#there's a lot that doesn't really come through in rp sometimes just due to how she processes things

[brodorokihousuke]

Brodoroki's Big-Ass Post of Apollo Character/Plot Headcanons

because I said I was gonna do it, and by god i'm going to commit. and commit I did. this is 1.7k words long. on-brand for me tbh

I'll probably make a subpage of my blog to post this in a... more refined manner? I'll definitely do as much for my RP blogs. But having it as a post is nice too.

I will note that a lot of these things have barely any backing canonically. It's just what I've come up with over the years. Additionally this is subject to change or gain additions.

ALSO spoilers for all of AA456.

PLOT-RELATED HEADCANONS:

Pre-AA4

Thanks to him being sent to America on his lonesome, as well as his own eventual assumptions regarding the situation, Apollo has fairly intense problems related to being abandoned by, separated from, or otherwise losing people he is close to.

Partially due to this, those that he comes to see as role models often gain a sort of parental status to him, maybe a little more quickly than they should.

He has problems making new friends, thanks to how prickly and focused on his own things he tends to be.

Clay was his only friend, pretty much up until he was hired into the WAA. (yess i know capcom just doesn't care to mention the other ones he probably had but I chose to imagine it this way)

Clay is also the only person he willingly spoke with about his past in Khura'in. Due to this, he was also the one to help him through adjusting to America, on a language/accent/cultural basis.

Apollo is likely at least decent acquaintances with Clay's father, but isn't that close. They're at least on good terms.

Figured out how the bracelet worked much earlier than implied in the games. Has a rather deep curiosity regarding the object's origins (much stronger than the curiosity regarding the identity of his biological parents).

He can take his bracelet off, it just requires at least one person to help him pull it off.

AA4

Because of the parental thing noted above, Apollo saw Kristoph as at least a father-adjacent figure, up until his arrest... but the familial connection wasn't something he could completely get rid of. So, up until whenever Kristoph is executed (assuming that ever happens), Apollo visits and speaks to him in prison. Phoenix is never told about this, nor is anyone else. Even Clay wasn't aware.

He had a much brighter and cheerfully energetic personality prior to his first trial, but the brutal reality of everything that happened on that day turned him a bit bitter. He does still show that side of himself sometimes, but only rarely.

After Turnabout Corner, the Kitakis and Apollo (and the WAA in general) stay on good terms. Wocky assumes he and Apollo are great friends, though Apollo probably thinks less... Anyways, the office often receives gifts of baked goods from their bakery, due to this.

While Apollo did consider Phoenix to be a sort of parental figure fairly quickly, him being a cryptic asshole for the entirety of the game was not lost on him. At least until the start of AA6, his feelings on the man remain mixed, though he refuses to talk to him on the matter.

He is, however, at least happy to be part of some sort of family unit.

Since Apollo really had no guardian of sorts, Kristoph had been listed on many of his emergency contact forms. Thanks to a mix of not immediately liking Phoenix and forgetfulness, Apollo never really ended up changing it. Of course, since having a contact in prison doesn't really work... his contact, unbeknownst to anyone involved, has defaulted to, of course... Klavier.

AA5

Phoenix's attitude change was initially met with extreme distrust by Apollo, which wasn't helped by the sudden appearance of Athena (whom Wright had apparently been working with for a while now). Apollo and Athena likely talked about it at least once after the latter sensed the annoyance in his voice and cornered him about it.

Even though it's implied that no one met Clay before his death, Apollo likely introduced him to everyone at least once, with the guy maybe occasionally stopping in to the WAA.

Took off from work (the first time in months) to watch the rocket launch. Which ended up, of course, being a rather poor idea.

Since he's basically alone, couldn't take his bracelet off (see note in pre-AA4). Hence, eye bandage. He likely figured out the silly depth perception (?) thing by accident at some point, so knew that was his only option.

Aura likely pulled him aside while he was investigating to speak about the case, slowly easing into his opinion regarding Athena. They continued to occasionally speak over the next few days, meeting every time Apollo visited the space center.

Prevented himself from grieving at all before everything was over. Barely let himself rest as he didn't want to give himself any time to think about it.

As the bombing happened, Apollo was standing with his back to the explosion, though was thrown on top of Juniper as a result of the blast. His injuries included various burns and flesh wounds (shown below), as well as internal bruising, general bruising, and possible fractures/contusions.

(ignore the jank anatomy. all i meant for that to be was a diagram ngl)

Spent about half the day in the hospital before getting himself (against everyone's wishes) discharged early. He was absolutely in an excessive amount of pain, but as with his grief, he refused to let himself deal with it until everything was over.

Getting knocked out the following day gave him a concussion. It made his memories of the preceding days murky at best, as well as causing him to act with more irritability and less focus.

He was put in the hospital again, of course. By evening, he was out once more.

At the end of his testimony in Turnabout for Tomorrow, when Phoenix finally proves that Athena absolutely did not kill Clay/that the culprit is Fakebright, Apollo relaxes, gives a very genuine thanks to his boss, before collapsing at the stand. He reached his goal, after all, and let himself give in to all the pain and exhaustion he felt... while scaring the shit out of everyone in the courtroom.

His bandages stay on for the next two months, to some degree. For at least the next month, Phoenix just about forces him to take a vacation, with even a (probably not serious) threat to fire him if he finds out he's doing any work.

Sort of assumes everyone in the WAA hates him for a bit after the game ends.

Apollo grows closer to Klavier after the game ends, wanting a friend to fill the hole that Clay left who also isn't a WAA member. Whether their relationship is entirely friend-level or romantic-level depends on my thoughts at the time... but they are at least good friends who meet once a week to talk over things.

As an extension of this, Apollo may at some point speak to Klaiver regarding his past in Khura'in, just needing someone to speak about it with.

Speaking of his past, Apollo briefly gets incredibly hopeful/desperate for Dhurke to show up after the end of the game. With Clay gone, he longs for the man who raised him, to just spill his guts about all his issues, to be comforted fully. He feels awkward thinking about talking to Phoenix on a personal level, and he doesn't want to break down in front of his closest non-coworker friend (Klavier). Of course, this never happens, and Apollo soon grows bitter regarding his past once more.

Scars from the bombing cover his arms and some other spots. Prefers long sleeves afterwards, as he doesn't like to look at them or explain them.

AA6

Apollo still keeps up with news regarding Khura'in, just barely. He also practices writing and speaking the related language, enough to stay fairly fluent.

At least one keepsake from the country was also kept, even though Dhurke hadn't been fond of the idea. While still bitter about his whole situation, Apollo has kept it safe this entire time. Not sure what exactly it is, but it's likely something deeply personal. Maybe a little craft or carved figure Dhurke gave him? An eagle, maybe, since I've implied that's one of his favorite animals.

Athena and Trucy likely picked up Apollo's prickly-ness regarding Khura'in at least once, though he always refuses to explain himself. While they stop asking after a certain point, they're definitely curious.

This curiosity becomes much stronger after the incredibly suspect behavior of both him and Nahyuta during the Magical Turnabout. Both men absolutely had odd tics and tones to their voices while speaking to one another during the trial, and with the ladies being both the co-counsel and defendant, they'd get a front-row seat to it all.

Given the comments Apollo & Nahyuta make to one another at the end of the trial, along with everything else, they can assume the two were very close at some point in time, early in life. Athena and Trucy likely talk in private to speculate on this (and might drag Phoenix or even Blackquill into the conversation).

While the games leave it pretty vague, I do think Apollo genuinely considers Nahyuta and Dhurke (and sort of Datz, in a weird uncle sort of way) to be family. Vice versa, as well. While Dhurke's death leaves him devastated, he's happy to be in contact with the two others, as well.

Building upon something mentioned above, even though they really barely talk about it in-game, the occurrence of Dhurke Dying not even a year after Clay leaves him in shambles. After the decision to stay in Khura'in, he quickly starts to regret his decision, breaking down in front of Nahyuta after the latter checks on him, when he doesn't leave his room for an entire day. They have a very long, serious but heartfelt talk about both of their lives, and their hardships, and everything. It lasts hours, and is emotionally taxing on the both of them, but leaves them more accepting of everything that has happened as of late.

Actually remembers when that one photograph of him, Dhurke and Nahyuta was taken, even if barely. It was the first time he had seen a camera, at least a modern one.

MSC. HEADCANONS

Likes spicy food.

Knows a few low level magic tricks, thanks to Trucy teaching him.

Would rather be busy than idle. Troubling thoughts bother him more when he has nothing to do. Thanks to this, he didn't mind offhandedly doing chores around the WAA... but he started to get annoyed when people started to expect such a thing from him 24/7.

Favorite season is fall. Summer is a close second.

Frequently gets too little sleep, though it doesn't seem to adversely affect him...

...though it does make him prone to napping in odd places.

Doesn't like coffee. If he's drinking anything, it's tea.

Low tolerance to alcohol. Barely drinks it anyways.

Favorite animal is some sort of eagle or hawk.

Okay at cooking.

Bi, demiromantic. Never has been in a relationship before the games.

[utilitycaster]

the imogen and ashton of c3e78 is soooo juicy like everything you said about imogen looking into ashton’s thoughts is so real but also in the group she is the only one who can do that. she’s the only one who can see directly what they feel and think and the fact that it mollifies her rage but almost seems to heighten her frustration? ashton and imogen have my fav dynamic in c3 bc of their understanding of pain and how they reflect each other’s selfishness (if that makes sense) and im so excited to see how (if?) this moment becomes anything More

Hey anon, I'm glad you liked their conversation and presumably my analysis, but I have to admit there's a lot in here either I don't follow, or which I can't say I agree with:

FCG can also look into Ashton's mind and chooses not to (slash, might not have the spell slots left for it due to the healing), instead talking through it - and in doing so they jump to some incorrect conclusions, but also I think have a very important conversation and eventually do come to a deeper understanding, and I still think it would be good for Imogen to talk instead of jump to Detect Thoughts.

With that said, I think she is justified given how extreme the situation was, and it's not terribly surprising that looking into Ashton's mind affects Imogen this way! As others have discussed, Imogen tends to judge people based on thoughts rather than actions (eg: reading people's thoughts alone and judging their overall morality from that moment rather than how they behave). I think part of what made this incident different is because she actually processed the combination of intent and action, rather than only intent. I think the fact that it wasn't pure self-aggrandizement and that their thought patterns of trying to connect with absent parents did both mollify her but also frustrate her, because she felt the same thing and she brought it to the party, who told her in no uncertain terms that the Vanguard sucked. She can intimately understand how they feel and also be furious at what they did as a result.

It was a great conversation between them, and I really enjoy whenever Imogen and Ashton interact, and longer RP moments between members of Bells Hells can sometimes be hard to find, but I have to be honest: I've found the fandom's perception of Imogen and Ashton's friendship and the basis of their shared experiences of pain to be vastly overblown. Notably, I found it was often really overstated before episode 70, when they had their great conversation after their time at All-Minds-Burn, because that was their first real talk that wasn't a group chat or Imogen (consensually) probing his memories, so while it's less baseless now, until a few months ago a lot of people acted like they had talked when they really hadn't. (This is true for several Bells Hells friendships tbh).

I also think that the physical drawbacks of Imogen's abilities are similarly vastly overblown; "Migraine Buddies" or what have you is almost pure fanon. Imogen has had like three canon headaches, and one of them was pretty directly tied to the events of the solstice. People just really latched onto her initial characterization and stopped paying attention. That doesn't mean it's not a consideration for her, or at least that it was before she got the circlet! But because she so rarely used the ability that triggered them I understand her best as someone who used to have a chronic condition who had it well-controlled, though with some effort, prior to the campaign, and now has since had a radical new treatment that effectively removes the need for effort. It's still obviously a factor for her; but Imogen's abilities always felt rather more like severe sensory processing issues, or a migraine disorder but one where she could relatively easily avoid triggers vs. Ashton's chronic pain.

I think some of why this fanon arose is because people wanted to project onto Imogen based on those one or two early mentions of headaches, before Ashton's disability was confirmed, and it never really got addressed and so they assumed similarities and kinship between Imogen and Ashton on a basis that was heavily projected. I agree that they have a lot in common - a cynical worldview and low expectations of others; a combination of lack of self-regard that wraps around into self-absorption (the ugly truth of self-loathing is that it is also self-centered and can still hurt others even while also hurting one's self); the above parallels between their parents. I agree that I'd love to see them interact more (thought I'm not sure if by "More" you mean an actual friendship or what) - I think the post-solstice onset arc has really allowed Laura to do what she does best for Imogen now that she's not constantly in the spotlight, and the remaining gap is that her interpersonal relationships with many party members are somewhat lacking - but it's hard to call it my favorite dynamic when it's only just being developed. And for what it's worth, going back to the first point, I think a lot of similar parallels can be found between Ashton and FCG, who do have a more developed dynamic.

[ladyduellist]

✨Writing Interview Tag Game✨

Tagged by: @roguishcat @busy-baker @preciouslittlebhaalbae

Thanks guys! I really adored some of your answers on your own interview questions.

When did you start writing?

Sometime when I was kid. I wrote a lot up into my teenage years, creating stories and poetry—even taking creative writing courses—but then dropped it. I picked up writing sometime back in 2016 when I started to RP in FFXIV, but didn't take it seriously. However, for the last year, I have been full speed ahead in a way I never have before!

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

I like to weave in nonfiction books such as history, art, or autobiography/biography into my reading rotation to keep my brain sharp. However, I wouldn't scoff at writing about some of those subjects!

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

I don't get compared to other writers to my knowledge, but I've been told many times that my work takes on a very lyrical/poetic approach! This is probably due to the fact that when I was growing up, I used to habitually read Shakespeare, Homer, and other classic lit authors in my spare time. So, the influence from their writing has absolutely influenced my own.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

I wish I had a fancier space to write in that has all these cute aesthetics surrounding a desk, but I typically write on my phone or I'm on the couch using my gaming laptop.

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

Observing life, art, pictures, the outdoor world. I'm a big daydreamer, so I'm constantly sifting through details in my head.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

I think my major reoccurring theme has to be working through life and trying to find your way through it while healing and connecting with others.

Human beings are complex creatures when it comes to our actions or thoughts, so I like to keep that in mind while I write. One of the main thoughts that passes through my head when I'm writing about a character is: no matter how many times I can say I wouldn't behave or say some of the things they do, you really don't know until you're in their shoes.

I really love peeling character's layers back to dig into everything they are.

I’m sure people will notice I also tend to gravitate towards using a lot of religious imagery or symbolism in my works. Religion and spirituality, in some fashion, has been with me from the day I was born. People do both good and bad things with their devotion and I find it therapeutic to explore these ideas in my writing to wrestle my own thoughts on the subject.

What is your reason for writing?

I have to put all these idea somewhere! But, I just like it. Writing makes me feel good and helps me to challenge myself and my imagination. It's fun and I'm so grateful I've found it again!

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

Literally all comments—even if it's just a bunch of emojis. I just feel beyond fortunate anytime someone reads my work and let's me know they did!

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

I tend to be a quiet person in real life, so I hope my readers will think of me as an authentic and genuine person that's just looking to share her creativity with the world.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

Descriptions and feelings. I could write on for days about both of those!

Dialogue is one I want to get better at as it doesn't come naturally to me.

How do you feel about your own writing?

I think every writer is their own worst critic. There have been chapters I've released that I don't like and readers have expressed it was their favorite or I've written pieces that I'm unsure of, but has probably demonstrated my best writing.

But, I try to keep in mind that writing is full of seasons. You're always progressing, improving, and changing what you know about yourself in that regard. You adjust as you go. You educate yourself as you go. Give yourself grace and understanding. Writing will always be there when you wish to use it.

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?

A think its a mix of both in some regard. Yes, I'm writing for myself—these are my ideas after all—but I also have to keep my readers interested somewhat in what they're reading. Always write for yourself first and foremost, but don't take your audience for granted if you want them to stick around!

[wedriftlikelonelyplanets]

🍓🧃🧸🪲

🍓 - How did you get into writing fanfiction?

ALRIGHT SO I've been involved in the online RP community since I was like 15-ish...i think? Anyhow, I've been writing for literal years. I am, however, incredibly self-conscious about my own writing. I've dwelled in many a fandom space as well, honestly.

After getting into F1, I've felt like I've been kinda on the outskirts of a community I really love (not on the outskirts for a negative reason, I'm just incredibly shy and worry that I'm annoying), and it's given me kinda...I guess a little burst of confidence. I wrote my first fic after the Hungarian Grand Prix of this year because there was just...something SO COMPELLING about the dynamic between Lando and Oscar during/after that race. Since THEN I haven't been able to stop, and I've really been loving being a part of this community.

That, and the fact that the stuff that I've written has been so well received has made me more comfortable to continue writing within a fandom space.

🧃 - Share some personal lore you've never shared before

OKAY WELL THEN...Idk there's a lot I blab about on the internet so I've gotta think about this one.

I have what is probably undiagnosed hEDS (hypermobile ehlers-danlos syndrome), and likely never will be diagnosed because I'm a fat, female presenting woman. This means I experience a lot of chronic pain, and actually deal with regular shoulder subluxations that put a damper in my ability to do my job sometimes

Despite being an elder emo, I've never actually been to a music festival, despite my longing and desire. This is primarily in part due to the fact that I live in a small city in Canada that doesn't really get a lot of fun music in general

I blab about this a lot, but I'm a Registered Veterinary Technologist, and have been for 5 years, and I'm likely going back to school to actually become a vet, because I finally found a clinic that makes me love my job again!!

🧸 - what's the fastest way to become mutuals with me?

UH GREAT QUESTION. I guess interact with me, chat with me, my askbox AND my messages are always open. I don't specifically mean you need to like and comment on my fics, but like...interact with my content. I love to yap, give advice, and just chat. I've dealt with a sudden influx of followers since starting to write fanfic (this is not said to sound vain), and I feel like I can no longer just follow people willy-nilly anymore. Honestly I often do click through to the blogs of new followers, but I sometimes just get overwhelmed.

Hell, even if you just message me and are like "this song made me think of x, y and z" i'd love you forever.

And interact of anon. I love all of you darling anonymous folks that come into my ask box but i want to stroke your faces lovingly and reblog things from your tumblrs and I can't do that when I don't know who you are.

🐞 - Using this in place of the other beetle BECAUSE IT DOESN'T WORK ON MY PC but - Write 50 words for your current work in progress and then post that paragraph here

I see what you're doing, anon, keeping me on task and also getting some snippets out of me...(such a mean trick to play...jk)

“More?” Lando asks, and Oscar shakes his head. Lando places the mug back on the tray, reaches out to brush Oscar’s hair back from his face again, fingers catching in the tangled strands. Oscar leans into the touch, presses his cheek against Lando’s palm, presses a kiss to the inside of his wrist where he can reach it. Just a brush of his lips, softer than soft. It should feel infantilizing, to be cared for like this, but it soothes the part of him that makes him feel like he always has to be calm and collected, always in control

THIS IS MORE THAN 50 WORDS, MERRY CHRISTMAS.

[ashsocsandrps]

BASIC INFO

Name: Oliver Valentine

Gender: Male

Place of Birth: Somewhere in Oregon

Religion / Belief: not religious

Year (Age): 19

Birthday: 10/9/04

Death: 10/10/2024

Preferred Title/nickname: Val

LIKES & DISLIKES

Personality: Hes kind, sometimes a little crazy, and paranoid/anxious, yet hes also very clueless he tends to forget things a lot, and very easily. its most likely from pushing down what happened to him deep down.

Likes: he likes painting, finger painting, listening to music. and running.

Dislikes: he hates the ocean, he def has beef with the anglers.

APPEARANCE - BEFORE EXPERIMENTS

Hair Colour: black

Eye Colour: green

Skin Colour: white/pale

Body Type: skinnier but with a bit of chubbiness to his bones

Scars: none

Hand Size: skinny hands, longer nails

Genetic Conditions / Disabilities: red birth marks on his hands and chest

APPEARANCE - AFTER EXPERIMENTS

Hair Colour: white

Eye Colour: red

Skin Colour: a pink shade

Body Type: skinnier but with a bit of chubbiness to his bones

Scars: scars all over his body, from the constant experiments.

Hand Size: skinny hands, longer nails

Genetic Conditions / Disabilities: his red birth marks turned into a light pink, still in the same places. A slightly different shade from his skin color

NEW BODY: His skin was a light pink, just like those pink dolphins, with random white/black spots just like an orca whale. His back had a small shark fin coming out of his uniform. Fins as ears, just like a lil fish. and gills the the sides of his ribs

EXTRASENSORY

Smells like: he smells like caramel. surprisingly not like fish, due to him living in the ocean.

Feels like: his skin is rugged, due to the scars.

EMOTIONAL

Common Expressions: His usual expression had a worried look, the constant anxiety was rushing through his body just made him an anxious mess.

Most Common Mood:

Happy when: he happy when he finds new things in the rooms he explores, he usually just finds files and stuff, but he LOVES wen he finds new flashlights and toys.

Sad when: Hes usually sad/anxious, but he normally forgets why.

Afraid of: the ocean, he stays as far away from the windows and keeps headphones in his ears to drown out the sounds from outside.

FAMILY

Mother: REDACTED

Father: REDACTED

Parent Jobs (if any): REDACTED

Siblings: REDACTED

Notable Family Members: REDACTED

Family Home: REDACTED

Related Families: REDACTED

Family Wealth: REDACTED

Upbringing: REDACTED

FRIENDS

Best Friend: REDACTED

Childhood Friends: REDACTED

Friends Currently: none

Strained Friendships: REDACTED

Type of Friend: He tends to forget who the people are when he sees them again, he barely even remembers REDACTED name.

Willingness to Make Friends: Mid

Become their friend by: giving him random things, he may forget but he will love you for it.

Favourite gifts from friends: He doesn't remember who it was, but he got a gummie flashlight, he loves the green light

ENEMIES

Enemies (if any): REDACTED

How to become disliked by character: Stealing from him, touching him, hurting him. he usually doesn't remember tho.

How enemies are treated: He doesn't remember the people who do him wrong.

Be forgiven by: giving him things, even if its a few files, he loves buying random things from Sebastian when he sees him.

Worst thing done by enemy: He was experimented on, and heavily injured. He hates the workers/scientists who did this to him. making him into a monster.

LINKS

Pinterest Board: none (for now)

Spotify Playlist:

RP Blog (if any): https://www.tumblr.com/ashsocsandrps?source=share

Faceclaim: unknown

Voiceclaim: Angsty Teen (fnaf)

Handwriting font:

Character inpirations: pressure oc!!

This is a really bad drawing of him, I tried my best but it's just horrible 🥲

[b3ast0fburd3n]

Rules since I seem to change these once a month, you're allowed to ignore new ones if we were mutuals before they came up.

I only rp with one Vaas. @/badtrigger

I block freely and don't feel ashamed about it. If you're uncomfortable with my content or me, please use that beautiful button.

Due to the nature of my blog, we're MDNI here. PLEASE do not interact with my posts if you're under 18, it makes me insanely uncomfortable.

I rarely trigger tag. If you see my posts often and need something tagged, LET ME KNOW! I have few triggers myself but I used to have a lot more, I understand how upsetting it can be.

Don't even think about following me if you don't understand why someone would explore these topics in fiction. Mun =/= Muse. Obviously I don't condone their actions or beliefs.

Having said all that in a very confident tone, I can now say that I am not a confident person! I push through a lot of nerves to start interactions, because I know a lot of people have issues with that. but I am BEGGING you to PLEASE tell me if I did something wrong or if I upset you. I'm always malleable to changing things up, especially if it upset someone! I'm still new to this, too, so I might use a term wrong or something. Let me knoowww pleeasseee

I ask that you not reblog roleplay threads you're not part of or character promos. Likes and comments are welcomed and appreciated on all posts (even if I don't respond)

I usually follow if I'm interested in rping with you. If you follow back, I'll take that as you're interested as well and I'll reach out to you.

My muses are mean sometimes! They're far cry ocs, cmon now. You are more than welcome to give them the same energy. I just ask that we, as the Muns, try to get along! Just because our characters are at each others throats doesn't mean that we can't joke about them making out.

Shipping is WELCOMED. Most (if not all) my characters are bi/pan in some capacity and I can see each of them with several different kinds of people. I ask that you not force ships, however. If you think our muses would be good together (as friends, lovers, hatefuckers, whatever!!) lmk! I love all kinds of dynamics and relationships, I really can't think of one I'd be opposed to other than illegal shit.

pleasepleaseplease don't control my characters. 'godmodding' has been the bane of my existence since middle school. I do what I can to make sure our interactions (especially violent ones) are even while still being in character. I have noticed, though, that some of my characters are awfully inclined to back down if conversation swings towards violence. I'm not afraid to rp fights, but I ask that we plot how it will end beforehand, so I can know what direction to head for.

I like to start character interactions with first meetings. It gives us the chance to get to know each other while our characters do.

Crossovers: Mostly good with them! Other characters in far cry is great. Depending on the fandom I might be willing to build an AU to interact. idk, hasn't come up yet! I will say, though, that my anime phase ended before high school. I've got nothing against it, I just don't like it myself anymore. I probably won't interact with anime characters, oc or canon.

I match length (and often, more) but I don't expect others to. Life is busy, you can't always write out a long reply. As long as your response as some kind of action or sentence to be responded to, don't worry about it!

Questions, quick asks, one-liners and such are always open! I prefer longer interactions, but these can be really fun too!

Overall, I came here to share my creations and make friends. Thank you for reading my rules :))

[nxmeolvides]

GET TO KNOW THE MUN ! (under the readmore)

what made you pick up the muse you have ? : I have a deep love for horror, and specifically sibling narratives within it: due to personal reasons, working on a muse that's a younger sibling is a comforting process for me. And honestly, Ana just has had a grip on me since I first started playing the game. I jumped on around September, and she wasn't that common a pick yet, which let me get completely attached to her. My initial brush with the game fandom was through fanart, and her attacking Johnny was the first thing I did - I have a lot of thoughts on them and how they're both driven, arguably, by family that I won't get into. But that's definitely part of what drew me in. And then it grew and grew, and I chickened out of making a blog for her I'd say maybe three times? Tumblr rp intimidated me! But I joined a discord server, and then another one, and threw all the headcanons I'd already been chewing on into her. Skip forward a few months, and I'm here. And I love her dearly. She is truly one of my favourite characters I've found in a long while - even if by this point, she's at least half my oc. But she's my beautiful, resiliant girl, that has a hard time letting down walls and sacrifices too much but has so much love to give, and I really hope to write here for a lot longer.

is there anything you really enjoy writing ? : I adore hurt/comfort above everything else. It lets me really dig into a character's feelings and their layers, and character analysis is probably one of my favourite things to do with reading/writing? So yeah! Love hurt/comfort. And finding dynamics where my characters will feel safe, and exploring those. Love love love.

is there anything you don't like to write ? : I'd say the majority of what tends to come under "dead dove." It just doesn't appeal to me - don't mind reading headcanons, but I don't want my own characters to be violated.

how do you come up with your headcanons ? : Finding media that reminds me of my muses! I love to just single out a couple movies - usually horror right now, for Ana,- and sit and watch them, and develop hcs off whatever floats into my mind. It helps me keep a grip on my characterisation, as well, which I feel like I struggle with a lot. Outside of that, it's just sitting with a friend and brainrotting it out, since I tend to second guess a lot of my own ideas. Even if the other person doesn't say much, just getting to bounce it off someone helps me a lot to knuckle down and iron everything out.

do you write in silence or listen to music ? : It varies! I'm usually either listening to music, sitting in silence, or have a tv show or movie playing in the background.

do you plan your replies or wing them ? : I try to have an intial plan in mind, and then just kind of wing it through that if it's a longer reply that's cooking. And then with those, I usually go back and edit and change my mind so much that the outcome or characterisation is pretty different to how I intended! But it works out eventually.

do you enjoy shipping ? : Absolutely! But it is completely dependant on chemistry. I have ships I'll always be partial to, but even if I talk about them a lot I'm not going to head into an interaction expecting something to happen. Every portrayal is different, and the vibes always vary. But when it does work out, yes. I love just being able to write a little fluff drabble of a character being happy. Smooches are cute. Love is cute. I'm a sap.

what's your alias / name? : Piper! sometimes Cherry, but mainly Piper. Chose it when I was... 15? And it's stayed since!

zodiac sign ? : Saggitarius, and I don't know shit about astrology to say the rest!

Birthday? : Dec 14th

favorite color ? : So many shades of pink. SO many. Right now, particularly like... a deepish, reddish pink. It appeals to me.

favorite song? : Impossible to answer! Depends on the hour of the day. I'm currently enjoying a lot of Sabrina Carpenter and Olivia Rodrigo though - I'm a sucker for pop.

last movie you watched ? : No clue!

last show you watched?: Yellowjackets! Rewatched some of it on the train. I love my cannibal lesbians.

last song you listened to? : Seventeen by Ladytron, thanks to spotify shuffle.

favorite food ?: I have a horrific weak spot for gnocchi.

favorite season ? : Spring <3 Everything's starting to come into bloom and it's not too hot.

do you have a tumblr best friend ? : I don't think so? I'm still new here! But Des and Sawyer are discord buddies and dear to me ♡

TAGGED BY : Stolen from the dashboard.

TAGGING : Anyone!

[fightaers]

what has sakura been up to post 4th war. again, these are all my personal headcanons and details are subject to change with each respective rp partner(s) i am interacting with !

# — due the villages aspiring for a more diplomatic connection, sakura hops from village to village to assist in tending to the wounded — or what’s left of them. she organises a nation-wide standardisation on how to deal, clean, assess, and manage hospitals and/or clinics all around. it takes her a while, i can imagine she’s gone from eight months to a year ( on and off ) before she fully returns and resides back in konoha.

#— i know canon fast-forwards a lot of stuff, but i imagine the preparation for kakashi's inauguration as the sixth wasn’t as quick. so during the few months of stabilisation wherein the leaf is still under the fifth, sakura is diagnosed with “battle fatigue” ( another name for PTSD because they didn’t have a proper name for it during this time ) by tsunade, and was prescribed medication.

# — in my interpretation, she’s clinically depressed. she changes her medication ( at this point, she self-medicates since she notices the medicine prescribed by tsunade wasn’t working ) after reading some research on it — there isn’t much, she has to go through archives — about a year in, by concocting the pills herself. she did enlist some help, mostly botanist experts, pharmacists, possibly a form of psychologist or therapist (which were rare, and i can imagine coming from another village) and trusted a colleague leading or assisting on the research about her progress. this way, she avoids overdosing. no, she doesn’t tell her friends about the diagnosis nor the medication. her parents are aware of this, however.

# — some of the symptoms she would've shown: a feeling of restlessness, excessive guilt, experiences extreme fatigue ( that she mistakens simply because she does not sleep well ) which can cause her to sleep at random hours. she also becomes unresponsive and experiences lack of interest in normal and/or everyday routine i.e. when ino asks her to hang out and she just seems mentally absent. for a while before her diagnosis, sakura never cleans her bedroom. she doesn't think much of it since she isn't there a lot anyhow except to sleep, and she doesn't care to. it'll take her a while to really look back and understand that that's not laziness.

# — this is just a light-hearted headcanon but, sakura’s mental health improves around her family so, so much. she loves going to her grandfather’s ancestral home near the woods and just spend time with her brother, his family, and her parents. sometimes her civilian extended family joins. she actually doesn’t like them asking nosily about her “shinobi life”, but other than that, she loves the gossips and when they all gather in the kitchen to prepare meals.

# — after the war too, while working shift-by-shift to stabilise the wounded, she attends private funerals ( besides from the mass funeral ) of any family she is invited to. yes, this includes the yamanaka and the nara ( although that was more because she wanted, than invited ). she always finds the time ever since — unless she’s in surgery, or was really needed, then she visits the family after. from that alone, sakura keeps a black dress and/or kimono in her office at all time.

tl;dr — sakura organised a nation-wide standardisation of cleaning and assessing wounds among several villages, an effort which lasted from eight months to a full year. shortly before kakashi's inauguration as the sixth, sakura was diagnosed with battle fatigue, and was given medication. because the medication didn't improve her condition, she sought out to research and concoct a set of pills herself. mostly though, you can find her working in the hospital, or getting ready to embark in her research into battle fatigue, battle trauma, and post-battle rehabilitation.

[askwalmartniko]

"info, rules, etc." — ooc 1

hello, and thank you so much for stopping by this blog. at first, i was inspired by the retailwatch overwatch rp blogs from years back, so i decided to make a semi-serious one with niko.

as much as this does follow a rather silly baseline with its plot, there are deeper themes that include major spoilers for the game's endings, with inspo with the freeware and remake vers. though, both interactions (in serious or lighthearted nature) are both welcomed.

i'll explain more under the cut, but my main acc is @burdening-light !

entry masterlist

updated concept art

characters you can ask thus far are niko, niko's mom (hazel), and niko's dad (ed)!

what is this blog about?

it details with niko's life as a 16-year-old. they work at walmart to support their family in the city while juggling their highschool courses and hobbies. i do not plan on drawing a whole lot, as i prefer to express more of my thoughts through writing.

what au is this?

this is set after the ending where niko breaks the lightbulb to return home. when they were 13, they moved to the city due to their father needing to stay there for better job proposals. they have repressed the memories of being "the messiah", but once as they start to age and understand more about the situation that they were in, it has affected them too much already.

what is the theme of this blog?

i say "semi-serious" because this is a silly idea, but taken seriously. i will shitpost here and there, but i am comfortable with elaborating on deeper themes such as trauma, coping mechanisms, and simply talking more about growing up while dealing with it all. i'm somewhat projecting onto niko here, but i want this to be someplace safe to discuss these topics.

however, i will do my best to tag these posts accordingly and provide proper trigger warnings if need be.

concept art i have of them so far is here. they go by they/them, as they are most comfortable with that set, and go to a public high school in a city. throughout their life, they seemed to repress their memories and never really seemed to stop and think about what happened back when they were just 8; as they were just so happy to see their family again.

now, with more time, it seemed to have made them think. fortunately enough for them, they are able to distract themselves, as they are part of an art club at the school and work at walmart as a stocker. they decided to make a social media account to really give them something else to do, in the meanwhile.

they are a big fan of drawing, and especially playing games; and can be rather competitive at times. they're into internet culture as well, but haven't interacted as much until now.

niko adores their mom very much, but hates how they seem to not have that much time to hang out. they make food for their neighbours in their apartment complex, but it just doesn't feel the same sometimes. niko's dad is out and about, but they're still on good times; it's just hard to communicate between the two.

other than that, they're leading a rather mediocre life. they are still optimistic and try to be real and grounded with it, since they were raised by their mom; no less. but, it still comes naturally for them to act with integrity, but it feels as if they are trying to prove something to themselves.

rules about asks/interactions

really, i'm fine with anything. as long as it is sfw, i'll do my best to respond. however, i am busy with things irl too, but i'll get to it as soon as possible.

if you want to address the owner, call me fruity or valérie, please!

tags:

#on the clock — 💡 = in-character (niko)

#— 🌾 (niko's mom/hazel) #— ⌨️ (niko's dad/ed)

#on break — 🥞 = ooc

#— ❕ = potential tw

#— 🧇 = silly/lighthearted post

[rorykillmore]

okay these asks are late, but how does villanelle feel about the other people in the anti-grace squad?

villanelle is like. aggressively not a team player in any sense. like, she tends to clash BADLY in collaborative group environments (the last time she was on a team with anyone she intentionally got BOTH her partners killed, so!) so i kind of think the idea of her being on a team made of people she generally likes and gets along with, but her still being villanelle, is... both kind of hilarious and interesting

i’ll start with fox because he’s like, the one person there who villanelle has a deep bond of trust with (as deep as it ever gets with her, anyway) and who she’s proven to be able to, miraculously, work with really effectively. that’s why villanelle like, perpetually considers fox to be her partner even though they’re not OFFICIALLY partners anymore, because he’s really the only person she’s ever had that kind of relationship with. so needless to say, he’s probably the one on the team she could work the most seamlessly with, and have the least number of problems with. but also like! she and fox are the two former GRACE agents on the team! their information and insight is really important which means... the squad obviously has to spread out its resources, and fox and villanelle can’t be paired up all the time. so that’s gonna be.... an adjustment for villanelle, especially since she’s the kind of person who forms this really stubborn, singular, catlike loyalty to people where she has trouble accepting Anyone Else in their place (ie she dug her heels in when the twelve tried to give her a handler that wasn’t konstantin; she’ll probably act similar here if she keeps getting partnered with a person Who Isn’t Fox)

but also she and fox do work UNDENIABLY well together so i’m sure there’ll be some occasions where toffee pairs them up at least for some things,

and then to talk some about toffee, since he’s the guy running the show! villanelle actually quite likes toffee, and he is actually a really efficient boss in the way that he handles her. i’m not sure a lot of people would be able to manage villanelle in a setting like this, but he... knows she’s efficient, and lets her be efficient, and doesn’t really give her a lot of hardline rules to follow beyond “don’t get caught”. so to a certain extent, because he doesn’t try to smother or intimidate or overmanage her, she does trust him.

but also like... villanelle at this point has a long and complicated history with her employers and her experiences with them, so there’s only so much she can trust toffee. even konstantin, who genuinely loves her, is willing to throw her under the bus when he needs to, so how can she expect anything different from toffee? it’s not really personal, she just... understands and expects that he’s hardly going to give up his job and reputation and standing to bail her out of a tight spot if she ever gets stuck in one. just like she would probably turn on him if she had her back against the wall! 

that being her impression of him and their relationship, of course, she’s never quite sure what to do when toffee’s more selfless streaks show themselves or... how genuinely to read that

laurel is someone appreciates just because villanelle finds it relatively easy to understand her, or at least some parts of her. she has a long, criminal history and generally kind of gets... how things work when you’re a dangerous woman operating in a world that’s still inevitably mostly dominated by men. of course they... don’t actually know each other that well yet, and i don’t know how well they’d ultimately be able to work together (guess we’re gonna find out!). villanelle likes laurel and, if she was looking to feel less... empty by chasing after friendships like she’s kind of inclined to do after the whole silver eyes memory incident, laurel would probably be an easy pick because they have apparent similarities that are easy to build on!  but they’re also, at their cores... very different, and villanelle has so many difficulties navigating healthy relationships in the first place that it could get messy. idk. we haven’t done a lot of Meaty stuff with them yet but it’ll be interesting to see what happens!!

and then sun... it’s so funny, because up until the anti-GRACE stuff sun and villanelle had really only had passing interactions in the main icc, and sun was distinctly in the “villanelle tolerates him because he’s friends with team rwby” category and we used to joke about that a lot. but the thing is?? when given a chance to interact more extensively, they do kind of get along?? they’re still very different people, of course, and always will be -- but while villanelle doesn’t really... understand a lot about sun and his open sincerity and loyalty and dedication, he is in a funny sort of way maybe the person i could see her growing to trust the most on the squad besides fox. she definitely has more similarities with laurel and toffee, but that also means she attaches certain inevitably expectations to them and the kind of people they are, while sun... she’s never worked with anyone like sun before. getting to the point where she doesn’t have to question whether he has her back or whether he means everything he says might be difficult because she’s... villanelle, she’s hardly ever had that in her life, but the more time she spends with him, the more she finds she genuinely likes him. so that’s a start!

it’s hard to say anything about lucifer yet because he hasn’t interacted with most of the team, but. needless to say, i think lucifer and villanelle are a combination destined for disaster! in that they could WAY too easily fall into enabling each other’s bullshit, and i’m sorry for everyone around them. it’d be interesting to see how villanelle reacts to... meeting a version of the devil, because she has a particular indifference varying towards disdain for religion that’s kind of subtextualized in a way that would be a LOT to unpack for this particular ask, but i guess i’ll just leave it at “there could be a lot of deeper complications even as they’re having fun with each other on the surface”

and then i don’t know what billy will be involved, but i know you’re at least planning on making him an ally of the group?? which is hilarious given that the only one in it who knows about his secret identity is villanelle. i don’t think she’d be particularly inclined to like... immediately rat him out or anything, especially if he could offer them something useful, but she also. wouldn’t be SUPER dedicated to keeping it a secret if it served her in some way to tell the rest of the group, fair warning. idk billy and villanelle haven’t really interacted outside of that one icc, so we’ll have to see WHAT HAPPENS as far as her more in depth feelings toward him go!

[bukojuiice]

the wedding booth  — eren jaeger

ೃ pairing: (eren jaeger x  fem! reader)

ೃ after being unwillingly dragged to plan and create a wedding booth for your first university festival, eren accompanies you to a bridal boutique. there, he contemplates about the future and all of the cheesy romantic stuff he wants to do with you.

ೃ genre and warnings: college au, lots and lots of fluff!

ೃ  my nav  →  my aot masterlist

ೃ 1k words

My Big Fat Greek Wedding, My Best Friend's Wedding, The Wedding Planner, Wedding Crashers... hell, even Mamma Mia.

If having to be forced to watch these romantic comedies about weddings doesn't give you the sudden urge to get hitched and run away to some tropical island, then you don't know what will.

For your very first uni fair at Shigashina University, your friends had proposed a Marriage booth. To be more specific, three of your friends did. Jean, Sasha, and Connie are the masterminds behind this stupid idea and it's all because of three things:

1. Jean is pining over Mikasa so so bad. So many years have passed and yet he still hasn't found a way to confess. And so, due to his pompous ass binge-watching stupid rom-coms recently, he thinks that if "fake dating" can bring two people together, then having a fake wedding with his unrequited crush of 12 years could finally make her fall for him too. He wants the booth to be as iconic as a wedding straight out of Las Vegas. Problem is, he's never been to Las Vegas, and his terribly unrealistic basis for wanting it to be as iconic as a "Las Vegas Wedding" is that one scene from The Hangover and that episode from Friends.

He was delusional and yet, he wanted to push through with this proposal no matter what. Nothing was going to stop him... not unless it was one of the three seniors whom you would be proposing this project to in the first place.

2. Sasha's goals are much normal. A bit odd, but still normal and not as desperate as Jean's. All she wants is to get Ymir, the captain of the school's soccer team to confess to Historia, the freshman Bio-Chemistry student who works part-time as a library assistant (and whom everyone secretly fawns over for. she's just that damn cute.) However, the real reason as to why she helped [rp[pse this stupid marriage booth to get them to finally confess to each other is anyone's guess.

3. Connie thinks he's gonna get clout from this. Rise up the university hierarchy perhaps? He's treating the entire festival like it's high school all over again. He prays that the marriage booth will become the hottest thing in the festival, then he'll instantly become that cool and bad-ass freshie whom everyone wants to be friends with. Either way, if the booth is going to be a success or not, you know for a fact he's never going to be a part of the "cool kids" (good lord, can you believe people still use that term in college?) and he's gonna be stuck with you and your other friends for the rest of the years to come.

It didn't take long before they finally finished their elaborate PowerPoint Presentation (despite Connie insisting that Powerpoint is boring) that they were going to pitch to three of the principal members of the student council. Namely, Erwin Smith, Levi Ackerman, and Hange Zoe.

It was gonna be an automatic no for Levi, obviously. Nothing could ever get past that man. But if they can somehow convince Erwin and most especially Hange to get on board with their stupid scheme, then the booth was good to go.

Now, here you are, in a bridal boutique. Purchasing some simple wedding dresses that will serve as your rent-a-dress service for the Marriage booth.

It wasn't originally a part of the plan. Not at all.

However, Hange would only approve of the project IF the wedding booth was going to be made into something more elaborate and memorable. They didn't want something as simple as printing out fake marriage contracts, cheap tulle fabric wedding veils, fake plastic bouquets, and wedding pictures that came out of a polaroid camera.

Oh no no no. They wanted it to be extravagant. The cream of the crop. The absolute bomb. The best booth at the festival.

Hange saw potential in the idea and with an approved budget by the student council, you could make anyone's wedding dreams come true.

 Fast forward to a week before the event, you are currently on a shopping spree with Armin, Mikasa, and your boyfriend, Eren (because Sasha insisted he had the right proportions for the rental groom outfits. She totally did not ask him to come along so that he can see you try on wedding gowns.) to buy supplies, props, decorations, and everything else needed.

"(Y/N), we'll meet you and Eren at the bridal boutique, okay?" Armin proclaims, looking at the time on his wristwatch and struggling to balance the shopping bags on his other hand.  Mikasa notices how much he's been struggling and offers to hold the bags for him.

"Sure! Don't forget about the list that Jean sent!" You shout back, turning to Eren as his fingers interlace with yours, making your merry way to the boutique whilst Armin and Mikasa go off the other direction.

"Don't get too excited." You joke, nudging Eren on the arm. "I'll just be trying on these dresses for the booth."

There's a particular glimmer in Eren's emerald eyes, chuckling at your quip. "Sheesh. Did you really have to remind me? Of course I know that. Besides, we're too young to even think about marriage right now. What's important is that I'm spending the best years of my life with you."

"Eren Grisha Jaeger, it is too damn early for you to make me a blushing pile of mess with your flirty comebacks." You deadpan, the heat rising up your cheeks as you try to hide your embarrassment from him.

The both of you laugh it off, shuffling into the store. The chiming bells of the shop door echo around the area as you look in awe at the luxurious dresses occupying every available space. The wafting smell of a vanilla pinecone scent and the soft sound of a sewing machine doing its work. There was a homey and rustic feel to this boutique that made you feel like you were sent back in time.

From great flouncy pieces adorned in layers of lace that rolled like ocean waves to more humble designs, albeit of the finest cloth.

This plethora of finery- reminds you strongly of the many genteel ladies depicted in those books and historic romances you used to read and watch. Like that of Pride and Prejudice or Sense and Sensibility.

Having the opportunity to enter a boutique such as this was a dream.

"Welcome! May I help you find anything?" A seamstress appears from the register. She looks at you from head to toe, as if trying to guess your measurements.

"W-we're looking for wedding dresses. Anything within the 200 to 300 dollar range? We don't need anything extra fancy, though! We'll just be needing them-"

Her eyes shift from you to Eren like she's suddenly a love coach, sizing the two of you up. "Yes, yes, young love! How sweet!" She chirps, breathing out a dreamy sigh. "Of course! For couples on a tight budget, we have-"

"We're looking for wedding dresses that can be used as costumes! Not too short and not too long either. W-we're not getting married or anything." You dismiss the seamstress with a wave of your hand. "I'm sorry if you thought of it that way..."

Although her shoulders visibly drop, the saleswoman still manages to smile. "Oh! I would like to apologize for assuming anything too!"

"Actually, mam, we do have plans sometime in the future." Eren grins cheekily, pulling you close to him. "Not today, of course, but we'll make sure to drop by in a few years!"

The saleslady's eyes lit up at Eren's vow. "Over here are some of our best-selling pieces! Ones that will certainly attract the eye of any groom!" She beckons you over to some mannequins lined up in the middle of the store, your gaze is drawn to the myriad of dresses on display as you walk throughout the space.

You turn back to Eren, studying him closely as he walks a few paces behind you, you thoughtfully wonder if the dresses you would pick out would match his taste.

She leads you to the back of the store to show the other garments and dresses embroidered with simplicity and yet elegance. You then pick two gowns up from their respective racks, satisfied with your purchase and making a beeline to the register to pay. However, the seamstress stops you from your tracks.

"How about this one, dear?"

You turn your attention to her, doe-eyed and curious as to what she was going to show you next.

"It is indeed a wedding dress, although not what you had asked for, the handsome young man did say something about your marriage plans. Perhaps this might help you visualize it? Give you an idea for the future, hm?" She hums wistfully, drawing your attention to the mannequin she placed in front of you. "It would be a shame if you left the boutique without trying anything on."

"(Y/N)?" You hear Eren's husky voice call out for you from the front of the store, "Armin just texted me. They can't find a specific prop in the crafts store so we might have to wait a bit longer for them."

"Okay! We can spare more time in the boutique, anyways." You answer back,  before turning your attention to the seamstress once more.

"Alright. I think I'll try it on then."

"Trying it on" turned out to be more than you had imagined. You thought you could just slip inside the dress and show it off. But nope. You needed a few adjustments to dress, adornments in your hair, and had to wear a wedding veil.

It was almost as if you were actually preparing to be wed.

"Good sir, your lovely missus is ready!" Yup, even the words of the seamstress made you feel like you were living in the 17th century right now. Did she really have to use such fancy words?

"Please, watch your step." The seamstress takes your hand and leads you out of the dressing room and right towards—

Eren who had been waiting in the shop proper.

"Doesn't she look beautiful?" She giggles, glancing at Eren for a response. "Well, I'll leave the two of you here first and bring the dresses you've chosen to the cash register first." In a wink, she's gone and had disappeared into the back almost before the words left her mouth.

The unfamiliar yet elegant garb makes you feel shy and the fact that Eren was gaping at you did not help at all. He was absolutely entranced by your beauty.

You unconsciously lower your head, tucking a strand of hair beneath your ear, unable to bear the thought.

"God, you're not just beautiful. Y-you look breathtaking."

He says in a barely audible whisper, pulling you to him once more.

Placing his hands on your waist, Eren plants a soft, tender kiss on your chest, the low-cut dress affording it easily. In a heartbeat, you feel your cheeks grow hot.

"Heh. Guess I got you again." He grins wolfishly, still admiring your beauty and tracing circles on the back of your hand. "I-I don't deserve you... I really don't."

"If you didn't deserve me, would you be here right now?" You say jokingly, raising your eyebrow.

"I mean it." He buries his face on the hem of your dress, his voice is muffled and soothing. "I can't believe you chose to love me." He looks up at you, eyes practically welling up with tears. "God, I honestly can't believe I'm crying right now, but, yeah... I am. That's how much I love you and how much I want to marry you right now."

You giggle at the expression your boyfriend has shown before you, stroking his hair and burying your fingers into his long brunette locks. "I love you too. But... why so sudden? You already told the saleswoman that we'll be back in a few years. She'd be surprised to hear you change your mind so easily."

"Well, if that's the case, then I better tell Jean to have us first on the list of the wedding booth then. We worked our asses off for this, might as well be the first to be blessed with the luck of that stupid booth."

You giggle once more as he continues to hold you so close. You feel his breath and his heartbeat. Each exhale and pulse brings you to the realization that Eren is the one. The man you want to be with for the rest of your life. The man who will help you through all your faults and mistakes, your burdens and troubles, through all the ups and downs... he will be there.

Just as you will be for him.

Guess those stupid movies centered around weddings weren’t so bad after all

.taglist: @crapimahuman​

[skitzo-kero]

🖊🖊!

!!!! Two pens, I shall grace thee with two ocs!! Because this is probably gonna get long I'll put it under the cut!

This is going to include my favorite girlboss ocs Chrys and Khalki!

Chrys Warnings: Mention of murder, emotional manipulation (supernatural ability), mentions of child neglect. All non-descript

Khalki Warnings: Slavery, attempted drowning, drug mention. All non-descript

So starting with Chrys! She has come a long way from being an uwu cat girl chimera fullmetal alchemist oc to being part of her own story (which doesn't have a name yet, RIP).

She is called a Reborn, someone who's died/almost died, and their soul fought so drastically to be returned to life, that when a spirit comes to take their heavy traumas and pasts from their body, they take the spirit and return to life with new funky powers!

Chrys (gave up her surname a loooooong time ago), has one near-death experience when she was a child (car accident) and later as a teen she did die for a short period of time (psychosis break during school, resulting in police shootout). She returned to life and became a serial killer and blood analyst.

Her abilities make her akin to the charming/charisma based vampires. She can manipulate the emotional state of others in a situation (mainly towards herself). If she consumes blood, this ability is enhanced.

This ability formed due to the spirit attached to her, and therefore is a manifestation of the trauma she endured during her life. Mainly neglect from her father and then her foster homes, she felt like she was never good enough and just wanted people to not be mad at her. Her near-death trauma is why blood enhances her abilities, because she's already a close friend of death.

When it comes to her personality, Chrys tends to be boisterous and snarky extrovert. She likes to keep conversations light (sometimes bordering on flirtatious, but that's just how she converses, if someone is uncomfortable she will make an effort to cut back) and prefers to have others talk about themselves than to talk about her own life.

As an example!! In an rp @multi-lefaiye and I did with her and their oc Sam, Sam was hitchhiking and Chrys casually picked him up. She got talking and was trying to cheer Sam up since he was really going through it at the time. She bonded with him over the trip, mainly because she saw a lot of herself in Sam, but she did almost... uh... off him. She was heading to bury a body and made Sam do all the work </3. They're heading off now to kill Sam's parents <3.

Khalki!!! My girl!!! Okay so there's a few iterations of Khalki! There's her og DnD 5e iteration, the modern iteration (with powers), and the Arcana iteration!!

Starting with the dnd version. Khalki, otherwise known as Captain Free, had previously been a slave on a drow airship. She freed herself and found her own crew, becoming a captain in her own right and naming herself after an aspect of life she values greatly. Freedom.

Haven't worked out all the details for this version, but she's partnered to Multi's character Adeli!! They're very cute, I'm soft for this ship (this was the main ship we had going on around the time we got together). This actually goes for all iterations! They're aren't allowed to be separated <3

The Arcana iteration had a similar start though, because of pirate superstition about women on ships, they decided to throw her overboard, tied to an anchor, as they had been in a storm so bad that crew were falling overboard.

Khalki survives due to making a deal with the Death spirit card, her eyes getting a fiery pentagram in them and her tongue splitting. Her magic primarily revolves around warmth and fire!

She eventually finds a little bit of a friendship in Julian and Portia (mainly Portia) due to pirate shenanigans, this leads her to Asra's shop one day and she meets Adeli <33333 Having no current work, Khalki asks to just be a guard or bouncer of sorts, or even to just help get supplies in from the docks.

Usually when I do writeblr prompts I do a lot of Adeli and Khalki because soft fluff mixed with pining angst.

Modern Khalki!! So she's essentially a growing demon! Her family gave her up after seeing the start of her horns and tail and she actually lives out of her car. Her primary source of income is selling drugs, but she has standards on who she sells to. She happens to meet Adeli when going into a new corner store for some snacks and thought Adeli was so cute that she had to keep coming back. Eventually, Khalki becomes an employee as well and man, this iteration has so much more pining <3333

Oh!! But her powers revolve around fire and draconic-devil imagery!! It's all fire related, starting off with fire manipulation and eventually being able to create fire herself. As she becomes less human, she also gets physical enhancements!!

[captainkurosolaire]

Things I Like RP Partners to Know

I like to be called: Captain, Kuro, Zach, Degenerate, w/e. I'm typically not nerved by really anything, mostly chill. (Went in-depth and tagged below cut)

One thing you should know about me: I really just write for passion anymore, I don't care about this whole Post+ stuff, it won't play a factor in me. Tumblr has really everything that allows me to write and further myself. However, it ever goes away, even if becomes Myspace 2.0, I'll probably still maintain writing here off and on in spurts. --Now if they shut-down, I might convert over somewhere that's identical, cause Twitter couldn't handle my girth. I'm mildly autistic and suffer from a few other conflicting health aliments, writing is my obsessiveness and remedy. Used to be gaming, but I became less of a gamer, and replaced it more for writing cause It's a place where I can contain and throw all my thought's to usage. My mind overlaps with so much thing's at once, I get side-tracked, misplacement, my concentration shifts horribly, before I know it, I haven't slept for twenty-four hours or more. Lot of stuff is just me being redundant by fault. Or I become overwhelmed with a story ideas, that impulsively takes me, but majority of my best thing's are sudden. Not the one's that are ever planned. But I don't live to make excuses never care to be defined, by one thing, or person. I don't aim to attain much of anything in life but be a better me, until my end. And by analyzing your mind, you can do or achieve a lot I've discovered. So I repetitively no matter what jog down my WIP's and unleash, or my errors, I put them all on badges displays, then I go back and repeat until I show progress. That's how I have to learn. But passion is a candle, so when it burn's out I lose a lot of what I learned, it's natural after that to be discouraged, but instead, for me, that gets me going again. Cause mean's I can come at thing's with a whole new mental perspective and different flow, then compare, and again, adapt and improve. One thing you should know about RPing with my character(s): Everything is a factor and story with me. Losses, they matter. My character originally was highly killable almost every session, but advanced due to the actions of others, because of them, he found the value of his own life, and that's how I like to do my characters. Even the win's my character gets from stories, will most likely have a 'bad ending' occasionally or result into something new sprouting from it eventually, however that doesn't define at-all how permanently it effects them. But seasonally they go through their struggle. Life for real, is up and down's, these are the component's I factor in. Realistically, sure we fall. We never truly decline unless we allow it. Our character's philosophies, their mental judgement, dislikes, etc, all these thing's become ingrained they decide how much they want too fight and live, they step to improve or sometimes stumble under roadblocks, but not truly devolve. So the more people he interacts with or meets and encounters in RP, they are factors, they're meaningful to meet again, or live, their short teachings are insightful. No matter how small or large or incomplete stories went or passed-by. I created a character who was filled in by others initially. Even one-shot smuts, they're important experiences. Lot more to appreciate when your character learns on their own how to surpass their weaknesses and suffering organically. Still do RP with others but typically I do collaborations, or pre-established or short things, or Discord, one-shot in-game stuff, screenshot things that can convey RP. Want to build this Crew as their own functioning characters, not so much minor throwaways, but shippable, and highly in-depth. Essentially building an optional anime for my partner's, one-day. Long-term with me right now just isn't something I'd ever ask or expect from me. I'm too jumbled and a mess. But it's not a never, I do have two people who are among all my stuff and involved. I'd include anyone in my stories too if they wanted partaken. First language: Gibberish / English. Age range: under 13  |  14–17 | 18–22 | 23–25 | 26–29 | 30+ | 40+ | 70+ Am I okay with NSFW?: yes |

no | some nsfw I came solely off that, my reputation, was known as 'That ERP guy' on Balmung OG day's, I'm one of the degen's from that era. But character's evolve and adapt as do their people, they become more, but maintain their origins to degree. Those perspective's and things learned from NSFW are very paramount to a lot of SFW too. My favorite/most common thing to RP is: angst | fluff | smut | crack | action | plots | AUs are fine | Violence | Darker themes |  I dunno. * I'm pretty open-ended in all things. It's all fascinating for me to attempt at improving. Reason finally pulled the trigger and made a diverse Crew for Captain was give off different interactions and also more reason's to write beyond my usual trends. I'll tackle eventually every genre... now doesn't mean I'll excel in those fields more than my specialties, but I'll do it. Canon Character RP Friendly?: yes | no | depends * I stick with the sandbox but I'll stretch out all the space and limits of it. Building skyscrapers and UFO's with that sand, just happens that this Universe has magic, science, alchemy, holograms, all-around unlimited absurd possibilities, more than even D&D, which makes this game the best to RP within. When comes to interacting with anything Canon base, It'll always dwarf me though. Most likely I'll write my own legit WoL's, thinking of making an 'antagonist' one, but more 'protagonist too' (maybe hunk viera male?) I like making construed lines between characters, that's really complex, it's avidly up to a reader to decide who's in the right or wrong or if they're rooting for the villain or good-guy. I see most lore characters as Celebrities which my character would be rightfully cultured in, and they're untouchable, least for my characters. To me the source of what, who, or with you're writing is what determines a lot. But yeah RPing with anything Canon related, I switch to being a just minor gnat. And there's going to be a lot of consequences, that come if there's anything that does effect something that matters in the Universe. Just cause my pirate is causing havoc and having fun for now, doesn't mean law's don't catch-up or something else doesn't. Cause and effect always. RP blog: does contain ooc posts | doesn’t contain ooc posts | occasionally contains ooc* I would do more OOC if did asks, or inbox related things and was wanted, but outside occasional updates, I stick to my role. That's just write stories and screenshots and practice everything. I'm thankful for anyone who does enjoy anything I share or supports me, It's what brings me back faster and I do always think of you too when I want to get better, it's uplifting and inspiring, alongside boosting. If I do bring any motivation to anything, I do. Then that's the best payment I could get. I like seeing others thrive, or soar higher than me, and unleash their creativity. Tagged by:@spotofmummery (Thank ye my treasured friend!) Tagging anyone/everyone: @roguestly @scholarlybreadbun @under-the-blood-moonlight @lettersnorth @violet-warder @lukawarrioroflight @eligos-venator @corpse-dancer @silvernsteel @silvertail-ffxiv @roxinova @lavender-hemlock @fracturedfantasia @zhauric @fair-fae @avwalya @yuki-yukichan @crow-iv @cadrenebula @spellsandtales @casualcatte @seascrapes @mishivymendi @thorcat @aqueerfishtheyis @ljoturyalre @seabound-dragoon @scornedjustice @laylahcousland @layla-grey @moonstruck-ffxiv @snow-covered-moon (Apologies if missed anyone. If there's more who'd like to be tagged again on all these type of things, let me know.)

[rpbetter]

Hmm.. I don't why I even bother with my mutuals. I'm the only one who engages with them. Yet, when I send a simple cool starter meme to a mutual they don't reply to mine, but other people. This has been happening for several months, it's a small rpc, but the fandom is large. Whenever I reblog a meme I don't ever expect anyone to send me anything that's their choice, but its quite dishearting when my mutuals doesn't send any. Only one or two do sometimes five, while I'm nice enough to send it in their askbox. Sometimes I wonder if its because I don't post my fanart on my blog or I write a popular character; some rpers have a negative stigma against.. which is unfair and wrong.. Its so depressing. I don't know why I'm sad I'm in my 30s I should not be feeling this way. Or perhaps I'm being taken advantage of due to how genuine and considerate I am.. its like they sit back and do nothing while I do the work. God I hope not. I'm very chill and respect my mutuals. It just seems as though I'm being lead on and I'm afraid to express how I feel.

I'm really sorry you're feeling like this, Anon, I don't know if anything I have to say will help, but maybe it'll at least be helpful that you've gotten to express it somewhere! I'm definitely going to try, though.

Unfortunately, all of this is way too common. You're not at all alone in feeling this way, any of it! I think we've all had the experience of what amounts to being in one-sided RP, if we haven't, it's because we haven't yet. You'd think that being in a smaller area of the RPC that it would make this less likely to happen, but I think it can be worse sometimes in this situation because people in smaller circles have a tendency to become insular in a way that can be really bad.

It isn't usually intentional, you just become very comfortable with this smaller number of people and your relationships with them, everyone ends up with a sort of role within it. We establish in our minds that muns a, b, and c are our go-to writing partners, b and c are those we always send to or answer memes from, a we always interact with extra OOC, and so on. When you're muse d, your efforts go nowhere, you're not the mutual for any of it in their minds.

There probably is something making this easier, though, and you might very well be right about you being genuine and considerate being a factor. As much as that is the way to be, it can act against you as well if you're being viewed not as just a nice, considerate mun, but as someone who just exists to quietly support others. People could be viewing you as so relaxed and without demand that it doesn't matter to you much, or that even if it does, you're not a priority compared to the mutuals they might be concerned about dropping them if they don't give enough attention to them.

To that end, there is honestly not much you can do. Anything you say on the dash is likely to come across as suddenly too demanding or guilting, and coming to them individually to ask if there is something you could be doing for more interactions might not be seen as a genuinely no-pressure question. I'd recommend, if there are any changes you end up enacting in order to help combat all of this, that you post a very pleasant message saying, essentially, "I've made some updates and I'm looking to do some new threads, if anyone is interested, here is my meme tag! If you'd like me to send you a meme, comment what your meme tag is so I can."

That way, you're making them aware that you have changed some things (you can even post about those specific changes so they can all see if those are things that they felt were holding them back from interacting), directly stating you want/are seeking new interactions with them, and giving them two options to start that up quickly. Nothing guilt-trippy about it, just informative and direct, but polite still.

Now, about those possible changes, because there might be some other factors compounding this situation.

Do your current mutuals seem to be just meme based? I mean, do they primarily interact only through memes, or do they prefer to do some plotting first? It could be that they don't feel like responding to the starter meme coming from you is going to turn into a lasting thread if they require some plotting. It's possible that they started out just doing memes, but as time has gone, they've changed...and not mentioned it.

For example, I do require plotting or established interactions between mun and muse alike before I'll do a starter-style meme with someone. That's because I want it to be a longer-lasting thread, and I don't have to do plotting with these muns to make that happen. I also put that in the tags on the incredibly rare occasion I reblog one because that's the polite thing to do, but they may feel afraid that they'll be accused of favoritism or elitism if they do that. I'm not saying that's right, it's not, it's unfair and kind of mean to ignore people for their failure to do something you require that you're not telling them about, but it could be part of what is happening.

If they have open starters, do starter calls, that they're also not responding to (or have things in their rules about plotting) that could be a big part of this issue. They'd rather you react to the open starters, or contact them about writing a starter, and/or contact them for plotting.

There is also the possibility that the memes you're sending do not seem, to them, like situations that are either going to work out or that are appealing from your muse. Obviously, you thought so, or you wouldn't have sent it! It's always hard to tell what someone else thinks, however.

The memes you're sending could be too vague, or conversely, too specific for a situation they don't see with your muse/don't want with your muse. If they're very simple sentence starters, that could be hard to respond to with a muse they don't have established interactions with. If they're too specific, they could feel it's implying a relationship with your muse that theirs doesn't have.

It's a difficult balance and a lot of guessing, but try to send something in the middle of the two. Something that doesn't imply the muses know each other, but also gives something interesting to go off of easily.

Could also be the number of memes you're sending. Everyone wants to get memes, we're all upset when we post a meme and get absolutely nothing! But one person sending us many memes can feel overwhelming or even demanding. I know you're not trying to come off that way, and I cannot say that it is being perceived as such, but this is a possibility and I am trying to cover as many of them as I can in case one works out so you can enjoy yourself in RP again!

If you think this may be the case, try holding off on sending them. Give yourself a set number...something very small at first like one to each mutual a month only when it comes to starter-style memes specifically. That's going to be lame, and I'm sorry! You clearly don't have the interactions you want and it's upsetting enough to you as it is, but if running this experiment means figuring out something that allows you to have them, it'll be worth it, right?

As for the memes you do receive from others, what kind are you getting? Are they sentence/starters, or ones you can answer OOC? Variety of both? Are they the most basic, non-committal sentence on the meme, or interesting, engaging ones? This could be an important clue as to what your mutuals want/where they hold the possibility of your interaction and why. It could also be adding to their perceptions.

I feel like I should say again, as I've no desire to add to how bad you're feeling, that I mean none of this in either an assured way or a judgmental one. I'm just covering all bases of possibility, and even if any of these things are the case, you're not being a bad RP partner, you just might be the wrong one for some of your current mutuals.

If you are primarily getting OOC or non-committal sort of sentence starters, they could be trying to send you memes to be nice, but not have an interest in writing with you. They could be trying to see more of your muse before making that commitment, too. It could be that they're seeking some more development on the muse from you, or more development of a verse they think their muse would work out best with yours in.

So, if you're getting questions that are giving you an opportunity to talk about your muse, develop them, show everyone how you write them, be sure you're taking that opportunity. Try not to reply to those with really short, obvious answers/responses. If it seems there is no way to answer without being obvious, think on ways you can give new information involved with the obvious answer.

If you are getting sentence/starter memes, make your reply as personally interesting to that mun as possible. Go through their wishlist tag if they have one and write your response based on one of them. If they haven't any plots they've expressed a desire to do, you can still get a good idea of what they find particularly appealing by both the threads they already have and the sort of things they reblog. It could just be that, in the past, what you've given in return wasn't something they felt drawn to enough.

Since you said in the second message you sent that this was a relatively recent thing, they used to interact with you, I'm really wondering if they've lost interest in your muse for another fandom favorite, or there is a similar issue going on. Because that certainly implies that something changed for them that did not change for you.

Has there been a significant change in fandom? An old favorite character returned, there is a new one the whole fandom is about, or yours did something in canon that the fandom didn't like? It's always the risk of playing a canon...even one that is canonically dead can end up having something in their story added to that drastically changes the fandom's opinion, so it's a possibility.

In any event, on the other points, big fandom favorite-of-the-moment canons always, I mean that, knock everyone else out. jusAnd it doesn't even have to be in your fandom, either! It can be in a popular enough fandom that your mutuals accept crossovers from, and can feel really shocking when you have a situation like...they all left that major fandom due to burnout with it or drama, but were still attached to it enough to accept crossovers, and suddenly, new media, especially with an old favorite, appears - you are categorically ignored for another fandom's MC lol Neat feeling!

So, it could have nothing at all to do with you. You're just not the hyperfixation right now.

There are some changes that could have happen that might be more involved with you. I don't want to say "have to do with you," because that implies fault and it's not a fault situation when people change and want different things than what they one enjoyed with you. It's possible that some of your mutuals have grown into lengthier writing, different plot genres (they were about hurt/comfort, now they're about fluff), are more/less into shipping than they were, things like that.

I feel I should clarify again that this isn't judgment! It's unfortunately stigmatized to call this "growing into/progressing/etc." when that's just the best way to put it. It implies that you lack growth, you're stuck somewhere, you need to progress. That's not what I'm implying, or that there's anything wrong with continuing to enjoy a hobby the same way you always have...just as there's nothing wrong with expanding on it.

This could be part of the situation. Especially if your mutuals are at one of those awful age ranges where people experience rapid changes in how they enjoy things. What is a great time when you're RPing in your late teens is really different from what you enjoy in your early twenties is really different from what you enjoy in your mid to late twenties is different from what you enjoy in your early thirties is...you get the point. (Though, I will say, for all y'all ageist folks out there: you need to both stop shitting on teens/early twenties people for writing at a lower level than you in your late twenties and stop acting like anyone over thirty is a pedo, unapproachable, and into their forties and beyond are just incomprehensible as writers. Writing is a skill, you improve by doing it, and there is no magical age at which one turns into a pedo and has to give up their interests.) It's really possible that many of them have moved into different aspects of RP than you have.

If that seems to be the case, you have a couple of options. Pay attention to what they are writing, see if that's something you would enjoy working on doing as well. If so, start working on it by increasing your writing skills with any threads you do have or memes you do get, practice is the best way. If you have literally nothing to practice with, you'll have to practice on your own by taking a meme line you would have loved to get, using it as a writing prompt, and writing out what comes to you, just as you would in a meme someone sent you.

Okay, so what if you aren't interested in doing what they are? That's fine! Instead, you may want to look into attracting new mutuals that are more into what you are.

Honestly? If you feel like you are questioning why you even bother with these people already...that's my honest opinion of what you should consider doing regardless. Find new mutuals.

We all know there's a bit of a promo issue, they don't bring in new partners the way they once did, but it's still a good idea to have one floating around. Promo yourself on any relevant lists of active RPers out there you can find. If it's something you'll be alright with, be sure you're crossover and OC friendly to attract the maximum amount of muns and advertise in the maximum number of lists (though, if you say you have a verse in a fandom, do actually make that verse). Verses are a great way to give your potential mutuals the possibility to interact with your muse, consider adding ones from any major fandoms you enjoy and the usual favorites like a "modern" verse.

Other things you can do/should check if you're going to try attracting new mutuals would be having some writing on your blog for them to see and being certain your rules, muse bio, etc. are all up to date and finished out.

With the writing, I realize the situation you have going on is not great for showing potential mutuals your writing! Whatever current things you have, be as active with them as possible, and consider doing some headcanons or one shots. That way there is something that shows you're active, a bit about what interacting with you and your muse is like, and what you're capable of writing.

And with the other things, they're all really important information for mutuals to have, especially new ones who haven't been there with you this whole time. Your old mutuals may know, for example, what putting in your rules "just don't be a dick" means to you, specifically, but new mutuals do not. So, give your rules a once-over to be sure they're clear on what you do/do not want, how you approach RP, etc. Make sure all the common things are covered, but things unique to yourself as well.

If you haven't finished your muse bio, or you feel there are new things for you to add to it now, it's the best time to do so! Since you have a canon, I have to say it - don't just link to a wiki. Take this time you've been unfortunately gifted by inactivity to write up your own take on this muse - your portrayal is different than anyone else's, show your new mutuals how.

If you haven't a page for verses yet, or that page/post is really brief and has things like, "this is a modern verse, it takes place in our world" now is also the time to either make it or improve this. Really tell them what is different about your muse in each verse, what's interesting about this verse, where they fit into the canon of whatever fandom. Treat these verses as foundations for what you'll build with your mutuals, not hard stories that have to be followed, and be sure you're clear about that on the page/post! It'll help more people engage with your muse when they don't feel like you have an immutable story already without them.

Consider adding a navigation page/post if you do not already have one. A pinned post can work for this! That way you can link by your tags as well, so new people checking out your blog can quickly see your memes, headcanons, aesthetic posts, everything. And if you haven't been tagging those things? Start doing it for this purpose! Give people a way to quickly and passively check out as much as possible on your muse before they choose to interact, it'll help them make that choice.

As a last thing...I have to ask, have you asked any of your present mutuals why you're not interacting anymore?

I understand if you haven't, especially if you hadn't developed a good rapport with them yet. They could take that as guilting or pressuring and get annoyed with you, so I get the anxiety and reluctance. People also have an unintentionally horrible way of lying, too. Their intentions are good, they just don't want to make anyone feel bad or start an argument, but the outcome isn't nice. Yeah, people do totally ask these things expressly to be lied to and validated, or even to start an argument, but we shouldn't be treating everyone like that's what they're doing. We should assume that when people ask for help understanding a problem that they want the help. Community problem we all need to work on!

But anyway, if you feel like any of them are going to be honest and polite with you, and you haven't done so already, try asking them what is going on. No one knows better than they do why they're not engaging with you anymore, after all. Even if this isn't a situation that is going to improve with these mutuals, it's good to know for the future.

To avoid sounding like you're pressuring/shaming/guilting them, choose your words and phrasing carefully. Instead of, "I noticed you don't respond to the memes I send you, but do respond to memes from other mutuals," try, "I noticed we don't interact much anymore, it's fine if you're just in a different place now, but if there is something I can be doing differently, it would help me a lot to know, if you're alright with discussing that with me."

I'm not trying to imply you don't know how to converse with people, Anon lol I just know that it can be a difficult situation, it can lead to us unintentionally saying something that come off wrong to the other party. I'd really love for you to get an answer, even if it isn't one you like, so you'd at least know what went on and could move on from it.

Because this, reasonably, is pretty upsetting.

You are never too old to feel disappointed, hurt, or confused, Anon! It's okay to be depressed at any age when you've invested your time and energy in a hobby only to have it passed over for nebulous reasons. Hobbies are supposed to be fun, but that's the thing...hobbies aren't your job, the time and energy you invest in them is just for you. It's a passionate pursuit, if you want it to be. So having this kind of situation is hurtful, and you don't even know why it's happening.

Tumblr has this extremely gross problem with throwing around shit to shame muns over twenty-five for having a hobby still, don't internalize it! I'm not remotely sorry that I have interests outside of my work, cleaning my house, paying my bills, or having offspring (which, I do not, but that's the expectation, at midnight on your twenty-sixth birthday, if you don't drop dead, you have three children and a spouse and they're your sole interests, this is the only way to be an adult)...and I'm not remotely sorry for being as passionate about those interests as I was ten and twenty years ago, either. Including the emotions that come with it. I'm sure that if being a PTA parent was my primary hobby and someone snubbed me repeatedly in it without telling me why, I'd be upset about that, too. It's okay to have a hobby, it's okay to have feelings, including negative ones like being depressed. No matter what the RPC has to say about it.

I just hope that something in here helps! It might take a little bit to find new mutuals, talk to your current mutuals, try out new things with your writing, whatever it is you end up trying, but try to stay patient and looking forward to better things to come. I believe this can work out, and you deserve for it to!

Oh, on a side note? If it is your muse being one the fandom has stigmatized? Same, and fuck them. Is that hostile? Yes, and I'm not sorry lol Don't feel like you need to change muses because of that. You need to find the right mutuals, not cater to negative, irrational, and almost certainly purity culture-based attitudes of the wrong ones. When you take up a muse your fandom, or even corner of your fandom's RPC, has taken issue with, your only responsibility is to accept that you likely will have fewer interactions as a part of that choice. Fewer does not mean none, nor does it mean the interactions you don't want/are not fulfilling or otherwise enjoyable for you. Again, you just need to find the right group of muns!

There are muns out there who will appreciate your muse, and exactly as you are writing them too. There are muns who will appreciate your writing style, activity level, and preferred genres. If it takes you a bit to find them, just look at it as an exercise to spend more time developing your muse and writing for when you find them. It'll all be worth it if you hang in there.