#their ship name makes them sound like two muppets

[xavier616]

"I'm calling the police!"

Re-Animator (1985)

[mangoguy]

Displacement (1/2)

John "Soap" McTavish(2009) x Reader x John "Soap" McTavish(2022)

Warnings: Mention of Modern Warfare 3 (2011), Some fluff, they/them used once other than that no pronouns are used.

You recall your relationship with your John while in the hospital.

Another entry For @glitterypirateduck Soap It Up challenge!

This was heavily inspired by the Multiverse AU by shotmrmiller. It's been on my mind for a while lol

"Right, what the hell kind of name is 'Soap', eh? How'd a muppet like you pass selection?"

You heard Price state, looking up from cleaning your gun you saw the new guy who was set to join. Fresh faced and ready for battle, you wondered how long that would last. You watched as he passed the C.Q.B with a pretty average time, but he passed nonetheless. After that Price quickly briefed the team on the mission, infiltrating and assaulting a cargo ship in the Bering Strait. He dismissed us to get ready, deciding you wanted to try and get to know the new guy. You walked over to him and fell into step with him. 

You remember it wasn’t hard to get him to open up, which was surprising, most of the guys here were not up for much conversion. After a while, you decided to ask the biggest question on your mind, you asked him about his hair. 

“Why did you decide on a mohawk?” You heard him huff.  

“Because it was cool…” He mumbled.

"I love ye, y'know that right?"

You could faintly hear Captain McTavish mumble those words under his breath but the sound of the helicopter made you wonder if you heard it at all. What affirmed that it was indeed said out loud was when he took his hand in yours, rubbing his thumb over the back of your hand in a soothing gesture. Who he was comforting, you weren't sure, but you had an inkling it was to ground himself. 

You recall It was his first mission as captain and if he was nervous he sure as hell didn’t show it. But you knew him, he often sought some small physical contact as comfort when he was nervous. 

It's funny how you remember these things.

You also remember his first mission as captain went off without a hitch, of course, there were hiccups but like he promised nothing happened to you. It was oddly sweet in its own way, he knew you could take care of yourself but he often fretted sometimes (even if he didn't entirely show it).

Another moment you recall with John McTavish was when you two were outside. He was smoking and you were just keeping him company. It was a nice evening, a bit cold but nothing you couldn't handle. You two were talking about anything and everything as you two normally do. Then the topic of living together came up.

"Y'know... I've been thinking after all this is over we need to... do couples things" he chuckled.

"Oh yeah? Like what? I thought fighting in battlefields was good date material," you joked.

"Ah, that's gettin' old... we could get our own place," he suggested. 

"Get our own place? What are you suggesting?" You turned to look at him, he was already looking at you with a grin.

"Aye, I'm sayin' we should live together once this is all over and done with, I'm thinkin' out in the fields near a small town, just the two of us," he stubbed out his smoke before leaning against you. He wrapped an arm around your waist and brought you closer. 

"Hm, that sounds wonderful... We could get a cat... maybe two so the other one wouldn't be lonely," you suggested, planting a kiss on his lips as you both thought about this fantasy. You'll never forget the way his cheeks turned a bit rosy after that. 

Though before house buying the one important thing on John's 'Couples things' list was getting married. Of course, you both talked extensively about it, making sure it was something you both were on the same page on. The ceremony wasn't anything special, just you, John, and a few friends and family to celebrate at John's Parents' house. It was a sweet time, filled with talking and laughing (Ghost and Roach were both raiding the snacks John's mom made). 

"Look at you, my little brother gettin' married! Never thought I see the day, thought you were married to the military life for a sec," John's sister teasingly bumped his shoulder. Though she was teasing, she seemed pretty proud and happy for him. 

"Aye, never thought I get so lucky, knew I wanted to marry them 6 months in but didn't want to scare them," John chuckled while wrapping an arm around your waist. You just rolled your eyes and nudged his rib, and he responded by pinching your hip before kissing your cheek.

But things didn't turn out like you both planned. Luck had to run out someday.

'I won't let anything happen to you,' rings in your head, he never failed to mention it before missions you both went on.

Is that why you were here?

You weren't sure how to explain it. One moment you were with John and Yuri, in that building, something went off and you woke up with someone looming over you.. before it all went black again.

You felt like you were in a different body, and you say that loosely since it still felt like you but a bit younger, less tense. You weakly opened your eyes, the blaring lights of the hospital flooding your vision. You groaned, wincing away for a moment before it felt safe to look again. The bed you were lying on was much softer than the ones back on base.

"Ah, you're awake," you saw a nurse to your left side checking your vitals, she gave you a reassuring smile.

"You were out for a while, almost two months! Had some bloke worried sick about you... Johnny, I think his name was," she started explaining. You never really heard people refer to John as Johnny but whatever at least you knew he was alive.

“Is he okay?” You rushed to ask.

“Yes he’s fine, was discharged a while ago, you were the one to take the most of the damage,” She paused to resume her work.

“Actually he should be coming back soon, doesn’t leave your side unless he needs the restroom, you definitely have a good one,” She chuckled.

Oh, thank god he was okay.

The nurse left you to rest after and you started mulling over what happened.

An explosion happened, you were falling alongside Yuri when it happened. But you couldn't remember much else.

You began to feel uneasy, like you lost a big part of yourself and yet you couldn't explain why. Which was weird considering the nurse just confirmed he was, in fact, relatively okay. While you were mulling it over some more you didn't hear the door opening and the sound of hurried footsteps rushing over to your bed.

"Yer awake!" 

You whipped your head up to see your husband, so grateful he was okay. You were almost ready to jump on him but you froze when your eyes finally landed on him. What looked like John, though he was a mildly younger version of him. He was a bit shorter than your John as well, along with sounding vastly different. 

That was definitely not your John.

He looked worried and relieved at you. Placing a hand on yours but also trying not to hover around you, you noticed a tattoo on his right arm, John didn’t have an arm tattoo. He decided to just sit down on the chair that was pushed near your hospital bed. Not knowing what to do you took your hand out of his and placed it on your stomach. 

That’s when you noticed your simple wedding band was gone.

Replaced with one that had a pearl and a few diamonds.

Whose ring was this?

You were confused and dare you say scared. Scared more than you ever have been in your life and that's saying a lot considering your line of work. But where exactly were you? 

"Yer looking at me like ye don't know me, Bonnie," the man broke the silence. 

But you didn't know him, you assumed this was the bloke the nurse mentioned.

Johnny. 

Wearing the face of your John.

Just what exactly happened?

Words: 1,347

Reblogs and comments are appreciated!

[starleska]

your welcome home oc is so CUTE! i want to know more about them like where did you get inspiration from to create them and like how you come up with such an adorable name like that 😭💖 istg this fandom is so creative and fun

ahhhh oh my goodness this is so nice of you!!!! thank you so much 🙈🙈 it makes my heart really happy that you like Cynthie Scribe so much!!! 🥰

i agree, i absolutely love the wonderful OCs everyone has come up with, they're so inventive 😖 i'm gonna pop this under a read more as i rambled a little - putting waaay too much thought into OCs is a favourite thing to do 😂

oooh, those are some great questions!! i really love making OCs for my favourite characters, and i adore trying to come up with characters who gel well with the canon of that character's universe. for Cynthie, i knew immediately i wanted a writer character, because who better to pair with our beloved puppet artist? 🥴 almost all of my OCs made for shipping purposes have a little bit of me in them, and given how much i've written for Wally, it only felt right to make a fun writer for him :3c

the name actually had a lot of thought put into it 😂 like all of the Welcome Home characters (not counting Home), i gave Cynthie a first and second name, with the first name being a more general, regular name and the surname being applicable to who they are. Wally's a Darling, Poppy's a Patridge, Sally's a Starlet...you get the idea 😉

as for the rest of Cynthie's design, i went through a few different iterations until i settled on something that fit! i already made a Muppets character before (Sagan, who I ship with Dr Bunsen Honeydew 😳) and i didn't want to repeat the colour scheme despite them being very colourful indeed! i usually draw my self-insert self as having green hair, so i used that and went for red skin in line with the kinds of colours that other Welcome Home and Muppets characters have - replicating the contrast Wally has between his yellow skin and blue hair 😉

something i'm interested in is the rhythm of names; about half of the Welcome Home characters have names with two syllables per name (How-dy Pill-ar, Ju-lie Joy-ful, etc.) and the other half have names with one syllable and then two, or vice versa (Frank Frank-ly, Edd-ie Dear, etc.). so when naming Cynthie, i knew i needed a name which fit into one of those rhythms, or it would stick out like a sore thumb! i'd been toying with naming a character Cynthia for quite some time, but that wasn't sitting right...and then it hit me! as far as we know, Wally isn't short for anything, but lots of the Welcome Home characters have names that end with the 'ee' sound (Wally, Julie, Eddie, etc.)...hence, Cynthie Scribe was born! 🔥💖

for the clothes, where Wally is deeply stylish, i wanted Cynthie to have something more haphazard and whimsical - dungarees seemed like a great, practical choice!! those little circles over the straps are actually stickers, which they love to give out to their friends 🥰

now at this point, i felt that Cynthie's design was lacking a little something: i wanted to keep the cute, cropped-and-curvy hair, but felt they needed another distinctive feature. then it hit me - someone like Cynthie likely keeps pens in their hair, always handy to write with!! i finished the design by completing the rainbow and adding the yellows and blues to their outfit, as well as a little heart nose to show off their romantic side :3c

haha, i hope this answers your question!! thank you very much for asking about Cynthie - i hope this is inspiring if you're looking to create your own Welcome Home OC 🥰

[beatriceeagle]

I'm more of a fantasy than sci-fi person, but consider my interest piqued. Why should I watch farscape?

Okay, the thing is, every Farscape fan’s pitch on Why You, Yes You, Should Watch Farscape ends up sounding very similar, and that’s because Farscape is a black hole that sucks you in and does things to your brain, and after you’ve watched it you are never, ever the same, which incidentally is basically the plot of Farscape.

I would summarize the basic plot for you, but that’s work, and luckily, the show’s credits sequence includes a handy summary that I will provide instead of doing that work: “My name is John Crichton, an astronaut. A radiation wave hit, and I got shot through a wormhole. Now I’m lost in some distant part of the universe on a ship, a living ship, full of strange alien life forms. Help me. Listen, please. Is there anybody out there who can hear me? I’m being hunted by an insane military commander. Doing everything I can. I’m just looking for a way home.“

So let me break down that monologue into its component reasons you should watch Farscape.

1) Some of the strange alien life forms are Muppets.

Farscape a co-production with the Jim Henson Company, and while there are many aliens played by humans in make-up, there are also a considerable number (including two of the regular crew) who are Muppets. By which I do not mean Kermit. I mean really gorgeous, elaborate works of art.

Also, even a lot of the humans-in-makeup aliens just look cool, and incredibly weird. Here’s an alien who appears in a single episode of season 1:

Not that there aren’t, you know, occasional Star Trek-style “these guys are just humans with weird hair,” or whatever, but in general, the aliens on Farscape look really alien. And that’s more than an aesthetic choice; it’s Farscape’s driving narrative principle. The aliens look alien, they act alien, they have alien values.

You know how a lot of sci-fi shows will have a stand-in for “fuck,” like Battlestar Galactica has “frak”? Well, Farscape has “frell.” And also “dren.” And yotz, hezmana, mivonks, loomas, tralk, snurch, eema, drannit, dench, biznak, arn, drad, fahrbot, narl. Some of those are swear words, but some of them are just words, never explicitly translated, that the alien characters will pepper into their speech, because, well, why should translator microbes be able to completely translate all the nuances of an alien culture? You’ll pick it up from context. One time, in passing, a character mentions that he’s familiar with the concept of suicide, but there’s no word for it in his language. I cannot emphasize to you enough how fleeting this moment is; the episode is not about suicide, we’re not having a great exchange of cultural ideas—at the time, the characters are running down a corridor in a crisis, as they are about 70 percent of the time—it’s just that the subject got brought up, and this character needed to talk around the fact that he literally didn’t have a word, in that moment. Things like that happen all the time, on Farscape.

Because more than anything else, Farscape is a show about culture shock. John Crichton is this straight, white Southern guy, at the top of his game—he’s an astronaut! he’s incredibly high status!—and then he ends up on the other side of the galaxy, where none of his cultural markers of privilege hold any meaning, where he doesn’t know the rules, where he literally can’t even open the doors. And he has to unlearn the idea that humanity is central, that he is the norm.

2) John Crichton, an astronaut, is pretty great.

A show that’s about a straight white guy with high status having to learn that he’s not the center of the universe could easily be centered around a really insufferable person, but one of the subtle things that makes Farscape so wonderful is that Crichton is, for the most part, pretty excellent. He has a lot of presumptions to unlearn because almost anyone in his cultural position would, but he’s also just a stand-up guy: compassionate, intelligent, open-minded, decent, forgiving, brave, hopeful.

And the galaxy tries to kick a whole lot of that out of him. It doesn’t succeed, mostly, but if Farscape is about anything other than culture shock, it’s about the lasting effects of trauma. How you can go through a wormhole one person, and experience things that turn you into someone you don’t recognize.

That’s kind of grim-sounding, but ultimately, what I’m trying to say is that Farscape is almost fanatically devoted to character work. Crichton is not the only character who sounds like he should be one thing and ends up being another. All of the characters—all of them, all of them, even the annoying ones—are complicated wonders. And you don’t have to wonder whether the events of the episode you’re watching are going to matter. They will. Everything that happens to the characters leaves a mark. Everything leaves them forever changed. Whether it’s mentioned explicitly or not—and often enough, it’s not explicit—the characters remember what has happened to them.

3) The living ship houses a lot of excellent women, among them the ship itself.

Ah, the women of Farscape, thou art the loves of my fucking life.

There’s Aeryn Sun, former Peacekeeper (that’s the military that the “insane military commander” hails from) now fugitive, currently learning the meaning of the word “compassion” (literally). She will break your fingers and also your heart. John/Aeryn is the main canon romantic ship.

There’s Pa’u Zhoto Zhaan, a priestess of the ninth level, current pacifist, former anarchist. Sorry, leading anarchist. She orgasms in bright light! (Oh my god, Farscape.)

There’s Chiana, my fucking bestie, a teenage(ish? ages in Farscape are weird) fugitive on the run from a repressive authoritarian state. Chiana is like a seductress con artist grifter thief who mostly just wants to survive so that she can have fun, damn it. Characters on Farscape do not really discuss sexualities (sex, yes, sexualities, no) and it would be fair to say that several of them do not fall along human sexuality lines generally, but I’m gonna go ahead and say that Chiana is canonically not straight.

Then there’s Moya, the ship herself, and it’s hard to get a straight read on Moya’s personality, since she mostly can’t speak. But she definitely has opinions, and things and people she cares about. And she moves the plot, though that gets into spoiler territory.

Past first season, further excellent women show up: Jool (controversial, but I like her), Sikozu (I once saw a Tumblr meme where someone had marked down that Sikozu would lose her shit when someone pronounced “gif” wrong, and that’s absolutely correct, and it’s why I love her), and Noranti (who is incredibly weird, and incredibly hard to summarize, but man, you gotta love her willingness to just show up and do her thing). Plus, there’s a recurring female villain, Grayza, who I could write probably multiple essays about. (I don’t know how you will feel about Grayza, as not everyone loves her, but I think she’s fucking fascinating, especially because she’s not actually the only recurring female villain. We also get Ahkna!)

(Side note: I should mention, here, that the cast of Farscape is really, really white. There is one cast member of color, Lani Tupu, but he pretty much represents the entirety of even, like, incidental diversity in casting for the series.)

Anyway, Farscape is full of awesome women, and also awesome and unexpected men, and it really enjoys playing with audience expectations of gender roles, generally. Literal entire books have been written about the way that Farscape fucks around with sex, sexuality, and gender. It’s a little weird because it was the late 90s/early 2000s, and sometimes that does come through, but Farscape’s guiding principle was always to try not to present American culture of the time as the norm, so like. It is not.

(An aside on Farscape and sex: Literally every character on Farscape has sexual tension with every other character. If you are a shipper, this is a Good Show, because no matter who you ship, there will not only be subtext, you will get a Moment of some kind. Multiple characters kiss the Muppet. Farscape is dedicated to getting into the nitty-gritty of the galaxy—I like to think of it as showing the guts of the universe—so a lot of the show is kind of squishy. They live on a biomechanoid ship, instead of androids there are “bioloids,” there’s a lot of focus on strange alien biologies, and lots of weird glowing fluids and things. I think the sex thing is kind of part and parcel of the larger biology focus: Farscape is really fascinated with how we all eat and evolve and live and die and, well, fuck. Which is in turn, kind of part of its focus on making everything really alien.)

4) Other stuff you should know.

Farscape as a whole is excellent, but it was kind of the product of creative anarchy—an Australian/American coproduction (oh yeah, everyone except Crichton speaks with an Australian accent) that was also partnered with the Henson company, whose showrunners were based in America but whose actual production all took place in Australia, and who was just constantly trying new things. So individual episodes can vary wildly in quality. It really takes off in the back half of season one, but no season is without a few off episodes.

It is extraordinarily funny, and I really think I haven’t stressed that enough. It’s one of the shows I want to quote the most in my daily life, but almost all of its humor is really context-dependent, and if you just wander around going, “Hey Stark? What’s black and white, and black and white, and black and white?” people look at you really funny.

It’s very conversant with pop culture generally (although obviously sci-fi  specifically, and Star Trek most specifically of all) and really enjoys deconstructing tropes, often to the effect of, “Well, Crichton really does not know what to do here, does he?” but sometimes just to be interesting.

There are also a lot of themes about science, and its uses and misuses.

The whole thing is fucking epic, and if you get invested at all, will take you on an emotional ride.

This show is weird. I know that that’s probably come across by now, but I think it’s worth reiterating as its own point: Farscape is so weird. Like, proudly, unabashedly, trying its hardest, weird. An amazing kind of weird.

If you’re into fantasy, you should know that there’s a recurring villain who’s just a wizard. Like, they don’t bother to explain it any more than that, he’s just a fucking wizard.

In summary: You should watch Farscape because it is a weird, wild, emotional, epic romance/drama/action/allegory full of Muppets and leather and one-liners and emotional gut punches and love, and if you let it, it will worm its way into you and never let go, which, now that I think of it, is another Farscape plot.

Send me meta prompts to distract me from my migraine!

[echo-three-one]

Chapter 28

The boys are back... (High School Musical, probably)

THE ROAD SO FAR

Docked and Loaded

Alexander "Alex" Collins

MacTavish Residence, Glasgow Scotland

Alex loved the idea of sleeping beside his significant other. It felt great to be loved, especially after all those months when he couldn't stop thinking of her. 

Yet today was different, he woke up alone. He turned to the bathroom door to check whether Samantha took a shower, but it was too quiet. So he decided to put on his grey tank top and sweatpants to go look for her.

He pulled the door open to see Samantha carrying a tray containing two meals, one was a fluffy pancake with maple syrup and the other one was a meaty sandwich.

"Hey, you. Good Morning." She greeted, her voice was always angelic in Alex's ears.

"There you are…" he sighed as he stepped back, letting her in.

"I was only gone for a few minutes. You don't have to worry that much." She grinned, guiding Alex back to the bed, teasingly pushing him as he plopped on the soft mattress bouncing as he slowly backwards crawled until his back hit the headboard.

"I'm just not used to waking up without you in my arms." he grinned as Samantha placed the tray on his lap, grabbing a slice of the sandwich and pointed it at his mouth.

"I thought the pancake was mine." Alex said, looking puzzled.

"No, that's mine. What you're supposed to be eating is this very healthy, dietician prescribed meal." She emphasized. Alex frowned. 

"I want the pancake." he complained playfully. 

"Too much sugar is bad for you." she teased as Alex finally surrendered and opened his mouth wide. He wasn't a huge fan of the wheat bread. 

"Say, aside from Alex. Did you use any other names while undercover?" Samantha slowly plopped herself beside him, locking her hands against his and leaned on his strong biceps.

"Oh hmmm.." he hummed, softly chewing and finishing his sandwich.

"I had a few… like James, Chad, Mike or Michael…" he said.

"Okay. Which was the most sophisticated?" Samantha asked. Alex looked at her in the eyes and saw that she was really interested in his answer.

"Nathaniel." he chuckled and Samantha looked confused.

"What's funny?" 

"I don't strike as a 'Nathaniel'. I just used it once." Alex defended despite not being attacked.

"Now that you say it… yeah." she laughed as soon as she realized the content of his words.

"What's the funniest? And why?" her eyes sparkled, or has it always been that way then he looked at her eyes. Alex never knew, but he liked it.

"Ummm.. I once went by 'Ray'. It's funny because… it just is. It's too short and I often mistake someone thinking that they're calling me. It has a lot of rhymes you know…" he answered, her eyes never left her stare.

"Ray's a nice name." Samantha mused, this actually made Alex a little curious.

"You're making me jealous over my previous name." He sneered playfully.

"Oh don't be. Alex is a very perfect name. It sounds... handsome." she said, making Alex smile in excitement. This was it. He was truly madly and deeply in love with this woman.

Alex leaned for a kiss to which Samantha eagerly accepted, but as soon as their hands started to roam around, a knock on the door was heard.

"Oi, Alex! Price wants us for a briefing." Soap's muffled voice roared from behind the door.

"I'm coming!" Alex shouted as she gave Samantha one quick kiss before leaving the bed.

Alex felt underdressed for the briefing as Roach and Soap were wearing collared shirts. So he hid behind them and listened eagerly to Captain Price.

"Alright boys, Laswell left us a gift. There's a port near the English Channel, where a lot of cargo ships are suspected to be operating under Shadow Company's name, and it might lead us to Shepherd. 

The plan is simple. Sneak in, gather everything we can using our cameras and sneak out. This place will be swarming with hostiles and all we have are pistols with few ammo. Soap, you take care of our ride and comms. Alex and Roach, you're with me." They all nodded in agreement.

"There are about approximately three ships and the Shadow Company shipment is mixed along with civilian cargo. We have to be there before 3 am tomorrow as it's scheduled to be unloaded that day." Price sprawled printout of the cargo's travel ticket along with other solid intel.

It was official. They're back in the grid, a wave of excitement and fear overwhelmed the former CIA. Excited because they're one step closer to ending this thing and scared because he knew Samantha's going to worry about him.

Port of Dover, London UK

1734HOURS

They were too early for the transfer but as they say, "The early bird gets the worm." The team positioned themselves on a rooftop of a nearby building, Price scanning the area with binoculars.

"Three huge cargo ships and one party packed cruise ship." he muttered. The rest of the team sat patiently waiting for the perfect opening.

"Hm. This is odd." Price added, noticing the convoy of expensive cars slowly parking themselves near the ship.

"It is. There's a party here tonight… and it says here SC Security Services was hired as the events' security team." Gary added, scrolling through his phone.

"SC. Shadow Company. Sneaky Bastards are using the party to cover their real agenda!" Soap pieced the puzzle together.

"And we're here to stop em on their bloody tracks." Price nodded and resumed scanning.

"How are we going to get in?" Alex asked as trucks of Shadow Company troops flooded the area. It looked like they had good reason to swarm the place. It was a sneaky yet effective tactic.

"I got one ticket." Gary raised a QR code from his phone. Price looked at the black and white blotches of squares in question.

"What's that supposed to do?" Price asked.

"It's a digital pass. The DJ performing tonight is a good ol' friend of mine." he said. 

"It's going to be a semi-formal party with a masquerade theme."  He continued, scrolling through the e-invite.

"Then you're going in there. See what's up. These cargo ships may just be decoys. We take one ship each. Always stay on comms. Once Roach successfully gets in, he'll find a shortcut from the inside." Price planned and everyone had no objections. 

"Wait. Maxine told me that she brought something useful." he scoured the contents of the duffle bag.

"Is it food?" Soap asked innocently as everyone looked at him.

"Bingo. Three Shadow Company Uniforms from Russia." Gary grinned and everyone looked delighted.

"Guess we're taking the easy way in." Price muttered as they put their plan to action.

Roach stopped at a local thrift shop for his attire. He wore an awkwardly tight tuxedo with rubber duck printed tie and a magenta masquerade mask. It wasn't too shabby and it did the job, as the rest of the group were already inside the premises.

"Stay on comms, Roach. Keep us posted." Price muttered as the team split to each of their ships. Walking casually like regular guards, except they didn't have guns.

"Aye aye, Captain." Roach muttered as slow booming could be heard from the distance. He was approaching the party.

Alex's ship was the farthest from the cruise ship but that didn't mean it was the least guarded. For a party, the place was overcrowded with security. Alex confidently nodded at every 'ally' he passed along the way, overhearing conversations of a supply drop around 3 am tomorrow, confirming Laswell's speculations.

"Hey!" Someone called from behind and Alex turned cautiously.

"You left your rifle at the office?" he asked and Alex nodded. The man pointed to the cargo ship and it gave Alex the free ticket to investigate it. He was lucky enough for an easy pass.

The cargo ship was indeed large, he didn't know where to start, but as soon as he claimed his issued rifle, he immediately looked for the ship's logs.

"I'm in. Got myself a gun." Alex reported.

"Good. I'm also in. Trying not to get tempted by the buffet." Gary replied.

"They're looking suspiciously at my haircut." Soap muttered, frustrated.

"My ship's empty, but I could feel footsteps. I'm being followed." Price warned. 

"Mine's full of stuff. It's impossible to look through these without a shipment log." Alex sighed, opening another door that contained useless stuff.

At the last door of the hallway, Alex heard a bizarre noise, he carefully crouched and checked on the room. A Shadow Company guard was snoring loudly, a computer monitor showing a live feed of the rooms in front of him.

"Ahem! Sir, you are needed on the cruise ship!" Alex roared, surprising the sleeping guard as he quickly got up to his bearings and exited the room. 

"Alright guys. I got eyes on the whole thing." He told comms while scanning the thick book of the ship's cargo.

"Good one." Gary said.

"Finally, these muppets stopped talking about my hair. I'm Oscar Mike." Soap muttered while Price's end remained quiet.

"Just what is Shepherd up to…" Alex mused, fingers scrolling through the ship log. He doesn't have all night but he's doing his best to look for it under pressure.

Next Chapter : Docked and Loaded - Part 2

Notification Squad my Beloved

@enderio @samatedeansbroccoli @smokeywhalee @whimsywispsblog @beemybee @ricinbach

[kaitosimp]

Okay so, I know I kinda started this whole music thing, but I only gave you one (1) recommendation. That was cuz I was freaking out about the luminary thing and wanted someone to hear it. HOWEVER, I have a few other songs I’d like to share while we’re on this topic. So uh,

- Sick of Losing Soulmates - Dodie

^^ This one could either be saimota or kaimaki, but I personally feel it fits saimota better

- Someone To You - BANNERS

Saimota again!

- Tunnel Vision - Egg

Okay I’m now realizing how many saimota songs I have- anyways, this could fit lots of ships I just saw an artist reference it in a saimota piece, and was like “Hey Yeah!”

- Help Our Souls - NIHILS

You may have heard the remix, but I’m talking about the original. Oumota 100%

- Kill the Lights - Set it Off

Oumota again. I found this in a danganronpa v3 MEP

- No Children - The Mountain Goats

I feel like someone already sent this? But maybe it’s just cuz it’s in like Every Oumota playlist. For good reason

- Waltz in E-Major, Op. 15 “Moon Waltz” - Cojum Dip

Well, just read the title. Eh, but other then that, I can’t help but imagine two certain purple bastards waltzing to the last two choruses.

- Rainbow Connection - The Muppet Movie, but there are tones of covers if you don’t like that one.

Have you heard of Saimatsumota? Cuz this one probably requires brain worms but- Saihara’s perspective.

- Nobody - Mitski

H... hangar kiss......

K I’ll shut up now! I’d recommend headphones, I know most people use them, just making sure!

You literally did start this whole music thing with that Mother Mother song, its crazy (in a good way) 😂💕 Reading over the titles I don't recognize any of em so this should be fun 🌚 I do recognize the band Set It Off and have heard a few songs from them so im excited to hear that one!

Sick of losing soulmates made me feel s o f t, it's a beautiful song 😭😭😭 Yes saimota!! I tried seeing it from both saimota and kaimaki but it fits saimota more 😩

SOMEONE TO YOU IS SUCH A BANGER, I LOVED IT 😩😩😩 "I'll make the moon shine just for your view, I'll make the starlight circle the room" SAIMOTA SAIMOTA SAIMOTA SAIMOTA-

The tunnel vision song is so dang nice 🥺🥺 Ur right omg, it fits a lot of his ships 😭😭 When it said "i wanna hold your stupid hand and kiss you on your stupid face" it gave me major, you guesset it, o u m o t a vibes 🌚 God its just so great 😭

I hadn't heard help our souls before, not the og song nor the remix actually 👀 It's a bop though, damn!! It reminded me of oumota in the hangar when they formed the plan and stuff 😩

Kill the lights- i fucking loved it 👁👄👁 That's more up my alley in terms of what I listen to so it's no wonder it's one of my faves on this list 😂 GOD ITS LITERALLY OUMOTA, WE HAVE ANOTHER ANTHEM ON OUR HANDS

Nobody mentioned the no children song actually 👀 bRO FROM THE FUCKING START I GOT HIT WITH OUMOTA VIBES WHAT- It sounds like oumota just being so fucking done with the killing game and just being hateful af to everything & each other even tho they're stuck together, I love it so much 💀

I RLLY THOUGHT THE MOON WALTZ WOULD BE A SOFT WALTZY TYPE SONG AND THEN THAT GUITAR RIFF BLEW MY WIG AWAY- Holy shit tho, again, this is more up my alley, and its so damn catchy and good and his voice is just???? ANOTHER BOP, I THINK THIS AND KILL THE LIGHTS ARE MY FAVES RN ✋🏽 Oh god oh god oumota waltzing to the last two choruses on their way to the press bYE-

Saimatsumota is Kaito, Shuichi and Kaede right? I know they're an ot3 but I didn't know their ship name! I just listened to it and I think you unlocked a memory deep within my mind lol, I think I watched this muppet movie at some point when i was younger cause I remember seeing kermit singing on a log on the tv, but ofc the movie was in spanish so i didnt realize it was from the same thing till i saw it just now 😂 I def see it from Shuichi's perspective in some bits of it!! I am not smart enough for subtle symbolism so I rlly had to dig in to see it 😩

NOBODY IS LITERALLY KAITO TRAPPED IN THAT BATHROOM HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS AND THEN HE AND KOKICHI KISS BYE-

Me, reading the headphones thing just after I finish listening to all of these without headphones: 👁👄👁 oops 😂 These were so nice to listen to!! I think I have another favorite *cough cough moon waltz cough*

[emotionallyits2009]

How do you feel about all those people citing Statler and Waldorf from the Muppets on that one post of yours that was apparently prompted by Supernatural shipping, the one about Toxic Old Men ship dynamics?

yea i mean it’s one of those jokes that makes you chuckle the first time you see it but becomes progressively less and less funny the next 500 times. and unfortunately i do see it every time in my activity page. so it’s like any popular post you know? I’m just lucky that I haven’t had too many of them during my time on tumblr dot edu.

two additional notes since you did ask for my Thots:

1. it wasn’t just about destiel! and i think it’s fun when people reblog it and tag it with a fandom that i’ve never heard of and i’m like wow yeah those sure sound like character names good for them

2. if anyone is thinking of clowning on this post and going “lol what do you mean statler and waldorf was a joke i was being serious” save your breath because they may seriously fit the dynamic i described BUT i’m guessing you’ve never thought about them and become so overcome by emotion that you had to lie on the floor like i have with all three pairings i initially tagged it as. but if you have lmk because you sound fascinating.

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Treasure of the Golden Suns Reviews: Wronguay in Ronguay (Paid for by Patreons)

Hello all you happy people and welcome back to the genesis of magillicutty   Ducktales with the second part of my months long look at Treasure of the Golden Suns, the mini series that kicked off the series. These reviews are a result of me hitting my first patreon stretch goal. I just did a LONGGG post outlining those here on tumblr so hit that up and help join my patreon so I can reach them and make some more moolah to help keep this my primary job. 

So speaking of that job we’re back to The Treasure of the Golden Suns and the first chapter, while not bad, was a tad disappointing, especially since I really liked it on first viewing. So will the second chapter fair just as bad or be a massive improvement? The only way to find out is under the cut. 

Previously on Ducktales: Donald shoved off with the navy leaving the boys with Scrooge, with both growing to care about one another... both out of nowhere

The boys ended up embroiled int he Beagle Boys theft of a wooden ship for a mysterious gentleman named El Capitan whose preferedd method of dealing with enterlopers.. was to use a chair like a lion tamer. After being falsely blamed for the theft, the boys ended up chasing the beagles to Scrooge’s candy factory, were vindicated and fought them off with Scrooge’s help , ending with the boys getting covered in choclate.  while El Capitan escaped vowing to find the gold. Now knowing the wooden ship was a map, the family prepared to set off

And that’s where we pick up. The reporter from last episode comments on the beagle bust and while the Beagles are hauled off, with Burger asking if they have any milk after eating his chocolate prison. Because his only  character trait is that...

The camera does linger on an impression the ship made in the chocolate... hmmmmmm.

Meanwhile we meet FLINTHEART GLOMGOLD. As I said with Catch as Cash Can, he’s not BAD, just not NEARLY as memorable as the triumphantly insane 2017 version. He’s sitll a good villian and we’ll see why soon, he just has the unenviable task of competiting with a far more iconic versoin made decades later whose far more my type of bad guy. El Captian calls him and offers to make him the richest duck in the world, which he naturally is happy to hear him out on. El Captian as a character i’ll get into more.. but for now let’s talk about his weird fucking voice. For some reason, Jim is doing a Dr. Claw impression, to the point I thought this was Frank Welker. I will grant it’s better than a horrible latinx sterotype, and given the grand kishke and a minor character in this very episode, they were NOT above those, but its’ still just.. weird. He just sounds like he’s possesed with about 80 or 90 demons for no explained reason. 

Back at the mansion, Scrooge and the Boys are both preparing to go after the treasure on the boat map: Scrooge is practicing vacuming it up using the pool and a sea safe vacum likely invented by Gyro, while the boys find the right coordinates to the treasure. Scrooge naturally.. is a bit of a dick about it, refusing to take them along despite them having found it, and saying they can stay with Duckworth. Duckworth’s response is about what you’d expect:

However before they can argue about this, there’s a bang at the door: It’s Flinty and here’s where the parts of this Glomgold I DO like, that do make him standout, if not as much sa his succesor shine: He plays scrooge, offering him 2 million for the Candy Factory. Naturally not realizing what Flinty’s getting out of the deal, Scrooge jumps at a quick and easy 2 million, since he knows it’ll cost MORE than that just to fix up the place. Flinty then proposes a contest: the two of them try to make as much money as possible from scratch in two days. No rules, no barriers, just whoever dosen’t have more money than the other by the end has to eat Flinty’s hat. Scrooge accepts.. but then realizes he has to eat crow and allow the boys along. With Scrooge sufficently blackmailed, the boys reveal where the treasure is: Ronguay, a made up south american county. Why they did so.. well just wait a second. And no it’s not just for the tile... but your close. 

No we find out why as they take the cheapest flight avaliable to Ronguay, only for the boys their going the Wrong way to Ronguay. 

Yeah I love a good pun but I draw the line at desinging an ENTIRE COUNTRY for a really obvious one. I have standards on this blog! Standards that include thirsting after Keith David , DBZA refrences up the whazoo and posting this gif of David Byrne at every given opportunity. 

Look my standards are weird, but their still standards. I draw the line at making a stupid pun when there’s a rich number of countries in South America. I’m not saying Carl Barks was ever against making up a country, he probably did, could be wrong, but more often than not he did his homework instead, as did his succesor Don Rosa. It feels lazy to just make up a country when you really don’t have to and could’ve just found one with a massive rainy season for your children’s cartoon. It’s not hard. I mean it’s harder than now: now I could just google “what south american countries have torrental rains”.. but it’s not like you guys could’n’t just go to a bookstore and buy a refrence book or a library and rent one. I mean if they ran out of time to do anyresearch fine, but even for the 1980′s it wasn’t that difficult to at least TRY. 

Regardless it turns out the pilot is a robot pilot.. who looks amazing but  as it’s a flintheart glomgold company joint is purposfuly tring to keep them off path. Look they didn’t have to unplug the poor guy. I know what he wants. 

So now on the right way to Ronguay our heroes lan only to find the locals all fleeing in terror of something. Scrooge heads in for suplies anyway and finds... a VERY racist sounding clerk. Seriously just to picture this.. picture say .. Michael Scott trying to do an mexican accent. You good and cringing? If not, adapt that to your doofus sitcom character or republican senator of choice There you go. You see my point. It’s not the WORST i’ve seen.. but only because I sat through the Rediculous 6 with my best friend, one of three, Cory, for a podcast we tried doing a year or two ago. I’ve seen Rob Schinder do  this for an entire movie. In 2015 no less. So my threshold for HORRIFCALLY offensive is vast and deep. But this is still garden variety racist and should not have been okay then or now. 

And it really SHOULD have the warning label on it. I’m fully in favor of the content warnings Disney started using, and it’s why I got so fucking annoyed during all the talk about it when it happend to the Muppet Show, ESPECIALLY when the republicans got a hold of it and accused them of “Canceling the muppets”. This is NOT fucking cancelation, this is a way to have the past there for posterity, while acknolding it sucked and was NEVER okay. It’s the best way to do this in my opinon, and it bothers me a LOT that a bunch of jagoffs coopted it and threw a hissy fit about Disney trying to do the right goddamn thing. And i’m also okay with leaving some media out. Disney + is a family platform. While keeping classic movies and shows on there with a proper warning is one thing, it’s another to not put song of the south or that episode of the muppets where the host later turned out ot be a pedophile on there. Some things just don’t have nearly enough worth to outpace the harm they can do. And it’s up to companies and consumers to figure out what fits where. 

Anyways our heroes find a llama for transport and that the map is seemingly a dead end to the desert. But Scrooge is determined to press on... and while he does El Capitan and Glomgold are following him, though the two clearly don’t agree on whose in charge, or if El Captian sounds like dr claw or not. They followed with their own copy of the map taken from the chocolate. 

As things progress the rain starts.. and our heroes find out via the JWG that this is what the citzens were all running from. They loose the llama, though are able to salvage some of their suplies it was carrying, and Scrooge nearly gives up to dispair. It’s a good, if sudden, character moment: Scrooge genuinely laments that he was worried one day he’d loose his step.. and stop being one step ahead of everyone. It shows some much needed vunerablity.. that beneath his boisterious and cantankerious usual personality he’s deathly afraid his age will eventualy mean he’ll have to stop..and having to stop adventuring and stop working and stop doing eveyrthing that makes him Scrooge McDuck is a fate worse than death. 

Thankfully he dosen’t as via a figure on the ship, Huey, Dewey or Louie figures out, in a REALLY amazing twist, that the desert itself was the ocean: the ship that has the treasure simply sailed here and hid it. So while our heroes reflect, Glomgold decides to take them out NOW while he has the chance over El Captian’s protests, as the good captain only cares about the gold. But Glomgold is right.. from a villianous point of view at least. leaving them alive is a waste.. granted he does so.. in a way that makes my brain cry out in pain and want to run. He lights a stick of dynamite. In a torrential rainstorm. 

I mean i’d expect 2017 Glomgold to try it and have it fail.. not to have the actually clever 87 version not only try something this stupid BUT HAVE IT WORK. THE FUSE LIGHTS. IT’S READY TO GO OFF. HE ONLY STOPS IT BECAUSE HIS MAP GETS EATEN AND THEY NEED SCROOGE’S IN TACT. JUST HOW DO YOU WHY DO YOU AUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-

Okay i’m.. i’m good now. So after that bit of nonsense and some taking my medication, our heroes take shelter in a cave. The grusome twosome try to sneak in while their asleep.. only to trigger the alarms the boys set up using their pots and pans, a “junior woodchuck alarm”. Clever little bastards. 

The tables quickly turn though as Thing one and Thing Two trap our heroes in the cave.. as i’ts flooding. Scrooge has them press on in hopes of finding a way out, and it rises further and furthe ran excenelty tense scene. But eventually our heroes manage to find somewhere safe in time: the shipwrecked boat with all the gold. Scrooge even puts on a nifty golden conquestador’s helmet. 

Naturally since we have minutes left in the episode the bad guys show up and have a gun... they never had before. 

Regardless our heroes are lowered into the lifeboat at gunpoint as the ship goes out to sea and i’ts revealed el captain worked on teh ship as he knows the full manifest.

However both villians personal flaws end up doing them in: Glomgold’s need to gloat means he gives Scrooge a golden coin as he mocks him about winning the bet... only for El Captain to fly into an insane rage demanding he swim out and get it despite just how LITTLE he really needs the coin. He and Glomgold struggle over the ships canon, both no longer needing the other and eventually fire off a ball that capsizes the ship. El Captian seemingly drowns while Glomgold is forced onto the life boat with the McDucks.. and finds out he lost as while he and Scrooge both lost the treasure the coin he tossed scrooge means Scrooge still has made more money. So Glomgold prepares to eat his hat and El Captian prepares for vengance and to get his gold back. 

Final Thoughts on Wronguay in Ronguay: The iffy bit with the store clerk aside.. this episdoe is easily the best 87 Episode i’ve seen.  It captures the spirit of barks perfectly with plenty of intresting twists that kept me engaged the whole time, some great jokes, and two great villians who are done in soley by their own greed and neurosusi> it’s really great stuff and what I expected more and remember more from the 87 Series: top notch adventure in the barks style but wiht it’s own unique touches. While the pilot was a bit rough due to all the ground it tried to cover, this episode, now having the basic formula of the series pretty much set, is allowed to just be a fun, daring adventure story that brilliantly builds off the last episode but can be wholly enjoyed on it’s own. Hopefully this momentum keeps because I don’t remember being the fondest of the next two episodes.. and given that content warning I think we’re in for a rough time next month. 

If you liked htis join my patreon, etc etc, I went into that mor eup top. Till All Are One, See you at the next Rainbow. 

[theelliottsmiths]

Could you please liveblog The Making of Rosenrot and Mein Herz Brennt.

Okay I'm gonna do Rosenrot here and then make a separate one for MHB, scheduled so nobody gets a massive wall of text I uh. Assume you pop around to check if I've answered stuff occasionally and this isn't a two ships passing in the night deal. I might schedule this one for like midday tomorrow to increase specifically your chance of seeing it as it's 00:27 BST here currently.

I have probably already done one but here's the thing, it's my favourite making of and it's been a while.

Right at the beginning chess piece Richard lurking in the sunrise smoking. Very cute, still despise the hat. Nodding roughly in time? Fun, though I'm curious as to what he was actually nodding for. To look cool? It didn't work

Oli suits the lurking in a habit thing

Paul looks so so sleepy and it's kind of adorable.

I lose it a little every time he says 'shave off my sideburns I don't know if monks have sideburns' as if he doesn't have earrings. I think he just likes it, it seems like it was the fashion to shave the sideburns and a little extra in the DDR alt scene?

Hnnnn the little noises he makes when he's getting the hood put on my HEART

On the hill just before they're shooting it sounds like Zoran is backwards somehow

Like usual, only some of the boys are allowed to look good. Schneider and Till? Beautiful. Flake and Richard. Very silly. Oli and Paul are fine.

Flakes little beanie. Tills little grin. Richard looking deeply uncomfortable. Suspicious, even. Oli masterfully blending into the background

Schneider is somehow actually more suspicious even than Richard. He has a very suspicious face in general when he's Present.

Nobody can resist fuzzy Till when he says But I wanna make friends too :( Even melted Zorans heart

I want. To rub his soft and fuzzy little head. It's so spherical.

There's something about them seating Till and Paul so they look the same size that I just really enjoy

Richard: shouldnt we have knives??

Zoran: no, you're monks! He does.

Richard: we don't kill him? :/

Paul: we burn him...

Richard, in an intrigued and distinctly positive voice: we burn him?

Flake is smiling at him it's so sweet I love to be reminded that they all love each other

I like the way Richard says 'like the inquisition?'. No real reason, just sounds nice.

Is 'in prinzip'(?) A common phrase in general or is it a Zoran thing? He says it a lot.

I'm only five minutes in this is going to be so long mobile tumblr doesn't let me add an under the cut I'm so sorry

When he talks to other Germans Paul's accent is so detectable. I adore it, it's like the bubble writing teenaged girls use on posters.

The chainsaw. I always forget the chainsaw. Paul being Paul, it's the most fitting choice. Chaos gremlin.

SCHNEIDER AND THE PUPPY

Richard looming over the children in the seesaw like the grim reaper waiting for one to fall off and crack their head on something hard

Olis sleeve wine is genuinely the funniest thing any of them have ever done. He has a penchant for doing robot movements and it's gotten to a point where I wonder if he's an android. A factory runaway because he was slightly faulty and about to be switched off. He ended up staying with Richard and Schneider because Richard understood and schneider didn't notice.

'dont bother asking me any questions, enough questions have already been asked' he says in his little beanie. Owns my heart. If the film thing is remotely true I want to know what Richard thinks, being so into films himself. He's smirking a tiny bit

God, he looks uncomfortable about the kiss.

Hey so anyway what is that guy doing behind him? Cleaning? Because he's using a paintbrush to do it and now I'm questioning whether most of the whipping was real...

I mean, later on you can physically see a welt forming in Paul's shoulder and they're all clearly in a bit of pain but that doesn't mean it's all real... Unless he's, like, painting on some ointment?

I adore this whole chunk of till practicing the murder scene, he's so... Disarming. Like hi yes I'm large and have a knife but you see, I'm actually small and silly look at my fuzzy head I'm v v approachable see my goofy pointy tooth smile? And my high voice and nice accent

Why is Zoran dressed as a monk too

You go here, and i—oop—make like this and then I get the knife and *stab sound*. I hit two, three times

Have you ever really payed attention to the way he makes his T sounds? It makes sense that it's different to the standard because teeth but this

Schneider looks so much like a plague doctor... Kinda into that.

I don't like that Zoran doesn't use Cătălinas name

Richards hair refuses to lie flat. The smoke floating up and then clicking into a straight line always catches my attention

Flake avoiding eye contact is, as the kids say, a major mood. Did he not understand Zoran or was he ignoring him til Oli got his attention? Was he already going deaf in one ear by that point? He looks like, and I mean this in the most loving way, a Muppet when he's looking directly at her. I think it was purposeful

Till giggling when Zoran tickles him with the rose. I do not understand why he says their relationship is ambiguous when they're... in bed together.

Hhhhhh god till looks so good in the flagellation lesson though. Soft sweet chumby boy. I like how visible his scar is.

Paul is always so into the violence and chaos isn't he? I like that he's singing the song but specifically it's the guitars, not the melody. And then theres Flake, the amateur masochist. The sudden camera eye contact always gets me.

A thing I really love about the whole self flagellation thing is that Paul is right there with till the entire time. He hurts himself almost as much as till does, he's there assisting when till is experimenting (sidenote...he does look good though huh), he's across the way where they can see each other in the circle (Richard is directly across which, I don't know, I feel like it's intentional). It seems like he's supporting him. Also that he's just a chaos gremlin and likes to be where the action is.

I've gone into so much detail about their whipping styles in the past

Schneider must be really relieved they didn't really use any of the clips during the whipping where he looks like a sock. He does not look mean he looks like a sock puppet with no hand I'm sorry but it's true

I do like the way Schneider and Paul talk about it though. They got a lot from the experience, it seems. I'd like to hear their thoughts on it now.

'Till, don't defend yourself!' ...the wriggling is cute

Flake and Richard having a little smile :) but Oli and Schneider, deadly serious.

Richard and Till... Should wrestle. Between this and Haifisch it's clear it'd be beneficial. Mein Teil does not count, it should be one on one.

I wish I knew what Till says as he gets up, I'm assuming hes joking about Richard beating him up?

Richard and paul are so careful beating him up. Paul especially is very careful to just softly jostle him. Also, the softest ear pinch

Oli: grinning, happy with their work

Paul: looking serious, not enjoying it at all

Richard: 😬, not remotely a fan, experiencing physical pain just seeing it

Oli heads off Paul's complaints perfectly, it's so practiced. He must have to do it regularly, Paul complains just for the fun of it.

-17° and he has Till topless on his back. Unnecessary. Its so cold the screen doesn't work.

I like to think they tried to drag him not-on his back

I just... I really Like Rosenrot and the making of.

[devilsrecreation]

Muppirate headcanons pt. 2

*inhales*

Old Tom, Real Old Tom, and Dead Tom are family. Dead Tom is Real Old Tom’s dad and Real Old Tom is Old Tom’s dad

Speaking of Dead Tom, he’s actually an “alive” skeleton who just acts dead most of the time.

Like, everyone would think Dead Tom’s inanimate until at one point, Tom just stands up and helps his crewmates in some way

Cue the surprised Pikachu meme

All the muppirates are a travelling band of sea fairing actors. AKA. They’re both pirates AND actors

Begoony is the youngest muppirate in the crew

Begoony has actually been abandoned before. Former friends and family alike, all his past relationships have left him in the dust for various reasons. Because of this, he’s super sensitive and clingy with his crewmates, in fear of being abandoned again

The Hispaniola has been renovated to having a stage where the captain’s cabin is. The stage is attached to the captain’s cabin so they can all practice rehearsing. It looks like this:

Jacques Roach is Pepe’s romantic rival (Pepe now has two rivals). They met in acting school when they both tried to hit on a lady. He’s kinda like anti-Pepe in a way

Jacques in 100% the cook. It just makes sense. Except sometimes he gets ingredients from the dumpster and the others refuse to eat it cuz some of it has plastic and that stuff’s dangerous to Polly and Walleye

Calico and Spotted Dick are plain old dorks whenever they interact. They’ve known each other since they were kids and that energy has stuck with them ever since

While Walleye finds Mudwell’s relationship with Dead Tom weird, Mudwell finds Walleye’s obsession with merpeople weird

Cute ot3 headcanon: They never realize it, but Polly, Clueless, and Monty always end up snuggling up next to each other whenever they’re sleeping

Bonus: Polly talks in his sleep, usually saying stuff like “Oh Clueless~” or “Mm, Monty...I love it when you do that..”

There’s a LOT of confusion between Toms since there are three of them

Mudwell: Poor Tom!

Clueless: Why? He’s right there! *points to Old Tom*

Mudwell: No, not that Tom! I meant the OTHER Tom! He’s dead!

Real Old Tom: No, I’m not. I’m fine

Mudwell: No, the OTHER one

Clueless: That’s what I said! Old Tom’s as fine as ever

Mudwell: No, I-

Old Tom: Have you been telling everyone that I’m dead?

Pew and Jacques totally hang together and talk shit about people in French. Jacques talks smack about Pepe while Pew talks smack about Deadly, Kermit, and basically everyone else he hates

So because his puppet was used as a woman in Muppet Christmas Carol and since I heard the voice, I now headcanon that Mudwell can do a female voice that he uses to distract enemies or just plain mess with people

Calico and Spotted Dick’s fav song is “Stop! In the name of love” and they use it to get each other’s attention

Polly: Hey, where’s Spotted Dick?

Calico: I got this.

🎶STOP! IN THE NAAAME OF LOOOOVE!!🎶

Spotty: *from a distance* 🎶BEFORE YOU BREEEEAAK MY HEEEEAAART!🎶

How Pew lost his sight: A crewmate of his took his eyes at some point but he couldn't figure out who it was(it was on purpose, too). After that, his former crew just kicked him off the ship cause they thought he was dead weight. The next leader became Black Dog. And before you ask, no, it wasn’t BD, or Angel Marie, or Mad Monty, they wouldn’t do that. (props @luigixlrepostblog for coming up with that one!)

The aftermath of losing his sight would be that Pew just didn’t give up and kept practicing his skills. Now, nothing can stop him from being a pirate

So based on my newest headcanon for Monty, I’mma add:

When the hat formed Monty from seaweed, the gem, and shark teeth, it created a baby Monty that would grow throughout the years. When the witch doctor went after his belongings, he saw baby Monty looking at him like “Sup”. After bringing him back on the boat, the witch doctor was like “You could be useful. I’m gonna keep you” and so he named him Mad Monty and he taught him how to be evil and become violent. When Monty came of age, his “father” was like “Okay, you’re of age. Go out and kill people” and kicked him out of his house. Monty didn’t know what to do at first, but then he saw a pirate ship and he was like “F it. I’ll be a pirate” and he’s been a pirate ever since

Walleye Pike HATES his voice. Everyone, including him, thinks he sounds like a creep/like he’s trying to kidnap a child and it’s a really touchy subject

Whenever one muppirate starts singing a shanty, within 5 seconds, ALL the muppirates are singing said shanty

Mudwell’s first name is Paul. And since he can play piano, he was in At the Bar. So whenever Clueless called out “Paul?” and the piano started playing, that was really Mudwell.

Mudwell also goes by the nickname Paulie and his middle name is Wahnacrakha. Paulie Wahnacrakha Mudwell. Yeah.

Clueless is omnipresent. He sees just about everything his fellow crewmates are doing and nobody notices until Clueless would accidently bring it up and everyone else is like “Wait, you saw that?”. What’s even worse is that he goes into detail about it

[mr-kamiyama]

Quick thoughts about Digimon:

I tuned in one morning I wasn't working, which was rare at that job I was at at the time, caught 02 ep 10, and was hooked. I later realised the writer of all the Dark Ocean content was Konaka Chiaki, whose work I generally like, so no surprise there.

I gotta say, they probably should've just gone with 「相棒」 for partner. This word is usually a partner in context of a business partner or police partner--in fact, a show called just that has been running for the entire 21st century about detective partners (and it's a pretty good show. I've seen it be sympathetic to the plight of undocumented immigrants, for one)

Using "partner" the English loanword...well, the context I really hear it in is same-gender partner.

Now, mind you, I only figured things out as an adult, and native Japanese speakers here are and always have been treated pretty miserably. (Which is why "exotic Japanese garnish for my human default English" is very, very much rubbing your priveledge in our faces, incredibly offensive, but hey, y'all also repost Japanese fanworks without permission to the point many delete their accounts and give up because y'all are so married to the idea we're not people, which frankly, y'all's treatment of queer men in fandom is equally garbage)

But the reason that point is mentioned is that we're so sidelined, it's hard to even find and connect with each other (e.g. SF Japantown only has Japanese speaking clerks on one floor of Kinokuniya where the books in Japanese for us are kept. It's now "look Asian for the tourists") so a lot of us end up having trouble accessing random words in our own language because we're so used to either no one around us speaking it or bad consequences when we break our English with Japanese.

So, as I've never experienced queer life in Japan, and Japanese immigrants commonly end up yoyoing back to English, I'm not entirely sure "partner" the loanword is the only way to express same-gender partner as opposed to just the only one I've heard.

It does stand that it is *a* way. (Well, obviously, you could still use terms like "boyfriend" or "wife" but think the same as English speakers use it)

When watching 02, it's pretty easy to not go there because they're so young, and interact with the digimon during downtime like siblings, as the digimon are children as well (and you can't tell me that Wormmon isn't spot on for a younger brother in an abuse situation caring for an older brother)

Tailmon isa bit different, and obviously more mature, but ep 10 was the only Hikari-centric episode, and I never really had the desire to go back and watch Adventure. I don't feel like it had something for older viewers like I got out of 02-Frontier (Savers was intentionally about older viewers, and it was like a Doogie Howser/Men in Black/Digimon crossover, and I love it. And it had adults and even an elderly character with Digimon partners! Yay for useful adults!) so I admittedly can't decisively say about Tailmon.

But the rest do seem like siblings to their human children. And they're pointedly all children.

But just now, I was watching the new short, To Sora.

I have to say, as Piyomon has an adult voice, and Sora is an adult, my mind definitely went to "maybe the nomenclature could be better."

I do also have to say that I'm rather disappointed that they're ending this with "adults can't be Chosen anymore." At least there'll always be Savers, and maybe someday, I'll have enough of my massive dual-prong Digimon and Bleach project up that I can call it "extant" (I'm having a handful of the Bleach gang become Chosen as well as Osamu put into a gigai, and if you know Bleach, just imagine Coyote Starrk getting a new friend. Of course, he still has Lillynette and also adopts most of the Arrancar as his own children, but yes, Coyote gets a Digimon friend, too. And they're specifically trying calling adults because the kids keep getting too traumatised)

Ah, things run away from me.

But yes, especially with adult chosen and digimon, "partner" the loanword with no qualifier (i.e. "partner digimon") sounds like something else entirely to my queer mind www

And also "boo" for usefulness having an age limit. I wouldn't be saying this if this weren't specifically being aimed at fans who grew up with Adventure, and, while younger than me, are still well into adulthood. Cross Wars or the reboot have no reason to concern themselves with adult viewership, but Kizuna is being made for adults. So "end of childhood=end of your ability to be a hero" seems kinda... Even if they're just trying to end the original Adventure franchise, seems like a...they can do it better.

While no, Ken's and Daisuke's parents and Jun really *don't* deserve love, just... I dunno, there's just a deluge of teen heroes with powers and some immortal hero stories, but there's not a whole lot of the kind of adults you see in Savers. Yeah, they're side characters, but I'll take what I can get. Kizuna's approach is more common, which is a shame now that the average fan is roughly 29.

(Doesn't it also mess up the whole making the epilogue make any sense, what with everyone being with their digimon in that?)

(And for that matter, I would've loved 02 parents to have names, and maybe they could've gone into Miyako's more. She seems like she has a solid family. We see Ken explaining the digimon, and his parents exploited him until he had a breakdown. Heck, his dad continues to jump down his throat over things. Why couldn't Miyako's get some love? Why can't we see Miyako explaining digimon to her family and stay up all night with her older siblings hanging on her every word? Which considering how much real life kids get sorta discounted when two adults are talking (which I'll often just walk past and wave to the kid, so they know someone sees them) might have actually been an empowering fantasy for viewers. And a really great balance to Daisuke and Ken's home lives. (The kids with unpleasant families feel represented and empowered because they can still be heroes, but kids can also have the empowerment of watching Miyako's whole family, of which she is the baby, hanging on her words

(Also, why can't we see how someone from that family could enjoy the company of someone who slaps her kid brother around? And has some kind of stalker complex? Sure, it's stuff I can make answers for myself in my project, just like the initial reason to cross them was explaining the Dark Ocean, but I really would've loved something in canon about them)

Typically, adults in any kind of action hero story--let's look at Star Wars. The people who raised Luke are non-combatants. Obi-Wan Kenobi and Yoda (an older Muppet, but older still stands) are just there as mentors, like Urahara in Bleach. It's really on Luke's shoulders. Han Solo is as old as a hero gets, and he's pretty young himself. (I've seen the original trilogy, and it was forever ago, so if Luke Skywalker is actually a teenager, forgive the error)

You don't see anyone between 20 year old hero and 60 year old mentor doing much of anything. Buddy cops are the only exception to this.

Shame that digimon is gonna follow that pattern instead of buck the trend, especially now that their fanbase is getting older. I dunno how much of a letdown the apparent Kizuna narrative is for a 29 year old as opposed to someone who wasn't even a kid when it was new, but I'm sure it's there. Even if I am decidedly older than that, I can't be the only one disappointed by it. If I thought I was, I wouldn't make this post.

And it kinda messes up using this to make the epilogue make any sense. When it was first revealed that Yamato suddenly became an astronaut, Gabumon was there with him on Mars. So on and so forth, and all humans had partners. Which naturally includes all the people over 23.

I guess we'll always have Satuma and Kudamon. (Miki and Megumi are nice too, and are also teetering on the edge of canon ship, which it's nice to see queer female fans get that, but they do seem like they're in their early to mid 20s, which arguably puts them at the end of typical "useful age range")

I'd love to already have an alternative up, but for now, I only have a few Bleach prequel one shots posted and over 800 pages of bullet point notes.

[superdorkcat]

Upcoming Disney+ Originals (TV Shows)

One Day at Disney (December 3, 2019) - The documentary follows employees across the various divisions of the Walt Disney Company, taking a look at a day in the life of their jobs.

Diary of a Female President (2020) - The series is told through the narration of a Cuban-American 12-year-old girl’s diary, as she navigates the ups and downs of middle school and her journey to becoming the future president of the United States.

The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (2020) - Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes deal with the aftermath of Avengers: Endgame, in which Wilson was handed the mantle of Captain America.

Monsters at Work (2020) - Six months after the events of Monsters, Inc., the city of Monstropolis is now fueled with the sound of laughter. Tylor Tuskmon, a mechanic on the Facilities Team, dreams of working alongside his idols Mike Wazowski and James P. “Sully” Sullivan.

Earth to Ned (2020) - The comedic half-hour series follows Ned, a blue-skinned alien and his lieutenant Cornelius, who were sent to scout Earth for an eventual invasion - but instead became obsessed with our popular culture. Now, they host a talk show, broadcast from the bridge of their spaceship hidden deep underground, where they interview our most precious commodity, celebrities, to talk about Ned’s current pop culture obsessions. Ned will be bringing real-life celebrity guests to his ship from across the known universe and interviewing them, late night talk show style, in hopes of producing the ultimate talk show - making Ned a celebrity and putting him further off mission. And the more Ned learns about our human culture, the more obsessed he becomes.

Short Circuit (2020) - A program where anyone at the Walt Disney Animation Studios can pitch an idea and potentially be selected to create an original short film with the support of the Studio and their fellow artists.

Muppets Now (2020) - An unscripted series, the premise is unknown. The show will feature celebrity guests.

Be Our Chef (2019-2020) - The series invites families from diverse backgrounds to join a Disney-inspired cooking competition at Walt Disney World that’s positive and playful in tone. In each episode, two families will participate in a themed challenge based on their family traditions and the magic of Disney. The finalists will apply what they’ve learned to create a dish that represents their family through a Disney lens.

Cinema Relics: Iconic Art of the Movies (2019-2020) - An anthology series that takes a unique look at beloved films through the props and costumes that made them unique - from the craftspeople who created them, the actors who interacted with them, and the collectors/archives who own and cherish them

Into the Unknown: Making Frozen 2 (2019-2020) - As never before in its near-century long history, Walt Disney Animation Studios is opening its doors, allowing cameras to capture in intimate detail how the voice cast, directors, and team of artists come together to create “Frozen 2”. This multi-episode documentary series shows the hard work, imagination, heart, fun, and intensity that go into making one of the most anticipated Disney Animation features of all time.

Magic of the Animal Kingdom (2019-2020) - In the heart of Central Florida, a team of more than 1,000 highly respected animal care experts, veterinarians, and biologists perform groundbreaking work at Disney’s Animal Kingdom theme park and Epcot’s SeaBase aquarium. Now for the first time, National Geographic will offer viewers an all-access pass into the 24/7 world of the incredible animal caretakers running one of the most advanced veterinary facilities in the world.

Marvel’s 616 (2019-2020) - An anthological documentary series from Marvel New Media in partnership with Supper Club that explores the intersection between Marvel’s rich legacy of stories, characters and creators and the world outside your window. Each documentary will dive into the rich historical, cultural and social context that has become inseparable from stories of the Marvel Universe.

On Pointe (2019-2020) - The series will follow a year in the life of students at the New York City school as they go through rigorous training, auditions and preparations for the New York City Ballet’s annual performances of “The Nutcracker”.

(Re)Connect (2019-2020) - In each episode, a family will disconnect from their busy lives, devices and outside influences in order to address a relatable issue that’s driving a wedge between them. With the help of a specialized expert, each family will go on a unique journey to confront the family’s dilemma head on. 

Rogue Trip (2019-2020) - Renowned journalist Bob Woodruff travels the world with his 27-year-old son, Mack, and visits all of the places your average tourist is least likely to venture - the roguish, often misunderstood and frequently overlooked corners of the world whose hidden corners surprise, amaze and inspire.

Shop Class (working title) (2019-2020) - A new competition series featuring teams of inventive students, who are tasked with designing, building, and testing new contraptions. In each episode a panel of experts will rate their work based on engineering, design, and the final test of the build.

Untitled Chip ‘n’ Dale series (2019-2020) - Plot unknown, the series will feature “classic style comedy”.

Loki (2021) - The series will follow the Loki who stole the Tesseract in Avengers: Endgame. Additional plot details are unknown, but the series will tie in to Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness.

WandaVision (2021) - The series will be a take on a superhero sitcom. Additional plot details are unknown. Similarly to Loki, the series will tie into Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness.

What If...? (2021) - The series explores what would happen if major moments from the Marvel Cinematic Universe occurred differently.

Hawkeye (2021) - The series will focus on Clint Barton passing the mantle of Hawkeye to Kate Bishop.

Untitled Cassian Andor series (2021) - The series is billed as a rousing spy thriller that will explore tales filled with espionage and daring missions to restore hope to a galaxy in the grip of a ruthless Empire.

Ink & Paint (2020-2021) - The documentary series, based on the book of the same name, tells the story of animation at Disney, and how an unsung workforce of trailblazing women helped create some of the greatest animated films of all time.

Earthkeepers (working title) (2020-2021) - The series is a cinematic documentary series that enters the adventurous lives of the people changing the way we see the animal kingdom. The episodes focus on conservationists and the animals they’ve devoted their careers to studying, diving deep into the personal trials and professional breakthroughs of protecting the planet’s most endangered species.

Big Shots (TBA) - The series follows a temperamental college basketball coach who gets fired from his job and must take a teaching and coaching job at an elite all-girls private high school.

Lizzie McGuire revival (TBA) - An update of the classic Disney Channel series that will follow the title character as a 30-year-old millennial navigating life in New York City. 

Love, Simon (TBA) - The series is set in the same world as the 2018 film and focuses on a new student at Creekwood High School, Victor. The series follows his journey of self-discovery: facing challenges at home and struggling with his sexual orientation. He reaches out to Simon when it seems too difficult for him to navigate through high school.

Moon Knight (TBA) - The plot is unknown, but the series will introduce Moon Knight (Marc Spector) into the MCU.

Ms. Marvel (TBA) - The plot is unknown, but the series will introduce Ms. Marvel (Kamala Khan).

She-Hulk (TBA) - The plot is unknown, but the series will introduce She-Hulk (Jennifer Walters).

Untitled Obi-Wan Kenobi series (TBA) - The series will take place eight years after the events of Revenge of the Sith. The rest of the plot is unknown.

Becoming (TBA) - Each episode of the documentary-style series, shot in vérité, will visit a celebrity’s hometown, touring important locations that were central to their upbringing. A supporting cast of family members, coaches, teachers, mentors, and friends will also be interviewed, sharing anecdotes and insight into the star’s “becoming” story.

Behind the Attraction (TBA) - The series takes viewers into the history of how popular Disney attractions and destinations came to be, how they have changed over time, and how fans continue to obsess over them. The series will feature interviews with fans as well as Disney Imagineers and other people behind the scenes.

The Big Fib (TBA) - In this game show, two grown-ups claim to be experts on a topic and one of them is lying. It’ll be up to a kid contestant to try and figure out which one is telling “the big fib”.

Marvel’s Storyboards (TBA) - This series will follow Joe Quesada, Marvel’s Chief Creative Officer, as he explores the origin stories and creative drives of storytellers of all mediums, backgrounds, and experiences.

People & Places (TBA) - The series will present true stories from all around the glob about real - and extraordinary - people who embody the Disney ethos. A mix of up-and-coming and established filmmakers will be featured.

Explorer Academy (TBA) - The series will be “fact-based fiction”. The plot is unknown.

Life and Deaf (TBA) - The series is a comedy about a kid growing up in the ‘70s with deaf parents - and the mischief that ensues when, as their ears and mouthpiece, he’s given the “keys to the kingdom”.

The Proud Family revival (TBA) - The series will be revived according to the VA of Oscar Proud, Tommy Davidson. What the premise will be is unknown.

Untitled Mighty Ducks series (TBA) - The series focuses on a 13-year-old boy when he gets kicked off the junior division Mighty Ducks team, his mom decides to start their own team, finding players, a coach, and a place to play.

Untitled The Sandlot series (TBA) - Plot unknown, the series will be set in 1984 and focus on the kids of the original.

Untitled True Lies series (TBA) - Plot unknown. Mostly a reboot.

Untitled Willow sequel series (TBA) - Plot unknown.

[zettaiunmeis]

Zari talks to Sara about her feelings for Charlie and what she should do about it and Sara gives her advice and the fic has Zari acting on Sara’s advice

asdfghjkl this was supposed to be a story, but I can’t brain enough to make words go right now so have some headcanons instead:

also, this turned out really long, so everything is below the cut:

- after the witch hunt episode, whenever either sara or zari felt like they needed someone to talk to or had some stuff that they need to get off their chests, they met up in the parlor

- so at one point after dancing queen, zari just marches into the parlor and Sara knows exactly what she wants to talk about: amaya

- and at first, zari is just ranting about how much of an asshole the new shapeshifter is because of course she was on watch duty first

- (she doesn’t call her charlie because then the shape became someone that they were keeping prisoner, the same way argus kept her and behrad and her parents prisoner)

- it takes zari half an hour of pacing and ranting and anger to get everything out and then she just flops onto a chair, spent

- sara takes the chance to talk about her own feelings about the situation, because she may not have been in love with amaya the way zari was, but she had still been her closest confidant on the ship

- she’s just as upset about charlie being trapped as amaya, but she talks about it slower and quieter, opening her feelings boxes and taking her thoughts out one by one

- after she’s done, they sit in silence for a bit and sara doesn’t really have anything left to say and she thinks that zari doesn’t either

- but zari says something else, something that sara really doesn’t expect after all the time zari spent denying her feelings

- zari says, “i was in love with her.” and its quiet and sad and a little bitter

- and sara doesn’t know how to answer that, other than reaching out and squeezing her shoulder

- the next time, sara finds zari binging a box of donuts and typing away at her laptop after the tagumo incident

- she tries to grab one, but zari hisses at her like a cat, and thats how sara knew that there was something on her mind

- so instead, she finds some of the whiskey she’d hidden away from both charlie and constantine and pours herself a glass

- and she doesn’t talk about anything, just leaning against the table in the center of the room and looking out

- zari knows exactly what shes doing and she doesn’t want to give sara the satisfaction of talking, but she also hates the quiet more than anything

- so when she finally cracks and tells sara to get on with it, sara makes sure to hide the smirk on her face

- and the first thing she mentions is that she’d talked to charlie earlier, and that she really wasn’t so bad

- and zari just scowls and shoves another donut in her mouth

- sara ignores her and just keeps talking, saying stuff that she knew would get zari started

- it takes sara mentioning the similarities between charlie and amaya

- and zari gets really mad

- she says that charlie is nothing like amaya, that the shapeshifter was annoying and vulgar and constantly drinking and refusing to cooperate and

- and beautiful and playful and a bunch of other things that zari hated talking about

- and sara, despite everything, despite the heated glances she had seen pass between the two, is surprised

- but charlie was a part of her crew now, whether she liked it or not, and sara had to make sure that zari wasn’t going to end up hurting her, so she asks a question that zari is utterly unprepared for

- “do you like her because she looks like amaya?”

- and zari’s first instinct is to deny it, to try and deny any similarity between charlie and amaya, but before she can actually say anthing, she starts thinking

- when she’s finally done thinking, the thing she tells sara is “i don’t know” because she really doesn’t

- the third time they talk is after the mess with constantine and charlie and all the alternate timelines, when zari marches right into the parlor, expecting only sara to be there, but sara’s telling ava what constantine presumably told her

- and they seem like they’re in a serious discussion, so zari just starts to apologize and back away to the safety of her either her room or the food fabricator

- but they both invite her back in, and ava asks her for her side of the story and she explains some parts better than others

- (she doesn’t remember much from when she was a cat, but unfortunately has a very clear memory of being a puppet)

- (its unfortunate. she had the feeling that being a cat was much better than being an off-brand muppet)

- but soon, the mission talk dies down and sara inevitably asks if zari’s okay and zari just sighs in the tired way that’d become a habit since being put with the B-team

- ava tries to leave but zari mentions that she could use an extra ear about her predicament and also ava still wants to make a good impression on sara’s closest friend so she stays

- and sara, knowing exactly what this is about, suggests that they go to her room to talk (primarily so that charlie won’t have the opportunity to walk in on them)

- so they go there, stopping at the dining room for zari to get a large bag of chips

- they sit down and ava has no idea whats going on or if it would be appropriate for her to talk, so she just looks at sara and zari while they sit in silence

- finally, sara speaks up, and she asks again if zari’s okay

- and instead of sighing, zari groans, massaging her forehead irritatedly and it speaks louder than any “no” zari could have said

- then sara asks her if its because of charlie and ava is completely lost

- and zari is silent for a long moment, stubbornly refusing to say anything, shoving chips into her mouth instead

- by the time zari answers, with a whispered “yes”, she’s halfway through the bag of chips

- and sara asks if she’s thought about her question from before and zari nods silently as if saying it out loud would set it in stone

- so sara prods her verbally until zari finally groans and mumbles out an answer

- and that answer is, “its not because of amaya”

- “i like fucking charlie”

- (ava is just standing there, shocked, because what the fuck????? charlie and zari???? zari’s into women????? i need my gaydar replaced???)

- and sara asks if thats a problem

- and zari’s answer is a huge fuck yes it is

- because she’s never had enough time for a relationship before???? she’s never been in one????

- (the closest thing was sleeping with helen of troy in the jumpship before dropping her off at Themyscira)

- that’s not even accounting for the possibility that charlie doesn’t like her like that???? (*laughs out loud while writing that*)

- and sara is like “im sorry have you not noticed all the eye sex you’ve been having”

- and after having thought about it and mentally reviewing everytime she had been in the same room as them, ava adds “and also shes always looking at you? even when you’re not looking at her? or even doing anything?”

- zari retorts with a “you’ve seen us around each other like, twice”

- “and i still noticed?”

- sara says, “see?”

- and zari’s like, “that’s still not the point? I still have no experience with relationships and also the ship is cursed?”

- “the ship is not cursed”

- “name one couple where both people lived on the ship and it didn’t end in tragedy?”

- and everything is silent for a while, becase there is literally no waverider crewmember x waverider crewmember ship that’s ever worked

- so, zari continues, “what’s the point in trying if im doomed anyway?”

- and sara takes a moment to think about it, and finally, she looks zari in the eye, and says, “sometimes, love is worth the risk.”

- and zari groans because a) its so cheesy and b) if she disagrees, she’s gonna sound like a hypocrite

- so, she says “fine” and then sara and ava help her figure out a way to ask charlie out

- (sara suggests ghengis khan. ava suggests talking to her. zari tells them both that they’re idiots, but tries ava’s idea anyway)

- (it works. very, very well.)

(looking back, i might actually write this out as a story at some point)

[yutaya]

Things About the Be More Chill Revival (Nov 12, 2017 performance)

This actually got really long so I’m putting it under a cut. Warning for Be More Chill spoilers below, I guess.

Before the show and during intermission they were running tweets from the audience on the backsplash

In the program there’s a spread that’s like yearbook photos with in-character photos and quotes

This is just an Exit 82 theater thing but on the wall were the heckling muppets

When Jeremy’s Theme started the silent “oh my god oh my god oh my god is this really happeninggggg” emanating from EVERYONE IN THE THEATER was physically palpable

Every time a new scene or song would start or when a character would enter the stage the crowd would cheer

Jeremy does not bump into Rich trying to escape the girls prompting the “don’t touch me, tall-ass!” line and the “boyf” writing. Instead, Rich actively seeks out Jeremy and shouts the line about not touching him, even though Rich is the one who just ran up and grabbed him from behind completely unprompted.

Rich also runs straight over to Jeremy’s chair when he enters play rehearsal even though Jeremy’s not even looking at him to start shaking him and humping his chair.

An interesting thing: Jake and Rich do not seem to be the same kind of friends here. In the 2015 version, we saw them greet each other coming in opposite directions down the hallway with a high-five-low-five sort of custom-bro-fist-bump, semi paralleling Jeremy and Michael’s secret handshake later in the same song, and start talking about the weekend or previous day or w/e and Madeline. However, in the 2017 version, much like Rich just ran up to and instigated the "Don’t touch me!” interaction with Jeremy while Jeremy wasn’t paying him any attention, Jake just walks right past them and Rich is the one who runs at him from behind, calling out the “Yo Jakey-D!” greeting and weaving his way into Jake’s space to get Jake to look at him. It definitely brings to mind the whole “Rich is a sad suicidal loser who wants to be a part of the It crowd so he got a Squip but honestly he’s still stuck on the outside looking in and even when everybody is talking about him and what happened to him and what he would want if he were here nobody even bothers to fucking visit him in the hospital - the first visitor he sees is Michael but Michael is only there for Jeremy and is an anti-social headphones kid so Rich has to wait for Jeremy to wake up to have someone to ask about what people are saying about him at school” thing

I know everyone ships Rich/Jake because best bros or something but honestly the person Rich seemed to devote the majority of his attention to in this version was Jeremy haha

For the first “Christiiiiiiiiiiiiine” part of More Than Survive, rather than loads of super Extra twirling and stuff by Christine, she was doing things like wiping her mouth with the back of her hand - things that normally might not be considered super attractive and highlighting how she’s super special in Jeremy’s eyes when other people would just see a random person.

She does get SUPER excited later when she sees the play sign up sheet though. Slams her hands on the wall to stare hungrily at it, dives to the ground to rifle through her backpack for a pen, and Jake lifting her up while they do contemporary dance poses lasts for the entire time Jeremy and Michael are singing her name.

When Jeremy has the verse about “why can’t someone just help me out” he legit sounds like he’s about to cry

On his way out after inviting Christine to the mall later, Jake pauses while passing Jeremy and lets him know that “Someone wrote Boy-Eff on your backpack” in the same sort of sweet considerate way that Christine did during More Than Survive. This is interesting because it 1. Shows Jake being kind (directly after putting him in a situation that might normally paint him as the love-rival-therefore-enemy - but, oh, fuck, no, he’s nice) and 2. implies that Jake does not know about Rich bullying Jeremy. See: Rich and Jake might not actually be close friends^

In the bathroom, when Jeremy says “aren’t you gonna wash your hands?” Rich walks up to him and pointedly RUBS HIS DIRTY PENIS HANDS ALL OVER JEREMY’S FACE AND CHEST

In Two-Player Game, Jeremy is standing up for the “favorite person” line, so Michael also stands up and walks over to tuck his head against Jeremy’s shoulder while mocking him. Jeremy shoves him away and Michael just stays with his body locked in the same position and lets himself dead fall onto the beanbags

Michael dabs during one of the first “cool in college” lines and it’s like “wow you ARE a loser”

They did this dorky pseudo dancing that was like amateur fighting moves like jump kicks and karate chops, and at one pint they were leap frogging over each other? dorrrrrrks

In the transition from Two-Player Game to the mall to go buy the Squip, Mario runs across the stage and does the little Mario jump like to hit a block and get a new item

By the way, Jeremy really does look SUPER awkward on Day 1. His striped shirt I thought was weirdly over a long-sleeve shirt even though the pattern didn’t lend itself well to that, but then it turns out they are one shirt?? It’s like that on purpose??? The Eminem shirt + vest combo really does look a lot cooler on him after that.

His body language is SO AWKWARD it was all very Evan Hansen

At the Payless, the drug dealers are these two goths so instead of the “sooooo Wolverine, right?” line it’s “soooo My Chemical Romance, right?”

The goth twins are speaking in unison in creepy computer voices and circling Jeremy and like - touching him while he squirms uncomfortably much like later during Do You Wanna Ride

They give him the entire shoebox for the one pill? Which I guess makes it less “???” for Rich to have the shoebox in his locker later”

When Jeremy is jerking around and yelping at the mall, Christine is asking what’s wrong, Jake is recoiling and someone (Jenna maybe? Our seats were really far away we couldn’t see anyone’s faces just their bodies) is recording, but when he escalates to screaming in pain they all just... get freaked out and run away? Leaving him alone on the floor even though he’s CLEARLY in major distress.

The squip stands with a very wide stance, like the standing version of taking up three bus seats. It’s a very obvious contrast especially in his first scenes to Jeremy in his hunched and close-legged position. When not standing, the squip is either crouching in a very predatory Gabe Goodman “I’m Alive” sort of way or lounging in a somehow very cool careless bad boy sort of manner.

When Jeremy is reciting the Squip’s story about Madeline and the shirt to Brooke and Chloe at the mall, he is making all the same arm gestures etc that the Squip is making - though more awkward in execution.

The “Hey Hamlet” actions were HILARIOUS. He literally collapsed over the table, then threw himself onto the floor like Draco Malfoy.

In Do You Wanna Ride Brooke and Chloe are basically dirty dancing on Jeremy and he looks SO UNCOMFORTABLE like he’s about to die and not in a “wow this is too hot my brain will explode” way more like an “extremely fucking terrified” sort of way

Brooke really drew out the “Pi~i~i~i~i~i~i~ink~i~ink~i~ink ~i~ink ~i~ink ah-Berryyyyyyyyyyyyy” riff for forever it was hilarious

Syncing with Rich’s Squip in the More Than Survive Reprise is... really really creepy? It gives of an extremely ominous mind-control sort of vibe like Rich is just Jeremy’s Squip’s puppet

In More Than Survive, everyone was dancing around Jeremy and he looked super awkward and uncomfortable - in the Reprise they do the same dance but this time Jeremy is dancing in sync with them all too.

The electric shocks seemed like they were happening extremely frequently in Act 1? Practically every 5 seconds in some scenes like literally every time Jeremy went to make some move or say anything or pause for too long or think anything at the Squip himself at all.

During Guy I’d Kinda Be Into the Squip talks for Jeremy a LOT. Basically everything he says and does is the Squip there.

When Jeremy does his whole Squip-assisted flawless recitation of his Midsummer part when Mr. Reyes tries to call him out, Brooke is so overwhelmed by his hotness that she drops her script. It just clatters to the floor while she stares at him.

The WARNING WARNING WARNING after Guy I’d Kinda Be Into Squip-controlled walk out is super robotic. A very distinctively robotic walk.

In “Upgrade” the Brooke and Jeremy scene is super sexual??? The Squip puts Jeremy’s hand on her boob while she’s talking. Jeremy draws it back and the Squip just puts it there again. Then the Squip makes Jeremy pull Brooke up against him in a very sexual sort of position. Jeremy jerks back and the Squip just makes him do it again. They end up doing this whole thing with lying on top of your partner holding them down, and then the person on the bottom flips the positions so they’re on top now, and it continues a couple more times so they’re rolling around on the ground with the Squip in control of Jeremy’s body the whole time, and it ends with Brooke straddling Jeremy and thrusting her hips with her head thrown back before he sits up and starts making out with her with her hips still going in his lap. It’s kind of a prolonged making out, too, complete with like... roaming hands by both parties.

Christine’s line “still I’m not sure what I should do” when Jake is asking her out is very clear and is presented like a soliloquy-type narration to the audience about her own feelings rather than as dialogue to Jake, before she agrees and he kisses her.

Some guy in the audience started moaning in distress preemptively shortly before Jeremy’s “optic nerve blocking: on” line

People around me were gasping at that line so maybe there were some people who didn’t actually know it was coming. Or they might have been superfans overwhelmed with emotion. Judging by the rest of what I was hearing from the other audience members the entire time, it’s probably the latter.

For the “optic nerve blocking” scene, Michael is standing alone on the upper level, where the Squip usually is. After Jeremy chooses to turn it on, the Squip walks up from behind him and touches Jeremy directly, wrapping his arms around Jeremy's shoulders - it’s the first time that the Squip is on the ground level alongside Jeremy and the rest of the people instead of alone on the second level just watching over all of them.

The moment Act 1 ended the audience EXPLODED into noise. It seemed like everyone simultaneously turned to their seat mates to start screaming about things. My brother was like “It’s been a long time since I’ve been in this sort of young teenage fangirl filled sort of environment.” Haha

At the Halloween party Rich is FULL OUT GLITCHING. His head and limbs keep jerking like a machine with a wrench in the cogs and he’s repeating “it’s Halloween” like a skipping record

The way he’s glitching here near the start of the party is very similar to the way Jeremy’s Squip starts glitching after the alcohol. It’s like the alcohol making Rich’s Squip glitch causes Rich to glitch in exactly the same way - like after 2 years his body and voice is just a manifestation of his Squip’s movements and words - like he IS the Squip and there is no Rich at all.

In Act 2, Jeremy really is just... walking and standing so much more confidently than Act 1? He looks extremely much more to be a normal, attractive guy. It’s very obvious in scenes when he’s talking to Michael, because we saw them having conversations in Act 1 where Jeremy was relatively comfortable since he was with his friend, but it’s still such a marked different in his body language and even the cadence of speech after having the Squip for a couple weeks. Again, it was very Evan Hansen vibes.

“What kind of slut do you think I am?” Chloe asks, while draping herself over the bed and pointedly spreading her knees and thighs open at Jeremy

Once the Squip makes Jeremy drink Chloe’s alcohol, the way it starts jerking around instead of being smooth for the first time is still pretty cool and collected / in control looking somehow - it looks like when a video chat is lagging and instead of smooth movement you get a series of jumpy still frames, but the person isn’t in distress or anything.

When Jeremy tells Michael to “Get out of my way. You Loser,” he literally shoves Michael aside with force and walks out, not slowing or looking back once as Michael crashes into the bathtub. Michael just...stays where he fell for the entire first part of Michael in the Bathroom

At the end when he’s in prime screaming mode he sings “it sucks you left me here alone” instead of “it’s sucks he left me here alone” - directing it at Jeremy directly

Christine talking about breaking up with Jake - she mentions the cheating but also outwardly calmly (remember she has mad gigantic feelings about most everything in reality) lists other reasons such as “we just don’t have ANYTHING in common”

When Rich is freaking out about needing Mountain Dew Red, he is glitching like crazy and he is only asking for the Red when he’s facing one direction, as if he has no brain activity when jerked into the other direction, but is repeating the request on a constant loop, it’s just that we can only hear it when he’s on the one frequency. Jeremy and Christine see him in obvious distress with his head like banging clearly without his control against the wall, which must hurt, and they just???? laugh at him?????? What the fuck, kids, why do you all keep abandoning each other in distress in this musical.

Jeremy and Christine actually have really great chemistry though I was like “wow ok I can ship this.” They make you feel it.

When Rich’s WARNING WARNING WARNING goes off he marches out of there in the same robotic way that the Squip marched Jeremy out after his own WARNING alarm after Guy I’d Kinda Be Into. This is further highlighted by the way the Squip marches Jeremy out in the exact same way a few seconds later after reviewing the footage from the evening.

During the Smartphone Hour there were three backup dancers in shiny clothing during the beginning verses with Jenna, Chloe and Brooke, like the old singers used to have.

When Jenna and Chloe sing the chorus that “Rich set a fire” the stage lights go red, orange, yellow and rippling like fire

After the fire, the Squip is full supervillian attire - Black Cloak, LED lights, the works. I couldn’t see it myself because I was too far to see anyone’s faces, but apparently also he gained digital face makeup here?

They really played up the computer effects in The Pitiful Children and The Play - in voices especially. Final Boss Jenna Rolan speaking at Michael at The Play sounded like full computer and not human.

Jeremy’s choreography during The Pitiful Children is super still. He gets shoved to the ground and he just stays frozen there looking up at all the dark squip figures dancing around him. They put him on the staircase and he just stands motionless, staring into the distance while they spin him around and the Squip cradles his head. At the end he lifts the shoebox above his head, but he’s mirroring the Squip’s actions again, like at the mall back before Do You Wanna Ride.

During the Pitiful Children also the Squip keeps putting his hand on top of Jeremy’s head with his fingers splayed like a puppet master. It’s not above Jeremy’s head, it’s resting directly on his skull.

When Jeremy is arguing with his dad before the Pants Song, Mr. Heere has JUST said he’s grounded and scolded him about taking the car (to Jake’s party) and Jeremy just. Very pointedly. Picks up the keys, jangles them in his dad’s face, and says “I’m going out,” like wow fucking slay.

Michael is shredding his Jeremy mementos instead of burning them, presumably because it’s easier for him to carry around a coffee can calling it a shredder than to pull a full Eliza Hamilton and set a fire on the stage (and burn down the house). Mr. Heere still tells him to stop sitting around burning incense though - because of the joint Michael was smoking while shredding all his stuff.

In the play when the Squip activates Jeremy’s kung fu mode to fight Michael, they stage it like a fighting video game with Jeremy enacting ridiculous combo jumpy moves while Michael basically does roll dodges and a cute fighting video game remix of one of the BMC songs plays in the background. I don’t remember which song it was now though.

The Two Player Game reprise involves Michael leap-frogging over Brooke and Chloe and jumping onto Jake’s back and just sitting there for a bit while Jake spins in circles

Michael does not get attacked by Final Boss Jenna? She’s standing on the 2nd level. After tossing the bottle to Jeremy Michael kind of just stands in the same place for the rest of The Play unmolested.

It doesn’t really seem like the Squip actually physically stops Jeremy from drinking the Red? The sound that we’ve been hearing so often this song when the Squip is controlling people isn’t present there. He just yells “you don’t want to do that Jeremy!” and Jeremy just. freezes. and asks why. Like he’s been so conditioned to listen and obey the Squip at this point that even when he’s actively trying to work against it he still knee jerk follows instructions.

The squipped people (except Jeremy) all had LED lights on their shoes during Pitiful Children and The Play. Christine has them too, but when she comes out into the middle of the zombie horde acting normal near the end of The Play, the main stage lights are on so it’s not really noticeable until the reveal that she’s Squipped too and suddenly her shoes are flashing.

The choreography for Guy I’d Kinda Be Into involved Jeremy and Christine slow dancing while everyone walked around them in a circle. They have the same choreography during the reprise, with the obvious implication that because everyone is Squipped now Jeremy can have the exact scenario he was fantasizing about earlier and this time Christine does like him instead of Cho Chang Jake

Everyone shrieks wordlessly and then collapses except for Michael whose yell is more like “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH FUCKKKK!!!!”

After everyone collapses and Michael is standing there terrified the Squip is the only body still moving. He is dragging himself over the fallen bodies of the students as the lights go black.

In the hospital, Rich has NO movement. The full body cast doesn’t even allow him to turn his head to look at Jeremy when’s he’s speaking to him.

Michael does not pull the curtain to hide Rich from view as if that would do anything to stop him from hearing everything they’re saying. It’s not like Rich can so much as turn his head to look at them anyway.

In Voices In My Head, Christine is the one who surges forwards to kiss Jeremy, who is shocked for a second before getting with the program. They stand there and make out for an extended period of time while everyone else cheers and continues singing the song

When the Squip tries to call out to Jeremy he isn’t on the ground level where Jeremy and Christine walk past him. Instead, he stumbles his way along the upper level, where everyone except Jeremy and Christine are lined up, and they all sort of jeer at him and shove at him as he passes like one of those really uncomfortable ending scenes in teen movies where the bully walks down the hallway having everyone in the entire school shove at them and having milk or something poured on them and such in a reflection of one of the main character’s opening scenes.

There was not much dancing in this production at all, which makes sense considering this was only for 1 weekend.

I went to the talk-back too so I will write some about that after getting some sleep

I will try to add to this list if I remember anything else.

[cookinguptales]

How about: "Thistle". Pair: Kermit and Mrs Piggy. Or any ship in Muppet that you like

Well, “thistle” is for “misanthropy”, so honestly there’s really only one ship I could write for. V. short ficlet because I can’t associate these two with anything but snippets.

“You hear about this one, Statler?” Waldorf called from the living room. “They’re interviewing some lady who was stuck up in a tower for a few years.”

Statler thought for a second as he fixed their coffee. He considered putting a big old spoonful of sugar in Waldorf’s mug (blech) just to get that old coot back for nailing his slippers to the floor, but he’d gotten a faceful of hot coffee often enough to know that the payoff probably wouldn’t be worth the pain. So he just kept both their mugs a plain, acrid black as he shuffled back to the living room. And, well, that suited both of them just fine. “Yeah, I heard about her. Romaine or something, right? Don’t know what she’s complaining about. Imagine how easy it’d be to look down on people from way up there!”

“I’ll say!” Waldorf replied, chortling as he took his coffee. “And you wouldn’t have to deal with those darn kids on bicycles up there.”

“Or traffic jams.”

“Or street festivals.”

“Or bears telling jokes!”

They both sighed in unison. Paradise indeed. Statler settled in a little closer, letting his arm bump against Waldorf’s companionably. “So what’s on the agenda today, you old coot?”

“Not much, you old codger. A new movie to complain about, some promising new Youtube stars to heckle – and get this! The bear’s performing at some second-rate comedy club tonight!”

“We can’t miss that,” Statler said. Not even a 200-foot tower could keep them from their responsibility to wear on a middle-aged bear’s self-esteem. Life had to have balance, y’know. Couldn’t let those young upstarts start thinking they had talent and promise and marketability. “What kind of movie is it?”

Waldorf squinted at the calendar on his decrepit old computer screen. “A romantic comedy, I think. We should be able to tear it to pieces.”

Statler snickered as he took a sip of his coffee, just imagining the nasty vlog they’d make. “That does sound romantic.”

“I thought so!” Waldorf said, reaching over to give Statler’s hand a squeeze. “We’ll send those kids home crying. And if they’re tough enough to stand it, we’ll just do it again!”

“You always know just what to say,” Statler said, and despite the wicked grin, he found that he really did mean it. Decades on decades, new hips and old bones and very little hair, and Waldorf still made his rotten heart go pitter-pat every time he got that evil little gleam in his eye.

Not that he’d ever admit it out loud. The only person who needed to know that already did – and Waldorf had put itching powder in his pants to reciprocate. Ah, young love.

This, though, years of annoying habits he’d come to learn as well as his own and the comfortable silence of two souls that knew how to communicate with each other, well. Maybe old love had its perks, too.

Not that he’d ever admit that, either. Love was a four letter word in this house, and for good reason. Misanthropy was the name of the game, and if they both happened to have one exception… Who needed to know?

[p-artsypants]

320 State Street- (8) July 16, 2016

A03 | FF.Net

Previous

—

The drinking song in the last chapter is a slightly re-written translation of ‘Fela Igjen’, by Alexander Rybak. I don’t know why I forgot to put that in the author’s notes on the last chapter…(maybe because I wrote the chapter at 2am in the middle of a party…)

—

“So this lady comes up to the counter and starts putting her stuff up. It was like, spray paint and caulk and sandpaper…stuff like that.” Astrid sat at a table in Hiccup’s basement. Heather, Fishlegs, and Eret listened and waited for Hiccup. “I was halfway through typing in her items when I noticed the guy before me had left his coffee on the counter.”

“People are lazy.” Fishleg’s shrugged.

“Ah, but that’s not worst part! The woman saw where I was looking, reached over, grabbed the coffee and finished it off.”

“She didn’t!” Heather objected.

“I swear to god, she did!”

“That’s the nastiest thing I’ve ever heard!”

“Alright guys,” Hiccup stated, coming into the room. He balanced a laptop in one hand and had a broad selection of snacks in the other. “My mom has two hours free and she’s going to join us.”

“Join us? But she’s in…” Astrid sentence got cut short as Hiccup placed the laptop on the table.

Valka Haddock, a beautiful and wise mother showed on the screen. She smiled. “So you’re Astrid? Hiccup’s told me a lot about you!”

Said boy in reply blushed. “Soooo does everyone have their character sheets?”

Everyone nodded, except Astrid.

Fishlegs organized his notes then held a blank sheet of paper out to Astrid. “So, since you’ve never played before, you’ll need to make your character.”

“Okay.”

“What do you want to be? Human? Elf? Gnome?” Hiccup looked pointedly at Heather.

“Well…what do we have?”

Hiccup spoke in a deep Scottish voice, one which Astrid recognized as the voice he used to imitate his dad. “I am Sho’gath the mighty, son of Ogro’Sherk, and wielder of axes.” Then he used his regular voice. “I’m a true neutral Orc.”

“Okay, what does ‘true neutral’ mean?”

“It’s an alignment. Lawful Good all the way down to Chaotic Evil. It just determines what kind of decisions you’re going to make. Are you always going to do the right thing and follow the rules, or are you going to mess everything up?”

“Oh, I get it.” She nodded.

“I’m a beautiful elven ranger. And I’m Neutral good.” Eret explained, holding up a scribble of a blonde woman.

Valka spoke from the computer, “I’m Magro Thiadim, a gentle giant.”

“I’m a dashing rogue named Cazriel, and I have an monkey companion named Steve the Well Trained.” Fishlegs frowned right after, "but since I'm leading the campaign, you won't get to see me in action."

Then Heather finished, “I’m a 200 year old mage that looks like a 15 year old boy, and I’m mute, illiterate, and eat rocks.”

“You must be fun to play with.” Astrid laughed.

“She’s not.” Everyone else responded.

“Well, now I have a lot of options. Can I be anything?”

“Basically.”

“I want to be an Angel.”

Fishlegs and Hiccup looked at each other, seemingly having a unspoken conversation. “Well, you could…but it’s really hard to play as one.” Fishlegs finally admitted. “Might I suggest a paladin?”

“Depends, what’s a paladin?”  

“Do you know anything about Dungeons and Dragons?!” He asked snippily.

She replied, just as snippily. “I know only nerds play it.”

“Guess you’re a nerd now,” Hiccup shrugged.  

“You’re damn straight.”

“Darn. Darn straight.” He corrected.

“Okay, well a Paladin is a holy knight. They get a animal to mount that they share an empathic link with. But they can only be Lawful Good. So they always have to do the right thing.”

Astrid shrugged. “Doesn’t sound too far from real life. I’ll do it.” Then she snapped her fingers. “My mount can be a giant bird! It’ll grasp onto my shoulders and carry me.”

“What kind of bird?” Asked Hiccup. “Are you just going to make it Stormfly?”

“No, I can be a little creative.” She laughed. “I’ll make it a potoo.”

The table went quiet. “What’s a potoo?”

She pulled out her phone and went to Google. “It’s this bird that’s really derpy, it looks like a living muppet.”

She found a picture and held it up. Sure enough, the bird did look like a living muppet. It had big yellow eyes that bugged out on either sides of it’s head.

“That’s terrifying.” Hiccup cringed.

“His name is Gary.”

“Your character?”

“No, my bird.” She stated it like it was obvious. “I still have to think of a name for my character.”

“Well,” Fishlegs began, looking at his notes. “How about Hiccup helps her set up her character while I set the scene.”

“Okay.”

He cleared his throat and spoke to the rest of the group. “You arrive at the Western dock of the town of Kolasiet. One ship leaves every third morning and returns every third night. To the South, there is a huge hill. In front of you, there are houses, a tavern, a trader who does business inside the tavern, a blacksmith, a church, a jail, and an elder who acts as a healer and a seer.

“To the North, there is an ornate, beautiful manor on the hill. It’s large and spectacular, but not as grand as the castle.

“To the East, there is a large castle up on the mountain. It is covered with ivy and there are lights in the windows. The castle is in ill repair, but looks habited. There’s a huge rose maze around the outside and heavy iron gates at the base of the hill.”

“Good start.” Eret commented. “I’ll go into town.”

Valka and Heather followed.

“People you talk to are pretty down trodden and poor, tell you to go to the Tavern.”

“To the Tavern then!”

“Okay,” announced Astrid. “I have my character. Now how do I play the game?”

Fishlegs groaned.

Hiccup explained, “it’s a roleplaying game. The DM, Fishlegs, will tell the story and you move your character within the story to finish it.”

“Okay…” she followed so far.

“As an example,” Fishlegs stated, “say you’re in the woods and there are trees all around you, except for a cave. Where do you want to go?”

“Well, to the cave. Seeing as it’s basically the only place to go.”

“Alright, inside the cave is a pile of bones.”

“Lovely.”

“On top of the bones, theres a dead carcass of a mystical being called a beholder. You see something sparkling in it’s eye.”

“I want to look at the sparkling thing.”

Fishlegs smiled. “You have found beauty in the eye of the beholder.”

Astrid scrunched up her nose. “Well, it’s been fun, but I’m leaving.”

“No! Wait! Don’t leave! It was a joke!!!” He begged.

—

The group had entered the tavern, where they met up with a paladin with a bird mount. Everyone else in the tavern was just as sad and pathetic as the people outside. Maybe even more so, since they were drunk of their asses. Only the trader, Joe, was in a cheerful mood. No doubt hopeful that he’d get some actual business. Joe admitted that he’d been in the town three days, and couldn’t wait to get out. Whatever was effecting these people was very serious and if the group of rag-tag fighter’s knew better, they’d leave soon too. They bought several drinks and items and talked to the bartender. A goat looking man with a mustache down hanging down to his nipples.

—

“Gobber?”

“Gobber.”

—

“Several months ago, we were prosperous. The castle was inhabited by a beautiful and kind fairy. She had magnificence gossamer wings and hair that shone in the sun like gold. Daily, she’d come into our town and grace us with her humble presence. She was also very wealthy, more wealthy then even the mayor, but she was generous and gave gold to whoever needed it, but always with the warning, ‘do not take what is not given to you’. But then…one day, the sky turned gray and all the gold that was given to us from the fairy, turned to coal. Great for heating our homes, mind you, but we were left nearly desolate. The mayor spread what wealth he could, but he was also depleted of his riches.  An unknown disease spread over the people and took lives. Where once riches flowed, now only sadness like a sprinkler of agony. I’m sure if our gold was restored to us, there would be a handsome reward to those responsible.”

At the word ‘reward’ the group prepared to do what it took to restore the town to it’s glory.

And so the group explored the town, talking to various people, including the mayor, elder, healer, and some guards.

Finally, they snuck up to the castle gate.

Two gargoyles sat on the top of the gate, watching them as they approached.

“Halt! Who goes there?” One asked.

The massive orc, with the same amount to tact as brains, spoke, “I am Sho’gath the Mighty and you will let me in this gate!”

“We do not let outsiders in, you do not have the key.”

—

Astrid snarled. “Well, then what are we supposed to do? Everyone we talked to made it seem like the Castle was the place to go!” She crossed her arms. “This game is dumb.”

Hiccup chuckled. “It’s supposed to be a challenge. Or else we’d finish it in an hour.”

Astrid checked the time on her phone. An hour and a half had passed, and they were no where near done. “How long is it supposed to take?”

“Two to three weeks, depending.” Fishlegs shrugged.

“You do realize I have a life and a job, right?”

“Relax”, charmed Heather. “We play three to four hours at a time.”

Astrid rubbed her temples. “I’ve played monopoly games shorter than this.”

—

A Paladin, Orc, Mage, Giant, and an Elf sneak into a jail.

Sounds like a joke right?

The guards proved to be a challenge, but the Orc did most of the work. Each one of the prisoners were interviewed, some being more impactful then the rest. The gentle giant, Magro Thiadim, was fiercely disturbed by what a shady man had to say to him. And so he left the town, and wandered onto the beach.

—

It was then that the game reached it’s second hour, and Valka had to leave.

The rest of the team had no plans for the rest of the day. Astrid was now invested.

—

The last prisoner they interviewed was a young woman. She had black hair, yellow eyes and a sickly complexion.  She explained that she was once the fairy in the castle, but she was ambushed one day and her wings were ripped off. Now the castle belonged to the evil that stole her wings and if the town was to go back to normal, they had to get her wings back.

The fairy gave the group a vile of her blood as the key to get in the gate.

—

“Okay, before we storm the castle, does anyone need to take a break?”

“Yes!”

Hiccup stood, picking up his glass. “Can I get anyone something to drink?”

“I’m going to need a hard drink to get through the rest of this.” Laughed Eret.

“Me too!” Joined Heather.

Astrid stood as well, “I’ll come with you Hiccup. I’m getting a leg cramp.”

The rest of the group started chatting about some TV show Astrid hadn’t had the time to see yet as she followed him upstairs.

“So…you like this kind of stuff?”

“What?”

“The…lord of the rings, fantasy stuff.”

“Yeah, it’s okay. I really really like dragons though.”

“Dragons, huh?”

“Yeah, if I could. I’d have a pet dragon. I’d have twenty.”

She laughed. “You couldn’t live here in a wooden house then.”

He chuckled along with her. “No, I guess I couldn’t.”

“But an Orc though? I would never have expected Sho’gath to be your character.”

Hiccup snorted. “He’s a joke character, don’t read too far into it. I made myself true neutral so I could do whatever I wanted. We’re fighting an army of zombies to save an orphanage? If there’s a reward involved, I’ll do it. But if there’s a bank next door, you better believe I’m robbing it.”

“That’s terrible.”

“Exactly. I’d never do that in real life, it’s just fun to pretend.”

Toothless lazily basked in the sun on his back. Stormfly burrowed into his tummy fur. The duo walked past and gave their respected pets pats and scratches, then headed to the kitchen.

“Are you having a fun time?”

“Hm?”

“You seemed kind of annoyed when we started…if you aren’t having fun then—“

She slammed her hand down on the table. “I’m having a great time!”

He jumped.

“Look, it wasn’t really my cup of tea at first, but I’m really enjoying myself now. Honestly.” She made her way over to the fridge and pulled out two beers. “But to be frank…look, I don’t want to dump my burdens on you…”

He leaned against the counter. “I’m always happy to be an ear for you. You…don’t have it easy. I can’t imagine being on my own without the help of at least one parent. And taking care of one, no less.”

“I’ve gotten used to it.” She smirked. “Anyway…I don’t have a lot of friends. I didn’t really keep in contact with the ones from High School and I didn’t make a lot of friends at Yale…So, I really appreciate you inviting me to these things. It’s nice to kick back with friends, you know?”

“Actually,” he smiled. “Fishlegs was the one who extended the invitation to you. He thought you might like the story he was planning.”

“Huh. Well, that son of a gun.”

“But, you’re always welcome to come over, whenever you want. I like you, Astrid.”

“I like you too, Hiccup.”

—

After a maze of living shrubs filled with man eating flowers and sentient statues, the orc, paladin, elf, and mage finally arrived at the castle door. With the fairy’s blood, the door opened to them easily.

Though evil lurked in the walls, the group spread out and searched the castle. Some found weapons, others, spells. But the paladin was the one who found the first journal entry.

“I arrived in the town of Kolasiet. It’s quiet, but teeming with life and untapped wealth. Everything seems so bountiful, great food, happy people. It’s almost amazing that there are not more people here. I ventured up to the castle, where lush Roses grew around the entrance. Though, as I approached them, the roses came to life and barred my entry. I sat on the bridge and waited for someone to come by, and sure enough, a beautiful fairy with red, silken wings fluttered toward me. I had never seen a fairy before, but she was awfully nice. She has invited me to stay in the castle with her, seeing my interest in the architecture. I believe I will enjoy my stay.”

—

“So, who wrote the journal?”

“That’s part of the puzzle!” Explained Fishlegs. “You have to figure out who wrote it and why.”

She sighed. “Is this part of the main quest? Or is this a side thing that we get to do?”

“Well…it’s kind of crucial to know what happened, but you don’t need it to beat the dungeon.”

She looked at her phone. They had been playing for four hours now. “How many floors do we have left?”

“Besides this one, two.”

Her head connected with the table.

—

In the study, the elf found the next journal entry.

“Nearly as soon as I got inside, I started sketching what I could. My hands have never worked that fast. I’m sure the Fairy had never see someone so frantic. She loaned me her study, with the promise that I would make better use of it than her. The Library is one room over and has more books then I had ever seen in my life. I could travel until the day I die, and still not learn as much as I would from those books. The Fairy, Aster, she calls herself, seems to enjoy my company. I presented my inventions and their functions and she was delighted, though I believe she didn’t care for the flying machines, since she has such magnificent wings. I might just stay here instead of returning home to Lunesti. I’m sure father would love that. Four years is a long time to be away. I often wonder if they get my letters, they never write me back. I digress. I’m in an enchanted castle!”

—

“Aster?” Astrid deadpanned. “Really?”

“It means ‘star,’ for your information!” Fishlegs defended. “Besides, I starting writing this before I knew you. So it’s not intentional.”

“Fair enough.”

Another hour passed and Astrid’s phone died.

—

On the stairs to the third floor, it was the mage this time that found a piece of paper.

—

Fishlegs passed the notecard to Heather, who in turn gave it to Astrid.

“Wait, why do I get it?”

“Because I can’t read!” Heather stated. “Remember?”

Astrid scoffed and read out loud.  

“My dearest Aster,

It is with a heavy heart that I tell you I have to leave. I have gotten word that my hometown has been destroyed. I must go and find out for myself. I wanted to tell you in person, but I am a coward. Leaving here is hard enough. I have a strange regard to you, which there is a chain connected to both of our ribs, and with distance the chain will pull and I would take to bleeding inwardly. I will take nothing with me but the key you lent me, with the promise to bring it back soon. Hopefully, I can sustain these wounds long enough to pay my respects. You have often said you do not receive gifts from others, so I leave you with my greatest possession: My heart. Nowhere will feel like home without you. I love you, Aster, most earnestly.

Your faithful friend,

Henry.”

Everyone paused to look at Fishlegs.

“What? Henry is a good name!”

Astrid looked smugly over to Hiccup and sang, “Someone’s in love with a fairy!”

“You had to use my name, Fish?”

“For the sake of the integrity of the game, yes, I did.”

Hiccup chuckled awkwardly, and looked at his phone. “Well, it’s 9 o’clock and there’s one more floor left. Are we pulling an all nighter?”

Something clicked in the back of Astrid’s mind. “Wait…I think I was supposed to do something ate 8…”

“Was it feed Stormfly? Because you already did…”

“No, it wasn’t that.” She furrowed her brow in thought. “Oh god, what was it?”

Suddenly, she stood, knocking the chair away from her with a clatter. “I was supposed to meet Scott!!”

Henry gasped too as he stood. “We’ll finish this up next week! You get going!”

“Thanks for understanding! See you guys later!” She nearly ran to the door. “Oh, and Fishlegs. Thanks for letting me join! I had too much fun!”

—

Astrid sped home. Traffic laws be damned, she lived twenty-five minutes away from Hiccup. But she made it in fifteen. She’d never be this lucky again.

She hopped out of her jeep and hurried to the door. “I’m home!” She called to her roommate. “But just for a second, then I’m leaving again!”

She burst into her room and turned on the light, then jumped a mile high.

Scott was sitting on her bed, glowering with a white hot rage.

“What-how—I thought—!” She stammered. She had practiced what she was going to say to him, but they all flew out her ears at the sight of him.

“You didn’t answer my texts or my calls.” He stated.

“My phone died.” She fished it out of her pocket and held it out to him as proof. “I swear to God that I didn’t mean to ditch you. I was at a friend’s house and we were playing Dungeons and Dragons and—“

He laughed. That was a good sign, right? “You were playing what?”

“Dungeons and Dragons…” She repeated, quietly.

The anger was still there, but he looked embarrass as he stood. “You’re telling me…that you left me alone in that restaurant, by myself, because you were playing that…that stupid, weird game? Are you serious?!”

“Scott, I swear I didn’t mean to do that to you!”

“I can’t believe you!” He shouted, startling her. “Do you know how humiliating that was? I waited there for an hour, and you never showed! People kept looking over at me an whispering. It was horrible, Astrid!”

Astrid reddened slightly, hating the feeling of being in the wrong. But she was also a fighter, and in this situation, it wasn’t really a good trait to have. Her nose flared. “Now you know how I feel.”

His eyes widened. “What?”

She raised her head defiantly to meet his eyes. “You heard me. You’ve done this kind of shit to me before. But there are times I’ve waited more than an hour for you to show up.”

He ground his teeth. “Me not showing up is different, Astrid!”

“And how is that?”

“I’m very busy! I don’t have a lot of time to spare for you! Sometimes, things happen, and I hate having my time wasted!”

She poked his chest, “And you think I enjoy sitting around waiting for you?!” Her hands clenched into a fist as her anger mounted. Honestly, this argument was a long time coming. “You are the most conceited, oblivious, self-centered—“

His fist connecting with her face hurt more then she could fathom. Sure, he was strong. But never before had he hit her. Violence was something she sensed in him, but she never imagined he’d resort to it.

“You don’t get to speak to me like that, Astrid!” He shouted, his voice hurting her throbbing head.

She in turn clenched her fist and wound up, preparing to fight back.

But she didn’t.

Scott wasn’t the type to just take a punch. They’d volley back and forth until someone was unconscious. It had to end with her, so she took a deep breath and let her anger go.

And it was hard.

“You hit me.” She stated, plainly.

“You deserved it!” He shot back. “I will not stand here and have you yell and berate me with this is your goddamn fault.”

Again, she kept her anger at bay. “I’m sorry I yelled at you. I’m sorry I was late.” It felt like poison in her mouth as she spoke.

Hearing her apology, Scott’s rage began to subside. Without her fight, he had nothing to feed on and began to cool down. “I…” He looked away from her, “I’m sorry I hit you. You…didn’t deserve it.” It sounded like he didn’t entirely believe it. But she’d accept it.

“It won’t happen again,” she offered a smile.

“It won’t happen again,” he agreed. He swallowed thickly and shook his head. “Uh…I should probably go before…well, I’m still kind of hurt…”

“Okay. Maybe it’s for the best.” She sighed a shaky breath. “Drive safe.”

“Yeah…put some ice on that.” He shouldered past her and went to the door. “I’ll see you later.”

“Later,” she assured, half-heartedly.

Maybe when later came, he’d realize how stupid and awful he was and really apologize.

It would be nice, but it wasn’t realistic.

—

The paladin ascended to the top floor alone. Waiting in the audience chamber, was a werewolf, huge and black.

The knight raised her sword to defend herself, while the beast roared in anguish.

She ran full force, blade at the ready, and delivered a blow to the heart.

What the paladin didn’t know, was that the werewolf was an enemy she was never supposed to fight alone. It grabbed her by the legs in one hand, and her arms in the other.

With little effort, she was ripped in half.