#the writers certainly couldn't
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Hold on, I actually have something to say about Lucky Spencer, his recasts, and the punishment of actors through character assassination.
Under a read more because I have A LOT to say:
For some reason, every January for the last few years, I watch clips of General Hospital - sometimes storylines I've seen before, and sometimes stories I want to see for the first time. This January I decided on Lucky (JJ) and Elizabeth, and I've watched every scene of theirs I could find from '97 to '99 and '09 to '11. I'd seen a few of their older scenes, a bit more of their recent scenes, but it was my first time watching everything from the beginning. Two months later and I'm still thinking about them, how sweet they were together as teens, and how the writers ruined them over and over again.
My first memory of watching GH was with my older sister, and it just so happened to be the episode in '99 with Lucky's funeral and the reveal that he was alive. As a lover of angst, I was enthralled. I wanted to know what happened next. Now in hindsight, that was truly the end for them. Sometimes I feel like Lucky died in that fire and he never came back. Lucky said it himself in a scene with Luke in '10 - "Elizabeth and I never recovered from that fire," and he was right. And it is so disappointing to me. A small part of me almost wishes I didn't know how good they were then, so that I never learned how far they'd fallen.
The characters as teenagers were beautiful together. They were IN LOVE, and they sold it, and had better chemistry than almost any characters I've ever seen. I know this is a soap opera and almost no one is allowed to stay married to one person, much less with their high school sweetheart, but I just wish they hadn't done so much deliberate, irreparable damage to this couple. And for what?
From the wiki I read recently, Jonathan Jackson wanted to leave as early as '96 or '97 and they convinced him to stay, which I'm grateful he did so we could get the Liz/Lucky story. I hate that he left, and really dislike recasts in general, but I would never begrudge an actor for wanting to move on from a soap opera, even if I miss them. And to expect an 11-year-old actor to commit to a lifetime as one character is ridiculous. He wanted to leave again in '11, and while that was incredibly disappointing, I understand why he did.
He's said in interviews that he wanted to work with Tony and Becky, and have Liz and Lucky reunite, and have lighter stories. I know actors rarely get a say in their storylines, that they've gotta shut up and do the work they're given, and I get that. But considering those requests were the whole reason he even agreed to come back in the first place, why did they apparently agree when they had no intention of following through? So he left, which was within his right to do. Creators/producers/writers don't have to cater to actors' wants, but then they shouldn't act surprised when the actor leaves when they've lied to get them in the door. So yeah, I don't blame him for leaving, and I'm happy for him that he got Nashville soon after.
Unfortunately, now Lucky has since been punished for this. They turned him into a deadbeat dad who doesn't see his kids. They absolutely did not have to do that. They could so easily say he talks to them at least once a week on the phone, that he sees them every few months, and sends them gifts on their birthdays. It might not be perfect but at least it's not the complete abandonment of his children. Jax was allowed an offscreen relationship with Josslyn, so why can't Lucky? It's so out of character for him to do this and the writers' motives are so transparent to me.
And frankly, I feel like they've been ruining Lucky since the first time JJ left. After running out of JJ scenes to watch, I finally grit my teeth and watched some scenes with the recasts. I watched some of JY's Lucky return storyline. The actor was fine I guess, but I didn't buy him as Lucky, and the chemistry with Liz just wasn't there anymore. I hate the brainwashing stuff and how he no longer loved Elizabeth. If I'd been watching this live then, I probably would've quit because that is NOT the story I would've wanted to see with these characters.
GV's Lucky is even worse. I'm sure the actor is good in other things but that character was definitely not Lucky. I mostly blame the writing, but every time I see him, I say aloud to myself, "I do not know this man." Lucky would not be a cop. From some scenes I've seen, he was controlling and downright mean to Elizabeth. He was so unlikable and annoying. While the drug addiction storyline is good for drama and a challenge for actors, I just don't buy that as a story for Lucky, and definitely not the cheating. Again, it's just so very out of character that I simply don't think of that man as Lucky - that rage-filled, Dudley Do Right cuckhold? I realize this sounds really harsh, and yes there were some nice moments too (I begrudgingly admit their 2005 wedding was very sweet) but for me the bad far outweighed the good. I don't know what the character (and actors) of Lucky did to deserve such character assassination
It's very telling to me that the moment JJ returned, Lucky was allowed to be smart again. Competent at his job. To actually be respected by the other characters. What a concept, huh? There's no way JJ would've returned to that mess of a character otherwise. I agree that it's fucked up that GV was fired and that JJ was told that GV moved on of his own volition, but I'm glad JJ returned for the time he did, even though they had no idea what to do with him.
Siobhan? She was fine at first but then became shrill. And she was just the rebound girl he never should've married. The Balkan storyline was definitely not one of their best. Lucky's exit - which both JJ and Tony complained about - by having Lucky leave his kids just before Christmas to go talk to some rocks? Wtf were they thinking? An actor leaves and they no longer have any obligation to make a satisfying conclusion for fans, I guess. The Liz/Nik affair was so gross to me. I don't know a lot about Becky's firing, but they clearly wanted to punish her and her character too before getting rid of her. While I hate what Liz did, I don't hate the character, because they clearly had some kind of vendetta against Becky to want to trash her character so thoroughly. And I understand that's even the nature of soap operas - that everyone gets the chance to fuck up and do unforgivable things - and I guess that's just an aspect of soaps that I absolutely hate. That some characters aren't allowed to stay good and true to themselves for the sake of drama and who's the daddy storylines.
I know there are GH fans now, and probably many back then, who are sick of LL2 and want Liz to move on. And that's fair. But I'm also sure that there were so many people who wanted them back together, especially after JJ returned. I was one of them. What an absolute waste of history and chemistry. Jonathan and Becky both wanted it. A lot of the fans wanted it. They didn't even have to keep them together forever - soap couples never last - but to NEVER allow these characters any happiness together when we finally had JJ back is one of the biggest fumbles I've ever seen. They ruined the characters a long time ago, and they ruined this couple yet again. And I'll never forgive that.
I want JJ to come back as Lucky, I always will, even if it's just for a little while. He probably won't, and why would he after last time? I don't want a recast but if they decided to then maybe I'd give him a chance, only because I want them to stop trashing the character. But honestly whoever they cast probably still won't be Lucky to me - JJ IS Lucky, and some characters just can't be recast. I'm trying to make my peace with that, and with the fact that the last time we saw the REAL Lucky and Liz happy together was back in 1999. The showrunner and writers at the time had the rare opportunity to fix that in 2010 and chose not to do it. Why? I could never guess.
#general hospital#lucky spencer#LL2#jonathan jackson#lucky x elizabeth#LnL2#i know nobody will read this but i need to say it anyway#i'm not here to argue about it i'm just stating how i feel so#if this seems intense it's actually not that serious i've just been hyperfixating on gh for the last 2 months#i mean i believe everything i'm saying but i'll be chill again soon i just needed to vent#anyway i've been writing lucky fic because i can fix him#the writers certainly couldn't#lucky spencer deserved so much better#jj got his 2 emmys and fuckin dipped and good for him
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touya dying and endeavor living with basically zero consequences IS wild tho
#dabi#touya todoroki#like all the league dying presumably because hori couldn't figure out how to redeem them but makes us watch a full redemption#for a dude that practiced eugenics on his kids and beat and raped his wife was certainly a narrative choice#and not once but TWICE did a child abuser get redemption#writer to writer I really am so curious why chisaki was saved but not touya shiggy or toga#who are arguably more popular and narratively important overall#so many extremely strange decisions going on in this ending I can't even be depressed anymore I'm just confused
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Aang being a shitty dad is fine, but it's the way tlok makes Aang a shitty I have a problem with. You're telling me a guy who's entire culture was whipped out and whole family was massacred wasn't overjoyed at the possibility of sharing his culture with his entire family?
Would Aang have given more attention to Tenzin? Probably, them being the only airbenders would have almost certainly fostered a complex dynamic between the two— even to the extent that it would damage the father/son relationship. I think it's also worth pointing out that Aang was raised in a culture without the nuclear family dynamic we see him participarting in with Katara and their kids, and it's not out of the realm of possibility that Aang would fall short of the expectations and responibilities being a typical father figure brings especially when he himself never experienced that dynamic. Especially, especially compounded with the task of rebuilding a struggling world and maintaining peace.
However, do I think he would neglect to show his kids his culture? Their culture? No. Certainly not the extent he did, and especially not when we see how excited he is to share it with his friends in the show. Why wouldn't he be excited to share it with his kids? With all his kids? How the writers of The Legend of Korra make him a bad dad is a complex series of failures not the least of which stem from racism, the unwillingness to even attempt an understanding of multicultural families, TLOK originally being a 12 episode miniseries that then got greenlit for another season and was suddenly taxed with building upon a world that was never intended to exist beyond its original scope, and a fundamental misunderstanding of Aang as a character.
tldr:
#he probably would have been a kinda shitty dad just Not Like That#and while were here#why is bumi portrayed as essentially cultureless? certainly there were non benders in the air nomads#and why does the show act like only Bolin is from the earth nation and Mako from the fire nation?#because these white! creators fundamentally do not understand what living in a multicultural household is like#and were completely incurious to what the experience might've been like for these characters#and again. to harp on the whole building upon a world that was never intended to exist outside its original premise thing#that's why the writing gets weaker in the second season and picks back up in the third#these writers are clearly talented but so obviously fumbled when it came to expanded on these characters#who were written for a short quick one off series and then suddenly had to exist outside of that#all of the arcs and story beats were pretty one note and quick because book 1 is a full complete story#that's why only book 1 ties into the name conventions of atla#because all of the legend of korra was originally built to just be book one#and then suddenly your stuck with this story that you had completely wrapped up#and characters who now have to be expanded beyond what they were intended to be#and the writers very clearly could not do that. that's why Aang being a shitty dad comes out of left field almost.#and why none of the villains tie into each other until the very end with a quick little explanation#and it's also why the world building is so much weaker than atla#atla was know for it's compelling world building and dynamic side characters None of which exist in tlok#or well. they do! in a much smaller diluted form.#because functionally the story is still trapped in the original confines of the first season#and also trapped in the back there is 50% less content every season#no time to experience a small village in the fire nation! we gotta get to plot!#no time to flesh out the comic relief character!! plot! gotta get to the plot!!#and they couldn't even make that plot good in the second season.#atla#tlok#aang
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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: CSI: Miami Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Tim Speedle, Horatio Caine, Calleigh Duquesne, Eric Delko, Ryan Wolfe Additional Tags: Fix-It, Canon Rewrite, Canon-Typical Violence, Crime Scenes, Gunshot Wounds, Blood and Injury Summary:
After Speed is shot on duty, the team works to catch the people responsible and hopefully aid in his recovery while worrying that his old weapon cleaning habits may not have died after all. Call it a fix it because Speed doesn't go down like that, not in my heart.
#csi miami#csi miami fic#tim speedle#horatio caine#calleigh duquesne#eric delko#frostys fics#did anyone ask for a fix it fic for an episode of television that's nearly 20 years old? no? Too bad#i couldn't let this crime slide. the writers have committed a lot of crimes through 5 seasons so far but this one required action#certainly did not have me writing a csi miami fic on my bingo card but here we are
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#“maybe he's lonely” and then seasmoke finds a new partner at the same time rhaenyra finds a new partner in mysaria.... much to consider.
House of the Dragon | 2.03 "The Burning Mill" dir. Geeta Patel
#awwww#i also clued in that it was about rhaenyra at the time#i just couldn't have anticipated mysaria filling that void for her#certainly not in a gay way :p#very sweet#i'm very partial to sincerity so i was pleasantly surprised that it felt sincere - that it seemed intended as such#call me a square but i'd been dreading that it would be merely manipulative - i loathe how often that's the only angle of female queerness#we'll see how it develops - for now there's conflicting creative commentary about it#obviously on a tragic dramatic show like this it is always gonna be complex - just wondering what the narrative Function will be#going from a spur of the moment earnest welling up of desire and connection - enriching interiority for both characters#- to a lead writer saying it's cause to Complicate things and that it's 'gonna be a problem'... hm hm hm we'll see#house of the dragon
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daily kestrel 109:
work was mostly chill today, except for the fire alarm that happened as most of the building was getting their kids down for nap. it was not a drill, it was accidentally set off by the people working on the heating systems in the attic, so we were definitely justified in being concerned when it went off, but we got evacuation done without a hitch. it took a while to get everyone settled back down, but we let them nap an extra 30 minutes after the usual time to make up for it
I spent my lunch break changing my addresses for several accounts, then looking up schools in the area that are hiring paras and cross referencing that with how long the media specialists have been there (looking for soon to be retirees/future open positions) and have come up with a short list of schools to apply to come mid-January once we're at least a little settled
I'm glad I chose to come back to Harley's for tonight, it felt like college almost, probably because we all took a shot of straight vodka at one point. Mom called so I talked to her in the bedroom for like 45 minutes, and then while Karilyn cooked we talked about her work scavenger hunt and the old prank war I did with Peyton and Paige as well as the inspection report for the house and all of the things Karilyn can look at once we get in the place. Karilyn made steak for dinner, Harley and I went to get milkshakes, and we discovered on our outing that the store he used to work at with our former employer has been closed for good - seeing the store totally empty with all the lights shining on bare walls and carpet, it was like Christmas came early. I almost fell asleep on the couch watching the new EP of Gastronauts, but now I have properly prepared for bed so it is time for my last sleep here before I have to do moving part two, electric boogaloo starting on Monday
#Friday#December#i also tried to play some solo fortnite tonight to start the story mode stuff#and i got absolutely railed#99th in one match and then 98th in another (at least in that one i got a single elim right before i was killed)#i played a few others that were like 70s and 80s so i gave up#Karilyn is also watching like a Dexter spin off series#and while I've never actually seen the OG#this series is good so far from the couple eps ive caught part of#i keep being fascinated by their dedication to accurate props and sets and costumes they're really good at that#also the fact that Harley won his unemployment appeal bc they were being inconsistent lying assholes is even more perfect now#they literally closed the store that he managed and kept afloat for two years less than six months after firing him#we all knew they were going downhill#I'm glad i jumped ship early#but man i hope he wins his EEOC judgement and sues them and puts the other locations out of business#i need to go by and check the other out of the way location next week and see if they're still running#they consistently did worse than his store but every excuse was made for why they couldn't reach sales#when Harley couldn't reach entirely unrealistic sales goals it was placed entirely on him#so they can get fucked for all I care - in fact i would enjoy it#oh last side note before i go to sleep:#i kept reading that Kel/Neal fic today while the kids were on their extended nap and i think i might actually like it??#it's certainly a hot take but i think it can work with this writer#I'm looking forward to seeing where they take it
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MIDNIGHT IN MILAN — lhs
they say love makes you do stupid things...surely fucking your boyfriend in the bathroom at the prada after party when your relationship isn't even public and neither of you can afford a dating scandal isn't that stupid, right?
⟡ ┆ pairing. lee heeseung x fem!reader
⟡ ┆ genre and tropes. MDNI 18+ ONLY, smut, established relationship, idol AU (both heeseung and yn)
⟡ ┆ warnings. semi-public sex, unprotected sex, mirror sex, mild choking, creampie, fingering, tiniest hint of degradation (he calls her a slut like once), one singular spank, some hair pulling, not really any aftercare
⟡ ┆ word count. 6.4k
⟡ ┆ note. i know the hype around tipsy hee already died down but i simply couldn't let this go. started writing it literally the same day the pictures dropped, then got hit with a massive writers block and only recently managed to finish this. biggest thanks to @jayparked who listened to me complain about this fic and contemplate just deleting it all. this fic wouldn't be here without her :(
"Fuck, Hee—" your broken moans echo off the dark walls around you as you throw your head back at the feeling of his dick sliding in and out of you, hitting that perfect spot that has your hips chasing after his, "feels so good. Don't stop, please don't stop."
"Not planning to, baby," Heeseung grunts out his reply, his fingers digging into your flesh as he pulls you back to meet his sharp thrusts, sending shockwaves up your spine all the way to your head, making you feel woozy at the intense pleasure overwhelming your senses.
Your gazes meet in the mirror in front of you, your arms shaking as you try to hold yourself up. One of his hands moves up your body, his fingers wrapping around your throat and applying slight pressure to it to cut off the needy whines spilling from your mouth. Your eyes roll back at the sensation, head falling forward and your body crashing into the counter beneath you, your arms too weak to hold yourself up anymore.
"That's my good girl, so desperate for my cock, huh?" Heeseung smirks to himself, continuing to roll his hips into yours. He wants to tug on your hair, hold you in place so he can look at your fucked-out face, but he knows he needs to be careful not to wreck you too much, not to leave any marks — or at least none that leave no doubt as to what you're doing here.
Truly, the two of you should be ashamed about what you're doing, but neither of you can bring yourself to care — not in the slightest. Right now, the only thing you're concerned about is Heeseung's cock repeatedly drilling past your folds into your soaked heat, how snug your walls feel around him, hugging him, molding to his shape with each snap of his hips. Maybe come tomorrow when you wake up and you think back to this moment, you'll bury your head in your hands and wonder what drove you to make such stupid, such careless decisions.
After all, you are currently having sex with your boyfriend in a private powder room at an afterparty you had been invited to as brand ambassadors. You should be professional. Mingling with people, maybe having a drink, getting some of your pictures taken, but no, instead you're getting your guts rearranged by a man barely anyone knows is your boyfriend.
In your defense, the past few days had been beyond stressful, and you hadn’t been able to get any alone time with Heeseung in what feels like forever. Not during the busy days ahead of your flight to Italy, not during the 14-hour plane ride from Seoul to Milan for Fashion Week, and certainly not during all the schedules you had the past two days. Moments of privacy had been sparse, reduced to rare bathroom breaks since you shared a hotel room with one of the other members of your group.
----
Stepping out of the van to attend the afterparty, you force an effortless smile onto your face, repeatedly reminding yourself that this was your last schedule of the night and then you'd get a night of sleep just to hop onto another seemingly everlasting flight back home where you’ll be greeted with at least a few days without any public appearances. So you push yourself to ignore the ache in your feet from wearing heels all day, ignoring the throbbing in your head from the lack of sleep, food, and water, which only intensifies from the flurry of flashing cameras greeting you, or the pinch in your lower back from where you assume a safety pin must've come loose.
Hours pass by in the blink of an eye, pictures being taken with either your fellow group members or other celebrities and influencers also attending the party; a drink gets pushed into your hands, and the alcohol momentarily numbs your body and washes the pain away, allowing your shoulders to relax and your breaths to deepen as you take in your surroundings. Lo and behold, a few feet away from where you are, you find him standing: Heeseung. Hands in his pockets as he's talking to some unidentifiable celebrity in front of him.
Almost as if he feels your gaze on him, he glances away from the man before him, your eyes meeting for a brief moment. You take an involuntary step forward, like he's drawing you right in, before your manager steps in your line of sight, "They want a picture of you girls with Enhypen, something about wanting the two K-Pop groups attending in one picture together."
You nod your head at her words, trying to steal one last look at your boyfriend, only to see him walking right in your direction, together with Sunoo and Jungwon trailing after him, their manager leading them right to where you're walking to.
A staff member pushes and pulls you all into position, telling you where to stand and how to pose, and by some sort of miracle you end up right next to your boyfriend. Your manager shoots you a quick look, and you teasingly roll your eyes at her as she's silently warning you to not make your relationship too obvious, seeing as your company has been pretty outspoken about not wanting the public to know about what was going on between Heeseung and you.
While the photographers look over their pictures, trying to decide if they need more or if they're satisfied with what they got, you lean slightly to your right, close enough so the man next to you would be able to hear your hushed whispers, "You know...I heard some people talking about there being private restrooms at this venue. Just thought I'd mention it in case you'd like a moment alone to take a bit of a breather from all the socializing."
"Oh? Is that so?" you can hear the slight smile in the low rumble of his voice as he leans down, masking his closeness by adjusting the leg of his pants, "Guess I'll have to check them out in a bit then."
"Alright, everyone, we'll take a few more pictures and then you can go back to the party," one of the photographers interrupts your conversation, drawing all attention back to the front. You position yourself slightly to the left again, creating more space between your boyfriend and you to avoid angering your managers.
A few more pictures taken, and you're finally released. Almost instantly, you excuse yourself from your group, beelining towards the aforementioned restrooms, making sure not to draw any attention to yourself despite your heart beating rapidly in your chest at the thought of some alone time with your boyfriend, sending blood rushing through your ears, loud enough to drown out the quick click-clacks of your heels against the tiled floor underneath you.
The anticipation is killing you as you're waiting for Heeseung to show up, staring at your phone just to see the status of your message to him with the details of exactly where you are change from 'delivered' to 'seen' right in front of your eyes. Minutes feel like hours as you tap your foot nervously against the marble floor beneath your feet, trying your best to ignore your throbbing pussy, your folds covered in your slick and clinging onto your underwear already — all just because of the mere thought of what he would do to you within these four walls.
You glance at your phone again when three rapid knocks followed by two more taps against the wooden door next to you startle you. Opening the door with a smile on your lips, you lean out slightly, your head turning left and right to scan the hallway, "Are you sure no one followed you?"
Wordlessly he nudges you back inside and closes the door behind you. His lips are on yours in an instant, moving with familiar desperation as he pushes you against the closed door. His hands are all over you, grasping onto your hips, pulling them flush against him and allowing you to feel the growing bulge in his pants press against your lower abdomen. Your heart beats erratically in your chest — the sound almost drowning out the soft clicking of the lock turning behind your back — hands scrambling to find something to hold onto as lust takes over you, clouding your mind. His lips work against yours in a beautiful frenzy, rushed but still taking his time, nipping at your lower lip, entangling his tongue with yours in a passionate dance that wordlessly tells you everything you need to know.
Your body relaxes right against his, all tension melting away with each movement, the space between you charged with tension, thick and hot, as Heeseung pulls away.
"Don't worry, we're all alone, baby," he breathes against your lips as his mouth trails down to your neck, eagerly covering your skin in wet kisses as your hands reach up to tangle themselves in his hair.
The tiny voice in a deep, dark corner of your mind tells you not to mess it up, not to leave a single trace for people to suspect what the two of you left the party for, to avoid any scandal at all costs. But your need to be as close as possible to your boyfriend overrides any and all logic left inside you, so you ignore it, pulling him closer to you instead and letting him graze your skin wherever he desires. Contrary to you, he seems to still have some care for the consequences of your escapades, seeing as he moves down the collar of your dress to continue the path of his lips there, sucking and softly biting the supple flesh, leaving marks easily hidden.
With his hand pressing against the small of your back, he pulls you away from the door, and the two of you stumble over towards the massive mirror situated behind the vanity of the powder room. Your ass digs into the cold marble of the counter as he crowds you against it, fingers holding your hips in a bruising grip — enough to almost hurt, the sensation just the right mix of pain and pleasure to pull a whimpered plea from your lips — before moving lower. His hands massaging your round cheeks has you biting your lip, whining as he lifts you up, and you instinctively wrap your legs around his waist just to feel his hard cock straining against his pants and press right into where you need him the most.
"Hee...please—" you cut yourself off with a moan, louder than you had anticipated, and he quietly shushes you in response.
“Shh, baby, we don't wanna get caught now, do we?"
His lips form into a smirk against your skin as you shake your head with a slight pout on your lips. You really don’t want to get caught; you don't want to even think about what it would mean for both of you if people found out about what the two of you are up to in here, but your mind is begging, screaming at you to let it all out, let him know how good he's making you feel.
"You can be loud in the hotel; how about that, sweetheart?”
Oh, screw him. Getting you worked up over the possibilities the future holds for you before even having you now.
Your reply comes in the form of a quiet whimper, mind wandering off to all the possibilities your soundproof hotel room offers. His hands snap you out of it, interrupting your train of thought as they push underneath the bottom hem of your dress, reaching for your soiled underwear to press his fingers right against your cunt, feeling just how absolutely soaked he has gotten you.
"Fuck, baby, what's gotten you this wet, huh?"
"You, Hee—" you exhale, chest heaving up and down as he toys with your clit through the damp cotton of your panties, hips bucking up to chase his fingers, "please...please just fuck me already."
“Love when you beg for me like this. Shit," he groans, eyes closing for a brief moment in a hopeless attempt to compose himself, panting like a dog as he pulls away from you. His hands move over the buckle of his belt in a frenzied rush, fumbling slightly before he manages to undo it, opening his zipper with shaking and twitching fingers. His pants hit the floor with a thud, joined by the black briefs he had been wearing underneath, and he's back on you before you even have a chance to gawk at his cock, thick and heavy, with an angry tip, red and leaking precum already. Despite having seen it multiple times, it still never fails to take your breath away each time you get a chance to look at it.
His lips crash against yours in an almost bruising kiss, distracting you from his fingers hooking underneath your underwear, pushing it to the side as his other hand finds the base of his cock, pumping himself a few times until he lets his head kiss your entrance. In one fluid movement he pushes himself inside you, both of you letting out synchronized moans as you feel your walls stretching around his girth. His size still surprises you, despite this not being the first time together with him, and even though your cunt is dripping — your slick arousal running down your folds just to pool underneath you — you're still having trouble taking him wholly. His throbbing length fills you up so well you swear you feel him all the way in your belly, gasping as you spread your legs wider to grant him even more access to your wet pussy.
His fingers find their way back down to your clit, no longer obstructed by your underwear, massaging it slowly to help you relax around him. And it works; your body lets go, tension melting from you as you allow him to pull back slightly and thrust back in again, slowly managing to push further and further into you until he fills you to the hilt, his hips making contact with your ass. Pressing your face against his shoulder, you try your best to muffle your moans. Your cunt molds itself around him with each clench of your walls, desperate whines tumbling past your lips as his cock pulsates deep inside of you, as you feel every ridge, every vein, every inch of him.
"Taking me so well, baby, such a good girl for me. You ready for me to move, sweet girl?"
You nod breathlessly, almost unable to reply to his words at all, mind fuzzy with pleasure.
And he hasn't even started properly fucking you yet.
Heeseung presses a gentle kiss against your lips, already swollen and raw, his bruising kisses lingering on them, before he begins to move, hips thrusting into your greedy hole as you cling to him, holding on tightly as best as you can. His forehead falls against yours, labored breaths mixing together and becoming one as you pant into each other's mouths, a needy blend of curses occasionally interrupted by your names tumbling from both of your lips. Your eyes meet his, losing yourself in them as they pull you in further and further. His gaze makes you want to shy away, intense and all-consuming, while at the same time it just as well makes you want to throw your head back, moan his name for everyone in this building to hear just how good he's making you feel.
"So good—fuck, feels so good, Heeseung," you whimper, squeezing your eyes shut as you lean further into his embrace, his arms holding you upright as the control of your own body slips further from your grasp.
You feel so full of him, having him exactly how you wanted him all night, his cock brushing right against your cervix with every thrust, his hands all over your body in a desperate frenzy, his mouth latched against yours, tasting you like a starved man. The feeling of having him all over you is overpowering your every sense, hopelessly trying — and failing — to keep your moans at bay, choking back a desperate whine in the back of your throat.
Heeseung can't help but coo slightly at you, your urgency going straight to his ego, as well as his cock, twitching deep within your spongy walls as he moves your legs to wrap them around his waist tighter as he grunts and groans, "Such a dirty thing, letting me fuck you right where anyone could hear us. Shit, gonna let me use your pretty cunt, gonna walk out there with my cum dripping down your legs like the little slut you are?"
Your answer comes in a whined 'yes' as you throw your head back, eyes screwing shut, hot sparks shooting through your whole body. Your legs twitch around his hips, nerves tingling as you start clamping down around him. Lust clouds your judgment, wanting to draw this out as much as you could, not wanting to cum just yet. Staying in here any longer than absolutely necessary wouldn’t be the smartest thing to do; in fact, it would be the complete opposite of smart. With every second the two of you are together in this restroom, his cock pressed deep inside you, brushing against your cervix, you risk the chances of getting caught, of someone hearing you moan out his name.
Fortunately for you, Heeseung seems to have a similar thought process. Slowly, his thrusts come to a halt, and he pulls out of you. The emptiness he leaves behind rips a pitiful whine from you, and he shushes you by pressing his lips against yours in a quick, gentle kiss before moving you off the counter and turning you around. You don't mind him manhandling you — you enjoy it even — his touches soft but forceful as he makes your back collide with his chest, your eyes meeting in the big mirror in front of you.
"Be a good girl and bend over for me."
His breath is hot against your ear, voice low and drenched with desire oozing off it thick like honey as you feel his cock dig into the flesh of your ass, the combined sensations sending shivers down your spine. His fingers graze your thighs as he lifts the bottom of your dress above your ass, letting it pool around your hips. Slowly, he pulls your underwear down your legs, his blunt nails scraping your burning skin, leaving trails of goosebumps in their wake. The ruined cotton falls to the tiled floor beneath your feet, transparent and sticky with your arousal, as you lean your torso onto the counter, holding yourself up with your shaking arms. You step out of them, blindly kicking them to the side to allow yourself more freedom to move.
Impatiently, you look over your shoulder, wiggling your ass to silently urge him to hurry up and get back to fucking you again. He can't resist the temptation, even if he would’ve attempted to try, running his hand over your bare ass, caressing your soft, round globes before landing a slap against your smooth skin — not a particularly harsh or painful one, not nearly as forceful as you know he’s capable of, but hard enough to send a wave of electricity through your body, a muffled sob falling from your lips at the sensation — before placing them back on your hips, his fingers digging into your soft flesh with a bruising grip.
Not wasting any more time, he slides right back inside you. The different angle pulls a moan from you, mixing with the low groan falling from Heeseung's mouth as your warm pussy embraces his cock. One of his hands presses against your back, pinning your front against the cold marble counter underneath you, your arms shaking as you scramble to find something to hold onto. The sounds tumbling past his lips make you clench around his length, the low rumble of his groans bouncing off the walls surrounding you, his chest heaving up and down with each erratic roll of his hips turning you into a panting mess as he repeatedly hits that one sensitive spot within you. You try your best to hold eye contact with him through the mirror, wanting nothing more than to see the pleasure clearly written on his face right as you cum, but you simply cannot.
Your head falls forward, eyes screwing shut as you let pleasure take over you — your mind, your body, all of your senses.
His hand on your shoulder snaps you out of your stupor, looking up briefly just to see his eyes trained right on where you're connected, watching his dick disappear within your creamy hole again and again, laser-focused as if he was in a trance. He pulls you back to him with each of his thrusts, making you meet him with even more force. You let out a fervent moan at the sensation, your sobs joining the squelching sound of wet skin slapping against skin reverberating around the room. He drives inside you at a merciless pace, each thrust harder than the last one, making your entire body jolt at the force of them.
Heeseung steadies himself, taking his hand off your hip to place on the counter beside you, quickening his pace just slightly as his cock twitches inside of you in response to a particularly pornographic moan of yours.
"Hee-'m so close," you whine, fingers clawing at the marble counter, legs shaking as you feel yourself inching closer and closer to the edge with each drag of his heavy cock inside of you, each snap of his hips against yours.
Heeseung throws his head back at the sensation of your cunt fluttering around him, groaning out as his nails bite into your skin, "Just a bit longer, baby, almost there."
His hand on your shoulder pulls you up, your back colliding with his chest as he continues the merciless pace of his thrusts. The angle at which he keeps fucking into you feels overwhelming, consuming your whole mind and body, yet pleasurable in the best way, and you swear this is the closest you've ever been to heaven before. Your soft whines and pants turn into moans, growing louder with every passing second as you hold onto Heeseung's arm wrapped around your front, pressing you into his chest.
In a moment of clarity, Heeseung notices just how loud your moans have gotten, and as much as it pains him, he knows he quickly has to think of something to silence you unless you want someone to hear you on the outside of the door, resulting in a guaranteed scandal. His solution: his hand wrapped around your throat.
A gasped whimper escapes your mouth as you feel his fingers pressing into your skin, the slight pressure and the weight of his hand against your throat causes your head to spin, his grip not strong enough to hurt or leave marks but send dizzying pleasure right to the depths of your belly. Your breath hitches as your airways constrict, eyes rolling into the back of your head, hand reaching up to hold onto his wrist, making sure his hand stays right where it is, already addicted to the feeling.
The lack of air combined with his relentless thrusts sends you into a frenzy, you feel like you're floating, your limbs tingling, and the world around you blurs, your only focus on Heeseung's gaze that meets yours in the mirror in front of you. He's attentive, watching you closely and making sure you can still breathe — which you can, but the thrill of it all leaves you light-headed and gasping for air — while chasing his own high, pressing his lips into your shoulder to muffle the desperate groans threatening to escape him.
His grip on your throat tightens, just barely, but enough to cut off your air supply for just a short moment, the rush sending a brand new wave of arousal pooling in the depths of your belly. It feels like he's everywhere — his cock thrusting into you at a merciless pace, his hand wrapped securely around your throat while his arm winds around your waist, pulling you flush against his front, not allowing you to move in the slightest. The intensity of it all is overwhelming your senses, the lack of oxygen making everything sharper, more intense, and you're reveling in the sensation of him pounding into you and sending every nerve in your body buzzing with electric pleasure.
"God, so greedy, couldn't even wait until we were back at the hotel, could you? Just had to have my cock buried deep inside you, can't get enough of it, right, princess?” he grunts lowly as he loosens the grip on your throat, lips pressing into your ear, sending shivers down your spine as your walls clamp down on him while you suck in a desperate gasp of air.
You're too far gone to respond, your mind clouded with lust, hazy and floating like a cloud on a balmy spring day. All you can do is moan out his name, over and over again, a prayer falling from your lips as he continues thrusting into you, your body pushing against his tight hold of your waist, instinctively moving to meet every snap of his hips. His pace is relentless, Heeseung's thoughts replaced by his need to cum, desperately chasing his own high as he drives you closer and closer to the edge of blissful oblivion. The coil inside you winds impossibly tight, your legs shaking, and if it weren't for your boyfriend holding you upright, you know you'd be a mess of tangled limbs on the cold tiled floor beneath your feet already.
"Cum inside me—fuck, Heeseung, please," you plead breathily, your voice cracking as desperation takes over it, insatiable hunger and need setting your insides on fire.
"Shit, you want me to cum inside you, yeah?"
His hand rubs over the mound of your ass, soothing your raw skin, sensitive from the slap he delivered to it just mere moments ago. His fingers dig into the flesh of your hips with such force you're sure to find bruises the following day.
“God, yes, Heeseung!” you cry out, your voice breaking as you feel the knot inside you tighten rapidly, coiling tighter and tighter until it's a white-hot ball of pleasure, ready to explode and set your body alight.
He leans down slightly, his breath tickling your ear as he whispers into your ear, “Be a good girl and cum for me, then you’ll get what you’re asking for. Come on, let go, cum for me, pretty girl."
And just like that you find yourself tipping over the edge, his words breaking the dam inside you and allowing your high to crash over you like a tidal wave, destroying everything in its wake. Pleasure courses through every inch of your body. Every vein, every nerve is set alight and dragged along the powerful and overwhelming waves of your release. Your slick walls clamp down around him like a vice, spasming with every drag of his cock, every brush of his mushroom tip against that one spot that makes stars explode in front of your eyes.
His grip on you loosens enough to allow your upper half to fall forward, catching yourself as you lean on your forearms, left panting and completely undone as you gasp for air, lungs burning and desperate for the sweet taste of oxygen.
Heeseung lets out a strangled moan at the feeling of your dripping cunt tightening around him with even more force, his control slipping as his thrusts become urgent and uncontrollable. He murmurs something underneath his breath, but the rush of your heartbeat echoing in your ears is too loud, drowning out his words, which you assume are mumbled curses of your name.
You lose yourself in the sensation, barely able to form any coherent thoughts as your climax drags on. Each wave drags you deeper and deeper into the current of pleasure, leaving you gasping for air, body twitching and trembling as Heeseung prioritizes his own pleasure, chasing his high with renewed fervor.
Heeseung has never been a selfish lover, always putting your pleasure first, making sure you got to cum at least once before even letting himself think about the possibility of his own release. And maybe that’s part of the thrill for him, repeatedly — intentionally — edging himself until he finally gets what he wants from you, driving himself to the edge of his release over and over again until he is so sensitive he feels like he’s about to explode from just the slightest stimulation.
“Oh fuck, baby—“ he pants with a strained voice, his chest rising and falling rapidly, breaths ragged as he finally allows himself to let go.
With a low guttural groan, Heeseung spills himself inside of you, thick spurts of his warm cum shooting deep into your pulsing cunt, painting your insides white and oozing out of your pussy past his cock. The heat of it sends tiny aftershocks through you; your body shakes as you try to catch your breath, looking into the mirror to see him working himself through the last dredges of his orgasm, jaw slack and body trembling. His face is glistening with sweat, beads of it rolling down his throat and disappearing beneath the neckline of his black shirt.
The sight of him is enough to make you ache with need all over again — his face twisted in pleasure, his eyes dark and unfocused as he watches his cum leak out of your wrecked pussy around his length. You cannot help but think of the folder on his phone, password protected to keep it from the wrong eyes and filled to the brim with pictures you hope never see the light of day: his cum dripping out of your ruined cunt; his cock shoved into your mouth, the lower half of your face messy with a mix of spit, cum, tears, and lipstick; love bites scattered across the skin of your neck and the insides of your thighs like the constellations of the night sky. If you had more time, you’re sure he would add to that growing collection of his, pulling out his phone and snapping multiple pictures until he was satisfied, moving your body into various positions to get the best shot.
Instead of allowing your small daydream to become reality, Heeseung pulls out of you, the sudden emptiness leaving you whimpering and clenching around nothing, the squelching wet sound of him slipping his cock out of you echoing around the room.
He takes another moment to admire the mess he's made of you, leaning back slightly as he watches his cum drip from your drenched hole. He reaches out, letting his fingers run between your folds to collect his cum just to shove it back into you. The sight of your pussy swallowing his digits, your puffy lips embracing them with ease makes his cock twitch again, overstimulated and sensitive but still aching for more.
“Hee—fuck, please,” you’re not even sure what you’re begging for, mind fuzzy and eyes heavy as you watch him through the mirror in front of you.
You try to drink it all in, wanting this moment embedded in your memory until the end of your days. His dark hair falling into his eyes, focused on the white globs of his cum slipping out of your cunt from around his fingers and running down your thigh. His skin is flushed, sweat beaded on it like little gems glued to reddened satin. It trails down his neck to his chest, revealed by the undone top button of his shirt.
Heeseung interrupts your little ogling session when he pulls his fingers out slowly, savoring the way you shudder at the loss.
You catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror before he gently turns you around to face him: lips puffy and swollen, eyes watery and completely wrecked despite your combined effort to prevent just this from happening when you were still able to think clearly before your minds were clouded with lust.
“You did so well, baby,” Heeseung murmurs, his voice thick with a twisted mix of pride and possessiveness as he angles your head so his lips capture yours in a kiss that sends another wave of burning heat through you, igniting the glowing embers lingering deep within you.
His hands slide to your hips, fingers digging into your flesh as he effortlessly lifts you up, your bare thighs resting on the vanity underneath you, the cold marble biting into the raw and tender skin of your ass.
“Made such a mess, can you feel it dripping out of you?” — you nod at his question despite knowing he didn’t ask for you to answer — “Want me to clean you up?”
“Fuck, yes,” you breathe out your reply, eyes glossing over at the intention.
A smirk tugs at the corners of his lips, the unspoken meaning of his words written as clear as day on his face as he slowly lowers himself to the tiled floor beneath his feet, spreading your legs in the process to make room for him to fit between them. He looks up at you from between your spread thighs, leaning forward slightly to press his lips against the insides of them, alternating between nibbling and sucking, sure to leave marks for you to find the next day. A whispered sigh of his name slips past your lips as you throw your head back slightly, his lips ghosting closer and closer to where you need him, to where his cum was still dripping out of you.
His warm breath fans over your wet center, lips just a hair's width away from your pulsing cunt when a gentle knock interrupts you. Heeseung jumps up at the sound, back on his feet in an instant. Your eyes are wide in panic as you meet his gaze before you both turn to the door.
“Shit,” Heeseung mouths as he rushes to grab some paper towels to wipe your mixed juices from between your thighs, hoping that whoever just knocked on the door isn’t aware of the fact that there are currently two people in this bathroom. Two people who certainly could not afford to be caught in a position like you are currently finding yourselves in.
“Heeseung? It’s me, Jay.”
The sigh of relief leaving both of you could almost be described as comical if not for the tension still lingering between you, all the worries and anxieties of a secret relationship almost coming true. Haphazardly, Heeseung pulls his pants up, the undone belt still hanging from his hips as he helps you down from the vanity, hands tugging at the hem of your dress to give you at least a slight bit of decency. He takes one look in the mirror, letting out a small groan before shuffling over to open the door.
The moment the door opens, Jay turns towards both of you, hands buried in the pockets of his pants as he awkwardly shifts from one foot to the other. The redness of his ears confirms your suspicions that he most likely heard more than you would’ve liked, immediately sending your blood rushing to your head, face burning with embarrassment at your friend catching you in such a precarious position. He clears his throat once, trying — and failing — to subtly take in Heeseung’s appearance before shooting a small, albeit flustered, smile at the two of you.
“We gotta leave, like,” he takes a look at his phone to check the time, “right now, actually. I already bought you both some time, told them you weren’t feeling well, and Heeseung wanted to make sure you’re alright. You should…clean yourselves up a bit. Meet us at the entrance in 5?”
You both nod as you watch Jay turn to leave after looking your boyfriend and you up and down once again, shaking his head as he deeply sighs in disappointment — a sound almost eerily similar to one you had heard your parents make several times when you were younger — and you swear as he walks away you can hear him mumble to himself about how you were like two hormonal teenagers, not able to keep it in your pants for even one night.
“Well, guess we gotta get you cleaned up, huh, sweetheart?”
“Oh no, we don’t!” you jab your finger into his chest as he chuckles at you, “I get cleaned up, and you can go meet up with everyone. It’ll be less suspicious if we don’t show up at the same time.”
Heeseung holds up his hand in fake surrender, a smile still playing with his glossy lips as his eyes roam over your body with one last hungry gaze. Despite the burning ache inside him, the quick kiss he presses against your lips is nothing but sweet and gentle, tenderness quickly replaces the darkness formerly taking over his eyes, “I’ll text you later. Maybe we can manage to sneak you into my hotel room later.”
“Sounds like a plan,” your hands wrap around his arms, giving his biceps one last affectionate squeeze before ushering him out of the bathroom and away to join his group members, giving you a few more precious minutes to clean up, make yourself look somewhat presentable — or at least presentable enough to not have any fans or press question just what exactly happened over the past hour — and find out where you had kicked your underwear in the heat of the moment.
You take a moment to watch your boyfriend walk away, the slight bounce in his step is a dead giveaway for the people who knew him that he just got laid, but lucky for both of you, no one of importance should be able to figure him out and turn this whole thing into an issue for the two of you. Just as you’re about to turn around and assess his damage in the big vanity mirror, Heeseung turns around one more time, eyes twinkling with mischief as he takes you in, watching the way your eyebrows rise on your forehead in a silent question at his sudden halt.
“Oh, and baby?” you nod your head in response, “Make sure to wipe the lipstick from your chin. We wouldn’t want anyone to find out what a greedy slut you are for me, would we now?”
© sungbeams — all rights reserved. i do not give permission to copy, repost, modify or translate my works.
#enhypen smut#heeseung smut#lee heeseung smut#enhypen x reader#enhypen imagine#enhypen fic#heeseung x reader#heeseung imagine#heeseung fic#lee heeseung x reader#lee heeseung imagine#lee heeseung fic
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imagine: dating alhaitham and waiting for the right time to have sex for the first time :))) (ps. ur my favorite writer <3 xx)
cw. his cock is big in this fic (and in general), passionate and hot and sexy and yum yum bark, fem! reader
alhaitham and you wanted to wait for the right time before you took the next step in your relationship, when the both of you would truly be ready to have sex for the first time— and when he touches you within the fullness of the night, his personality shows two different types.
one being reflective and patient, inspecting the way your body reacts to him while on the other hand, he was shapeless, needy and almost, feral.
he wets his lips in concentration, his weight lingering against your stomach as you couldn't stop your body from shivering out of anticipation that shot through your muscles and pores before looking at the lust in his eyes, the hunger in his expression.
the softness of your skin blossoms beneath his hand as his ears were weakened by the sound of your angelic tunes and whimpers, his finger tips set out with a plan to caress and stroke every nook and cranny of your skin.
"are you alright? d-does that feel good?" he asks and kisses along your cheek, his solid erection sliding through your wetness as you nod eagerly.
answering him with a tranquil whisper, his cock pounds in and out of your warmth as his strong hands instantly grip at your wrists to draw them above your head, pinning them there.
"it— it's so good—" and after your moans, your body warns you with goosebumps rising on your skin in combination with your back arching, your head floating as you gasp out his name again, each time getting louder, needing him close, your teeth digging into his shoulder as gently as you could.
inside this inferno, you struggled, desperate to touch alhaitham too, you almost feel bad that he was the one doing all the work when in reality, the scribe wanted nothing more but to make you feel good tonight, stroke and lick and touch you like you deserve.
your breathing was ragged at how he continuously changed between being overly sweet and caressing to rough and ruthless. the first new taste of his hips smacking forward and beginning to roughly pound you made your blood sing, your heart thumping in your chest.
alhaitham swallows a sound that certainly could not be a whimper, it was more— you simply were too much for him, feeling too tight when he bulges you apart on every single thrust of his cock, your pussy squeezing him like you're going to end up suffocate him dearly.
you stifle a shudder that no doubt promised an imminent climax as you prepared to take it for him, cum with him at the same time, aching by the solid bulk burning in and out your hole, inch by inch until you're moaning into each others lips.
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©2024 anantaru do not repost, copy, translate, modify
#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin smut#genshin impact smut#alhaitham x reader#alhaitham smut#genshin x you#genshin impact x you#al haitham x reader#al haitham smut#genshin impact drabbles#alhaitham x you#genshin drabbles
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The Heart of Rome (Marcus Acacius x OC)
All Chapters List
VI. The Battle
this is the longest chapter i ever wrote , it was pain in the ass, so please be nice, reblog and hit a like, if you enjoy thank you :)
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lupus est homo homini
A man to a man is a wolf.
T. Hobbes
Temple of Saturn…
Saturnalia was by far the most joyous Roman festival; the Roman poet Catullus famously described it as ‘the best of times’. The festivities were so exuberant that the Roman writer Pliny is said to have had a soundproof room built so that he could work during the raucous celebrations. During Saturnalia, business and commerce would come to a standstill. Schools and courts were closed and normal social practices were suspended. The feast was celebrated with sacrifices and a public banquet in the Temple of Saturn in the Roman Forum.
People decorated their houses with garlands, even the exteriors of official buildings were decorated with greenery. People were dressed in different colours for this day, unlike their daily and official clothes. The streets of Rome were lively and colourful today.
You travelled to the temple with your half-brothers, Caracalla and his mother Julia Domna in the flamboyant carriage in front, and you and Geta - at his insistence - in the carriage behind them. Even though you felt that Geta was treating you more cordially now, you still couldn't be completely sure. But he was certainly different from Caracalla and his mother, they had a ruthless side that never changed, and you were sure that you could not trust them under any circumstances.
Already the ostentatious temple was crowded with people, the Romans seemed to be enjoying the day of festivities. They were shouting your names with great enthusiasm as you got out of the carriages and greeted them. One of them was handing you a bouquet of flowers when one of the guards blocked him. You told him to move away and thanked him as you took the flowers, he was so surprised and happy that he started dancing with joy. His mates joined him and chanted your name. Geta gave your arm a gentle but firm grip. 'You have to be a bit more careful. You never know what they'll do.'
'It's just a few flowers,' you replied. 'And why would they hurt me?'
He smiled, but his eyes showed his concern. 'You're so naive, sister. There's so much you have to learn. Let's get these ceremonies over with, I'm dying to get to the banquet.’
As you walked up the stairs of the temple, you noticed that he was still holding your arm.
'Are you feeling better now?' you asked, trying to pull your arm back, but for some reason he wouldn't let go. It bothered you. 'Could I just ask you to let go of my arm, please?'
He paused and looked at you with his light brown eyes. He looked like he wanted to tell you something, but it was hard to know what emotion he was feeling. All of a sudden, he smiled. "I think the disgusting herbal concoction worked.'" He took his hand away and started up the stairs faster. You tried to keep up with him, but he was too fast, and Caracalla was waiting for him at the top of the steps. '"You're slow," he grumbled. Julia squinted at you and went inside. It seemed like you were going to have to get used to that look.
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After the ceremony of sacrificing a young pig in front of the statue of the god Saturn, just between the tall white pillars inside the temple, Geta approached you as you prayed to the great statue then gestured you to outside and walked towards the stairs to leave, followed by Caracalla, who took his mother by the arm. You'd have to get used to walking side by side with them, but it still felt a bit strange. People were coming to the temple to sacrifice, just like you, and they were all turning to look at you and greet you.
"I want to get to the palace for the banquet as soon as possible," Geta said, sounding a bit impatient.
"You must be hungry. You were busy this morning," he said quietly.
You looked at him and said, "Yes, you're right, thanks again, by the way, much appreciated, highness."
"Oh, these stairs... Hold out your arm," he said in a commanding tone.
Geta was wearing a white and black toga with gold embroidery and it was very elaborate. He looked like he was struggling and didn't like you looking at him hesitantly. "Aren't you going to help me?"
You forced a smile and held out your arm for him to take. It was starting to feel a little strange that he wanted to touch you all the time, but you didn't object because you wanted to be on good terms as brother and sister.
You noticed an old woman approaching you just after descending the steps. One of the guards pushed her away and she fell to the ground. Geta ignored her, as did Caracalla and his mother. It bothered you so much that you let go of Geta's arm and walked over there.
You ignored the guard's warning and helped the woman off the floor. Her clothes were torn, dirty and old; she must have been a beggar. You felt sorry for her.
'What are you doing?' Geta was upset.
The woman bowed her head. 'My lady, thank you.'
You turned to Geta. 'Could I possibly borrow some coins?’
‘Get away from her, look at the way she's dressed, she's filthy.’ He was looking at her with a disgusted expression.
‘It's festival day and as emperor, shouldn't you embrace all your people?’
He opened his eyes wide. ‘Embrace? I can't even lay a hand on her!’ He balled his hands into fists and pulled them back as if trying to hide them.
‘I meant metaphorically,’ you rolled your eyes at him.
Geta took a moment to compose himself and gestured to one of his slaves, who came running over with a pouch full of coins. You took it from him and presented it to her.
'May the gods bless you, Lady Aurelia!' she said, falling at your feet. You graciously took her by the hand and lifted her up.
‘That is enough,' Geta said, grasping your arm and drawing you closer. As the woman prayed joyfully, the crowd began to murmur.
“Long live Emperor Geta!” The crowd began to chant, "Long live Lady Aurelia!"
Geta was taken aback not by the fact that they were shouting his name, but rather by the proximity of the crowd. It was the first time he had ever felt so close to the people on the street.
'Please be sure to wash your hands thoroughly when you arrive at the palace,' he muttered.
You giggled and looked around as he greeted the people, but you did not see the general. He had said he was coming to the banquet anyway, so you got into the carriage with Geta, hoping to see him there, and you thought about him the whole way.
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Domus Severiana…
As the sun began to set, casting the courtyard and kitchen of Domus Severiana in a golden glow, preparations were underway with great enthusiasm. The slaves were meticulously preparing a selection of exquisite dishes and beverages for the guests who were expected to take their place in the main courtyard. Julia was there to oversee the proceedings, offering guidance and encouragement to ensure everything was just right. Caracalla was already relaxing in one of the armchairs in the courtyard, enjoying an apple. When one of the slaves unfortunately stumbled and dropped the tray, he reacted with amusement, but then proceeded to issue a firm reprimand. While this was taking place in the main courtyard, you were in your room, discussing attire with Decima, when the door to your room suddenly opened. You were startled when Geta rushed in, as you wearing your long, thin tunic.
"Even if you're the emperor, it's always worth being polite, don't you think?"
He smiled. "Watch your tone. Who says I'm interested in your body anyway?" He looked away as a slave girl walked in. The girl was carrying a light turquoise silk cloth in her arms.
"You always wear the same style of dress, your hair the same way, you don't look like a princess. You should take some care of yourself. So this girl, what's her name, what's your name?”
“Nerissa, your highness-”
"Oh, whatever!" he interjected. "Make sure you dress her and do the princess's hair with care." He turned to you. "She's got amazing hands-on skills. You wouldn't believe what she can do. She's really talented," he said with a grin.
She giggled. “Anything for my emperor.”
‘I'm assuming your whore friend isn't that talented,’ he said, narrowing his eyes, looking at Decima.
‘Please don't call her that,’ you snapped.
‘'Weren't you supposed to take her on my behalf? She's my slave, I can call her whatever I want,’ he said smugly.
It was true anyway as it was his name on the documents.
‘Still, courtesy is a virtue, brother.’‘
"Not for me,’ he said, grinning. ‘Get dressed now,’ he said, clapping his hands. “Join me in the main courtyard when you're done,” he said to his slave, then turned to you. “You too, sister."
You inhaled deeply when he left, you didn't like him barging into your room like that and talked badly about Decima.
He was acting like a naughty little child, as usual.
'Please excuse him,' you said Decima.
She shook her head. 'Never mind, I'd rather put up with a lot of insults here than there as a whore. I'll always remember what you did for me.’
You gave her a hug. She felt like your real family; you valued her a great deal.
'He was right though, you need to get dressed,' Decima said, and with the help of the other girl they began to dress you.
Meanwhile, you were thinking about Marcus. You were wondering if he'd arrived already. You hadn't seen him since morning and now you were getting impatient. Your answer to his marriage proposal is already set in your mind. But you were also worried about how Geta and Caracalla would react – it was hard to predict what they'd do.
'You were certainly born to be a princess, my lady,' she said, looking at you.
Decima smiled. 'Indeed.'
You looked in the mirror and thought you looked pretty good in the turquoise gold embroidered dress and shawl, which matched the gold bracelets on your arms and the necklace around your neck. Geta was right – the girl had done your hair perfectly. One of the braids had gone over the top of your head like a crown and was pinned into the hair at the nape of your neck.
'You're really talented. My brother was right.’
She gave a shy smile. 'I'm really pleased to be able to help prepare such a beautiful lady as you.'
You smiled back. 'Now, you can go to my brother. He seems to like you.'
Her cheeks flushed a little. It would be a good idea for you to get to know her better, since Geta seems to like her.
'Let me know if he's not feeling well, okay?' 'But you've got to keep it between us, can I trust you?'
'Of course, my lady.' She nodded.
Once she'd left the room, Decima came over to help you with your earrings. She still had bruises on her face.
'Have you been using the ointment I prepared for you?’
‘Yes, thank you, Ay-, my lady.’
‘Call me Aurelia when no one's around.’
‘I suppose, I'll have to get used to it.’
She combed the hair that was falling on your shoulder.
'You stay in the room and rest for today.’ You said to her.
Although she was a bit reluctant at first, she agreed. It was already a very busy day, so no one would notice.
As you left your room and headed for the stairs, you found that the weight of the fabric made it a bit difficult to move your legs freely. You made your way down the stairs, grabbed hold of the gold-embroidered railing for support. As you strolled towards the main courtyard, your heart started to beat faster when you heard the sounds of masculine laughter coming from inside. Geta and Caracalla were sitting at the banqueting hall, enjoying the food and drink that was laid out in front of them. The members of the Senate, the patricians and their wives were already settled in their seats. Julia was sitting next to Caracalla, chatting with an older member of the Senate.
As soon as you entered the hall, you were the focus of everyone's attention, and the murmuring ceased. Even the slaves paused in their activities to observe you, but then they resumed their tasks. Geta stood up and approached you. "Look how gorgeous my sister is. Would you come and take your seat?" He gestured to the seat next to him. You smiled at him and did as he said, the murmuring had returned, now everyone was looking at you and chatting. But the only person you wanted to see, Marcus, was nowhere to be seen, and you looked around with a hint of disappointment.
"My lady." Your cousin Gaius came over to you. "May I speak to you privately for a moment?" he held out his hand.
"Leave my sister alone and let her eat something, Gaius," Geta said, a little annoyed. He was still chewing the morsel in his mouth, and you pursed your lips to try to keep from laughing. Caracalla already laughed for you.
"That's alright, brother. I'll be right back," you said and stood up. Gaius seemed a little annoyed that you ignored his hand, but he regained his composure quickly. You were not particularly curious about what he was going to say, but it might be a good way to pass the time until the general arrived. As you walked slowly with Gaius from the main courtyard to the one close to the entrance, you realized he was becoming increasingly excited.
"You look beautiful, Aurelia."
"Thank you," you replied, your gaze fixed on the entrance door. You wonder why he isn't here yet.
"I hope you don't mind me mentioning that I've kept your father's letter for years. I have been eagerly awaiting the opportunity to open it for quite some time. Hoping desperately.”
"Is that so?"
"Yes, it seems that after your mother's passing, your relatives in Leptis Magna were interested in offering you their protection. However, your father, my uncle, felt it was best to take a different approach, sending you away I mean.”
You were unexpectedly touched by the mention of your mother and found yourself standing in front of the statue of your father. "He was hopeful that you would return and reclaim your birthright, and that your brothers would accept you. Given my familiarity with them and the Empress, I believe he gave me this assignment," he said, looking at the statue. "I am truly honored to have been assigned the task of protecting you. I hope you will allow me to be of service to you in the future."
“In the future?”
Gaius smiled. "I would be able to protect you more easily if you would allow me to marry you."
You were momentarily at a loss for words. As you considered how to decline his proposal without offending him, you observed a figure moving across the main courtyard towards the banquet. It appeared to be a man wearing a red shawl over his shoulders. It seemed likely to be him. However, when he soon disappeared between the columns, you couldn't help but frown. You felt a desire to pursue him.
"My lady, will you not answer?" Gaius was waiting hopefully.
"Sir Gaius, I am truly flattered, but I am afraid I am unlikely to accept your offer."
“May I ask why?" His voice betrayed no hint of curiosity. Again, it seemed as though he already had an idea of the answer. You were not interested in engaging in a similar manner.
"I'm obliged to tell you that my heart belongs to someone else. I'm sorry, sir.”
He seemed rather unsurprised, which might give rise to some suspicion.
"I'm just asking you to think a little more, take your time."
"No matter how much I think about it, I'm fairly certain my answer won't change."
Gaius seemed angry.
"I would like to return to my brothers now," you said, your voice calm and measured.
"As you wish, but I am a very patient man," he said with a smile and accompanied you towards the banquet hall.
You returned to the courtyard, your eyes seeking out his presence. You were relieved to see him right in front of Geta and Caracalla, and your spirits were lifted. Acacius looked quite splendid, wearing a long red shawl over his white tunic embroidered with gold and a large circular brooch pinned to his collar.
He appeared to be engaged in conversation with the emperors. He was holding a wine glass of a blue hue. When Geta and Caracalla turned their heads towards you, he looked back. When you met his eyes, you smiled. He observed you with great interest.
"My lady," he greeted you.
"General Acacius, welcome," you nodded.
The General's attention was drawn to Gaius as he approached from behind, narrowed his eyes. "Sister, you might be interested to hear what General Acacius said to us." Geta said to you in a slightly louder voice.
”What is it?" You looked at the general and realized he was smiling.
"He wants our permission to marry you, how kind of him!”
“He always is." Caracalla said, leaning back in his chair and grinning. His slaves sitting around him, watching curiously.
Your cheeks were flushed, and you looked at him to explain, but Gaius interjected.
'General Acacius had the opportunity to speak with you first, and it was with the same intention that I wished to speak to your Majesties.'
Geta raised his eyebrows and looked at Caracalla, who seemed to display a certain degree of animosity whenever he saw Gaius. Julia muttered something. Caracalla responded to his mother's words with a lighthearted laugh.
"I have already given you my answer, Sir Gaius," you said, looking at Geta. You were hoping he would reject him.
Acacius placed a hand to his chin and smiled in a way that seemed to indicate he was trying to suppress his laughter.
"As I told you I'm a patient man, my lady."
"Cut it off! I've had enough of your love intrigues!" Caracalla cried out in frustration. Macrinus was supposed to bring a gladiator. Where is he?"
"This is like a fight, brother. Don't you think? Two gentlemen against each other over a princess. Impressive.” Geta grinned.
The atmosphere was palpably tense as Acacius and Gaius exchanged unpleasant glances.
"I am here, your highness," Macrinus declared, appearing behind you. He was flanked by the gladiator slave you had seen earlier at his villa.
He gave Gaius a quick glance, then came to stand beside Geta.
‘My lady, please have a seat,’ the General said, gesturing towards the chair.
You smiled at him and did as he suggested, and he stood beside you. One of the slaves handed you some wine. You would have liked to talk to Marcus, but there were too many people around. Besides, he seemed to be watching Macrinus' gladiator with some unease. Geta and Caracalla, on the contrary, looked excited.
"So this is your gladiator?" Geta asked.
‘It is.’
‘Very well, let's see what he can do.’ Caracalla grinned.
At Macrinus' signal, the gladiator made his way to the center, and the people around him shifted slightly to give him space.
Both men saluted the emperors and promptly drew their swords and advanced towards the gladiator, but he was swift and agile, evading their attacks and seizing one of the men by the elbow. He then disarmed him and struck him forcefully in the face with the back of his elbow. As the man was momentarily disoriented, the gladiator swiftly retrieved the sword and advanced towards the other man. The sound of swords clashing echoed through the hall, and a sword fight commenced between the two. The other man approached from behind, but the gladiator was able to avoid both the sword blow and the man's attack. He then grabbed the man by the waist, threw him to the ground, and hit him repeatedly in the face.
Your entire body was visibly tense, your hands firmly grasping the fabric of your dress. Caracalla sat up in his chair and watched intently, so something like this could only excite him.
When the man collapsed, bloodied and unconscious, the gladiator managed to overpower the other man with his sword and quick footwork. Unfortunately, this left them both without swords. The man was more physically fit and appeared to be more determined than the gladiator. He advanced towards him and grabbed him by the belt and then by the waist and threw him backwards with some force to the ground, which resulted in one of the tables full of food being knocked over. You felt yourself becoming increasingly tense as the food and drinks were scattered around, and you saw the general moving in front of you. Guests were murmuring and applauding, but they continued to watch with interest.
The gladiator was covered in blood, but he was smiling. He quickly wiped the blood off his face with the back of his hand and waited for the man to make a move. When the man made a sudden advance, shouting, the gladiator responded by moving swiftly to strike at his leg. When the man faltered, the gladiator took the opportunity to strike him several times in the face with his chin, attempting to knock him to the ground. However, the man remained standing. At that moment, the gladiator took the sword from the ground and, in a swift and decisive move, drove it through the man's stomach. You were taken aback as blood spattered everywhere from the man's abdomen. Some of the people in the hall expressed their shock and dismay, while others were visibly excited. Geta and Caracalla expressed their admiration for his performance, and their slaves joined in the applause. The gladiator respectfully placed his sword on the ground and bowed his head in deference to them. The air was filled with a distinctive, pungent odor of blood. You felt a queasy sensation in your stomach, not due to the smell of blood, but because the blood was still flowing from the cut in the abdomen of the man lying lifeless on the ground. While the majority of the people present were expressing their approval with cheers and whistles, you and the general were the only ones who did not join in.
Geta stood up and gave a little clap. "That's fantastic!" "I love it!"
"I'm really looking forward to the new games," Caracalla said.
"Whenever you wish, Your Majesty," said Macrinus with a smile.
"Tomorrow!" Geta piped in excitedly.
"Your Majesty, shouldn't we wait until the festival is over?" Julia came over to him.
"No, it'd be too long. How about the last day of the Saturnalia?" "It would be a great way to end the festival," Caracalla said with a grin.
"My brother always has great ideas," he said, grinning at him.
You turned your head to look away as the guards pulled the bodies of the men out of the ground. Macrinus and Gaius went over to the gladiator and started talking to him about something. The general had noticed your nervousness.
"My lady, would you like to go for a walk?"
“Your face has gone white, sister.” Geta was looking at you with a grin. Caracalla laughed, “As a Medicus, shouldn't you be used to see blood?”
You stood up. “I need to get some air,” you said and looked at the general. “General Acacius, accompany me, please.”
He nodded and bowed to the emperors before following you.
There was still blood on the ground outside, so you decided to walk the other way. Soon the General came up to you.
“Are you alright?” there was concern in his voice.
“Yes,” you lied. “I'm not used to this and I don't think I want to get used to it.”
"Perhaps you would like to hold my hand?" he enquired, holding out his big hand towards you.
His eyes were warm, looking at them, you felt a sense of relief from the tension you had been feeling.
The only other people in the courtyard were the slaves, who were enjoying the day. The sounds of musical instruments soon filled the main courtyard, creating a festive atmosphere. When you held Acacius' hand, you felt your skin warm, touching his skin always gives you a reassuring warmth. "So you mentioned to my brothers that you wished to marry me," you said as you walked through the garden in the east courtyard.
"That is correct," he said with a smile. “But, I would like to hear your answer before they say anything."
As you strolled past the garden fountain, the soothing sound of the flowing water was a welcome respite from the slightly more vibrant melody playing in the courtyard.
You moved to stand in front of Acacius, holding both hands and looking into his eyes.
"I would be honored to be your wife, General."
The brown of his eyes shone brightly, and as he took a step towards you, you involuntarily stepped back, for some reason his devastating gaze had that effect on you. He couldn't help but seem to like it, he raised his hands and cupped your face in his palms. Your cheeks blessed by his touch.
"I should be the happiest man on this auspicious day," he said softly, brushing his lips against yours. Then he kissed you gently.
Your lips were pleased to meet his lips again, and a heat spread through your body under his lips. Marcus lowered his arms and took hold of you around the waist, pulling you closer to him. You brought your arms up and wrapped them around his neck, and the kiss became more passionate. You both yearned for each other's bodies, whispering your desire through your lips. Marcus forced to stop himself when his hand reached your shoulder, his lips stilling under yours and turning into a smile, his moustache tickling your upper lip. Breathless, opened your eyes to met his eyes, his hands still on your waist, yours still on his thick neck.
"Perhaps we should save the rest for our wedding night, my lady." He said with a hint of mischief in his voice. He was gently running his fingers through your hair with one hand. "Patience is my best friend yet my worst enemy." He kissed a strand of your hair in the palm of his hand. You slid your hands to his broad shoulders.
"My enemy for sure," you said, frowning. He laughed merrily, caressed your nose with his nose, and kissed your forehead. "You always manage to cheer me up, my lady." The music from the main courtyard was getting louder. Marcus took a step back and held out his arm.
"Maybe we should head back to the banquet?"
You gave a slight nod and took his arm. The music evoked memories of your time in Egypt.
Vicius, your uncle, was mindful of the fact that festival days were not the ideal time for you to be out and about, but he was ultimately swayed by your persistent requests. Even if you were unable to fully observe the other girls dancing through your large black cloak, you still enjoyed being there. As you observed the girls dancing in the main courtyard, a young slave approached you at a brisk pace.
"General Acacius, the Emperors want to see you."
Marcus nodded and turned to you. "I'll see what they want. Would you like to come?”
Shaking your head. ”I'm not quite ready to go in there yet.”
"As you please, my lady.” He agreed.
You watched him as he took his leave of you, releasing your hand and entering the banquet hall. You were curious as to whether this was a decision about marriage, but you felt it would be best to wait until Macrinus and his gladiator had left.
As you made your way towards the slave girls, who were dancing with evident joy, you came to realise how happy they were. Today was a day of freedom for them, as they were able to enjoy the same food and drinks. They were not expected to do much work today. Geta's slave, the one who dressed you, approached and respectfully inquired, "Lady Aurelia, would you like to join us?"
"Dancing? I've never danced before."
"It's really quite simple. Just allow yourself to become absorbed in the rhythm of the music.”
You noticed she was taking her time deciding whether to take your hand, so you smiled and grasped it. "Then go ahead and teach me."
She giggled, pulling you towards the others.
When you approached them the slaves stopped dancing and looked at you, a little unsure and curious.
"Why did you stop?" "Go on, I want to dance," you said with a encouraging smile.
They looked at each other, smiled back, and started dancing again. Another girl took your other hand, and you all formed a circle. Then they stood facing each other and guided you as you passed through each other. The girl who was Geta's slave was right—it was easy to dance when you let yourself go to the rhythm of the music. It felt great to experience something you'd wanted for so long but hadn't had the chance.
"You're doing great, my lady." The girl replied with a smile.
"It's so much fun," you said with a smile.
When you switched places with the girl, dancing again, you suddenly noticed that people were gathering around you.
"It looks like our sister is enjoying herself," Geta said, coming up behind you. You stopped and looked at him with embarrassment. Gaius and the others were standing next to him, smiling and observing you. But you found yourself glancing at the general standing behind them. He was smiling, but it seemed like he was lost in thought. The joy he had when he was with you was gone. Something bad is definitely going on, you thought.
"Our ideas of fun and yours are quite different," Caracalla muttered.
What was the fun in watching people cutting each other?
"Yes, I think it is," you replied.
"Then I'm afraid you're not going to like what I'm about to say," Geta said, coming up to you.
Your eyebrows arched, seeking clarification on his meaning.
"As a family, we have been pondering the matter of two marriage proposals and have reached a decision." He gazed at Caracalla.
Caracalla laughed, which was a pretty clear sign that whatever he had to say wasn't going to be something you would like.
"Two candidates, two rivals, one fight and the winner gets the girl. How does that sound?”
"It's a real battle.” Geta grinned.
You swallowed hard, your ears were betraying you. You couldn't make sense of what you were hearing.
“What is the meaning of this?"
Geta placed his hand gently on your shoulder. "Of course, our cousin Gaius is not a warrior. He is, after all, a politician, so it seems that Macrinus' gladiator will stand for him. General Acacius is a formidable opponent, as you may know.”
You felt your whole body go numb in shock.
"That man's rage is more than enough to rival the General," Caracalla snapped.
"We'll see." Geta replied.
"There's got to be another way," you said, your voice trembling a little.
"The decision has been made. What are you worried about?" I'm sure it'll be a great game.
"Please, brother," you said, looking at Geta with pleading eyes, but he seemed determined. He made you walk a little away from them, with Caracalla accompanying you.
“Come now, sister, don't you trust the General's great fighting skills?”
The general's expression was solemn when you looked up at him from afar.
"If you choose Gaius, you might find yourself widowed pretty quickly. I'll take him out before he gets to Leptis Magna," Caracalla whispered, cruel smile appeared on his face.
Geta snickered. “Of course she won't choose that cunt,” he said, looking at you.
"If you are certain of my choice, why do you play this game? Does my decision not matter at all?"
Before Geta could reply, Caracalla spoke up. "You have accepted us as your family. Decisions like this are made between family. You should show some respect to us.”
"Besides, they should be worthy of you. You're not just any person. You're a Roman princess. Let them fight for you." Geta chuckled.
This made you even angrier. You wanted to slap them both. Everything was a game to them. But you hated that you had to risk losing Marcus because of their childish but dangerous games. You felt your chest hurt.
The festival was over for you, there was no more joy, no more fun. For the rest of the night all the laughter and music did nothing but torture you. Marcus was also silent and his face was expressionless as he looked at you from a distance.
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The city was enjoying a well-deserved rest on the first night of the festival. It seemed that everyone and everything had decided to sleep, except you. Your mind was preoccupied with a particular thought. Marcus. The thought of losing him for such a silly pastime felt so wrong. From your position on the bed, you gazed upwards at the moonlight that was gently filtering through the long window of the spacious room. The gold-embroidered part of the curtain caught your eye when it came into contact with the reflected light, as it shone gently in the moonlight. You decided to get out of bed, as you felt you couldn't sleep anyway. You thought it might be a good idea to get some fresh air. You exited the room and proceeded towards the balcony within. The view from the balcony at night was quite amazing. The Circus Maximus, the hippodrome where horse races were held during the day, appeared to be resting peacefully. The Tiber River, which flows into the sea between Palatine Hill and Aventine Hill, appeared to shine brightly in the night darkness, as though bathed in moonlight. Just beyond the river was a dirt road, the very same road you had traveled many times in a carriage towards the General's villa.
You prayed to Jupiter, hoping that he might consider allowing you to live there as his wife when he won this fight and married you. Then your gaze shifted to the silhouette of the Colosseum, the imposing structure that had previously inspired a certain ambivalence in you. Now, it seemed to stand before you as an adversary. All the battles and games that were fought in it were not enough to take the warriors who died in all the battles and games. It also seemed to want to take away the most valuable person in your life.
You were startled as you heard footsteps approaching behind you.
"I wonder what could have disturbed our princess's sleep?”
Turning your head, you noticed Julia standing beside you, clad only in her long tunic, a style of dress you were not previously accustomed to seeing her in.
Without making eye contact, she approached and placed her arms on the balustrade. You felt a certain degree of nervousness each time you saw her, and the fact that you were alone with her at this late hour only served to heighten your unease. Her long black hair was waving with the light wind of the night. She was a beautiful woman, though her eyes and lips showed a few wrinkles. Cruel beauty.
"You must be thinking about him," she murmured before you could answer.
It was pretty clear to her, even without you telling her. She was a smart woman, so you were sure she realized it the first time she saw you and the General.
"Are they taking revenge on him?" you asked.
“Because he hid you in his villa? Perhaps, but for my sons, a game is a game. Now he's part of it. Things would have turned out differently had you chosen Gaius. But the General decided his own fate from the moment he asked their permission to marry you.”
You didn't answer, despite all the feelings growing within you.
"Tiberis (Tiber River),' she murmured. You don't know how happy I was when I found out you had drowned in that river. All my worries were gone."
You remained unresponsive, a shiver ran down your spine, but it was not from the sudden wind.
“But one day you appeared, with your golden hair, the same cheeks that my husband couldn't get enough of kissing, and those innocent hazel eyes, just like the way you looked at me when you were a child, like a stupid, poor kitten. I don't know how I didn't notice the first time I saw you, I must have been so sure you were dead. I must be getting old, I suppose,” she said with a laugh.
It was as if she was having a friendly chat, which made you more nervous. As your eyes roamed the dark silhouette of the Colosseum, you realised that your real enemy was right next to you.
“Are you sure you won't regret rejecting Gaius and not going to Leptis Magna with him?” She looked at you with a hint of mockery in her eyes, but her voice was almost pleading. 'If you're smart, that's what you should do.’
You closed your eyes tightly, took a deep breath and suppressed all the curses that rushed to your tongue. ‘You wish the General to lose? I thought you trusted him?’
‘There are many soldiers in the Legates with his potential, he's not irreplaceable.’
She approached you as you were trying to control your anger. "You are the one who made him a target. You are responsible for what has happened to him and what will happen to him. Remember that, Aurelia." You could hear the hint of a threat in her voice as she said your name.
Tears rolled down your cheeks as she walked back the way she came. You were already blaming yourself. Hearing the same words from her mouth, as if from your own conscience, increased your pain even more.
Marcus... You didn't even want to consider what you'd do if something happened to him. You thought about your uncle and how he handled it when his wife passed away. He was really dedicated to his work. He felt that his only purpose in life was to try to save more people. But you weren't like him. You were sure your body couldn't handle that kind of pain. You didn't feel as strong as he did. You shook your head and tried to push these thoughts out of your mind.
You needed to be strong for him. But how could you possibly do that? How were you going to watch him out there fighting for his life when the very thought of it was enough to make your heart ache? You'd never seen him fight before, but you'd heard so much about him that you had some hope. Still, your worries held your hopes captive and not releasing them. You let your thoughts torture you for a while longer, accompanied by the sound of crickets echoing in the silence of the night, and finally you walked to your room to try to sleep.
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Temple of Mars…
The day of the fight.
The temple was relatively quiet when you arrived with Decima in the early hours of the morning. You had come here to sacrifice five pigs to Mars, the god of war. You bowed down in front of the great statue of Mars, which stood in all its majesty in the corner between the protruding tall columns inside, and joined your hands in prayer.
"My Lord, Mars, I beg you to bestow upon me the life of your son Marcus, the man I love, and grant him a victorious outcome today. Juno, the goddess of marriage, I implore you to remove all obstacles that stand in the way of me marrying the man I love. Venus, the goddess of love, I ask for your strength to fight for my love and to guide me to make it stronger. Fortuna, I ask that your fortune favour us today. Jupiter, the god of gods, I beseech you, my lord, to sharpen his sword, to give strength and power to his hands and arms, and to grant him victory. And bring him back to me safe and sound.”
You opened your eyes and saw your tears dripping on your hands, which you'd clasped together on your chest. Decima touched your shoulder and wiped your tears with her thumb.
'The gods will help him, don't you worry anymore.'
You nodded, feeling certain your prayer would be answered, now all that remained was to wait, and time was your worst enemy.
The last person you wanted to see was coming up the steps of the temple. Gaius noticed you and approached you, his smug smile infuriating you.
'My lady, I believe you've come to pray.'
'That's right, that's why I'm here, but I wonder if I might ask why you are here? I thought you weren't going to fight for yourself?" you asked sarcastically.
"I'm the one who has the advantage with the power of thought. Physical strength is of no consequence against it."
"Then perhaps you've come to the wrong temple. You should go to the temple of Mercury."
"My lady, I am in the right place because I have come here to ask Mars to grant General Acacius absolute defeat.”
You clenched your hands into fists, your whole body filled with rage.
‘Once he's out of the way, there'll be no more obstacles between us. It'll be easy to get rid of Caracalla and Geta. Their names will be forgotten. Think of the power you and I will have if we marry.’
After a long period of frustration, you finally lost your temper and slapped him in anger. Gaius wasn't upset. In fact, he seemed amused as he touched the spot where you had slapped him. The imperial guard who had been protecting you interposed himself between the two of you.
‘I'll never marry you, sir, don't even dream of it.’
‘It was your father's wish, I was with him when he wrote the letter-’ This time his eyes were sharp as he looked at you.
‘I'm not my father!’ The people praying on the steps of the temple turned to you when they realised your loud voice.
‘And he's not here, I'm Aurelia, and I decide my own life. Don't you ever threaten me again. Or my brothers. Especially the man I love.’
The imperial guard stepped forward nervously noticing people approaching you.
‘Princess Aurelia!’
You turned your head when someone called out your name. They quickly gathered around you, looking at you with sincerity and admiration. Gaius seemed uncomfortable with them.
One woman approached you and said, "My lady, we've heard that the General Acacius will fight for you, so we pray for his safety and survival.”
They had come here with the same intention as you, which made you very happy.
'The General has saved this city many times, we're grateful to him,' someone said.
'We're still breathing thanks to him!' another shouted. You looked at Gaius with a smile, a smile he knew the meaning of ‘Suck it’.
‘I think you’re done here, Sir Gaius.’
The crowd regarded him with a certain degree of displeasure, and some of them advanced towards him. Gaius retreated, nearly losing his footing on the stairs in the process. As he made his way out of the area, the crowd turned their attention to you.
“Thanks to your prayers, General Acacius will hopefully achieve a victory today at the Colosseum.”
The crowd responded with joyous shouts. They were now shouting his name. As you smiled at them and descended the stairs, you noticed a familiar face ahead. Octavius was standing by his horse and, upon recognising you, approached you with haste.
‘My lady, you summoned me.
You asked for him before you came to the temple because you wanted to speak to him about something.
'Yes, thank you for coming by.'
'Of course, my lady,' he bowed his head respectfully.
You gave him a smile. 'It seems you were right all along.'
He looked at you, surprised. 'I beg your pardon, my lady?'
“You always called me a lady, and you were right. I was. You were always kind to me, Octavius. Even when you knew I was a slave, you were always respectful, and I'm grateful to you for that.”
“The pleasure's mine, my lady. But may I ask why you wanted to see me?’
'As a good friend of the general, I wanted to ask you to take me to him before the fight.’
Octavius’ expression changed. 'My lady, with all due respect, this is no place for women.’
You looked at him with absolute determination. 'Otherwise I wouldn't have asked you to accompany me, would I?'
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The Colosseum…
Hours before the battle…
The Colosseum had lots of rooms and underground passages. This was where animals and gladiators were kept, waiting to meet their fate in the arena above. It wasn't a straightforward place to get into, especially not for a woman.
Octavius was pretty nervous about letting you into this underground tunnel. If you'd asked the royal guards to do it, it'd probably have got back to Geta or Caracalla, who'd have wanted to stop or prevent you. But you had to see him before he steps into the arena.
However, your plan was about to be thwarted. The guards at the entrance to the large iron gate were quite big and stopped you.
'There's no room for women here, so you'd better go back.'
Even if you wore a cloak, your clothes and hair showed your physical features. So you decided to remove it.
"I'm Princess Aurelia. Let me through, please. I'd like to speak with General Acacius."
The guards looked at each other, unsure of what to do. Did they think you were lying?
'Why would a princess come with only one soldier?' one of the guards asked.
'I'm the general's second-in-command, Octavius. Let us through, now.' Octavius ordered.
'My lady!''
You heard a familiar voice and looked in that direction. It was Macrinus.
His voice came from inside, and soon he appeared at the door.
'How dare you keep the Princess waiting at the gate? Let her through, now!'
The men immediately bowed their heads, apologised and opened the gate.
'My lady, I think you're here to see the General?' His smile made you feel uneasy, as it always did.
Octavius picked up a torch and followed you at a safe distance, each sound echoing off the narrow walls as he travelled through the stone tunnels.
"I understand your wish to see him for the last time.”
You stopped suddenly, your footsteps echoed through the cave-like walls.
"Sir Macrinus, if I may continue with Sir Octavius for the rest of the way."
Macrinus smiled and said, 'As you wish, my lady. I'm done here anyway. I'll see you upstairs in the stands.' He walked towards the door. You continued on your way, not letting his confident demeanour unnerve you.
'Oh, by the way, don't be scared when you see the tiger ahead, he can smell fear,' he said before walking out the door.
You couldn't believe your ears. Did he mean it metaphorically? You looked at Octavius, who didn't look surprised.
‘It's in a cage, don't worry,’ he explained.
‘Tiger, a real tiger?’ You raised your eyebrow.
‘Yes. There are many animals here, stay close to me, my lady.’
A little later, you came to a roundabout where another iron gate was waiting for you. This time, you could hear lots of voices coming from the corridors. You could hear lots of men, swords being sharpen, doors opening and closing, and a roar. When you saw the corridor where the animals were kept, you had a bit of a shock. The tiger was there, a big one, much bigger than you'd imagined when you'd heard its name. And it was just as scary. You stood there, frozen in fear, locked in its green eyes, as if it was trying to find where the fear was hiding inside you. It was an amazingly beautiful and an extremely dangerous predator. A moment later, it let out a roar as if it had found the fear. Octavius grabbed you by the shoulders as you jumped back, trembling with fear.
'Are you alright, my lady?' Let's head back if you're not feeling well.
You couldn't help but laugh hysterically. 'It's beautiful.’ you swallowed hard.
Octavius confused.
You tried to pull yourself together quickly and concentrate on the reason you had come here, but the tiger was so beautiful that you couldn't take your eyes off him. Before long, one of the guards prodded the tiger's hind leg with a spear. The animal let out a roar in pain but then collapsed and rested its huge head on its front legs.
The guard bowed to you and said, 'It's a dangerous animal, my lady. You shouldn't get too close.'
You nodded at him, but it was hard to believe that such a beautiful and dangerous animal could be so close. You could stare at it for hours.
'My lady, this way,' Octavius said, pointing the other corridor. There were gladiators and other warriors in this corridor. All waiting to fight resting in dungeons, conditions were unfavourable. As you passed through them, you bowed your head, feeling their curious eyes on you.
You felt regret taking off your cloak, because you were wearing a elegant dress that left your arms and neck exposed, and revealing that you belonged to the imperial family. You had Geta to thank for that, after all, lately he loved to interfere with your attire.
“A princess?”
“Look at this beauty.”
“I would gladly die for you, my beautiful lady.”
A few masculine whistles and laughs, murmurs, you could feel your cheeks turning red, your mouth got dry. Hearing a few dirty comments, Octavius kicked the iron bars of the cell where they were being held.
“Shut the hell up!”
You fellt relief to move from this corridor to another, quieter one, where you saw a familiar face. It was Cato, the General's squire.
"My lady, sir." He greeted you.
Instead of iron bars, there was an iron door and an armoury. It was filled with swords, axes, bows and arrows, shields and many other implements of war.
"Is the General inside?" Octavius asked.
"Yes, I just helped him put on his armour," he said and knocked on the door.
You were nervous and excited, and when the door opened, Octavius nodded then looked at you.
You walked through the door with quick steps, met his eyes. The eyes you had come all this way for.
His eyes showed surprise and then anger.
“I'll leave you two alone.” Octavius closed the door and left to avoid her harsh gaze.
“What are you doing here,” he came toward you, so attractive even in his anger.
“I needed to see you, before...” you swallowed, unable to finish the sentence.
“It's not appropriate for you to be here, how could you do that?”
The general seemed to be wearing his leather armbands.
“Let me,” you murmured and approached him.
He held out his arm for you and waited, all the while keeping his eyes on you.
Once you finished, put your hands on his broad shoulders. Under your hands you felt the material of the leather armor he had just put on. It was the same armor he wore when you first met, with gold detailing on the edges and a medusa on his chest. His expression softened at your touch.
"You always act without thinking," he said with a hint of disapproval.
"I've heard that before," you replied with a smile.
He placed his hands on your waist and pulled you closer to him, his eyes tracing the outline of your lips. You could feel his gaze on them.
"You are my only weakness, your presence is the only thing that distracts me."
"Perhaps it would be best if I waited here for you? I don't want to watch anyway.”
"No," he said, shaking his head. "I'd like you to sit there and watch me." He cupped your face between his hands, and you could feel your heart beating faster. "Because, my beautiful princess,, it's only you who gives me strength."
Marcus pressed his lips to yours and kissed you gently.
"I prayed in the temple for you to win," you whispered. "Marcus, you have to win. I can't bear to see anything happen to you."
"I will win, my lady. For you, for us." He kissed your forehead and embraced you.
You prayed the gods for the last time as you resting your head on his chest, your body in his arms. Suddenly the sound of drums startled you. Turned your head in the direction of the sound, accompanied by the sound of the crowd and whistles. Marcus pressed his lips to the top of your head and pulled himself back.
“It's time, you'd better go now.”
You nodded. “I love you, Marcus.” your voice was shaking.
One of his heart-melting smiles appeared on his face.
“I love you more, my beautiful Aurelia.”
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Ima Cavea… (tribune that reserved for the Emperor and senates)
“Sister, where were you? You were almost late.” Geta scolded you. You were pleased that Julia was sitting next to Caracalla, while you sat in one of the gold-embroidered seats belonging to the royal family next to Geta. The farther away from her the better it was for you. However, Gaius was sitting right next to you and smiling at you in a way that made you feel uneasy. You turned your head away from him and looked at Geta.
“What happened to your face?”
He rolled his eyes. “War makeup, if you hadn't gone to the temple earlier I would have given you this makeup too, tough luck sister.” he said pursing his lips.
“Good thing I preferred to go to the temple then,” you muttered.
He laughed. Caracalla whispered something in his ear. Geta leaned toward you with a mischievous expression. “Would you like to give the opening speech?”
You gave him a stink-eye. He grinned with all his teeth at your expression.
“Okay, I'll do it.”
He stood up and took a step forward, raising his arms in salute as the announcer announced his name to the crowd.
“People of Rome! We are gathered today for an epic closing to the last day of the festival. The day's champions of the auspicious ceremony, incredibly talented gladiators, will fight and stand for our beloved cousin Gaius Septimius Severus Aper!”
“He forgot to mention ‘consul ordinarius’ title of mine.” Gaius said, offended.
“No one cares,” you snapped.
Caracalla laughed hard, Geta joined him in, both looking at you like ‘good one’. You ignored them, not in the mood for jokes.
With the sound of drums and trumpets, the iron gates opened with roar and four gladiators entered the arena. You weren't an expert in fighting and you didn't have a lot of experience as a spectator, but you had a pretty good idea of what to expect. But why were there four gladiators? Caracalla stood up and came to Geta, applauding with excitement and joy. The gladiators stood in position in front of your tribune with their shields and spears and gave the salute.
“Ave Imperatores, morituri te salutant!” Hail Emperors, those who are about to die salute you!”
“In fact, you should salute both us and our sister today,” he beckoned you to him. You opened your eyes wide, not expecting surely. Julia let out a hissing sound, and the senators murmured behind you. As you stood up, the crowd started to cheer louder. You took Geta's hand, tentatively at first.
“Princess Aurelia!” Crowded shouted.
You whispered to Geta as the crowd chanted your name.
“Wasn't there supposed to be a one-on-one fight?”
“That would be boring, wouldn't it, my dear?”
"Clearly you haven't had the opportunity to observe the General in combat before, Caracalla said, leaning towards you behind Geta. “Hurry brother, call him to show up, lets get them started at once,” he whined to him, clapping his hands.
Geta nodded, “And the man who will fight against them is known and respected by all of you, The Glorius General Marcus Acacius, commander of the southern armies, General of the Six Legions and protector of Rooome!”
Geta's loud cry was pretty deafening.
The soldiers who opened the other door for their General greeted him and wished him good fortune. The crowd roared as Marcus, sword in hand shining under the sunlight, the sands of the arena turning to dust beneath his feet as he stepped in front of the gladiators. You experienced a range of emotions simultaneously, including excitement, tension, fear unease.
Marcus turned towards you, put his sword on his shoulder, nodded.
“Ave Imperatores, ave Filia Regis, morituri te salutant!” Hail Emperors, hail Princess, who are about to die salute you!”
Even though the word ‘about to die’ hurts, you smiled at him, and he bowed his head in response.
“Begiiiin!” Geta shouted.
“Gods bear witneeeeess!” Caracalla joined him.
The crowd went wild with excitement, and the beat of the drums grew louder. Since the gladiators were discussing strategy and walking away from him Marcus turned to face the other way, looks very calm. It didn't seem fair that they had spears, swords at their waists and shields in their hands, but Marcus had only a sword. Had he specifically chosen it himself? It didn't make sense, and you were almost angry with Marcus for it. But you were about to be wrong.
As one of the gladiators ran towards Marcus, he took a defensive stance, kicked the sand off the ground with the tip of his toe and darted towards him. In a swift and decisive move, he dodged his attack by spinning as if he was dancing and struck him hard with his sword from behind. Marcus quickly picked up the shield that had fallen from his hand and turned to the others, your eyes fixed on the sand where blood from the cut spread across the floor of the arena. You stared with your jaw dropped.
Geta and Caracalla looked at each other with laughter. They cursed and commented, their eyes fixed on the action. You observed Gaius, seated next to you, appearing somewhat disgruntled, which prompted a smile to emerge on your face. Yet you tensed again as the three remaining gladiators circling around Marcus. He glanced at each of them, ready for any attack. One of them roared and charged at him, pointing the tip of his spear at him, the long spear jabbed, but Marcus grabbed the tip of his shield, shoved it aside and charged at the gladiator, his great sword flashing. The gladiator swung his spear back, then thrust again. The metal screamed as the tip of the spear slipped from Marcus' shield, cutting the surface and leaving a long, shiny scratch. Another gladiator lunged with his spear, but Marcus turned quickly, allowing it to pierce the shield, but the gladiator could not get it back out and Marcus took advantage of it and swung his sword at him, cutting his exposed leg off. The man let out a cry of pain as blood began to flow from his wound, spreading across the sandy ground. Marcus made one last move and rushed after the other, cutting his neck and the gladiator's lifeless body sprawled on the sandy ground. Other gladiator grunted furiously. He made a ponderous charge to hack at the Marcus's head. He avoided him easily. The crowd roared, whistling and Geta gave a hysterical laugh and clapped. You were uncertain as to how much more nervous you could become. You felt your heart beating in your throat. The two remaining gladiators exchanged glances and signalled to one another. Marcus observed them with his keen gaze, considering the most strategic approach to the upcoming confrontation, taking the movement of their feet into account. One of them made a quick lunge for his stomach, but Marcus was thrown back and it was ineffective. Marcus cut him, but not where he wanted, he missed.
Then, dodging at the last moment as the gladiator lunged for his right breast, he lunged for the tip of the spear. Marcus was close enough to strike suddenly, his sword gleaming in a blur of steel. The crowd screamed as well. As the tip of the spear was useless, the Gladiator threw it away and drew his sword, but Marcus was much faster, grasping quickly the spear that the other gladiator he had just cut down had left on the ground and thrusting it deep into his groin. The gladiator groaned in pain and staggered backwards, struggling to stand and finally collapsing to his knees. The last remaining gladiator, the banquet-show gladiator, Macrinus' and Geta's favourite, lunged angrily at Marcus. Geta stood up excitedly, Caracalla leaned forward to see better, and you put your hands together and began to pray. He was the gladiator you feared the most.
Metal met metal with an ear-splitting clang, sending the Marcus reeling. Gladiator followed, bellowing. They didn't use words anymore, just animalistic roaring.The gladiator was the first to move, throwing his spear at Marcus as he ran, missing. This time he drew his sword and lunged at him with a roar, throwing his shield at him as well, Marcus paused in the blink of an eye as the pain of the struck shield caused his elbow. But the sword was making several thrusts at him, and Marcus's retreat turned into a flight backwards, only inches in front of the great sword that cut through his chest, arms and wrist. You jumped to your feet, Marcus' cuts weren't very deep, but they were enough to make you cried out.
Marcus heard you, but he had to pretend he didn't. He was determined to concentrate and get it over with. He ignored the pain of his cuts and looked at the gladiator, who was smiling triumphantly at him.
Rejoice now while you can, Marcus thought.
He memorised the gladiator's footwork and swiftly planned his attack. The gladiator made the first move, his shiny sword grazing the surface of Marcus' shield with a deafening sound. Marcus seized the opportunity and brought his sword down on the gladiator's head. But it was a ruse. As the gladiator raised his sword to retaliate, Marcus slashed his muscular thigh and kicked him to the ground. The gladiator was dazed by the fall, and Marcus stepped on his hand with his foot, taking the sword from him and hurling it across the arena.The crowd cheered, and Geta gave a standing ovation and shouted with joy.
'What a battle!'
'It's over too soon,' Caracalla grumbled. You were starting to relax a little, but the blood dripping from Marcus's shoulder wasn't helping. When he glanced back at you, you smiled and hoped he saw it.
The crowd suddenly started shouting in unison.
‘KIll! KIll! KIll!’
Marcus looked at Geta. With his arm outstretched, everyone eagerly awaits his decision. But you could already see it in his honey-coloured eyes. Geta turned his thumb down.
The crowd went wild again, cheering and screaming. Marcus looked down at the gladiator, who was barely breathing, lying on the ground. He raised his sword and the man closed his eyes. Marcus may have fought like a beast, but he was no bloodthirsty villain. He brought the sword down swiftly and it stabbed through the sand right next to the gladiator's head. The crowd fell silent. Murmurs replaced the shouts. Geta frowned. Caracalla leaned down from the balustrade in frustration.
‘What the hell is he doing?’
‘Kill him!’ Geta shouted.
You were so moved by Marcus's behavior that your eyes filled with tears.
Soon the crowd was shouting the chant once used for the great General Maximus.
‘Marcus the merciful!’
Marcus smiled at them and made a gesture of respect, honouring his former commander.
'That's just like him,' Geta commented.
Caracalla made a face. You were happy and proud of him, you couldn't be more in love with him.
Marcus walked towards to you while the crowd chanting his name and his new nickname.
'My Emperors, I fought for you and I won, and I believe I have a right to claim what is rightfully mine.' His eyes shifted to you. It was hard not to throw yourself from where you stood into his strong arms.
Geta laughed, applauding him.
"Naturally, our champion will receive what he deserves." He gazed at you and said, "Let us begin preparations for the wedding of General Acacius and our sister Princess Aurelia at once."
You felt a slight blush come over your cheeks as the crowd expressed their enthusiasm by chanting and cheering your names. Caracalla sat back in his throne and appeared to be somewhat disgruntled. Gaius had already departed. Then the iron gates of the arena opened, and the General was surrounded by his soldiers, who embraced him joyfully, including Octavius. Geta was observing you as you smiled at Marcus with joy, and he was surprised to realise that for the first time in his life he was experiencing a sense of happiness for someone else.
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@myownwholewildworld @orcasoul @pedroslut4eva @immyowndefender @lailathepedritofan @screechingchildfury @shinymusicpanda @somedayheaven @ivoryandflame @negrita2345 @music-lover09 @javiismyhsbnd @idontcareihavenoidea @jisungandpedrolover @mmkkzz @ro-nahime-things
if anyone wants me to tag them please comment :) thank you all <3
#fanfiction#fanfic#pedro pascal fandom#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal gifs#pedro pascal#ao3 fanfic#gladiator movie#gladiator 2#gladiator ii#marcus acacius x reader#general marcus acacius#marcus acacius#general acacius#marcus acacius x you#emperor geta#geta#emperor caracalla#marcus acacias x reader#marcus acacius smut#marcus acacius x female reader#marcus acacius x oc#marcurelia
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OMG- SUZU'S REQUESTS ARE OPENNNN-
Could I request Scaramouche and Wanderer as the reader's step brothers?? They're twins, their mom is engaged to our mom-
When the parents started dating, they both thought about introducing their children to each other if the date goes well- their 5th date, they both decided to bring their children! So we meet them, bla bla bla-
She's an innocent little shi- purely because she doesn't talk with people, and was homeschooled most of her life-
Scaramouche and Wanderer both thought she was so fucking stupid, and they find it cute(somehow😭🙏🏻)-
When their parents got engaged, they(our mom and us) moved in with them(Scara, Wanderer, and Ei)—
She wore revealing things around the house and she doesn't know how Scaramouche and Wanderer thought about that, she wasn't really used to being around guys, considering that she's only been with her mother and stuff like that-
They've been holding out for weeks- one day, they both just couldn't hold back anymore- they waited until their parents were gone for their date, then they took their chance.
(can we also fast forward to the wedding day?? After the wedding, our parents went to- uhm- screw eachother-🙏🏻
While our parents got on with that shit, they also screwed us. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻) -exclude this if you want:>
(Something specificccc- can this include bondage?)
Have a wonderful and amazing day, Suzu!!🖤
Don't forget to take care of yourself!!🖤
Here, some flowers to my favorite writer 💐🌹🌷💐
🖤🖤🖤
stepcest, DNI if it makes you uncomfortable, please. scaramouche x fem! reader. wanderer x fem!reader. smut. threesome. bondage. degradation. scaramouche receiving. wanderer giving. sex toy for funsies.
thank you so much 🥺 it always makes my day hearing i am someone's favorite writer ❤️ this is kinda dirty.
scaramouche and wanderer certainly didn't expect for their mother to want to marry. or to gain a stepsister. a sweet, delicate stepsister they both wanted to devour.
you are so sweet and innocent. very naive having been homeschooled. dumb in an curious and quite frankly adorable way. quiet as a mouse. you didn't even like making noise at night if you knew other people were asleep.
you didn't have any idea what you did to them. you always wore things that highlighted every dip and curve of your body. tank tops and low cut shirts that your breasts spilled out of if you leaned over. short, pleated skirts with thigh highs. today in particular you'd woren a skirt wanderer in particular enjoyed seeing you in, with thigh highs that made him want to sink down underneath the table in the kitchen and fuck his tongue into your pussy.
tonight was the night. the moment the mom's left on their date, they were going to take you. they felt you were ready for them, and they couldn't hold back anymore.
you were also hiding a secret of your own. you had an enormous crush on both of your stepbrothers. you weren't supposed to have feelings like that. they were never supposed to know and honestly, it was no surprise that caved easily to them.
your cheeks flushed dark realizing the position you were in. you were laying on your bed, legs spread and naked. your wrists were handcuffed above your head, wanderer slotted between your thighs. his tongue is greedily enjoying devouring your hole.
had both of wanderer's hands not been busy holding your legs spread with one, the other wagging and teasing the vibrator they both knew you had on your clit, he would've reached down and stroked his straining cock feeling your body twitching in pleasure in his hand.
his tongue swept languidly over your pussy, drunk on your taste. he alternated between fucking his tongue into your whole and pumping the vibrator in and out of your creamy cunt. he moaned shakily, latching his lips around your throbbing clit.
scaramouche was kneeling at your head, his cock pulsing as he watched your face contort in pleasure. wanderer was pulling moans from you that quite frankly made him feel jealous. grasping the back of your head, he turned it so you were looking at him. he poked his leaking cockhead against your lips.
your cheeks flushed as he smeared precum on your lips. you opened your mouth, scooping his cock head into your mouth to suck on. "who knew our stepsister was such a slut," he groaned, gritted his teeth as your mouth sucked wet and eager. grasping a handful of your hair, he bobbed your mouth up and down on his cock.
wanderer's eyes rolled closed, tasting your pussy clench on his tongue. his thumb turned up the settling on the vibrator, drool pooling from the corner of your mouth as you muffled moans on scaramouche's cock. jolts of pleasure shot through your body, your clit throbbing harder from the increased vibrations. "fuck, she's so close to cumming," he moaned huskily, his mouth sucking and working your pussy over in ways you'd only fingered yourself at night thinking about.
you were helpless, wrists delicately cuffed above your head. you wanted so badly to reach down and tangle your fingers in wanderer's soft hair, pressing his mouth down onto your cunt while you grinded your clit shamelessly on the vibrator.
scoffing, scaramouche pulled his cock from your mouth. a string of salvia connected your tongue to his cock. "shaking like a leaf, what a whore," as good as your pretty mouth felt taking his cock, he was quite content to fist his cock watching your body twitched with your impending orgasm. it was a treat watching you struggle to keep it together.
"please, please..feels so good," you choked back a whimper bubbling up behind your moans. scaramouche was far more pent up than he thought he was. your plea made cum spill out onto your chest. the frustration of not fucking you caught up with him.
as much as wanderer wanted to taste you creaming on his tongue, it was intoxicating to keep you on the edge. you sure had been slowly edging them without doing anything when they first met you. he shut the vibrator off, smirking at your whimper of protest as he took his mouth off your cunt. "be a good girl, and take it, slut," he teased, delivering a wet tap to your clit.
your cheeks flushed with adoration, your back arching off the bed, moaning from the teasingly rough treatment. scaramouche moved away from your head, as wanderer moved to your head. pulling you down the bed some by your ankle, he hastily spread your legs, grinding his cock head on your clit.
your hips immediately rocked up to rub your clit on the tip, your breath hitching in your throat in anticipation. your pussy was puffy and aching to be stretched apart by scaramouche's cock.
"stroke, but don't make me cum," wanderer hissed, taking your hand and putting it on his cock. he wants so badly to cum inside of you, even though your breasts would look twice as good spattered with his cum mixing with scaramouche's.
you stroked and pumped your hand on wanderer's cock, massaging your thumb on the head. the blush on your cheeks darkened feeling his cock pulse in your hand. "good girl," he sighed shakily, rutting into your hand.
your moans rose to a shameless octave as scaramouche pushed his cock inside of you. you gasped in pleasure feeling him slowly stretch you apart,your body shaking as he bottomed out with a harsh but languid thrust. the chilly metal of the handcuffs rubbed against your wrists as your fingernails dug into the palms of your hands.
"slut was practically been begging to be fucked by us," scaramouche moaned huskily, firmly grasping and kneading his fingers into the soft flesh of your thighs. he didn't hold back anything in his thrusts, pumping his cock into you almost carelessly, all his frustration of holding himself back all this time releasing all at once.
you saw stars as his cock bullied into your sweet spot, bringing you even closer to the edge. your poor little body was wracked and nearly limp with pleasure. you struggled to form words to tell him how good his cock felt, but another burst of pleasure only caused them to fall away broken into moans.
wanderer's fingers dipped down to tease and pinch one of your hardened nipples, sending stronger shocks of pleasure to your clit. "fuck, i can feel you cumming," scaramouche hissed, letting out a satisfied, husky groan. his cock pulsed as your walls clutched tight while you creamed on his cock.
scaramouche's milky cum ribboned inside of you, your pathetic moans of pleasure fueling his thrusts as he chased his high. wanderer batted your hand away from his cock before his cum spilled into it. you hadn't even come down from your orgasm before wanderer was bullying his cock inside of you.
a softer part of scaramouche showed briefly for a moment, moving up to your head once he pulled out to rest your head in his lap. "you are all ours now, doll," he purred condescendingly down at you, taking hold of your cuffed wrists to keep them in place, the fingers of his free hand stroking through your hair.
"good girl," wanderer moaned, surrendering himself to the tight, warm feeling of your pussy, "keep crying for me just like that."
you were made for them, after all.
#genshin impact#genshin smut#fem!reader#genshin imagines#tw stepcest#scaramouche#scaramouche smut#scaramouche x reader#scaramouche x y/n#scaramouche x you#wanderer#wanderer smut#wanderer x y/n#wanderer x you#wanderer x reader#modern au
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AURORA
ᴺᵒʳᵗʰᵉʳⁿ ˡⁱᵍʰᵗˢ
༘✩ Summary: A relationship that survived a breakup but could not be forgotten. Like the northern lights that appear only at certain moments, their feelings had their peaks and troughs, but always remained on the horizon. You meet your ex at some event. The feelings are still alive.
༘✩ Couple: Jeon Jungkook/ The Reader
༘✩Age restrictions: 18+
༘✩ Size: one shot
༘✩ Tags: ex to lovers, longing, smurt, cursing, sex, unprotected sex, detailed description of explicit scenes, alcohol
༘✩ Dedication: This work is dedicated to my beloved Armys. I wrote this work thinking of you. I hope this work resonates with you - @myjungkookthighs, @kelsyx33, @someoneelse0109, @mskookie, @kooccult, , @smokinghotstargirl , @curse-of-art, @rispwr, @kooko007
༘✩ From author: I have long dreamed of writing a story like this and here it is in one day. I tried my best for you and I really hope you will like the way I described the love that does not die, even if it seems that it is the end. Inspired by a song I found not so long ago and it immediately associated me with Jungkook💜❤️🔥💘 And I'll add another one, the lyrics of which are also here. Enjoy 🙏🏻🥰
You didn't expect to see him. You thought you would never see him again in your life. Certainly not here, among dozens of strangers, in a room flooded with soft light that resembled the glare of the northern lights. But he was here.
Your eyes meet and your heart skips a beat. He is approaching, accompanied by one of the organizers of the event you have come to. He keeps his eyes on you and you can't look away either. He seems to be the only one who could touch the strings of your soul, and they seem to be starting to pluck.
He approaches and stops a few steps away. He didn't expect to see you again either. Your last words had clearly created a great gulf between you that neither of you could cross.
He was not prepared for his heart to beat faster and his breath to become ragged, as if after a long run. But he couldn't show it, he had to control himself.
"Y/N would like to introduce you to one of our biggest sponsors. Jeon Jungkook." - He introduce Jungkook. "And Mr. Jeon, this is Y/N Y/L/N. She's a writer with whom our publishing house works." - Your eyes are greedy. You literally study each other, trying to find what has changed. And if anything has changed at all.
You look at him, waiting for him to behave. Will he pretend that you don't know each other? Or will he say that there is no need to introduce you? Because you used to be the whole world to each other.
"It's nice to meet you, Y/N." - Jungkook says. So he chooses not to be an acquaintance. Hmm, in fact, he is.
"Likewise." - You reply briefly and discreetly. Jungkook pulls your hand towards him and you put yours in his. An electric pulse goes through your whole body.
He has the same look in his eyes. The same movements you know. You used to know every detail about each other. And then you lost it.
This man in front of you was your ex-boyfriend. He was the man who made you feel like the world stopped when you were with him. He was your passion, your trusted friend, your lover. Everything between you was intense and pure, but like everything that burns brightly, it burned out. The breakup was hard and painful.
You felt your heart flutter at the familiar touch. It was more than physical contact - it was like coming home after a long journey. You didn't want it, but just like then, you couldn't shake this deep attachment. You tried to forget him, tried to let him go, but he was remained by you every day, in you every thought. And now, when your hand is back in his, you realized that you was never really ready to let go.
"I read your story. It's amazing. I'm not surprised why it's so successful." - Jungkook says, and you think you're going to fall through the floor. He's a great actor, you've always known that. But you're don’t. Even though your heart is burning with excitement and old feelings are bubbling to the surface, you think you have to go. You can't even let him be with you, because you'll lose all control.
But let's be honest, the walls you've been building for six months since the breakup has cracked. Just looking at him makes you want him to be yours again.
"I am sincerely grateful for your words. But to be honest, you don't strike me as someone who reads romance novels." - You can't contain your sarcasm. Jungkook laughs lightly, his husky voice vibrating, and this vibration ignite your bones.
"Actually, Mr. Jeon is a very creative person. He's a professional photographer." - The event organizer explains, not realizing how much these words can make your heart beat faster. Because you know his profession well.
Jungkook smiles, his eyes rest on you again, and his words sound as if he wants to share something more intimate.
"Yes, I often photograph couples." - He says, his voice softening as if he's immersed in his memories. "For me, photography is not just art, it's a way to feel emotions. Sometimes music, movies, or even novels can inspire moments that seem real only through the lens." - You can't help but smile. He's fended off your sarcastic attack, but the thing is, you doubt he could have read your novel.
Jungkook glances down at your red silk dress, which fits your figure perfectly, seductively emphasizing all the curves of your body. Curves that were once his territory. The curves he knows so well, the ones he's touched so many times
Jungkook holds his breath for a moment. He remembers how that delicate skin trembled under his fingers, how your breath grew deeper every time his hands traveled over your body. And now, looking at you, he feels an almost unbearable urge to run his fingertips over your collarbone again, to go lower, to run his hands around your waist, to put his hand on your lower back, where his touch always made you moan slightly.
His imagination shamelessly draws pictures of that red silk fabric slowly sliding off your body, revealing to him everything he remembers so well. His fingers involuntarily clench into a fist - the desire is too sharp, too real. He knows he has no right to touch you, knows that there is a gaping hole between you, created not only by hurt feelings but also by time.
But, damn it, how much he wants to reach out, to touch at least the ends of your hair, to run his fingers over your cheek, to feel the warmth of your skin again.
And then, when you finally catch his gaze, he quickly masks the thirst in his eyes with a barely noticeable smile. If only you knew what's going on in his head right now. If you knew that this evening is awakening in him what he has been trying to suppress for so long.
"Then I apologize for my hasty conclusions. I am sincerely grateful that you read my work." - You say and quickly add, because you can't stand Jungkook's company anymore. If he wants you to be strangers, you should stay strangers forever. "It was nice to meet you. Have a nice evening." - You say, giving the men a casual smile and walk away, barely able to keep yourself together. You don't let Jungkook know how much of an impact he has on you, even six months later.
After the breakup, your life turned into an endless marathon of forgetting, although in reality you were just trying not to remember. Your heart was cut like glass, and your mind was exhausted from trying to make yourself stronger. Every day you were learning a new role: a successful woman who was moving forward, even though your inner world was in ruins.
There was no shortage of men around. They came and went-attractive, confident, ready to give you everything you lacked. But each of them remained a shadow, and even the best moments with them felt empty compared to what you had with him. Those evenings when they spent together in bed, or just watching a movie in each other's arms, when there was no time, no space, nothing but your two hearts beating in unison.
You were trying to be "normal," trying to find your way and not think about him. If someone had told you six months ago that he would reappear in your life, you would have laughed, because you were sure that you would never let that happen again. You did everything you could to forget. You immersed yourself in work, wrote, traveled, had short-term meetings, but all of this was just a temporary escape from your own pain.
Over time, you thought, that you might actually be left alone, just to find myself again. You were no longer looking for someone who could give you back the feeling of the real connection that you had. It was your choice, your decision to try to relive this love that you couldn't forget.
But all fate decides. It's not interested in your plans or his plans. It has its own plan and it made sure that your paths crossed again. You are afraid that you won't be able to resist if Jungkook tries to make contact. You love him, but it's unlikely that you'll ever be together again.
The official event is over. You stay at the afterparty. When you enter the restaurant where the party is taking place, you feel a lot of stares. But you are not interested. You stayed after the event because you are excited. Because of the meeting with Jungkook, you can't get rid of the obsessive thoughts and feelings that want to find him and be with him until the morning.
You cautiously study the crowd around you. You don't find Jungkook. Somewhere in the back of your mind, you hope that he has already left, that your chance meeting was just a game of chance, and that's enough. But the part of you that never learned to forget him feels empty.
You stand at the bar, twirling your wine glass in your fingers, letting yourself relax. The atmosphere of an afterparty is lighter, more relaxed than an official event. People are laughing, the music is flowing with a soft rhythm, making your body sway slightly.
And then you feel it. A gaze. His gaze.
Like an echo of the past that won't let go. At first, you don't turn your head, don't give him that pleasure. But you can't stand it, and your eyes meet. You literally give him a second of your gaze, look away. This is enough for him. He comes closer, stands next to you. His perfume is a familiar scent that makes your pulse quicken. A scent that makes you almost crazy.
"Dancing?" - His voice is low, almost inaudible over the music, but it cuts to the core. You look up at him. His eyes are dark, deep, something has changed in them, but at the same time they are still the same. The eyes that looked at you with love and passion.
"I don't think that's a good idea." - You answer, sipping your wine so that he doesn't notice your excitement.
"Come on. It's just a dance." - He holds out his hand and you look at it. You hesitate, but the devil on your shoulder whispers: you want this. He wants this. Go. Go with him. It's just one night. And you make a choice. You put your hand in his.
He leads you to the dance floor. A slow, sensual melody fills the space between you. His hand on your waist is hot, his fingers gently squeezing the silk fabric of your dress. With his other hand, he holds your palm in his, gently but firmly.
You move to the music, his body almost touching yours. It's not just a dance - it's a dangerous game, a test of willpower. And you seem to have already lost. He has deprived you of all willpower.
You look into his eyes and try to understand what is in his mind. What does he want? Just to know what your life has become? Or does he want to try to cross the line? Jungkook's smile is mysterious. The hole from piercing on his lip stretches. You make a titanic effort not to look at his lips.
You dance, every movement a dangerous test. His hand slides to the small of your back and your breath hits you. He always touched you like this - confidently but slowly, as if he was savoring every moment.
But suddenly he leans a little closer, his lips dangerously close to your ear.
"It's... so familiar, isn't it?" - His voice is husky, and you know he feels the same way you do. It's an unrestrained desire to give in to the feelings that overwhelm you. You pull away and look up, catching his eyes. There, in their dark abyss, something forbidden flashes. Memories. A desire.
"It's in the past for me." - You lie. "The past should stay in the past." - You try to make your voice sound confident, but you don't seem to be succeeding. His hand presses lightly on your back.
"Do you really believe that?" - He asks. The silence between you says more than words. You are standing on the edge of an abyss where it is so easy to fall.
You don't know what to say. Your heart is pounding furiously in your chest, and your hands seem to remember what it feels like to touch it, to feel its warmth. You continue to move to the music, but now everything seems even slower, even more tense.
His fingers gently run down your back, a barely perceptible touch that leaves a pulsating trail. He leans in a little closer, his breath burning your skin.
"You say the past should stay where it is." - He smiles at the corner of his lips, as if he can read your thoughts. "But it seems to be catching up with us, Y/N."
You want to object, to say something prickly, but your body is treacherously drawn to him. His hand moves even lower down your back, almost on your buttocks. It makes you hold your breath. This is nothing. It's a game you've both played before. But didn't you know that things always go over the top with Jungkook?
You stop. He stops too. There are only a few centimeters between you, but it's enough to make every cell in your body burn.
"Jungkook..." - You whisper, not even knowing what you want to say. He looks at you, carefully, almost painfully slowly. His gaze slides across your face, lingers on your lips, and then meets yours again.
"Tell me I have to stop." - He whispers, leaning closer, barely touching your cheek with his nose. "I won't touch you unless you let me." - He says it quietly but confidently. And this is the cruelest thing. Because you don't know what will be worse for you - if he actually touches you or if he pulls away.
You want to tell him to stop. You really do. But instead, your fingers involuntarily clamp down on the fabric of his jacket, not allowing you to move away.
"I can't..." - You give up. So quickly, so foolishly. This admission was enough.
His lips touch your neck very lightly, causing a shiver to run through your body. You sigh, tilting your head as if to give him more access. And he does not refuse.
"Why do you still have this effect on me?" - You protest out loud. He was quiet, almost broken by his own feelings. He ran his fingers along your collarbone, causing your eyes to close.
"Because we never really let go of each other." - He said what you needed to hear. What you hadn't allowed yourself to admit for six months.
You inhale sharply, meeting his gaze. Deep, dark, full of desire. Another moment, and this thin line between temptation and prohibition disappear completely.
"Let's get out of here." - His voice sounded almost like an order, but you knew it was not just a desire. It was a need. Your shared need for each other.
You nodded, and he immediately took your hand, intertwining your fingers. You left the hall quickly, without looking back. The night city greeted you with cool air, but a fire burned inside you.
Jungkook opened the car door for you, and you got in, feeling your heart pounding madly in your chest. He quickly walked around the car, got behind the wheel, and in a moment you were already pulling out of the parking lot.
"Where are we going?" - You asked, even though the answer wasn't that important. Jungkook gave you a dark, hot, intoxicating look.
"To my place." - He answered. Your heart literally threatens to jump out of your chest. The sensation of butterflies in your stomach excites you to incredible emotions. He puts his tattooed hand on your thigh, as if to claim you. You can feel your underwear getting wet in anticipation of what will happen at Jungkook's house.
"This is crazy." - You say, barely audible. Jungkook smiled.
"And you like it." - He said, still smiling. You wanted to deny it, but why would you, when it's really true.
Jungkook closes the door behind you, and you immediately find yourself pressed against the wall. His lips are so demanding, so powerful over yours. Your insides tremble because it's all so familiar to you. It feels like the six months of separation just didn't happen.
Your hot breath mingled with his as he pulled away from you to take a breath. He was looking at your face. Your eyes were slightly squinted, your lips swollen from kissing, your skin burning from his touch. You were as beautiful as the first night he fell in love with you.
"Are we really going to do this?" - You asked. Your voice broke into a whisper as he ran his fingertips down your neck, along your collarbone, and even lower to the neckline of your dress.
"Yes..." - He says hoarsely, between kisses on your neck. "I should stop, shouldn't I?" - He asks your opinion. You want to moan as he bites your skin and then runs his tongue over the spot.
"Jungkook..." - You breathe out. You don't know if you're begging him to continue or to stop. He stops kissing your neck. Your faces are separated by a few centimeters.
"Last chance to say no, my love." - He says. Fuck, he called you "love," he called you that because he loved you, does he still love you? You ran your fingers along his jaw, gently but firmly.
"Do you want me to say it?" - You ask with a challenge. Let him decide too, you are not the only one responsible for your actions. He squeezes your buttocks with his hands.
"No." - Jungkook says confidently. You smile seductively, giving him the green light. But he's in no hurry to continue what he's started. You know he's waiting for the words.
"Fuck me, love." - You ask. Jungkook's cock twitches in his boxers when he hears those words. Fuck. How can you say that so easily? He's going crazy. He throws himself on your lips, pressing his strong body against yours. His tongue enters your mouth with authority and finds yours. Six months. Six fucking months he wanted you back. He dreamed that you would be in his hands like this. And he made a promise to himself that if he could get you back, he would never let you go again.
Your underwear is getting wet. You are so excited that you think you will burn with passion. Jungkook's tongue seems to be punishing you for being away for so long. His hands are squeezing the meat on your buttocks with good pressure. He picks you up in his arms, and you only cry out softly, wrapping your arms around his neck.
Jungkook puts you down on the floor in his bedroom, interrupting your unrestrained kisses. He lightly touches your silk shoulder and runs his finger under the strap of your dress. He sees your erect nipples through the fabric of your dress. One movement and the shoulder strap is on falling down. He does the same with the other strap. He pulls down the silk and it slides over your figure.
As the dress falls to the floor, gathering at your feet, a picture he literally imagined when he saw it at the party flashes before his eyes.
His cock hardens even more, because your naked body is a frenzy. It's his weakness. That's what makes him commit sin.
He takes your tits in his hands and squeezes it. He feels that you are real. That he is not dreaming about you, as he has been for the last six months. He bends down and eagerly sucks on your erect nipple. Oh, it's a rosebud on his tongue. It tastes so sweet. Jungkook plays with your nipple with his tongue. When he sucks harder, you feel pain, pain that brings pleasure and sweet agony. Jungkook massages the other breast in his hand, and then smoothly moves to the other breast to savor it as well.
You throw your head back and enjoy his actions. You're addicted to the way he crosses the line.
Your pussy is throbbing and you're wetter than ever. You haven't had intimate relations since you broke up with Jungkook, so now you're just going crazy with every move.
Jungkook pulls away from your chest and smiles. Out of the corner of your eye, you see his hard cock sticking out of his pants.
He comes close and puts one arm around your waist. You watch him closely. He leans in and you think he's going to kiss you. You even close your eyes, but when nothing happens, you open them to check where he is. He's right there, and he's wearing a cheeky, sly smile.
"Let's see how wet my girl is." - He suggests. His hand goes into your panties, instantly finding your excited clit. He presses his fingers on it and you forget how to breathe.
"Fuck. Honey, is this waterfall for me?" - He asks you, and you can't answer him because you're losing your mind to his movements on your clit. You moan, loud and seductive. Jungkook can't help but kiss you. He covers your lips with his own and kisses you deeply, hotly, while building up your orgasm with his fingers.
You moan into his lips. Jungkook plunges two fingers into your passage and wants to curse. He forgot how tight it is in here. He's angry, thinking that someone else could be in that pussy besides him. So his movements and kisses become rougher.
The pressure he creates with his fingers excites you even more. You like it, but it's not enough because it's not his cock.
Jungkook gently lays you down on the bed, which is so familiar. It has witnessed your love so many times. Jungkook pulls down your thong. He looks at your pussy with great greed, the thong sliding down your slender legs. When your underwear is in his hand, he is in no hurry to throw it away. He touches the fabric with his nose, inhaling your scent.
"This is what my love smells like." - He says. You blush. This is so damn intimate. Jungkook throws your thong somewhere near your dress at floor. You watching him.
He's still as handsome as ever. A slim, toned body where every muscle is visible when it moves. You know so well what those muscles are to the touch. Only he seems to have new tattoos on his right arm. You notice that the eye that was below the elbow is gone, and now there is a green ink mark that says "bulletproof" instead. Oh yes, it's really about him.
"Did you have sex with anyone after me?" - Jungkook distracts you from looking at his tattoos. You raise one eyebrow. Why would he want to know in the middle of your lovemaking?
"Why do you ask?" - You don't answer, but ask your own question. Jungkook takes off his pants and throws them somewhere else.
"Answer me." - He says with authority. And this word sounds more like an order. You resent this. Why do you have to talk to him about it? You, for example, know without a doubt that he has definitely fucked some girls.
"Does it matter to you?" - You ask, not listening to his order. It matters to him. He was your first man, and the thought of anyone touching your body, which is unprecedentedly his, pisses him off.
Jungkook takes off his boxers. You can see his cock, hard and erect, hitting his thighs. You salivate at the sight of it. Jungkook's nude figure drives you crazy. You dream of him entering you and finally destroying you and all your desires not to be with him.
Jungkook approaches you dangerously.
He grabs your ankle and pulls you to the edge of the bed with a sharp movement. You scream, not expecting him to do this. He sits you down on the edge of the bed and leans in almost touching you. His lips are near yours and his breath burns your skin.
"Answer me when I ask you questions. Because when I want to know something, it's important to me. So, will you tell me? Did some dickhead touch my pussy? Or at least your tits, which also belong to me?" - He speaks low and commanding. His voice echoes in your head. How does he have such power over you? Why are you so excited by these words? You want to tease him more. You know it could be dangerous, but you've always been a gambler.
"What would you do if I told you that dickhead were?" - You ask. Your words have an immediate effect on Jungkook. His eyebrows raise and his eyes darken with rage. He lifts you up, pulling on your arm. It doesn't hurt, but it's sharp. He presses you down and you feel his erect cock resting against your pussy.
"So you're saying you were?" - He asks, but his voice isn't as hard as he looks. "You promised you'd be mine alone. My little slut. You wouldn't let anyone fuck your pussy. You're lying to me." - He says, smiling defiantly.
"I didn't lie. I asked you what you would do if I was like you and found a free cock? Huh?" - You ask with the same audacity. Jungkook squeezes your buttocks.
"I'd wipe him off the face of the earth." - He says casually. "Because he touched something that's mine."
"I'm not yours." - You say. But what are you saying? You are his. Every cell of that body belongs to him. You can't be with other men because you've never met anyone who can compare to him.
"Mine." - He argues with a wide smile on his lips. It makes you angry, even though you agree with him. "You're still mine... that's why you're here now. No one can touch you like I can, no one can love you like I can, no one can fuck you like I can, no one can keep your secrets like I can. I will give you all of this, and I will never let you go." - The lump in your throat prevents you from breathing normally.
You hold back the tears that threaten to fall down. Let these words be true. Let him keep his promise. Because you want to be with him. Jungkook breaks into you with a kiss to assure you of his words. Two lonely tears drops melt between your hot kiss. Jungkook pulls away and you breathe heavily into his lips. He wipes away the tear tracks with his thumbs.
"I haven't had anyone." - You confess, your voice desperate. "I couldn't even bear a strange man touching my body. So you are right. I couldn't be with anyone else." - Jungkook smiles with satisfaction. He knew that.
Jungkook sits on the edge of the bed and invites you to sit on his lap. You climb on top, holding onto his shoulders. Jungkook's cock lies between you, and you look hopefully between your bodies. Jungkook touches your chin with two fingers and lifts it, forcing you to look at him.
"I need to stretch you first, baby. You haven't had sex in a long time." - Jungkook says with pleasure in his voice. You nod your head in agreement.
Jungkook puts one hand on your hip and moves the other to your pussy. He dips one finger into the passage and moves the top down, creating some friction. You sigh blissfully, closing your eyes. After a while, he plunges his other finger in. The pressure increases and you moan softly. And when Jungkook plunges his third finger in, you feel a slight discomfort. It's only his fingers, when he puts his cock in it will hurt.
Jungkook has stretched you properly, and then he invites you to ride him.
"Give me a good ride." - He asks you. You smile and get up to sit on his attractive cock. Jungkook puts his cock’s head against your entrance and presses. You slowly lower yourself and when his tip plunges into your passage, you almost immediately feel pain. You scream out in pain and he stops, but not for long. He gives you a few seconds and then pushes down on your hips, lowering you. You're in pain, and you bite your lip to hold back your screams.
Finally you are filled with his cock to the brim. You feel it twitching inside you.
"Fuckin' shit." - Jungkook curses. He holds back as best he can. He really forgot how tight you are.
You sit like this for no more than half a minute. In the meantime, Jungkook has been working on your clit to get you used to its length. You squeeze his shoulders. He kisses you and you want to get down to the real business.
You start moving on his hips, lifting yours. The first movements are accompanied by pain. But after a while it feels good. You squirm on his lap and let out strangled moans. Jungkook helps you by supporting your hips and admires his beloved's face. It eloquently shows pleasure.
"How do you like riding my cock? Huh, baby? Did you miss it?" - Jungkook asks playfully. His voice breaks because you're riding his cock so well.
"Yeah..." - You answer in a long breath. It feels so good, it's pure ecstasy, it's euphoria. You're chasing an orgasm and he's taking you there.
"Let's make this reconciliation unforgettable." - Jungkook suggests. He takes over the initiative with his hands. He squeezes your thighs harder and pushes you deep and sharp. Your head is spinning from these movements. You bite your lips again, but Jungkook moves closer to you. "Don't hold back the moans I deserve." - He orders. You stop biting your lips, and now your loud moans fill the entire room.
Jungkook has found just the right spot. You feel like you're about to come. Your fingernails tear off the skin on his shoulders.
"Love..." - You call out to him. "I'm close."
Jungkook absorbs your expression with an absolutely lustful gaze. He speeds up his movements, but not so that he can come. He's definitely not done with you yet. You raise and lower your hips on Jungkook's lap to finally have the orgasm you've been waiting for.
When the knot in your lower abdomen is untied, you throw your head back and moan long and hard. Your velvety walls are squeezed by Jungkook's cock, and he jerks you upward to keep from cumming himself. You don't realize it right away. Only when you're on your knees, resting your pussy against Jungkook's abs, and you feel his hands on your buttocks.
"What a good girl. You have your first orgasm." - He counts.
Jungkook orders you to lie down on the pillows and spread your legs for him. He positions himself between your legs without sinking into you. He kisses you on the lips, filling your mouth with his tongue. Your tongues intertwine in a dance of love and passion. When you need air, Jungkook breaks the kiss. He goes down to your jaw, then your neck. He savored every inch of your skin, memorizing it again, as if he were discovering something long forgotten but painfully familiar.
He covered your body with kisses until he was in front of your pussy. The memory of his tongue on your clit makes you wet. Jungkook kisses your folds with a weightless kiss, and you're already trembling. He smiles out of the corner of his mouth.
"I forgot how sweet she is." - He comments. You lift your head to see him between your legs. He kisses the inside of your thighs, not wanting to leave an inch of skin on you that he hasn't kissed.
When he begins to lick your clit, making circular motions around your clit, you can't hold your head up. You fall back on the pillows. Your back arches unconsciously. Jungkook squeezes your buttocks and then sucks on your center. You moan again, and Jungkook thinks he'll never get tired of the sound. He's happy that he's the only one who hears these sounds.
You come on his tongue very quickly. Your swollen, excited clit didn't need much attention. You jerk on his tongue and Jungkook presses his tongue against your center to make sure you have your second orgasm of the night as long as possible.
You stop twitching and breathe heavily. Jungkook kneels down by your spread legs and you can see his beard glistening with your juice. He wipes his chin with his hand and comes closer to you.
"Is my baby satisfied?" - He asks. You are almost unable to speak. You smile and barely speak.
"It was just as fucking gorgeous as ever.” - Jungkook laughs heartily, and once again wants to kiss you. You taste your cum on his tongue. His kisses become slower, deeper.
"I've been waiting for this for so long..." - His voice was quiet, almost hoarse, when he broke away from your lips. You, too, had secretly dreamed that you would have the opportunity to be together again. And who knows how it all will worked out.
Jungkook plunged into you again. His cock entered you painlessly this time. You couldn't get enough, because this is what you will always need. You bent to meet his touch, feeling your bodies merging in a single rhythm.
Every movement was slow, as if he wanted to prolong this moment as long as possible.
Jungkook knew every curve of your body, every weakness that made you sigh and tremble. But this time it was different. Deeper. Stronger. It wasn't just desire. It was something more.
Your fingers tangled in his hair as your lips found each other again. He was everything to you that night - a fire that burned from the inside out, and a sea that enveloped you in its waves.
He took his time.
You didn't want it to end.
Your breaths mingle, hot and uneven, as his movements become stronger. He feels a wave of some new emotions, as if he is rediscovering a familiar body.
"You have no idea how much I..." - Jungkook stops, his lips barely touching yours. You open your eyes and stare into his handsome face. You notice beads of sweat on his face and a few loose strands of hair.
"How much what?" - Your voice sounds almost hoarse, and he smiles because he knows you're on the verge.
"How much I missed you." - He finally whispers. You don't have time to say anything because Jungkook is pushing you. You lie in his arms. Your legs are intertwined around his waist. He is deep inside you and this is the best moment of the whole year.
His movements are slow and deep at first, but with each new one he speeds up. He fucks you like never before, and you close your eyes, enjoying the sensation. You feel another orgasm coming over you. Jungkook's hips thrust fast and you choke on the sweetest orgasm of the night.
Jungkook comes after you, filling you to the brim with cum. He jerks inside you for a while and stops only when he releases himself with a whimper.
He collapses into the crook of your neck and you both breathe heavily. You wrap your arms around his broad shoulders. His heavy breathing mingles with yours, and your heart hasn't yet returned to its normal rhythm. Your throat is dry, and you urgently need water.
Jungkook finally stands up and smiles at you with satisfaction. You reflexively do the same.
"You... water?" - Your voice breaks, and you're almost ashamed of how weak it sounds. Jungkook smiles slightly, realizing that you're asking him for water.
"Just a moment, my love." - He says and pecking on your lips. He gently pulls out of you. You try to sit up and cover yourself with the blanket you had sex on.
Jungkook puts on his boxers, finds a bottle of water on the table, unscrews the cap, and hands it to you. You take a few sips, trying to come to your senses. Jungkook sits down next to you, rests his hands on the bed on either side of your hips, and looks you straight in the eye.
"I don't want to let you go anymore." - He says clearly. You freeze.
"Jungkook..." - You want to say something, but you find yourself unceremoniously interrupted by him.
"I'm serious." - He interrupts. "I was an idiot for letting you leave back then. I thought it was for the best, that you and I would destroy each other if we stayed together. But you know what? It was even worse without you."
You look at him, feeling something hot squeezing your chest.
"I don't know if..." - If we should start again. You want to say. But he interrupts you again. The conversations during sex were frank, but now that you're back to reality, things are just as complicated as they were.
"I know." - His large hands gently wrap around yours. "And I'm going to do everything I can to make up for my mistakes. I don't want just one night, Y/N. I want everything. I want you. I want our future."
You see the sincerity in his dark eyes, and it almost scares you. You're afraid, even though you really want to start over.
"What if it doesn't work out again?" - You share your worries.
"I will make it work. Every day. Every time you doubt, I'll prove to you that I love you more than ever." - He leans in slowly, giving you a chance to stop him. But you don't. Your lips meet again, and this time the kiss is not so hot, not so hasty. It's deeper, more tender.
Like a hope.
Like a promise.
"Let's try again." - You agree. You look into his eyes, reading everything he didn't say out loud: fear, hope, devotion. Jungkook has never been a man to give up easily, and now he was proving it again.
Your fingers involuntarily squeeze his hand, as if checking to see if he is real, if this moment is real.
"Do you promise we will?"
He leans in even closer, his forehead touching yours.
"I promise." - He whispers. And this time you believe him.
Like the northern lights that appear only at certain moments, your feelings had their peaks and troughs, but they were always on the horizon. You could get lost in each other, disappear, losing light, but you came back, blooming with new colors.
Because your love is like the sky itself. Eternal. Unpredictable. And worth waiting for.
#jungkook x reader#ex to lovers#bts#bts jungkook#jungkook#jungkook x f!reader#jungkook smut#jungkook imagine#bts fanfction#jungkook fanfic#jungkook x you#jungkook fic#jungkook jeon#bts au
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Hello there baby, are your parents bakers? Cause you're a cutie pie lol sorry couldn't resist the urge to flirt with my favorite writer💕How have you been? How was your day? I wish you a wonderful day and a lovely night💕
It's my first time here sending an ask but lately I've been thinking about shy!Spencer x flirty!reader, I just think is such a cute couple.
So if you're taking requests, I was thinking about early seasons Spencer completely falling for the reader and the way she's so flirty but sweet and kind, the way he'd be blushing hard at anything she says and how he'd like the way she's always touching him cause he felt cherised and desired.
It could be fluff or smut or both cause I can picture them going slow with the relationship but Spencer being eager to please her and show how much he loves everything about her.
You said about choosing a emoji, so can I be the 🐇anon?
A/N: Thanks for the request! Shy Spencer is the best because he's so dumb and silly and doesn't realize when people are attracted to him. I've said it before, but he's basically every nerdy main character in 00s romcoms that are "unattractive" because they wear glasses. I hope you enjoy the fic~♡
Warnings: mentions of case details, slight spoilers for upto s5
With a degree in law and a deep-rooted hatred of businessmen, you'd certainly found your calling in one of the FBI White Collar divisions. Putting away the sleazy bastards was easily one of the biggest perks of the job, but every coin had a second side, and yours was you actually had to interact with the cretins before you could take them down.
You'd dealt with bribes, dinner invites, and sexual propositions more than a time or two, and had to remind yourself that kicking anyone of them clean in the balls was most likely a firing offense, if not legally off the table.
The man in the case you were currently working - possibly Bill Hodges, possibly Daniel Brady, possibly so many more men - had been a typical white collar freak until he'd moved on to murder. And when you'd been so close to nailing his ass for fraud, too.
You'd had no choice but to call in whatever unit it was that actually got to put bullets in the bastards, sure that you were going to be strong-armed out of months of work for the glory of taking down a spree killer.
Instead, you got Spencer Reid, delivered freshly to your desk like a lamb to slaughter.
“Sorry, you're the agent from the BAU?” You asked, raking your eyes across his body, smiling at his obvious discomfort with the attention.
“Yes, Doctor Reid. I'm here for more information on the Hodges files.”
You dusted your skirt off as you stood, moving around the desk to grab the file. You held it out to him but pulled it back when he reached for it.
“I'm sorry, you're really in the BAU?” An embarrassed look fell across his face, and you instantly felt shitty.
“Do you want to see my credentials?”
“No, I'm sorry, it's just - I wasn't expecting someone so…pretty?”
The embarrassed look deepened to a flush, and you brightened at the sight. You weren't lying. He really was pretty, and you hoped your comment hadn't come off as patronizing.
“You're adorable. Here's the file, I’ll be at your team briefing in half an hour. Spencer, right?”
He nodded, finally waking up and taking the files as you pushed it against his chest, using the movement to step slightly closer.
“I'll see you later then,” you trailed your look down, getting a good look at all of him before meeting his eyes again. “Save me a seat?”
“I should… I'll, uh, go now. Thanks for the-” he stammered, pointing to the file, backing out of your space slowly, like an animal trying not to show its back to a predator.
Unlike the long line of scumbags filling the halls and case files of your floor, Spencer was without bravado or ego. His lack of both meant that you were interested. You were very interested.
Half an hour later, you practically sprinted to the 6th floor, bouncing up the stairs to the office where you'd take your meeting like a giddy school girl.
“Hello, sorry, I'm not late, am I?” You asked, quietly opening the door and letting yourself in.
“Agent Y/N, no, perfect timing, Penelope was just about to brief us on your case,” Hotch said, rising and giving your hand a firm shake. He looked around to find a seat to usher you into, but you quickly dropped yourself into the seat right beside Spencer Reid, grin deepening as he flushed and offered you an awkward yet endearing smile.
Unconsciously, you shifted closer, shooting him your own smile before the meeting officially began, and you were forced to keep a straight, serious face.
The entire case progressed in much the same way, with you doing everything you could to fluster Spencer Reid and him doing everything in his power to convince himself you were being friendly.
“Spencer, do you have a phone number?” You asked after slipping out of the meeting, trailing him back to his desk.
“Yeah, we have to keep connected for cases, so I have a phone.”
“Great. Your number - what is it?”
He rattled off the digital as you scribbled them down on a notepad.
“And Hotch's number is-”
“Oh, I won't need that. Thanks, Spencer.” You said waving as you left to slink back to your desk. You could hear him calling out behind you, confused.
“Y/N… Y/N, we split up on cases often, if there's an incident and you need to contact us it's better to have all of the team members numbers,” he panted, jogging to catch up with your focused pace.
“If I need to contact you, I'll take myself to Agent Garcia’s office and use her direct line,” you said, finally stopping yourself at the elevator and pressing the button.
He caught up, and stopped abruptly next to you.
“Oh… oh, yeah that's… that's efficient.”
You stepped onto the elevator when it arrived, leaving Spencer hesitating whether or not to climb in himself, desperately wondering why you'd ask for his number then.
“Goodbye, Doctor Reid,” you said, pressing the door close button and blowing him a kiss just before the doors blocked you from sight.
To tell the truth, you'd had a lot of fun flirting with Spencer on the phone from Penelope’s office during the case. The woman was an inspiration, even if her flirting had a completely different purpose and meaning than your own. Her friendship with Derek Morgan was admirable, but you didn't want to be friends with Spencer Reid.
“Hello, handsome, what can I do for you today?” You asked, picking up the phone and basking in the stammers that answered you down the line.
“D-Do you need me to get Morgan for you?” He said, his voice treading lightly.
“Unless Derek Morgan has, overnight, managed to turn into a 6’1 Doctor with a penchant for cardigans and leather satchels and an IQ of 187, then I am absolutely not looking for him. I have case details.”
He brushed past your comment, but he kept the slight stammer through the conversation, right until you signed off.
“Until next time, sexy.”
“Um, yeah… thanks…beautiful?” he signed off, and you guffawed in laughter even as Penelope stared wide-eyed in your direction, not believing her ears.
“Please forgive our little test tube genius. We forgot to add flirting skills to his childhood curriculum, and now, alas, the poor thing doesn't know a damn thing.”
He'd called back a few hours later, and you'd purred more compliments down the line, but this time with the team surrounding him as they closed in on your unsub.
“Hello, this is beautiful speaking. How may I help you?” You giggled down the line, picking up the call after only a single ring.
“Y/N,” he breathed, catching his breath awkwardly as he struggled to remember why it was you were needed.
“So… um, like… Hotch has a question about the files you sent earlier. He needs Penelope to… do something as well.”
You could almost see the awkward nod through the phone.
“Great. Pass me over to Hotch, then, hot stuff.”
You heard the tell-tale sound of Derek Morgan’s cackle in the background, and you couldn't help but let another giggle slip out. You were a gonner, and, hopefully, so was he.
The case wrapped quickly after that, spree killing being a quick game of cat and mouse out of necessity. You weren't happy with three bodies, but it sure as hell was preferable to more.
You greeted the BAU team at the jet hanger as they returned, reclaiming your fraud files for paperwork and using that simple chore as a reason to get close to Spencer again.
“Good work out there, Doctor Reid.”
“What, he's not hot stuff anymore now he's in front of you?” Emily Prentiss laughed, throwing her go bag onto her shoulder and trailing behind where you'd started strolling alongside Spencer.
“Oh, he's still hot stuff. He's just hot stuff with three PhDs that just stopped a spree killer,” you said, sighing dreamily. “How do you do it?”
“We were all there too, you know,” the other woman chuckled as you made it inside the building and to the elevator.
“Yeah, well,” you said, taking a second to reach out and straighten out Spencer's skewed tie, smoothing his jacket and generally just touching him in whatever way you could, respectfully.
You didn't even bother to finish your sentence, just leaning closer to his ears and whispering directly into them.
“You're very cute when you're flustered, Doctor Reid.”
You stepped away for a second while the rest of his team teased him, stepping to the back of the elevator to ascend to your floor while the others departed on theirs.
They filed out one by one and you sent them off with a smile and a wave, signing in defeat as you realized there was no longer a reason for you to interact with the good doctor ever again.
If you weren't so stupidly aware of him, you'd almost have missed the fact that Spencer didn't leave the elevator when his teammates did. He instead turned to you and, with the brightest red you'd seen on his face to date, stammered out half a sentence.
“I.. Y/N, I was just… curious, if you, by any chance…”
Your eyes widened in joy as you anticipated his question, silently begging him just to spit it out.
“I was wondering, i-if you had… a boyfriend?” By the end of his sentence, even he seemed unsure of whether that was a question he should really be asking.
You'd been throwing heart eyes at him for says, and he was asking if you were in a committed relationship.
“No,” you said slightly breathily, as if your body were trying to expel all the anticipation it had stupidly built up. “No, I don't have a boyfriend, Spencer.”
“Great okay,” he smiled, a boyish grin if you'd ever seen one, before backtracking quickly.
“Well not great for you, great for me. Not that you can't be happy alone, I don't know how you feel about…romantic entanglements and I-I-I’m not saying that your life isn't,” he searched for the words with his hands, as of he could grasp them as a life line while he was sinking fast. “-Great without a boyfriend or anything like that, I'm just - really - pleased that position is currently… vacant?”
“Spencer?” You said, feeling like a cat who got the cream as a smile twitched at your lips, pulling the corners up as you listened to him ramble.
“Yes?”
“Do you want to be my boyfriend or are you asking for a friend?”
You'd meant the words as a joke but he stood contemplating for a second. You pushed a hand against your mouth to suppress the childish squeal from popping out.
“It would be a bit presumptuous to shoot straight for boyfriend, right? How about date ....partner?”
You couldn't stop yourself from closing in on him then, practically cornering him in the elevator as the floors passed you by.
“Presumptuous would be thinking I could have a boyfriend when I've been begging you to stick your tongue down my throat with my eyes for the last half hour. I thought they taught you body language at the BAU?”
“They teach us how to catch criminals, not how to see when someone is giving us…fuck me eyes, Y/N.” The curse left you a little dizzy - this was it, this was what you'd been trying to do all week, to get under his skin and get him to let his guard down so you could capture him.
“Doctor Reid, I'm a little scandalized! I didn't know you swore. What a dirty mouth you have.” You reached up with both hands, letting your thumb on his lips before pretending to wipe something away at the corner of his mouth. You were in the perfect position to notice his throat bob as he swallowed.
The elevator pinged at your floor, and you left him behind you with one last swipe of your fingers at his chin. You weren't expecting him to follow, but he did.
“Y/N…please, Y/N…. Can we just…?” You relished the awkwardness in his voice as he trailed you again, a satisfied smile settling onto your face.
You just kept walking. Or you did until you felt a large hand wrap around your wrist and pull you sideways into the nearest storage cupboard.
You gasped as he pinned you to the wall, close not, but his eyes still hesitant on what to do next.
“Spen-” He cut you off with his lips on yours, silencing you before you could get the final word. His lips were clumsy at first, but you felt hot under his touch arching yourself up into him. His tongue pushed into your mouth as he found his stride, your hands tangling in his hair as you held on for dear life.
This was it. This was what you'd been waiting for.
Reluctantly, he pulled away, both of you gasping for breath to fill your suddenly empty lungs.
“Was that….what… you wanted?” He panted, resting his head on yours.
There were no words. It was what you wanted but now you wanted more, needed more. You settled for a quick nod as your tongue flamed, unable to say anything helpful.
“Good. Great…” he removed his hands from you and scratched at the back of his neck, putting a more respectful distance between the two of you as he cleared his throat.
“I'll just-” he pointed to the door and started making his way out. You sighed again, watching him walk away down the hall, his hair a mess, his tie askew, and a whole lot of your lipstick staining his lips.
Surely, he'd notice by the time anyone else did. If not, you'd just effectively staked your claim on Doctor Spencer Reid, and you couldn't be happier about it.
#spencer reid#criminal minds#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fanfic#mgg#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds fandom#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fandom#spencer reid x reader fluff#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x self insert#🐇 anon
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Hi OTNF and everyone,
I am finding that it's harder and harder and harder to get into anything - book, show, movie... most things seem, you know, to just not be doing it for me, be it fanfic or original stuff.
In part, I think, it's a general restlessness and that it's become harder to give anything enough time to get into the stories, the characters, the settings, the narrative voices... I guess you can call it attention deficit on my part, just a need for stories to deliver those sweet, sweet hits quickly, but they're not.
I'm not currently ficcing but I did for years (might again in the future, who knows), and it's made reading, specifically, harder. It's like I've become more aware of what goes on behind the scene, I guess? I feel like I can see the writer giving up on a sentence, skipping a scene because fuck this, trying hard to not repeat a word although it's the only one that fits, etc.
Or maybe it's just the *everything* around us in the world that is weighing on me too much? I could say it's adult life, but then again I have more free time than most (and boy do I need hours of doing nothing to survive the other hours), and no family/partner (all that would put even more pressure on me): what is wrong, to make everything so UGHHH?
I feel like I'm stuck in a rut with a brain moaning feed me, feeeed me, and whatever I try to give it, it spits everything out. (Yes, I've tried hobbies, and nothing sticks there either. I've never really found rewards or satisfaction there, so...)
Decades ago as a kid, I was a voracious reader, although studying literature took the pleasure of it away from me. It took time and discovering fanfic that brought me back to reading, but at the time the internet was starting to be a thing, too, and it can't have helped the attention thing. AFAIK I'm not ADHD but then again, I couldn't get a proper diagnosis (the therapists I saw were either dismissive or just about The Talking, which was pointless for me).
I just wonder how it all disappeared, you know? Sometimes I find something that catches my attention for a while - a book (but I read quite quickly when motivated), a fandom... but it's been a while now, and it's just so frustrating! When is it going to come back? Will it ever? *gulp*
I know that books were escapism when I was a child, and then fandom was escapism, but at the moment I find myself grabbing at air and my empty hands are mocking me. Give me my escapism baaaaack!
So, uh. Anyone here with me?
--
Yes.
I felt like that during part of lockdown. Anhedonia is common in those kinds of circumstances.
Getting your mojo back is certainly possible, but you may need to go see a professional about depression and have some chemical assistance (yes, even if you don't feel sad per se), or you may need to change your lifestyle to one that doesn't have the thing causing you to need eleventy billion hours of downtime.
Aside from serious interventions like that, you can consider a social media detox. Remove every source of doomscrolling and time wasting of that type. When the attention span is zero and nothing brings joy, the tiny and useless hits from finishing a game of solitaire or seeing one more instagram post become very attractive. This is a trap. It will suck what little energy and joy you have and make your muscles flabby for the work of getting into an in-depth book/hobby/experience.
I know the feeling of being able to see how the sausage is made, but... well... first, being in a better mental state will make that matter less, and second, reading prose that is more competent will make that less of an issue. A lot of mainstream tradpub genre fiction is not, in my opinion, very well written these days. Obviously, people are still enjoying it, and that's fine, but if you're noticing writers fumbling around, it might be time to check out some literary fiction or some other category known more for prose quality than anything else.
It's also important to have some structure and some things to look forward to. Even if you feel tired, overwhelmed, and busy, sometimes, the answer is to do more... But it must be things that are distinct and significant and that get you off of the couch, like going to one museum every weekend.
I saw some advice once about this kind of thing that phrased it as "One big adventure; one small adventure."
Every week, you should have those two things to look forward to that matter. Check out a new coffee shop. That could be the small one. Go to an event: a gallery opening, a concert, whatever.
Physical exercise and doing some things that aren't as verbal and conscious thought-involving is important too. Painting is a better hobby for zoning out than writing is. Taking long walks in nature is good for most people.
--
The kind of intense, obsessive love I had for reading as a child and that I sometimes have for fandom requires a lot of attention and some time. It's escapist, but that masks how much work it actually was. It didn't feel like work only because we were in training.
If you've filled your brain and your day up with a thousand petty annoyances or minor and useless attempts to feel something, you won't have the capacity for those deeper things.
Because you are already at a point that's equivalent to a bad sprained ankle, trying to get back to running right now won't work. You have to stay off of the ankle for a bit, then build your strength and stamina back up.
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I loved your recent Alhaitham fic! I was wondering if you would consider writing a pt. 2 where Alhaitham regrets how he treated you and attempts to win you back (maybe 4ggravate finds out and attempts to help Alhaitham to win you back)? I understand if not. Thank you for sharing your writing!
Thank you so much for liking my first fic! Feel free to request anything genshin-related and I’ll try my best to provide!
You kept me like a secret, but I kept you like an oath (pt. 2)
It was rare, I was there
Here’s part 1!
Synopsis: despite the neglect and everything that happened, you both still longed for each other…
Content: Alhaitham x fem!reader, wingmen!4ggravate, implied Dehyarzad, Collei, absent Cyno, Tighnari, second chances, writer!reader, angst to comfort, reader is with someone else
Warnings: slight cursing, long intro again (I can’t help it), mild spoilers for Sumeru archon quest chapter 3 act 2, Collei goes missing
Note: this part can be optional for you. If you prefer to end it at part one, then feel free to do so! But, if you’re a sucker for second chances (like me), then consider this a treat from me to you!
—
Nothing. You could hear nothing.
Not your heart pounding to the rhythm of your feet. Not the screaming in your head as you spotted familiar grey hair walking around the city. Your thoughts immediately tasted bitter—if he had the time to walk now, how come he hadn’t back then?
You surmise that you weren’t worth the step.
The weight of his absence hung over you like a storm cloud, casting a shadow over the warmth of the day. Despite your efforts to push the pain aside, it crept back, heavy and suffocating. Your mother's words echoed in your mind like a haunting refrain, a reminder that perhaps you had been foolish to invest so much in someone who couldn't reciprocate your love.
The shops were as busy and ever; merchant services, inquiries about products, scholars out in the open. You were out for groceries, almost ashamed for showing your face after the scene you caused 15 days ago. The world needed to know you were strong, though, so you put a big smile on your face and a new perfume worth Alhaitham’s salary. You even reached out to Cyno about the book you mentioned; so far, everything has been accurate, according to him.
“Y/N?” A familiar voice called to you. Turning your head in that direction, you see Dehya in the distance waving at you. Once you’ve said hello, she looked at you with a smirk on her face, “Wow, did a flower barf on you? You look radiant!”
“Radiant?” You humble yourself, “I don’t remember putting on any jewelry.”
“No, silly!” She gestured to your everything, “There’s this aura you’re emitting and it’s making you glow!” Glow? All you did these past few days was cry, eat, and write. Perhaps it was the tears that helped. They irritated your eyes so much it gave you a softer, more approachable look. “Do you think you could lend me some of that eyeshadow?”
Try crying every hour, Dehya. “Ah, I just did a favor for a friend studying cosmetology. I’m not entirely sure what products they used,” you lie. Thinking about Alhaitham will certainly eat you alive; you change the subject despite the flattery you enjoyed. “What brings you to the city?”
Enthusiasm spouts from the mercenary, “My lady Dunyarzad invited me over for the Sabzeruz Festival; and you know me, I gotta be there for my lady!”
You found it adorable—almost enviable—how they still keep in touch even after Dehya’s resignation. Call a spade a spade, that is real commitment. It makes you wonder if you’d be here, ‘radiant’ and ‘glowing,’ if you were treated that way.
“The Sabzeruz Festival? I didn’t realize it was so close. Wow, time surely flies.” Suddenly, you feel excitement rush through your veins, a new experience after days of steady tides.
“Couldn’t agree more,” said Dehya. From a distance, you both heard Dunyarzad call her name. “Ah, it looks like she needs me back there. I better go check on her. If you want, you should totally come over the bazaar once the festival is ready. Dunyarzad and I would be lucky to have you celebrate with us!” After you gave an accepting nod and farewell, Dehya ran off to the woman in purple, practically skipping on her feet.
As you watched their lively interaction, a surge of envy and longing swept through you. Their easy camaraderie and genuine happiness a stark contrast to the emptiness and loneliness gnawing at your insides. You had longed to experience that kind of connection, to be enveloped in the warmth of love and companionship once more. But deep down, you knew it was a distant dream, a fantasy you could never reclaim.
You weren’t a religious person, but out of sheer desperation, you prayed.
Lesser Lord Kusanali, please free me from this torment. Let the flowers in my garden bloom of life, let the fruits grow ripe even without much sun, let the trees reach the highest of buildings.
—
Simple greetings and little nods, Alhaitham wouldn’t have minded if those scholars were you. In fact, instead of returning those nods and hellos, he would embrace you, lift your feet off the ground and spin you around like you always wanted.
After you stormed out the tavern, Cyno went ahead and asked what happened to the both of you. For the first time, he couldn’t give a straight answer. Every excuse seemed to damage your image, and that was the last thing he wanted. Kaveh ended up taking over to save him the embarrassment.
The 15 days he burned for you were like falling into the abyss, fighting every day to the brink of death, unable to eat the sustenance that came from your warmth.
The now Scribe Alhaitham needed something to keep you off his mind. He considered attending a meeting, but none seemed to pique his interest. Every thought ended up on your doorstep, making him think of dropping by. “Kaveh,” he called the architect scribbling on his notebook, “have you seen Y/N, as of late?”
“No, she hasn’t been feeling well these past few weeks. Shouldn’t you be in a meeting?”
“Shouldn’t you be paying rent?”
Kaveh cursed at Alhaitham, “I’m trying to make the money, goddamit!”
“Maybe you would have the money if you stopped settling for your clients’ low budgets.”
“Is it hard to find me considerate?”
“I’d rather call it pathetic.”
“Go catch whatever Y/N has,” he shooed Alhaitham away, “maybe that would give you some perspective.”
The scribe stood silent for a few seconds. He knew his roommate was right, he should’ve thought about how you felt before anything. Kaveh was about to believe he had won a squabble for once, but then he suddenly revealed, “Y/N… is angry at me.”
Kaveh pshawed at him, “With the way you talked to her? No shit.” Alhaitham didn’t move an inch. “Hey, what happened there, anyway? It wasn’t like Y/N to burst out to you like that. Are you hiding something?”
With a sigh, the grey-haired man decided to reveal everything to his roommate. He listened intently, gasping and scolding him for his lack of attention towards you, adding salt to his open wounds. Upon recalling the words the scribe had said, Kaveh took a slight breath, “You fucked up.”
“I know.”
“You need to go fix this.”
“I know.”
“And you were calling me pathetic!”
“I know! I just-“ he couldn’t believe he was saying this. “I need help.”
As he was popularly known, Alhaitham wasn’t one to ask for help. Not because he had too much pride, but because he knew how to solve things like the back of his hand. He had access to numerous files from the Akasha, and he had connections to powerful people, being the scribe and all.
But this was a different situation. Every solution did not guarantee a 100% success rate, 87% at best, and that was not enough for Alhaitham. He was ready to do anything for you, to get on his knees and raise you to the highest regard, to even beg.
“I could ask Tighnari,” Kaveh began, “The Sabzeruz Festival is coming soon, maybe you could ask her out?”
Right, now that he’s perceived as a hero of his nation, he is expected to attend these festivals. He never bothered to come before, and he wouldn’t now, but he was willing to if it meant getting to see you again. “I don’t think she’ll be accepting me as her date.”
“Then we’ll talk to her.”
“Will she be willing to listen? Wait, isn’t she sick?”
Kaveh sighed, downhearted, “Right.” Then he clicked his fingers at the scribe, “I have an idea!”
—
“Collei? What are you doing here,” you said after opening your door. She drew a small grin with worried eyes, holding a box of goods for you. It’s been a while since you saw her, she grew up well, taller since your last meeting.
“Hello, miss Y/N! I heard from Master Tighnari that you weren’t feeling well,” yes, you distinctly remember lying to them (Tighnari, and Kaveh) so they wouldn’t see you as often. “So I thought I could bring you simple remedies.” The little girl observed you. “But now I think there’s no need for that,” she chuckled.
“Ah, yeah, don’t worry, it was just a small cold. Speaking of Tighnari, how come he isn’t here with you?” You ushered her in and sat her down for some tea, placing her box of medicines on the counter.
“He had some business to attend to with a merchant and allowed me to visit you. It’s been a while since you’ve travelled to Gandharva Ville, miss Y/N, do you have any plans on visiting?”
“Yes, I’m thinking of basing the rainforest as the main setting for my new book, actually.”
You both chatted about everything you could as you waited for the water to boil. Afterwards, you served a hot teapot, dwelling in mint and lotus herbs. “Ah, Collei, how long are you and Tighnari staying in the city?”
“Just for three days, though I would like to stay until after the Sabzeruz Festival,” she chuckles, holding her now warm cup in her hands.
“You could come with me if Tighnari would allow it.”
The little girl’s eyes beamed with stars, “Really? Oh, I’ve been dreaming of going to one for ages! Miss Nilou will be performing, right?” You nod to her delight, “Yes! Archons, I really hope Master would let me.”
As if he heard his name, Tighnari knocked on your door. Opening it, he looked glad seeing your healthy state. “Y/N! Good to see you’re feeling well now.” He peaked behind you to see Collei sip from her cup.
Upon recognizing her master, Collei got up and greeted him. “Hi, Master! Miss Y/N and I were just talking about the Sabzeruz Festival, and that I could come with her to see Miss Nilou perform!” Her enthusiasm was as contagious as a cold, you couldn’t help but laugh.
“As long as it wouldn’t be a hassle for Y/N, and that you would always be careful when purchasing products,” Tighnari worries like a mother. “Always look at the expiration dates, check if there are anything you’re allergic to.”
He goes on and on for about 5 minutes until you cut him off, “Alright, alright, Tighnari, it’s not like she’ll be going all alone; she has me with her!”
With this, Collei wrapped her arms around your waist, ever so thankful for your support. You thought of her as a niece, and she thought of you as an auntie, willing to give her advice on anything, trivial or not. After a few more words exchanged, and details for the festival, the pair decide to head to their cottage.
For once, you enjoyed your time and not think of Alhaitham once!
Oops.
—
It was the day of the Sabzeruz Festival; you had already picked Collei up from their cottage and are on your way to the Grand Bazaar. You could see thousands of attendees, travelling merchants, and familiar faces on the way.
As the vibrant colors and lights of the festival unfolded before you, the once a source of excitement and anticipation now loomed before you like a daunting reminder of what you had done. Despite Dehya's invitation, you couldn't shake the feeling of being an outsider, a solitary figure adrift in a sea of joyous revelry. Each smile, each laugh felt like a dagger to your already wounded heart, a painful reminder of the love you had lost and the embarrassment that now consumed you.
But this was no time for dwelling upon the memories that brought misery, remember, Collei is counting on you to give her a good time.
“Y/N, Collei!” You spot Kaveh in the distance waving and walking your way. Collei happily waved back. “I’m so glad I could run into you guys, you have no idea how terrified I am of meeting a client by accident.”
You laughed, “Do I have to accompany you, too, Kaveh?”
“Actually, I was thinking of letting you have some fun while I take care of little Collei here.” He ruffles her neatly-done hair, now messy but more natural-looking. This led Collei to bring out a small comb to fix it.
You felt irresponsible leaving Collei in someone else’s care, you’d said you would take care of her, and it felt like you would be breaking a promise if you agreed to his offer. You tuck your hair behind your ear, “I don’t know, Kaveh, something feels wrong about that, no offense. Plus, if something were to happen to Collei, we wouldn’t hear the end of it; you wouldn’t like Tighnari when he’s angry.”
“A fair point, but you’ve been locked up in your house for two weeks, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind. You deserve to be out there, butterfly, spread the wings you grew from being in that cocoon!”
That somehow felt too specific. Does he know something? Collei starts to agree, despite seeming so excited to go with you. “Even you, Collei?” You sigh, “Fine, but if something happens, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
You weren’t expecting to have so much fun here. The lights, the music, even the people were a blast! At first you were anxious for Collei, checking in from time to time, then as you continued to do so, your vists would be more spaced apart. You drank some punch with Dehya and Dunyarzad, who seemed to be doing really well for themselves, then you danced with the crowd in the name of Lesser Lord Kusanali.
After all of that, it was time for one last dance before Nilou’s grand performance. The band began to play a soft, romantic folk song. “Alright, Sumeru City,” called the lead singer, their voice sonorous with seduction, “before we settle down for the reknowned Nilou, let’s have a little treat for all the couples out there. So, grab your partner and dance along.”
Just as you were at the height of excitement, everything seemed to come crashing down again. You stood on the sidelines, feeling lost and out of place. Dehya and Dunyarzad swayed together, hand in hand. A lot of other couples came together and danced. The passion embedded in the song they sang only made you feel more alone, the walls of the Grand Bazaar growing taller and taller as you gazed upon them in longing.
You felt a hand on your shoulder, a man you don’t remember meeting. “Excuse me, miss, could I trouble you with a dance?” He looked about your age, a nice smile and an energetic demeanor. You were cautious of his intentions, though. It’s possible to have fun while maintaining a distance, right?
You accepted his invitation, all of the sudden you felt a sick knot in your stomach, like you were cheating on Alhaitham. But you weren’t together anymore, why would you stop yourself from meeting new people?
The man said his name was Hafan, a mercenary from the Corps of Thirty. He offered to buy you a drink once the dance was over, and again, you gladly accepted while the sweat in your palms said otherwise. You talked with every step you took, getting to know each other and telling stories. He made you laugh—a lot—and you impressed him with your witty comebacks. Perhaps this was the Dendro Archon’s response to your prayer? A hand to guide you through the maze, and to help you believe in love again?
But just amidst the merry atmosphere of the festival, a lingering anxiousness settled within your stomach.
Then, you saw him.
Alhaitham stood in the corner of the room, the desperate merchants and harmonizing of the band seemed to die down as time stood still. The vibrant colors faded into shades of grey as your heart clenched with a mixture of dread and longing.
It was as if a gate had opened within you, unleashing a torrent of emotions you had struggled to contain. Guilt gnawed at your conscience, regret tore your chest open, and love gave your heart to him.
As Hafan twirled you gracefully across the makeshift floor, you held your gaze with Alhaitham, your heart torn between the past and the present, between what was and what could’ve been.
Maybe you had been thinking too rashly, maybe he had changed over the course of your absence. The way he looked at you with such burning could not make you think otherwise.
In that moment, with all the crowds in the festival and the ache of your fractured heart, you knew for certain—no matter how hard you deny it, no matter how fast you tried to run, you could never escape the grasp he had on your soul.
The dance had ended, though it felt like it just started. Before Hafan could get that drink he promised, you said, “I’m sorry, Hafan.” He looked at you in confusion. “You must be looking for someone to—I don’t know—spend the rest of the festival with, and I don’t think I can fulfill that position. You’re a sweet guy, truly, I’m just not in a good place for anything right now.” Archons, you sounded ridiculous. But to your suprise, the man hardly took it personally.
“It’s okay, I get it. I had fun with you tonight, Y/N. You’re a great person to be around.” You almost regret having to end your time with him. “I’ll see you around, yeah?” He gave you a nod of farewell and left your side.
You looked in the direction of Alhaitham, again, hoping to catch that feeling of familiarity, but you had found he was no longer there. Perhaps it was your imagination.
You then searched for Collei and Kaveh, but they were nowhere to be found. They weren’t near the stalls, or in front of the stage.
They were nowhere in the bazaar.
The panic you felt shook your entire foundation, the pillars that kept you from going back home, back to the pain.
What if they had been kidnapped? You trusted Kaveh’s words, that he would take care of her, but for all you know they could be in the middle of the desert right now! What if Kaveh had run into a client and got distracted? What if Collei got injured or hospitalized?
Your heart began beating in your ears, your breath hastened with every thump. The air seemed so thin in the enclosed space, you needed to go outside. Yes, perhaps you could have a better chance at finding them out there, too.
As you walked out the doors of the Grand Bazaar, Collei’s name immediately echoed through the night. “Collei!” After numerous calls left with no answers, lumps of tears began crawling down your cheeks. “Oh my archon,” you sobbed. You could imagine the look on Tighnari’s face, the worry, the anger, the disappointment.
The feeling of losing them was clawing to your soul, like a mother bird losing her chick after their first flight. If they go missing, it was your fault. That fact will forever stain your soul, haunting your remaining days until the sweet release of death.
You sat on a curb, just near the entrance of the bazaar in hopes that the little girl and the architect would return unharmed. More tears had revealed themselves as your thoughts grew more and more intense, terrorizing, even.
The streets were so quiet, only the music from the festival and the first chirps of the crickets seemed to fill your ears, your sobs excluded. No guards or matras were present with you. Who the hell was in charge of security here!? The starry sky brought a comfortable cold instead of blazing heat.
You then heard footsteps from the bazaar and a person sitting beside you. “I walked them home,” a gruff voice sounded, “Collei was getting tired.”
Just your luck, the man who sat with you was no other than Alhaitham. Despite the conflicting emotions that came to you in a flash, you were relieved that Collei was safe. You let out a heavy breath. “Thank you,” you sniff, brushing away the tears that stained your face.
It was quiet again, for a while. You could hear Nilou’s music from outside; “Collei would’ve loved seeing Nilou dance,” you thought aloud. “I remember her basking about it when she had just became Tighnari’s pupil.” Suddenly, you felt calmer, safer now that the eerie silence accompanied you with the presence of the man you knew as well as breathing.
—
Alhaitham couldn’t say anything, busying himself gazing upon your eyes and your weakly pulled smile. There was still sadness lingering within them, covered by a coating of relief. He felt remorse for taking Collei away from you, for making you worry like this, for leaving you in the dark for a long, long time. Nonetheless, he was happy it led to you talking to him again. He was almost certain this day would never come.
Then he is reminded of you dancing with another man. His heart pounded erratically against his chest, each beat echoing the tumultuous storm of emotions raging within him. He had come to the festival in search of hope and redemption, a fleeting reprieve from the pain that chewed up his soul. But instead, he had found more heartache, contrary to the plan.
As he watched you twirl and sway with the man’s hand in yours, he felt as though the world tilted off its axis, leaving him teetering on the precipice of anguish. How could you be dancing so freely with another when every fiber of his being yearned to hold you so close, to feel the warmth you gave him once more?
His hands clenched into fists against his knees, his jaw tightened with unexpressed emotion. He remembered how badly he wanted to look away, but the flow of your hair and how gracefully you moved wouldn’t let him, it was as if you had casted a spell upon him, forever tormenting him to stay on the sidelines, to repress the overwhelming desire to be the one twirling you around and making you smile.
A surge of conflicting emotions washed over him—a searing pang of jealousy intertwined with a profound sense of regret and longing. Then just when he was ready to cross the bridge that separated you, he felt a small tug on his darkened cape. “Mr. Scribe Alhaitham,” Collei said meekly, sheepishly rubbing her eyes, “Did the plan work?”
He remembers Kaveh’s words, so filled with determination, She’ll do anything for Collei, so if she asks to go to the festival, Y/N will for sure accompany her! Once the slow dance starts, that’s when you’ll swoop in and declare your love.
And if it doesn’t work?, the scribe raised his eyebrows.
It will! I’ll make sure no one gets near her.
Boy, did that plan go to shit.
He gave the little girl a soft smile despite the mind-numbing pain in his chest. He knelt down to her level, “Isn’t Kaveh supposed to be with you?”
“Someone was talking to him just a while ago. It seemed pretty heated, so I slipped away when I got the chance,” she yawned.
“Of course,” Alhaitham muttered. Must be a client of his. “You look tired, Collei.”
“I think I’m ready to go home now, Mr. Alhaitham.” The drowsiness in her eyes could barely hold her awake. It was getting late, she must not be used to staying up at times like these.
Alhaitham looked back at you, wondering if you were still keeping your eyes on him. To no avail, it was like you had vanished like a ghost with the beautiful, painful sight he had witnessed along with you. A heavy feeling lingered in his chest, leaving him to wonder if you would lock your gaze with him again. Then he left, accompanying Collei back to her and Tighnari’s cottage.
On his way back to the bazaar for reasons unknown, he found you weeping in your hands, curled up like a shriveled bug beaten down, calling out Collei’s name. After he assured you of the little girl’s safety, you began talking about your experiences with her. Ever so glad, he listened to your voice, melodious and soothing like a lullaby to put him to sleep. The euphoria he experienced was one like no other, it was the first time he felt at peace for eons against the stars and the cool breeze. Then, he wondered, were you feeling the same?
“They found a new Grand Sage,” he announced.
“Is that why you have the time now?” Your words stung his morality, picking on the weak scabs of his mistakes.
He took a moment to respond. “I’m sorry,” he said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “I never meant for any of this to happen.”
Unable to meet his gaze, you managed a casual tone, “I know, Alhaitham.” His name sounded like a song whenever it came from your lips. “Besides, it’s not your fault.” Your voice was then hoarse of emotion, fingers picking at the dirt beneath you. “I shouldn’t have let myself to get lost in my own thoughts.”
“But I should’ve been there for you,” Alhaitham insisted. “I should not have made you feel like you were alone.”
“But it happened anyway.”
For a moment, silence enveloped the space between you, only broken by the distant sounds of the festival. Then, slowly, you turned to meet his gaze, in a light that had no remorse, for the first time since you told him to leave.
“I don’t know if I can forgive you,” you admitted, your voice trembling with uncertainty. “But I do know I’m willing to try.”
With this, Alhaitham took you in a warm embrace, letting out a shaky breath as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. He then held you by the shoulders, teary as you released him from this torture. “I’ll do whatever it takes to make things right again.”
As you looked into his eyes, you found the sincerity in his voice, determination reflecting upon his irises. Despite everything that had happened, you couldn’t deny the hope that ignited in your stomach. Maybe, just maybe, there was still a chance to find your way back together.
You held his hands first, then traced your way to his cheeks, warm with anticipation. Then you pulled him into a kiss that was long overdue, Alhaitham almost tumbling from the force you had exerted.
As your lips meet, there is a softness, a tenderness in the way they press together, as if each touch carries the weight of a thousand whispered promises. Time seems to stand still as you both lose yourselves in the sensation, senses heightened by the intoxicating blend of warmth and desire. It's a symphony of sensations—a gentle caress, a fleeting brush of lips, a silent exchange of emotions that speaks volumes without a single word. And in that fleeting moment, you find solace, connection, and a sense of belonging in each other's embrace.
Slow as the breeze blew your hair, everything froze and only he brought the fire to relieve you of your vains. Alhaitham’s lips were soft and cold, clearly waiting for this day to come. When he leaned back for air, foreheads connected together, you breathed, “I love you.”
As you heard the crowd’s applause from a distance, as if cheering for your reconciling, he replied, “I love you more,” before pulling you in for another well-deserved kiss.
—the end.—
#genshin fanfic#genshin impact#genshin x reader#alhaitham x reader#alhaitham fanfic#alhaitham angst#angst to comfort#4ggravate#alhaitham#alhaitham comfort#dehyarzad#genshin dehya#dunyarzad
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Silco was set up to be Fishbones from the start
Disclaimer: I won't take season 2 into account At All, because it can't work with setups and payoffs even if its life depends on it.
Alrighty. As we've seen Season 1 paid a lot of attention to set up canon things from LoL into the show as naturally and logically as possible, and at least from my point of view, it handled the job with flying colors. Jayce's hammer, Vi's gauntlets, Vander/Warwick etc, nothing felt out of place. But how does Silco fit into this at all? Let's get down to business to defeat the huns
First of all, what even is Fishbones? In the canon of LoL, it's one of if not the most iconic weapon Jinx has. And it is not only a weapon to her, but a loyal and "beloved" companion, as it's described in one of her skins. She constantly talks to it, and in contrast to her chaotic and impulsive nature, Fishbones is very pragmatic and calm. Sounds like a certain someone, doesn't it? But let's not get ahead of ourselves.
But how does Silco go from being Jinx's father to one of her weapons? There are a lot of points that support that actually, I was surprised myself ngl.
- Silco is the only character in the entire series who is directly and tightly connected to water and underwater creatures. Silco was "reborn" in the water when Vander tried to kill him, the first office he had was placed under the water, with a huge observational window. Silco is also fond of underwater creatures, and while other people call and see them as monsters, Silco pays no attention to it, as he thinks that there's "a monster inside all of us". And here's Fishbones, who is designed after a shark, arguably the most famous "underwater monster". But what is more interesting is that it debuted is the finale of season 1, which is titled "The monster you created". Quite a throughline there.
- Silco was the reason behind Fishbones' creation in the first place. While it does seem that it all started with Jinx, who stole the hex gemstone on the Progress Day, we also need to remember WHY she did it. She did it to impress Silco specifically, to make him to be proud of her. This want was triggered by her screwing up the smuggling mission earlier that day, and while Silco didn't scold her for it much and only advised her to rest for a bit, she saw this as him thinking that she's weak. So, after all of this Silco asks Jinx to make a weapon with the use of gemstone. Not necessarily to use it against Piltover, but to have it as a wild card if his plans go wrong. Jinx agrees and attempts to reverse engineer it, but it triggers her memories when she killed Mylo and Claggor with her bomb, so she tells Silco that she can't do it. He then goes to the river he was nearly killed in with her, and "baptises" her to help her let go of her fear of pain. This seemed to have worked, at least for a little while, because she managed to finish the weapon. So, in conclusion: Fishbones' creation was triggered by Jinx's want to impress Silco, and he helped her with its creation on every step of the way.
- this point is somewhat meta, but I'll use it anyway. In previously mentioned episode 9 Silco tells Jinx that everybody around them betrays them, and they have only each other to love and lean on. He says, quote: "Everyone betrays us, Jinx. Vander, her. It's only us". At the same time, in LoL Jinx says this line to Fishbones: "It's just you and me, Fishbones!". Well.....it's certainly a callback if I've seen one. Like- it's not even funny. They couldn't have written this line on accident.
- now onto the most interesting part for me personally. We all now that there are no accidents in animation, like. At all. Even if there are this is extremely rare, as every frame is created intentionally. Now, we do now that there are quite. A few discrepancies between writers and animators of arcane, but I don't think this applies in this particular case. Now onto the actual point. So, in the finale of season 1 Jinx kills Silco, and it's shown to us like this.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1009046bf8f564081da65f4ffe7272ba/2cfa66311cf6e8c8-4c/s540x810/d7a7846f45ffe1c5976bcdd56160d574ffcb8639.jpg)
He's turned with right side ("human") of his face to the camera, while the left side ("monster") side is hidden.
As Jinx fires Fishbones at the council
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/0d38c37b152c324213fcb7c7f61c6d8d/2cfa66311cf6e8c8-68/s540x810/7670a99ed28e6ac1376830ae01daeda22b5db46e.jpg)
It's positioned with its right side to the camera, which alignes with Silco's "monster eye". Also, Fishbone's eye has a black scar pattern around its eye, which again, resembles Silco's damadged eye. That could mean that Silco is once again "reborn", and now continues to live on in the monster Jinx created.
And here comes the most awesome part in all of this. When Silco adopts Powder, he hugs her and tells her
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2b6feaa520ee6dd1a9e4006780a9fd19/2cfa66311cf6e8c8-1e/s540x810/20ba8bf2678e6359c00906f04a7e662a2125ba1f.jpg)
Do you see how the frame is positioned? Exactly. It is exactly the same framing scene with Jinx and Fishbones has. And, most importantly, when Jinx pulls the trigger, we hear the exactly same line on the background: "We will show them all". It simultaneously shows: that Jinx's attack on the council is her way of dealing with grief of killing Silco; her way of honoring Silco's fight against Piltover; and a direct transition of Silco into Fishbones. Although he's dead in body, but Jinx's memories of him and his voice now continue to live in Fishbones, her new eternal companion.
I am at awe with the fundamental work that's been done with this setup, and although s2 never followed up on this, I still can get enjoyment from the clear intent creators put here originally.
#we wouldn't even need flashbacks to show Jinx and Silco's relationship in detail if he'd spoke to her as fishbones#this would be the most awesome thing ever#and it still is. in my mind#arcane critical#silco arcane#jinx arcane#silco and jinx#arcane
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hi omg i love ur writings You are literally one of my fav writers 😭😭 can you write sae with a reader who has their nipples pierced??
AAAA THANK YEW ANON BBY FOR UR KIND WORDS! yikess, nipple piercings sound like they hurt but they seem super hot! yr wish is my command anon >:3
"baby you're the baddest - baby you're the baddest girl"
ft. itoshi sae . ooc! sae ? . fem! reader . established relationships . boobs . boobs . boobs . have i mentioned boobs yet? . smut..? . piercings . unreliable narrator :^ . open ending.?
wc: 0.4k
imagine itoshi sae finding out his beloved partner got nipple piercingss!
we all know sae itoshi was not only a butt person but he was also the number one GOAT when it came to patience LMFAO. that certainly contradicted his actions today.
the both of you came back from a day out, sae came back from training, you came back from getting piercings. :3 you never specified where to the itoshi.
he was baffled when he came into your shared bedroom to see you in one of his shirts! >.< well not really baffled, his ass was too tired to notice, except for how the oversized shirt softly framed your perky tits.
his teal eyes sparked some light. "[name]-" he gulped as you shot a look at him. "oouh, hi sae!" you greeted. your smile was absolutely gorgeous, lighting up the darn room. your smile complimented everything ohhh fuck.
the prodigy felt his pants tighten. you smirked a lil, you knew the toll you had on him. the man couldn't help but jus literally POUNCE on you like..
he was swift to get you pinned on the bed and slip his shirt on you up. he shifted the shirt above to your chest. he felt his mouth literally water at the sight of your boobs..
"you got your nipples pierced.?" he asked, his hand moved to your nipple, playing a little with the bud. they were still some what sensitive, you let out a small whine.
his cool calloused fingers had a contrast to your soft warm flesh. he paid some attention to the piercing. he tapped it ever so slightly, having you jolt back.
"you still sensitive?" he asked. you nodded. nah he didnt fucking care he dived straight into your boobs weheejje. you glared at him. it's been a few hours. "you're sucking my boobs like youre a baby, aren't you bored?"
he looked up at your through those looong long lashes... peeling himself off, "nah." and dived back in. "you talk such big game about being patience look at yourself right now, also go shower you stink." you giggled. (ok the man is sweaty but he was training give him a break.)
he peeled himself of your boob again. nodding and understanding what you wanted him to do. he muttered something, "voy a violarte, hermosa."
when he came out the shower (sHIRTLESS AND EVERYTHIGN? oh yesss god.) jus a towel around his waist. "i want my shirt back." sae demanded as he towered over you, the soft mattress sinking due to the weight.
"huh-" you were cut off as you got flipped onto your stomach. your ass and boobs are going to be so sore tomorrow.. hey, your sensitive nipples are going to GET it the moment you wake up, piercings and him abusing the fuck out of the buds :((
— ©isaisliterallyhim, 2025
tags: @twijaxx ♡, @kyvkc
a/n: woohoo i finally posted!sorry this took so long to get out everythings j lyign in my drafts my bad anon this was a lazy ahh post... not proofread btw so the english is fried GAHAHA i gave up half ways o im sorry for not being able to serve but shhh, i tried... sae's hot you're hot nipple piercings oh gawd
#bllk x reader#bllk imagines#bllk drabbles#bllk x you#blue lock x you#blue lock x reader#bllk x y/n#blue lock x y/n#bllk smut#sae itoshi#itoshi sae x you#itoshi sae x y/n#itoshi sae x reader#itoshi x reader#sae x you#sae x y/n#sae x reader#sae smut#itoshi sae smut#sae itoshi x reader#lazy post#light smut#itoshi sae#chase atlantic was playing#i love chase atlantic#isaisliterallyhimwrites#im flopping
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