#then i should include some stuff about my special interest. to make it a learning experience or something

[1smolbean]

if one more major historical event happens before the end of summer i am going to walk into the SEA and go to a CORAL REEF where i can hang out with the 25% of MARINE FISH SPECIES who live there despite coral reefs making up roughly 1% of the surface area of all oceans. then i am going to a KELP FOREST where i will observe tje SEA OTTERS using kelp to secure their young while the parents go diving for food including SEA URCHINS which are actively destroying kelp forests. i will then descend into the depths of the pacific ocean and befriend the various CRUSTACEANS and diverse types of DEEP SEA FISH, including but not limited to, COOKIECUTTER SHARKS, LANTERNFISH, and many kinds of EELS. also i will be locating a whale fall and joining the complex ecosystem that forms when a whale carcass falls to the sea floor, where sea creatures gather to feast on various parts of its corpse

[livingsurreal]

More thoughts and theories about our favorite Necromancer

My darlings, I have too many thoughts and my obsession is running wild. (How I missed you, hyperfocus). If you have read my last meta post about our Emmrich, here it is: First Meta Post

That is not a required read however. I am still wondering why anyone is reading my word vomit U_U

Anyway, I love reading other peoples theories, so please, send me yours. <3 And a lot of thanks and love for all you darlings who make this fandom such a beautiful and nice place. Especially to @jaal-ama-daravv - who makes the most beautiful videos, and writes such wonderful character studies.

Warning, from here on there will be spoilers as well as mentions of sex. If you don't want to read about any of that, do not read the rest.

Also pictures and way too many words. This is a ten page word document, save yourself while you can. I tend to go off on a tangent once I start writing. I am also well aware that not everyone will agree. This is just my personal read on Emmrich.

Now, after my first essay I have some more thoughts on Emmrich and Rook and specifically their intimate relationship.

Emmrich is such an interesting and baffling contradiction. On the one hand he is confident, self-assured, all manners and poise. He is smart, and he knows it. He has special gifts, and he knows it.  He is confident without being proud. He likes to teach others without being arrogant. He still likes to learn about new things and is, as far as I’ve seen, never judgmental about different beliefs and ways of life. (Unless someone treats him with disdain or bully him)

He is a man who is confident speaking of his thoughts and feelings and fears. How he just casually drops his thanatophobia is just astonishing. He is honest and open-minded in the best ways.

And then there is the other side of him. The wet kitten side of him. As open and honest as he is about his emotions, when we get to the meat of it, to the scary bit, the real feely bit, he locks up completely. As long as it is surface level (or he can pretend its surface level), everything is up for discussion. But once we reach deeper and touch *love* he gets so scared and refuses to admit and commit to his feelings. And as much *death* scares him, love scares him more.

So how does that influence his intimate relationship with Rook?

According to the banter with Lace “everyone knows about it”. He was rather surprised by that.

That tells us two things:

They were trying to be sneaky or at least keep their private business private.

They failed, massively.

Add to that Laces comment about them moving rather fast (when, where? I would have loved to have seen that. Comments like that just give me the feeling that we should have had some more cutscenes after the dinner date, to show us those two besotted fools).

But back to them moving rather fast. I would guess that they both did a lot of gazing lovingly at each other, blushing, spacing out while watching their darling, stollen kisses in the hallway when they thought no one was watching, stuff like that. Just being to besotted fools.

But moving fast usually includes sex. Lots of needy, sweaty sex. The inability to keep their hands of each other.

That moves us to the question of the day – did they have sex before their coffin time?

Let’s look at what we know about Emmrich. Emmrich is no virgin. That man has experience. He had past lovers. But what he tells us at that sweet diner date – “nothing serious for years.” We know not much else besides his crush on a boy in his youth and his fling with the Orlesian Art Lady. He is not someone to kiss and tell and that is appreciated. That man has class, and we love him for it.

So - nothing SERIOUS for years. If he hadn’t had ANY relationships in the past years, he would have said so. But what he says is that he did, in fact, have UNSERIOUS relationships in the last few years.

I would read that to be somewhere along the “fwb, lovers, affairs, paramours, companions, a fling, a little romance” line. Something not purely, but mainly physically driven. Someone you like and respect, you can go out and have a good time with, have lots of amazing sex with (b/c he is a living being and has his needs). Spending time with people he liked, was sexually attracted too, but nothing as serious as love. A physical relationship. A little thrill, some fluttering, but never that deep.

Not to say that those situationships would not have been romantic. He is (buried under all that resignation) a deeply romantic man. I am pretty sure he went on nice romantic dates with his previous paramours too. That this is something he just enjoys too much. Treating a companion with some quality time, not just in, but also out of the bedroom.

But after he’d given up on his dreams, he did not have any notion of those flings being more than a “enjoy the moment”. There was never the expectation of deeper feelings, beyond friendship, attraction and/or respect. All those romantic gestures were nothing more than a little bit of “play pretend”. To give himself the illusion of true romance, just for a little time.

Take the fact that you can go a “everything you do is creepy but I still flirt with you and I want you to throw me over that tombstone” and his comment on “the attraction of the forbidden”? This is not a relationship born of mutual respect and deeper feelings but out of purely physical attraction. And he is OK with that.

I want to repeat – Emmrich is very much okay with a casual, sexual affair. He does not require love to have a relationship with someone.

And then think about that Johanna calls Rook specifically his “paramour”. Which is a lover, especially an illicit one. This word was very specifically chosen by Johanna. For various reasons, I would think.

For one, I do believe that it is a dig at his dreams of the eternal flame. It’s a dig at him, that Rook is not his love, but his paramour. A lover for a time. To be parted from soon enough. B/c that silly dream of his, as if it ever would become reality.

Second, I think it is a comment on the way his relationships often went, especially in the past years. Those unserious flings of his. Never to amount to anything substantial.

Did he try to have something serious in the past? Oh yes, for sure. But it never worked out. Then he gave up his dream and just let himself have a good time with people he found to be nice and attractive.

To pick up my point of self-sabotage from my last meta post – I’ve come to a point where I believe Emmrich is a kind of chaser. I know someone like that and it’s so fucking tragic.

Emmrich feels deeply and strongly. When he falls in love with someone it’s a lot of emotion. But at that point it’s all dream, want, wish. As soon as someone returns these feelings - those dreams, wants and wishes become reality. And reality is scary. In this wishful dream about the eternal flame, there is no fear. No fights. No loss. But that is not reality. As soon as it becomes reality, he gets scared. Before, his feelings were no threat, because you can’t lose what you don’t have. Once those feelings are returned, there is a clear possibility of losing, of being lost, of being left behind.

Emmrich is not a chaser because he enjoys the hunt. He is a chaser because being loved by someone is scary. So damn scary. So, he starts to pick fights and is looking for excuses. From being the chaser, he becomes the chased. He is hunted by his fears, and his fight or flight instincts go all flight.

After years of this cycle he gives up. Resigns himself to flings and little romances without even thinking of more. Or so he thinks. Dreams like that don’t die, they just get buried.

And I’d think that there was not many, even of those short term flings, lately. His life revolves around work and Manfred.

Now remember he comments on Rook “showing unexpected interest in a new companion”.

First of all – unexpected.

They are a daring adventurer. He thinks of himself clearly as the more boring one, compared to Rook. He never expected any of those flirts. But he is clearly flattered.

Second – companion.

That was such a weird way of saying “hey do you like me?”. This whole “companion” thing does not scream “I have FEELZ for you/you have FEELZ for me” but rather, “I think you might want to spend some quality time with me”.

The possible answers - dashing good looks, kindness, his way of words.

He feels he is fortunate if Rook thinks him good looking. Hallo, Mr. Professor, sir… Have you looked in the mirror lately? Consider that he is meticulously grooming himself, takes his exercises daily in the morning. That man does not like himself aging. I think it is a reminder of how his pending death is a step closer every day. But it shows, to him, that his efforts of taking care of himself are not in vain. Or maybe it shows him that his age does not matter. Rook finds him attractive despite (or because) of his physical age.

Rooks comment on his very charming way of putting things makes him hope his years behind the lectern have proved useful. Hey *years* behind the lectern. Again, this is a way of saying his age is NOT a problem but a benefit.

If Rook remarks his kindness, he answers “you humble me”. It’s the one answer that does not touch his age/experience/looks. It’s a remark on an innate character trait he possesses. Kindness. His whole demeanor in this option shows he is actually touched. And maybe a bit baffled. He did not expect this, at all. Its like he sees his kindness not as an attractive trait. Which he should. He is nice without TM and its sexy as hell.

The next part is his statement “If your attentions go beyond charming flattery… that would interest me, indeed”. This reads to me not necessarily as “do you have feelings for me” but as “do you just enjoy the flirting, or do you want to do more than flirting?”

And oh boy, does he want to do more than flirting. I want to repeat my earlier statement – this man has given up on love. But some little fling with an exiting young adventure who was constantly, awkwardly flirting with him? Hell, yeah.

(I want to remind you that we were able to have mutually enjoyed flirts with Dorian as fem!Inky. You can flirt with someone and still never want to fuck them. And you are also perfectly able to want more than flirting without having deeper feelings. Like sweet, dump Shepaloo said it so eloquently “Lets bang, okay?”)

Again, I want to pick up a point of my last post, that this is all surface level thoughts. I do believe that their emotional attraction and depth of feelings go deeper, from the start. But how often does it take quite a bit of time to realize one’s own feelings. Especially this wonderful, silly man whose modus operandi is running away.

Now, an interested Rook can answer in an open “lets see where this goes” way. Mirroring his rather open idea of a little romance, a fling, some quality time. Something that does not have to end in an eternal flame, but a simple enjoyment and exploration of the moment.

Rook can also reply with a “I think they do.” – What Rook actually says is “I think they already…”

And conveniently Rooks answer here is cut short by our sweet boy Manfred. They get cut short, no matter what answer you choose, but in this specific case, I am convinced this was very much on purpose. What would the whole sentence have been?

“I think they already go way beyond flattery.” (?!?) Something along those lines. But that goes into danger zone. WAY into danger zone.

If Rook had finished that sentence, at that point in their budding romance? It would have been over before is all started. Too much, too soon. Too much for him, period.

Now we have the hard lock – their sweet romantic moment in the Memorial Gardens. And he is smitten. He fell hook, line, and sinker for his own play pretend. Just a little romance, but that man is falling, fast. (Not that he would admit that to himself).

A beautiful date, all arranged by Emmrich, to spend time with Rook. Because a couple should have a quite moment to get to know each other. I mean there were menu cards with gilded edges, ffs. And, oh yes, they were “lets dig into the feelings”, he said couple. He is falling, falling, falling fast. But it still hasn’t hit him, how deep he has fallen for his darling Rook. Poor Emmrich.

Then a fight, where we really see the wet kitten side of him for the first time. A little wet, feral kitten, hissing at the hand that’s trying to feed it.

Emmrich is lashing out for no good reason (or no good reason for anyone but himself). There is no real confidence there but a desperate act of pretending. An iron (slipping) grip, trying to control himself and the narrative. Shoulders squared, back straight, an arrogant stance, raised chin, turned half-away from Rook, and a condescending way of talking to Rook.

Like I said in my last post – he is working his way up to breaking up with them. And he tells himself it’s like ripping off a bandaid. Be strong and confident and say what you have to say, and they will see the wisdom of that.

It’s only that, they don’t. Because there IS NO wisdom in what he is doing right now. They don’t take his bullshit but throw it back at him. They don’t accept his mock excuses.

Look at him here, how he looks down ON them. I can’t recall any other time he looks down on Rook, despite him being a tall king.

Especially the route where Rook throws it in his face that he DOES in fact love them. Speak what he can’t even think.

“I can’t… At my…”

“I can’t love you. At my age…” Why not? Does he not deserve love, just because he is a bit older? It’s just heartbreaking how he views himself.

And again, he lashes out.

“I am perfectly serious.” So is Rook.

“One of us has to pay attention to these things.” As if Rook is not paying attention. They got to the meat and bones of his problem in just a few seconds.

No matter what route you go here, the gist is the same. He is scared shitless, treats Rook like a child, and goes on how the is the only one thinking the important thoughts.

When Rook in reality way ahead of him. They thought about it and came to the conclusion that being with Emmrich is a really good idea.

Rook knew they were falling for someone older than them. (Even if that age difference is just a decade, with a mid-40s Rook.) They knew it, and still went with it. They are not a child who is too inexperienced and stupid to make decisions about their (love) life.

But now, here, at this moment? Emmrich treats them with disdain. Like a silly little person, who does not think things through. He holds himself above them. Physically and mentally. They are too young, he knows better.

And not once has he done that before. He always treated them as an equal. He follows them into the most dangerous situations ffs. He trusts them with his life in a fight against would-be gods.

All that fear and anger at himself that reaches a new high get redirected at Rook.

The next day they are off to Tearstone Island. That night must have been hell. For both of them. But its going to get much much worse.

In any case, Emmrich seems to have come to some conclusion or realization, because on that island? He apologizes.

They both did react very emotionally, but he came at Rook with superiority and, to a certain degree, dishonesty. All fueled by his fear. So that he is the one to take the first step and apologize to Rook instead of doubling down? An important step. As I said in my last post – he NEEDED to be called out. A sweet and nice counterargument would not have had the impact Rooks raw an honest emotion hat on him.

Emmrich “Rook? Darling? I wanted to say-“

Rook “Yeah, about that argument…”

Emmrich “(Sighs) It’s no time to apologize, is it?”

And here we have the most heartbreaking line, in hindsight. “We’ll talk back home, Emmrich. I promise.”

(Narrator: but they would, in fact, not talk about it back home. Because someone would not go home.)

One fight and weeks of horror later, they find themselves in a private crypt and finally they do more than share a kiss.

Now - to the point I originally wanted to explore with this post – is this in fact their first time? (I am sorry, but my brain is a circle and nothing makes sense)

Let’s look at what evidence we have from the cut-scene.

Rook did not know he is an early riser.

That leaves two possibilities:

They never had sex up until that point.

They did have sex, but never spent the night together.

Now what does that mean?

This depends a lot on your personal Rook and how they feel about sex in general. If Rook wants to wait, or is not ready, he will absolutely accept and respect that.

But for the sake of this analysis lets go with the idea that Rook is not opposed to sex at an earlier date.

They never slept with each other

Why? He clearly was not opposed to casual relationships in the past. What would hold him back now? Especially if you recall Laces comment about them moving fast. Why not jump into the bedroom?

Now my first crack theory is that they get interrupted, like every time. (Rook interrupted The Dread Wolf, and now he cursed them to always be interrupted when they want to have some private time)

But now, in all seriousness, maybe it’s just that part of him DOES realize that this goes beyond a very unserious relationship. That they both have deeper feelings, that spark of something greater, something beautiful.

So, he holds back. He does not give his all. He is charming, he is flirty, he takes Rook on dates. But it’s all very technical. Very performative. Yes, he is a very romantic man, yes he enjoys those moments. But there is always a feeling of control.

Those moments when you see him let go a bit (that kiss beneath the eternal lovers, “I think, sometimes you indulge me”), are so beautiful and you glimpse a bit of the man behind those walls.

He has a tell, you see. (I am telling you about it further down)

But generally, he feels very much in control of himself. And to lie with Rook? To go all the way? Too dangerous. Who knows what happens in that sweet moment after la petit mort? What secrets would his lips spill?

2. They slept together, but did not spent the night together.

They do have sex, but sleep alone in their own beds. Casual sex is fine, but to fall asleep in each other’s arms? Too much. Too real. Sex okay, but sleepy post coitus cuddly? Woah, slow down your horses.

So, they have sex, preferably in Rooks bed. First, does he even have a bed? Second, it’s way easier to leave Rooks bed after the act, than throwing them out afterwards.

Oh, and how many reasons he has. Rook needs their uninterrupted sleep; they are stressed and must have proper rest. He wants to get some reading done before he retires. He needs to look after Manfred.

Oh, he is a bad liar, for sure. He is lying more to himself than to Rook. I would think that (if this is the build up to their fight) Rook realizes that he is giving poor excuses.

And the sex itself? A technical 10/10. He knows his anatomy, after all. But his heart is not really in it. He can’t allow himself to. He holds back, keeps a tight lid on his emotions. They both are well spent afterwards, but like so much else, it’s performative. Technically very well executed, but rarely do you see HIM, the real him, behind all that performance. Whenever something slips through, he reels back and closes up.

And then we are in that crypt. Rook was gone for weeks. The last thing they said that night before were words of anger. Rook called him out on his feelings and from that point on there was no possible way of lying to himself anymore. Those feelings were there. They were real. Rooks feelings were real. And those weeks spent in desperation, trying to  get them back? Those walls came crashing down.

His true face, when all the walls are gone? You see that face when Rook leads him to the coffin. There is no pretense anymore. No performance. Just him, and all his love for Rook. The amount of emotion the animation team packed into those short moments in the cutscene? Mindblowing. Who ever crafted that expression on his face? They are the GOAT. I watch this part of that scene on repeat, and it never gets old.

So, I told you about how he has a tell, yes? Okay, two actually, but we all know surprised pikachu Emmrich. In that last scene it is resolved in the most beautiful way.

He looks down, when something touches him deeply, when he goes into his feels.

A few (way to many) examples:

And the worst wet kitten look? After the fight, when Rook leaves.

Its a look of shame. Of hurt. This man is hurting so badly.

Now here at the end we have that moment when Rook leads him to the coffin. His face turns down, like before. But here he looks up at Rook. He does not turn his eyes away but looks directly at them. Ahhh my heart.

Now, think about the fact that ROOK is leading in that moment?

In those moments where Rook leads or startles him (or is simply annoying enough so that the truth slips out), you see the most emotion from him.

Rooks flirting startles him, and he has a pikachu face reaction every time.

Their first kiss? Rook leans against the monument, and leans up, telling him without words that NOW is the time for a kiss. How can he not go for a second kiss?

That moment when Rook calls Manfred “our son”? He very conveniently ignores the word “OUR” and goes in defense mode over the word “son”. But called out on his feelings for Manfred? How can he deny them? He has tears in his voice when he says how he would not exchange this moment for anything? A real, deep emotion.

In their fight Emmrich is again all technical, all performance, so logical (or what he sells himself as logic). But Rook wrestles that moment from him and takes lead, calls him out on his bullshit.

In the crypt Rook pulls him up into a kiss and then leads him to the coffin, guiding him, taking him with them.

Most of the other times he takes the lead, very much in control. But the most emotions you get from him, are those times Rooks leads, when he lets go of this tight control over himself, or he is startled in to a reaction. For all the age difference that is played up in their relationship, in the important moments Rook is the one who guides. And he follows where they lead.

Those little moans he makes? If they did have sex before, I bet he did not make those sounds then. Where they did have some incredible sex, now they are making love. Open, vulnerable. He gives in.

And then they fall asleep together. Skin to skin, arms and legs intertwined. Their hands caressing, no sound but that of their heartbeats and soft breaths. Pure and utter contentment. In that moment nothing exists but them. Can you imagine that moment he woke up? The amount of emotions he must have felt then? This need to speak those little words? Those huge little words. He does not say them, not yet. But he is almost ready.  

Finally, they stand there, on the battlefield of Elgar’nans madness. And he tells Rook. The last wall falls. Gives the most precious thing he can give to anyone.

“I love you.”

[thatnonameuser]

A Wonderland Of Yanderes

World Building is here Part 2

It all started with that class.

The final class for the first week of the first semester. After all the chaos of coming to Twisted Wonderland, of being thrown into a world you don’t understand, a quiet weekend to start finding a way back is something you’ve been awaiting.

The classes here were chaotic but fun, and even interesting as a human from a world without any magic. 

Making potions that could do so many different things in Alchemy. Speaking with animals or a cat that can't talk like Grim in Animal Languages. Riding broomsticks in Phys Ed. Even the boring classes like Magical History, learning of this world full of wonder and mystery, and Arithmancy, math was boring, but it was fun to learn that it’s the same in this world. 

But out of all the classes this was the weirdest one of all. 

It was called The Art of Ensnaring Hearts. About ‘darling control and protection’. It’s a weird sounding class, but even weirder, it’s a mandatory subject for all first years, which seems weird for what sounds like an elective. Still it’s just odd, not anything too weird.

The name is nothing that you’ve seen in any fantasy book or tv show in your world. But by now, you knew weird being dropped head first into an unknown world. By now anything new and weird should have been expected, understood, brushed aside as something to accept and move on.

So here you were sitting between Ace and Deuce in the lecture, Grim fast asleep on your lap, waiting for class you knew nothing about.

“I can’t believe they’re making us take this class.” Ace complains.

“Stop complaining Ace. It’s a really important class!” Deuce objects.

Ace whined his butt off the whole way here, complaining about how stupid it was that they had to attend it. Deuce on the other hand, was incredibly enthusiastic and you are completely in the dark for what this class is even about.

Ace shrugs, “Still, my folks and brother taught me all about this stuff. It’s a waste of time.”

“Not everyone has parents or siblings who can teach them about darlings, Ace.”

“Nothing personal Juice, but this class is going to be as boring as Magical History.”

“Well, if you know so much, what exactly is this class about?” You joke and they both look at you like you’ve grown a second head. "What?" you say, now uneasy.

 “You don’t know?” Ace asks.

“What part about ‘I’m from another world’ keeps slipping your minds?” Your attempt at a joke falls flat, as they look at you in incredulity.

Deuce practically reels back in surprise, “N-No it’s just that it's so normal here. You don’t know what darlings are?”

You shake your head, “No, not really.”

A crack of a whip onto the blackboard calls your attention to Professor Crewel, "Alright pups, I have to do this every year so let's get this out of the way now. This class will provide you with any and every method, skill and technique to find, capture and control your future darlings, including evading the law in your respective homelands." Now, you're confused, why exactly is a school teaching students how to break the law?

"As you know Sage Island makes special accommodations for NRC and RSA students, all acts that may be forbidden in any of your hometowns, with the exception of Darling murder, will be pardoned and forgiven. In the case of a family investigation, the school will stage an accident so please do not butcher them beyond repair." No words or sounds slip from your lips, with you stunned silent in pure horror.

What pools in your stomach is hot dread mixed with cold fear. Just what exactly is this world? Murder can be excused here? It can be covered up, with only a slap on the wrist. You need some explanations and you need them now.

A student raises a hand, "Professor?"

"Yes, pup?"

"Why are there no darlings enrolled in Night Raven?"

"One too many murders on campus. A few too many mutts ran around unneutered and decided to draw blood." You smother your gasp a few seconds too late, as more than a third of the room turn to you, confused.

"Something wrong, pup?" Crewel raises an eyebrow at you. His eyes drill into your soul, inspecting, calculating.

"N-Nothing! I'm fine. Perfectly fine." Crewel doesn't push you on the subject, returning to his lecture.

You lean back in your seat, and the cold sweat on your body makes you shiver. Right now, you'll bite your tongue and hold back your horror.

You need to see Crowley, as soon as possible.

[ask-the-rag-dolly]

Genuine question, how does one deal with someone being so insistent on their lack of (self-)worth? Not to vent too much, but I grew up with someone who was at least as bad, if not worse than Ragatha. I developed similar habits (this comic is a painful reminder of that) and my friends also tend to struggle with these feelings. But I never know how to deal with these issues, and it just leaves me feeling helpless.

I believe you‘re not a psychologist and it‘s fine if you don‘t want to answer this. But if you do have some advice or resources on this topic, I‘d love to know about it.

hi !

you're right , i am Not a psychologist ! my only credential is pretty much having it as my special interest of many years , so ... ! obligatory ' take this with a grain of salt ' disclaimer

i'm only answering this ask because i do like talking about these kinds of stuff ( in fact i'm in the middle of writing another psychology infographic with ragatha because of Course i am , ) and it's Relevant right now ... but for the most part i am literally just a stranger on the internet and thus i'll only be giving out general advice !! any specifics of the situation are stuff you'll need to figure out yourself

number one thing is that you should Always Take Care Of Yourself . it may be hard to admit , but these types of people can actually be Emotionally Draining - and i'm saying that as someone who had to deal with those people myself . and well you don't want to accidentally say things that make them feel worse

second thing is that a lot of it is ... really the other person's effort . all you can do is be supportive and gently encourage them . what took me so long to accept is that no amount of words or compliments will lift someone's self-esteem up - while it helps , it really has to come from Within , and that's something that'll take months or Years to build up . you can't force someone to start loving themself - and that's a hard pill to swallow

and the third thing is that ... well . there's a possibility that it could be a symptom of a mental disorder and thus you should encourage them to seek professional help . i am aware that the option is not available for everyone though , but i think recognizing that it might be a mental problem might take the burden off of you a little - as they're not really things a non-professional should handle .

as for resources , this article was extensive about this topic , including recognizing where the low self-esteem comes from , what Not to say to someone with low self-esteem , and tips that'll help the person ! very wonderful to read .

this article is for partners but i think it applies to people you're close with in general . what i like about it is how it Encourages open communication and listening . something you'll realize is that it's Different for everybody and it's good to learn more about the problem than jumping to a hasty solution or making assumptions . also it encourages them to talk more about their Feelings and talking about your feelings is what Very Cool And Hot People Do !

oh God sorry for the long post this should be enough to give me a diagnosis -

[rathayibacter]

been thinking about the parallels between ttrpgs and poetry lately, synthesizing some stuff i've been sitting on with both. i don't remember where i heard this from, but i really like the idea of defining poetry as writing that can't be edited down any more; if you made even one cut, one word replacement, you'd lose something. even the repetitions and redundancies are there to communicate something, because if they weren't they'd be removed. 

its not true, of course, but i don't think it has to be. as a lens to examine poetry i think it's fun, and as a goal when writing poetry it's helped me on more than one occasion. any claim to Fundamental Truth beyond that line doesn't matter much in my opinion. what i like about this isn't that it makes for poetry where you have to read a certain meaning out of every single line to "get it", its actually kinda the opposite! by assuming there's meaning baked into every detail, you can get meaning out of any detail you decide to focus on, and can narrow your focus as much or as little as you like. my favorite poetry is messy, colorful, and dense; you're not gonna get a single clean reading out of it because doing that requires ignoring all the fun little twists and turns, all the intersecting ideas that led it to this point.

and so that brings us to ttrpgs! role-playing games are a fascinating thing because they can really only get us halfway; even the most strict and detailed game has an innate fuzziness that comes from the peculiarities of how we play tabletop games. your mechanics are only airtight if everyone knows, understands, and remembers them, and those are three tall orders for any game, no matter how simple or intuitive it may present as. and that's not even a bad thing! interpretation isn't just "what percentage of the rules are the players getting wrong", its an adaptation of the rules as written to the game as played. even forgotten rules are part of this, cuz anything that's able to be forgotten (and again, that's potentially anything) probably was forgotten cuz it wasn't terribly relevant to the table forgetting it. 

so, as we write games and cast them into the world, fully aware that the thing that'll arrive at people's tables will never match what we had in our heads, what should we do? obviously some of this is just practical; don't bog players down with unnecessary busywork or minute exceptions to memorize, don't build a house of cards that stops working if any one part is missing or changed, you can use stuff like cheat sheets, examples of play, indexes, and asides to make it easier to learn, reference, and remember how to play.

but i promised you poetry, and poetry we shall have! so here's my big guiding principle for writing ttrpgs: only include it if it sings. every part of the game should be special, so that no matter what part or parts of the game a particular table winds up using, the game still shines through. by tangling the spirit of the game up in every line, every rule, every tiny little piece, everyone who engages with it can get tangled up in it too, and can fill in the spaces between in whatever way resonates most with them.

in more practical terms, this is "don't write anything that's less interesting than what the players will make up at the table", ie assume players will fill any missing spaces to the table's preferences, so only close those gaps if you've got something fun to say. don't fill space out of obligation, don't bog yourself down in the stuff that doesn't matter. this doesn't mean never add a polearms list because there's a million polearms lists out there already, but it does mean don't add a polearms list unless you're burning with passion to add it, and excited for people to share in that passion. if you don't, don't worry about it. they can figure it out. the table can always replace your good ideas with ones they like more, and they can always fill in the gaps when they come up, but it's not always easy to recover from a wall of bland filler or an ocean of lifeless cliches.

i wont tell you that if you follow this One Weird Trick then your game will be good. i don't know what a good game is. or rather, i know exactly what i think a good game is, and have no idea what you think it is, and have less than no faith that anyone could ever determine what a Truly Good Game is. but just like the quippy little definition of poetry at the top, universal truth isn't really what i'm after when i employ this. i'm trying to make something that satisfies the little itch in my brain, that sings to me as i make it and keeps singing even after i let it go. moreover, i'm trying to make something that doesn't waste my time as a writer, and doesn't waste yours as a reader or player or fellow designer. 

will this make sure players remember all the rules when they're playing? no, absolutely not. i wouldn't want them to, even if i could force it! but maybe, hopefully, what this does do is lodge one of those little razor-sharp slivers of text in their brains, and it'll sing to them just like it sang to me. not the same song, not the same tune, but just as beautifully.

[iri-desky]

○ Hi, TikTok people! ○

Soooo, I rarely ever make posts that address current events like this. Additionally, I doubt that most people on TikTok will be take refuge on Tumblr of all places. That being said, if you happen to be a newcomer to this site who came from TikTok, welcome! It's so nice to have you here!! We're so glad to see you. Now, here's the thing about Tumblr-- Tumblr and Tiktok are basically polar opposites. Lemme rephrase that; there's a lot to learn if you don't know much about here.

So, here's some tips to get you started!

[ Press "keep reading" to continue! ]

• Reblog, reblog, reblog. Reblogging is a way for artists, text posts, and other posts to get seen! It shows them to more people since this site really doesn't have any algorithm. You can reblog literally anything you want as long as the post doesn't have reblogs turned off. Did that text post make you laugh? Reblog it! Did you like that fanfic concept? Reblog it! Did you like that art? Reblog it! You don't need to if you don't want to, but it's very much allowed. "Will I cross someone's boundaries if I reblog too many times?" Nope. Reblog as much as you want, be as weird as you want. Plenty of artists on here take it as a compliment and a sign of excitement. You don't need to be as afraid on here.

• THERE IS NO ALGORITHM!! Everyone on Tumblr over here is equal and clout means basically nothing over here. We just like cool art, funny stuff, and cool ideas. Post your stuff to the tag and just watch as people who are interested in it come to you. We're just here to have fun--this isn't a game of clout. Sit back, relax, and find your people! The days of clout are no more.

• We Tumblr users LOVE reading and writing! It's in our nature. So you're probably gonna see a lot of long posts on here with blocks of texts. Don't be scared of it, check some of them out! That said, short but sweet posts are fun over here too. Feel free to type as much as you want. We have unlimited text over here! It's so cool.

• Speaking of writing and tags, remember how you had to censor your words on TikTok? No need. You can say literally whatever over here and you don't have to fear getting banned. The days of "unalive" and "sewer slide" are ALSO no more. SPEAKING OF WHICH. A lot of users still put tws on their posts and tags. If you're shoving it in the tags, PLEASE do not censor it. It won't filter it if they're using a blacklist.

• The first thing you should do over here after you get your account set up if make your blog look special. Change it to whatever color you want, change the font of your title, change your title to something funny, and change your pfp and banner. It's all to make it you! It also doesn't matter if it's something random for now--us Tumblr users are very wary against bots, and we often block anyone who doesn't have a customized account. Just take your time and have fun, but make sure you don't get blocked by the people you don't want to block you over something silly like looking like a bot!

• You can post videos on here too! Feel free to upload old TikToks you save! I've seen a lot of other TikTok refugees who want to see some old content. I never was on TikTok, though I think it'd be neat to see your old stuff.

• There's lots of communities on here for even the smallest of stuff. If you have a niche interest, go ahead, include it into your introduction-- no one will judge on here and you just might find someone else who's just as crazy over it. You can check the tags for other people who posted about it, too! It's fun to go scrolling through the tags. I included Ducktales 2017 in my interests list--I didn't lose any cool points. I even still post about it! Literally be as weird as you want. We don't care, you have no limits. This is a fandom haven!

• You can have opinions here. Post about the most random crap you want and spit whatever opinions you have, people are very non-confrontational on here. Use your blocklist, you have it for a reason. Blacklist tags you don't want to see. Again, be as weird as you want. You WILL find your people. Just don't go fighting people--unlike TikTok, we'd rather live our lives on here and having beef with other people isn't going to give anyone any clout. You're GOING to see upsetting stuff and opinions that conflict yours (after all, there's no algorithm), but that's okay. Just engage in your interests, speak your opinions, block when you neef to, and enjoy.

Other tumblr users, feel free to add any extra points in the replies!

Oh, and if you're a TikTok refugee who happened to read this, feel free to introduce yourself in the replies. I like meeting new people and it'd feel nice to know this helped someone!

~ Sincerely, Iridesky, a weird individual who loves writing and has way too many interests to count

[cringecompanionapologist]

I Found a Doctor Who RPG Sourcebook and I'm Making It Your Problem

Actually, I found several. It seems that there is a sort of Doctor Who tabletop RPG with sourcebooks for each Doctor that include ready-made character sheets for the Doctors, companions, and major players in each televised story.

I could look into all of them, if I really wanted to, but the thing is, my computer is nearly a decade old, slowly dying on me, and hates screenshots, so taking and storing a fuckton of screenshots of absolutely everything isn't something I can do. So, I'm just pulling a few interesting bits from the Second and Fifth Doctor Sourcebooks. There's no structure to this beyond me thinking "I wonder what their character sheet looks like".

So, the Second Doctor stuff is not much at all. I got the Doctor himself.

I should probably note that I don't have much experience with tabletop RPGs, and none with this one in particular, so I only half know how to read these. This screenshot isn't even very good. I'm working off a free site with a terrible zoom function and I couldn't get the whole thing. The basics are that characters have a set of six Stats, a bunch of Skills, some traits that give them special strengths and weaknesses, and some basic character information. The Second Doctor's got a lot of stuff, some of which even gets explained.

I've deduced that there's probably a separate manual for the basics of how the game works, what the Stats mean, what the Skills do, etc. So a lot of Why These Numbers Are What They Are questions go unanswered.

Any way, this screenshot sucks so much that I can't bare the sight of it any longer, so we're moving on to the next one. Here's Jamie:

Wow! You can actually see things this time.

Most of the stat numbers don't go above 5, from what I can tell. So we can assume that Jamie's strongest stats are Coordination, Presence, and Strength, without any stat being too weak.

The skills are more mixed.

Athletics most likely refers to physical skills, Convince is persuasion, Craft is making stuff, I think, Fighting needs no explanation, Knowledge is...well...knowing stuff, Marksman is shooting/throwing accuracy, Medicine is obviously medical knowledge, Science is...look a lot of these seem like special subcategories of knowledge that are self-explainatory, Subterfuge I think covers "rogue skills" like spying and lock-picking, Survival is the sort of things Boy Scouts learn probably, Technology is computers and technobabble, Transport is driving and the like.

So, when it comes to strengths, Jamie is physically fit, but can't swim. He is very good at fighting because he's a male companion in the 60s that that was like at least 75% of their job. Marksman is apparently based in knife-throwing ability. Subterfuge...well, if you've seen The Enemy of the World, Jamie is actually a pretty good spy.

As for weaknesses, Jamie knows nothing about any STEM field.

There's also a little number for Technology Level. I've seen this number go as high as 7, but the 18th and 19th century characters seem to be placed at a 4. I didn't get a screenshot but Victoria is the same, despite the whole Industrial Revolution thing.

Then we've got some personality traits and such that effect things. Jamie apparently gets points for being attractive and brave, as well as for being accepted anywhere in time and space no matter what he's wearing. There's really not a whole lot to analyze here.

Now, the entire reason I did Second Doctor stuff was because the villains get character sheets and I wanted to see Salamander's. I added the Doctor and Jamie to pretend I had any other reason to be there.

I took this screenshot without using the zoom and it looks pretty good actually.

It turns out that those skill numbers can go above 5 as Salamander scores a 6 in Ingenuity and Presence, as well as a 5 in Resolve. Almost all of his stats are pretty high. As an RPG villain, he's a boss fight.

Instead of a full chart of skills, which only Doctors and Companions get, Salamander just gets a list. His higher points here are Convince at 5, Knowledge at 4, Subterfuge at 5, and Technology at 5. Convince and Subterfuge are his more manipulative skills as a politician, while Knowledge and Technology are because he did, in fact, invent the technology he got popular for inventing. His Tech Level, at a 5, is somewhere between Jamie and Victoria, and some of the more futuristic aliens. That does make sense for the early 21st century, even a slightly more high-tech 21st century than the one that actually happened.

As for Traits, a lot of them give him bonus skills that are actually explained, such as the ability to invent gadgets, resist mind control, menace people into doing what he wants and get even bigger bonuses in Technology and Convince situations, being a tech genius for his time period and a respected authority figure.

So, cool stuff.

The Fifth Doctor stuff I got is a bit more extensive. We'll start with the Doctor himself.

The good news is that it's a full screenshot. The bad news is that it's very hard to read. We can see a very high Ingenuity stat, because he's the Doctor. There's a Tech Level 10, because I'm guessing that's Level Time Lord.

I do have enough info to compare his Skill number to the Second Doctors.

Athletics has risen from 1 to 4 because of all the cricket. Convince drops from a 5 to a 3, because nobody listens to Five while Two was fairly good at getting people to listen to him. Fighting has risen from absolute 0 to 2, which isn't much but it's literally something. You can see a lot of numbers improve slightly as the Doctor has learned more things over time, like Medicine going from 1 to 3.

I actually looked over four different companions this time. We'll go in order of introduction. Here's Adric.

His Tech Level is confusing in the blurry screenshot. But, as for other stuff, his fast healing and ability to control the TARDIS a little are noted, though the reality warping of Block Transfer Computation isn't because it's too damn complicated and has it's own system.

Adric's skills in general are pretty low, but they don't seem to be too unfair. These sourcebooks started coming out around 2013, when the fandom's aggressive Adric hatred had started to wind down, possibly as people realized that all the season 19 companions had writing problems and the confused performances you often get with confused writing, but Tegan and Nyssa stuck around longer so improvements could be made, and Big Finish started doing damage control with them earlier on, especially in Nyssa's case.

I'm actually surprised Adric's Athletics score is as high as it is. His Science score being only a 3 and Knowledge 2 confused me at first, but when I thought about it, it a makes sense. Adric knew a lot about mathematics but basically nothing anything else, even other STEM fields. Nyssa had to tell him what photosynthesis is, which I learned in elementary school science classes. Between this extreme focus on a single subject, lack of socials skills, and somewhat stilted speech and movement, I think I like Adric as much as I do because all this stuff feels like autism and I was an autistic teenager when I first saw him.

He also gets good Subterfuge skills because he can pick locks, do sleight of hand tricks, and overall has a good skill set that was rarely put to use.

And now, Nyssa:

Tech Level 7 explains where Traken is. We'll get to compare several different planets I guess.

Nyssa gets a higher science stat, with an emphasis on biochemistry. She has a more diverse STEM skill set than Adric. Other than that, I don't have much to report here. The fact that she's upper class seems to affect her ability to interact with people who aren't. As you will see, Turlough somehow isn't given this problem despite it being more obvious with him than with Nyssa.

But before that, there's Tegan.

Technology level 5 for the 1980s. These tech levels seem to cover a lot of historical ground. 1746 and 1866 are both in 4 and 1980 and 2018(futuristic version) are both in 5. I wonder what separates these levels from one another.

Tegan is considered fairly ordinary, not a fighter like Jamie nor a scientist like Nyssa, so her stats are kinda bad. Looking at her traits, her skills seem to include running and screaming, with points off for being impulsive, argumentative, and loud. I don't think the people who wrote this liked Tegan very much.

Anyway, of course there's Turlough.

Trion is apparently Tech Level 7, the same as Traken. So that turned out to not be very interesting.

His main strengths are in Convince and Technology. He can half-understand the TARDIS at times and appears to be good at lying to people. The fact that he doesn't get running and screaming in his traits and Tegan does is sexism. He also gets to be charming, though not attractive like Nyssa or Tegan. Men can get this trait, since Jamie did. I think he's commonly seen as average-looking.

Also the fact that he's seen as lucky with all the shit he went through is hilarious.

Finally, as a bit of a bonus, Captain Wrack from Enlightenment has a character sheet. How do you even make stats for an Eternal?

Many of her stats are surprisingly low for basically a low-level god. Though she's got a high Knowledge score and a Tech Level of 12, since Eternals go beyond Time Lords, though it's more power than technology with them, isn't it? Do we just not know how to factor this in?

So when it comes to these tech levels:

18th-19th century Earth = 4

20th-21st century Earth = 5

Traken and Trion = 7

Time Lords = 10

Eternals = 12

That's all I got for now. I hope you enjoyed this bit of fussing over meaningless numbers.

[noodle-shenaniganery]

Hello! You can call me Noodle. I have Fox to thank for that nickname.

Please stop sending me Gaza aid requests. I tried, but I do not have the resources to vet them all and it is really negatively impacting my mental health. I have donated to several fundraisers and aid organizations, but I can’t do the ask thing anymore.

Please, please, please, if you can, write to your senators to urge them to support the No Kings Act. The link I embedded is free, simple, and easy to follow. Millions of lives are at stake.

If you know why @bear-owo and @mentallyillanimal deactivated their accounts, I would appreciate being told.

Here is a list of reasons to live, if you’re struggling to find some. Here is a list of hotlines. Here is a self-care masterpost. I’m always here as a friendly stranger, if needed.

Here are some helpful posts if you’re struggling with handling the election results.

Here is a list of genuinely useful life hacks.

Here is a sex ed masterpost.

Here is a really cool bookstore that focuses on diverse stories.

Do you feed your pet Blue Buffalo? Please don’t.

About Me

I am nonbinary and neptunic (or lesbian, if that makes more sense, though I’m also likely some flavor of aro/ace?), and anything other than she/her pronouns are fine with me.

I am white, trilingual (Portuguese, Spanish, and English, though I’m learning ASL), and from Brazil. 🇧🇷 Oi, gente!

I am also autistic, and have *breathes in dramatically* social anxiety disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, major depressive disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, trichotillomania, dermatillomania, and maladaptive daydreaming issues (it isn’t officially a disorder yet). I am able-bodied and have relatively low support needs.

As you may be able to tell, I don’t really have that good of a sense of what is and isn’t private, so I’ll probably answer any questions you may have! Ask away if you feel like it!

My special interests are: snakes, atypical psychology, Greek mythology, and Egyptian mythology. I also like horror as a genre, as well as art in general.

Some more specific things I like, though, include The Owl House, Extraordinary Attorney Woo, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, Five Nights At Freddy’s, Heartbreak High, Heartstopper, Young Royals, Gravity Falls, Red, White, And Royal Blue, Nimona, Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, Melanie Martinez, Sub Urban, Jack Stauber, and Evelyn Evelyn. Feel free to rant to me about any of these!

Warnings

Since I am autistic, I struggle with social interactions and understanding things. I would appreciate patience.

If I make mistakes, please tell me! Also, I swear I am pretty much never trying to be rude, offensive, or insulting, even if it seems that way. If I say something wrong/bigoted/misleading, please let me know! If my blog isn’t accessible, please let me know how I can improve it (I try to include image descriptions on most of my own images, though unfortunately I struggle with adding them to others’). This is meant to be a safe space. :D

Interactions

I love interacting with folks on here! If you ever want to send me a message, or an ask, or a vent, feel free to do so!

I reblog, like… a lot.

I swear occasionally. Not that often, though.

I don’t technically have much of a tagging system, though I do tag posts that involve someone needing help with “help help help” and asks with “ask ask ask ask”.

Terminology Stuff

To avoid misunderstandings, this is how I use certain terms (and honestly, the only ways they should be used):

Nonspeaking - Not able to reliably communicate through speech (long-term).

Nonverbal - Not able to reliably communicate through speech, and sometimes words (long-term).

A lot of people who cannot speak use this term, and it’s important to respect their preferences.

Important posts about these: https://www.tumblr.com/five-thousand-loaves-of-bread/712714609459593216/my-frustration-with-going-nonverbalnonspeaking

https://www.tumblr.com/five-thousand-loaves-of-bread/755083096785813504/wish-people-actually-respect-me-respect-my

Delusion - A clinically recognisable belief held by an individual who cannot be convinced otherwise, even though the belief is objectively false.

Psychotic - Experiencing psychosis: experiencing things disconnected from reality on a clinical level.

Psychopath - Someone who has Anti-Social Personality Disorder (term has a complex history, though).

Narcissist - Someone who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

Do Not Interact List

I don’t really have a DNI list. Just like. Don’t be mean? If you send me something mean, I will likely not be significantly bothered by it.

I am not trying to start fights. If you are trying to start a fight, and not a genuine discussion, please leave.

I do not tolerate hate against my mutuals of any kind. If you are mean to them, respectfully, please get out.

[vammieposts]

DOCTOR WHO MUSIC RABBIT HOLE WOAH

i love finding doctor who in random places, just now I was struggling to find the lyrics of a Belgrado song bc I was hoping to be able to translate it but I ended up on their bandcamp which led me to this persons profile which led me to this other album with this as the cover!?!? hi cybermen i wasnt expecting to see you guys here. but this ended up leading me down a several hour long rabbit hole of doctor who music as a genre

Ok so as I write this post i'm discovering more and more really good doctor who inspired music that I personally enjoy/think others will enjoy

Chameleon Circuit - probably the most well known doctor who fan band, very fun, rock, 2008-2014, according to wikipedia they invented the term "Time Lord Rock", or "Trock", which is used to describe music created for and by doctor who fans about doctor who

Hero of a Hundred Fights - The Remote, The Cold (2001) - Faction Paradox stuff, sort of math-rock, they're really good! lots of BIG SOUND as my brain describes it, and cool lyrics+art, from Wisconsin according to wikipedia, my fellow eda fans, this is for YOU (tbh this and solid space are my favorites so far, chameleon circuit is good but doesn't appeal to me much personally)

Solid Space - Space Museum - as I described above, this stuff has a fun sort of electronic atmospheric feel, makes you feel like you're in a big empty fancy building at night, the kind of music you can wiggle slowly to and feel like a little robot person, has songs called the Tenth Planet and Earthshock, if you like cybermen you'll like this lol

DOCTOR IN DISTRESS - of course, I couldn't possibly leave this out could I? Very Important Song

Viva Computer - This Town will Never Let Us Go - calm, fun electronicy, as you can probably guess based on the songs namesake, faction paradox!

Starvefish - This Town Will Never Let Us Go - Also faction paradox!

The Go Go's - I'm Gonna Spend My Christmas with a Dalek - a beautiful product of dalek mania, my favorite christmas song, and the most confusing description of a dalek I've ever heard which includes at least one large toe. Included on the compilation, "Who is Dr Who"

The Art Attacks - I am a Dalek! - fun song! rock, feels very 80s but i don't know much about music tbh oh wait its 1978, pretty close!

Time Crash - another "Time Lord Rock" band, if you want to find them on youtube don't mix it up with the Time Crash: Children in Need special tho. I like the lead's voice a lot! its very chill and fun!

Also, these aren't doctor who themed, just related via actors, but Peter Capaldi was in a post-punk band called the Dreamboys and Billie Piper was a pop artist!

Some Doctor who Music fun: (doctor who, Delia Derbyshire, and the BBC radiophonic workshop have a really interesting place in electronic music history soo have fun learning)

But yeah there's my collection from this morning, and these are just my own personal taste plus a couple that are really good and I think others will enjoy so please rb with your favorite bands and songs you think should be added!

[h-didanart]

Hello everyone! Can I interest you in some Age Swap stuff with my Bloodmoons?

No? Well I’m dumping the stuff on you anyways!

But first things first, I will say this isn’t exactly a full on age swap, most of my Bloodmoons are in the 20s age range with three exceptions who are all teens.

So! I exaggerated the age differences.

There’s the elementary age kids, the middle schoolers, the dead teens, and the two almost 30 adults.

Now enjoy the rambling!

Ocean is literally the reason I started this to begin with, I wanted to draw them being a badass pirate or something. They would sail the seas alongside their family, exploring the oceans and islands as they did so. Generally I could see them toning down on the impulsiveness, probably from a couple more close calls with death, and since they’d be around FC a lot I could see them becoming surprisingly patient for a Bloodmoon. Also I wanted to make them have dreadlocks but I don’t know how to draw that hairstyle :(

Now the other adult here, Amnesiac. I didn’t know where to even start for their design but I got the idea to give them those crutches that aren’t called crutches because of their issues with mobility, and the rest of the design was easy to make after that. I don’t see them changing a lot personality wise, mainly I could see them acquiring a more grumpy attitude due to the situation with their family, but they’d generally still be one of the kindest Bloodmoons around. And about their disability thing, I have actually been contemplating giving them mobility aids in their canon. I just feel like it might be good for their character and story since their issues stem from that lack of sync they have which is not something they’re going to fix just like that or at least to the point the previous Bloodmoon was at, so Ruby and Vermillion would look for ways to manage their issues which could then be interpreted by their family and the Celestials as them giving up on ever learning to cooperate, when in actuality they’re both on the exact same page for this and are actively working together to better their everyday life.

Anyways— those are the responsible adults here. There technically should be two others but they’re kinda… uh, dead and stuck in a timeless plane of existence or something, so no age swap stuff with them

So it’s just Amnesiac and Ocean taking care of 7+ small Bloodmoons, with emotional support from the Musical duo

Let’s take a look at what the kids are like, shall we?

Starting off strongly with Lone. He’s a very very angry kid, aggressive, rude, mean, generally unpleasant. This would 100% stem from his trust issues and the death of his twin, and then the adults around him not caring enough to look under all the anger. But he would manage to have one friend through all his lashing out, and they’d become very close despite the adults around them trying to keep them apart. That one friendship might be enough to pull him out of the self destructive pit he’s sinking into.

(And now I want to draw little Sprout and Original running around, great)

Next up, Magic. I literally just drew them when they were younger, right before everything went wrong in their life. They’re very excitable and energetic, looking forward to their special duties as a magical girl and very grateful that they got a chance to still be together. They’d actually be in the intended magical girl age range from the system I’m using, I think, I haven’t watched the anime yet, I will someday I swear—

And now swap! Little swap is a kitten, highly energetic and absolutely adorable. They would steal a lot of Kill_Code’s stuff and misplace it, kinda not their fault cuz ADHD + blind, but still. Though they kept the hat, they really like the hat. And unlike their canon version, they wouldn’t be maliciously aggressive, it’d just be a thing that happens sometimes. Y’know, because cat.

OK LIStEn liSten— They are my favorite, they are being included.

Retired would be a concerningly easy kid to handle, though still labeled troublesome due to their propensity to zone out at random and just kinda fall asleep wherever. They wouldn’t talk much if at all, but they will hiss and growl if anyone ever gets too close to them. Despite their very distant exterior though, they’d be very clingy towards those they do trust. And though untrusting of others, they would try to do small things to cheer up any sad people they find. Follow in their older brother’s footsteps, y’know?

Lord BM, oh boy. This is basically a Collector Owl House situation, a kid with the powers of a God who uses them to play whatever games they wish to play. Would they understand how strong their powers are? Absolutely not. Would they wreck chaos on the world because of that? Yes. But can you really look them in the eyes and stay mad at them for it?

The next one’s design I messed up, they’re supposed to be their vampire form, not the demon one. Regardless, Fantasy would be a chaos wrecker, very hyper and very easily bored, they will cast dangerous spells just because they think they’re neat. They would 100% set several houses on fire and then flee the scene cackling wildly into the night. And they would pull off the innocent act very well too, especially in their bat form. They’re just an innocent wittle cweachur who’d do no wrong whatsoever :3

Next up is Horror! They would change outfits constantly, mostly sticking to hoodies but playing around a lot with whatever clothes they can find. They would retain their love for scary stuff which would be freaky and definitely make the adults around them concerned about them, but they too would retain their kind and optimistic demeanor. The two AIs would generally get along better, though they’d still have their disagreements, mainly about how to treat others, Hatchet is way too blunt and rude while Heaven is a bit of an anxious wreck. And I like to think that in this scenario Eclipse would be their younger brother while Dear would be their older sister, it’s funny to me.

Second to last Bloodmoon, Withered Hopes! They’d be a very happy kid, which is weird because they do//know a lot of stuff that’s extremely concerning. They can survive on their own, find their own food and make their own shelter, they can even make haphazardly thrown together weapons, which is good but also a really bad sign that their environment isn’t exactly friendly to them. And their reactions to violence absolutely do not help that, they could hit someone over the head with a pan and shrug it off as not a big deal, they could see a fox tearing into a chicken and not feel any disturbance whatsoever. They’re kinda messed up actually… well damn, now I feel kinda bad for them. Funny scenario to lift the spirits up, older Stitchwraith looking after them and Buzzsaw and trying to parent them but being very bad at it.

And finally we have the Separated twins! They’re very clingy to one another, no surprises there, and they’re arguably the best chaotic duo around. They’d tag team people with their pranks, often orchestrated by Harvest and activated by Hunter, they are menaces together. The least harmful menaces around, that is. They’d do their best to match one another mainly wearing similar clothes, and often taking turns on choosing what to play, Hunter liking tag and general physical activity, Harvest liking video games more. Should be worth mentioning that they do have a couple dietary restrictions//requirements, Harvest can only eat red food while Hunter needs to eat meat, this is also the case in their canon.

[yonderghostshistories]

I'm planning on starting that MP Regency AU fanfiction! What should I include? (U, PG and 18+ suggestions are all welcome!)

OH MY GOD YOU'RE ACTUALLY DOING IT?!?!!? LESS GOOOOOOO!!!!!

Ok uhh here's my suggestions!! :

-All (well technically 3) the Pythons have a really specific kinda Regency royal/heir-like title/nicknames to them based on where they were born (i.e some random examples; John Cleese, Earl of Weston-super-Mare, Captain/Admiral/General Graham Chapman, Duke of Leicester, Terry "Jonesy" Jones, Baron of Colywn Bay of North Wales). Then you have Vicar Michael Palin (of Sheffield), Baron Terry Gilliam from Paris, France (he says he's a Baron but the others don't really believe him and thinks he's really a phony or something lol), and self proclaimed "Maestro" Eric Idle (from the local Cheshire pub). Then you also have Stableboy Neil (Innes)/Neil the humble Stableboy, Countess Carol Cleveland and Countess Connie Booth (in this AU, Connie is Carol's older half-sister/cousin) of London, Lieutenant David Sherlock (Gray's second-in-command in the army, and also love interest but pretends to just "be friends" so to not make people suspicious about their relationship with eachother, etc!

-Gray is both a highly respected army official by day (at work technically), and a promiscuously gay playboy by night (when he has the time off doing the army business). He smokes alot too.

-Jonesy ends up with Regency era Denise Coffey and learns that she's not as "bad" as anyone makes her out to be. She's considered"bad" because she's apparently "too common" to fit with society. In other words, society thinks she's "too unattractively normal" to be considered pretty, to which she politely says bullshit to :).

-John and Gray are childhood best friends with eachother. Michael and Jonesy are also childhood best friends with eachother. Eric and Terry tags along as well.

-John becomes instantly uhh "emo" and tragic and moody and cold because of his recent breakup with his (ex-)fiancé Connie, even though they just broke up since almost a week ago. He mopes about it all the bloody time that even his friends start to get annoyed by it all, and it makes even his own sappy poetry look like decent stuff.

-Eric and Neil meet up at the weekends to play as a musical duo at the local Cheshire pub. Eric is, ofc, sorta homeless, meaning he has to to stay over at Neil's cottage house but also stay at the local taverns until he has to pay rent.....but mostly he chills out at Neil's house.

-Eric gets a "rags to riches" kinda story where, with the help of Gray who just so happen to be at the local Cheshire pub to "meet a special friend of his" (which is ofc David) in which Gray overhears the pretty good singing, he agrees to hire Eric as his servant and give him a permanent place to stay and enough money to live by. Eric is ecstatic ofc!

-Michael is a kind and innocent vicar, a follower of god, but he's a bit horny too! He particularly has a crush on a nice and kind woman called Helena (who runs the local bookshop in the town). Mike has the hots for Helen but knows he can't actually ask her out due to him being religious and stuff and it apparently going against the rules to marry whilst preaching about god or something. However, he tries to get around this by starting out slow, via becoming companions with Helena by helping her with the bookshop part-time. It all seems going to plan. However, things start to get a bit too *spicy* when Michael accidentally sees Helena in her regency era undergarments (which is a "stay"-kinda undergarment) just as she was about to get unchanged. As if it couldn't get any worse, the stunned Michael commits the greatest sin he has ever committed.......he sees a bit of her bare back. That alone is enough to make Michael faint. Helena, being the good and understanding friend she is, helps Michael get back to life and takes care of the poor soul. Michael is grateful for Helena helping him, but feels guilty for seeing her like that. Helena tells him that it's ok and that it was an accident at the end of the day. Michael smiles, and out of the repressed passion he held back for all these years, he slowly cups her face and begins kissing Helena, and Helena, at first surprised, is then quickly eased and understands and kisses back Michael. Michael and Helena then have the most excruciatingly passionate sex that night, and both are left satisfied.

-Gray meets David in an abandoned farmhouse, and they both announce their feelings for one another, and they both kiss passionately and uhh have the most beautiful gay sex one could ever hope.

-There's alot of "characters running through the moors" whenever the character starts a new relationship, romantic or platonic.

-Gray wakes up naked every morning after each promiscuous affair.

-Terry the Parisian Artist develops a romance with the ""weird"" woman who runs the tailoring clothes shop, Ms Margret "Maggie" Weston. Terry & Maggie bond over their shared weirdness and love for absurdities in life.

-John and Connie began an (almost) lifelong romance (before they broke up) when they were young teenagers of about 16/15 at a ball one night. From there on, they hit it off with each other pretty well. The young John and Connie then sneakily exited from the ballroom, then they snuck out and playfully ran to the garden maze and then snogged each other all night long.

-The Pythons and Co go to a regency era fairground/carnival and have a lovely, fun time there. They also get to ride on the merry-go-round on the merry-go-round horses!

Uhh hope you enjoyed the ideas I gave! Let me know which of the ideas is your favourite and why? I absolutely can't wait to read it!!

[monstroso]

literally what makes the aristocats bad. its got nice songs. it has silly characters. it’s got really pretty backgrounds and the old hand-drawn disney animation. it’s inspired by a true story. what’s there to dislike.

(*cough* aside from the racism that permeates most if not all of the old Disney movies but since that’s present in so many of them no special case should to be made against the aristocats for it to be a worse movie because of that shared trait *cough*)

also I hope this didn’t come across as like. confrontational or anything bc it’s not supposed to be. legitimately want to hear your thoughts 👍

No, I love this! I appreciate being asked my thoughts, especially since the good people in the tags have told me loud and clear that I am in the minority on this one.

I will say, I did not expect the poll to have quite the legs it's got on it now. My polls usually only get about 60 votes. If I'd known 4,700 strangers and counting would have an opinion on this, I might have worded it differently. The real reason I didn't include The Aristocats is because I knew it would run away with the thing. Most people consider it a classic, regardless of what my opinions on it actually are. I thought throwing in a cheeky little line about it would be a fun gag for my followers who know I'm a true hater at heart.

Before I even got this ask - and because the overwhelming majority of the tags on the poll are telling me I have no taste - I actually did start rewatching it! Hundreds of strangers on the internet have never been wrong before, right? Part of the problem is I have next to no nostalgia for it. We didn't own the VHS when I was a child, so the only times I ever saw it were when I'd go to a friend's house or borrow it from the library. Maybe my judgement was clouded by not having seen it in a very long time.

First things first: The good stuff. There are parts of this film that rank alongside the best of the Disney classics, and I would be remiss in not mentioning them.

The music, for one, is pretty good. You'd have to be some kind of real Scrooge not to enjoy "Ev'rybody Wants to Be a Cat" of course, but on a rewatch I did find myself grinning through "Thomas O'Malley Cat" as well. This is an easy point in the film's favor though, as I'm an absolute sucker for both big band and jazz. This is great use of your Scatman Crothers and Phil Harris, top points awarded for these two numbers in particular.

The animation is also pretty good. Especially on Edgar and Thomas O'Malley. Your mileage may vary on the Xerox style, but the animation itself is relatively unimpeachable. This was still during the era of the Nine Old Men, so there's all kind of impressive work being done with the big sweeping things like character movement and expression as well as in the more subtle animations like expressions and mouth movement.

The cats are doing all the cat stuff you'd expect like licking their paws and poof'ing their tails, but there's less expected movements here too, like arching their backs when walking alongside things or rolling in the dirt to dry off from the river. This is good character work, but it's also pretty standard for guys like Milt Kahl and Eric Larson. If you're at all interested in animation, I highly encourage you to read more about the Nine Old Men and their history with the studio.

(A big thanks to the tumblr gif artists for gif'ing the parts of this movie that look good so I can spice this post up with some relevant visuals!)

Now, the bad. Like many movies from this era, The Aristocats has something of a pacing problem. While it is necessary to do the work of setting up the conflict in the beginning, you might be surprised to learn that it takes 25 minutes for Thomas O'Malley to show up, which is when the story actually starts.

A huge part of the problem is that this movie suffers from a sort of directionless vignetticism that seems to have been driven only by the idea that it would be cute to see the animals do X, Y, and Z. "Oh wouldn't it be sweet to see the kitten paint?" "Wouldn't it be so adorable if the cat played the piano?" "Ohh, what if the mouse ate a cracker dipped in milk, wouldn't that be darling?" I have a very high tolerance for schmaltz, but The Aristocats is where even I must draw the line.

When the movie isn't being tooth-rottingly sweet, it's frequently boring, and when it's not being either of those things it's showing you another chase scene with the dogs and the butler. It's erratic, tiring, and strains the limits of the modern attention span even at the movie's incredibly sparse runtime. It's a 79 minute film and you feel all 79 of those minutes.

Tonally, much of the movie smacks of the kind of rose-tinted sentimentalism Disney was known (and even criticized at the time) for, but without the guiding hand of the man himself, nearly 5 years gone by this point. The studio was floundering in the wake of Walt's death, and The Aristocats is quite close to the nadir of this particular creative valley - though the distinction arguably goes to Robin Hood, I'm much softer on that film for a number of reasons.

The Aristocats reminds me a lot of Lady & the Tramp, in that it's the same story (down to the aforementioned racist caricatures of Siamese cats), but with cats instead of dogs and with a much less focused sense of purpose, tone, and creative direction. If you like The Aristocats for the music and the beautiful scenery, but you haven't seen Lady & the Tramp, give that one a try instead. The animation is better, the music is about on-par, and it doesn't have as many stupid chase scenes. Or just watch 101 Dalmatians, which outstrips both films on sheer charm alone.

I think I had more I wanted to say, but it was mostly rambling that got away from the point. On rewatch, I don't think this movie is as bad as I remember it being, but I stand by my decision not to include it in the poll.

tl;dr - The Aristocats isn't the worst. If you grew up watching it I totally understand having a soft spot for the music and the atmosphere. In a vacuum, I can't say I think it holds up but ultimately I'm not going to judge anyone for enjoying it. Thanks for the ask!

[flowersandbirdsflyingfree]

The boomershooter / postal matchup thing… omg… im so embarrassed to participate in this but im gonna self indulge, i hope these arent getting annoying to you..! My focus is on postal but you can include whatever you want yes!

Idrk how I should do this, but im a enby femboy kinda critter if that makes sense? 20 y/o 5’5 slim and kinda awkward looking i think? Short messy brown w bangs hair that i bleach, brown eyes round face stuff like that. I like wearing anything from boxers and a comfy silly hoodie to jfashions like lolita and jirai. Am autistic, im not super social and of course dislike crowds and all that, am a neet. Paranoia and delusions yada yada very silly and whatnot. Special interests are niche music genres and artists as well as physical music media collecting, plus computers / retro gaming / internet history. Love collecting old tech and consoles, repairing them and the sort. Can be found browsing the internet archive for interesting software or music. Am an avid collector and preservationist, owning several collections of different things ranging from vinyl to vintage magical girl figures. I keep bugs like praying mantis, beetles and snails as pets, often just catching whatever bug i think looks cool!

When it comes to relationships (ive never been in one and wld probably cry if i got my hand held bc itd be so overwhelming and kinda awesome,,,) i prefer commitment and can get really attached super easily i fear. Would hope to find someone who doesnt mind my anxiousness and cringefail neet lifestyle. Id stay home and clean or cook for them when im not playing vidyagames in return, itd be nice methinks… would bite and chew on provided matchup as a stim so hopefully they are cool with that.!

sorry if this is too long i dont usually ever do asks or things like this, thank you…! I love your blog-!

Thank you so much!! I think we’ll give you a double whammy

Your Boomer Shooter Boyfriend:

Gordon Freeman

Gordon is selectively mute. When he does talk to you, it’s usually a two to three word sentence. Despite his silence, there is a loud confidence about his presence.

Be assured that if you ever get in an uncomfy situation that Gordon will lead you by the arm to breathe somewhere. As long as you are comfortable, Dr. Freeman best expresses himself with acts of service and quality time. I can see him holding your hand or pulling you in for a long hug if you need help to cool down from an overstimulating crowd.

Your preservation interest is really interesting! Science and history go hand in hand usually. You can share with him all about physical and digital media. He’s a great listener.

In return, maybe he can bring you to Black Mesa one day to see some of his work. Gordon has an interest with chemistry and physics that continues outside his job. He hopes you’d be interest to learn from him too

Your Postal Dude:

Brain Damaged Dude

He likes your insect friends. Picture you finish dressing up. You hear to the living room to be greeter by Dude sitting on the couch with snails running up his arm and a praying mantis dancing on his head. “Mornin’, honey.” They’re watching Mythbusters together

I headcanon that Brain Damaged takes place post-Paradise Lost from Postal 2. For a while, he just stays in his trailer to cool off from all the events of everything that fucking happened. Dude is fucking tired of everyone so it’s a miracle he met a cute femboy enby who he can just vibe with from the noise outside

He’s all for your special interests, especially when it comes to video games and internet archival stuff. The Dude has surprisingly deep knowledge for lost media too. I can see you blowing his mind with some of the stuff you have collected over the years. Oh and Dude has some serious munchies so it’s heavily appreciates that you can actually cook stuff! But he will steal your french fries in addition to him already having his own.

Dude has paranoid delusions too. Usually coming from his nightmares. But he’ll do his best to try and comfort you. While he lacks in expressing himself in words (that have niche references every 0.5 seconds), he can at least be by your side to provide a way to ride it out. Lean on him and let him be there to take good care of you.

Bonus mention bc I see this happening with the chewing stim

[ikeromantic]

Alice in College, pt 5

An IkeRev Central characters AU! Written for my IkeRev 1K Celebration, a boarding school AU was the poll winner. Approx. 3000 words. 5/6

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Mousse was asleep again. Alice crept past him and sat at one of the desks. She wondered if he even noticed that she skipped part of her detention yesterday. In fact, she was fairly sure she could skip the entire thing for the rest of the week and just tell him she’d been there while he slept. But that seemed . . . wrong. Mousse was nice and she didn’t want to lie to him.

He did not stir when she pulled a book from the pile and began to read and make notes. 

Alice tried to focus on her studies. There was so much to catch up on, and not just the obvious course work. Students that grew up in Cradle had a whole lifetime of knowledge they took for granted. They knew how crystals worked, where things were, what was safe and what wasn’t . . . She was trying to cram all of that, the practical knowledge and the academic, all at once. 

“You are getting a wrinkle between your brows.” Mousse surprised her when he spoke, his voice still muddled with sleep. 

“Oh. Ha, yeah.” She rubbed the spot above her nose. “I always make that face when I’m thinking.”

Mousse smiled. “It’s a cute face. It tells me you are hard at work.” He stood and moved to stand beside her desk. “What have you selected? Oh! Geography. One of my favorite subjects.” He pulled a chair over and sat beside her, leaning close to read the page she was on.

Alice felt a bit self conscious as she flipped to the next page. “I’m still just reading up on the regions in Cradle, where the cities and towns are. Basic stuff.”

“You have to start with the basics.” He leaned forward, his fingertip tracing the curve of Cradle’s Central District. “These lines represent centuries of history, at least. And uncounted hours of diplomacy.”

“That’s what you’re interested in, right?”

Mousse beamed at her. “Very good, Alice. I see you do listen and learn, even if you sometimes skip out on detention.”

She blushed, realizing he must have woken up after she left yesterday. “Sorry about that.”

He patted her hand. “It’s alright. I won’t tell if you don’t. Learning is about passion for your subject, not punishment for trespassing.” 

“Don’t tell Dean that. He seemed pretty sure the best way to keep me out of trouble is to keep me busy.” Alice sighed. 

“Dean is a very passionate man. He loves learning but he can be . . . a bit strict.” Mousse tilted his head, his hand still resting atop hers. “Are you passionate, Alice?”

Her eyes went wide at the question and her heart skipped a beat. “P-passionate?”

“Yes. I would love to know what you are interested in.”

“Oh. Yes. I - I am.” Alice took a breath. “I love making things. It was what I liked about working in the pâtissière. I’m looking forward to learning what I can make and do here, in Cradle.”

Mousse smiled warmly. “I am sure you’ll find something. Perhaps I can even be a help.”

“Thank you.” She smiled back, feeling silly for thinking he might have meant something less . . . academic. “I should probably get going. I have class soon.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Alice. Have a good day.” 

“You too, Mousse.” She gathered her things and hurried to her first class of the day. Her mind wasn’t on her lessons though. Alice was still excited at the prospect of discovering what her special powers could do. She had some ideas already for ways to test it, things to try. 

By the time lunch came around and she had a chance to talk with Amon and Dalim, Alice had a list in her notebook. There were so many things she didn’t know about how the magic of Cradle worked, so she’d included every scenario she could imagine. It was a lot.

She sat down with her tray and opened the notebook just as Amon slid into the chair beside her. Without asking, he snagged the notebook and scanned her notes. 

Alice gave him a little frown, but couldn’t hold his eagerness against him. “So, what do you think? Is it a good start?”

“Quiet.” He didn’t look up. 

“Rude.” She rolled her eyes and started on her lunch. She still couldn’t decide how she felt about this new friend. He was hot and cold and seemed to have a hard time with social skills. It was endearing, but also a little annoying. 

Dalim sat down a few moments later, and gave her one of his brilliant smiles. “Hello prin- Alice.” He cocked his head to the side, his glance flicking to Amon and back. “Did you get started without me?”

“No, Amon is just reading through my ideas. We haven’t tal-”

“You are distracting me.” Amon didn’t look up as he interrupted.

Dalim snickered. “I see he’s being his usual charming self. You must have written some interesting things if he’s this focused.”

Alice smiled. “Well, it’s just a bunch of ideas I had about what magic crystals might do and how my power could work against it. I was thinking, should he ask Harr and Loki to join us? Or Oliver?”

Amon did look up at this, his expression a mask of distaste. “No. Silver is a coward and Loki is a loose cannon. I won’t waste my time with a child either. They can’t be trusted. None of them.”

“You didn’t say anything to them about your power, did you?” Dalim looked genuinely concerned.

“No? Why?”

Dalim leaned close, his voice pitched low. “I don’t want to talk about it here, but trust me. You need to keep that a secret between just the three of us. Things could get ugly for you otherwise. And I don’t want anything bad to happen to my princess.”

Alice blinked at his nominative. She was his friend, perhaps, but not his per se. But whatever protest she might have given over being named such came second to the cold fear that knotted in her belly. “Do you mean someone might hurt me? Because I can - because of what I can do?”

“You shouldn’t look so surprised,” Amon interjected. “People are always looking for advantage. For power. If they knew you carried this in you from the Land of Reason, you would be taken for experimentation. Testing. Control.” His expression was gleefully malicious. “If you lived through it, you would never be free.”

“Don’t worry, princess. We won’t let anything like that happen to you.” Dalim stroked her back reassuringly. “Just . . . don’t share it with anyone else, alright?”

Alice gave a mute nod. She couldn’t imagine Harr or Loki or anyone she’d met so far trying to hurt her, but maybe they would let it slip to someone else. Like the Red and Black armies, for example. They would probably like to use someone with her power in their war. From her studies, it seemed the two sides would never be at peace until one side was victorious. That wasn’t a conflict she wanted to get involved with.

Amon gave her a thin smile and slid her notebook back to her. “Let’s start this weekend. We’ll keep our experiments up in the tower, and -” his smile widened, “we’ll make sure you don’t get caught.”

Dalim chuckled. “Yeah. Can’t have you stuck in detention another week.”

Alice frowned at them. “I’m glad you think it’s funny.”

“You are so cute when you pout.” Dalim touched her cheek. “But you’re cuter when you smile.”

“Who says I want to be cute?” Alice tried to ignore the sudden rush of blood to her cheeks and the fluttering in her stomach. It wasn’t fair at all that Dalim could have that effect with just a touch and a smile. 

Amon snorted and rolled his eyes. “Whatever. As long as you show up, I don’t care if you’re cute or not.”

Throughout lunch, Alice felt like someone was watching her. She thought at first it was nerves. The result of Dalim and Amon’s warning, obviously. But when she managed to glance around the room, she found Harr’s gaze settled on her. His dark eye was fixed in her direction. When she caught him, his cheeks turned rosy and he quickly looked away. 

She didn’t say anything to Dalim and Amon about it, but she wondered if he’d overheard something between them. 

Her afternoon classes sped past, not half so interesting as her weekend plans - or the dinner planned with Blanc. Alice hadn’t let herself think about that too much. When she imagined being alone with Blanc, her cheeks went hot and there was a fluttery feeling in her chest. She just hoped she didn’t act like an idiot in front of him. Freezing up or babbling or turning as red as a tomato over nothing.

Alice decided to dress up a bit for the occasion - not because she liked Blanc, she told herself - but because her school clothes were plain. She wanted to look cute. After class, she hurried to her room and pulled off her apron and pinafore, and began rummaging in her wardrobe. There wasn’t a lot in there - her trip to Cradle wasn’t exactly planned, and she hadn’t done much shopping. 

There was a formal dress, but the layered skirt and beaded bodice were way too much for dinner. A pair of canvas work pants and a heavy cotton shirt with a sweater . . . hard pass. She pulled a light silk blouse out, and a cute short skirt to go with it. The color was perfect for her eyes and the skirt was just long enough to be proper and just short enough to be flirty. Alice laid them on the bed and went to get a pair of stockings. 

She was bending down to reach into her drawer when the door flew open. Alice spun around with a shriek. Dressed in just her panties and a bra, she ineffectually tried to cover everything with her hands.    

Harr stood in the doorway, his face shading from red into purple. His mouth was slightly open and his eyes were as wide as saucers. After a moment, he backed out. His hand reached for the door and closed it slowly, without saying a word. 

Alice quickly threw on her clothes and jerked the door open to see if he was still out there. He was, standing off to one side, and still cycling through shades of crimson. “You! Haven’t you ever heard of knocking?”

“S-sorry. I didn’t realize - I thought -” Harr struggled with a reply, finally settling on a repetition of ‘sorry’ in various forms. 

“Whatever. Just . . . what did you want?” Alice crossed her arms, feeling completely out of sorts. Her face was hot and her heart was pounding, and it was definitely his fault. Though she couldn’t decide if she was more angry about him walking in, or more pleased that he’d been speechless at the sight of her, or embarrassed that anyone saw her in her panties like that, much less someone as gorgeous as Harr Silver. 

He took a deep breath, still unsettled himself. “I wanted to catch you after class, but you practically ran out.” His skittering gaze finally landed on her and stayed. “Amon is dangerous. Please be careful around him. And whatever he has told you . . . it might be best if you find answers yourself.”

Alice felt her brows rise in surprise. “You wanted to warn me about Amon?”

Harr nodded. “He has his own ambitions. And others have gone missing after gaining his attention.” He cleared his throat. “It would be a shame. For you to disappear.” 

“I’ll be careful.” She paused and then added, “Thanks. And, I’m sorry I yelled at you. I probably should have locked the door before I got dressed.”

“Umm.” Harr turned and walked away, his gait stiff and a little awkward. 

Alice wasn’t sure what to make of that. First a warning from Dalim and Amon, and now one about them. Making friends in Cradle was more complicated than she supposed. “It would be so nice if things made sense,” she murmured. It seemed she would need to try to stay cautious until someone showed their hand. Then she’d know who wanted to be a friend, and who was false.

At least Blanc wasn’t problematic. He’d been kind since the moment they met. Alice smiled, thinking of his gentle gaze and sweet smile. She finished getting ready for their dinner, just a touch of make-up and her hair pulled up in a delicate braid. Someone knocked at her door just as she finished putting in her earrings.

It was Blanc, come to get her for their dinner. He looked as dapper as ever in a dove gray vest and pale pink shirt. He smiled as she opened the door and gave her a little bow. “You look especially beautiful this evening. I am feeling even luckier to spend some time with you.”

Alice felt her heart give an extra squeeze as he took her hand and brushed a kiss across her knuckles. “You look really nice too.” 

“Thank you.” He held out his arm. “Are you ready to go or do you need another few moments?”

“I’m ready.” 

Blanc linked his arm in hers and led her away from the girls’ dorms. He kept up a polite chatter, asking her about her classes and what subject she was enjoying. It was nothing of any importance, really, but his interest and the way he listened made her feel special. The warmth of his side against hers, and the gentle pressure of his fingers on her arm were completely disarming and distracting. 

He led her to a section of the school she’d only seen in passing. A large atrium encased in glass that held a soft blue glow Alice had come to associate with the magic of Cradle. It was hard to see what sorts of things grew inside from outside the enclosure. It was just a vague collage of green shades.

“This section is usually reserved for students of botany and alchemy majors, but being an upperclassman has a few advantages.” Blanc winked at her as he opened a door hidden so cleverly that it looked like any other part of the glass wall. 

Inside was a tangle of extraordinary plant life. Flowers and leaves in profusion, some similar to things Alice knew, like basil and ivy, while others were so strange they looked more like animals or stones than plants. The air within was scented differently too. A pleasant, earthy smell with sweet citrus and sharp floral aromas. 

“It’s very nice.” Alice reached for one of the nearby vines. The leaves looked velvety soft, covered with a fine furry looking white coat atop the green of the leaf. 

Blanc caught her hand in his and squeezed it gently. “It’s best not to touch anything in here.”

“Oh!” Her surprise was more from realizing Blanc’s hand was free of his usual gloves, and his bare palm was pressed to hers. “I - ok.”

He kept her hand in his as he led her to a small table with settings for two. Silver lids covered the two plates, and the glasses beside them were pearled with condensation from the chilled opaque drink they held. 

Blanc let go as she sat down, and took his spot across from her. “I finally have you all to myself, and now I find that I’m at a loss for what to say.”

Alice gave a nervous laugh. “Yeah. Me too.” She toyed with the end of her braid. “You could, maybe, tell me about you?”

“I’m not a very fascinating subject,” he chuckled. “I am working on my dissertation. The Magical Calamities of Cradle. Not the most cheerful subject.” Blanc shrugged. “Sometimes I teach. Not very interesting.”

“I don’t know, that sounds pretty exciting to me. I didn’t know there were magical calamities!” 

“You flatter me.” Blanc took a sip from his glass. “What about you? I have read your student file, of course, as I was on your admissions committee, but there’s more to any person than what fits on a page.”

Alice took a swallow of her drink as well, surprised to find it a tame elderflower flavor with notes of hibiscus and a sharp, tart aftertaste. The gentle burn of it in her belly relaxed her. “I’m nothing special. A shop girl selling sweets, until I fell down a rabbit hole.”

“Chasing me.” He shook his head. “I am sorry for bringing you into this mess. It must be very challenging, but I must say, you handle yourself gracefully.”

“Don’t apologize. It’s been the best thing. I learned magic is real, and the world is bigger and stranger than I ever knew. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.” She hurried to reassure him.

Blanc sighed. “You really are too precious. But what will happen when you miss your home, your friends? Your family? You’ll leave just as -” He cleared his throat, “Just as anyone might expect.”

Alice wasn’t sure how much she wanted to share, but there was something about Blanc that made her want to trust him. “I don’t have any family. My only real friend was my old boss. I care for him but . . . I don’t want to work in his shop my whole life. I want more. I want something I can fall in love with.”

“Fall in love, hm?” He leaned closer, studying her expression as one might read and re-read a challenging text. “That is the oldest magic there is. And the most dangerous.”

“Isn’t love a good thing?” 

“Is it?” Blanc settled back in his chair with an unreadable expression. “Let’s see what supper hides under such a fancy cover. I hope it’s something with carrots.” 

He lifted her silver lid first and then his own. There were indeed carrots, cut in little circles and cooked with cinnamon and brown sugar until they were golden and sweet. Besides that, roasted potatoes and leeks, eggplant frittata, and a little roll of fresh baked bread. It looked delicious.

Alice grinned, successfully distracted from her line of questioning. “This place has the best food. Everything looks deli-”

Her words cut off as the floor beneath them shook with a sudden, loud boom. 

Blanc was up in a flash. He grabbed her hand and pulled her along with him. “We need to see what that was. Stay close.”

Part 6

[ink-flavored]

1, 7, 11, 16, 18, 28 & 30 for pride and justice?

EHEHEH i am clicking my little heels together thank you

1. What’s their love languages?

For Pride, it's physical touch and words of affirmation. He loves attention and being told he's very special. And like, after many thousands of years of not having either of those things, I think he deserves it

Justice could be argued for any of them tbh, but I think most of all is quality time and acts of service, sprinkled with words of affirmation. He finds the most fulfillment from being with and helping other people, and luckily for him, Pride needs both of those things so much.

7. Who is the more romantic one?

Justice, no question. In Heaven, both he and Kindness were both very close friends with an angel of Love, so he's had the adjacency to romance for a long time, without ever being able to participate. The perfect recipe to concoct a hopeless romantic. Compound this with his book club friends introducing him to romance novels and like... that's it. He's gone.

He and Pride have a bit of a stumbling block at the beginning of their relationship because Justice is SO ready to buy the roses and go on dates and get the matching pajamas and stuff, but Pride is an exposed wire of raw emotion who can't do much more than give him a haunted stare after the never-before-experienced-vulnerability of admitting he loves someone. It's a process, but they get there!!!

11. What’s a song that describes their relationship? Or, what’s the song that they’ve deemed “their” song?

I'm gonna go ahead and link the entire Spotify playlist [or Youtube], because it took me forever to pick singular song

No Guilt by IRONTOM is one that means So Much To Me, because the only reason they learned to love each other is through humanity and reconciling their differences - and maybe learning that they aren't so different after all. Their relationship isn't just the two of them, it's the culmination of what their friends, the humans that were once so beneath them, taught them about love.

16. What’s their favorite “domestic bliss” moment? Do they cook/clean together? Do they like to go out shopping together?

Their interests don't intersect very often, but one place they do find they agree is art! Justice plays the harp, and Pride gets introduced to painting through his friend Dante. Once they throw down a tarp (because Pride intends to make a mess, always), I like to imagine them hanging out in the living room together, Justice playing music while Pride slaps some paint around.

18. What does a date night out look like for them?

It depends who picked the activity. Justice goes for traditional date night activities -- dinner, movie, some sort of Out On The Town activity they can do together. For Pride, his second and third options are drinking and/or clubbing, but his favorite thing in the world is Bad Movie Night, where he torments Justice with the worst movies he can find. Their "winning" worst movie night ever is The VelociPastor.

28. What’s something that reminds them of their partner(s)? Do they have anything on them daily as a reminder (a photo, phone background, tattoo, clothing/accessory, etc)?

Pride is a clothing thief, so he is more often than not wearing something that was Justice's in the first place. This is especially true on Sunday, when he's at church for most of the morning and into the afternoon.

For Justice, is it usually the bite marks.

30. Free space! Say something about this ship that you want to say!

It should be noted that I am insane about them, and that I am never not thinking about them.

One thing I'm glad I did was lean into the sex/kink aspect of their relationship, because I was really on the fence about including it at the beginning. But it's become such an important part of their characterizations and relationship as whole that I can't imagine not having it now. It's not just sex because hot (although yes), it's METAPHORS. It DEEPENS how you understand them, because now you know the things they want most and are only willing to share with each other.

[send me a ship ask!]

[coffeelovesdramasalatte]

LITA Ep. 4 Rewatch Thoughts Pt. 1

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

Alright friends, we've finally made it to THEE episode! Definitely grab some water for this one, you're gonna need it.

Sang along to the intro's chorus and it's a banger as usual. The recap felt shorter this time, likely so they could get to the good stuff faster. My last post was super long so no need to go over content again here, but I'm glad they included my favorite shots of Phayu holding Rain in the recap as a little treat.

This episode opens with P'Saifah doing some accounts for the shop - always a good time to see him! I'm still so happy that he knew to call Phayu as soon as he saw Rain standing there all drenched and sad. I also love that he's already accepted Rain as Phayu's person (so cute!). Phayu says here that Rain hasn't eaten since yesterday, which implies his last meal was when they went out together. I'm not sure if there's a special meaning behind it, but it is interesting that they're having dinner together twice in a row under such different contexts. Since last time, we've learned that Phayu is emotionally invested in Rain beyond simple liking (as demonstrated by how he treated and cared for Rain during a vulnerable moment).

I continue to love how they namedrop P'Pakin without showing us who he is. I, for one, would really like to put a face to the name of the all-powerful big boss. Especially bc he's clearly a PhayuRain shipper like the rest of us (evidenced by him encouraging Phayu to bring his naughty boy to the next race). Yay P'Pakin!

Phayu's face goes through a series of microexpressions here which really cemented Boss' amazing acting skills. You can tell he considers taking Rain for all of one moment before he thinks it through and remembers that he's teaching Rain to be more responsible and that he can't distract him with illegal street racing. I picked this screenshot for the pretty lighting and the subtle furrowed-brow.

Listen, I've said this 1000 times and I'll say it a 1000 times more before this set of posts is over. NOEUL IS TOO CUTE it's not fair no one should be this adorable when eating ramen

Phayu will really take ANY excuse to touch Rain's lips, won't he. I think we're at 4 lip touches so far in the series? I'm loving the bisexual lighting in the background too. Stellar shot

Ok if Phayu is Rain's codeline senior (shoutout to @atrioofinsomniacfoxes for telling me what this means), I'm sure he already has basic info like Rain's age in his permanent memory. Which means the line about him not dating underage people was either meant to reassure the audience he's got morals (which I don't think any of us ever doubted) or so he could get Rain to admit he wanted a kiss (which is mean bc then he withholds said kiss). Rain looks so smug here though when he helpfully reminds Phayu they already kissed

This is so aesthetic to me. The light from above, the hand placement, the absolutely content look on Rain's face. All perfect. I also love how Phayu gently strokes Rain's face before moving in - again, these two do small gestures extremely well that makes the couple believable. The way Phayu has his eyes closed too makes me wonder if he actually wanted to kiss Rain here, but then decides in the end to hold back in order to not be a distraction to Rain.

I can't get over how happy Rain looks to be where he is. I'm in unanimous agreement, Rain.

But then poor bby, Phayu throws cold water in his face when he tells him Rain shouldn't come to the garage anymore. The quick mood change is masterfully sold by Noeul's brow-furrows and parted lips. I also like the frantic eye contact he makes with Phayu here.

Rain's immediate reaction to Phayu telling him not to come is that he's sorry he's annoying. That's so sad, because it sounds like someone must have told him that in the past and it must have hurt quite badly for him to think that's the reason right away.

I feel like Phayu thinks similarly, and is not a fan of Rain thinking this way because he turns his head and breaks eye contact. He only looks back when he starts explaining to Rain that no, it's not because he's annoyed or doesn't want Rain around, but it's just that he wants Rain to be more responsible. I really like how Phayu phrases things in this conversation because it shows how seriously he's taking Rain and their potential relationship. Very mature on Phayu's part.

But then he immediately follows up this decree with a headpat/caress! He wants Rain to follow through on this relationship and he's relaying that through touch!! I found it very interesting that Phayu chose to drag his fingers along Rain's face instead of his hair, which is where he usually does it.

And Rain, our impulsive and rather in-love son, immediately is like Mission Accepted ft. death-grip on Phayu number 5

I couldn't get a clear shot of it, but Phayu's fingers appeared to twitch as he was pulling away from Rain, showing his reluctance to leave. Some very subtle but masterful acting from Boss (or maybe it's just that Noeul is like a Boss hand magnet so it was just nature running its course, or maybe it's both).

Finally we get the title of the episode, which is Warm Me with Your Heart. Well, I think Rain and Phayu warm up more than just their hearts in this one, just saying...

Fruity siblings alert! P' Som is actually a good brother and upperclassman for checking in on his sister's work and her friends.

Leave him alone P' Som, he's going through Phayu-withdrawals. I really like how they styled Noeul's hair in this scene! The bangs are so pretty!

Thank you to P'Som for sharing this absolutely devastating burn. I'm going to use it on someone someday:

Also life advice I really need to take LMAO I'm so bad at waking up on time:

Wait something super yellow-blue is happening here but I'm not sure what it is... Ok so far we've had yellow blue primarily with scenes containing just Rain and Phayu in focus, but this is the first one I'm noticing where it's so apparent but Phayu isn't present. However, the blue in this scene (mostly P' Som's overshirt) is a lighter blue whereas Phayu's blue is more navy. Maybe by the end of this post series I'll have figured out what it means??

Wait the siblings do really be fruity - P' Som is wearing rainbow tie-die so true of him

I love how Rain has dropped his crush on Ple like a bag of potatoes. Boy simply does NOT care, and Sky notices within 0.2 seconds. He's a really perceptive friend for being able to tell Rain likes Phayu before Rain is willing to admit it, and that Rain's not upset over the teacher's remarks but for a different problem. He also tells Rain to look inside his heart (a.k.a. to be true to himself). Can anyone tell me what Rain's shirt says in this scene? Because now I'm seeing that it's dark blue and the text is literally right over his heart so it could be important.

Sky immediately getting goosebumps after he was sensitive to his friend PLS Sky you don't have to pretend you're not the world's second biggest softie when it comes to Rain (beaten only by Phayu).

Ok this is cool - Rain's reflecting on his feelings while staring at his reflection in the phone screen, similar to how he was reflecting while looking at the mirror in the last episode!

Then we get a montage of Rain working hard and looking rather forlorn. He does ignore Ple once more which is an indication to us that he's moved past that crush completely. I also like that they made Ple such a nice person without making her romantically like Rain. She's cool!

Also they used my single-braincell'ed other son, Sig, and his friend to show us something else yellow-blue. I can't not include this shot bc how the heck was Sig comfortably snoozing like this? I want a series about the adventures of Sig.

After we see Rain working hard but still looking at his devoid-of-messages phone, we cut to an equally forlorn-looking Phayu. The man clearly wants to message Rain but is holding himself back. insert dreamy sigh (not even from me, Phayu literally sighs so hard right here that his coworker notices)

HE SAYS YET!! Y'all I can't get over how sure Phayu was that Rain was going to be responsible and then be his

I find it interesting that everything the other person said was a problem in his relationship is what Phayu wanted Rain to say because it would have shown responsibility.

I also like that when asked if they broke up, Phayu says it's not like that before deflecting. I always found it infuriating in dramas when people are like "I'm going to straight up reject you even though I like you for your own good". Here, Phayu didn't say they would never date, or even that he doesn't like Rain. He has made his interest abundantly clear and is just waiting for Rain to mature a bit. We love healthy communication and goal setting in this house!

Ok I'm going to say it again: I LOVE Sky as Rain's BFF. He is so perceptive and nonjudgmental and a great listener and I'm so happy we got to see his story in the latter part of the show.

Oh sweetheart, do I have news for you...

Next we get cupid-Sky saying that he never meant it when he told Rain he's annoying, and that he rather likes this side of Rain. This one statement is enough to light a whole fire under Rain and our boy is back in business.

Note to self: Can get friend-counseling services from Sky for ice cream (he looks so cute here like he knows he did a good job and also he's imagining how much trouble he just sent Phayu's way)

In the next scene, we cut directly to Rain showing up at the garage all excited to work, and Phayu completely ignores him as he walks by. It must have taken every ounce of Phayu's strength to do that bc Rain is looking mighty adorable right here. Yay we see P'Aon and the other employee! I can't recall her name so I'll call her Khun Suay from now on. Neither of them want to disappoint Rain so they have to argue over who tells Rain he can't set foot in the office. Rain is undeterred though, our stubborn son. He's an engineer y'know - he can solve his own problems.

I do love all the little details they put into this show - they just told us it was super hot outside but now we see it too with Rain's sweat.

Phayu, no longer able to tolerate seeing his boy toiling outdoors, comes to check in. Rain is here to complete his original plan of attack, which is to show up in front of Phayu every day until Phayu falls in love. But now he's also fulfilling Phayu's demands of being more responsible. Good for him.

The way they filmed Phayu here is interesting, bc he's on the far end of the screen rather than the middle. It could just be for some variance in shots, but it also does make it look like he's closer to Rain's side than he physically is.

Their convo can be summed up as follows:

Phayu: Why are you here? You should be studying.

Rain: I AM studying. Here.

Phayu: You're an eyesore (you should be inside somewhere safe and cool and away from my cracking self control).

Rain: But I wanted to see YOU.

Phayu: Ok nvm forget everything I said - how much work do you have and in what ways can I help without making it obvious I'm helping?

Rain's logic >>>>>>>>>>>

Rain knows he's won ahhhh what a smug cutie!

To Rain's credit, he does get back to work as soon as Phayu leaves.

Ok we're not even halfway through this episode and I already hit the max number of images so there'll probably be three parts to this (sorry in advance but I don't think anyone's gonna complain about the copious screenshots to come of Those Scenes) (This author's note is coming after I finished all the parts - I was so wrong, there are now 5 parts and y'all can thank my lack of impulse control for that)

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6