#there are too many trainees
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no thoughts. just the make-up and hair styling they did for 5-years-later Ryan:
#imma need gun attaphan to play an adult again STAT#we have been ROBBED for far too many years of the prettiness he can achieve#the trainee the series#the trainee#gmmtv#gun atthaphan
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2025 UCI WorldTour Debutant Ball
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Huub Artz (Intermarché - Wanty) | Niklas Behrens (Team Visma Lease a Bike) | Léo Bisiaux (Decathlon AG2R La Mondiale Team)
Matthew Brennan (Team Visma Lease a Bike) | Pablo Castrillo (Movistar Team) | Oscar Chamberlain (Decathlon AG2R La Mondiale Team)
Tibor Del Grosso (Alpecin - Deceuninck) | Robert Donaldson (Team Jayco AlUla) | Gal Glivar (Alpecin - Deceuninck)
Florian Kajamini (XDS Astana Team) | Jelte Krijnsen (Team Jayco AlUla) | Jørgen Nordhagen (Team Visma Lease a Bike)
Rasmus Søjberg Pedersen (Decathlon AG2R La Mondiale Team) | Giulio Pellizzari (Red Bull - BORA - Hansgrohe) | Diego Pescador (Movistar Team)
Brieuc Rolland (Groupama - FDJ) | Paul Seixas (Decathlon AG2R La Mondiale Team) | Embret Svestad-Bårdseng (Arkéa - B&B Hotels)
Tim Torn Teutenberg (Lidl - Trek) | Pablo Torres (UAE Team Emirates - XRG) | Darren van Bekkum (XDS Astana Team)
Max van der Meulen (Bahrain - Victorious) | Vlad van Mechelen (Bahrain - Victorious) | Albert Withen Philipsen (Lidl - Trek)
#important to note that this is not all of the worldtour debutants. many got left out bc of the tumblr post photo limit :(#graat. debruyne. huising. verstrynge. martinez. isidore. izquierdo. erzen. raccagni noviero. walker. toneatti. dehairs.#plus older riders getting their first shot at the worldtour: braz afonso. cepeda. donnenwirth. double. langellotti.#and it's also just wt but the proseries has them too - dalby. rondel. orins. de schuyteneer. wenzel. blackmore. weiss. pedersen. mouris.#is this worldtour debutants specifically instead of neopros just so i could include pellizzari and castrillo? you can't prove anything#bahrain alone has 7 neopros (including guys who were trainees part of last year) and all of arkea's transfers (5) are from their devo team#visma and alpecin each have five (4 from their respective devo teams) and decathlon has six (5 from their devo and u19 teams)#hate that seixas and philipsen are here. hate it. stop sending juniors straight to the world tour!#i guess full disclosure both van mechelen and van der meulen were trainees with bahrain last fall so not teeeechnically first time wt rider#but first full year so i'm counting them anyway#and teutenberg with lidl trek in the fall of 2023 too bc they didn't have a devo team then. but it's my post so i'm counting him too#yes glivar's is photoshopped. yes both he and del grosso are in the old alpecin jersey. i don't want to talk about it.#i asked for opinions and then decided to split the difference and use the old jersey but photoshop glivar into it with uh. mixed results#if that team would just release headshots in time we wouldn't be in this situation now would we. check and mate.#my apologies and thanks to jente michels whose torso and jersey i borrowed for that purpose#little guy posting
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no because the things i'm reading about it are actually insane, i've learned my lesson and i barely go into the tags anymore or am in tumblr that much for that matter but the things some people are saying about tae are so mean lol... people are just so entitled my god. i don't know if you agree but finding joy outside of fandom is easier and easier every day, for some shows specifically you're better off enjoying it on your own ANYWAY just wanted to let you know that i feel the same way
honestly i always expected this storyline to bring up a fair amount of questionable comments because unfortunately a very big part of fandom (and im talking about any fandom) has a very black and white kind of mentality, which most of the times means that when something like this happens in a show they try to fully put the blame on one character while lifting others from all responsibility, but that's not how it works, in life first of all, but also when it comes to stories
people saying tae deserved to be cheated on are wild to me, but tbh also are those who keep demonizing bahmee, a 21 years old girl who is coming to terms with the fact that maybe her relationship doesn't work while realizing that maybe she also wasn't as straight as she thought she was AND was drunk when she kissed judy. and like don't get me wrong, im not excusing her for what she did (although i don't like people calling her names), but what caused all this was the complete lack of communication between her and tae, and they're BOTH at fault for this
and while i usually HATE cheating storylines, i personally find this one very well written in the way the miscommunication and mistakes is built on are actually very human. this is why i want to wait before judging the storyline as a whole, because i do think there's something worth telling here, about falling in love young and eventually growing up and apart and learning about oneself and hurting people and finding a new way to care about each other (whether romantically or platonically) and becoming better (especially since they're paralleling them with janeryan where jane is the king of communication and maturity)
and i can understand people judging judy because she definitely should have known better, but idk it's just hard for me not to sympathize with both tae and bahmee, and the narrative is also obviously working hard on trying to make us see where they're both coming from, so i do find some comments kinda out of place tbh ;;;;;;;;;
anyway. sorry this got way too long and im not sure i was able to properly explain my thoughts on this matter, and i also don't know if you're actually going to agree with them, but still. thank you for letting me know im not alone in this!!!!!!!!
#IDK IDK TOO MANY THOUGHTS IN MY HEAD#this is like only friends all-over again ;;;;;;#and the thing is. i actually LOVE talking with people about stuff and exchanging opinions and theories#i just think people can also get a bit too extreme at times ;;;;;;;#okay im shutting up now sorry ;;;;;;;;#the trainee#m: ask
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I must admit something... I can't help it, I love First and Khao dearly but I'm finding myself not being even as 1/10 hyped for The Hearts Killer as I was for Not Me, Eclipse or even Only Friends. Like, idk what's that, the casting actors are good, the premise is interesting, some good effort put by prop department - and yet when I see bts pics, I just feel nothing (beside general Omg First with Tattoos, hot)
I guess I've been way too burned by GMM and specificslly Jojo stories D: Like, I want something good! But good and tight until the very end. And it most likely won't be, we all know what a mess OF was.
And it's another rom-com :') Like, all bts pics are just so obviously rom com with a sprinkle of action just for cool points, and there's nothing wrong with it, Jojo deserves to make the guys play out his AU fantasies and fans deserve to have fun and see firstkhao be all hearty eyes at each other, but...
I was raised with Not Me and Eclipse, both of which had really meaningful, strong political and society messages, morally gray characters fighting for freedom and equal rights, having emotional and strong chatacter growth with nice landing, and the execution held us all clenched until the very end ㅠㅠ I miss that experimental and bold era, and kinda afraid FirstKhao are gonna just get stuck into that cute-and-high-heat branded pair limbo...
You know, I secretly hope one day they'll have a project with P'Aof (but yeah he needs to rest so he can come back with a blast) and P'Waa (I only saw one-two series dorected by him and I almost have no questions, I need more amazingly executed BL projects by him). And imagine them working again with P'Golf 🥺
Anyway. Just a rant. I really miss watching Thai BL shows but I can't seem to find what I love anymore.
#not gonna tag as these are just my thoughts#and i can't judge until the series actually start airing but I don't have good vibes#and please also please edit everything before air don't do it each week after seeing fans tweets!!#i think the fact that I'm only watching Trainee even when I'm trying to tune in to other qls says something#that i need to unpack in myself#but last time i was drowning in a bl completely was Be my Favorite#and then gmm quality started dropping to below zero degrees#not in overall scenes but there are way too many fumbled endings or jarring editing or writing#with some exceptions ofc#anyway please THK prove me wrong
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⟢ highlight of the hour: daily dose of sunshine [3/12] ⟣
staying afloat
#daily dose of sunshine#korean drama#park bo young#mmkfav#ddoshoth#mygif#another scene where i shed tears!!#i cried so many times throughout this drama but this scene right here???#ooooo dont even get me started#it was so heartwarming watching dgy and jde help syc out and encourage him to get help#i couldnt stop crying!!#the 3 of them are so wholesome#combine this boat duck scene weaving in and out with the scenes of jde talking with the nurse trainee too?? absolute cinema!!#this scene was srsly one of my favs from the show#ill never shut up about it
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I just desperately miss being able to be silly at work y'all my boss has been so staunch about no downtime ever and it's really cramping my style 😭😭😭
#speculation nation#im putting in my 2 weeks soon anyways so this wont matter before too long#but just thinking about how he constantly complains about us sitting and chatting when theres nothing to do#like BROOOOO im doing my job im finishing my tasks just sometimes there's nothing to do!!!#or maybe im tired and wanna sit a bit did u think of that???#i cant even rly take breaks bc of the structure of how he has shifts happen#bc hes a stingy ass who cant spring for more than one or two people on shift Most of the time#how am i supposed to take breaks when im alone on shift or working with a trainee????? bitch#thinking many uncharitable things about him. let me fuckin chill sometimes god Damn
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therapists will be like "what do you think we could do in here that would help you with these struggles?" like bestie if i knew how to fix my problems i wouldn't be in here rn
#eliot posts#i don't blame them individually but idk i kinda am currently peeved about the whole general therapy system#and am bitching about it on here#i've been through the whole Ordeal with starting new therapists too many times to count#bc of specifically how the university's system works#like yay that it's free but GOD#you can kinda tell it's more suited to ''i'm homesick and my girlfriend left me'' type problems#and less towards ''my parents horrifically abused me and i have medication-resistant bipolar disorder'' type problems#AND they put a limit on how many sessions you can have with the Real Doctors and scheduling w them is Hell#do instead i've been going to the second programme that is TRAINEES (under supervision of A Real Doctor)#bc they don't have that cap#i felt like i was Maybe starting to get somewhere w the previous one but i don't get to see her anymore bc Scheduling Bullshit
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Next week will be the first time I am doing this, but definitely about to skip bahmee scenes in the trainee (let's wonder if there is any of the drama left)
#i can stand this fake ass bitch with her crocodile tears anymore#and the worse thing is the show just trying to force us to like her but never giving any development#just her blaming everyone or crying her way out of things ✨#i truly gave all the opportunity for this drama to show her changing#focusing on her career#but idk i hate when they give messy characters but are too scary for helding them accountable in the plot#her mistake was grossed over and now they are pretending it was okay for her to cheat? because she was lonely?#girl there was many options before cheating#like talking or breaking up#not cheating in your relationship birthday#the way she treated pah this episode says a lot too#he was the only one calling her out in her bullshit#so she goes and cry to her boo about how her boyfriend was mean (to justify the cheat to herself and the audience)#then when pah gets hurt#she makes it about herself#cries#and make it so that is hard for him to stay mad or actually call her out again#making herself the victim of the whole situation agaun#when the one that got hurt was pah#i never forgot by the way#all she chased her boyfriend every single minute of his breathing#causing problems during meetings and breaking important materials (the hd that could get him fired)#but sure he was the one being dependent on her abd begging her to care for his evrry breathing second#the trainee#the trainee the series#oh yeah#and i do know a lot of this readings are in bad faith#i can see what the directors are trying to portray here#but to me they are just delivering a fake shallow girl
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> [ What did you eat today? ] > [ What author is your fav? ] > [ Where do you go on weekends when you wanna get away? ]
> I didn't eat a thing. > But that's how it should be. > No matter what they ask me, > I won't tell them anything!
#Pokemon#Pokemon Black and White#Pokemon Black and White 2#Gym Leader Cheren#My Art#((He is so so tiny. I just wanted to doodle him in his regular colors..))#((I love how his cardigan tends to look inconsistent when I draw it but. It's definitely fluffy rather than plaid or with patterns..))#((Also I intended to draw him without his fluffy outer but I LOVE his poofy sleeves but! His polo underneath has long sleeves too :] ))#((The ruffled kind probably!))#((Aspertia City's angel that gets a reputation for being a heartbreaker because he turned down every confession ever-))#((-and once got so annoyed that he sent over Nate to rain on them and use thunder.))#((Caption is Trickle's cover of Idol! Funnily enough it is a Slater song to me. Somehow.))#((It's the whole 'avoiding interviews and questions about his personal life' thing))#((Even after post-BW2 and Relic Castle he absolutely REFUSES to tell anything about himself.))#((So there are many rumors surrounding him. The best friend/beloved of The Hero of Truth. Mentor of The Hero of Ideals.))#((Confidant of Bianca Alabaster- the professor's assistant and up and coming researcher.))#((Trainee of Hilda Weiss- battle prodigy and Battle Subway's shining star.))#((Mentor of Hugh Obsidian- the Team Plasma hunter who was chosen as Grimsley's successor.))#((Mentor of Rosa Whitefield- the new Pokestar Studios starlet and Skyla's possible successor.))#((AND he's Grimsley's brother.))#((The Heart reborn! The ghost of Undella Bay! The pure vessel of Kyurem!))#((And yet he stays silly. Divorced. Live laugh love. Cringe even.))#BW/BW2 Rewrite - Blur / Blight
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vaults over you
#30m scribbled thing before bed because its my rough time I get to daydream about caia#'i don't know girl. it's tough being the oldest child of my parent living with them. it's really draining lately.'#'i can vault 6 feet into the air with my partizan to disembowel someone with my clawed boots.' 'oh shit for real?'#more things I dont put on the artblog bc (vague noncommittal gesture) oh well look at caia in her trainee gear.#i watch too many jp armor cosplayers doing cool action shots lately...#i need an oc tag#my art#so tough drawing without the Overly Clean look of gpen thats been killing me lately when my pc screams if I use anythign else 😔
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I totally get it!!! I watched pd101s2 after it finished and it was chill, but I watched pdx101 as it aired and the finale was so stressful it made me sick the next day ;; I think gonna try watching boys planet!!
omg yeah i watched both those seasons live and like my faves made it both times but like it was so serious i was so stressed BDKDKD this season in particular was so bad for me tho to the point that i was so worried leading up to matthew's announcement that i zoned out all the speeches before his because i was so stressed and had to rewatch the announcement LMAO i hope u enjoy and pls pls come talk to me abt it if you'd like anon dearest!!!! 💕💞💘💗💘💗💘💗💘💞💘💖💘
#asks#anon#i think this season had my favourite trainee lineup of any season thats probably the only reason i didnt drop it after 5 episodes ndmdm#bc i tried to watch girls planet but nobody really like Grasped me and the different format compared to produce was weird#but like despite the fact that the auditions tht went viral for boys planet were bad so many of them r insanely talented#im happy with the debut group too#good luck with your watching!!!! 💗💗💗
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it's not even the weekend yet, and I'm stressing about next week in advance
#trying to stop#i have so many trainees starting#and now my boss wants me to do bootcamps too#like yeah when am i gonna practice my presentations?#never? ok cool we will be winging it#that aways feels good#practice at home? what off the clock??#it's fine im sure it will be fine#I wont lwt everyone down#no worries 🙃
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Dancing with ENHA as their Secret-Girlfriend!Idol!Reader
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summary: enha dancing with their secret significant other
word count: 4.2k
warnings: suggestive at times, not proofread, fem reader
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Lee Hee Seung:
It was public knowledge that you and Heeseung were friends since you had trained together at one point
However it was NOT public knowledge that you two actually ended up becoming a couple after you both debuted
With that being said, fans were overjoyed any time you were seen together, always thinking your interactions were so cute and wholesome
One day a video of the two of you pre-debut got leaked
It was a clip of a practice video of you dancing to “Bonnie & Clyde” by DEAN
The choreography was good and you both danced well, but anyone watching could tell that the two young trainees were nervous to be dancing with each other
Fans of both groups thought the video was pure gold though since it showcased how much you’d both grown as performers, and the fact that it was another interaction between their favs
The video trended on social media for about a week or so before the chatter and excitement was redirected to a NEW dance practice video…
which just so happened to be of you and Heeseung recreating the choreography from so many years in full
It was a well filmed, high quality performance
The two of you had even gone the extra mile and re-recorded the song as a duet, making it a full cover
Any trace of the awkwardness from your trainees days had been nowhere to be found
You and heeseung were dripping confidence and sex appeal as you danced together
A majority of the dance was spent with the the two of you in close contact- his arms around your waist, your palms trailing down his chest, him hands tracing the outline of your body
you were practically in your own little bubble and that shit read very clearly on camera
Of course your fans went even more feral
Twitter was full of praise for your growth and everyone was saying how you and heeseung must be so much closer now than back then
(if only they knew just how close👀)
And of course there were some smart fans (that unfortunately probably got called delusional) who could sense the thick sexual tension between the two of you
✪ ‘Y’all- there is absolutely NO WAY these two aren’t fucking😭’ ✪ ‘I genuinely feel like i’m interrupting something’ ✪ ‘Heeseung… if you’re not gonna get to work please step aside so i can have my turn with y/n’
It definitely was added to every single “top kpop moments of 20XX” video and thread
And since you’re both evil-
You each had made casual posts on sns about the process after
‘Did engene enjoy our little throwback collab?’ and the bitch posted a mirror selfie of the two of you sweaty and half dressed🧍♀️
Park Jong Seong:
Jay always loved watching you dance
Tbh jay loved to watch you do anything- but dancing was one of his favorites
Any time you had a comeback, he always wanted you to teach him the choreography as soon as possible- whether it was cute, sexy, or fierce- that boy was gonna learn it
Which meant when the song actually dropped he’d be the first to make a tik tok with you every time
And of course the opposite rang true as well-
Whenever enhypen had a comeback you were the first to learn the new choreo
The tik toks are always so cute too-
Like- that’s your man so of course you’re gonna be cute with him lmao
It’s mostly because you know he gets flustered so easily when you tease him or flirt with him in front of the other members or staff
It’s especially hectic when your comeback schedules overlap because trust their will be new tik toks every other day
You guys got especially brave when enha was promoting “bite me”...
Instead of just doing the pre-chorus together and posting that like the others, you did the whole pre-chorus AND chorus… WITH THE PARTNER WORK
If fans weren’t already going feral over the boys dancing with partners before, they definitely lost their shit at your mini collab
✪ ‘Oh my god… there’s no way this is real’ ✪ ‘Jay… your hands are a little low there buddy😅’ ✪ ‘So they just casually covered half of ‘Bite Me’ on a random Thursday? Okay cool’ ✪ ‘THE WAY JAY LOOKS AT Y/N OMFG’
It actually took fans longer than expected to realize you were filming together even when your promotional schedules didn’t lineup, so of course rumors started eventually
However it seemed like your fans were just rolling with it since your interactions were fun an cute (they’ve been praying for a collab stage between your groups since debut)
There was one time you filmed with heeseung instead of Jay and it lowkey threw everyone for a loop
Was it intentional? Absolutely not! Well- maybe slightly
You and your members were curious to see if anyone would react- had your fans even noticed that you only ever film with Jay? (yes, they noticed it right away)
So you can imagine the comments when you posted of you and Heeseung doing the choreo for “brought the heat back”
✪ ‘Uhmmm?? What happened to your man???’ ✪ ‘Omg no mom and dad are fighting‘ ✪ ‘HEESEUNG PLZ TELL ME YOU CAN FIGHT BRO’ ✪ ‘Peace and love but where is Jay…”
Yeah… it gave y’all a good laugh
There have also been plenty of time where you’ve posted your own little dance covers without Jay, or even just danced to his songs casually on live while jamming out, which always excited fans of both groups
Basically his fans and yours know SOMETHING is going on between you two and for some reason no one really talks about it like you’d expect them to…
Sim Jae Yun:
You and jake had been invited to be part of an end-of-the-year collab stage
It was supposed to be a fun little performance between a few different male and female idols
At the time- the only people who knew about your relationship were your groupmates, meaning it was especially hard to see each other without getting caught
However when your manager gave you the news that you’d be collaborating with a few different idols, and that your boyfriend just so happened to be one of them, your heart started to race
You attended a meeting with your manager in which you were informed that you’d be working with Lee Isa, Kim Gaeul, Kang Minhee, Park Jisung, and of course Jake
The stage would have three parts- a section for the girls, a section for the boys, and then one where you all came together
The overall vibe was fun and flirty, and you’d each be partnered with someone
The second the idea of “partners” was introduced, you and jake immediately made (what you thought was subtle, but was definitely not) eye-contact
The meeting wrapped up and you were immediately conversing with you were manager, trying to subtly convey how you thought it would make most sense for you and Jake to be partners
Unbeknownst to you, Jake was doing the exact same thing
Luckily, it worked and both of your managers were able to get the two of you to be partners
You all began preparing immediately, and since some of the partner work was different for each pair you’d all broken off to learn separate bits of choreography
You and Jake had begun working on a few different combinations, since the song decisions hadn’t been entirely finalized yet
The first one you worked on was to “Invitation” by JUNNY and Gaeko, which totally fit the vibe of the overall stage concept
Except it was maybe a bit TOO flirty (or perhaps that was just you and Jake)
You were easily able to connect and play into the each other’s artistry
Your relationship had always been full of playful energy and putting a smile on the other person’s face, so dancing together just felt like another extension of that
The choreography was intense and fast, hitting every accent and ad-lib, requiring a lot of texture and groove
but after learning the steps and running it once or twice to get the moves down it felt like second nature, especially since all your charisma and stage presence was really just you having fun with your boyfriend
Lots of behind the scenes content was filmed and unfortunately… some got leaked to the public
Somehow yours and jake’s first dance practice got leaked, as well as Jisung and Isa’s and the video of yours, Gaeul, and Isa’s section
This was before anything was announced to let the public know a collab was even happening so fans were shocked on so many levels
✪ ‘We’ve got (your group), enhypen, ive, nct, stayc, and cravity members doing a collab?? Where did this even come from???’ ✪ ‘Gaeul, Y/n, and Isa dancing to “greedy” by Ariana Grande was not something i knew i needed- welcome back “wow thing” collab group’ ✪ ‘Jake and Y/n look like they’re having so much fun together i love them :(‘ ✪ ‘I feel like I've never seen Jake have this much fun while dancing! You can tell he really feels comfortable dancing with Y/n’ ✪ ‘The way they look at each other, oh i feel sick’
Unfortunately after that all the songs and choreography had to be changed :/
Park Sung Hoon:
Close by Nick Jonas
As the main dancer of your group, your company loves to highlight you any chance they get
This resulted in you doing frequent dance videos, collabing with other idols in order to reach outside your normal audience and hopefully attract some new fans
Sunghoon, ever the supportive boyfriend, makes sure you tell him every time a new video is going to be released so that he can have youtube open and ready for when it drops
texts you immediately after about how talented you are and how proud he is of you for taking on the challenges of choreographing and coming up with new ways to showcase your skills as a performer
Sometimes will just randomly pull up your videos and start watching them while y’all are hanging out
You had always told him beforehand who you’d be dancing with and he never expressed being bothered by any of your idol partners-
until he realized you yourself were picking them
You were sitting in his bed one day (watching one of your recent videos lol) when he suddenly looked up at you with the saddest puppy eyes ever
“How come you’ve never asked me to dance with you☹️”
Oh he’d be so pouty and sulky omg
You’d been expecting that question for a while honestly
“Baby I’d love to dance with you, but would your company let us?”
sunghoon hated that you had to be logical all the time, so he just rolled over to bury his face in your stomach, and groaned in despair
(This drama queen)
He eventually just wrapped his arms around your waist and lifted his head to rest his chin on your tummy, peering up at you
“Can we ask them tomorrow…”
You couldn’t stop the affectionate giggle that left you as you played with his hair and nodded softly
The next day, you talked to your manager first- proposing your next idea
Now you see- your manager loves sunghoon, your whole staff does really
They all think the two of you are perfect together, and would honestly probably announce you were official right this second if hybe let them
So it wasn’t a problem convincing your team to let you dance with your boyfriend
Of course that wasn’t exactly the case for Sunghoon’s team
It definitely made sense why they weren’t totally onboard with the idea- being worried about dating rumors and such- but you and hoon hadn’t had a single rumor involving each other up to that point!
They eventually caved and agreed, realizing it would be a good opportunity since all the other idols you had invited so far were all known as well-respected dancers in the industry
You ended up decided on going for a more intimate and contemporary vibe than you had done so far
“Close” by Nick Jonas and Tove Lo was the song you had agreed on using, having had already talked about choreographing to this song together just for fun at some point
You had worked with a choreographer from hybe, expressing your vision and showing some of the ideas you had, and the process went extremely smooth
The dance ended up being sensual and emotional, highlighting both of your skills as contemporary dancers
A good chunk of the choreography was spent with the two of you having very little physical contact, but being so close to each other that it delivered such a feeling a yearning
However, the last chorus totally changed the vibe
You two walked backward, facing away from each other, and right as you were about to bump into each other sunghoon abruptly turned around gripping your shoulder and whirling you to face him- leading to a sequence of quick spins and paired movements, finally breaking the pattern of avoiding physical contact
And the rest of the dance spent with you two practically glued together
The performance continued with sunghoon pulling you in toward him, you running your hands up his chest and neck and landing softly on his face before pulling him down to almost meet your lips
The two of you slowly walked together to the beat of the music until sunghoon’s back was hitting the wall
It came to an end with hoon sliding down into a seated position on the floor, leaning against the wall- you sliding down in sync, landing on his lap- his face still in your hands, his hands on your hips, foreheads leaned against each other’s
The choreography was so intimate that unfortunately hybe’s fears came true
The dating rumors were instantaneous…
✪ ‘This is such an unexpected pairing but it makes so much sense’ ✪ ‘Oh! My bad y’all i’ll just- i can just- uhm- lemme just leave the room and come back later’ ✪ ‘I know y/n said this performance was gonna be a bit different from her other’s but i didn’t think THIS is what she meant😭’ ✪ ‘Soooo, is this a safe space to say I wholeheartedly believe Y/nHoon is real?’ ✪ ‘Girl Y/nHoon BETTER be real after THAT’ ✪ 'the thoughts i'm thinking... i feel like my account would get suspended if i shared them👀'
And if that wasn’t enough to get them going, there was all the behind the scenes material as well
Both your company and hybe had released behind the scenes videos of the project, except they couldn’t have been more different
While the one posted to enhypen’s channel was mostly sunghoon being interviewed and shots of him practicing individually, with the occasional partner shot or interaction between you two
Your behind the scenes video had plenty of shots of you and hoon laughing and playfully bickering together
Clips of you finishing the choreography and falling against him, with him wrapping his arms around you and swaying back and forth circulated twitter immediately
There were plenty of other moments that had fans fawning over your relationship
Such as when you wrapped up filming and sunghoon slid his hands from your hips to fully wrap his arms around your waist and pull you down to lay on top of him on the ground
Let’s just say hybe had to release a statement pretty soon after that
Kim Seon Woo:
Sunoo and you always post together
vlogs, lives, story posts- you name it
Most fans never really thought anything of it since a majority of the time it was just you two shopping, trying new snacks, or talking about skincare
But there was also so much content you didn’t post
Like the countless couples tik tok trends that are sitting in your drafts (his favorite is the one where you put on lipstick and accidentally smudged it, then the camera turns to him covered in lipstick kiss marks)
But there are also surprisingly a lot of random dance videos you have of the two of you
Sometimes when you’re hanging out at one of your company’s studios you’ll just turn on a song and come up with fun random choreography
One of Sunoo’s favorites that you guys have come up with was to “Wildflower” by 5 seconds of summer
It was sensual and flirty, but still fun and cute- and the video conveys that perfectly with how much the two of you are giggling and clinging to each other
It started off really well! Both of you were locked in, hitting the snaps and beats perfectly, your expressions nothing short of perfect and professional
But the second it got to the chorus your smiles were overtaking your faces as you tried to stay focused on the choreography and not burst out laughing
You still danced the routine perfectly! There just came a point in the dance where neither of you could stop smiling at each other
By the final chorus you were fully teasing your giggly boyfriend by mouthing the words with an overly flirtatious expression while running your hands down his neck and chest, causing him to squeeze your waist and teasingly pull you into him making you burst out laughing, before finishing out the dance with the biggest smiles anyone has ever seen
You both often rewatch the video and your smiles end up being almost as big as the ones you had in the video
You were sitting with Sunoo one day and asked him if it was okay to post it to your personal account, and he excitedly agreed
However- for some reason you didn’t check to make sure you were on your private account instead of your groups account before you hit post, and without realizing, uploaded your choreography to your groups official instagram with the caption ‘me and my wildflower sunny baby☀���🌺’
It was only about 15 minutes later when sunoo was scrolling through his own instagram when he turned to you panicked
“Baby… you posted it on the wrong account”
“WHAT?????”
You immediately called your manager crying and freaking out, while sunoo called jungwon trying to explain the situation
Both your management teams came to the agreement that no one would say anything about the video unless it got severely out of hand
They thought it would be best to keep the video up to avoid suspicion, However, you did have to change the caption
Aside from the crazies, most fans were eating it up!
✪ ‘I love that they’re so comfortable with each other, this is so cute’ ✪ ‘Their smiles and giggles🥺’ ✪ ‘I feel like we never get to see sunoo’s dance abilities highlighted, so i’m honestly grateful that y/n shared this’ ✪ ‘Oh they’re so in love don’t even try to deny it’
Yang Jung Won:
You had been hinting to your fans about doing more dance content, but the last thing they expected was for a video of you and jungwon dancing to “two hands” by Tate McCrae to randomly show up on your groups youtube channel one day
The video was professionally recorded in a cool location and the two of you had on cool but comfortable outfits
Basically y’all looked cunty asf and everyone was losing their shit over it but we’ll come back to that
The choreography involved the two of you being in some sort of physical contact for almost the entire thing
And when you weren’t touching, you were face to face staring into each other’s soul
It was lowkey like you were leading the dance at times and jungwon was hypnotized by your movements (which let’s be honest, he totally was)
By the last chorus, you and your boyfriend were in full contact
Jungwon’s hands had pulled you in closely, your hands resting on his chest with his low on your back
There was a moment where you just sensually gazed into to each other’s eyes, caressing each other while you mouthed the words to the song
Jungwon leaned in closing his eyes, fully preparing to kiss you, but you teasingly turned your head back toward the camera right as your lips were about to meet, giving a flirtatious wink and smile
The turn caused jungwon’s lips to brush your neck, but the way it was captured by the camera made it hard to tell if he actually made contact with your skin
The rest of the dance consisted of one or both of you having your hands on the other without a break, never breaking the connection
There was even a part where you had your hand on your boyfriend’s face and he followed your movement, seemingly hypnotized by your touch
Jungwon’s hands quickly found their place on your hips shortly after
The dance finished with two posing- you in front of him, reaching behind to place your hand on the back of his neck, as he placed his hands on your hips
Won gently rubbed your hip as he waited for the director to call cut, ad when they did he collapsed against you, fully wrapping his arms around your waist and tucking his face into your neck
(That cute moment was captured and posted on your instagram story after the official video dropped)
Speaking of social media…
The thing is, both you and your boyfriend are chaotic and slightly evil, so the second the video dropped y’all were refreshing twitter to see people’s reactions
✪ ‘Oh okay so they’re a thing’ ✪ ‘Yang Jungwon and L/n Y/n… WHAT IS THIS????’ ✪ ‘So like- do y’all need a third or…’ ✪ ‘HIS LIPS WERE LITERALLY ON HER NECK I’M NOT CRAZY’ ✪ ‘Need whatever they’ve got goin on real bad’ ✪ ‘Jungwon heard the lyrics “your two hands on me at all times” and took that shit literally wow’ ✪ ‘Y/n turning to look at the camera right as won is about to kiss her… GIRL MOVE IF YOU’RE NOT GONNA KISS THAT BOY’ ✪ ‘The hand placement, oh i’m so fucked’ ✪ ‘L/n Y/n the woman you are…’ ✪ ‘The way Jungwon’s movements get obviously more desperate at the end of the choreography when Y/n has her hands on his face… WALK HIM LIKE A DOG MAMA😛’
You and Jungwon were giggling and saving posts were a good two hours
Nishimura Riki:
It wasn’t unusual for you and ni-ki to hang out in a practice room and just jam, coming up with random choreography combinations for fun
It also wasn’t a secret that the two of you knew each other and hung out, but most just assumed you were friends since you had also hung out with other members of enhypen before
However neither of you had ever posted anything together aside from mayne a couple of tik toks
So it came as a shock to his fans (and yours) when Ni-Ki went live, only for everyone to see him cozied up in one of hybe’s practice rooms with you
The live started with the two of you laying on the floor with the phone propped up against the mirror wall at the front of the room, just chatting and giggling over random stuff (losers in love)
In fact Riki was so chatty that fans were even starting to comment on it
‘The only time Riki has stopped giggling or yapping has been to listen intently to y/n..’
‘I swear these two are so chatty together, what's going on??’
Eventually you guys started getting antsy and decided to turn on some music and jam again
It was just some ciphering back and forth for a while until “pour up” by DEAN came on and you froze and made eye contact
“Should we do it?” Ni-Ki asked in regard to the choreography the two of you had come up with to the song earlier that week
“I mean… why not?” you shrugged with a mischievous smile
“It’s a little… risky- don’t you think?” he giggled while unconsciously moving closer to you, but you just giggled in return before starting the choreography while holding eye contact
He laughed a bit in shock, watching you dance for a few more seconds before joining in
By the time the chorus arrived the two of you were locked in, facing forward again toward the camera
It seemed like pretty tame choreography at first with a slightly sensual
Until the second verse came
You and Riki started crossing paths and interacting more within the choreography, showing off just how much chemistry you have together as dance partners
There were plenty of little moments with little flirtatious touches here and there but the connection was on full display by the last few seconds of the song, with Riki’s arm draped casually around your waist as the two of you swayed side to side
You pretended to walk off as the song ended, still feeling the vibe, but as soon as the next song started playing you screamed dramatically and fell to floor in a heap of embarrassment, leaving your boyfriend to laugh at you from behind
Ni-Ki walked past you back to the phone to check the comments and he noticed the viewer count has tripled since before you started dancing
✪ ‘They way they just casually match each others vibe like it’s nothing’ ✪ ‘So can we all agree we need more Y/n and Riki dance content??’ ✪ ‘I would 100% be asking “what are we?” after this…' ✪ ‘Y/n falling to the ground and screaming after, she’s so real’ ✪ ‘OMG LOOK AT HOW RED THEY ARE NOW AWWWW BABIES’
Neither of you could look at each other without giggling for the rest of the live
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notes: hey y'all... i'm back (kinda)
#riki x reader#nishimura riki x reader#jungwon x reader#yang jungwon x reader#sunoo x reader#kim sunoo x reader#sunghoon x reader#park sunghoon x reader#jake x reader#jake sim x reader#sim jaeyun x reader#jaeyun x reader#jay x reader#jay park x reader#jongseong x reader#park jongseong x reader#heeseung x reader#lee heesung x reader#enhypen x reader#enha x reader#enhypen scenarios#enha scenarios
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is it casual now? (teaser) 🫀 seungcheol x reader.
★ seungcheol x makeup artist!f!reader. ★ teaser word count: ~8,000 ★ genre/warnings: mdni. 18+ content. situationship/friends with benefits, light angst, use of pet name ('love'). soft dom!seungcheol, making out, biting/marking, protected sex. let me know if i missed anything! ★ footnotes: this has been on my backburner for months. it's admittedly a full-blown story in need of hard editing, and so i'm posting this in hopes of bullying myself into working on the whole thing. should it come down to it, though, i like to think this can stand on its own. enjoy. <3
Seungcheol has been in the industry long enough to know that everybody had vices.
Trainees, rookies, veterans. It didn't matter. There were dangerous, risky vices. Alcohol, drugs, smoking. There was dating, too, of course. Dating fans, dating fellow idols.
Seungcheol didn't do drugs. He smoked socially, but he would rather not. And he drank, sure, but never to an unhealthy amount. Dating, however—
Did it really count when there was only really ever one person he treated like a vice?
You've been in his life since the group debuted. Nine years, give or take. And then, at one point, he just... tried something with you. And it clicked, fell into place, and now you've been sneaking around for the better half of three years. It's the one place Seungcheol feels like he can breathe, can get away. But it's also the biggest secret he's kept.
You're his makeup artist, after all.
When the two of you started off, you both insisted on nothing serious. To 'keep it casual'.
That worked perfectly for Seungcheol. He likes to think it's still working for him, as he raps at the door of your apartment and waits for you to open up. His wristwatch says that it's midnight, but it doesn't matter. He knocks a little louder, growing a touch impatient.
You open the door, and you're greeted with Seungcheol looking reproachful. "Yah," he chides. "Why haven't you been answering my texts?"
When you rub your eyes with the back of your hands and look over your shoulder to glimpse at your wall clock, Seungcheol almost feels apologetic. Almost. “Cheol,” you say exasperatedly, slowly. “It’s the middle of the night.”
"So you were sleeping then, hmm?" Seungcheol says. The corner of his lips tilt up, just slightly. He leans against the doorframe, taking a brief amount of time to glance you over. As he does, a small wave of tiredness finally washes over him— just how late had he kept himself up working on new music? "I sent you texts hours ago."
"You didn't even read them." He reaches up, tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. He sighs, the sound almost exaggerated. "How cruel of you."
You let out a low hum at Seungcheol’s fingers brushing against your skin. “Mmm, I fell asleep with my phone in my hand,” you admit, the words coming out more like a soft sigh than anything else.
You seem to finally drag yourself out of your sleepy state to give Seungcheol a once-over. He knows it shows all over— the exhaustion in his eyes, his stance. He’s tired, and you can tell. You’ve always been able to tell.
You step aside a bit and he takes that as his cue. Seungcheol moves past you, a small hum in the back of his throat. He toes off his shoes and shuts the door behind him with a soft click. In spite of himself, the moment he's inside, he reaches for you.
One arm is loosely slung over your shoulders, pulling you in close. He rests his chin on your shoulder, the tip of his nose against your neck.
"You fell asleep..." he gripes. "Do you know how many texts I sent you? I sent five.”
“Five”” you repeat as you bear Seungcheol’s weight. Your hand instinctively raises to stroke the base of his hair behind his neck, and he thinks he could melt then and there— your soothing touch, your light tone. “Oh, how ever will you live?”
Seungcheol huffs into the crook of your neck. The feel of your fingers in his hair does wonders to combat the tired, stressed part of himself. Slowly, his shoulders relax, and he sighs, the sound long and deep.
"Don't get snarky with me," he mutters. But there's no bite to it at all, just a quiet sense of contentment in his voice. "You could've at the very least read the messages." He moves, presses a kiss to your neck. "Would've taken ten seconds."
“I was asleep,” you protest, but— whether or not you notice— your head is tilting around a bit to press a lingering kiss on to the side of his face.Seungcheol's stomach flutters. You're sweet like that. Always have been, always will be. He hums under his breath at the kiss, his hand that's on your shoulder moves up to cup your cheek.
“That’s my penance,” you say drowsily.
"One kiss isn't nearly enough," he tells you.
He pulls back from your shoulder to look at you, now. The eye contact, the way he regards you, has a more focused weight. He takes a moment to look you over again— hair mussed, face still flushed faintly from sleep. "Two,” he says in a tone that brokers no argument.
“Greedy,” you mumble, but both of you know it doesn’t matter.
Not when your free hand finds purchase at his side and you use your fingers in his hair to pull him down so you don't have to stand on your tiptoes. Not when you press your lips together into a kiss that's soft and sweet, almost sleepy.
All it takes is the sound of your voice for Seungcheol to be pulled in— when you tug at his hair, he follows, his chest against yours. He bends down, his own hands coming up to the sides of your face.
He melts against your mouth, his eyes closing in an instant. But it’s done as quickly as it started. You pull away, your face still inches away from Seungcheol’s, as you smilingly mumble to him, “There. Two kisses.”
His eyes open again once you pull away, his grip on your face tightening just slightly. "Three," he mutters back, and then he leans back in.
You hum against his mouth, the sound breaking free from the back of your throat. You’re both so tired from your respective work and it shows in the kiss. No heat, no fire. Your tongue swiping over his lip makes Seungcheol hum, quiet and low in his throat. He's usually so used to being the one who takes control, making the first move, but here with you, in the early hours of the morning— there's something else to it.
He pulls you closer against him, his hands moving down to your hips. Against your mouth, he murmurs, "Four," before his tongue slips in, just to get a taste. Just to linger, just to savor, but not take over.
“Cheol,” you huff, though your reprimand is tempered by the way Seungcheol is intent on keeping the kiss going. “You’re— mmph— being greedy—”
"Five—" he sighs against your mouth. "Let me be greedy a second more."
One of his hands moves to the back of your head, fingers tangling up in your hair. This is what he likes, this is what he always comes to you for. Something that's simple. This, he can deal with. This, he can handle.
It’s never a second more with Seungcheol. He’s always out the door when he can go, when he has to. He’s never been a glutton for time, and so it’s enough for you to sense that something is wrong.
You break away from him.
Seungcheol has to resist a whine when you pull back, his eyes fluttering open in a daze. Your hand has moved to his face and you’re looking up at him with a small frown and a quiet query. “Long week?”
He lets your question hang in the air for a moment, the hand in your hair loosening its grip, fingers just idly combing through the strands.
He glances at your face— the furrow of your brow, the hint of concern in your eyes— and it makes him sigh. He turns his head to press a soft, quick kiss to your palm.
"Long year," he corrects.
You look like you want to say more. Seungcheol almost begs you not to. This— whatever the two of you have— it’s an outlet that won’t break him, won't ruin him, won't tarnish him or the group's name. He just wants— he needs—
You know exactly what he needs, even if he doesn’t always know himself. “How do you want your fifth kiss?” you ask instead of commenting on his obvious fatigue.
Your question makes Seungcheol's head empty out in an instant.
It takes him a moment to think, to consider. His mind, hazy and tired as it is, struggles to come up with an adequate answer. All he knows is that he's comfortable, that he's tired, that you're here. And that's all he really needs, in the end.
He lets his hand fall from your hair, to the nape of your neck. "... Soft," he murmurs. "Soft and easy."
You’re back up on your tiptoes to give him what he asked for. A sweet, slow press of your lips against his. It’s a kiss that lovers give each other, even though you’re the furthest from that.
It's easy, easy, easy for him to fall into the kiss just like that, a shudder running down his spine when your tongue doesn't invade him. It's sweet, it's chaste, it's simple. It's exactly the kind of kiss he needs after a week of work.
His hand on your neck moves to your cheek, his thumb brushing over the skin there. He breaks away for a mere second, a fraction of a beat, to catch his own breath, but he kisses you right back after.
"Six," he whispers desperately. "Again."
This time, you laugh against his mouth— a slightly muffled sound, not any less amused— but you give in, still. When you separate for air again, one of your hands rests on his chest to keep him away. “You have to let me breathe, Cheol,” you huff.
Seungcheol has to resist groaning outright when your palm on his chest keeps him from coming in for another kiss. You're adorable like this, in the middle of the night, with sleep in your eyes and annoyance in your voice.
He knows he's being needy, taking advantage, but at the same time? It's all he seems to be able to do. Greedy, he hears you call him, and it's true.
"I'll let you breathe when I get my seventh kiss, then," he grumbles.
He can see the annoyance blooming on your expression, but he’s saved by one thing and one thing alone: The fact that you can get pretty greedy sometimes, too, especially when Seungcheol was involved.
"Fine," you say haughtily, feigning annoyance. "Just one more kiss."
Seungcheol's eyes glimmer with something akin to mischief. His hands move to your face again, his own lips curving up in a smirk. You give him an inch, he wants a mile. It's his style. "One more kiss. That I can work with."
He brushes a thumb over your cheek again, his grip in your hair loosening only to brush some stray strands away from your face. "Only fair that I get to pick the way, then," he says, his tone low.
He's going to make the most of this opportunity, and you're letting him.
His tongue darts out briefly to lick over his bottom lip. "Open your mouth."
When you let out a noncommittal hom and oblige, parting your lips, he knows he’s gone. Seeing the obedience in your face makes Seungcheol's stomach do a little bit of an excited flip. You're like this, this, even when you're tired, when you're barely awake.
It's a little addicting.
"Good," he says softly. It's all the warning you get before he's got his mouth on yours again.
He kisses you— devours you, his tongue parting your lips, sliding into your mouth, taking. The kiss is almost bruising and seems to throw you off balance, but you quickly recover by pressing flush against Seungcheol and holding the sides of his arms. If he were a better person, Seungcheol would let this be the last one. Would let this kiss end and call it a night.
But then the smallest of sounds escape you. A whimper, a soft noise that only makes all sense fly right out of Seungcheol's head. It's not fair, he thinks, that you still have a hold on him even in the middle of the night.
All it makes him do is pull you closer— press you up against the wall with his entire body, his hands still gripping your face as he kisses you deep. Harder than he usually would, rougher than he normally did.
He swallows the sound, his tongue still in your mouth.
Your fingernails are pressing into his biceps now. Your tongue is sinking into his lower lip; not quite biting, but enough to drag his focus away for a moment. "Seung," you sigh, and it’s like music to his goddamn ears.
He was Choi or Seungcheol when he was in your makeup chair. Cheol, when it was just the two of you. But Seung was something different entirely.
A small moan, low and quiet, gets caught in Seungcheol's throat when you bite into his lip, when you whine out his name like that. He knows what it means when you call him like that— knows what he's in for.
He relishes in it. In moments like these when he gets to be like this. When he doesn't have to be responsible, when he doesn't have to be a leader. He gets to be just Seung.
There isn't a single part of his body that's not on fire right now, not when he's got you pinned against the wall, not when you're all satin and soft against him. His grip on your face tightens, and now his lips are no longer on your mouth, but on your jaw, moving down to your neck, your throat.
A quiet, needy little ah falls out your lips when he nips at that spot on your pulse point, and there, there is exactly when he knows that he's got you exactly where he wants you. Pinned by his body, shaking and shivering like he's touching you for the first time.
If he was feeling a little less riled up, a little less needy, he'd keep up the teasing. But he can't, not now. His hands move from your face to your hips, moving under the satin of your pajamas. It's not enough, never enough.
Every sound that leaves your mouth, every little please, just, already sets a fire in his brain. Every part of his mind turns to static, white noise, as he keeps his lips on your throat, your neck, biting and nipping at your skin.
“Seung,” you hiss, your hands flying to his shoulders as you press your back on to the entryway wall, willing yourself not to crumple. “I’m going to get a noise complaint again—”
“I'll pay the fine,” he murmurs against your skin, his lips against your collarbone now, his hands still on your hips. His brain is starting to grow fuzzy, his thoughts less coherent, but this was the goal.
To get you like this. Soft and shaking and desperate. To make you his for the night, for just a little while. To hold some sort of control over something in his life.
“You can't just keep paying for— ah— the fines,” you’re babbling. “They're going— t-to kick me— Seung, fuck!"
Whatever you’re trying to say dies out when Seungcheol nips at your warm skin. The rational part of him, somewhere deep, deep inside, knows that you're right. He can't keep paying your fines for complaints of loud music and loud sex.
The part of him that's currently working on painting a bruise on your collarbone doesn't seem to care all that much.
"I'll pay," he repeats, between leaving a few more marks on your skin for good measure. "As many times as I have to—"
“Jesus Christ,” you cuss, your chest heaving as Seungcheol’s hand moves higher and higher up your shirt. “My neighbors are so fucking sick of me, and it’s all your fault.”
“My fault?” Even through the haze in his head, Seungcheol can't help the low scoff that he lets out. He wants to say that he couldn't care less about your neighbors— wants to say that your pretty mouth makes up for the noise, but something else catches his attention. The brush of his fingers on bare skin.
His eyes go wide, his brain suddenly clearing.
"You're not wearing anything underneath your pajamas," he deadpans, his voice coming out in a low drawl.
Of course, that adds up. You hadn’t been expecting Seungcheol, after all, so he can’t blame you for foregoing the underclothes. Still, it only stokes the growing flame in the base of his stomach. Especially when you move your head back against the wall so you’re looking right up at Seungcheol, the ghost of a smirk on your face.
“Wanna check for yourself?” you taunt.
A low groan falls out of Seungcheol's mouth as soon as you ask that. Like clockwork, his hands go to the hem of your shirt, pulling the fabric up slightly. Just a little bit, just to see if you're really not wearing anything beneath.
"You always like to tease," he says, his voice low. That hint of a smirk on your face is only serving to drive him that much crazier. "Go on, then. Show me, since you want to act all cocky."
You give him half an eye roll that’s more affectionate than anything else before reaching over to the back of your pajama collar. You pull the top over your head in one deft, swift movement. Seungcheol's eyes go wide for just a moment, taking in the sight of you, undressed, in front of him. It never stops shocking him, never stops making his heart thump a little harder, his breath coming out a little more labored.
“Happy?” you half-joke, your voice low.
He looks at you, up and down, before his eyes go back to your face. His hands move from your hips to your waist, fingers tracing over the sides of your chest as he shakes his head.
"Not yet," he says. "But I will be."
His hands keep tracing over your skin, his touch light— almost feathery, as he keeps his eyes fixed on your face. There's something about seeing you so exposed like this that's driving him absolutely insane, something about you being entirely at his mercy that's making his eyes grow dark.
He leans in, bringing his lips just past your ear. "Turn around," he murmurs, almost like a command.
He sees how you swallow hard, how you take in the familiar darkness in Seungcheol’s gaze. You know him, have known him for years, and that comes with trust. Unflinchingly, you twist around in his arms to press your chest against the wall.
He has you practically trapped, all against his chest and the wall. His eyes look at you up and down, taking in your bare shoulders and back, the way you've submitted to him so perfectly.
His hands go to your hips again, and his eyes look over your back, following the line of your bare spine. "What do you say we find a use for this wall besides me just pushing you up against it," he murmurs. "Hm?"
“Yes, please,” you whimper, and as soon as you agree, Seungcheol's hands tighten on your hips, his grip almost bruising as he pulls you a little closer to him. You're not going anywhere, not when he's got you like this.
He leans in, his body practically pressing up against your back, his chest against your skin. He bites down on your shoulder, pulling a strangled whine out from somewhere deep in your throat. "You look so goddamn pretty like this, love," he murmurs against your skin.
His hands move from your hips to your chest, tracing the skin there before he brings them up to your throat. He presses his fingers against your pulse point, feeling the thump thump thump of your heartbeat.
He can feel your heart thrumming against his hand, can practically hear you shaking. It's driving him absolutely insane— you, underneath him, trembling for him. The knowledge that he's got you like this, the fact that you're letting him take control, letting him do whatever he wants.
He moves his mouth to that spot on your neck again, the skin that's so sensitive that it makes you whimper and shiver. He always finds it so easy to tease those sounds out of you, and always relishes in doing it.
His hands stay at your neck, his fingers still pressed against your pulse point. This had always been one of Seungcheol's little habits— a single finger on your pulse point, as if he liked seeing which actions would make your heart rate spike, which words would have it hammering.
Seungcheol presses his lips on your skin again. "You're so loud."
He marvels at the way you ball your hands into fists, the way you shake all over with poorly concealed want and need as he keeps nipping and marking. "‘M not," you gasp, lurching forward against the wall. "‘M perfectly— hng!"
Everything is working in his favor.
You're shaking, and your heart is racing, and every noise you make is just more fodder for him. God, he loves it. Loves being the one to make you absolutely tremble and shiver like this. Loves the fact that he's the only one to make you feel like this.
"You're mine," he says again, bringing his mouth closer to your ear. He bites the shell of it, hard, before letting out a low hum.
This is his favorite place in the entire world— right against your back, feeling your body heat against his chest, his tongue running over your skin. He loves how reactive you are to him, how sensitive you are, how your body just melts under his touch.
"Say it," he mutters against your skin. "Who's in control?"
There it is. The million won question.
The whole reason you started these rendezvouses in the first place. He had been spinning out of control, and you had been lonely, and you clicked into place like magnets.
You give in, like you always do. The words are a soft whimper, almost a shout in your otherwise empty apartment. "You. You're in control, Seung."
That's all he wants to hear.
He digs his fingers into your jaw and wrenches your head so it's turned to look at him, his lips inches from yours. Even if there's a little pain, nothing in him is stopping. "Good," he mutters, his breath hot against your lips. "Good girl."
The kiss that follows is absolutely messy, the kind of kiss where it's just tongue and teeth and raw need. It's worlds different from the soft and easy kisses that Seungcheol asked for earlier, when he first came in complaining about five unanswered texts.
"Seung," you groan as you pull away for air. "Please—"
When you moan his name, it's like something snaps.
He growls low, his fingers slipping into the waistband of your shorts, gripping the fabric hard enough that there's a very real chance of them ripping. "Please what?" he mumbles against your neck. "You need to tell me what you need, love. Use your words."
"I hate you," you whine, and Seungcheol nearly smiles. He knows you’re not fond of begging, but he needs to hear it from you. At least, he wants to.
"You know what I—" you’re saying, but dammit, his control is already razor thin as is. He rips off the last fabric of clothing on you until you’re completely bare, pressed entirely up between the wall and him.
Somehow, your mind still has some shrivel of coherence to complain, "I liked this set, asshole!"
He grins against your skin at your words, chuckling at your whine, at the way you're just reacting to him. You can act annoyed, you can act like you don't need him, but he knows. "I'll buy you a new one," he hums, finally letting go of your shorts and letting them fall to the floor in tatters. "One for me to rip to shreds all over again."
That thought alone makes his blood sing.
It takes you a great effort to turn around, but somehow you manage. Seungcheol is still fully clothed and so your bare chest presses against the front of his shirt. The sight of you, naked, his hands at your hips, pressed right up against him, against his chest like this— he's gone.
And then you’re asking him, low and sweet as he has you caged in, "Where are you going to fuck me tonight, Seung?"
He can't even manage a word for a moment, his hands holding you so tight that he's definitely going to leave marks on your skin, his eyes fixed on your face.
He swallows hard, his mouth suddenly dry at the question. "You want me to say it out loud, hm?"
You go to steal the upper hand for a minute or so, and you do it so effectively. Your hand rises almost lazily to his neck, your finger instinctively finding his pulse point. He feels his heart rate speed up as he watches, just watches, you do it. You stand on your tiptoes to raise your lips directly to his ear.
All he can feel is the thunder of his heart racing against your hand. You seem to notice it, too, if the smile on your face is any indication.
"How about you just show me instead?" you say, and he’s convinced he’ll pass out then and there.
"You're a brat," he mutters through gritted teeth, his hand moving up from your hips and up your spine. "A brat who needs to be taught a lesson."
He takes a shuddering breath, almost completely lost in your little game, before he snaps back to himself. Seungcheol's hand leaves your hip and goes to your hand, gripping your wrist hard. "On the sofa," he says, and it’s nothing short of a command.
He practically drags you on to the piece of furniture, watching intently as you fall back with a small oomph. Seungcheol stands on the edge of the couch as you prop yourself up by the elbows to watch him right back.
The sight of you underneath him— your hair splayed against the cushions, your eyes half-lidded and fixed on him? It's absolutely perfect. It's the kind of thing that he wants to keep in his mind forever, the sight he wants to always be able to remember.
He lets out a noise under his breath as he undoes the button of his jeans, the sound of the zipper going down obscenely loud in the quiet room. "Gorgeous,” he breathes.
He gets his jeans undone and kicked off, his shirt following them not long after, and then he's on top of you, caging you in, his hands either side of your head, staring down at you.
The look in his eyes isn't something he really gets to show often— that raw need, that want, how desperate he is for you. He wants you, God, he wants you so badly, and you're letting him have you.
He dips his head to your neck, his lips against your skin, his breath hot against your pulse point, still absolutely obsessed with that spot. His hands find your wrists, pinning them back against the couch, while his knee finds its way between your thighs, pressing up against you.
You arch and squirm underneath him, visibly distressed with the facsimile of friction that you’re getting from his knee. “Seung,” you pant, grinding your dripping core against his knee. It sends a jolt of electricity through him. “Please— don’t wanna wait any more—”
“Where’s all that snark now, hm?” he teases, his teeth running over the skin on your neck. But he’s not any better off, his own self-control slipping through his very fingers as his hips grind down against you desperately.
"Been driving me insane, love," he whispers, pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses along the line of your neck. "Been dreaming about this for days. Missing you—”
A low keen escapes you, and he can only echo it as you tug at the last piece of material separating you. “Can we get this off already, please?” you huff as you hook your fingers at the waistband of his boxer shorts.
He groans against your skin, his teeth finally letting go when he lifts his head to look down at you, the expression on his face looking like he's fighting for control. "God, yes," he groans, lifting his hips just enough for you to tug them off him.
He kicks them off once you’ve yanked them down, and his hand— which has instinctively gravitated to your pulse point— feels how the beat absolutely skyrockets. One of your arms goes around his shoulder and the other, surprisingly, clutches his jaw.
You’re looking right at him as you say, "Fast and hard, Seung."
"Yeah?" he says, just the slightest hint of a surprise in his voice. "You want me to be rough with you, love?"
Seungcheol was usually a sweet lover. He liked taking his time, liked being gentle and responsible even in bed.
But there were particularly rough weeks, terrible days, where he just needed a means to an end. Where the sex was an outlet, where the best thing you could be for him was his.
He waits for your permission, because he still always remembers to ask no matter how far deep you’re in. The agreement comes in the form of the best three words.
"Ruin me, Seung."
You know him too well. You know how he works, you know how he thinks, and you know him better than anyone.
He groans in response to your words, his head dipping down to drag his teeth gently over your collarbone. He's trying to hang on to his control, he is, but it's a losing effort.
"I will, love." His breath is hot against your skin, his hands finding your hips. "Just give me a minute—"
He shifts, just for a moment, to find the condom in his jean pocket. He goes through the motions until he's back on top of you again, one hand coming up to grip your hip again, the other coming up to rest against your throat. He looks down at you, his eyes almost glowing.
"You trust me?" he mutters. His hand at your hip tightens; his hand at your throat barely clenches around your pulse point, his eyes never leaving yours.
You can feel it, see it. The way the little threads are beginning to unravel and fray. The way this was no longer Seungcheol of SEVENTEEN; not the leader, not the idol. This was something different entirely, someone else completely.
"I do," you whisper back, your eyes so full of adoration for him that he has to bite back the urge to scream. "I trust you, Seungcheol."
His full name is what really does it for him, because then he's pushing in, and you’re gasping, whimpering, trying to adjust around him and the fact that you’re practically clenching him on the get-go. Seungcheol eases in, nice and slow, because you’re too tightly coiled for him to do more than carefully bottom out. You’re both heaving, your breaths coming out as gasps; your own breaths are sharp, harsh, because Seungcheol is still choking you a little.
His head dips down to your shoulder because he needs something to hold on to, anything, while his mind spins. His head is dizzy feeling you like this, feeling you around him so tightly. He's trembling, his thighs shaking, but he's holding himself back as long as he can.
When Seungcheol gets as far in as he can possibly get, you let out twin groans. He’s completely sheathed inside of you and you’re fluttering around him in a way that’s dangerous.
“Y’can move, Seung,” you reassure him after a moment, the words coming out strained with desire. “As fast and hard as you want.”
You sound strangled, just like he feels, and it's taking him a mammoth amount of control to hold himself back. He groans against your shoulder at the sound of your voice, the words you say. He wants to move, to thrust, but he's trying to have some semblance of composure.
"Love," he says, his voice wrecked. "I—"
His voice breaks. It breaks, because there is only so much he can take, and he's beyond that point now. There's a tremor in his thighs, his hands clenching in the cushion below you.
You drag him right back down, with the sound that you let out that’s halfway a whine and a sigh. One of your hands goes to rest in the space between Seungcheol’s shoulder blades, as if to steady the two of you.
Your voice is surprisingly firm when you speak. "Let go," you command. And then, softer, "I need you."
Your words, your voice— it's in complete conflict with the situation you're currently in. And yet, it works. He lets out a sound, one that's somewhere between a growl and a whimper, his breath hot against your skin. And then he's moving and he's holding nothing back.
He's hard, brutal, and he's taking. His teeth on your shoulder; his breath against your neck; his nails digging into you.
It's a relentless, dizzying pace. Seungcheol bullies into your weeping cunt, fast and hard, and it draws out the most obscene sounds from you. Gasps, whines, an occasional scream when he hits a particularly sensitive spot. What has him seeing stars is the fact that you can't seem to settle on a name to moan. "Seung— Seungcheol— Cheol—"
Yes, you're saying, yes.
Seungcheol loses himself, utterly and completely, in you. You're on the edge, he can hear it; he can feel it, and God, he wants to hear you say his name. Every single one of them.
It almost sounds like a mantra, your voice, as he takes and takes and takes, his breathing harsh, ragged.
You go through all of the names you have for him, breathless and wrecked, until you can't even say anything because his hips are snapping into you with a ferocity that's rare but not unwelcome. Your pornographic moans reverberate in your otherwise empty apartment, and Seungcheol thinks he might go insane.
"'M close," you choke out. "Cheollie, baby, I'm— ah, fuck— Seung—"
His breath catches at your words, his eyes closing for a moment as he groans. You, you, in all your perfect, glorious, undone state. It’s a sight he wishes he could capture, freeze in time.
He lets out a whimper, his words almost slurred when he responds. "Love— I—"
He's never been this rough, never this intense. You're the only one, the only person he's ever let himself go like this with. The only person who he's ever let see everything, take everything.
He's on the edge, he's there, he's—
"C'mon," he whines, his voice barely above a whisper, his hand clenching hard around your hip. "With me, love, please."
It's a miracle that you can even nod, can even find your voice as Seungcheol keeps on going with his erratic, stuttering thrusts. "With you," you gasp.
He snaps into you, then, and you arch up with a scream of his name. There’s the familiar white-hot flash of pleasure; the impossibly tight clench of your walls around him.
He stays buried in you for several long moments, his forehead resting against your shoulder, his breath coming in ragged gasps, his heart pounding so hard he can feel it in his ears. He has never felt so utterly spent in his entire life, never been so completely, utterly drained of energy. He's weak against you. He’s weak because of you.
"God," he finally manages to mutter.
He lifts his head, just enough to be able to look at you, but he can't even muster a grin. He's spent and he knows you know that.
His hand comes up slightly, to brush the hair off of your forehead. "I think..." he says, his voice thick and hoarse, "I think I ruined you, love."
You let out a breathless laugh, one that you have to push out of your heaving chest. "You—" you try to say, but the words don't form, not at first. You take a few moments to take in some air, to gulp past the lump in your throat. "You're a fool."
His lips twitch into a tired but genuine smile at the sound of your laugh. It’s a soft sound that he's always thought sounds beautiful, especially coming from you.
A hoarse, broken laugh of his own escapes; his hand coming up to rest at your jawline, his thumb gently tracing over the warm skin there. He's still catching his breath, but he's slowly gathering himself.
"Am I a fool?" he asks quietly, leaning his forehead against yours. "What does that make you, then?"
You’re a fool, too, he thinks to himself. For letting me have this.
Instead of answering him, you press a small kiss to the corner of his mouth. It’s the only answer he’s going to get from you for now, it seems.
He lets out a soft huff, moving his head back just slightly, his eyes closing. "You're beautiful, you know that?" he says quietly, his voice still rough with fatigue.
"Every time," you respond. Your own voice is strained, almost tired, but there's a hint of amused exasperation. "You say that every time, Cheol."
His eyes opened once again to look at you.
"Because it's true," he says simply, his voice soft and sincere, the hand resting at your jaw moving to brush your hair back from your face. "It's always true, love."
He lets out a soft sigh, his eyes tracing over your face, taking in every inch of you. His eyes pause at your lips for a moment, his tongue gently wetting his own, his gaze finally moving back up to meet your eyes.
You thread your shaking fingers through the back of his hair and answer his unspoken question. "Kiss me soft and easy, Cheol," you whisper.
The moment the words leave your mouth, he's in action.
He leans forward without a second thought, the hand not buried in your hair going to rest on your hip, his lips meeting yours in a soft, gentle kiss.
There's no heat in it, no want or need. Just a soft press of his lips against yours, gentle and slow.
It's languid and unhurried. Like there's nowhere either of you have to be after this. For a moment, you can pretend that this is normal— that Seungcheol will not have to leave, and that you’ll not have to change into new pajamas because he'd broken yours, and that you can be... well, something, anything aside from what you are now.
But it's wishful thinking, you both know, so all Seungcheol can do is kiss you. He lets out a soft sound, almost a sigh, as his tongue slides into your mouth, his hand on your hip tightening slightly. His other hand is in your hair still, his fingers gently tracing over your scalp, his body almost melting against yours.
He will have to leave. He always does. But for now, he's here, with you, and you feel perfect, and—
Five minutes, he bargains. Five more minutes.
And then things end, not really by your own accord.
The sharp, shrill sound of Seungcheol's phone ringing breaks through your haze. You pull away, a bit jolted at the foreign sound— at something other than your words, your breathing, reverberating in the room. It takes you a beat too long to realize someone is calling him— his phone in his discarded jeans— in the godawful middle of the night.
He lets out a loud groan, the sound tired and drawn out, and he can't help but rest his forehead against your shoulder once again, letting out a resigned sigh.
"God, save me," he mutters, his voice rough. "What time is it?"
You chuckle lightly. "Go on," you urge softly, not because you want to but because you have to. "Answer."
Seungcheol lets out another loud, drawn out sigh, his shoulders slumping in obvious defeat. He reluctantly lifts his head from your shoulder with a grumble, but he can't quite stop himself from pressing a kiss to your cheek just before he shifts up and off of the couch.
Once he’s reached down to grab his phone from where it's stuffed in the pocket of his jeans, he answers without looking at the caller ID. "Yeah?"
"Hyung!"
It's Soonyoung— of course it's Soonyoung— calling.
"Are you still at the company?" the younger member asks. "I think I forgot my headset in one of the practice rooms, and Minghao said you didn't go home with them."
"It's midnight, Soonyoung."
You shit over on the couch, careful not to make any sound. Not to give Soonyoung any suspicion that Seungcheol might be somewhere where he shouldn't be. You press a small, reassuring kiss to Seungcheol's hip as Soonyoung goes on to whine, "Yeah, yeah, I know. But it's the expensive headset, hyung. If you're still there, could you check? Please?"
Seungcheol lets out a huff— a mixture of resigned affection and irritation— at the feeling of your lips against his skin. He can feel the exhaustion deep within his bones now, and all he wants to do is go back to snuggling into you for the night.
But he can't say no to Soonyoung, especially not at this time of night.
"Fine," he grumbles, letting out a huff. "Which practice room?"
You can hear the moment Soonyoung practically brightens with triumph.
"Third floor!" he says happily, and you bury your face into Seungcheol's side to keep yourself from laughing. "You're the best, hyung! I'll buy you a meal tomorrow for the trouble!"
He reaches down with the hand not holding his phone, pressing his palm to the top of your head, pushing lightly down. A warning of don't laugh. "Just be thankful I'm your hyung, kid," Seungcheol grouses.
Soonyoung ends the call soon enough, saying some things about sending Seungcheol a photo of his headset so he knows exactly which one is missing. When it's back to just the two of you again, you tilt your head up to look at Seungcheol.
"You're really going back for it tonight?" you ask, even though you already know the answer.
The corner of his lip twitches into a half smile at the way you look up at him. His eyes takein the sight of you— his hand on the back of your head, his fingers gently twisting strands of your hair.
"Of course I am," he sighs. "I can't say no to him, love."
You shift upward so you can sit side by side with Seungcheol. Both of you have yet to put on any clothes, but you’ve at least gathered your bearings enough to form coherent words now.
"You can't say 'no' to any of them," you tease as you press a gentle kiss to his cheek. There's an almost blinding affection in your tone as you say, "You and your goddamn boys."
Seungcheol reaches out, wrapping an arm around your waist to tug you closer to him. Briefly, he presses his lips against your hair. His eyes are almost tender as he speaks.
"They're my boys," he says, his voice soft.
You let the words hang there for just a moment. It’s an admission, one that both of you have known for the longest time, but it's also a reminder. It’s the reason why you and Seungcheol can never be more than this—because he has his boys, and he would never do anything to jeopardize them.
You press your face against the column of his neck for just one more precious moment. You’ve never been selfish about Seungcheol, but there were nights when you thought about it. Just… thought about it.
The thought never wins.
"Let’s clean up, get dressed," you whisper into his skin. "So you can head to the company sooner."
He lets out a soft, almost painful exhale. He knows what you're thinking, what you're feeling; he's thought about it himself, as well. He hates having to leave you, hates having to say that he has to leave you. But his boys are his boys, and one day all this will be over, and then...
He can't think about it right now, though.
Instead, he nods, pressing a light kiss to your temple. "Yeah."
It takes about ten minutes or so for you both to gather everything together. Seungcheol still looks tired, though for different reasons now. He’s essentially traded one exhaustion for another.
As he puts on the shoes he left in your entryway, you lean against your doorway with your arms crossed over your chest. "I’ll be holding you accountable for my pajama set," you warn him. "And for tomorrow’s noise complaint."
"Yeah, yeah," he huffs, taking a step toward you. "Don't worry, I haven't forgotten."
His face softens as he reaches you, his hands coming up to grab your elbows, gently pulling you closer to him. "Sorry," he says. "Again."
"You’re not sorry, " you sigh pointedly, more out of spite than anything. It’s the truth—he’s not really that apologetic about losing control every now and then, about your neighbors knowing you’re being pulled close every so often.
When you bury your face into his chest, he lets out a low, gruff chuckle, his chin resting gently against the top of your head. His arms wrap around you, holding you tightly against him, just like every single time before.
"You’re right," he murmurs. A quiet, affectionate admission. “Not sorry. Not even a little.”
He holds you there against him, his eyes fluttering shut as he allows himself just a few more moments before he has to leave. You both stay there, allowing yourselves that moment, until the tension in Seungcheol’s shoulders fades and your annoyance at your torn pajamas ebbs. It could’ve been five minutes, maybe less, but then Seungcheol’s phone pings with a text—surely Soonyoung asking if he’s found his headset.
You’re the one who takes the step back, putting some distance between you. "Drive safe," you tell Seungcheol. "Text me when you’re there."
Resigned. That’s the only way to describe the smile that tugs at his lips. "Yeah," he says. "I will."
True to his word, Seungcheol does indeed send you a text about an hour or so after he'd arrived at the company, informing you that he was there and had found Soonyoung’s headset.
He's still exhausted, and all he wants is to be back. Back inside of you, back with you. But he can't do any of that. At least, not right now. Not at this point.
I miss you already, is the only other thing he adds to his text.
Your text comes in only moments later, like you had been waiting by your phone.
you're a fool. head home. take care.
A soft sigh escapes him the moment he reads your text, his eyes flickering over the words you'd typed, the harshness of it. It's another layer of protection for the both of you, but it's still not easy to read.
He's about to respond with something snarky, some light-hearted joke to tease you a bit, but he stops himself at the last moment. He knows that you're right.
He needs to head home. He needs to take care.
And he’s an absolute goddamn fool, in more ways than one.
#seungcheol x reader#choi seungcheol x reader#scoups x reader#seungcheol smut#scoups smut#seungcheol imagines#scoups imagines#svt x reader#seventeen x reader#svt smut#seventeen smut#( am i happy with this ? not ... entirely! but it's here! LOL )#( i think i've mentioned once before that i'm not very good at smut so this was dizzying )#( but it's also The longest svt fic i have in my drafts. i just cant be assed [yet] to beta it )#( anyway.... enjoy [???] <3 )#(💎) page: svt#(🥡) notebook
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something about how redstart, despite being an unheard of company until boys planet, is handling their trainees so well makes me so happy
#sending them to america#and also promoting them immediately after their eliminations#too many companies force their trainees back into the dungeon which is so dumb bc shouldnt you be trying to keep whatever hype they got#during the show??#dabae speaks
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14 stuck with you — gold rush !
scaramouche x gender neutral reader
FLASHBACK — PREDEBUT
SCARA’S POINT OF VIEW
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From the age of seven, Scara's life had been meticulously mapped out for him, each step carefully dictated by his mother. He never really understood what it meant to have a dream, because the only dream that mattered was hers. Whatever path she carved for him, he walked without question, even though it never felt like his own. His mother had been a star, an idol adored by millions, and from the moment he was old enough to stand, she began pushing him towards the same spotlight.
He’d seen clips of her on stage — laughing, singing, shining — but when he looked at her, that wasn’t the woman who raised him. The mother who showered him with cold praise, forced him through grueling training sessions, and demanded perfection from him was a stranger in comparison. It was as if she lived in two worlds: the adored idol everyone saw, and the distant, sometimes cruel figure he called mom.
As he grew older and the demands of training intensified, the resentment began to settle in his chest like a heavy weight. The idea of becoming an idol, once something that had been drilled into him since childhood, now felt like a prison. He watched his mother perform with a mixture of awe and bitterness. She had everything, and yet, no matter how hard he tried it didn’t bring her any closer to him.
He watched her performances, mesmerized not by the dazzling lights or the applause, but by the sea of faces, all of them adoring her. He didn’t long for the idol life itself — the rehearsals, the endless pressure, the fake smiles — but for the one thing it seemed to offer: the love. The kind of love that came without question, without effort. What would it be like, he wondered, to be loved by so many? Could that love ever fill the emptiness inside him? The aching space where the warmth of a mother should have been?
Would anything(one) ever fill that void? //
It was another late night, just like the countless others that had blurred together in the past year. The fluorescent lights above flickered and hummed, set on an automatic timer. As Scara moved through the hallways, they snapped off behind him, leaving the space in silence, save for the echoes of his footsteps. It was late — far too late for anyone else to be here. Who else would be foolish enough to be training at this hour?
He rounded the corner and paused when he saw a dim light spilling from the practice room. It was you — slumped against the wall, looking like you might’ve passed out mid-session. He wasn’t surprised. You were the only other trainee who seemed to have the same tireless obsession with training as he did. The only one who shared his endless need to push further, even when your body begged you to stop. He’d be more shocked to not find you there.
He pushed the door open quietly, shutting off the speaker blaring the same practice song on repeat. The room was quiet now, but the exhaustion in the air felt thick.
He glanced at you again, lying there with your head tilted awkwardly against the wall, your eyes closed as if you were trying to escape the world. It was a sight he’d seen too many times in the mirror.
Part of him considered just starting his practice — pretending you weren’t there and taking over the space like he always did. But then he hesitated, letting out a small sigh. As much as he didn’t like to admit it, he wasn’t heartless. Your face held less color than usual. He walked over, nudging your leg with his foot, watching you stir but not wake up.
He tapped your cheek lightly, his fingers cold against your skin. "Hey," he said, his voice almost too soft for someone like him. "Wake up."
You startled, eyes snapping open, and you sat up so quickly that the world around you seemed to tilt. You blinked, disoriented, like you were trying to make sense of the room spinning around you.
"Fuck," Scara muttered, stepping back a little as you swayed on your feet. He noticed the faintly pale color of your face and how your hands shook when you reached up to rub your eyes. “You look like shit.”
You tried to wave him off, but your dizziness made it clear you weren’t. Scara sighed, his gaze briefly flickering to the corner where his leftover sushi and energy drink sat. Without a word, he grabbed both and handed them to you, the sushi still cool and slightly squished from being in his bag too long. Better than nothing.
"Here," he said, his voice a little sharper than he intended. "Eat something. You’re stupid to train without eating." He paused before adding, his tone almost annoyed but with a hint of something else — something like concern, "I can’t use the room if you’re still here." Otherwise you’ll burn out. He wanted to add. But he kept his mouth shut.
You took the food from him, still dazed, but something in his words seemed to register. Scara stood there, his arms crossed as he watched you take a bite of the sushi, then sip the energy drink, both of you in the awkward silence that came from two people who’d never quite figured out how to talk to each other outside of training. Your groups were going to begin joint training next week, he assumed you’d both be less awkward like Kazuha had mentioned.
"You’re not the only one who wants to make it, you know?" he muttered. "But you won’t make it if you’re dead on your feet."
You swallowed, still feeling the remnants of dizziness, and stared at the floor for a moment, the words gnawing at you. Then, before you could stop it, you let out a laugh — bitter and low.
"I don't know... Sometimes I'm sitting here like, do I even deserve any of this?" you muttered, almost to yourself as you poked at the sushi.
Scara looked at you like you’d just said something absurd, his expression unchanged. "That’s so fucking irrelevant.”
You blinked, thrown off by his bluntness. "Wow, you sure suck at comforting," you shot back, an edge to your tone despite the exhaustion.
He didn’t flinch. "Do you want it?" he asked, almost nonchalant, but there was a strange weight behind the words.
You looked up at him, confused. "...What?"
"If you want it, that’s all that matters," he said, his gaze steady and unwavering, like he was daring you to argue.
You met his gaze, nodding stiffly. "Yeah... I guess I do want it."
He gives a single, sharp nod in return. "Then stop wasting time. Just keep going."
He turned to make his way back to the speakers, but for some reason, his feet felt heavier than they should. What the hell was that?
It was a stupid thing to say. "If you want it, that’s all that matters." He didn’t even believe that. His passion had been dead for a long time, buried beneath the pressure and expectations. He didn’t want it anymore, not like this. But it didn’t matter, because that wasn’t his problem. Not anymore.
Still, as he reached for the speaker, he glanced back at you, and something caught him off guard. The way your eyes had sharpened after his words, like you’d found something in them. A spark. A flicker of want, something raw, something real. Because of something he had said.
It made him pause, just for a second.
He didn’t get it. Why did that look bother him so much?
Hypocrite, he thought. I’m telling you to keep going, but I’m barely hanging on myself.
And yet, seeing that spark in your eyes — that tiny flicker of hope — was enough to make him feel... something. Maybe it was the smallest hint of his old drive, or maybe he was just sick of standing in the shadows of his own doubts. Either way, it made him want to keep going, too. To not give up, even if he couldn’t figure out why anymore.
He shook his head, muttering under his breath as he adjusted the speakers. "Whatever."
He could’ve been lying, telling you whatever he thought you needed to hear. But for the first time in a while, he wasn’t sure if it was just for you, or if it was for himself, too.
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From the very beginning, you were a walking conundrum to Scaramouche. Determined, relentless, with a fire that matched his own. Every time he set his expectations high, you reached up and snatched them away, tearing them apart and forcing him to rebuild his entire worldview. He became used to it. Addicted to it. To the erratic look in your eye when you finally beat him.
You made him feel like he was always running, always chasing something…or someone. The routine he had perfected for himself was suddenly irrelevant, because with you, there was no rhythm. No predictability. His relationship with you was the only dance he did with two left feet. He didn’t know how to dance with you. How to be with you. At one point he gave up on learning the choreography. It was never the same thing twice with you.
But for some reason, he wants to keep dancing with you.
Before you, Scara never really wanted anything. He had always been the best, that’s what happens when you’re trained to the bone, until you’re nothing but skin and worn muscles. And he liked being the best. It was the only thing that made him feel like he mattered, even if it was just for a moment. He liked the way other trainees turned their heads when he walked into a room. He liked being chosen first every week. It was the only validation that made him feel worthy and worth something to his mother, who had never given him much of that.
But then there was you.
You worked just as hard as he did — harder, in some ways. You were better than him, but he’d never admit that out loud. Not to you. The first time you scored higher than him, it sparked something inside of him. Something like… challenge. Was this what his mother had felt when she wanted to be an idol? Was that why she pushed him so hard? Maybe.
But when he looked at you, all he wanted to do was beat you. And so he did. He tried, and he tried, but you both kept outdoing each other. It was maddening, but in a strange way, it felt refreshing. Finally, something wasn’t handed to him. He had to work for it, just like everyone else.
Was it his hatred for you that drove him? His hatred for his mother, for everything she’d demanded of him? He didn’t quite know. He didn’t care to figure it out. All he knew was that it felt good. It felt real.
But it wasn’t supposed to get this bad. The glares you sent him when you crossed paths in the hallways, the bitter words exchanged that cut deeper than they should have. The tears you shed because he’d said something too harsh, and the way it gnawed at him afterward. But neither of you could back down. Not anymore. You both were too far gone.
And then there were the moments where the competition wasn’t so loud. Where you both pushed your bodies past their breaking point, too tired to go on, and collapsed in the same practice room, side by side. Waking up just to drag yourselves through another grueling session, pushing harder, trying to outdo one another.
It wasn’t easy being with you. Scara never really knew how to be nice, how to soften his edges, but with you, it was harder. Every time he looked at you, he felt like he needed to try better. To be more than the ruthless competitor, more than the cold, distant rival. What a stupid fleeting thought he’d once had, the idea of you two being friends.
But then, just as quickly, that competitive fire would flare up again, and he’d remember what he really wanted. He’d remember that look in your eyes when you beat him.
And suddenly, he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to hold onto the fire or let it consume him entirely.
stuck with you!
masterlist — prev | next
i hope this made sense 😭 not a lot of plot but i hope it gave some background and insight to scara and how the rivalry started
all the writing was in scaras pov! but as usual the smau portions will always go back and forth between the two
was gonna make this a flashback and present day chapter but i thot it wud be too confusing so im splitting it into two (short chapter sorry!)
i thought it would be weird to include an interview in the flashback chapter but they will be back in the next chapter!
pls comment or send me an ask if u enjoyed i need motivation 🙂↕️
comment on the MASTERLIST if i can use ur user as a fan in the au!
synopsis — after the disaster that was the live award show, where you and scaramouche got into an argument on stage after both of your groups got a tie for top artists, your guys' PR teams have been in shambles trying to scrape up your mess. that's when the idea to send you both off with some other idols to a remote location for a survival dating show to mend your public image comes up. before you know it your bags are packed and you’re on a plane to a remote island. the only obligation is you need to end up with scaramouche at the end of the show, whether you end up liking him or not doesn’t matter to your managers as long as the show’s ratings stay high. whatever you do in between to get there is up to you!
notes — guys i’m on winter break i can’t wait to do NOTHING for a month 😭🙏
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#scaramouche x reader smau#scaramouche smau#scaramouche x reader#scaramouche x yn#scaramouche x gender neutral reader#scaramouche x male reader#scaramouche headcanons#scaramouche x y/n#scaramouche x you#genshin smau#stuck with you smau
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