voice my thoughts to get across how literally spectacular someones work is but all i can say is i reread your works so often and a lot of them bring me so much comfort and put me at ease and i hope you never stop writing despite people being rude like that one anon that called you lazy (which is INSANE to me like ??? you wrote 50+ parts for it and finished it so quickly with it still being so well written??? like constructive criticism is one thing but just calling someone lazy is fuckin bonkers) because there are so many more people that appreciate your work and the time and effort that you put into it

i don't leave asks very often because i get anxious but i felt like i had to let you know how much i love and genuinely enjoy your works :)

sorry this was so fucking long but i hope it makes you happy!! 🥰🥰

oh bless your kind soul 🥺 thank you SO much. i cant even put my love and gratitude for readers like you in words and i'm honestly so happy snd relieved that you emjoy my writing so much. and the fact you guys always have my back means just as much to me. i love and appreciate you and your sweet heart so much and hope you have a wonderful day. 🥺🤍🌥️✨

[lennjamin-o7]

just found out about your wilbur war and honestly my first reaction was to be shocked bc your dialogue is like the best ive ever seen. like i can hear them so clearly and they all feel so,,,real? i fall in love with all the care you take for these guys! will add as well since im here that youre hands down my fav and best writer that ive come across so far. rereading your fics get me through the day no joke, hope you know how happy you make so many people! Hope you have a good rest of the week! Thank you for everything

Welcome to the Wilbur War, my friend! Your words make me breathe easier about Wilbur's characterization. I really don't want to ruin his character, it's so fun. Just an incredible struggle for me to write. I really really REALLY want to do the characters justice. ESPECIALLY in To Be Truly Free, because it is my baby.

And I am actually going to tear up from hearing you like my work so much. Honestly, I am so flustered and honored by that. It really makes it so much more fun to know that other people are enjoying what I write. I also hope that you have a great rest of your day. You deserve to have a good and happy life 💚💚💚💚💚

[evilwickedme]

What are some of your favorite books?

Sorry for taking so long to answer this when I asked for Qs on my birthday I really did expect something easier to answer

Anyway top books are the raven cycle and I've greatly enjoyed anything else of Stiefvater's I've read (except shiver), almost anything written by v e Schwab (notable exception is this savage song, I didn't even read the sequel) the night circus and the starless sea, the six of Crows duology, king killer chronicles (which sucks bc the third book is definitely never coming out) especially the slow regard of silent things, and I don't care what people say about how cringe it is the all for the game series is so important to me

I also love anything I've read by Diana Wynne Jones although I haven't read even a fraction of her writings - like uh eight or nine books I think? I have a few more I haven't read yet I'll hopefully get to soon but like I think she wrote like 30 or 40 books. Ella enchanted and the brothers lionheart are a couple of my childhood favs. The strange and beautiful sorrows of ava lavender is a book I read in like early hs that I thought I might've overhyped in my head but then I reread it a couple of years ago and it's SO GOOD. I listened to the entire murderbot diaries a few months ago, fucking delightful. The lies of locke lamora is so good. Spinning silver and uprooted are PEAK. I haven't finished the sequels yet but the fifth season is so fucking good if you've been afraid it's overrated it really is not. The Carls duology by hank green is also really good

Special mention to never contented things which is one of the books that affected me the most ever but I've never managed to reread and I honestly can't recommend it easy bc it's pretty dark but if you look up the trigger warnings and want to give it a short go ahead

For classics, pride and prejudice and emma are easily my favs. I love Emily Dickinson's poetry so much I dedicated my book to her (link in bio if you want to check it out 👀👀)

I have another ask waiting for me asking for my fav comics so I'll put that aside for now

I also really like listening to celebrity autobiographies and there's some rly mediocre ones but there's also ones I can't recommend enough. Obviously we've all heard of I'm glad my mom died, I think it was my top read of 2022 don't quote me on that tho I have shitty memory. Born with teeth by kate mulgrew is something truly special, I don't have the words honestly. Where am I now by mara wilson made me cry in public. I don't really read much nonfiction that isn't autobiographies (I'm working on it but it doesn't grab my attention as easily) but denial by deborah lipstadt is really good, I liveblogged reading that a few years ago

Obviously I've read and loved so many more books but I think this is so long as is! Yeah it's a hectic mix of many genres (fantasy scifi contemp romance poetry autobiographies adventure) and target age groups (all ages and ya and na and adult), but every single one of these is a genuine rec that I love. Thank you so much for asking!!

[notebookmusical]

Hi! I'm sorry I took a few days to reply. Omg I'm so sorry you don't have a voice right now! That sounds so awful. Just try to drink as much water as possible I guess and hopefully it gets better. I think baking is a lot easier for me too..just because I don't make that many cooking recipes or anything and it's harder to know what dishes to make. I also think it takes a lot longer and same here..everyone is better at it than me and never gives me enough time to learn or anything. But I definitely think it will be a New Year's resolution for me to work on it more and just try harder. I hope your voice has at least gotten a little better since I last replied to you and that you're feeling better overall. Hopefully you can start the new year healthy but I hope you feel better sooner than that haha. The only time I've ever lost my voice is at concerts. I remember after my Taylor show, my sister lost her voice and couldn't talk for three days..but I've never had laryngitis. Well I also enjoy apple pie and I'm a fan of most desserts actually.

I think I will be happy with any vault songs she gives us and some of those are familiar to me too. I'm not sure why she didn't release Let's Go (Battle) but I think Need could be put on rep eventually..even if we know it's for Lover, it almost sounds more like rep. But it also reminds me a little of False God too so I'm not sure. I think she will add Beautiful Eyes to debut honestly which would be good since I don't really listen to it. The holiday album I'm more iffy on but I guess it could come this year maybe? I think I heard a rumor about it so idk.

Well I think I might have been confusing that one with NFU cuz he says I just miss the way that we talk..but I agree that I should give it another listen. But I really liked that one, and Glitter and Honey. I'm sorry you couldn't make the concert..that's such a bummer. Btw Saw you in a Dream is one of my fav songs ever but I actually haven't heard many other songs..just a few besides her newest album and maybe her EP before that. I don't actually know what my vinyl player looks like because it's unopened so I have not played anything on it yet but I hope you find what you're looking for and get lucky.

I liked him and think he will do good in the role but only saw one clip so far which was Wait For Me. I will have to look for more. Ooh who is the euryidice stunt cast? I hadn't heard about it. I still haven't got a chance to watch the parade performances or any Dancing performances actually. The only thing I saw was Taylors tour choreographer talking about the Vigilante Shit chair dance which is cool. She is the same choreographer who worked on the La La Land movie so that's pretty cool and I love the dancing in that movie so maybe I will watch a few. I also like the dancers in the tour during Lover and Enchanted.

Well I guess one goal I have is to finish more books that I start lol. Then of course finish the ones I'm in the middle of right now which is going to be paired up with a few on the list. My sister wants to read more too and I have a few in mind we can read together already that we never got to..which is the ones about twins and also the Night Circus. We also started Daisy Jones together a long time ago. Read more books that I own and are on my shelf and I made the goal of reading two books a month so far so we'll see how that goes. Wow that also is the same number of the year which is 24! So hopefully I stick to that. I also said that this year and failed miserably lol. I think I only read two full books this year and maybe two I was in the middle of from the previous year lol. Or maybe I will try to finish one or two I'm in the middle of right now before the year ends. I do not know many upcoming releases yet but Emily Henry and Carly Fortune are definitely two I'm looking forward to and the If he had been with me sequel. So I am supposed to reread that with my sister maybe next month since it comes out in February I think. Or Night Circus and Starless Sea too..idk cuz maybe those will take more than a month though. If you have any other books you think we can read together this year let me know. There is also the Today Tonight Tomorrow sequel and I hope to read the first one as it gets closer. What are some upcoming ones you're looking forward to?

So the movie was good! Like it was a pretty good and faithful adaptation I think. But I also didn't love it as much as other people really seem to either. It felt like they changed a few little things from the book or maybe just cuz I speed read it..oops. Although I'm not sure if you would get it as much if you didn't read the book..like if it would be confusing. I filled in a few things for my sister for example. I feel like the narration in the book made things clearer that was hard to show in the movie. The performances were good though at least. I liked the songs but I need to listen to the soundtrack again. It did not feel like the kind of movie I would wanna watch again really and it was kinda long. In fact it just made me want to rewatch the Hunger Games again and those movies were a lot better. It's just my opinion though I guess. I do like all the edits I've been seeing or connections and reading people's analysis though. I think we are also going to see the Renaissance movie this weekend too and I will probably enjoy that more lol. Although I'm worried it looks more like a documentary of the tour than the full concert..which kinda sucks cuz we didn't get to go.

I know she's been working on it a lot so I guess I wonder what will happen. What genre would you hope for in her new music? I've always wanted her to try more rock honestly so it makes sense why I loved I Can See You so much. I know it might be about her breakup though so I'm not really sure. Red also had hints of rock like State of Grace which is another one of my top favorites so I still have some hope. I also wonder if the music she's working on now could be for her upcoming film too..which it seems like no one has considered. That's so awesome that you saw all of your faves live this year..omg! If I ended up going to Paramore..then I could have said the same haha. They are definitely going to be one of my top artists haha. So I got Say Don't Go right technically but I think that was the only one. I also forgot that she already sang Afterglow or else I wouldn't have guessed it. Yes omg! I think that was my favorite pairing of these shows but I would've been fine with Innocent and Now we don't Talk. I love Say Don't Go but dislike it's Time to Go lol. Now that she's resetting the surprise songs next year, it will be harder to guess..which also makes it more fun! She also says there's extended version of the movie for her bday but didn't mention Cardigan in that list. Also she just put You're Losing Me on streaming finally. Maybe I will finally appreciate this song more but its also kinda just there for me lol. I wish I liked it more. I think it's honestly one of my least favorites out of all the songs she has released this year so hopefully TS11 has better songs. I hope you feel better and continue to have a good week. Happy wonderful Wednesday!!! 🩷

hi friend !! it has been ... ten (?) days without a voice now, which is just very frustrating but i'm mostly still in good spirits! the one downside is that my friend is coming into town friday through sunday, and i'm worried i won't have a voice by then still. but i can't really do anything about that, so we'll see. might have to continue doing text to speech robot voice! it's her first time in seattle too which makes it all the more interesting! but yes, staying hydrated, sitting next to the humidifier and just hoping i'll feel better soon! i went back to my best friend, the doctor's, and he gave me some new medication yesterday so hopefully that'll do it's magic soon! i'm surprised that i didn't lose my voice from eras weekend at all, but i did from boston (although that one is more so because i got sick → got laryngitis). guess it also makes a huge difference that eras took place over the summer!

what's your favorite dessert? mine is a toss up between black forest cake (what my mom makes for my birthday every year), tiramisu, and chocolate cake! but i also love oatmeal raisin cookies (probably my personal favorite thing to bake). my mom's also really good at baking bread, and i definitely need to pay more attention to her little tips and tricks when she does!

oh i could see the false god/need comparison! two of my close friends really want need to be released, and i hope it is for their sakes! i would loveeee the holiday album to come soon but i feel like it might be a "end of tour" gift next year? maybe? if tour is even over by then?

i was listening to i miss you already + i haven't left yet on vinyl yesterday as i worked! was thinking of you 🤍 i do think i still like his debut album more than i miss you already, but i also have listened to that one more/longer/etc. so maybe it's just recency bias! i feel like i'm starting to get burnt out (?) on new music? if that makes sense. but i'm also really excited for the holly/MUNA into your room, and then noah kahan/gracie abrams everything everywhere remixes that come out this week! but i think that's different since it's not new new music? i've been listening to fruitcake ep by sabrina carpenter a lot though! that one's really fun. saw you in a dream is soooo good and i also really like f a r a w a y ! but sunshine baby is definitely my favorite.

i heard rumors about lizzy mcalpine as eurydice? which i don't know how to feel about! for many reasons! here's an audioboot, if you're so inclined! i did see that quote and i thought that was really cool! i'm really excited that eras movie will be on streaming; i've got like ~ $25 amazon digital credits saved up, so i'm going to be streaming it on her birthday i think! just a little something fun! i notice new things every time, and i like picking a dancer — or two — to focus on! i would love to see a a BTS documentary of eras after it's done; i'm so curious about the quick changes, the rehearsal process, etc.

two books is still two more than you previously read! it's not a competition, and reading is supposed to be fun!! i almost started a new book tonight but i was too tired and then i remembered i haven't replied to you yet so i grabbed my laptop to do so! i think i'm going to try to work more on my les mis/night circus annotations tomorrow, and that'll probably be the last time i get to read until sunday or monday! i also need to update my reading thread — and make my 2024 reading tracker in google sheets! so much to do! i usually do a post on my book blog for 2024 anticipated releases, but i'm SO out of it that i can't even think of anything aside from my friends' books that are coming out!

i've never seen the hunger games movies aside from the first one, but i think what i want to do is do a series reread, watch the movies, read tbosas, then see it? maybe? or maybe read them all then watch them all? i have no idea! but all my friends have been talking to me about it and i have to be like WAIT I HAVEN'T READ IT YET DON'T SAY ANYTHING !!! it definitely has taken over my entire fyp, and i'm always in awe of how good people's editing skills are! i hope it's the full concert; you'll have to let me know how it is since i won't be seeing it for a while (if i end up seeing it)!!

i'm also not the biggest fan of it's time to go! i love the "but i've got me" line and think it's so symbolic of how this entire tour has been for her, and hearing her sing it live has definitely made me like it a bit more but i'm still not the biggest fan of it for some reason! out of all the surprise song combos in 2023, which one was your favorite? i wonder if cardigan will be on the streaming version, or in a physical DVD exclusive? we'll just have to wait and see! feels weird for her to exclude just cardigan. i did not expect her to release YLM today! i woke up and my phone was blowing up from friends about it haha! i do like it more with you know, proper production, dolby atmos, etc. and not ripped from an audio somewhere, but it's definitely not my favorite!

hope you have a good rest of your week!! 🤍 are you doing anything fun this weekend/anything you're looking forward to in december? love you!

[minkiverse]

POLY!ATEEZ FIC RECS PART 1

Part 2 - Kim Hongjoong - Park Seonghwa - Jeong Yunho - Kang Yeosang - Choi San - Song Mingi - Jung Wooyoung - Choi Jongho

A collection of Ateez fics that I think everyone should know about!!! This has been QUITE the project, but I'm so happy to have done it. Unfortunately not all my recs could fit on one post so there will be at least one other part to this list, as well as individual member lists. (i really thought i could fit them all on one post lmaooo) I hope you enjoy and support these authors!!

DISCLAIMER none of these works are mine and majority are MATURE 18+, please review all warnings before reading!!!

Key:

✨ - My Favs

🔥 - Smut (MINORS DNI)

⛈️ - Angst

💗 - Fluff

🍑 - Humor

POLY!ATEEZ

Sway With Me - @luvt0kki 🔥⛈️ Sci-fi ✧ Ongoing

the world 🤌 the story 🤌 the SMUT 🤌🤌🤌 but truly this fic is such a fun take on a sci-fi adventure. im already obsessed with the mc, AND HER AND WOO'S CHEMISTRY?!?! off the charts sooooo good like 👏👏👏 the interlude has me a tiny bit nervous because now i know how well this author writes angst and yeah its gonna be a doozy 😩😩

Wonderwall - @atzfilm ✨🔥⛈️ Yandere ✧ Faerie AU ✧ Ongoing

i realized pretty quickly that yandere is much more popular in this fandom than in previous ones i've been in, so i never really read any. HOWEVER, i get it now i do lmao. this was the first one i read, and i was HOOKED like i couldn't stop reading! the story just like took over my brain, and i am thinking why am i sympathizing with the guys BUT I AM BECAUSE THEY ARE COMPLEX AND SO INTERESTING AND WELL WRITTEN!!!!! its hard to put into words how much i love this series

The Answer - @berryunho ✨🔥⛈️ Cult AU ✧ Ongoing

i genuinely don't think i've ever read a fic like this, and i mean that in literally the best way possible. i was STRESSED reading this like there are so many scenes that make me question everything, but like there is no one to trust about what is actually happening. idk if i'm making sense but this fic just needs to be read to understand the legit anxiety it gives me in certain chapters lmaooo😭😭

Deep Down - @seventhcallisto 🔥⛈️💗 ABO AU ✧ 9th Member AU ✧ Ongoing

this is just self indulgent fun AND THAT PEOPLE IS WHAT FANFICTION IS MEANT TO BE!!! like im just kicking my feet reading about this 9th member ateez finding out she's an omega!~ i'm having the TIME OF MY LIFE!

Into the Aurora - @honeyhotteoks ✨🔥⛈️💗 Idol AU ✧ Complete

this soooo quickly became my main comfort fic for ateez! like i have reread this TOO many times. sometimes i'll just revisit specific chapters, but i know the exact chapter number.... is that concerning? lmaooo~ but truly this is more than just a you date every member of ateez fic (WHICH ARE GREAT DONT GET IT TWISTED!!) but the more we learn of the mc the more i adore her and her relationship with the boys!! it's just a must read ok 👏👏

Inception - @remedyx ✨🔥⛈️💗 Dragon!Teez ✧ Royalty AU ✧ Ongoing

my brain is still stuck in this world tbh, like its maybe a bit embarrassing how many times i look at the map and moodboards and just vibe and think about this fic lmaoo! but honestly the world building is so thoughtful and its so easy to just immerse yourself in it which is amazing!!!!!!!

Dragon from the Window - @thelargefrye ✨🔥⛈️💗 Dragon!Teez ✧ Fantasy AU ✧ Ongoing

this collection of one shots, drabbles, headcanons, and world building i went through SO QUICKLY I WAS IMMEDIATLY OBSESSED. i am so genuinely invested in this story and how each member react to their connection with the mc!!!! ALSO the mc is a witch SO BIG BONUS POINTS!!!!~

like the moon - @sunmoonjune ✨⛈️💗 Warrior AU ✧ Clan Systems ✧ Ongoing

try not to cry challenge - FAILED, MULTIPLE TIMES 😭😭 this is major hurt/comfort, but its truly such a beautiful story!! i would do anything ANYTHING for gray!!!!! all of them deserve the absolute best in the world and i just adore them so much 🥹🥹🥹

Morning Mist - @mint-yooxgi ⛈️💗 Dragon!Teez ✧ Yandere ✧ Ongoing

another story with an mc that is just 🤌🤌🤌 like she is so badass i'm in love but also scared lmao,, but i think if you are new to yandere, this is a good starting point! like yes they are obsessed but not like terrifyingly so if that makes sense~

MULTIPLE MEMBERS

This Night Together - @honeyhotteoks ✨🔥⛈️💗 Yunho x Reader x Mingi ✧ ABO ✧ Ongoing

listen i'm a bit of a slut for ABO fics and this one!!!! THIS ONE IS SO FUCKING GOOD!!!!!!!!! im like just in love with all of them not just yungi n reader but EVERYONE (except u minseok u bitch) like not only is the main plot so good but the side plots for the other members is just incredible,, i just love this story too ok if you see this author know that every fic they write is going to be a comfort fic for me 🥹🥹

Project Omen - @atzfilm 🔥⛈️ Hongjoong x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Hybrid AU ✧ One Shot

Bouncy - @hongism 🔥Yunho x Reader x Jongho ✧ Mechanic AU ✧ One Shot

splish splash - @atozfic 🔥San x Seonghwa x Wooyoung x Yunho x Reader ✧ Swimmer AU ✧ One Shot

sharing is caring? - @byuntrash101 🔥Hongjoong x Reader x Mingi ✧ Idol AU ✧ One Shot

Untitled - @orgverse 🔥Seonghwa x Reader x San ✧ Idol AU ✧ One Shot

Untitled - @cheollipop 🔥San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ One Shot

Threesome with Yungi with woosan watching - @k-hotchoisan 🔥Yunho x Reader x Mingi (San and Wooyoung) ✧ One Shot

one more rep - @cheollipop 🔥San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Personal Trainer AU ✧ One Shot

blue bird - @seonghwaddict 🔥💗San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Mafia AU ✧ One Shot

What's the Time, Mr. Wolf - @starlitmark 🔥Yunho x Reader x Mingi ✧ Hybrid AU ✧ One Shot

the good friend + the better friend - @byuntrash101 ✨🔥San x Reader x Mingi ✧ Idol AU ✧ Two Shot

as a sangi bias this fic changed my life maybe?!! the smut is just toe curling ESPECIALLY PART TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!! literally i could drool just thinking about this fic 🤤🤤 i need this to be my reality ASAP

Untitled - @ja3hwa 🔥Seonghwa x Yunho x Mingi x Reader ✧ Business (?) AU ✧ One Shot

knockout - @igbylicious 🔥San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Boxer AU ✧ One Shot

Untitled - @sanspuppet 🔥Hongjoong x Reader x Seonghwa ✧ One Shot

Untitled - @thetypingpup 🔥San x Reader x Mingi ✧ One Shot

Time of Love - @desayunho ⛈️💗 San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ SMAU ✧ Complete

compromise - @cyberpxnk 🔥⛈️ Seonghwa x Reader x Yunho ✧ College AU ✧ Soccer AU ✧ One Shot

Untitled - @cheollipop 🔥San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ One Shot

cheerleader - @byuntrash101 🔥Seonghwa x Yunho x San x Ming x Reader ✧ One Shot

from eden + Pt. 2 - @atzfilm 🔥⛈️ Seonghwa x Reader x Yeosang ✧ Vampire AU ✧ Two Shot

whichever way - @igbylicious 🔥💗 San x Reader x Wooyoung ✧ Neighbors AU ✧ Ongoing

Under the Comforter - @thelargefrye 🔥Seonghwa x Reader x San ✧ Idol AU ✧ One Shot

Double Trouble - @kitten4sannie 🔥 Wooyoung x Reader x Jongho ✧ Hybrid AU ✧ One Shot

What Should We Become? - @sluttywoozi 🔥💗 Yeosang x Reader x San ✧ One Shot

like a dream - @cheollipop ✨🔥💗 Yunho x Reader x Mingi ✧ One Shot

this is like so incredibly hot, literally all i need in life is to be in between these two men 😩😩😩 but it is also so sweet and both boys are so doting to the mc and the end!!!!!!!!!! so loving and cute and aaaaaaaaaaaa 😭😭😭

SCENARIOS/TEXTS/HEADCANONS

ateez as royals who fall for you (hyungs, maknaes) - @eightmakesonebraincell 🔥⛈️💗 Royalty AU ✧ Scenarios

subby ateez - @seventhcallisto 🔥Headcanons

Ateez cumming too soon - @sluttywonwoo 🔥Headcanons

soft cuddles with ateez - @beenbaanbuun 💗 Scenarios

first kiss with ateez - @beenbaanbuun 💗 Scenarios

Ateez and pussy slapping - @kitten4sannie 🔥Scenarios

Bedroom Mishaps (hyungs, maknaes) - @seohwang 🔥💗 Scenarios

Ateez 'n free use - @seventhcallisto 🔥 Scenarios

Cupping their Cheeks - @yeorisanaxox 💗 Scenarios

Ateez as Exes + Pt. 2 - @kisshwa 🍑 Texts

Friends to Lovers Headcanons - @kpopnstarwars 💗 Scenario

boyfriend!ateez discovering you write smut - @eightmakesonebraincell 🍑 Texts

Ateez being overstimulated (hyungs, maknaes) - @ateezscupid ✨🔥 Scenarios

listen i just like sub!ateez a lot 😭😭 but like these are such a go too for me when i NEED some dom!reader content like it is so cute/hot/toe curlingly delicious 🤤🤤🤤

mtl of who would like choking - @sxcret-garden 🔥 Headcanons

texts when they think you’re asleep - @beenbaanbuun 💗🍑 Texts

[toruro]

ughdiughjdsk HELP ME. gna go insane under the cut :3

thea omg i was just raving abt ur jihoon fic and then i read this one and ... I AM BLOWN AWAY arrghd waiting patiently for u to come out w more bangers (will be stalking ur masterlist until then) bc WFT! I LOVE THE WAY U WRITE! today i actually had the time to sit down and screenshot my fav parts so we are going to be dissecting everything rn hehe

first of all idk why but this whole series of thoughts was just very funny 2 me and flowers super duper well! the little thing abt ethics committee made me bc i was like! oh right! she works in humanities! at a uni! it makes sense! idk i just love how reader's world is rly fleshed out and it's so fun:

this line made me SCREAM. why is this so mingyu why can i exactly imagine him saying this:

reader is so real and i love how u include this thought process! like she's very realistic and it's so nice to see her think things out so thouroughly:

ah yes. the very, very big problem that is dilf gyu

nooo bc why did u do my beloved chan like that:

he's such a little shit it's so funny and i love him:

OKAY THE WORDING HERE IS JUST. AMAZING LIKE i can feel reader's raw emotions and how exposed it all feels i love it:

the image this painted into my head is not good for my health:

again phenomenal wording like i can't get over it! reread this part so many times because it's just so well done i'm actually crazy:

as always i don't break down the smut bc that sends me into a frenzy and it is 2 hot and i have to be up 2 early tmrw to be losing my sanity tonight ... i will say though that it was *amazing* like i love how u write w the two of them being equally obsessed w each other bc i feel like the whole scene means so much more when they're disgustingly in love lol I AM A HOPELESS ROMANTIC IF U COULD NOT TELL

again ... i keep saying this but just the way u write is super satisfying to me ... like i swear u just have a way w words bc i love the different ways you move the plot, progress time, and it all flows super well while always changing it up and making it super engaging! i'm not describing this very well but! i know u said u make a lot of these choices w out thinking so honestly kudos to u bc the stylistic choices in ur writing are just so. like idk THEY;RE SO WELL DONE AND FUN TO READ I LOVE IT SO MUCH! rly rly enjoyed this :3 keep up the good work thea

IS THIS TOO MUCH?

When Mingyu helps you up with your boxes, you don't think too much of it, really, but when he shows up in the hall with a kid in his arms - something changes.

✦ KIM MINGYU - f!reader

✦ Genre: neighboors-to-lovers, daddy!Mingyu (slightly), angsty (slighlty), smut (minors don't interact), a little bit of health problems, oral sex (f! receiving), unprotected sex (don't do this at home), reader has a few insecurities so keep that Mingyu.

✦ word count: 11k+

✦ Title inspired by Carly Ra Jepsen - Too much.

✦ Thea note: Mingyu is so boyfriend coded I want to punch a wall, lately been thinking about daddy!mingyu a lot and how that would look like, but also Mingyu is not an easy character I swear this was a struggle, but here it is - and of course, it has a pussy drunk mingyu scene. Also thanks again @ni-aaaaaaa for helping me with this one 🫶

Moving is hard. Moving places is hard. Moving places almost across the country is harder.

So here you are - struggling to hold the elevator and a load boxes, but then he arrives - a knight in shiny armor or just a fit guy in gym clothes and sweats.

"Do you need help with that?" he asks pointing to the boxes.

"Hi, hm -" You start, and you want to be the crazy strong independent lady who doesn't need help, you listened to Destiny Child for fuck sake, you can pay your bills and load your boxes on the goddamn elevator, but you are so freaking tired. It's the second round of boxes and you will probably need to do more and drive to hand over the moving truck, but all you need and truly want is to take a shower, get rid of the sweat, and lay down with arms and legs open on your bed like you are a starfish. But then you remember, did you pack the body soap in the backpack? Suitcase? Boxes n 03 with bathroom-related things? And the bed sheets? Fuck.

"Do you have more or?" The nice guy with strong arms and gym clothes asks already lifting the three boxes at once, putting them in the elevator and stepping in the elevator door and letting you in.

"I have a few more in the truck but-" You click on the fourth floor button.

"Oh" He says pointing at the button and at you. "We’re neighbors, nice. You’re probably in the Mrs Smith apartment, right? Lovely lady, it was nice that her daughter took her in after she moved." The guy continues and you don't quite follow but hey, he is already unloading and leaving the boxes at the 03 door so you gonna take all the help. "Do you want to put them in or do you want to pick up the other boxes on the truck?"

"You don't actually need to-" You ask trying to be a polite neighbor and not a pushover, but Mr. Nice Guy and nice arms cuts you off.

"Oh don't worry, I didn't do back or arms today, if I don't need to squat too much it's alright" He says, big smile gracing his face as he tilts his head and, oh god ,he is quite hot and he is just so nice and big all over and you’re way too tired so you don't want to take the last few boxes and do a fourth trip to the garage when you can do just two - maybe one if the nice guy with big arms lift more than you think in his everyday trip to the gym. So, you just accept, because he could do what your noodles arms could never: lift more the two boxes at once.

"Look,” You say tidying the boxes near your door because you are a good neighbor and you don't want someone to trip in the hall because of you. "I'm very grateful, and I drove for like, more than ten hours, so I'm taking all the help I can get. And I don't know your diet but I'm so buying pizza after this so if you want you can joy. Like paying for all your service with a half of pizza."

So that's how you end up with nice-guy-strong-arms-buff-chest in your new apartment and learn that his name is actually Kim Mingyu and that he’s a software engineer and that he mainly goes to the gym to see people otherwise he would not get out of the house because he works remotely. So you also give your resume-of-life talk that you worked on rehearsing in that ten hour drive - needed to change cities because working on research isn't easy, new PhD in town, works on gender studies, and has a side hustle with a nonprofit.

"Oh, so you are smart smart,” Mingyu replied with a mouth full of pizza, trying to wash it down with coke.

"Nah,” You reply in the same situation. "Dumb enough to go into humanities actually.”

"Hey! That's nothing wrong with humanities," He says. "Once I wanted to be an archeologist - that goes into humanities, right?"

"I don't really know, probably?"

And you and Mingyu guy don't really turn into friends per se - and that's mainly your fault. He’s easy going and always talks to you in the elevator or hall when you’re going to the university and he’s going to the gym. He tells you to knock on his door for a movie, tells you that you both can go to a coffee shop nearby, and tells you that he knows nice restaurants, but you never quite follow his ideas.

You could say that it was because of your routine.  Kind of excruciating; you had a few classes to actually teach, research to plan and execute, and because you were the new one in the department, all the extra winter and summer courses to plan and teach was your obligation. Yey new job!

But the actual reason is that, yes, you are overloaded with your new job, and with the new city, and with new everything. So, when Mingyu asks you just can't bring yourself to actually do it. Part of you thinks he is just being nice, just trying to be friendly, he does have that kinda puppy energy going around him - too big, too excited, too much all over the place and knocking into everything. But part of you is scared that Mingyu nice-guy-all-over might be trying something with you that you can't actually handle right now. 

Because sometimes you catch how Mingyu looks at you - eyes lingering.. And God, this works wonders to your self-esteem. Once, when you actually wore your gym clothes and he was in his jeans for a change, you could see him visibly gulping on the hallway. He asked why he never saw you at his gym, you answered the only way possible, you don't go to the gym, you are one of the runs at the park lunatics, and he said it was a pity really, maybe he can start running and going to the park.

Or that time when you had to go to a nice dinner - fundraising and meeting people was the worst part of the job, but hey, you needed the money and the funds to go around interviewing women in politics across the country, so you put the nicest black dress you had and a pair of high heels. And when you leave the house, you scream to the person in the elevator to wait and do the silliest run in those shoes and it was Mingyu – dressed joggers and hair ruffled, contrasting to your polished appearance. "Hot date?" he asked in a small voice head tilting to look at you because even with your highest heels, he was still taller. "I wish, work, and you?" You answered. "Bad day.  Gonna pick up some beer." And you left the elevator just to see Mingyu ogling at your ass and getting flustered because of it.

So maybe when he asked you out you always brushed over, never actually said no. But you never said yes either. Because even though you were actually trying to handle all the other things in your life and a relationship did fall into the 'not-now-category' or in the 'probably-will-make-me-insane', you liked having Mingyu there, in the back of your mind, filling up your fantasies and what-ifs. It may be a bitch move, but it was what you could handle right now, because really, handling the new job, in a new city, basically friendless, and almost crying at your kitchen table, because one of the students needed a week extension and that alone was almost driving you insane. 

So having Mingyu on the back of your mind was the only thing you could handle right now. Mingyu and his big hands, strong arms and his nice fucking smile, and oh god, he did smell good. Your mind could - and would - wonder when you both got together on that dumb elevator and how you want to climb him like a goddamn tree. And sometimes you let your mind wander and think how everything would go if you said yes. If you went to a nice restaurant, what would happen? Would everything go smoothly and you end up on his sheets? Or yours? How would it feel having Mingyu in your bed? You have all the questions and none of the answers.

So, when you see Mingyu with a mini-Mingyu at his side, arms full of bags, and struggling to close his kid’s coat, you get a little mind blown. You think a little and Mingyu never actually talked about having a son or a daughter you couldn't really tell, and then you blame yourself maybe he didn’t say anything because you never said yes. You never went to the nice restaurant or the coffee shop. And then it fucks you up a bit, because what else do you not know about him - maybe silly things like what is his favorite food? What movies does he like? What in his binge-watch list?

Did Mingyu get married? He’s probably divorced - you think - because you never saw that kid before so mini-Mingyu didn’t live with Big-Mingyu, and also you never saw a woman and you think that if Mingyu was married he would not be looking at your ass in every step of the way down to the garage - or at least you hope not. Oh god, you don’t want to be a homewrecker, but then again, Mingyu doesn’t look like the guy who would do that: hit on you if he was in a relationship. Then it dawns on you, maybe, maybe he was just being friendly.

Right?  

But when Mingyu picks mini-Mingyu in his arms, still with too many bags and gives you a big, warm smile, you almost freeze.

“Hey,” He says clicking the elevator’s button. “Going to the Uni?” He asks as you go to his side, Mini-Gyu’s big eyes on your face - so you just give the little kid your best smile.

“Yep, one professor is out of town so I have a few extra classes this week to teach the kids the joy of classical sociology,” You say eyes leaving Mini-Gyu and actually going to Big-Gyu, and your mind gets fucked up a bit, because one, how do genes work? That kid is actually Mingyu's carbon copy and of course, you have not stepped in biology classes in a few years - but you are pretty sure that cloning is not yet allowed - maybe you should check it out in the ethics committee or something. Maybe Mingyu is committing some kind of crime.

“Nice,” And Mingyu finally looks at the kid who is still staring at you. “This is Minseok.” He says kind of rocking the kid up and down trying to adjust the begs on his shoulder. “Minseok and I are going to the park for a picnic date, aren't we, Minseok?” But Minseok doesn't actually answer, Minseok just hides his face on Mingyu’s shoulder, looking a little shy and you smile because he looks like he just got caught staring.

“Do you need help or?” You ask seeing how Mingyu continues to struggle.

“Nah, this little guy will just walk. He is just being shy he doesn’t know how to act in front of pretty girls,” And you can actually feel the pink in your cheeks and now you quite understand Minseok and the urge to hide. And maybe, maybe Mingyu is hitting on you in every damn elevator trip.

"Poor baby," You coo and you can actually see Mingyu's legs giving up a little and picking himself up. Minseok looks at you, hand closed in your direction, you give him an open palm and he shyly drops a little sticker. "Oh! Thank you very much," You say hand closing against your chest, analyzing the little Pikachu sticker.

"Oh god, I'm raising a womanizer," Mingyu says ruffling the kid’s hair. "Did you already feel in love with noona?" Mingyu asks Minseok and strokes his pink cheeks with his massive hands. You actually can't figure out Minseok's age, is he tiny? Or it is Mingyu that is bigger than the average person?

"I'm old enough to be his auntie, Mingyu." You say actually putting the little sticker in your bag. And for once you are the one that holds the elevator door for Mingyu and the scene looks so domestic that makes your heart clench a bit. You don’t even want a kid, you don’t even know if you are ready for it, but why does Mingyu with little Minseok in his arms make you feel jealous? Jealous of the person that you don’t even know, someone who doesn’t even have a face in your imagination.

"Nah, pretty girls are always noona," Mingyu says and you can feel how your cheeks are turning pink because you feel them hot.. "Anyway, good luck with the classes. We would actually invite you over for our little picnic date but I guess you’re a busy girl."

"You know the real professor is always on my ass, Mingyu." You say heading towards your car.

"Well," Mingyu says finally letting Minseok on the floor, Minseok’s hands tiny on Mingyu's and your heart kinda swells because it is a heart warming picture really. Because you know Mingyu is a fine ass man, with a nice personality paired with a mindblowing body, and he just looks like such a father with Minseok on his hand, well it didn't help that Minseok was the cutest kid you ever laid your eyes on, even though he looked a little shy, a little sad. "You know I am always free, so you can hit me up anytime."

So, when you are talking about how Marx and Weber see the society and the conflicts in it you can't quite stop thinking about Mingyu and Minseok and you could actually cry.

Cry, because you somehow, even with all that Mingyu said to you and all the little flirtatious jabs going on you feel like you lost an opportunity. But at the same time, you want to cry because the relationship gets more complicated if a child is evolved. You may be a bitch over the fact that maybe you lead Mingyu on without actually saying no, but a child? You can't lead a child on, you can’t just kiss-kiss peck-peck your neighbor and say hi to Minseok, or even worse, you can’t start a relationship with Kim Mingyu and then break up with Kim Mingyu after being involved in Minseok’s life. You can’t picture going every weekend to the park and then just vanishing because your life is too busy and the relationship doesn’t quite work. You think that you may be a bitch and break Mingyu’s heart - even though you don't think he’s crazy in love with you to you actually break his heart, but you couldn’t break Minseok because his big eyes and small pout is too cute.

And you want to cry because Mingyu is hot. You noticed that when he picked your boxes and his arms bulged against his sleeve. You have eyes so you can see, every time you see him really, or going to the gym, or in his lounge clothes, or when he is a little bit tidy but still in not formal clothes, you stop a little and you think you never actually saw Mingyu going on a date, or in formal wear. And now it makes sense: having a kid doesn’t actually make dating easier.

But now you see another side of him. Mingyu is endearing, he is cute and you suspect that he could treat you well. He looks reliable, he has a good job, and he is a nice guy. But all that went to a new level when he had a kid in his arms, it made you twitch a little. The way that he looks at the kid in his arms makes your heart inflate like a damn balloon and makes you think about all the other things that you don't know about Mingyu, all the little secrets, all the gaps in his personality.

And oh damn. You had a new problem on your hands. Cute dilf Mingyu was the problem.

So, when you and Mingyu see each other in the hall, you breathe deeply. Afraid to say you are a little relieved when Mingyu is kid-less, but still hot in his gym clothes.

"Park today?" Mingyu asks with a gym bag in his hand.

"Yeah, I'm almost near my 10km mark so I'm pushing it a little bit." You say self-conscious tugging on your clothes, fixing your leggings and top. Fuck, maybe you should've put that baggy shirt on. Why the hell you got out of the house looking like a crazy lady without even brushing your hair? Ok, you said to yourself that the run was the last thing before washing your hair and putting a mask on it, but still, you knew that Mingyu was always in the hall.

"Nice. I heard about the run, right? Some people at my gym are going." Mingyu says eyes still on you, making you twitch. And you know is not Mingyu’s fault.  He;’s always like that - he looks at you, pays attention, not even once you felt like you were not being heard when you were talking to him, not even when you were bitching because someone left the trashcan open.

"Oh god no, I'm not even close to the run’s entry level." You say tongue itching against your mouth. Mingyu has that quality really, he makes you curious and he makes you bold and afraid at the same time. But even if your mind says no, you still go for it. "So, no Minseok today?"

"Ah," Mingyu scratches his neck, almost shy, almost. "No, he is with his mom, the little guy was sick and had a few days off so no school for him, that's why he was so shy he was actually moody, but he liked you enough to give you his treasured Pikachu sticker."

"Oh yes." You actually pick up your phone and show Mingyu, and you feel a little silly but every time you see the Pikachu behind it makes you smile. "It’s not a sticker anymore, it evolved in the lucky charm category."

"Oh" Mingyu says looking at you and at your phone with an endearing look on his face that you couldn't quite puzzle. "That's actually cute."

"I mean," you shrug.

"Well, I gonna tell him that you treasure his Pikachu. It's not like he doesn’t already have a big crush on you." Mingyu teases looking at you like he wants to see every little reaction, like he wants to put the puzzle of you together like every detail matters.

"Stop, he was just being cute and polite you should be proud." You shove Mingyu but he doesn't even bulge. Damn, he was strong.

"Oh I am, but that's not polite, that's his love language, he even talked about you to his mom." Mingyu says eyes still on you, and you think for a second how funny it is, that he actually makes you feel this way, make you feel opposite worlds at the same time, makes you want to run and hide but and makes you want to stretch and bath of every ray of attention he gives you. "And he calls you elevator noona."

"Nooooooo," you say feeling pretty good that you stole the kid's heart in one elevator trip, Minseok was easier to win over than Mingyu.

"Yeeeees," Mingyu mocks you, and again he looks shy but Mingyu is not a shy person so that makes you think, makes you ponder. "Actually, he is going to be around for a few days so if you want to go to the park or-"

"Are you free today?" You ask, and you can see Mingyu's eyes bulge, his face making sure that you know that he is not understanding what you meant.

"Hun?" He says, head moving almost like a dog.

"Today, are you free? I mean I know that you are going to the gym, but we can go to that coffee shop you said and just chat a little." When the elevator stops, Mingyu, like always holding the door for you.

"Oh, hm-" He looks at his bag, then at the elevator door closing, then at you.

"Don't worry,” You say trying to soothe him, hands gesturing and all. “It was dumb to ask when I know you have plans, we can rain-check it."

"No, no, just-" Mingyu start to pat himself searching for his phone, chest, then front pocket, then back pockets, then looking at his bag. "Let me just call Chan and tell him I'm not going to the gym."

"Noooo," You feel so silly that you almost stomp your feet on the ground like a child. "You can go, we can just meet up or rain-check it, don't worry, you always understand when I'm too busy so-"

"Noooo," He copies you. "I’ll tell Chan that I'm doing cardio today," He starts typing on his phone. "I’m doing so much cardio in the park, running is the best exercise ever."

“Now, you’re just mocking me,” You say trying to push him again but this time he pretends you are strong enough to make him move.

“Nah, not doing anything.”

Mingyu doesn't make a big deal of changing plans - which is so weird to you, a planner and an avid checker of to do-lists. The only detour he needs is to stop at his car because he can't run with his gym bag. And that's how you end up running with Mingyu, and even though you have a good pace, Mingyu's legs are just way too big, so you always end up getting a little behind.

And again, Mingyu is so caring and nice that sometimes he dashes off but when he sees you are not following his pace he stops a bit, running in place waiting for you with a big smile. Damn, you are fucked because you feel like every time Mingyu smiles, a halo of sunshine forms against his figure. You knew he was pretty, you knew he was handsome, and you knew he was hot, but now you know that he may be mother's nature favorite and that is just unfair.

Mingyu has long legs, but you have endurance, so when he is almost dying you are good to go - maybe not so good, but you can keep going for a few more kilometers.

"See you could totally go for the run. You can take a lot more than I do." Mingyu says panting, hand on his waist, bending over.

"Nah, that would make running serious and with a goal, that ruins the fun." You say fixing your hair, tying it in a high ponytail again.

"Sometimes I wonder how your mind works," Mingyu says, seriously, making you stop in your tracks, making your head tilt, and actually look at Mingyu who looks like he is trying to puzzle you. "You say things like that and the way you think is so-" He trails off again, looking at his feet, then at everything but you. "The way you think gives me a new perspective on things."

And you could almost cry. Because at the same time, you feel so seen yet vulnerable. You feel more naked than when you are actually naked with some random guy. And you breath so deeply, because sometimes you run laps just to keep things hidden, you go through mental gymnastics trying to keep things under the rug. And it clicks in your head. Maybe that's why you avoid Mingyu, that's why you always say no because to him, you are so easy to read that actually scares you. So, you do the best you can, avoid.

"Ok Mingyu, you called me weird and now you are paying for coffee," you say storming off in front of him.

"I did not call you weird, don't put words in my mouth," He grins, again next to you because of his long legs. You almost think about kicking him in the shin and storming off. "What I am saying is that we are very, very different."

"And that's a bad thing?" You ask self-conscious, feeling your body actually shrink.

"It's not bad, it's different," Mingyu says opening up the door for you. "We think differently, that's all."

"A latte please and a-" You ask Mingyu.

"A latte and an Americano," Mingyu says.

So, you both get your drinks and sit on a pretty outside table per your request. The weather is good enough for it.

"That's what I am talking about," Mingyu says with a sip. "When I am all sweat what I want is to just be inside with the AC on, you prefer to sit outside."

"I'm sweat I feel sticky in the AC." You shrug.

"You see, I feel sticky outside," he responds.

"Do you want to go inside we can-" you say already picking up your drink and getting up when you feel Mingyu's hand on your arm.

"What I am saying is that we are different." Mingyu gives you a soothing smile. "I am data-driven, you lean towards contexts. I need goals, clear goals, otherwise, I feel unmotivated, but you feel like goals take away the fun. We are different and that's nothing wrong with that, so maybe that's why I feel so interested in you."

"I'm not that interesting," you say, taking only a sip to buy more time. Actually, I'm boring."

"See, you can't take a compliment either! I love compliments, just could play a 24h audio just praising me." Mingyu says shamelessly, making you laugh.

"Yeah, I'm not good on that but I'm serious. Like, there’s not much going on here." You say pointing to yourself.

"Oh, like the poets said, if you could see yourself though my eyes," Mingyu says making you blush and look away.

"Don't say things like that." You complain, pouting like a kid.

"Oh, come on," Mingyu’s smile is big, and you see that he’s enjoying making you shy, making you embarrassed. "It's not like it’s not clear that I'm into you, I even asked you out and you were the one that dumped me."

"I didn't dump you," You say almost kicking his shin below the desk, not because you want to but because you almost had a Pavlovian reaction. "I never said no and I'm truly busy."

"Not saying no is not the same as saying yes. I know that I'm being a little pushover, but I am a simple guy. I don't see why hide that I’m into you or find you hot and interesting. And I know that you know that, and I also know that you are not into me so" He shrugs. "It's not a big deal really."

"I-" You start but you almost freeze. "Fuck, I'm so bad at this," You say to Mingyu giving him your best I'm So Sorry Smile "Look I'm not good at this, I don't flirt, and honestly small talk almost kills me. And I gonna sound like such a bitch, but it's me it's not you?" You say again giving Mingyu that smile, searching for any trace of reaction on his face "You are a nice guy and you are funny, and god you are so good looking like almost unreal good looking -" And you laugh because Mingyu is liking the shower of praises, he is enjoying every step of the way like he said he did. "But, I feel like I'm not that ready, all the changes is making me freak out and it is making me so unsure and I need time to put myself up, and I can’t ask for you to wait-"

"Oh, I’m so waiting," Mingyu says, leaning on the chair, crossing his legs and arms and looking so smug.

"I cannot ask you for that because I don't even know when I will feel ready and-" You continue, behaving like Mingyu didn't say a thing.

"Once a week," He says still looking smug it makes you stop in your tracks.

“Huh?”

"Once a week, we can see each other once a week. It can be a date in a nice restaurant, it can be run, it can be a trip to the market, anything really, just-" Mingyu breathes changing positions, and taking a sip of his coffee. "If you don't feel ready or don’t want me like that I will understand and if doesn't work out at least we can be friends, like you said I’m a nice guy."

And that's how you end up entering in Mingyu's life and letting Mingyu enter yours. That's how you end up on Mingyu's sofa, two weeks later, on a Friday night, chilling, Mingyu's head on your lap, fingers threading through his soft hair, paying more attention to him than the movie really. And that’s because Mingyu was kissing you before you two chose the movie. He kissed you against his door, and gave you a peck when you put your bag on his table, and he kissed you again on the sofa, make you whimper because the way he is holding your hips. But he is a nice guy, and you said you were not ready for all that, so he goes back to his good guy persona and lays on the couch, head in your lap, leg almost entirely off the couch.

And then his phone rings and rings, so Mingyu breathes deeply and annoyed, because who dares disturb his head-rubbing time and sits up.

"Hey," Mingyu says and his face changes so fast you can almost feel in the air "Okay okay, just-" he says already getting up and doing his back pocket tap that he always does to go out. "Okay, just give him some Tylenol, ok? I’m already on my way, I can call when I'm about ten minutes away so you can go down, ok? It’ll be faster."

He stops to look at you. And he looks so afraid that you just know it is about Minseok.

"It’s ok. Go." You say because it is, the change of his demeanor says is something important.

"Fuck," Mingyu says, hands going to his hair and tugging it "It’s just Minseok. We just found out he has Crohn's disease and he is having a flare up. We need to take him to the hospital, he is down with a fever so it’s not a good sign and I should go really."

"I can drive," You say getting up as well.

“Oh no, no you can stay really finish the movie, you can totally feel at home, you can cook something or shit-"

"Mingyu," You say searching for his hand, big against yours. "You are shaking." And you can almost feel the energy trapped inside him, making him tremble all over. "Hey it's gonna be OK, Minseok is gonna be fine. I just need you to calm down. I’ll drive and everything will be OK. Minseok needs you calm."

"Ok, ok. Thank you."

So you guys storm off. You guys ended up in Mingyu's car, you fixing up his car seat and his rear view mirror to make comfortable to you. And every time you stop on a red traffic light you check Mingyu out, breath still fast enough for you to notice, face full of worry. And in that moment, you think you care so deeply about Mingyu, because seeing him like that is making your heart break in tiny little pieces.

Because Mingyu is just not like that. To you, Mingyu is always warm, always full of energy. He’s like a warm soft blank that has just enough weight so you can feel grounded on your bed. Mingyu is a night sky - big but so full of stars, those same stars bright enough to guide you home.

When you finally arrive at Minseok's place you see the little guy in his mother's arm and that makes your heart break all over again. You see Mingyu open the door for them, and he goes to the other side putting Minseok in his little chair, the woman doesn't even look at you, her full attention on Minseok, but still you feel uneasy. Out of place. You feel like you are barging in in a scene that is not yours, like an extra ruining the shoot. But then Mingyu is at your side again, hands on your thigh, big in contrast, and you feel his warmth and assurance, so you just drive.

At the hospital, everything seems kind of hectic, and you again feel out place again, asking yourself if you should be there. In your mind, you know you did the best of the situation: you helped Mingyu, and that should be enough. But emotionally, you feel so damn invisible in it all, and that makes you feel even worse because it makes you feel so egoistic. For God's sake, a child is sick needing a hospital and here are you feeling like you need to cry because fuck you feel out of place? Feeling pathetic about it makes you want to cry too.

So, when you and Minseok's mother are side by side, coffee in hands and Mingyu on the loose searching for food, you want to just get up and leave without giving a proper explanation, but you think you need to be a reasonable adult.

"You see…" Minseok's mother starts. "Mingyu never brought a girl home." And you kinda feel strange what she is saying but hey her kid is on the hospital, she may be going crazy. "I never actually even saw one of his girlfriends, ever."

"Oh, I’m not his girlfriend, we’re just friends." You start, but the taste of the phrase feels weird against your tongue.

"Yeah," She laughs, and you know she is laughing at you, which makes everything worse. "I know my brother and I know how he looks to someone." She says, holding her head, elbows on her own thighs, and she looks so so tired, and that too, makes you want to cry. "But I’m glad that you are here. I may not seem glad because my kid is right now on a hospital bed, but-" she says laughing again, and now you are not so sure why she is laughing, she looks so exhausted she is almost out of it. "But since Minseok's father passed away Mingyu is just giving his all you know? He bends over backwards for us. He picks Minseok on school when I can’t get out of the work on time, he was the one who could actually take care of Minseok the last time he went to hospital because I was too damn busy, and he actually cooks for us and he just goes to my home to leave side dishes. He is doing more than he should. He is doing what a father should be doing." She says and you hear her heart breaking, you almost see the blood, because she is so transparent, so worried, so sorry, and all that don't make sense in your head. "What I’m trying to say is that my little brother is precious, so if you fuck up, I might kick your ass."

"I thought he was-"

"Minseok's father? I know I gave birth to a mini version of my brother, but like, it's a little screwed up you didn’t know. Maybe you guys should work on your communication."

And that stays on your mind. Stays on your mind when it gets too late to get an Uber so Mingyu insists on you driving his car back because ubers can be weird and unsafe. Stays on your mind when he doesn't text you. Stays on your mind when you are at university, yet again lecturing about sociology classics and some passionate kids are debating about communism, and you can't even make yourself worry that you are not that older than the people you call kids. Stays on your mind when you arrive home and you can't quite bring enough courage to knock on Mingyu's door.

But then two days after the whole not-Minseok-daddy’s fiasco, Mingyu is at your door. Looking like a truck just hit him, the same clothes from a few days, body a mess, and you suspect that mind too. So, you let Mingyu in, guide him to your shower, go to his home pick up his clothes, and you roll your sleeve and start making Mingyu dinner. You are not a good cook, and Mingyu is certainly better than you, but still, you try your best. It’s what you’ve been doing all your life really.

You are putting garlic and onions in the pan when you feel Mingyu's arms going around you. He puts his forehead on your shoulder, and you can smell your soap’s scent on his skin.

"I'm sorry I vanished."

"It's okay it must have been tough. I understand."

"I know you do, and I'm very thankful for that but-" Mingyu turns his head to your neck, and you can feel his smell you and his hot breath against it. "I still shouldn't have done it. It was a dick move. You were also worried."

"Yeah, but it’s okay. Is he okay?" You say lowering the fire.

"Yeah, he is already talking about how his mom should give him a better cellphone so he can play Pokémon go at the hospital because everything is so boring."

"See? He’s okay. Minseok is fine." You say turning and giving Mingyu a hug, his head going again to your neck, almost rubbing himself on you.

"Yeah, we just need to pay more attention to his diet." He says still bending to hug you.

"See, Minseok is fine, but you don't look so good sir, so let me treat you to a nice, homemade meal." You say giving his butt a little tap because one more second in Mingyu's and everything will be burned in the pan.

"What I did do to deserve you?"

"A lot of things, Gyu, a whole lot of things."

Mingyu eats, and it seems to improve his energy a bit because he insists on watching a movie with you, even tho you know he looks like he may fall asleep at every minute - he didn't actually sleep soundly for two days and you said that to him, but, being the stubborn guy he is, he still insists. So you two end up in your bed, bodies tangled, Mingyu's head on your chest, your fingers going through his hair - he favorite thing in the whole world he says and that makes your heart bloom, full of tiny little flowers.

You wake up in a different situation. Mingyu's body now pressed against your back, his thigh big against yours, and his hand splayed against your other thigh. Mingyu's strong arms around you, and he is warm against you and surprisingly soft. You squirm a little trying to change position until you can face Mingyu, face soft and peaceful.

And fuck.

Maybe you don't just care about Mingyu.

Maybe, just, maybe you have fallen in love with him. Maybe now, after having him on your bed, you will continuously think about how you want to wake up in his arms. Maybe you will continuously think about how you want to be Mingyu's shelter, how you want to be the place he comes back to when times get rougher. Maybe you want to be Mingyu's night sky clear enough and starry enough to guide him home. And all that makes you feel like you want to cry and weep because maybe you are not ready enough. Maybe you will never be. But you want to be, you want so much and that makes things even harder.

So when Mingyu gives you a peck on the lips when he is going home to change for the gym and you are ready for a day in the university you also feel like crying.

And when Mingyu sends you a message asking you out - on a proper date he makes that clear enough you also feel like crying.

And when Mingyu is knocking on your door because you didn't answer and he saw your car in the garage when he was back from his market trip you are already crying before even answering the door.

"Hey-" He freezes and his demeanor changes. "Hey, what's wrong?"

You just continue to cry, feeling like a dumb little kid, feeling like a pan full of water in the stove, boiling and overflowing.

"Hey, babe what's wrong?" Mingyu says, hands on your cheeks making you look at him. "You’re making me worried."

"I just-" You try to say, cleaning your face but you just hiccup harder.

"Are you feeling unwell? Do you need to go to the hospital?"

"No, I'm OK." And you say because you see Mingyu's face squirm in agony.

"Ok, ok. Do you need anything? Do you want me to buy anything? Fix anything? Did someone mistreat you?" Mingyus 

continues to try searching for something in your face.

"No I-"

"You can tell me if it is someone from your work or-" He tries again.

"It is not about work, it is about us." You finally say, not because you summed up the courage, but because the way Mingyu is acting is breaking your heart all over again.

"Us?" Mingyu bends his head to the side. "Okay, what's wrong with us?"

"Sometimes I get too wrapped up in my head and that's not your fault." You say, just leaving him there and sitting on the sofa. And you feel the urge to just tug at your hair and scream. "And the whole I'm not ready thing and your sister-"

"What did my sister say?" Mingyu cuts you, closer to you, arms folded against his chest.

“It’s  not because of what she said, she is actually right about it-"

"Look babe, I love my sister to death, I love Minseok to death, I’d die and kill for both of them, but my sister is overprotective so whatever she said-"

"She said we don't have good communication." You blur out at once.

"Oh, for fucks sake,"

"And she’s right because I thought Minseok was your kid right?" You tell Mingyu a little exasperated. "Like we've been hanging out right? And I didn't feel comfortable to talk about it with you"

"Everyone thinks Minseok is my kid." Mingyu says like is not a big deal.

"Yeah but your maybe girlfriend shouldn't and I found out on a trip to a hospital when all the time I was thinking about how worried you were because it was your kid." You say bringing your knees to your chest because all this is fucked up, you shouldn't be talking about this with Mingyu because you have no right to, you were the one that spent too much time not saying yes, and when you said yes didn't even feel like a yes to be honest.

"I was worried, and Minseok is my kid in a way.”

"Mingyu,” You breathe deeply, because you feel stupid, and you feel like you are asking too much "Maybe that's my fault too, I'm not blaming you, that's why I told you that I was not ready for a relationship because I always fuck things up. I get so scared that I fuck things up before people realize I'm not good enough fo-"

"For fucks sake," Mingyu says opening his arms and tilting his head again. And you think is the first time you see Mingyu mad or frustrated, or both at the same time, you really can’t time. "What the fuck do you mean with not good enough? You are caring, you are smart, and you actually drove me to the hospital and stayed there until I kicked you out. All that when we’ve been seeing each other for two weeks, how is that not being good enough?" Mingyu take your hand that is laying against your knee and caresses it with his thumb. "You make me go crazy every time we are together and I feel the happiest I've ever been in these months fuck this year actually has been a hell for me." Mingyu kicks nothing, and you feel so sorry for bringing it up, for crying, because you can see that this is hard for him too. "So yeah, maybe you are not ready so what? Maybe we don't have communication, yeah sure we fucked up, but if you get out of your head, maybe it’s all because I'm the asshole, I'm the one who loves his nephew enough to want to actually fit the dad shoes because Minseok deserves a father figure. I-" Mingyus says and you can see that his knee almost buckles, making him change positions. "I'm still lacking too, maybe I'm a mess too, fuck, maybe I'm not ready too, but I prefer not being ready together than being ready at the wrong time." Mingyu takes another step, and his hand goes to your cheeks caressing it, making you closer your eyes and just enjoy his faint touch. “So don’t feel pressured ok? You are not in this alone, and I told you I’m all okay with waiting and I’m- I may not seem like it, but I am a mess too, I have my doubts too, and I get into my head too. So when you are getting all crazy and stuff just, just let’s have a talk, ok?”

“Okay, yeah. Okay.” You say catching his hand and kissing his palm. “Can we order food? Can we order Chinese?”

“Of course we can, baby.” Mingyu says with a chuckle.

“And then, " You start unsure of yourself because you still think you are asking too much and giving too little. "Then can you tell me about Minseok? Can we talk about the whole history?”

“Of course, we can” Mingyu says, looking at you fondly again, and for once you feel that being transparent to Mingyu is not that bad because you feel like he understands you need. “I may cry though, so…”

“It's okay, I'm pretty sure you gonna be cute crying.” Mingyu gives you a big smile and that makes you feel alright.

So Mingyu tells you a lot. He tells about Minseok's dad death, he tells about his own father's death and how that impacted him, and how he draws the parallel between Minseok and himself. He talks about how his sister is so protective of him even tho she is half his size, he talks about how his sister always picked his fight. He tells you about Minseok favorite things - Pokémon, ice cream, and dinosaurs. He tells you everything he can think of until you two finish up dinner, and he continues to tell you everything when you are laying in his arms, his hands on your hair, your body over him - legs and arms across Mingyu, because you feel the need to hug his big and beautiful heart, but you settle the need hugging him instead.

And you and Mingyu just fall into a routine easily. You sleeping on his bed or him sleeping on yours, even though his feet always hang on the end of your bed because he is just too damn big and tall. You always say goodbyes at the door, or on the elevator, Mingyu going to the gym, you to your work. Sometimes, when Mingyu has a deadline you stop at your favorite restaurant and order food to cheer him up. Sometimes, Mingyu picks you up so you guys can eat out for a change. But the thing is - its always more than once a week.

So when Mingyu knocks on your door, maybe the fourth time this week (without counting the times you knocked on his door) you are ready to give a pretty and polished version, with heels and all, because Mingyu is taking you to the new fancy restaurant across town.

"Hey-Wow" Mingyu says and you almost throw yourself at him, you almost drool and make a fool of yourself, because Mingyu is wearing black slacks and a white button-down, and god your boyfriend is so hot. "You look amazing babe." He says holding your finger up and making you twirl.

"Thanks," You give him a kick peck and spread your hands against his chest. "You don't look so bad either."

The restaurant is nice, the place is beautiful, the food amazing, and the wine Mingyu ordered tastes so good against your tongue. But the only thing you actually think of is him. His pretty skin pecking out of hir shirt collar, his pretty lazy smile against a few cups of wine, his strong arms and peck against the fabric of his shirt.

When you guys finally settle on the Uber, Mingyu does one of the things he does best - he thinks and conjures in his mind that every damn living thing is in love with you, and it is endearing really. He is so protective and caring and that makes you want to jump him too. He nods to the uber and his big ass hand rest on your thigh, just where the hem of your black dress ends.

And you want to kiss him so bad, if it wasn't for the Uber, you could probably ride him in the backseat. You tug Mingyu's arms making him bend a little in your direction, while your other hand is splayed on top of his, fingers interwind. You kiss Mingyu’s jaw and feel his arm up, god, he is so strong and so hard all over it makes you go crazy, makes you want to merge your body with his, so you just try to get closer to him even if you know it's not really possible.

“You smell nice,” You say almost sniffing Mingyu, hand on his biceps and face on the slot of his neck.

“I smell like I always do?” Mingyu answers you but is more a question really. His hand still on you thigh, but this time giving it a squeeze.

“Yeah, but you always smell nice, baby.” You hands travels up - stopping on his chest. Well, fuck the uber really, he probably sees couples feeling eachother up all the time, so you just paw Mingyu chest.

“Thanks babe but,” He says, holding your hand and giving you a chuckle when he sees you pouting on his shoulder.

“No fun.” You say still trying to get your hand free, to feel Mingyu up in the backseat like a fucking teenager. And to be honest you like the prospect of it giggling a little, feeling dumb, but oh so happy.

“No fun?” Mingyu asks you. “I’m the most fun guy you’ve ever met, I love fun. Fun and I are synonyms.”

“Well, I’m trying to feel you up in the backseat of an uber and you’re not letting me, so, you are the most boring guy ever.” You say on Mingyu’s ear, whispering the words, and you just see his body jerking. He starts to cough, looking at you disbelieved, and you do the only thing possible and laugh.

You take pity on Mingyu's situation, because he is almost choking on the backseat. So you behave like a little girl, hands on her lap, no more touching his boobs, or trying to lick his neck and jaw. But you still think about every other thing you want to do to him. You think about how Mingyu’s hands are big and the way he always put on the small of your back, and you question how it would feel against your neck.

You also want to discover every nook and cranny of Mingyu. Because you love the way he is so reliable in every aspects of adult-life that you struggle a little, he was the one that dealt with the new ac installation in your apartment, but you also love the way he gets so silly and pouts with the smallest and easiest things, and deep down you know Mingyu can do that task, he was big and strong, yet you were the one taking the grasshopper off his balcony.

But when Mingyu is glued to your back, hands on your hips and mouth on your neck on the elevator you think that you settle to discover this version of him today. The version that has you wrapped up in his arms, and the version that has the audacity to feel you up in the elevator.

“You are such a jerk.” You say to Mingyu still latched on your neck.

“Me?” Mingyu asks trailing his hand till they stop on your ribcages, fingers digging in.

"Yes, you." You say trying to get out of Mingyu's embrace but he’s just so clinging, glued to your back, and he is actually keeping you in place with his strong arms. "You can do everything and I can't feel up in the uber. It’s unfair."

"Baby, the uber was right there." Mingyus says guiding you though the hall and stopping on your door.

"Yeah and the crazy lady from the 07 can show up at anytime." You say trying to up your door but Mingyu hands are still on you, now on the hem of your dress, toying with it. "I really shouldn't you let get your way with me today."

"Don't even think about that." Mingyu says, hands again on your hips, this time he starts rutting against your back. "I might die." And you two almost trip when you finally open the door and Mingyu's body weight makes you go forward.

"Yeah, but I’m still mad with you." You say tugging on Mingyu's shirt, his large body pressing you against the wall.

"Baby’s mad?" Mingyu coos, and your legs almost give up because the condescending tone his uses make your brain stop. "What can I do then, hmm?" Mingyu says already lifting your dress up. "What can I do so my baby is not mad with me?"

So you do the only thing you think really, you put hands on Mingyu's neck and bring him to a kiss, it is sloppy but you don't even care, because Mingyu's lip feel so soft, and you can trace the taste of the wine on his tongue. And you are so distracted that you only realize Mingyu is getting you naked when he breaks the kiss to take off your dress.

"Fuck-" Mingyu says actually looking at you, hands on your waist holding you back enough so he can see the way that the black lingerie you bought a few days ago cling onto your skin.

"Come here." You say grabbing Mingyu's shirt again, wanting his mouth back on yours. But Mingyu cuts the kiss short again, leaving sloppy kisses on your jaw and neck. "Babe." You call again, hand going to his hair and tugging.

"I know, I know" Mingyu says kissing your collarbone. "Fuck-" He says taking a step back again and you can feel your body going in his direction, but Mingyu's hand steadies you against the wall. "Just- you look so pretty." Mingyu says looking at you and you’d almost feel shy if you didn't feel so needy. "Look at you." He says hand traveling to touch your boobs so fucking softly you almost melt, fingertips grazing against your lingerie.

"Babe," You whine again, trying to get Mingyu's attention, but he doesn't care, too lost kissing your chest.

"Fuck-" Mingyu says grabbing your hips, toying with your panty line. "Wanna eat you out so bad," He says like almost begging and you need to balance yourself on his shoulders. "You’ll let me right?" Mingyu says looking at you, eyes still against on your skin.

And you feel like your mouth is not working properly so you just give him a nod and it's enough for Mingyu trails his lips lower and actually kneel in front of you. And that alone should be fucking illegal, so when he plants a little kiss on your mound you think you are ready to go straight to hell because you just want to shove his face on your pussy, but instead you just hold Mingyu's face, hands on his jaw.

"I-" he starts, hands on your ass, fingers digging on your skin. When you look at him again he looks so out of it, so lost, so pussy drunk you can almost cry. And when Mingyu actually starts to lap at your pussy, your lingerie still in place you feel actually insane, clenching around nothing and the feel of your wet panties against your core makes you tug at his hair. The way Mingyu looks - eyes closed, hair a mess because of you, eyebrows furrowing in concentration makes your hips buckle against his mouth, but he just keeps going, like there is no other thought in his mind.

"Babe please I need-" You say breathing rapidly, and you feel the urge to cry again, because is so good but at the same time is not enough.

"Hm?" Mingyu says mouth still on you, eyes opening looking at you.

"Need more." You say pathetically, but if you need to beg, you will beg.

"Yeah?" Mingyu asks. "Gonna give to you baby." He says just so he can get his mouth off of you to tug your panties to the side. Then his mouth is on your pussy again, like he can't really spent more than two seconds apart. And you just mew, one hand on Mingyu's hair, and another one trying to keep your body straight against the wall. "Fuck-" Mingyu says again tugging at your panties to the side again, and you can feel it digging at your chest but you don’t care. "How can a pussy taste so good?" Mingyu asks but you doesn't really have an answer, and you feel Mingyu's strong hands on your leg, manhandled your into position, leg against his shoulder, hand splayed on your thigh, while the other one goes to your pussy opening you up. "Pussy’s so pretty fuck, could eat you out for days." He says almost breathless before going back to lap at your pussy, fingers still keeping your open and sucking at your clit.

And everything makes you feel insane. Of course Mingyu's tongue against your entrance makes your knees give up, of course the way he keeps you open for his mouth makes it so dirty, but whats really keeps you going, what makes you reach the edge so fast is the way he hums against your pussy, like it's his favorite thing in the world, the way he is so fucking desperately laps at it, the way the everytime your hips buckle Mingyu just follows the moviment because he can't take his mouth off you for a fucking second and it's what makes you cum. And you actually need to hold Mingyu's head for a minute so he leaves your pussy in other to you catch a breath.

"Need a minute," You say explaining when he looks at you puzzled. "Sensitive."

"Did you just-" Mingyu stops, looking at you and at your pussy making you laugh a little. "Did you just cum?"

"Yeah?"

"Fuck, you are so hot." He says giving the leg that still on his shoulder a bite. "But you can take more right?" He says fingers tracing your pussy, pressing your clit making you jump a little. "You need to take more babe, gonna eat your pussy again, open you up with my fingers," he says fingers on your entrance "and then will you make you come on my cock I know you will take so fucking well-" and he plants a kiss on you clit again. "Pretty pussy taking my cock hm? Gonna make you enjoy it, promise, gonna make you feel good."

And you don't doubt for a second that he will make you feel good, fuck he just made you cum against a wall two steps away from your door, but before you can say anything Mingyu is attatched to your pussy again.

"Wait, babe" Mingyu says. "This damn thing is getting on my way." He says letting your legs fall down and he finally takes off your panties, not even bothering to get really off of you, Mingyu just let one of your legs free while your panties sits on your feet. "God, if you let me, I will eat you out everyday, lick this pussy everyday before getting out of bed." He says like he is telling you about a new habits like drinking water first thing on the morning, or have a juice everyday - but he is talking about how he wants to bury his face on your legs like he is doing now, tongue going against your folders, arm going around your leg and opening you open again for him, while the other one goes to your ribcage keeping your body upright. And you loose track of time really, just focusing on Mingyu's tongue against you, humming all over again. "Fuck, how can a cunt taste so fucking good." Mingyu says mouth leaving your pussy as his fingers tacking its place. "You are making me insane, going to cum at my pants if we keep going like this." And you can actually see Mingyu palming himself.

"We can-" You try to start but he just chuckles.

"Oh no, don't worry about me." He says eyes leaving you and going again to your pussy, and you feel so exposed in Mingyu's hand, his digit finally entering you which makes you whimper, until know you didn't really paid attention on how empty you felt. "Making you feel good is enough for me." He says like he is not fingerfucking you to the second orgasm of the night. And again is not really the actions itself, of course. Mingyu’s longer fingers entering you is so fucking good, the way his thumb goes at your clitoris rubbing it in circles makes you cry, but when you look down and Mingyu barely blinks, eyes on your pussy and licking his lips like he didn't eat your pussy for minutes, is what makes you break, the way he looks so fucked blissed about giving you pleasure like he doesn’t need anything else.

And you come on his fingers and almost melting, but Mingyu lifts and holds you up, giving your ass a squeeze.

"So fucking hot-" Mingyu says his strong arms around you making you move towards the sofa, and you are pretty sure he is just dragging you around because your legs gave up. "Could use my mouth to clean you up-" and you almost scream when he is laying on the sofa, letting himself get comfortable between your legs.

"Babe, I love your mouth," you say tugging in Mingyus shirt, and how the fuck he is not naked. "but really I need your cock, otherwise I might go crazy." And you use your last few working neurons to start open the buttons on his shirt but suddenly stop when Mingyu just shoves two fingers inside you again.

"Hm, but you look stuffed enough baby." Mingyu says lowering himself and giving you a kiss, you feeling the taste of your pussy on his mouth.

"Mingyu, please" You beg. "Please, I-"

"Shh, it's okay, gonna give it to you." He says finally getting off his shirt and you feel so empty you can feel yourself clenching over nothing, and you can see how Mingyu just watches your pussy. "Fuck, baby, don't worry" He says already opening up his pants. "Gonna give to you real good, gonna make you feel so full."

"Oh, thank god." You say making him laugh before getting naked, and fuck, he was pretty and big all over. And you almost drool because, shit, even his dick is pretty. "Can I suck you off?" You ask already crazy enough that you mind-mouth filter just vanished.

"Oh fuck," Mingyu say hips buckling, making his cock sits on your mound, and he looks so big. Thank fuck he stretched you out. "Yeah, yeah not now though, might cum on your mouth."

"That's alright."

"Babe," Mingyus mewls, head resting on your collarbone, looking defeated. "Don't say things like that I almost-" He says hips buckling again. "Wanna fuck you properly."

"Ok, ok, but later…"

"Yeah, you can choke on it later, I won't be against it." And god, you want Mingyu to shut the fuck up because if he keeps talking to you, you’re gonna cum again without his dick inside you. "Fuck, might not last long" Mingyu says, and you almost laugh at him, because he is acting like you are not one step away from being spent just because of your mouth. Mingyu guides his cock with his hand, mouth watering looking at it, and when you feel hime ntering you you actually sees your boyfriend gulp.

And then you think about Mingyu saying how different you both are from each other. How his main sense is his vision, while for you, every touch sends you overdrive. And how both of you are so different but fit so well, because when Mingyu is fucking you, his body against yours, mouth at your jaw and hand holding yours, you feel like earth could collapse and the world could end because you already had the taste of the most important thing in the world; the taste of being loved by Mingyu, and you are sure nothing will come close to it.

You feel the urge to make Mingyu feel the same way, so loved and so cherished. So while Mingyu is fucking you, you try your best, you kiss his jaw - and it's messy and sloppy, but it's the best you can do when his dick is stretching you out. You claw at his shoulder, and you put your legs around his waits.

"Fuck, baby-" You try to speak again but you feel unable to, like your brain are not even trying to put more than two words together.

"I'm so fucking close." Mingyu says with his thrust getting faster, out of rhythm, body more pressed against yours.

And you just let the wave wash over you. You can feel Mingyu getting even more unruly, babbling things that you can't really make sense because, fuck, you are so gone. The way that he fills you up in every corner is just different, the way that he stretches you almost makes you feel like you arrived at a point of no return, and when you cum, clenching around him, Mingyu reaches his breaking point.

"Fuck-" He says getting off of you, and getting his hair out of his face, and his smile is so big, so beautiful and so lazy you could just kiss him if your limbs were working really.

"Hey baby, can you please take my bra off?" You say already turning on the bed but when Mingyu's laugh reaches your ears you are so fucking glad that you moved.

[xokiddo]

YAYAYAY i’m so glad to see you more active! i have so many things to say to you since you’re one of my fav blogs but my thoughts are so scattered😩 CONGRATS ON GRAD SCHOOL!!! i hope all goes well and that it treats you kindly!

i just got around to hammer chapter 14 and i adore it i love it and you really know how to make your readers stick around. on that note, don’t worry about updating frequently, school first! you’ve already got me hooked and any crumbs from you are enough for me!

i also re read heart of glass recently after leaving a very emotionally and verbally difficult relationship (i can’t bring myself to call it the A word yet); it hit so much differently this time and i can’t thank you enough for it. getting to heal along with it (especially in a new relationship) has been very therapeutic.

LASTLY i saw you tag soul eater and i didn’t know you liked it… it’s one of my fav animes 😭 i thought you couldn’t get any cooler omg, pls save some from the rest of us

- anon who rereads your work

Aww you can always come back into my inbox!! I swear I'm friendly lol I'm always down for people in my inbox/messages, I am trying to be better about responding quicker if I don't manage to right away. And thank you!

Omg! I'm grateful for you (and all my readers honestly) for sticking with me on Hammer because it's a slow labor of love but I know the emphasis is on the slow part right now 🥲 I'll always share Hammer crumbs too or my general musings on it without spoilers, too, if you ever want to pop in with a bowl for crumbs. 😂

Okay fandom things aside - I am so thankful that you are out of the relationship and safe! Saying the A word is a big step, but it's a healing step. It's important to be able to acknowledge what it is so that you can take the steps past it, too. All in your own time, though. Don't let anyone rush that for you - and that includes yourself. I have had a few people in comments or messages say similar sentiments, and I don't take for granted any of them. Being able to utilize my own experiences and create a story that can be enjoyable, therapeutic, any of it, for you and others is something I treasure. So thank you for letting me be a part of that journey for you! (also thank you for re-reading HOG as much as I want to pick it apart a few years later, it's so important to me still)

AND YOU LIKE SOUL EATER AHHHH I will ALWAYS readily shriek about it because I LOVE it and think it's wildly underrated. I have all the thoughts and feelings about it.

You are so lovely thank you for blessing my inbox again 😍

[thinlinez]

I recently got back to reading fics after a LONG period of life just not letting me (almost a whole year of not being able to read fics, watch my fav series just cause i was so tiered hah��). Wanted to reread some of my favorite works, many of which were from you (lost & found in oblivion, that highschool neighbor Au and a few others.. forgot the Titels im sorry !!) and i saw that they were all in a hidden collection, and LUCKILY not deleted i think i might actually cry if you deleted any of your works..

I dont know why you did that but ofc i Respect your decision and if you want to keep it like that forever then do what you think is best !! I saw that it might have sth to do with you wanting your Bh fics to also get appreciation? Either way, im ofc gonna read the fics you still have up (and i actually have already read Divinely Blessed in the past haha!).

Just want you to know that i really appreciate you as an author, and i apologize that you have to read all that i wrote😅

My questions would be, do you think youre ever going to put your other works up again? Or at least some of them? Because i GENUENLY love your works, and some of them also became my comfort fics and shit.. I LOVED 'truth would be' and that one fic where H and L go on a road Trip? I really cant remember the names of some haha

And i saw that i can 'join' the collection, do you accept these applications? Is that even possible idk how that works. I just wanna read my comfort fics again!!

But its obviously okay if youre not comfortable with that.

Anyway, sorry u had to read all that again, and i honestly dont care abt who bottoms and who doesn’t, wouldn’t even be mad if you reposted the hidden fics with their names Switched, i just LOVE your writing, and i really hope youre not hiding your talent forever!

Dear anon,

Wow, that was a long message! And you remembered all of the fics names too 😆 that's impressive! Well, thank you for saying that they are your comfort fics! And yes I'm not deleting them just hiding them for now. I won't make them available any time soon though I'm really sorry... I'm hiding them because I hope to be more known for my new fics and not for the old ones. I don't really want people to know me for my old fics you know... And I won't ever switch the names 😂 it doesn't work that way! I wrote those old fics because that was how I picture everything however I no longer see those characters in that light, that's why I can't really stand them... sorry my babies...

Thanks again for this message, maybe one day in the future I'll make them available again, one day when I feel I love those fics again I will! For now you can read the new ones and although you might not like them as much, they are written with love!