#thecandylady | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mirandasvstheworld · 9 years

Text

Blue Meth, Grandfather Eagle, and a Cave Hotel; or New Mexico: Part 2

-Ally Miranda

We woke up early, eager to explore the hangouts of our favorite Breaking Bad characters. Our route was set to explore Walter’s home, Hank’s home, Jesse’s apartment, Jesse’s parents’ home, the car wash, Tuco’s headquarters, the dog house, Gus’ meth lab, and Los Pollos Hermanos. Every place looked just like it did in the show, and it was incredible to stand on the same ground as Walter White and friends.

Hank and Marie’s neighborhood was my absolute favorite. The houses were on upscale, enormous plots of land with colorful Southwestern designs, rock gardens, and mountains enveloping the neighborhood in their grandiose embrace. My heart skipped a beat when I came to the realization that this was my dream neighborhood and a place I would strive to live in one day.

After our tour, we drove to Old Town to explore beautiful Native American jewelry, indulge in Southwestern food, and visit The Candy Lady – the supplier of the blue meth candy for Breaking Bad. Walking through Old Town was a dream for me.

The houses and shops were vibrant and adorned with fresh red chile pepper bundles, kokopelli paintings, and iridescent hanging balloons. I walked around a corner, and there he was on a wooden sign in the distance: an ancient eagle with the name Grandfather Eagle below. I smiled stupidly to myself and decided he would be our destiny on this trip and the symbol of our journey through America. Every time we’d see an eagle on the trip after this, we’d hail him as “Grandfather Eagle.”

We arrived at The Candy Lady and were instantly greeted by an eccentric man who complimented our touristy breaking bad shirts. He handed us a prop hat and apron and told us to get ready for our “drug deal” and to get some money out. Taken aback, Dan grabbed a few dollars, and we changed into the required outfits. The man prompted us to do a bunch of silly poses and staged a drug deal with the blue meth candy and took a few great pictures of us.

Hysterically laughing, we walked inside the shop to meet the candy lady herself, who was smiling genuinely behind the counter. We tried samples of red and green chile fudge that was beyond delicious. The candy lady, the sweetest woman in the world, talked to us about our trip and kindly helped us find an interesting route to our next destination. She then recommended an authentic Mexican restaurant for us to finally try authentic green and red chile.

We walked into Los Compadres and were pleased to see that the restaurant was flooded with Hispanic clientele and slightly clean ripped booths. We knew that this hole in the wall was exactly what would produce the best food in town. Man, were we right. I got red chile chicken enchiladas, while Dan ordered Christmas-style (red and green chile) carnitas sopapillas. Remembering how delicious these were is making my mouth water as I write. We indulged and enjoyed our meal with spicy tears in our eyes until we were too full to go on.

Then a surprise! The waitress walked up with a massive smile on her face, carrying a heaping serving of dessert sopapillas doused in local honey, and yelled out, “Happy honeymoon.” We gave each other an “oh shit” look, knowing the extent of our fullness, but we graciously accepted the gift. Stuffed, we drudgingly enjoyed the sopapillas, and I realized they were everything I wished the beignets at Cafe Du Monde had been. They were delicate, and the warm honey paired with them perfectly. Why did we have to be so full to enjoy one of the best desserts of life? We happily rolled each other out of the restaurant and waved goodbye to amazing Albuquerque.

After a chill two-hour drive, we arrived at the Albertsons in Farmington, N.M., to stock up on dinner for the cave hotel. We bought local cheeses, veggies, peppered sausage, and hatch chile wine in preparation for our romantic night. We met the manager and her sister at her beautiful home before driving up to the cave. She loaded up her pickup truck, and the women led us to the mountain where the cave was located. As we followed her truck up the steep mountain, I realized I was losing control of the wheel.

The next moment, our wheels began sliding out of control on the sandy path. There was no traction, and the wheels on our car were clearly not meant to drive up a dirt mountain road. I braked, and we were stuck on a huge rock underneath the sand. I tried to pump the gas, and the tires scraped the sand while the car stood still. We had to call the women for help with the walkie-talkies they provided for us. After five minutes of the car going nowhere, I put the car in neutral while Dan and the ladies pushed the car up until I made it past the rock. There was still no traction, and the car slid out of control; it felt as though the car would flip over at any moment. The manager had the great idea to take the car off the sandy path and to off-road it up the side of the mountain, which was equally terrifying, but I was willing to do anything at that point. Once we were off the sandy path, it was difficult, but we made it all the way up the steep mountain to the top, where our cave destination was located.

The view at the top was breathtaking – the dark-orange sun setting in the distance, a sight worth our little drive from hell. The women hugged us, happy to see us alive and up the mountain. We took a swift but taxing hike down to the cave, which was built 70 feet below ground by a local geologist.

We entered the cave through a sliding glass door, and our hearts leapt with excitement. The cave hotel was surprisingly luxurious: grooved limestone walls covered in kokopelli art, funky furniture, and all the amenities of a five-star resort. There was a gorgeous bedroom with a cozy bed covered in a heart of rose petals for our honeymoon, a beautiful kitchen stocked with goodies, delicious fuzzy bathrobes, a fire pit, a dining area, and an enormous bathroom with a hand-built natural hot tub with a waterfall. The place was like a little house – two times bigger than our apartment. We wished we had spent our entire honeymoon here at this point. It was too good to be true.

The ladies left a honeymoon card, chocolates, wine, and flowers for us in the kitchen. We thanked them and hugged them goodbye, curious to explore the cave deeper. There were tiny stones everywhere, decorated by previous guests, so we grabbed a rock and colored one to add our own art to the cave. We enjoyed our chile wine and cheese, blasted Pink Floyd, and paraded around happily in our bathrobes all night. It was magical.

The next morning, I woke up to the sight of a fuzzy tail wagging outside the sliding glass door. There were squirrels and chipmunks everywhere, fighting over the kibble left for them outside. We sat on the floor and watched them play and argue over their breakfast. We then cut up fresh fruit, pastries, and brewed coffee for our last meal in the cave. We left sadly, and white-knuckled a scary yet manageable drive back down the mountain. We drove back into the lonely desert, ready to encounter what Arizona had in store for us that day.

Stay tuned for why we were not ready for what Arizona had in store for us that day.

-Ally

#newmexico #kokopellicave #albuquerque #oldtownalbuquerque #thecandylady #hatchchilewine #americaroadtrip #mirandasvstheusa

0 notes