#then she finds out what scarlett did and she’s like ‘YOU FUCKED UP MY FATE????????? MY PERFECTLY GOOD&PRETTY FATE??? HE LOVED ME :((‘

[chryzuree]

could’ve sworn i’d posted this thought before, but apparently i didn’t so!! what iffff gavriel managed to convince scarlett to change someone’s emotions at their core via threat to her bby sister??? and what if said person was jacks instead of julian??? and what if it was for her to change jacks’s love for chrysi into hatred??????? jst so gavriel could finally wrest control of chrysi’s fate from her??? so he can finally claim jacks as his fate, part of his pantheon, even though he wasn’t the one to create jacks????? what then????

[fluffywolverine]

so season 6 of lucifer came out.

there were some things that i liked, but generally i hated it. i believe that was SUCH. BAD. WRITING and it left me frustrated. so i decided to write down all things that pissed me off and sometimes i try to fix this by giving other ideas that – in my opinion – would have made the story better. Check my points out and feel free to add your points of view. without further ado: let’s talk.

- imma start with the big one – fucking time travel. ok I generally hate this trope in the media, because it’s complicated and often leads to some logical mistakes – and they happened here. so rory time travels because of her anger which was caused… by her anger?? i think this was unnecessary. it also brings trouble with this whole free will vs. fate discourse. lucifer says, that he chooses free will… but at the same time he goes the path of his fate. he disappears from rory’s life, because he HAS TO in order of the events of the season to happen. just because he chose to do it, doesn’t mean it’s free will.

- lucifer becomes the very thing he desperately didn’t want to become. “bUt It WaS fOr ThE gReAtEr GoOd” screw this bullshit, if writers wanted to make it better, they could have easily do so. they could have altered the rules of time travel so that his choice of staying could have resulted in rory disappearing. yes, that would have been heart-breaking, but it would have been a great lesson for lucifer, that he can’t make the same mistakes his father did.

- chloe and Lucifer get a child without even talking about it. “bUt MaYbE tHeY tAlKeD aBoUt It We JuSt DiDn’T sEe It” you may say. but the point of writing anything  - whether it’s a book or a script – is to show any thing that matters. and talking about having kids is one of the most things any couple should do. also not every couple needs to have kids and forcing deckerstar to have it feels so far-fetched. this thread was very unnecessary.

- rory herself is a big problem. to begin with – she wanted to KILL her FATHER. i get her frustration, but commiting a murder?? just because he wasn’t there for her?? I would have thought that chloe taught her better, taught her that, like, killing people is bad. turns out she did not. secondly… she just isn’t necessary here. i elaborate later so in conclusion – her thread could be altered with michael’s and it would have made much more sense. i also don’t like the actress (why was she blinking so much??) so i certainly didn’t help.

- of course ella has to end up with a boyfriend. because earlier she always ended up with “bad boys” and now, without any help, she is just able to have a healthy relationship! yay! for me this creates a toxic view, that in order to be happy one HAS TO be in a relationship, because being alone is aLwAyS bAd. well, it’s not.

- i also have troubles with lucifer starting up a foundation for her. firstly, he didn’t ask her. secondly it – AGAIN – shows, that anything good ella got, was because of another man. firstly because of her relationship with carol, secondly because of lucifer’s idea. it could have been so easily altered! there could have been a scene of a conversation e.g. with amenadiel where she expressed a will to do better and be better for someone (given that she sees a lot of dark in herself). amenadiel could have then told her, that she is an inspiration and that it is her biggest strength. that could have been where ella came up with an idea to start a foundation blah blah – it’s just a rough idea but I believe that written well, it could have been so much better;

- and the last thing about ella – of course she had to find out about celestial stuff because sHe WaS tHe OnLy OnE rEmAiNiNg. umm what about trixie? i'll come back to her later. ella was portrayed as the only one believing in god and having her seeing that he really exists ruins the concept of faith. it’s not about knowing something exists, it’s about believing in it.

- WHERE THE FUCK IS MICHAEL. i must admit that i loved this character AND I CAN’T STAND HOW AWFULLY HE WAS TREATED HERE. so at the end of season 5 lucifer says “everyone deserves a second chance, even you michael". and what does he do then? COMMANDS HIS TWIN TO CLEAR THE FLOOR IN HELL. yes, i agree that michael should have been punished for his rebellion plan, but… he already has his wing cut off. now he’s stuck in hell, with no way out and is he supposed to learn his lesson? this is cruel. instead of this the entire season could have been centred on him – his journey to self-acceptance, learning how manipulating someone is toxic and starting to realise how to be a better person. at the end he could have become god (because amenadiel is such an obvious choice), which would create a beautiful connection – michael in heaven and his twin in hell.

- lucifer doesn’t feel like being god and that’s cool. damn. people died for him to win this place and he’s like “actually you know guys i’m not the right person bye”. while i believe that anyone should step out if they have a reason, but at the same time lucifer should have faced any consequences of his decisions. falling frog and kool aid in the river are not enough.

- adam’s plot feels just quickly sketched, not actually written. i really appreciate this take on toxic masculinity but it all felt too fast-paced. it’s good that they show this idea of “strong and not-showing-any-feelings man” kind of attitude, but it is impossible for ANYONE (especially The ManTM) to change their mind in a matter of a few days. it takes weeks, months, years even, especially given that adam is like a gazillion years old, he should have especially taken a long time to process this.

- carol is just too pure to exist. he’s also one of the most boring, plain and one-dimensional character i’ve ever seen. i feel like they gave him a problem with alcohol because the writers were like “hmmmmm he has to have some weakness. LET’S MAKE HIM AN ALCOHOLIC”. we don’t see any signs of his everyday struggle, why did he fell into this problem, how did struggle. it just feels like a dull plot device to show that he has flaws. oh and also he’s so pure that he doesn’t mind ella BREAKING INTO HIS HOUSE. acceptance should have boundaries and violating someone’s personal space isn’t right.

- why did they forget about trixie again? yes, i know that scarlett estevez had another project but this does not justify the bad writing. the girl lost her father and we only see her crying once because of that. no signs of this affecting her everyday life, not showing any consequences of her relationships with other people, not  glimpse of any change in her behaviour. oh and also she loses lucifer too because time travel! great idea, writers! losing another close to her person would have been soooooo good for her psychic for sure.

- i also hate the idea that suddenly rory becomes the only child they care for. where is trixie when they spend their day on the beach? where is she when her mother dies? did writers forget about her as well as they did about michael?

- amenadiel being a police officer is… problematic. i was looking forward to this thread, i was kinda scared too and it turned out… meh. i’m white and not American, so this of course does not involve me at all, but i felt like this was not enough. harris basically said that there is nothing they can do to make it better for black folks. even though chloe and amenadiel want to make everything more just, we don’t actually see any change. the only thing is that harris becomes a detective (right? i’m not sure if i understood it correctly, so correct me if i’m wrong, please) which is a total contradiction of what she said before. suddenly she does not have to protect people anymore?

- in season 5 they stated that heaven and hell need to be fixed, as the system is unfair and unjust. at the end we don’t see any change, the only thing that is different is lucifer helping damned souls. it doesn’t help at all! these people still go to hell, they still suffer and there’s nothing that changed here! plus there is also this thing, that a sociopath who murdered people in cold blood goes to heaven (because he does not feel any guilt) and a person abused by her parents/partner/whoever goes to hell (because have been manipulated to feel guilt).

- dan making amends with trixie while… there wasn’t really anything to make amends about. like, most of the parents make mistakes while upbringing their children, but does this make them unworthy of heaven? i would have preferred dan to slowly regain his self-consciousness, how he positively affected the lives of people around him and by doing so – through conversations or maybe reliving some of the memories, he could have proved to himself that he is worthy of love and redemption.

phew, what a ride. i really liked dan being reunited with charlotte (it went just as i imagined) and mazeve dynamics. i even felt like they are finally a real life relationship – with people hurting each other by not understanding each other, but then talking and seeing other’s perspective. generally though, i’m very disappointed.

sorry for any mistakes, lacking commas etc. writing a text this long in not my native language was not easy.

[descentivity]

Depression, Trauma, (and Most Importantly,) My Thoughts on Hello Charlotte EP1 & 2

Eating has been difficult for me for as long as I remember. It started off as an aversion to food, in favour of spending my time more efficiently on what my dumb little mind viewed as more important: Homework, video games.

Over time, it turned into anorexia. I had already gotten used to eating just under 500 calories a day, and my depression took my poor habits and twisted them into a cowardly and slow attempt at suicide.

On my road to recovery, I’ve found that years of poor eating choices have lead to my body struggling to process food. I have to eat at a painstakingly slow pace lest my stomach turns against me, and the smell of food is sometimes enough to diminish my appetite altogether. My bowel movements are, for lack of a better word, a shitshow.

This brings me to today, the 10th of August, 2021. 6 or so years of barely eating enough to survive later, I’m setting the world record for the slowest consumption of a fillet o’ fish in the history of mankind. 

In my absolute boredom and unfathomable stomach pain, ManlyBadassHero’s playthrough of some random horror game (I can’t remember the name) appears in my YouTube recommended, and I’m reminded of a horror game I bought on sale on Steam, the last of a trilogy. In all honesty, I only bought the game because it was dirt cheap and one of my sisters’ names is Charlotte. I was too horrified at the time to process the story nor play the previous two games, so I did a quick achievement run and left it at that. I was certainly very confused as I had no idea who any of the characters or what any of the concepts were, but the gore had me too mortified to go and find out myself. 

A year later, I’m looking the trilogy up on ManlyBadassHero’s YouTube channel, and decide to start from the beginning of his Hello Charlotte journey, in 2016.

Hello Charlotte EP1

I’m going to be completely honest with you, the first game really didn’t resonate with me too well. It was a cute, quirky, RPG Maker horror game, with two loveable main characters and an interesting world. However, with context from the third game, the events felt too self-isolated and inconsequential. Felix and Charlotte are in a little self-contained TV world created by a fictional race called Pythia - creatures with 3 or 4 eyes that can create miniature dimensions, once brought into a hivemind by an “Oracle,” which seems to be some sort of god. They all seem to be falling apart and have taken a horrific turn as most of the Pythia have been “executed,” and those who haven’t have either gone mad or into hiding in their own bubbles of (albeit temporary) safety.

The ending of the game is somewhat misleading, too. Once Charlotte and Felix escape the TV world by having Charlotte merge with the Oracle itself, the game almost plays off the previous events like they were all a story made up by a young and imaginative Charlotte. Did they happen at all? Is she a reliable narrator or point of view to begin with? (Spoiler alert, she is not.) The explanation for it all seems to be that Charlotte herself is a schizophrenic, though the legitimacy of this is brought into question in the third game, which I will talk about later. Altogether, the game didn’t bring out many strong emotions in me, and I was starting to zone out as I moved on to the second game’s playthrough.

Hello Charlotte EP2

What struck me as odd in the second game is that while the first game seemed to bring Charlotte out of her own strange, black-and-white world and back into reality, we’ve found out that she’s right back where we started last game. A black-and-white world, inhabited by her imaginary friends. Aliens, gods, and the like. However, Charlotte’s seemingly made-up world feels more alive this time. I’m not sure if this is the consequence of the game developer improving their skills or an intentional detail, but even more characters are introduced, and previously shallow tenants of Charlotte’s home are given more depth. The hazmat-suit wearing aliens have faces, personalities and whole backstories attached to them, now. Charlotte has a best friend at school named Anri, who has a obsessive crush on her. She’s friends with a bullying victim named C with horrible germaphobia, who has almost identical struggles to her (more on those struggles later.)

What also surprised me is the continuity between the first and second game. For some reason, I thought that this Charlotte would be starting from scratch, completely oblivious to the fate of the first game’s iteration. However, this concept only seems to be used in the third game, so I guess I was simply mislead. This game, in fact, takes place 3 years after the first, and the Oracle still lives on within Charlotte’s conscious. However, it’s a dying god, on its last leg. It had already been dying during the time of the last few Pythia, but it had used the last of its strength to free Felix and Charlotte from their world. As the Oracle’s health declines, so does Charlotte’s mortal body.

Unlike the first game, most of the themes in this game hit way too close to home. The feeling of second-hand helplessness when someone you barely knew ends their own life. Anri’s obsessive and outright manipulative lesbian crush on Charlotte, bordering on bullying. The schooltime harrassment and trauma Charlotte underwent. The fear and dangers of social interaction. Feeling unlawfully punished by your school teachers for seemingly nothing at all. Depression, self harm, and the primal urge to escape from it. Getting roped into others’ mental health, until both of your issues converge into a disgusting amalgamation of the need but severe lack of therapy and a break from it all. Delusions of what could’ve been and the possible, yet near impossible future ahead. Looking back on everything you’ve ever done and regretting every second of it.

While I ticked off the trauma presented to me on a silver platter in the form of a fucking RPG Maker game like a twisted bucket list, I found myself relating more and more to not only Charlotte, but the students around her. Scarlett, whose life was so perfect that nobody had even thought about her possible mental issues until it was far too late. Anri, who would lay down her life for a girl who simply doesn’t feel the same way. C, who desperately wanted to escape from reality by any means possible.

An interesting fact about Hello Charlotte is that there are numerous omnipotent beings amongst its cast. They aren’t shy about providing very in-depth character analysis to Charlotte, and in turn, to the puppeteer (I suppose now is a good time to inform those who are unfamiliar with the series that the puppeteer refers to a species, character, and the player, all at once. Charlotte has a puppeteer controlling her by the name of Seth. You are/are controlling Seth as the player. Capiche? Capiche.)

What this meant for me watching Manly’s playthrough was the feeling of two gods (in this game, at least) peering right into my soul, analysing characters that reflected my exact experiences and even my personality during my school days. I learned and realised things about myself that I simply hadn’t known before. Just like Charlotte, I’m simply looking for direction in life, and I’m too afraid to act without instructions. I found myself bullied, manipulated and abandoned by someone who simply wanted my affections, and only learned to miss them when they were gone. Like Anri, my desperation for love and approval from an individual in turn lead to anger and resentment for them. Like both Charlotte and C, I eventually turned to hurting myself to make all the pain go away, refusing help from others and developing a shell of false optimism and naivety to forget about the damage I had dealt to my body, personality and relationships.

As much as I hate to admit it on my little obscure Tumblr blog with 0 followers and 0 traction, I still struggle with these things. I have no direction in life, and wander aimlessly, hoping for one of my offshot attempts at content creation to take off. I find myself missing the girl who emotionally abused me to hell and back every day. I resent another girl for never feeling the same way I felt about her. I still don’t take care of myself, and spend every day in a state of denial about my physical decline and sickliness. I’m so incompetent emotionally that I spend days ignoring my own boyfriend, starving him of the proper relationship that he deserves all because of how broken, fragmented and distant my own mind is.

Hello Charlotte EP2 has four endings. All four of them, in my eyes, are bad.

In the first, C and Charlotte overdose together, leaving their mortal realm to become gods. They choose to ignore and forget the pains of their mortal lives, and live the rest of their godly lives in ignorant bliss. Do I want to forget about my depression and trauma? Learn nothing, and forget about everything that made me who I am today? Or worse even, do I dare take the plunge into “godhood,” and leave this mortal plane to end my suffering altogether?

In the second, Charlotte discovers that C isn’t who she thinks he is, and she finds him without a soul. Alive, but empty. Charlotte could not save him. Consumed by grief, she ascends and becomes a god, consuming the entire world around her. After all is said and done, she realizes her mistake. All of her friends are gone, C is still empty and unresponsive, and now she is alone. Sometimes, I feel as though I’ve already gone through this ending, many times over. Countless times I’ve let my depression become all-consuming and take over my life. I’ve pushed so many people away and hurt so many more, and for what? I have nothing to gain from every fit of depression, and the consequences make it seem nothing more but a selfish attempt to make myself feel better.

In the third, Charlotte is the only one who dies. In her last moments, the Oracle comforts her, like a mother cradling her child. They embrace, and say goodbye to each other, as Charlotte’s own life was the only thing keeping the dying god alive. At this point, I’ve started to draw parallels between the Oracle and depression. Depression isn’t always a horrible thing that beats you down and keeps you from being truly happy. Sometimes, wallowing in my own sadness and depression would be the only thing that keeps you sane, stable, and calm. The feeling of hopelessness really is bittersweet, and in desperate times, goes hand-in-hand with acceptance of one’s circumstance. Oftentimes, I find that this is the most realistic way I’ll go out. One day, I may just accept depression, and succomb to it. There may not be a struggle at all. Rather, a quiet, submissive hum, which will fade away into silence.

In the fourth and final ending, Charlotte and C die alongside each other. After her death, Charlotte confronts the Oracle, and wishes to save everyone, and for everyone to be unhappy. Of course, this is where the classic saying: “Be careful what you wish for” comes in. Because of her wish, everyone’s soul, what makes them individual and unique, is erased. After all, no one can suffer if they cannot think at all. In some ways, emptiness is pure bliss. This once again goes back to the bittersweetness of depression. The sheer emptiness it may bring on, at times, is bliss. Feeling nothing isn’t always a bad thing. It’s a way to cope with the horrors of the world. To remember nothing at all is such a tempting yet unattainable solution that I can’t say I haven’t longed for in the near or distant past. Charlotte, of course, is distraught that her friends are all gone, their identities and souls lost forever. Following this, she has one request to make of another god, the observer. She wishes to be killed, as all of her actions have lead to nothing but pain for others and herself. The observer, however, refuses this offer. Instead, he comforts her and takes her hand. They go on a journey together. He suggests that one day, she’ll learn to control her power, and she can recreate the world and her friends. As they leave, Charlotte reflects on her hopes and dreams for the journey. She hopes to learn to be kind, and not hurt others. She wants to change her ways, and become an honest, good person. Charlotte, slowly but surely, is on the road to recovery.

Putting the unsettling sequel to this game aside, maybe I could learn a little bit from Charlotte.

[angelkurenai]

Imagine being part of the Black Widow movie with a character who is Bucky’s wife in the comics. Only you and Sebastian have a crush on each other so your costars try to set you up.

“Natasha, my sister. What brings you home?” Yelena only tilted her head when Nat rounded the corner with her gun raised. She frowned when she saw the blonde was only smiling at her, no gun of her own raised. And that was even more suspicious, or even scary and dangerous, than her having one pointed at her.

“We've unfi-” she started, the words having been on her mind from the very beginning and ready to be spoken after thinking about them too much. She stopped herself though, frowning deeply “Wait a second. Aren't you... going to fight back?” she put a smirk on her lips “Where's my welcome back party?”

“Oh there will be one. There will be.” the smile on Yelena's lips was even more worrying as the seconds ticked by, especially when Natasha watched her grab a chair and slowly move it to the side before taking a seat on it. And when she crossed her arms over her chest, leaning back casually, it all clicked in her mind.

Natasha's eyes widened and a breath left her lips as she muttered “Well, fuck.”

She barely had time to let it all register before she swirled around and was met with very certainly a kick in the face. It wasn't strong only because the attacker was holding back but it managed to do the job of disorienting her, making her grasp on her gun loosen up. An arm quickly appeared, ready to take it from her but she quickly grasped it, pulling back only for the attacker to swing with to knocked on her hand while an elbow met her face. Taking advantage of the hand with a gun close to her, and after just having lost hers, she took hold of the arm and twisting forced it to drop it. Both parties jumped after the fallen guns, with a roll and twist, soon on their feet to face each other and point the swapped guns at each other.

Only two seconds of silence before “S'up sis.” you said with a wide smile that made Natasha laugh and shake her head a bit.

Glancing at Yelena from the corner of her eyes to notice the blonde had taken and poped a beer open, watching the show with interest. She looked back at you, gun still pointed and smiled even more “Figures you'd be here. Since she didn't even attempt to make a move.”

“I'd rather watch the show, thank you very much.” Yelena shrugged “It's been a long time. Oh and while we're on that-” she raised a finger “Twenty bucks on Red. Sorry, Natasha.”

“Only twenty? Come on, you drink like there's no tomorrow. How is Nat gonna buy for drinks later? That won't be enough. Unless Natasha has more on her?” you complained, looking at Yelena who pouted.

“But I only have twenty with me?” she raised the money in her hand, looking a bit more though her pockets but unable to find anything else.

“Fine.” you huffed “But you two keep it down on those damn drinks. I, as the winner, won't.”

“You two are literally the worst.” Natasha tried to say a bit more seriously but she only scoffed a laugh “Already so sure you'll win this, (Y/c/n)?”

“When have I not? Wait-” your shoulders relaxed a bit “Yelena, have I ever?”

“Absolutely not. I've kept count.” the blonde shook her head “And I doubt this will be an exception.”

“Thanks for the vote of faith you guys.” Natasha muttered with a roll of her eyes.

“Hey, I'm technically your opponent right here. Don't expect my vote of faith. Especially after so long. I'm kinda looking forward to see what new tricks those Avengers taught you.” you smirked, the both of you circling around each other. All Yelena did was lean forward in her seat to watch you both.

“It's been a long while. I'm pretty sure you've got a couple new ones yourself. Speaking of which-” her smiled turned into more of a teasing one and you prepared yourself for the worst “What has the great Red Widow been up to lately? Still saving, what was it, ah Red Sparrows from their fate?”

“Hardly. The new ones seem even less willing to be saved. I'm keeping my tabs on them but, you see, the world is a big place for only a handful of heroes. Never enough of them. Even more, ones willing to use all means necessary. You know how that is. So-” you shrugged “I've expanded my horizons.”

“Ah one would wonder why that is.” her smirk only grew, especially as she shared a look with Yelena, and you cursed at both yourself for your not careful words and your sisters “I suppose, there aren't any more Winter Soldiers to save from HYDRA anymore, are there? Oh it feels just like it was yesterday. There is that one in particular-”

“Alright-” you huffed, giving her and Yelena who was trying to stifle her laugh a glare “Is that how you're planning on winning this? That's a low move, Romanoff. And you- you stop laughing. That's not fair play.”

“Oh you've hit a spot there, Natasha. I might even have to reconsider my bet.” Yelena smirked and you shot her another glare.

“I mean, I kinda remember you always fell for the ones with the blue eyes, didn't you (Y/c/n)?” she insisted of course and you hated yourself for how easily you let it affect you, not that you really had any control over it “I've got a location, in case you're still interested.”

“Oh she is. I assure you of that. I've got enough proof.” Yelena smirked, taking a sip of her beer casually.

Natasha chuckled. You glared as hard as you could at her though you knew, you could practically feel it, that the heat had started traveling up your face “I hate you both so much right now. One more word and I give up on this.”

“Then, maybe, I shouldn't mention how he's asked me several times about you ever since he found out I knew you? Oh the questions he had and the times he brought you up.” the smirk clearly didn't leave her lips and you didn't even try to keep yourself from rolling your eyes.

“I'm never telling either of you a single thing again.” you sighed.

“Wow! What a scene!” the video cuts to Scarlett who is holding the phone – his phone Sebastian notes and he hardly can keep himself from wincing, preparing himself to do that later because nothing good could come out of this. And given how the woman uploaded the video in his own account and it has been up there for a good few hours now – because, let's hide his phone away that would be great too is what she must have thought of – there is no taking it back because far too many people have seen it. Now it's his turn. And, once more, given how he's aware of how well his friends know about his crush on you, based on all the endles teasing, he is prepared for the video to be the most embarrassing one of those moments.

“Red Widow, finally in the MCU, who's excited about that? I know I am! It's going to be amazing on the big screen, especially with such a wonderful actress as (Y/n)! I can't believe how I had managed to keep it a secret for so long. I know everyone is excited, I've been getting texts and calls from friends all these days, though the one that really has been more thrilled than anyone has kept quiet about it. As some would say. What I would say is-” he smirk was full of mischief “Has kept shy about it. Because trust me, if there is one reason I'm making this video for, it's Sebastian Stan. So this goes to Marvel... and possibly (Y/n) who is not sadly away these days filming but I have no doubt will see this.”

Oh no. Oh no. Goodness, he hoped not. He didn't dare take a look at the comments but he feared, after the countless notifications, that with all the attention this was getting you'd see it one way or another.

“And since I know you follow him and will be attentively watching everything he posts, I expect comments down below or like, definitely, a dm. You two either start texting each other or else I'm gonna smack you in the head because there is only so much mutual pining I can take.” she let out a small breath before grinning even more widely.

Mutual... what? Sebastian blinked twice or three or four times. He didn't know. He'd have to watch the video again and listen to that part just to make sure it was not his own wishful thinking. And definitely ask Scarlett about it. However, he had to watch the entire thing first to see for himself just how bad it was.

“Oh and don't think you're off the hook, Sebastian. This video is also about you, if not mainly about you. I'm doing you a favor, buddy, you'll thank me for this later. After, like, you dare come out of your house when you're done dying of embarrassment.”

So, actually never, if it was all going as bad as he imagined.

“See, as I've made very obvious, he's a great fan of hers. We all are, let's not kid ourselves. However, when he doesn't let his vast admiration for that great talent and possibly small- who am I kidding, big crush on her, take his mind away he has these brilliant ideas that I can't help but agree to. And even if he might be a bit too shy to admit it out loud, I'll go ahead and say this: Hey Marvel, give Bucky Barnes his wife in the MCU...” well, maybe not as bad as he feared. The crushing part had been mentioned more than plenty of times by the rest of his friends.

“Because Sebastian would totally love to share a kiss or two with (Y/n). And we want to see the most badass couple of the Marvel comics on the big screen too.”

Well, no, it was even worse apparently.

“As would her, but that's not the point here. I've been trying to figure out a way to get two idiots together and with all this distance and work, this is the best I could think of. Well-” Scarlett shrugged and it was then he noticed the laughing behind the camera “Chris Evans' really, but if it works, hey fine by me! He said something about being subtle but I ain't got enough patience for that anymore. So, there's that. Hopefully, Marvel and Kevin will listen, even more hopefully (Y/n) you'll see this and then even more hopefully as if by a miracle I won't have to listen to you two talk about each other, non-stop, ever again!”

[micciemoore]

ahstories

wasn't happy w ahstories. what the fuck was that. it made me homophobic. anyway so I decided to write Scarlett & ruby meeting. might make a part two, might lick a clit. well have to see how much I like the third ep 

---

I grab the gin from under the sink--because Troy thinks he’s able to keep his alcoholism a secret by hiding bottles in the most generic places--and run upstairs to my room, on fire. Electric. I drink as I run and it burns my already sore throat, and within the frenzy inside my head I catch myself thinking about how good a cigarette would feel right now. Burned. Searing Maya’s skin, adding a beauty mark like Marilyn Monroe right above her pouty lips--she wanted to be a model, right?

  The knife in my room isn’t clean. It’s tainted with the meat I found in the garden--little animals I carved to see the bones. To make things with. They squirm and I feel ethereal as my knife plunges into their tiny chest. I’m the one who makes the fucking choices and I’m the one who decides who feels pain and I’m the one who picks who lives and who dies and I’ll chose for Maya and she’ll squirm like the chipmunks and bunnies and all the cute little creatures that died because of me. Because I chose it. Because I am so fucking powerful that I am able to weild the decision most people are too intimidated to stare in the face. It all comes down to me and my mood. Maya’s life now falls into my scales--her heart and a feather--and I’m waiting for the balance to settle into her fate, and I choose her destiny and for a moment, for just a moment the universe is in the palm of my hands.

   A little chrome switchblade I ordered from Amazon when I was fourteen. Well used and well loved, I call her Peggy Sue. Holding the knife, pushing the blade out with my thumb, I take another swig before setting the bottle at my feet. She looks rusty but I know it’s just the dry blood. I think of being the master of the universe as I bring the blade down on my arm.

   “Heh, wait.”

  Interruptions. Interruptions. Someone is interrupting the fucking greatest moment of my life and has the audacity to chuckle while she did. Before it could register that I should be the only female in the house, I clutched the knife harder--my knuckles white--and started trembling.

  “What?” I don’t look away from my arm, I see it as Maya’s. “Get the fuck out.”

  “Like I would ever! After that little monologue of yours, I’m way too invested to suddenly leave. Or, to see you leave, I guess fits a little better.”

  Monologue?

  My head shoots up. In the threshold of my bedroom is a girl I’ve never met before, with raccoon eyes and knotted brown hair. She’s dressed in a biker jacket, zipped closed, and leather pants. My eye twitches at the leather, like she was wearing them for the sole purpose of mocking me, like she knew.

  I point the knife over her shoulder. “Get the fuck out.”

  “No.”

  I stalk towards her. “Get the fuck out.”

 She’s grinning. As I get closer, I notice a horrible stench emitting from her jacket. It takes me by surprise and I stagger back, holding my nose and gagging. I never smelled anything like it, it was like sulfur came from her clothes in waves, burning anything it touched. I cough, only to find a similar taste lingering against my tongue, and this time I think I actually will puke.

  She steps towards me. “No.”

 “Who the hell are you?!” The smell was a cruel torture in of itself, but her smile, and the way she looked at Peggy Sue, told me she still had other plans in mind.

  “What were you gonna do with that?” She asks.

  “With what?” I rub my watery eyes. “Christ they’re burning! Did you fucking roll in shit?”

  “The knife. What were you going to do with the knife?”

  “The knife.” What? I look at it in sudden puzzlement. What was I going to do with it? Startled out of my pleasure, none of what I was thinking made any sense. I look at my arm, it wasn’t even the same shade as Maya’s-

   The girl shoves my chest, grabs the knife and laughs. She points the blade at my neck. “That was too easy!” She teases me with puckered lips. “My sweet little dreamer, didn’t Momma ever tell you to get your heads outta the clouds?” I back against the wall. “All the action happens down below.”  

  She pounces and I scream for my dads.

[msjr0119]

Why me?

Chapter 22- Am I dreaming?

Riley is forced out of Cordonia unknowingly to her friends, and moves back to New York.

She is later faced with her past from Cordonia and is hiding a few new secrets. With the help from her New York friends and friends from Cordonia will she escape her current situation and find her happy ever after?

Tags- @annekebbphotography @burnsoslow @butindeed @ladyangel70 @bbrandy2002 @choiceslover-24-7 @carabeth @drakewalker04 @drakesensworld @duchessemersynwalker @captain-kingliamsqueen @kingliam2019 @pedudley @bascmve01 @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld @insideamirage

This chapter is Drakes POV..

******

She didn’t come back. I’ve truly lost her. The guys explained that they did their best to get her back to me. When Liam and Bastien was due to return, my heart was skipping beats, hoping she was with them. That week they was in New York, I felt jealous. I wanted to be with her. The week felt to me like years. I knew by the reaction of their faces that she hadn’t returned.

I had lost my dad due to this vicious court. I’ve now lost the only woman I loved. Liam tried his best to comfort me. The only person, I wanted to see was her- Riley Brooks.

“Drake, I’m so sorry. She seemed to give us the impression that she was coming back- she even told me she was ready to return. Then she just left. No one has heard from her.”

“It’s fine Li, thank you anyway.”

It really wasn’t fine. I was a wreck, what was the point in me even being here anymore? I’ve never really fit in. I was only here for Liam. When the social season began, again I only stuck around for my best friend. That was until, I started for fall for one of his suitors. I couldn’t help it- she is beautiful and funny. I’ve never felt this way before, I’ve had girlfriends in the past but none of them were like Riley. I never connected with girls from my past. Especially Kiara- that was the biggest mistake of my life! Riley understood me, she asked about me, she asked about my childhood. She was selfless. Liam now has Olivia- I have no idea how that relationship will work. I know that Olivia already wears the trousers in that relationship. Poor Liam.

I’ve had a rough time since Liam had returned. It was self inflicted though. I didn’t want to socialise with these people- I just locked myself in my room. Occasionally, I went for a drive in my truck. Hoping I may see her beautiful smile- fate bringing her back. But no. I just had to kept that hope in the back of my mind.

Liam, Olivia and Maxwell were packing their things to go and attend Leo and Beth’s wedding. They kept attempting to persuade me to go, I said no. They used her name in conversations regarding the wedding, trying to tempt me into going. She probably won’t be there anyway. I’d just be more depressed, hoping to see her and her not being there.

Once they had left, I had Bertrand and sweet Hana trying to check up on me. I felt guilty. I was always drunk. I always responded in an angry tone. I know I’m a grump at times, but I’m not the hulk. I should apologise- but I can’t. I’m too stubborn.

Later that night, I decided to visit the bastard that ruined my family and my life. Bastien was here, why he wasn’t with Liam in New York I have no idea- he probably thought the Scarlett Duchess would protect him. She always threatened people with her daggers, they’ll be fine I thought.

“Bast? Is he still in there?”

“Yes Drake. I don’t think you should see him in that state though.”

“I don’t give a fuck! Are you going to let me in? I need to say goodbye to him.”

Bastien nodded, he knew I’d get my own way in the end. He practically brought myself and Savannah up. I am grateful for that. I always will be.

“Drake? What do you want?”

“Constantine, I just want to say, thank you for fucking my life up. Thank you for killing me inside here...”

As I said this, I pointed to my heart. I might as well be dead. In all fairness, I’m surprised he didn’t hire assassins to kill myself and Riley. He’s that twisted. I hope he suffers just as much as myself and Riley have.

“What on earth are you on about Drake?”

“You know! Don’t act fucking stupid! Because of you my dad died saving your stupid ass! Because of you, I lost the woman I adore, the woman I loved. Just because I’m a commoner doesn’t mean that I don’t have a heart! I did have a heart and it was filled with love until you tore it away along with those snakes!”

I don’t know what happened to me after that, I committed treason. I punched him in the face, finally letting my anger out on the man who had fucked over so many of my friends and his own sons. I feel like I could have killed him, but my father role model stood in and stopped me. He explained that the King Father wasn’t worth my hassle- I could slightly disagree. He was so cold hearted, he wouldn’t feel the pain that myself or anyone else inflicted on him.

I apologised to Bastien, he told me it was fine and that he didn’t see anything. I knew the king Father would try and twist things as usual.

I felt so alone. I had no choice. This was the end of Drake Walker, I walked into my room grabbing the whiskey bottles and painkillers. I needed to write Riley one last note.

Brooks, I’m so sorry, if you ever receive this letter it’s because I know something bad happened to me. I feel like a coward doing this, but without you I have no life. I feel lifeless every time your smile isn’t here with me. I wanted us to work, I would have moved to the Bermuda Triangle or anywhere to just be with you. I hope you live a happy life- the life you deserve. I will always love you Riley. Thank you for giving me that love these last few months.

I drank, and continued drink more. I could slowly feel myself losing consciousness. Barely awake that’s when I heard Bastien and Hana storm through my door. The room was now a blur, just these panicked voices ringed throughout my mind. I’m sorry Riley.

*****

Brooks?

Liam?

I can hear you both!

Why won’t my eyes open?

Why does she need to rest?

Your baby? What baby? O my god! Is she... no she can’t be?

She wants to stay. She’s begging Liam to not make her leave.

What is going on? Am I dreaming?

“Liam! His hand! It... it moved.... Drake? It’s Riley... please wake up!”

[merchnkerch]

thoughts on finale

*spoilers for the series, obviously*

*scroll by very fast if you have not finished*

-

So I fell in love with Caraval, and Legendary was even more spectacular. However, Finale just didn’t do that for me. Though I feel like the ending fit, I also think it could have been something more. But I can’t place exactly what that would be.

/

After reading Legendary, I did think the Legend reveal was underwhelming. I never connected to Dante’s character, so I wasn’t a fan of him being this all-powerful being. For me, his presence in Finale took away the intriguing, dangerous, mysterious, powerful being that he was mythed to be. And maybe this thought is just because I haven’t read Caraval and Legendary in a while. I do think Finale provided explanation and brought things full circle. I guess I just wish it had a bit more twists and turns.

/

When I say twists and turns, I mean that I feel like there could have been more plot. There was definitely plot in Finale, but the book felt short to me. There was heavy focus on romance (I expected that), which I would have been okay with, BUT I felt like it took away from a stronger plot. It seemed like there was less puzzle-solving from the sisters, something that gave the other two books a unique feel. Finale was clearly different from the other two books because it wasn’t a game. I was stunned once I finished Caraval. I liked how it kind of fucked with my mind. I mean, it makes sense that Finale wasn’t a game if the point was to wrap up the series. It did bring a new view of the characters. It just didn’t do it for me.

+ ngl, the pinning between Legend and Tella was frustrating. I felt like it should have leaned more towards subplot, rather than the majority plot. It didn’t seem like the story really got going until the middle. I might have thought this more so because I was never a Dante-Legend fan. I also really liked Jacks character so I do kind of wish he had gotten more in the end (my reasons for this post are not solely love triangle based, however). she knew what she did writing a character that says “my love”

/

During Legendary and Caraval, it seemed like there was a world beyond what we saw. That would have been cool to see. I know we got introduced to the Fates, but I think they could have been delved into more (like I know they were a big part of the story, but... idk). Or what Julian and Legend were like before the magic happened. Who knows, maybe Stephanie will expand on it someday.

/

That’s what I got from that. I really do appreciate Stephanie for writing this series. Scarlett was great, but Tella was a super refreshing personality. It was cool to see Tella seem super powerful in Legendary and get to Finale to find out that Scarlett is a) a Fate’s daughter & b) the QUEEN. I’ve lost sleep because of these books! I’m not completely satisfied, but I still had a magical time getting to know the sisters. Also, Julian was a wonderful thing.

/

Feel free to share your thoughts :) !

I know the community’s kind of small, but for those of you that have finished... hmu with an ask or message

[villa-kulla]

so I saw Avengers Endgame last night, and honestly.....

I actually frickin’ LOVED it haha, I haven’t genuinely enjoyed one of the Avengers ensemble movies that much since the first one. Granted I’m still very sleep-deprived and on a slightly giddy high from how much it exceeded my expectations haha, and once I’ve thought more about it I’m sure I’ll find things to nitpick. But for the time being, I’m still pretty much swooning.

FULL INCOHERENT THOUGHTS/REACTIONS TO SPECIFIC THINGS BELOW THE CUT, AND OFC, ***SPOILERS*****

ONCE AGAIN: ******SPOILERS********

these are just my rambling Emotions about different moments, ostensibly in the order they occurred in the movie, but actually in the order I remember them:

The opening scene: that moment when Clint turned away from his daughter, and then turned back to see just a few remaining ashes floating slowly where she’d been was beautifully shot. Also beautiful: the soft gasp that went around the theatre right when it happened haha

Killing Thanos within the first 10 minutes and breaking the expected formula and thereby thrusting the movie out into unknown waters? lmao WELL PLAYED, ENDGAME <3

Steve picking up Sam’s mantle and running a support group for survivors? flawless move. My heart couldn’t take it

Okay first thing I genuinely didn’t like: “fat Thor” as a punchline. It was so cringey. My friends and I were discussing how that actually COULD have been so great had they explored Thor’s breakdown and PTSD in a meaningful way, and I mean who wouldn’t adore thicc Thor? But instead we got comedic zooms on his beer belly, and yeah. Kudos to Hemsworth for being a gem and making it work but yeah. Nothing wrong with Thor going to seed physically as well as mentally, just wish it hadn’t been played for laughs is all

Tony basically ripping his heart out and putting it in Steve’s hand? I knew my Vintage™ Stony feels were going to resurface and oh boy did they ever haha

Honestly their whole dynamic in the movies works very well if you imagine that they had angsty hate sex that wasn’t actually hate sex at all, and there was the possibility of real feelings there, but for whatever reason they just couldn’t. quite. make. it. work.

That moment with Antman and Hulk’s fans was so genuinely awkward and I could not stop laughing. Paul Rudd is a gift

It only took them 7 years to realize that all fans ever wanted was the Avengers lounging around in hoodies and eating takeout, but it felt all the more earned for it haha

this is silly but it was nice to have a return to Nat’s red hair...sort of lol

TIME HEIST! TIME HEIST! TIME HEIST! TIME HEIST!!

^^^ That was around when I really started settling in like ‘oh this is gonna be good’

the only spoiler I was exposed to was the ‘Steve’s ass finally gets the recognition it deserves’ post, and did it ever

got as close as we’ll get to canonically bi steve rogers and imma take it haha. Checking out your own ass? Legends only (in fact in our post-movie debrief over drinks, our first toast was ‘here’s to bisexual disaster steve rogers’ he time heisted my heart all over again)

and honestly props to them for going the cute nostalgic route by revisiting all the old movies like that, and not trying to be overly ‘dark and gritty’ for the whole thing. It was lovely how they did it, and very appropriate

The ‘Come and get your love’ credits from GotG is like the only concrete thing I even remember from that movie lol, and I was so giddy when it resurfaced

I’ll be honest, I’m so over aliens and space lol, any time one of these movies goes to space I’m basically yawning instantly, I’M JUST NOT INTO IT FOR THESE MOVIES SORRY. So I’m glad the space stuff was kept to a minimum in this haha. The way they do alien civilizations just never really packs a punch for me, with the single exception of...

......NEBULA MY LOVE <3 She was always the most intriguing and raw of any of the characters in those movies for me. Karen Gillan gives her an amazing presence, so I was glad to see her get a good showcase in this one

Oh hi Robert Redford, I definitely wasn’t reading Butch and Sundance fan fiction on the bus to work 12 hours before this movie asdjhgf haha that was a fun surprise

“Hail Hydra” ajshgd FUCKING EPIC OH MY GOD. I couldn’t breathe. That was amazing.

On a much less lighthearted note.......Natasha. Oh god. I really didn’t think they were going to go there with any of the original six but they did. Natasha was my original fave at the tender of 18, I was completely in awe of how Scarlett portrayed her, immediately cut my hair and dyed it red in tribute haha, and claimed her as my OG fave. I adored her, and still adore her. And honestly, I would have been so much more upset about her fate if...it hadn’t been so completely right for her. As much as I hate to say it, what she did was very character-appropriate for her, and really brought her full circle. And sneaky/unexpected to the end omg. That’s my girl.  I’m a diehard Black Widow fan, and I think it’s safe to say she definitely wiped out the red in her ledger, if there ever was any left <3

.....that being said, really, no lingering zoom on a photo of her somewhere at the avengers compound? Nothing? The reaction immediately afterwards was well done, but it was kind of awks that it never came back with even a mention lol 

Loved the way they did the ‘Guys...I think it worked’ emphasized only by the sound of birdsong. This movie killed it with the quieter moments

And now for something absolutely not quiet:

STEVE!!!

CAUGHT!!!!

THOR’S!!!!

HAMMER!!!!

I HAVE NEVER HEARD A THEATRE COLLECTIVELY LOSE THEIR SHIT LIKE THAT IN MY LIFE

I may have screamed. So. fucking. aces.

Between ‘Hail Hydra’, ‘That is America’s ass’, and lifting the hammer, Steve really owned this movie didn’t he lol

that’s my boy <3

they may have turned steve’s last movie into an avengers movie, but man alive this avengers movie was pretty much steve’s show and he killed every second of it

I’m giddy just thinking about it 

And speaking of giddy, everyone’s return.....normally the big final climactic battle scene tends to pale in comparison to nimbler action sequences that happened earlier, but I said giddy and I meant it. They really pulled out all the crown-pleasing stops in it, and it was impossible to nitpick, I had the biggest fucking smile on my face the whole time

AND OH MAN THAT ONE LITTLE MOMENT WITH DR. STRANGE. HOLDING UP ONE FINGER. WHAT A MOMENT. INCREDIBLE. JAW-DROPPING. VISIONARY. TRANSCENDAENT. UPLIFTING. MY HEART SOARED.

Until......THAT MOMENT

“I am Iron Man”

TONY

Oh god

Everyone speculated it would happen, but I didn’t actually think it would. IDK MAYBE I’M JUST NAIVE LOL.

I was actually kind of numb there for a while and I stayed numb until....

“Your dad liked cheeseburgers too”

Yeah there was no recovering after that lol, I was basically a wreck until the end from that moment on

Man...Tony Stark actually died....

As powerful as it was, I don’t really think they had to go there in order to bring the pathos? Idk I have mixed feelings about that choice lol, his big moment was epic but you know what else is epic? Going back to your log cabin to live with your family in peace lol. Idk I’m still not sure how I feel about their choice with that, but maybe it just hasn’t fully hit me yet

Sam as the new Captain America?? A-fucking-men

And this brings us to the ending

the controversial ending which is already causing its own civil war based on what I’ve seen so far haha. And for what my two cents are worth....

I loved it. That was a bold move and I really have to give them props for choosing something risky and unexpected as a conclusion. 

That last shot was absolutely beautiful. The moment ‘It’s Been A Long, Long Time’ kicked in I think my breath caught. And that slow zoom in on the window to see Steve and Peggy dancing 11 years of the Marvel Cinematic Universe to a close, and sealing it with a kiss? Gorgeous.

I’m honestly choked up again just thinking about it lol.

And although it’s a small thing, no end credits sequence?? That’s what we call true closure lol, and I think that was what really hammered in the fact that it’s really all over, folks <3

Yes there were some nit-pickable things, some things that could have been better, or came too little too late, and I can’t even BEGIN to wrap my head around the time-travel implications in the conclusion (and I’m not sure we’re supposed to haha). But they took approximately 9000 storylines and characters and managed to represent them in what was actually a genuinely emotional, thoughtful, and entertaining movie that managed to smash the expected formula and the gently pick it back up again to piece together a satisfying, crowd-pleasing, and soaring resolution. Yeah a good deal of the emotional-payoff was already built in what with audiences bringing their own 10-year journeys with these movies to the theatre, and part of my excitement about this movie is definitely tied into the overall pop culture phenomenon itself. But as a movie it exceeded all my expectations, and I’m very satisfied. Thanks, Marvel. It’s been a good run <3

[elenafisher]

chelsea watches (read: is agonized by) “avengers: endgame”

i just got home from endgame and i have a lot to say about it!

OVERALL:

i... liked it? i think? i can’t tell. 

there’s probably going to be a lot of complaining in this post, yet i didn’t actually hate the movie. but there was a lot to digest, so i’m sure my feelings will change over the next couple of weeks.

this movie was edited weird and i think it gave me whiplash. 

the tone was dramatic and desperate, then lighthearted and fun, and then back to dramatic and desperate before i could so much as blink. it was very jarring!

it also made me cry. 

robert downey jr. has always been very earnest in his portrayal of tony stark, but he gave all he had in this one. i was on the edge of tears watching him the whole time, really. there’s definitely a sense of finality to his performance.

those last 20 minutes had me weeping a bit. when they put the arc reactor on the bundle of flowers... oh, my heart. :’(

THE GOOD:

(most of) our characters are back! 

but was there ever any doubt? the stakes were made to feel high, but they never really were. you always came away with the feeling that they were all gonna make it.

no word on vision, though! pretty confused about that one. i know he was killed after the snap occurred, so i don’t think they actually can bring him back, but i always thought that he would, since they have this to film still.

it was very well made. i hope they keep bringing back the people who work on the sets, the cinematography, and the lighting, because it was all so well done.

we need to raise one for alan silvestri and his amazing soundtrack. 

oh, did anyone else notice the emphasis on DAUGHTERS? 

tony’s daughter morgan

scott’s daughter cassie

clint’s daughter lila

thanos’s "daughters”, nebula and gamora

to me, it felt like they were setting up these girls for potentially taking up their father’s mantles, which would actually be cool as fuck.

morgan stark is absolutely the cutest little bean i’ve ever seen in my life. 

I LOVE YOU 3000!

her scenes with tony were so sweet.

that cheeseburger parallel... oh man.

really, every scene that every person shared with tony was really good. you can just feel that everybody was giving everything they had because they knew they only had so much time left to play these characters together, and they wanted to get these final performances right.

tom holland, you heartbreaker. the audience in my theater went absolutely nuts when he finally returned. but when he was crying as he was talking to tony for the last time, oh man. 

“i lost the kid.” please...

THE BAD:

i still don’t really get what they’re doing with thor.

i don’t share this opinion much because this is tumblr and everyone loves this movie, but i didn’t like ragnarok, and i don’t like what’s become of thor or bruce. i wasn’t really checking on these two before, but now they’re just the comedy reliefs of the MCU.

chris hemsworth is funny, of course, and thor is a badass, of course, but they were just trying so hard with him. 

it kind of feels like they’re just pulling him apart, like one group still wants him to be the noble leader of asgard and the other just wants him to be the court jester. so, rather than decide, they just mushed their ideas together.

captain marvel: i knew she wasn’t going to be in the movie much, because she would’ve done everything in, like, 30 minutes, but they really, really underutilized her. seriously, she was only in this one, at most, for five minutes.

but, in those five minutes, she got a new haircut and kicked all kinds of ass, which are both wins.

THE UGLY:

STEVE ROGERS, SIR, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

i can’t believe they hit the undo button on cap’s story.

rather than have him grow and develop in his new role in the future he never wanted or expected to receive, they just had him go back in time to marry the one that got away.

but don’t get me wrong y’all; steve and peggy hurt me so good. i live for their angst. but they weren’t supposed to get together like this!

it’s gross because peggy moved on. she was able to pick up the pieces and create something wonderful for herself by having a fulfilling career and a happy marriage with another man.

steve should’ve accepted her choice. if he loves her so much, he should’ve accepted that he lost her and, since she moved on without him, he has to move on without her.

i can almost get the poetic cinema that they were going for: after tony loses his chance at having a family and living his life, steve is woken up and realizes how much he’s been missing out on, so he decides to go out there and discover what he’s been running away from all this time.

but, rather than do those things, or literally anything else, steve goes back in time to... marry peggy.

like, he could’ve traveled the world with sam and bucky, or gone solo for a while, or even hit up sharon again. 

sharon carter, what a waste. they really couldn’t commit to the idea of her and steve together, could they? 

but as soon as they confirmed sharon to be peggy’s niece, there was just no way a romance could blossom. it’s kind of hilarious how in a cinematic universe where raccoons talk, characters time travel, and AIs can be 3D printed, kissing the niece of your former flame is still considered to be the weirdest thing about it.

seriously: i find it all so vulgar and manipulative.

the one good thing that came out of this was sam wilson, the only worthy captain america, receiving the shield. 

i’ve read that some people are upset that sam got the shield instead of bucky. like, did y’all watch the last movie? let bucky have his plums and his goats. he’s done fighting other people’s wars.

THE EVEN UGLIER:

i got problems, y’all, and those problems have two names: natasha romanoff and clint barton.

i ship these two because everything in the avengers (2012) led me to believe that these super cool assassins who were fighting each other were actually in love with each other and it was them against the world (which doesn’t sound familiar at all, i know).

the characters had history and scarlett johansson and jeremy renner had chemistry. i saw it and i know all y’all saw it. 

so, y’all can imagine how goddamn appalled i was when i first read that natasha and clint were not only not lovers, but that clint actually had a secret family, with a secret wife, on a secret farm, and that we were going to be told this with absolutely no build-up whatsoever. 

but y’all could tell that the russos were as tired as i was when it came to accepting those facts! 

they decided to throw caution to the wind and show some more intimacy between natasha and clint, which was delicious. finally, some good fucking food.

i mean, the necklace? she was wearing her necklace again!

to me, it seemed like natasha had fallen in love with him all those years ago, but he was either already married or had turned her down (or both?), and she was never able to act on her feelings for him. i think that clint was also in love... and perhaps knew that he could never be with her, because of their lifestyles and her past, and chose laura instead. or something agonizing and unfulfilling like that.

(i really hope her upcoming movie expands on this.)

and i do think that she loved him. like, romantically. she couldn’t stop touching him the whole movie (HER HANDS ON HIS FACE!!! she’s so worried for him i’m crying) and was shaking, she was so relieved, upon being reunited with him.

it is some consolation that no matter what, you are never able to deny that natasha and clint love each other: even when they’re not romantic partners, they are definitely platonic life partners. their mutual devotion to one another, in almost every universe in the comics and in these movies, is incredibly strong and moving. 

so, rather than endure clint’s death, natasha chose to sacrifice herself so that he could get the stone and, ultimately, be reunited with his family. and, on paper, it sounds okay... except, it really isn’t.

y’all wanna know why it’s not okay?

it’s not okay because natasha was an original avenger, and we were never given the chance to spend time with her, or become emotionally invested in her journey, or to care about her reasons for making the ultimate sacrifice. 

like, i cared about natasha, but i felt that i would’ve cared so much more (and that the audience could’ve, as well) had we’d been able to have a front row seat to her “atonement” arc. 

because, as an audience, we sort of started in medias res: while she was not initially forthcoming with who she was or what she was doing, natasha came to be seen as a reliable and capable ally by the avengers, her second appearance onscreen. we are given no real reason to distrust her because she’s so desperate to find redemption, which she’s made apparent in almost every movie, and it’s hard to hate somebody working so strongly for another chance.

i mean, this journey would’ve been made so much more badass by us experiencing it firsthand, rather than relying on the hearsay from the directors, writers, and actors. we should’ve gotta a miniseries starring natasha romanoff as the black widow, so we could finally see what she did to become so disgusted with herself and so feared by everyone else. 

this is (partially) why so many people adore bucky. we’ve seen him as the best friend, the fellow comrade, before he was forced to become a mindless killing machine. we’ve seen him kill and cause absolute mayhem. but now we’re watching bucky grow out from that and become something more (and, hopefully, something better). 

basically, natasha romanoff should’ve received that same treatment. we needed to explore all of her facets, not just some of them. 

tl;dr: we should’ve had more time with natasha.

it’s also not okay because natasha’s sacrifice, one that was both irreversible and absolutely pivotal to the fate of the final battle, was not given nearly the same amount of respect that tony received after his demise.

while we all owe a lot to robert downey jr. for his choice to portray, and continue portraying, tony stark / iron man, he is not the most important avenger. 

it’s also worth noting that he did not have to be the one to snap his fingers. i mean, anyone could’ve been given what tony was wearing and then wielded the gauntlet. but, like natasha, he made a choice to sacrifice his life for the greater good.

yet, only tony was given an elaborate funeral. no matter how you slice it, it’s enormously disrespectful to a veteran team member. for this ultimate sacrifice to be made by the only woman on the original crew is doubly insulting.

AND ALL OF THIS IS MADE WORSE BY THE FACT that natasha’s death mirrors gamora’s. they’re identical, right down to the music that plays and how the camera focuses on their bloody bodies.

the russos were probably trying to invoke poetic cinema again here, but the scene comes across as somewhat lazy and insincere. like, they can’t even kill her right!

as terrible as this scene is, i want to give scarlett and jeremy a round of applause for it. you really got the sense that these characters were more than ready to die for each other, and that’s only because scarlett and jeremy were able to sell the emotional intimacy of the scene so well. 

all of it is too little, too late, however.

allow me to conclude this rambling nonsense by stating that i also think they condensed her character arc too much. like, i know this branches off of what i was just talking about a dozen bullet points ago, but even if natasha were to receive this ending, i feel that she received it too soon, y’know?

there should’ve been more scenes in the previous films dedicated to her, and her feelings, and how she relates to any given situation, because another problem that drags this scene down is the lack of any information about natasha. 

like, even when assembled with the other avengers, she feels remote.

perhaps that’s intentional, given that the character’s a spy and has been enigmatic about every other area of her life for so many years. but i think she’s been written to be too enigmatic.

[doodlelolly0910]

Close Encounters of the Spiritual Kind

Summary: Emma Nolan spent a lot of time alone, and that was fine by her. Because one is never truly alone. She should know. She can talk to dead people. What she didn’t expect was one of these spiritual encounters to hang around, taking her down a rabbit hole of missing women, revenge, and, least expected, love. Can she save the day and Killian Jones? Is there even another choice?

Read it from the beginning on AO3 and FFN!

A/N: So here we are at chapter 14! I cannot believe how far we are already! I have about 5-6 more chapters planned for this fic, but we will see how it goes lol. This is a really pivotal chapter not only for Hook, but for the development of things moving forward, in a few ways. As always, THANK YOU to every single person who reads, reviews, reblogs, or even looks this piece's way. I appreciate all of you more than you know! A very special thank you to @kmomof4 (it's her birthday today!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY KRYSTAL!!!!) who is the best beta I could have ever asked for this fic, and thank you thank you thank you to @courtorderedcake for the gorgeous art banner she put together for this piece. 14 chapters in and it still blows me away every single time. Hope you guys like the new chapter!

Chapter 14

The world was black and Emma was blind.

“Emma.”

A voice rang out in the darkness. She knew that voice.

“Emma, it's time to wake up, lass.”

Wake up. Yes, that was a good idea. Maybe she couldn't see because her eyes were closed.

“Killian is waiting for you.”

Killian? Oh, yes. Hook. But why was he waiting for her? Right. Will Scarlett. At Gold’s place.

“Wake up, Emma.”

No, that wasn't right. She just saw him at the docks, didn’t she? And then the call from Gold…

“Lass. Come back.”

A ringing started in her ears. It grew louder and louder until she thought her eardrums might burst.

“Wake up.”

A face flickered in her vision, the first thing she'd been able to see, curly copper hair, soft blue eyes, stern, handsome features. The ringing drowned out everything but his voice. She tried to call out to him, his name passing her lips on reflex, but she couldn't even hear her own voice.

“Wake up.”

“LIAM!”

Emma bolted upright, drenched in sweat and her heart pounding so hard she feared it might break a rib. Her hand pressed to the skin above it, almost as if to hold it in her chest.

“Easy, Swan, easy.” She heard someone say and her head snapped to the side. Her eyes connected to Killian's like a magnet to metal.

Then the consequences of her sudden movements caught up with her.

Her shoulder and hip felt like they were on fire and Killian crouched beside her was the only thing in her line of sight that was in focus. She was definitely going to be sick. She must have paled or turned green or some other indicator that the very little she had eaten in the last day was about to make a reappearance because in the moment her body decided to heave, a small plastic trash can was shoved under her face.

“Oh, God,” Emma groaned, her voice sounding hollow bouncing from the sides of the receptacle. She spit into the container and lifted her head.  Once he was sure she was spent, Killian removed the bin and stowed it beside the raggedy couch she was on.

“Back in the Fun Room, I see,” she said as her surroundings became a little clearer, recognizing the couch, the metal desk with the hole in it, and that fucking beam. The throbbing in her head was no less, though, and she realized the ringing in her ears, while not as loud as before, was definitely going to be there for awhile.

“I wasn't sure if I'd have to tie you back up or not,” Hook replied with a nonchalant shrug as he stood and Emma's head screamed in protest as she jerked her gaze to his again, a chill running down her spine. “You hit your head quite a bit harder this time, though, so I thought I might take my chances.” Killian walked away back towards the desk and Emma's hand went up automatically to find the wound on the crown of her head had reopened and there was freshly dried blood in her hair again. She winced and hissed as her fingertips grazed the area, her eyes looking to where Hook was now, leaning against the desk with his arms folded across his broad chest.

As before, he had a few things laid out on the surface next to him, that ridiculous knife, a binder, black this time, and something else that made her heart stop. She felt all the blood drain from her face and her arm lowered slowly from where it had been inspecting her injury.

A gun sat well away from the rest of the objects, like it was on display, which it probably was, considering it was her gun, her badge propped neatly against it, along with her keys.

“I do believe we should have a chat, Detective Nolan.”

Emma swallowed hard, feeling the action sharply in her temples, and a rush of jasmine billowed around her, almost making her feel like Milah was trying to protect her. Of course Milah was here still.

“What do you want me to say, Hook?” Emma's voice was barely audible, the tightness in her throat strangling the words as they came out.

“Let's try the truth this time, shall we?” His voice was dark and calm, like the sea before a storm, a malevolent gleam in his darkened blue eyes.

“Alright,” she said and turned to place her feet flat on the floor. She grimaced at the pain flowing through her body as she moved.

“Alright. So, you're a police officer.” It wasn't a question.

“I am. A detective in missing persons, to be specific.”

“And Gold?”

“I'm undercover right now investigating a string of missing women and at least one body that we've been able to link back circumstantially to him,” she told him honestly. Honesty was probably going to be the only chance she had at leaving here intact.

“And that's how you found me and how you know so much about me and my life, your research into Gold,” he prompted.

“No, the only thing that turned up when I searched your name that connected you to Gold was a slew of charges you were arrested for back in 2010 when you were fresh off the boat. Imagine my surprise when you turned out to be the mysterious ‘Hook’ as well.” She leaned forward, the bruised muscles in her shoulder and hip sparking with pain at the motion as she settled her forearms on her thighs.

“So my name and my more colorful moniker are not yet synonymous. Good to know. How did you learn of me before Gold, then? My name, that is. What prompted you to search for me?” His words were genuinely curious, as if he were solving an equation.

“Ah,” she said, clearing the tightness from her throat again. “That was Milah. And Liam. The medium part was true. I never expected to find you in the middle of all this.”

“Oh, not this bit again,” Killian scoffed.

Emma felt her temper rise up in her chest. "You know what, Hook?” she snapped, struggling not to wince as she pushed herself to standing. “I don't give a shit if you believe me or not anymore." "How can I believe anything you say?!” He stormed towards her, his own anger slipping through the cracks of his carefully constructed facade. “Please, enlighten me, love. What brilliant bit of wisdom have the fates imparted upon you just now? Hmm?"

Stubborn arse, Milah said irritably. Emma snorted a laugh. "I don't know about the fates, but Milah thinks you're a stubborn ass." Killian did an almost comical double take. Idiot, the disembodied voice added. "And an idiot," Emma repeated with a smug smirk. "I am not stubborn, nor an idiot," he protested, sounding much like a petulant child, to Emma's great amusement. See. "She thinks you're proving her point," Emma replied, raising an eyebrow. "I kind of agree." "Oh, just bloody perfect. Gang up on me with a figment of your imagination." Hook ran his hand through his hair, tugging at the ends, frustrated. Listen, agrà, Milah murmured. "She wants you to listen to me, and she said that agrà word again." Emma folded her arms over her chest and stood her ground. "How the fuck did you learn that word?" he growled, stepping towards her and into her space. His chest almost brushed hers with every deep breath he took, and she could practically feel the tension vibrating off of him. "Milah," she replied with a nod, slowly enunciating the syllables and widening her eyes exaggeratedly.

He held her gaze, silence extending between the two of them, like he was willing her to say something different. Something he could accept as the truth. He let out a growl of irritation when she didn’t budge, turning and veritably stomping away from her. "Alright, let's play this game, then, Swan. Tell me something only she would know,” he snapped, leaning against the desk again and fiddling with his hook, rubbing the prosthetic like it was bothering him just as much as this whole discussion was, an action that did not go unnoticed by Emma. This exchange was going just as she expected it would have with anyone she revealed herself to, but it also still stung, no matter how she'd prepared for something like this her entire life. "You mean besides the ring thing and the nickname?" she pointed out. Killian glared. Cock and bull, Milah interrupted the rising hostility between the two. Emma flushed red at Milah's words and Killian visibly took notice of her change in demeanor. She knew it meant something different, but she couldn't help wanting to curl up in a ball and die at the thought of saying that word to this man, especially with the strain in the air already. She felt like a 15 year old girl. "What is it now?" he asked, raising an eyebrow and drawing her attention away from her own self loathing and embarrassment. "Uh, cock and bull," Emma muttered, reddening further. Killian's other brow swiftly made the climb up his forehead to join the first, his mouth dropping open slightly in sheer shock. He snapped it closed and narrowed his eyes, studying her. "Are you... embarrassed, Swan? You know it doesn't mean..." he gestured in front of him and she made a noise of exasperation. "I know, jackass," she snapped. "Get your mind out of the gutter." "Seems you had already beaten me to the gutter on that one, love," he teased, like he couldn't resist. "Whatever. Does it ring a bell or not?" He paused. "Aye." "So you believe me." "No." Stubborn mule pig headed arse. Emma laughed out loud, clapping a hand over her mouth immediately against the sound as pain exploded through her tender head, and Killian raised an eyebrow in question. Emma rolled her eyes and resisted the urge to stamp her foot. Apparently she was pulling out all the stops on the Teenage Angst Express today. She dropped her hand carefully, as not to jar her injured shoulder further before speaking again. "She's making a colorful point. About you." "Enough of this!" he roared but this time, Emma wasn't afraid. She was getting madder herself, in fact. "She says you're stubborn, again. A mule. A pig headed arse," she said, ignoring him and affecting a sarcastic British accent for the last bit. He gave her a dangerous glower and came to stand toe to toe with her once more, his hand balled into a white knuckled fist at his side, clearly trying to intimidate her.

“So I should just believe you because you knew about some pub I was going to open with Milah, then?” he growled.

“You should believe me because I'm telling you the truth! Think about it, Hook. How else would I know about these things?” Emma stared him down, not giving an inch.

His wild blue eyes should have frightened her, and they probably would have a few days ago. But now, she just felt understanding for him. She couldn't explain it, but she couldn't bring herself to be afraid. Her temper didn't help, her own anger dimming all other emotions in her brain. Seconds ticked by, the muscle twitching in his jaw keeping time as Emma's eyes bored into his. "Bah," he growled and turned away from her, pacing back to the metal desk, hand clenching and releasing, reminding Emma very much of an angry panther. It was then that Emma knew that he really wasn't going to hurt her. Tell her the truth, agrà. Emma froze at Milah's urging. "The truth about what, Milah?" she answered out loud, her eyes glued to Killian and he stiffened and spun back around on his heel. "What is she saying?" he asked with genuine curiosity and a sliver of unease, seemingly at the question itself.

“Oh, now you believe me,” Emma huffed in exasperation. Killian looked like he was going to refute the notion again but snapped his mouth shut and pursed his lips against the words, urging her to continue with just his eyes. Stubborn. “She wants you to tell me the truth.”

About Gold, Milah added.

“About Gold,” Emma repeated, her senses on full alert now. “What are you not telling me?”

Killian's jaw ticked again, and he didn't speak.

“Truth and trust run both ways, Killian,” she said and he inhaled sharply, his eyes searing into hers.

“It's a day for the names of the dead, it seems,” he said darkly. Emma blinked at that.

“That's your name, isn't it?” she said, flustered for words. Killian chuckled, a disparaged sound.

“That man is gone. He died with Milah and Liam,” he spat, tracing his finger along the edge of his prosthetic. “Hook is what has risen from the ashes.”

“God, you are so dramatic,” Emma laughed out a reply. Hook looked offended, surprised, and even slightly impressed in one fell swoop.

Always dramatic, Milah added and Emma snorted again.

“Milah says you've always been this way,” she filled him in.

“Oh, yes, as she's one to talk. She once screamed the bloody house down over a spider,” he shot back and Emma almost fell over at the acknowledgement of Milah's presence.

Jasmine swirled around her, a happy little flush of fragrance.

Big spider. Deadly. He went to hospital for a splinter.

“You went to the hospital for a splinter?” Emma raised an eyebrow and the pointed tips of Killian's ears flushed pink, in embarrassment this time, rather than rage. His hand came up to scratch behind his ear, giving him away completely.

“My foot went through a rotted board on the dock! I was impaled by a half the bloody plank!” he defended.

Splinter, Milah reaffirmed and Emma had had enough.

“Can we have this little lovers spat another time?” Emma near shouted, her eyes screwing shut against the throbbing in her temples and crown of her head. “What are you not telling me about Gold?”

“Why did you scream my brother’s name when you woke up?” he asked, refusing to answer her.

“Because I had an encounter with him while I was unconscious. He visits my dreams a lot. Now, tell me about Gold,” she demanded, trying to pull the focus where it was important.

“Is Liam here now as well?”

“No. Are you going to tell me about Gold?”

“I didn’t intend to, no.”

“Then I'm fucking leaving. I'm not wasting any more of my time here.” Emma marched over to the desk, intent on retrieving her gun and badge, but she should have known he was going to stop her. His hand closed around her bicep a moment later.

“Wait just a second.” The muscles of his jaw worked beneath the skin and scruff there, as if he were trying to work out the words to say.

“I don't have a second. I have to call my handler and sort this whole mess out. I don't have time to play games with you. I told you the truth, you don't believe me, that's your problem,” she snapped and tried to move around him again but his grip tightened, holding her in place.

“I've already texted him from your phone. Chapelle, right?” he replied. Emma's heart dipped into her stomach. “I spoke as you, let him know you were safe and that you'd call when the job was done.”

“Why?” She couldn't tell if the breathless quality of her voice was from fear or awe.

“Because we needed to talk.” He shrugged.

“And yet all you've done is argue with me, and Milah through me, and we've gotten exactly nowhere.” She yanked her arm from his grasp and stormed back to the couch, sitting down in a huff and massaging her aching skull.

She felt a dip in the cushion beside her, taking her by surprise. She peeked at Hook from the corner of one eye. He was gazing at her with a soft expression, his breathing more calm and even and he scrubbed a broad palm over his face, his jaw relaxing as he rubbed at it.

“You're right, Swan. This is just… it's just a lot to take in. And I've worked too hard to protect myself and take down Gold once and for all for it to be ruined because I got tangled up with the police.” Emma looked like she might interrupt him but he cut her off. “What I'm saying is I believe you, love. Despite my better judgement, I trust you're telling me the truth. And I think we can take Gold down together.”

Emma was sure her jaw had hit the floor. She stared blankly at him, periodically stammering out a few vowel sounds and he chuckled, reaching up slowly and tipping her mouth shut with a knuckle under her chin. He skimmed his thumb over the flesh there, just under her lip, and she felt heat unexpectedly rush to the surface of every inch of her skin even after he withdrew.

Work with him, Milah urged, interrupting whatever had just passed between them. Emma schooled her features into something more controlled and cleared her throat.

“What did you have in mind?”

Hook grinned at her acquiescence and stood, making his way back to retrieve the binder on the desk. He sat beside her and propped the binder on his hook, flipping it open and scooting so his thigh was pressed against hers. She felt dizzy. It was probably more the head wound than his closeness. Probably.

“Here, this is a shipping yard that Gold works out of,” he tapped on the page with dexterous fingers, showing several highlighted sections of an aerial map. “We have mapped out shipment processes and schedules, as well as security and entry points. We often use it to take shipments and keep ourselves afloat, but something big has been happening lately. They're moving something that has significantly more value than black market art and finery. Security has nearly doubled.”

“What does that have to do with my case?” Emma asked, leaning in to get a better look.

“Maybe nothing. Maybe everything.” He shrugged, his shoulder brushing hers, and she stiffened slightly at the innocent contact. The spicy scent of his cologne invaded her senses and overwhelmed the jasmine that usually took residence there. “Fact is, if we can find out, you have leverage, darling. You can use it to find your women, if they are truly connected to him.”

Emma thought about this for a moment. Now that she was clearly out with Gold, this was her best option. Maybe she could work out some kind of deal for Hook as well, since he was being so cooperative. She could take down Gold, save these women, and save Killian Jones, all in the same instance. This would work. It had to.

“Alright, Killian,” she felt his breath hitch again beside her when she said his name, “I can work with this. You've got a deal.”

She looked up from the page at him and realized just how close he was. She could feel the warmth of his breath fanning over her cheek, and the blue of his eyes was even brighter up close, like two glittering pools of ocean water drawing her in. If she wasn't careful, she was afraid she could drown in them. His tongue poked out, tracing the inside of his bottom lip slowly, and she didn't even realize that she'd tracked the motion with her eyes until the corner of his mouth lifted in a satisfied smirk.

“Aye, love. I think we'll make quite the team.”

[weekendwarriorblog]

WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND November 8, 2019 – DOCTOR SLEEP, MIDWAY, LAST CHRISTMAS, MARRIAGE STORY and more

Well, last weekend was a thing, wasn’t it? The movie I liked the most didn’t do great, the movie I really wasn’t into did better than expected, and Terminator: Dark Fate? Yeah, that’s the end of that franchise… hopefully?

This week, there’s some good, some bad and some okay to decent. I’m probably under embargo on the two bad movies so you’ll just have to guess which is which.

Actually, I already reviewed Mike Flanagan’s DOCTOR SLEEP (Warner Bros.) over at The Beat, and my review of Roland Emmerich’s MIDWAY (Lionsgate) will probably havegone up over there by the time you’ve read this. That just leaves Universal’s holiday rom-com LAST CHRISTMAS and Paramount’s PLAYING WITH FIRE.

Doctor Sleepis the latest Stephen King adaptation, this one based on his 2013 novel that is a sequel to The Shining, the movie starring Ewan McGregor as the older Danny Torrance, Rebecca Ferguson as “Rose the Hat” and newcomer Kyliegh Curran as Abra Stone, a young girl with powers who turns to Danny to help her face Rose and her gang of roving power vampires. As you can read in my review, this one isn’t so bad, and if you’re a fan of The Shining, there’s stuff for you to enjoy even though it’s not nearly as scary.

Not sure what more I can say about Midway, other than it’s Emmerich’s version of the WWII Pacific battle with a mostly-male cast that includes Woody Harrelson, Patrick Wilson, Aaron Eckhart, Randy Quaid and many more, most of whom have done better work. Basically, I wasn’t a fan, and I’m not sure how well it will do even with Monday being Veterans Day. I’ll be curious to see how others feel about the movie.

Also, not much to say about Playing with Fire other than its John Cena doing a family comedy with director Andy Fickman, Kegan Michael-Key, John Leguizamo, the wonderful Judy Greer, and honestly, I doubt anyone who might read this column would have any interest. Put it this way, it’s no Instant Family, one of my favorite movies from last year.

In many ways, my favorite movie of the weekend is Last Christmas, directed by Paul Feig from Bridesmaids and Ghostbusters, which is indeed based loosely on the George Michael song of the same name, but it brings together Emilia Clarke with Henry Golding from Crazy Rich Asians, as well as Michelle Yeoh from Crazy Rich Asians, and Emma Thompson, who co-wrote the film.

I’ll have an interview with Feig over at Next Best Picture very soon, but here’s my short review…

Mini-Review: You know you have to be doing something right if you make a Christmas rom-com that’s able to get a Jew into the Christmas spirit while watching your movie even before Halloween, but that’s the case with this great collaboration between Paul Feig with Emma Thompson.

I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I was definitely surprised by how much I liked Emilia Clarke in the role of a fuck-up who can’t seem to find a regular living place since her roommates keep kicking her out. She works at a Christmas shop in London’s busy market owned by Michelle Yeoh, who is lovingly known as “Santa.” One night, her character Kate encounters a handsome and mysterious young man named Tom (Henry Golding), and the two become friends and then get closer.

It’s pretty amazing to see Clarke doing something we really haven’t seen her do before and that’s being funny, but she also sings in the movie and has a nature that some might deem “Manic Pixie Dream Girl”-ish. In fact, she plays an elf. (rimshot) It’s hard not to think of Zooey Deschanel in Elf as you watch Clarke spend time in her work costume but Kate is very likable and nothing like Clark’s previous roles. Golding is as charming and handsome as ever, making him come across like the new Hugh Grant, but their scenes together propel Last Christmas into a place where you really feel for both of them.

There are aspects to Last Christmas that are predictable, including a twist that’s literally spoiled in the first few minutes of the movie, but the movie is just so enjoyable overall that this can be forgiven. Even if you’re the worst Scrooge about the holidays, it’s hard not to enjoy all of the Christmas spirit permeating this movie, particularly Yeoh’s character, but it also finds a way to make you feel good about helping others during the holidays, something that I hope rubs off on anyone who sees this.

Basically, Last Christmas is a romantic comedy that’s actually romantic and very funny, as well as a great way to kick-off the holiday movie season! It’s taken some time, but Love Actually finally has a worthy successor.

Rating: 8/10

You can read more about the new wide releases over at The Beat.

LOCAL FESTIVALS

The big festival hitting New York this weekend, today in fact, is this year’s installation of DOC-NYC, which boasts 300 films and events circulating around the world of documentary filmmaking, including many World Premieres, as well as screenings of some of the year’s biggest commercial and critical hits in terms of docs.

Oddly, tonight’s Opening Night is Daniel Roher’s Once Were Brothers: Robbie Robertson and the Band, which was also the opening night gala of TIFF this year. I still haven’t seen it. Closing night is the NYC premiere of Ebs Burnough’s The Capote Tapes, which I also haven’t seen. The festival is giving Visionary Tribute Lifetime Achievement awards to Michael Apted, who will screen the latest in his ongoing doc series, 63 Up, as well as to Martin Scorsese, whose Netflix film Rolling Thunder Revue: A Bob Dylan Story will screen. I actually haven’t seen too many movies in this year’s festival just cause I’ve been busy with other things, but I have seen Joe Berlinger’s The Longest Wave about windsurfer icon Robby Naish and Keith Fulton and Lou Pepe’s He Dreams of Giants, a great follow-up to Lost in La Mancha, which follows Terry Gilliam’s efforts to finally make The Man Who Killed Don Quixote. Other movies include the World Premiere of Beth B’s Lydia Lunch: The War is Never Over on Saturday night, the NYC Premieres of Oren Jacoby’s On Broadway, Beth Kopple’s Desert One, Kristof Bilsen’s Mother plus many more. (On top of that, my own group, the Critics Choice Association will be announcing its own Critics Choice Documentary Awards this Sunday.)

LIMITED RELEASES

There are two can’t-miss movies this weekend, the first of them being Noah Baumbach’s latest Marriage Story, which in my opinion is the best film he’s made in his entire career, and that’s saying something. This one stars Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson as a couple going through a divorce, and if this sounds familiar, it might be since Baumbach’s 2005 movie The Squid and The Whale was also about a divorce, that of his parents. It’s hard not to think that at least some of Marriage Story might be based on Baumbach’s own divorce from actor Jennifer Jason Leigh as Driver plays a theater director and Johansson plays an actor who appears in many of his plays. The real sticking point is their 6-year-old son and the fact that Johansson’s character wants to put him in school in California where she has an upcoming job, but his father, who is about to bring his play to Broadway without his wife, wants him in New York. At first, the couple plan on divorcing without lawyers and remaining friends, but as lawyers are brought on board – played by Laura Dern, Alan Alda and Ray Liotta – things just get more vicious. Not only is this one of Baumbach’s best-realized screenplay but the performances he gets out of his cast are indelible, particularly Driver and Johansson who have a number of highly charged scenes together, including one that’s absolutely unforgettable. It’s easily one of the best movies of the year, and it will be very much in the awards race. Marriage Story opens on Wednesday (today!) in New York – at the City Cinemas (formerly the Paris Theatre) and IFC Center – in L.A. and a few other cities. It won’t debut on Netflix until December 6.

Another movie that definitely needs to be seen is HONEY BOY (NEON), written by and starring Shia LaBeouf and directed by Alma Har’el, who has previously directed documentaries and music videos. It’s loosely based on some of LaBeouf’s own experiences as a child actor dealing with a turbulent relationship with his father with Noah Jupe from A Quiet Place and next week’s Ford vs. Ferrari playing the young actor “Otis Lort” who later in life (played by Lucas Hedges) is dealing with the repercussions of an alcoholic father, played by LaBeaouf, apparently based on his own father? It’s a really amazing film that obviously was extremely cathartic for LaBeouf to write while he was going through his own rehab therapy, plus he also has singer FKA twigs making her feature film debut as an amorous neighbor of Otis who lives at the motel where he stays with his father. I’m not going to say too much more about the film other than it’s extremely powerful and emotional

There are a couple decent docs opening this weekend, the one I recommend first and foremost being Roger Ross Williams’ THE APOLLO, which will open at the Metrographafter opening this year’s Tribeca Film Festival. It’s an amazing look at the landmark Harlem theater that’s made so many careers over the years from performers like Aretha Franklin and James Brown, combining amazing archival footage with new interviews.

I haven’t gotten around to seeing Lauren Greenfield’s new documentaryThe Kingmaker (Showtime), which will open at the Quad Cinema in New York before it airs on Showtime, but this one is about the political career of Imelda Marcos, the Philippines’ first lady who became almost more famous than her President husband Ferdinand, mainly for her collection of shoes.

Samuel Bathrick’s doc 16 Bars opens at New York’s Village East Cinema and in L.A. next Friday. It follows Arrested Development’s “Speech” Thomas as he works with in mates in a Virginia jail to write and record original music as part of their rehabilitation.

Netflix is also releasing Despicable Me co-creator Sergio Pablos’ animated film Klaus in theaters this Friday in advance of its worldwide streaming debut on Netflix on November 15. It features Jason Schwartzmann as the voice of Jesper, a spoiled rich kid son of the postmaster who is sent to a frozen island in the Arctic circle where he finds allies in a local schoolteacher (voiced by Rashida Jones) and meets a mysterious carpenter named Klaus (voiced by J.K. Simmons).

Opening at New York’s Cinema Village is Joel Souza’s CROWN VIC (Screen Media) starring Thomas Jane as a veteran cop with Luke Kleintank (also in Midway) as his rookie cop who are looking for a missing girl and hunting two cop killers in Los Angeles. It also stars Bridge Moynihan.

Nicolas Cage stars in PRIMAL (Lionsgate) as Frank Walsh, a hunter and collector of rare and exotic animals who catches a rare white jaguar, except that the ship taking his cargo also includes a political assassin being sent to the U.S. who breaks free and lets the jaguar loose. So this is like Life of Pi only with more Nicolas Cage? It also stars Famke Janssen, Kevin Durand and Michael Imperioli and opens in select cities asnd On Demand.

Similarly, Danger Close (Saban Films) will be in theatrs, On Demand and Digital, this one starring Travis Fimmel (Warcraft) as Major Harry Smith in Kriv Stenders’ war movie, written by Stuart Beattie. It follows Smith as he takes a group of 108 young soldiers from Australia and New Zealand into the Battle of Long tan against 2,500 Viet Cong soldiers. I guess this is an alternative to Midway for Veterans’ Day?

STREAMING AND CABLE

Debuting on Netflix is Luke Snellin’s holiday rom-com Let It Snow, starring Isabela Moner (Dora and the Lost City of Gold), Odeya Rush, Shameik Moore and Liv Hewson as a group of high school seniors in a Midwestern town who are snowbound on Christmas Eve. It’s based on a book by John Green, Maureen Johnson and Lauren Myracle.

REPERTORY

Let’s get to some old(er) movies, starting with the Metrograph in New York, who begins a series with filmmaker Noah Baumbach in Residence in conjunction with the release of Baumbach’s latest and greatest, Marriage Story. Besides screening Baumbach’s own 1995 film Kicking and Screaming, 2005’s The Squid and the Whale and 2007’s Margot at the Wedding, Baumbach will present screenings of Spike Lee’s Crooklyn (1994) on Saturday, Eric Rohmer’s Pauline at the Beach (1983), which inspired Margot with more movies to come between now and November 22. The Metrograph also continues its Welcome To Metrograph: Redux series with Shunji Iwai’s 2001 film All About Lily Chou-Chouon Thursday and again on Saturday. This weekend’s Playtime: Family Matinees is Steven Spielberg’s 1981 classic Raiders of the Lost Ark, while Late Nites at Metrograph  will screen Bong Joon-wo’s The Host on Thursday through Sunday, way too late for this old man. You’ll also have another opportunity to see Hitchcock’s 1971 thriller Frenzy on Thursday night.

TheFilm Forumwill be screening Yasujirô Ozu’s 1957 film Tokyo Twilight in a new 4k restoration starting Friday, as well as bringing back his 1953 film Tokyo Story, as well, continuing from the Shatamachi series which ends Thursday. The Forum is also screening Henry King’s 1949 movie Twelve O’Clock a few more times this weekend, and on Sunday and Monday, it will screen Rowland Brown’s 1933 film Blood Money. This weekend’s Film Forum Jr. is George Lucas’ American Graffiti.

The IFC Center is gonna be pretty busy with Doc-NYC (see above) but its Waverly Midnights: Spy Games offering will be Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997) and Late Night Favorites: Autumn 2019 will screen Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange (one of my favorites).

Opening at the Quad on Friday is a 4k 20thAnniversary restoration of Joan Micklin Silver’s A Fish in the Bathtub, starring real-life husband-wife comedy duo Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara. The 1999 comedy from the director of Hester Street and Crossing Delancey is about a woman who finally had enough with her stubborn husband so she moves in with her married son (played by Mark Ruffalo!!!), driving him crazy enough to convince his sister (Jane Adams) to try to repair the relationship.

The Roxy Cinema will be screening Valley Girlo n Weds and  Alan Parker’s 1984 film Birdy on Thursday, both starring Nicolas Cage, and the 1979 film Draculastarring Frank Langella on Saturday.

Uptown at Film at Lincoln Center, they’re kicking off a short series called Jessica Hausner: The Miracle Worker, including a sneak preview of her sci-fi thriller Little Joe, and showing her earlier films Amour Fou, Hotel,Lourdes, Lovely Ritaand a bunch of shorts.

MOMA continues Modern Matinees: Iris Barry’s History of Film and Vision Statement: Early Directorial Works, the latter showing Sebastian Silva’s The Maidon Wednesday evening, Jane Campion’s The Piano on Thursday, Debra Granik’s Down to the Bone on Friday, John Cassavetes’ Shadows(1959) on Saturday and Kelly Reichardt’s Old Joy (2006) on Sunday, as well as Cristian Mungiu’s 4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days.

The Alamo Drafthouse in Brooklyn will show Tom Hanks’ The ‘Burbs on Thursday night in conjunction with Rotten Tomatoes, then next Monday’s Fist City is America Ninja 2: the Confrontation from 1987, Terror Tuesday is one of my favorites, Final Destination 3 (2006) and Weird Wednesday is the 1984 film Decoder.

Out in Astoria, the Museum of the Moving Image will screen Paul Verhoeven’s Starship Troopers (1997) on Saturday as part of its ongoing “No Joke: Absurd Comedy as Political Reality” series. Friday night, its showing Godfrey Reggio’s 1982 classic Koyaanisqatsi, introduced by Ramell Ross as part of his “Some Other Lives of Time: Subjective Spaces for Nonfiction” series. I have no idea what that means. MOMI is also showing Vassilis Douvilis’ The Homecoming as part of “Always on Sunday: Greek Film Series,” which apparently has returned after a six-month hiatus.

Out in L.A., Tarantino’s New Beverly has been showing double features of Jackie Brown with Lewis Teague’s 1980 film Alligator, and no, I don’t know the connection either. Friday’s horror matinee is David Cronenberg’s The Brood while the midnight movies are Pulp Fiction on Friday night and Maniac Cop 3: Badge of Silence on Saturday night. The Kiddee Matinee is one of my faves, The 7th Voyage of Sinbad and then Monday’s matinee is James Mangold’s Cop Land, starring Sylvester Stallone. Next Tuesday’s wacky triple feature is Stunts, Walking the Edge and The Kinky Coches and the Pom-Pom Pussycats. Now THAT is what I call a triple feature...

The Egyptian Theatre is showing Martin Scorsese’s The Irishman in a limited engagement but on Saturday, it will show Raoul Levy’s Hail, Mafia! (1965) as part of “Joe Dante’s 16mm Spotlight” with Mr. Dante in person. Over at the Aero, they’re having a series called “All the Right Stuff: The Artistry of Phillip Kaufman with the director in person and double features of Raiders of the Lost Arkand The Wanderers on Friday, Invasion of the Body Snatchers/The Great Northfield Minnesota Raid on Saturday and The Unbearable Lightness of Being on Sunday (with Juliette Binoche)!

The Friday midnight at Landmark’s Nuart Theater is the anime classic Akira.

Next week, James Mangold’s Ford vs. Ferrari takes on Elizabeth Banks’ Charlie’s Angels and Bill Condon’s The Good Liar, starring Ian McKellen and Helen Mirren.

[i-am-adlocked]

[soulmate au] Everything is Grey

The world is black and white until one meets the other half. FRIENDSHIP, FLUFF, TRAGEDY By CA Hawkins WORD COUNT: 5701

AN: Here it is, an original story by moi. Idea came from Tumblr tho.

I’ve always found it so amusing when the coloured-eyed describe colours to the greyed-eyed. You meet and go with people who complain and look around for clothes to match their shoes, their eyes, their shirt... and you understand why: because they can see colours—because they’ve met their soulmates.

I had always envied them.

Not everyone has met their soulmates but had still ended up with the people they love. Some met their soulmates with their best friends. Some romantic soulmate relationships end due to the fact that they are destined to be together platonically.

The universe may say who your soulmate is—but you can never be sure what your fate together will be.

Speaking of fate, I have four best friends whom I love with all my heart. I don’t think they’ve met their soulmates yet either.

Two girls and two boys.

We all met about six years ago when we were all chosen from our university for some government research I cannot talk about in public... but even though we had finished the research after two quick months (much to the surprise of our superiors), the five of us had kept in touch and we had always spent some time together—mostly drinking in a pub.

Eventually, we all moved to the same city since we all love it here—in London. None of us have close relatives anyway and so we consider ourselves as a family.

Lawrence is a quiet kind of bloke, but he always keeps everyone smiling. He drives us everywhere and he seems to know every pub in the city—which is great! He is a bit shy with the ladies, though. I don’t know why he’s so insecure... He’s the most knowledgeable one in the group and he’s also incredibly sweet.

Sweeney is a rather sarcastic snob and a bit of an arsehole (maybe not a bit) but we keep him in our little family—only because he is extremely loyal and he will, apparently, die in our name. Of course, we also love him... unfortunately.

Felicity is loud. She loves cracking jokes and she loves playing guitar. She’s a heavy drinker but never gets a hangover—flirty but has great integrity—rather brilliant in her own explicable way, and a bit self-centred at times, but would also sit beside you all night if you need it.

Scarlett, my best friend, isn’t very talkative. She most likely has a lot of secrets and is definitely the most mysterious of us all. Oh she’s the most brilliant person I had ever met, and I don’t think there’s anything she can’t do... Oh, wait, she was a bloody horrible flatmate (but she moved in with Lawrence four years ago because his flat is closer to her work than mine)... and a bit of a lazy git at times, but that’s her in a nutshell. 

Still, despite their differences, I’m glad that they were all rather happy for me when I told them that I can finally see colours.

They ask me what it was like, and how it feels like.

“Well... it’s hard to explain,” I answer. Ironically, that’s the answer I hated the most when I asked colleagues before, back when I was greyed-eyed. Well, it is hard to describe.

“How did it happen?” Lawrence asks, interrupting. He always knows what’s the right thing to say or ask. That’s why he’s our group’s leader so to speak.

I tell them the day I first met my boyfriend. 

The first colour I saw was his beautiful brown eyes. I knew then what my favourite colour is: Brown... like the colour of chocolate (I’m still giddy that I can finally understand people when they associate colour with descriptions).

I tell them that Scarlett and I were heading to the pub—just the two of us to hang out—and we decided to go through the park for a shortcut. When I got distracted by a really good violinist who was performing in the middle of the park, Scarlett decided to be a bitch and ditched me... again.

I decided to ask the man nearest to me if he had seen a woman wearing a scarf. When he turned around and looked at me, that’s when the colours exploded in front of me.

I bet we both looked liked two idiot boys, standing in the middle of the park, mouths agape, looking at the world for the first time. Well, to be honest, we kind of did look at the world for the first time—in colour.

“So, this is what the sky looks like,” he whispered to himself, looking up at the blue colour of the sky everyone talked about.

“And this is what green looks like,” I whispered back, looking down at the grass, or is it green? There are so many colours.

I tell my friends that I almost cried that day—that i was so overwhelmed with the plethora of colours and the emotion that I’m seeing the world for the first time. I thought I was going to hyperventilate with happiness.

“God, this is so beautiful,” I whispered to the stranger.

“Howard Ainsley.” He smiled at me, offering his hand.

“Winter Elingston,” I replied, breathing out.

I was talking to my soulmate, for goodness’ sake! I never knew this would happen in such a boring frustrated day. To think that I was merely going to ask a stranger for directions, then boom fucking colours everywhere.

I will never forget that look of surprise on his face.

“Nice to finally meet you,” he told me with a sweet foolish grin.

“Likewise,” I replied, smiling sweetly. 

The universe... the colours are so... beautiful...

“You’re lucky,” Felicity comments after the silence when i’m done telling them the story.

“I know,” I reply honestly.

I look around the pub—the flashing lights on the dance floor that used to be only bright lights—the number of glasses on the shelves in different shades of the window—the plethora of different shirts in different colours... I might never get used to seeing them...

The world is beautiful—fucked up, of course, but still beautiful.

O N E   Y E A R   L A T E R

I’ve been with Howard for a long long time and I had been asked on what my favourite colour is. For a long time, I’ve always wanted to be asked about this. now, I can never stop feeling the happiness of the realisation that I am so used to this question.

To the colour-eyed, this question becomes a part of their normalcy and it can be easy to forget that not all people are coloured-eyed.

That is my mistake.

“What’s your favourite colour?” I accidentally ask Scarlett, who is spending a week in my flat because I insisted her to.

As much as I love Howard visiting me in my lonely flat, I still miss my best friend making her own mess everywhere. It’s boring not to clean up blood (borrowed from the hospital) on the floor and other internal organs cluttered around the kitchen (borrowed from somewhere Scarlett won’t tell me about).

My thoughts about my best friend dissipate at the glare she is giving me. Realising what I had just asked, I shrink in embarrassment.

“Oh God, sorry,” I say, blushing.

“It’s quite alright,” she says in her usual cool tone, but I notice a slight edge in it. “You’re already coloured-eyed. It’s your version of normal, of course. Alas, for me, still, everything is grey,” Scarlett continues, gesturing around in a theatrical manner, “and it probably will for a long long time—forever even.” She shrugs.

Pity. It’s a shame she can’t exactly see how beautifully blue her eyes are. Before, I’ve always thought they were so pale—almost white... but no, they’re startlingly blue. As for me, I just found out I’ve always had dark sea-green eyes.

“I’m sorry,” I mutter again.

“Elingston, stop apologising,” she says sternly. I chuckle to myself because she always loves calling us by our first names—something about not being too close to us, but obviously failing.

In our group of scientists (whom I know consider as family), Scarlett is the most analytically creative between the five of us. Sure, I may be the one who always questions everything; Sweeney may be the one who conjures up the suggestions; Felicity may be the one who never gives up; and Lawrence may be the one who always finds the answer...

...but Scarlett is all of us rolled into one, but instead of everything being a matter of hopeful possibility, it becomes a matter of definite probability—and that’s one of the reason why she’s my best and most trusted friend...

...and inside that façade of hers, I know she is also the most emotional and caring person in the planet—which is probably why she hides her emotions well—too well... No one knows her like we do. The four of us can see through all those clever lies. She’s the most human of us all—probably a side-effect of being nearly all-knowing...

...since emotion and humanity are a part of that brain of hers... but she never shows it. Still, we all assume she’s both aromantic and asexual. Come to think of it, she never says anything about herself much.

I wonder what else she hides in that metaphorically huge head of hers.

Looking at her right now, lying down on the ground, relaxing with her arms being used as her own pillow, it made me think. I just realised why I would ask such a question—her favourite colour.

It was a niggling sensation at the back of my head—something we have all seen but never really observed enough... and I want to smack my head silly because it is something so drastically obvious:

Scarlett can always match her clothes.

“Scar, may I ask you something?” I start again.

She hums in reply, closing her eyes. “Sure, what is it?” she asks me in the usual bored and sleepy tone of hers.

I observe her once more—on the ground as we listen to some Chopin—wearing her usual beige dressing gown which matches the colour of her brown silk pyjamas. The fact that I can always see her in one of two colours ever since I became coloured-eyed just surprises me.

There was not a day Scarlett wore anything mismatched. I had seen the others wear mismatched shirts, coats, waistcoats, trousers, shoes, and even socks—kinda embarrassing really—and it’s all because they’re all greyed-eyed.

Oh my God. Has she already met her soulmate but never told us?

“How do you match your clothes?” I ask.

“Pardon?” she asks, opening her eyes to look at me confusedly. “I don’t think I heard you correctly.”

“I asked you how you matched your clothes.”

She sits up almost immediately at that. “I don’t... Winter, you know, I feel like you’re starting to offend me by rubbing the fact that you’re coloured-eyed to my face. I don’t care about colours or the fact that I’m greyed-eyed. Are we clear on that? When is the attempt to brag ever going to end?”

“I’m not trying to brag!” I exclaim.

“Then, pray tell, what are you doing if not insulting me? Because we both know I will always have greyed-eyed.”

“I’m just trying to ask how—”

“Yes?” she interrupts.

“—how in the world do you manage to always have your clothes matched?” I ask her calmly.

She lies back down on the floor with a sigh, returning to her previous position. “That’s it?”

“Yes.”

“I buy everything in one set of colour every time I shop for clothes. The lady in the shop always guides me with the colours and I trust her judgment. Their matching colours are all in a certain order in my wardrobe so they are all in track to match their colours,” she explains. “Simple, really.”

“In what order are they organised?” I ask sceptically.

“Their chronology,” she answers, “of when I bought them. I even had the colours labelled, thanks to the lady there. With the help of society and information from the internet, I always know which colour to match together, and which colour never to match with.”

I nod to myself. “You do wear red almost all the time though.”

“As people had told me,” she answers plainly. “It is the first set of clothes in the wardrobe that I am able to reach easily. It’s not a surprise I always wear them. Plus, the texture of the clothing is better, and people compliment me on how it looks good on me, and how the colour makes me stand out more. I figured it best to wear them the most.”

Seems fair to me and I actually agree with what she said... but...

“Well... why the effort? Why would you go through all that? Why do you have to match the colours of your clothes? I mean, what’s the point? You can’t even see it...” I regret my words immediately after I said them.

Before I could apologise, however, Scarlett answers, “I may not see it but those who see colours do and I do not want to look moronic in front of them, to be quite honest. Imagine if you would see me in such atrocious colours... People say mismatched clothes could be unappealing,” she continues. “I don’t want people to see me as anything less than I want to exhibit.”

“So, you’re saying... you went through all that trouble for the sake of fashion?”

“Yes,” she answers plainly, “are we done now? I want to nap.”

Right... Maybe I’m wrong.

T W O   Y E A R S   L A T E R

Scarlett has already been told about my new announcement but she still insists on pretending not to know as we gather everyone in our favourite pub.

“So, why are we here?” Sweeney asks. “What’s the occasion?”

“Why would you all think there’s an occasion?” I ask.

“Come on, Winter... You were practically screaming on the phone,” Felicity observes, smiling amusedly.

“And we never come here on a Tuesday,” Lawrence points out. “So what’s the big news that can’t wait until Friday?”

“God, there’s absolutely no secret that can pass by here, is there?” I sigh, laughing. “Guess there’s no point in delaying anything—I’m moving in with Howard,” I announce.

Howard had spent a lot of time with these idiots. They seem to get on pretty well and thankfully, the others love him—which is actually a huge relief to me. Then again, Howard is my soulmate—my other half. Of course, if my friends love me, it’s only natural that my friends would love my other half, too.

Felicity starts shaking in happiness. Lawrence congratulates me with a pat on the shoulder. Sweeney gets the first round. Scarlett just sits there, looking out the window, wearing her signature blood red shirt and blood red scarf—but she said she doesn’t see colours so maybe it’s just her usual clothes and not her signature colour. For me, I’d say it still is.

“God, when’s he proposing?” Lawrence asks. “I think it’s about time, don’t you?” he asks me.

“Really, Law? Marriage? You may be a romantic but I’m not. Let’s focus on moving with him first before all that.” I laugh as they do.

He playfully punches me in the arm. “Come on! You’re moving in with your soulmate! And you’ve been together for about—what?—two years already? Of course, that’s going to lead to a proposal! That’s worth twenty rounds of drinks!”

“I suppose so.” I laugh.

“God, I’d kill for that opportunity. You’re so lucky. What does it look like again? The world in colour?” Felicity asks for the nth time.

“You know that I find it hard to explain. You feel colours. We can’t explain it... You can’t explain the unexplainable,” I say. “Even Science can’t explain this.”

“Fuck Science,” Felicity mocks.

“Feli, you’re a genius architects,” Lawrence points out.

“Fuck Science,” she repeats, laughing. “Speaking of which... Hey, Scar!”

Scarlett hums in answer, turning away from the window. What is she looking at out there anyway?

Oh...

Fireworks...

Colourful fireworks...

“Did you ever wonder what colours look like?” Felicity asks the others.

Just then, Sweeney arrives with the drinks and after being told by Felicity of what we are talking about, starts spewing stories about who he tried to imagine what they look like and ended up with a large headache.

“No,” Scarlett answers simply, dismissing us all by looking out the window again. With Scarlett, you never know what personality she has. She can be sweet, loud, or never talk at all. Her personality is all jumbled.

We all look at Lawrence who shifts uncomfortably on his seat. “I never really thought about it.”

“It must be beautiful,” Felicity moans. “Come on, colours! When will I ever see ya?!” she groans.

“You’ll meet your soulmate, Feli,” Sweeney says. “Too bad it isn’t me.” He winks at her. Felicity laughingly hits Sweeney on the back of his head.

Lawrence clears his throat, looking down at the table as if he is in some sort of trance. “Colours are amazing.” Everyone stares at him and he finally looks up, clearing his throat. “Theoretically, for us greyed-eyed, of course.” He whispers, “They say colours are so beautiful.” He smiles at the table once more.

Then I finally notice that Lawrence is wearing a blood red tie that matches with his brown three-piece suit.

M O M E N T S   L A T E R

"Law, can I ask you something?” I ask Lawrence who had volunteered to drive me back home to Howard.

“Sure, anything.” He smiles briefly before turning his eyes back on the road.

“The colours of your clothes match,” I blurt out before I stop myself.

“That’s... not really a question, Winter,” he points out.

He didn’t deny nor confirm it—which means it’s worth investigating.

“I know... but what I’m asking is: who’s your soulmate? and why didn’t you tell us that you’re already coloured-eyed? and how long?” I ask him.

Lawrence looks at me briefly before sighing. “Swear on your life you won’t tell anyone.”

I nod. “Yes, I promise.”

“Not even Scar,” he points out because I always tell her everything.

“Yes, of course, I promise.”

He nods absentmindedly before smiling. “Well, she doesn’t want to be known. To be honest, I don’t want to expose anything about her either but... obviously, we’ve met. We’re both well aware about us being soulmates and we, er, always meet in secret and that’s when the fun usually begins.” He smiles.

“Do you love each other?”

“Well, if we didn’t, we wouldn’t be married now, would we?”

“WHAT?!” I yell out. “Married? What do you mean married? We haven’t even met her and you’re saying that you’re bloody married?! MARRIED?!”

“In secret, yeah. It was her idea to keep the marriage a secret, and I agree. No one knows about it and we love it that way... but it was my idea to get married. I proposed the usual way—fancy dinner, and with a ring, of course. Still, we always go to fancy restaurants so I didn’t look suspicious... Completely took her by surprise—which is saying something because she doesn’t get surprised easily.” Lawrence laughs.

"How long have you seen colours?" I ask.

"Eight? Nine years?" Lawrence shrugs.

"And how long have you been married?" I ask again.

He smiles. "Seven years."

"Jesus. That long?" I ask and Lawrence nods.

“Honestly, the moment I saw colours, neither of us said anything. I actually thought—no—feared that I was the only one who saw the colours but that was logically impossible... Soulmates are shared bonds so—of course—it had to be her... I remember she was wearing good but mismatched clothes—the look on her face...” He laughs. “I think that was the only time I ever saw her be horrified with herself... but coincidentally, we were wearing the same shirt colour.”

“Does she live with you?”

“No,” he laughs. “That would be hard since Scar lives with me. I’m just glad my soulmate is not the jealous type and she completely trusts me. Scar doesn’t know about her, of course, but our relationship works. My wife and I may be an odd couple but we work—beautifully.”

“You won’t stop talking.” I point out since Lawrence is usually quiet.

“You have no idea how long I’ve always wanted to talk about her. Obviously, I can’t say her name because she’ll kill me if she finds out but, at least, I could say things about her. Granted, I agreed with the secrecy and I love it but... I love her so much, you know? It’s hard not to say anything.” His voice dies down before he whispers, “She humbles me. I’ve always thought I was the smartest person in the room all the time... but then there’s her. I was so different. She made me a better man.”

“You've known your soulmate for a long time; you’re lucky.” I smile.

“Not always—I see you, Felicity, and Sweeney wear hideously coloured clothes all the time. Now, that’s unlucky... although... Scar always wear matched clothes, right? Did you notice that?” he asks me.

“Yeah... yeah, I did.”

“Do you think she met her soulmate? Did she tell you something about it?” he asks me. “She wouldn’t tell me.”

“Well, she told me she didn’t.”

“That’s a load of bull,” he exclaims.

“She says she buys everything in a colour set,” I explain and Lawrence nods, thinking deeply.

“Shame. I was kind of hoping there was something more to that. Imagine Scarlett finding her soulmate? She’d be furious—considering she's not interested about those kinds of things.”

“I don’t know... I still think she’s hiding something,” I add.

“Whatever it is, she will tell us eventually... I hope...” He laughs and I join him because it’s Scarlett. She won’t say shit.

T H R E E   Y E A R S   L A T E R

Tonight, Howard and I cuddle on the sofa as we watch telly when a banging on the door breaks our little Saturday ritual.

My husband stands up to go greet the person on the door. I close the telly and hear some mumbling before a pair of footsteps echoes through the corridor, making its way to the living room.

To my surprise, Scarlett enters. Her clothes are dripping wet from the rain outside—making her body shiver... but that’s not what surprised me.

Scarlett looks lost—scared beyond relief—and she has tears as well as scratches on her eyes.

“I’ll go make a cuppa,” Howard whispers, leaving us.

Scarlett’s legs folds under her and she sits down on the floor before bawling like a child. I don’t know what to do. I’ve never comforted Scarlett before because she never cried in front of me before.

"Scar, what is it?" I try to ask, crouching down in front of her and putting a tentative hand on her shoulder.

Her only answer was a mere moan of pain. My eyes tear up at the sight of our most calculated analytical mind suffering under the maddening curse of being human.

I quickly text everyone to meet up at our house. Howard quietly places the tray with the tea on the table and stands on the side, giving both of us some space.

My attention goes back to Scarlett who whispers one thing, “Can’t...” and she cries out in pain once more.

I try my best to comfort her and Howard actually replaces me for the moment because I’m not really doing a good job with comforting her.

"Oh God, what happened?" Felicity asks when she barges in after being greeted by Howard, crouching down beside me. Sweeney quickly sits beside Scarlett and pulls her into a crushing hug, unlocking more of her emotions and making her cry harder, clutching Sweeney’s jacket tight.

I stand up, pulling Felicity with me, and whisper as to not be heard by Scarlett. "How'd you get here?" I ask Felicity first.

"Sweeney and I were both in the pub when you called," she answers. "God, what do we do?"

"Where's Law?" I ask Felicity. "If anyone knows Scar's limits, it's Lawrence."

"I've been trying to call him; no answer," Felicity whispers, shaking at the sight of a bawling Scarlett. "God, it's hard to see Scar this way. Did she tell you what happened?"

"I don't know." I panic. "She never cries in front of anyone—not to my knowledge, anyway," I say. "One of the two greatest minds in the generation—crying senseless. Fuck, I don’t know what to do. I’m terrible with these kind of things."

We both turn back around when Scarlett suddenly yells out. The three of us are at a dead end. We don't know what to do. Seeing Scarlett cry is new for all of us. We may be the chosen ones for the government's research due to our combined intelligence but we are still at a lost with dealing with human emotions.

"Gone!" Scarlett yells.

"What's gone?" Felicity asks her gently, sitting down on Scarlett's other side..

"Gone," Scarlett whispers, leaning on Sweeney as he cradles her quietly.

"What's gone, Scar?" I ask.

Scarlett whimpers in reply and more tears fall from her eyes.

"It's okay. We've got you," Sweeney whispers, his hand going through Scarlett's hair to comfort her.

We all keep quiet.

Too bad I didn't observe enough. I would have seen Scarlett wearing a black left shoe and a brown right shoe.

M U C H   L A T E R

Lawrence's funeral was held quietly.

Car accident.

"Lawrence Alcott was a good man—the best man," Sweeney says, his voice trembling. "He's my best mate. I still don't—I don't know why this has to happen. I'm an arsehole and I had some words at him too but he stuck by me. He's a really good man and I don't know why this has to—I'm just—I'm really angry at him for—for leaving." Sweeney wipes his tears angrily and doesn't bother to finish his speech and walks away. He and Sweeney were inseparable—except to death, apparently.

Felicity walks in front, "Lawrence is... was a kind man—the most generous person you could ever hope for. With him, I could see colours. I may still be greyed-eyed, but Law here—Law gives out his own colours." Felicity laughs. "He may be the smartest man on Earth but he is also an idiot—our idiot. We love him so much and this is really unfair. Law keeps us all together. He's our glue. We could easily fall apart without him. This is—this is just so hard."

I walk in front, trembling. Felicity and Sweeney smile at me despite both having tears in their eyes. Howard gives me a small encouraging smile—my rock. Scarlett is still stone-faced. She has been quiet all day—all of us, really, but her quietness is too loud, even for me. She had been screaming inside that head of hers and every one of us can hear it.

"Lawrence saved my life countless of times, in many different ways. He's our leader. Now, we're afraid we'd be lost without him. He has been more like a brother to me than a friend, to be honest... and I love him like one would treat family. Bit of a reckless idiot, yes, but he was young—too young and I can't believe I am standing here right now." My voice breaks and I pause. Sniffing, I say what I always tell Lawrence, "Law, you idiot," probably for the last time.

I go back to my seat before I drop there and then and start screaming.

Scarlett walks slowly in front—not a tear or emotion in her eye. Facing Lawrence's coffin, she sighs and turns to stare at everyone. The three of us have been waiting for her speech since she had not said a word since this morning and we all wish to know what she's about to say.

"Of all the ways Lawrence could have died, it had to be a car accident." She laughs humourlessly. "The two of us had talked about it once. He said he wanted to die a tragic but unforgettable death. I knew he was talking about dying in a theatrical manner from a gun shot or something heroic like that—something worth writing in our history books... but who knew that even with something as ordinary as a car crash, he still died tragically in an unforgettable way—guess he still got what he wanted, then."

Scarlett breathes in as she looks at Lawrence's direction again.

"Lawrence is someone I hold very dear to me... and I never say that plainly. He is my first friend—the first person to talk to me. The first thing he told me was, 'If you ever take my job from me, I'll cut you in half.'" Everyone manages to laugh at that. "The last thing he ever told me is something I cannot say for I wish to cherish it for as long as I am living. He's the best person I have ever met and I will always keep him in my heart—and yes, I do have one."

We all look at her, and she smiles at us.

"As you can see from my friends' faces, my words aren't usual. I would never say things like this about anyone, but there is always one exception with every rule. Lawrence will always be my one exception. You'd expect that from me, but I will always think of him as he once said he'd do for me if I ever died before him: Perfectly impossible to exist."

Scarlett insists on digging Lawrence's grave herself.

She doesn't let anyone help her. She practically growled at Sweeney when he tried taking the shovel away from her... but it doesn't matter. Scarlett is a strong woman. She can do this. It is an intimate act—to bury your loved one, and Lawrence was her best friend.

Sweeney, Felicity, and I stand behind Scarlett, looking down at Lawrence's grave as everyone else goes home after the funeral service.

"Everything is grey," she whispers, tears on her cheeks.

"Grey?" Sweeney asks.

Scarlett nods. "Grey," she whispers, gesturing around.

The three of us look at each other, surprised with the revelation.

"He's your soulmate, then?" Felicity asks.

"And husband," Scarlett answers.

"You're married?!" The two shrieks. I give them pointed looks to let Mrs. Scarlett Alcott grieve. I mouth to them that I'll tell the whole story later.

She laughs for a moment. When she stops, she adds, "I'm pregnant, too," with a shaking voice. She whimpers with her words, opening her large coat and placing her hand on a bump where a child is brewing.

"He was so happy..." she cries.

This is all new for us but we don't speak.

She continues almost hysterically with her voice unusually high-pitched, "W-we were going to... to... finally tell you all—about us... about this," she says, gesturing at her eyes. "We were going to surprise you all by... by going to the pub t-together with... with a b-baby in my arms and our wedding bands on. The plan was so perfect."

Her voice breaks at the end and she starts crying again, bending down as if she was punched in the gut as she finally lets go of her bottled up emotions. Sweeney and Felicity are beside her almost immediately, helping her stand up.

She takes something out from her pocket. A gold band wedding ring and a gold ring with a ruby (probably the engagement ring) and places them on her left ring finger.

"At least we finally wore the wedding rings outside the comforts of our isolation at the same time," she whispers weakly. "He's wearing it right now—his own wedding band... My dead husband is wearing his wedding ring."

Scarlett suddenly falls down on her knees and screams out.

Felicity, Sweeney, and I all kneel down with her and hug her.

"Winter..." Scarlett whispers.

"Yes?" I ask.

"Did I bring the right scarf?" she asks me. I look and see her raise her signature blood red scarf. "Is it our... colour?" she asks me.

"Is your colour blood red?" I ask. She winces but nods. "Yes, you—you have the right colour..."

She removes herself from us and moves closer to Lawrence's grave. "Warm up, my love," she whispers, putting the scarf around the grave as if it was Lawrence's neck. "I don't want you to get cold." Scarlett's voice cracks on the last part.

When we all leave, Sweeney decides to drive Scarlett to her and Lawrence's secret family home. Felicity is still shaking as we leave.

Howard has been waiting for me outside the cemetery patiently. I quickly hug my husband, not wanting to let go.

I don't want to see the world in black and white.

Not ever.

To read more: https://www.wattpad.com/story/43551432-soulmate-au

A U T H O R ‘ S   N O T E

Here it is, the first story out of many more I am willing to write. Just tell me what you think and whether I should continue posting my other works...

Oh, and FUN FACT!

“Warm up, my love, I don’t want you to get cold,” are the last words Scarlett heard Lawrence say.

What happened is that: 

Lawrence drove Scarlett to her office because it was raining. She was going to go there to finish some work she needed done by Monday (remember, this is a Saturday). Before Scarlett leaves the car, Lawrence tells her the scarf thing... He died while he was driving back home because it was rainy and some idiot driver decided to be an idiot and crashed him.

...Okay, maybe not a fun fact.

im sorry

[loose-reins]

Dear Followers,

I have been on a long hiatus for many reasons. I faced a few too many adversities in my life: career changes, college stress, struggles with horses, and my mental health was not well (depression). I felt like stepping away from social media was something I really needed to do.

During this time, I was also dealing with a long, annoying cycle of buying and selling horses. Why? Because the horse industry is full of liars. I’m sad to announce that my gorgeous red roan mare, Scarlett, was re-homed due to soundness issues, more specifically, soreness of the navicular bones from improper hoof care in her earlier years. I simply ride too hard to keep her as a personal horse, and living the rest of her life in a smallish pen is beyond unfair, not to mention detrimental to her health. If I had a huge pasture and lots of money, I would have kept her in a heartbeat, and possibly gotten a foal or two out of her (DO NOT lecture me on responsible breeding. I have been in this industry a long time. I know. Trust me). Sadly that is not the case, but I found her a wonderful home where she is well loved and is getting the room & maintenance she needs to stay sound. During the period she was for sale, I picked up 2 older geldings that were being advertised as FREE on Craigslist. This, of course, terrified me and I knew I had to get them before someone else did to dump at auction. One was so old he had almost no teeth left... A good friend of mine is letting him live out his final days in her pasture, and he is being fed mash to stay fat. The other, at 25 years old, I ended up keeping, and I’ve come to discover he is the most awesome trail horse you could ever ask for. But me being me, I still needed a project horse. I ended up picking up a perlino quarter horse mare. What a huge mistake that was. I rushed into buying because I thought she was perfect. The color (which is beyond stupid, I know), her easy going attitude (which was seemed to change overnight...drugged perhaps?), her age... I took her home and the next thing I know the owners are telling me to give her back because she lame. Long story short, because I really don’t want to get into it, the owners scammed me out of $1000. Fucking hate people.

At this point I was done. Defeated. I was ready to give up on finding another horse and just keeping my old gelding as my only mount. But if anyone knows me, they know I just can’t have one horse... I need a project. I need to train. I needed to find my “heart horse.”

This lead to a life changing discovery.

I’ve always been partial to Mustangs. I don’t know why. Maybe because I had seen so many fugly looking ones, or a thought that trying to tame a wild horse was crazy. But let me tell you, the more I watched, the more I learned, the more I educated myself, the more my fellow and well respected equestrian friends swore by them, the more I fell in love with the *breed. (*the name Mustang was a general term given to the feral horses of the Americas, but as time went on and the horses interbred, it is now informally recognized as its own breed.) What is not to love about them? Rock solid hooves, unbelievably smart, easy keepers, available in all shapes in sizes, etc... I soon began to realize that out of those 44,000+ horses waiting for homes in the BLM holding pens, one of them certainly had to be “the one.” The horse I’ve been waiting for.

As fate has it, one of my best friends is a TIP trainer. She promised as soon as she had an opening, we would get a Mustang for myself. It just so happens that one of the horses in her program was ready to go home, just as another well known TIP trainer in the area was holding a Mustang Adoption Event at her storefront (a place certified by the BLM capable of housing wild Mustangs in order to get them adopted). I went, not really thinking I would end up getting one as I planned on making a trip up to the holding corrals within the next few months. But there she was. A stunning bay mare with long gorgeous locks was standing quietly in the storefront pens. Everyone wanted her. She was the talk of the town. I had to have her.

The way it works is that at 8 am, the adoption starts for people who do not want to go through the TIP program and adopt the horses outright, still wild. TIP trainers don’t get to choose until 10 am. Since I was working with a TIP trainer, I had to wait. We literally counted down the minutes, and at exactly 10 o’clock, we signed the paperwork. We got her. #2326 was coming home in our trailer. We started working with her immediately, and already she is making leaps and bounds with her training. She is so smart, calm, and willing to learn. It won’t be much longer until I’m able to take her home. I decided to name her Reina, Spanish for queen, as she is so noble looking and a natural born leader.

I’m so excited yet terrified at the same time to start this journey. I feel adopting a wild horse was exactly what I needed. I’m seeing things in a new light, and, along with my new job riding professionally trained cutting horses, I could not be happier. Unlike last time I started a horse, where I made the mistake of trying to get the horse under saddle as quickly as possible, I will be taking my time with Reina. She will let me know when she ready for the next step.

So it is with great honor I return to this site to document our progress, as well as help others with their own journey of training, whether it be a wild Mustang or a domesticated show horse, I will do my best to stay humble, be honest, and help others achieve their goals.

Reina, our journey is just beginning. I know you have no idea what’s in store for us, and to be quite truthful, neither do I. I guess we’ll figure it out together!

[saergentdaddy-moved-blog]

Summer Camp (Sebastian Stan AU) pt. 1

Summer Camp Masterlist! This story is also on Wattpad!

One | Cheating Girlfriends, RDJ’s Cabin, and Scarlett’s Necklace

If life gave you lemons, you would normally make lemonade. But unlike Sebastian, he threw the lemons into the trash can and bought some apples. Because he was done with his life.

It all started in the morning where it was supposed to be just another day for Sebastian. He thought about jumping into the sea and look for Scarlett's necklace that fell in the water, and then go to RDJ's cabin that was in the other side of the island to have some breakfast if he couldn't find it. Then he'll come back in his room and cuddle with his girlfriend for the rest of the day.

But Maggie wasn't with him in his bed, which was a surprise for him because Sebastian always got up first in the morning. He rubbed his eyes to get rid of the tiredness and sat up on his squeaky bed. "Babe?" he called out. No response. He got up from his bed and walked to the door, opening it. He stuck his head to the doorway.

"Maggie?"

Frantic shushes and incoherent whispers were heard from the corner of the hallway. It came from Room 5, Aaron's room, but Sebastian dismissed it and went back in his room, changing into his clothes for the day. A loose pair of basketball shorts, a shirt, some slippers, and then a towel around his shoulder.

He walked over to Aaron's room and knocked on the door. The whispers came in again, and it suddenly peeked Sebastian's interest. Aaron always had someone with him every night, and he can't stick to one person every night. "Hey, Aaron. It's Sebastian. Wanna go on a swim with me? I gotta look for Scarlett's necklace. She owes me 10 bucks if I find it." Sebastian called out. Aaron didn't respond, but then he replied after a few moments.

"Y-yeah, I'll be—I'll catch up with you in a moment." he replied and then he choked. Sebastian raised an eyebrow, pulling a disgusted face even though Aaron can't see him. "Dude, are you having sex while talking to me?" he asked. Aaron moaned, sounding like he was in pain but in reality, he was really enjoying it.

"N-no! I—mmh, I'm just trying to—"

"You nasty!" Sebastian exclaimed. Aaron choked out another moan. Sebastian gripped the broken doorknob, smirking. "I'm going in."

"No! Wait—!"

He opened the door and stopped in his tracks. Aaron was hovering over a girl, but it just wasn't any girl.

Maggie was underneath him.

"M-Maggie?"

Maggie frantically pushed Aaron off her and quickly put on his blanket over her naked body. "Seb, I can explain—"

"No!" Sebastian yelled in shock, in disbelief, and in anger. "You—you fucked my best friend! You're still fucking him! I—"

"Seb, this is a misunderstanding—"

"Oh, so fucking Aaron is just a simple misunderstanding?! What kind of an idiot would believe that kind of crap nowadays?!" he yelled at her.

He couldn't remember what happened after that, because he walked out of Aaron's room and fled to the sea, where he hoped he'll calm down.

It calmed him down by a 20%, but he wasn't swimming in the ocean. He was sitting on the sand and listening to the waves crashing to the shore.

He couldn't believe it. Maggie, becoming a cheater, it was so unlikely​ of her. Maggie was the nicest person Sebastian has ever met, and she goes cheating on him? Unbelievable.

"Hey,"

Sebastian looked up and saw Chris and Anthony looking down at him with pity across their faces. Sebastian tapped the free space on each side of his seat and they sat down beside him. "And here I thought I had a rough break-up with Jenny." Chris joked lightly. Sebastian sighed and hid his face in his hands. "God, it's so—it's not likely of Maggie to cheat on me. She's so nice to everybody, and then she pulls this kind of shit on me? This is ridiculous."

Anthony patted him on the back as an ineffective way of comforting him "Sometimes, the silent and the kind can be deadly." he told him. Sebastian looked down at the sand in dismay. "What am I gonna do? She'll be competeing with me this summer camp. I can't give my team justice if she's up there strutting around like she owns the place and distracting me. It won't be fair for my part." Sebastian said. Chris hummed, thinking. "I'll tell Robert on what he can do. Maggie is planning on taking a break from being team counselor, anyway." he said. "We'll find you a team counselor in no time." Anthony said to Sebastian, reassuring him.

Sebastian didn't feel quite reassured.

×××

Sebastian rowed the boat to the where he suspected the necklace had ended up in. The water was clear, like it always has, but he can't see clearly due to the waves. He looked around for a silver glint in the water. When he found nothing, he put on his goggles and jumped into the water, swimming to reach the sea floor. It wasn't very deep, since he was just 30 feet away from the shore.

He held a coral to keep him from floating back up and sweeped his eyes around for Scarlett's necklace. He continued grabbing for corals and crawling around, turning his head for the piece of jewelry.

But Sebastian didn't know that someone had jumped into the water, too. He bumped his head against someone else's head. He recoiled and glared at the person; the person returned the glare. They both resurfaced and they both gasped for air.

"Who the fuck are you?" Sebastian asked.

"Who the fuck are you?" she replied back.

Sebastian looked at her in disbelief. He hadn't seen her around Camp Sundance before since he moved in with Anthony last year. Her startling blue eyes seemed to stare at his very soul, like she can see his secrets so easily. (alexandra's eyes scare me so much tbh) It made Sebastian shiver.

He swam to his boat and climbed up. The girl followed him, and he helped her up the boat, almost tumbling them over. They shared a dubious silence.

"Okay, let me ask you first. Who are you?" Sebastian asked. "Cherry," she replied. Sebastian pulled an amused face. "Cherry? As in like the fruit?" he asked. The name Cherry sounded too cute for a girl that looked like a silent soul-reaper. Cherry raised an eyebrow at him, looking impressed. "Do you think my name is unfit for me?" she asked. She sounded like she needed an honest answer and that she wouldn't be angry about it.

"You look like you could be a Summer or an Annabeth." Sebastian replied. (see what i did there??) "You know, just a simple name." he said. Cherry smiled. "Thank god someone agrees with me. I hate my name. It sounds so boring." she said. Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Oh, come on, your name sounds cool. It's an uncommon name." he told her. Cherry scoffed. "Yeah right. What were you doing under the water?"

Cherry changed the subject; Sebastian didn't mind. "I was looking for my friend's necklace. She promised she'll give me 10 bucks if I found it. You?" Cherry shrugged, like it was no big deal. "Just looking for some weird shit under the water." she replied. "I did found this, though." She dug into her shirt pocket and revealed a silver necklace with a small gold heart as its little decoration. It was Scarlett's necklace. "It might be your friend's." she said and handed it over to Sebastian. He stared at it with excitement. Scarlett totally owes him 10 bucks. "Yeah, this is my friend's. Thanks." he said and put it in his shirt pocket.

"How about we go to RDJ's cabin and have some breakfast?" Sebastian asked as he began rowing the boat to RDJ's cabin, since the first task he set up for himself was done. Cherry shook he head. "No thanks, I already ate back at Chris's. Though it'd be nice to see Robert's cabin." she said. "You know Chris?" he asked her, getting the puzzle pieces together on why Cherry was in Camp Sundance in the first place. Cherry shrugged again.

"Yeah. I'm best friends with his brother, Scott. He likes having me around, saying I'm a good influence for Scott or something. Whatever that big-tit buffalo giant says." she said. Sebastian laughed. "Chris has really big tits, huh?"

"I like to squeeze 'em sometimes." she said. Sebastian nodded in agreement, because he squeezes Chris's breasts, too. "They're bigger than my boobs. Jesus Christ, this conversation is going nowhere." she joked, and Sebastian laughed. They sat in comfortable silence, hearing the waves faintly crash to the shore and the seagulls flap their wings and make annoying squawks. Sebastian rowed until they reached Robert's cabin. Sebastian got off first and helped Cherry get off the boat. They walked up to the stairs. "I didn't catch your name." Cherry acknowledged. "I didn't throw it," Sebastian replied and knocked on the door. Cherry shoved him, making Sebastian laugh. "Okay, okay, sorry! I'm Sebastian." he said. Cherry snorted. "Under the sea . . ." Cherry sang under her breath. Sebastian glared at her. "Come on, I didn't make fun of your name! I even called it cool!" he exclaimed. Cherry laughed. "Sorry, sorry." she said.

The door opened, revealing Chris behind it. "Hey there, you two. Didn't think you'd be meeting each other so soon." Chris said. They both shrugged. "Fate, probably." Cherry said and walked into the cabin. Sebastian entered the cabin. "Where's Scarlett? I found her necklace." he said and grabbed the necklace from his pocket. Chris pointed to the bar where Scarlett and Lizzie were having a chat. "Okay, thanks." Sebastian said and walked over to the ladies.

"Hey, Scarlett. Found your necklace." he said smugly to Scarlett and he put the necklace on the bar. Scarlett gasped excitedly and grabbed the necklace, examining it. "Oh, my god! Thank you, Seb!" she exclaimed. Sebastian held out his arms, acting as if it was nothing. "Sebastian Stan, greatest man in history." he boasted. Scarlett and Lizzie rolled her eyes. "Don't flatter yourself, Stan. You could drown in your cockiness." Lizzie replied. Sebastian stuck his tongue out at her.

Scarlett gave Sebastian 10 dollars, as she has promised, and he walked away with triumph in his face.