#then back for another week. I guess
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I hate being an adult
#Luna rambles#I’m so stressed my hands have started shaking again#I’m breaking out and I keep getting mystery bruises#my hair is all dull and im worried it’s starting to fall out#I look like death#I need sleeping pills to sleep and caffeine pills to wake up for my night shift#it’s just for a week. just. a week. and then. two weeks of bliss#then back for another week. I guess#I hate moving I hate change I hate my GODDAMN DOG JUST STARING AT ME AND DROOLING#and my roommate scratched my cookware#but that’s a secret#taking a moment to cry#venting
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"sleeper agent" this and "the brainrot returned" that. those robots have had me by the throat since 2021 and they aren't letting go
#muzz mumbles#this is /lh by the way#i just think it's funny how many posts i see from people who briefly dipped out#only to come back a few weeks/months later like ''guess who has dca brainrot again''#''hey guys my dca sleeper agent was poked''#like hey buddy welcome back. did you enjoy your time out in the fields?#i wrote another story while you were gone#yeah it's about moon fnaf again. yeah.
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Return date for my webcomic, Time and Time Again!
It's been set for a while but sometimes they change the date without warning, so I'll keep you updated if anything changes!
I'm extremely proud of the work I've been doing on it, I can't wait to share everything!
See you then!
#i still have to finish book 4#soooo iiiiiii will do that... this week...#really trying to be done with it but this one is taking so long for all the changes!#hoping to have an update on that soon too#might have taken on a few too many projects#but yay! return!#yippee!!!#i would say sorry its been so long but theres no way it could have been shorter and other people are gone way longer#i tried to leave things on a nice note so itd only be missed for wanting more#and not missed for feeling abandoned#ok! time to get up for another day of work! really need some things off my list so my days can be like.#9/10 hours instead of 12 LOL#im so tired. im legitimately extremely overworked it's a problem#ok bye back to work for me#return#hiatus stuff#time and time again#announcement#use this post to talk about how excited you are and make guesses and shower me with praise :-)[-[#LMAO
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I HAD A VISION
can u draw Octavius finding Jed hiding in a room secretly practicing Latin on duolingo
*ba-bling ✅!”
“Hm?”
…
“Jed? What-“
*in very bad accent* “duo viri domi habitant 🤠”
“Jed.”
“AAH-“
*Ba-boom. ❌*
No pressure obviously lol
Taking your word about the duolingo sounds here
#if you can guess what reference i used for Jed's pose in the last one you. uhh. don't really get anything but it would be cool#also don't worry. no pressure but unfortunately I won't be home to draw requests for a while#maybe I'll be back for a week before July ends and then I'll be gone again#I'll keep ya'll informed#ask#answered#not anon#night at the museum#natm#natm octavius#natm jedediah#jedediah#gaius octavius#octavius#jedediah smith#jedediah and octavius#jedtavius#duolingo#art#fanart#traditional art#accidentally posted this first when there was another ask that was 'older' but it's ok. I'll post tge other one later today#comic
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A few of my Splatoon attacks (Splattacks?) this year!
Characters: @antzinha | @semisentientseafood | @rassicas | @apatheticrobots | @bunnybrainrot
#dodo art#idk why tumblr isnt letting me tag but alas#splatoon#back to minecraft i go for another week. i guess.
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”Damn I’ve been feeling kind of shitty about what I went through when I was 15-16. I wonder if there’s a way to get all these feelings out besides therapy”
SpottedLeaf and Anya:
#blimbo rambles#wc#Crazy as hell to me that the game came out when it did because that was right when I had a feeling I was about to get sent into another#depressive ass spiral for weeks on end over that whole shitty internet thing (again)#I don't carry the same Kinds of mental weight/trauma that these two characters hold - and I know Spotted's whole thing was handled poorly#with her story not even trying to be about grooming according to Victoria Holmes- but something about their characters just#made me feel. I dunno how to explain this but not alone I guess?#Definitely not the right explanation#Basically I'm just trying to say that it's so crazy how quickly these two characters have become really important to me#as embarrassing as that is to admit it's true#again. the game came out RIGHT when I felt one of the depressive episodes coming back. Course I got a lot on my mind when my#birthday was lose. Sure as hell got a lot on my mind now that I'm 19. Not oversharing about that though#But I dunno man. Just feels nice to explore topics of trauma and ptsd with these two (Even if I do more so with Spotted but that's because#I don't really want to draw people much and also I get embarrassed drawing human fanart)#anyways how do I end these tags off#Uh. Alright these two characters are now apart of my “Important Characters I project onto” shelf right next to Smudge
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shuake week day 2 - new game plus
plus, bonus!
#shuake week 2023#oof my art i guess#persona 5#goro akechi#akira kurusu#shuake#this is soooooooo incredibly silly goofy#there was this one post floating around on Twitter abt how akira had a matching pair of gloves when he did ng+#and I went “ok but make it bigger#and like it’s silly yes but it’s also the tragedy of repeating the same events with the hope that they’ll turn out differently#until you’re physically overwhelmed with the reminder that no matter what you do you cannot change the fate of the person you love#idk I’m Crazy abt them dude#the angst spawned out of nowhere tbh she was a last minute addition#also this whole thing is kinda sketchy and rough but like I work full time during the summer#and I think I’d explode if I was dropping a fully rendered piece every day#so here we are#still a fun silly time regardless I hope!!#if all goes well I’ll be back tomorrow with another :))
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irl camp is getting SERIOUS now, as we are entering lategame… which means: 🥁🥁🥁 new outfit for john wizard!!!
#seathan#dnd#dungeons and dragons#my art#my finished stuff#EVERYONE BE HMKIND PLEASE… 🙈🙈🙈#honestly this is diff from the thani one cuz like#its (mostly) the same color scheme i just adjusted like… where they’re blocked out. i guess. not sure how to describe it#i have another two refs coming up soon… maybe. but i wanna go back to practicing for waterfowls this week rahhh#and also i have classes. But thats less important…#my ocs#my references
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ARE YOU SERIOUS???
#BLEACH SPOILERS#swan reads bleach#OKAY SO THEY SHUFFLED A LOT OF STUFF AROUND I WOUND UP READING ABOUT TWO CHAPTERS BECAUSE OF HOW THIS WAS REORDERED#AND I FORGOT THIS PANEL#I FORGOT THIS MOMENT#NEXT WEEK IS GONNA RULE TOO#HIYORI#SARUGAKI HIYORI#ANOTHER OF MY BABIES#GUESS WHO IS BACK#also hopefully we keep Nanao vs Zaraki#need it#NEED. IT.
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the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍
#struggling to tolerate this one ngl its fucking dire this weekend. i just cant do this man#thr things i would fucking do for attention please. just one person to notice and care in the slighest i feel like im losing my fucking#mind out here how does every single person who has ever mattered to me in my lifr see me in distress and choose to ignore it or maybe they#dont even recognise im ij distress in the first place i dont know whats worse i dont think i hide it well at all im just so done#listen like ultimately its fucking fine. i will get myself through it like ive gotten myself through everything else in my fuckijg life#i dont even feel bad that often these days im doing so so so much better and its so much more tolerable to only have to deal with this#once or twice a week instead of it being a struggle every single day like i dont think i could go back to feeling like that again ever i#dont know how i managed to get througyh it before jesus fucking christ. but i can deal with it i can deal with this#ik ill feel fine tomorrow. its just thr fact im so desperately fucking alone with it that makes it so much worse than it has to be#i fucking hate repression i hate being so incapable of expressing myself that its easier for me to injure myself than it is to talk about#how i feel to anyone i hate being trapped in this stupif fucking torture labyrinth and not knowing how to get out of it and never being#given a single avenue anything to hold onto i hate having to do it alone every single fucking time and when i do try i just freeze out#entirely i cant form a coherent thought my brain enters total fucking shutdown pure static white noise fuzz and i dont know why please#its so unfair i dont think its that much to want a little comfort. just once just for someone to stay with me while i cry it doesnt have#to be more than that i just dont want to be alone like this i just want to feel safe around someone just close to someone just once#and well ill survive without it bc i always have i guess. so far at least. and there are many things im grateful for and i do in general#feel pretty okay my life is pretty good at times even. i feel so pathetic and stupid and ashamed for even feeling like this#but do i have to go my entire life without ever experiencing any kind of real intimacy with another person emotionally that is#i mean physical is nice too and they go hand in hand in some ways but i just want to feel seen and safe over anything.im tired#i feel like i try.but not hard enough i know its all my fault really but i dont know how to try any harder but nothing will ever change if#i dont i cant expect anyone to do anything if i cant rven communicate in thr first place. oh i dont want to think about it anymore#i have a headache from crhing and its not even 8pm ugh. okay. well it is what it is.#ill breathe until i calm down and then tidy up whatever i left in the kitchen and get my work stuff ready for tmr#and polish my boots maybe. and read and go to bed at 9:30 i think. and ill feel fine in the morning#my fault for thinking about it earlier i know i shouldve nipped it earlier on its such an easy spiral to fall into i need to get better#it happens. okay anyway. no cause for concern im good guys. weakly thumbs up at the camera all covered in blood#my period is late actually thats probably all this is lmao. makes sense thinking abt it#cant wait for it to finally start and all earthly desire to leave my body so i never experience pain again amen#.vent#ignore this sorry for being mentally ill im not even that mentally ill anymore so no excuse rly ummmm. bit embarrassing innit.
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~
#delete later#another journal entry 📝 for the void#i have not been sleeping well for the past 2 wks 😵💫 i always wake up like clockwork after 5-6 hrs which feels like not nearly enough#i feel like i've done everything there is to do (consistent exercise + consistent sleep times + earplugs + weighted blanket + no caffeine)#last night i took melatonin too but no... same problem staying asleep 😭#ahh whatever. i'm just frustrated that it has to be this way :(#anyways in an act of spite i reread like the 4 wips that have been sitting in my drafts from the past few weeks#i think something that will never cease to surprise me about writing is that more effort/time doesn't necessarily translate to better#results; i suppose that's the case with all kinds of art but#it does feel somewhat unintuitive. one of my fav professors in uni said to not dismiss those 'lightning in a bottle' moments (in art) as#blind luck... but to instead analyze the circumstances and iterate on recreating them. and i think one of my artist friends who i deeply#respect said something similar (wrt artistic rituals/setup). i have too many thoughts on writing and on my own creative processes and#weaknesses to fit into any number of tags here. :') that said...#*shakes ch2 draft* after everything i did and all the hours i spent WHY are you still so bad?!!! D: i am baffled and frustrated.#and why do i prefer this other [redacted] draft which i hammered out with utterly no regard towards the quality??#anyways. back to the drawing board i guess T.T
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I have learnt things about Geto that I wish I could unlearn
#I think I'm getting about the same amount of spoilers as a few weeks ago except now I understand them#But like. I expected so much of him#Seeing gifs of that one scene in which Gojo gets distracted because of Geto almost made me watch this a year ago#Geto was actually my favourite character in that one JJK fanfic I read that I mention so often even if he had literally one scene#I know so much of the emotional turmoil and conflict in JJK and Gojo in particular depends on him#And you're telling me he's Thanos?#I learnt a few days ago that everything pretty much happens in one year. That there's one year between Geto's death and Gojo's#I thought it would be like ten years. Ten years of the act haunting him#But no? So it's not a broken teenager who has these ideas and is killed by another teenager to stop him?#It's a what? ~30yo man saying Light levels of stupidity? Even worse perhaps?#Goodness I hope this is not so. I hope this is better written than what I am seeing#Because goddammit I can't do it. It would kinda ruin every emotional scene from then on?#That one scene I was so looking forwards about patting Gojo's back or whatever. The one in which Gojo gets distracted. It just. I don't know#I won't be able to be moved if Geto doesn't work xD#I was fearing I wasn't going to like him a lot because my expectations were big but oh my god please not like this#This is way worse than I expected. Someone tell me he actually makes sense. What's the point of this whole political play#in which no one is fully wrong and no one is totally right otherwise? What is the point of the haunting. This feels just idiotic xD#And I don't care about the traumas and all that. That works for the teen not the ~30yo man#It would have worked if Gojo would have killed him like 1-2 years after everything not like a few months ago. Last winter#After like ten years a 30yo man should have realised this plan sucks.#Even if it's utilitarian. Who is going to make clothes? Buildings? Streets and railways? Bread??? Go have a talk with Nanami please#We have been told there are not a lot of jujutsu sorcerers. How are you going to fulfill all those needs out of nothing?#And even if it were little by little so the needs could be getting fulfilled little by little too#If you decimate humans won't that cause more curses? I guess he's thinking on the long run but still this plan seems like a mess#I hope it makes more sense than it's looking it will make because of my god this would truly be the last nail on the coffin xD#I am being more and more tempted to get to Utahime and then just drop this. This is breaking my heart xD#It could be soooo good and it always almost is#And then. AND THEN. Abfksbfndbfkan#Jen pick me up. Come solve this. I am scared xD#I talk too much
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it is cozy campfire ronance season
but i am not writing any cozy campfire ronance
i have failed
#might try to rectify this#a few weeks back i was like 'what if i wrote ALL the thriving in the apocalypse pieces'#but that motivation lasted for a very short time#and also there is still just so much i want to do and i don't know exactly how or when to do it#anyway#somewhere in there would have been/will be another cozy campfire ronance piece#but that is still something for the future i suppose#writing things#thriving in the apocalypse#kinda i guess#i also keep wanting to do a ronance advent calendar but i don't have enough ideas for it#life is hard writing is tragic etc etc
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Not sure if you really do asks but I wanted to know; how you do your little comics?
They’re so high quality, with the painterly style and all, and you seem to make so many of them!
my ask policy is i'd like to do em better but generally if i dont reply instantly or have an easy answer i'll let them gather dust in the box and fail to ever get to it
luckily for this one i have an easy way out since i can just point you to the post i made on that a while ago which is pretty much entirely still valid
#replying/reposting for a reminder i guess#still use the exact same pen and brushes & my watercolor tray is still that nasty#this post or another version of it shouild have ended up in an FAQ section that i never got around to make either#extra details huuhhhh idk#uncolored comics backlog is still pretty bad if i dont get back to it efficiently enough i'm at risk of runnin out of colored ones 2 post#due to being day-busy again past few weeks i'm even dealing with a couple comics not having been entirely drawn either#not great not ideal the funk i'm in is still preddy real#eh i'll work it out#bla bla bla
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more scenes that basically everyone sees but pointing out a specific detail i find interesting: "though i hope you don't cause a scene this time" does avery regularly cause scenes at parties?? lmao
#original post#citations#avery#i don't need to maintag any of this this is just for me. a tumblr is a diary first and foremost#i really need to start actually paying attention on avery's dates so i can better understand what her deal is. like i get the gist#but i like to know specifics. which is obvious if you scroll thru this blog for thirty seconds. also she doesn't tell us what her job is!#“businessperson” is vague#it pays enough for her to be a sugar mommy and for (gestures to the post-school helicopter scene) but her actual social standing#seems. unstable. like girlie is NOT secure in her position. i guess this contributes to why i find f!avery more interesting than m!avery#she's very intentionally being shallow and looks-based by toting around this pretty young thing on all these damn Events she gets invited t#and obviously she seeks power over money because if it was just the money she wouldn't bother suger mama-ing us#also. we're not special to her. she finds another young thing if we piss her off too much. like i said it's looks-based it's playing to#the people in power she wants to impress (and subsequently become)#AND DESPITE HER “APPEARANCES ABOVE ALL ELSE” NATURE she has anger issues <3 which obvi looks bad if you're flying into a rage in public!#looks bad if you're being violent towards the pretty thing young enough to be your kid who you're toting around like a trophy!#and back to the subject matter: causing scenes at parties does not endear you to anyone either girlie#she really wants to be one of the wealthy powerful socialites who has everyone under their command but she can't even rein in HERSELF#let alone her orphan of the week. my failwife <3
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Hello everyoneeeee good morning to you all!! Happy Monday my loves it’s the start of a fresh week let’s make the most of it 💕💕💕
#nina rambles~✦#I have a few asks to answer so I’ll do that when I get home from work!!!#I’m also unofficially participating in kinktober#I’m pushing back a Zoro smut to later this week so that it falls in kinktober#and next week I was planning on uploading one thing everyday for laws bday week#and I have 3 smuts in mind for that#maybe more I still have 2 more days to plan out#and I had a swordplay with Zoro in mind#and Halloween smut is on the mind#so like#i guess I’m participating LMAO#I don’t like making those big masterlists though for it because it just pressures me to put it out#meanwhile I have only 2 things written#IDK I just don’t wanna promise something and not deliver ya know????#YA KNOW#anyways#I got another chopper funko over the weekend!!#completing my little wano funko collection#damn this ramble is long that’s enough from me BYE BYE HAVE A GOOD DAY YALL
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