#there's just a lot of nuance to them that im not going to ignore

[sukibenders]

Listen, and I say this as a Rhaenicent fan, but seeing some on Twitter going "Alicent would never hurt Rhaenyra like that," or "But if she were with Alicent..." really has me shaking my head because, really? That's what you thought coming out of this episode?

[griem]

ijbol idk man releasing screenshots of very polarizing things said in a private discord server between friends in a public "callout" post is #the most #tumblrific thing ive ever seen LOL.

#opinion 😱 in tags

[crows-home]

oooooo I hate it when adults can't act like adults

[kindred-spirit-93]

HOO BOI. i desperately want to write volumes about this topic alone but ill stick to a tag rant because is have so much studying lol.

demeter they could never make me hate you. you were imo the only sensible person in the myth(s) actually and a good mum. fuck u zeus

The story of Hades and Persephone isn't an abduction romance, or even a tragedy of not being able to be in two places at the same time. It's about how fucking wild it would be to have a mother who gives a shit about whether you're dead or alive, and whether you are happy.

[bogkeep]

Would you recommend the SSSS comic? I know little of it beside the very beautiful artstyle and premise

to answer the question of if i would recommend SSSS as a comic: yes, yes i would.

a description for those who don't know: Stand Still Stay Silent is a post-apocalyptic horror + adventure webcomic set in the nordics (norway, sweden, denmark, finland, iceland) that have been isolated from the rest of the world and gone back to their old gods. the the world outside of safe zones is full of trolls and beasts - humans and mammals that got infected by a horrible virus and turned into monsters. the story follows a ragtag crew that ventures into the old world (derelict denmark) on an expedition to collect books.

the comic updated every workday until it concluded in 2022, and consists of two Adventures. the creator had plans for many adventures with these characters in this world, but ended it after two when she wanted to take a new direction with her life.

what i love about it:

- the art is GORGEOUS. it's been a huge source of inspiration for me. open any page and it's a masterpiece, and you will ask yourself "how the FUCK did she update this FIVE DAYS A WEEK"

- the characters are wonderful and endearing. i just, i love them so much. i am so thankful lalli hotakainen exists he is one of my #1 blorbos forever

- the world is so cool. the blend of chunky sci-fi and norse mythology fantasy magic slaps. it goes so hard. i fell so hard for this comic when i got to the big ferry ship with a viking style dragon head prow added to it. it's everything

- it really really gets nordic cultures. it's difficult to explain all the dynamics and nuances but it just gets it. it brings me as a scandinavian a lot of joy to read a story that speaks to my heart this way. the attitudes, the language barriers, the cultural differences... it was so refreshing to me in a media landscape dominated by american stories. when the pandemic hit, i decided to reread the comic because i found such an odd comfort in seeing how it depicted the scandinavian countries reacting to, well, a pandemic.

- there's kittycats

what i don't like about it:

- the most glaring and obvious flaw is that everyone in the comic is white. there's not a single character of color anywhere, not even i background shots or the prologue. there's no mention of the saami people (the indigenous people of northern europe), either. i believe this was done in ignorance more than malicious intent, but the implications are Extremely Bad and it's been bothering me (AND MANY OTHERS) since day 1. that is the number one caveat i will give to anyone wanting to check this comic out. i've been in the discourse trenches and i am not going to excuse this. it's just bad!

- you can tell in the middle of adventure 2 that the creator has kind of lost interest in the work, around the time when she found jesus i guess. like, very few people can keep up work on the same creative project for years and years and years and i think it's fine that she wanted to drop it, but it's a bit sad to see the comic dragged to its end like a limp corpse, and feeling like the creator no longer really cares about the characters.

- minna sundberg has said and done some questionable things, presumably gotten somewhat radicalised over time, and has also converted to hardcore christianity which is what her new works are about. there's nothing about this in SSSS - there is a moment of christianity represented in the story in a sort of mythological sense, just like the other religions, but this was written before minna's conversion. her new works... are a Choice. i have much to say about them, and i have, and im not gonna rehash it now.

SO YEAH hopefully this will help you take an Informed Choice! i got into this comic in 2015 and was deep in the fandom and it's for better or for worse part of my soul foundation now.

i also recommend A Redtail's Dream, minna's "practice comic" before SSSS, based on finnish mythology and the kalevala.

[sysmedsaresexist]

im a system trying to learn more about endos.

so far in syscourse ive only seen proof of cdds being traumagenic but they dont disprove non-cdd plurality, so what sources are there that have evidence of endogenic systems, if you have any?

Right now? There isn't any hard evidence that would satisfy anti endos. There's TONS of papers and articles talking about the recent emergence of endogenic systems, but they're mostly interview based. I debunked a lot of them when I was still anti. Small sample sizes, personal bias about dysfunction levels, all interviews. Those won't stand for those who are skeptical.

Now that I've calmed my gender neutral tits, though, I can look at where all this research is heading, and I can look back and find all the different terms that have been used to describe this same phenomenon. Those terms don't fall under psychology, they appear in journals about consciousness and self and philosophy, and they go all the way back to the 1800s, developing right alongside theories on hysteria and split personality, and the TOSD.

I don't need to do the work for you (/nm), just Google multiple self theory and fall down the rabbit hole. Trust me. One Google search, move at your own pace. It'll mean more when you find all this yourself and make the journey on your own. It was way more effective when I went alone.

That said, I'm not heartless.

The most promising research coming out is the tulpa studies.

Tanya Luhrmann and Michael Lifshitz are incredible, but it's Luhrmann who really stole my heart. She has a long list of work on religious communication with God and "others", and was a huge part of putting tulpas, and several other different voice hearing, religious communities into the fmri scanners to see what's going on. The reddit AMA is being passed around now, and it's largely being ignored by antis, without understanding what it was.

The tulpa studies began... shit, 5 years ago? Covid put a hold on the project, but it's back up and running and they're working on the final paper. The AMA was a chance for people to ask questions to the lead researchers about the project, including whether they found anything.

And they did.

The brains of tulpamancers and other practitioners lit up in unexpected areas and outside of conscious control (very basic overview).

Luhrmann also wrote about how this kind of research can help other voice hearers, and could potentially point to some new therapy opportunities for those struggling.

No, Luhrmann and Lifshitz are not dissociative specialists. Endogenic systems have screamed for decades about how they don't have CDDs and we just refuse to listen. This research is occurring in other areas and specialities. They don't need to be dissociative specialists to work fmri machines and see there's something happening.

My hope is that once the final results are published, we'll see some very quick movements comparing CDDs and endogenic systems. We're not there yet, but I think we'll actually have firm answers within the next couple years.

And after looking into other areas of research, and seeing the potential positives, and that they DID see some unexpected things on the scans...

Not to mention that I've spoken with Colin Ross, THE dissociative expert, who in the 1980s, wrote about "endogenous multiplicity," a subsection of those with MPD that had no trauma history, no dysfunction, no amnesia, etc, and he still stands by that to this very day. I've spoken with several other experts. Go look at Jamie Marich on Twitter and see all her colleagues in the notes.

Anti endo is a dying stance.

Learn nuance while you can (CDDs and endogenic plurality are different, occasionally overlapping), and jump ship before it's too late to take the harm back.

Happy googling and good luck!

[valeriianz]

For the fic writer asks:

4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES

5. Did you outline it?

7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?

25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share

omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!

4: Rambling about research!

do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?

man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.

there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.

once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."

(it means "get ahead.")

the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.

5: Did you outline the fic?

(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)

i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.

but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!

7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?

i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.

25: Share your favorite line

oh god, i have so many haha.

“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao

“It’s–” Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4

"His majesty is pleased." ch.5

“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7

“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11

“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11

“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14

26: Share your favorite detail

how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.

Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).

Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3

Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao

and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.

27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:

Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.

this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).

all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.

Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.

Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.

as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).

also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”

fic writer asks

[iworshipsappho]

misconceptions about yr characters that i have come across, that really piss me off

the fact some believe that simon essentially forced wille to pick between coming out and dating him. THAT WAS NOT THE ENTIRE CASE OMG. the problem wasnt that wille denied it was him, simon totally understood that even if he wasnt exactly happy with their situation, he knew about who wilhelm was from the beginning and what that entailed. it was the fact that wille essentially promised simon that he would do what was best for them and actually hopefully come out, but then denied any and all involvement with simon, even friendly without a semblance of keeping him in the loop. it was that which created the gaping chasm of broken trust and uncertainty between them. simon NEVER forced wille to come out, it was always going to be on wille's terms.

i saw a post that suggested that sara was the one being a dick at marieberg rather than the one being bullied. and oohhhh boy let me tell you how fucking mad it made me. look im not going to infantilize her and brush off all her mistakes with the dumb reasoning of "oh she's neurodivergent." no, i wont be doing that. like any other character she too has nuance and a lot of depth and its always the one dimensional "analyses" that make me want to scream (derogatory). so coming back to my point. seeing people just blatantly call her manipulative and unforgivable without realising how conflicted her character is just sooo ughhh. (i realise that im not really versed in the intricacies of how her character essentially feels and im always open to criticism and adept analyses of any and all characters :3)

posts were people essentially hold simon and/or sara's mistakes to the same level as the CRIMES that august has committed and its just????? what in the even???? like- as i said, not ignoring the nuance here, but literally NOTHING can justify august's actions. he was always going to use that video with malicious intent. it was never going to be some oops teenage boy did a smth stupid when he literally recorded an intimate video of two minors. nothing can morally or legally (ig) defend that-

apologies if this comes off as like insanely aggressive and incoherent or smth bc this is more or less a vent post fhjsghsjgsg :'))

ANYWAYS yeah

[naughtynoodle056]

Im not gonna pretend I don't think it's hot as hell when I'm In the Mood™, but when I am not and people come at me with no warning teasing me about how fat I am now I really wanna start throwing shit with my fucking mind. It's one thing when I'm blinded by the horny, but it feels so GROSS when people insist I'm fat or call me obese even if I know they don't mean it to be vicious because it's just like. I'm a size 2 at most. Slightly over 100 pounds. That being called 'obese' just takes me out of the fucking moment so so hard a lot of the times because it's just like a BIIIIIG Internalized Fatphobic Slap to the face. How are people that are bigger than I am by a Substantial Amount supposed to feel when they see people half their size getting fatshamed??? Not to mention that sometimes at my Worst, those sorts of things can and will trigger my own disordered eating problems and make me feel guilty about enjoying food...😐.

Sometimes I just feel too well versed in how fatphobia genuinely affects people on a real level to enjoy some of the stuff I see and deal with in this community, I guess. Calling someone that's not even 105lbs fat or overweight or obese reeks of 90s/2000s diet culture where it was only acceptable to be rail thin, not EVEN slim with a big butt. I definitely don't think every person guilty of this is bad at heart, not by a long shot. Most of it feels like ignorance and being blinded by horniness in the moment to think rationally, I just really wish some of them were a little more aware of how like... Loaded some of their comments can be, cuz I never wanna rip someone's head off if they just innocently think we're playing around.

I guess I just wish there was more nuance about it? IDK, a warning before jumping into that sort of thing??? xD IDK even a "hey are you in the mood for some Not So Soft Feedism" would go a long way cuz sometimes the playful teasing is fun!! But other times it just makes me feel gross. It's like a yucky reminder of "oh... you think any visible fat on someone's body = THEY'RE fat on some 90s/Y2K shit ... Ew...." and like I'm contributing to the "skinny people takin over the Feedism community " phenomenon just by existing and I dO NOOOOOTTTTT wanna do that at ALL. I'll ruin a whole vibe in a conversation and get serious before I start taking credit from the ACTUAL fat people in the community 😭

[cyberdragoninfinity]

Jaden for the ask game?

MY DEAR DEAR FRIEND JADEN YUKI

Why I like them/why I don’t: he's such a good character, man 😭 like what an introduction to the ygo spinoff grand lineup of characters. he's funny and charming and nuanced and so infectiously charismatic both in and out of universe i just have to love him. people tend to completely ignore his character growth in season 4 to keep him Sad Sad Turbo Depressed Forever which is such a shame, jay having to be reminded to not lose his sense of fun and passion for what he loves, something that's been so crucial to him for like half the series, is one of my favorite parts about him! he's just a fun character to watch and root for, truly one of the best yutags imho

What I like about their appearance: I love that in the grand roster of insane yugioh hair jaden rolls up and he's just. brunette. double brunette. it's delightful. kuriboh-head.

Do I prefer their dub names or original names? i have endless respect for judai as a name but he is forever going to first and foremost be jaden to me im afraid. i look at him and im just like "goddamn that is the Guy Named Jaden" ever. his impact on tboys named jaden.... unmatche

OTP: said it when i talked about aster but heroshipping numero uno <3 sooo so dear to me. i like chazz/jaden a lot too but i need there to be some catastrophe and divorce in there.

NOTP: talked already about how im not huge on the romantic jaden/yubel read, but im also not very big on jaden/syrus.... i know sometimes "uhm these characters are sibling coded" can be a bit of an asspull but this time thats like. The Text. they came like that. there is a very deliberate parallel between zane and jaden and how syrus looks up to them (and gets hurt by them.) jaden: "syrus needs his big brother" zane, dying: "he's got one" DUB LINES OF ALL TIME FOR ME. sy has two big brothers and it rules. anyway

OT3: i like the potential of jaden/chazz/jesse, i think that's a fun one.

Favourite card they use: Flame Wingman is just so fucking cool I love its tail and its color palette and its Very Genderful Implications. Also a big fan of Neo Spacian Dark Panther...all of the neo spacians are hysterical i love them

Favourite moment they were in: I FORGOT TO ANSWER THIS ONE FOR SOME REASON?!?!? god. he has a lot of great moments but my fav is the season 1 finale when duels zane. it's just such a good duel

Least favourite moment: guhhhh i have a lot of issues with the way jaden is handled in season 3 so i wont go off too much but im just not a terribly big fan of some of the elements of his personality that kind of got rather haphazardly sacrificed to make A Lot of Of All That function in the narrative (and kind of not spectacularly well.) ho hum.

Something I associate with them: Eevees, fat orange cats, and this genre of post

[allamericansbitch]

you are so weird so fucking weird she wrote those songs herself I’m pretty fucking sure she knows better about her state of mind when she wrote them than you do complete stranger! also just because she sees them differently now doesn’t mean it has to change for you and for anyone else! at the end of the day you are just a fan and this is just a song for you meanwhile for her it was her life and reality like get some perspective please and get off your high horse you sound insane

i was gonna ignore you being a crazy ranting lunatic in my inbox but it actually opens up the opportunity to talk about something a lot of you people are unfamiliar with: nuance and critical thinking. and im sure this surface-level thinking is gonna be really popular so lets just dispel it now.

yes taylor wrote her own songs (brilliant observation, 10 outta 10), she knows how she feels more than anyone and she's allowed to see her songs differently now because time changes everything and hindsight is always shifting everything. however, taylor has been in this industry longer than some of her fans have been alive, she knows her audience and what they do or how they act. so for her to do this very unnecessary move so publicly is indeed very very immature.

it's one thing to privately realize a song holds a different meaning to her, it's another to vocalize that change in perspective and force it on others by putting it in a playlist that changes the meaning for a lot of people. taylor knows her audience isn't mature enough to have their own meanings for songs, she knows they only let the songs live on through her and her personal life. this change doesn't just affect her and she knows that. so for you to have the dense mindset of 'it's her life she's allowed to do what she wants!' isn't true, it's not just 'her life'. it's her public life and that life also has connections to the life of the person who will be targeted because of her immaturity (Joe) and also the lives of the fans who didn't want to know of her personal change. It also forces a new public narrative on the upcoming album because she used this shift in perspective as a promotional tool for the album. so anyone who wanted to go into the album with a clear, drama-free mindset can no longer have that. this personal change she made is no longer personal, it's public and now it's everyone's problem.

[wolfisblank]

Hey, question after your very helpful capybara image id post. Why does color matter? And i mean this very genuinely and this IS coming from a place of ignorance - i was under the impression that image ids were for people who couldn't see images and were using a screen reader, i.e. blind and otherwise visually impaired folks. does the color matter to blind people? Very confused about this and have been for years im so sorry if this is a stupid question

It's not a stupid question! I understand why you might not know this, as unfortunately, a lot of nuances of disability aren't common knowledge. Generally speaking, I'd rather people ask questions, even if they're "stupid questions", if it helps them gain a better understanding of disability and accessibility! There are multiple reasons why:

Many blind people still have a bit of vision. It's a common misconception that all blind people cannot see at all. But in reality, in order to be legally blind, you have to fall under a certain threshold of vision (20/200).

Many blind people who do have total vision loss were not born blind, and thus know what red would look like and can imagine the image more accurately with the help of an ID.

Image IDs are not just for blind people, but also people with visual processing issues and other visual disabilities. These people may still be able to see, but find a text description or screen reader helpful

Image IDs can be helpful for able-bodied people too. If your internet connection is poor or your Tumblr just isn't loading images for some reason, you can oftentimes still see image IDs. And sometimes you may benefit from a text description because you have trouble telling what's going on in an image, or just because you might like to read a description of an image.

If any blind or otherwise disabled people who benefit from IDs see this post, feel free to add on! My own visual disability doesn't cause me to need IDs, so I might have missed something.

[daydreaming-scheming-demon]

something that really annoys me about my mum is how she rarely ever understands media that does the whole ‘looks child friendly but is actually fucked up’ thing

i remember trying to show her dhmis and she somehow just focused on the song parts and funny looking characters and thought it was fun, while ignoring most of the disturbing stuff, barely even had much of a reaction to most of them besides the really gory stuff. her reaction made it seem like the disturbing stuff was out of place in this show even after many episodes in, when the show has established itself as disturbing.

i get that dhmis is a very abstract show and meant to be interpreted in many different ways, the creators have even said theyd accept any interpretation. but i still dont know how to feel about my mum’s interpretation of ‘literally just a fun musical with a few weird things in it and nothing else to it’

it’s not just with shows like these tho, showing her some of my favourite media ever is always so annoying. because every time one of two things will happen: either she’ll completely miss any point the media was trying to make and just see it as a goofy lil thing, or she’ll have an oversimplified takeaway that mashes the themes and messages of the media down into fridge magnet quotes.

it’s unbearable to hear her takeaways from some of the most thematically complex shows and movies be something like “you should be kind to others, and it’ll come back to you in one way or another”.

i mostly accept alternative interpretations of media, but it’s different when someone clearly hasn’t even the slightest idea of what a piece of media is trying to achieve and believes they do. and with my mum it’s just painful.

darker or more complex themes completely going over her head, her lack of ability to follow even fairly simple narratives, digesting complex themes down into fridge magnet quotes on the rare occasion that she actually has a takeaway, all while somehow being ignorant that she’s even missing anything at all.

like, idk. i feel like im being mean here. at least her doing this isnt actually hurting me in any way, just annoying me. unlike other things she’s done. and with other people i might not feel as strongly about them missing thinga like this. but like, this still shows such a lack of media comprehension. and it feels like this is connected to other things she’s done. the lack of ability to understand other perspectives ive seen in her, lack of ability to see her own faults unless put under a lot of pressure (tho even then it doesnt go far), her strict and simple worldview that fails to address much nuance. it’s all so unbearable.

i dont like showing my mum the stuff i like.

[steve-brules-rules]

I would like to ramble about Dasein and the ending of Novus now that I’ve had time to digest the ending, because I LOVED IT. Spoilers for the very end of Novus below the break, obviously lol

My poor baby boy. I did not expect Dasein to actually *fuckin kill* the manticore. It was SO satisfying (also satisfying after I spent about an hour soloing it with no prep and teaching myself how to do it lolol). But you can tell he’s just so completely frustrated at that point. Like after everyone has been exploiting him, he tries to find a solution through the manticore. He’s still too naive to fully understand how talking to the manticore is a bad idea. He doesn’t realize that until it’s almost too late and he needs the wizard to help again. He’s definitely frustrated at both himself and everyone else. I think he’s also frustrated at the wizard for their disagreement on how to resolve things.

And I think he’s disappointed in the wizard because he’s kinda had this illusion about them shattered. He obviously knows they’ve been physically kicking asses at every point along the way, but now he’s seen that they’ll ignore him to do things their way. This is obviously because they know better than him how people like Mario and Rottingham work and it’s kiiiiinda a emergency with the four major spiral powers going to war, but it’s still gotta be so awful to see how you’ve tried so hard to be peaceful, and it’s *just not working.* Ugh. :(

Id argue he’s also disappointed in himself. He’s exhausted, burnt out, and now he’s feeling resentful too. He’s probably feeling a lot of guilt for feeling frustration and resentment. He’s probably really conflicted about the wizard. At least, that’s what I’d be feeling.

Just. The fact that he reached a breaking point like that, after it feels like he’s so lost, and nobody wants to help him the way he needs. Even the wizard.

Im really wishing the devs did more at this point to expand how dialogue is delivered in this game. It’s clear they want to make things more complex, more involved, and I really think the current system is holding it back. I want to see what the wizard is thinking and saying. I want to see a choice-based response system with consequences for those responses. I’m so so mad that I couldn’t control my wizard’s responses more because I wanted to be a lot more compassionate to Dasein than I was allowed to be. This system worked great in places like arc 1/2 because who cares, we’re all on the same page with waking up the emperor of mooshu and freeing he manders and stomping both mali and morganthe. But now things are more nuanced. Do people agree with the idealistic Dasein, or with the worldly and jaded spiral superpowers? How do people respond to Mario’s accusations of not having any business meddling in the affairs of the spiral when they’re not even native to the spiral? AARRGHHHHH I just wanna delve into this more and I can’t and it’s frustrating to feel like there are multiple ways to respond and I’m locked into one path when this should be a wizard guided by a better moral compass than what we see. So many things are just so confusing, like not disobeying Rottingham more or trying to argue against him. Or even trying to respond to his insults. The wizard has definitely been called worse, but I don’t remember another npc as ungrateful as the superpower representatives on Novus. And i think it warrants a different response from the wizard. I’m really scratching my head at how they can respond the way they do, with everything they know and Dasein supposedly being their trusted friend (or significant other, in Ryan’s case LOL).

Anyway I’m really looking forward to seeing how wallaru goes. This is still my fav arc so far because of how it hits so close to home and strikes such a raw nerve for me. I’ve felt SO MUCH because of it, both good and bad. I’ve been frustrated by story delivery mechanics, but it’s still so beautiful to see this story the devs have written. They still hit it out of the park on this one.

And I hope that any devs who are on tumblr see this, because I really want them to know that this arc has meant so much to me personally and it’s been extremely impactful. In the many many years I’ve been playing, no other arc or story in wiz has moved me so deeply and hit so close to home. I’ve finally gotten motivated to get back on top of the game and not just lagging behind by a few worlds. This has been amazing, and I can’t wait to see what the next arc is like.

[banesberry-anomoly]

sorry about this,,, (about sending another ask,,,,)

what are endos and anti endos? i USED to be an anti endo but now i dont know if im anti endo or not.

- @ieaturanium

Sorry this took so long to answer, I was dealing with some other stuff and didnt wanna shortchange an explanation!

So, I'm a mixed origin system and I mainly identify that way because 1. were not entirely sure what the original reason for us becoming a system was, and we think it was multiple things that contributed to it, and 2. We have headmates from all sorts of origins due to being a very large system

And really it can vary! Some endo systems dont remember their trauma, but this isn't true for all of them and assuming can lead to them either trying to dig up trauma that they may not be ready to face or a headmate causing trauma for the system out of spite to prove a point. Ive heard of this happening many times, the former more so than the latter, and its very harmful when anti endos try to push and convince endos that 'Oh you just dont remember your trauma but I still think youre valid!' because of said reasons.

Some may caused by something that could be considered trauma (because trauma is nuanced and varies from person to person, it all just depends on how the brain reacts to something) but because of the nature of what it is the person either doesnt consider it to be trauma for whichever reason or feels more comfortable identifying as an endo sys. Stressgenic is one of those examples.

And then some may just not be caused by trauma at all, like willogenic systems or people that have 'artists muses' (aka their characters will write themselves or talk to them). There are many forms of plurality because it is a wide and varied experience, and not all of them are talked about. Artists muses tend to be the most common example. But not everyone knwos about or wants to self identify as plural, and thats totally fine!

Something I need to put an emphasis on is endo systems can still *have* trauma, and it could still cause headmates to form/split/etc, it just wasnt the original cause of their becoming a system. Just because someones an endo system doesnt automatically make them immune to experiencing traumas in the future that may or may not affect their plurality.

A lot of systems may have been affected and caused by their neurodivergence in some way, like us with our autism and wildly untreated BPD, and we had a lot of ""non standard"" trauma when we was younger which would probably get us fakeclaimed regardless. We dont feel comfortable fully identifying as traumagenic though for various reasons, including how toxic some of the community can be

The anti endo community doesnt only target endo systems, theres a lot that also target pro endo traumagenic systems for the same reasons. "Endos are hurting Traumagenic systems!!!!!!!" but then they go after those that support endos and its like wow, way to support the people you claim to protect. Ive seen traumagenic systems get their own trauma fakeclaimed and called an endo system as a 'justification' for getting harrassed

Endo systems have been fighting for the system community for *years*, dating back to around the 80s or 90s iirc, and so many terms come from endogenic parts of the community (like fictive and factive are two prominent examples!). Endos and pro endos provide sources in internet arguments arguing about their existence only to be ignored or told 'THOSE SOURCES ARENT VALID SOURCES!!!!!' even when theyre medically backed studies

Ive also seen anti endos argue on The Future Is Plural! posts because they think they want more children to be traumatized. This is not anywhere near case or point, which is to fight for more plural acceptance and make it a safer environment for people to explore their own plurality without getting harrased or judged for it

And just to clarify, I dont mind endo neutrals or people willing to learn interacting with me, as Im willing to help educate how I can! Just be respectful and anyone falling under those categories can stick around ^_^^

[ganondoodle]

feeling much better now having gotten some sleep (the dont trust how you feel about yourself past 9pm is good advice no joke)

of course all my criticism of totk still applies but im feeling less depressed about it, tho i will say its honestly kinda baffling how many times the game actually got me interested and excited about stuff and then just kinda drops it in a dead end, of course they were those kind of things in botw as well but it seems much less .. balanced in totk

(not even just the big things like making me want to actively do something to help zelda turn back when it just gets solved on its own in the end, but also some lil things like the fact that so many NPCs tell you about that newly discovered animal species and when you find the dongos they are just gem vending maschines)

in the end i can say, no, i dont like totk, tho i still love the graphics and the way the world is made ( botw showed me jsut how immersive and alive a world can feel i love it to death), i liked the gameplay and that it kept the freedom botw had established, the bossfights are mostly fun (tho i wish you could refight more of them), i LOVE the yiga and im glad they got more of a spotlight, the music is FANTASTIC i keep catching myself humming along, alot of the sidequests are much bigger and feel like you are actually doing something, i like how the sages are a bit more integrated into the story, the majority of the new designs are great, both the japanese and german voice acting is great, and the end fight has some of the best build up i have ever experienced, my heart starts to race when that music build up starts even tho i have beaten it 3 times already-

however, the story is both simple and incredible flat with lots of stuff that doesnt make sense especially when it was said to be a sequel, the zonau should have stayed a mystery imo, they failed to make me care about them even a little bit and often felt forcefully crammed into the world and its history, i think you could have told an incredible story taking place in the present and leave the past be the past, you easily could have connected botw and totk in a much better way than they did, i dont like how it changes aspects about botw all the while nigh ignoring it ever happened, it still feels like it was trying to be a replacement and not a sequel and all the referencing and callbacks to the old titles may have been done in good faith but that and including time travel yet again ultimately lead to people ripping each other to shreds over trying to prove its placed in the old timeline despite it making no sense at all and confusing people even more; often when the game made me care or be excited about something it was dropped in a dead end, there was a ton of missed opportunities and lost potential to tell a much more nuanced and interesting story/lore, and thinking about it only makes me sad for the things that could have been

overall i think my disappointment is outweighing my fun and the only way i can keep playing it while having fun is ignoring everything that isnt, which works quite well most of the time since im pretty much done with all story stuff but i keep slipping into my little rants nonetheless; i will say its making me a little worried about the future of the franchise, but i know im in the minority and maybe i will just have to accept that the new stuff wont be for me anymore and i should not hope for anything that interests me xD

except for some meme material or specific characters i love i dont think i will make much use of anything totk tried to establish, and i hope thats fine with the lot of you (<3) hopefully that also means my ranting days are over xD

anyway, back to making niche art i go! (sorry for making you endure these long ass rambling posts :,) )