#there are two kinds of charcters that have knowledge and i think that's beautiful

[excarow]

Barbra knows many things in the way the old Librarian character has the exact knowledge the protagonist needs

Tim knows many things in the way that the comedic relief's crack conspiracy theory was proven correct in the final act

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Reviews! 3-5: Louie’s Eleven!

In my most anticipated ep of this batch, Louie’s Ocean’s Eleven esque heist gets derailed by his own ego and someone pulling a Die Hard while Donald finds love in an elevator living it up when he’s going down with the best Daisy in history. Romantic musical numbers, people being dicks, and suprise returns insure. Hey you kooky beatniks there’s gonna be a heist, tonnnniggghtttt under the cut. 

If the little intro blurb didn’t give it away, i’ve been waiting for this one all season, with the last two being okay but not amazing and a suprise treat respectivley. WIth Daisy debuting, a heist (a genre I love and need to watch more of) and the Cablleros, expectations were high... and met and exceded. Yeah while the show has disapointed me before (The Infernal Internship of Mark Beaks, which this episode is somehow a sequel to is the prime example. ) with an episode I was chomping at the bit for this one delivered.  The basic setup is as you’d expect: Donald, now having less parental obligations has gotten the Cablleros back together. It’s something Frank hinted at in the EW interview for this episode: That they wanted to explore just what Donald would do now he could ease up a bit. He’s not alone anymore: He trusts Scrooge again, He has Beakly to educate them and his sister to split parenting duties with and make up for lost time. He’s in a good place and has freedom for the first time in 10 years, almost 11... so what DOES he do with it? Up until now his life has been his kids: Sure his overproection of them and trying to get them away from Scrooge was more him projecting over his issues with Della and his childhood in general, but he still meant well on some level. Their his world, the thing he cares most about, and while the boys can be disprectful it’s been shown multiple times they truly love their adopted dad as much as their newly returned mom and Donald did an outstanding job raising them warts and all. What do you do when your life has been one thing for a good third of it?  It’s why I think him trying to get famous through his music makes a lot of sense: His college days and adventures were a happy time for him: hanging out with his best friends, doing something he truly loved, and doing something normal at the same time. So of course the idea of having them not only presumibly move to the area for this, so he has friends close again, and do something from a time he was truly happy... of course he’d jump on that.  But given our trio consists of a disaster area with horrible planning skills 90% of the time, a boisterous rooster, and a playboy Parrot, their plana mounts to “Go to rich people’s bathrooms and plkay and hope they don’t get thrown out”. Since that failed, Louie, being Louie steps in with a crooked contract (Which Donald relucntantly signs after Panchito has already forged his name) and an elaborate heist on tastemaker Emma Glamour’s annual party with the help of his 11: Louie himself, Dewey (More on him in a minute), one of the background characters, the cabs, webby, Huey (whose suprised to find out he just did a forgery), Gyro (who is TOTALLY not in just to test out his new headsets which TOTALLY don’t make your head go pop if you wear them too long) and Manny as his trump card.  But naturally this being a heist pastiche, things go wrong from the start: Turns out Glamour beefed up security with an old familiar face: Falcon Graves, who you may remember from infernal internship and was freaking awesome and kinda hot. He’s back, and Dewey’s understandably afraid of Graves spotting him given last time they met Dewey threw him off a roof.  Things naturally snowball from there: An attempt to have Donald grab a stage pass from Glamour’s assitant, Daisy, aka the reason everyone anticipated this episode so much including me, goes sideways because well Donald and he gets trapped in the elevator with her strapped together. Oh and she finds out he’s a party crasher here for his own plans. Great first meeting.  Meanwhile Jose and Panchito fail to get past the rest of security, Louie continues to undervalue Dewey and fails to schmooze Glamour, and oh yeah: Graves was pulling a Die Hard the entire time in a really nice twist I didn’t see coming. Graves brings in some familiar hired goons: The smashnikovs and Gabby McStabberson from the pilot, back again if in a minor role. The night is full of many happy returns, but we’ll get to the last suprise guest in a second. Meanwhile Donald bonds with Daisy as both feel ignored: Daisy is revealed to, in line with her charcter in general, be a budding fashion designer who wants her dress, the stunning green number that’s been circulating around, to get on the list and hoped by showing it to Glamour at the party and helping plan it, she’d throw her a bone. I REALLY like Daisy’s character here a LOT. She has Daisy’s empathy, love of fashion, with some added ambition and combat prowess, more on that in a second, while still being willing to call someone out if she has to, and even when she does so to Donald it is after she finds out he was gatecrashing her one shot at getting ahead in her dream career, calming down when she gets an understanding of his reasons and just how lonely he truly feels. Frank scraped together every good part of every version of daisy and left her old, horribly outdated and sexist “nagging girlfriend/wife from every sitcom that came decades after this character was created” characterization used at times dead and buried.  Speaking of Donald, the musical number was utterly beautiful, the clear highlight of the episode and wonderfully romantic, while also heartbreaking: and Donald not being listend to DOES really tie into his character for me: no one really has: Della and Scrooge flat out ignored his concerns about space travel, while the boys love him they will, with Huey being the outlier, ignore or dispresct him frequently. And even his two best friends bicker over their own directions for the bands while ignoring him up to the end, something I DO wish had gotten more focus, as do I wish the cabs had gotten just a touch more in general as their mostly off to the side. That being said I like this: besides being somewhat meta given donald’s spare use in season 1 and being only in about half of season 2, I like this: It shows that while he appears to take his family ignroing waht he wants constantly in stride inside he jsut wants SOMEONE to care about what he wants and needs, genuinely care. I mean “The Golden Spear” did show they TRY at times, with the cruise being an especially nice gesture, but most of the time they generally don’t think about donald when planning family outings or what not, it’s just one adventure after another with him left in the dust or fearing for his life. He’s a great adventuer, truly legendary.. but he dosen’t LIKE adventuering. He just wants someone who cares about what he wants.. and he’s found it in someone looking for the same and seeing not someone they love but don’t respect.. but a sweet kind man who just wants for someone to respect what he wants and genuinelyw ork at doing that. And he got it.  Before we get to the climax the other main plot, since both plots share equal time this ep really and are really just two halfs of the same main plot, the Dewey and Louie plot is a bit weaker. It’s not BAD but it is predictable, though it was nice to see Louie be the control freak and it makes sense: hustling what he’s good at so of course he wants to see his plan go through and get the glory... but he fails to be actually GOOD at heisting whicha lso makes sense: Louie’s good at manipulationa nd seeing angles.. but he’s so caught up in his own scheme, he can’t see them and is blind to the value of his own brother. While Deweey can be massively unehlpful and attention whorish, he does have a genuine knowledge of the partya nd Glamour that woudl’ve made things go faster, and it does fit his character enough not to be jaring and the ending of it, with Dewey providing a critical distraction AND getting on the list himself, whlie Louie saves his eleven and a huge fight with them, and daisy who proves every bit as badass and prone to bersekerr rages as her man, that’s a treat to see, is predictable, though the bit of Louie giving Dewey a new heist plan with his brother included and admitting he was wrong wa nice. It’s not bad, it just pales in comaprison to the donsy plot right next to it that’s so much fresher and more intersting.  However while the main brother conflict is mostly passable, the rest of the heist is wells et up and the ep as a whole shot up from good to great witht he climax, starting with a big, wonderful, and fucking hilarous reveal: Graves was after Glamour’s phone, which acesses her website and sold it off to the highest bidder.. and the second we find out that was his plan, it becomes obvious just whose coming back: Beaksy is back, to graves utter horror after the fiasco from last time, as he wants on the list. And while the minute graves mentioned he was selling off Emma’s phone I could tell Beaks was about to make his way in, the show did throw me a genuine , wonderful curveball: Emma is beaks mother. Given his mom is a cold and distant assholish tastemaker and “Coach Dad” apparently mocked his unatheltic son, it explains.. pretty much everything really. Graves is mortified and eventually just plans to say screw it and kill both for annoying him, another bit I like as it shows even a consumate professional can get fed up with the beaks family, understandably their Duckberg’s version of the Sapperstiens at this point, but Emma is saved by Daisy, who after Graves whaleson donald, returns the favor and beats the shit out of him. It twas glorious.  So things wrap up: everyone’s new faviorite couple takes turns telling Emma off who actually concedes to Daisy telling her someone needed to stand up to her, and puts her dress ont he list, graves is arressed by Detective Cabrera (to my utter delight, one last nice suprise) and the boys play their number.. they don’t get on the list because donald can’t sing, but Daisy is smitten and Donald likewise. Also beaks is squatted next to his mom whining like a petulant child because of course he is. All in all a great ending As you could tell I loved this ep. While again the main dewey and louie conflict was just kinda stock and predictable, the amount of energy and heart in the rest of the episode easily overrides it, and I was delighted both to see Graves come back and to see beaks suprise appearnce tying him to both of the episodes antagonists. Overall a well plotted fun romp despite it’s flaws and one of the highlights so far. An instant classic. As for where it ranks... 1. Quack Pack 2. Louie’s Eleven 3. Challenge of the Senior Junior Woodchucks! 4. The Lost Harp of MIrvana! 6. Double O Duck . HOpe you liked the review and if there’s any other episode from the first two seasons of the reboot or from the original, or from the disney afternoon or the animated marvel canon, just throw me a message or an ask. Later days.  Stray thoughts; 1. Huey’s bit was gold and I feel for the poor boy.  2. I was mildly disapointed the eleven mostly included exactly who you thought and Manny when we have a rather large supporitng cast to pull from. 

[noirwomaninred]

Grunts, gasps and moans of Final Fantasy 7 Remake review

My absolutely spoiler free review / thoughts about the game followed with under the cut spoiler “review” where I give my thoughts on the story which I absolutely forbid you from reading before you are done with the game.

Do realize that the under the cut spoiler section will have full spoilers not just for the remake but for the original Final Fantasy 7.

However the initial spoiler free review will go in depth to the game systems, so if you want to learn those on your own you would better skip the whole post.

Meat of the game (Combat system)

The game has an active battle system similar to Final Fantasy XV or Kingdom Hearts games but feels much more refined. You can play the game as hack and slash on easier difficulties, but the normal difficulty (with hard being unlocked ones you finish the game) tests your knowledge of the system at times.

By landing hits on enemies or just by waiting you fill your ATB (Active time battle) gauge and once you have enough of it you can do special attacks and use spells or items. This makes some moments quite tense when you are on low health and need to fill ATB by rushing in and lands bunch of hits in quick succession to be able to heal your character before they get killed.

You can also skip the active time battle by setting the difficulty to “classic” when the AI takes over your characters who automatically attack, dodge and guard against attacks while you can focus on just giving commands on what abilities, spells or items they should use when ATB meter is up. If you think your the AI isn’t doing good enough job you can take control at anytime and the overall difficulty of “classic” mode is same as easy.

You can equip skills, spells and active buffs by equipping materia, which are items that grant these skills. The characters aren’t able to use those skills if materia is unequipped, so you have to choose what works best for you.

On top of the materia system you have different weapons that give your characters different abilities. Using the said abilities they can learn them and can then use them even when the weapon is changed.

You take control of multiple characters and you are able to switch between them on the fly whenever you wish in combat. Each character feels different to play and have their own strengths and weaknesses.

Only negative I would have is that targeting system can be at times a bit fickle and camera occasionally can be fighting against you when trying to hit enemies who are above ground level. This is more of a nitpick than a real problem.

The combat system is great and has enough depth to carry a full game.

Grunts, gasps and moans (Audio)

This game suffers the same problem as most of the console games. There isn’t really a sweet spot for audio to be perfect. Music can swallow the dialogue or the other way around, the side dialogue can swallow the main dialogue etc.

If you haven’t guessed the title of my review comes from the audio problems the game has. The grunts, gasps and moans can at times be way too loud and just distracting. For example when character is clearly far in the background you can hear them grunt as if they were doing it right agaisnt your ear.

From let’s plays (and my own experience) the side dialogue heard by random characters on the streets are a bit too loud and distracting. None of these things isn’t anything that ruins the experience but it is a bit annoying.

What did you expect (Music)

Music is done by Nobuo Uematsu, along with Masashi Hamauzu and Mitsuto Suzuki. It is amazing and among one of my favorite video game soundtracks.

Everyone is so pretty and hot (Graphics / visuals)

Graphics of this game are unreal, every character is so pretty, lighting is on point and the art direction is great. They made trash look interesting in HD and that is saying much.. Though there are few times when you see low textures or even the infamous doors that are impossible to miss and look like they didn’t load correctly or just miss proper textures. This again is more of a nitpick and not a real problem.

Everyone is so nice and wholesome (Characters)

All the characters are likable and charming on their own way. The banter between the cast members is done really well and no one feels under utilized. Some side characters may be way over the top and anime if you don’t like that kind of thing but that again is down to your own taste. At first I had a bit of a trouble accepting some but I grew to like all them in the end.

Good guys are good and villains are villains. I like them all.

Final thoughts

The game is quite amazing on all fronts but at times it can feel a bit bloated and drag on during some sections though this is mostly down to your own opinion. Personally I didn’t feel the sections drag on in more than two points of the game when I felt the pacing was a bit too slow for what was going on (The other case being just feeling that area was stretched out and other a pacing issue for what was going on with the story).

I overall recommend the game if you are s fan of JRPGs, but as a remake of FF7 it is quite different and can be good or bad depending on how you like it. Though I will say that if you expected the marketed remake of the original story with expanded bits.. It simply isn’t it.

With that out of the way under the cut is the spoiler review and my thoughts on the story of the game. Do not read it unless you have played the game or just don’t give a f*** about full spoilers.

Here I will put up my thoughts on the full story and go deeper into certain scenes that has been added or altered from the original. Please know that these are my personal opinions and if you disliked something that I liked or that I disliked something you liked is fine, no hate coming from me so don’t toss it my way! Feel free to hit me up in instant messages if you want to discuss stuff.

The Avalanche gang

The side characters from the Avalanche have been greatly expanded upon and all of it is good, while Jessie got the most of it and I honestly don’t mind that.

We get a whole new side adventure with the gang which makes sense as part of the bigger plot and gives the characters time to shine. This also makes the emotional punch later on feel much more effective.

Train graveyard and spooky ghosts

This part that is added with Aerith’s backstory being expanded by just a small glimpse and having the characters run around with spooky ghosts is good.. But it is placed in the worst place when considering the full narrative.

At this time the characters are running towards Sector 7 to prevent the plate from falling on +50 000 people and to have a prolonged part with ghosts makes takes away from the build up and the agency of the moment. If this spooky ghost part would have been done in any other point of the story it would have been fine but now it drags on the part of the game that should feel intense.

Use of Sephiroth

PTSD / ghost appearances

I was all aboard for Sephiroth being a haunting ghost for Cloud with the worst case of PTSD. The only scene I would have cut from him would have been the first meeting with Aerith where he feels really out of place for me and the “you can’t save anyone” taunt talk would have been better used right before the plate fall instead of being used as a “hey, you remember Aerith is gonna die” moment that is just eh.

I especially loved the moment right after the plate fall when Cloud freaks out as Sephiroth taunts how he just let all those people die and all the others see is him freaking out because of nothing.

Final moments

To have him as a final boss of the game is just... Please, can’t you save anything at all for the end of the story? We already had our final boss of the whole remake story I guess. Overall in the end when they stopped using Sephiroth as a haunting ghost and turned him into a random big bad of the story, where he literally has no place in even with the changed narrative, is just quite lame for me personally and it felt like he was overused.

Shinra board of directors

All the villains are great. None of them is toned down and they clearly love what they do just as they did in the original game. Scarlett was a bit over the top but to be fair I always got the insane dominatrix vibes from her so it works. Hojo is absolutely delight on how creepy and off putting he is.

The changed story with them using the reactor bombings and the plate fall not to just turn the people against Avalanche but to sell a war to their civilians against Wutai is really well done and I’m excited to see where it goes.

The TURKS

The TURKS are all portrayed as they have always been. Great stuff.

Roche

Roche is a bit too over the top but he is way too fabulous not to like as a frenemy. It took a bit for me to warm up to him but I think he is a great addition. Though I think it is a missed opportunity not to have him have a second appearance at the very end during the motorcycle escape.

The Honey Bee inn

The Honey Bee inn might very well be one of my favorite gaming moments of my life. It is whimsical, way over the top and fabulous not to like. What I like the most of it is the fact they didn’t turn it into a harmful scene or a joke that might hurt the people who crossdress or fight with their gender identity.

I love the fact that they go as far as have the character in game state that one should always be who they are without fear and the beauty is something that the gender does not apply to.

However the cat calling on the streets for Aerith and Cloud was a bit too much and uncomfortable and the follow up sleeping gass scene, that was added instead of having the charcters just lead to the basement, was too real.

The plate fall and the aftermath

The plate fall event was quite spectacular and great overall. However I do think that Square has lost their touch on what the tone of certain scenes should be with the random appearance of Cait Sith (that will be just wtf moment for new comers who have no context for a cat with a crown) when everything goes down. It is really short glimpse but it was more than enough to take me out of the emotional impact and just make me groan.

It also took me a great attempt on suspension of disbelief to have Wedge survive the ordeal, but I managed it and accepted it. However as much as I wished for Biggs to survive I can’t suspend my disbelief so much. They had him die in front of the gang and if he somehow just passed out and they were silly enough to leave him behind (which I doubt they would have done) they had him be on the pillar that was destroyed beyond any recognition.. So yeah.. It truly does a disservice for the whole emotional impact of the plate fall and overall experience when the plot armor is so damn thick.

I mean right now I’m at the point of thinking that Jessie is alive because she “died” just like Biggs and if he survived so should she, right?

I really wish they would have had the guts to pull the trigger on the characters like they did in the original or at least write sensible ways to have some of the characters survive.

Jenova

I think they downplayed the horror aspect of Jenova and revealed too much too soon. There is no more a nightmare fuel scene in the game where you get to go through the eerie quiet Shinra building with bodies here and there with a blood trail and claw marks on the walls. Now it is simply reduced to following a spooky juice that might be purple glowing blood.

As fun as the boss battle against the Jenova was it felt out of place and confusing. I generally feel that the creators thought that they just had to cram Jenova fight in there and couldn’t wait for it to happen later or have Jenova get their proper introduction later on.

Rufus

Rufus, while he looks absolutely stunning, is downplayed. Now he is simply reduced to a random boss battle that is sudden and he has no real character introduction like he did in the original. Even his lines were given to Heidegger who had at this point been well established so this choice just feels bizarre. I realize he wouldn’t have much of a role here anyway but now Rufus didn’t even get a proper introduction for going forward.

Last bosses and Zack

The whole section that starts from the moment the gang stops on the highway and have Aerith give random speech how Sephiroth is bad and they should stop him and all, even without establishing why he is bad or who he is in the remake or how Aerith knows about him at all. Going forward it becomes a confused mess and the boss feels so out of place by being something that should have been in Kingdom Hearts instead of FF7 which is (or was) grounded on reality rather well up until the ending parts of the game.

They also give rather confusing scenes of Zack at the end with no context to anything that is happening until the very last scene of the whole game which I don’t mind.. But have Zack appear out of nowhere and not explaining it at all feels like a chep try for nostalgia and not much else.

However have him appear and walk past Cloud and Aerith as they head out of Midgar was great and could have worked if there wasn’t any additional scenes of him. To have this mystery character with Cloud to head towards Midgar at the end of the game would have been a great hook for the new comers but now it is just... It is what it is, I guess.

Constant spoilers

The game is littered with scenes of Cloud seeing to the “future” (who know how that will go now). Some of these are more subtle than others but some scenes are flat out spoilers that aren’t difficult to figure out by new comers.

I just don’t agree with this spoiler culture and it took me out of the experience at times, though I think that new comers have less of a problem with that if they won’t figure out what certain things mean..?

What absolutely felt too much was flat out showing Aerith dead in a flash forward, the meteor and destruction of Midgar of all things. Just stop.

The whispers

I absolutely hate this addition and before anyone loses their mind let me explain. The floating cloak people make some scenes cringe worthy (like them kidnapping Cloud and Aerith to have them fly away from Reno in comical manner) and they add absolutely nothing to the flow of the story.

For example the whispers prevent the characters from stopping Rude and Reno from making the plate fall... There was no need for them. They could have just had them fail without some “propfetic ghosts who make sure people die because that is how the story must go”. All the moments they “forced the story” to go certain way could have literally happened without them and without them it would have flowed much better.

They have Barret die for a moment just to bring him back by the whispers because his part in the story isn’t done yet. This is a cheap attempt for a tear jerker and takes away all the worry if he will be okay or not going forward for the new comers to FF7 since they wouldn’t raise him from the dead just to kill him off later.

They save the gang during the motorcycle scene multiple times just to make sure to dissolve whatever tension there is left by reassuring us that “hey our gang is safe because that is how the story goes”. They could have had them survive on their own.

Overall every time the whispers were on the screen they took me out of the experience first by just having me react by going “wtf are you doing here” and just made intense moments feel less so.. And now that I know what they were supposed to do I just think “all that would have gone down anyway” and “You literally gave plot armor a living form”? Not to mention that how they were included, would I agree or not (which I don’t) on their inclusion, they are written in the most cringy and poor fanfiction-y kind of way.

They apparently are the arbiters of fate which protect the original story of FF7 and by defeating them we can propably now have Aerith live and change everything. They are just used to give Square a permission to not just remake the game with modern gameplay, graphics and expand the original story but to flat out remake the whole story to something else. I can’t get over the fact they added time travel of all things to FF7.

I can't stand the fact that the whispers don't add anything to the narrative since without their involment everything would have happened naturally anyway. On top of that because of their "involment" to the story the narrative of FF7 Remake doesn't stand on its own by for example showing Zack with absolutely no context to anything, that even ruins his most iconic scenes that are used in the remake and Sephiroth ends up being "this bad guy who killed Cloud's mom and wants to destroy the planet for reasons that aren't explained at all and he apparently knows everything about the timeline" so even him being the big bad of the remake is just nonsensical when he isn't given proper context for anything that is going on. We simply have Aerith go "Sephiroth is bad and should be stopped" and we don't even get reasons why Aerith knows about him at all. The newcomers to the series have a remake of a game that doesn't stand as its own story without them knowing everything about the original game. They are just an excuse to have a justification for Square Enix to change the story going forward to whatever they want and after seeing how cringe worthy the whispers were I'm legit afraid the follow ups will be bad case of fanfiction.

I really, really hate that after playing through a long and arguably an amazing remake I’m left with bad taste in my mouth which stains all the great moments I had with it as all I will remember is how bad the ending turned out to be.

...I really hate to say this but the whispers act like a marketing scam. The game that was sold to us was a remake of a classic with expanded story but now what we have is retcon / reboot to turn it to who knows what going forward. Maybe what we will have in the future is amazing but I’m a bit sore after this.

Final Fantasy 7 Remake is a game that I loved 90% through but unfortunately I loathe the last 10% which is enough to take me out of the experience. Not to mention that 10% is more imporant to the mess of a story we now have than what happened in the rest of the game and it has such great implications on what will happen to the future parts of the remake.. So yeah.

...I just don’t agree and I legit have a fear this will turn into bad fanfiction going forward. I hope this will turn out not to be that way but the fear of it is real.