#then who tf is driving this bus rn

[chiwhorei]

Do you remember that one mf that came on to tumblr dot com to complain about Hazbin Hotel being cringe as if we weren’t all sitting on TUMBLR DOT COM

[whocaresanymoreamiright]

i wanted to make a short post bc my grandma said something to me which was not rly what i expected idk but yeah now it's a long long vent i had been writing for more than an hour enjoy

also i asked my grandma to take me and my friends to the train station by car bc my friends needed a ride there and i did have spare bus tickets to there but i didn't want to make them walk and ride the bus in the rain whoch would've taken like 3 times longer than by car, so i asked my grandma and she took us there but on our way back she was like "yeah.. needs to learn how to drive" i was like "who needs to learn how to drive?" and she was like you. and i'm like no way. bc i don't want to drive it's expensive to learn and to do and in the city where i usually am (so not where she gave us the ride) there's such good puclic transport it's rly quicker than by car, also i don't have the time to learn this rn and it's stressful and i just. don't want it. and it's valid and there's nothing wrong with that.

but then i realised she said it bc i asked for a ride. bc she was cutting her hair at the time i called her (an hour before we wanted to leave) and yeah it's probably rly inconvenient for her. but like she told me the day before that she helps with whatever we need especially if we need a ride to somewhere so like :( wtf. also like what is this leaving-the-subject-of-the-sentence-out-to-make-it-sound-less-guilt-trippy bitch ass method like?? give me a break from it. like say it to my face. that you don't want to or can't take us to the station. we could've gone by bus, we still had time for that too. wtf.

idk why i am so mad. i just feel like i was scolded. and i'm sorry i am sorry i didn't mean to ask for things that are too much to ask for i thought this was okay. also i didn't want to make my friends go by bus, they had to travel a lot the day before and on this day too :( like my party was so lame i know and i just didn't want to make it even worse by making them travel by that shitty bus one more time. idl they will probably never visit me again bc this was boring and lame.

we went to sleep at 1 am :( which is fucking early. like at other parties we don't even sleep at all. so sad. i was so anxious. idk i just felt bad and lame and it was awful maybe bc i haven't rly been taking my meds and i just felt so bad there was also sth i wanted to ask but the conversation just didn't go that direction by itself and i didn't want to bring it up since i wasn't rly talking at all and it would've sounded like i only invited her to ask her this shit. it's not important though. just something stupid i was curious about idk. i'm such an inconvenience honestly, i feel sorry for my friends. i wish it was different.

also i got fucking fat i am not even beautiful anymore i loom awful and ruin the pictures and everything. it's bad. i should diet or idk like it makes everything sm harder i have to plan everything and i can't eat homecooked stuff unless i cook it bc othervise how tf could i count the calories and i can't eat what people give me to eat i can't go out and enjoy the time without being like fuck it it's a binge now and then eating everything and then continuing it for a week and more bc one slip up and it's over i've ruined 3 week's progress and got to a point worse than when i started, i'm the heaviest i've been in years. and i think i'm still depressed, but yes i don't have the pills anymore, right this is what every other one of my posts is about. awful.

this is why alcohol. and this is why food too, yeah. it's sad. idk how to get happier. i feel like my biggest problem is definitely the food though. i haven't been able to eat normally for a week for almost 3 years and now i am confused and clueless. i don't know how to recover.

but i still go running in the mornings, my stomach hurts in the meantime from all the food i had consumed the day before, but i run. and it's good, i've been getting slower unfortunstely but it's still an acceptable pace.

i wish everything was easier. i know that it's the summer vacation rn. i'm sorry for not being able to function.

every time i drink alcohol or coffee or when i got my tatto or when i eat unhealthy snacks or too much, i wonder if he'd be disappointed in me or think that i'm a lazy gluttonous unpure and stupidly rebellious stupid person who does bad things on purpose. it's the saddest thing. i haven't even seen him in such a long time, he probably doesn't even care. i wish he didn't bc i'd hate to disappoint him. please don't care about me please don't form opinions about me. i am so sorry for being like this. idk how to change.

and i feel so awful about it like i should just get up and change myself, my behaviour. but it's such a big project and hard work and everything and i don't even feel like starting it bc i used to have high hopes and trying to recover working harder than ever even while i was denied all bodily autonomy and even while my father was saying the most cruel harmful evil things to me every day, and itried my best, believed in it, and i didn't succeed. progress slowed down then stopped, things got less and less ideal, and then worse, and worse and worse, and now i am here. this is the 2nd time btw. okay, the first time i didn't believe it wholeheartedly but still tried my best. but the second time was different bc then i rly did believe in recovering fully, becoming a happy person. now here i am. fat and miserable, still having an eating disorder. and i have no help now, but i don't know if i want any since last time the "help" was more traumatic than the disorder itself. so i do not want to go through that again. but idk what to do. idk how to pick myself up. i get so anxious and depressed and these mood swings and it's bad and i haven't felt satisfied after a meal in almost 3 years and idk what to do about it. like i could fight it yeah, with chewing gum and sugar free sodas but they probably can only help for so long, and i don't feel strong enough to do this while dealing with everything else. i want meds, i need something.

alcohol though. feel like eating more? get some pálinka. actually i've never tried it before lol, but that's not the point. drink something and feel better. you don't need more food sweetheart. get a drink. cheap antidepressant ig.

and not to romanticise this very serious condition but like.. that's something you can hide more easily. probably comes with more stigma when they eventually do find out but at least you get some help. and sympathy or something. because people know that that is a problem and they feel sorry. but ig i don't actually need people tk feel sorry for me, and i probably don't want help either bc i am afraid, like so fucking scared for life bc of my experiences from last year and the year before (but mostly last year). just no, i don't want anything like that ever again.

but i don't want to gain more weight it's awful how fat i am and i also don't want to think about what and how much i am eating all the time i literally have no idea how much would be ideal i don't want to think about it every meal bc then what is the point like then i can just fucking do a restrictive diet and at least feel pretty too while being miserable not just being miserable for nothing. like losing weight doesn't require a lot more effort than just maintaining, so i might as well lose yk. or i gain. maintaining os effort without reward and i am not strong enough to do that rn.

or maybe i should idk. the reward is ✨️happiness✨️ lmao. idk if i can recover. being an alcoholic doesn't sound fun either. it's sad. at least i'd feel more valid. or i should smoke or something. but that's probably more unhealthy than alcohol? idk but definitely less convenient, sou can't do that everywhere. but you can drink alcohol almost anywhere. from your pretty pink and silver bottle you got for very cheap actually. it looks like you'd put some fucking protein shake or smoothies or some shit like that in it. but no, in mine there's vodka. um. idk lol whatever. currently there's vine in it though.

honestly now i feel like trying this. i am sorry. this sounds better than this binging misery. so. yeah. idk. i'll probably try it.

[imgayalso-ouch]

Ignore this if you want, imma just vent real quick because I am FRUSTRATED. From least to most frustrating:

Because it is winter and I live in Canada it is dry asf which is making my eczema get really bad, mostly on my hands and insides of knees and elbows. It Hurts and keeps bleeding and I cannot stand putting the cream on because it’s sticky and it is hell. I do it right before I fall asleep but even having it on for those few minutes is absolute hell because then I stick to the sheets and get fuzz on me and it’s gross and I hate it with a passion.

I still have to get my MRI results from a month ago but I don’t know how to call the hospital to make the appointment with the doctor because I have to file an extension and I don’t know how and I don’t know who to call and it makes me want to scream. Also I have to get my doctor to refer me to someone so I can get diagnoses for a few more things that I know are happening. I’m kind of frustrated that my younger sister got diagnosed with all her mental illnesses before me. I know it’s shitty of me. I’m glad she has her diagnosis and everything, I’m just frustrated that I don’t yet.

I’m doing a good job at work though apparently. My manager told me she knows how hard I work and she’s very thankful for it and she’s offering to give me more hours. Which is kind of frustrating because like yay more hours, yay maybe I won’t be so broke, but also I work evenings so getting more hours means that I’ll probably start working until 1-3 am, but I have to wake up early to take care of my nephew, and nowhere is open that late except for fast food places, so I’m going to end up eating even more shittily than I am because I don’t want to get home at 3 am and make food. My grandparents bedroom is right next to the kitchen, I don’t want to wake them up.

Still related to work, it was very busy at work last night because it was a Friday and it was cold (I deliver pizzas). The owners of our store were in last night to help because we’re understaffed (in the middle of hiring more people). I’m going to call one of them S. He’s lowkey a dick. Me and the 9 other drivers last night were in the back hall folding pizza boxes (what we’re supposed to be doing when we aren’t on a run or otherwise busy doing something). It was starting to slow down, so one of my coworkers bought some food and was eating it in the back hall, and the rest of everyone was kind of distracted and talking (except for me, I was folding boxes because nobody was including me in conversation). It shouldn’t have been a big deal, we’re allowed to eat and talk during work as long as what needs to be done is getting done, which it was, I was doing it. And even if I wasn’t doing it, it should have been fine, my coworker who was eating dinner had opened and been there for 6 hours already. S decided that he would come yell at everyone for not doing enough. He started yelling at my coworker eating dinner and basically saying “if I have to be working, so do you” (S had like just started). After yelling at everyone else for not doing anything, he decided to try to get me on his side because I was working, by saying “[he] shouldn’t have to be doing all the work, that isn’t fair, is it?” I just kind of shrugged, I didn’t know what tf to say to that. I was honestly perfectly content folding pizza boxes on my own. There’s not that much space (let alone space for 10 people to be doing it).

And last but not least, the most stressful thing rn is that CAS (children’s aid) kind of placed my one and a half year old nephew with my family because his mom is negligent. My family being: my 70 year old grandparents who are both disabled/chronically ill, my dad who works full time, my mentally ill 16 year old sister, and me, a disabled, mentally and chronically ill 18 year old who works almost full time. During the day my sister is at school and my dad is at work, so it’s just my grandparents and I watching my nephew (mostly my grandma and I if she’s feeling well that day, if not, then just me). I love my nephew to death, he’s the cutest kid ever, but he has SO MUCH energy. I wake up at 7 to drive my dad to work, and I sometimes drive my sister to school if she misses her bus. I come home, fall asleep for another hour until my nephew wakes up. I spend the better part of the day taking care of him and keeping the house tidy. I usually start work at 5, and frequently don’t get home until midnight. I usually fall asleep before 2, and it starts again. My nephew’s supposed to be back with his grandma and mom on the weekends (they live together). Today, his grandma decided she wants to go out with her friends, so we’re babysitting the kid again. She sees him two days a week. But no, she can’t bring him with her to her friend’s house for like two hours, she has to bring him here so I can spend one of my two free days watching him and running errands. I’m frustrated and tired and I need a fucking hug lol.

Sorry for the rant

[loseralertitsme]

dream.01 part 1

So it starts off at my old house by the base. I have a eating disorder, I just eat anything and everything whenever I feel anything basically. My mom thinks its 100% out of control, so she takes me to the desert near the mountains and we see a bus and im like “ wtf are we doing out here ? “ and she tell me “ you have a problem so youre going to get help “ my first reaction was to up and leave. As soon as I turn around she shoves a needle in my leg and I knock tf out. No one knows where I am or whats happening they just know I dipped. For whatever reason my mom left me my phone so I message my boyfriend and im trying to explain im technically in a prison for people in need of help ? But its high tech like literal prison built almost. My time there is supposed to be a year and throughout that year im trying to find ways to escape cause fuck all that. Along with that theres this CRAZY ass bitch who wants to be me and looks pretty identical to me too ? Like great im stuck in this weird ass place with a crazy chick who wants my life, great. Anywho, 6-7 months later maybe it’s around midnight and im climbing this fence trying to leave its maybe 9 feet tall and 5 feet behind it is another fence same height. About half a mile away is a park by my old highschool, thats my go to place after I escape. As im mid climbing this crazy bitch , we’ll call her destiny.2 . She shoots me right under my left rib cage and i fall cause ouch that shit hurt ( my phone fell out if my pocket but who tf cares rn ). Instead of confronting me she just turns and leaves hoping the guards will find me. Little did she know i hopped my ass back on the gate and got to the top now as im about to make this 5 foot jump to the other one she fucking shots a bit lower than the other one on my right side though like wtf this bitch has okay aim. I make the jump but obviously I fall down the gate and i just run as fast as a bleeding out bitch can to the park and who do i see there ? The homie kev was just chillin in his car and looks at me and says “ dude wtf “ I jumped in the passenger seat and told him to driveeeee. No i don’t go to the hospital I go back to my apartment where my boyfriend and baby are. As we walk in Kev goes before me and sees Cris ( my boyfriend ) playing games. As cris turns to say whats up to kev, he sees me limping and bleeding behind him. Cris runs to me and pulls me into the shower and tries to wash the blood off me ( there are bullets still in my body ) and as hes doing so hes in deep ass tears ( never fucking cries so im shocked ) . When we were done and sitting on the bed, kev says “ we should probably go to the hospital “ so i start getting ready and Cris stays home with asa. Kev and I are mid driving and he decides I need band aids ? We pull over to a dollar tree and as we are walking we see our friend Allie. We are like “ fuckkkkk “ cause we were trying to keep my escape on the low since hella guards are on the look and shit. She ends up seeing us and after the shower idk why but i put back on the bloody ass shirt i was wearing. She completely ignored it asking us to hang and the convo was already hella long so we kind of yoinked her and instead of going to the hospital we go back to the house. As we are all sitting on the bed Cris gets a video call from destiny.2 pretending to be me. I tell Kev and Allie to wait in the other room and Cris tells me to stay. So as they are on the call this bitch literally just wants to watch him beat his meat. 😂 So he has his dick covered by a sheet and all she can see is the movement and him moaning and shes loving it? Yes this all sounds wierd but if he acted sketchy about it she would have known I was there. So this goes on for a minute and right after she hangs up. So after that Allie stays home with our baby and Cris, Kev, and I finally go to the damn hospital. As we are on our way Destiny.2 calls kev and is like “ hey i miss you why havent you texted me “ so he pulls up his messages and puts her on mute ( he shows me his phone cause he forgot to send it earlier and oh boy 😂 the message reads

fuck this is too long i got the rest on another one rn

[cannedapricot]

Road Trip with! NCT Dream

the album,,,,,,, the mv,,,,,, i’m soft don’t touch me,,,,,,,,,,,, here’s a road trip au based on their mv to let my uwus out. also this gif makes me hella emo

hello

so i know school has started in most countries

but for this au, pretend that you’re still on summer vacation!!

aka what i wish i was on rn ugh

anyways!!

high schoolers! dream!!!

except-

mark’s already graduated high school

and will head off to his uni after the summer ends

then donghyuck, jeno, jaemin and renjun’s gonna graduate before next year summer

which really means

that it’s gonna be the last summer of your crew as high schoolers

this thought didn’t really go through your head until a week before school starts

when the 00 line fucking shows up at your door with their bags already packed

and bright smiles

you’re just like-

????when did we agree on a sleepover????

“hEY YOU UP FOR A ROAD TRIP TO COMMEMORATE OUR LAST SUMMER AS HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS?”

“uh-”

“come on, dear y/n, it’s not like you were planning on doing anything else”

you eyes narrow 

becaUSE DID THEY JUST ASSUME YOU HAD NOTHING TO DO

i mean,,,, they’re right tho,,,,, all you’ve done all summer is laze at home because it’s way too hot outside,,,,,,,,but,,,,,,,,,,,,

“can,,,,, you even drive tho”

“hahHAHAHAHAHAH DONGHYUCK? DRIVE?” 

“i even don’t trust him with my fish what makes you think i trust him with the wheel”

“okAY JUST BECAUSE I FAILED MY DRIVING TEST TWICE DOESN’T MEAN YOU GUYS CAN BULLY ME”

fuck no one’s sane here

but what’d you really expect from two jocks and two art geeks

the same jocks and geeks that pushed you back into your own home and watched as you packed

wipes away tear

“why am i always forced to do dumb shit with you guys”

“whAT DO YOU MEAN????”

and so you were pushed out the door after having a word with your parents

who only agreed to let you go cause they deemed renjun trust worthy

because he’s the only one who at least acts normal around your parents

“whoSE CAR ARE WE EVEN U S I N G- oh”

right on the curb parked mark’s old and stuttering blue car.

on which he sat in the driver’s seat, trying to get the old thing to play music

“are you sure we’re not gonna die”

“nope, but it’s the only car we have available”

jeno whispered in response, throwing your bag in the trunk

“ah, y/n, i see you’ve been successfully dragged into hyuck’s dumb idea”

donghyuck climbs into the passenger seat next to mark, 

flipping his friend off in the proccess

“you are all here because we are all friends and we love each other”

you, being squashed in the back seat:

“no - not really”

“wtf jaemin there’s another row of seats in the back stOP TRYING TO PUSH ME OUT”

“BUT I WANNA SIT WITH Y/N????”

“fucking donghyuck”

“WHY ME???? WHAT HAVE I DONE????”

wow great start to your trip 10/10

picking up chenle and jisung literally took five seconds

they lived next to each to each other

and it only took one excited nod from chenle for jisung to tag along

and that’s the story of how you ending up being in a shotty blue car with seven teenage boys

miles from home on an empty ass road

screaming the lyrics to micheal jackson songs into the heat (thanks to dj haechan)

at least mark got the speakers to work again

“wherE ARE WE EVEN GOING???”

“IDK LOL”

“WAIT WHATTHEFUCJ-”

at one point, jisung and chenle at the back decided to sit up onto the car, with their legs on their seats

“I’M PRETTY SURE THAT’S ILLEGAL AND DANGEROUS”

“yOlO!!1!1!!!1”

“how the fuck do i disown them”

“push them off”

everything was going swimmingly

until the car breaks down in the middle of the road

“i knew this was gonna happen sighs”

mark then jumps out to check the hood

then immediately notices something wrong rip

“hyuck, pass me the box in the glove box.”

“you’re prepared???? does this happen often or????”

so mark tries to fix the car in the blistering heat with renjun nagging beside him, holding an umbrella to hide the two of them from the sun

whilst the rest of you start playing uno on the back of the car

multiple times, not once, buT MULTIPLE TIMES

CHENLE HAS LOOKED AT YOUR CARDS

HE’S DOESN’T EVEN TRY DEFEND HIMSELF WHEN YOU POINT IT OUT

WHAT A LITTLE SNAKE

“FOR FUCKS SAKE ZHONG CHENLE IF U DON’T STOP I SWEAR-”

jisung won every round 

which made the rest of you bond trying to break his win streak

“jeno do you have a plus four to screw him up with”

“i only have a green plus two if that helps”

and that kinda goes on until mark lee emerges from behind the raised hood, telling y’all to give the car a push

“yeah just a second, jisung’s finally losing-”

“hA YOU THOUGHT”

THROWS DOWN FIVE NINES

INFURIATING

everyone grumbles as they hop off and start pushing

“lets just put our rage into pushing this stupid car”

which ends up moving easier than y’all thought it would

so the seven of you stumble a little when the car started moving by itself

mark nearly drove away himself lmao

made the group of you chase after the car for a moment lmAO

you wished he did drive off though because the second the car starting moving with everyone back on,

he yells,

“lET’S GET IT”

“siri where’s the nearest bus stop to get home”

“HSEGFSUEF NO I’M SORRY :C”

then as the day slowly got darker,

your screams didn’t die down lol

the latest feud was over chocolate vs vanilla

and you honestly think about how you got stuck in a group of dumbasses

“remember when hyuck hated jaemin and jeno back in freshman year lol”

“nO SHUT UP RENJUN”

“LMAO DIDN’T HYUCK DISLIKE THEM BECAUSE THEY CHUCKED A BASKETBALL AT HIS HEAD”

“what you still remember that? i’m sorry hyuck :’cccccc”

“NO JENO I’VE FORGIVEN YOU AGES AGO- FUCKING RENJUN-”

the group of dumbasses did make you laugh though

so maybe it wasn’t so bad

night then came and the conversation finally started to tone down

mark pulls to the side of the road 

“let’s call it a night, yeah?”

the rest of you mumble in agreement

“our last summer as high schoolers huh”

you hum, running your hands through jaemin’s freshly dyed candyfloss hair

“but will anything change even if you guys graduate?”

chenle asks from the back, head on jisung’s shoulder

“not much, i don’t think. we just won’t see each other as much.”

it was a clear night, and the stars were brighter than ever

everyone was staring up at the night sky, enjoying the cool breeze

“we always have summer right?”

a round of agreement sounded before jeno cuts through-

“does this mean we’re going on another road trip next year?”

“way to ruin the mood jeno”

“oh please no, i don’t think i can handle another one with you dumb fucks”

lies

you loved every moment with them

“this is a cute moment and all, but can jaemin get off of us now?”

renjun asked, referring to the long boy sprawled on top of jeno, renjun and you

“i was planning on sleeping in this position tho-”

he didn’t get to finish his sentence before the three of you pushed him off

mark chuckled before leaving his seat to pull the hood over the open seats

“good night”

you were shook awake by mark the next day, greeted with a sky that wasn’t even awake

“what’s going on?”

“fancy watching the sunrise?”

turns out, mark woke up earlier than the rest of you and drove to an empty beach to watch the sunrise together :’)))))))

you stumbled out of the car, legs soft from sitting for too long, finding the rest of the boys sitting on the hood of the car and on the concrete in front

donghyuck pats the space next to him and you hop on top of the creaky car

“is this safe”

“probably not”

“ o h “

it’s all quiet before the sun starts coming up

then gasps were heard and wishes were made

and it was all heartwarming :”)))))

before all of you made a dash to the cold ass water

trying to chuck mark in

“whY ME????? I DROVE Y’ALL HERE”

“YOU’RE LEAVING THAT’S WHY”

“SBRGOSBEGOSBAE??????”

S P L O S H

chenle was screaming the entire time

then one idiot cough hyuck cough accidentally chucks sand into mark’s blue car

which then leads to mark pulling the squad into a self wash station

“come one guys let’s wash this car together!!1!1! wE’rE aLl In ThIs ToGeThEr”

“wow i suddenly dont know you”

then some idiot coUGH HYUCK COUGH starts chucking suds at everyone

AND JAEMIN’S LOWKEY TRIGGERED BECAUSE NOT HIS NEW HAIR

SO HE FIRES BACK

AND RENJUN WHO WANTED TO HOSE THE SUDS OUT OF HIS HAIR ENDED UP FIRING WATER AT CHENLE’S FACE

EVERYONE STARTED LAUGHING LIKE NO TOMORROW AND YOU GOT A GOOD VIDEO OF IT LMAO

AND EVERYTHING JUST ENDED UP WITH EVERYONE GETTING A FREE SHOWER AT THE STATION

and renjun getting pinned to the car by jeno but u h 👀👀👀👀👀👀 

y’all end up drying yourselves by sitting under the hand dryers in the bathroom

“at least we don’t have to worry about showering”

“hyuck you started this shut up”

hopping back into the small car, the group decides to start heading back

mainly because your snack supplies were running low

but also because you don’t think the car’s gonna survive any longer

but mostly because snacks were running out

“chenle ate all the fucking pocky”

“nO JISUNG DID”

“WTF-”

“i love best friends throwing each other under the bus”

taking a shorter route home, you stop at a basketball court to move a around for a while

“why is jaemin and jeno on one team, they’re the star basketballers of our school tf i call bs”

“you literally picked your own team-”

nomin vs the rest of u fuckers

no surprise, nomin won

now you guys owe them mcnuggets

“hA SU C C”

“let’s leave them behind quiCK TO THE CAR”

mark: trips over own laces running

in no time, you were in front of your own house again

unlike before though, you lowkey didn’t want to leave your friends

“i still can’t believe that we ran out of snacks in a day and a half-”

“blame chenle”

“hEY-”

renjun pats your shoulder as jeno and jaemin go get your bag for you

“we’ll be living and sleeping at mark’s place until he leaves. you’re welcome to join”

mark from the driver’s seat: what.

and as they drive away with mark questioning when this was decided,

you head back inside to restock you bag, leaving for mark’s house just a few hours later

when high school started up again, you weren’t surprised to see renjun having chensung in headlock in front of your locker

whilst hyuck just whispers-

“right in front of my goddamn salad” at the sight

creaking open your locker, the first thing you do is stick up a group photo taken on your trip

nomin lean on your shoulders, craning their neck to look at the photo

“we look dumb”

the picture was taken by mark setting a timer on his phone then running to join the picture 

everyone was lined up, leaning against the old blue car against the sunrise

but mark bumped into haechan who bumped into jeno, who bumped into jaemin etc etc

and the picture ended up coming out with everyone slanting as y’all fell in a domino effect

but the smiles on your faces were precious :’))))))))

“i think it’s cute” 

you say, closing your locker, ready to face another year with these fuckers.

hi i’m apri and i present to you yet another unedited piece of shit :’)

listening to the dreamies’ album while writing this made me really emo about mark’s graduation so it got really deep in the middle im s o r r y

[mauridianhallow]

A L L O F T H E Q U E S T I O N S

Good shit good shit this took me ages holy hell enjoy you meme loving fucks Q's for you to A Do you have a favourite sweater? I actually do, it's that kinda folded over stretchy grey one I always wear, y'know? I wore it to The 1975 and, from what I hear, it was awesome. (Although I can't remember bc I was Gin Drunk) What’s your middle name? Lawrence...no judgement...Do you still talk to the first person you kissed? I don't, I wonder how's she's doing. Heard she was studying History from her friend I met in a bar one time. Glad to hear, she was nice. Do you get on with your grandparents? I did! Sadly it's been a few years since they passed but I very much did. What was your favourite cartoon as a kid? Hmm, it's a tough one, between the 90's X-Men TV show they played on repeat on Fox Kids or Ben 10 when it wasn't absolute shit like the remake. Yeah I'm bitter. What’s your favourite cartoon now? Archer lol Do you read the news paper? Yeah pretty much every day...I swear I'm not an old man. Who was the last text you sent to? My friend Laura, asking if they'll still be at the park when I finish work. What does the last text you sent say? "Y'all still gonna be there when I get away?" If you could have any hair colour what would it be? Idk I like the one I have. Do you like nature documentaries? Not really my cup of tea to be perfectly honest. What is your aesthetic? Climbing a mountain at a 90° angle in Skyrim on a horse. When did you last pet a dog? ''Twas yesterday. Whose friend’s parents do you like the most? The twins'! They employ me! I literally get paid to hang out with friends some days that's the good shit! Have you ever been on a road trip? I've been on a couple, longest was a drive to Southern Spain from Scotland! Was awesome! Tell me about someone you know called Emma? Went to school with her, cool gal, she saw HP in London and I'm jealous, shoutout to @weewildelassAre you reading a book in english class, what is it? Oh god I'm old. I haven't had or attended an English class in over 2 years. Do you have a favourite Aunt? Well considering she also employs me...hell yeah, shoutout to my Aunt K you legend! Baths or showers? Baths for comfort and treating yo self, or sharing...😏...Showers for quickness and weird snapchats at 3am...😂 Skiing or sun bathing? Sun bathing my dude. Do you kill spiders? Sometimes, sometimes not. Have you ever made an ice pop? I have not. Are you wearing shoes right now? I'm not wearing anything rn. Tell me about you favourite primary school/elementary school teacher? Let me tell you about Mrs. Mary "The Bonecrusher" Highland, and how she was such an iconic, legendary, influential and inspiring woman that she was the person you sent into the bad fucked up schools in movies and have them all pass with straight A's, she ran a tough ship and was slow to praise but when she did, she went all out, and made you feel like what you had achieved was truly a feat. Oh and she encouraged children to learn and think for themselves, genuinely encouraged you when you said you were interested in something even when it went above and beyond the curriculum. She was charitable, friendly, and spoke to you like you were an equal, and a worthy one at that. Mrs. Highland was literally so influential in so many people in my class being successful, free minded, hard working adults that she deserves a goddamn award. And let me tell you another thing, at the end of my First Year in College, I went back to my old Primary School for a teaching assistant internship because I knew the school was becoming a bit run-down and out of control and I wanted to help the way that Mrs. Highland had, and who had they just asked to come out of retirement, come back for TWO WEEKS, sort shit out and then walk away into the sunset like some goddamn Old Lady Teaching Avenger who appears when needs were greatest? MARY FUCKING HIGHLAND, I GOT TO HELP ONE OF MY CHILDHOOD HEROES BE AN ABSOLUTE TEACHING LEGEND AND REALLY INFLUENCE SOME GOOD IN A KIDS LIFE, THAT IS THE SHIT! Seriously though, she truly is one of the good ones, they don't make em like Her anymore. Who was the last person you hugged? I think that would be my mother actually hahah. Do you wear glasses? Occasionally. Do you have a cat? I sadly do not. Do you have a favourite pair of underwear? Not a favourite pair exactly more like a favourite kind?? Next All-Black, that's the good shit, makes my ass look great among other things. What was your last tweet? "How the fuck do you work twitter" about 5 years ago and I haven't used it since. Do you still use Facebook? I do, rarely. Do you like birds? Aye pal birds, blokes, the lot. Who was the last person you called cute? That genuinely would be my niece, or you lol Who was the last person that called you cute? This is a strange answer but a regular in my work. Long story. How did you meet your best friend? I literally turned a corner and ran into a group of emo's in like Fourth Year at High School and I haven't looked back since. Escalators or elevators? Nah m8, trick question, I'd rather take the stairs. Does wonders for the thighs. Are you named after anyone, who? Ahaha yeah my dad, both my granddads, and Saint. Christoper (Catholic mum yo) What was your first url? I have no idea. Autumn or Winter? Winter I can't lie. Do you win at scrabble? I do not lol Put your ipod on shuffle , who is the first song that comes up by? "American Idiot", Green Day. Classic. Have you ever drunk from a mason jar? I have not. Can you draw? Barely even write m8 let alone draw. What was your first profile picture? I think it was Kenny from South Park. Favourite t-shirt? God I have no idea. Best tumblr friend? Shoutout to @bepizzazzed and @double-dorks-beanie and @hesitant-butthole When did you last run? Tonight when as a joke my friends took my jacket and tried to get it on top of a climbing frame? lol I had it back in seconds and decided to get some payback ahah Do you like to paint your nails? Not particularly fussed, not a look I could pull off. Did you ever do something as a kid that got you into loads of trouble? I did more things to get me into trouble as a kid that anyone should ever do. And I still did it. Who is your favourite dog that isn’t yours? Trick question, all of them. Have you ever been drunk? Literally so many times. So many. Have you ever done something you regret while drunk? Some-thing? Some-one? Getting into a slutty dance off with a professional dancer? Stealing a mannequin? The exact words "I can easily make this jump..."? The exact words "Watch this lads"? The exact words "Shots won't do me any harm"? The exact words "Another Venom? Aye no bother!" The exact words "You can crash at mine if you like...?" You get the picture...I do messed up shit I'm drunk, and yet, I continue to do so. Do you want to kiss anyone right now? Ronald McDonald ngl for the sweet sweet invention of double cheeseburgers. Do/did you like you math teacher? I had a crush on both of my maths teachers, Mr. Kelly and Mrs. Hendry, both of which contributed to me turning up to class, but also contributed to me failing said classes bc I was too busy looking at them and being a hormone ridden, horny 16 year old boy, than I was doing maths. Do you often ride the bus? I do, everyday I'm in College. Do you have a fireplace in your house? We do actually it's getting renovated right now. Are you violent when you’re angry? God no! Do you cry when you’re angry? No, I rarely get angry and when I do it can only be described as dry anger. Favourite Harry Potter book? It has to be OotP, fight me. Can you remember your last dream? I can, and let me just say, Chris Pratt, thank you. Do you go to bed early or late? "Do I go to bed?" would be a better question. Do you speak a second language? I speak various levels of different languages. Some if you dropped me in their respective countries I could find my way about, albeit difficultly, and others I can ask for the bar and the bill and that's about it. Who was your first ever best friend? A boy called Dean. Have you ever had an operation? I've had a couple yeah. Tell me about your favourite cousin? His name is Reece and he's a meme loving shit and I love him the whacky bastard. Do you have a piece of clothing that doesn’t even fit you anymore but you can’t bare to throw away? During what can only be described as the Greatest Summer of My Teenage Years; the Legendary Summer of 2014, I wore on my feet almost EVERY DAY a pair of Classic Chuck's, they cost my poor wee mum like £60 the Christmas before but they were too big and when it finally hit summer they fit perfectly. I wore them every time. If you've ever read the book Me Before You or watched the film you'll know what I mean when I say they were my bumblebee tights. Have you ever been in a musical? I played the Cowardly Lion in my school play as a kid. Do you have a porch? I do not. How many times have you watched your favourite movie? At least 100 no joke it has to be. Empire Strikes Back. What do you order at McDonalds? Plain double cheese , small fries, Oasis Summer Fruits and maybe a coffee. Do you get on with old people? Worryingly well. Science Fiction or Romance? Sci-Fi m8. Do you take naps? Anytime I can. How many classes do you/did you take in High School? In my final year I took 3 classes. At its height I think I was doing 9 classes. When did it last snow where you live? A few months back. Does it ever snow where you live? It's Scotland...hahah it very much does. How many months until your birthday? 12 m8. How much charge does your computer have right now? 42%What is your favourite Disney Channel Original Movie? I don't actually think I had one. Sorry. the City or the Sea Side? Jokes on you fool, you can have both. What is your least favourite colour? Beige. Who tf likes being beige. Do you have homework to do? Nah. Are you still friends with your first best friend? I am not. Do you have/are you the gay cousin? I have an asexual cousin, bug more often than not I'm the gay cousin. Do you own dungarees? They can look cute on peeps. Do you like to play sport? I do, not to the extent I used to but yeah. What was your favourite ever Christmas present? My baby nephew. How old are you? Ugh I'm 20. Do you ever use Internet Explorer? Not for s long time. Have you ever had blonde hair? I haven't no. I wanted to but sadly I was a kid. When did you last see the person you have a crush on? Well considering I fall deeply in love with strangers who are nice to me on the train, that question is crazy. Who did you last talk to on the phone? Laura. Pants or Dresses? This question is a lot funnier in the UK and even funnier in Scotland where a man can wear one, but to do so, he's not supposed to wear the other 😉 Do you read fan fiction? Not anymore y'know. What is you’re favourite blog? @mauridianhallow is a pretty cool blog you should check that shit out Do you write poetry? I HAVE written poetry before. Drama or Comedy? How dare you insult The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt by suggesting you can't be both. Have you ever had a hickey? Perhaps...perhaps I have. Perhaps I cannot remember how I got some of them. Perhaps I should stop buying the ENTIRE bar a round of shots knowing all too well that almost every one of these people will offer to buy me drinks all night and then I won't pay shit for another drink until the night is over. Perhaps I should...I won't but I fucking should. And perhaps this has on certain occasions resulted in hickeys I don't know.