#there is a continuation to this but it will be shared on the 9th bc i fucked up the order of the days in my notes LMAO

[dddrunkderella]

kinktober day 7: monsterfucking, more like monsterCUCKING- [gets hit with thunderbolts]

full view on poipiku!!

(extra rambles under the cut)

so in the process of drawing this i ended up getting really into the idea that clive's idea of recreation during his time with the Bastards is to 'fraternize' with the sanbrequois dragon population

so in this he's essentially hooking up with an old acquaintence LMAO

sorry cid this clive sometimes gets hungry for a different dick (and having more than one...)

[multidimensionalguidance]

SR Chart in-depth Analysis Part 2 🔒

Here’s the continuation and final part of my SR chart analysis and predictions, which has been very fun because its the few moments where I can see myself from a different perspective, and just focus on the information I can decode without any room for judgment.

Taurus 8th house: my sense of security will depend a lot on how much I can rely on indulging in delicacies within my own hidden safe space. Finances are merged or shared within close relationships. Partners resources become my own. Inflexible or hard-headed when it comes to the type of comfort or luxury I expect to enjoy. A big focus in other people’s resources becoming my own somehow. The ruler of this house sits in the 12H, which means that the money I receive or try to keep hidden will be used towards spirituality, foreign settlement, expenditure, bed pleasures, self care, health, work clothes, skincare, and extravagant procedures to enhance my natural beauty, which could be to an almost detrimental or excessive level since Venus is debilitated.

Gemini 9th house: communications in general will be towards philosophy, higher knowledge, luck, feeling blessed, traveling, foreigners, teachers, spiritual guides, etc. It is also likely I will be speaking a foreign language quite often. Lots of short distance traveling to foreigners places. These conversations and type of mindset will influence my finances, bet it due to new perspectives or simply luck allowing me monetize those newly acquired learnings and skills. That would particularly be due to 9H ruler sitting in the 2nd house. I’ve read before that Mercury in the 2nd denotes above average intelligence, so perhaps that will also influence on how I’ll be able to increase my resources.

Cancer 10th house: this year people will perceive me as very nurturing, mother-like, soft, intuitive, and like wife material (particularly bc that asteroid Bried is conj the MC). It is likely that I will be receiving lots of attention because that’s what luminaries do, they put a spotlight, which is career/public image for me. My work environment could be spent in a space that IS or feels like home. There could be discomfort from having matters that are private exposed to the public, so I might have to deal with some of that as well. The ruler of this house sits in the 5H, so I might be doing creative work online, related to children, with romantic partner, in a fun way.

Leo 11th house: my social circle will be full of creatives (artists, leaders, performers, teachers, government workers etc), royal-like people or individuals with a certain amount of influence. My goals, social media image, and gains/income will be focused towards notoriety, fame, child-like joy, romance, appearance, etc. On top of that, the ruler of the house sits in the 2H, so those gains/goals/social media image will also influenced my resources and finances.

Virgo 12th house: with Venus sitting there and it being the debilitation, I’m led to thinking that the possible negative significations of this placement will be experienced in isolation, during my daily night routine or in foreign places. The difficulty with Venus in Virgo is how overly critical and judgy it is towards itself and others. There is a difficulty with fully enjoying the experience of love and beauty because you’re too busy thinking of how things can be better or improved. Now, on the other hand, no one does acts of service and has a deeper awareness of health and beauty than this sign. They give and give happily to those they commit to or love in general. I will probably be enjoying a bit of those sides during this year.

Thank you for reading this far! I’m excited to check this during December and doing a sort of checklist of what I predicted accurately + everything else that will definitely happen without my awareness.

[melancholy-of-nadia]

love u lately #3 (m) | myg/knj/pjm

teaser: love u lately #3 (m) chapter title: #3 - pears​ pairing: yoongi x f. reader, namjoon x f. reader, jimin x f. reader (yoonminjoon x f. reader) rating/genre: m (18+) ; smut ; college/university au , pseudo frat! bts; best friends! yoonminjoon to lovers; summary: you continue your entanglement with yoongi despite jimin's suspicions of him. however, when you end up being in a group project with jimin and having a heart-to-heart moment with Namjoon, you realize there may be more to what your heart may want. warnings: suspicious jimin, brief but word heavy study session bc this is a college au, pining, verbal argument which includes yelling, awkward tension, break up?, jealousy, namjoon and jimin making you have mixed feelings?, a little bit of angst!! notes: s/o to @daegudrama for editing as always for editing! word count: 7.3k drop date: october 9th, 2023, 4:30pm pst cross posted on ao3 here ← #2 | Series Masterlist | #4 → October 10 - Wednesday

Two days have passed since the secret arrangement between you and Yoongi was set in motion.

The atmosphere is charged with unspoken tension, Yoongi's touch lingering a second longer than usual, his neediness veiled under the guise of casual affection.

This subtle transformation extends beyond the private moments you two shared days ago; it starts to seep into your daily life at the house.

Yesterday evening, as you helped Jin prepare taco Tuesday for the group, you felt Yoongi's presence behind you. His fingers brushed against yours as you reached for the spices in the cabinet, sending a jolt of awareness through you. It was as if he couldn't resist being near you, even in the midst of mundane tasks. 

"Need any help with dinner?" he murmurs, his warm breath grazing your ear as he leans in closer. His voice holds a hint of playfulness, but his eyes bore a depth of longing.

You smile, turning to face him, your eyes meeting his dark, intense gaze. "I've got it, but thanks Yoongs." You keep your tone light, aware of the prying eyes of the other housemates.

After dinner, you, Jimin, and Taehyung gather in the living room, opting to binge-watch "The End of the F***ing World." Yoongi's behavior continues to be noticeably different. He suddenly takes a seat next to you on the couch to join the watch party too. His arm casually drapes over the backrest, unconsciously brushing against your shoulders. It's a small gesture, but it sends a shiver down your spine.

Jimin, who sits on the adjacent couch, can't help but notice the subtle touches and glances exchanged between you and Yoongi. His normally cheerful demeanor is marred by a hint of jealousy that he struggles to conceal. He has known you both for years, and this newfound and sudden closeness raises questions he can't ignore.

His suspicions and worries only worsen this morning when he overhears Taehyung talking with Hoseok about how Yoongi has been acting differently since they got home on Saturday. Initially he thinks he's overthinking. If everyone else is starting to notice these patterns too, he must indeed not be overthinking/making things up.

"Hey, Hoseok hyung, have you noticed that Yoongi's been acting weird lately?" Taehyung's voice carries a tone of concern as he leans against the doorframe of Hoseok's room.

Hoseok looks up from his phone, eyebrow raised. 

"Weird how?"

The fluffy haired boy fidgets, his fingers tracing patterns on the doorframe.

 "I don't know, he’s been out of his room more often these last few days…and he’s been less grouchy…” Taehyung pauses before he exclaims his next observation. “He’s also been receiving my hugs without struggling out of my arms!"

Hoseok giggles, gaze softening as he puts his phone down. "I don’t know, Tae. Some of that sounds like usual Yoongi behavior. Maybe something good happened to him lately? I know he’s been working on dropping a SoundCloud mixtape."

"Yeah, but it's been going on for a few days now. There’s the breakfast feast we all walked into on Saturday? Who was that food for when we were all gone except–" Taehyung pauses his words, eyes boring into the older man’s, waiting for him to catch on.

Hoseok's lips quirk into a knowing smile. "Ah, I see what you're getting at. You think Yoongi’s dating someone?"

Taehyung shrugs, a mix of curiosity and concern in his expression. "I think he’s dating HER.” He emphasizes, eyes widening so Hoseok catches the additional hint. “I know him and Honey have been best friends since they were kids...but it would make sense. She’s beautiful.” He scans the area discreetly, trying to make sure no one else is hearing this conversation being spoken. “I thought Jimin liked her too, but he’s always with different people. Irene is the longest relationship he’s had."

Hoseok chuckles, memories of the past resurfacing. "True, true. But we shouldn't jump to conclusions. Let's give Yoongi the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he’s been in a better mood because of his music."

“Funny how Yoongi hyung’s doing better than Namjoon hyung…what even happened while we were gone on Friday.” Taehyung muses, his tone laced with intrigue.

Jimin, who had overheard their conversation while hiding behind the hallway wall, decides to walk toward them and chime in. "I heard you calling me?" he says, a curious lilt in his voice as he steps out.

Hoseok and Taehyung's eyes widen in fear, caught off guard by Jimin's unexpected presence. The room seems to hang in tense silence for a moment as they exchange uneasy glances, their words now exposed to a prying third party who is more than interested in their observations.

Hoseok exchanges a quick, apprehensive glance with Taehyung. The realization that Jimin had overheard their conversation is undeniable, and there is no way to backtrack now.

Jimin, with a faint hint of suspicion in his eyes, takes a step closer. "What were you two talking about?" he asks, his tone carefully neutral.

Taehyung's usually jovial demeanor falters for a moment, but he quickly regains his composure. "Just some house stuff, you know, the usual," he replies with a forced smile.

Hoseok nods in agreement, though his eyes dart nervously between Jimin and Taehyung. "Yeah, nothing important," he adds, his tone shaky.

Jimin, however, is not easily convinced. His instincts tell him there is more to the conversation than they are letting on. "It didn't sound like 'house stuff' to me," he says, a note of determination in his voice.

Taehyung and Hoseok exchange another anxious look. They know they can't keep the truth from Jimin forever, especially with the mounting evidence of Yoongi's unusual behavior.

Finally, Taehyung sighs, relenting as he knows he can't lie to his closest bud in the house. "Okay, Jimin, you got us. We were just talking about how Yoongi's been acting differently lately. I believe he might be dating someone."

Jimin's brows furrow, a mixture of surprise and unease crossing his features. "Dating someone? Yoongi?" he muses aloud, his mind racing to process this confirming his earlier suspicions. It isn't the conclusion he wanted to reach, but it certainly explains the changes he has observed since Saturday. Though from what he heard before he made his existence to the two men known, he doubts that you would be the one dating Yoongi. There’s just no way he’d do that.

Taehyung nods, offering a reassuring smile. "Yeah, but we're not sure. It's just a hunch!"

Hoseok chimes in, "We didn't want to jump to conclusions without more evidence."

Jimin's gaze remains fixed on the two of them, his thoughts whirling. He had suspected something was going on between you and Yoongi with the way he's been behaving around you. A mix of emotions swirl within him, including his growing jealousy he is struggling to suppress.

+++++++++++++++++

On this particular Wednesday, you find yourself in your marketing class alongside Hwasa, Seokjin, and Jimin. The four of you sit clustered together, engaged in a conversation about the marketing team term project that Professor Sui has announced. It consists of a comprehensive 10-page paper and a short yet cohesive presentation that summarizes the main points of the paper.

As you are about to chime in with your idea for the project, Matthew Kim slides into the empty seat at your table, flashing a charismatic smile that has earned him his reputation as a campus party enthusiast. His sudden presence is met with a mixture of surprise and curiosity from your group.

"Hey y’all!" he greets cheerily, leaning back in his chair. "Mind if I hop on this team?"

Seokjin exchanges glances with the rest of the team, gauging their reactions. Hwasa offers a friendly nod, while Jimin seems intrigued but cautious. You, on the other hand, welcome the idea with a genuine smile. "Of course, Matthew! We'd be glad to have you. We're just discussing potential topics for our marketing project."

Matthew's eyes light up with enthusiasm. "Sounds gucci! So, what's the company we're tackling?" He looks over your laptop screens to see what notes you have gathered so far.

You lean forward, confident in your choice. "Well, first I thought about how In-N-Out obviously has a dedicated fan base that swears by their menu items. Also, their menu is pretty simple, focused on fresh ingredients, and the whole 'secret menu' thing creates a sense of exclusivity. Plus, they don't invest heavily in traditional advertising, relying more on word-of-mouth and their loyal customer base. That's pretty uncommon in the fast-food industry."

Suddenly, Jimin chimes in, his peppy voice brimming. "And! Let's not forget their limited presence. They're mostly on the West Coast, which makes their expansion strategy intriguing. We could explore how they maintain such a strong brand in a relatively small area?"

Silence hangs in the air for a few heartbeats, each second stretching into an eternity. Doubt creeps in, and you wonder if pitching In-N-Out is a terrible idea after all. It's undeniably unconventional, and for a moment, you question whether opting for a well-known giant like Disney or McDonald's might have been the safer route. Just as you're on the verge of retracting your proposal, Seokjin, with a glint of excitement in his eyes, lets out a hearty chuckle. "Well, well, I’ve never seen the two of you so eager for a project. In-N-Out it is!"

Your eyes widen in pleasant surprise. You hadn't expected your sunbae to embrace the project topic so readily. A collective laugh ripples through the group, your cheeks flushing with a mix of relief and embarrassment. You turn to look at Jimin, finding warmth and fondness in his gaze.

In moments like these, you remember that Jimin is the one who often champions your spontaneous ideas, acting as the magnet that draws everyone else into your orbit. Like when you both proposed the wild race to lose your virginity before the end of high school, successfully roping Namjoon and Yoongi into your shenanigans. Ironically, it was also like that time you wanted In-N-Out after receiving your disastrous Calculus midterm grade last Spring semester. Jimin had begged Jin to borrow his sleek black Audi RS to take you for a vanilla milkshake and animal-style fries, to which he surprisingly agreed. It ended up with Jungkook, Taehyung, and Jimin cheering you up with your comfort food at 12am. These memories weigh on your conscience, especially now that you have chosen to have a secretive situationship with Yoongi, hiding it from everyone, especially Jimin.

You're brought back to the surface from your dulling thoughts when you hear Hwasa calling out to you to ask when you’ll be free tonight to work on researching information with the team.

"Oh, I don't have any evening classes, so I'm free when–" You pause, a realization dawning as you remember your work-study responsibilities to cover your tuition. "Wait, I was supposed to work in the library this evening, but I'll ask if Soyoon could cover for me." You pull out your phone and click on her contact to text her your request. Soyoon is another friend in your small female friend group that you met through this work-study program. She is typically handling morning shifts on Thursdays, so swapping shifts tonight seems feasible, unless she has plans.

Hwasa nods, her enthusiasm undiminished. "Sure, babes. I'll schedule one of the study rooms in the business building so we can meet up later. Does 7:30 sound good, boys?"

Matthew, Seokjin, and Jimin nod in agreement, ready to commit to the plan. Not long after, Soyoon replies to you with ‘no worries, i got you!’ text with a blushing smile emoji next to it. I guess that settles the group project plans for night, you think to yourself.

As you look around at your friends, you can't shake the feeling of guilt for keeping your situationship with Yoongi hidden. The complexities of your relationships within the group are becoming increasingly tangled, and you wonder how much longer you can keep your secret concealed.

++++++++

The night settles in, casting a soft, dim glow over the campus as you arrive at the business school building just a tad earlier than the agreed-upon time. The hallway outside is mostly deserted, however, there are still some students in night classes and some sitting around and studying along the lit corridor. With a bag of snacks in one hand and your determination in the other, you quietly approach the designated study room Hwasa reserved.

As you push open the door at 7:15, the room is bathed in the muted, warm light of a single desk lamp, and you are surprised to find Jimin already here. He meticulously arranges a selection of drinks on the table, their labels glistening as they catch the light. His eyes light up as you enter, a warm smile spreading across his face.

"Hey," he greets, his voice angelic and inviting. "I thought I'd get here early to help set up. Hope you don't mind."

You return his smile, a sense of gratitude welling up within you. You're not too surprised he also showed up with snacks. "Not at all, Jimin. Thanks for coming early. I brought some snacks too."

Jimin's gaze drifts to the snacks you have placed on the table, and he chuckles. "Great minds do think alike, huh?" he remarks, his eyes crinkling with amusement.

You take a seat next to Jimin, the atmosphere in the room cozy and welcoming. The study room has a serene ambiance, the faint hum of the air conditioning creating a soothing background noise.

"It seems that way," you reply, your heart warmed by the camaraderie between you two.

He gestures to the drinks he has laid out. "I grabbed a few drinks for us. Yerba Mate, water, and some green tea. I remember you like the Bluephoria Yerba Mate." He grabs the can and hands it out to you.

You can't help but be touched by his thoughtfulness. "You have a good memory, Mimi. Thanks for remembering."

He flashes a playful grin. "Of course, how could I ever forget your favorite, Darling?"

As you settle in, his eyes meet yours, and for a moment, the world outside fades away. Jimin has always been known for his exceptional memory when it comes to your favorite snacks. It's a skill he has honed over the years, driven by his desire to make you smile. Even before your current situationship with Yoongi, Jimin has often been the one to make snack runs, returning with an assortment of treats to share with everyone in the house or the dorms, especially during the intense periods of midterms and finals.

Whether it's your favorite Yerba Mate, a bag of kettle-cooked sea salt & vinegar chips, or that one obscure dark chocolate bar you can't resist, Jimin has an uncanny ability to remember the details of your cravings. It's a gesture that hasn't gone unnoticed throughout the time you've known him.

Yoongi, too, has a knack for remembering your snack preferences, although he displays it in his own, quieter way. He might not be as vocal about it as Jimin, but he will often surprise you with your favorite snack tucked away in your bag or on your desk when you least expect it. His actions speak volumes, a subtle way of showing that he cares and pays attention to the little things that make you happy.

In those moments, whether it's Jimin's boisterous enthusiasm or Yoongi's quiet consideration, you feel truly cherished by these two men. Namjoon is a bit different from the two, though.

Not long after, Seokjin, Hwasa, and Matthew start coming into the study room, their faces lighting up with excitement as they see the assortment of snacks presented on the table for their indulgence. The room buzzes with anticipation, and you can't help but chuckle at their reactions.

Seokjin, who has a penchant for indulging in snacks during late-night study sessions, immediately gravitates toward the shrimp chips and reaches for a handful. "Honey, you got these? Ah, you've got the good stuff here I see," he exclaims, a grin forming as he settles into his seat.

Hwasa, equally pleased with the snack selection, joins him, her eyes alight with enthusiasm. "Our Honey sure knows how to make our study session so much better," she declares, her fingers dancing over the bags of chips and cookies.

Matthew also looks pleasantly surprised by the spread. "Wow, you guys really know how to set up a study session. I'm impressed, not gonna lie," he admits, picking out a bag of gummy candies. “I’m gonna make sure Y/N and Jimin are always on my team for group projects for every class I end up with them.” The group bursts out with laughter while you and Jimin look on with satisfaction with your efforts to make everyone feel at home.

With snacks in hand and laptops opened, the group gets down to business. The atmosphere shifts from casual camaraderie to focused determination as you delve into the research on In-N-Out. Your laptop screens illuminate the room as you pull up relevant articles, statistics, and marketing strategies.

"Alright, let's talk about In-N-Out's competitors," Seokjin suggests, leaning back in his chair. "We've got the big players like McDonald's, Burger King, and Wendy's. But what sets In-N-Out apart?"

"Their simple menu and focus on fresh ingredients definitely gives them an edge. Plus, they've maintained a loyal customer base for years." Hwasa chimes in, pulling up some articles from Business Insider.

Jimin adds, "And their annual earnings are impressive too. I’m looking at their earnings report from 2017, they reportedly made over $800 million. Not bad for a regional chain."

Matthew, who is flipping through some notes on his tablet, pipes up, "Okay y’all, but isn't it strange that they don't heavily promote themselves? I was looking this up before they got here and they rely a lot on word-of-mouth."

Jin nods in agreement, his mouth full of chips as he chimes in, "And their refusal to expand too quickly, even when they could, keeps that exclusivity intact. It's like a club that everyone wants to join, but they have to wait in line."

You giggle, nodding in agreement, "Exactly. It's like they're intentionally keeping a sense of exclusivity around their brand… while also lightly promoting it with their In-N-Out T-Shirts and stickers."

As you speak, Jin jots down some notes onto the Google slides, "Let's make sure we highlight these points in the paper. It's all about understanding their unique selling points."

Jimin, who has been intently focused on his own research, lifts his head from his laptop and puts it on your shoulder as if it were the most natural thing in the world. It's a gesture that has happened countless times before during study sessions, but tonight, it feels different, and you can't quite put your finger on why.

"Y/N," Jimin says, his voice soft as he snuggles against your shoulder. "You should look into researching competitor menus and their pricing. That's a critical point."

You glance down at Jimin, his proximity a mix of comfort and unease. It's as though he's seeking solace in your presence, a subtle shift in the dynamics between you two. His eyes meet yours briefly, a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken tension that has been growing since the arrangement with Yoongi began. Maybe this tension has always been there, and it wasn’t until Hwasa opened Pandora’s box that you started to become more conscious and self-aware of these behaviors. Maybe the lack of touch since your last relationship ended as well as the combination of what felt like Namjoon’s betrayal has made you deluded with these thoughts.

As the group continues discussing the PowerPoint structure and the resources they are consulting, you can't help but wonder about Jimin's intimate actions.

++++++

It's around 9:45 when you guys decide to call it a night and head back to your respective homes. Hwasa and Matthew head over in different directions, and you’re left with the two men. You walk alongside Jin and Jimin, who are engaged in a conversation about playing Team Fight Tactics. It feels like the first time in forever that Irene isn't mentioned in conversation, despite Jimin dating her. After noticing his subtle changes in behavior, you can't help but wonder if something might have happened between them too. He seems like he might be getting burnt out from dating a sorority girl, though Irene is far from the first one. You aren't sure why he keeps doing this to himself expecting a different result. However, not wanting to sour the mood, you decide to hold off on asking him about it. Seokjin and Jimin share a grin as they delve into a conversation about Team Fight Tactics.

 "You know, Jimin, I've been practicing my TFT strategy. I'm basically a tactical genius now." Seokjin, with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, leans in to say to the younger.

Jimin chuckles, his competitive spirit ignited. "Oh really, Jin? I'd like to see that. Last time I checked, you were still trying to figure out how to combine items."

The older man waves a dismissive hand. "Minor details, my friend. I've unlocked a secret tactic – I call it the 'Lose First, Win Later' strategy. It's all about keeping the element of surprise."

Jimin raises an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. "Lose first? Isn't the goal to win?"

Seokjin nods sagely. "Ah, but see, when you consistently lose in the early rounds, your opponents underestimate you. Then, when they least expect it, I unleash my secret weapon– the level two Vayne!"

Jimin bursts into laughter. "Level two Vayne? Maybe I’m underestimating you, Kappa Psi Pi President Kim."

Seokjin grins proudly. "You'll see, Jimin. Soon, I'll be climbing the TFT ranks and taking over the leaderboards. Just you wait!"

Their banter continues, filled with laughter and warmth. This feels just like normal, you think to yourself. It feels like before the breakdown you had on Friday and spending the night with Yoongi. It feels like before Namjoon started getting closer with Jihyo through their shared major classes. It feels like before Taehyung convinced Jimin to go on a double date which led him to date Irene. What went wrong? Yoongi’s question from Friday night surfaces again, hidden from the haze of your feelings that night. Are you in love with one of them…or all of them? Or is there something more that you still haven’t realized at this point in time.

You find yourself falling behind, lost in thought as you are about to approach the crosswalk off campus and reach home. The burden of unspoken secrets and shifting dynamics within your group weighs on your mind. You walk at a slower pace, the distance between you and your friends growing.

Noticing your lagging steps, Jimin suddenly stops mid-sentence and turns around, a playful grin on his face. He hurries back toward you and, without missing a beat, links his arm through yours. His touch is warm and familiar, a comforting reminder of the deep connection you share.

"Hey there, slowpoke," Jimin teases, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

You laugh, the tension that had been building within you slowly dissipating. "Sorry, just got lost in thought for a moment."

Seokjin glances back and notices Jimin linking arms together with you. He shakes his head, a fond smile on his face. "You two are still just like kids!" he remarks, his voice carrying a mixture of affection and amusement. Jimin rushes with you across the crosswalk before the crosswalk light countdown reaches 1.

“Gotta make sure my darling doesn’t get lost because she’s tiny!” Jimin and you exchange a knowing glance, the unspoken history between you evident in your eyes. It's a history filled with shared laughter, secrets, and a bond that time and circumstance have failed to break.

You and Jimin walk alongside each other, arm in arm, the night air feeling a bit lighter with each step. The camaraderie between you two is a reassuring presence, a buffer against the uncertainties of your group's dynamics.

As you approach the corner of the street leading to your house, the distant sound of raised voices begins to reach your ears. The voices are filled with emotion, carrying an unmistakable tension and turmoil.

“You're clearly not all in for me so what’s the point of all this?” one voice exclaims, a rawness in the tone that's impossible to ignore.

Jimin furrows his brow, concern etched across his face. He tightens his grip on your arm, pulling you closer as the shouting persists in the distance. You exchange a worried glance, a silent agreement passing between you both to investigate the source of the commotion. Ahead of you, Seokjin decides to take the lead, guiding you and Jimin as you round the corner of the street. What you come upon leaves you both utterly stunned.

Namjoon and Jihyo arguing right outside the front door of the house.

The tension in the air thickens as Jihyo's words hang heavily between them. Namjoon, his voice laced with desperation, tries to salvage the situation.

"No, you've got this all wrong," he pleads, his eyes filled with sincerity. "I like you, Jihyo, a lot more than the words I can verbalize right now. So don't do this."

Jihyo's expression remains hardened, her resolve unyielding. "I don't care what Shakespearean bullshit you want to say," she retorts, her voice trembling with a mix of anger and hurt. "Because I know that what you said while you were drunk on Friday, is what you truly feel."

Seokjin, Jimin and you open the front gate, catching the attention of the two.

Jihyo's words hang in the air, heavy with emotion and finality. The intensity of their argument seems to dissipate as she turns her attention to the arrival of Seokjin, Jimin, and you. Her anger momentarily softens into a weary resignation, and she sighs, her gaze shifting from Namjoon to the three of you. "Looks like we have an audience now, so I'm just gonna go," she says, her voice weary, her eyes flickering briefly in your direction. It's the first time you've seen her beauty up close, and it strikes you how different she appears from her usual calm and collected demeanor. It's as if she shattered into a hundred pieces before your eyes.

With a final glance at Namjoon, Jihyo imparts a parting message, one that holds both concern and a touch of forgiveness. "I'm gonna say this as your friend," she begins, her voice softening, "get your shit sorted out before you end up hurting anyone else. And I'm sorry I had to end it this way, but despite it all, I'm rooting for you. Goodbye Joon."

With those words, Jihyo walks away, leaving Namjoon standing there, a mixture of regret and longing in his eyes. The weight of their argument and its implications lingers in the air, a reminder of the complexities of relationships and the consequences of words spoken in moments of vulnerability.

Seokjin, Jimin, and you exchange a knowing glance, understanding the depth of what just transpired. Namjoon stands there, lost in thought and motionless, as the arguing and Jihyo's departure sinks in. The shadows of regret and turmoil play across his face, leaving him seemingly paralyzed by the emotions swirling within.

Finally, he breaks the silence with a heavy sigh, his voice filled with a mix of exhaustion and uncertainty. "I... I need to go, clear my head or something," he mumbles, his words lacking the usual confidence that characterizes him.

Before anyone can respond, he rushes past Seokjin, slightly pushing him in his haste. The push sets off a chain reaction, and you find yourself being pushed by Jimin in the process. The abruptness of it all leaves you and your friends looking at each other with concern, the tension in the air almost palpable, and excruciating

You decide to let go of Jimin's arm, hand him your backpack, with determination in your eyes as you speak up. "I'm going to go after him," you announce, your voice resolute.

Seokjin furrows his brow, concern etched across his features. "Is that the best thing you can do right now?" he asks, voicing the apprehension that hangs in the air.

Jimin looks down briefly before meeting your gaze with unwavering trust in his eyes. "I think this is something only she can do at this moment," he says, his voice steady. "Namjoon's known her the longest. I think her presence might ease him."

You agree. You’ve been with him each of the times that he was doing unwell or struggling, managing to get him out of his depressive state with your existence. It shouldn’t be any different now. With those words of encouragement from Jimin, you set off after Namjoon, the echoes of Jihyo's parting words still resonating in your mind. 

From inside the house, Yoongi looks out the window with jealousy running through his veins. He balls his left fist and pushes his hair back from frustration. He knows he shouldn’t be feeling this way because you two are still friends. He was a few seconds from considering going out there earlier to prevent Namjoon from fighting with Jihyo, but decided against it. It felt like some sort of betrayal knowing how you felt towards Joon on Friday and how you wanted to see him face the consequences of his actions, but you ended up going after him without a second thought. He is confused on how he should feel about this and whether he made a mistake as he let his feelings get in the way of his actions.

Jungkook approaches the window, his gaze fixed on Yoongi, and then your figure gradually fading into the distance. He sighs softly, a sense of resignation washing over him.

Meanwhile, Seokjin and Jimin decide to head inside, entering the house to find the rest of the boys in a somber mood following the recent events outside. Yoongi, in particular, appears disheartened. He shakes his head and goes to lay down on the couch, lifting his arm to cover his eyes, appearing to sulk. Jin joins him on the couch, taking out his phone to play Maple Story to occupy himself. Jimin places your bag down on the couch and glances over at Yoongi, puzzled by his sudden mood shift. His thoughts briefly wander to the rumored girlfriend that the other guys had been talking about earlier in the day. But why now? A nagging feeling lingers—what if it is actually about you? He contemplates whether or not to broach the subject with elder man.

Just then, Jungkook approaches Jimin, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and inviting him to join him in the kitchen. He mentions that he had prepared perilla oil spicy makguksu earlier that evening and wanted Jimin to taste his new recipe. He agrees and walks over, finding Taehyung eating straight from the pot and playfully scolds him as Jungkook laughs.

Meanwhile, Seokjin glances at Yoongi and offers a sympathetic ear. "If you ever want to talk about what's bothering you," he says quietly, "just know that I'm the trustworthy type. I'll keep my lips sealed, unlike some of the other blabbermouths in this house. You know that, right?"

Yoongi lift his arm away and turns his gaze toward Jin, his internal struggle evident on his face as he contemplates how to respond.

++++++

"Kim Namjoon, wait!" you call out, your voice cutting through the night air. Your heart is pounding as you chase after him, determined to catch up before he disappears into the darkness.

The campus is quiet, with only a few lingering students strolling about. Namjoon continues his brisk pace in the direction of the campus gym, seemingly intent on finding solace in a late-night workout to clear his mind.

Your desperation grows as you realize that he might be slipping away, and you can't bear the thought of letting him face his turmoil alone. You groan in frustration and, fueled by a surge of determination, you rush forward and tackle him from behind, clinging to him like a koala.

Namjoon stumbles in surprise, his eyes widening as he registers your unexpected presence. He tries to shake you off, but you hold on stubbornly, your heart racing.

"We need to talk, seriously," you plead, your voice trembling with urgency. 

Namjoon takes a deep breath, his tense shoulders slowly relaxing as he agrees. "Okay, okay, just please get off, and we can go find a place to talk."

Your grip on him loosens, and you cautiously climb off his back. "You promise this isn't an excuse to run off without me, right?" you ask, a hint of worry and aggression in your voice.

Namjoon lifts his hand, forming it into a pinky promise. "I promise I'm not gonna do that," he reassures you.

With a sigh of relief, you gently climb off his back. Together, you start walking toward the campus soccer field, where the night is quiet and serene. Namjoon takes off his gray hoodie and lays it on the grass before you sit down, offering it as a makeshift cushion to make you more comfortable. As you settle onto the grass, you can't help but steal a glance at Namjoon. He's wearing a black tank top that showcases his well-defined muscles, a stark contrast to the more reserved freshman you once knew. He looks pretty good.

You both sit in silence, the cool night air enveloping you as you give Namjoon the space he needs to open up. You can see the stress in his eyes, the pain of the argument etched on his face.

Finally, Namjoon breaks the silence, his voice heavy with regret. "She broke up with me."

You nod, your sympathy evident as you motion your hands, gesturing to his distraught expression. "I see that," you say bluntly, allowing him to continue at his own pace.

"We were only sleeping with each other for a bit," Namjoon begins, his voice wavering slightly, "but we were thinking about making it more serious." He pauses, collecting his thoughts. "And then I said something Friday night and completely fucked things up for us."

 "What did you say?" 

Namjoon sighs loudly, the memory clearly painful as he rubs his face in frustration. "I can't even remember, I was so drunk. This happened on Friday."

"Friday..." you murmur, your mind racing as you recall the events of that particular evening. Memories start to piece together, especially the growing worries and the sight of Namjoon making out with Jihyo at the Gamma Omega Tau party. It was the night that had led to your emotional breakdown and your impulsive decision to sleep with Yoongi.

Then it hits you—the realization that Namjoon was supposed to be at the house that night because you and Yoongi had gotten "sexiled" and sent to do game night elsewhere. But when you had returned, in your tipsy and aroused state, he was nowhere to be found. Not even hours later, as you and Yoongi got lost in the moment. It was something you had completely forgotten about, but now it seemed crucial.

"Wait," you say slowly, connecting the dots, "Friday night... you were supposed to be at the house that night, right?"

Namjoon's eyes widen as he comprehends the implication of your question. The pieces of the puzzle start to come together, and you both realize that things could have ended disastrously if he had indeed shown up as originally planned. 

"Yeah, but I ended up sleeping on the couch at Jihyo’s place... by myself," he admits, his voice filled with regret. "Chaeyoung and Nayeon wanted to kick me out, but Jihyo was nice enough to let me stay there. I didn't deserve her kindness."

Understanding dawns as the pieces of the puzzle fall into place. "Oh," you say softly, realizing how the series of events had unfolded. You had also forgotten that Jihyo was in the Professional Kappa Psi Pi frat and lived with some of the girls too.

Namjoon continues, his voice laced with self-blame. "And you saw me come back on Saturday morning with Hope, who should've been gone until Sunday. I called him, and he brought me back home out of concern."

You nod, encouraging him to share more.

"So overall, this is just a consequence of my own actions," Namjoon concludes, a heavy sigh escaping his lips. "I can't even be mad at her; she didn't do anything wrong."

The tension of Namjoon's guilt and self-realization fills the quiet night. It's clear that he's grappling with the consequences of his choices and how they've led to the dissolution of his budding relationship with Jihyo. Despite whatever frustration and angst you felt that night, you still empathize with Namjoon and his situation.

You take a moment to choose your words carefully, wanting to offer Namjoon support and guidance in this difficult time. Finally, you speak with a gentle but firm tone.

"Namjoon, we all make mistakes," you word out, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "What's important now is that you've recognized your part in this and that you're willing to learn from it. That's a sign of growth and maturity."

Namjoon looks at you, his expression a mix of gratitude and remorse.

"You can't change the past," you continue, "What’s said has been done, but you can control how you move forward from here. Take this as an opportunity to work on yourself, to become a better person. And remember, it's okay to lean on us for support when you need it."

He nods, and a faint smile tugs at the corners of his lips.

"As for Jihyo," you add, “she may have left, but she did leave you with some insight on what you can do. So listen to that." Namjoon's gaze becomes more determined, and he nods once more, this time with a sense of purpose.

As your words of encouragement hang in the air, he reaches out and gently places a hand on your shoulder, his way of silently thanking you for your support.

But then, to your surprise, he suddenly pulls you towards him, wrapping his arms around you in a tight, warm embrace. It's an unexpected gesture, and you find yourself pressed against his chest, your head nestled against his shoulder. The emotions in that moment are overwhelming. There's a deep sense of intimacy felt in this moment compared to any other hugs you share in the past. The tension that had been building during your conversation seems to melt away, replaced by a profound connection that transcends words.

"I thought you didn't like hugs, Mr. Kim 'I hate being tangled in limbs' Namjoon," you tease gently, trying to break the heaviness of the moment.

Namjoon's voice is dulcet as he replies, "Just this once, I feel like I needed it." He lets out a heavy sigh, his warm breath grazing your neck like a gentle breeze as he utters, "I miss the old days, when we were still kids and didn't have all this drama and shit." You respond with a soft hum, sharing his sentiment. In that moment, you both long for the simplicity of the past, when life wasn't complicated by tangled emotions and the confusing dynamics that had developed among your closest friends. It's times like these when you find yourself wishing for a return to the days when you didn't have to grapple with the complex web of feelings for your guy best friends. And right now, it's Yoongi who has navigating through a sea of emotions and uncertainty. With that damn question he asked you on that night!

“Me too.”

As he holds you close, you can feel the steady rise and fall of his chest with each breath, a reminder of the very real, very human experience you both share. It's a moment of vulnerability and comfort, where your own concerns and secrets seem to momentarily fade into the background.

The night air around you feels cooler, but within the circle of Namjoon's embrace, you find warmth and solace. It's as if, for that brief moment, the world and its complexities cease to exist, leaving only the two of you, bound together by friendship and shared trials.

Eventually, you both pull away, the unspoken connection between you lingering in the air. Namjoon offers a small, appreciative smile, and you return it with one of your own. Namjoon's voice breaks the momentary silence, his words soft and contemplative. "I think we should go back," he suggests, his gaze meeting yours.

You nod in agreement, recognizing that it's time to return to the house, to your friends, and to the challenges and uncertainties that await. Rising to your feet, you brush off any blades of grass clinging to your clothes, and Namjoon retrieves his hoodie from the grass where he had laid it.

Together, you make your way back towards the main campus and the familiar path that leads to your shared home. The night air feels a bit lighter now, as if the weight of the conversation has been partially lifted.

+++

As you lie in bed, struggling to fall asleep amid the whirlwind of thoughts and emotions from the evening, your phone suddenly buzzes with a text message. You groggily reach for it, blinking away the sleep from your eyes.

It's a group chat message called NO JIMIN, and you see that it includes everyone in the house, except Jimin. The topic of conversation catches your attention immediately—it's about Jimin's upcoming birthday on Saturday. Somehow, the date had slipped past your mind in the midst of everything that had been happening. The boys wanted to have a party at the house. It has been awhile since a party was held at the Beta Tau Sigma household. Last time it happened, it was Jungkook’s birthday, a little over a month ago. It was a fairly small party, with nothing too eventful taking place. Well if you don’t count Taehyung and Jimin playing strip poker while getting too wasted. Jin and Yoongi really had to calm them down before they were entirely naked and having their dicks out for everyone to see. About a week after, it was Namjoon’s birthday. Though, he opted for the whole house going to celebrate at Baekjeong with KBBQ and going clubbing after at HARU. He did not want to deal with another party crisis at the house.

As you scroll through the chat, Taehyung emerges as the main organizer of the party, and he's already divvying up responsibilities among the housemates. Your eyes scan the messages, and then your heart skips a beat as you see your name mentioned, followed by the assignment he has given you.

Tae: We need this party for Jimin to be lit! Jin: Taehyung, I've got the food prep covered, so don't you worry about that.

Hoseok: I'll be the official DJ for the night, so get ready for some sick beats!! Beta Tau Sigma is BACK!

Hoseok: I'm bringing Matthew's DJ equipment over too, and we'll have the dance floor bumping!

Jungkook: Tae, I'll help out with the drinks and bartending! I’ve been told i make great drinks. Yoongi: I can handle working the drinks too, but just a heads up, I might be enjoying them a bit too much. Jungkook: LMAO, hyung I think it’s better if you handle something else. Also can someone make sure to buy enough alc options? Namjoon: I can drop by the liquor store on friday Tae: I also need you some of y’all to help clean around the house.

Tae: Hey Honey!

Tae: You and Yoongi are in charge of buying and setting up the decorations for Jimin's birthday party. Sound good?

You: Okie dokie! Yoongi: [thumbs up] Tae: Perfect! This is gonna be a night to remember. Let's give Jimin the best birthday ever! 🎂🎈🎁

You: We got this, guys! Jimin's gonna love it! 🥳🥂

As you send the message, your worries dull for a bit. Maybe this could be a chance for Namjoon to cheer up after the break-up, and make whatever growing tension less awkward. You looked forward to this night with determination, however you feared that what was to come would probably entangle you deeper into chaos with your best friends.

[chthonicgodling]

AND NOW, FINALLY WRAPPING UP, AN ELYSIUM DRAMA UPDATE‼️

Ft., FINALLY ALL TOGETHER!!!!: Tory! EeL! & Maci!!

[you are: one • two • three • four • five • six • seven • eight • nine  • ten • eleven • twelve • here • fourteen (the end!) ]

Hey so, you know like when you’re living in a palace run by a couple in a very loud open relationship, who have graciously given you room and board and camaraderie for almost two decades, even tho generally you usually find them SO annoying and clingy that for the most part you tend to avoid getting wrapped up in their whole thing… up until you discover they happen to be able to scratch a VERY particular itch that you uhh, really don’t openly share with ANYONE—

So you bite the bullet & (gleefully, consensually) surrender a great deal of pride & dignity solely for sexual gratification, only to discover it turns out their irritating clinginess is… unexpectedly tolerable when it’s all directed at you within this new dynamic, in fact the attention is nearly addicting, & throughout this on/off endeavor they are SO earnest in a way you’re really not used to, like— they say what they think & when they want you they tell you &, all in all they are very direct in the way that they love ALL-CONSUMINGLY, until by the time they earnestly ask you to have a baby with them, something that usually no one EVER wants, you suddenly realize that you’ve BEEN consumed by that overwhelming warmth of love, and— that’s actually not so bad, in fact all of this is nearly too good to be true, & actually, you kindave feel like you could get used to this, maybe.

Except historically - things that are perfect never remain. And pregnancy makes you go a little crazy. Which is surely going to make them shove you away faster. So to avoid any inevitable heartbreak, you shove them FIRST and disappear except... then lo and behold they FIND you, they’re not even MAD at you, they’re even LOOKING AT YOU THE SAME (that unbelievably earnestly loving way), and though you were certain you’d fucked something up again the way you usually fuck things up, the way you’ve fucked SO many things up, instead INSTEAD you find yourself falling asleep in their clingy annoying arms & realizing that you, of all people, trust them more than you’ve ever trusted anyone in your life—

...We’ve all been there, right?

UMMM 💞THANKS FOR FOLLOWING ALONG THIS SAGA OF INSANITY💞 (& why am i writing prose in the captions of my art posts. well. i guess!)

as mentioned Elysium Drama Updates will continue since Elysium Drama DOES continue, but this concludes THIS canon arc. I hope this has been as fun for you as it’s been for me AND CONTINUES TO BE…. I’m so normal about them!!! AHH I have nothing else to say except I’m MCFUCKIN EXHAUSTED AND DELIGHTED TO BE MOVING ON (but chewing on all of these pages in delight, mind you).

.....also bonus 9th slide bc 😒😇 fight me.

stay tuned for… whatever’s next 🤪 (in fact just… more of them LOL) I have two more related doodles but only tangentially. well! Soon! as always the momentous [hiatus'd] @fenixethekid is responsible for Tory & all orange bubbles - EeL/green and MACI and her CHAOTIC PINK are all me! [UNHINGES MY JAW] AAAHHHHHHHHHHH- anyway truly thank yall for following along if you have been <33 this does not end here, of course.,,, time for me to take a nap tho. EeL too. sob snif

[sonodaten]

Different anon but could you share more about the Divine Comedy references in PTN please? I've already caught up with the story! You're not the first person I've seen mentioning their similarities which is why I started to read it last week (tho progress is slow 😅)

Yeah, sure! I’ll put this one under a read more bc of the spoilers (up to the end of Ch 8 and some stuff from character profiles) and it’s gonna get a little long. I’m also sorry if you have been waiting for this, I’ve been distracted by the World Cup and general holiday craziness this weekend.

First off, congrats and good luck on the read through! Nothing wrong with taking it slow! If anything, it’s way better. Reading a poem is a lot different than reading a book, and with something as dense as the Divine Comedy it’s way more important to read to understand than it is to read for speed. Knowing what’s going on and what Dante and Virgil are talking about after 20 cantos will serve you better than getting through those cantos after a couple hours or so.

I’ll be sticking to the Inferno, bc as I said in my very first post, most of what I’ve seen and parsed through is referring to the Inferno. That’s not to say there’s no references to Purgatario or Paradiso—there very well could be and I’ve missed them—but one literary hurdle at a time. I will also reiterate from my last post, that some of this will be conjecture due to how little story that is released so far, and the nature of literary interpretation. How I’ve understood the Inferno and how I relate it to PtN’s plot/characters may be different from how you or anyone else does, and that’s great! Differences like that is what makes discussions about the game, theories, and it’s source material interesting.

Now, in the Inferno, Dante travels through Hell with the spirit of Virgil as a guide at the request of Beatrice in an attempt to change his path in life. Dante and Virgil descend through the rings of Hell, meeting individuals that serve as commentary on various point historical figures and events at the time.

In Path to Nowhere, the story we have so far mirrors this pretty well. We have the Chief’s initial awakening and being set on the path towards change (Prologue), the initial foray into danger (SALVA Chaos), the literal descent into the unclaimed crypt (Unclaimed Crypt; complete with ominous message on the wall!), and the Chief’s continued figurative descent after falling out with the MBCC and under the 9th Agency (Keylan Square, The Carnival).

But that’s just a quick overview. I promised this would be long, so let’s get into specifics:

The opening scene of the Inferno has Dante confronted by three animals: a leopard, a lion, and a wolf. These three animals are meant to represent different manners of sin, and chase Dante into darkness. In the Prologue, after Chief awakens the introductory combat situation pits you against Wendy and EMP (Violence and Treachery respectively). It’s also where we meet Virgil and hear of Beatrice’s request, which could be argued are paralleled by Hecate’s (and even Hella’s) guidance of the Chief and Suspect R’s request that Chief follow the clues with the promise that she will be “waiting with answers at the end” (but I’ve gone through so many notebook pages about those three it’s really up in the air for me at this point LMAO so I’ll leave that there for now).

Side bar: that monster we saw in the prologue? Why I’m considering the MBCC is also playing into the Greek Mythology side of Minos. The Minotaur that was being kept in the eponymous Labyrinth as it were. But then what were they sacrificing to it hmmmm…? But that’s another post hahaha

SALVA Chaos (Chapters 1 and 2) follows Dante and Virgil’s journey through Limbo and 2nd Circle. Limbo is part of hell, but souls sent here are not tortured for sins and are mostly just kind of there. Dante and Virgil travel through Limbo to reach a citadel, where they meet other philosophers and poets, like the Chief’s own struggle through Syndicate to reach SALVA. Obviously Syndicate and Limbo aren’t a 1:1 allusion, but not everything between the two will be. Circle 2 is where sinners are punished for lust, and I believe it was changed to Love in-game—though not baselessly! There are actually many places throughout the text that speak to the power of love to inspire sin, both great and small. And in the end, both Dante and the Chief knock tf out. Bless.

Unclaimed Crypt (Chapters 3 and 4) like I said there’s the literal descent into the crypt itself and the ominous message on the wall. Now, the message in the Inferno is seen as Dante is entering hell, and in PtN it’s already by the time we’re pretty far underground and written on the wall in blood, but like I said, not everything’s going to be 1:1 between the two of them. There’s also the presence of the crypt itself and it’s connection to the Inheritance, which could be a reference to the punishment of the 6th circle for heresy (trapped in tombs and set on fire). After all, the arc did end with the crypt exploding in a sea of flames.

Keylan Square (Chapters 5 and 6) the 7th circle of hell is described as containing ruins and shattered stones, similar to the landscape of Keylan Square after the outbreak of the Black Ring. The 7th circle is also where sinners who commit acts of violence are punished, which fits pretty well considering the landscape at the time was supposed to be formed and abide by Zoya’s mind (Zoya is assigned to Violence in the Libram). I also believe the Corpseborne is meant to parallel the Geryon—a monster that’s part human, part scorpion, and part reptile—that is encountered by Dante and Virgil in this circle and they need to pass in order to reach the next.

The Carnival (Chapters 8 and 9), reflect the 8th and 9th circles respectively. The 8th circle of hell punishes sinners guilty of fraud—specifically even a portion for punishing impersonators—and that’s what the Carnival and the revelers within are revealed to be: a massive illusion and Corruptors masquerading as a parade within the Black Ring under Hamel’s power (which in it’s own way is revealed to be a sort of impersonation when the truth about the Corpseborne and Phantom Hamel come to light). The 9th circle of hell is where sinners guilty of treachery are punished, and it’s environment is described as a frozen lake. Similarly, after defeating Phantom Hamel and dissipating BR-0001 the Chief finds Hamel beneath the surface of the frozen lake they first saw her dance, where Hamel traps the Corruptors in her final illusion.

Mmm I know I said it would be long but I didn’t realize it was that long until right now! Wow! And that’s still just glossing over it all. But I don’t wanna spend too much more time sitting on this in case someone is waiting for it, especially since I’ll be going on vacation soon. I hope that answers your question, Anon. This long and hard to scroll through on my phone, so it’s hard to review, but if there’s anything that needs clarification or if you just want more elaboration, please feel free to let me know!

[nicekaylee]

SEPTEMBER-DECEMBER 2023

took a vacation after the show failed to love my life again and stepped away from music 2. somebody moved into my studio so couldnt work on my album 3. went outside a looot more and met new friends. 4. met someone that WAS.... the person i was looking for, full of life and loud and hype and talented and beautiful and a spirit i resonated even deeper bc she also had ADHD. 5. started doing sunday jazz nights 6. made some new KAIYEME music and animations and art. 7. Did a new VICE KAYLEE show in October 9th and actually went amazing and well planned this time. FINALLY. 8. Fell in love or really liked or got into a fake delusional relationship/situationship with that girl. and it ended terribly. was amazing until it wasn't (september-december) we're barely friends and we barely talk now. i still love her unconditionally and i hope she gets better and i hope i get better. She is not the one that makes my life...better sadly, because i don't make hers. and i have issues too. but she does too. (it will drive me insane explaining this) 9. i learned to not be a carpet mat that gets walked on and grew thicker skin. 10. i lost my best friend of 9 years, he blocked me on everything. because i have a problem with over sharing. which i don't really.. i've just been extremely stressed out and it's not pathological. 11. im still not done with my album, i still havent progressed in life. 12. i started to skate and started adventure time for the first time ever. its amazing and skating feels so good. 13. me reymun are stronger friends than ever and will continue to be strong for black color that we still believe in. stanley and endee and are closer too but not as much as me and reymun. 14. had the best day of my whole year for an hour and 30 mins at a bouncy place with reymun and two girls from our past live shows. (december 30th) 15. Dec 31st im suicidal

and i still feel lonely i want to feel gratitidude or thankfullness for what i have. but two close people arent even there for me anymore. im burning on the inside. i've been rageful for the first time in my life like this. i might find faith this next year. i ran out of ideas. and only feeling more pain. and no love. wheres my family. my friends are fucked up because the way i prioritize them is fucked up. i dont feel like anything is real. i dont feel like anythings matters because i keep getting into the same cycle of nothing happening, and everybody gets to move forward in life. And i keep losing MORE in return. no love, no recognition. therapy never happened, they tried to cut me off. no money made. no love, no true bonds. reymun is close but lets keep it work safe.

but honestly im terribly alone and in pain and desperately need help, and love. i want to feel it, please

[penkraft123]

History of Mandala art

If you have come across a painting which is circular and complex in design, most likely it is a Mandala art. It is one of the most ancient art forms created by human beings, primarily having religious symbols, geometric patterns and many other layers of meaning to it. ‘Mandala’ is a Sanskrit term which means a circle.

Different types of mandalas have been found in almost all the religions as well as psychology; among them, Hinduism and Buddhism have the mandala paintings in a majority. Some mandala paintings have been discovered in the Tibetan sketches and writings which date back to the 8th and 9th centuries and in the murals and cloth paintings of religious sanctuaries of the 11th and 12th centuries. Thus, the origin of mandalas is south or south-east Asian.

It was not difficult to get inspiration for drawing mandalas. Nature itself is the biggest inspiration. The concentric circles of mandalas find a resemblance to everything around us if you carefully notice. Right from the cellular structure which has the nucleus at the centre and electrons revolving around it, to the flowers, to the shape of our Earth, stars, solar system and ultimately our universe. Mandalas can signify anything and everything.

In the previous times, the mandalas were primarily made for spiritual purposes, i.e. in meditation, prayers, and healing. These circular drawings represent the ideal form of the Universe in Buddhism. Around 2000 to 2500 years ago, the Buddhist monks travelled via the Silk Road and shared these works of art, these circular drawings to other parts of Asia.

The earliest evidence of such mandala art has been found from the 1st century BC, and then it has also appeared from other countries like China, Tibet, and Japan by the 4th century AD. People began their religious rituals beginning with circles. The five thousand years old man-made sacred mountains called ‘Ziggurats’ were based on concentric circles.

The mandala paintings have a highly rich and meaningful past, the tradition which still continues even today. These wonderful paintings are proving out to be therapeutically beneficial to those who draw them.

Penkraft conducts classes, course, online courses, live courses, workshops, teachers’ training & online teachers’ training in Handwriting Improvement, Calligraphy, Abacus Maths, Vedic Maths, Phonics and various Craft & Artforms — Madhubani, Mandala, Warli, Gond, Lippan Art, Kalighat, Kalamkari, Pichwai, Cheriyal, Kerala Mural, Pattachitra, Tanjore Painting, One Stroke Painting, Decoupage, Image Transfer, Resin Art, Fluid Art, Alcohol Ink Art, Pop Art, Knife Painting, Scandinavian Art, Water Colors, Coffee Painting, Pencil Shading, Resin Art Advanced etc. at pan-India locations. With our mission to inspire, educate, empower & uplift people through our endeavours, we have trained & operationally supported (and continue to support) 1500+ home-makers to become Penkraft Certified Teachers? in various disciplines.

[racingliners]

F1 Re-watch 2022: Round 6 - Spain

To quote Manuel from Fawlty Towers: I know nothing

The only thing I remember from this race is the gifs of Seb and Lewis sharing an umbrella during the national anthem.

So yeah, this could be... fun???

I did not know Lewis and Schumi were the joint most successful winners in Spain. That is a fun fact (Just goat things)

Also Charles is on pole, so I fear I know how this race is ending.

Seb in 16th 😭 (To repeat a previous point, the AMR22 was beautiful, but boy she was a tractor)

Livery watch: Alpine preeeeeeeeetty (blue and pink livery my utter beloved)

Lewis starting on the mediums??????

Fernando taking his sweet, sweet time getting to the grid

[Start/Lap 1]: Another clear turn 1, I’m genuinely shocked

oop didn’t last long Lewis and Kev went into each other

Seb up into 13th though!!!

[Lap 5]: Damn Ocon got past Dan like he was slicing through butter

[Lap 6]: and again on Mick

ahhhhhh Seb on Fernando violence

THAT’S MY BOY!!!

(Insert quote about how Seb and Fernando have always raced each other)

Ugh Fernando got back past it was fun while it lasted

[Lap 7]: Oop Sainz in the gravel

[Lap 9]: Verstappen in the gravel????

Not the gust of wind excuse. *2015 Testing flashbacks*

[Lap 10]: Comms are already talking about team orders. 😬

oof Dan dropping down the top 10 like a stone 😶

[Lap 12]: Russell’s car is overheating???

[Lap 13]: And Verstappen’s DRS isn’t working. 

F1 cars don’t like heat too much do they?

[Lap 14]: Given how the second half of the season went I simply do not trust the face that Leclerc is leading by 14 seconds. I will not be lulled into a false sense of security by Ferrari I know better. I just about survived Seb’s years there 😭

Unrelated: where is my midfield spice???

Livery watch: Alfa Romeo preeeeetty

[Lap 15]: SEB IN P5 STOP THE RACE

(shhh I know he hasn’t stopped yet)

“DRS = Doesn’t Really Stay” Brundle I will give you that one right bc that was funny

This race is playing into Ferrari’s hands and I still don’t trust it

aeuvheugh we’re not in 2002 Crofty

(which reminds me I need to watch some old Schumi races when I have the time)

[Lap 20]: “So Perez is on a one stop” “Blimey!” fguehguehsg

Tell me George is British without telling me he’s British

Stop interrupting Ted, let him speak!!!

[Lap 22]: Yay Seb finally pits... and drops from 8th to 17th 😭

[Lap 24]: Russell on Verstappen violence, some spice at last

Who would win? A multiple F1 race winner or one (1) rear wing flap?

Livery watch: Glossy silver Merc preeeetty

[Lap 26]: uerhaguiehgueh Perez straight up asking for Verstappen to be moved out the way. I would have spat out my tea had I been taking a drink.

“Why won’t you let me by?” Honestly, valid question.

(I’m still laughing)

[Lap 27]: Ah. There it is. The sight and sound of Ferrari betrayal. Number 16 Ferrari goes poof.

Rule 1 of watching F1: Never, ever trust Ferrari

Ted is surprised. I am not.

Ouch, that on-board of the car dying is brutal though.

ANYWAY Seb up into P13 let’s get it

aaaand Lewis got past him 😔 (It’s fine it’s Lewis I’ll allow it)

[Lap 31]: Oop Perez’s turn to get past a car like cutting through butter

(something something the W13 was not a sexy car)

VAL’S IN THIRD?????

I mean it didn’t last very long but DAMN

[Lap 33]: SEB INTO THE TOP 10!!!! STOP THE RACE

I take it it’s bc others pitted, but anyway STOP THE RACE

I feel like this race sums up the 2022 Season. Ferrari start strong, then they fuck up. Red Bull pick up the pieces.

[Lap 39]: BOTTAS IS IN 4TH???? FOURTH?????

I mean damn Val go off but FOURTH?!

Seb gets passed by Lando for 9th

Ferrari engineers looking at their remaining engines like:

PASTOR MALDONADO?!?!

[Lap 43]: aaaaand we’re back with Seb vs Fernando

nvm Seb pitted

Livery watch: metallic green AM preeeetty

continued Seb footage... feels good feels organic

[Lap 47]: Bono sighting!!!

...RBR team orders.

If I speak 😶

(They are 1.7 seconds apart my dudes)

What do you mean this race was six years after 2016???

Christ has it been that long??? The season aged me more than I’d care to admit

[Lap 50]: Bottas is still in P4. Porridge power.

[Lap 57]: Mick: Can I get points??? F1: NO

It’s fine he scores points with Seb in Silverstone 🥺😭

[Lap 58]: Three car fight for 4th? 👀

oh nvm that lasted two corners

Crofty shut up about Seb and Mick crashing in Miami I don’t want to hear about it

[Lap 60]: Oh that was a nice pass from Lewis on Sainz

I would like an emotional support Bono, he sounded so proud 😭

[Lap 64]: Seb in P11. 15 secs behind P10. 😭

DNF risk on the Mercs???? wat

OH cooling issues. shit.

cut to Displeased Toto™️.

[Lap 66/Finish]: A water leak??? a water leak?????

Anyway Verstappen won quelle surprise

Are the Mercs gonna finish though???

They lived!! That was very wild though.

Hmm. It was fine I guess?? Much more interesting than Miami, but the bar was very low. I missed my spicy midfield drama. Russell v Verstappen was fun to watch, and seeing Lewis come through the field as Lewis does was cool. Overall 6 front wings out of 10. Monaco next!

[thegrapeandthefig]

Hera in Samos

Why Samos? Samos is an island located on the coasts of Asia Minor (off the coast of Turkey) which became, over time, one of the most important location of Hera cult. Her sanctuary gained in importance most likely thanks to trade. Despite this, the sanctuary has always been a local one and never became pan-hellenic, like Delphi or Olympia.

However, the cult of Hera on the island seems ot have been introduced by settlers from mainland Greece at the end of Bronze age (probably somewhere around the 10th century BC). The local tradition thus claimed that Hera was born on this island under the lygos (chaste tree, which is sacred to her) and on the bank of the river Imbrasos. An alternative foundation myth says that a wooden sculpture of her was brought there by the Argonauts from Argos. In either case, the early worship of Hera in Samos revolved around this sacred tree. 

The yearly festival in her honour included a ritual binding of her statue with a branch that was cut from the tree. The statue was then carried in a procession to the sea, and would then be washed and clothed with new garnments and jewellery before being brought back to the sanctuary. 

The Heraion Ancient literature on the Heraion is sparce, as sources are lacking and/or contradict eachother, with the exception of Herodotus. However, excavations have given us valuable information. We know that it evolved from an early 9th century BC stone altar that was extended multiple times before becoming a huge temple by the 6th century.

This new/reconstructed temple provided shelter and sleeping space for pilgrims (and possibly supplicants?). Initially, the main sacred way to the temple was through the shoreline, but by the end of the 7th century, a new Sacred Way is built, linking the sanctuary to the city by an overland route (this wasn't possible before because of the river and marshes surrounding the temple). As the popularity of the temple grew, the need for more buildings grew as well and the Heraion became a temple complex rather than an isolated sanctuary.

Impressive dedications One of the reasons why extension became necessary was to store the offerings and votice made by the pilgrims, some of which could be costly and luxurious. The amount of loom weights found in one of the building also indicates that there was a building reserved to the making of the garments of Hera. By the 6th century, luxurious donations and offerings start being made to the temple.

For example, a man called Cheramyes dedicated in 560BC three marbles figures of women and a kouros (statue of a young man) to Hera. Not too long after, a sculptor dedicated a marble group of 6 figures representing a family portrait of a father, mother and four children (3 daughters and a son). They were placed on the side of the Sacred Way with inscriptions to give their names. Dedications fo statues continued during the 5th century with a group of three bronzes depicting Zeus, Herakles and Athena made by the sculptor Myron. However, political uncertainty made those types of dedications less popular than they once were.

Lastly, one of the most extra offerings was a whole boat, which was set up as a votive next to the altar. I will be coming back on the importance of boats in her cult some time this month.

Diverse offerings The diversity of the offerings found during the excavations is a witness to the fact that many travellers stopped by Samos, probably for trade but also for pilgrimage. Amongst the most surprising offerings that have been found were a fragmented crocodile skull and an antilope skull. Both animals couldn't have survived in Samos, even captive, so it is most likely someone brought those heads back from Egypt and dedicated them.

Many terracotta pomegranates and terracotta or ivory poppy pods have been found in the Heraion, as well as a terracotta pinecone. This pattern is of importance on a symbolic level, as all of those share the common trait of bearing seeds. This is a good indicator of Hera's concern with fertility. Further excavations (and a lot of luck!) have confirmed that there was indeed plant remains of pomegranate and poppy seeds and pinecones on the site, which indicates that those were also offered alongside replicas. It seems that none of those were growing naturally on this spot, confirming that they were brought to the sanctuary as votives.

Humbler votives include statuettes of limestone, wood or terracotta as well as wooden bowls, plates (they perhaps held fruits or other perishable items). Were also found uncommon items such as pieces of corals, a piece of stalactite or chucks of rock crystals. _________

Further reading:  Marinatos N., Hagg R., Greek Sanctuaries, new approaches, 1993 Pedley J., Sanctuaries and the Sacred in the Ancient Greek World, 2005 de La Genière J., Héra. Images, espaces, cultes, 1993 (republished 2019)

[aubreyprc]

the response to my post on friday about the 1800 au i am a puddle on the floor actually 💓💞💖💘💖💞 below the cut is more info in case some are not ? interested hehe.

so . in case you did not know. there is a bridgerton based album coming out on ? the 9th september and there is a song on there called ‘burn for you’ that was stuck in my head for the first round of lockdowns and so. that is what i called it . lol.

the challenge was ? so hard i ended up just name generator-ing (is that a word) everyone (apart from emily and hotch obvs) and just chose at random a character and their character in this i basically? yknow what who cares it was all at random and let me just say it is the. craziest and funniest shit ever fr😭 strauss being chosen at random to be the ‘queen’ ( i use the term loosely. they’re barley in it apart from when it’s needed for the plot lol ) made me laugh so hard i cried. it was amazing. and then clyde getting chosen as the grown son was such the cherry on the cake. i was in pieces. I really do recommend this challenge to everyone. it’s fucking hilarious. then of course - elizabeth and strauss needed to be related so that emily was titled because . 1800 was some mad shit bro. you had to have a title to get with a title. yknow ? lol yes anyway if u want more character / ship info let me know i’m happy to share it besties

what else. erm . oh yes. so . the trope is simply friends - enemies - lovers. and it was rlly fun. i had. a blast.

ok so ? if you want a snippet i will leave one here. it’s just a small one from chapter 1 - which by the way, really ran away from me. It’s the longest one of the whole 7, but ? oh hell. here u go lol (also am i at work again bc this is ? scary? yes i am what about it i’ll see u all when i get home love you besties bye 💞💖)

-

“A ruse..” he grins, his eyes playful as he looks at her.

“You cannot be serious.” she laughs, he nods with a smirk,

“What better way to displease our families than to have them believe we are courting? Your mother will believe you’re marrying up, and drop the Ian Doyle idea, and my Uncle will stop badgering me about marrying and continuing the family name.” he says. She stares at him with an agape mouth, laughing.

“And what about when the season comes to an end and we are not married nor have any intention to? Do you expect our families to allow that?”

[pawjamas]

hey..i’ve been back from my stay at the residential facility for several days now and A lot happened, which i’m putting under a a readmore bc it’s potentially triggering (warning for mentions of s*xual abuse/gasl*ghting/etc) my life is basically being uprooted, so much happened in the month of June and is currently still happening, which i’ll explain below

i was admitted to the residential facility on June 9th, it seemed super promising, there was an abundance of 4-5 star reviews from patients online. my friend who currently is working in the mental health field researched about the facility and also confirmed that it seemed a lot better than most places are. the first day was kind of rough and i knew getting adjusted would be difficult but could never have expected what happened the following several days to happen. i made friends pretty quickly, my roommate on the first day there was very kind to me, she told me if i ever needed someone to talk to that she’d be there for me, we also shared the fact we were both nonbinary/just a lot of things we had in common so it was comforting to know her on the first day there.

i spoke to my psychiatrist the next day who told me i could get off “close observations” which is why i was in the room i was, the label is basically something you get put on if you’re at risk for s*lf h*rm/etc and need a staff member w/ you at all times. so since i was taken off of that i was switched to a different room with a different roommate. she was a 60 yr old woman who was in the other program offered at the facility (mine was mental health related and hers was for substance abuse/addiction) i didn’t feel too comfortable around her the first night, she complained about every single thing, she never participated in the groups offered at the facility, she told me over and over again how much she hated being here. the next few days were a blur and are still very fuzzy, my mind is still keeping all the memories locked away which has happened to me many times before w/ trauma where everything’s vague and not fully there.

basically, over the course i was roommates w/ this woman she groomed me and manipulated me into doing anything she wanted me to do for her, she physically/s*xually assaulted me multiple times, and caused my mental health to plummet even further than i thought was possible. i eventually did get to switch rooms, and i only recalled (again, vaguely) what happened those nights about a week later and reported it to the staff where half of them treated it like a joke. i went to the hospital the night i reported everything to get examined and ended up calling my mom on my friend’s phone (she drove to the hospital and stayed w/ me the whole time) and my mom was probably the worse to take my trauma/situation out of anyone. she told me i should’ve spoken up sooner, asked why i didn’t defend myself from this woman, basically the whole phone call was her blaming me for not doing anything about my assault. when i hung up my friend even told me that what she said wasn’t okay, and was victim-blaming.

i left the hospital and got back to the facility around 1:00 am, and the following days i spent there i was continuously getting worse because being in the environment my trauma had happened was preventing me from healing, plus i literally had to be in the same rooms as the person who had assaulted me and seeing her was extremely triggering. she continuously would call me crazy and delusional and that i made the entire thing up, i had difficulty telling what was real and what was not because of how bad i was treated by her and the staff. i’m thankful i met some really kind patients there that became my friends, they helped me the most out of anyone there. at one point a nurse had pulled me into a room and told me how i should never have spoken up about my abuse, how i should consider how it makes my abuser feel, and stop talking to the friends i made about it. but i’m glad i had people who would actually listen.

i mentioned it once but again, my mom was probably the worst person to talk to when all this was happening, at one point one evening when phones were available i called her and told her i needed to leave, i wanted to come home because this all of this was affecting me so badly, and she screamed over and over that i can’t come home and i have to stay, that it’s too bad that happened but continuing to do the program was more important. at that point i broke down and cried, begging her to let me come home and she screamed repeatedly for me to shut up and then hung up on me.

after that evening i knew that i wouldn’t be taking any shit from her any longer, i called my friend who lived nearby about her the following day or so, asked if i could stay with her at her apartment, which didn’t end up happening because we both worried my mom being as spiteful as she is would take legal action if i did leave w/ my friend instead of my mom. i ended up talking to a couple of the friends i made there that i was having bad intrusive thoughts, and that evening i was baker acted (involuntarily hospitalized) and transferred to another facility, which could’ve been because of the staff or me being reported for the thoughts i was having, but regardless i was away from my abuser and didn’t have to see her again.

the hospital i stayed at was...a lot worse than the other place, i barely got to speak to the psychiatrist/therapist during my entire time there, people would joke about how little time you got w/ them. they ended up keeping me there longer than the required 72 hrs, which i asked multiple people why and never got an answer, at one point my mom wanted to make sure i was sent back to the residential facility of which i had to explain would be detrimental to me and my health, but as usual when she had her mind set on something she won’t listen to reason or anyone who explains other (more beneficial) options.

i ended up calling my friend that lived back in the town i live in, told her the whole story and what’s been going on, and ultimately asked if i could move in with her because her and her family had already offered to let me. she was more than happy to have me move in, so that’s what i ended up planning on doing when i got discharged, was have her pick me up instead of my mom. and i called my mom to tell her that i’d be moving out, all the reasons why it’d be beneficial to us both, she took it horribly and told me if my friend picks me up i can never ever come home again and that i’m kicked out. i told her that’s fine, even though it hurt so badly when she said it.

finally, the following monday i was discharged, my friend from back home picked me up along w/ her husband, and we made sure to get all my things from the residential facility (my clothes/shampoo/makeup/etc) before heading back to her house, which was about an hour and a half drive home.

so now i’m staying w/ her, i still feel out of place and disoriented and uncomfortable but her and her family have been very welcoming. i’m trying to get all my stuff from my mom’s but it’s been a huge struggle to get anything from her because she loves to overcomplicate anything and then make it seem as if it’s all your doing and she’s the biggest, kindest saint ever to grace your life. my friends and i all think she has undiagnosed/untreated bipolar, and i definitely think she at least needs therapy and meds too but she doesn’t believe in either for herself. i just want my stuff back, and i do miss my room a lot and jazzy but there’s no way i’m getting either back, i’m also worried how my mom is treating jazzy because she hates him and i’ve witnessed first-hand what she’s done to him before.

i might post my p*ypal / v*nmo (censoring bc i think tumblr is weird abt posts that have these keywords or smth) because i don’t have any income rn...thank you if you read all this lmao i still didn’t even cover half of the other stuff i went through at the place i was baker acted but essentially my life has been turned upside down and i’m having to figure out how to keep going despite it all

[okskz]

Goodbye For Now.

Mia + Stray Kids

after shooting their music video elsy takes mia to the dorms to get some of her belongings to take to her apartment, causing the boys to get slightly upset.

this is a part two of basically from elsy’s post bc I wanted to write about mia leaving the dorms, so here y’all go and enjoy! please feel free to leave some feedback because it is always appreciated!

[9th Member of Stray Kids]

“Do you want me to come in with you?”

Mia shook her head at Elsy. “No, but if you want to that’s fine. I just don’t want you to be uncomfortable with you know-“

Elsy got Mia’s point and gave her a small smile. “It’s okay. I’ll stay right here, but if you do need help, let me know.”

Mia smiled before entering the dorm. She took a deep breath as she walked in. The girl felt bad that she was leaving, but she just couldn’t bring herself to want to stay there. At least for a couple days to clear her mind. She knew staying there any longer wouldn’t help her get over her break up, especially seeing Changbin everyday.

She still felt broken inside and every time Mia would see Changbin, it only broke her even more. He was the love of her life after all.

“Hey, you.” Jisung smiled when noticing Mia walk in. “How was the video shoot?”

“Oh, it went very well. I can’t wait to see the finish product, and of course I can’t wait for you guys to see it too.”

“That’s great!” He exclaimed. When looking down at Mia, he noticed something was off with her. That, and he also felt like she needed to tell him something. “You doing okay?” He carefully asked. Even though she didn’t tell him, Jisung figured something happened between her and Changbin.

“Yeah.” She quickly nodded. “But I’m only here to pack up a few things then leave.”

“Pack up a few things?” Jisung furrowed his eyebrows. “Where are you going?” He quickly followed Mia into her room.

Mia sighed, taking out a duffel bag. “I’m going to be staying at Elsy’s for a couple of days. Or when I feel like coming back.”

“I just can’t be here right now.” Mia tried her hardest not to break down again as she thought of Changbin. She was thankful enough he wasn’t at the dorms for a moment.

Jisung could hear how upset Mia sounded, so carefully he asked. “Is this because of Changbin?”

The girl bit the inside of her mouth as she nodded. “Yeah. You probably already figured it out but we broke up.”

“I knew something was wrong but I didn’t know it was that. I’m sorry, Mia.”

Mia shook her head. “It’s okay. But it’s the reason why I just can’t be here. We share the same room and I have to see him everyday, so it’s better if I just go away from a few days.”

“Aw, Mia. I don’t want you to go.” Jisung whined. He engulfed her into a tight hug, swaying her. Mia felt emotional. She knew she was going to be sad not seeing the others everyday, she knew she was going to miss them.

“I’ll try to not be gone for too long, I promise.” She softly smiled at him. “I’m going to miss you guys.”

“Miss you?” Felix questioned. “Where are you going?”

Before Mia could answer him, Chan had walked in right behind him. “Um, why is Elsy outside our dorm?”

“She’s waiting for me.” Mia simply said.

Chan wasn’t as mad as he was the day the rumors came out, so the two were slowly talking to each other again.

“Why?” He asked. Then he noticed Mia’s duffel bag, along with her clothes. “Are you packing? Why are you packing?”

“I’m going to stay at Elsy’s.” Mia said.

Felix and Chan’s eyes grew wide. “Is this because I was a bit harsh on you that day? If so, I’m really sorry, Mia-“

“No.” Mia cut him off. “It’s not because of that, plus you don’t have to worry about us anymore. We’re not together.”

“Which is why I’m leaving.”

The two boys became silent. They finally knew why Mia was off for the week and why she suddenly became so silent around all of them. She was heartbroken.

“O-oh.” Chan said, not knowing what else to really tell Mia. “But do you really have to go? You can stay in another room, or-“

“No, Chan. I don’t have to go but I want to.”

Felix frowned, but still pulled Mia into a tight hug. “I don’t know much about break ups but if you think this is the right thing to do then go for it.”

Mia smiled. “And it’s not like I won’t be away, you’ll still see me at the music shows to perform.”

“Oh that’s right.” Jisung laughed. “But what about Flash? Are you taking him?”

“No. Take good care of him.” Mia laughed.

After Mia finished up packing a few extra things, she swung her duffel bag over her shoulder. “Well I should get going, I don’t want to keep Elsy waiting.”

She looked at each of her members. “Goodbye for now.”

Jisung and Felix faked cry as the hugged Mia, walking her back to the front door. Chan stayed a bit behind, not really wanting to see Elsy again. He did smile at Mia, and told her goodbye. “If you need anything, let us know please.” He said.

“I will.” Mia nodded.

Saying their final goodbyes with each other, Mia stepped out of the dorm, turning to face Elsy. “All done, we can get going.”

“Perfect. Let’s go.”

The two made it down the building and right when they were almost to the doors, Changbin had walked in and next to him was Minho. Mia and Changbin briefly made eye contact before Changbin looked down at Mia’s duffel bag. He slightly furrrowed his eyebrows, confused as to why she had that in hand.

When Minho saw the bag, he was quick to question her. “Hey, Mia. Where are you going?”

“Staying at Elsy’s for a couple of days, don’t miss me too much okay?” Mia chuckled a little. From the corner of her eye, she noticed the way Changbin was staring at her, taken back from her response.

The two girls didn’t let Minho say anything else as they continued to walk out the building.

But before Mia walked right out, she took a small glance back at Changbin, who was looking at her with sad eyes.

[nwbeerguide]

Back in 2022, the Great Canadian Beer Festival resumes in-person festivities September 9th & 10th.

Press Release

We’re Back!

The Great Canadian Beer Festival (GCBF) will return to Royal Athletic Park in Victoria, BC, on Friday, September 9 and Saturday, September 10, 2022. This year’s festival is the 28th annual GCBF — returning after 2 years due to the pandemic — and is the second under the new management of the Victoria Beer Society following the handover from the original founders who retired in 2018.

“We are so excited to be back this year after two years away, and look forward to continuing to provide a great experience for craft beer lovers at Canada’s longest running craft beer festival,” says Glen Stusek, co-founder and director of the Victoria Beer Society. “The lineup of breweries and beers will be better than ever, including many coming from elsewhere in Canada.”

Up to 4,500 people are expected to attend this celebration of craft beer each day. This year’s festival will feature a diverse range of more than 50 craft breweries from British Columbia along with local cideries and food trucks. As was done in 2019, an expanded array of breweries from across Canada will also be joining the field of Royal Athletic Park. Expect the line-up to be announced in late June.

Discounted Tickets for current Victoria Beer Society members only will go on sale on Friday, June 10th. VBS members can purchase tickets before everyone else and receive a 25% discount on Single Day Friday & Saturday Tickets. Ticket sales for the general public begins Friday, June 20th, including both Single Day Tickets along with Friday & Saturday Weekend Passes.

Discounted Tickets (for Victoria Beer Society Members only)

On Sale Friday, June 10th at 10am at victoriabeersociety.com/gcbf

Friday September 9 - Single Day Ticket

$35.00 + Taxes & Fees (25% discount)

Saturday September 10 - Single Day Ticket

$35.00 + Taxes & Fees (25% discount)

General Public Tickets

On Sale Friday, June 20th at 10am at victoriabeersociety.com/gcbf

Friday Single Day Ticket

$45.00 + Taxes & Fees

Saturday Single Day Ticket

$45.00 + Taxes & Fees

Friday & Saturday Weekend Pass

$80.00 + Taxes & Fees

ABOUT THE VICTORIA BEER SOCIETY

With a focus on quality over quantity, the Victoria Beer Society is a membership-driven community of like-minded individuals who share a common passion for BC craft beer.

We believe the consumer wants not only choice, but also the opportunity to learn about what they consume.

As a card-carrying member of The Victoria Beer Society, members benefit from discounts on our year-round events schedule, merchandise and exclusive access to member only events. What’s more, they are showing their support for diverse craft beer selection and education.

from Northwest Beer Guide - News - The Northwest Beer Guide https://bit.ly/3FJ68Gc

[heleneplays]

BLOG ASKS

I forgot to answer, but thank you to @ravenclaw-craftsgirl, @annabelle-tanaka-official for the tag!

Keeping it short HERE with the handy read more bc my answers will be long <3

1. why did you choose your url?

Honestly, heleneplays-- it's pretty self explanatory that this was gonna be a gaming blog, dedicated to whatever I was playing... which was HPHM at the time.

HOWEVER as u can see, the focus shifted to my comfort milfs characters and my own player characters,,, who are extensions of me, if not a direct self-insert

so here's to my clownery for games and the characters and/or plot that hook me to them

2. any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

yes but no thank <3

well

u may percieve, just this once.

THIS is a sideblog. my main is @h-doodles

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

I'm celebrating my 9th year of being in this hellsite on September 21st.

4. do you have a queue tag?

yes but i forget to use them usually,,,

it's tagged #queue or a variation of, but i'm small and lazy bc I scroll on my phone and tumblr labs' quick queue function is on </3

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

this blog was for the good ole HPHM, but also to actually to simp for Patricia Rakepick on the side, as it was only Y3 back then and I am but a small, hapless lesbian for she

also I was. ig tired of having everything under my main, untagged, unfiltered; so here I am with a very handy sideblog

6. why did you choose your icon?

Right now it's Helene Spillane in with a boquet of sunflowers, and I picked bc this is my OC!!! and I want her to be displayed!!!

7. why did you choose your header?

It was time for a change

(dionysus!helene i love u sweetie but i'm in love with maría just stealing me rudely for a dance)

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

lemme check......

oh wow. i expected it was my shitpost on tall vampire mommy but apparently it's the most regrettable ship i ever considered making.

9. how many mutuals do you have?

I counted 51 in here, and 55 in my main, so in the range of 50-60 since some share between them.

10. how many followers do you have?

Here? around 340, already excluding the pornbots our lord and savior can't seem to flag properly.

11. how many people do you follow?

250

I used to follow over 500 something but most were inactive and I went through them with a paper shredder, but after like. I went through like 3 hellsite unfollow glitches by then.

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

enough.

14. did you have a fight/argument with a blog once?

It doesn't shame me to admit that yeah, I have. Back on my old tumblr tho. Here? Well. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this post”?

I kin with the message, but honestly sometimes i'm conflicted bc I already go thru so much so. yea. personal prefs if and when i'll reblog such posts

16. do you like tag games?

Sure!

But in long posts? Good luck having me continue!

17. do you like ask games?

sometimes, they're good to personalize the traits and characteristics of my OC, but also gives like. a template if I run art ask requests.

I get fatigued easily tho, so that's why some asks are just lounging on the edge of my askbox

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh they're really, really, very good artists so im gonna assume @helgship, @lgvalenzuela, @rymushu, @astrejlau are! also @haniiebeedraws and @jayrart and @kyril-but-magical and @slytherincursebreaker as well, based on engagement <3

writers as well, esp one (1) James Shaw who I am too shy and baby to tag

@annabelle-tanaka-official, @dat-silvers-girl, @weasley-adoptee, @carewyncromwell definitely, if based on the amount of traffic I see on their asks and tags.

19. do you have a tumblr crush on a mutual?

no, but i do admire some of my mutual's themes on PC

also god, what even is a tumblr crush if not a crush?

No tags for future because i'm p sure most my tag game mutuals already answered this, but go ahead and steal if you want!

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

Vol. CXII

It was a love story from the very beginning.

The Righteous Father

(14x05/15x06)

Hello my beloveds! Another meta from Healing!Dean season 14. This is a summary from my original metas from season 14, so I hope I can convey all the concepts for you.

I will talk mostly about Dean's daddy issues and how he will be able to break free about it as he accepts his love for Castiel.

You can check the metas from these two episode following these links: X, X, X, X, X.

Sharing Daddy Issues

"And this episode Logic Nightmares, was about fears... Did you see the woman trying to open the basement door... Darker than night, to see what was in there... In that dark and tenebrous place, and then she was scared him by that "vampire"? And she fell of fear... Well very symbolic bc... imagine Dean trying to open his most darkest room... His lost repressed feeling... But when he tries... He's attacked by his own fears... And he fails Everytime..."

I wrote this in one of my metas. That episode had Dean Winchester saying "Let it go... Like Elsa." It's related to MOVE ON. A topic that will be explored in season 15 with Dean and Castiel after their break up.

'Logic Nightmares' was about fears but also about daddy issues.

The fact that Sasha went to a dark room and found a monster hidden there, is a foreshadow for AUMichael hidden inside of Dean after 14x10 and also, AUMichael spying them though Dean Winchester's eyes. (That's why the reaction of the d'jin in this episode.)

The dialogue between Sasha and Dean in which Sasha were mirroring Dean was very meaningful:

SASHA: My dad wasn't the best person. He was gone all the time working. For us, he said (...)

DEAN: I'm sorry.

SASHA: Mm. That's what everyone says. Except him. Never said it. You want to know what the most ridiculous part is? I worshipped him when I was a kid.

This is Dean talking my friends from the very beginning. His view about hai dad, a man that tried to do his best, but even so, filled with trauma to his son's. And deep inside he was waiting for an apology from John.

And also...

Gif set credit @itsokaysammy

Dean's baggage is full of GUILT, REGRETS and TRAUMA. And the only one person we saw getting inside that baggage/backpack was Castiel in episode 13x20.

Also, the topic of MOVE ON, will be explored in season 15 after Dean and Castiel's break up.

This episode was full of recalling to John Winchester. It worked as a foreshadow of his next appearence in episode 14x13. The episode in which Sam and Dean will be able to forgive their father and heal.

We saw statues of Saint Mary and Saint Joseph in the crypt representing Mary and John Winchester.

And a blatant John Winchester mirror in Bobby...

Okay, let's jump now to episode 14x06... And how it was foreshadowing Dean's choice in episode 14x13.

Dean will choose Castiel

Harper was a Dean mirror, not just because the whole visual elements you can find in the colors of her outfits (she starts wearing red: toxic Dean and ends up wearing green: healing!Dean). But because her relationship with the place where she lived and her toxic bond with the zombie boyfriend.

I realized this episode had a lot of fables references on the wall. That's because we are seeing Dean learning the lesson of his life. Episode 14x04 was about fighting against fears and 14x05 about daddy issues. This episode is about making the right decision and choose your true love.

This was very important to understand episode 14x13 in which Dean decides between his Father, his past and his present family and Castiel. Of course he picked up Cas.

But, then the monster/toxic masculinity boyfriend came back...

"Once in the library what happened was symbolic too, bc Harper OPENED THE DOOR TO HIS TOXIC PAST AND THIS ZOMBIE GAVE HER THE BOOK AGAIN! I MEAN!! This is Dean coming back all over again to this big issue, embracing him, not letting go. This toxic idea of what a man should be, this toxic idea about NOT TALKING OF THE L WORD AND NOT FEELING IT FOR A MAN!"

Another important book was this one...

That book talking about laces (bond, profound Bond) and lances (Dean stabbing Castiel in the barn, love at first stab).

The symbolism here is huge and talks about Dean's inner fight.

From this episode I elqboretaed what I thought was THE MOVES and THE TALK. Because Jack was the innocent one here trying to understand about love.

The moves were related with Dean and CAS being glued and the talk is the one we were waiting for, it came as Dean's prayer in Purgatory 2.0 and Castiel's love confession (as a response to that prayer) in episode 15x18.

First of all, remember the place where Dean and Jack arrived for info. There was full of cocks (second meaning). Also two cocks facing each other to both side of Dean's head (AUMichael against Castiel fighting for Dean 🤣).

And do you remember that funny dialogue between the waitress and Dean and Jack.

JACK - What's courting?

DEAN - Hey, it's what you do before you start dating.

JACK - and that's the thing you do before the sex. (Dean and waitress both look at him oddly)

WAITRESS - Sometimes you just have the sex. (and grins)

DEAN - Okay, that's...Who is Harper Sayles?

That's very cute from Dean and Jack. Because both of them are innocent. Innocent love. Because Dean is not the man that hooks up with any waitress anymore. He even turned away the Cock's tail. Like he rejecting the idea. He is so in love with CAS. Jack and Dean's talk will continue when Jack asks him about Harper being in love with the nougat boy, and googly eyes. (Related to Dean and Cas almost continued eye fucking.) And then the last scene....

Gif credit @mishalocked

This scene was a blatant DEAN IS TALKING ABOUT CAS. DEAN SPEAKS WITH AUTHORITY ABOUT LOVE AND HE EVEN USES THE L WORD HERE. Dean is accepting his romantic love for the angel.

Harper's room was showing a little of Dean's innocent idea about love too. With all the stuffed animals in his room and the big green word AMORE live in Italian.

Another important foreshadow was Harper (this time dressed in green) writing a live letter to Jack, his true love while a love song was playing.

In retrospective, even when I. The letter Harper was chosing Jack over her toxicity, the song playing was a foreshadow of 15x18. I wrote this...

Sobbing, I think I was right...

To Conclude:

These two episode talked about daddy issues and Dean's inner fight that will end with Dean chosing Castiel and his present life against his toxicity and past.

It was full of foreshafows from season 15.

I hope you liked this summaries. If you wanna read more about these two episodes, please check the links at the beginning of this meta.

Tagging @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @authorsararayne @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73 @justmeand-myinsight @idontwantpeopletoknowmyname @teddybeardoctor @pepevons @helevetica @dizzypinwheel @horsez2 @qanelyytha

@destielle @spnsmile @shippsblog @robot-feels @superlock-in-the-tardis @superduckbatrebel @belacoded @madronasky @anon-non2 @cea1996 @lisafu02 @asphodelesauvage @deancasgirl777

If you wanna be added or removed from this list just let me know.

If you wanna read the previous metas from season 14 here you have the links...

Vol. CIX, CX, CXI.

Buenos Aires, May 9th 2021 2:46 PM

[emelinecormier]

THE BASICS

Name: Emeline Sofía Cormier.

Gender: cis Female, She/Her.

Occupation: Executive and owner of Amélie's.

Age: Thirty-Two.

Birthday: May 9th, 1991.

Zodiac Sign: Taurus.

Location: Downtown, Providence Peak, Colorado.

Birthplace: Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

Orientation: Bisexual, Homoromantic.

THE PHYSIQUE

Eye Color: Brown.

Natural Hair Color: Brown.

Height: 5′ 5″.

Body Type: Slim.

Allergies: Commitment apparently.

Dominant Hand: Right.

Tattoos: Verda printed on her left wrist, a whisk with magnolias on her right forearm and a knife with magnolias on her left (inspo), laissez les bon temps rouler in large print on her side (inspo), a tiny minimalistic crawfish above her right kneecap.

note: emmy will tattoo anything on her body at any given point she has no shame.

Piercings: Ears, Septum (done as a teenager, stopped wearing it around the time she appeared on television, but has recently re-introduced it to her wardrobe bc she’s Going Through It™.

THE INTRODUCTION

Her bio is so much more in depth, but to summarize Emeline (who mostly goes by Emmy) there are only a few words needed; hot abandoned mess.

Emmy’s mom was young and living in Pasadena, Texas where she worked as a housekeeper when she met Emmy’s dad and fell head over heels for his charming smile and extravagant gifts. They rendezvoused every few weeks for about a year before she picked up her life and moved to Baton Rouge, Louisiana to be with him. She had expected to move in with him, but instead he had an apartment set up for her and only showed up for a few nights every couple of weeks when he was ‘home from a business trip’. This woman was very clearly being bamboozled as The Other Woman, but was naive and innocent and in love so she as none the wiser.

After a few months of this, the man stopped showing up, his phone was disconnected, and Emmy’s mom came home to an eviction notice on her apartment door (aka he yeeted and stopped paying her rent). However, he did leave her with a little gift - a positive pregnancy test.

So, without any back up plan as her parents lived in Mexico and she wasn’t going to tell them she was pregnant and not married until Hell froze over, she found a roommate by the name of Amelie Boudreaux, a slightly older Creole woman hailing from New Orleans just tryna live her best life, and became a housekeeper for a local hotel to make enough to get by.

Because she worked early morning and long hours, when Emmy was born she spent a lot of time with Amelie, listening to old tales from the deep bayou and learning how to cook creole food, which was the woman’s favorite passion. It influence Emmy fairly early in her life and by the time she was ready to go to preschool, she had already learned two things in life; her numbers through measurements and that she loved creating food.

When she was four years old, her mom went to work early one morning, long before Emmy awoke as usual, and just never came back. Amelie was unable to reach the woman and without knowing more than a last name for Emmy’s father (which her mother gave her at birth, but refused to share any more details with the woman who would end up raising her daughter) there was no way to contact anyone to take Emmy in. So they just continue as usual and Amelie became the only mom Emmy ever knew.

Her love for cooking only continued to grow and she applied to multiple culinary programs when she finished high school, becoming a chef at a local restaurant in Baton Rouge, and eventually finding herself on a cooking competition that may rhyme with Bell’s Witchen run by a certain Rorden Gamsay when she was twenty-five. During her little stint on this particular show, she ended up flirting a little too much with one of the other girls during filming and when the show aired a few months later, Emmy, who had been in a stable relationship for two years prior, suddenly found herself single.

Without much else to do and craving a bit of adventure, Emmy moved to Providence Peak where her best friend already lived (and may have convinced her to move to) and took up a job as a chef at The Glass Onion before saving up enough to open the fancy, yet modest in size, Creole/Cajun restaurant Amelie’s.

Within the last year Emmy has had ups (the success of her first restaurant in downtown Providence) and downs (the death of her mother figure Amelie) and is currently Going Through It™, finding comfort in the familiarity of alcohol and strangers bodies. Though recently she's began the journey of therapy and becoming a better version of herself following the one year anniversary of Amelie's death, knowing she can't spend forever pushing people away.

THE HEADCANONS

While Emmy thinks animals are hella cute, she's not an animal person herself. The dead plant in her bathroom window proves that she sucks at keeping anything alive for more than a week and with her busy schedule, sometimes she forgets to even feed and water herself.

She never grew up with any siblings, but because her father is a... lover (and the world's biggest con) she definitely has at least another sibling or two out there from him. He most likely was married and had an official family the entire time he was leading her own mom on.

When drinking or stressed, Emmy has a bad habit of smoking, so you'll always find her with a pack of cigarettes and a lighter when she's at a bar.

Over the years she's grown to realize how Peyton Sawyer-esque, woe is me, people always leave she is (hey, self-awareness, right?) and when her old clunker finally died she invested in a red Mercury Comet.

Although everyone expects her to be fluent in Spanish, she actually knows very little of the language her mother took with her when she left before she even turned five. There are a few affectionate sayings and snippets of lullabies engrained in her mind, but she picked up more on Amelie's Haitian-Creole as the woman often reverted to the language she knew well while Emmy was growing up.