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nicolascasillas · 4 years ago

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blessedly unholy, here comes a nicolas reboot that you (probably, maybe) didn’t see coming from a mile away. devilishly pretty and a collector of hearts, here he is, my sinister son: Nicolas Casillas

no one knows he isn’t actually a Casillas by blood, though, and even if he’s the ‘eldest of three’ he won’t be inheriting the Casillas Winery. Saluti! i hope everyone loves some wine and aggressive business takeovers a la scorned men.

alexa, play: the neighbourhood // BIOGRAPHY

GENERAL INFO

Full Name: Nicolas Maximiano Casillas

Nickname(s): Nic, Nico

Age: 35

Date of Birth: February 16, 1985

Zodiac Sign: Aquarius

Place of Birth: Marbella, Spain

Current Residence: Crescent Harbor, WA

Nationality: American

Gender: male

Sexual Orientation: bisexual

Religion: Roman Catholic upbringing, non-practicing

Occupation: Director of Winemaking at Casillas Winery

Languages: Spanish, English, French, Italian, Swiss German

PERSONALITY

Positive Traits: innovative, patient, charming, gracious

Negative Traits:faithless, strong-willed, treacherous, slight perfectionist

Hobbies: traveling, wine-tasting, watch collecting, watching old movies, yoga/meditation, chess, boxing, swimming, horseback riding

Likes: old Hollywood, James Bond, his pet cat Lorenzo, The Art of War, crime shows, philosophy books, healthy eating/cooking

Dislikes: carbonated drinks, fast food, blue pens, light brown leather shoes, hair pomade that makes his hair too shiny, going unshaven

Enneagram: Type 8

Temperament: Choleric

Myers- Briggs: TBD

Moral Alignment: Lawful evil.

ABOUT:

TRIGGERS: pregnancy, miscarriage, parental death, adoption

— Secretly adopted by Victor and Elena Casillas and brought to Crescent Harbor just shy of his second birthday. His birth mother, Lucia, was a struggling, recently-widowed florist. When Elena and Victor had happened across her shop months after another (secret) miscarriage, they came across Lucia in her shop, spied the photo of her deceased husband that resembled Victor, and hatched a plan of adoption. The infant Nico was the same age as Elena’s child would have been.

— They bought Lucia’s silence, and the only people that know that Nicolas isn’t their biological son is their legal counsel and those involved with the adoption process.

— Spoiled is an understatement. He was given the best of the best, indulged to the highest degree as the “Only Child” of the head of the Casillas family.

— RIP, after years of not actively trying, Elena was able to carry to term not one child, but two children.

— He was ten years old when he was sent away to boarding school in Switzerland, and a confused and hurt Nico put his best foot forward, excelling academically and athletically. He also managed to network with the children of the most influential people in the world. If he couldn’t win over the hearts of his parents and keep it, he would instead collect the hearts of all others.

— Although Nicolas came home every summer and holiday season, called his parents nearly every weekend (and between then, wrote letters of his progress), the distance continued to grow. The before he left for university, when he finally had the courage to ask why it felt like his mother and father had iced him out of their lives, they told him the cruel truth.

—“You are not a Casillas, Nicolas. You’ll never be in charge of the winery and its fields.”

— He was not a Casillas, no matter how beloved. But because of the way they had gone about things, they had to keep the truth a secret— Victor Casillas was too proud to admit that he and Elena had resorted to a secret adoption and had deceived the world. The idea of a scandal dirtying the Casillas name was too much for Victor or Elena to bear.

— They offered Nicolas a contract: hide the truth, relinquish your assumed birthright to the Casillas CEO-ship, and he would be compensated with the appointment as Director of Winemaking once he graduated from university, would not lose out on the inheritance owed to him as a Casillas, and lastly, be given the information needed to contact his birth mother. He signed it, broken hearted with unidentified emotions running through him.

— He spent the next few years at a university in Italy, then another three years in France after he graduated as he recovered from the revelation of his parentage before returning to Crescent Harbor. He learned everything he could, created a name for himself in a life abroad, garnered their love and trust with a hunger that could not be sated.

— He also sought out his birth-mother, who hurriedly slammed the door in his face. She had another family, she wanted to keep her yearly stipend. Nicolas was unwanted.

— In accepting the distance between himself and his adoptive parents, Nicolas inadvertently created a rift between himself and the twins— they call it abandonment, he calls it self-preservation.

— And in a supposed show of love, he came back once he was twenty-eight announced at the Casillas holiday celebration that he would be relinquishing the future ownership of the winery to his younger brother. Just as promised.

— Technically, Nicolas loves his position as director of winemaking, spending more time in the vineyards than having to wear a stuffy suit and talk business all day. But, he isn’t satisfied. He knows, as well as Victor does, that he would be a better head of the business one day in comparison to his son. Elena knows how deeply he’s been hurt, but her love for her biological children trumps the love she has for the child she’d brought home all those years ago.

— He’s biding his time, collecting hearts and the support of those powerful and continues to be beloved within the community to eventually pull them to his side, planning to take the company one day from his younger sibling.

— He may not have Casillas blood, but he’s here to stay.

— Be warned: Nicolas Casillas is a monster, no matter how beloved. He’s as ruthless and ambitious as the people who raised him, too.

AESTHETIC

Creed Aventus / three michelin star restaurants / early mornings and late nights / twinkling eyes / mulberry and cedar / well-tailored suits / warmth of a fire / gilded entryways / someone you’ve known forever / knit sweaters / a perpetual smile / old leather briefcase / wine / a watch glinting in the light / a wolfish grin / hair pomade / chocolate fondue / smoke-filled rooms / distant laughter

#pregnancy tw #miscarriage tw #parent death tw #adoption tw #— nicolasmcasillas. intro

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thegranfathertree · 7 years ago

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The Red String: Yumes Waking Nightmare

My first posted story as well as fist resus story. Since I tend to be descriptive I’m unsure how long this maybe. Hope you enjoy. Yume grew up in New York City. At age of 21, she’s had been living on the streets for the last 7 maybe 8 years. She grew up in a strict traditional Japanese household. Her mother she remembered as both very kind and sweet always the model Japanese wife. Her father, a businessman, both hard and stern. A real No Nonsense person in short an asshole. He drove her mother to drink. Something that would end up taking her mother’s life as well when Yume nine. A then few years later he would throw Yume out of the house for braking a vase. It was a stupid thing but she knew her father never loved her. He always wanted a boy, a male child, the carry on the family name and inherit the family business. She tried not to think of him much. She tried to think of her mother even less. To look at her at, most one would think she was in her pre or mid to teens. Her black hair was chopped short, it gave her a boyish look. A look she embraced, do to the little protection it afforded her. She was a stood barely 5 feet in height, if that, with a petite. Both a curse of the Japanese heritage, she often thought. If not for the dirt and grime she might have been called a pretty boy. Life on the streets and being homeless has taken its toll on her body. Often going a week or two at a time without a good meal sometimes two to three days without a bad one left her, with an already small frame thinner still. Malnutrition she thought even stunted her development. Her breast where small almost literally flat and barely visible even without a shirt. It only took a loose t-shirt to hide any visage of femininity. She preferred it that was. It was safer being a boy on the streets rather than a woman. She had spent most of her life on the streets alone until about a year and a half ago. When she meant Karl and Lee. Karl was a tall maybe 6 feet and very Italian looking. He used to be some sort of academic. A professor with some PHD and everything. But never talked about how he ended up on the streets. She suspected hit had to do with a woman. He was soft spoken mostly only when spoken too. Lee on the other hand was to opposite of Karl. Maybe a head shorter then Karl, broad shouldered and stocky. Lee was street kid and hustler who grew up in China town. He tended to be hot headed and impulsive. Something that often rubbed Yume the wrong way. According to him he’s been in the streets his whole life and was a “Big man!” in Chinatown before he meant her. She thought his was full of it. She felt was lucky to have meant them though. She’s been alone for a while it felt good to have someone to look out for her and even care about her, a family. Together they came up with a plan. One that could get off the streets if they could get some scratch, money, together. Lee had been selling his blood to a blood bank. Karl for his part had been selling his sperm apparently there was some demand from white men with PHDs at least that’s what he said. Yume had heard of a drug trial that paid out allot. It was risky but money if money was good. With it could get off the streets. Karl told her in most of these drug trials people are mostly given placebos. So the risk of her taking anything harmful is minimal and Lee agreed. While she trusted them. She had not let them know she was a girl. That was something she still held on to. But knew they would watch out for her, that they had her back. That meant a lot to her. The test was something the called a double blind study they told her at the clinic. She would be given the test medication and not disclose what the effects were supposed to be. Over next few months she would be evaluated at end of each week. At the end of 3 months she’s be paid 6 thousand minus the 25$ a week stipend plus other expenses. According to Karl this clinic as “worked” with the homeless before. Because of that she agreed. After the second week Yume was convinced she gotten a placebo like Karl and Lee told her. She assumed that the blood work and other tests each week were for show. It wasn’t till near the end of the third week she began feel something was wrong. It was then the nightmares began. Some of these nightmares were “normal” enough. But the worst ones, it was like she was waking up but couldn’t move. She could hear everything around her, Lee snoring and Karl mumbling to himself. The first time it happened she thought nothing of it. But then it happened the next night. The third time it happened was the worst. It hot that Friday. Yume leaned up against the side of a building next to the main street. She figured she’d catch quit nap before she went to the clinic. Closing her eyes, she slid down the wall to squat and soon drifted off. “Hey are OK?” she heard a voice ask. She tried to respond but couldn’t move or talk. She felt like she had slid over on her side in an odd balled up position. Panic gripped her. Just the idea of being trapped within your own body was bad enough. To experience it again and again. Yume had never felt so helpless before. “No, no, no!” her mind screamed, “not again! Please wakeup, please, please wake up!” She tried screaming. Hoping maybe Lee or Karl will hear her and wake her up. But the only sound she heard was a moan escaped her own lips. “Hey, hey!” the voice came again, “are you OK?” She could hear a slight urgency in his voice this time. “Karl? Lee? Where are you?” she tried plead. But again she hear soft moan, maybe a mumble. Her panic was increasing. “Wake me up someone please!” she screamed within herself. A hand touch her shoulder gently a first. “Hey!” the voice said once again. “Hey, hey Kid! ARE YOU OK!?” the hands grabbed her shoulder now shook it now more forcibly this time. “YOU OK!?” She could hear the panic starting to build in his voice and it fed her own. “Why won’t I wake up! “ She started to feel her heart pound in her chest. Her breath came harder. She could feel her chin pressed to chest and nose pressed against the ground. “I can’t breathe, I can’t wake up!” Someone lifted her to a sitting position. Her back against the wall. She a large hand cup her face. As another shook her shoulder. “Wake up! I need you to wake up!” “I can’t! Wake me up please!” “Wake up, you can do it!” “I CAN’T! I CAN’T! I CAN’T! HELP ME PLEASE! PLEASE!” her plead echoed within her head. She felt fingers press against her throat. It took this to startled her awake. Her eyes flew open to stare at a pair of narrow green eyes locked own. She gasp! “I’m awake”, she tried the say but her voice was suddenly caught in throat. She couldn’t speak, couldn’t exhale. Her eye widened in fear. She saw the refection of her fear echo in the eyes of the stranger before her. “Are You…?” “I’m AWAKE!” She huff out, “I’m fine, I’m fine!!” she try brushing his hand away but it wouldn’t budge. She felt her face beginning to flush with embarrassment and panic. “It’s ok. It looks like you pass out in the heat.” The voice said with a forced calm. He was a tall man. Probably over 6’ standing and broad shoulder. She’d probably describe him as very American looking. Not in that stereo typical blonde haired valley boy way. But in a way it was hard to really tell his ethnicity. Spanish or Italian. But she was unsure. His skin tan with a broad nose. He had close trimmed beard and brown hair pulled tight against his head, probably in a ponytail. His eyes green in color and narrow, not so much to be called “Asian” looking but enough Lee could hardly be justified in calling him a “round eye”, other than for the sake of being an ass . He had a commanding presence about him. But at the same time none threating. She hated feeling vulnerable and being pity. “I don’t need any help she!” She snapped “Ok!” he smiled but his hands didn’t move from her. “Just a few questions first. So I know you’re okay.” without missing a beat, “What day is today?” “What!?” “What day…?” “Friday!” “Good. How many fingers do you see?” He said removing his digits from her throat and holding them in front of her face. “Two!” she huffed. She felt her face beginning to flush again with embarrassment. “Date of birth?” “May the 5th” “Year?” “96!”“ She instantly curse yourself. As she noticed his eyebrow raised in amusement and a small smile pull at the corner of his lip. “Name?” “Yu!” “Yankees or Mets?” “What does that have do with ANYTHING!!?” She screamed. Yume was doing everything she could barely hold back her tears now. Fear, shame and anger had beating her pride to its core. His rapid fire questions were not helping. “Nothing”, he confesses with a smile “I was just wondering.” She almost lost it right there. Her hands shot up to her mouth, stifling any sound before it could escape. Yume knew if she laughed what would follow. She felt her eyes swelling up. “I’m not going to cry.” she told herself. Yume knew what he was doing and hated it. She hated that he felt he need to comfort her and she hated it more that she welcomed it. She was glad for it and that pissed her off. It was bad enough She felt “weak and helpless”, she thought. She wanted someone to blame, to blame him, to hate him and be angry with him. But she couldn’t. She could see in his eyes he cared. He didn’t know her and he was concerned for her someone he didn’t even know. It was different with Lee and Karl they looked out for each other. But never coddle one another. You always had to “Keep a brave face” never push to close to someone’s emotions. Even if you care, don’t show it. You never show it. The streets could take anyone at any time. You had to be strong. She always had trouble with that. This man he did care and she hated it too. She hated the look of concern he gave her. If he was just being nice it would be different. The fact he was concerned for her, reminded her of something that she once had in another life. A distant memory best left forgotten. It meant she was weak. It reminded her of something, she knew never have again. Unconsciously she began nervously tugging at her pinky finger. “Mets.”, she mumbled. Answering to spite herself. He smiles, then his face became very stern. “This could have been much worse.” He said gravely. The tone of his voice and the intensity in his eyes, raised a panic within her. Before she could ask…. “You could have been a Sox fan” She hope the sound that escaped her lips sounded more like a laugh to the stranger. Then it did as a sob to her own ears. Though in reality it was a combination of both. Yume was at final limit. Between the nightmares and now this. She didn’t want to lose her shit in front of this guy but couldn’t bring herself to push him away either. She hated she didn’t want too. “Drink some water.” He offered producing a bottle of water, from the backpacking he wore. She took the water without thinking. Normally she’d refuse a handout. But it was the distraction she needed. Plus she was very hot and thirsty. It had been at least a day since she last drank anything. The water was cold too. So very cold, it felt good going down her throat. She notice he was pouring water on to a paper towel. From another bottle this one green, that he produced from his backpack. Folding the wet towel “Here.”, he offered reaching over to her. Startled she thought he was going to wipe off her face and moved her hand to stop him then… “AH! COLD!” she stiffened briefly as he placed the towel on the back of her neck. “Sorry”, he apologized, “I should have given you some warning.” “God it feels good.” she begrudgingly admitted to herself once she got over the initial shock. She took a few more sips from the bottle. She found herself relaxing finally. He was doing everything his best to keep his face neutral. She noticed but she could see the relief in his eyes. She took some comfort in that look. But it also filled a part of her with an emptiness. A longing for something she knew she’d never have. “I think you’re probably suffering from a bit of heat exhaustion. Probably some dehydration as well.” He smiled at her warmly. With a simple smile he pulled on the thread of the memory Yume thought forgotten. She felt a pang of sadness shot through her. He noticed it too she knew, but to his credit he hid it well and did not press her one it. “Listen”, he said is voice serious again, “when I found you, you are burning up and your pulse was very high. If you can? I think you should take it easy for the next few moments maybe find some shade. Do you have someone looking out for you? Someone I could call?” While simple innocent question. It triggered a panic within and was the opportunity she needed her she needed. “I really have to go.” she finally said out. This was all suddenly becoming way too much for. As she stood up she found him help her to her feet. He let her go before she had a chance to protest. “It’s okay.” he soothed Those words alone were enough to begin to calm her down, pissed her off. “I want you to take this”, he said handing her the green water bottle he use earlier. She realized now was filled almost completely with ice. “I don’t want… ” “Keep it!” he insisted cutting her off. “Use some of that ice water on the back of your neck. It will help to keep you cool.” She try to act tough and knew she needed make her escape, “Yeah man whatever.” She said, taking the bottle as she began to walk away. He saw through the act immediately she notice. For brief moment she thought he would burst out in laughter. He composed himself quickly, her benefit and she realized. Allowing her to keep some face. “I’m Mitch by the way”, he called after she had gotten two steps from him. She saw his hand with extended open to her. “Damn it”, she curse to herself, “Why did you have to tell me your name? Why couldn’t you just let yourself be some Friendly Stranger on the street? The kind face to maybe be remembered in passing. Someone to be forgotten. Not now, now you have a name.” the thought to herself. Of course he was not the first person or man to show her kindness. It was different when it came from someone who didn’t live in the streets. Someone who had a home to go to. Someone that didn’t have to worry about whether they were going to be able to eat in the morning or even that week. Their kindness is where normally filled with pity or self-gratification. But when they actually cared as he did. It was so much worse. Worse for her. It was the only time she felt truly worthless. Her father’s words would come back to her. In her head she could hear his voice chastising her. “You ungrateful child! You lack respect! You are worthless and lack gratitude. “ She felt that emptiness in the pit of her stomach again. It stopped her in her tracks. It wasn’t just that she could tell Mitch’s concern was real. But there’s something else about him as well. Something she didn’t want think about. Something she knew you probably never have. Tentatively she reach out and shook his hand. She was both embarrassed and ashamed by how tried to treat him and couldn’t bring herself to look at him in the eyes. Standing in front of him she felt so much smaller. Her hands tiny listing his large palms. His grip was strong and firm if he had wished to crush your hand with ease, she had no doubt he. Though he showed no inclination of wishing to do so. “Nice to meet Yu.” Mitch smiled. “Thank you.” she whispered. “Hey, no problem.” He kept his voice up beat. Downplaying the situation like it wasn’t a big deal. It was the warmth in his voice, which caused butterflies begin to fill that empty void within her stomach. She looked up quickly to see that warmth also touched his eyes. “I’m still holding his hand!" she realized, “Why am I still holding his hand?” Then suddenly….. “I’m sorry!” She blurted out. Those butterflies quickly becoming a twisting knot within her gut. “For what?” Mitch almost laughed out loud in surprise. ‘For everything! For causing you so much trouble!” she didn’t know where this was come from. She felt like a child again, standing before her father. Wanting his approval and she couldn’t stop herself. Fortunately for her Mitch did. “Yue!” the firmness with which he spoke her was enough to quiet her. Placing his freehand on her shoulder. He caught her eyes with his own. His stern gaze both demanded her attention and pleaded with her to believe him. “You did nothing wrong. Okay? It’s really hot out here and it just got to yah. There no shame in that. None all. It ok. You you’re ok right?” His face was very close. Her heart began to hammer away in her chest. The thumping of her pulse rang in her ears. Her cheeks grew hot under his gaze. She saw a quick flash of concern in his eyes and was for it. Because it meant he mistook the source of her flushed complexion being do to the heat and not himself. “Are you sure you’re okay?” “Mmm hmm”, she nodded quickly stepping back away from him. This was becoming too much for her. She had taken barely a step away when someone rushed passed her. “What the fucks your problem man!” she heard Lee shout as he slammed in to Mitch only to be tossed off. “You some sicko? Got a thing for little boys!?” recovering he pulled Yume behind raising his hands in front of them like an imitation of some boxer. Lee knew was no kid but didn’t stop him from trying to play that angle. Mitch stood his ground, but didn’t is it raised his hands. His eyes locked on Lees end icy edge his voice, “Oh yeah! I have a thing with them not dying due to heat stroke.” Those words seem to take some of the wind from Lees bluster. “Lee, it’s cool”, Yume protested. “I got overheated and he helped me out. Chill ok!” she looked over, apologetically at Mitch. That seemed to be enough to back Lee down. “You ok?” he said turning her “you need me to get you to the hospital?” he grabbed her on each shoulder as if she was about to toppled over then and there. “I'm fine!” she protested. Lee was never this handsy, even if was concerned. He was playing it up. He confirmed her observation by throwing his arms around shoulder in sideways hug. While she was unable to get mad at Mitch with Lee she was having no problem with Lee. It was a welcome feeling as it distracted her from the other feelings. “Sorry dude. I though you fucking with my boy here.” Lee said giving Yume’s shoulder a squeeze and a rough shake. “There’s always some assholes looking to take advantage of a little kid.” “I get it. You got too look out for family”, Mitch replied sincerely. His eyes remaining skeptical. Lee extend his hand and Mitch took it. Giving each other one of those quick, shoulder check “bro hugs”. Yume knew exactly what Lee was doing. She felt her hearts skip a beat and her chest grew tight. She inhaled sharply her breath lost. As Lee went to pull away, Mitch did not let go, locking his grip on Lees. At the same time stepping forward with his right foot on Lees left rooting him in place. “By the way?” Mitch asked. Smiling kindly. His voice friendly even. Only his eyes betrayed his true Intent. They were like steel burrowing into Lees. “You didn’t by any chance find a wallet did you? Maybe on the sidewalk a moment or so ago?” “Nah man!” Lee lied. “I didn’t see anything. Sorry!” He tried keep his voice calm and play ignorant. But he could tell this man was having none of it. He tried to pull away, but his hand was held in an iron grip. One he was struggling to match. “Are you sure you didn’t come across one, a black LP wallet. I'm pretty sure you couldn’t have missed it” Mitch’s smile never faltered nor did he take his eyes off Lee’s. Yume's heart began to hammer in her chest. At the same time it was as if iron bands began to wrap her chest. She knew Lee could handle himself in a fight. But Mitch was a head taller and at least fifty pounds heavier and just by the way he was handling himself she was sure he could take Lee. If it came it. More than that she didn’t want this. She wanted to scream at Lee to “give the wallet back.”, But she couldn’t speak couldn’t breathe. She stood there paralyzed, afraid of what was going to happen. Seconds seemed to drag on for hours as she watched locked together. The strain began to show in Lee’s face, “OH SHIT REALLY?!”, and his voice. He said. While trying his best to feign surprise, “I did find a black LP wallet! Down the street.” Lee made a great show of producing Mitch’s wallet from his back pocket and handing it over to him across their clasped hands. Mitch accepted the wallet, glancing into it briefly before removing his foot from Lees toes. A smile tugged on the corner of his mouth briefly before he released Lees hand and returning it to his back pocket. “Thanks, very kind of you.” If it was a sword, the edge to Mitch’s sarcasm would have cut Lees head clean off right there. Before Yume could begin to relax. “Yo man, if I didn’t find that. You’d be in the shit. Any chance of a reward?” “FUCK LEE!” she screamed inside her head, “why do you need to push everything?” Mitch was going to deck him, she knew it. She wanted to deck him. Yume didn’t know what angle Lee was playing didn’t care. She wanted him to stop. But she was paralyzed to do anything. Her heart felt like it was about to explode in her chest. Mitch to her surprise didn’t take the swing. Instead he smiled cheerfully. ”You’re absolutely right.” The edge to his voice gone. “You can keep the 20 spot you slipped out,” he offered,” and your teeth.” He smiled as he said that. “By the way, I found this in the ally' he said holding up a ratty beat-up brown wallet and flicking it onto Lees chest. “Maybe you might know find who it belongs too!” Yume coughed out a laugh followed by a coughing fit as she tried to catch her breath. The realization of what Mitch had done broke hold she was under. She wanted to kiss him for it. It was brilliant the thought. Some of the tension in her body began to dissipate until she looked to Lee and the knots in her stomach began to tie again. Lee’s eyes widened in surprise as he fumble to catch wallet. Is face flushed with broken pride and humiliation? He tensed briefly ready to reclaim some of his pride. Then though better of it as he backed away. “Thanks dude,” he forced a smile. “I must have dropped mine too.” Mitch returned the smile. “Lucky break for both of us.” He said dryly. Unlike with herself, any warmth or kindness Mitch’s face held was gone. Yume noted. He looked at Lee as if he was the piece of shit that she now felt like after this. A fear grew within her that he would now look at her that. The look in his eyes full of disgust would be her last memory him. She began tug at her picky finger again nervously. She didn’t want this. “Yu!” She felt as if her heart was going to stop. Part of her wished it would. She hoped she would wake up and this would all be a dream. Yume didn’t want to see the look on Mitch’s face when he looked her now. She tried avoid his gaze. Looking anywhere, everywhere, but at him. Hearing her name on his lips, she couldn’t help herself. “Take care of yourself, Okay.” For that moment it was as if Lee had not arrived. Like he wasn’t there at all. Just Mitch and Yume and the world around them disappeared. She knew it was only in her head but she wanted that moment to last forever. She realized then she was still tugging on pinky and couldn’t bring herself to stop. Instead she just nodded dumbly in response. With his next words the moment was over. “Take care Yu.” He smiled. When he looked back to Lee that smile faded. “You take care of your boy now.” “I don’t need you to tell me my business.” Lee blustered. “Right!” She watched him go to disappear into the city. Yume waited till Mitch was well out of earshot till she turned on Lee. “What the hell was that about?!” she yelled punching Lee’s are. Laughing, “You hit like girl!” he teased. “Fuck You Lee!” she said punching him again. “I sorry he looked like an easy mark. Motherfuckers lucky I didn’t kick his ass.” he boasted “You’re lucky he didn’t kick your ass.” She protested. Yume hated him when he was like this. “He was a nice guy! He didn’t deserve your bullshit!” “Yah as if. Why does it even bother you? Those people only act nice. They don’t give a shit about people like us!” Lee shot back. “Those people”, he always used that term against anyone who had even a little more than him or anyone not “us”, she, Karl and Lee. Yume hated that especially now. “People like that asshole ain’t got no respect for us!” “You stole his wallet then had the nerve to ask for a reward! After he busted you and after you lifted a twenty him!” “And that Motherfucker stole my wallet!” he deflected. Sensing where this was going Lee quickly shifted the tact. “When did you start getting into dude anyway?” This earned him another punch. She was glad her face couldn’t get much redder. “Fuck you Lee!” “I don’t know. You where give him some queer boy fuck me eye. Blushing all over.” He enjoyed needling Yu, unaware he was a she. “I’m not blushing!” she protested. “I'm overheated, I don’t like dudes and I’m piss at your bullshit…” “You know you voice gets all squeaky when you’re angry? Maybe your balls didn’t drop yet” let me check.” He made a mock grab for her crotch. “FUCK OFF LEE!” she screamed batting his hand away. Her chest was hammering and she had enough. She took another swing but this time he dodged and pushed her to the side. “You need fuck chill man! I’m just playing wit'chu. Maybe really are becoming a fag-boy.” As he walked away she heard him call back. “I’m going to go waiting for Kar. You better get your head on straight Yu!” She was glad Lee left. Glad he couldn’t see the tears welling in her eye. Glad he hadn’t noticed how close to the mark his words had come. She hated when he got like this. It was one of the reasons why she let him think she was a dude. Most of all she was glad he didn’t notice how scared she had become when he grabbed for her. It wasn’t discovering she was a girl that frightened her, but what some would do when they did was her greatest fear. She propped her back against the wall and placed the ice bottle to back of her neck. It really did feel good. Closing her eyes allowing her to gain some measure of calm till the pounding in her ears subsided and chest to untighten. Maybe Lee was right? Maybe she did need to get her head on straight? Maybe she should have kissed him and told him she wasn’t a boy? What would he have done? Would have kissed her back? What it like to be kissed? Maybe one day I’ll know? “Her head spun briefly with fanciful daydreams till. “Maybe I should wake the fuck up!” she chastised herself. They was a silly dreams that left her feeling empty inside. She knew she needed to be at the clinic soon and tell them about these nightmares. Hopefully they will give her something to help maybe even let her quit with full pay. At least things couldn’t get any worst, she hoped. Yume spared a quick glance down the street were Mitch disappeared. A part of her hope she’d see him returning and a part of her hated herself for it. Unconsciously she began tugging at her pinky finger once again. …………….. To be continued!!!! (Note from the Author: in case you’re wondering: Where the resus in this resus story its coming trust me. I hope you enjoyed part 1 and will come back for part 2.

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saniilabnews · 5 years ago

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FAQ survey: how do you join the lab?

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How did you learn about Professor Sanii's lab?

I leaned about Professor Sanii's lab by searching through the keck website. I searched for a while, and when I came across his research, I remembered he had given a very engaging Core talk. I then looked through his websites and past works to try to get a better idea about how his lab functions!Sanii told me himself because he was my advisor, but I know a lot of people just talked to former lab membersI learned about Professor Sanii's lab through peers and CMC's Summer Research Program portal. I was applying to the CMC Summer Research fund and was provided with a list of Professors who would be provided funding by CMC and were looking for students to work in their research labs for the summer. Professor Sanii was one of the Professors listed!

How did you initiate contact with Professor Sanii?

I first emailed Professor Sanii with some questions I had about his research. We set up a time to Skype (he was on paternity leave) and further discuss his research! I also contacted former lab members I found on his website to ask for general advice when speaking to a professor about research and how they liked Professor Sanii's lab!emailed to schedule an appt.Professor Sanii was one of the two professors doing science research as a part of CMC's SRP and I emailed him to begin a discussion about working with him in his lab for the summer and onwards. After I saw Professor Sanii was looking for more people in his lab, I emailed him and asked to set up a meeting!

What types of lab or science experience did you have when you entered the lab?

I had some experience in a research lab as a high school student. However, the lab is very inviting to various levels of lab experience! I also entered Sanii's lab the summer after my first year. So my science knowledge was essentially intro bio and intro chem.One year of gen chem labI had worked in a lab at the UCLA Medical School while I was in high school, but despite being used to a lab setting -- prior research experience was much less important in Sanii's lab, as compared to an enthusiasm and preparation to learn and be a part of a collaborative research team. I had no lab experience past the labs I had taken through my courses!

What did you do for summer housing?

For summer housing my first summer, I lived on campus at Scripps! For my second year I lived half the summer at Scripps and the other half house sitting!I commuted from homeI lived at pitzer for half of the summer (which tends to charge the least and allows students from any of the 4Cs to apply for on-campus housing), and am a close friend with a professor who I house-sat for while they were on vacation. I lived in the Senior Apartments at CMC for the summer. They were super nice because I had my own room and shared a bathroom with only one person. I lived with three of my really good friends and we had a nice kitchen and living room too!

How did you navigate funding? Who were your funders?

I was funded by the Johnson Summer Research Grant, which is open to Scripps students. The grant requires summer research be interdisciplinary, even within the sciences! So I was able to write up an essay showcasing the interdisciplinary nature of the lab :) I went through CMC SRP and got help from the career center on how to fill out paperworkI applied for both the CMC Summer Research Stipend (hourly-pay) and the Rose-Hills Scholarship Fund. I received both but ended up choosing to be funded by the Rose Hills Grant because it provided Sanii's lab with some additional funding on top of my individual stipend. I applied through the CMC Research Fund for a 5000 dollar stipend for the semester. I wrote a short application about how I would be using my funding and such and heard back within a month that I had received it!

Why did you choose Professor Sanii's lab?

I chose Professor Sanii's lab because I was really interested in the possibilities it presented. I had never heard of polydimethylsiloxane, but hearing the applications of it was very engaging. I read the lab's 2016 paper and had a lot of questions! Also, after speaking with former lab members, it was evident that Professor Sanii provided a very welcoming and supportive atmosphere, which is something else I was very drawn by!I enjoyed taking his IBC class and the topic of his research seemed interestingProfessor Sanii and I immediately connected really well and I was excited about his research following our very first meeting. Because of this, I did not even consider reaching out to other professors afte hearing about his lab. I chose Professor Sanii's lab because his projects sounded the most interesting to me and we had such a positive meeting. I also reached out to some people in his lab and heard very positive experiences from everyone about the culture and the work. It seemed like the best fit for me!

What was the first day in lab like?

The first day of lab was very welcoming! We all cleaned and familiarized ourselves with the lab as well as spoke about our goals for the summer's research. We also got lunch together and got to know our labmates better!We mostly organized things but everyone was very friendly and we went out to lunch together!Lots of clean up, organization, and getting to know each other:)The first day in lab was a great way to ease into the summer. We spent most of the day organizing/setting up our lab stations so that we would be prepared for the remainder of the 10 weeks. Additionally, we all went out together for lunch!

What was it like preparing and executing the brown bag?

I was extremely nervous for both brown bags (2018 & 2019). However, after presenting and hearing the great questions from the audience, I realized we had successfully communicated our research - which is always gratifying :)It took a couple of days of prep, but I was grateful for the experience of presenting my own research. Prepping for the Brown Bag was very similar to presenting a semester project. Our student research groups each prepared a presentation together, and with guidance and feedback from Sanii -- we presented our ideas, accomplishments, and goals for the summer to other students and professors doing research over the summer. Preparing and executing the brown bag was very doable with my research partners. We all worked on it together as we went along and even practiced in front of all of our lab mates and Professor Sanii to receive feedback before the actual talk!

Was there anything that surprised you about lab? Anything you wish you would have known before joining?

Some days you will spend more time than you want on just getting things to work. But that's okay!! It's part of the process :)I wish I would’ve known how accepting everyone would be, regardless of my age and experience. I was the youngest in the lab, but no one ever treated me like I was less than. I loved the support from everyone in lab. I was surprised by Professor Sanii's hands off method and really appreciated his encouragement that we should all think for ourselves and bring ideas to him. It's very different from a course lab where you are given a strict procedure to follow. There is a lot of room for leeway and creativity in research lab.

What's your biggest take away from your summer of research?

Failure is inevitable, but it's incredibly important to record key information and conditions during a failure, because it always helps to figure out how to improve and move forward. Also, look in the literature!!! It's helpful to familiarize yourself with the field and often times key in problem solving. Time management is key! I learned how to maximize the use of my time and how to prioritize projects. I think doing research in Professor Sanii's lab, specifically, not only verses students in research, but allows them another way to learn about the scientific community, helps build collaboration skills, and fosters closer relationships to professors and students in Keck between the three schools. After finishing research at this summer, I definitely have a new view of Keck as a community I am a part of, a feeling which became much stronger as a result of my summer experience. My biggest take away from my research this summer was definitely that there are many differences between course labs and research labs. You learn a lot of very valuable technical skills and knowledge in course labs. But, when you are in a research lab, you have to learn to adjust to the fact that you are not always going to know what to do and you have to come up with a plan for things you might try based on logic as well as safety.

Your fondest memory/most frustrating moment?

Fondest memory is playing with dry ice and soap with the lab :)My fondest memory was playing with dry ice with my lab mates while listening to “ice ice baby” ;)I just think it is important to remember that research involves a lot of trial and error, so be prepared to try things that often don't work out! A lot of times failing is as telling in research as succeeding in obtaining the result you expected. Fondest memory is definitely going to a UCLA conference with all my lab mates, going out to dinner together, and staying in an airbnb. It was a great end to a very productive summer!!!

Any last comments? :)

Join the lab!!!!! :)Join Sanii’s lab! It’s the best! If you are unsure about research, reach out to students that have done it!!! We are so so happy to help!

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