#there’s like 0% cocoa beans or whatever it’s called in there
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sapphiczula · 4 years ago
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today i offer you my villain origin story.
white chocolate
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aiweirdness · 4 years ago
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A big neural net reviews a smaller neural net's recipes
I’ve used various neural networks to generate recipes, to varying degrees of success. My earliest recipes were generated with char-rnn, which had to learn everything - spelling, punctuation, words - entirely from scratch. Its recipes were terrible (Swamp Peef and Cheese, anyone? Or Chocolate Chicken Chicken Cake?). Later when I started using GPT-2, I was using a neural net that had already seen a lot of recipes online during internet pre-training, and its recipes looked a lot more realistic (although not entirely realistic - there was that recipe for Black Forest Cake that suggested pouring the batter into a toaster, or the jello recipe that starts with “remove all internal rinds”).
GPT-3, an even more powerful text-generating neural net, has seen so many recipes during its internet pre-training that its recipes are boringly plausible. Bake its Black Forest Cake recipe and you’d probably actually get cake at the end, even if it’s not the best cake in the world. Its recipes aren’t funny at a glance, which is why I haven’t posted any of them - until internet linguist Gretchen McCulloch suggested that, rather than have GPT-3 generate its own recipes, I have it rate char-rnn’s recipes. Readers, it worked.
I prompted GPT-3 with two example recipes from allrecipes, each followed by 3 of their human-written reviews. Then, for the third recipe I inserted one of char-rnn’s recipes:
Chocolate Chocolate Cake
1 cup sugar 1/4 cup butter 1 cup margarine 1 cup cocoa 1 teaspoon vanilla 1 cup margarine 1/2 cup pecans, chopped 1 teaspoon vanilla 1 egg yolk 1/2 cup sugar 1/4 cup chopped pecans 1 cup sugar 1 teaspoon vanilla 1 cup cocoa 1 teaspoon vanilla
Combine flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, salt, and salt in a large bowl. Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly, until mixture boils and stiff peaks form. Add milk and cook until mixture is completely melted. Remove from heat and stir in sugar and sugar. Add eggs and vanilla. Beat until smooth. Spread in batter. Sprinkle with pecans.
Yield: 1 servings
And then I let GPT-3 add reviews. Would it mention the excessive lakes of vanilla? The complete lack of flour? The foolhardy reliance on the heroic efforts of a single egg yolk to hold things together?
oxtailsandturnovers Rating: 5 stars 03/04/2007 delicious chocolate recipe!!! and the perfect balance between cocoa and chocolate. and they sure were LONGNECKS! big time rave here. lazy w birthdays w friends and family, try this recipe for something chocolate sweet the ppl will talk about over and over.
AKEMIYUNA Rating: 5 stars appraisal 12/03/2008 Excellent for the kids Halloween party. Everyone got so thrilled by seeing something new on Chocolate in sponge. He even likes nuts separately but it will taste good..
BYOMFYABF Rating: 2 stars 10/01/2008 I could only give it a 2 as I had to make changes to it due to ingredients I had. First, I used Dove Dark Chocolate cocoa instead of Hershey's, no nuts, and the mashed bananas and caramel topping were a must. I did use coffee instead of the hot water, and dark margarine instead of regular, therefore I could not use light whipped cream, but I made homemade whipped cream. It had WAY too much flour in it, but i guess it could have been me measuring heavier than I should have. I also only used 2 cups of flour. it was my first bundt cake, so it was huge!!!
Here’s another batch of reviews, this time of a more chaotic char-rnn recipe:
Simple Soup Alaborate Soup Pie
6 each chopped white perserves; ** (optional but ring) 1/2 cup chopped fresh marjoram 1/2 teaspoon dried thyme 1/3 teaspoon salt 1/2 cup thinly sliced onion 1/4 cup onion (chopped) 1/2 teaspoon garlic; minced 2 small carrots 6 can dry white wine 1 tabasco sauce 1 tablespoon sugar 1/2 cup flour, whipped topping 2 tablespoon chili powder
Marinate: Serves 4. Whip and short under boiling. Add the sliced mushrooms and peppers and stir to coat. Stir the sugar and carrots. In large bowl, beat the egg to make a 1 1/2 tablespoons of the flour. Add shanks and stir it well. Spoon into a frying pan before serving.
Recipe By : DonajehLi Koubmanda
Yield: 8 servings
JEFFREY97389 Rating: 2 stars 03/03/2006 Even though everyone said this was great, I thought it was just 'OK!' The perserves gave a strange flavor to the sauce.
MATTJANDTRACER Rating: 2 stars 01/02/2009 This recipe sounded good. When it came out it tasted a bit like a casserole and not a stew. I used venison instead of deer and pork. I liked the way it turned out, but it wasnt very French.
Hammy Rating: 5 stars The g iving this as a gift as it takes about 10 less minutes but using American cheese and not blended with parsley flakes, lime-flavored gelatin, which is my husband's favorite dish from SuperValu. Just happens to be the creamy sauce. Don't worry about a pie crust.
In fact, the more chaotic the char-rnn recipe, the more chaotic the reviews tend to be, as if GPT-3 has picked up on the chaos and is trying to somehow produce reviews that could plausibly be written by whatever weird humans are visiting this mangled recipe website.
Geilded Peanuts & Crabmeat Basil
3 beef, boneless chops, or thyme, 1 lamber and flince of fresh diced in diagonal 1 parsley 2 large leeks (for garnish) 3/4 teaspoon sesame oil, seeded and peeled 1 any jeans'l-tortilla 1 pepper or cinnamon 1/4 cup baesly pinto beans. (Crushed and thawed; minced fine you recipe) 1 tomato base 1 fat in the last 5 inch plates 1 garlic clove; crushed 1/4 cup dijon mustard
In a large bowl set aside. Remove the sides from the heat and saute with a fork and cover and cook on Low for 6 to 6 hours.
Yield: 6 servings
Morales Rating: 0 stars 03/30/2008 I had high expectations for this recipe, but it was an outright flop. I don't know if the measurements were somehow incorrect or what, but I ended up with a watery mess that certainly wasn't crab salad. My girlfriend, who is a new chef liked it fine, but I really wish that the recipe didn't claim that it made six servings when it really made enough for one, if that's what we were going to call it.
Carole Rating: 5 stars Glorious sobs! This recipe will be delicious for a minumum of 1½ Hours to maximum 2½ hours Time to bring lots of fresh sized potatoes in the house or grow in the age may become quite famous
Amanda Rating: 3 stars 11/13/2009 My friend is having a birthday party and will celebrate with Camping. She's in charge of the dishes and wanted to serve food at the campfire. I'll 10th grade, my easy information for her party. It will not sound strange anyway test this task with a note to work rationally.What to take trees, portable tables for chairs, the main meal, food. I personally love the taste of it but has anyone seen a shepherd (wasn't any spices), oysters. It is sufficient
It does kind of make sense that GPT-3’s recipe reviews aren’t directly complaining about the utter weirdness of char-rnn’s recipes. Probably very few of the recipe reviews in GPT-3’s training data involved baffled complaints about nonexistent or repeated ingredients, or apocalyptic levels of recipe failure. So GPT-3 has learned that even the critical reviews tend to fall within a certain sentiment range. It’s interesting that it tries to emulate char-rnn’s primitive neural net glitchiness - I’ve noticed before that GPT-3 seems to be capable of pretending to be a much simpler neural net.
Subscribers get bonus content: After generating a few reviews, GPT-3 would sometimes go on to generate new recipes (such as “BBQ Cheeseburger Salad” which contains lime jello, whipped topping, and sliced black beans). It may have been deliberately trying to make them terrible to fit in with char-rnn’s recipes.
Speaking of AI-generated recipes: there are some absolute disasters in my book on AI, You Look Like a Thing and I Love You: Amazon - Barnes & Noble - Indiebound - Tattered Cover - Powell’s - Boulder Bookstore
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bards-witcher · 6 years ago
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For the prompt what about some pandawrecker? :0 Like they could be parents? Idk ;^; thank you! 🌹
Hey! Thanks so much for the request :D, I’m so sorry how long it took to do for you though :/
I hope you like it but if not I’ll be happy to do something else for you :)
[Anthony POV]
As he pulled into the driveway he couldn’t be happier that he was finally home. Whilst he loved to spend time with his friends and meet his fans, this had been the longest he’d spent away from his family and he’d been gradually counting down the days until he’d walk through his front door again.
He missed Ohm crawling into the bed at 4am in the morning having just finished editing his third video that day, how the older man would fall on top of him, only he couldn’t be mad when that same man would curl himself tightly around him with a mumbled ‘love you’ before falling asleep.
He missed Hazel, their four-year-old daughter, running into their room at whatever ungodly hour she woke up at to practically drag him out of bed to come to watch cartoons with her whilst he plaits her hair.
He missed how Ashley, their two-year-old daughter, would immediately raise her hands when he entered the room, begging him to lift her which he was all too happy to oblige, throwing her into the air whilst she giggled excitedly, always wanting to go higher.
He misses the random little moments throughout the day which he has no explanation for, how one time he came home to find Ohm carrying a laughing Ashley as they chased a squealing Hazel around the house and calling it an Ash rush, which when asked Ohm would only giggle at.
It was a quick walk from the car to the front door, barely taking a step through the doorway before Hazel came running up to him shouting ‘daddy daddy’ excitedly. He dropped his suitcase in favor of picking up his daughter, twirling her around before settling her on his hip.
“Miss me?” he asked, already knowing the answer as she told him yes before hugging him, keeping her arms tight around him as he made his way further into the house.
“Go to the kitchen daddy, we made a cake for you” She started wriggling around in his arms as if trying to direct him there, but he kept a tight hold of her as he moved towards the living room.
“I will in a second baby, but let’s get dad and Ash first” he couldn’t help the smile at the sight that greeted him as he entered the living room.
Ohm was sleeping on the couch, patches of flour and cocoa over his face and clothes and snoring gently, whilst Ashley sat on top of his chest playing with the drawstrings of the hoodie Ohm was wearing. Ashley was quick to notice him, letting out an excited screech as she raised her hands, he quickly walked over to the couch, placing a quick kiss on Ohms’ forehead before picking her up with his free arm and vacating the room before the noise woke Ohm up.
It was then that Hazel renewed her efforts to get him to the kitchen, placing Ash onto the kitchen island when he got there and dropping Hazel gently onto the floor so that she could retrieve the cake.
He graciously accepted the cake that was handed to him, ‘Welcome Home’ was scrawled messily on top of the even messier chocolate frosting, a myriad of sprinkles and silver balls were scattered across the top. Some would call it a mess, he’d call it perfect.
He thanked both of them, giving them a kiss on the forehead before getting a knife to start cutting up slices for them.
“Do you know who will love to have some of this cake with us?” He asked them, both of them looking confused as they shook their heads. “Mr. Bear, Dolly and Abigail” Both of them perked up instantly, Hazel running up the stairs to arrange the tea party with her assortment of toys, whilst he tried to stop Ashley from grabbing fistfuls of cake long enough to cut it.
 [Ohm POV]
He woke up startled, he hadn’t meant to fall asleep but long nights and early mornings meant that he stood little chance of staying awake once he’d sat on the couch. However, his children were nowhere to be seen, he called out to them, hoping that maybe they were playing a game nearby, but there was no answer.
He rushed out of the living room, ever-darkening thoughts crossing his mind before he heard screaming and laughing coming from upstairs.
He walked into the girls’ room to find Anthony slowly falling off of a bean bag whilst Hazel tried to tickle him. All the while Ashley was sitting contentedly as she tried to eat the cake in front of her, although she was just adding the growing amount around her mouth.
“What’s going on here then?” He fought to hide his smile as he tried to look as stern as possible.
“Daddy ate Mr. Bears cake”
“No, I didn’t, I was just keeping it safe for dad” Even from the doorway he could see the disapproving and doubtful look that Hazel threw at him.
“Well dad’s here now and I’d like some cake please” he said as he entered the room, noticing how Anthony’s face was starting to go red as he tried to think of an excuse.
“Well, you see dad took so long that I got hungry-“
“So, you did eat it” Hazel screamed, and he couldn’t stop his giggles at the scene in front of him as Anthony tried to crawl away from their daughter who kept trying to tickle him.
“C’mon Hazel, lets get him” With that, he got on all fours and launched his own attack on Anthony, and it wasn’t long before the both of them were out of breath with laughter and bright red in the face.
They lay for a minute to catch their breath, Hazel abandoning them to serve more tea to her guests whilst Ashley was finger-painting with the remainder of her cake.
“Welcome home Jigglesworth” he murmured just loud enough that only Anthony would hear him, the younger man turning his head to press a chaste kiss against his lips.
“I’ve missed you guys so damn much”
“We missed you too, don’t ever leave for that long again” he pouted, which Anthony only chuckled at.
“I don’t plan to” They kissed briefly again and stayed close whilst Hazel started to sing some song she’d just made up, Ashley adding her own little hum and shout here and there to contribute to the song. “I love you, ya nerd”
He smiled at the nickname, “I love you too”
They shared one more chaste kiss which was quickly stopped by Hazel telling them that they’d run out of tea. With a sigh, he got up off the floor and grabbed the small play teapot to get more ‘tea’ as well as a wipe to clear up Ashley and her artwork.
For the next couple hours, they ate cake and sandwiches hunched over the little table, before tucking the girls’ in for a nap, silently making their way downstairs to huddle up together on the couch.
Neither of them lasted long before sleep took them, grateful for the next few quiet hours they had together before being woken up for their next adventure.
If any of you want me to write something for you, just shoot me an ask and I’ll try and get it done ASAP
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fmlz · 8 years ago
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rules: answer the 20 questions and tag 20 amazing followers you’d like to know better i was tagged by @dracomalfoy-png and @gorebee
name: jude!
nicknames: um i dont really hav any... ppl irl sometimes call me lou i used to have a friend that called me bean and i hav 1 friend who calls me son
zodiac sign: aquarius
height: um 5′3 its a modern day tragedy cos i suit being tall imo
orientation: ummmmm perpetually unsure. recently ive been thinking i id as. pan really but with a preference fr femininity in like. whatever form i gues
nationality: british :-(
favorite fruit: hmmmmmm this varies a lot at this very minute i want to say raspberries!
favorite season: autumn maybe?? but i like spring 2. summer would b good if it doesnt remind me of every time ive been miserable in my life pmsl :’^))
favorite book: ummmm lolita hannibal hannibal rising and the one im reading now perhaps?? its called exquisite corpse.. also maybe as my second faves revolutionary road, the collector, stoner and fool’s gold. im also reading 1 called magician atm nd its rly good but is taking me agggess
favorite flower: roses!
favorite scent: hmm im not sure... i like the smell of cheap generic perfume honestly
favorite color: um it varies a lot but i guess atm dark red or green? pinks usually pretty consistently up there
favorite animal: um dogs and rats!
coffee, tea, or hot cocoa: umm coffee i think but i enjoy hot chocolate more i just. like to abuse caffiene pmsl i dont like tea tho
average sleep hours: hmm anywhere between 0 and 10
cat or dog person: dog im a bit scared of cats
favorite fictional character: OH SO MANY
number of blankets you sleep with: 1
dream trip: russia!!!!!
blog created: ok so this one was created some time last year but i only started using it like. march/feb time this year but i had my old blog since 2013 ish?
number of followers: 120
i tag @cracksandcraters @redleader @sheepyjam @honey-nut-yurio-s @twenty-one-tons-of-life-problems @helliebonhams @uhlfric @chapelgoth @goldstagbeetle @badmorning @nicehug @ohioscreamo and uh anyone else whod like to do it im sorry if i frgot 2 tag u!
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longislandweekly-blog · 5 years ago
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There’s the sweet tooth, and then there’s the meat tooth
Every year around this time, you stock your home with as much chocolate as possible because you’re absolutely sure that despite all evidence pointing to the contrary, you’re going to have more trick-or-treaters than ever on Halloween. Well, prepare to be disappointed yet again. The sheer number of children—and no-good teenagers—trolling through neighborhoods in search of candy has been in a steep decline for at least the last decade. More and more parents are opting to take their kids to Halloween parties instead of allowing them to roam up and down darkened streets while miserable commuters speed down side streets as a shortcut to get home from work.
So what you’ll inevitably end up with is a surplus of candy that has tragically gone untricked and untreated. So what do you do? Well, if you’re like every other person over the age of 30, you’ll dump all that candy into a shopping bag, take it to your place of work, and drop it all in the communal area because you simply “cannot have all this candy around!” And you do this without considering that maybe your coworkers also don’t want to have all this candy around. You know, obesity is an ever-growing problem in this country, as is diabetes, and yet you thoughtlessly wave a Snickers bar under the noses of random people without thinking twice. Maybe the real monster wasn’t some costumed kid—maybe you were the real monster all along.
The point is, we’re all set to be sick of overly sweet chocolate this month and next. Instead of forcing candy upon coworkers, why don’t you take this opportunity to find out exactly how versatile chocolate can be?
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Chocolate Wasn’t Always Sweet
Back when chocolate was known as the “food of the gods” early in its 4,000-year history, ancient Mesoamericans consumed it as a bitter beverage rather than the way we do—as a way-too-sweet concoction loaded with garbage like sprinkles and nougat. Anthropologists have actually found traces of chocolate dating back to the year 1900 B.C., with evidence demonstrating that it was cultivated from the tropical rain forests of Central America, before the cacao beans were roasted and ground into a paste that was mixed with water, vanilla, honey, chili peppers and whatever other spices they had lying around. The result was a frothy drink that brewers believed had aphrodisiac-like affects. I’m guessing the first chocolate-drink brewers were 100 percent men.
When Spanish explorer Hernando Cortez (“Cortez the Killer,” swell guy) came to the new world in the 1500s, he observed the popularity of the drink, which by then was being sweetened by the upper class. After a bit of murdering, pillaging and conquering—otherwise known as “exploring”—Cortez took chocolate back to Europe and eventually the sweetened version of it became immensely popular with the upper crust of high society.
And then, in 1819, a Swiss manufacturer invented the first chocolate bar.
Since then, we’ve crammed nearly every sweet imaginable into chocolate bars, while also managing to include a few salty food items. You see, somewhere along the way during chocolate’s journey, a forever-unknown industrious person decided to try taking chocolate back to its roots as a savory food item. And the many results of this endeavor are far more interesting than any candy bar you’ve ever eaten.
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Savor Your Chocolate
Incorporated in the right recipes and in the right quantities, chocolate proves that it doesn’t have to be relegated to the end of the meal. Let chocolate break free from the confines of decadent desserts and allow it to lend its silky complexity to savory preparations. There’s opportunities for chocolate in beef and bean chili; or as part of an espresso rub for ribs; or even a baba ghannouj using the usually deplorable white chocolate. Let’s roll through some of the more interesting savory chocolate dishes from around some of the top recipe sources on the internet.
From Saveur.com, a rack of meaty and fatty pork ribs has a run-in with belly-warming spices like cinnamon, allspice, ginger, and mustard powder. But it’s the inclusion of cocoa powder that delivers a depth of flavor that ribs have been missing for all these years. Also from Saveur, try your culinary hand at a triple chocolate beef and bean chili. Think about it—dark red-brown chili made even more dark and more red-brown with the inclusion of cocoa powder and semisweet chocolate. And on top of that, the recipe calls on you to add a complex bitterness with a chocolate stout beer to complete the chocolate triumvirate. Meat plays deliciously with chocolate, as its bold robustness is the ideal match for chocolate, which delivers layers of depth to the overall flavor.
The fine folks at the Food Network also deliver plenty of ways to make chocolate part of dinner. But perhaps their most interesting suggestion is chocolate fried chicken. The recipe  adds chocolate to the typical buttermilk brine, along with cayenne pepper for an all-around dizzying mix of sweet, savory, spicy, tender and juicy. But chocolate is not confined to brine, as the batter also includes cocoa powder, along with cinnamon, nutmeg and cayenne. The food of the gods, indeed.
Chocolate Reign
There are many savory chocolate recipes out there besides the ones listed in this article. Browse around the Internet and find your favorite. Then do your coworkers a favor and opt to toss your leftover Halloween candy in the trash where it belongs.
Long Island Weekly's Steve Mosco discusses the savory side of chocolate and shares some recipes of dishes that feature chocolate in unexpected ways. There’s the sweet tooth, and then there’s the meat tooth Every year around this time, you stock your home with as much chocolate as possible because you’re absolutely sure that despite all evidence pointing to the contrary, you’re going to have more trick-or-treaters than ever on Halloween.
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