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helly-watermelonsmellinfellon · 1 year ago

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"The first time I heard about Taylor Swift, I was in a Los Angeles County jail, waiting to be sent to prison for murder. Sheriffs would hand out precious copies of the Los Angeles Times, and they would be passed from one reader to the next. Back then, I swore that Prince was the best songwriter of my lifetime, and I thought Swift’s rise to teen-age stardom was an injustice. I’d look up from her wide-eyed face in the Calendar section to see gang fights and race riots. The jail was full of young men of color who wrote and performed their own raps, often about chasing money and fame, while Swift was out there, actually getting rich and famous. How fearless could any little blond fluff like that really be?

In 2009, I was sentenced to life in prison. Early one morning, I boarded a bus in shackles and a disposable jumpsuit, and rode to Calipatria State Prison, a cement fortress on the southern fringes of California. Triple-digit temperatures, cracked orange soil, and pungent whiffs of the nearby Salton Sea made me feel as though I’d been exiled to Mars. After six years in the chaos of the county jail, however, I could finally own small luxuries, like a television. The thick walls of Calipat, as we called the place, stifled our radio reception, but an institutional antenna delivered shows like “Access Hollywood,” “Entertainment Tonight,” and “TMZ.” I was irritated by the celebrity gossip, but it was a connection to the outside world, and it introduced me to snippets of Swift’s performances for the first time. Here and there, I’d catch her on “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” or “Fallon,” and was surprised by how intently she discussed her songwriting. I didn’t tell anyone that I thought she was talented.

In 2013, when my security level was lowered owing to good behavior, I requested a transfer to Solano state prison, the facility with a Level 3 yard which was closest to my family in the Bay Area. I got the transfer, but my property—a TV, CD player, soap, toothpaste, lotion, food—was lost in transit. I shared a cell with someone in the same situation, so, for months, we relied on the kindness of our neighbors to get by. Our only source of music was a borrowed pocket radio, hooked up to earbuds that cost three dollars at the commissary. At night, we’d crank up the volume and lay the earbuds on the desk in our cell. Those tiny speakers radiated crickety renditions of Top Forty hits.

During that time, I heard tracks from “Red,” Swift’s fourth studio album, virtually every hour. I was starting to enjoy them. Laying on the top bunk, I would listen to my cellmate’s snores and wait for “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” to come around again. When it did, I would think about the woman I had lived with for seven years, before prison. I remembered bittersweet times when my sweetheart had visited me in county jail. We’d look at each other through security glass that was reinforced by wire. It didn’t seem fair to expect her to wait for me, and I told her that she deserved a partner who could be with her. But we didn’t use the word “never,” and deep down I always hoped that we’d get back together. When I heard “Everything Has Changed,” I had to fight back tears of exaltation and grief. Swift sings, “All I knew this morning when I woke / Is I know something now / Know something now I didn’t before.” I thought back to our first date, and how we had talked and laughed late into the night. We had to force ourselves to get a few hours of sleep before sunrise.

After several months, my belongings, including my CD player, finally caught up with me. I was getting ready to buy “Red” from a catalogue of approved CDs when I learned that the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation, or C.D.C.R., had placed me on another transfer list. I didn’t want the album to get stuck at the prison after I had been transferred, so I resorted to a country station that regularly featured Swift. Sometimes, hearing Southern drawls and honky-tonk medleys, I’d laugh out loud at myself. But that was the station that played the widest variety of her music, from “Tim McGraw” to “I Knew You Were Trouble.” There was, in her voice, something intuitively pleasant and genuine and good, something that implies happiness or at least the possibility of happiness. When I listened to her music, I felt that I was still part of the world I had left behind.

Hitting a new yard—in this case, the prison known as the California Men’s Colony (C.M.C.)—means finding new friends and allies. Each table and workout area was claimed by a different gang or ethnic group. I’m Asian and Hispanic, and I chose to join the Asians in a cement workout area. When they asked me what kind of music I liked, I confessed that I was anxiously waiting for a Taylor Swift album. Everyone laughed. “Oh, my God, we’ve got a Swiftie on the yard!” Lam, a muscular guy, told me. “You in touch with your sensitive side? Are you gay?” He especially loved to heckle me in front of his buddy Hung, who spoke little and laughed almost silently.

I was waiting for “Red” to arrive when I saw Swift perform “All Too Well” at the 2014 Grammys. That became the song that I played first when I peeled the plastic wrap off the disc, and the song I’d stop at and repeat whenever I spun the album. (Her ten-minute version is even better.) As Swift sang about love’s magical moments, how they are found and lost again, I thought about a time before my incarceration, when I briefly broke up with the woman I loved. She came to my house to return one of my T-shirts. When she hung it on the doorknob and walked away, I was on the other side. I sensed that someone was there, but, by the time I opened the door, she was gone.

When “Red” arrived, I finally found out why Lam had been clowning me in front of Hung. “Red” was the only Swift CD that Hung didn’t own—because he considered it a misguided pop departure from the country greatness of “Fearless” and “Speak Now.” Eventually, Lam outed himself as a Swiftie, too. For six months, the three of us would work out and debate which album was best. Then Hung transferred out of the prison, taking his CDs with him.

Around the time Swift dropped “1989,” I acquired an old-school boom box. Technically, exchanging property and altering devices is against C.D.C.R. rules, but every prison has guys who fill their cells with radios, TVs, and speakers to repair and resell. I looked out for one guy, G.L., when he first hit the yard, and he became one of the best electronic fix-it guys I’ve ever met. He loved reconfiguring different speakers to get the best sound. He rewired the boom box for auxiliary cables and gave it to me. At C.M.C., I had a cell to myself, so I’d turn up the music enough to drown out obnoxious sounds outside my cell. Of course, some people always think that Swift is the obnoxious sound. “What’s up with the damn Taylor Swift?” a neighbor yells out. Another voice chimes in with requests: “Play ‘Style.’ That song’s tight right there.” By the time the song ends, someone new will admit, “That girl’s got jams.”

When you transfer between prisons, you can’t take any undocumented property with you. At the end of 2015, I gave that boom box back to G.L. and left C.M.C. for Folsom prison. After a year, I landed at San Quentin. I started working at the San Quentin News, the in-house newspaper, for a quarter an hour. Around that time, C.D.C.R. started allowing a vender to sell us MP3 players for a hundred dollars. They charged $1.75 per song and ten dollars for a memory card. Eventually, I asked my family to order one and would call my cousin Roxan with requests. “What’s up with all the damn Taylor Swift?” she’d say during phone calls. By the time Swift released her album “Lover,” in 2019, I had almost every song she’d ever released. And, when the MP3 players were restricted because crafty folks were using the memory cards in illegal cell phones, mine was grandfathered in.

One of my homies at San Quentin had a pristine radio that played CDs and cassette tapes. When he earned parole, everybody hounded him for it. He knew how much I’d appreciate such a luxury, but I didn’t join the herd of pesterers making offers, and I think he appreciated that. He gave it to me as a parting gift. I was even able to have it officially documented on my property card. The MP3 player clipped neatly into the cassette door, so now I could see my playlists while I listened. My neighbor, Rasta, was the weed man for the building, so I played Swift to drown out the guys who were lighting up outside. Rasta made fun of me, but the crowd always liked her “Bad Blood” remix, featuring Kendrick Lamar. “That’s the shit right there,” they’d say. “Who would’ve thought?”

Seven months after “Lover” came out, C.D.C.R. shut down all programming because of the covid pandemic—no indoor group interactions, no volunteers from outside the prison, no visitors. C.D.C.R. brought the coronavirus into San Quentin when it moved some sick guys from another prison in. By the end of June, 2020, hundreds of us were testing positive and getting sick, including me. I lugged all my property to an isolation cell in a quarantine unit, where I shivered and sweated through a brain fog for two weeks. My only human contact came from nurses in full-body P.P.E., who checked my vitals, and skeleton crews of officers—the ones who weren’t sick themselves—who brought us intermittent meals. I followed San Quentin’s death tallies on the local news. Would I die alone in this cell, suddenly and violently breathless? I made a playlist of Swift’s most uplifting songs, listening for the happiness in her voice.

Alone in a prison cell, it’s virtually impossible to avoid oneself. As my body and mind began to recover, I started to question everything. What really matters? Who am I? What if I die tomorrow? I hadn’t been in touch with my sweetheart in more than two years, because she had told me that she was trying a relationship with someone who cared about her. Now, though, I wrote her a letter to see if she was O.K.

A week after I mailed my letter, I received one from her. Prison mail is slow enough that I knew it wasn’t a response—we had decided to write to each other at the same time. “The lockdown has afforded me plenty of time to reflect on all sorts of things,” her letter said. “I’ve been carrying you with me everywhere.” Reading it brought to mind Swift’s lyrics in “Daylight”: “I don’t wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you.” She was single again, and we started talking every week. In lockdown, between paltry dinner trays, I did pushups, lunges, squats, and planks in the twenty-two-inch-wide floor space in my cell. The twentieth year of my incarceration was approaching.

In 2020, the California legislature passed a law that made anyone who served twenty continuous years, and who was at least fifty years of age, eligible for parole. I’m fifty-three, and I’ll get my first chance at release in 2024. I couldn’t help but think of “Daylight” again. “I’ve been sleeping so long in a twenty-year dark night,” Swift sings. “And now I see daylight.”

These days, I call my sweetheart as often as I can. Officers can shut down the phones with the flick of a switch, and technical glitches often take the system offline, so I treat each call as if it were my last. It often feels like she’s waiting to hear from me. She tells me that it’s complicated and confusing for her, speaking to the ghost who disappeared twenty years ago. But, leaning against a wall, next to all the other guys talking with loved ones on the phone, I don’t feel like a ghost. I feel alive. Just recently, she told me, “Talking like this over the phone so much, I think we’ve gotten to know each other way better than before.” We talk about how much we have changed. “You might not even find me attractive anymore,” she tells me. “I’m not the same person I was back then.”

One morning in October, 2022, I had breakfast in the chow hall and made it back to my cell in time for “Good Morning America.” My TV doesn’t have any speakers, so I plugged it into my boom box. Suddenly, I heard a familiar voice singing an unfamiliar chorus: “It’s me, hi / I’m the problem, it’s me.” The anchors on the broadcast were giddy to announce Swift’s new album “Midnights,” and play clips from the music video of “Anti-Hero.” Swift appeared as a larger-than-life figure, arguing with different versions of herself. I laughed to myself. Here we go again.

Our MP3 distributor was always slow to release new music, so I spent a couple of weeks hearing about the album on the news, waiting for my chance to listen. Then, out on the prison grounds, I bumped into a volunteer whom I’d known and worked with for years. We were walking through the yard together when they started looking around to make sure no one was watching. After confirming that the coast was clear, they slipped me a brand-new copy of “Midnights” and wished me a happy birthday. The gesture nearly brought me to tears. That evening, after dinner, I peeled off the plastic and brushed a bit of dust out of the boom box’s CD player. “Lavender Haze” played as I read the liner notes. “What keeps you up at night?” Swift writes.

For the past two decades, sleep has not come easily to me. Often, when I get into bed, I think about the day I was arrested at the scene of my crime. Some neighbors called 911 and reported gunshots. I can still see the grieving family members of the man I killed, staring at me in the courtroom at my trial. I’m guilty of more than murder. I abandoned my parents and my sweetheart, too. There’s no way to fix this stuff.

Taylor Swift is currently the same age, thirty-three, that I was when I was arrested. I wonder whether her music would have resonated with me when I was her age. I wonder whether I would have reacted to the words “I’m the problem, it’s me.” Hers must be champagne problems compared with mine, but I still see myself in them. “I’ll stare directly at the sun, but never in the mirror,” Swift sings, and I think of the three-by-five-inch plastic mirrors that are available inside. For years out there, I viewed myself as the antihero in my own warped self-narrative. Do I want to see myself clearly?

In “Karma,” Swift sings, “Ask me what I learned from all those years / Ask me what I earned from all those tears.” A few months from now, California’s Board of Parole Hearings will ask me questions like that. What have I learned? What do I have to show for my twenty years of incarceration? In the months ahead, when these questions keep me up at night, I will listen to “Midnights.” The woman I love says she’s ready to meet me on the other side of the prison wall, on the day that I walk into the daylight. Recently, she asked me, “If you could go anywhere, do anything, that first day out, what would you want us to go do?” That question keeps me up at night, too."

~.O.~

This was an amazing piece. Taylor's music touches the hearts of many people across the various divides that humanity has created to separate us all. I genuinely believe this man has served his sentence and has truly changed for the better, and I hope that he and his lover get a happy ending to their Love Story.

#Taylor Swift #Midnights #red taylor’s version #speak now taylor’s version

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adtronics · 7 months ago

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Full Color Led Signs: Illuminating Your Message

In the realm of advertising and communication, captivating attention is paramount. Amidst the crowded landscape of billboards, banners, and digital displays, full-color LED signs have emerged as a dynamic and compelling medium to convey messages with unparalleled vibrancy and clarity. These innovative signs utilize Light Emitting Diode (LED) technology to produce stunning visuals that grab attention and leave a lasting impression.

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In conclusion, full-color LED signs represent a cutting-edge evolution in visual communication. With their unparalleled brightness, versatility, and longevity, these dynamic displays offer a compelling solution for businesses, municipalities, and organizations seeking to captivate audiences and convey messages with maximum impact. Whether it's illuminating city streets, showcasing products, or enhancing the ambiance of events, full-color LED signs shine bright as beacons of innovation in the world of signage.

#custom led business signs #led message display

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thebandcampdiaries · 2 years ago

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youtube

Andrew Van Etten is back with a brand new studio work: "Feel Like Home"

An emotional and uplifting track with a country-pop twist and a timeless vocal hook.

April 2023 - Andrew Van Etten is an artist and music producer based in Nashville, Tennessee. He has a strong focus on creating music that is both catchy and innovative. The sound feels approachable and easy to relate to, but the artist never settles into a comfort zone. On the contrary, Andrew is really all about keeping things interesting and trying new things to spice up his songwriting. The artist's most recent release, "Feel Like Home," is actually a really great example of this. The song was actually written by Kyle Sturrock, who collaborated with Andrew on this amazingly charming and highly personable track. "Feel Like Home" was mixed and co-produced by Stephen Van Etten and recorded at CmdShft Studios in Nashville. A few years back, Andrew actually posted an acoustic live rendition of the song to his Youtube channel. Later on, he released a full-band version, which features a more immersive production. While the acoustic version is powerful for its stark and back-to-basics impact, the full studio version is impressive due to the multiple layers that make the sound so impactful. The song begins with a lush pad sound, which adds so much ambiance and texture right off the bat. The sparse keyboard melody connects with the vocals right away, at times reminding of the sound of highly respected artists such as HARDY or The Fray, among others. The drum rhythm is initially more subdued and minimalistic, but eventually, it becomes a lot more prominent, helping the song take off. One of the track's true highlights is actually the passionate sound of Andrew's vocals. The lyrics are very powerful and relatable, matching the song's hopeful and nostalgic feel. About halfway through, the acoustic guitars come in, bringing an extra drive to the song with energetic strum patterns. There is also room for some amazing electric guitar colors in the background and an awesome solo, which act as a bridge of sorts. The song has a really awesome build-up, as it starts off from a very soft-spoken, minimalistic arrangement and eventually leads into a beautiful opening, which enables the song to reach a powerful and galvanizing melodic climax. Andrew is a true master at controlling the dynamic of the performance, creating a "ladder" effect, meaning that the song continues to move up until it reaches an amazing high point at the end. The tension and release effect continually builds up, offering so much emotion at each step of the way! While "Feel Like Home" has rooted in country and pop, it also embodies the melodies of indie-folk and even dream pop. For this reason, it might be a great fit for fans of artists such as Francis Moon and Lewis Capaldi, among others!

"Feel Like Home" feels like a very good way for people to get acquainted with Andrew's artistic vision. This new studio work is indeed highly recommended to fans of artists such as Amos Lee, Mitchell Tenpenny, Russell Dickerson, and Brett Young, only to mention a few. In the same way, these artists managed to leave their mark on the music scene, Andrew is making strides to further develop his vision and provide a sound that feels utterly unique and one-of-a-kind. "Feel Like Home" is nuanced and well-executed in terms of production. It has a balanced, in-depth sound that combines the timelessness of country and the melodies of pop. Ultimately, "Feel Like Home" will certainly leave a lasting impression on the audience due to its intricate sonic tapestries, as well as its captivating and ethereal tone.

Find out more about Andrew Van Etten, and do not miss out on "Feel Like Home." This release is currently available on some of the best digital streaming services, including Spotify.

Spotify: https://spotify.link/RSoAG1Bbdzb

Youtube: https://youtube.com/@andrewvanettenmusic

Instagram: https://instagram.com/andrewvanetten?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Support Andrew’s musical endeavors by joining him on Patreon and becoming a patron via the following link:

https://www.patreon.com/andrewvanetten

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holts-knees · 2 years ago

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So, last week @swiss-army-fangirl came to stay with me in LA for a while, and if you know anything about me you know i’m the kind of person that needs to document things that move me. These two paintings are of our first and third nights, two both seemingly impossible events along the California shoreline (the most magical place in this country if you ask me honestly) Sappy lil stories and context below the cut < 3

Our first night we made a mad dash down to Santa Monica which was SOMEHOW almost completely empty, and we laid out on a blanket and watched as the clouds that had been hanging over the sky all day cleared JUST in time for sunset, I got to watch Tori like, atomize, as i pointed out all the colors and how the marine layer slowly consumes the mountains and the pier comes to life with all it’s lights. After a while of talking it was dark and Tori pointed up and said “is that a star?” and I laughed at her, because of Course its not this is LOS ANGELES, but then...the more we looked, it WAS and there were...MORE, It was like she brought them down with her.... I remember being sat there thinking “this is a sign....this trip is going to be So Much.....” which was interrupted by Tori going “oh my god....the big dipper looks so different from here-” and me just needing to.....Lay Down LOL. We talked for a bit longer, sitting there on the beach WELL past sunset and then we both fell dead silent and looked at each other before going “did you see that-” and we both HAD and it was....a shooting star--- HERE- ON A RANDOM NIGHT IN LA

and i haven’t stopped thinking about it since---- The second landscape is a direct rendition of a picture I took while we were in La Jolla. La Jolla is one of the few places on this earth that makes me feel completely at peace and happy, I always find myself making my where there when my soul needs it. and funnily enough, I found as i was getting to know Tori that she was familiar with it. In an abstract but still equally meaningful way, because she had heard it described in the Wilbur Soot song of the same name, which means quite a lot to her. From the moment I learned this fact the jokes started about taking her there some day. Jokes that we both knew were just that, because what would be the odds of two online friends from AK and CA, actually meeting up? Last Christmas when I was down there I sat on the rocks and listened to the song as a way to “bring her there” in spirit. And I remember getting weepy at the idea of how wonderful it would be to share this place with her, my heart ached for it, but i accepted it was never gonna happen. But then....this LA trip fell into our laps and I cannot DESCRIBE the speed at which I started to throw this day trip into motion, I KNEW I had to, I knew it was FATE. I arranged train tickets, I found a place to drink cocktails over the water, I mapped out all the things I wanted to do to make sure we’d have time for them all..... Truly went ALL IN- but it was SO worth it...because with all that planning....the day went PERFECT.... and we ended it right down at the water, sitting side by side on the beach steps, listening to that Damn Song, and coming full circle..... I pulled out my phone and took a picture of the surf right as Wilbur sang Tori’s favorite line and then when we got home I painted it, so that I could give it to her as a Physical Thing (well....digital-) that she can look back on and remember the experience by. I made sure to be meticulous about every single detail so it would be....truly EXACTLY as it happened and as we remembered it. And i’d be lying if I didnt admit i’ve gone back a few times even myself to look at it and just, Think [tm]. Think about how fortunate I have been to be able to open up my heart and show some of my most treasured places to one of my newest most treasured friends. And in turn with that, weave our friendship into little pockets and corners of those places, which only makes me love them more.... ALSO we saw a whale going down the coast and I am, fully convinced, just like the stars that Tori brought it down with her and I cannot be told otherwise. < 3

#landscape #procreate #digital art #digital painting #la jolla #los angeles #sunset #wilbur soot #RELUCTANTLY LOL #friendship

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hollownostalgia · 2 years ago

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{ MOON JUNSU } | he/him, 25 years old, manhwa artist for THE MOTH publishing company and the webtoon DREAM PACT underneath the alias of NIGHTINGALE. find him drawing on floor 28, room #2802. penned by axel, 21+, he/they.

༻⸻ { PROFILE }　　 | 　　 { PLOTS } ⸻༺

hey everyone, im looking forward to being able to meet and plot real soon, but for now, here's a quick rendition of junsu. if there's any plots underneath the link that you feel like fit, feel free to message me. i'll try to come and say hello otherwise if you leave the heart colored!

resident sleepy boy— hardly rests due to frequent nightmares and so he always looks like it, too, and probably is always holding a coffee in hand. his fingers, too, are probably always stained with some kind of ink.

grew up as an only child, he still keeps in contact with his parents even after he moved out for college. his mom's lullabies he learned when he was younger are one of the few things that can actually get him to sleep.

went to college for an art degree after spending years drawing his dreams and nightmares after their tormenting frequency, and during school, started posting regular updates for a webtoon named DREAM PACT, underneath the alias of NIGHTINGALE. it follows a character named seonyul and his cat, coffee, trapped within a universe where he isn't sure if he's dreaming or awake. full of elements of fantasy and horror that's inspired by own dreams, it's something he's continued to update since its start in 2020.

he works for a manhwa magazine underneath his real name, and still keeps both of them separate. everything he posts underneath nightingale is more personal, a therapeutic way to express his dreams, just like all of his overflowing notebooks have been over the years that he still keeps jammed into a bookcase.

usually operates underneath odd hours, up during the night and barely during the day. he's more used to things this way— can often find him wandering the halls and rooftop when he needs a break to smoke or find some sort of inspiration.

he's usually quiet and keeps to himself, though he opens up slowly once he gets to know someone. usually never mentions his own manhwa and brushes it off as work for his job instead. just because he's quiet doesn't mean he isn't up for adventures— he appreciates a certain kind of chaos, and admires people who are straightforward.

he moved into his apartment quite soon after he graduated, so he's been in the building for about a year. if he ever sees any stray cats around, he has a habit of leaving food out in bowls for them, and often returns to make sure it's eaten and puts fresh out.

some quick plots, other then what i have outlined on my plots page!

muse always tends to frequent the same coffee shop, in which junsu is trying to remain caffeinated and focused, and end up sitting alongside each other in tables frequently enough they occasionally chat. it isn't until quite awhile into it when they both happen to leave at the same time and realize they live in the same apartment building.

{ tw: drinking } college friends? junsu didn't put himself out there much in college, but he did tend to frequent parties and bars just to have somewhere to be, and often, to try and inspire himself for another chapter of his manhwa. maybe they drank together or had a shared class, but they bump into each other one day to find out they live here and proceed to catch up. { end tw }

muse recognizes junsu's name on the manhwa magazine he works on and upon sharing that they may enjoy it, he makes an effort to show them some of the rough drafts he has that he's allowed to. maybe they continue to meet up to speak about the issues and the continuing chapters of the manhwas featured in it.

art friends? junsu enjoys traditional art even though most of what he does professionally is digital, but he often uses ink and watercolors on his own time when he can. maybe they meet up to draw/paint in shared silence or while sharing airpods.

#itsthq: intro #| { OOC } |

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kinktae · 5 years ago

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bitchin’ || pt. 4 (M)

↳ PART OF MY REWIND SERIES

The 80s were a time of choices. Which perm was right for you? What color neon would you wear next? None of these choices, however, were more questionable than a certain deal you made with Jeon Jungkook.

pairing: fratboy!jungkook x reader

word count: 5k

genre: 1980s au, eventual smut, e2l

warnings: multiple smut scenes, science talk, banter, jealousy, alcohol & LOTS of colorful 80s slang lmao

A/N: This fic was inspired by To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before. Thank you to @junqkook for letting me use her likeness!

OFFICIAL PLAYLIST

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10

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PART FOUR

“Ouch! Watch it, Yara! You’re stabbing me!”

Yara released her grip from the striped material of your sweater, letting it fall back down against your torso.

“I’m sorry… Is your personal tailoring experience not luxurious enough? Did you want some sparkling water? Some Crystal Light, perhaps?” The petite girl quipped, eyes narrowing.

You pressed your lips together, holding back the snarky remark that was wanting to come out from between them. You really weren’t in any position to complain. Yara had gone to the trouble of coming up with both your and Jungkook’s costumes, not to mention the fact that she was missing her scheduled viewing of Saved By The Bell just to help you get ready — truly honorable act on her part.

Shutting the pair of scissors with a sharp snip, your best friend placed them down onto the bathroom sink decisively, clearly satisfied with the holes she had carved into your oversized red and green sweater.

“What do you think? I can smear some more brown eyeshadow on the sweater if you want.”

Turning towards the mirror, you let your eyes fall over Yara’s handwork.

When Yara said you were going to be Freddie Krueger you should have expected that there would be no half-assing on her part. Jungkook was right in his assessment that the two of you were similar. Yara, although sometimes indolent, was absolutely unstoppable when she set her mind to something.

“It looks great. You went above and beyond as always.” You flashed her reflection a smile.

Reaching for the hat that sat on the counter, Yara plopped it onto your head, a satisfied grin finding her as she took in the completed look.

“So are you ready?” She inquired. “Tonight’s the big night. You nervous?”

“A little…” You confessed, shrugging. At your words, Yara adjusted your hat slightly.

“Don’t be. We went over the game plan last night, remember?”

Keeping still until your best friend’s creative vision for your hat was completed, you let out a sigh.

“Yeah.”

It should be easy; smile, hang onto Jungkook’s arm as if he was your life support, and be sure to kiss him somewhere everyone could see. Piece of cake. Totally.

Sensing a weight behind your tone, Yara offered you an encouraging smile, her hands finding yours.

“You’re gonna have a totally kick-ass time, I’m sure.” She enthused.

“As long as Jungkook doesn’t sneak off to go bang his ex and leave me alone. I don’t know anyone who is gonna be there.” You sulked, before tapping a finger against your chin in contemplation. “Then again, it wouldn’t be the worst thing ever. If he and Kiri get back together, I can finally stop pretending to date him.”

At your words, Yara’s eyebrows furrowed as if to tell you something you had said hadn’t sat well with her. Before she got the chance to express what that was, however, a loud series of knocks rang out.

“Speak of the devil and he shall appear.” You mused dryly causing Yara to laugh.

“I’ll go let him in, you stay here and try on the socks.” She ordered as she walked out, slamming the bathroom door behind her, leaving you without a choice.

You were curious however, ears tuned into the greeting that was just outside the door as Jungkook came in. Slipping on one of the socks, you brought it up to your knee, tugging at the fabric until it was no longer bunching around your ankle.

“What the hell? You cropped the shirt yourself, didn’t you? I told you I was gonna cut it for you.”

“Chill out. What’s your damage? I’m pretty sure I’m allowed to cut my own shirt.”

“Yeah, nice going, dipshit. It’s fucking crooked!”

You let out a sigh.

Your best friend and fake boyfriend could not be left unattended for even a minute without needing you to play referee, it seemed.

Pushing the bathroom door open, you poked your head out, “Children, children, let’s play nice–”

Jungkook’s head turned to you, expression softening from the irritated glare he was offering Yara just moments ago. You hardly noticed, however, too captivated by what he was wearing to pay the gentle way he looked at you any mind.

He was in a cropped white jersey, the number 10 plastered across his chest in blue just above the ragged seam of where the shirt ended, exposing inches of the lower half of his firm stomach, causing your face to flame.

Low on his hips was a pair of blue sweatpants, the ends of them tucked into his high top Chuck Taylor’s that were similar, if not the same, to the pair you had been planning on wearing.

Johnny Depp would surely be proud of Jungkook’s rendition of Glen Lantz, you decided. He even wore the same pair of silver headphones around his neck.

You cleared your throat, finally pulling your eyes away from your pretend lover’s torso.

“Wow… that’s crooked.”

“Hah! Told you.” Yara pressed, pleased at your assessment.

“Remind me why I put up with the two of you again?” Jungkook frowned, crossing his arms over his chest, unaware of the way it caused his already short shirt to ride up further.

Pulling yourself from the bathroom altogether, you walked over to the couch, plopping down onto it as you began to put on your other sock.

“Sick costume, nerd.” Jungkook praised, eyes fixated on you as you moved. “You’d make a hot serial killer.”

“Yeah, well, don’t cream your pants.” You teased, flashing him a grin.

“I can’t promise anything tonight. I’m a frisky drunk.” He winked back, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Ugh, barf me out. You’re the first on my list when I finally crack and go full homicidal.” You informed him, causing him to chuckle.

“Pleasure and pain. You really know how to get me going, Y/N.”

Yara was leaning up against the kitchen counter, quietly watching the two of you with increasing intrigue. Taking in the way the sides of your eyes creased in amusement as you continued your banter with your so-called fake boyfriend, she suppressed a smirk.

“Well…” Yara finally spoke up, a sly look on her face, “as endearing as I find your warped, semi-abusive way of flirting with one another... I have a show to catch so if you both could just hurry it up—”

“Woah, woah, woah, we’re not flirting.”

“Get real, as if I’d be flirting with him.”

Yara could only laugh at the way you both denied her accusation immediately, words overlapping with one another in unison.

“Whatever. I’ve got fake blood in the bathroom. Jungkook follow me.” She brushed the two of you off.

The costumed boy flashed you a funny look before ultimately trailing after your best friend.

Chewing on your bottom lip in silent contemplation, you let yourself ponder on your best friend’s words.

That wasn’t flirting, was it? No, that was just you and Jungkook’s usual playful banter. Sure, maybe the two of you had gotten more comfortable with one another as the days have ticked by, but it wasn’t as if it was anything more than that, right?

Lately, you had been catching yourself growing somewhat excited about seeing Jungkook, even though you saw him nearly every day. Somehow having the messy-haired boy in your life had become routine.

Having Jungkook by your side felt normal as if you wouldn’t mind it if things were always this way. And that scared you.

Shaking your head, you began to put on your shoes, tying up your laces solemnly.

The moment you held your event and Jungkook and Kiri were back together, things would go back to the way they were before. You didn’t want Jungkook to be someone you were going to miss, but it seemed like with every lopsided grin he threw at you he was cementing himself into your life more and more.

This business venture of yours was looking out to be more costly than you initially anticipated.

But as Jungkook and Yara walked out of the bathroom chatting excitedly, Yara’s hands stained and Jungkook’s jersey now smeared with fake blood, you couldn’t help but feel like you’d be willing to pay the price if it meant that this warm feeling in your chest would last just a little while longer.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jungkook asked you, hand gripping yours tighter.

You tried your best to meet his eyes. It was difficult considering how dimly lit the room was. Fitting though, considering this party was Halloween themed.

“Yes. You’ve asked me that four times now.” You told him loudly, trying to be heard over the loud sound of Michael Jackson’s Thriller playing throughout the house.

“I dunno, you’re not saying anything. It’s, like, freaking me out.” He admitted.

“I’m just… observing.”

“Observing what?”

He watched as your stare fixated itself on the beer pong tournament that was occurring across the room, excited shouts coming from several people as one of Jungkook’s brothers scored a point.

“Gorillas.” You said, finally. “In their natural habitat.”

Jungkook laughed, enjoying the way your nose scrunched up at them.

“Hey now, did we say before we got here?” He tutted disapprovingly, waging a finger at you. You followed the digit with the frown.

“Yeah, yeah, I promised no judging the common folk. This is how the intellectually lesser entertain themselves, I remember.” You sighed out, gaze flicking up to catch the amusement in Jungkook’s eyes.

The costumed boy nudged his shoulder into yours; he liked it when you joked around with him like this. It made him feel like you were comfortable around him and that you might even enjoy his company.

“Do you know what you need?” He began happily.

“I do not but my answer is already no.”

“A drink.” He continued, ignoring you.

Suddenly, you were yanked forward, Jungkook leading you by the hand towards where you assumed the drinks were.

You hadn’t been at the party for very long, but already the social interaction had exhausted you. Jungkook was far more popular than you had previously concluded; the two of you could hardly take two steps before running into someone who wanted to say hello to the frat boy attached to you.

It was daunting in a sense – the concept that every person that came up to him was going to leave the interaction with the impression that you were Jungkook’s girlfriend. Perhaps guilt wasn’t the right word, but something about the way the party’s attendees glanced down at yours and Jungkook’s intertwined hands caused your stomach to flip and neck to grow hot.

So you kept to yourself mainly, letting your socially confident boyfriend do all the talking. You didn’t mind, really; it was somewhat remarkable the way Jungkook could handle himself in a social situation. He had a way of acting like every person that stopped to chat was important.

As Jungkook and you made your way into the large fraternity house’s kitchen, you wondered if it wasn’t acting at all and if he was just that nice of a person.

“Righteous costume, JK!” A disembodied voice called out from somewhere, clearly directed at Jungkook.

You hardly had time to decipher where the voice had come from before an outrageously good looking boy draped in a white toga came forward, pulling Jungkook into a hug.

“You finally cut your hair. Looking good, Tae.” Jungkook laughed back, patting the handsome man’s back affectionately.

You watched their interaction with interest. This wasn’t acting, as far as you knew. Judging by the way Jungkook’s laugh has grown higher in pitch, something you had noticed occurred when he was genuinely happy, you knew you were witnessing genuine friendship, not just polite socializing.

“And who is this lovely lady who, might I add, looks killer? Pun totally intended.” The model man mused, eyes flashing your way.

You felt heat prickle at your cheeks.

“Taehyung, this is my girlfriend Y/N, Y/N this is Kim Taehyung. He’s head of our finance committee.” Jungkook introduced the two of you, causing your eyes to grow wide.

So this was the guy Jungkook had told you about. The guy who could help you throw your event.

Taehyung let out a scoff, “Seriously? That’s how you introduce me? The finance guy? I’m also your favorite brother, could’ve opened up with that one.”

“Taehyung’s my Big. He’s taken me under his wing or whatever.” Jungkook explained, running a hand through his dark hair.

A nervous giggle escaped you, taking Taehyung’s extended hand into yours to greet.

“Nice to finally meet you, Y/N. I’ve heard a lot about you.” The mulleted man grinned, causing one of your eyebrows to quirk up in surprise.

“You have?”

Taehyung put his hands up defensively, not noticing the way Jungkook’s expression had fallen beside him, “All good things, don’t worry. The kid talks about you nonstop—”

“Hey! So Y/N has been thinking about throwing an event here on campus, isn’t that right, babe?” Jungkook interrupted suddenly.

The arrival of the new pet name caught you off guard for a moment, before remembering that you and Jungkook were meant to be a couple after all.

“Oh yeah, Jungkook mentioned something like that to me. Tell me about it.” Taehyung said.

You stood silent for a moment, realizing that this moment was the one you had been anticipating all week long.

Relaxing your shoulders, you grinned at him.

It was now or never.

“Yeah! So the event is called STEM for FEM. I’ve got all kinds of games and pamphlets prepared. It’s basically meant to show girls that no matter what people think, there are in fact opportunities for us in the more traditionally male-dominated fields. It may be a steep road, but it’s one worth taking. And they’re not alone. There are programs out there that girls can reach out to. They offer all kinds of support; emotional, educational, financial—“

Jungkook reached for a cooler that sat by his feet, pulling out a beer. You didn’t need him for this. This was precisely what he had watched you practice into the mirror over and over; you were ready.

Popping open the can, he took a small sip, a small smile creeping on his face as he watched the way the fire in your eyes spread, your pretty lips wrapping around the words that you carried in your heart wherever you went.

“That’s radical, girl. It sounds like you’re really passionate about this stuff, huh?”

Jungkook caught Taehyung’s reply once he walked back over to you guys. He had gone off to make you a drink, figuring that cranberry juice and vodka would ease any sales pitch nerves you might have.

“Yeah, I am.” You smiled. “I’m a biology major myself.”

You tore your eyes away from the blond boy to take the red solo cup he was offering. Bringing the cup up to your nose, you sniffed it experimentally.

“Do you have a sponsor?”

You were grateful that you hadn’t taken a sip of your drink yet as had any liquid been inside your mouth you surely would have choked on it.

“Oh, uh! Not yet!” You squeaked out, causing Jungkook to fight down a chuckle.

“Because Beta Tau Sigma happens to be under our campus philanthropy quota and we’d love to support a cause like yours.” Taehyung offered, causing your heart to soar.

“Really?” You gaped.

“Sure! Just swing by anytime this week and I’m sure we can work out the details.”

This was happening. The event you had poured your absolute heart and soul into planning was actually going to happen… holy shit.

“Wow, that’s just… wow!” You replied, breathlessly. “Thank you! Thank you so much, seriously. I can’t even begin to thank you enough…”

Taehyung shook his head, clearly amused, “No need to thank me, it’s a worthy cause. Besides, think of it as a thank you.”

“A thank you? For what?”

“For dating my brother. You’re the reason he comes home every night grinning like an idiot after all.” He grinned cheesily.

A smile broke out onto your face despite yourself, but the good atmosphere didn’t last for long, as a hand finding yours caught your attention.

“Alright, alright, enough sappy shit.” Jungkook urged, cheeks tinted ever so slightly pink.

Much to the blushing boy’s chagrin, Taehyung reached over to rustle Jungkook’s long looks.

“I’m just teasing.” The blond laughed. “By the way, any chance you’ve seen Hobi?”

“No, why?”

“Dude is totally wasted. Heard someone say he was gonna jump off the roof into the pool.”

“The house doesn’t have a pool?” Jungkook blinked.

Taehyung flashed him a look as if to say ‘exactly.’

“Anyway, it was nice meeting you, Y/N. We’ll talk soon, yeah?” Taehyung asked.

“Absolutely.” You nodded.

“See ya later, man!” Taehyung called out through a crooked smile before slipping back into the crowd of people that lay just beyond the kitchen.

An excited squeal erupted from you, your hands reaching out towards Jungkook as he reciprocated your enthusiasm and embraced you in an elevated hug.

You let out a laugh, carefully holding onto the cup in your hand so as not to spill it before he set you back down.

“You did it!” He cheered.

“We did it.” You corrected.

“I didn’t do anything?” Jungkook looked at you in bewilderment.

You shook your head, “Not true. I would have never met Taehyung if it weren’t for you. Thank you, meathead.”

Jungkook looked at you warmly for a moment, knowing that despite the cruel nickname, your sincerity was genuine.

“Cheers, nerd. To a deal well done.” Jungkook said decidedly, holding out his beer.

Bumping your cup into his can, you took a swig of your drink, grimacing as the overwhelming taste of vodka made its way down your throat.

“Taehyung was awesome.” You began once you had downed a few more sips of the liquid poison. “I don’t know why I was expecting some ape-like barbarian.”

“Probably because of those gorillas you just saw over at the beer pong table.” Jungkook joked. “Yeah, Tae’s great. He’s a Legacy too, so everybody here loves him.”

You stared at him blankly, clearly not understanding the term.

Jungkook sighed, “I mean he comes from a long family of Beta Tau Sigma alumnae. His older brother Seokjin graduated last year—”

“Wait, Seokjin? You don’t mean… Kim Seokjin… our lab professor?” You furrowed your eyebrows.

“Yep.”

“No way! But he’s so…” Your eyebrows furrowed, struggling for the right word.

“Smart?” Jungkook assumed flatly.

You fought back a smile, “I was not gonna say that.”

“Mhm, I’m so sure.”

“Anyway,” You smiled, poking a finger into Jungkook’s chest, “I had no clue you liked me so much.”

“What do you mean?”

“You talk about me? I’m the reason you come home grinning every night?” You recalled Taehyung’s words.

You watched in amusement as Jungkook visibly tensed.

“W-Well, duh. You’re my fake girlfriend, I mean, it would be weird if I didn’t do any of those things...” Jungkook defended, eyes narrowing at you suddenly. “Quit gloating.”

“I’m not gloating.” You smirked.

“Yes, you are. I can see it in your face. You’re a gloater.” He said decidedly, moving to make himself a drink.

“How very dare you! I am nothing of the sort.”

“Admit it, Y/N. You relish in my misfortune.” He poured some cranberry juice into a cup, clearly moving to recreate your drink.

“The fact that I relish in your misfortune has nothing to do with this.” You waved off quickly, sending the two of you into giggles.

You somehow managed to down your cup, flashing Jungkook a grateful smile as he began to make you a new one.

You were admiring the way Jungkook’s shoulders filled out his jersey when another voice made itself known, pushing its way into the kitchen.

“Kookie, is that you?”

It was Kiri. The way Jungkook jerked around immediately, eyes as wide as saucers, told you that much.

Turning to where Jungkook’s eyes were fixated, you came to find a tall and leather-clad girl, her curled hair unmoving as she strutted forward. You couldn’t hear anything over the hum of the music playing throughout the house but you’d imagined you would hear the sound of her bright red heels rapping against the tile floor if it were quiet.

Her top was black and off the shoulder, and it dawned on you that she was dressed as Sandy from Grease.

You watched in silence as Jungkook nodded at her, a grin on his face.

“Haven’t seen you in a while. Thought you were avoiding me.” Kiri smirked, teeth on full display.

“Avoid you? Never.” Jungkook teased.

Suddenly, a weird feeling bubbled in your stomach as you watched the two interact.

Strange. Must be the vodka.

“I’ve just been busy, I guess.” He shrugged, clearly trying to play it coy.

At his words, Kiri’s eyes flickered to you, causing you to freeze.

“So I’ve heard.” She said simply. You smiled at her awkwardly.

Clearing his throat, Jungkook jumped into action, “Y/N meet Kiri. Kiri meet Y/N, my girlfriend.”

“Y/N L/N, right? I’ve been looking forward to meeting you.” Kiri admitted, eyes shaded with something you couldn’t quite decipher.

“You, uh, have?”

“Of course!” She smiled, although it didn’t quite meet her eyes. “I like to keep tabs on all the girls in Greek life… or I guess in your case, have had Greek life in them.

You blinked.

Jungkook eyes quickly moved to you. Crap. He knew Kiri well enough to detect a catty comment from her no matter how innocently she presented it. You were smart; he was sure you had caught exactly what she was implying.

For a moment, no one said anything. Jungkook gripped his cup tighter, wondering if he should say something to ease the nearly palpable tension.

However, before he got the chance, you smiled, cocking your head to the side.

“No worries, I get it. You wanted to scope out your ex’s new girlfriend, right?”

Jungkook let out a breath, realizing that you weren’t looking for any kind of conflict.

You could tell you words pleased Kiri with the way the side of her painted lips turned upward.

“So, Jungkook told you about me. How flattering.”

“Actually, he hasn’t said a word.” You smiled.

You took a step forward; it wasn’t anything aggressive or confrontational, but it was enough to capture Jungkook’s attention.

“Let’s just say I also like to keep tabs on things involving those that go inside of me.” You lowered your voice, sending Kiri a small wink.

Jungkook must know you pretty well too because he also knew that your comment wasn’t nearly as lighthearted as you made it out to be. He fought back a grin.

Kiri straighten up suddenly, “So what are you two dressed up as? A dumb jock and dirty Waldo?”

‘Well, she’s certainly not being subtle anymore.’ Jungkook thought dryly.

“Freddie Krueger and Glen Lantz. Like from Nightmare at Elm’s Street.” Jungkook answered, no longer bothering to uphold a pleasant tone.

“Is that so? I don’t watch horror movies.” Kiri shrugged.

“I know you don’t.” He reminded her.

“So did you come alone? Or is there a Danny Zuko somewhere that you’re matching with?” You asked casually, not liking the way your insides churned every time Jungkook and Kiri spoke to one another.

“He’s over there by the booth. He’s in charge of the music.” She replied, polished finger directing you where to look.

Sure enough, across the room on an elevated platform was a DJ booth, the man who was operating the device sporting a leather jacket and greased hair.

A gasp fell through your lips as you took him in, recognizing him immediately.

“That’s—” You cut yourself off immediately, turning away from him. “...so cool! Him being a DJ and whatnot.”

Kiri nodded cautiously, clearly catching on to the way you had changed your tune suddenly.

“You know what, I think Jungkook and I are gonna head over to the dance floor. But it was really great meeting you, Kiri.” You told her, reaching for Jungkook’s hand.

Your fake boyfriend sensed your urgency and took your hand comfortably.

“Nice seeing you.” Jungkook called out to her breezily as the two of you began to walk away, not bothering to give Kiri another glance.

Your heart was pounding but you tried your best to look nonchalant, knowing Kiri was probably watching the two of you leave.

As you reached the dance floor, you allowed yourself a sparing glance around to make sure that Kiri was out of ear’s reach before you wrapped your arms around Jungkook’s neck and began to sway your hips.

Bringing your mouth to his ear, you spoke, “Kiri is dating Eunwoo.”

Jungkook sent you a look, “Yeah. I know.”

You shook your head as Jungkook’s hands found your waist, keeping up with your pace.

“You don’t understand. Eunwoo is Yara’s ex.”

“Wait– Really?”

You nodded.

“Great. So he’s banged two of my girlfriends then. I swear to god, Y/N, if he tries to get into your pants next I’m gonna kick his ass into the next decade.” Jungkook grunted. You laughed.

“I just don’t understand. I swear he was in love with Yara just last week. He used to slip love notes under our door for her, you know. I even didn’t know he was in a frat?” You frowned.

“He’s a new member. He was just initiated a little while back. Fucking prick.”

That made sense. From what you had gathered tonight, everyone within Jungkook’s fraternity seemed quite friendly with one another— it didn’t make sense that an active member would betray Jungkook like that.

“You handled that very well, by the way.” Your pretend lover spoke suddenly.

“What? Kiri? Whatever, I’ve dealt with worse girls in high school.” You shrugged easily, hand finding itself running in Jungkook’s hair.

He had mentioned once that he needed a haircut but it seems as if you had successfully managed to talk him out of it. You like his hair like this.

“She was trying to use an intimidation technique that Gamma Alpha Tau uses on possible pledges.” He explained. “I promise you she’s not always that…”

“Snarky? Judgmental? Standoffish?” You offered, quirking up a brow.

Jungkook rolled his eyes, “I just mean she’s usually better behaved than that.”

“Right. Well, either way, this is a good sign.”

“What is?”

“Her hating me. Just means she’s jealous and then we’re one step closer to closing your half of the deal.” You enthused.

“Speaking of the deal, I believe you owe me a kiss, Freddie.”

Jungkook’s words took you by surprise and as much as you wanted to wipe that slick grin off his face, you knew he was right.

Humming, you let go of his hair, moving closer so that his nose was brushed up against yours.

“Your move, meathead.” You urged, letting your bottom lip brush against his teasingly.

Pressed up against him like this, you could feel a low rumble erupt in his chest.

“You teasing me?” He mused lazily.

“Didn’t you say you liked your pleasure with some pain?”

If Jungkook had a reply, you didn’t catch it in time as his mouth found yours, distracting you from any trivial thoughts weighing you down.

Something was intoxicating about the way Jungkook kissed you; he wasn’t rushed or in any hurry, but the way his mouth moved against yours made your chest pound as you brought your fingers up to pull at his hair.

Maybe it was the alcohol, perhaps it was the sound of Rick James in the air, but when his hand found your jaw and his tongue ran itself along your bottom lip you happily obligated, whimpering as his tongue moved against yours with the same fervor as the kiss you shared on your bed.

Jungkook was trying his hardest to hold back, he really was, but with the way your fingers pulled against his scalp, he felt himself start to grow greedily, grinding his hips against yours.

A whimper left your mouth and before you could make left from right, Jungkook broke the kiss and turned you around, pressing his chest into your back.

Heat rocketed to your face as you were suddenly reminded that you were in a room full of people, kissing Jungkook like this.

Your worries were soon eased as he began to press a trail of kisses down your neck, causing you to sigh.

“Wanna blow this popsicle stand? I’ve got a bottle of Malibu in my room with our name on it.” He murmured into your neck.

For a moment, you wondered if you should say no. If Jungkook kept touching you like this, especially with alcohol in your system, there was no guarantee what you’d do.

You let out a squeak as Jungkook’s tongue found your neck, the hot muscle dancing against your skin.

Letting your eyes roll over the room, you froze as they met a familiar pair.

Kiri was stood by the DJ Booth, eyes fixated on you two, her stare cold and unmoving.

Suddenly, a feeling came over you. It felt hot and not in the nice way Jungkook had been making you feel. You hardened your stare, holding her eyes. Was this why Jungkook kissed you? Did he know Kiri was watching?

Sensing the way you had tense against him, Jungkook pulled away from your neck.

“Something wrong?”

Fine. If Jungkook wanted to put on a show for her, then you were happy to assist.

Instead of replying, you turned your head and answered with your mouth, kissing him in a way you knew Kiri wouldn’t be able to ignore.

“Let’s get outta here.” You breathed as you broke the kiss.

Jungkook’s eyes were dark, eyelids low as a positively devilish smirk crept over him.

Following him as he lead you out of the room, you couldn’t help but glance behind you, the sides of your mouth curling up as you met Kiri’s glare once more.

5K notes · View notes

million-gil-messiah · 3 years ago

Text

Brother, Where Art Thou?

Maybe life couldn’t get better...but it could certainly get worse.

It wouldn’t have been Levi’s first thought, sitting in VIP with a belly full of scotch and a neck full of kisses yet as he turned his head to allow his company a better range of access, his half-lidded gaze caught sight of something odd. A poster. He could admit, the high value reward had been his first consideration, up until he began to look more closely at the features of the man depicted. He almost didn’t recognize him at first, eyes widening first with shock, confusion, and then disbelief. It couldn’t be.

Leviticus stared, utterly transfixed by the familiar features which had likely been captured with nothing more than charcoal and a vague description on a hanging slip of worn canvas that read ‘WANTED: DEAD or ALIVE’ with a list of transgressions against the Ul dynasty and the Syndicate. He could admit, even as a pureblood, that despite the savagery of a hand-print over the digital renditions of his homeland, the artistry was remarkably detailed. Uncanny. Like staring at a ghost that had traveled through time. Older, but the features were much the same. At least what he could tell.

The shaggy and beast-like quality of dual-toned hair was hidden behind a hood, so that made it impossible to be certain, but the shape of the chin, his nose...No. That’d be insanity. He was supposed to be dead. The way he gazed hauntingly up at him from beneath the dirty, savage warpaint of people no better than the beast tribes themselves was familiar too. When he looked at the details, he saw ‘silver’ where the eye color should be, and his blood went cold. No.

His face soured immediately when he read a line with his own argent gaze and it wasn’t the stipulation of a high-value gil reward delivered only on proof of life written so small he might have missed it on a cursory glance that bothered him. It was his sweet mother’s maiden name, his last name printed above all the charges. “MAX”. The many other aliases provided in detail weren’t familiar to him but they didn’t have to be once he started noting the details.

He might have been uncertain about what he was seeing before, but the name confirmed his suspicions with a curse. On the page, depicted in detail was his stupid little half-breed of a half-brother, and he spoke the only name not on that page. Roman. It was one thing to be a heathen, it was another thing to drag their mother’s good name through the mud and now that he was looking he saw further details that stood out to him. The nature of the weapon was familiar to him even, and though crude, he thought he could make out the details of a crest upon the frame of the gunblade.

Another press of soft lips sought attention through the underside of his jaw, yet rather than inspiring passion as it had only moments before, Leviticus only seemed irritated by the woman’s persistence. She fussed, and it only made him more irritable.

“Take your gil and go.” he indicated, and snapped his fingers to have a bit of coin delivered to their table. The woman, he couldn’t remember her name...Clara, Claudia, or maybe Carla -- not that it mattered to him -- seemed indignant. Offended.

“I’m not just some fucking whore, asshole.” Which was true enough, as he’d only picked her up from the bar over the barge before escorting her to VIP. The stay was up though, and his patience for her evaporated.

“That’s not what your bedroom habits say, Ciara. And you’re still going to take this gil, and get the fuck out my face.” All his charm from before was now invested in a ‘Go Fuck Yourself’ smile, his tone a patronizing kind of benevolent. The hand across his face was swift enough, and when Rhotti stepped forward to handle her, Levi halted him with a motion and instead gestured for the poster while he absently rubbed his jaw.

“It’s Veronica you asshole.” After which, Veronica did in fact take the gil and leave in a flurry of skirts and clicking heels. Not even close to correct in his guesstimates, but Laura’s name was forgotten almost as soon as she was out of sight. Rhotti had ripped the poster from the billboard in that time and brought it up to the man that cut his checks and all though he was silent, there was a question brewing in his lone, blue eye.

“You know who this is?”

“Not really, boss. Some wannabe hero cause trouble out on the roads for a couple guys. None of ours. Yet.” he shrugs his big shoulders and Leviticus squints.

“Yet? How about never.” he shakes his head with an almost disgusted look twisting the thin lines of his lips, snatching the paper and looking it over. “I want to get more on this guy. And bring me back whatever, or whoever you find that knows better.”

“...Do you know who this is?” the brutish roe asked, and Levi gave a dismissive hand wave.

“Oh.~ You know me. I just like staying on top of problems.” he notes with a casual air as he stands and adjusts the front of his suit. “Have a few more drinks, Rhotti. Enjoy the rest of the night...Tomorrow though--”

“Back to business. You got it, boss.”

#stories

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cjm-anime-manga · 4 years ago

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My last piece of 2020 and first piece of 2021. From a black and white sketch to a full color digital rendition. Also Kurama is my favorite Yu Yu Hakusho character, so I really love this piece. I think it's one of my best so far.

#90s anime #anime art #art #anime #fanart #yu yu hakusho #youko kurama #black and white #digital art

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phoenotopia · 4 years ago

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2020 July Update

Things have gone slowly... again.

The good news is that the game is now submitted to the console "authority" and it's entirely off my hands. Once it gets through the console "checking" process, it can get a release date and we can sprint towards release. Until then, it'd be at least a month's wait or more until I hear anything. Understandably, their checking process is impacted by Corona, so wait times are increased.

On my end, I was also slow to submit the game. I submitted it late late June, since I ended up spending 7 weeks fixing bugs (and not 2-3 weeks like I estimated in the last blog post). There were just SO many bugs - now squished, thankfully. Since this is a blog post, I'll talk about what kind of bugs I've been fixing.

The other thing that slowed down the submission process was simply due to unfamiliarity with how these submissions proceed. There were pages and pages of stuff to read, guidelines to follow, and legalese to wade through. It really made me wish I had a publisher to guide me through the process. But I was able to clear it with a couple days work. I had an impression that the submission process went like A->B->C->D, with no room for concurrency. Turns out I could have done steps B & C at the same time and sped things up by 2 weeks... So that's that. I'm taking that as a lesson for next time.

The Console Revealed

What is this console that I talk about so stealthily? So that this blog update isn't completely unexciting, I'll reveal which console I've been working on until now. Drumroll please!

It's Switch!

We actually got the Switch dev kit in late 2017. From my understanding, around this time in the USA, the Switch kit was quite hard to get for indies as it was just starting out and high in demand. So I was surprised that my application got approved. I didn't know it then, but the game would still need a few more years of development...

Tweaking performance and fixing bugs

Here you can see my "expert" playtest setup. Since the Switch is more powerful while docked, I needed to playtest it in handheld mode, so I could catch and profile any problem areas where the framerate was unsteady. The most common thing that caused framerate drops were areas that went overboard with lighting. For these areas, I'd tweak or swap out the lights with alternatives that looked similar while also being less computationally intensive. Maintaining 60 FPS is a must!

An old camera (Nikon D3100) trained at the screen recorded my playthrough and would let me rewind to any moment a bug occurred. It could only record in 10 minute chunks, so I'd have to repeatedly repress the record button. On the plus side, because it's so old the movie file sizes were small and convenient.

The number one bug that I tracked and fixed in the past two months was what I dub the "Gear Ring De-equip" bug. The Gear Ring functions as customizable shortcut keys for the player to map items and tools (see an old video demonstration HERE). Through regular use of the inventory, somehow the equipped items on the Gear Ring would be de-equipped. It was an elusive bug since the de-equip event would happen very quietly and you would only suspect something had gone wrong much later. By then, the trail had gone cold and you weren't sure if a de-equip had actually occurred or if the player had simply de-equipped the item themselves. Two other playtesters noted that something left the Gear Ring in their playthrough, but I dismissed them. "Are you sure you didn't just de-equip it yourself?" It was a bug that bred mistrust and discord. I didn't truly believe it until it happened to me...

Luckily, with the camera setup, I was finally able to track it. In the literal 67th video, I caught a live instance of the bug occurring. After which, it was all too easy to recreate the exact same inventory and gear ring setup and replicate it.

(With this exact item layout, combine the 2nd item with the 14th item... and viola! Gear Ring de-equip!)

After fixing this bug, I then proceeded to fix it 5 more times. Every time I fixed it, it would later reappear through a different mechanism.

Why do bugs like this happen? Underneath, there are two lists of items. Tools on the right and items on the left. Items can occur multiple times because they're consumable. Both lists start counting their indexes with the value 0. However, both items and tools co-exist on the gear ring. So to uniquely identify an entry you need both the item ID and the data index. Failure to check both data types resulted in bugs like the Gear Ring de-equip. Now throw in a bunch of item operations that can confuse the system. You can split items, combine items, swap items, or discard items. The more freedom you allow, the more ways there are for the system to trip up.

If you didn't get all that, that's alright. It was needlessly complicated. Imagine doing more and better and with less code and less bugs! Such a thing is possible if you start with the right design. I'm definitely taking notes here on how to design inventory systems for next time. In the meanwhile, I'm very confident I've squished all inventory related bugs.

Other bugs squashed and features implemented in the past 2 months include the end game arts not unlocking properly, collection percentages climbing beyond 100, stray doors floating in the sky, low HP sfx blaring when loading different files, balance tweaks on bosses, a max HP display when the menu is open - too many to count really! It was only after I fixed them all that I was confident enough to move forward with submitting the game. I apologize for the delay this will cause!

PC version back in progress

You may recall in the March 2020 update I talk about how in pursuing the Switch version, I unwittingly ruined the PC version. Well, since the game is "done" now and I'm waiting for it to go through the checking process, I've started working to reclaim the PC version.

And there is some good news to report. The PC version can compile again! Of course, it will need to have some work done, since it was late 2017 when I last had a functioning PC build.

The opening menu is broken, the underlying save file system needs to be updated, and the controls... oh Lord, the controls. Controls were probably the #1 factor in pushing me to pursue a console version first. There are just so many controller options. Even just the usual suspects are numerous: Xbox, Nintendo, Sony, Logitech, Hori, 8Bitdo, Steam...

One of the number one complaints received regarding the flash game (which was keyboard primarily) was that I didn't allow controller rebinding to start. It was then that I learned of the vast array of different keyboard types.

(Ever heard of an Azerty keyboard?)

I shan't make the same mistake twice! One of the things I'll definitely tackle is the Right/Left face button feud when it comes to which should one should be 'confirm' and which one is 'cancel'. I want to allow the player to choose which is their "YES" and "NO" preference and allow that to overlap other actions like Attack or Jump.

Even after control bindings are taken care of, some things just won't translate well. The right control stick is currently used to access the gear ring and for fishing. Keyboards have no right stick. Aiming the crossbow with a full 360 degrees of range is done with the left control stick - if keyboard only, would the crossbow simply be locked to the 8 cardinal directions? What about those tutorial prompts with button graphics (e.g. "Press 'B' to Jump"). If using the playstation controller, it'd need to be the CROSS symbol. How many button graphics are we gonna load into the text module? What if the player, mid-playthrough, decides to swap out controllers? Indeed, there are many issues to tackle where controls are concerned...

Perhaps I'm overthinking it because even some AAA games get this wrong (Dark Souls has 'B' as 'Yes' on Switch, and it's not remappable, which I find quite annoying). I've seen games on consoles where the controls wouldn't mention the console's controller at all but instead mention a mouse and keyboard. Or, if you remapped the controls, the tutorial prompts still showed the old control bindings, making for a confusing experience. I definitely want to do the controls justice, so this will take some time.

Phoenotopia DISCORD Channels

Ryan and Firana have been running a Phoenotopia discord since late 2017, which I promoted on this blog once. It's been a couple years and it turns out that the old discord link I promoted expired. It's long overdue, but their channel could use another shoutout. Here's their channel : https://discord.gg/cnjrYST

Also, Khalid recently reached out to me about creating a Phoenotopia discord as well. I see no reason why we can't have 2 or more discords, so he has created that one with my blessing as well. You can find his discord here : https://discord.gg/cfnsCwy

I personally don't use Discords, since I'm very busy and there's too much new tech to keep up with. I hear there's a Tik Tok now? Should I create a Tik Tok for Phoenotopia? Hmmm...

Anyway, if you'd like to chat with other people who are similarly enthused for Phoenotopia, do check them out!

Fan Arts

We have five new fanart submissions this time around from regulars and new alike.

Cody G. returns with this pair of sketches of Gail. One seeks to answer the question, "how is Gail so strong?" Cody's answer is that under her sleeves she's actually really buff! This might be the most ripped rendition of Gail yet. Also, in the right drawing, the letter 'E' kinda melds with her bat, making it look like a keyblade!

What if Gale was a Shrek character? A new artist, Samu Kajin, from tumblr answers that question with a rendition of Gail sporting ogre style antennae. Samu Kajin says she can be called "Gaek" or "Shrale". I like the poncho!

Shafiyahh returns with a pretty portrait of Gail. Unlike their previous digital pieces, this one was made with color pencils! I like how her hair blends pink and purple colors together, and this pattern is also present in the eyes. Reminds me of a certain character. And the eyes are so sparkly despite using color pencils! Major props!

Negativus Core also returns with this relevant image of Gail, masked and running, presumably from Corona. It gave me quite a chuckle! I like the angle and tilt of this run pose because you can see the sole of her foot - that's how you know she's at full sprint! A skillful blur localized to her left foot show's just the right amount of motion. Gotta love the robot's expression too!

A rare 3D art has emerged. Dany Q crafted this adorable figure of Gail that is as cute as a button! I like how well it translates the pixel character over to 3D, capturing the 3 stitches on her shirt and even catching her stray strand of hair. It kinda reminds me of a Wallace and Gromit character, so I can picture it moving and animating in that unique claymation style.

Next Time

I'm ~80% confident we can clear the Switch console checking process and drop the trailer with a release date before the next blog post. But once again, if things go slowly, you'll hear from us in 2 months...

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action · 5 years ago

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#Women’sHistoryMonth Spotlight: Brianna Pippens

Our next #Women’sHistorySpotlight is Washington D.C visual artist, @banana-peppers. Brianna expresses her freedom through her work, re-creating artworks through the lens of Black womanhood. Let’s dive right in.

Tell us about yourself. How did your love of creating art start?

My name is Brianna Pippens, artistically known as Banana Peppers. I am a visual and performing artist currently residing in Washington, DC. I grew up singing and dancing in various groups and fell in love with performing. I remember my parents taking me to museums and filling the house with paintings by and of Black people. Early on, the spark to create was there, but it wasn’t until college that I really began to see the potential to create on a larger scale and reach more people. I met other creative artists that really inspired me to tap into different mediums and create from my own perspective and I learned so much about the freedom there is in expressing myself, whether it’s with paint, or even digitally.

You created an incredible rendition of Girl with a Pearl Earring, in which the subject is a Black woman. Talk to us about the importance of that?

Girl with a Pearl Earring is a painting that I remember seeing a lot growing up and always, like many, wondered about the story behind it. I decided to recreate it because I wanted to show that the same allure and beauty could be found if she was a Black woman. I think it’s important for Black people, especially women, to feel seen in many different ways because we are multifaceted. The thinking is really tied to how a lot of people of color grow up watching shows and seeing images of people that look nothing like us but find connections to them in little ways. However, it’s not really the case when the situation is reversed. I think it’s important to normalize images of Black beauty and strength.

How do you embody the mission of #BlackExcellence365 in your everyday work?

While I am on a path to becoming a full-time artist, I currently have a nine-to-five in a pretty non-diverse environment. I embody what I deem to be Black excellence by being my authentic self every day. Beyond that, in my day-to-day life as an artist, I put forth the best I can, paying homage to those before me that shaped who I am and how I feel as a Black woman in society. I also show the process of creating, which sometimes isn’t that glamourous, but a conduit to excellence nonetheless. Lastly, I think that I embody #BlackExcellence365 by celebrating my heritage and recognizing the magic that pumps through us by supporting and uplifting others.

If you had any advice for women succeeding in the art industry, what would be?

My best advice to women in the art industry is to constantly look for opportunities to share your work with communities of like-minded people. From posting fan art, I have been flown to Los Angeles to meet Jordan Peele and the cast of Us, I’ve been able to provide work for many film marketing campaigns, and have been able to get support from some of my favorite, most inspirational women, such as Cree Summer, Jada Pinkett Smith, and even Michelle Obama. Take risks and put yourself out there—it can be intimidating but so rewarding. Take the time you need and don’t stretch yourself thin, I know sometimes it can seem like a crazy idea to turn down an opportunity, but know that choosing what you want to contribute to and what you want to align yourself with is just as important as creating.

Thank you for sharing your story, @banana-peppers. We can’t wait to see what you create next! Tumblr, what is your favorite piece by Brianna?

#blackexcellence365 #Women's History Month #banana peppers #Women's History Spotlight

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untitledtallgeesepodcast · 4 years ago

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There were a total of five OSTs released for Gundam Wing (the fifth was dedicated to the music of Endless Waltz, which will not be covered in this post or this playlist). Caitlin asked if I (Cathy) would create a playlist of my favorites. I didn't think she expected I would also write a novel. But here we go.

Let’s listen to some of the music of Gundam Wing!

(All song titles will be described with their English name and also the strangely romanized Spotify name.)

There are three main categories of Gundam Wing OST songs: (1) shoot 'em up fighting tracks which usually feature loud riffs, drums, and blats and blares coming at you at the same speed and frequency of mobile suits firing pointlessly at the Gundams, (2) instrumental, orchestral songs meant for the intermission period of a ballet that was never written or performed, or (3) synthy stuff with saxophones that wouldn't be out of place in a dingy rainy bar scene of a tame movie from the 80s. Most of the really recognizable tracks are in the first OST. OST 2 tends towards less interesting instrumental waltz-like stuff, Sanq Kingdom ballroom music as I've termed it in my head. They're fine, tolerable pieces of music, but you don't hear them and instantly think "Gundam Wing." By the time you get to OST 3, you're digging into the really deep cuts of Gundam Wing OST tracks, some of which I don't remember being in the show at all. (OST 4 is almost entirely character songs.)

We open with two of the best OPs—nay, songs—to have ever been made, "Just Communication" and "Rhythm Emotion," both by TWO-MIX. "Rhythm Emotion" was not, as you may have imagined, a mid-season swap-out. It was only used for about 10 episodes, and you may have even forgotten what it sounded like until just this moment, but "Rhythm Emotion" is no slacker. With alien, wintery synths that make you feel like you're soaring through the sky and between enemy mobile suits, this is one of those songs you would hear heavily remixed for knock-off DDR machines in arcades for years to come. The breakdown is cheesy, overemotional, and yet gives me the same goosebumps I would feel, years later, when listening to Love Live's "Snow Halation." Its more accomplished older sister, "Just Communication," dates itself from its opening note, but it owns its place in time and history unapologetically. Timeless, instantly recognizable, and eminently singable, you could, as Caitlin says in Episode 1, play this in a karaoke room full of randos and you're guaranteed to have someone scream along. There are some songs that make everyone feel like the star of their own shounen anime when they hear it, and "Just Communication" is one of them. Turning it up full volume in your car is like blasting "Take My Breath Away" while speeding on a motorcycle with a leather jacket. You are invincible through all 4:20 minutes of this song.

After that, perhaps one of the most famous instrumental tracks from the series: "The Wings of a Boy that Killed Adolescence / Shisyunki wo Koroshita Syonen no Tsubasa." (That boy is Heero Yuy. I know you know that, but this OST makes it explicit with its last instrumental track, "Code Name Heero Yuy," which is just another version of this melody.) There are a lot of songs like this, fighting tracks that hurry along at a clip, heroic but a little bit anxious ("When the Dragon Swims / Ryu ga Oyogutoki...," "Break Out," "Scattering Left Light / Kakusansuru Zanko" which barely sounds like music and is clearly hoping to be the soundtrack to your next laser tag game). I want to call out among them "Mission Accomplished / Ninmu Suiko," which has a last half that is so tied in my head to the world of Gundam Wing that when I hear it, I am instantly transported. It's almost a letdown that it's just an OST track, because it builds up such amazing tension that it releases just as quickly. "Mission Accomplished" is a bridge between these energetic tracks and more headbang-y, hard metal type fight songs like "Use the Cloak of Darkness / Kurayami Karano Tsukai," one of my all-time favorite guitar riffs from the GW OSTs. A lot of OST 1 is full of this "Enter Sandman" type stuff, though you still get reprises in the later OSTs, like "Well-Planned Tactics / Butsuryo Sakusen." The back half of "Cloak of Darkness," though, is a completely different track, this time pure fascist military fantasy. A lot of OSTs were like this, two short BGMs together masquerading as a one- to two-minute track. I'm not sure if it was just more expensive to list out a bunch of 45 second tracks, or if Otani Kou just ran out of emo names for all of them.

One thing I didn’t realize until this project is that there are no less than five variations on Relena’s theme in OST 1 alone:

Soft Hair and See-through Eyes / Yawarakana Kami...

Inside the Girl's Heart... / Syojyo no Mune no Oku Niwa...

To Beauty, to Elegance, and to Noble-mindedness / Karen ni Yuga ni...

I Feel Like I Can Cross Even That Rainbow Bridge / Ano Niji...

As Relena Peacecraft / Relena Peacecraft Toshite

When you've heard one, you've heard them all, so I’m putting on "Soft Hair...,” the wonderfully 80s and slightly boozy "adult contemporary" version of it, completely with a Kenny G sax. The others feel much more pure and dignified, especially "To Beauty...," which I think of as "waltz music" as it shows up in many of the early series' ballroom scenes. ”Rainbow Bridge..." is a worthy remix/variant, and for another similar boozy 80s feel, also try "Coolheaded Bloodthirstiness / Reitetsu na sakki" from OST 1. While I’ve left most of this playlist in chronological album order, I’ve moved up "I Believed We'd Meet / Kanarazu Aeruto Shinji” from OST 3. This track is not particularly noteworthy to me, but I leave it here as an example of how even later in the series, Otani Kou makes references to this refrain, even if it's not played note for note.

Because like any good soundtrack, Gundam Wing reuses themes and motifs. "Searching for Peace Buried Amid the Corpses / Shikabane ni Umoreta..." and "That Clown Doesn't Need Make Up for Tears / Sono Doukeshi..." share the same melody, only one is a fighting song and another is a mourning song. I actually like the rendition in "Hourglass of a Sad Color / Kanashimi-iro no Sunadokei" (also from OST1) better, but while "Hourglass" is a straightforward BGM track, "That Clown..." shows off one of the more interesting aspects of the Gundam Wing OSTs: its frequent blending of synths, cheesy sax, and more classic orchestral strings. You can hear it in second half of "That Clown...", but also in tracks like "Unknown Pressure / Michi no Pressure," or OST 3's " Behind The Scenes of The Blackout / Anten no Butaiura de," which is a typical "woe is me" orchestral track that is for some reason constantly interrupted by digital "beep boop" mumblings. Without that blend, you're left with a lot of grave-sounding tracks with bombastic Phantom of the Opera-worthy brass sections, like "Soldiers Who Don't Have a Gravepost / Bhyounaki Senshitachi" or "Legend of Zero / Zero no Densetsu." Not that those songs are bad, which is why I include the last of the instrumental tracks from OST 3: "Who Will Give Their Life / Darega Tameni Inochi," which takes itself very seriously and very earnestly, just like the show itself.

One of the other frequent moods of these OST is anxiety, perhaps no better demonstrated than "You Can Hear a Voice Calling the Soul /Tamashii wo Yobu Koe ga Suru", which has a guitar emitting screeches of existential despair. “Signs of Consciousness / Ishiki no Taido" is from this same school, but its second half is more "I am walking into a rave already a few minutes into what I know is going to be a bad trip," which is not really a mood I remember from the series itself. By the time you get to OST 3, you start venturing into tracks that wouldn't be out of place in a horror film. You can hear an example of it in "The Eyes of a Mobile Doll / Mobile Doll no Me," which is on this list because it sounds like a fever dream, but you could also check out "The Abandoned Horse of the Age / Jidai no Sutegoma," which is not on this playlist and has the same effect. Some of them, like "I Don't Like Fairytales / Otogi-banashi wa Sukijyanai," are inspiringly atmospheric, almost hypnotic. Is Gundam Wing horror? [Treize Voice] Yes, the Horror of War.

Some quick call-outs in the odds and ends group: “Tokimeite Harmony” is the 3x4 theme, a literal duet between a violin and a flute, and it’s there for that reason and that reason alone. I could not tell you for the life of me where in the series “Yasuragi no Hitotoki...”, “Kizuna,” “Sonzai Syomei,” or “Kioku no Gyakuryu” come from, but they sound like beautiful tracks from a video game I’ve never played. Similarly, “That Day Was The Last Day I Saw Your Smile / Anohi Saigo ni Mita Egao” is uncharacteristically fluttery and beautiful for a Gundam Wing OST piece, an almost Ghibli-esque track which nevertheless ends on an anxiety-inducing note of unrest.

And finally, the character songs. I leave you with one for each of the six main characters, and then a bonus.

Heero Yuy: "With Only My Words / Oredake no Kotoba de." Did you expect Heero's singing voice to sound like this? Neither did I. I have no idea why they thought this was a good image song for Heero. It's not. I leave it here because you must listen to it. The better "sounding" song is "Flying Away," which shows up in this CD later, but it doesn't give me the same dissonance as this one.

Duo Maxwell: “Wild Wing.” "Good Luck & Good Bye" is the superior song. (there's a little bit of Wang Chung “Everybody Have Fun Tonight" to it), but the sheer hilarity of this chorus (WILD WING BOYS!) means that i have to include it.

Trowa Barton: “Clown / Doukeshi.” What to say about this? This is a typical ballad, something you may play during a romantic moment of a kdrama or during the slow motion death scene in a Hong Kong film that would be released around the same time as GW was. I feel bad for Nakahara Shigeru who clearly is straining himself singing this. but it is nothing if not period accurate.

Quatre Raberba Winner: “Star’s Gaze / Hoshi no Manazashi.” Poor Orikasa Ai. Quatre’s voice is passably bishounen in the series itself, but it's hard to hide that his seiyuu was a woman when it came to the image songs. That said, her voice has a much fuller quality than her fellow pilots, and this is actually a decent-enough filler song. You could imagine debuting an idol maybe in the late 80s with this track.

Chang Wufei: “Knock at Tomorrow's Door / Asu eno Door wo Tatake.” If Wing were a kpop group, Wufei would be the rapper. You don't get to argue with me here. It's hard enough to imagine Wufei actually singing, but Ishino Ryuzou's singing voice also doesn't bear that much resemblance to the voice he adopted for the character.

Relena Peacecraft: “Love is Not Crying Yet / Ai wa Mada Nakanai.” One of the most unexpected of the image songs is this bossa nova inspired track for Relena. Like Orikasa's ballad, this song almost works as a real song, and the purity of Yajima Akiko's voice is incredibly charming, which makes it all that more surprising that she's actually best known for being the seiyuu to the eponymous Shin-chan of Crayon Shin-Chan.

I do not include the image songs for Zechs and Treize, simply because they're boring. Both of them are extremely well-known and popular seiyuus, who have since done a number of musical projects. You can tell that they will fare better at that endeavor than Trowa’s seiyuu, but there's really nothing interesting to say about their songs. As always, the men of Gundam Wing are shown up by their female counterpart: Lady Une's "Brightness & Darkness" is positively anthemic and fun to listen to. Sayuri doesn't hit all the notes perfectly, and you can sense there is Fleetwood Mac / Stevie Nicks impersonator out there who could really knock this one out of the park, but if I were to keep one image song out of the whole bunch, it'd be this one.

#JUST WILD BEAT COMMUNICATION #gundam wing #mobile suit gundam wing #untitled tallgeese podcast #artifacts #episode 01

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