#there are quite a few jesus figurines

[turtlemagnum]

given that pokemon is currently the most popular media franchise of all time, there's a distinct possibility that in the modern era there exist more visual depictions of pikachu than there are of jesus christ

[parrot-with-a-mohawk]

Magical Destroyers theory 4

Back to the Parallels

So, my theories got busted, but there is still stuff that can be salvaged.

This has episode 11 spoilers, so it will be under a readmore

As I mentioned back in theory 1, there are quite a few parallels between Shobon and Otaku Hero. Now that we know Shobon's origin, the parallels are even clearer.

Now we know why Monitor head is always at a boundary. It's because the world in the anime is just a virtual one that he created with the help of Origin (it was kind of obvious that the mascot character was more than it seems, since it was weird that people just accepted it being there, along with the actual magical girls, its creations).

So, when Shobon was saying all that loathing stuff about otaku, it wasn't a reflection of Otaku Hero's thoughts, but Shobon's. He was projecting his own self-loathing onto every otaku. That means one thing:

Shobon is the protagonist, while Otaku Hero is the antagonist.

Back in his world, Shobon was a lowly, selfish, self-righteous, unwashed otaku who would blast people online all day for not liking his game. He was hiding his self-loathing behind a mask of self-entitlement. Otaku Hero is the opposite. He has overcome his struggle with that back in episode 1 and the rest of the series is him teaching his teachings to others and motivating them. He is what Shobon would become if he overcame his own struggles in his own world and improving himself as a person, instead of hiding in his bubble (in this case, his game). OH is Shobon's foil.

Or, in other words, while Shobon is God, Otaku Hero is Jesus, if God and Jesus were against eachother instead.

Jesus imagery:

(Anarchy, where are you touching)

One more thing: notice how Otaku Hero has Origin's portrait on his shirt, showing that Origin is the real mastermind and probably created Otaku Hero as Shobon's foil, so the game has a meta plot, fit for a god's tastes in entertainment (one thing sustaining that OH is part of Shobon/Origin's world is that, while Shobon is on the boundary, OH fully submerges in the water).

As for the girls being clones, yeah. It's just that they weren't OH's figurines, but Shobon's. Or they were another reflection of Origin's creations.

[motownfiction]

silver and gold

cw: discussions of religion, specifically christianity and christmas

After he marries Sadie, Daniel brings what few Christmas traditions he and his family had into their home. The first of them, he notes, is the silver and gold tinsel to throw on every branch of the Christmas tree.

Sadie takes a handful and examines it carefully like they’re a bunch of worms.

“Remind me how you put this on the tree again?” she asks.

“Exactly how you think,” Daniel says. “You put on one strand at a time.”

“You don’t just throw it?”

“No, you don’t throw it. Why would you throw it?”

“I dunno. It seems like that would be a lot more fun than just putting on one at a time like I have all year.”

Daniel holds back a laugh. He wonders if Sadie knows just how impatient she really is … just how desperate she is to get on with life, to find out what happens next, to enjoy it for what it is. He wonders if she’ll ever know that’s why he’s always been in love with her. Maybe he’ll tell her soon. Maybe she’ll believe him. Either way, she’s less than thrilled about the tinsel.

“You’ll get used to it,” Daniel says. “Plus, I’ll even let you sing your favorite Christmas songs. The real ones and the sarcastic one.”

Sadie’s eyes light up just a little bit. Daniel suppresses another laugh. She really isn’t kidding when she says she gets joy out of the little things, he thinks. And how lucky he is that it’s always been true.

“Oh, can I start with the sarcastic one?” Sadie asks.

“You can start wherever you want,” Daniel says. “Except you know I wish your sarcastic pick wasn’t on Elvis’s Christmas Album. You know what that record means to me.”

“Yeah, I do. But you know how much ‘Here Comes Santa Claus’ makes me laugh. You’re having a great time, listening to a secular Christmas song, when … bam! ‘Santa knows that we’re God’s children.’ Out of nowhere. It’s the musical equivalent of that figurine your mom puts out where Santa kneels in front of baby Jesus in the manger. It makes me laugh!”

Daniel bites his lip. He knows if he laughs, his mother will somehow find out. But damn, if Sadie isn’t funny. Damn, if Sadie isn’t more than what she gives herself credit. Daniel wraps his arm around her waist and hopes she knows what he means.

Then again, of course she knows what he means.

Nobody else has ever been quite so good at reading Daniel’s silences.

“You really wanna put this tinsel on the tree?” Sadie asks.

Daniel sighs. He picks up his own handful and begins putting it on the tree branches one by one. He knows exactly what to say, but it’s too hard to look her in the eye, even if she is Sadie.

“Yeah,” he says. “I really do. I know you probably think it’s stupid.”

“Not stupid,” Sadie interrupts. “Time-consuming, sure. But not stupid.”

Daniel shrugs.

“Either way,” he says. “I feel like … I feel like I gotta have this stuff on my tree. Because of, you know … because of my mom. The Christmas tree was pretty much the only thing my dad never tried to control. Mostly because he didn’t care, and it made him look good to have a Christmas tree in his living room all that time. So my mom got to do whatever she wanted. And she wanted tinsel. It just … it always made her so happy. You saw the look on her face when she’d put it up. So I wanna put it up, too. I want her to know … I dunno, I guess I want her to know it made a difference.”

Daniel reaches forward to hang another piece of tinsel on the tree. He feels Sadie’s lips on his cheek instead.

“You could’ve told me that before, you know,” she says. “Then I would have insisted.”

Daniel smiles.

“Even if it’s one at a time?” he asks.

Sadie grins and takes a piece of tinsel from the handful in her right grasp. Carefully, she places a single strand on a branch in the middle of the tree.

“Especially if it’s one at a time.”

[zydrateacademy]

Current Activities in ESO #6

Had to dig for this one. Like Warframe, my last ESO related post was way back in 2014.

My #2 post states my own brother dropped 95$ on the game. 2014 was before I ever ever employed. Jesus.

The origins of Dibbe are revealed. I do remember her still being a dark elf, I still have a screenshot of her as a level 46 being stuck in Coldharbor which eventually drew me away from the game for years after. (I didn't know the guy I had to talk to was just hanging out in the Fighter's Guild there). I've had a pale argonian before on previous games but they were named differently.

Ancient Dibbe. She's hideous!

My number 5 post basically precedes me quitting the game. Couldn't find my #1 or #4 post.

All of that long before the One Tamriel update. Came back to the game some time ago and all of my problems are basically gone. Leveling still feels just a tad sluggish. 3-10 are usually pretty easy but up into the 40's feels like a slog. Generally one of my better methods is counter to what I usually do on MMO's and I level up as a tank or healer for quicker dungeon queues and just bank on that chunk of experience at the end of them.

After becoming unemployed again I will say that my lack of the craftbag drew me away from the game for a long time. However I've developed something of a system regarding that. I am still painfully selling off some of the harder-to-get materials like runes, but I'm collecting stacks of the more common stuff in my bank. Presumeably to be sold on a guild trader at a later occasion. That way I can still dismantle stuff and it will have a purpose later.

My gaming loop has mostly revolved around collecting decent sets for my various alts. I'm not good at making gold passively, mostly just selling motifs that I get randomly. I keep being told that writs are the moneymaker but that's only a few grand at a time. I wonder if they refer to those master writ you get as rewards sometimes because those typically sell well if you're lucky to get the ones that reward a lot of vouchers. But those aren't guaranteed either.

Dib, my main, is on the cusp of crafting mastery so generally she can craft a couple of decent sets for fresh alts but crafting sets are usually for the beginning. Overland and dungeon sets tend to be improved, so part of my gaming loop is the slow grind of transmutation stones so I can make shit there as well. However a big hurdle there now is without my subscription, I'm now locked out of 80% of the DLC dungeons. I have a few, but I thought dungeons came with the zones that they were released with. I was incorrect. Turns out, ESO content is released quarterly. So I've bought a few zones (I'm missing the Reach which makes me sad because I love that zone and Murkmire, which I don't have much of an opinion on but now I can't make the grave-stake set which I've had fun with in the past).

And I certainly need to keep playing the game because if I run out of gold, it usually means I can't outfit my characters! Transmogging doesn't cost much but still. Gold doesn't make itself.

And then I spend my nights roleplaying. I feel the cusp of a sort of golden age of roleplay for me personally, especially regarding my main girl Dib. I've recently developed a "radiant" quest system. Around 8 of my houses are decorated and can be used for various stealth activities. For most of them (I lose out on decor slots without a sub) I can place a variety of those Precursor dummies, little bland robots that can act as like DnD figurines to represent npc's and enemies (not to mention a few houseguests, I can have up to like 15 npc placements if the decor slots allow). I've put this in practice twice now with a few different people and it's really fun. For the smaller homes it also doesn't even take very long, so it can be used for a thief-to-thief RP meet and greet.

I joined the OG <The Thieves Guild>, a player has owned that tag since 2016 but they're recently staging a revival. It still has a pretty small core right now, about four to five of the same faces have attended the last few events.

I generally, absolutely, detest tavern RP as a general rule but I will resort to it when I'm bored or want to watch a podcast or streamer on the side. However a few nights ago a marshland tavern was opened up in Blackwood, where Dib got to meet a lot of her own kind for once.

As an aside: Not that Argonians don't frequent the current RP hub in Evermore, but I spend most of my time in Evermore wallflowering with nobody deeming my character interesting enough to approach. That or the fact that they're all usually up their own asses to greet newcomers. I had Dib try to contribute to a "never have I ever" and she was never directly replied to once. It felt like four people had me on ignore for no reason.

But in Blackwood, everything felt pretty organic. I dressed Dib down from her usual shady attire from this;

To the more approachable this;

So either she was more approachable or the energy of the room let to my own Dib having more incentive to interact. A friend even came along and instead of being attached to the hip we would interact, break off to mingle, swing back to each other, and break off again. Like a real party! There was one particular player whom I didn't know very well who seemed to attach herself to Dib's side but it didn't detract too much. It was a great night. Dib is pretty sure she almost got jumped by a couple of Khajiit because she openly purchased a tome of daedric lore right there in the open. She detracted an imperial priest's claim that she is so clearly a shady sneaker.

"...Charming."

I've posted that around in some discords I'm in but I can't help it. I almost died laughing at my computer. I'm even unclear if he bought it or not but she cut real close about openly admitting daedra worship (she's a Nocturnal simp) but I feel like she managed to pull way from it.

While unemployed I'm generally making an effort to pop in relevant RP events I see scheduled in the various discords I'm in. And I do say relevant. I almost attended a pet show, I wanted to bring a small guar that Dibbe named "Lump" and would emote the fact that there was nothing special about it and that she likely just picked it out of a field somewhere. "This is lump he's wonderful" (this Guar isn't special at all). I decided to go for some other open RP in someone's household. I acquired secondhand knowledge that there was no "show" to begin with. People just brought along pets and everyone just walked around to talk about them. Would still have been funny to have Dibbe and Lump just hanging out in the corner somewhere.

Anyway I've been working on this post for an hour with Dib waiting for me in the background to do a Jester Festival quest.

[beautifulnrd]

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: Vintage MCM Mary Baby Jesus Blue Ceramic Figurine Christian Religious Décor.

[lady-lycany]

I- okay, this just made my night :'3

Me and my family are Christians, but not like the type who goes into church to proof our belief, prays a lot or follows all beliefs in the Christian religion, cuz some things doesn't align with our experiences (for example, my bestie is a typical Christian and I know from her, that they don't believe in the existence of ghosts. Meanwhile, my family- me included- had already quite a lot interactions with em. Not all were nice and we're all scaredy cats, so we do our best to NOT have interactions with them, that doesn't mean tho, that we can stop them :') xD and yea, I definitely had a traumatic ghost moment in my life, but that's not the topic rn lol), but my mom for example, has a pretty strong bond to Jesus and he spoke already to her and I- well, I'm more connected with angels I'd say, cuz I remember, that when I was still a toddler, I saw a white, blurry figurine standing on the end of my bed. And I had some near death experiences (4-5 times), so it's really a wonder that I'm still there. I never could really explain it, but because of that, I'm VERY convinced, that I don't have to fear for my life or that, when I do "dangerous" things, that something life threatening could happen to me. Cuz after everything, I've been through, I'm sure that my life has a purpose, that I haven't fulfilled yet AND for years now, I have deep down the strong feeling that, at the end, everything will turn out well for me. Idk what will happen with me and my life in the future, I'm sure there will be tough times, but as I said, there's also this deep trust and belief, that at some point, my life will be just as I wish it to be. Blablabla long story short-

For almost 10 Years, I almost look daily at the clock around 10:22pm (aka. 22:22)... It started when I was at my lowest point in life, so I was always worried, that this was a bad omen. But it still happens almost daily and my opinion has changed about it, being a bad sign. And not too long ago, I started to see the time 4:44am also more frequently.

Idk why I never thought about googling these numbers earlier but holy frick, I was mindblown when I literally read everything, that I just wrote about. The thing, that I'll have a happy future and that there are angels, that wanna tell me that they're here for me and take care of me. And ngl that made me so happy, cuz a few hours ago, I felt horrible and left alone again, and then the time 4:44am appeared and to read, that it's a sign from someone, that wants me to know, that they're there for me was just- 😭😭❤ the sweetest thing ever. I was like "Eric? Alan? Is that you guys?🥺🥺"

I thought about this also for a while now and am wondering, when I have my deep talks with Eric, and he suddenly has the perfect responds, I would've never come up with by myself, if its like an angel, planting it's words in my head, if you know what I mean. That Eric and Alan really are in some sort of way like my angels. <3

Enough Blabbering, I know that no one will probably read that so it's more an entry for me but rjrjdjdndj

[bcbdrums]

Drakgo in December! #28

Read on:  FFn     AO3

------------------------------

28. Bells

December 25, 2006

"Church?" Shego asked for the third time as she stood with arms crossed, leaning against the sideboard in the hall.

"For the last time, it will make Mother happy," Drakken hissed, glancing around for the red-haired woman as he wrapped his scarf around his neck. "Please, Shego, it's been a perfect Christmas!"

He was gone again, off to find a glove which had somehow been lost and that he'd been searching for for the last half hour, while Shego had been ready to brave the elements despite wanting to stay curled up with him on the sofa. Or perhaps escape back to his bedroom upstairs. But, it was a day of traditions, after all.

She had never been to a church. Or at least if she had, it was before the comet and she had no memory of it. She had a feeling of unease about the whole thing, even though she had no idea what to expect. Just something inside of her told her she couldn't possibly belong.

"You sure they won't burn me at the stake?" Shego hissed when Drakken rushed by again.

His only response was to roll his eyes as he continued his frantic search, and Shego shook her head. But she straightened abruptly in the next moment as Mama Lipsky entered the hall.

"Oh, be careful dear! The Nativity scene," the older woman said, and Shego turned to see that her hair had knocked over a tiny donkey figurine among the decorations on the sideboard.

She watched as Mama Lipsky rearranged all of the small figures just slightly, lingering on the manger with the baby.

"I used to scold Drew for playing with all of the decorations when he was a boy," the woman said. "Oh, I do miss the sound of a child playing around the house!"

Shego lifted a single brow as Mama Lipsky turned and looked at her, holding the manger for a moment before setting it back in the scene. Before Shego could quite figure out what was in the woman's head, she'd started toward the door where Drakken was buttoning his coat.

"Oh Drew, you left your glove in the living room," she said, waving the missing item. "And don't make that face, it's not very attractive."

Shego smirked as Drakken plastered on a grin after his grimace and took the offered glove.

"Th-Thank you, Mother! Shego...ready to go?" he asked hesitantly, keeping the forced smile.

She didn't say a word, but nodded and joined the family by the door.

There was a different feeling in the icy air that morning, Shego couldn't help but acknowledge, as they entered the courtyard of the old New England church. People were more cheerful, the conversations all bright and bubbly as she watched people hugging each other and children laughing as they played in the snow. But all of that was eclipsed in a moment as the sound of just a few bells that had beckoned them for miles on their walk grew into a cacophony.

Shego paused, and her eyes traveled up the stone tower that contained the source of the sound. It was powerful and beautiful, seeming to speak words that were in a secret language that one would need the key to understand. Or perhaps a lifetime.

"Oh, that one's pretty too," the voice of Mama Lipsky pulled Shego's attention back to ground level, and she followed the woman's pointing to a life-size Nativity scene in the snow on the church lawn. Some children were playing nearby and one had climbed on the back of one of the cows. Shego watched as the child's mother pulled him away and quietly scolded him, by her expression.

Drakken leaned over to Shego and whispered in her ear, "Eddie tried that once."

Shego snorted, but before she could comment Mama Lipsky was talking again.

"They did such a good job on that figure of the baby Jesus. Oh, it reminds me of when Drew was a baby! It would be so nice to have a baby around the house again...don't you agree, Shego?"

"L-Let's hurry inside Mother," Drakken said, rushing around to grab the woman's arm and usher her forward through the snow. "We want to make sure to get good seats!"

Shego was blinking and attempting to process what had just happened, but before she could do so there was suddenly a little girl standing in front of her, smiling. She took a breath to speak, though she wasn't sure what to say. However the child spoke first.

"You're green!" the girl exclaimed, a broad, innocent smile on her face.

"Yeah," was all Shego managed. She was several years out of practice of interacting with kids.

"Green's my favorite color!" the girl said, and then skipped away. It was only then that Shego noticed the dark green coat the girl was wearing.

She watched as the child clearly said something to her mother about her, pointing back. Shego was blank-faced when the woman smiled at her almost apologetically before turning and leading her daughter toward the building.

"Shego!"

She startled at Drakken's voice and turned as he grabbed her hand.

"It's crowded, we need to find seats together," he continued as he pulled her along to where Mama Lipsky was waving next to the door.

Shego glanced up again at the tower as the bells continued to ring out their secret message that beckoned, and felt some of her disquiet fade. It was Christmas day. It had been wonderful from the moment she woke to the smell of mulled cider in the kitchen, and for every moment after. There was no reason that should change.

She quickened her step to catch up to Drakken and placed a brief kiss on his chilled cheek. He grinned at her as he blushed, and then he leaned down to whisper.

"And don't worry, just ignore my mother's hints," he said.

"...What?"

[floralseokjin]

final sleigh drabble #2

❛ it’s Christmas day night...❜

original oneshot here // drabble index here

kim seokjin x reader smut  4,179 words 

It was Christmas Day night. You’d spent most of yesterday and today at Ana’s parents’ house. It was different to how your own family celebrated the occasion but lovely, nonetheless. Her family always made you feel welcome, no matter the instance, and you were really grateful that they’d let you spend Christmas with them, like you’d already said, because your parents were spending the holiday season abroad. 

Now, just gone eight, you and Ana were getting out of an Uber outside a familiar house. Seokjin and Yoongi’s. You hadn’t seen your co-worker, since the weekend. The weekend of nonstop sex. You’d only parted because he had a train to catch, promising his mom he’d visit for a few of days before Christmas Eve. The sex had been so good it had taken him a while to remember said plans actually, and when he had, he’d unbelievably tried getting out of them just so he could stay and fuck you even more. 

“You want to ditch your mom to continue getting your dick wet?” You asked him with severe judgment, both of you naked in your bed. It was Sunday morning. Yes, that was correct. He’d stayed over practically 48 hours nailing you over and over again. And then some. 

“Don’t say it like that,” he whined, feeling instantly guilty. “I just don’t want to leave you. I’m having too much fun.” 

“We can still have fun when you get back.” You murmured suggestively, running a hand down his chest. You were not ready to give this all up quite yet… 

With a raised eyebrow, he seemed intrigued. “Even more fun than right now?” 

“We can try.” 

You hadn’t known if it was possible, the weekend had been very fun to say the least, but who knew. You’d definitely give it your all... 

You’d spent the last few days messaging each other sporadically, but there hadn’t been too much conversation. You mean, you’d never talked a lot before the sex, so why would you start after it? But seeing his face right now, as he opened the door, you practically beamed. 

“Merry Christmas, ladies,” he grinned, outstretching his arm to gesture you both to step inside. 

Admittedly, you weren’t expecting him to invite you over tonight. He’d been back since Friday but you hadn’t made plans to meet again yet so when he’d text you this afternoon, asking if you and Ana would like to come hang out with Yoongi and him, you’d been surprised. Excited, yet surprised, but obviously you’d played it cool. 

Ana had been a little reluctant. She had slept with Yoongi a couple of weeks ago after all – and hadn’t seen him since. But, obviously Seokjin had run this idea by him? They’d both decided it together, right? So it was fine. Plus, she needed to support her best friend. If she wanted you to get boned again, she needed to come! You couldn’t turn up on your own. Not that she needed much convincing after the initial unwilling... Secretly you thought she was hoping for a round two with Seokjin’s best friend... Who knew, maybe he was too... 

Ana stepped in first and as you followed Seokjin pulled out a small piece of mistletoe from behind his back. He held it up between you both, taking you by surprise. A good surprise though. “Oh,” you uttered, wasting no time in reacquainting your mouths. 

“He’s been planning this all day.” It was Yoongi’s voice, coming from somewhere ahead of you, but you both ignored him, kissing just a little longer. 

Ana scoffed. “Surely no planning was needed. It’s holding up some mistletoe.” 

“Mmm. I missed you,” Seokjin hummed, breaking away to snake an arm around your middle. 

“I missed you too,” you grinned, aware Seokjin was dialling up the amount of yuck to piss your two friends off. 

“Jesus, you guys.” Yoongi sounded like he was about to be sick. “I preferred it when she hated you.” 

Seokjin turned to the other guy, sounding vaguely annoyed. “She never hated me. It was a misunderstanding.” 

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, man,” Yoongi chuckled. “Ana, let’s leave them to it. I’ll get you a drink.” 

You watched as they walked off together, towards the kitchen. Seokjin was the first to turn back to you, an eyebrow raised. “How much do you wanna bet they end up hooking up again?”

You were both on the same wavelength. It was obvious something was going to happen. “She hogged the entire bathroom getting ready.” 

.

. 

“Have fun, you guys,” Seokjin sang as Yoongi and Ana made a less that inconspicuous exit from the living room. It was three hours later. They’d lasted well, but obviously the need to get in on again had won. 

Seokjin turned to you immediately, sat next to you on the sofa and gave you a wolfish grin. “Finally, we’re alone.” 

You were no sooner in his lap, mouth glued to his. Moving your ass a little as you broke apart for a much needed breath, you felt the familiar impression of his erection. “You’re hard already?” You raised a judgmental eyebrow. 

“Why do you sound so shocked?” He questioned indignantly. “My dick has missed you insanely.” 

“Just your dick?” 

It was a playful remark, you didn’t mean anything by it, but Seokjin lowered his gaze, giving you a small chuckle. Instead of answering he kissed you again, his tongue pushing its way inside your mouth as his hands gripped your ass and rubbed you against his groin. Instant pleasure zapped up your body and it wasn’t long before you were grinding on your own accord, fists clutching his white t-shirt, which you had to admit, outlined his chest perfectly – You’d been trying not to stare all night. 

“Do you want to go upstairs too?” He panted against your neck, teeth nipping the flesh sharply and you bit back a moan. He was already so tuned into what you liked. “I really need to fuck you.” Pulling back to get your answer he saw the look on your face. “What’s that face for?” 

“It’s turning into a sex party,” you moaned. You couldn’t all be having sex upstairs, it seemed... You couldn’t think of the word. 

“An orgy?” Seokjin wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. 

“Behave.” You needed more people to turn it into an orgy.

Seokjin’s mouth was back on your neck, kissing down your throat, to your collarbones and he sunk his teeth into the thin skin gently, causing your breath to hitch. “Well, do you wanna fuck down here?” 

His dick was so hard underneath you, you rubbed against it some more, despite your objections. “No! What if one of them catches us?” 

“Don’t be stupid. Yoongi is definitely balls deep by now.” 

You whacked his back and he yelped in surprise. “That’s my best friend you’re talking about.” 

“I didn’t say who or what he was balls deep in.”  His reply didn’t impress you and so he grumbled. “I wish I was balls deep in you right now... Don’t give me that look, it turns me on when you’re pissy.”

Unable to stop your grin, you leaned in. “You must be constantly turned on at work then.” Pressing your lips into his, you bit down on his bottom lip. His hiss soon turned into a moan – and then a whine. 

“Let’s take this upstairs. There’s a bathroom between our bedrooms. It won’t be like our headboards are hitting the wall in rhythm.” 

“Fine.” You couldn’t hold out much longer anyway, and you both made your way upstairs, yelping loudly when Seokjin slapped your ass. You glare didn’t do much to discourage him, laughing loudly as he wrapped his arms around your middle and directed you to the door to his bedroom. 

“At least they’re being considerate and playing music,” he said, the music loud enough to block any other noise going on inside Yoongi’s bedroom... Thank God. 

“I feel like I’m back at college,” you whined as you stepped inside Seokjin’s room. 

“Huh? Did you and Ana make a habit of hooking up at the same time? Hot.” 

You pushed his arm. “No.” Chuckling, he made his way to the bed, sitting on the end, but you were too preoccupied with checking out his room. It was a lot larger than you imagined, walls cream, some covered in artwork. His computer was the main attraction, multiple screens, an unnecessarily large gaming chair and some other things you weren’t familiar with, mainly character figurines. His bed cover was a grey check pattern, a throw draped over the end with a couple of cushions against the headboard. Very clean. 

“Your room’s cute,” you commented. 

“Cute?” 

“Yeah.” Turning to look at him you smiled playfully. “So, I guess this is where you jerk your dick to fantasies of me.” 

He scoffed. “I don’t need to fantasise anymore. I have memories stored away in the wank bank.” Tapping his temple with his index finger he looked more than impressed with himself. 

“Gross!” You cried. 

“Come here,” he groaned, fed up with stalling, and he leaned over and grabbed you, causing you to squeal. “Or are you just planning on being a cocktease the whole night?” The sound wasn’t like you – but Seokjin had become good at making you act in ways you weren’t used to so far... 

Which is why you found yourself on your knees for him, sucking his dick, his jeans and underwear around his ankles. “Your mouth is fucking magic,” he grunted, head falling back, his perfect, thick neck on show as you glanced up. You felt the urge to take him deeper, pushing him closer and closer to the back of your throat, ignoring any noises of reluctance it made. 

“Fuck.” Seokjin choked, his fingers running through your hair to collect it in his fists. “That’s it. Take it all.” He pushed his hips up, stuffing your mouth for a few gloriously unbearable seconds before easing up. You lifted off, half of his dick still in your mouth as you caught your breath. He looked down at you with half-lidded eyes that seemed to eat you up. “Do you like choking on my cock?” 

Nope. He was not doing this. It was infuriating what his words did to you, and you immediately swallowed him again, ignoring the way your underwear stuck to your damp skin. He was going to have a field day when he felt you... 

Gasping for air not soon after, you had no choice but to pull off him entirely, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. You were drenched in spit, so was his cock. You watched him kick off his clothing, naked from the waist down and you made moves to follow, reaching for your shirt and pulling it over your head. 

“Let me see those tits. I’ve missed them.” He murmured, and you complied, unhooking your bra to reveal yourself to him. His eyes instantly glazed over.  Confidently, you cupped the soft flesh in your palms, massaging yourself, putting on a show, and as your thumbs brushed the hardened peaks that were your nipples he practically growled. “Oh, fuck. You want to end me.” 

Laughing, you stood up, pushing your skirt off your hips, leaving you in just your tights and panties. He followed with his t-shirt, now fully naked. You’d never get enough of his body. “Come up here,” he whined. “Let me taste them.” 

Sat in his lap, you let him grope you, his mouth making out with your chest like it could kiss back. The sensation was so intense you quickly became weak at the knees and you clung to his neck, grinding against his thighs like nobody’s business. Unable to take it any longer, his hands slipped behind you, into your underwear, and he felt the silky fabric with a groan. Soon enough he was wrestling with your pantyhose again. 

“These fucking things. What the fuck. You’re doing it on purpose now.” 

“Am not,” you insisted. (Maybe you were). “I need to keep my legs warm.” With a furious tug you heard a rip and looking down you saw his damage. “Seokjin! You laddered them!” 

“Ugh. Just get them fucking off already, I need to feel you.” 

Asshole, but wet and desperate you quickly pulled then off, giving Seokjin a great view of your ass in the process. The underwear you had on had a cut-out at the top of your ass, revealing a “cleavage” of sorts. He seemed to appreciate the sight very much, giving you a playful smack and now you were very confused. Was he an ass man like you’d originally thought, or a tits guy? He was probably both. Greedy. 

You slipped the panties off too, settling back down in Seokjin’s lap, who instantly started running his fingers over your heat. You pulsed against him, desperate for some stimulation. 

“I swear to God you get wet so easily.” 

Says the guy who’d grown hard from a kiss? Okay... “Are you complaining?”

He shook his head. “Not at all. It’s stroking my ego.” 

“Your massive ego.” 

“Behave, or I won’t fuck you with my massive dick.” Okay, now he was just bragging. His smirk was annoying you. He looked way too sexy. 

You were expecting him to finger you for a bit, make sure you were stretched out enough for him, but all he did was dip his fingertips into your entrance, content with what he’d felt and then he was shuffling out from under your body to grab a condom from his bedside drawer. 

“God. I want to fuck you so much,” he muttered a few moments later, sliding the latex over his length as you securely sat on top of him again. You kissed him sloppily, letting him angle the head of his cock against your entrance. Impatiently, you pushed down, surprising yourself – and him – when you took him whole. 

You sat there, both breathing heavily as you started to adjust to him, walls clamping down like no tomorrow, which must have been torture for Seokjin, if his expression was anything to go by. 

“Shit. You got tighter,” he panted, reaching for your mouth again, trying to calm himself with kisses. You attempted to do the same, beginning to slowly grind back and forth, getting used to the full feeling. It wasn’t painful, just a little uncomfortable, but you were no longer scared of his monster cock. You’d had a fair few goes last weekend and you were now a near enough pro, so without further ado, you started moving for real. Up, until he was almost out of you and then down, slamming into him. You just about knocked the air out of Seokjin’s lungs, but he soon steeled himself, grabbing the tops of your thighs to keep you safe as you started bouncing up and down, riding his dick like it was the easiest thing in the world. In this moment, it was. 

Seokjin started groaning pretty quickly, his jaw clenched as he watched your every movement, his chest and neck patched with red. You clung to his shoulders, anchoring yourself to him as you flung yourself back. 

“Shit. Y/N!” He panicked, hands coming out to hold your lower back, afraid you were going to fall backwards off the bed. You were still sat on the edge after all, but of course he was strong enough to hold you tight, letting you lean back as far as possible to fuck yourself along his cock, the squelchy, sticky noise music to his ears. 

“Mmm. I missed this cunt so much,” he moaned. 

You wanted to tell him he was being a big baby, it had only been a few days but his vulgar words were having the desired effect on you yet again. You were like putty in his hands, especially when he started thrusting into you, meeting your movements with a thud. “I want you to cum on my dick.” 

Fuck. You were so close, his words only helping, but by now you were getting tired; out of breath and sweaty. “Seokjin—!” You moaned, voice breaking at the second syllable, and you leaned forward, collapsing into his chest. 

“Take it easy,” he murmured, hands dragging up your sweaty back. “Want me to take over?”

You grinned drunkenly. “No way, I’m enjoying myself too much.” 

Seokjin chuckled, pressing his mouth into yours. “Make yourself cum.” He whispered against you, thrusting into you still as he grabbed your ass, digging his fingers into the flesh. “You can do it, Y/N. Grind on me like you mean it. Grind all over me.” 

You listened, rutting into each one of his thrusts, holding on for dear life as your sensitive clit rubbed against his groin. You were both so sweaty and hot, your fingers sliding down his back, unable to grip on until you dug your nails into the skin. He hissed, thrusting into you harder. It seemed like Seokjin liked a little pain, too... 

“Baby, go a little faster,” he panted, kissing your neck, and you sped up, grinding into him messily, chasing your high like something possessed. You were so turned on, so sensitive, it only took a couple more minutes, a strangled cry leaving you as you tensed in his arms, your orgasm rocketing up your body.  “Ngh, fuck. Fuck.” 

Seokjin stopped his thrusts, letting you gradually come down, and soon enough your body relaxed, almost turning into goo as the pleasure warmed its way all throughout you. You lifted your head up, staring Seokjin straight in the eyes, both of you panting like crazy, and without a word he lifted you, flipping you over, your back to his mattress before he crawled over you. He wasn’t done yet – and neither were you. 

As he pushed inside you again, his hand found its way around your throat and he looked down at you carefully. “Is this okay?” 

You nodded, voice hoarse as you replied. “Yeah.” 

It wasn’t the first time he’d asked or done this – last weekend had been a lot, you still weren’t over it, and right now you were still so horny and desperate for him. You also really liked the feeling of his grip around your neck as he fucked you. 

“Fuck,” you breathed, feeling him start to thrust harder, faster, his palm tightening around your neck a little. You folded your legs at the knees and widened them, wanting him as deep as possible. 

“God, you’re so fucking hot,” he grunted, kissing your mouth in a frenzy, all tongue and teeth. His whole body was pressed into yours, pushing you into the mattress, his pelvis beginning to rub against your mound. You were still a little sensitive from your first orgasm, but you could already feel yourself a little needy for another. If he kept this up he’d have you coming again, and he knew by the way you started to meet each one of his thrusts, moans starting to slip from your throat – louder and louder. You hoped Yoongi still had his music on... 

“S-seokjin,” you stammered, hands sprawled across his back as you felt that familiar sensation again. “I’m going to–ngh–”

He moaned in reply, pushing into your harder, using his pelvis to get you off, and you held your breath, willing your orgasm to come. Your walls clenched around him, making it harder and harder for him to drag his cock inside of you, but he fought it, continuing with gritted teeth until he heard you cry out, your body stiffening under his. 

It wasn’t as strong as your last orgasm, but seemed to knock you for six, heady dizzy as you felt Seokjin kiss down your chest, slipping out of you carefully. His tongue circled one of your nipples, his hand cupping the other breast as he groaned softly. His erection bobbed against your inner thigh. 

“Coming on my cock twice. You’re amazing.” He awed, lifting his head up to smile at you. He sounded drunk. You felt drunk. 

“Well, I do try.” You joked, voice soft. 

He chuckled, and then his voice grew serious, eyes large and black, still very much turned on. “Tell me what you want, Y/N.” 

It was pretty obvious, his dick burning a hole against your leg. “Your cum.” 

His eyes widened, obviously not expecting you to be so upfront, and you took great pleasure in that. 

“Where?” He whispered. He didn’t bother to wait for your reply. “Mouth? Can I come in your mouth,” he asked. 

Your stomach dipped with urgent need, and you nodded your head rapidly. “Yeah.” 

He sat up instantly, moving to kneel over your face. He tugged the condom off, jerking himself off a couple of times before his eyes met yours. “Tongue out.” You obeyed, keeping your eyes open as the weight of his cock pressed against your tongue. “Good girl.” 

Okay, that was new. He hadn’t called you that last week, and instantly you felt your gut squeeze. You sucked the tip of his cock, eager now for him to cum in your mouth. As you did so, he started jerking himself off, eyes fluttering closed as his head lolled back, Adam’s apple bobbing slowly. His movements grew quicker, matching his breathing and then he hissed, body tensing up. 

“Fuckkk.” A couple of drops of cum landed against your tongue and you swallowed them, ready for more. You sucked him for all he was worth, your gaze never leaving his face, and even once he was done, you kept on lapping him with your tongue, digging the tip across the slit. 

He shuddered, making a strained noise and he pulled back, his cock falling out of your mouth. “Shit. I’m sensitive,” he laughed, collapsing next to you. You were both out of breath and sweaty, but wholeheartedly satisfied. 

“That’s gotta be the best yet?” You asked, grinning from ear to ear. 

“I think you may be right.” He agreed, pushing his hair out of his eyes, exposing his forehead. You wanted to reach over and kiss him, but you stopped yourself. “You were riding dick like a pornstar.” 

“Shut up,” you whined, pushing his shoulder. How embarrassing. 

Laughing at your reaction, he sat up, propping himself up with his elbow. “If you want the bathroom I have one over there.” 

You followed his thumb to a door on the right of his room. “An en suite? Very fancy.” 

Seokjin shrugged. “Yoongi has the main bathroom, so.” You didn’t move, tired more than anything, peeing could probably wait. Seokjin’s brows furrowed together. “Are you okay though?” 

“Of course,” you laughed. “I feel fricking amazing. I’ll be sad once this ends.” 

As soon as you said the words you felt funny. Seokjin looked surprised, voice low with... what was it, concern? “Who says it has to end? Do you want it to?” 

“...No,” you answered after a pause. 

Truthfully you didn’t want it to end just yet, you were enjoying yourself, you were just unsure of what was happening between the two of you... You’d  both confessed something back at the office last week but you were still uncertain what exactly it was. What had you been expecting? To fuck once and then that would be it? You liked having sex with Seokjin, it was fun, and you liked his company (most of the time). You liked him. He liked you. Maybe you didn’t need to put an expiry date on this thing. It was fine to see where it went. You didn’t need to turn it into a big deal. You didn’t need an outright answer for everything. It was fine to just live in the moment. 

“I don’t either,” Seokjin smiled, looking mildly relieved by your answer. 

“I just... when work starts back we won’t have much time to meet up like this.” 

“I’ll make time, trust me.” He kissed you then, hovering over you, lips warm and soft, a far cry from earlier, and the thought made you giggle. 

“What?” He asked bemused. 

“You know, you turn pretty demanding when you get horny.” 

He raised an eyebrow. “How so?”

“Like, bossy and all, I don’t know, domineering.” You shrugged, feeling a little awkward. “It’s hot.” 

He smiled, chuckling softly as he kissed you again, a hand cupping your face. “It’s not too much?” He murmured. 

He didn’t sound surprised by your revelation so something told you he was aware of how he acted. Which made it even hotter, to be honest. 

“I like it.” You told him, biting down on your bottom lip. 

Eyes darkening, he hummed, his gaze running down your body. “So how about I tell you to spread those gorgeous legs so I can eat dessert?” 

You repressed the urge to laugh out loud. Dessert?! He was such an idiot. “Right now?”

“Yes. Right now.” Then he paused, rubbing his nose against yours, his tone softening. “Yeah?”

With a massive grin, you spread your legs. “Be my guest.” 

A third orgasm? You weren’t going to turn that down. 

 Written 2020 - 2021.  Please refrain from posting my work elsewhere. No translations allowed. © floralseokjin 2021

[softyoongiionly]

Can I Make a Mess Now?

Jungkook’s never had sex before but, after realizing that he’s falling in love with you, he thinks he wants that to change.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Virgin! Jungkook, established relationship au, college au, smut, fluff.

Word Count: 4.8k

A/N: This is a part 2 to Will You Make a Mess Now? Please please please let me know what you think! Love you

Warnings: smut, language, 18+ only please.

Winter break never lasts long enough does it?

A few short weeks of bliss and then-

BOOM.

You’re forced out of the warm and lazy cocoon of holiday spirit and, back into the rigidity of modern education.

It’s not that you don’t enjoy your studies, it’s just that after nearly four years of exams and, group projects that never go exactly as planned; you are starting to feel burnt out.

It also doesn’t help that you spent the majority of your winter break sleeping over at your boyfriends house.

You got used to the weight of his head on your chest.

You got used to running your fingers through his hair; an act that lulled both of you to sleep.

You got used to waking up beside him every morning.

When the semester started once again, the two of you agreed that you’d reserve overnight stays to weekends only.

As encouraging as you were of each other’s success, copious amounts of alone time is a (delightful) distraction.

Especially since the two of you began exploring the boundaries of your relationship.

At the beginning of winter break, Jungkook had revealed to you that not only was he a virgin but, he’s never been touched before.

After a bit of discussion, he decided that he wanted you to change that.

And boy did you…

You still can’t get the images of him falling apart beneath the firm grasp of your hand out of your head.

It’s arguably one of the best things you’ve ever seen.

Jungkook’s room became the safe haven for exploration.

Many cold nights were spent underneath his duvet, touching on each other until things eventually got heated enough for you to take turns making eachother cum.

Happy Holidays indeed.

There was one night in particular that things got a little out of hand.

In the heat of the moment, Jungkook had torn off your t-shirt, leaving the two of you to make out in your underwear.

He positioned you on his lap with a low whine in his throat and, at the feeling of your heat pressing directly into his dick; he almost lost it right then and there.

It took everything in him to keep his hands steady.

To keep them from ripping your panties off…

However, he succeeded and although, it was painful to slow things down, he knew it was the right thing to do.

The only problem is, that night increased his desire to a level he’s never felt before.

He knows he wants you to be his first but; he’s so particular and, so sensitive to his surroundings that he wants to make sure everything is perfect.

Perfection is a concept he frequently struggles with and, although he’s lessened his standards over the years, he still finds himself reverting back to his old habits.

Losing his virginity is a big deal for him.

He can’t help that.

And because it carries so much weight, he feels the need to hold off until the moment is 100% right.

But, how does he define such a thing?

He knows he wants you.

He knows you want him.

He knows he’s falling in love with you…

So, how is a perfect moment established?

Can you plan it?

Jungkook doesn’t know but, he’s starting to believe that he can’t.

His brothers don’t understand his issues.

Seokjin’s been with his girlfriend for two years and, every time she comes to visit, he can hear her moaning through his bedroom door.

An event that continuously scars him.

Namjoon is engrossed in his studies so, he doesn’t make time for relationships.

But one time, when he was looking for his laptop, Jungkook walked in on him getting his dick sucked.

He’s still never gotten that image out of his head.

Hoseok literally attended an orgy two months ago.

Jimin’s dating his childhood sweetheart.

Taehyung stays over at the sorority house at least twice a week.

And, last but not least, Yoongi frequently walks around sporting various love bites and scratch marks after a night with his girlfriend.

Jungkook’s spoken with his hyungs’ regarding sex a few times but, it’s never a conversation he initiates.

He’s far too shy to openly speak about these things.

But from what he’s gathered, sex is top notch.

None of his brothers could think of anything that feels as good, although Yoongi did cite sleeping as a close second.

After a long week of lectures and tedious lab work, Jungkook has finally decided that he wants to lose his virginity.

Or at least…he’s ready to talk about it…

He starts off guns a blazing: he sends you a text trying to appear nonchalant despite the fact that his heart is currently pounding in his chest.

Jungkook: do you want to come over tonight? 

Jungkook: there’s a new season of that anime we started watching :)

His message does the same bit of damage on your heart because, although you two have been dating for quite some time, you still get excited at the thought of seeing him.

You: plzzz

You: this first week has killed me

You: I need to relax so bad

You: my brain cell count has dropped to dangerously low amount.

Jungkook chuckles to himself, shaking his head at your response.

Jungkook: wow

Jungkook: lower than normal???

Jungkook: that’s pretty bad jagi :/

You giggle, already gathering your toothbrush and, various other items needed for an overnight stay.

You:  I know

You: it’s a tragedy : (

Despite the playful banter between the two of you, Jungkook is furiously moving around his room, cleaning every inch of it.

He’s dusting the shelves, vacuuming his floor, rearranging his figurines on his desk.

He feels like a mad man…

Jungkook: lol you’re ridiculous

Jungkook: you can come over around 7 if you’re ready; I’m just finishing up an assignment.

Jungkook: miss you <3

Your boyfriend is literally sour patch kid.

You: miss you too 

You: falling asleep without you sucks

You: 10/10 would not recommend

Jungkook smiles, gripping his phone in his hand, a flurry of emotions stirring in his stomach.

Jesus, he really likes you…

Jungkook: stay the night then

Jungkook: I’ll make sure you sleep better tonight

He feels proud of himself.

He initiated you coming over, he’s holding a playful/flirty conversation with you, and he’s totally not freaking out at the fact that he’s going to have to tell you he’s ready to have sex.

Right?

Okay, the last part is definitely a lie but he’s just gonna go with it.

You: on my way :)

Jungkook receives this text from you roughly two hours later when he’s getting out of the shower.

He deep cleaned his bedroom, put fresh bedding on his mattress, scrubbed every inch of his body and, now he was standing in front of the mirror with nothing but a towel on his hips.

He takes time slathering lotion all over his skin, hoping that you like the vanilla-honey scent before applying a copious amount of deodorant.

He shaved in the shower, taking his time to remove the bit of hair around his crotch because it makes him feel cleaner.

Jungkook’s hair is getting longer too so, he’s been putting leave in conditioner on his ends to keep them healthy and spritzing his hair with anti-frizz serum.

After roughly 20 minutes of primping, he gets another text from you as he’s pulling on his sweat pants.

You: Here <333

Jungkook feels his stomach twist whilst reading your message.

Here goes nothing…

You’re standing outside the door of Jungkook’s house, dressed in a hoodie and a pair of leggings.

Comfy works out for you because, it requires minimal effort and, it’s also your boyfriend’s favorite look on you.

So, it’s a win win.

Given the fact that you and Jungkook usually end up fooling around, you took the time to exfoliate and shave whilst you were in the shower.

You may have also worn a new lacy red bra that had arrived in the mail earlier that day…

But, who knows?

“Yahhh there she is…”

You instantly light up as Jungkook eagerly swings open his front door, quickly pulling you into his grasp.

He smells amazing but, he feels even better and, you waste no time in pulling him close to you.

“I missed you.” You mutter into his hair

He grins, hugging you a bit tighter and, ushering you inside, “Missed you too, are you cold at all?”

Stepping through the threshold of his door, you notice that he’s freshly showered himself, his hair is damp and stringy but, it frames his face perfectly

“A little bit but, I plan on using you for warmth really soon so, I’m good.”

His hand is intertwined with yours as he leads you up to his room and, his face lights up with a smile.

“I got a new duvet on Tuesday, it’s really warm but,” He places a hand on his chest. “,you can still use me though, I missed having you here.”

Jungkook mutters the last half of his sentence, his cheeks warming up at his confession before he pushes open the bedroom door.

You don’t comment on his shyness but, it makes you smile and lean into him a little more.

His room is always clean but, the fresh scent of his disinfectant spray is slightly more pungent than normal. It isn’t a harsh smell; it’s a soft lavender cleaner that he special orders from Korea.

He absolutely hates the scent of bleach.

“It’s a nice color huh?”

Jungkook gestures to the muted grey of his new bedding, which is carefully placed over his mattress.

“I love it, it’s very you.” You smile as your eyes scan the room, “it matches your furniture really well too.”

His eyes light up, “Yeah, yeah that’s why I got it. I knew it would look good with the- um the desk and the dresser and stuff. See, I knew you’d notice that…you always notice things like that.”

Before you can respond he’s speaking again, his tone slightly uneven, “Um do you want to lay down? I know you said you were cold. I can hold you if you want-“ He grimaces at his word choice, not fully understanding why his nerves are taking over already, “not that  I don’t want to or anything. I do, I just…I know you’re cold.”

You touch your hand to his cheek, bringing his wandering eyes back to yours, “Are you ok?”

Jungkook swallows, his eyes locking with yours, “Y-Yeah, I just don’t want you to be cold…”

You’re not convinced.

Although the two of you have only been together for 6 months, you like to think you’ve gotten to know Jungkook really well. He isn’t exactly a closed book and, when he’s nervous about something, it’s fairly obvious.

“Are you suuuure?”

The question is paired with a soft kiss to his lips and, Jungkook can’t help but smile when you do, his posture relaxing slightly.

“I’m sure, I’m just happy you’re here. It was weird not seeing you all week.” He tucks a stray hair behind your ear before, pecking your lips.

Again, you’re not convinced but, you don’t want to pry.

He’ll tell you when he’s ready.

The matter of his worries is dropped and, Jungkook quickly (and neatly) pulls back the covers so, that the two of you can slip underneath them.

Moments later, you’re nestled against your boyfriend’s side, draping your arm over your stomach.

“You smell good…” You mutter against his sweater, nuzzling gently against the material.

Jungkook grins triumphantly, silently patting himself on the back for his choice of lotion.

“Thank you,” His chest vibrates with the sound of his voice, “so do you…”

With that, he tentatively raises a hand towards your hair, allowing his fingertips to brush over the top of your head.  

The anime begins playing but, you’re more focused on the way his fingers feel, as you melt into the soft fabric of his sweatshirt.

And halfway through the first episode, Jungkook’s motions are beginning to take a toll on you.

But not in the way you’d normally expect…

He’s smiling softly, admiring the way you sigh at his touch, taking time to play with the ends of your hair before massaging gently at your scalp.  

“You’re going to make me sleepy…” You mumble contently, a few minutes later and, Jungkook chuckles breathlessly beneath you.

“That’s ok; you can sleep if you need to.”  

He means it.

Jungkook had other things on his agenda but, now that you’re here, all he cares about is your comfort.  

“Don’t wanna sleep-“ You nudge your nose against his ribcage, “I missed you.”

With another chuckle, he traces his fingers over the edges of your hairline, brushing over the shell of your ear.

You can feel goosebumps rising on your skin but, it’s not intrusive or sudden, they come on slowly along with a type of comfort that only Jungkook can provide.

“I’ll be here when you wake up.” He soothes, his motions continuing over the arches of your brows before, he traces back up the expanse of your forehead. “I promise.”

You can feel yourself smile as your blinking slows, taking another deep breath whilst your body seems to melt into him.

The heaviness in your eyelids is growing despite your best efforts to warrant off your exhaustion.

You didn’t want to nap, you wanted to spend time with your boyfriend but, when he tucks his fingers beneath your hair and, begins scratching gently on your scalp, the threat of sleep becomes more prominent.

“Sleepy girl…” He teases, a fond smile on his lips as he watches your eyes finally close. His thumb brushes over your cheek, gently pinching at the skin before, returning his hand to your hair.

This warms you from the inside out and, sooner or later you can’t help but, drift off into a light sleep.

Jungkook smile grows and, he slows his movements to a stop before tugging on the duvet until it covers your shoulders.  

He decides in that moment that he really wouldn’t mind spending every night just like this; tucked under the covers, falling asleep in eachother’s arms.  

He changes the show to something you’ve already seen; he doesn’t want to watch the anime without you.  

After some time has passed, you slowly come out of your slumber, happy you’re still laying on your boyfriend’s chest.  

You peer up at Jungkook to see his brow furrowed in concentration as his gaze is locked firmly on the screen.  

A smile immediately finds it’s way onto your lips, your finger reaching out to bop him on the nose.

He jumps at first, not understanding the source of the interruption before he quickly matches your smile, ““Yah she’s awake. Did you have a good nap?” He thumbs over your cheek once more and, you’re overcome by the urge to press a kiss against his lips

He’s willing and able to accept it.

His hands come up to hold you against him and, he slowly begins to move his lips against yours

“Mhm...”

His nose wrinkles with the joy on his face as he presses more kisses to your lips.

“I’m sorry I fell asleep, I just haven’t been getting to bed on time this week...”

An adorable pout comes over his mouth, “Don’t be sorry, I’m glad you were able to get some rest. It’s not late or anything.”

It’s well past sunset but, Jungkook’s vanilla cake candle is providing enough light to illuminate the details of your boyfriends face.  

You kiss him again, just because he’s cute and you can, “What did you do while I was out?”

His head reclines against his pillow again but, he tugs you closer, ensuring that you remain against him.

“I watched a few episodes of Naruto...” He admits, “I’ve seen it a million times but, I never get tired of it.”

Your arms drape over his shoulders as the upper half of your body rests over his chest. The wispy ends of his black hair are too cute to resist so you absentmindedly toy with them as you respond,

“I get it, I have a few different shows that I’m like that with; I swear I’ve seen The Office so many times I could quote it in my sleep.”  

A half smirk curves on the end of his mouth, “Yeah that’s a good one too, Jin hyung watches that show all the time.”

You giggle, tucking a bit of hair behind his ear, “Ah that explains a lot actually, Jin and Michael Scott have a lot in common.”

He chuckles at that, nodding in agreement, leaning his head against your hand.

“Which character do you think you are?”

You purse your lips, mulling it over, your eyes narrowing in thought, “Hmmm that’s a tough one cause like- I wanna say Kelly because, she’s amazing but in reality, I’m probably more of a Kevin.”

Jungkook’s smirk grows, “Isn’t that the guy who dropped his chili all over the place?

With a dramatic sigh, you nod, “God, I’ve never related to anyone more in my entire life...”

A full belly laugh comes from your boyfriends pretty mouth, his body trembling beneath you as he shakes his head.

It’s one of your favorite sounds, especially when it gets all high pitched like it is now.

“Jagi you aren’t Kevin...” He insists, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye, “You are cooler than him.”

“You’re just saying that because you see the best side of me; in reality I am 100% Kevin.” You giggle, tucking more hair behind his other ear.

He still chuckles, shaking his head before nodding to you, “Who do you think I am?”

This definitely gets your brain going.

“I’m leaning towards Jim, you guys have a lot in common.” You nod as you continue to think about their similarities, “Yeah, you both have the same sense of humor and, even though you’re more sexy in an obvious way, you both have the same kind of sexiness?? If that makes sense?? But, you’re definitely hotter than Jim.”

You force your train of thought away from the office- style fantasy that pops into your head as Jungkook feels something stir deep in his gut.

“You think I’m sexy?”

You can’t help but laugh at the surprised look on his face, you swear you’ll never understand how Jungkook doesn’t see how hot he is.

“Duh.” You seal your response with a kiss but, Jungkook surprises you by sitting up and tugging you onto his lap.

He chuckles at the squeal that leaves your lips but, he carries on kissing you, his hands sliding up your outer thighs.

You don’t know what prompts his motions but, you’re not really in the mood to ask.

You’d much rather sit on your boyfriend’s lap and, make out with him.

“Can you-” He whispers against your lips, slightly breathless, “Can you say it?”

Your eyes flutter open to catch the shyness in his, “Can I say what?”

Warmth floods the apples of his cheeks, “Can you say that you think I’m sexy?”

A smirk teases the corners of your mouth and, tentatively you roll your hips against his.

“Are you trying to get hard Jungkook?”

You can hear him gulp, his eyes widening a bit before he nods.

With a smirk still on your lips, you tilt his head back, moving your fingers through his hair as you slowly begin placing kisses up the side of his neck.

His breathing picks up and, god help him, he immediately feels his dick hardening in his sweats.  

Jungkook’s neck is a sensitive area and, you know exactly where his weak spots are.

As you reach the lobe of his ear, you feel his grip tighten on your hips, his mouth parted slightly to make way for his shaky breath.  

“Jungkook?” You whisper in his ear, biting your lip as you see him visibly shiver beneath you.

“Yeah?”

“I think you’re sexy.”  

You nibble on his ear before quickly reuniting your lips, your hands sliding underneath his sweater.

His skin is so soft, so warm beneath your fingertips and, there is a large part of you that wishes you could spend hours just touching and kissing your boyfriend’s body.

Jungkook is eagerly reciprocating your kiss whilst his hands slowly move back up the outsides of your thighs.

His plan to get hard definitely worked because, you can feel him poking against your hips and, you’re already thinking of all the different ways you can make him cum.

“Did you get hard for me?” You whisper against his swollen lips, nudging his nose

Instantly he nods, his hands tugging the hem of your hoodie.

You take the hint, pulling back from him in order to remove it.  

Your plan is to continue kissing him of course but, as Jungkook spots the fire-red lace cups supporting the swells of your breasts, he lets out a tortured sigh.

“Is that new?” He swallows thickly, biting his bottom lip, allowing his hands to trail up your hips before securing themselves against your waist.

All you do is nod, sticking your chest out a bit and, encouraging him to keep touching you.

Jungkook leans in, dragging the tip of his nose between your breasts, inhaling when he reaches the space between your color bones.

“Did you wear this for me?”

His voice is ragged but, it’s deeper than normal, due to the arousal coating his tone.

“I wanted to look pretty for you.” You whisper, running your fingers through his hair.

You can feel him smile against your chest, his wet lips trailing back to tops of the bra, “You’re always pretty but this-” He grows bolder, biting softly at your breast, “this is torture”

A giggle bubbles past your lips, as you roll down against him once more.

“Jagi I-” The sensation of pleasure that toys with his body acts like a truth serum and, in an act of desperation that he definitely didn’t plan, a confession tumbles from his mouth, “I want you.”

But you don’t quite catch his drift, still rocking slowly against him, arousal slowly beginning to unravel you, “I want you too.”

No like,” He pulls away, his eyes glazed over with desire as they lock onto yours, “I want to be inside of you...”

It’s like a punch to the gut really, the way your boyfriend’s voice seems to quake under the weight of his admission.

You cup his cheek, “Really? Are you sure?”

He nods eagerly, licking his lips before turning to press a kiss to the inside of your wrist, “I want you so bad...”  

You’re quick to capture his lips then, kissing into him with more fervor than you ever have.  

"Can you do it for us Noona?” He croons into your mouth, his eyes darkened with lust as they plead with yours.

A nod is all you can manage at his devasting way of asking you to ride him.

For the first time...

You’re pulling off his sweater, securing your lips to his once more, kissing on them as you lean him back against the pillows.

Your bottoms are removed, leaving you completely naked as you tug his sweats down his legs.

Jungkook’s erection looks painful and, you feel yourself ache at the thought of finally being able to sit on it.

As you sit astride him once more, you lean down to press a kiss between his eyes before trailing your lips down the bridge of his nose to hover over his mouth.

He looks a little emotional, staring up at you as if you hung the moon just for him.

And you would, you’d do anything for him.

“Are you ready baby?” You whisper

He takes a deep and unstable breath through his nose but, gives you a nod anyway as he exhales through his mouth.

Right as you start lining him up with your entrance, Jungkook cups your cheek, his hand clammed up due to his nerves.

“Jagi?” He croaks

You kiss his hand gently, reassurance in your eyes, “Yeah?”

“G-Go slow please...”

You nod, “Of course, tell me if you want to stop at any point ok?”

He returns your nod before, letting out another breath as his head returns to his pillows.

Slowly but surely, you begin sheathing him in your heat, going as slow as possible so he can feel everything.

His body seems to freeze as you sink down on him, his hands tightening on your hips before a gasp leaves his throat.

Jungkook is quite sure he’s in heaven.

That’s the only explanation for the intense feelings of pleasure swimming through his body. He’s never felt anything so hot, so tight-  

So fucking good.

He’s going to lose his mind.  

With wide eyes, he stares up at you in awe, his lips parted as the length of his dick is fully inside of you.

You’re not fairing too well either because, Jungkook fills you up perfectly, nudging against the spot within you that makes your head spin.

“Is that ok?”

“ ‘ss so good...”  His voice is slurred as his hips jerk beneath you, sending a wave of pleasure through your core.

Biting your lip, you thumb his cheek, trying to hold it together, “Can I ride you now?”

You’re asking because, you want to make sure he’s prepared.

You know this isn’t going to last long but, you still want to blow his mind.

“I’m already so close jagi...I’m sorry...” He chokes on the end of his sentence when you start a pace on his dick, “Oh fu- oh my god...”

“Shh...don’t be sorry, you’re doing so good. You cum whenever you need to ok?”  

“Ah- Y/N...”  

His beautiful features are screwed up in pleasure, his hands falling off your hips because, he literally doesn’t have the strength to hold on at this point.

Jungkook’s breathing is growing rapid, as his eyes flit to where you’re connected, “Jagi I’m- I’m really inside...I’m really inside of you...” He marvels, his voice weak with emotion as his hips begin to meet yours.  

“You feel so good inside of me.” You assure him, increasing your pace which prompts his eyes to roll back momentarily.

“Will you kiss me? Please? I wanna kiss you when I cum...and I’m-” His eyes re-focus but, it doesn’t last long as you lean forward to brace your hands on either side of his head, “Jagi I’m gonna cum already...I’m gonna cum so hard. Oh sh- shit...”

You want every wish of his to come true.

You lean down to connect your lips, your hips moving faster and faster, wanting him to cum harder than he ever has in his entire life.

He whimpers into your mouth as his sweaty hands hold you tightly against his body.

“It’s...fuck I’m sorry, I’m sor- I'm cumming.” He chokes out, his grip tightening intensely as his hips weakly jerk with the force of his release.

He says your name as he cums inside of you, trying his best to kiss you properly but, it’s wet and sloppy.

You don’t care though, you ride him through his orgasm, keeping your lips connected.

“There you go, cum for me baby...” You coo, kissing all over his face as the pleasure continues to wrack his senses.

Jungkook knows his never cum harder in his life and, by the time his orgasm settles down, he’s properly spent.

He doesn’t completely register the feeling of you sliding off of him as his whole body is alight with tingles.

You make sure to clean him up, pressing gentle kisses to his stomach as you do.

You didn’t cum this time and, to be honest, it doesn’t really matter.

What you’ve both just experienced was too intimate to measure and, orgasms weren’t really the point this time.

Tucking into your boyfriend’s body you bring him close, tugging the duvet over his shoulders this time...

“Hi” He whispers, tucking his face shyly into your neck, his breathing not fully recovered.

“Hi you...”  

With a smile on your mouth, you press a kiss to his head, holding him tightly to you.

He kisses your chest, feeling ridiculous at how shy he suddenly feels, “I think-” He stops himself to peek up at you, a bit of moisture in his eyes, “I think I’m falling for you.”

Your heart throbs at his confession, kissing his lips once more before whispering, “I think I am too.”

Jungkook knows you didn’t finish and, he plans on addressing that when he settles down but right now, all he can do is hold you.

He thinks he’s finally figured it out:

You can’t plan a perfect moment because, perfection just doesn’t exist.

But as along as he’s with you, it doesn’t really matter.

[zuffer-weird-girl]

May i request for overhaul just being vulnerable because of the first time he felt "threatened" by somebody trying to steal angel away? And he feels really terrible about it? (Even if he took care of the issue...the person- already?) You may decline! Thankyou

He wasn't the best to be involved with.

Heck, he would be a hypocrite if he deny such a thing. He is arrogant, cold and capable of kill someone if they accidentaly bumo onto him. Not even mentioning the sociopath part of his persona.

Resume. He is a mess of a man. Sometimes he even question it if you were actually sane to still be with him. Say you loved him for who he is and stay by his side even on his worsts moments where he knows he is an absolute asshole if it let him.

He knew you deserved better. He knew it.... yet his selfishness was way bigger than his common sense; he didn't wanted to lose one of the only good things on his fucked up life.

He was too possesive.

Yet seing you there... smilling and actually laughing at that man's words and gestures made his stomach turn into a knot as he gripped on his glass a little bit tighter as he stared at the scene with nonchalant expression.

"Such a beautiful person like yourself involved with us? A bunch of yakusas? Pardon but I mistook you with actual royalty." The brunette haired man spoke as you giggled and waved him off.

"Please, this is beyond exaggerating sir!"

"I beg your kindness to call me Harishima. It would be a blessing to hear my name be spoken by such a sweet angel's voice."

Angel? Angel... that was his nickname for you. How dare he-

"Shit! You're okay Overhaul?" He heard Chrono's blvoice and he only let out a confused noise before looking at his own hand... despite the gloves on, that was sign of his blood dropping on the floor along with the remains of what used to be a glass.

He didn't even used his quirk to do that... impressive. His subconscious spoke louder this time.

He merely grabbed a napkin and started to wipe it off until he heard your voice. He stared down and found you with wide worried eyes directioners at his injury as his chest somehow fluttered in relief.

Your attention was on him. You carried about him.

"What happened?!" You took the napkin out of his hand and sweetly wipe while holding his hand on yours... many were shock that Overhaul didn't killed you right there for touching him without permission.

No. The man was staring down at you like it was not a big deal. Letting you treat his wound as you asked for anyone for some bandages.

The worry in your eyes were genuine... you didn't had the same look towards that filth.

"Kai I think we should go to-"

"Oh my." The man you were speaking to appeared and dares to put a hand on your shoulder "Mister we should get to the hospital. I can take both you and this lovely friend of yours there by my car."

"Would you really do that?" You asked in astonishement and relief as the man nodded with a smile.

His eye twitched at the sign. Snatching his hand back he took off his gloves and let it fall to the ground as he used hsi quirk on his own hand. Poker face present with a tinge of hate and wish to kill as he stared Harishima on the eyes.

"As you can see-" his hand returned back to normal "I dont need this stupid charity of yours. And I command you to stop this disgusting flirting on my partner. Unless of course you dont treasure your life this much." He narrowed his eyes at the quivering man before telling you to follow him since he was done of this reunion.

You looked at Hari whose shrugged before quickly apologizing to Harishima and going after your fuming boyfriend.

He could hear your footsteps after him but he didn't even dared to look behind his shoulder or to even spoke one single word. On the car it held such a tension atmosphere that could be snapped by a freacking needle.

Now, back to the safety of you guys shared room, you looked at your boyfriend changing out of his clothes before gulping and have thhe courage to speak.

"I thought we were suppose to get out of there at 10? Is still barely 9 p.m Kai..."

He stop mid track on folding his shirt. Golden eyes looking slowly at your figurine before they retreated, as well as his actions of searching something to wear at night after taking a shower.

"If you wished to pass time with that filth then you should had at least said on my face."

The time your ears got his sentence you widened your eyes and stared at him for solid minutes in shock as he refused to lock gazes once again.

"What are you... talking about?" You giggled "Wait... no. Kai you were-! Oh!!!" your giggles got into a point you were laughing, back on the bed as Chisaki arched one eyebrow up as one of his eye also twitched in anger.

Making fun of him after what happened. You were lucky enough he treasured you or else you would be around on all room and being cleaned out of it by Chronostasis.

"Quiet." He commanded and you only laughed harder, giggling when he grabbed on your shoulder and forced you to look at the murderous glare he had on his face as you smirked up at him.

"You were jealous of Harishim-"

"Spoke his entire name. Go on." He narrowed his eyes down at you and clenched his grip on warning "I dare you to do it."

Smilling up at him you giggled one last time.

"I lost count of how many times you got jealous hun." You giggled more before you stopped when he let your shoulder go, turning his back to you "Kai..?"

"... you know dearest. That... you're free to go. There's no need to remain here against your own will." That was the last thing he said before getting inside the shower, leaving you at the point of your heart to burst out of your chest.

What was he talking about?

After some torturing minutes he got out of the shower and widened his eyes at seing you, boucing your leg still waiting for him but soon they got back to normal.

"I thought you would be gone by now." He spoke nonchantly as you hesitantly looked up at him.

"Do you want me to?" His heart did a weird thing, but it seemed like it had contracted at seing your worry and how afraid you seemed to be.

"If it is against your own will and you're lying then yes." He said in the most cold tone of voice possible until you got up to look up at him, inches apart from his body.

"Why would I pretend something like that? We both know I cant even hide you that I ate a candy bar without you looking!"

"... what I am saying is..." he sighed, his pride not even allowing him to look at your eyes "I don't think I am the most suitable person to you. After all you're just so... pure."

You blinked up at him in surprise and shock... he wasn't only jealous this time, but insecure. Heavens, when was the time you ever saw your Chisaki Kai, OVERHAUL, insecure?!

"This is new..." you mumbled, finally catching his attention enough for him to look at you "Kai, you treat me well enough. Jesus you spoil me rootless since I almost beg you to not do it!"

"Is not a matter of money. Is a matter of treatment. I should at least... give enough of affection for you to not go to other males seeking for such things." He looked away, scratching the back of his neck until he let out a gasp at you hugging him tightly.

"You idiot." He narrowed his gaze at you who had your head on his chest "I couldn't ever seek attention from other guys since I have you. Germophobic and all of your package." You looked up at him as he stood with his arms out awkwardly.

"Yet you seemed quite fond of that sick-"

"Is a matter of good education. I dont even know if you noticed but everytime he tried touching me I brushed off. Just at that time when he was suggesting to take you on a hospital!"

His gaze slowly softened.

"You are the only one for my eyes dammit! I love you for you Chisaki! Sure, our affectionate touches might be rare but that's what make it so special... and you're getting better on your mysophobia! Geez last time there was a dirt on the floor instead of wanting to kill someone you went there and clean it yourself!"

"That was simply because no one else can clean something properly." He brushed it off as you again rested your head on his chest with a sigh.

"Trust me at least once Kai..." you mumbled until you gasped when you felt him hugging you back slowly with one arm as the other was occupied on petting your head.

"I dont trust on others... thinking they can take what is mine away. The wish of killing them is huge, yet I cant deny that some of them could treat you at least better."

"That's not true idiot!" You gasped when he flipped your head and pouting up at him as he looked down at you with a soft look yet lips pressed onto a thin line as always.

"You are insufferable sometimes you know that." He sighed with closed yes, detaching his arms away from you.

"And you were jealous of me some hours ago." You smiled at him "tsking" at your words and then you peeked his cheek, making him gag and press his hand on the area where your lips met his skin.

"... go to sleep already will you." He said before muttering some excuse to leave as you giggled at his attitude.

He gave only a few minutes, enough for you to sleep as he come back to the bedroom and saw you on the bed... his mind told him something and his heart another.

He decided to be bold this time. Getting behind your back and slowly putting his arms at your waist and pulling you to his chest as he breathed in the scent of you and your hair had let out a quiet exhale.

"How did I of all people deserved someone so understanding as you..? My angel."

He would only do this when you werent conscious. This way you couldn't saw how much effect you had on the most fearful and dangerous villains of Japan. A gangster. A killer.

Yet you were there... as always.

Hee could only promise he would try to be a better man, give a world cured off the diseaces for you to live.... After all, that was the minimun he could do after what you did and still do for him.

Poor man doesn't even know you were awake the whole time. He was about to live hell tommorow.

[ojcobsessed]

oliver jackson-cohen for flaunt magazine, by jessica romoff, july 2019

***

The first horror movie I ever saw was The Exorcist on my grandmother’s RCA console TV, midnight on Christmas Eve. My grandmother is a Catholic Portuguese woman who was devout to cross stitching and Jesus Christ, resulting in crucifixes nailed into every wall of the living room. So, as every flash and jolt from the TV screen would animate the tortured figurines with chilling white light, I prepared in panic and thrill for each one to flip upside down.

Not only did this movie ignite my passionate love for horror, but actor Oliver Jackson Cohen’s passion as well. Mine lead me to accumulating random 70’s slasher movie memorabilia and sporadic nightmares, while Cohen’s lead him to eventually being the star of hit Netflix horror miniseries The Haunting of Hill House as his character Luke Crain, with a few nightmares as well. The 10 episode show is a modern reimagining of Shirley Jackson’s novel “Hill House” and follows the Crain family during the summer they lived in the haunted home, and flashes forward on their lives decades after the tragic events.

During a phone interview with him, I learned Cohen is much more than just a dedicated actor with a jawline that can cut glass; Cohen is a whirlpool of empathy, an artist who gushes his heart into everything he does, and demands that his character Luke, and those battling with similar struggles, are portrayed more than just their addiction.

With your role in last season, I was really impressed by how you portrayed a character with drug addiction, and how you refrained from making him a stereotypical, one dimensional person - and I was wondering how you avoided leaning on this cliche when approaching Luke?

Thank you, number one, I think we all have seen drug addicts portrayed in movies and tv shows before. Most of the time, they are always portrayed as their addiction, and I don’t think that’s very true for anyone who knows anyone who has substance abuse problems; there is actually a fucking person there. So it was very clear from the get-go that I had a responsibility to present a fully formed human being, and they actually brought in a specific writer to write Luke’s character- who was a heroin addict in recovery. I said to Mike, the director and creator of the show - before we even started that it’s very important that Luke is the sum of all his parts and is not just his addiction. So I think that the way I approached it, is that when I first began doing all the research and the pre-work before we started filming, I started looking at documentaries, because I had never done heroin before, so I thought, Oh I’ll start looking at documentaries - but then I realized quite early on that that was putting a judgement on him. And I don’t think it’s fair - because behind anyone who has fallen into this trap is someone who is deeply struggling. And I felt it - I felt a huge amount of, not pressure, but a need to show the person behind the addiction and show the person who is actually struggling, and why he had become an addict. So I focused on that - so I spent no time whatsoever seeing Lucas as a drug addict; I saw him as someone who was struggling to come to terms with everything that he had experienced and happened in his life. And so I focused on anyone who is trying to numb themselves, that know they’re running away from something. So I built up the terror of that, instead of focusing on “I need my fix.”

Was there something that happened in your own life, that was out of your control and not your fault, but regardless someone judged you because of that - perhaps driving your connection to Luke’s character?

Oh 100 percent, and that’s what is so interesting, because I don’t have a substance abuse problem - but I think that out of all the characters I have ever played in the past 10 years, there’s the most of me in Luke. Like, all of that stuff of just trying to function, and the vulnerability, and just trying to be normal, and being so ashamed - all of that is my own shit, and so [laughs] I didn’t need to be a heroin addict to understand the pain that he was going through, so, so much. I think it’s incredible getting to play someone like that because, in a weird way it felt like therapy - I was able to go to work everyday and just be all the parts of myself. I think it’s interesting as well for men, there’s this whole thing about having to be a certain way, having to always be strong, and I think inherently a lot of people do feel incredibly fragile. So all of that stuff of Luke is me, and my stuff, and I didn’t have to pretend - I just got to go to work and be as vulnerable as I feel. You know we all have incredibly complicated lives and incredibly complicated upbringings,  and I used all of my stuff: I was diagnosed with PTSD a couple of years ago so all of that is in there with Luke - and it felt incredibly cathartic to be able to kind of put it all out there and be there.

When your work is something that is so emotionally rigorous, and strenuous, it must be very draining dedicating yourself to a character who is really struggling his whole life  - How do you unwind and decompress from this intensity?

[Laughs] I….you know what, I’m not very good at it. I feel like I’m one of those people, I’m sort of with the school of thought that you either go to work and you fucking do it  - and you do it for real, or go home. I’m not into this whole I’ll just pretend! thing, so it’s probably not the healthiest way of working. But I feel it’s necessary, and then I don’t know how to handle it. There were a couple of days on set where specifically we were filming all of Luke’s episodes or the stuff where he’s sort of roaming the streets - that got way too intense. We would rap at 6 am and I would go back to my house and sleep for a bit, and then wake up and just be so out of sorts: I would have to call people at home to reassure me that everything was okay.

I imagine the intensity can be overwhelming

Yeah, I mean, it sounds really wonky - but I think that when you’re messing around with stuff like that, and you’re tricking your brain into thinking something is real, and then on top of that you’re drawing from your own personal well of shit that probably should be kept untouched - it’s gonna be messy at times. So yeah, it gets… it did get a little hairy. But again I felt that it was important - and I think all of us across the board in the cast felt that it was so important to do that - to give Luke a voice. And what’s been so interesting when the show came out, it was so overwhelming, the response, specifically from people that have struggled with addiction. And it was so warming to hear these stories from people, so I think it was necessary for all of us as actors to go to those dark parts of ourselves, and put that out on screen.

Is there something that you wish you knew before you began acting in a horror TV series? Or about a TV series with intense family drama with horror influence?

Hm..I don’t know. Just… it’s all good. [laughs] it’s gonna be all good.

Honestly, that’s pretty solid universal advice. And I was wondering, are you a fan of horror in general?

Yes! Huge

And is this a genre that you want to continue with?

Yes, I had never done anything horror before, so this was a dream. I remember I watched The Exorcist when I was like eight or something, and it completely terrified me - and I still to this day have nightmares about it. I think what’s so clever about horror, and I think specifically with what Mike has done on our show, it becomes a metaphor for something else. So specifically with Hill House, if you take away the house and all the ghosts and all the horror elements, it’s about childhood trauma. So you can swap out what all those kids went through, the horror they experienced, can be swaped out for sexual abuse, or physical abuse, or anything like that. So you manage to kind of navigate all of these horrific things we kind of don’t want to look at, in the veil of ghosts, so it becomes palatable for an audience. I never knew this, Netflix told me this, that horror is the most watched genre in the whole world.

Really!?

Across the board, yeah! I thought it would be comedy. But that’s why Netflix made the show. Because they realized that actually there was such a massive market for horror. So yeah, a really long winded answer to your short question - yes I was a fan of horror, I always have been.

Me too! I’ve never thought about how horror can be a metaphor for trauma. That’s so fascinating. Just one last question - I know that you can’t say too much about the second season… right? Or they’ll shoot you.

Right [laughs]

So, see if you can answer this: if Season 1 and Season 2 were mythical creatures, what would they be?

[Laughs] What would they be… ahhh...I genuinely don’t know how to answer that question. They’re both just beasts from the darkest corners of our minds. Season 1…. Uh… what I can say - is that season 1 I believe was amazing, and with what they’re doing with season 2 is even…. More incredible.

[anbudrky2021]

Ch 5: Three Days

The 𝔇𝔢𝔩𝔦𝔠𝔞𝔱𝔢 Sound of 𝒯𝒽𝓊𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇 │ 𝕋𝕙𝕠𝕣 𝕆𝕕𝕚𝕟𝕤𝕠𝕟

No smut warning in this one. Next one there will be :) Please click here for series description and TWs. 💕

I woke up to the sound of Nat at my door. She let herself in and sat down comfortably on the edge of my bed. “Hey sleepyhead, you missed breakfast..” she handed me a muffin.

“Oh,” I sat up, groggy and confused. “I must have slept through the alarm,” I noted, looking at my phone.

“That’s ok. Wanda is waiting in the lab with Shuri when you’re ready.” She gave me a kind smile. I smiled back. More tests. Like a lab rat.

“You’re not a rat,” Natasha laughed. “You’re a human going through something strange. We’ll figure it out.”

I laughed as well, “Ok. I am going to get up.” I said, finishing my muffin and moving the bedding. I got up and around, brushing my hair and teeth; I changed into some leggings and a t-shirt. I slid on my sneakers and sighed. “Alright. I’m ready.” I noticed Natasha was looking at her phone, confused. “Everything ok?” I asked observantly.

“Yeah, just a message from Tony I don’t understand.” She rolled her eyes and placed her phone in her pocket.

I bet it’s about Thor’s mission to observe Bucky. I scoffed at my own thought.

“No it’s about something else,” Nat replied, smiling softly.

“I really need to get this fixed,” I groaned.

We reached the lab in time to run into Thor wandering out of the wing. “Ladies,” he nodded his head in politeness, but continued walking without stopping. I blushed.

I counted his steps as he walked away, hoping it would keep me from projecting any thought I might have.

We entered the main area and saw Shuri in another room, through the glass. She waved at us to come to her. We walked together to the room and sat down in the chairs provided.

“So I was up...all night,” she began, looking somewhat exhausted but excited at the same time. “I have some ideas and Wanda volunteered to be like...”

“The control group,” Wanda interjected. I jumped at her voice, not realizing she had been in the room.

“So I am the experimental group?” I said, a little nervous.

“Yes, but you knew that already.” Shuri rolled her eyes and continued. “I have some tests I have already started with Wanda and would like to conduct with you, to see the difference in the firing of neurons, etc.”

“Ok...” I stared at her.

“Basically we’re going to compare her brain activity to yours, since she’s the closest example of someone who can use your same powers.” She shrugged her shoulders. “It’s another place to start..” she sighed.

I don’t want to be compared to Wanda. I do that myself enough. As soon as I thought it, I regretted it; I didn’t need Wanda and Nat to go on their ‘you’re beautiful as you are’ crusade. But nobody responded. Either I was being ignored or I hadn’t projected.

After about 15 minutes of setting up, a few projections, and some frustration, we were ready to start the first test.

Shuri had created a slideshow of different scenes, people, and words. Each of them had a purpose, according to her, and could hopefully help her figure out triggers or stressors within me and Wanda. Wanda had already completed hers.

“Ready?” Shuri asked. “Remember, some of these may be...upsetting or emotionally jarring. So let me or Nat know if we need to stop.”

Nat was beside me in the room, whereas Wanda and Shuri were on the other side of the glass, next to the computer.

“Ready as ever I guess...” I took a deep breath and watched the screen change.

The first few were almost funny; a cow, a dog, basic things.

The next few were more interesting; the compound, a field, the jet, knives

The knives made me uncomfortable but I tried to stay calm.

“The knives set off a different part of your brain,” Wanda said through the glass. Shuri shot her a look. “I wasn’t supposed to say that; sorry!” Her eyes were wide and animated. She was adorable sometimes.

Scott Lang, Tony, Bruce, T’Challa, Shuri scrolled on the screen, one at a time.

Wanda, Natasha, Clint, Thor

My heart was starting to race and I was not comfortable.

Steve, Pietro, Vis, Bucky

I didn’t move, I didn’t think, I didn’t say anything. Bucky wasn’t on the screen; he was in the next room with Wanda and Shuri.

“Can you leave,” I heard Shuri say, “Thor was looking for you anyway. Go find him.” She wafted him away. He made a point to look at me and smile. I didn’t smile back, only turned my head back to the screen.

Peter

“Can I take a break please?” I asked immediately.

“Uh, sure...” Shuri looked at Nat and nodded. Nat helped me remove the different testing measures and I left the room quickly. I took deep breaths but I felt like I was dying.

Wanda came out of her room and walked toward me. “Hey, you did a great job...” she soothed me, taking me into her arms. “You were so good.” She rocked me a little, allowing for me to calm down more. I was able to take a deep breath and collect myself.

“Sorry. I know the point is to identify brain...stuff...but that was a lot for me.” I shook my head with disappointment in myself.

“It’s understandable, Y/N, you’ve been through a lot and you haven’t necessarily had closure...” she rubbed my arm. “Are you ready to come back?” She pointed at the door.

“Yeah.” I took another breath. Ready to leave is more like it.

“Quitting isn’t an option today,” Wanda retorted.

I laughed but knew she was right.

We did some more tests for a few hours. Some emotional, some physical, some logic-based. By noon, Wanda and I were exhausted in every aspect of the word. Shuri let us leave but Nat stayed behind to help her work on the test results to find any patterns or relevance.

Wanda and I chose to take a walk on the Palace grounds to get some fresh air and sunshine.

“That was...a lot...” she said softly. It was hard on her, too. After losing her brother and her mom and dad... “I didn’t realize how much I missed Pietro..” she sniffled, wiping her face on her sleeve.

“Yeah, it was...” I rubbed her back as we walked.

We walked in silence for a while. We got to see some kids playing, a dog wandering around, and Steve down in a field with Bucky, sparring we supposed.

I did not mention the tight feeling in my chest when I saw Bucky fighting; I just walked and counted my steps.

“Y/N, why have you been projecting numbers?” She asked as we reentered the Palace.

“What?”

“Well it’s always a different pace, but it’s always numbers.” She looked at me quizzically.

“Oh, well I am trying to count footsteps instead of letting my thoughts project. I guess I am projecting the counting...” I laughed a little.

She smiled. “You’re so creative, you know that?” I smiled back at her as we parted ways. I headed for my room.

By dinner time, I was starving. I walked out of my room and headed to the dinning area.

“Y/N, wait up!” Steve called after me. I turned and waited for him. “How did today go?” He asked, thoughtfully.

“It was tough but hopefully worth something.” I gave him a forced smile.

“Bucky told me he walked in on you guys working. He felt bad about it, you know...” he looked at me wearily.

“I don’t care,” I smiled at him, pretending to not care even though I wanted to punch him for mentioning Bucky.

“Hey! Please don’t punch me,” he feigned fright by putting his hands up in surrender.

“Steve. I just-” I inhaled deeply. “I think about Bucky every day. I think about what happened all the time. I don’t want to think about him or it any more than I need to...” I trailed off. “Thank you for relaying that, but I don’t have the capacity to care about what Bucky feels.”

Steve nodded with understanding. “I gotcha.”

We walked into the dining room. Where, of course, Bucky was seated.

Goddamn it. This mother fucker.

Everyone looked at me. I blushed. Of course I projected that. I counted my steps as I walked to my seat, between Steve and Wanda.

Natasha sat across from me, next to Thor and Shuri. Bucky was on the other side of Steve, out of my sight at least.

As I ate, I counted my bites of food. I counted the number of rolls on the table. I counted the number of freckles on Steve’s arm. Anything to distract myself.

“Jesus Christ, Y/N. Quit with the counting!” Bucky sat his fork down harshly. “Just tell me what you’re thinking so you don’t have to distract yourself and annoy everyone!” He looked around and past Steve, right at me.

Everyone was staring at us. “Buck, I didn’t hear anything...” Steve whispered to Bucky.

“Neither did I...” Nat interjected.

“So only Bucky heard the projection?” Shuri asked, interested.

“No,” Thor’s voice now echoed above theirs. “I heard it, too. I just assumed everyone did and I’m not as ass.” He glared at Bucky.

I was blushing and completely confused. I stood up and walked off without a word.

I heard large steps behind me but ignored them until my wrist was caught by a large hand.

“Y/N, are you ok? That was futile. Bucky was out of line.” Thor looked concerned.

“I’m fine. Please let me go. I’m just so tired.” I started to tear up. My mind was overwhelmed and my emotions were completely out of sorts. I needed my mommy. Thor let go of my wrist and nodded. “Do you want company? I can sit and talk or-“

“No. Thank you. I just need time. I’m going to go...Um, I’m going visit my mom..” I turned on my heel and left him behind.

I walked for about 30 minutes in one direction before approaching the cemetery. I took a deep breath for calmness and then entered the lot.

I walked among the rows, feeling more and more nauseous the closer I got to her. Finally, I saw her stone.

T’Challa had a special marble figurine commissioned for her. It was on top of her headstone. It was beautiful and exuded her brilliance tenfold. I smiled as I fell to my knees in front of it.

The sobs that left me the moment my knees hit the grass were earth-moving. I could feel my body tensing and writhing as my tears fell. My shoulders heaved with every cry. I slowly drifted closer to the ground until I was laying completely on top of her grave. My tears watered her grass.

I don’t know how much time passed, but I had fallen asleep on my mother’s grave. When I awoke, my head was pounding and my eyes felt like stinging, melting glass shards. I sniffled and sat up, looking around. It was dark. I sighed and looked again at her figurine.

“Mom what do I do? Everything is worse. It’s all getting worse. I’m projecting in the wrong ways or not at all. I feel so exhausted. I’m being triggered by everything. I need you, mom...” I listened to the wind in between the graves and stones. The breeze passing through crevasses.

I laid down on my back and looked up at the sky. It was beautiful. I smiled and remembered a moment with my mom in which we went star grazing in Wakanda. He laughed for hours and had the greatest conversations.

I wish Thor was here. He’d love this. I bet he would say something about the Asgard sky and then horribly describe it. But he’d be smiling and that smile...

I blushed thinking about his smile. But then I caught myself. But what about Peter. I groaned.

I looked more at the stars and continued to fight back and forth between thinking of Thor and Peter. I was so engulfed in my thoughts I didn’t hear the gate to the cemetery open and close.

“Y/n.” Thor voice was soft and respectful.

“WHAT THE FUCK!?” I screamed and jolted upright. “You scared me to death!!!” I fell back onto the ground.

He laughed and said “this would be a good place to drop dead..”

I chuckled. “I suppose so...how’d you find me?”

“Earlier you said you were visiting your mom. You’ve been gone for hours...and then...” he looked at me strangely. “I started...seeing what you’re seeing. Like I’m you...” he sat beside me, elbows on his crooked knees.

“And then...Peter called me. He was freaking out asking if you were ok. Because he was seeing the same thing I was...” he looked down at me.

I looked at him, feeling nauseous again. Immediately, without warning I turned my head and vomited just out of moms burial site.

“Woah!” Thor held my hair back and soothed me the best he could. “Are you ok?”

“I-no-I don’t think-“ and I was done. I passed out in Thor’s arms and didn’t wake for three days.

[jemej3m]

Pull To Talk

uhh heres a toystory au no one asked for 

*

When Junior was picked up from the gutter, all he could think was: shit. He plastered on his neutral face and let his limbs go limp. 

“Kevin,” a adult woman scolded. “Put that down!” 

“Mom,” pleaded the kid. “It’s Junior! He’s limited edition!” 

“Kevin,” his mother warned. “It’s probably someone else’s.”

“No name on the tag,” Kevin reasoned. “The whole story is that whoever finds him gives him a name and a story. But this one is blank!” 

“I would rather you not bring home a doll covered in gutter gunk,” she said, though it seemed she knew she had lost the fight. “Fine. Make sure this one doesn’t get lost, okay? Like Jean.” 

“I won’t,” Kevin said, opening up his backpack and depositing Junior within. 

“Well?” his mother asked. “What do you want to name him?”

The boy hummed, and then said: “Neil.” 

*

The boy’s room was miraculously neat: Neil had never been inside a child’s room before, but he’d done some calculated guesswork and Kevin didn’t quite fit in. 

It wasn’t until he’d been positioned by Kevin’s bed. He had a window shelf dedicated to his toys, where they remained still and perfectly positioned. He didn’t have many and Neil didn’t recognise any of the models. None of them came from his franchise or line: that was a relief. He didn’t particularly feel like interacting with a Lola or DiMaccio anytime soon, especially seeing as he’d only just sewn his limbs back on a few days prior. 

His story was simple: a comic surrounding his father’s midnight murders evolved into the story of a missing mother and her son. Whilst Mary’s narrative was well hashed out - a brother, a terrible decision leading to a violent marriage - running away with 5 million dollars - her son’s story was kept a mystery. Junior dolls were far and few between, seeing as he didn’t feature much in the Wesninski comics. The kids who purchased Junior dolls were meant to give him a name and a story. It wasn’t up to him.

That was fine by Neil, so long as he was kept well away from his father and his many cronies.  

Kevin nudged over a plastic doll dressed up in hip-hop gear with a bandana holding back her short curls, positioning Neil against the window. 

“Welcome home,” Kevin said. His mother called him to lunch, so he gave Neil a gentle pat on the head and darted off.  

The doll beside him slumped immediately. “Jesus, does he have to put me in such difficult positions every time?” 

“You can’t whine,” said a blonde Bratz doll as she kicked off her extremely tall heels and slumped to the floor. “Those shoes are a crime.”

“Are we all just going to ignore the fact that Kevin brought home someone new?” cheered a teddy bear, ambling over. He was a bit worn and thin, but the twinkle in his eye was just as bright as the rainbow ribbon around his neck. “Hi there! I’m Nicky!” 

Neil just blinked. 

“Don’t mind him,” said the hip-hop dancer. “He’s always like that. I’m an old DAN5ER model. Dan for short. It’s nice to meet you.” She held out her hand: her elbow squeaked as Neil hesitantly shook it. 

“I don’t remember a looker like you on the shelves,” the Bratz doll remarked, hopping over on foot-less stumps. She pinched Neil’s cheek and looked into his eyes. “Hm. Real glass beads. Aren’t you just fancy?”

“That’s Allison,” Dan sighed. 

A Madeline doll ambled over.  She had white hair that a child - not Kevin, for it was far too messy - had coloured in with various textas and a pinafore dress. “I’m Renee. We’re glad to have you here. It’s been a while since Kevin has brought someone new home.”

“Why?” Neil looked between the curious faces of Kevin’s other toys. “Was it Jean? His mother mentioned Kevin losing him.”

By their reactions, he could tell he’d hit the nail. 

“Cutthroat,” came a new voice. “How refreshing.” 

Neil looked up and saw a small, blonde figurine, perched on top of a stack of books. His features were angular and he wore all black. Beside him was a toy identical to the first but obviously a different model: he had different clothes and hairstyle, and was wearing glasses. 

The first blonde figurine hopped off the books and landed at Neil’s feet, standing up from his crouch with a slight stiffness to his knees. The sleeves of his jumper were pulled to his wrists, where he wore little black fingerless gloves. 

“Where’d he find you, then? Garage sale? School? You didn’t come with no packaging.” A finger prodded Neil’s deflated shoulder. “A little worse for wear, too. Maybe he just saved you from landfill.” 

“Andrew,” said the Renee doll. “He’s only new.” 

“Right,” he said. Neil watched with horror as his head spun around, showing a secondary face etched into the back of the figurine’s head. Andrew’s second expression was a twisted grimace that looked more like forced laughter than genuine happiness. “Welcome! We’re sure as hell excited to have less space on the shelf, but at least there’s a new target for Riko’s twisted attention! Great to have you. Hopefully you won’t last long!” 

Neil shot a look at Dan, who only rolled her lips into her mouth in response, turning away. 

Andrew’s head twisted back around, his bored expression far more palatable than his false euphoria. He glanced at the Renee doll and jerked his head: together they jumped off the shelf, onto Kevin’s bed and then down the crack between the mattress and the wall. 

“That was Andrew,” Dan said, sounding tired. “His twin, Aaron, is still up there.”

“Won’t you come say hi, Aaron?” Nicky called out. Aaron just shuffled away from the edge of the book stack in response, disappearing out of sight. 

“Matt’s still not back,” Allison pointed back. “If he’s not here by the time Kevin gets back from lunch, the kid is bound to notice.”

“He’ll be back.” At Neil’s arched eyebrow, Dan explained. “Matt’s my boyfriend. He keeps watch just in case Riko comes over.” 

Neil didn’t understand. He’d only seen Kevin and his mother here. Who was Riko?  “What about Kevin?”

Dan cocked her head. “What about him?”

“We’re Kevin’s toys, aren’t we?”

The doll hesitated for a moment, as if she was trying to figure out what the right thing was to say. 

“Kevin is a good kid,” she said, finally. “He only wants us to be happy, but he can’t always keep us safe. ”

Whatever she was talking about, Neil knew that he had to find a way out of here before it happened. He didn’t like being around other toys: for a while it’d been just him and Mary, but he’d been on his own for a long time. New names and faces were overwhelming him. 

The hidden loop was cold against his skin. If you pulled it, he’d say my name is Nathaniel Wesninski, or I don’t know who I am anymore. He kept it hidden under his sweater, praying that no one would ever find it. 

Whoever this Riko was, Neil would have faced worse in his time. These toys didn’t know what it was like, and for their sakes, he hoped they never would. 

All he had to do was sit tight for a little while, plaster on a stitched smile and pretend everything was fine. When the moment was right, he’d run off again. 

Just as his story intended. 

*

whoops

[eugenesmorphine]

Diamond Earrings And Sweet Words // George Luz Imagine

AN: If anyone has requested anything recently, just know that the imagines will be done, I promise. 

Taglist: @alienoresimagines​ @hihosilvers​ @floydtab​

Words: 1,639

 Y/N hummed at she walked into the Eagle's Nest. A whistle leaving her lips as her eyes scanned the room. Taking in all the nice and expensive items that belonged to the previous Nazi Officers that occupied the place. She walked over to a desk as she heard a few other Paratroopers file into the large room and she looked at the different amount of components littered all over the desk. The female Paratrooper taking each item into her hands and observing it. It had been a very long time since she had seen so many nice and valuable things. First it was a watch,  then a small figurine of some sorts, a small tea cup that was was the prettiest shade a white and blue. Though, one thing that caught her eye specifically was a shine. Her hands slowly placed the cup down and her focus now drawn to the item that carried the large glint. That being a beautiful set of diamond earrings. Y/n was left in total awe.

 See, Y/N grew up on the poorer sides of things. She worked hard her entire life along side her parents to make ends meet. Though, she never really had anything new or expensive. Especially when it came to clothing and jewelry. She only owned one pair that had been passed down through her mother's side of the family. And the female only wore them on extremely special occasions. And now, here she was, staring agape at the most beautiful piece of shiny jewelry she had ever seen. She slowly reached her hand down the the dangling pair of earrings.

 "Hey Doll, snag anything good yet?" A familiar man spoke loudly from behind her. Popping up to her side. Y/N jumped, lurching her hand back to her side as her body jolted upwards. A hand going to her chest from shock as she gulped, looking over to the man. That man being George Luz, standing there with a wide grin on his face and a lot of junk in his hands.

 "Jesus George! Don't sneak up on me like that! I thought you were a damn Kraut or something!" Y/N huffed as she pushed the Paratrooper's shoulder lightly. In which he just chuckled and snaked an arm around her waist.

 "Aw Doll, you know I'm too cute to be any Kraut! And you didn't answer my question," he placed a soft kiss on her temple. She hummed and turned, breaking away from the male. Who let out a small whine in protest and turned around with her and followed her gaze down to the desk in front of them. He quickly grabbed a few items, including the ones that she had just looked at.

 George's gaze quickly landed on the earrings, who Y/N was still gawking over. He cracked a small smile, knowing all about how she lived before they met way back in Paratrooper training. He thought it was cute seeing how Y/N was almost drooling over the piece of jewelry. He grabbed them slowly and brought them up to her hands. Which she quickly cupped in front of her body. Y/N's lover gently placed them in Y/N's  small hands. She looked at them and ran her thumbs over the shiny rocks that created the beautiful piece.

 "Why don't you try them on doll, I know you want to," he grinned as she looked up at him. Her lips quickly forming into a smile and she bite her bottom lip. Quickly walking over to a vanity with a big mirror. Sitting on the soft cushion seat while starring back at her reflection. George leaning down to look at his own reflection. Resting his head on her shoulder. She noticed how dirty she looked. How gross her hair looked. At all the dirt that was covering his S/C skin. In the moment, she had a strange feeling of vulnerability. These Nazi Officers lived this lavish lifestyle throughout this awful war that their commander in charge, Adolf Hitler, started. Whilst grunts like her and the rest of Easy Company, and men all over the globe, were dying every day of frigid temperatures, blood thirsty enemies, sickness, or god knows what. She couldn't even remember the last time that she had a shower. Y/N then glanced at the grinning man whose head rested on top of her right shoulder. His smile could light up anyone's life. No matter what. And don't even get the woman started on this man's laugh. It makes her heart melt each time.

 'How do I deserve him?' was all she thought. No matter how much mud, blood or dirt that was covering him and his uniform. No matter how much of a beard he had. He was so perfect in her eyes. Everything was perfect. But she looked like this. A female G.I. whose hair was knotted and covered in mother nature's grossest. 'He could land any time he wants, but he still choosing me?'

 George new that look that was etched onto his woman's face. He looked at her through the mirror. He pressed a sweet kiss onto the top of her head. Reaching down slowly, his eyes never leaving Y/N's E/C orbs. Grabbing the earrings gently out of her dainty hands and pulling her hair to tuck it between her ears. "You know you are the most beautiful woman I have ever set my eyes on," he spoke softly as he placed one earring oh so carefully into the piercing hole on her left earlobe. Y/N scoffed slightly and shit her eyes. Averting her gaze from his when she opened them.

 "Funny joke, Georgie," she exhaled as she looked back at him through the reflection of the mirror. He frowned slightly as he placed the other earring in. He then leaned over her, so his arms were now over her shoulders and his hands rested on the vanity in front of them. His chin rested on her hair, taking a deep breath and exhaling quite dramatically. For once, George was putting aside his jokes and trying to be serious. Most of the times, he showed his love through jokes, impressions, or god knows what else would come to the Paratroopers mind.

 "I'm serious Y/N, you're the most prettiest woman I have ever laid my eyes on," he spun her around in the cushion seat. She was now staring at him instead of her reflection. he earrings dangled from her ears. The shine sticking out clear as day compared to her rugged, dirty and tattered uniform. George meant his words with every bit of himself. He had fallen in love with the woman back in the beginning of all this shit. Way back three years ago when their boots first hit the dirt in Camp Toccoa. She was the first female in the Airborne, but she fit in so well with the rest of the men. Laughing, cracking jokes immediately as all the guys were being placed into their companies. And when she came up to George, forget it. He fell for her when she jogged over. A wide smile on her face, her hair swaying from side to side whilst in a tight ponytail. How she stuck out her hand as he was at a loss for words. And it was just the beginning.

 George placed his calloused hand so he could cup her cheek. Y/N smiled softly as she leaned into his soft touch. George did have his sweet moments. Besides his normal sweet. Like no jokes, just straight feelings. "Honest doll, you are better than any goddamn model. Whether covered in dirt, mud, and sweat. Or dressed up with a bunch of makeup. And once we get out of this mess of a war. I'm going to take your beautiful ass home, put a ring on that finger, you are going to put those earrings on along with a pretty white dress. I don't want no model that cries if she breaks a nail. I want a strong, determined woman that has killed more Krauts than I have. And that woman is you."

 Y/N was sort of shocked hearing the emotion that was leaving her boyfriend's lips. Sure he had been sincere in the past. But nothing like this. Not one joke left his mouth the entire time! What a shocker. She smiled and cupped his cheeks, pulling him down so their lips met for a short second. "I'd be more than happy George to do that. But first, you and I need some showers," Y/N started, standing up whilst George's arms wrapped around her waist pulling her close. Leaving no space between them. She giggled as the tips of their noses touched. "And a little birdie told me that there was a shower that was free," George smirked as he thought he understood what the female Paratrooper was implying to. He hummed as his head went into the crook of her neck, planting small kisses all over the surface area. Y/N bit her bottom lip slightly as she let out a laugh. Throwing her head back as her lover grazed across the ticklish spot of her neck.

 "Though, I call the first shower!" she shouted, quickly wiggling out of her man's grasp and taking off down the hall, pushing past a small group of Replacements that were entering the Eagle's Nest. George scoffed for a second, his hands dropped to his sides. Soon going to his hips as he stared at the now disappearing figure of his woman. "I'm totally marrying her," he exhaled as he chuckled. Quickly taking off in pursuit of the woman, the shine of those diamond earring still in her ears. George already knew what he was in for soon for his future with the love of his life. And he was more than happy with it.

[beautifulnrd]

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: Vintage MCM Mary Baby Jesus Blue Ceramic Figurine Christian Religious Décor.

[suffering-and-happy-about-it]

Oh, Sweet Jane... (Favored Ones, Part 31.)

Series description: Many things were surely fucked up in the year 2038, but no-one ever told anyone how all of it went down. What happened before a group of people left for Seattle to handle personal matters? Why did one girl refuse to leave all of it be? And why there were so many dead in the end?

Quote for the chapter: "Take me home - to the place I belong." - John Denver

Part summary: Seattle was seemingly over as you all tried to get back to a normal, day-to-day life again. But some things couldn’t be fixed anymore.

A/N: So... It’s here. This is the time I’m going to say goodbye. 

Warnings: Depiction of torture, bone breaking, depiciton of blood and manslaughter, anxiety, rage, anger

Word count: 3 K

Tagging:   @nemodoren @xxgoldenhour @missdictatorme @davnwillcome @pickleriiick @jodiereedus22 @gladiosamicitias @tamkashi @eternallyvenus @avengerssstuff @fangirl-inthe-us @avery-miller @mikah-writes @mad-hatter-98 @sadiaafrin99 @flavorishy @gabymiller

Series master list: H E R E

Joel Miller’s playlist for the bonfire occasions: H E R E

Youtube playlists: JACKSON DAYS | SEATTLE DAYS

Some time after the Seattle incident, unspecified location:

You knew the others will notice soon. You were gone for quite some time at that point, out of the radar, just you alone in the basement. The only light was coming from the lit-up candles - while you were shying away on an old sofa nearby, smoothing the instrument in your hands. You haven't played in such a long time... Could you still remember how to play guitar? Could you hold the chords, let your other arm play the rhythm? Jesus... It all felt so far away from the place you've been at the moment.

For a second, you smoothed the wood of which was the guitar made of, gently plucking the strings. The first signs of a melody came out effortlessly, having you smile at the sound. With that, you frowned and put your fingers so you could try the basic chords. It could be felt on your wrist that you haven't practiced for a fair amount of time - the bones were on fire when you kept on moving your hand. But the good news were that you still got the grip on playing the guitar. Slowly, you exhaled and prepared yourself to play one of the cheesy country love songs Joel once taught you. When you were sure that you can keep the melody, you started to sing the words - slowly remembering all of the small things about the song Joel had shown you. Your smile grew.

He'd be so happy if he could see you play and sing - if he'd be there. You hadn't done any of that in years, yet when you got out of the bed, you disappeared in the basement and hadn't come out the whole day. Sometimes, all you needed was to be alone. You still could see Abby covered in blood Lev's sobs filled your ears. On those days, you were nowhere to be found for a big portion of the morning - at least until you calmed yourself down. Then, when your head cleared up once again, you were good to do stuff.

Truth be told, you haven't thought about playing the guitar for a long time. Right, you were quite busy the last few years, but how long could it be since Seattle happened..? Four years? Five years? Jesus, you hadn't any idea, to be honest. JJ was such a big boy now... It was quite some time since all that massacring and terror which still haunted you inside. Sometimes, you woke up in the deep night, paralyzed and crying. You'd sweat that at these moments, Abby was kneeling on you, holding a fucking knife to your throat. It was strange for you to still have Seattle and Baldwin all mixed up after all the things that happened in the meanwhile, yet there you were, still seeing each of them in your dreams. Maybe you couldn't name the Hispanic man or the headphones girl, but you still saw their faces.

First months after Seattle were the most crucial. You were waking up alone in the middle of the nightmares that haunted you, panting and crying. Your body was tensing on its own. Sometimes the huge scar on your thigh was hurting. Your heart raced at those moments, your mouth was dry. Countless times, you've ended up on the toilette, puking as you cried. Ellie once came to you after midnight, looking similar to you. There were dark circles under her puffy eyes, she was crying. That night, you both made yourself a cup of coffee, listening to Ecstasy with your eyes closed. Before the shock from the experience passed away, you couldn't sleep for shit. You were sincerely happy when the whole disgust and terror slowly settled down inside of you, letting you sleep for at least six hours in a row. That was all you wanted and needed.

As you thought about Seattle once in a while again, a child's voice made you almost freak out as they spoke. - "I've found you! I heard the music!" - A small, black-haired boy was hugging the railings of the stairs leading to the basement with his small palms as he was crouching there, looking at you. You must've got lost for a minute there - letting your body play and sing while you thought about other stuff. Nervously, you stopped playing and put the guitar away into its cover, making sure it's on its place.

"You sure did found me." - A chuckle came out of you as you blew out the candles, walking the stairs up to the boy. Now the only light was coming out from the opened up door. - "You know this ain't no place for you or your brother, come on." - You mumbled, waiting for him to stand up and walk the stairs up. When you closed the door, you immediately locked it too, pushing the key into your back pocket. - "Are you hungry? Huh?" - You offered the boy your hand, leading him into the kitchen. The kid furrowed and shook its head. - "Not even for a piece of cake? I highly doubt that you had some lunch." - The guilty face of the boy told you everything you needed to know. He hadn't seen a piece of food the whole day, just as you suspected.

"Are you mad at me, mommy?" - His quiet voice asked. For a moment, you smiled unbelievably as you kissed the boy's forehead. Then you smoothed his small cheek and shook your head. Normally, you'd be grumpy about everyone in the household being incapable of having lunch. They've been probably too busy with doing something else; this was pretty normal - once you were off the radar, the boys forgot to eat something.

"We'll call this day a lazy one, how does that sound, buddy? It was a weird one nonetheless." - You asked and kissed the boy's forehead again as you helped him climb on the countertop, which you also normally did only when you were cooking, so both the boys would know how not to starve. - "I didn't know you can play as aunt Ellie can, mommy." - The boy wondered as you pulled the cake out of the oven, putting it next to the boy. You didn't answer him, just smiled into the distance.

You didn't play a lot anymore. If was too reminiscent of the time you've spent in the hellhole and honestly, you didn't have the nerves to keep up with it. - "Will you play something for us?" - Henry persisted on the topic of guitar, not letting you take a breath. With a stiffened smile, you smoothed his hair, but you didn't answer his question - again.

"Hold the fortress, I'll go for the rest, deal?" - You asked silently as you already walked to the terrace, leaving Henry sitting on the countertop next to the cake. Just as you suspected, the rest of the boys was sitting there with their noses stuck in other wooden carvings. For a moment, you watched them before you coughed to make them realize they were being watched the whole time.

"Oh. Hey." - Joel leaned his back into the chair while Aiden, the other twin, just smiled at you and then turned his head back to the animal he was working on. - "We didn't want to interrupt you, so we decided to... Eh... Practice." - The man explained to you - but Henry, the hyperactive kid he was, wasn't able to sit in one place, running away in the middle of... Whatever his piece of wood was meant to represent and finding you inside the basement. Aiden, on the other hand, was able to spend hours sitting down, working on these small figurines. He loved this - this was probably one of the biggest connections Aiden had with his dad. But both your boys were awesome.

It went all downhill when you got back from Seattle. On your way out you buried Jesse and had a small ceremony for the boy. After that, you left the city once and for all. Dina was pregnant and needed medical attention. Tommy, at first, seemed to be cool with how the things played out in the end. Yet soon enough after you arrived back, it became apparent how fucked up that man was. Something, that happened in the city, went hand in hand the last branch of sanity inside Tommy's brain breaking into small pieces. Ellie and Dina decided to leave Jackson for the wellbeing of their family, now living just an hour on the horseback from the city. Yet on top of that, you realized rather soon how fucked up you were - sure, you knew that the pills Maria was giving you won't last until the end of the trip, but being pregnant, that was a whole new thing. Until you came to terms with the news, you were arguing with both Miller brothers, eventually setting down everything with Joel.

But Tommy? Where to start when talking about Tommy? He wasn't able to resolve the inner conflict no matter what. And as could be predicted, he blamed you and Joel for letting Abby go. Sometimes, when he was really in the mood, he tried to play this little pissing contest with Ellie. But as more time passed by, you were glad for what you've done even more than before. Mel and the baby needed someone to look after them - Dina would be fucked up without you just as Mel would be fucked up without them. And to be honest, there were even times when you wondered where are they now. If they're even alive at that point in time. At the same time, you knew you won't even get an answer to that question. Yet Tommy was obsessed with finding her since you were 'an incapable whore who let all of it slip between her fingers'.

That was what he yelled at you last week, the last time he was visiting you. And after that... You hadn't seen him. It was mainly because you walked him out of the house with a shotgun barrel pointing at the back of his head, yeah, but he had left Jackson later the very day on which you had the fight. Why would he stay? He and Maria were arguing all the time, she kicked him out multiple times and he called each of you some nasty names. The man didn't spare any of you - not even his older brother. Tommy didn't have a place in Jackson anymore, so he went after Abby.

Last, you heard about the man that he went to see Ellie that day, trying to get her down for the plan when he didn't succeed with you or at least Joel, but they told him basically the same thing. Now that you found some safe space you wanted to protect at any cost - and on top of that, you all had kids. There was no fucking way in hell you'd change that for a hunt on a person whom you already forgave. And most likely, Ellie felt the same way you did - if she wasn't, Dina was doing a hell of a good job keeping Ellie in one place.

"We'll be having some cake, so get your lovely bottom into the dining hall." - You whispered, reminding your son to clean those nasty hands before getting to the table. But Joel knew you wanted to talk to him before pretending that everything's a-ok again. - "Any news on Tommy? Sightings? Notes? Anything?" - Quietly, you went through the various pieces of art they had on the table, smiling at each one of them. Joel was making another horse as it seemed, while Aiden created something similar to a squirrel, you assumed.

"No, I hadn't heard about him since last week... But listen. He's gonna be 'kay. I know my brother." - The man took his glassed down. The smile on his face was unhappy, strange, and almost painful. There was no wonder about that. - "I'm just sad that I walked him out with a shotgun in my hands. I wish for Tommy just... You know... He could talk to us." - "Don't be crazy, Millers don't work like that." - Joel joked around with you, but it was partially serious as the man kissed your knuckles, sighing deeply.

Once, Joel fucked up the family relationships with his brother. And for more than ten years, it was bugging him off on the back of his head. Slowly, through patience and a lot of awkward moments, they somehow repaired the broken relationship - just like Joel did with Ellie. They now had a relationship which was not based on lies, but on truth. Yet since they started to be brothers again, Joel and Tommy, the man knew it didn't feel like Tommy to just... Drop off the radar just like that, without letting anyone know where he's going. Especially after getting crazier each passing day. Joel hoped that his baby brother can take care of himself. He hoped Tommy's safe.

"Did you hear the news already? About the Fireflies?" - You asked quietly, yawning for a bit. The man knew how crazy your nights could get after Seattle - there was even a time when neither of you could do the whole relationship thing, when you just closed off inside your home, trying to find the balance inside you. So instead of discussing the news, Joel hugged your thighs and smoothed your lower back while his head rested on your belly. - "You've had another one of these dreams, huh?" - Joel asked quietly, humming at the feeling of your fingers between his hair. There was nothing that you could say to Joel. He already heard every single one of them and given they were playing in your head on a constant loop, it was rare to actually have any nightmare. - "Wanna talk 'bout that, girl?" - He asked, but you were already stepping aside so you could feed the hungry small animals you had in your kitchen.

The boys, surprisingly, didn't eat the cake already. While Henry was still sitting on the countertop, Aiden was toying around with the gramophone in the living room. This boy of yours was interested in music and when there was free time, Joel and the boys were working on their own guitars. The old-timer already knew how to make one, since he finished yours in the summer after Seattle happened. Once the boys would get older, he planned on learning them how to play. So it was normal to see the boy toying around with the pieces of vinyl and the gramophone. - "Can I play some music, please?" - The boy asked after some time of pretending that he was reading the names of the songs. - "Of course, play us something." - You agreed while you let Henry slice the cake, making sure that the kid won't cut his fingers.

Just when Joel, dressed up only in a grey t-shirt this time, was about to sit down to the table, Aiden went to tug on his arm, leading him to the gramophone to get some help with the reading. And soon, you realized why. You had this one song you liked probably the most from your collection - it was given to you from Ellie and Dina last Christmas. And it met a lot to Ellie since according to her words, it was the first song she ever kissed someone she loved to.

The girl never talked about Riley that much, but both you and Dina knew that before the Jackson love escapades Ellie went through, there was another girl. And this was their song. Now, she was giving it to you because Dina and she found themselves a new album to listen to. - "Guys, you always know how to make me dance." - You commented with a small smile, hearing the first trumpets of Etta James' song. And to prove the point, you wiggled your bottom to the rhythm from preparing some coffee and tea. This made both the boys giggle. Henry, being as active as always, went to jump off from the countertop and almost killing himself in the process as he followed his brother to dance around the living room. Joel, when he assumed the two small guys were doing okay, stepped behind you and watched your hands preparing the drinks.

"I might never be okay, you know that? But I'm trying for you and these guys." - You asked suddenly, stopping everything you were doing at the moment just to look at him. There were still problems inside your head, as proven earlier that day. It wasn't any kind of PTSD exactly, but yes, the things you've done were about to haunt you. And the older Joel became, the more he seemed to think about the things he had done, and honestly, he was doing all he could for the community.  Yet just as Etta was singing, the man smiled at you, pecking your cheek to see you grin. - "But I got you, babe." - The man answered and for a moment, you leaned your temple to his shoulder while watching the boys dancing around.

And yeah, you had each other no matter what. There were moments when you had disconnected, sure, but you always tried to find the way back. The kids were making you stay in the reality - and when there was something that tried to drag you down, it was them who made you get your shit together rather quickly. People from Jackson liked you in one way or another, it was a safe space for you.

As for what happened to Mel, Abby, Tommy, or Lev... You never got to know. And maybe, it was for the better. Maybe, after all, it was all worth it in the end.

FIN

Author's last notes regarding the story: It was hard to end this one, it was fairly tricky. And I'm not talking about this chapter. I'm talking about the chapters before it. The characters were going through... Not even a rollercoaster of emotions, but through a repeating cycle of knowing that they're doing something very bad, but they needed to prove themselves they're in the right.

To be honest, this reasoning that needed to be done often ended up in kind of a loop that was exhausting for me to write and it mustve been very hard for you to navigate through it. And I realize that. I am so glad that I'm finished with this since the whole story made me feel uneasy at times, especially when I look over at the Seattle chapters. It's ended like this because it gives you an idea of what the characters are up to after the story ends, but it's vague enough to leave you in the dark and to let your imagination work on how you want the story to end.

Thank you for sticking around with me, I will be looking forward to seeing you in another of my fics. Bye.