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morizoras-cave · 4 years ago

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Persistent (Request)

Marvel cast x f!teen!co-star!reader

Genre: angst-ish, fluff

Request Description: Hellooo! Could you write a all the marvel cast men x teen! reader? Like they all go out to eat and hangout at a mall or something and when she goes in the women’s part of a store while they are all on the men’s side, some creepy dude keeps on hitting on her and like after she tries to politely decline his attempts and stuff rdj and the rest are like nuh uh this ain’t happening lol

Warnings: language, hints at smexual stuff, harassment, persistent asshole

(A/N): this story includes anthony mackie, winston duke, sebastian stan, chris evans, robert downey jr and mark ruffalo. im sorry i didnt include alllll of the marvel dudes, but i just find it hard to cram them all into one fic :((( ALSO sorry if the ending is shitty hgssghsgsh

“You don’t have to bring me with you.”

“It’s too late, we’re bringing you.”

“But-”

“Y/n, you are not spending your birthday alone!”

You and Anthony were bickering like always. There was a short break in filming the next marvel movie, and while many people, including you, were planning on going home for the week, Sebastian, Anthony, Winston, Chris and Tom and arranged a ‘guys night out’, if you will.

You were going to enjoy your birthday that day with your family, but a couple of days before your family had cancelled, because of exams and overloading work. They promised you’d celebrate some other day, but you were still bummed out.

Anyway, Anthony had somehow reluctantly made you admit that you were celebrating alone, and had decided to instead drag you with him and the guys to their ‘night out’.

“I don’t wanna come and just be a bother to everyone,” you mumbled. Anthony sighed and looked at you. He then diverted his eyes back to the road.

“You’re not bothering anyone, N/n.”

“Well, you’re gonna have to cancel your plans to the strip club or whatever you were gonna do!” You stressed. Anthony gasped like a TV mean girl.

“Did you really think we were gonna go to a strip club? Y/n, that’s private business, you don’t do that with your guys.”

“Well, what then?”

The mall, apparently.

You and Anthony both stood with your necks craned to look at the proud and boasting sign, ‘mall of America��. He’d shut up after your question and just parked the car, leading you to stand exactly there, in front of that famous mall.

“You’re gonna go shopping?” you looked at him.

“Yeah, and what about it?”

Before you could start another argument with Anthony, you heard a familiar ‘hey!’ and snapped your head in the direction of the caller. Winston, Sebastian, Chris, Robert and Mark were all gathered together, seemingly waiting for you two.

“Hey, there you are! We were waiting for you,” Chris said with his usual big, dorky smile on his lips. Him and Anthony hugged and then he pulled back to look at you.

“Y/n, you okay with spending your birthday with us?”

“Whatever, man,” was all you could say, making the group burst into laughter.

You would never admit it to Anthony, or any of the others for that matter, but it was actually a lot of fun. You went into many stores for no apparent reason. The guys bought and helped you make a Build-A-Bear, which you named Svenbjorn, and he had a little detective suit and a little bag.

You ate at a Denny’s, where Mark unfortunately, but rather predictably, spilled maple syrup on himself. Then you looked around stores for fancy suits and clothes and gifts for their loved ones. Your mood was brightened, and the guys sure didn’t seem to be displeased that you were there.

“Let’s go in here real quick,” Sebastian had said, and everyone walked with him into the clothing store. You hadn’t actually bought anything that day, so you decided that maybe it wouldn’t hurt to look around a bit.

“I’m gonna go to the women’s section,” you said, pointing to the area at the other end of the store.

“Sure,” Robert waved you off, as him and the others crowded around a blue suit. You rolled your eyes and bounded off to the women’s area.

Your eyes found a pretty yellow shirt hanging on a rack near the back. You quickly made your way to it, standing and admiring it, checking the fabric and the price.

“Hey, babygirl,” a cocky voice sounded beside you. You turned your head to see a boy around your age, an ugly smirk on his lips. His words almost made you vomit the Denny’s pancakes you’d just eaten, but you shook off the feeling.

“Uh, hey,” you mumbled, turning back to the shirt. Now you fiddled with it nervously.

“What’s a pretty girl like you doing here alone, huh?” his voice was strangely predatory, something about it just didn’t sit right with you. It made you feel alerted and uncomfortable.

“Looking at shirts..”

“I bet you’d look good in this one,” he said. You didn’t have to look to know he’d found some sheer-ass, see through, titty exposer. You did however peep, and, yes.. You were right.

“Look, I’m not interested,” you sighed.

“That’s too bad, girlie, I could make you feel real good.”

You scrunched up your nose in disgust. Your fingers gave up their grasp on the shirt, deciding that it would be best to just get out of there. The sound of your boots hitting the shiny floor sounded, as you began padding away.

“Hey, wait, where are you going?” you heard him walking behind you, the action of persistence making your heartbeat speed up. You were now panicking.

“Hey! Why are you following her?” you breathed out in relief. Winston was standing not too far away, Sebastian and Anthony behind him. He had lowered his voice to sound more threatening, which you normally would laugh at, but considering the situation, you were pretty relieved he did it.

All the three men looked pretty damn angry. You didn’t know how much of the conversation they’d heard, but obviously enough. Hearing another set of boots, you snapped your head to see Chris, Mark and Robert jogging towards the scene. You made eye contact with Chris, who furrowed his brows in confusion.

The boy was now looking at the six angry and buff men, swallowing fearfully. He was shaking and surely starting to sweat. You smirked. Asshole. You walked over to stand between Sebastian and Chris.

“Are you okay?” they both murmured, searching your eyes worriedly. The fact that they were so protective of you made you smile a bit. Although, the thought that you needed several men with you to the mall to protect you kind of sucked.

“I’m alright,” you said. Meanwhile, Winston, Anthony and Robert were approaching the kid with disapproving looks.

“Didn’t your mom ever tell you to respect women? Huh?”

“What’s your issue, kid? You had such a big mouth just a moment ago?”

“Don’t ever talk to any woman like that ever again, you hear me?”

They didn’t even touch him, just the anger and seriousness in their voices and on their faces was enough to get the message into the kids head. He nodded, breath shaking. Then, he dashed off between Winston and Anthony, running out of the store, like a dog with its tail between its hind legs.

When the other three turned back to you, they were still angry.

“I can’t believe him! I can’t believe that asshole!” Anthony muttered, disbelief ridden in his voice. Winston had grown softer, looking down at you in concern.

“Are you okay, N/n? He didn’t touch you, did he?” You could tell he was actually worried.

“No, no, nothing like that. It’s okay, guys, it really wasn’t that serious,” you explained, wanting them to calm down. You couldn’t be the reason why their ‘guys night’ was ruined.

“Not that serious? Y/n, he wasn’t backing off when you told him to!” Robert seemed even angrier that you were denying the severity of the issue. You just shrugged.

“This kind of stuff happens all the time, this time I just had you guys with me,” you explained. By the looks on their faces, that wasn’t the most reassuring answer. In fact, even Chris and Sebastian and Mark (the sweetest human being ever, theoretically incapable of feeling anger) were angry now, scoffing.

“That’s not- That’s-” Chris put his hands on his hips like an angry mom. Sebastian squeezed your shoulder, making you look at him, to see his jaw clenched.

“Y/n, if that ever happens to you, no matter how big or small, just call us, please,” Anthony said, eyes catching yours to express how serious he was. You nodded. “I mean that shit.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll call you.”

There was a moment of silence where everyone just basked in their anger, before Mark spoke up.

“Hey, how about we just continue as planned and go watch a movie at the cinema?”

Reluctantly, everyone started walking to the cinema. You noticed how your walking formation had changed, almost caging you in, protecting you. Although you, Mark and Winston kept a pretty solid conversation, you couldn’t help but overhear the other’s talking about how angry they still were. Of course, they had every right to.

The night turned out alright again, as they slowly shook off their anger. The movie was great, and it created something new to talk about other than the ‘disrespectful little shit from earlier’.

When Anthony drove you both back to the hotel you were both staying at, he had another serious conversation with you. He talked about staying safe and keeping a backup weapon and such.

He wasn’t usually serious, so you listened carefully. You were thankful that they had been there that day. So were they. And from that day on they all were a little bit more protective with you - whether it was in interviews or just in daily life - they kept you close and was always slightly suspicious of anyone talking to you.

It meant a lot to you, and you thanked them, both for their protection, for an awesome birthday, and for one bitchin’ build-a-bear :)

___________________________

Tag List:

@hera-the-writer @marvel-madness @40srogcrs @whatthefuckimbisexual @snarky–starky @garbage-potato @eviemarvel @lozzypoz321 @allthecreativeonesaretaken @missamericana713 @rororo06 @shady80smusicsingercolor @ireadfanficforfun

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cblgblog · 3 years ago

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Sorry I’m advance but one of my other favorite accounts just reblogged a Tony scene and people are talking about Civil War and how it made them Stan Tony, and how when they watch that movie they hate team cap👀 Then someone was all about how he was sleep deprived and how much pressure he was under and couldn’t understand how people didn’t like Tony because. Someone literally said that when someone says they don’t like Tony in Civil War they say “did you watch the same movie as me.” I’m baffled. Oddly enough someone else said, ��he just wants to help everyone.” Sorry for the rant but I think people forget about what the accords are and what it would mean for people. Side note, I hope you’re having a great day/night 😀

No sorry needed!

I feel you man, I do. Honestly, I’ve unfollowed people based on similar posts when I was in especially Done moods, so.

Look on the one hand, the movie would’ve been a narrative failure if everyone was in favor of one side or the other, right? The whole point of the damn thing—besides giving the Mouse overlords more money—was to spark discussion, debate. Which, yeah, we’ll call that the tame description for what actually happened. But just, the thing was meant to split the fanbase so in that regard…winning? Thanks, I guess?

Film is also very obviously subjective, different strokes for different folks, so yeah, ten people can watch a movie and none of them are gonna see the exact same film. Let’s try to remember that this is, in theory anyway, a good thing. I just read a professional film review yesterday where I had the same reaction. What film were you watching, dude? Incidentally his reviewing partner said the same thing.

So honestly, no, they weren’t watching the same film as you or I or anyone else, because everyone brings their own biases and experiences and knowledge and interests into a thing, and that’s always going to flavor how it’s viewed. Again, let’s try to remember that this is good. In theory. Heavy on the theory.

That out of the way? Let’s get into Tony specifically so his uber stans can find this and scream at me on anon as though I just shot RDJ with a nuke.

Oh yeah, he was stressed. Oh, he was sleep deprived. Yeah, I’ve heard that. And that it’s Pepper’s fault, if she hadn’t left the poor baby, if she was there to rein him in, he’d be fine dammit, leave the baby alone!

Here’s the thing. You know who gets a pass on their shit behavior when they’re upset or tired? Actual babies. Actual babies and toddlers, and children, up to a point. Because they actually cannot always help themselves. Their bodies and brains are different, they have not learned better.

When you’re a 50-year-old man who’s supposedly the world’s bestest superhero, who wants, wants to be in charge of protecting the whole world? You need a little more self-control than that. The sleep deprived excuse works if you snap at someone before you’ve had your coffee, not for this. Roseanne Barr didn’t get to blame Ambien for her racism, Tony doesn’t get to handwave CW away because oops, I was tired.

Really? You’re a superhero, dude. Most of your teammates are tired too, that’s part of the gig. If you crash and burn this badly without your afternoon nap, fucking hang up the armor and go back to your billionaire playboy lifestyle.

Speaking of that, sure, right. It’s Pepper’s fault because she left him. Put aside the argument on whether that was justified or not (cough, it was and she should’ve stayed away even though they are adorable together). It’s not Pepper’s job to keep Tony sane. It’s not any partner’s job to do that for anyone. If she wants out, she has a right to that, without Tony going off the rails and blaming it on her. Seriously, he says part of the reason he backed the Accords was to “split the difference” with Pepper.

Dude. You were an asshole and you lost your girl. You destroyed all your suits, turned an emotional and mental corner in IM 3…and then relapsed 4 minutes later I guess because Whedon. Either way, Tony admits himself that he does not want to stop. So instead of doing that, or finding another partner who can accept that, you back an unjust international law that pits you against your team, your supposed friends? Go to therapy, have a pint of ice cream, cry into your pillow, send her more of those strawberries you sent her in IM 2 that she’s allergic to. You don’t go trying to change international law in ways that could ultimately affect millions of people because your girl left you.

Honestly—and thank God they didn’t do this but—the only way the Pepper excuse works in excusing his behavior in any way is if she’d died. Or been severely injured like Happy in IM 3. Still wouldn’t be okay, but, like Quill messing up their chance to stop Thanos because Gamora died, it would’ve been more understandable. Understandable, not excusable, and the way the MCU treats their women as manpain fodder, we’re probably legit lucky we didn’t get this.

As for him wanting to help everyone. He does in fact want that, I think. The problem is that his need to feel like he’s doing that is stronger than his rational mind, or his want to actually help in a constructive way.

Tony is too smart. He’s dumb as hell in many instances, mostly involving people and relationships, but he’s also too smart, and he’s been told for too long that he’s smart, and he’s bought into it. Ultron. Suit of armor around the world, protects the world, no more alien threats. It’s a simple concept on paper that fails in execution. So there are people with dangerous powers. Okay, we’ll make a set of laws to keep them from being dangerous, problem solved. But again, it isn’t.

Tony is not used to problems he cannot solve. He’s a genius, right? He can fix anything. He should be able to fix anything. That’s how he feels. But not everything is zeros and ones and circuits, things that can be fixed mechanically like his armors can. The people he wants to protect are not built that way. But he needs to feel like he’s doing something, because he’s terrified of what happens to the world if he doesn’t. So he creates these simple solutions to complex problems. The suit of armor, the Accords. They sound good in theory, but the problems they’re trying to solve are bigger than they are. And Tony, way back in IM 1, he sat back for years, clueless that his weapons were being used for bad things. He says it to Cap in CW. When he found out what his weapons were being used for, he went in and stopped it. Whether or not he should’ve known that already is a separate issue here. The point here is that when he found out, too late or not, he went in and did something about it.

Tony needs to do something about it. Again, go back to Cap in AoU, Tony’s nightmare sequence. Steve asks Tony why he didn’t save them. Tony’s ultimate nightmare is that he sits back and does nothing, and his inaction causes everyone to die. Which is where you get Ultron. Something he came up with because of what he saw in space in Avengers 1, then doubled down on in AoU. It’s where you get the Accords. Oops, he caused someone to die, he killed Charles Spencer. Must do something about that right now so it doesn’t happen again, and he won’t have to feel this guilt. He should be collaborating with others to come up with solutions (no Bruce in AoU doesn’t count because Bruce was dumb there), or at the very least, taking more time to think through the repercussions of the things he puts out there. But he doesn’t, because he’s got his savior complex that tells him that he alone can and must fix this, and because he’s too dumb to realize how not-smart he is in certain areas.

“We need to be put in check. Whatever form that takes, I’m game.”

Isn’t that what he says in CW, or something very close to it? Whatever form that takes. That’s the issue, right there, whatever form that takes. Realistically, yes, there should be laws regarding people with powers, the same way there are special laws pertaining to people who carry guns, or people who are licensed to fly planes. You have a thing/can do a thing that not everyone else does, so there are regulations pertaining to that thing. Laws change with the times, they always have. Some new technology comes up, eventually there will be laws that regulate it. As there should be, honestly. The issue with the Accords, Steve’s issue with the Accords, was not the basic idea. He says as much. He says that it could work, but there would have to be safeguards. Safeguards that are not in the Accords that Tony wants him to sign.

It's not a matter of oh, fuck the law, there should be no law governing these people, they’re above it. The problem is that the law as it’s presented here is unjust. There’s what, a month between Lagos and Ross coming by to tell them about the Accords? A month is not enough time to properly analyze such a big issue, Especially when you’re reacting out of fear, which is what happened with Lagos. People died because of an Enhanced person, an Avenger, in this case. Lawmakers don’t want that to happen again, they especially don’t want the political shit storm that comes with it. Damn, we look like we were asleep at the switch here, not having anything to throw at this problem earlier. Quick, let’s throw together this thing so no one can say we’re not addressing the problem.

Patriot Act of 2001, anyone? 9/11 happened, the public were rightfully terrified, the US said oh man, these are unprecedented circumstances, we’ve never had this before. Don’t worry though, we’re on this, we’re protecting you. The reality being that that bill simply gave the government too much power, most of it being used against people who were not actually threats, and it’s debatable, to say the very least, whether or not that law helped more than it hurt.

No law is perfect. No law ever will be. It’s not possible. We still have to strive for perfection though, have to aim there so that the laws we get are as close to fair as possible. Tony’s a big deal. If not for his “whatever form that takes” attitude, he might’ve been able to use his influence to pressure lawmakers into coming up with a fairer bill. Hey, I’m me, the public loves me, I will endorse this bill publicly and work on getting the rest of the team to sign, but you need to change this and this and this first, or no deal. Instead, he took the easy way out, the quickest, easiest way for him to feel like he’s atoned for his sins without actually doing anything. Whatever form that takes.

Tony’s not wrong because he backs the creation of a law that addresses these things. He’s wrong because he says himself that he does not care what that law does, specifically, so long as it exists. He’s wrong because he violates said law upteen times during the movie, while preaching to team Cap about what assholes they are for not backing it. He’s wrong because he cares more about feeling as though he’s tackled a problem than he does about taking the time to make sure that the thing he’s proposing is actually a good idea. He’s wrong because of what he does with Bucky, though that’s honestly a separate issue, for the purposes of this discussion.

Anyway, that was longer than I ever wanted it to be. Damn. Next time you see a comment about CW being the reason people stan Tony, just remember there are other people out there who stopped stanning Tony because of that movie. Everyone’s entitled to see a piece of media however they see it, and although the Tony stans are often the loudest, there are plenty of like-minded people out there who share your take on events. Block who you need to, unfollow who you need to, blacklist what you need to, and don’t let them get you down.

Hang in there, and have an awesome day :)

#pro steve rogers #pro team cap #anti tony stark #anti tony stans #anti iron man #anti team iron man

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ironxkid · 4 years ago

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why don't you like endgame or civil war

((hoo buddy, idk what brought this up but salt under the cut!! Like... a lot of salt - specifically regarding Endgame lmao

I’m gonna start off with CACW because it’s a short response lol

I don’t like it simply because I was done with the infighting between the Avengers. The found family crumbs we were given in Endgame was something I really wanted to see, and them just... ripping them apart frustrated me lol

honestly, the movie was... fine? Idk, I found it to be a lil slow for my taste (it felt like it just dragged on when I watched it in theaters), and I just don’t care for it in general ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Also, ngl, I’m really bummed that Captain America: Serpent Society was a joke announcement because that sounds dope as hell and I really wanted to see that before I realized it’d been a joke dfgjhdsfhj

but, yeah, literally just because CACW is specifically an infighting movie annoys me to no end so I just won’t watch it again dgsfjhsfdhj

now, Endgame?

fuck Endgame

I. have a lot of issues with it, all of which are major grievances throughout the fandom. I’m pissed they killed Natasha and didn’t even bother giving her a fucking funeral because, I quote from Joe Russo, “Well, Tony does not have another movie. Tony is done. And Natasha has another film. And Marvel Universe obviously does not have to move forward linearly anymore. But that character still has more screen time coming.” (see here) and that annoys the hell out of me. She’s getting another movie - great! So you killed one of the few characters doing her fucking best to keep everything together at the compound, the one who was taking charge, give her a big role, and then murk her and... give her nothing but a brief mention at the end. Like... what the fuck? Natasha deserved so much better than what she was given. Tony’s funeral could’ve (and, frankly, should’ve) been a funeral for him, Natasha, and Vision because god forbid we see anyone mourn Vision other than Wanda

(actually this post covers how Endgame fucked over the MCU women perfectly, though Wanda’s not mentioned :c )

plus... Tony’s not done lol - he’s still a massive figure in the films/shows despite RDJ not acting in them, so his character has left shockwaves that aren’t dying any time soon. Natasha... basically disappeared, and I believe she would’ve been dropped completely if it wasn’t for the fact she does have a film coming out soon. Which, frankly, seems awesome and all, but it’s a film that goes back to post-CACW pre-IW and... frankly doesn’t give me any reason to understand why that means she didn’t get a funeral. She’s not coming back in future movies/shows that are in present MCU timeline - her movie is set in the past. She could’ve gotten a decent sendoff

now, Clint’s arc as Ronin rubs me the wrong way. I know it’s a huge thing in the comics, and it’s not him taking a different mantle that I have an issue with. It’s the fact he, a white man, went around murdering people and got off scot-free. Yes, he was targeting genuinely bad people, but... to show that, they specifically singled out Mexican cartels and the yakuza (Japanese mafia, essentially) - so, in other words, the bad guys were people of color! I feel like I don’t need to explain how fucked up that is. And, to clarify, I love Clint! Clint is honestly one of my favorite characters, and the whole thing was just handled... poorly in the film

Tony’s arc genuinely hurts. This is a man who has suffered for years and has tried to make things right, and finally got a chance to settle down. He finally retired from the Avengers, finally settled down, and had a fucking life he could enjoy despite his ghosts, and yet... His arc ends with a message of “tortured soul finally gets rest by dying”. Because, y’know, it’s great seeing yet another long-suffering character only reaching peace through death, because god forbid they let characters heal! He could’ve still caused the second Snap, and he could’ve survived. He could’ve finally been able to step away for good and focus on his family, focus on recovering, and be truly happy. What’s so wrong with letting him stay alive so he can rest and be with his family? What’s so wrong with letting a long-suffering character finally find peace after one last bang?

plus it pisses me off that they’re now using him as a reasoning as to why bad things are still happening. Why is this person the bad guy? Because Tony Stark somehow may or may not have done something that hurt them! Even though most of that really stems from Howard or Obadiah. Tony just ends up getting the blame in their place. He’s just an easy target to use, much like the tesseract seems to be the go-to answer for why things go wrong. But this is a different train of thought

Steve’s ending pisses me off just as much as the next person lmao. You take a character who has acknowledged he no longer belongs in the past (which, funnily enough, was written by the Russos), aaaaaaand have him go back to the past while ignoring two important people in his life that were still right there. He got Bucky and Sam back, and he leaves them. His arc is ruined within a matter of minutes, and it paints a hella bad picture of him in the process. He goes back in time to stay with Peggy (which ultimately destroys her own arc, and the fact she’s a person outside of her relationship (or lack thereof) with him because, y’know, why have her be able to move on and be her own person?), and we’re supposed to believe he’s fine with everything he knows from the future? Fine with knowing Bucky’s trapped with HYDRA and is suffering as the Winter Soldier? Fine with knowing HYDRA has infested SHIELD from day one? Fine with knowing Howard and Maria are going to die? Fine with royally fucking up the timelines? We’re supposed to believe he sat back and did nothing with all of that? They could’ve had him still hand the shield over to Sam - they could’ve let Steve stay an Avenger without the mantle

also the fact the Russos said he didn’t recognize Red Skull when he returned to Vormir to return the soul stone? Like... what the fuck?? Not to mention he literally returns the stone to Vormir, which “soul for a soul”, and they didn’t bring Nat back that way??

and now onto Thor. Thor... holy fuck is this hitting something personal for me. Thor was ridden with guilt - he was furious with himself, hated himself, and blamed himself for failing to stop the Snap. He fell into a massive depression, and... was promptly danced around as laughing stock. Like, “oh! look at Thor! he’s fat and drunk because he’s depressed haha!” - like fuck off. It’s not funny in any form. His suffering was made into a joke and it pisses me off because I suffer from depression. A lot of people suffer from depression. It’s not funny. It’s fucking terrifying at times. I wasted a shit ton of money on a stupid online sim game because it was a distraction - it gave me... god, I wouldn’t even say temporary happiness, but it gave me something to temporarily help, and I still hate myself for doing it. It was a poor decision on my part, and I wish I could change it. And, during that time, I was scared because I couldn’t see myself pulling out of it. I thought I was gonna feel that way forever. I called out of work multiple times because there were days I couldn’t stop crying (something I still feel horrible for doing), I couldn’t get myself to contact any of my friends for months, and it was all because the medication I was on at the time... stopped working. Thankfully, my depression doesn’t work in a way that makes me a danger to myself, so that wasn’t an issue, but it still fucking sucked. And to see a character that I could relate to on such a personal level treated as laughing stock fucking hurt. I’m not sharing this for sympathy - I’m sharing this because it Thor’s arc hit home and it’s literally the main reason why I will not watch Endgame again

this is more of a nitpick than anything else, but... I didn’t really care for Carol in it tbh? Which is unfortunately because Captain Marvel is one of my absolute favorite movies! And I’m well aware she was introduced in Endgame while CM was being drafted, but that in itself is annoying?? Because Carol was originally going to be introduced in AoU, but was cut because it wasn’t going to introduce her character properly. And yet they decide to introduce her character in a clusterfuck of a movie before her movie is in the final stages, and proceed to release her movie first and then give a complete different characterization in her following appearance

honestly I just wanna cover this now to clarify some things regarding Carter and her backstory: the only reason I keep Endgame as is is because it felt easier for me to do so for the purpose of bending canon for specific threads. I wanted to stay as true to the given plots as possible to help with fudging of both the movies and her background, and also because I didn’t want anyone to feel like I was trying to force my own headcanons onto them, y’know?

I’m just gonna plug this here because fuck it lol, but I did start a fix-it fic regarding Endgame that you can read here! I... probably won’t finish it tbh, and I haven’t gone over it in a hot minute so it might be riddled with errors ahah - plus I’m not sure about how I wrote the characters! I get nervous when writing canon characters because I feel like I’ll miss their characterization completely, which is actually why I,,, rarely rp canon characters dgfjhgsfdhj

also the image in the doc was created by @/archervale!!

#ooc #((I think I covered what I wanted and I hope it makes sense dgjhdfh #I'm pretty tired but I'm doing laundry so I figured I'd answer this while I wait #but yeah I don't care for CACW and I honest to god hate Endgame #the potential is there and it just never reached it))#((I'm not even gonna touch the Russos directing style #'hey guys we're gonna film a wedding sIKE IT'S A FUNERAL'#like?? MAJORLY different event fellas #also I'm literally going off what I remember from Endgame so I'm sure there's QUITE a bit I'm missing #but I'm not watching it to make a bigger salt post lol #I don't hate watch things because I would much rather watch something I'd enjoy #tbh I don't understand hate watching at all but that's a different conversation gsdfjhdfhj))#death mention tw #depression tw

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spectral-musette · 6 years ago

Text

So, the Avengers: Endgame spoiler ban is lifted, and I’ve had a chance to mull over my responses, so I’m finally going to try to write up some thoughts. I was hoping to have seen it again in the interim, but that didn’t work out, so I’m relying on memory from one viewing – it’s possible I’ve missed or misinterpreted things.

Spoilers to follow, so scroll carefully, Ye on Mobile! Also, sorry about the Long Post (TM), I apparently I had a lot to say.

Time-wise, for its 3 hour length, the film didn’t feel long to me. It maintained its momentum and nothing felt laggy or tedious, even the big battles.

Time travel-wise… Okay, positive stuff first. I thought that revisiting the settings of earlier films was absolutely delightful and nostalgic. It felt very satisfying to have those call backs to earlier adventures and cameos of old enemies (Crossbones, Pierce, Zola, and, surprise, even Sitwell). The Cap vs. Cap fight was hilarious, and I loved seeing Steve so utterly exasperated with himself (“I can do this all d-“, “YEAH, I know.”). The scene in the 70’s was good, though some of the Tony and Howard stuff rang a little hollow to me. I think that’s mostly because I’ve always had trouble reconciling Dominic Cooper’s Young Howard Stark (who I’m very fond of, especially after Agent Carter) to the older version of Howard we see in various flashbacks. They look, sound, and act nothing alike; my friends and I always joke that Hydra replaced Howard sometime in the 60’s. So while an aged up Dominic Cooper Howard probably would’ve made me emotional, as it was, I was more moved to see 20 seconds of Jarvis than for all the stuff with Tony talking to his dad about fatherhood.

Using the “Quantum Realm” for time travel was… okay…. Insofar as the “science” of the Ant-Man films has absolutely never made any damn sense (and that’s …. fine. They’re funny and joyful, and I enjoy them a lot anyway. I don’t go to Marvel movies for “realistic” science fiction), throwing time travel into the mix felt like it just might as well happen. I guess I understand why they chose to go with the “nothing we do in the past can affect our own timelines” approach, but frankly it’s still giving me a headache. I also understand not over-explaining, but there’s a middle ground there that wasn’t quite achieved for me. I guess, based on the scene with Tilda Swinton (sorry, haven’t seen Dr. Strange and don’t know her character’s name) and Bruce, we’re supposed to assume that every journey to the past (cue Anastasia music) creates or perhaps just shifts the time traveler into an alternate reality that branches from their original reality at that point? And then when they travel back to the time they started from via the quantum realm, they return to their original version of reality. So the actions that they take in the past affect that alternate reality, but not the reality that they came from and return to. That’s the only thing I can figure out that makes sense to me at all, but unfortunately the film didn’t make that especially clear. Maybe seeing it again would clarify? So this is gonna be a big factor in how I feel about Steve’s ending, but I’ll get to that in a moment.

Also, a tangent re: time travel… While Tony (an engineer) and Bruce (a biologist) are both brilliant, this seems a little outside their areas of expertise! You know, wouldn’t it be great if we had a character who was an astrophysicist who could really tackle this type of thing - OH HEY, we do! I realize that there were probably issues with getting Natalie Portman back in a substantial role, but I love Jane Foster a lot and I would’ve loved seeing her work with Tony and Bruce to save the universe with a handful of Pym Particles.

OKAY, there’s an awful lot to cover, so I’m going to break down some of my feelings by character just to try to stay organized.

(First, a disclaimer that I haven’t seen Captain Marvel yet, so while Carol seemed like a great character, I don’t have a lot to say since I don’t really know her yet. That said, this seemed like an adequate introduction to the character and I am interested to know more. We have the problem of “if Fury could’ve called her anytime why didn’t he call her during the Chitauri attack/to fight Ultron/etc.” But all the individual titles that come after the team-ups have that problem a little bit… Where were the Other Avengers in Thor 2 or Iron-Man 3, etc.? Sometimes you just have to accept and move on.)

Briefly:

Nebula and Gamora, Tony, Bruce, Scott, with a quick note about Wanda and a very conspicuous absence

And the heavier stuff regarding:

Thor, Natasha, and Steve (and Sam and Bucky).

Nebula and Gamora:

While the Guardians aren’t really my thing, I did vaguely know that in the original Infinity Gauntlet comic storyline, Nebula takes the gauntlet from Thanos and fixes reality. I understand not following the comics exactly for the sake of surprise and to fit with the changed version of the universe, but it still felt wrong to totally take that away from her. Especially given what Thanos has done to her, personally, it seemed fitting that she was going to be the one defeat him. I’m glad she was still pivotal to the story, but it felt like an extra kick in the teeth that past!Nebula was the catalyst for Thanos catching up with our heroes rather than getting to be the one who saves the universe. And forcing her to kill her past self felt like it should’ve been treated with much more gravity than it finally was.

I’m really glad we “saved” Gamora by bringing the version of her from the past into the current timeline (however that works), but I feel so bad for anyone who’s really invested in Gamora/Peter Quill. It’s so heartbreaking that their entire history never happened as far as she’s concerned, that we’ve not only removed that very key relationship, but her character growth over the past how many years. It is at least hopeful; Peter remembers, and has the chance to woo her again, but that’s still got to sting.

Tony:

So Tony Stark sure did die.

I’m not sure… he really needed to? I mean I don’t think I get the rationale of the Infinity Gauntlet killing/maiming the user. I recall the handwavey line about gamma radiation, but if you don’t immediately die after using it, couldn’t you juuuust, say, use the Reality Stone to be like, “hey what if I wasn’t mortally injured”? Couldn’t somebody ELSE do that? I’m not sure I get that.

So that said, I’m not sure if RDJ was really pushing for “you gotta kill me off” for dramatic effect or just to step out of the franchise? It would’ve been kinda cool to see retired Tony working as Avenger-support, working on suits for Rhodey and future Iron-heroes (Iron Patriot? Iron Heart?), mentoring Peter and other youths, and living his nice life with Pepper and their munchkin.

But what a way to go, huh? Dramatic self-sacrifice saving the the planet(/universe?), and a funeral that almost everybody who’s anybody shows up for.

Bruce:

I’m with Valkyrie that I preferred EITHER version to PermaHulk Bruce. Honestly, the Hulk himself had sort of become an independent character, especially after Ragnarok (my issues with Ragnarok aside). So by Bruce settling into this “I look like the Hulk but I act like Bruce” limbo, are we … essentially killing the Other Guy? I don’t like that. I mean I prefer Bruce obviously, but I’m really uncomfortable with that solution.

Scott:

I really love Scott and he was delightful as always in this film. I’m heartbroken for him that he missed (another) 5 years of Cassie’s life, though. I’m also pretty sad we won’t get to see the little girl who has played Cassie so far in any future films since we’ve aged the character up to a teenager. Also, I would’ve liked to see more of Hope! I loved Scott and Hope’s little moment when Hope calls Steve “Cap” and they trade expressions between Scott going “SEE, HE IS REALLY COOL, RIGHT?” and Hope being like “Yeah, okay”.

Overall I guess the Ant-Fam is sorta tangential to the main MCU Avengers cast, so while it was nice to have everybody play together, briefly, I’m pretty content that we’ll see more of Hope (and Janet!) in future Ant-Man/Wasp titles.

- Similarly, while T’Challa and the Wakanda fam were definitely underused in Endgame (especially the entirely absent Nakia), Black Panther 2 is happening. It’s disappointing to not get a substantial amount of characters that you like in the big team-up films, but it’s good to know they’ll be returning later.

Wanda:

We are really leaving Wanda in a rough place of having lost her twin brother and her android boyfriend within a pretty short amount of time (that’s rough, buddy). Plus, one of the characters that we’ve seen her have a pretty strong bond with is Steve, and he’s out of the picture too. I’m not sure where we’re going with this character, honestly. Hopefully it’s not continuing to hurt her.

It really seemed conspicuous that nobody so much as mentioned Vision by name in this film. Wanda referred to him indirectly, but that was it. I get that Vision isn’t immediately able to be saved since he didn’t vanish in the Gauntlet event, but, yikes, can anybody besides Wanda please attempt to give a damn about him?

I know sometimes we like to pretend that Age of Ultron didn’t happen to us, but Vision was still an interesting character, and some major plot points of Infinity War focused on the value of Vision as a person. I feel pretty bereft that he’s (apparently) gone beyond recall with so little mourning.

Thor:

*heavy sigh*

Thor’s characterization was….???

Unpopular Opinion: despite its good points, I overall didn’t really like Ragnarok, and Thor already sort of felt out of character to me at that point.

Another Unpopular Opinion: I actually really love The Dark World. Thor’s relationship with Jane, and his characterization of gentleness and humility in that era really were important to me.

And I get that Hemsworth is genuinely good at comedy and probably likes doing it. But Thor has always been a funny character. We just used to be laughing with him instead of at him.

I was so uncomfortable with the way the film framed Thor’s brush with depression and alcoholism. Because Thor has lost so much at this point, he has every reason to struggle. I want to say that Thor wouldn’t have given up, but the same time I can believe that this almost unimaginable weight of loss (Frigga, Odin, Loki, Heimdall, The Warriors Three, Asgard itself) would take some toll. And yet the framing of his scenes treats his grief and despair as cause for humor. We’re expected to laugh about an unkempt beard and a big belly instead of being concerned about the fact that a character that we loved considers himself a failure. And there’s nothing funny about this situation to me. It just made me uncomfortable and sad. Revisiting Thor 2 and having him talk to Frigga was on the better side, but I’m disappointed that we couldn’t save her.

Natasha:

*heavier sigh*

Okay, I think a lot of the problem here is that it’s just really difficult to kill a main character any time other than in the last act (we also saw this problem in Star Wars Rebels, but that’s another can of worms). So because Natasha died at such a midway point in the movie, I still can’t shake the feeling that she’s not really dead. Nothing about it felt final to me. Clint trying to emphasize that, because Red Skull said so, it was impossible to bring her back (it’s freaking RED SKULL, why would we trust him???) just made me think even more that she was definitely coming back. Everything seemed to point to her dramatic reappearance and then it just … didn’t happen. That’s not to say it won’t happen in a future film, though, but it still feels deeply unsatisfying and unceremonious now, and that feeling really was a blow to my overall enjoyment of the film.

It also sat really badly with me that Natasha made this choice not just to save Clint (which I would believe; their friendship is really great and I love seeing Natasha’s extremely profound but non-romantic bonds with Clint and with Steve (though I would’ve preferred Natasha/Clint to Natasha/Bruce)), but because she fundamentally felt less worthy than Clint. I don’t like the idea that Natasha went to her death still feeling such guilt, still feeling like a monster (according to that awful scene in AoU), for the things she did as a very young person under the influence of brainwashing. I don’t like that at all.

I’m also really disappointed that we didn’t pursue Natasha and Bucky’s relationship from the comics in the MCU. Because the idea of two people with very similar emotional wounds coming together to support each other as they heal is just really appealing (#looking for baggage that goes with mine). That throwaway line in Civil War (“at least you could recognize me”) really had me convinced that we were going there. I guess we still could, but there are a lot of “ifs” standing in the way now.

Steve:

Another disclaimer: Steve is absolutely my favorite Avenger, and I ship Steve/Peggy really hard.

Aaand I still felt uncomfortable with the resolution.

Maybe it’s just the difficulty I’ve been having getting my head around the time travel shenanigans.

So a lot of the criticisms I’ve heard/read about Steve going back to the 1940’s to Peggy seems to be functioning under the assumption that Steve is living within the timeline as we know it in MCU canon, staying completely hidden, and just not changing any of the bad things that canonically happen: Bucky becoming the Winter Soldier, Hydra infiltrating SHIELD, etc.

But we’ve been told that time travel doesn’t work that way – that Back To The Future, Doctor Who way – in this universe, right? This brings me back to my Alternate Reality take. So my understanding is that after Steve returns the infinity stones to the points in time that the Avengers yoinked them from, he basically occupies an Alternate Reality for a lifetime (Tilda Swinton’s thing about the branched off timelines being consumed by the ~forces of darkness~ only applies IF the infinity stones aren’t returned, and he took care of that). And he could’ve done anything in that Alternate Reality – married Peggy, saved Bucky from Hydra, prevented any wars and disasters he could. Basically it was Steve’s own personal Happiness AU. And then, (presumably after Peggy’s death), he uses the Pym particles and the Quantum Realm to return to his original reality.

Except, in that case, shouldn’t he have returned on the platform instead of dramatically showing up on that park bench?

So…I’m confused and I don’t like it.

Even from the Alternate Reality take, the situation of that choice is complicated. In choosing to be with Peggy, he’s tearing himself out of the lives of all of his loved ones in his Original Reality – Bucky, Sam, Wanda, (whatever the situation was with Sharon Carter that we absolutely never resolved?), etc.

And we’re not completely sure it was a choice, exactly. It’s possible that in the ongoing work to return the infinity stones, Steve somehow got trapped in the past (don’t know why he would’ve had to go to the 40’s, but I guess he could’ve run out of Pym particles there and had to wait for Hank to invent them to even be able to make the trip back).

Also, narratively speaking, it feels a little like we’re invalidating Peggy’s grief, and her character growth that went on in Agent Carter (even if her happy ending with Steve is going on in an Alternate Reality). I wasn’t totally sold on Peggy and Daniel Sousa yet (though I do like Daniel as a character a lot), but Peggy had a whole lifetime that didn’t involve Steve except as a beloved memory. Where is she in that arc when Time Traveler Steve comes back into her life?

Also, even if it IS an Alternate Reality, there would STILL be a version of Steve frozen in the ice in the 1940’s in that reality. How do we deal with that?

And how do we deal with the fact that Steve isn’t the man that Peggy lost anymore. He still loves her, but he’s changed, he’s lived almost a decade since then. How do they find their footing with each other? I’m sure it isn’t impossible, but it’s interesting, and it’s not addressed at all.

I think that’s what bothers me the most – that this is a whole huge adventure – Steve’s entire LIFE – that we’re shoehorning in at the very end of the movie without showing any of the really interesting bits or answering any of our questions about it. I guess that leaves the situation as a fertile ground for the imagination, and maybe that’s a space that the MCU intends to explore someday? I would absolutely watch the hell out of Steve’s Time Travel Romance with Peggy, somebody take my goddamn money.

Anyway, I’m happy about Sam taking up the Shield as Captain America. Bucky-Cap also could’ve been great, but I feel like, with the place we left Bucky in his recovery, he doesn’t need that responsibility yet. Let him rest. Wherever we’re going with the series featuring Sam and Bucky is going to be really interesting, and maybe we’ll get to the point where Bucky really wants to work towards atonement and is ready to share the burden of the Shield with Sam? I’m looking forward to finding out.

Overall, most of my feelings about the movie were pretty positive. It was a complicated story to tell with a lot of characters, and mostly it was handled pretty well. Some of those threads did fall flat for me, but they didn’t totally invalidate the parts of the movie that worked.

#spoilers #Avengers Endgame spoilers #Endgame spoilers #long post #I had in my outline that I was going to talk about Clint #but I accidentally skipped that #it's briefly in Natasha's section #I could go into it more but this is already too long

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rightisntalwayseasy · 6 years ago

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My thoughts on Endgame

Obviously, Spoilers under the cut.

I SAID SPOILERS

For the most part, I enjoyed it. It is not my favorite, but it was a nice bookend to the current Phases of the MCU.

I loved Barton. He was a badass through and through, and I related because I do would go on an endless five year murder spree if I lost my family, blood or chosen. I loved his fight with Natasha, and I loved his INK, oh my god did I love his ink. I still don’t like the family they gave him, cause I’d rather have Clintasha and a dog, but for the MCU, it ended pretty solidly, so I was here for it. I was also here because WE GOT HAWKEYE A LOT and it was good.

I loved Professor Hulk. My boyfriend, who is my Bruce, did not, but I understand his reasoning. I loved how mellow he was, it was great. and I loved his astral form with the Ancient One. Basically my boy Hulk did no wrong, and I loved that he was so genuinely confused with the Ant Man scene where he kept shifting ages.

I liked that Tony got a child. But there was no way he was going to get to keep her, so either the time jump was going to erase her, or he was going to die. Not that surprising. She was still a sweetheart, and I adored her. I disliked how About Tony this movie was. It was a split between Iron Man 5 and Civil War: Here We Go Again. But again, that hasn’t surprised me since RDJ has been the face of the MCU. And I’m glad his time is over, so he can rest. And give the rest of the characters a chance. I also have disliked Gwenyth Paltrow as Pepper Potts for a while, but that’s a personal taste thing.

PTSD!Thor was exactly what I was expecting- and more. And so very fucking relatable. I’ve been there, done that, got several T-Shirts, and to see him be redeemed by the end, to still be worthy of his hammers, to still be able to get his braids and his armor and battle it with the rest was stunning and amazing, and I’m so proud of him for listening to his mother.

Frigga is an amazing mother.

Loki is a little shit. And I don’t like that they left the plot hole open with him having the Tessract again. it was so in character, but goddammit, just stop that. And going back to the 70s to fix it? Look, another opportunity for Tony to be the focus (even with the lazy effort to bring Peggy back into the mix for Steve. More on that later). I did love the little Jarvis cameo, because my SWEET BRITISH BABY.

Natasha is my other brain cell from Marvel. She is my self when I talk to my boyfriend when I’m not being Steve (we are several characters to each other. it’s great). I loved her arch. i love that she took command, and that others listened to her. I love that she grew out her hair and had two toned hair because she was doing so much. And as much as it hurt me, I love that she was the one who gave herself up for the soul stone, to save everyone else. I knew it was coming but goddamn. I’m proud of my girl. She did so much good.

There was not nearly enough Carol Danvers in this movie. BUT I GOT MY SHORT HAIRED CAPTAIN MARVEL, AND I AM IN LOVE THANKS I’M TOO BI FOR THIS.

And then we come to my beloved Steve Rogers. My sweet, idiot, amazingly powerful and worthy bean. WHO CARRIED AND FOUGHT THANOS WITH A BROKEN SHIELD AND MJOLNIR. Who was my flannel wearing badass bi. Who Who admired his own ass. Who kept fighting no matter what. Who bestest HYDRA at their own game. Who I loved throughout this whole movie. So much. EXCEPT. E X C E P T. for that final fucking scene. Which was so much BULLSHIT to me.

I love Steggy. I love it so much. Peggy Carter is a goddess and I adore her. HOWEVER.

there has only been prolonged romance between Steve and Peggy in the movies. After the ice, he was alone. Then in CA: TWS he found her, but she was dying, so he was comfort (enter the poorly contrived film relationship with Sharon), and he found Bucky again. In CACW she died, and he went to her funeral. And he found Bucky again, and put him under in Wakanda. At least in Infinity war, we got a little bit of their relationship (Steve’s and Bucky’s), but again, there were more important things. And then Bucky got dusted, as did Sam. Steve lost most of the family he had left AGAIN.

SO FOR HIM TO UP AND GO BACK IN TIME AFTER RETURNING THE STONES TO LIVE OUT HIS LIFE WITH PEGGY GODDAMN CARTER WAS A LAZY AND HALF ASSED ATTEMPT TO FORCE A HETERO RELATION SHIP WITH PEGGY CARTER JUST TO AVOID MORE AFFECTION WITH BUCKY AFTER BUCKY HAD JUST GOTTEN BACK WAS ANGRYING. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE “I took Tony’s advice and got some life.” (when has he ever taken Tony’s advice?) Because he was there for the lecture. he knew that multiple timelines could happen. And I’ve had some argue to me that he and Bucky probably had some time together before Steve returned the stones, but it wasn’t on screen so it doesn’t fucking count. (also here’s more thoughts here https://www.thewrap.com/avengers-endgame-that-final-captain-america-scene-makes-no-sense-peggy-carter-time-retirement/ )

I had 0 problem with Sam getting the shield though. He’s ready and he deserves it, and I’m very proud of him, cannot wait for Falcon!Cap.

But that leads me to my other issue. They didn’t give us any proper time to celebrate the return of the Dusted, except for Peter, but that was just so Peter could have a tearful farewell with Tony. Again, all about Tony. and Loki, who was supposed to be dead and gone, had more screen time and lines than Bucky, or half of the other Dusted. (though T’Challa and Wanda are badasses and i want to be them when I grow up.)

IDK. I know Marvel is a bunch of cowards, but you don’t even need to give me sappy Stucky. Just let them be close, let them be friends, LET THEM BE EACH OTHER’S FAMILY. STOP MAKING US SIT THROUGH PAINFULLY CONTRIVED HETERO ROMANCES, WHEN THIS ONE PRACTICALLY WROTE ITSELF.

and if one more person says “well they weren’t gay in the comics” i’m gonna deck someone. If one more person tells me that we don’t need more LGBT superheroes, I’m gonna ask why not, because so far we’ve had bit players, or “assumed” LBGTQ characters (looking at you Captain Marvel), but we have not had leading role LGBTQ characters. Except for Deadpool 1 and 2, but the MCU doesn’t get credit for that.

SO GIVE ME MY QUEER SUPER HEROES YOU COWARDS.

but over all I’d give it probably a 6.5/7 out of ten. Marvel still owns my ass, but I’m gonna be all about the Buckys and Sams and Bruces for a bit. I’ll still play with Peggys, but I’m real upset ALSO about how they used her as a romantic interest and only that continually in the MCU, with a small exception for her role in Agent Carter.

ANYHOW. i’m done. if you got spoiled by this, I’m not sorry. there were warnings. And ya’ll can keep your disagreements to yourself, thanks.

#avengers endgame #a4: endgame #endgame #endgame spoilers #this is not spoiler free

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sage-nebula · 6 years ago

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I saw Endgame

And overall I liked it, although I think I liked Infinity War more. I really want to make a long post detailing all my feelings in a coherent way, but I’m not sure I’m in the headspace to do it now, and I can’t do it at a later date because the memories won’t be as fresh, so I’m just going to make a list that might be all over the place beneath the cut (with TREMENDOUS SPOILERS, obviously).

Things I Loved:

Peter was the catalyst for Tony deciding to help with the time machine business. This isn’t specifically stated, it’s not said out loud, but it didn’t have to be. Tony turned Steve and the others down. He flat out refused to help them. But when he caught sight of that photo of him and Peter? When he remembered just who he had lost? That was when he decided to see if he could find a way to make time travel work. Peter was his motivation. I think that for the most part he was repressing his grief over Peter (and more on that in a bit), but he couldn’t repress it entirely, not when a photo of Peter being so exuberant and happy was staring him right in the face. If there was any glimmer of hope at getting Peter back, Tony was going to take it. Yeah, he cared about the trillions of others, too---but Peter was the catalyst, Peter was the reason he was willing to take the risk, and I loved that.

THE REUNION HUG. Honestly, this should have been first on my list, but I’m not going to erase the above paragraph. GOD, if I don’t get ten million gifsets of both that hug, and also how it’s development from the “this is not a hug, we’re not there yet” scene in Homecoming, I’m going to lose my mind. Fuck, the fact that Tony couldn’t even speak, the fact that he just pulled Peter into his arms and hugged him so tightly, hugged him tighter when Peter said “this feels nice” was just everything to me. I could watch that for ten hours. Also, Peter’s rambling preceding the hug was fucking adorable. “Do you remember when we were in space? And I got all dusty and then I must have passed out or something because I woke up and you were gone, but Dr Strange was there and he said five years had passed and we had to go---” NO WONDER TONY HUGGED THE BUHJEEZUS OUT OF HIM. HE HASN’T HEARD THAT RAMBLING FOR FIVE YEARS, DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HE MISSED HIS BOY? NO WORDS NEEDED TO BE SAID THERE. THAT HUG SAID IT ALL.

Peter in general, honestly. Tom Holland didn’t get to do very much in this movie, for obvious reasons, but he stole every single goddamn scene he was in. The reunion rambling, everything he said while he had the gauntlet and was trying to get it to the van, THE FACT THAT HE GOT A MOMENT WITH PEPPER WHERE SHE SAVED HIM, his scream when he was on Valkyrie’s pegasus, and of course the heartbroken sobbing when Tony died. I do wish that Tony had been more coherent at that point, that he’d been able to tell Peter that he was proud of him, and I also kind of wish that Peter hadn’t called him “Tony” because I’m going to be real with you, I like how he calls him “Mr Stark.” But everything else about it was perfect, including the bit where Rhodey had to pull Peter away because Peter was just falling to pieces. (And note, I mean as perfect as it can get given that Tony died, but you know.)

The fear in Thanos’ eyes when he headbutted Carol and she didn’t even FLINCH. I do have some issues with Carol’s (lack of) involvement in this movie, which I’ll get to later, but while it was unrealistic that Thanos got the jump on her at any point (please), the fact that she didn’t flinch when he headbutted her and just the TRUE FEAR IN HIS EYES KJFDSKFJDS. GOD. I love Carol so much. Oh Captain, My Captain.

Morgan requesting a cheeseburger, just like her daddy, and Happy saying he’ll get her all the cheeseburgers she wants. I don’t even have anything to add onto this. It just made me cry even more than I already was.

Loki stealing the Tesseract (AGAIN) as a way to bring him back. Apparently Loki is going to be in a new TV show streaming on Disney’s service (whether it’s the same one Sam and Bucky are going to have, I’m not sure), so this was a clever way to ensure that Loki can make a comeback in the future without having to have found a way to revive him, and only him, from Infinity War. Of course, this also means that the Loki we see in the TV show or whatever won’t have any of the character development post-Avengers, which is . . . eh . . . but it’s better than having him be permanently dead, I guess. (Also, did anyone tell Thor this happened? No? Someone might want to fill him in so he can be cautious when picking up snakes for the foreseeable future.)

Thor getting Mjolnir back, and then dual wielding. Though the dual wielding was more temporary than I would have liked (more on that in a bit, too), I love dual wielding so I was happy to see him doing it, and also I love Mjolnir (a.k.a. “mya-mya”) so I was happy to see that back, too. It put a definite smile on my face.

Valkyrie being the new Queen of Asgard. No offense to Thor, because I get that he was going through a lot, but he was also being a terrible king, particularly since I don’t think he ever really wanted to be king, anyway. Like he accepted the duty because he felt he had to, not because he wanted to, and so I think it’s good that he’s going to get out there and see new parts of the universe (and hopefully clean himself up some, and also not actually answer to Quill because I mean, come on). That said, Valkyrie was the one keeping everything in order, and she deserves to be queen. I love her. I’m so happy for her.

All the ladies coming forward to back up Carol. I mean, Carol doesn’t really need backup, but I looooved seeing all the ladies assemble ready to beat some fucking ass. The MCU has such powerful women and a good number of them, too, and I love that that was highlighted in that moment of this film. It was a great moment.

Nebula’s character development. She’s had such an arc despite being in so few movies and I love it. I loved how invested she was in the paper football game she played with Tony. I love how she took care of him, even in gentle ways such as moving him off the floor and onto a chair. I love how she killed her past self in order to save Gamora without a second of hesitation, as well as how she talked Gamora into turning against Thanos long before it happened in the timeline we know. (On that note, I’m fine with how they’re keeping Gamora in the picture, and I laughed at her “whomst” expression when Quill approached her jkdlsfds.) Nebula had a great arc and I loved it, although I can’t believe she didn’t warn Natasha and Clint about how they’d have to get the Soul Stone. Like, she knew. Why didn’t she say anything?

Sam getting a private goodbye with Steve, and having the shield passed onto him. I’m okay with the fact that Steve did get a happy ending. I always shipped him with Peggy and I think that, overall, he was just not happy in our time period, even if he had some moments of happiness, so I think that being able to go back in time and live the life he actually wanted was a good ending for him. But I’m also glad that Sam got that private goodbye, as well as the shield, because Sam goddamn deserved that after everything he’s been through and everything he gave to Steve’s cause. Sam doesn’t get enough respect in-universe or out of it, so I was glad to see him get this. On that note, I also like the fact that Bucky knew before Steve even left that Steve wasn’t coming back, and that he was the one to draw Sam away and point him to where he needed to be.

There’s probably more that deserves to be in this list, but these are the only things I can think of right now. More can always be added later, especially if / when I see the movie a second time.

Things I’m Okay With:

Tony’s death. I know this sounds like a weird thing to be okay with, but hear me out. Obviously, my preference would be for Tony to be alive, and still making appearances in future movies, such as Far From Home. But the thing is, we already know that he’s not going to be in Far From Home. He’s not in any of the trailers, it’s been confirmed again and again that he’s not in that movie. We know that Peter is still involved with Stark Industries and the Stark family, but Tony himself is not around. And fam, the only way that makes sense from a character standpoint is if Tony is dead. Tony retiring from being Iron Man wouldn’t necessitate him taking himself out of Peter’s life. He just wouldn’t do that, not after he already lived five years without him because of the snap. So if Tony were alive, but he just decided, “I’ve got my own kid now, I don’t need Peter anymore”? That would be so disgustingly out of character I’d drop all future movies in . . . well, a snap. So in that sense, I’m okay with Tony dying since RDJ didn’t want to do any future movies, and if he’s not doing future movies and isn’t going to be in Peter’s life anymore, then the only way that makes sense without assassinating his character is to assassinate him. It’s sad and I cried, but at least this doesn’t destroy Iron Dad & Spider-Son, which, as selfish as this may sound, is what’s most important to me. I can live with this, especially since fanfic exists for this very reason.

Carol’s lack of presence in the movie. This is very nearly a “Thing I Didn’t Like,” but I’m putting it here because I understand it. Thing is, Carol is too strong for Thanos. Carol could atomize Thanos if she was allowed to do so. And forget Thanos; Carol could take out literally every member of his army in a second if she was allowed to do so. The thing is, that also takes all stakes out of the movie, as well as negates the need for Tony to make the heroic sacrifice he did. And while they did weaken her a little and let Thanos overpower her for a second (unrealistic tbh), they couldn’t weaken her enough to conceivably have her not end that battle, and as such they just took her out of the movie entirely, for the most part, with the excuse that “other planets need me and they don’t have you.” And like, again, I get it. Carol is too OP. If she stuck around the movie would have been a lot shorter. But at the same time it bummed me out because she’s my favorite hero, so I did want to see her doing more things than what she was allowed to do.

The lack of quantity of Iron Dad & Spider-Son. Don’t get me wrong, quality wise it was almost perfect. The only way it could have been more perfect would be if Tony had managed to tell Peter that he was proud of him while he was dying (especially since Peter apologized to Tony, meaning that Peter blames himself for Tony’s death), and if, when telling Steve that they had to keep what they’d gained in the past five years at all costs, Tony had explained his reasoning as, “I already lost one kid. I’m not gonna lose another.” My entire year would have been made had Tony said that line. The literal entire thing. But while the quality was great, I do wish that we could have felt Peter’s presence more in Tony’s life. Like, again, Peter was the catalyst for Tony getting involved at all, and that was great, but I just wanted . . . more. There was a lot going on in this movie, and I get that, and there’s also the fact that I got the feeling that Tony repressed what happened with Peter hard over the past five years, that he had to repress it or else he wouldn’t have been able to function. Like part of me was surprised that no one brought up Peter when they were trying to get Tony to help with the time machine, but at the same time I also think that Steve at the least knew they’d get hit if they did that. But I felt a lot of repression going on, repression that was ripped off once Tony caught sight of that picture, but at the same time once that repression was ended I kind of wish the floodgates had opened. I wish that Tony would have had the line about not wanting to lose another kid. I wish that when thinking about time traveling back to New York, there would have been a moment when Tony would think about returning to New York during a time when Peter Parker was still alive. I wish that Tony would have made mention after Bruce’s snap about Peter being stuck in space, or that he would have told Peter at the end that he was proud of him, or that Peter would have been present during the final message hologram, and so on and so forth. I’m okay with what little we got because it was excellent, there was a lot going on, and also Tony was repressing (with the floodgates truly opening once Peter was babbling in front of him again), but since this was our absolute last chance to get Iron Dad & Spider-Son with both of them alive, I really do wish we had gotten more. I’m okay with it, but I’m still kind of sad.

Bruce being Hulk physically all the time now. This is also almost a “didn’t like,” because it’s just . . . weird . . . but I’m also okay with it, I guess. He reminded me of Beast from X-Men, and I didn’t really see a reason for him to be like this, especially since we’re just told how he got to that point, rather than shown. It was just kind of . . . weird. It could have been done better.

Thor traveling with the Guardians. I kind of hope this is just a temporary thing, because as I mentioned, I don’t very much like the idea of him answering to Quill, and I also feel like he’s less of a team player and more of a solo artist. I’m okay with it for now because at least he’s not dead or wallowing anymore, and also it means that Valkyrie gets to be Queen of New Asgard, but I really hope it’s just temporary because he deserves more than to be just another crew member on that ship.

Again, more could probably go here, but this is what I’ve got for now.

Things I Didn’t Like:

Steve wielding Mjolnir. I get that this was a callback to Age of Ultron, and specifically the scene where they all tried to wield Mjolnir and couldn’t, but it did tremble a bit under Steve’s grasp, but I didn’t like it. I don’t hate Steve, by any means, but particularly after all that shit in Civil War I don’t think he’s worthy, and it also doesn’t make a lot of sense to me that he just magically knows how to flawlessly use Mjolnir with no practice or training. Sure, Thor picked it up quickly, but Thor is also an Asgardian. It doesn’t make sense that Steve, a human, would know how. And also, Thor’s “I knew it!” was strange, considering he seemed anxious about the possibility of Steve being able to wield Mjolnir in Age of Ultron. Like it was just . . . I didn’t like it. Especially since it cut so much into Thor’s dual wielding time. On that note . . .

Thor. Just . . . Thor all around. Aside from how his “let himself go” look was his look for the entire movie, I felt like his portrayal in this movie was really . . . shallow, flat, and lacked all of the emotional weight he carried in Infinity War. Like in Infinity War he was raw with grief, he’d just lost everyone, and you could feel that in every action he took. And yeah, he felt that he failed at the end of that movie, even though he did kill Thanos, so it makes sense that he’d need time to process that grief. But five years of processing led him to lose all the emotional weight he had originally. Like, we were supposed to get the feeling that this was Thor grieving, but it just didn’t feel that way. Moreover, it felt like they were trying to bring in Ragnarok flavored humor with him, but it didn’t work because it didn’t fit the tone of the movie. I usually love Thor, he’s always been one of my faves, but I just was not vibing with him in this movie. The dual wielding was cool, as was his excitement to get Mjonir back, but the rest of it? Bleh.

Natasha’s death. I mean, I get it on some level. I get that she didn’t have a family to go back to, whereas Clint did. I get that Scarlett Johansson probably didn’t want to do any more MCU movies / her contract was up. But that doesn’t make me feel any more okay that yet another woman was fridged so that Clint could have some manpain. It doesn’t make feel any more okay that a character who actually routinely did things and contributed in these movies (Nat) was sacrificed for one who pretty much never does anything ever (Clint). To be fair, far more male characters were removed from the cast in this movie than female ones, but that doesn’t make this jive with me any more. I was totally rooting for Clint to bite it instead. Like let him do something for once in these movies, ffs.

Harley being present at Tony’s funeral. Look, I’m going to be honest: Harley had no reason to be there. I get that he was in Iron Man 3 and that he was like the prototype for the Iron Dad we’d all come to love, but that’s the thing: He was the prototype, he was like foreshadowing. From a narrative perspective, Harley’s purpose was to foreshadow how Tony was with kids, so that when he met Peter in Civil War and came to bond with him over the course of the following films, we’d be able to see where that paternal side of Tony came from. There’s a reason why Harley was not seen or mentioned after Iron Man 3, and it’s because his narrative purpose was fulfilled, and therefore Tony presumably didn’t have any further contact with him after that. And I mean, no offense to those who liked Harley or his role in Iron Man 3, but the Tony & Harley relationship was not the one that was developed over the course of the following movies. Again, he wasn’t shown, nor was he even mentioned. Instead, it was Tony & Peter in Civil War, Homecoming, and Infinity War. Harley might as well have not even existed. The only reason I even recognized him was because I knew ahead of time that he was going to be in the film. My best friend (who I saw the movie with) didn’t even recognize him and was wondering who tf he was. So to that end, I just . . . I don’t think it was necessary for him to be there. Like it felt more like a move for us, the audience, of them saying “see, Tony impacted all these people, everyone who was important at some point in his life is there.” But it didn’t even really work that way because the funeral was so small and private. So it just seemed really random for Harley to be there, when he hasn’t been relevant at all since Iron Man 3. And I know it’s not that big a deal and I honestly wouldn’t care, except every time I see something about “Morgan and her big brother Harley” or “Tony’s three kids” I can’t help but roll my eyes because, no. There was nothing post-Iron Man 3 that would lead us to believe that Tony considered Harley to be like a son to him. The fact that Harley was standing awkwardly way in the back at the funeral, instead of up front where Peter and Morgan were, says it all. If Harley had been present in movies following Iron Man 3 and we actually saw his relationship with Tony on-screen, okay, fine. But that’s clearly not the case, and wasn’t even in the case in this movie (like he was clearly not around for those five years!) so it just . . . I don’t know. It felt really unnecessary to me. I’m not a fan. (And I know some people are like, “He’s going to pick up the mantle from Tony, he’s going to be Iron Lad!” which gets a very hard no from me, for two reasons: 1.) If anyone is picking up the torch from Tony, it’s Peter. Peter has been Tony’s protégé for the past several movies, Peter is the one that the Russos have specifically said had a father-son relationship with Tony, Peter is the one that Tony made tech for and trained, the one who was sobbing by his side when he died. If anyone is picking up the torch from Tony, it’s Peter. 2.) If it’s not Peter, it’s Tony’s biological daughter Morgan. Yes, she’s too young now, but give her some time and she’d make a fantastic Iron Lady, or even Ironheart if they don’t want to introduce Riri. Morgan has far more reason to pick up that mantle than Harley does, just like Peter. Send Harley back to Tennessee where he belongs and stop acting like he’s super mega important when he clearly wasn’t important enough to even get name dropped after his initial appearance in any of the movies before this one. Jesus.)

Thanos going from “you drew blood from me, I respect that” to “you keep resisting me so I’m going to enjoy killing you.” Like, it just made him seem so petty? I feel like it would have made more sense for him to make the jump to “I’ll kill EVERYONE and make a WHOLE NEW UNIVERSE this time” if his rationale was “I can’t have anyone around trying to undo what I do.” It would have felt more in line with his characterization from Infinity War. I get it, Thanos is a sociopath, no one is arguing with that. But he wasn’t a petty sociopath in Infinity War, so it feels a bit disappointing to me that they made him such a petty, smug bastard in Endgame. I liked him more when he was acting like a Well-Intentioned (In His Mind) Extremist than a Petty Purple Bitch.

And once again, there could possibly be more here, but this is all I can think of for now.

All in all, I did like it, just not as much as I liked Infinity War, and that probably has to do with (as I said) the fact that Infinity War had more Iron Dad & Spider-Son content / interactions, and that’s my favorite relationship in the whole MCU, so obviously I’m going to prefer the movies where that’s a bigger focus. But I did like Endgame well enough all the same, and I can’t wait for Far From Home this summer. And on that note, some wishes for it:

The reason why Peter doesn’t have the Iron Spider suit in Far From Home is because it hurts too badly to wear / he doesn’t feel like he deserves it after what happened to Tony. I want to see his grief over Tony’s death brought up.

An AI / hologram message that Tony made for Peter at some point.

May to not date Happy, but instead to bond with Pepper, and for them to eventually find love again in each other’s arms and get married so that Peter and Morgan can be official stepsiblings. (Like Peter is Morgan’s big brother anyway, but this would make it Official™.) Happy can date someone else. (Also I know that May is Peter’s aunt and not his mom, technically, but come on. She might as well be his mom.)

But that’s it for now. Time to go nurse the pain with some fics (including potentially a couple of my own.)

#mcu #endgame #avengers endgame #irondad and spiderson #mcu spoilers #avengers spoilers #endgame spoilers #avengers endgame spoilers #avengers 4 spoilers #irondad & spiderson

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chopperpirate · 6 years ago

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MCU Retrospective

I've decided to, in honor of Avengers Endgame, write about my thoughts on the MCU as a whole. Well, obviously I love it, but am cautiously optimistic about its future. It's easily one of my favorite film franchises, and though I don't think it ever really reaches the highs of The Dark Knight, it's better than any other Superhero related thing in the realm of Live-Action film, with the only things like Logan and The Dark Knight surpassing it in my heart. I still think DC animated films can sometimes be better, but it shouldn't be a competition.

I've been seeing people participating in this "One Marvelous Scene" thing lately, so I'll do that as well after ranking every MCU film I've seen from best to worst. I won't bore you with too much writing, though because I know I'll get flack, I'll try to justify my top and bottom 5 with some comments. With that said, here's Chopperpirate Mun's MCU film ranking!

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 - Anyone who knows me knows how much I love things that value the connections between ragtag "nakama" who aren't related by blood, but were brought together by circumstance and are now the closest thing each member has to family. Not to mention that this film has emotional payoffs for Nebula and Gamora's heartfelt rivalry, Rocket's tsundere hangups, and Peter's heritage that I'd say are all easily the most emotional resonant things out of the MCU. The comedy in the film is probably only rivaled by Thor: Ragnarok. My two personal favorite jokes being the Mary Poppins bit, and Drax shouting "MANTIS! LOOK OUT!" mere seconds after Mantis was already hit and knocked unconscious.

The highlight for comedy is easily Drax, but his speech to Mantis about why her perceived ugliness is a good thing because if someone loves you despite your ugliness, they love you for who you are, really might be one of my favorite moments in the film. Same with Yondu's speech to Rocket about how they're the same. Believe it or not, I cried more during Yondu's death than I did for Tony Stark's in Endgame. I can't really tell you why. Something about his last line just reminded me of Whitebeard from One Piece.

Yondu's death scene aside, my favorite scene in the film is easily when he, Groot, and Rocket are slaughtering the traitor Ravengers to the tune of "Come a Little Bit Closer."

On that note, the villains of this film are some of the best. They aren't bland, generic evil points of contention for the film to have a climax! Taser Face is hilarious, The Sovereign are hilariously arrogant and I find the fact that they only engage in combat through arcade simulations to be perfect for their personalities, and Ego might be the best Marvel Villain besides Loki up until that point in the MCU. The reveal that he killed Meredith was shocking, and might very well be the best "Wham Line" in the MCU to this date. His death scene showed a lot of depth to Peter, and like a good villain, he had a lot of parallels and contrasts to the protagonist instead of just having a clone of their abilities for the sake of a final boss fight.

The Winter Soldier - Captain America at his finest. Bucky was awesome, Black Widow was finally given a lot of vulnerabilities and depth as she bonded with Steve, Falcon was alright, HYDRA as a collective is an amazing source of paranoia fuel, and this movie might have the best action out of any MCU film, or at least my personal favorite brand of action. Instead of CG magic and shit, we get to see visceral knife fights, punches, kicks, and close-quarters martial arts. It's surprisingly brutal for a PG-13 film. I recall one point where Bucky kicks a SHIELD agent into a helicopter propeller.

As for my favorite scene in this film, I'd have to say it's the Elevator sequence. The build up was perfectly suspenseful, and the payoff of the line "Before we get started, does anyone want to get off?" felt badass and perfect for the character of Captain America, who, instead of being snide or arrogant, shows that he's ready to fight, while willing to let his enemies back out if they so choose.

This film might also be Nick Fury's finest. I was very disappointed that Captain Marvel didn't enhance the character more than this film did, but oh well. The way Fury communicated words with Steve while showing him what he really meant through writing was clever while also perfectly exemplifying his character. Fury is very secretive, never showing vulnerability or letting himself get attached to others, yet we can tell from his actions and concerns that he is a good person, even if he isn't a nice person. The way he says one meaningless thing while displaying another more pressing thought really shows that the Russos understood the character.

Infinity War - The Empire Strikes Back of the MCU. Thanos is an amazing villain protagonist, and arguably the only character with a full arc in this film, Gamora is probably at her most interesting here, and a lot of the interactions between characters who never got to interact before this film are some of my favorites. I'm especially fond of the chemistry between Doctor Strange and Tony Stark.

Despite how dark and serious this film is, it understands how to keep up dramatic tension while never losing its sense of humor. The same film with Vision dying willingly and pointlessly at the hands of his lover is the film with lines like "Why is Gamora" and "I am Steve Rogers." It's probably the most perfect film in the MCU in terms of story structure and emotional stakes. It's just lower than the ot hers because it lacks the personal love from me that the above films had.

Avengers: Endgame - Now that I've had time to stew on it, this film isn't as good as Infinity War, but it's still great. To clarify, Infinity War was a better structured film and a more entertaining one for the most part. I'd say the first two acts of Endgame were somewhat weak by comparison, but the final 1/3 was so perfect that it almost tempted me to rank it above Infinity War, even if Captain Marvel's presence ruins a lot of things.

I want to remain positive for the most part here, so I won't talk about too many of my gripes, but because I know I'll get asked why I think Captain Marvel ruins the stakes, let me explain. In the MCU, Captain Marvel can canonically move at Lightspeed, and probably faster too. So... when she got the Infinity Gauntlet in the final act's little "Hot Potato" portion, why didn't she just fly to another galaxy and hide the gauntlet away with some trusted civilization, come back to help defeat Thanos' army, then bring the gauntlet back to return the stones to their timelines? Remember, because of this plot hole of MCU Carol Danvers being so overpowered and fast, yet not doing anything to help, Tony Stark is dead. � We know the meta reason is because RDJ and most of the Phase 1 actors are done, but you guys can now totally blame Captain Marvel for it In-Universe.

Positives though! This film made me genuinely love Nebula. She fits so well with The Avengers (arguably better than with the GotG), and the small details of her pity and attachment to Thanos during his early death adds a lot of pathos to her character. Thor's "Big Lebowski" phase was hilarious, Tony and Thor getting closure with their dad/mom respectively was sweet, and the final battle was one of the greatest spectacles to behold. I don't know if it's controversial or not, but I personally loved that Captain America got his happy ending (even if it creates a huge plot hole with this movie's time travel rules). It just lacked the oomph of Infinity War.

Thor Ragnarok - This film saved Thor, made him entertaining and interesting, and gave us yet another great villain in the form of The Grandmaster! It has a similar issue, villain-wise, in my opinion, to Black Panther, in that the secondary villain is far more entertaining than the main villain. Great comedy, Loki's redemption is emotionally fulfilling, and Korg is my MCU waifu. My only issue is that Hela is kind of boring, and the stuff on Sakaar is far more engaging than the "important" plot.

Guardians of the Galaxy The Avengers Spider-Man: Homecoming Iron Man Doctor Strange Captain America: Civil War Iron Man 3 Ant-Man Ant-Man and the Wasp Captain America: The First Avenger Iron Man 2 Black Panther - Very overrated. T'Challa is far less interesting here than he was in Civil War, Wakanda is far better in Infinity War... Really, it's not a "bad" movie. It's just not that special. It's more comparable to the Phase 1 films between Iron Man and Avengers than it is to, say, Wolverine Origins. Glad I saw it. Wouldn't see it again. Didn't care of Killmonger either. Sue me.

Avengers: Age of Ultron - This gets... better on rewatch, but it still sucks. It's a garbage standalone movie, but if you look at it as an in-between film that's setting up things for the Thanos arc, it's actually not so bad. Could've used more scenes like the "Trying to lift Mjolnir," or "chilling at Hawkeye's house" scenes. Just The Avengers hanging out and interacting in low-stakes environments. Instead we get empty, loud, almost Michael Bay-esque action scenes.

Thor: The Dark World - On rewatch, it was surprisingly more entertaining than Thor 1 in a lot of ways. Mostly involving Loki. The human characters, especially Jane and her friend, are horribly boring, and I think we should be thankful that Natalie Portman left the MCU out of frustration for her character being an empty love-interest! She made the right call. Thor isn't really interesting yet, but at least the death of his mother gives him and Loki some legitimate character arcs.

Thor - Eh... it's just kinda bland. Not much to comment on. Loki isn't really fun yet, the human characters are boring, and Thor is probably the least interesting Phase One Avenger aside from Edward Norton's Bruce Banner. It has its moments, but on my most recent MCU rewatch, we were most bored with this one.

Captain Marvel - The most insulting installment of the MCU. Captain Marvel insults people for having those evil Y chromosomes. It's the story of a strong, brave, powerful, beautiful, flawless, overpowered woman who just wants to... umm... be an Air Force Pilot, I guess. She's apparently never met a supportive male in her whole 30+ years of living, because all of her memories are of cartoonish archetypes of men with 1940s values telling her that she can't become a pilot. After all "You know why it's called the cockpit, right?" Ugh...

Not only is the feminist message forced, but it's one of those negative feminist messages that I hate so much. Instead of preaching equality between the two genders, women being just as good as men, it preaches that women are amazing, brave, beautiful, powerful creatures and men are pathetic morons who underestimate women at all times. There's even a scene where her father is yelling at her for crashing a Go-Kart in pure anger and disdain instead of, I dunno... calling a doctor and worrying about his injured child? This movie is... ugh...

Carol herself is either boring and unremarkable or irritatingly condescending depending on the scene's writer. If I recall there were like... 4 or 5 different writers and it really shows. But anyway, she's annoying. She constantly "Womansplains" things to Nick Fury, and her tone is just so smug that it makes me want to slap her. Listen to the way she says "I'm here to stop the shapeshifters that are infiltrating your planet. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you?" It's so demeaning to have Nick Fury, the coolest character whose presence is so demanding and badass that even god-tiers like Thor and a war veteran like Cap shut up and listen when he speaks, be talked to by an unproven character just so Kevin Feige can get some feminist brownie points.

This carries into Endgame where she basically calls Rocket "furrball" and retorts his complaint by harshly explaining why she's not around. In response to this, Rocket, who is characterized in the first film by getting so angry at being called names for his oddities that he almost attempted to murder Drax for it in the bar, simply nods, lowers his head, and says "that's a good point" in a defeated tone. WOW! YOU GO GIRL! CAPTAIN MARVE IS SO TOUGH THAT SHE CAN TALK DOWN TO NICK FURY AND ROCKET AND THEY KNOW BETTER THAN TO COMPLAIN! WOOOOW!

Speaking of feminism, the movie skims over the whole "Air Force discrimination" subplot within under a minute, so we can't really connect to that. As such, one would expect the fact that she's "the most powerful hero in the MCU" to be the big feminist selling point, but she didn't work for that power at all. She got it through sheer coincidence by standing too close to the Tesseract powered engine before it exploded. As such, I suppose the moral is, "Girls! If you wanna be a strong, brave hero, go stand next to an exploding engine!" If so, I caution all viewers to not do that.

Nick Fury is mostly okay in this movie, but he feels underutilized. The retcon of his eye being scratched out by Goose is embarrassing and infuriating. It makes the line from Winter Soldier "Last time I trusted someone, I lost an eye," meaningless and if you were to count this movie as non-canon because of it, I'd be right there with you. He just keeps getting demeaned and treated as a joke, and strangely, the eye retcon isn't even the worst part. I groaned even harder when Carol's friend's daughter says she might build a space ship some day, Fury doesn't know. And Carol replies by saying "You're right, he doesn't know." Pushing the feminist message by knocking Fury down a peg instead of by preaching equality. :\ It wasn't like he said anything misogynistic throughout this film, so I have no idea why he's often the film's punching bag.

Oh, and just a side-note. You wanna know something hilarious? That friend's daughter shows Carol some photos of them together from six years ago. Literally the same actress. Literally the same age in the photo. This child hasn't aged a day in 6 years, so I welcome you to reply with some crack theories so that we can call the writers geniuses instead of incompetence? Is the kid a watcher? A time lord?

Incredible Hulk - Boring, boring, boring. Edward Norton was always a terrible Bruce Banner, the plot is as generic a hulk story as you can imagine, and the character of "Bruce Banner" is almost nonexistent aside from turning into The Hulk when stressed. This Bruce Banner is a handsome, tall, athletic martial artist. If I had to praise it anywhere, the fight between Hulk and Abomination toward the end is actually pretty decent, but aside from that, this film is an embarrassment. It's very telling that the MCU and all its executives swept this one under the rug. It's difficult to find in your Best Buy's "Marvel Studios" section.

There. Proceed to insult my opinions. :D

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brobi-wanwrites · 6 years ago

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Out-Dated Review: Iron Man

A decade ago life was a bit more simple. I was turning 15 and besides finding time to play GTA IV and high school I didn't have a care in the world. My birthday was never a big deal but earlier that year I got my first PS3 and was desperate to start a Blu Ray collection. I told my mother the one thing I wanted for a gift that year was Iron Man. She delivered. That night after reading the case over a dozen times me and my best friend would sit down and watch the movie that jump started the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

At the time I knew as little as you could about Ironman. I spent most of my time reading Spider-Man, X-men and Batman comics so the only things I really knew about Tony Stark was that he was a rich alcoholic and was really prevalent in 2006s Civil War which was in my backlog of comics. Going into this movie I really had nothing to go on besides the great reviews it was getting and that I was always excited to see a comic book character get their chance on the big screen. After credits rolled like many people my expectations were blown away. I watched it again and again enjoying every minute of it. I then dove into my comic backlog and read Civil War and any other Ironman story I could find. It’s safe to say that the first Ironman reinvigorated my and many others love for comics, all while starting a universe that would have as deep of lore as the comics they adapted from.

So ten years later, does Ironman hold up?

(SPOILERS)

Lets start things off with the story.

We’re introduced to Playboy Billionaire Weapons Designer/Manufacturer Tony Stark and he’s just as much as cocky jerk as you would think he’d be. Skipping out on an award presented to him so he could gamble, sleeping with a reporter who’s writing a hit piece on his company and giving little care to the crew of his private plane as he arrives late for its departure. Couple this with how he almost gloats at the amount of death and destruction his weapons bring you would be safe to assume that Tony is unremarkable cliche villain, except he’s not.

I don’t know if it’s his charm alone, his acting chops or how relatable he is to the character but Robert Downy Jr. makes Tony Stark probably one of the most believable and entertaining personality in the MCU. He brings so much life and fun to Tony even before his good guy turn in this movie. Easily stealing every scene he’s in, RDJ was undoubtedly destined to play Tony Stark.

Speaking of good guy turns.

Things go astray for Tony after a weapon presentation in Afghanistan as he’s fatally injured and kidnapped by a terrorist group known as The Ten Rings (more on them later). He awakes in a cave with a car battery attached to his chest, powering an electromagnet that’s keeping the shrapnel away from his heart and other vital organs. Parties amirite? He’s made aware that The Ten Rings are his “loyal customers” and have been using all his weaponry and is then forced to build them his latest weapon. Tony reluctantly agrees and uses the supplies and resources to build something a bit more powerful, a miniaturized Arch Reactor. An invention of his fathers that’s used to power a factory, Tony designed his to be a little more compact. It has enough power to keep the magnet [in his chest] charged for a thousand lifetimes or something big for ten minutes.

Thus Ironman is born.

Even for ten years old at this point, the CGI still holds up. The suits in this movie, whether it’s the Mk I, II or III all look fantastic and just completely seamless. I never once even questioned if they built an actual prop suit or not, it looked so good i assumed they did. Coincidentally the first Ironman is the only movie they actually built the full suit, every subsequent movie they used mo-cap primarily.

After 3 months using only weapon parts and presumably some scrap metal Tony builds the Mk I and kicks some serious ass in his escape. He’s quickly reunited with his friends and coworkers back in the States and damn does he want a burger. Also he announces very publicly he’s done with making and selling weapons. This is Tony’s big turn, he realizes the real cost of him profitting off war with his weapons and decides he is alone responsible for making things right. His business partner and his deceased fathers long time friend Obadiah Stane advises him to lay low for awhile after crashing his companies stock with his big announcement.

The Stark Employee Roster.

RDJ may steal the whole show but Ironman boasts a pretty big and talented cast. Gwenneth Paltrow as the remarkable and composed assistant to Stark Pepper Potts, she’s a joy to have on screen and perfectly bounces dialogue off RDJ. Terrence Howard plays Stark's best friend and military liaison Colonel James “Rhodey” Rhodes, Howard plays this character really cool and I have a hard time seeing Rhodey as much as I see Terrence Howard. His chemistry with RDJ is phenomenal off the bat though, something that takes Cheadle & RDJ about another movie or so to get right. Paul Bettany lends his soothing voice to articulate Siri knock-off known as JARVIS. While his role obviously becomes more expanded upon in later films, Bettany brings a simple yet appealing approached to the A.I. here that pairs well with Tony’s persona. Rounding it out you have the rugged Jeff Bridges playing Tony’s mentor and eventual madman Obadiah Stane. Bridges brings something to this role that I can’t quite put my finger on, he just fully leans into this character and I can feel his presence on screen. He does however have a very sudden change of character entering the third act, he goes from conniving business man to super villain so abruptly I may have whiplash (wink) now.

Bored and nothing to do.

Stark finds himself in isolation and does the only thing his obsessive brain lets him do, work. He begins designing and testing an updated version of the suit he escaped imprisonment with. The Mk II is a thinner, shinier and more airborne suit than its predecessor. It just isn't up to snuff for Tony though, so after a quick flight test with some icing issues, he completely redesigns the suit. After seeing on TV that someone is throwing a party without him, Tony decides laying low just isn’t for him and crashes the party. Thankfully the party is hosted by Stark Industries so Tony can just walk in with no real problem. It’s here that Tony learns that his mentor and friend Obadiah Stane filed an injunction against him and is trying to force him out of the company and may be dealing weapons under the table.

Tony decides take the moral high ground and hops in his new suit the MkIII which must be the coolest getting dressed montage I’ve ever seen, then flies for 6 hours back to Afghanistan. He proceeds to just ruin the Ten Rings day by destroying their weapon caches, which include plenty of Tony's own weapons. After surely making the locals think he’s some sort of alien or metal angel he flies back home, only to be intercepted by two fighter jets. What ensues is an entertaining little game of cat and mouse for a minute until Rhodey, whose job is seemingly just to be convenient to Tony shows up and Tony informs him he is in the suit that the fighters are chasing. Rhodes clears everything up as a trainig exorcise and Tony makes it home.

It’s here our big reveal happens, Obadiah is a bad guy and he hired the Ten Rings to kill Tony but they didn’t like the deal, so they altered it like Vader. Now they want to alter it even further and have Obadiah build them Metal Soldiers like the one Tony escaped with. Obidiah smiles and politely kills this faction of the Ten Rings and figures he might as well build his own suit with his own arch reactor.

Back at the factory while speaking to his team of scientists about their inability to replicate Tony’s miniaturized Arch Reactor, Jeff Bridges delivers the best line in the movie.

“TONY STARK WAS ABLE TO BUILD THIS IN A CAAAVE, WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS”

After this everything starts to happen real fast. Pepper finds a video that directly incriminates Obadiah, he panics and politely tries to kill tony, Rhodes shows up to try and save a dying Tony but he already saved him self. Once he catches his breath Tony hops in his suit to go find Obadiah. Terrence Howard takes a look at the MkII and decides it’s better that Don Cheadle gets to use it. Pepper while accompanied by some agents finds Obadiah's lab only then to be ambushed by Obadiah in a what can only be described as the offspring on the hulk-buster armour and war machine, Iron Monger.

Tony flies in with no time to spare and saves Pepper. A street fight ensues between Iron Man and Iron Monger with them chucking cars at one another. This fight seems oddly small scale now, having been spoiled by the massive fights we’ve seen in recent MCU movies. The smaller scale and one on one fight does feel more personal though and given that this is Iron Mans first outing it makes sense.

The fight goes airborne after Tony realizes he’s no match for the strength of the Iron Monger suit. Much to Tony’s surprise Obadiah has upgraded his suit as well and its now able sustain flight but as a call back to earlier in the film, the Iron Monger suit has an icing problem in higher atmosphere. Tony's suit begins to lose power as they fall back to the roof of the Stark factory. Tony sabotages Obadiah's suit so he cant shoot straight and Obadiah squishes Tony's helmet. Rude. The two men begin to fight with there wits and the bare minimum of their suits. Tony tells pepper to overload the Arch Reactor beneath him and Obadiah and after Tony begs she pushes the bug red button. Boom. Obadiah's suit short circuits and he falls to his death into the Arch Reactor causing it to explode.

I am Iron Man

I gotta give credit to this movies ending. Setting itself up like Tony is going to become your average secret identity super hero but in perfect Tony Stark fashion it subverts that by Tony declaring to the world he is Iron Man. It’s easily one the most memorable moments in all of the MCU. We also get our first name drop of SHIELD here, which at the time blew my mind because up until then super hero movies were so self contained. Credits roll and a Marvel tradition is born as the credits finish and we’re given another scene as Tony walks into his house to see a someone standing in his living room. NICK MF FURY.

“Think you’re the only super hero in the world? Mr.Stark you’ve become part of a bigger universe, you just don’t know it yet.”

One of the single most important lines in all of the MCU. When I saw this my 15 year old brain melted and while at the time I was ignorant to who owned what in regards to film rights my mouth foamed over the idea of all marvel characters existing together in a shared movie universe. It only took ten years and a couple billion dollars but all the marvel are finally gonna share a universe together.

Does it work?

With full retrospective Iron Man is your cut and paste Phase 1 MCU origin movie where the bad guy is basically just a different color pallet than the good guy, which is totally fine. There’s a reason they use that formula, it establishes characters perspective and personality along with their skill set to the audience. It could be because it was the first or just the combination of Favreau and RDJ and all the other cogs in the machine but no movie uses that formula better than Iron Man. I’m in awe of how much fun I had with this movie, I highly recommend going back and watching it again if you haven't recently. It holds up as it’s own movie but with the added benefit that you can clearly see how the whole MCU evolved from the style of Iron Man.

VERDICT

You should already own this, go make some pop corn and watch this./10

#marvel mcu #marvel #iron man #infinty war #mcu #review #movie review #tony stark #robert downy jr #shield #nick fury

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