#there is a shit ton wrong with florida - especially with desantis and republicans

[odinsblog]

@stabbysheep

If I may ask, where do you live?

I’ve lived in Floriduh for half of my adult life and I’m an avid beach goer, so I kinda sorta consider myself to be somewhat of a connoisseur of beaches. I’m wondering if maybe you’re stuck on the implied “nearby” part of my tags? We might have different definitions of what a restaurant that’s “nearby” means, but otherwise your statement confuses the hell out of me?

Obviously most, if not all, of the world famous beaches like Clearwater Beach, South Beach and Siesta Beach have places to eat literally within yards (meters if you’re from anywhere else but the US) away from the sand and surf, like maybe cross one street and you’re at the bar - IF they haven’t rented you an overpriced cabana and are bringing food and liquor directly to you on the beach.

But okay, maybe you think of those places as “tourist traps,” so of course they’re going to have restaurants nearby, right? But here in Florida, even the not-so-famous beaches have bars and restaurants close enough to the beaches that you could walk in to the establishment and still be dripping wet from getting out of the water. I’m talking about places like St. Pete Beach, Gulfport Beach, Lido Beach, and even Plymouth Beach in Massachusetts (shout out! to my hommies living in the 508 and 774 - Imma be back).

A beach without a restaurant, burger joint or a bar very close by sounds utterly foreign to me.

The only exception I can think of are beaches located at state parks, or similar type beaches, like maybe Sanibel Island or Fort DeSoto Beach — the draw for beaches like that is, they are supposed to be very secluded and far away from everything. And I dO enjoy visiting those beaches too. But other than that, yeah, our beaches here have been capitalism-ized for the restaurant industry and beachfront condo developers.

LOL, call me a bad anti-capitalist, but it’s actually one of the few things I really enjoy about going to the beach: it’s basically a completely self-contained day/evening out, or a complete date night, or whatever ever else you might want it to be - beach activities, food & drinks (often at 4 and 5-star restaurants), and if you time it just right, a fantastic view to a beautiful sunset or sunrise. Win, win, win. And don’t even get me started with the hotels that have near-Olympic size swimming pools, and the SWIMMING POOLS are within walking distance from the beach??! 🤯 Mannn please.

It’s like, do I get out of the pool and walk a few dozen yards to the beach, or do I get out of the pool and walk over to the bar? It’s feels hella opulent in its overkill, but I dO love tf out of it sometimes.

And the nearly universal mandatory casual dress code (shorts, flip flops or sandals, and a loud ass short sleeved shirt) is just the cherry on top.

Anyway, yeah, it looks damn fine but I’ll save the snacklebox for poolside events, and keep the restaurants & bars for the beaches. But that’s just me. It’s cool if anyone disagrees or whatnot. We all friends here, we aren’t a hive mind, right?

SN: I should stress that beaches can be miles and miles long, so I should point out that what I have described above may or may not always describe the entire beach; there might be parts that are far enough away from the beaten path that might not be as close to restaurants as other parts of the same beach.

[brucewaynehater101]

SPECIAL DEATH MESSAGE:

(offers you a dainty bone china teacup full of earwax)

Republicans have an uncanny taste for the inside of Donald Trump's rectum

Someone genetically engineered the noses off of my space sheep. The whole sniffer bloodline is being executed for smelly crimes. Also appearing on toast, THE FRIED TOMLINSON SPAM EGG CHIPS AND SINGERS!

Upon their second meeting he scolded her for upsetting the Queen of the Artichokes

Insallah, the [genocidal eugenicist] reptile shall be made into air conditioning

In this brutal, breakneck first-person booter, the Anger Foot introduces the ruthless gangs of dystopian cesspit Shit City to a fury of feet and firepower.

(in heavy Hungarian accent) Great bewbies, Honeybun. My lower intestine is full of spam, egg, spam, bacon, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, and spam. My n1pples! (I am dragged offscreen by a Victorian London bobby as Vikings chant loudly)

Does he have foreskeen eyes?

Massive swarms of cicadas devouring our crops, check. Rivers and seas boiling, check. Lots of natural disasters, check. Leprosy rates spiking among Americans who have never even seen an armadillo (a plague of sores and boils), check. (That last one especially so in Florida, I guess God hates DeSantis.) Speaking of which, false prophets, check and double check.

Many used camels be upon you. GETAWAY CAMELS! GETAWAY DATES! ONLY SLIGHTLY USED! GARRYS MOD HAS MADE BRAIN IS FULL OF POOTIS!

(but earwax isn't drinkable :( Is it to look at?)

"Republicans have an uncanny taste for the inside of Donald Trump's rectum." Is that a clever way to say they kiss ass???

Space sheep! Now I'm imagining star patterned sheep 🥺 Sucks they're all being killed off, though :/ Have you seen that one detective show where this guy solves crimes cause he can smell real good? Very curious how he vs the sheep would go

Idk wtf a Tomlinson is, but spam and eggs sound gross :( At least a singer is there? For the toast 🍞🥂

Artichokes are delicious. Would the queen be offended if I ate one in front of them?

"Insallah" is a cool as fuck phrase. I hope God approved of turning a genocidal eugenicist reptile into air conditioning. Fucker deserves it. Might as well get used out of the gross reptile

First-person booter?? I'm guessing "Anger Foot" is the name of the game... Booter, like kicking someone? Which makes sense later with the fury of feet and firepower. Ig Shit City would probably be a horrible place to live (but also fun?? As long as you are strong enough against feet?)

Well... I don't like spam or eggs and baked beans are alright... You seem to very much like them plus bacon if your lower intestines are full of it. Would that be a balanced meal? It seems like a lot of protein

Whelp... Vikings are cool. Wonder what their chanting would sound like. Though cops aren't cool in comparison :/ Bobby is a funny name for 'em, though.

Lots of questions about "foreskeen eyes" Is that foreskin eyes (which... would that make them reptile eyes??) or forseen eyes (fortune telling eyes [fortune eyes is a fantastic song])

Cicadas!!! Their carcasses are scary :( We do have a ton of natural disasters occurring (I feel like that's the wrong term cause they ain't gonna end).

I didn't know much about DeSantis. All I knew is that I can't visit Flordia anymore :/ There's some wild shit online about him, though. On the related topic, makes sense why climate is revolting against him.

Hmm... Who's the false prophets this is addressing? And, what would they need to double check? Perhaps double checking the lies (since they are false)?

Used camels be upon you... Hmm... What would a not used camel be? What makes them used? Is it bad that they are used? It's maybe good that they are used as a getaway (depends on the circumstances)

Dates, on the other hand, do not make good getaways. They are tasty, though

Wait... Are the dates slightly used? Cause I'm good. I will only consume unused dates

Garrys mod??? And the only thing I'm seeing for pootis is a weird looking bird :/