#the way he just says this so casually while looking at the PC like THIS???

[carmsgarms]

Join me, I need you by my side.

Very well. Now our roots can deepen, together

[marblepasta-creepyhornet]

Usually don’t send requests, but since you asked: which creeps do you think would take psychic damage from a friend or partner who purposefully misuses slang? Just thought to ask cus I thought Ben would probably have a physical reaction and I think that mental image was funny lol 

———

Characters used: Ben, Jeff, and EJ, Tim

———

BEN:

He’ll cringe. No questions.

Now, I headcanon Ben as a self-taught modern-day gamer in the creepypasta universe (as in he’s bought every modern day consoles and devices and has slowly learned the mechanics and is now an expert), he’s got a plethora of video games for all his devices, his PC, consoles, Nintendo switch, and even his old DS!

So imagine when he’s showing you a new game he got for his switch….

But then immediately regrets it.

As you were sat in his lap, watching him play, you just casually drop, “Wow, Ben! This game looks so litty on fleek, fam!”

MF hasn’t EVER put his hands on you, but he is now-

He pushed you off his lap and looked at you like you kicked a puppy!

“I…I can’t even look at you,” he’d be all dramatic, “I don’t know who that was, but I NEVER wanna see them again!”

You’d just be laying in the floor in a puddle of giggles.

———

Jeff:

It would happen on a mission. You and Jeff were targeted with killing a family and to leave none of them alive!

So, let’s say the targets son was a bit more than Jeff bargained for, so you swooped in and had to save the day, managing to tie the kids arms behind his back, “GET FUCKING YEETED, SCRUBLORD!”

Radio silence.

“WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?!”

“What do you mean? Like, we gotta yeet him, you catching my driftwood, fam? No cap!”

At this point Jeff just rubs his temples and finishes off the target by stabbing him. His brain too absorbed in other things to try and decipher whatever you’re talking about.

Soon after you two left, blood stained and all, Jeff spoke up, “Please, never ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, talk like that again!”

“Alright fine! No need to get so hostile, we gucci lit” you finished off with finger guns and a sly chuckle.

“(N/N)!”

———

EJ:

You were sick. Like, contagious sick.

So, per Jack’s orders, no leaving his infirmary only for the bathroom, always cough and sneeze into the elbow and not the hand, use tissues sparingly, wash your hands, and take showers to help alleviate headaches and open up your sinuses.

Unrelated, but don’t worry, he’s made sure his baby gets the best comfort, after all, he needs you well rested and feeling better! 🥺💙

It was around 8pm when he knocked on the door before slowly opening it, he was dressed in pajamas holding a bowl of soup, “Hi, love” He’d greet you with a smile, not wearing his mask, as a demon he couldn’t get sick and because he was comfy around you, “How’s my baby doing?” 😭

Of course you’d answer the same way every time, stating you were still sick, just like since the beginning of the week. 😔

“I made you some soup, I know it isn’t much, but it’ll help alleviate some symptoms, and you look like you’re freezing, baby” he’d say while handing you the soup.

You took a few bites of the noodle and a carrot piece, a small moan escaped your lips, “Fuccckk~ This shit is straight bussin’, Jack”

His smile that he had while watching you eat was replaced with one of confusion. “W-what?” 😩

You’d have to suppress a giggle, “What do you mean, ‘what? This soups straight bussin’”

He’d try to understand what you meant, trying to wrack his brain for any semblance of what the word could mean 😭

Overall, confused baby boi :(

Tim (Masky):

Masky angled the binoculars as he let out a low growl, watching as the group of targets were stationed at all access points. “Fuck.” He grumbled before lowering the piece of equipment as he turned to you and Hoodie. “This is gonna be a close call, they’re stationed at all points of access. Do you guys have your weapons?”

Hoodie gave Tim a firm nod as he pulled out his pistol from his hoodie pocket, Masky reached into his duffle bag and pulled out a rifle, cocking it. He was about to ask you when you suddenly grabbed the weapon.

“Whoa! This thing is so fire!” You’d say as you inspected it with awe. “Tim, bro! This gun so fire! This definitely screams ‘I have BDE but I’m not trying to make it a big deal’, you know what I mean?”

…

….

“What the actual fuck are you talking about?!” He’d ask in confusion and irritation, quickly yanking his rifle back from you, “And give me that!”

You let out a small yelp when it was harshly yanked from your hands. “Calm down, Timmy, on the DL you’re still on my DTF list frfr. No cap”

Masky silently sat the rifle down, gloved hands pinching the bridge nose of the porcelain mask.

Overall: disappointment, confusion and irritation.

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 5

Propaganda

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

Young hot rocker dilf

Loyal to his dead wife <3

Does in fact smoke weed

BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)

His band was a Christmas cover band btw.

Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy

Anti government (ofc)

Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)

Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??

Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch

One incredibly buff arm

Has a pet rat named after his son <3

Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged

OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE

HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON

A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)

HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS

IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED

Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence

Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!

I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.

Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so

HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.

Glenn is the goofiest sexiest character there is and I will die on this hill! I will ride into battle for him! what Dndads created is truly unique and Glenn is a key part of that and for that he deserves to win. I said it before and I'll say it again - GLENN SWEEEEEP

Can we talk about how he says ‘baby’ casually? Like he just calls people that?? That’s HOT. THAT IS HOT!! He’s also bilingual and knows Japanese!!!! He’s a big dumb idiot with a lot of charisma!!!!!! HE WORKED AT A BDSM PLACE FOR TWO SEPARATE ONE SHOTS. HES SO SAD BUT PLAYS IT OFF LIKE HE’S CHILL ALL THE TIME!! HE DOESN’T THINK OF HIMSELF AS SINGLE BECAUSE HE DIDN’T DIVORCE HIS DEAD WIFE!!! He’s like.. the perfect guy. We need this win.

I’d also like to add the fact I made this. Which is the first 11 episodes edited to (almost) only have Glenn in them <3 which is a level of insanity I hope to reiterate. These took hours to make. I wouldn’t do that for anyone else.

Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.

Mod Note 2: This tournament is about fictional podcast characters. Please do not vote for the real actress Glenn Close.

Amber Gris (The Adventure Zone: Ethersea):

Middle aged woman who punches sharks to death. My hero

If you love me you'll vote for amber gris I swear to everything holy on earth amen

Amber is butch, instant win

Amber Gris has a negative charisma modifier and she pissed her pants on purpose in order to trick a guard and knock him out. She tied up a dude. She once killed an evil magic shark (they're out for murder. not like real sharks) by punching it and then picked it up and smashed it into another shark, also killing it. She talks in a southern accent. She calls people guppy because it indicates a lack of respect. She has a big pair of magical green arms that come from her stomach. She got a fancy jacket and immediately ripped its sleeves off. She has a gay thing going on with one of the political leaders in the city. She gets in fights with people and doesnt do vulnerability and tries to lay low and not get in any social trouble she doesn't have to. She jumped through a portal into a new world because she could. She's now the god of said world, alone with only afformentioned political leader, who was previously possessed and she had to fight. She spends her time in a bar called the Cloaca. She calls people she doesn't like claspers, because it means shark penis. She and her friend, an old man named Uncle Joshy, sneak attack each other and yell VIBE CHECK! She tries to talk fancy to impress people and she's really bad at it (verily).

She’s everything and more. She’s irreverent. She punches sharks for a living. She becomes God. What more do you need in a butch.

amber gris propaganda: she is straightup the physical embodiment of "women want me, fish fear me." also she's an appalachian post apocalyptic sea captain. that's just objectively cool.

AMBER GRIS IS PUNCHES SHARKS AND IS (one of) THE MOST BADASS BLACK WOMEN PCS IN DND SHOWS IVE EVER SEEN. SHES INCREDIBLE AND A WIN FOR DYKES EVERYWHERE

amber's creator said she was based off of the type of working-class woman you commonly see in appalachia where "this is the sort of woman that you see walking past CVS, and you know that a truck could hit her and it would just split around her as she continued to go pick up whatever she had to do that day." and that's pretty hot

guys Amber becomes lesbian god of the new world with her childhood “”friend””

#amber gris is LITERALLY a middle-aged butch #she would win this entire tournament in a just world

Last time Amber got horny was when she killed that shark

"it was a savage bummer though, don't-- trust me, there's nothing that great about a history. You know? I got one. What did I do, killed a bunch of sharks? Last time I got horny, god and christ I can't even tell you-- well, it was when I killed that shark. But! Hey. We're all just kinda figuring it out."

Moonshine Cybin (Not Another D&D Podcast: Bahumia):

She's a hot elf with mushrooms growing on her. She has 1 level of barbarian. She's bisexual. She shapeshifted into a dragon and ate a god.

how tf does the post not mention Moonshine’s giant boobs her greatest asset

Moonshine has canonically gone down on a woman for a solid hour without asking for anything in return. Moonshine edged a dryad just by kissing them. Moonshine faced down someone being controlled to kill everyone in his path and told him if he still wanted to hurt her, she would take his blows as a friend. Moonshine makes jambalaya for her family and friends. Moonshine mispronounced someone’s name for a month and that woman still wanted to hook up with Moonshine. These are just a few of the reasons why Moonshine is sexy.

shes illiterate

canonically huffs dirty water from a bong

has big tatas

wears a belly chain with a demon trapped in it

almost became the queen of hell

ate a god

turned into a pregnant moose & gave birth

The woman she went down on for an hour asking nothing in return is still hung up on her, 200 years later. Moonshine is unmatched

To be clear the woman whose name Moonshine mispronounced for a month and then hooked up with is the same woman she went down on for an hour, and the same woman who is still flustered over her 200 years later. The rizz is unparalleled. She’s also incredibly kind and accepting of others, and goes out of her way to bolster her friends. The party always requests one big bed.

moonshine cybin is a druid who learned counterspell through sheer force of will. moonshine cybin turned one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse into a dolphin, flew him 60 feet up into the air, dropped him on the ground, and then spit spores into his face to kill him. moonshine cybin turned into a dragon and bit the head off of a double god. moonshine cybin was willing to confine herself to an eternal hell to save the world. moonshine cybin is a dragon rider. you know what you must do.

Amber and Moonshine Together

Look at them. They should not have to fight when they could be gay instead. Imagine the power they would have combined... Every lesbian in a hundred mile radius of the post would swoon. It may be an odd alliance, but from an Ethersea fan to Bahumia fans, i believe this will strengthen both our odds. I have always been insane about Amber Gris but through this poll I have also learned about Moonshine and come to love her too. Take my hand... We can do this together...

OKAY HEAR ME OUT MOONSHINE AND AMBER WOULD GET ALONG SO WELL

appalachian sapphic solidarity!

Art of Amber and Moonshine from @pirateknight.

[delvalentine]

BLLK relationship firsts: who was interested first, who confessed first, & who initiated the first kiss.

❥ Headcanons for: H. Chigiri, M. Bachira, R. Itoshi, R. Mikage, S. Nagi, Y. Isagi

❥ Notes/Tags: Implied time skip ages, SFW, gn!reader, spoiler-free

❥ WC: drabble (~350w each)

❥ PC: HDR ♡

♡ Yoichi Isagi

❥ Who was interested first: you

Isagi would be too in his head to notice your growing crush on him. He’s lucky you’re attracted to his ambition and talent, because he’s definitely the dense type to let flirting fly over his head. Hang in there.

❥ Who confessed first: him

After (finally) picking up on your (heavy-handed) cues, he tries to strategize the perfect way to step up your friendship and ask you to go on a date with him as a partner. He had it all figured out. Where he’d take you, what he’d say, what you’d say, etc. He ran the outcomes like the true strategist he is. But you show up in an outfit that makes his brain melt and he gets so anxious and tongue-tied in the moment that he basically just blurts out “will you go out with me?” instead of the rehearsed speech he had in mind. It’d be easier for him to play in a tie-breaking internationally-streamed match than try to be suave. Luckily for him, you already had him all figured out (he was sweating bullets and acting so stiff, after all) and was just waiting for your opportunity to say ‘yes’.

❥ Who initiated the first kiss: you

Once again, he had this masterful plan that crumbled to pieces when he actually had to put it into action. His nerves just aren’t adapted to dealing with you. Something about you makes him short-circuit and go blank, and it’s adorable to have Yocchan in the palm of your hand. While he’s stuck on the details of trying to direct the perfect first kiss, brow furrowed and quiet in his thoughts, you lean over and gently press a kiss to his cheek. He basically explodes, before getting shy and upset that you beat him to it when he wanted to kiss you. He doesn’t realize that you’re smart enough to know how to play him; you just need to make it a competition, and he immediately plays along. He’s inexperienced and you’re his first, but he learns quickly… about how to ‘devour’ you.

♡ Seishiro Nagi

❥ Who was interested first: you

He’s popular amongst the masses because of his height, good looks, athletic talent, academic smarts, and other wildly impressive traits. You never thought you had a chance in high heaven with him, so you settled for having a crush at a distance. You nurtured your feelings privately and had fun in your daydreams of dating the pro athlete. It was already enough for you to even meet him, but to imagine that he actually wants you to stick around?! That definitely made you feel shy, but he reassures you (and makes you fall even harder, dammit) by telling you that you make him feel comfortable. 

❥ Who confessed first: him

Nagi probably assumes that the two of you are together without actually establishing it because he thought it was obvious that he liked you back. He ends up announcing your supposed relationship during a live interview, which blows up your phone to the point where you have to delete your apps because they kept crashing. He properly asks you to be his partner after the misunderstanding, sheepishly offering flowers and a plushie of your favourite Pokémon as an apology. He looks like he feels genuinely bad about it, so how could you not forgive him? He isn’t a smiley person, but he can’t stop grinning when you tell him you’re happy to be his significant other. 

❥ Who initiated the first kiss: him

It would be very casual. He’d give you a sleepy peck on the cheek that flusters you because of how out of the blue it is. He’d have the nerve to look confused about why you’re so worked up about it and does the temperature check thing with his hand while peering deep into your eyes to see what’s making you so nervous—as if it’s not him. When you mutter that you were expecting him to ask, he asks you point blank if he can kiss you again. This is the moment where he realizes he’s addicted to making you blush because of him. 

♡ Meguru Bachira

❥ Who was interested first: him

He basically saw you and immediately went “I want that one”. He does everything he can to get your attention and get close to you. He’s not shy about pestering you to spend time with him and asks you specifically to cheer him on. This strategy backfires. His attempts to court you are so direct that you end up not taking him seriously, assuming he’s joking around like usual. He complains about this to anybody that’ll listen or tolerate staying in the same room as him as he whines about you not getting the hint. 

❥ Who confessed first: him

Bachi’s impatient and confesses way too soon. Even though you kindly reject him the first time, he persists. You end up becoming friends first despite knowing about his romantic feelings for you, and over time you start to develop them too. After all, he’s so nice to you and genuinely cares about you and making you smile. It’d be impossible not to fall in love with him. When you finally tell him that you’re starting to feel the same way and can return his affections, he’s over the moon. He never gave up.

❥ Who initiated the first kiss: him

He was so desperately touch-starved for physical touch that he asks to kiss you, his voice actually quiet and uncharacteristically serious for once, maybe some few minutes after you officially become his significant other. He opens an eye to peek at your expression after leaning in, which makes his heart stutter like it always does whenever he’s around you. It’s like he can’t believe this is actually happening even though he’s been trying to get you to fall in love with him like he fell for you on day one. He holds you so tightly it’s like he’s scared you’re going to vanish and he’ll realize it was fake—the way you lean into him tells him that you’re not. 

♡ Hyoma Chigiri

❥ Who was interested first: you

He has a striking look that caught your eye immediately. He’s used to getting confessions and is exceedingly popular, so you didn’t think you were special for liking him and never entertained the notion that he would like you back. It was important to you and him that you maintained a good friendship, but that platonic bond was quick to blur into something that was intimate in a different way. 

❥ Who confessed first: him

Chigiri has seen a lot of shoujo anime and knows the tricks and tips inside out. He gives you a picture perfect confession. The two of you go out in yukata to attend a matsuri/summer festival, your hair both tied back in ornate styles that complimented each other’s look. You play games together (where he wins you all the prizes you ask for) and share street food. He wipes powdered sugar off your lip with a thumb and laughs at your expression. When the fireworks burst out over the night sky, he reaches for your hand and squeezes it tightly. After all the noise has cleared, he asks you to be his partner. It’s romantic, and maybe it’s cheesy, but you happily say yes.

❥ Who initiated the first kiss: him

You cannot tell me he wouldn’t try a kabedon on you. Though he is very gentle with you and never aggressive, he does know exactly what to do to make your knees weak. He presses a fist on the doorframe above your head, simpering down at you, hair falling over his face, the pink only accentuating the burning look he gives you. He leans in slowly, giving you a chance to back out or ask him to stop, but you don’t. The kiss is very passionate and befitting of somebody that values chivalry and caring for your partner as much as he does. 

♡ Rin Itoshi

❥ Who was interested first: him

You first piqued his interest by making a sassy quip when he accidentally ignored you. He’s still getting used to the whole “be nice” concept but still doesn’t care much for people who aren’t involved in the soccer world. You’re one of the first to be noticed by him, even though the two of you are so different. He’s rarely this curious about somebody that isn’t a sports rival.

❥ Who confessed first: you

Rin would rather die than show somebody that he’s vulnerable, so even if it’s quite evident that he has romantic feelings for you, he simply pretends he doesn’t. You basically have to sit him down and say, word for word, “I like you and want to be with you” before he can work up the nerve to face his own feelings. He’s so used to people he loved leaving him that he’s terrified of going through the same hurt. He thought it’d be better off never even trying than having it fail or get rejected. The last thing he wants is to drive off another person he’s starting to care about. But then he looks at you and feels like a total idiot for denying himself the chance to be with you in the first place. He starts to bet on faith and love again. Even though he’s still scared of rejection or having a falling out, he’s willing to risk the heartbreak if he can have the chance to be with you.

❥ Who initiated the first kiss: him

He lives by philosophy. He doesn’t lose, and he doesn’t waste time. Inefficiency is worthless to him. Your first kiss with him is  surprisingly not awkward; he drops you off at your place after a quiet date and chastely presses a goodbye kiss to your lips with his finger guiding your chin up. He steels himself to sprint away after such an out of character display of affection, but is shocked (and surprisingly cooperative) when you grab the collar of his coat and pull him in for a deeper one. 

♡ Reo Mikage

❥ Who was interested first: him

He did not want to like you at first. You always teased him and never took him seriously; it was an emasculating experience for him since he was so used to having his way. But that annoyance meant he never stopped thinking about you, and sure enough, in true enemies to friends to lovers fashion… that “I hate them” began to morph into the panic of “Oh god, wait. Do I like them?”

❥ Who confessed first: him

He, delulu, definitely ruined more than a couple of flowers (and toothbrushes) to try and divine if “they love me, they love me not”. If the last pull ended up on “not”, he would immediately find another one and keep going until it landed on “they love me”. He’s so emotional and almost pathetic when he asks you out, a hot mess of a tsundere if you’ve ever seen one. He moreso declares that the two of you are together instead of really asking. He fully expected you to make fun of him like you always did, but you treated him with a lot more gentle patience which only sealed his fate of being head over heels in love with you. 

❥ Who initiated the first kiss: you

Even though Reo’s obsessed with you, you’re the one who kisses him first, mainly just to see his reaction when he’s caught off guard. He gets so flustered so easily and demands, stuttering, that you “explain yourself this instant!” Your explanation is another kiss, which just about makes him pass out. You kiss him when he tries to retaliate, cutting off every attempt of his to start a sentence until finally he gets the cue to shut up and accept your love. His face is so petulant when you’re done, but he’s too proud to ask you to kiss him again, so he ends up taking a leaf out of your book and moving in to take what he wants. 

[sweet-luv-club]

✎ breastfeeding m! Kylar like he deserves ♡

. . . ˚✧.⊹ tags ⊹⁺. ೀ

2.5k words (wow im a horny bastard), informal writing, m! Kylar with cock, unprotected p in v sex, unrealistic sex, Kylar is a very submissive and pathetic (/affectionate) top, lactating pc from cow transformation, BIG GIANT TATAS and AFAB anatomy terms. u got coochie n it'll b called cunt and pussy but Kylar doesn't call u by either feminine terms or masculine terms so it's,,, gender-neutral reader-ish??

. . . ⋆ ꮺ˚⊹ notes ⊹ ༘˚

WHY BOTHER HAVING A BREAST MILK MECHANIC IF U CANT GIVE IT TO ANY OF THE LOVE INTERESTS... SMH VREL GET ON IT /LH also dis is a shoutout to da fellow transmascs like me that don't mind hvin big tatas 2 feed kylar <33 my first full fic i tink!! enjoy!!!

♡ ┆ u 2 are on a date at the park as usual. when u casually suggest it, his brain just stops working. his mouth hangs open and u have to shake him to snap him out of it. 

"uhh, haha, sorry, darling... c-could you repeat that?"

with a smirk, you do. you lean in and suggest going somewhere private so he could enjoy your milk directly from the source. all the blood in his cheeks rush to his cock almost immediately. he is so down bad for u, he's fucking floored u even suggested it.

♡ ┆ he gets more cocky, confident, and possessive during sex, but at this point, he's only squeezed your chest so far, not sure how he could even begin to explain himself. he’s seen u lactate when u cum, he just didnt know if it was overstepping a boundary to just dive in. its early into the relationship so he doesnt know if youre comfortable with that part of your bovine biology. hes a perv but hes also a polite boy!!  well... most of the time ♡ he couldnt just walk up to u and say i want ur milk babe, you deserve better than that, he just didnt know how to ask... so ofc he's over the moon you're the one who brought it up

♡ ┆ absolutely solidifies in his mind that you're an angel sent from heaven to protect him and love him

♡ ┆ he's a stinky little anime nerd /pos. pre-relationship, after you saved him from bullies, he draws u and ur cute fluffy cow ears and massive anime-like tits in all sorts of erotic ways. does all the hentai tropes. fists his needy, leaky cock at night to the drawings he's made of u. when you start dating, it was like he was walking on cloud 9 when you wanted to recreate some of his erotic drawings (bc ofc u pushed to see his sketchbook when he mentioned it was full of only u lol)

♡ ┆ cant go to the manor, kylar isnt comfy w that yet. cant be in pc’s bedroom, kylar doesnt even want a single chance of someone who knows you and lives with you to see u giving him milk, it's his and only his in sight, sound,,, and ofc taste. hed get jealous if other orphans u live with saw yall doing it, bc if they see he thinks theyre never gonna forget the sight..... which could lead 2 all sorts of trouble since they live with u and he doesnt. he wants it to only be his even in memory. PATHETIC /POS so yalls only option is a cheap-ass love hotel. maybe someday youll fuck somewhere nicer but this’ll have to do… not to mention kylar is thrumming w/ excitement. he’s fucking trembling at the mere thought of getting to taste your sweet milk, directly from your heavy chest which was always tempting him… PATHETIC /POS (1)

♡ ┆ at first, kylar cant get his bearings. he sits next to u on the bed, hands politely on his lap while his cock strains against his pants. hes strangely silent until u snap him out of it with a kiss on the cheek. “ah… d-darling, you don’t know how much this means to me.” he says in a shaky voice. you chuckle and slowly begin to lift your shirt, making sure to give him a show. the way your heavy tits laden with the milk he craves always looked like they were spilling out, your bra barely being able to hold them back never failed to do a number on kylar’s psyche. 

♡ ┆ ”c’mon, you’ve already seen me lactate. get me wet first, babe, then it’ll come out.” you tease as you unclasp your bra effortlessly and toss it to the side, your tits swaying with every movement you make. kylar is hypnotized. just a lot of spacing out in general until you two really get into it.

♡ ┆ your back is laid on the bed, and Kylar moves to get your pants and panties off. the sight never fails to make him breathless. he figures the quickest way to taste your sweet milk is to eat you out, so he does, very diligently. he dives in and devours your pussy like a man starved, he does this every time. he just can’t believe someone as perfect as you would willingly give yourself to him, and he wants to show his gratitude properly, always…

♡ ┆ this mf latches onto your cunt with an intense need and desperation. not only is he making his beloved feel good, he’s working to get your milk flowing as well… it makes him especially ravenous. licking up and sucking on your sensitive folds, using his hands to part your lips and plunge his tongue into you deeper… when you pat his fluffy, unkempt hair and moan… “fuuuuck yes, that’s it, good boy…” he goes absolutely ballistic in his brain. it goes w/o saying that he has a praise kink, loves giving and receiving it. he’s especially emboldened when he feels his head sandwiched between the softness of your thighs, he’s going delirious with need at this point, eyes all half-lidded and bleary, focused on nothing but lapping up the fluids your cunt makes. he's fucking groaning against your folds, can't get enough of your sweet taste. his cock is straining to be free right now, but your pleasure takes precedence.

♡ ┆ eventually, he takes your clit into his mouth and sucks hard, tongue swirling around it as he’s making you scream. “K-Kylar!!” it fills him with a sick thrill, like he’s letting all the strangers in this damn sleazy love hotel know that he’s the one making his darling cry out with pleasure. he pulls back for a moment, a string of saliva connecting between your cunt and his lips to smirk confidently at you. “that’s it, darling, let it all out.” he says, as he’s licking a broad stripe up your pussy, “let them all hear how much you love what i’m doing to you.”

♡ ┆ the moment he sees your tits drip with milk, he unlatches his mouth from your cunt with a soft pop, halting the intense suctions for now. his eyes sparkle with curiosity and hunger, seeing you laid out on the bed with your cheeks flushed, mouth hung agape from moaning so much just does something to his fucked up brain. he wastes no time capturing a nipple into his mouth and giving a hard suck, groaning when your milk hits his tastebuds. it’s the best thing he’s ever tasted…

♡ ┆ he kneads at your tit, trying to coax more and more milk out of you as your cow ears flicker atop your head. needless to say, he’s getting off on your moans, the taste of your creaminess, and the softness of your chest… he loves it. all of this, it’s only for him and him alone. he laminates your nipple with spit using his tongue, moaning as he drinks up every last drop. keeping a hand on your pussy, he gently bites down, making you yelp, yet he also felt your cunt twitch at the action… that gives him an idea for later. he shows love to your other breast, licking up all of the milk that had been dripping off to the side as his fingers rub at your pussy, the slick sounds making his head spin. his breaths are heavy and erratic as it fans over your exposed skin, adding a layer of eroticism from his desperation being conveyed this way. 

♡ ┆ finally… the moment he’d been waiting for. he releases his mouth and cups both of your heavy breasts, pressing them close together and sucking on both your nipples at the same time. wow… just like in his hentai mangas. the sensation makes you feel embarrassed, but you can’t deny how good it feels, either… as his fingers dig into your plush, large chest, he suckles, licks, and bites, doing anything to get more milk into his mouth again. some of it drips in between your chest, and it gives him a devious idea…

♡ ┆ he retreats for now, taking a finger to swipe up a drop of milk on his chin and lick it, a crazed hunger in his green eyes. he pulls down his pants and boxers… out comes his cock, blushed at the tip and leaky with pre-cum. “darling… would you be willing to hold up your chest for me, please?” he asks in a sweet voice, and you comply without question. you already knew what he was planning without him having to outright say it.

♡ ┆ he holds the sides of your breasts securely and moves up on the bed, positioning himself under your chest. you feel something hard underneath your boobs… and without further ado, Kylar thrusts his cock in. he moans so loud, breathing sooo heavily as he pistons his hips… he’s just in pure disbelief. the milk that had dripped between your chest earlier aids him in creating a slick passage between your pillowy tits. it takes him all his willpower to not immediately cum… which he inevitably fails. his cock splatters all over your chest, and a little bit gets on your face. “ah…!! i-oh no, i’m so sorry… i couldn’t help it, it just felt too good…” he pouts with a voice whinier than usual. you reassure him that it’s more than okay with a sultry smile, and you collect his cum with your fingers, licking it all up.

♡ ┆ the sight of you doing that of your own volition without him even asking to… grrr he’s going feral! and he realized you hadn’t cum once! that just won’t do. so while waiting for his cock to stiffen up again, he pulls out and lowers himself back down and thrusts a finger into your dripping entrance. he gets off on the sound of your moans, and he reaches down to take a nipple into his mouth again, the dual sensation of kylar’s suction and his finger curling inside you driving you mad. he establishes a rhythm with both actions, and it’s not long before he adds another finger into you, the squelching noises from your naughty pussy tempting him making his cock twitch back to life very quickly. as your inner walls tighten around his fingers, he searches desperately for your sweet spot while feverishly lapping up any milk from your breasts. and finally… he finds that one gummy mass inside you and just absolutely goes to town on it, making you cry out loudly. he reluctantly detached himself from your tit, and as his fingers were pressing down on your sweet spot, he held his hand firmly over your pubic mound, pressing down and quickening the pace of his fingers going in and out of you. it’s not long before you scream his name and cum on his fingers, soaking his hand in your precious nectar… not to mention your chest flowing with milk as well.

♡ ┆ he’s now hard again… and you take a moment to catch your breath. he’s too impatient this time, however, he wants to thrust into you now. you feel his cock press against your overly sensitive entrance but you manage to gently push him down onto the bed to take control of the situation. “ah ah ah. not so fast.  just came, ya horndog.” you tease lightly, while kylar groans and pouts. you reach down and press a kiss to his lips, your tongues meeting each other once again as they get entangled. you taste a hint of your own milk. kylar can feel your breasts pressing up against him, the weight making him get more needy and feverish with his kissing. his breath hitches when you start grinding your cunt onto him, tip of his cock leaking with cum onto his tummy as your pussy presses down on it. your hips buck back and forth on top of him as you take control, allowing yourself to rest while keeping kylar sated.

♡ ┆ when you’re finally ready to have sex, you teasingly bounce your cunt on the tip of his cock, and you see tears in his eyes. “pc- my love, come, on, let me in, pleasepleaseplease- ah!!” 

his babbling is interrupted by you finally giving him what he wants. as your velvety walls sink down onto him, threatening to overwhelm his senses, you press your breasts onto his face. “you know what to do.” you say with a flirtatious smirk. kylar immediately gets the memo, he’s been dying to do this since you first saved him. he latches onto your nipples and tugs down at your breasts while you start bouncing your pussy on his cock, the dual sensations driving you both mad.

♡ ┆ you’re expertly riding him as he whimpers helplessly beneath you, humping into him so hard the headboard slams into the wall from your passion. his mouth is overflowing with your milk like he wanted… his brain is just melting, much to your delight. your cow tail swishes behind you playfully as he grabs your plush hips and thrusts up into your movements, the sounds of your moans and wet slapping reverberating in the room. 

♡ ┆ the warmth and softness of your cunt makes him wanna cum again. poor boy… he was never good at lasting long. “kylar, hold yourself back right now or else i’m pulling myself off.” you tease, but he takes that to heart and whines in disappointment. “i’ll be good… i’ll be good, pc, i promise, just please dont, ah… leave me!” you smile at him. “i’m not leaving you dummy, ever.”

neuron activation time……. his eyes widen in disbelief as affection floods his heart. he grips your hips more firmly, thrusting up into you at such an animalistic pace that the poorly constructed bed almost sounds like it'll break. the plush of your ass bounces back on his lap, and it makes him grit his teeth trying to hold back. he has a fire in his eyes, as if his life’s whole purpose now was to make you cum on his cock. he bites down on a nipple like earlier and feels your cunt clench around him. he alternates between bites and hard sucks as his hips thrust desperately upward while you struggle to keep riding him. “that’s a promise, okay? dont! ever! leave! me!” he punctuates each word with a thrust deep into your womb, hell-bent on breeding you. 

♡ ┆ it’s not long before stars crowd around your eyes as you two climax together with your own loud moans, his semen flooding the depths of your warmth while your own cum coats his cock and drips down to his balls. your milk drips down your breasts again, and even though kylar is weak, he still manages to find it in himself to lick it up. as you catch your breaths, you two giggle conspiratorially, pressing your foreheads together and exchanging words of pure love and affection for one another… right before going back in for another round. you two rented out this room for an extended period of time, after all.

♡ ┆ now kylar takes whatever opportunity he can to bite and suck on your precious chest, pulling you in school closets or dark alleyways just so he can have a taste of your milk.

♡ ┆ ofc it’s not long until you both rent out a room at the hotel again, you going along with one of his crazy hentai recreations. it ends up with him on your lap and you, jerking off his sensitive cock, rubbing his pre-cum all over his shaft as he has his fill of your milk.

[conceptofjoy]

how do u imagine the Dynamic between dave and davepeta postgame. ik ur more of a dsprite fan than dp but i think it could/would be Very fascinating. plays a role in cracking daves eggy loking thign

i love both very dearly :) i draw dsprite a lot more partly bc of the self imposed sprite rules i made for my pc au. seb’s an exception, lets just say some kind of splinter bullshit happened lol.

pre retcon dave had that convo w jade abt ds. the way he talked abt him’s can be easily summarized by saing “hes me when it’s beneficial and not me when it makes me uncomfortable/ makes me need to confront some things.”

he’d totally just compartmentalize any interactions in that way lmfao. oh so youre a catbird sprite thing? alright im an ally do your thing bro i mean they. nepeta’s side of things wants to just PRY him open and the dave side’s like this is going to be so much fun. dps wants to fuck with him SOOO badly but also doesnt want him to run away from the egg crackification process. dave keeps avoiding dps not so casually but jade keeps looking at him disappointedly so they have to hang out. jade knows that theyre pulling something’s so tells dps to ease up on dave but thats literally an impossible ask.

dps explains some stuff about the gender thing bc dave is only casually interested. totally.

DAVE: so like a boy and a girl came together to make a nonbinary person?

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B//< ummm

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< something like that!

DAVE: i dunno it seems pretty clear cut

DAVE: oh shit unless the bird also had some kinda bird gender and shook things up

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: >B33< yeah i had to do all kinds of gender maths as soon as i came into existence

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< did you know bird gender and cat gender cancel each other out?

DAVE: no shit?

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< no that was a joke dump ass!

DAVE: i knew that

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< sure

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< well i dont think the bird had anything to do with the gender maths. or the sword

DAVE: sword gender…

DAVE: wait wasnt the bird a mama bird?

DAVE: seemed pretty intent on keeping our game egg to herself remember?

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B00< ohhh yeah

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< my bad

DAVE: you remember being a bird???

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< no comment

DAVE: oh shit thats not very dave of you

DAVE: any dave i know would jump right into a whole spiel about how tough life is as a single bird mom

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: >B33< well dave thats because… im not you!

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< we went over this before! lets go back to the gender thing

DAVE: yeah yeah

DAVE: ok gender

DAVE: so a human boy a troll girl a bird mom and a sword walk into two kernel sprites

DAVE: wait shit do the kernel sprite have genders too?

DAVE: kernel gend-

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: XOO< holy shit i think i get what equius went through

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< do you see what youre doing to me dave? youre making me sympathize with a sweaty and incredibly silly 13 year old troll boy

DAVE: haha youre funny as shit

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< thank you

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< yeah while the other components probably added some other gender stuff

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< it was mostly dave and nepeta’s gender that influenced mine

DAVE: yeah alright

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< like nepeta for example

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< grew up away from society and barely had to deal with the caste system

DAVE: sure

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< theres specifc roles assigned to each gender and caste but nepeta just didnt get the memo

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< despite the friend group being a pretty non hemoist

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B??< hemoist?

DAVE: sure hemoist

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< well despite the group being all “who gives a crap about your blood color and gender”

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< nepeta still felt like there was just something no one decided to tell him that dictated every interaction he had with everyone else

DAVE: yeah i totally get tha-

DAVE: wait “him”?

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< …

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: ‘833< what?

DAVE: wait was nepeta a boy???

DAVE: oh shit how did no one ever correct me this whole time-

DAVE: no wait pause

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: ‘B33< paws

DAVE: paws

DAVE: no stop that

DAVE: if nepeta’s a boy and im a boy…

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: ‘B33< …

DAVE: were you lying about the bird gender thing or???

DAVEPETASPRITE^2:

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< yes dave. i really am part boy gender and part bird mom gender

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< *SIGH* i think thats enough for today. i tried my best

DAVE: huh?

[obsessivestar]

'What If It's All A RomCom?' - a Ted Nivison x Reader

{{-I've really been looking forward to writing this chapter purely because I fucking love writing dialog and I love the dynamic I've developed with the reader (y'all) and the Chuckle boys lmao. Also did you know those 3 pictures are from 3 separate episodes lololol the effort I put for you guys ♡ -}}

//General Warnings: 18+ Fic (Minors dni), Reader is implied to be afab and under 5'5 n born in Canada ig

Chapter Warnings: Lots of swearing, yelling and playful insults (most if not all from Schlatt), Tucker is there too :^)). Implied drug use.\\

Word Count: 3.1k

☆▪︎▪︎▪︎Taglist!▪︎▪︎▪︎☆

@k-k0129 , @callsign-scully & @limecorpse

☆Love Ya To Death!☆

Chapter 13: Welcome To Chuckle Sandwhich.

After my...eccentric opening, I decide to move into Ted's room to continue the podcast, briefly going back into my room while the intro played to get my headphones before returning to his to plug them into his PC, making sure we could both hear everything. Once the intro was over, Ted and Schlatt officially announced me as today's guest, getting me to say a little about myself and my YouTube channel. It felt weird talking all...officially about myself and my content around Ted. I had forgotten that we were kinda in the same YouTube content circle. I didn't really see him as 'Ted Nivison, the youtuber'. He was just...Ted. My Ted. Still, I sorta had to act like he wasn't. I had to be casual with it, bicker with him without sounding flirty. It was odd to get used to, at least at first.

"Hey, so, funny thing about this, actually; about you being here.." Ted moved his chair in more so he was closer to the mic, smirking over at me. "Tucker kinda loves you, dude. He was tellin' me earlier."

"Okay, that is not--" Tucker's tone is immediately defensive, getting cut off by explosive laughter from Schlatt. "That is not what I said in the slightest, to be clear."

"That is what you said! I have the messages!" Ted chuckled, nodding over at his screen.

"I didn't know about this! What have you been sayin' Tucker?" Schlatt laughs out, leaning closer to his PC.

"I said that I was excited to have her because I loved her content!" Tucker got louder, trying to drown out Schlatt's laughing. "I wasn't confessing my love!"

"You literally said 'I love her and her content, I'm into this.'" Ted clarified, looking down at some discord messages on his phone. I glance at his phone, seeing a bit of what the full conversation was actually about. Ted made it sound like this was related to the podcast, but it wasn't. Their conversation was about my relationship with Ted. Tucker was giving his blessing, in a way. I look at Ted with a warm, knowing smile as he sets his phone back down on the desk. He gives me a brief smile in return before returning his attention to the podcast.

"Okay, well It wasn't a secret confession or anything." Tucker chuckled and shrugged a bit, his hand resting back on his desk.

"Hey, y'know what, we've all been waitin' to have (Y/N) on the podcast." Schlatt smirked, adjusting his headphones over his hoodie. "Y'know I've been trying to reach you for, like, a year?"

"Yeah I know, Ted was tellin' me." I nodded, giving a sheepish smile. "I stopped using Twitter around the time you would've reached out, I'm sorry..."

"What I don't understand is why didn't you just..." Ted pauses, addressing Schlatt. "...try to reach them on a different platform."

"I didn't have another fuckin' platform to reach her on!" Schlatt replied, getting defensively loud as usual.

"You have Instagram! She has Instagram!"

"I stopped using Instagram like a year ago! You know this!"

"What about a business email or somethin'? She--"

"Why didn't YOU try her fuckin' Instagram?"

"I wasn't followin' her a year ago, dude!"

"You fuckin' knew we wanted her on here, Ted!"

"Yeah, but you didn't tell me to try n' reach out!"

"This is YOUR FUCKIN' PODCAST TOO! What do you MEAN??"

Tucker and I are just listening to Ted and Schlatt bicker back and forth. I lean my head back a bit to laugh when Schlatt starts to get worked up. Tucker is smirking with his arms crossed in front of his chest, like he puts up with this every single day. "Honestly, Schlatt seems way more worked up about this than you claimed I was." Tucker chimed in when he got the chance, his eyes glancing along his computer screen.

"Ted's actin' like he was INCAPABLE of talkin' to her!" Schlatt continued to speak loudly, gesturing his hand out to emphasize his point. "He owns HALF of the podcast! It's half of HIS JOB to get the guests too!"

"Well I got her, didn't I?? She's right here!" Ted gets loud as well, gesturing his hands over to me as he gets closer to the mic. "We've been working together for like a week now! I got her!" Ted gently grabs my arm, shaking me a little to emphasize his point. I let out a laugh and pry him off, shaking my head at him.

"Ok but did she actually ask to be in an episode?" Schlatt nearly cuts Ted off to ask. "Or did you man the fuck up and actually ask her?"

"No no, he asked me." I answered for Ted, a little chuckle leaving at how almost angry Schlatt seemed. "He asked me this morning, actually."

"Ok, good. Fucking finally.." Schlatt let out a huff, leaning back against his chair.

"So what exactly are you guys doing up there?" Tucker decided to change the subject, a friendly smirk on his face. "How did this little collab come to be?"

"We're helping Tanner with his short film. Its a Romcom about two out of college kids enjoying their last summer together." Ted answered first, resting one of his elbows on his desk. "I stepped in for their friend Conner when he didn't show up on the first day. He was supposed to be the lead, now I am."

"Yeah, I thought you were just fuckin' helpin' him film. Now he's got you acting?" Schlatt asked, his demeanor becoming almost instantly calmer. "What exactly happened?"

"Conner ate some bad chicken the night before, so he was basically stuck to his toilet for a few hours." I answered with a humorous smirk. "Tanner and I didn't find out about it until after an hour of getting here, and we were on the road for, like, 3 hours."

"You didn't drive here from Washington, did you?" Tucker asked with a confused smile.

"No, Tanner lives nearby though." I nod at the screen with a friendly smile. "I'd been with him the last few days so we could drive up together."

"So if Conner hadn't fucked around with some bad chicken, this episode might not've happened." Schlatt spoke up with a knowing smirk on his face. I could tell Schlatt wanted to say more. I could almost hear it.

'And you two wouldn't of met.'

Ted looked at me briefly, his eyes flicking down to my lips before giving me a genuine smile as Tucker and Schlatt speak to each other a bit more. I return with a warm gaze before bringing my attention back to the podcast. I knew little glances like that wouldn't be put in. They only show what's going on with a particular person when their speaking. The only things we need to be careful with are flirting and touching.

"So you're only in California for the shoot, then. Where are you based normally?" Tucker asked me, adjusting his Loons sweatshirt.

"She's Canadian, dude." Schlatt spoke out, shaking his head a little.

"Oh my god, don't fuckin' start this again--" I let out a laugh, scooting closer to the mic. "Don't start this again!"

"What?? I'm stating a fact!" Schlatt made his voice sound jokingly defensive, shrugging his arms out.

"Schlatt was absolutely railing on (Y/N) for being born in Canada before we started this." Tucker explained, shaking his head slightly.

"I was--I was fucking born--" I lean in closer to the mic, holding my hands out in front of me as I speak to emphasize my point, my pointer fingers touching my thumbs. "I was fucking born in Canada--"

"We were all born? The fuck?" Schlatt cuts me off, furrowing his brows at the screen.

"I--shut up! Let me finish!" I laugh, hearing Ted's deep chuckles as Schlatt and I once again go at each other's throats.

"No! You don't get to finish!"

"I'm finishing! Fuck you--I was born in Canada, I grew up--"

"Sayin 'I was fuckin' born', fuckin'--everyone was born, bitch! What do you mean???"

"Shut the fuck up! Shut the fuck up! shshshshshhhh--"

"Don't shush me! This is my podcast!"

"I'm just gonna start talking over you because you're fuckin' annoying, bro--"

"DON'T even fucking TRY to talk over me! You Canadian's can't get loud enough!"

"I GREW UP in FUCKING WASHINGTON!"

"YOU'RE STILL CANADIAN."

"SURE, YEAH, THAT EXPLAINS WHY I'M SO FUCKING POLITE AND DON'T FUCKING INTERRUPT PEOPLE, SCHLATT."

"YEAH CAUSE YOUR PEOPLE ARE FUCKIN' PUSSYS!"

"You wanna talk about PUSSY? You ain't gonna come to fuckin'. L.A. and yell at me like that to MY FACE."

"Why the fuck would I want to goto L.A.!? Fly back up to New York and I'll fuckin' show you how loud I can get!"

"Back?! Back?! Wait! Waitwaitwaitwaitwait--"

At this point, Ted and Tucker are just sitting back, chuckling and trying to talk to each other through our spat. I lean back a bit in my seat, holding my hands out as I speak.

"How the fuck did you know I was in New York for a bit?"

"I fucking looked at your Wikipedia! OH, ALSO, HOW--"

"YOU WIKIPEDIA'D ME?!"

"HOW DO YOU--"

"YOU FUCKING GOOGLED ME??"

"HOW DO YOU HAVE A WIKIPEDIA AND I DON'T?!"

"PROBABLY BECAUSE YOU'RE FUCKING BORING, SCHLATT!"

Ted and Tucker were an absolute laughing mess at this rate. Ted has to keep himself stable in his chair, his glasses on the desk because he was wiping his eyes. Tucker had been laughing so hard that we all watched him fall off his chair, cutting off the entire argument when we all started laughing.

"Audio--Audio listeners, love ya to death, Tucker just fell out of his fucking chair!" Ted laughed, carefully putting his glasses back on with a few more chuckles. We all watch as Tucker climbs back into his chair, still cackling to himself.

"Oh my god, this might be the best episode, holy shit." Tucker spoke out as he readjusted his seat, bringing his mic back down to his level with a big smile on his face.

"Yeah, this is definitely one of my favorites.." Schlatt agreed with a little nod, messing with his headphones again. "That was fucking hilarious."

The rest of the podcast goes about the same way, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Tucker and Schlatt asked more about the short film, we chatted more about my channel and how it grew, Schlatt tried to ask me his fabled 'Unlimited Bacon, no games' question which I jokingly refused to humor and we even talked about finding time to hang out after Ted and I were done filming. Knowing I could get along with some of Ted's best friends was an amazing feeling. I felt like I really belonged in this group. I mean, I was kind of part of it already, in a sense. I knew Eddy, Jakey, Danny, Kurtis and a ton of others in the same YouTube circle, but it seemed like Ted, Schlatt and Tucker were on the other side of bridge. It was nice to finally cross it, and I could tell Ted was happy, too. He was a lot more upbeat in this episode compared to the old ones I had watched from a month or so ago. If the episode wasn't only an hour long, the four of us could've gone on and on for hours, possibly the whole night, but we had to cut it eventually, though not before Schlatt and I went at it one last time.

"Can't wait for this episode to come out and get added to my Wikipedia." I jokingly mock Schlatt, leaning back in my chair with my arms crossed in front of my chest.

"Oh here we go again. Here we fucking go again.." Schlatt shook his head with a shit-eating grin, leaning back in his chair as well as if to mock me. "Going on about your fuckin' Wikipedia again?"

"Again? Again?? You brought it up first!" I let out a laugh and lean forward, taking the mic to move it closer to me.

"I can't fucking believe that you have a Wikipedia and I don't..."

"It's cause you're fuckin' boring, Schlatt."

"I have over 2 million more subscribers than you."

"You're just boring, bro. You're just not interesting."

"I literally reinvented Minecraft as a game on YouTube."

"And that would be a great thing to add to your Wikipedia, which I'm sure you'll have once you stop being boring."

"Whose podcast are you on, hm?"

"Ted's."

"Fuck you."

"See? That would be a great quote for the quote tab..."

"Fuck this."

"...If you had a Wikipedia page."

"Next time I see you, it's on sight."

"Love you too, Jay~"

"It's on fucking sight."

"Yknow what?"

"The second I see you."

"Yknow what?"

"What?"

"When I get to meet you."

"What is it?"

"I'm gonna give you a big hug.."

"....Okay, that's kinda sweet. I can't be mad at that."

"I'll even get Tucker to take a picture, so you'll finally have something interesting for your page."

"I hate everything you stand for."

I don't even have a clever response, I just start cackling, leaning my head back as I laugh. This is so fun.

"I've loved every second of this." Tucker grins, raising his brows up a bit.

"I'm--I'm fuckin' here too. Ted Nivison's here.." Ted raises his hand up, giving a dark little chuckle.

"I thought you were gonna say 'I'm fuckin' Ted Nivison.'" Tucker adds, crossing his arms again.

"I'm fuckin' Ted Nivison." Schlatt repeats with a little snicker.

Ha.

I'm fucking Ted Nivison.

After a few more thrown in jokes, we officially end the episode, a collective sigh of relief washing over all four of us. I didn't think running a podcast would be so tiring. It was probably all the yelling. Schlatt started to apologize and double-checked that I was OK, which I made sure to reassure him that I was more than fine, playfully making fun of him for being so worried, of course. Being a part of an episode was a lot of fun; hanging out with them in general was fun. I definitely wouldn't say no to being in another episode, which they were all happy to hear, Ted especially. After a brief discussion about where we may all want to meet up, we say our goodbyes and log off the Discord call. I stand up off of my chair to stretch out all my limbs with a satisfied groan, hearing Ted's chair creak back somewhat.

"Pretty sure, uhh..." Ted paused for a moment. I turn to him, seeing his light eyes glance over me with a smirk. "Pretty sure there's an entire section of that episode where I'm just...watchin' you."

I playfully roll my eyes, a little flirty grin spreading along my face. "Are you still thinkin' about me on your lap earlier?.." I ask, crossing my arms in front of my chest again.

"A little.." Ted admitted with a purr, standing up out of his chair with his eyes still locked on me. My head rises to meet his gaze has he stands up. I had nearly forgotten how tall he was...

"Well..." I glance away briefly, catching my lower lip between my teeth as I approach Ted, bringing my hands up to playfully pick at his white shirt. "Give me about an hour or so to shower...get settled into something comfy, and...maybe we can continue where we left off in my room?"

"Mmm..." Ted lets out a pleasent hum, his eyes flickering down to my lips. "I'd never say no to that.."

I lean up to plant a gentle kiss upon Ted's lips, but Ted wraps his hands around my waist and pulls me into a deeper, warmer kiss. A surprised moan leaves me, but as always, I melt into the kiss, bringing a hand up to cup his stubbled cheek. When we're alone, he's never satisfied with little pecks or anything quick, and I love it. He takes his time. He enjoys this, enjoys me.

Ted breaks the kiss with a pleased purr after a few moments, gazing down at me with a warm smile before giving me a playful little shove. "Go get cleaned up, princess.." Ted chuckles lowly, running his fingers through his tall hair. "Before I get bored and I'm tempted to join you.."

"You say that like it'd be a bad thing.." I purr back with a grin, turning away to leave the room.

"For you? Not at all.." Ted replies, slipping his hands into his pockets. "For everyone else that lives here? Kind of.."

I shoot Ted a flirty wave as I walk out his bedroom door, closing it for him before moving into my room to collect some pajamas.

Within the next hour, I take a shower and return to my room in my PJ's. I check any social media, making a post to tease my future appearance on Chuckle Sandwhich, and I wait.

And I wait and wait and wait...

Next thing I know, it's been another half an hour. Ted said he would've been here by now, it's been well over an hour. I know that I could text him, but, I mean, he's literally a room over. Surely he won't mind if I make an excuse and barge into his room for a change. I grab my phone off the charger and make sure my pajamas are at least covering...most bits, in case someone is in the hallway, then I leave my bedroom and move towards his. His door is closed, so I simply knock on it, softening my voice as I speak through it.

"Ted?" I speak, placing one of my palms flat on the door. I hear muffled coughing come from his room, the sounds of sheets shuffling around, and a quiet 'fuck' from Ted himself.

"Fuck, uhh, lost track of time. Sorry." Ted speaks out a little louder so I can hear him, sounding nervous. I raise a curious brow, taking in a breath to say something, but pausing when I catch a whiff of something. I don't recognize it at first, but it makes me a bit suspicious.

"Are you alright? Can I come in?.." I ask in a more concerned voice, anxiously wrapping my free hand around the doorknob.

"...Yeah, lemme just, uhh.." I hear Ted speak again, though he gets quieter and begins to speak in more of a mumble.

Well, that's enough for me.

As I slowly open this door, I put on a bright smile. He seems nervous about something so I want to make him feel better. "Would you believe me if I said Tanner was asleep in my--"

When I fully enter his room, I realize it's rather foggy in here.

Not foggy, necessarily...m

It's smoke.

Cannabis smoke.

...huh.

__________________________________

Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 (smut) || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10 (smut) || Chapter 11 || Chapter 12 || Chapter 14 (smut) || Chapter 15 ||

[stitchwraith-stingers]

if i had a nickle for every fop / pokemon related post i made id have 3, which isnt alot but its werid it happened thrice

anyways nerd instincts on, come with me i will show you what full pokemon teams i feel like the characters would have, making like 3 of them in the process lmaooo

ill try not to give many characters repeating mon's cuz it probably makes me look repetitive but whatever its ok only human kids sorryyyy, feel free to ask abt other characters ill try to think of something

timmy turner's family would be one of those people that own 6 magikarp that only know splash down random routes, well hes not good at all with battling and arceus knows with how many battles he keeps loosing at school theyll never evolve, yes hes tired of all the comparisons with his bidoof

he grows up to be a fairy elite four member in johto!!! he has 2 sylveons on his team

chloe carmicheal's ace would be her yamper! the team above is her casual / contests, the one below is for serious battles, her family does so much at the same time - breed pokemon, check their friendship, hunt shinies, are professors, are gym leaders, they want her to become a champion while never missing for contests and having to battle highly expirienced trainers isnt easy for her oof, she probably has aton of mons in her PC and does eventually become the champion of johto

chester mcbadbat, i dont think i need to elaborate

AJ's ace would be reuinclus, though he just owns a mew, and probably multible, because of him being involved in some way in project mewtwo, chespin is here just for casual companionship, probably owns more ghost types as time goes on and chestnaught is the official mascot of the galax insitute, which many people there are confused about

trixie tang would only ever show her ninetales at school to appease her "feminine and elegant" persona people see her as, she sides all her "badass" mon's but cares for them deeply inspite of it all, also with the added bonus of ninetales cursing you if you get too close or smth along the lines

tootie would only own these two, no one knows how she got them

remy buxaplenty is not interested in battling, but he does keep his persian with him wherever he goes, furfrou incase he needs to look richer, his furret looks oddly purple....

kevin crocker's ace would be murkrow! he kept his uncles espeon, cutiefly is from his grandma

for the ANW characters, im gonna go by a fun rule someone had left in the comments that i reallyyyy liked :3 - every student has atleast one fairy type

hazel wells' ace would be elmoga, as its been her best friend since she was young, her zorua is a close second though! she owns alot of ghost types since her father is a ghost type specialist in the elite four in unova (moms a bug type specialist), constantly worrying that she wont be as good as the others in battling even though her school isnt big on battling and more bonding with ur mon

jasmine tran's ace would be jigglypuff! however its not uncommon to see her walking around with her popplio outside its pokeball, the jigglypuff was a gift actually, alot of people say its like theyre made for eachother, for reasons probably not actually positive, joltik is there after fearless and uses it to prank others, tinyyyy...... her leafeon had only recently evolved

winn harper's ace would be alolan raichu! surfing is just water skateboarding, so raichu helps with some cool tricks on the playground, theyre also rlly close with their furfrou, who they constantly also dye their fur to match their hair, and also cuz i think theyre a dog person in general, one of the few kids in their school to have fully evolved pokemon since their parents are gym leaders, loves competitive battling!

jenkins' ace would be his deerling, autumn form specifically, he also owns a douduo! from his home region of ye olden kanto, just a normal type specialist, no big deal

the doe twins would own two umbreons, ones regular the other ones shiny, theyve also been gifted tatsugiri and dondozo from their father from his fisherman days back in paldea, though they never use those two outside of battles, double battlers and weridos

whispers fred's main would be an absol! quiet but gets the job done, he also probably thinks that in addition to predicting natural disasters that his absol can sense mythical mons (which doesnt work that way, dont tell him), whismur helps him on the job, along with being a shiny he came across one day!, his slowpoke, ralts and eevee are there for emotional support, doesnt like to battle, probably thinks shiny pokemon are supernatural and brags about his whismur

dev dimmadome i like to imagine doesnt really own a pokemon of his own, they usually just breed and sell them off so he doesnt get to bond with them enough nor has he though about it, but during the battle of the big wand he gets them from foop, he and hazel have this grand battle (emolga probably does some thunder armor bullshit), the buneary refuses to evolve and admitibly doesnt like him, may or may not join hazels team instead and may or may not symbolise their relationship idk idk

[wooahaes]

before i know it, the me of today hopes for the you of tomorrow

pairing: non-idol!wonwoo x fem!reader

genre: fluff

word count: ~0.7k

warnings: one mention that pins down readers birthday as being a summer birthday. but mostly its just sappy, loving wonwoo.

daisy’s notes: he is boyfie shaped fr........ i will b thinking abt him forever

Wonwoo had a soft spot for the nights where you fell asleep in his lap while he was gaming.

Most of the time, it was because you hated going to bed alone unless you had to. You’d always been the more openly affectionate one in your relationship, and you’d told him outright one day (long after moving in together) that it felt weird to not fall asleep snuggled up close to him. So you’d come into the living room to where he was playing online with his friends on a game system rather than his PC, and you’d lay your head in his lap and watch... until you inevitably fell asleep every single time. He’d asked about it once, and you did have to confess that you didn’t intend to fall asleep. You just wanted to stay close with him until he was done, but the sound of his breathing was calming (even if the occasional things he said weren’t), and usually you ended up dozing off by accident.

Tonight was no different. He had his headset on, controller in hand, and your head using his lap as a pillow. Seungcheol was saying something about his plans to get in and play later this week when Wonwoo starting keeping an eye on the time. The clock ticked over to midnight, and he let out a quiet sigh as he waited for Seungcheol to finish speaking. The moment he did, he spoke up and said he was going to get off for the night.

“I‘ll see you tomorrow,” he said as he started to disconnect.

Only to hear Seungcheol’s quiet ‘tch.’ “We all know you took off today for her. You don’t have to hide it.”

Wonwoo smiled to himself. “That’s why I said I’d see you tomorrow.” Before he bid his farewell and disconnected from the game.

It was only light teasing, and it left him with a lovestruck smile on his face as he looked down at you. He reached out, fingers grazing the side of your face for a moment before he turned off the console. He’d plug in his controller in a few minutes. For now, he was going to admire you for a little longer...

Only for you to stir, finally looking up at him after glancing back at the TV. “You’re done?” Then you sat up, stifling a small yawn. “You didn’t play long...”

“That’s okay,” he said, reaching for the remote. He clicked the TV off, before turning to you. “I’m all yours for the next twenty-four hours.”

The way your brows had drawn together in slight confusion only made him smile. Being able to vex your brain and surprise you like this always made him happy, and maybe he had taken advantage of your sleepy state to be able to do it. He nodded toward the clock, and watched as you put the puzzle pieces together mentally before realization struck.

“Wonwoo--”

He had already slid a little closer to you, pulling you in for a soft kiss. “Happy birthday, my love,” he said as he leaned back, casually dropping the term of endearment just to see you smile. “Whatever you want to do today, I’ll do it.”

You didn’t have plans. Wonwoo knew you didn’t have plans, too. But the fact that he had cleared everything today in order to give you his full attention was sweet, considering he knew that you were used to people being too busy (or on vacation--the pains of a summer birthday) around your birthday. And of course it would be Wonwoo who knew that and found a way to say, without saying it, that he was there for you. That he’d always find time for you.

Maybe the sentiment would make you cry later... but for now you just leaned in to kiss him one more time before going to bed. The two of you could figure out plans when you woke up later. For now, you just wanted to cuddle with him and think vaguely about how you would spend the day with your beloved.

taglist: @twancingyunhao​ @wonuziex​ @synthetickitsune​ @cinnamoroxie​

[fantastic-bby]

Pairing: Reader x Yunho

Word count: 896

Genre: Fluff | Slice of life | Non-idol AU

Your casual relationship with Yunho is more comfortable than you thought

Warnings: Implied sex | Implied alcohol | Mentions of pegging

Masterlist

[3:09]

“Are you serious?” you laugh when you sit up. 

“What?” Yunho glances at you with the corners of his lips lifted slightly.  His attention is quickly brought back to his PC when he hears the game loading up. 

“Is this what you do with all of your fuck buddies?” you joke as you slip your hoodie over your head. 

“Nah,” he hums, “you’re the only one I’m comfortable enough to actually keep in my room overnight.” 

“Aww, how sweet,” you say teasingly, climbing out of bed and dragging yourself over to Yunho’s desk where you stand behind his chair as your arms sling around his neck. 

You’ve known each other for a few months. Your friend circles kinda overlap with the help of Wooyung—who has almost a billion more circles than you and Yunho combined—and you were only ‘just friends’ until one fateful night on a trip with your friends where you were both forced to share a bedroom after Wooyoung had passed out drunk in the living room while the only other two bedrooms that were open had been a little too occupied by your friends for either of you to want to be in. 

Despite the option of the living room floor being open, Yunho felt bad and tried to get you to switch. 

Which only made you feel bad, so somehow the option of sharing the same bed seemed to be the best one.

And when you’re both so close to each other, one thing led to another, which then led to you two fucking until the sun rose. 

It’s become a regular occurrence for either of you to be in each others’ apartments, but tonight, you find yourself watching as Yunho starts up his game right after trying to rearrange your insides. 

“Hm, if you’re hungry, I have some leftovers from dinner,” Yunho says as he raises his head to look you in the eyes. 

“Oh?” 

He nods and turns his head back down to face his monitor just as the match starts. 

“It’s just—uhm—chicken fried rice. I was too lazy to actually make anything else.” His voice slowly turns into a mutter the more he focuses. “Felt like I was wasting money on food, so I learned how to cook.” 

“Did you?” You let out an exaggerated gasp and lean back, smiling slightly in surprise. “And I thought Jeong Yunho refused to learn how to cook because daddy’s always putting money in your account.” 

“Yeah, then I realised that I liked the idea of being a male wife,” Yunho snorts. 

“I never pegged you as the domestic kind,” you comment as you make your way to the fridge of his little studio apartment. 

“Uhh, you have pegged me, in fact, but yeah. Neither did I,” he laughs. You laugh as well, opening the door and pulling out the first container that looks like there’s rice inside. 

“I’ll heat some up for you, too.” 

Yunho hums back an ‘okay’, but doesn’t fully turn to look at you. 

Silence fills the air, aside from the clicking from his mouse and keyboard and the sound of the game flowing out of his headphones that he’s moved to hang around his neck. 

There’s always been this unspoken comfort that the two of you share when you’re alone and neither you nor Yunho usually think about it. It’s familiar and it’s comfortable; vulnerable. Almost as if the both of you share the same understanding that this is a space that you need. 

So, you continue your synchronised movement as Yunho continues on with the match and you microwave his leftovers until you’re sitting at his tiny, squared, dining table and he finally stands with his headphones hanging off of the side of his black desk. 

He joins you almost wordlessly, the two of you eating ‘supper’ in silence while you scroll through Instagram and Yunho watches some videos on his phone. 

Only in this moment do you realise just how comfortable you are. Admittedly, you had stopped sleeping with other people after a few months of the ‘agreement’ that you had come to with Yunho, and it seems that—despite joking about his other buddies—he has, too. 

And you’d be lying if you said Yunho also exists as a reminder all over. The park hold ghosts of you and him running away from the swans, cafes; wisps of him handing you his black card to pay for whatever you wanted—you’ve been spending a lot of time together recently. 

Maybe your heart holds something else for him, you wonder for a moment. 

But you ignore the thought and return to your phone screen, scooping another spoonful of rice into your mouth as you find another reel that keeps you preoccupied. 

“Hey.” 

“Hmm?” 

“Wanna try dating?”

Movements halted, your eyes flit to meet Yunho’s and he’s staring at you with nothing but pure curiosity in his eyes. 

And… is that… adoration?

Admiration?

You feel shock running through your veins, but it’s not a bad feeling. Instead, you’re filled with a sense of warmth. 

And what you think you’ve completely missed is the fact that the conversation won’t make anything change because you and Yunho are already in this place. 

So, instead of any kind of uncertainty or fear, you feel like it’s… only natural. 

And you nod, “okay.”

Before you return to your own devices as usual. 

[finchyyy]

Finally someone who does girl group linksss,I would die for some ryujin eating reader out link or fic

Love yah❤️❤️

Warnings- Friend to lovers?, smut, fem x fem, late night study sessions. (let me know if i missed anything!!) a/n:SORRY I TOOK A LOT OF TIME (I was occupied with my studies T-T) This is my first time writing smut so I'm not sure if it came out good but i had a lot of fun while making this, love you&lt;333

Stress Reliver

You extended your arms as you got up from your seat. You had been sitting at that exact same spot for 4 hours—college was really getting stressful as it was the end of the first year. You kept on procrastinating and hurried to complete your work right before the due date, which was tomorrow.

You went to Ryujin's room to take a break from studying. After all, you were not a robot who could work for 10 hours nonstop. Knowing that you can spend hours with Ryujin without realizing it, you reminded yourself that it was just a 30-minute break. Nothing more.

You were met with Ryujin's surprised eyes as you opened the door. Her face looked graceful as the lighting from the PC in front of her reflected on it. "Why are you awake at this time? Ryujin curiously asked you as she gripped the controller harshly. "I was studying...for the past four hours. I decided to take a break.

Her eyebrows rose up as she heard your sentence. She diverted her attention to you and found the dark circles under your eyes. "Come here, y/n," she spoke as he patted her lap. It was a thing between the two of you—cuddles. You didn't know if it was normal for friends to casually cuddle, but it felt like a warm wind was reaching out to you and slowly sucking you in.

You nuzzled your neck in her hoddie, being greeted with a familiar strawberry scent. "I'm having such a bad day; my professor hates me with his whole heart." Ryujin started drawing circles on your knees. "Really?" "Yea,I wish this stress could go away." you jokingly said while looking at the older one. "What if I could take it away?" she teasingly said; however, you noticed her steal a glance at your lips. "How will you do that?" you genuinely asked. "Want me to show it to you? Ryujin replied as she fiddled with the hem of your shorts.

Getting the hint, you gave her a look of approval. It didn't take her a second to get on her knees while you were sitting on her gaming chair. Ryujin then took off your shorts and underwear in one motion. She teased your cilt by flicking it a few times, and you let out a whine. "Ryujin, stop teasing." She went closer to your pussy and pressed her lips against your skin. "Tell me, what do you want, darling?" Due to the vibration of her voice, you threw your head back. "Eat me out, please." Ryujin gladly accepted your request as she dug into your pussy.

To say that she was skilled was an understatement, especially with the way she used her tongue to suck your juices in. You moaned as she flicked her tongue against your core. Her next action made you throw your head back again . Noticing your body language, she asked, "Do you want to cum?" You rapidly nodded your head as she dug her nails into your thighs and licked you for the last time before you came. Ryujin looked up at you with a smirk and said, "We're extending the break, darling."

[tookerthetookiest]

Diluc x Reader

SAGAU - Self Aware Genshin AU (kinda??)

You were casually doing your daily's in Genshin Impact, but a weird quest you had never seen before appeared as your last one. It was near the gate area next to the Angel Share's Tavern. 'Weird, I don't remember ever seeing this commission before' you thought to yourself, but proceeded to do it anyway. When you teleported your way over to the area, not a single NPC was there, not even an enemy. Your PC/Mobile/Game Console was starting to run the game poorly so maybe that's why.

Finally an option came up to accept the quest from an NPC, but before said NPC could load in, if there even was one to begin with, you already clicked to accept it. Your screen turned black and you leaned in to get a closer look. Only to be sucked into your screen. Faint images flashed before your eyes, memories perhaps? Whatever they were, they stopped in an instant leaving you to drift off into a slumber.

Now onto Diluc, the owner of the Angel Share's Tavern and the largest wine industry in teyvat. Who also happened to live the life of a vigilante, moving in the shadows at night, protecting mondstat's citizens.

His nightly patrol was moving along splendidly, until he came across a figure cloaked in white, laying on the floor of the gate near to his tavern. Approaching with caution, he crept up to the figure. Upon closer inspection, it was a person, though a tall person. Like extremely tall. Near to them was a crown of sorts, more in the form of a halo.

He couldn't just leave them like this, it may pose as a threat in the future, who knows. Mustering all the strength he could, Diluc lifted the person and dragged them back to his mansion. The halo- crown came following after which rose his suspicions, who could this person be?

After a long journey, which would've been much easier if it weren't for your height, Diluc put you in a spare bedroom and chained your right hand to the bed so you won't escape if you were a threat.

You slept well into the afternoon that day, under the supervision of Diluc. The chains clinked, alerting diluc. He watched you with caution as you rose from your position while rubbing your eyes. "Who are you?" Diluc asked, alerting you as you were unaware he was there. "I..." Though you barely spoke a word, your voice already sounded calm and gentle, easing Diluc's nerves but he didn't let his guard down. "I am the creator of this land" you answered almost as if you don't know. In truth you actually didn't, you were doing dailys like 5 mins ago, now you're here.

"Creator? How am I supposed to believe them?" Diluc thought. "I don't really know how to get you to believe me honestly." You answered his thoughts. "How did you do that!?" Diluc said shocked. "Do what? I just heard what you said" you got a good look at him after you said that, he resembles Diluc but there's no way that could be possible.... Right?? "But I thought it I didn't say it" "Oh, weeelll does that prove I'm the creator??" He sighed, "Listen, until I get more proof that you are the 'creator' you're going to stay in this room." As he said that the shackles holding you simply fell off after you touched it while examining it. "Look! More proof!" You exclaimed. "Just.... Don't leave the room then i guess." He began to walk out the room until you spoke up "Wait, what's your name?" "Diluc Ragnvindr" With that he left, trusting you would stay.

Diluc????? FROM THE HIT GAME GENSHIN IMPACT???? Were you in Genshin??? How is that even possible? You sat there with your thoughts wondering how this happened. You began to realize it was all because of that quest you accepted but still, how? You began recalling the memories, you remember creating teyvat and everything on it, including the archons and the magic in this world. But you never did those, or maybe you did. Is this a dream or was the life you had before a dream? You continued to ponder late into the night, so late that you got to see Diluc walk home. You found comfort in knowing there are recognizable faces and people you could trust. Diluc made his way to your room to ensure you were still there and to his surprise you were.

He slowly began to trust you more as the days went by, talking to you whenever he had the time to, he found that to be the best part of his day. Though telling him that he was in a video game seemed like something you shouldn't do, it felt as though a balance would tip if you did. Soon you were given permission to explore the surrounding forrest though not to far so you wouldn't get lost. Everytime Diluc was away you would explore, none of the animals feared you and you even found out you could talk to them. One day you were playing around with your animal friends and lost track of time, huddling up together with them and falling asleep. Diluc searched the whole area for you when he didn't find you waiting for him like usual. When he found you he was so relieved but a bit concerned when he saw the wolves around you napping.

You enjoyed your time with the animals, but one day as you play with boars, you wandered closer and closer to springvale. Unknown to you, that was the day hunters came out to look for boars. Peacefully you ran about with the creatures you called friends when a screech of pain took you out of your leisurely trance. You hurried over to the boar that got caught in a trap, quickly releasing it with your strength. "I heard something get caught over there!" You heard in the distance. Healing the boar of its injuries you stood up searching to see where the shout came from. All the boars began telling you 'run! run! ' and so you did. You ran but the sounds of some boars getting shot down stopped you, you hide behind a tree and watched as the injured boars got tied up to be carried away. In ones final moments it told you to get away quick, though you have the power to help, you know better than to disrupt the natural way of life. So you ran again, but a hunter saw you some of them shouted 'look catch it!' but they couldn't catch up to you, your height gave you a big advantage. You ran all the way back to the winery, holding back tears for the loss of your friends.

Diluc came back ready to talk to you, his day was tiring and he desperately needed to hear your voice. Though his own stress disappeared when he heard your sobs. He had never seen you cry, you were always so calm and happy. He rushed over to you holding onto your arms "what happened!? What's wrong!?" "H-hunters killed my fr-friends" you cried. " Who were they. " He asked with rage, though he himself didn't know those creatures the sight of you this way filled him with rage. "Diluc please, i-it was just the way things must be, if i intervened it w-would not help anything. " He cooled down and just sat with you. You lost family before in the other world, this seemed to feel like the same thing." I know the feeling of loss... " Diluc began to tell you about his father and brother. You already knew though, so you kinda just sat there. You heard his lore so many times before at this point hearing someone say it back left you unfazed, but coming from him with the look of distraught on his face, you couldn't help but feel sorry for him.

The next day Diluc went to the tavern, the night went on as usual until some hunters came in talking about a figure dressed in white. He became suspicious and listened in on their conversation. "It was huge! Atleast 8ft tall!" The surrounding hunters gasped and asked for more information." It was in full white clothes! It looked so majestic!!" " Maybe it was hunting our boars, alot have gone missing recently. " Another hunter suggested." You may be right, we should capture it to make sure it isn't a threat. " Diluc was shocked, he wanted to argue with them, but that would cause a scene. He didn't want to put you in more danger, so he kept to himself.

He went straight to you that night, "You're no longer allowed to leave the winery" he said assertively. "And why not?" "Can't you read minds?" "Ugh, so what if hunters are after me, I can protect myself!" you defended. "I just don't want you getting hurt!" He retorted. That was the first time you fought. He got to annoyed of the arguing and simply got up and left. Leaving you pissed, maybe you should just leave, prove that you can indeed protect yourself.

The morning after, Diluc didn't even bother going into your room, not wanting to see you both argue again. Though if he did, he wouldn't have found you. You had left to go explore the wilderness, though trouble found you quicker than expected. Treasure horders, they were surrounding you "Hey aren't some hunters from springvale looking for a creature like that." One asked "Yup, and im sure they'll pay a hefty price for it, we'll probably make more money off of that thing than those boars." They moved closer to you, readying their weapons. You thought of a plans to escape, watching as one rushed forward. Blowing a gust of anemo his way, you took it as your chance to run. Before you could make it far, a treasure horder threw a bottle infused with pyro at your feet. With not enough time to react, you stepped in it, falling to the ground in the process. Healing the burn with hydro, you rose a wall of geo to protect yourself for a short time. One began pounding away at the wall with a hammer and almost got through.

You fought well into the afternoon, no matter now many of them you got rid of they just kept coming. You were growing tired, only putting up a sheild to protect yourself as you wait for someone to help you. Diluc finally decided enough was enough, he had to talk with you and atleast negotiate something. "Y/N, listen-" he opened the door to your room, quickly noticing you weren't there. "Y/N!" Shouting frantically as he searched around for you. Finally he realized you left, he wanted to believe you were safe, but he just had to find you. It was to late to get someone to help him, so he had to look for you alone. He ran through the forrest searching for any signs of you, even if just a strand of hair.

He almost gave up until he heard the sounds of treasure horders fighting something in the distance. Creeping up towards them, noticing they were surrounding something. The more he looked, he noticed a white robe and the halo- crown you wore. He finally found you! But not in the way he hoped, you looked worn out so he had to act fast. You were about to let your sheild down for your energy was just to low until a flame emerged from behind the treasure horders. While they were distracted you summoned a gust of wind to send them flying into the air, then escaping behind some bushes. You noticed a familiar mop of red hair, rushing through the treasure horders. Regaining some of your strength you ran towards him. He came looking for you and how glad were you that he did.

The treasure horders began to seem less and less but instead of fighting them to the very end, Diluc decided to take you and run back to the winery. "Y/N let's go!" He shouted to you, dashing into nearby bushes with you casting a wall of geo to block your escape. You both ran until you got the the winery, panting and gasping as you slowed down to catch your breath. "Are you ok?" Both of you asked at the same time, a small laugh erupting from you both. "I'm fine, I'm more worried about you though" Diluc said. "Don't worry, I'll be fine" Standing there, looking at eachother with fondness for one another. Diluc walked up to you and hugged you, sinking into your larger frame. You we're so comforting, so warm, he could surely get used to this feeling.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Finally my first fanfic of the year (even if it's pretty late). Its not really my favorite, there's alot that I just realized I could change, though I've been busy and I'm still very busy so I doubt I'll have time to fix it 😞.

Anyways, I'm open for requests! Send me any character along with what you want in your fanfic!

Have a good morning, evening or night! 🌃☀️🌅

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Finals

Propaganda

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

Young hot rocker dilf

Loyal to his dead wife <3

Does in fact smoke weed

BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)

His band was a Christmas cover band btw.

Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy

Anti government (ofc)

Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)

Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??

Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch

One incredibly buff arm

Has a pet rat named after his son <3

Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged

OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE

HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON

A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)

HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS

IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED

Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence

Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!

I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.

Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so

HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.

Glenn is the goofiest sexiest character there is and I will die on this hill! I will ride into battle for him! what Dndads created is truly unique and Glenn is a key part of that and for that he deserves to win. I said it before and I'll say it again - GLENN SWEEEEEP

Can we talk about how he says ‘baby’ casually? Like he just calls people that?? That’s HOT. THAT IS HOT!! He’s also bilingual and knows Japanese!!!! He’s a big dumb idiot with a lot of charisma!!!!!! HE WORKED AT A BDSM PLACE FOR TWO SEPARATE ONE SHOTS. HES SO SAD BUT PLAYS IT OFF LIKE HE’S CHILL ALL THE TIME!! HE DOESN’T THINK OF HIMSELF AS SINGLE BECAUSE HE DIDN’T DIVORCE HIS DEAD WIFE!!! He’s like.. the perfect guy. We need this win.

I’d also like to add the fact I made this. Which is the first 11 episodes edited to (almost) only have Glenn in them <3 which is a level of insanity I hope to reiterate. These took hours to make. I wouldn’t do that for anyone else.

vote Glenn I am asking with the biggest saddest eyes possible 🥺🥺🥺 he is so sexy it's pathetic and also so pathetic it's sexy, no I can not possibly adequately elaborate just trust me

Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.

Mod Note 2: This tournament is about fictional podcast characters. Please do not vote for the real actress Glenn Close.

Gable (Campaign: Skyjacks):

7ft tall silver-haired thembo of a fallen angel. was the literal sword of god until they killed him! reasons slightly unclear but probably sure to forbidden queer love! super caring for their friends. has one friend they have known for hundreds of years who they HATE but are bound to by the red string of fate. their sword is a part of them, they can sheathe it into a tattoo. they start out indistinct at the edges but as they have continued on through the campaign they have become more and more distinct. they became a flaming engine of justice to kill their friends shitheaded older brother who was following him. they have learned enough necromancy to allow other fallen angels to die, even though they typically cannot. they fly giant birds in to battle.

7ft tall beefcake wielding a sword as tall as they are. vengeful sweetheart

Imagine now: a fallen angel with beautiful gray hair and very big muscles. Now imagine them with a 9 ft sword. Now imagine them as a helmsperson of a pirate ship in a flowy deep-v pirate shirt. Now imagine they're dumb as a fucking rock. And finally, imagine that they killed god. Here, you have made Gable Skyjacks: sexiest podcast character of all time.

7ft tall nonbinary/genderfluid thembo fallen angel sky pirate who wields a buster sword. silvergrey hair with black/gold streaks as they regain feathers/memories of before their fall. back is covered in tattoos that hide the scars of their shredded off wings. killed God. toxic exes with lucifer. they are the keeper of several giant war birds who occasionally crave human flesh. they enjoy getting rowdy/smoking rope with their boys. they collect rocks that they think are neat. When anyone admits they are attracted to them, Gable trips over their words and absolutely swaglessly ends up sounding stupider and sexier by the end of the conversation; the will they/won't they and teasing they dish out to these (un?)lucky few is palpable. Sometimes the buster sword is on fire. They are immortal, they are cringe, they are trying to atone because they believe they are the reason the world is ruined.

Okay so aside from all of the above (giant with a matching giant flaming sword, killed god, extreme dumbass), here's some more propaganda for Gable the Godkiller.

They've escaped death multiple times with their partner in... crime? Like literally they were about to be executed in the most brutal way possible and just. Escaped and killed all their captors in the snowy wastelands.

They are the helmsperson of the Uhuru and take this job very seriously and definitely haven't left it to Bowser (you know, like from Mario) multiple times. Can steer that flying ship in horrible weather and still make it to port safely.

Healed an entire fucking hospital by cutting their hair for someone they had the hots for who was also in the hospital. Imagine being on that level of myth making in some random port city because of a hair cut.

Giant bird caretaker and also took the giant birds out on their friend's bachelor party (this was like. his Xth polyamorous marriage at this point btw) and had a fucking blast getting high on some rope and fucking around. They've also flown these birds into combat and looked cool as hell doing it (see: killing their friend's shithead of an older brother in a joust).

Had a relationship with Lucifer the Morning Star before they fell as an angel and killed God. Literally the reason the stars fell was their love for each other. The world would not look the same without Gable and they are, at the very least indirectly responsible for the creation of the Church of the Slain God and everything it represents (fantasy Catholicism).

And also yeah they are regularly tripping over themself and saying very silly things. 10/10 character we love Liz Anderson and Gable in this house

I am seeing people say that this Nicky fellow is basically trans! That's very cool! Gable is actually trans. Pronouns they/them/any presentation whatever they feel like.

Gable held a bachelor party for a BFF where the attendees hunted from their sky birds, wore dresses, and still managed to keep their eyeliner on point!

Gable killed God because he wouldn't let them be queer. They should rightfully crush anyone in their path.

We are finally going up against a character I know. I can confidently say all sexy moments with Gable are much sexier than TAZ's largely off-screen romances. Mod Note: This was written during the poll versus Killian Fangbattle.

But seriously. Listen to Gable's most recent introduction. Unparalleled sexy thembo introduction! Context: The Captain's Council is at a magical tattoo/piercing parlor (which has a lengthy form and disclosure process), trying to stay below the radar, and the Captain and Jonnit are pretending to be father/son to keep up the ruse. And to let Jonnit get a tattoo, since he's technically sort of underage. Bonus: Gable's decision at the tattoo/piercing parlor and noping out of Orimar and Jonnit's acting. (You should check out the full episode! Episode 197 starts a new arc and a good point to step into the series!)

Nicky Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

One armed half-demon man with a sword (also a Dedicated, Involved, Loving Father). (Specifically campaign 2, where he is an adult)

Transmasc bisexual (or at least so widely accepted as such it's basically canon) dilf half-demon let's start with the basics

And by half-demon I mean the literal prince of Hell

But also simultaneously is Saint Nicolas get you a man who can do both specifically this man

Missing an arm cause his ex-friends tragically betrayed him and shot it off but he doesn't need two arms to show you a good time wink wink ;)

The betrayal in question forced him to be seperated from his also hot milf voice actress wife and their son which is sad but in like a way that makes him sexier

Uses his one hand to wield a flaming katana that he used to rescue his son from the FBI

Protects his family with his life very literally which is hot as hell

Big himbo energy couldn't come up with a good plan if he used 100% of his brain

When he does fail at things it's pretty cute honestly

Definitely played a variety of musical instruments before the whole arm thing happened! Maybe he still does idk he's a sexy mystery

2 in 1 deal! This man was born from the merging of two timelines! Kinda sick!!! Also two dads = twice the daddy issues

You'd think the whole being forcibly split from his family thing would mean he isn't very close with his son but nope! His son adores him! They get along great!!!

His mom is simultaneously alive and dead

His mom bagged fucking two different dudes (one of whom FOUND HER DEAD in a different timeline, both of which are demons)

HIS MOMS NAME IS MORGAN FREEMAN, HIS DAD’S NAME IS GLENN CLOSE, AND HIS OTHER DAD’S NAME IS JODIE FOSTER, AND HIS GREAT SOMETHING GRANDFATHER’S NAME IS MERYL STREEP

HIS SONS NAME IS TAYLOR SWIFT

Lifelong pot smoker 👍 (plus drug flower user!!)

CANONICALLY BOTH A POLO WEARER (and yes, has all the stereotypes of that attached with it — a nerd, which is hot) AND A LEATHER JACKET WEARER (which also has all the stereotypes attached with it — a rebel dude person, which is also hot) [<- all widely accepted as canon by the fandom even as he’s older]

A part of the SECOND BIGGEST ship of season two, (Nark) despite the two characters only having one-two canon interactions (one of which JUST happened last episode)

Man’s a himbo what’s hotter than that

So many fucking names. You try to tag him in anything and he takes up half the space. That’s probably hot. For someone out there

This was already mentioned but so very very trans. Like. It’s basically canon

Rock and roll(er)

Joined a group of thieves called the watermice when he was like 13

for a few minutes had a guitar called the Battle Axe of Hatred

definitely had an frienimies with benefits relationship with his childhood friend Lark (sorry ppl that don’t ship nark lol) (it’s canon after ep 44 hah)

Nicky also acts like his sons Pokémon! Taylor tells his dad to do things, and Nicky does it without thinking about anything else he could do!

I feel like the audio of the entire Nick-breaking-into-the-FBI scene should be propaganda, but I'm copying select bits from the transcript:

Anthony: Yeah, it kind of echoes up through the vent, like the beginning of Metal Gear Solid. You hear a voice that strikes you as ever so slightly familiar, Taylor. Saying—  ??: [a deep voice] [echoing in the vent] Where is he?  Anthony: You hear—  Will: Uh-oh, he’s hot.  Anthony: —a bunch of shouting voices.  [giggles]  Beth: Uh-oh! Anthony: You hear a bunch of shouting voices and people shouting for him to get down on the ground to turn off his flame. To fucking get his hands behind his back. You hear this rhythmic stepping forward— because his footsteps don't sound like anybody else's because it's almost like… y’know when you toss a little bit of water onto a really hot pan and it just sizzles like that? It's like every footstep he's taking, you can hear that— Freddie: Cool  Anthony: — and you can feel some of that heat coming up in this vent, even though you can't see him at this point. And he goes—  ??: [echoing] Where. Is. My. Boy? Anthony: You hear the FBI agent—the FBI in quotation marks agent—in the back going like—  Agent: [echoing] He's safe for now. If you want to go ahead and make sure that he stays that way, you feel free to go ahead and step inside the suite that we've prepared for you, my boy. Anthony: And you hear the hot guy voice saying—  [chuckles]  The Hot Guy: [echoing] I don't think that's going to happen.

...

[a powerful rush of air builds] Anthony: You hear—  [gunfire, and the air rush culminates in a burst of flame; from underneath the fire, metal music starts playing] Anthony: —plumes of flame exploding.  [a person’s pained shout, gunfire and bursts of flame continue]  Anthony: You can feel the heat radiating through this metal vent and it's actually beginning to hurt and burn your hands.

...

Anthony: And you hear blood—  [sizzling]  Anthony: —hitting the fucking ground and you hear sizzling and things boiling and burning. Taylor: That could just be coffee! That could just be coffee. Link, let's go. Anthony: And you are getting closer and closer to the elevator. And you hear that same hot voice say—  The Hot Guy: [echoing] Where the hell is Taylor?

Gable and Nicky Together:

We are on a joint ticket now! This is a truly unbeatable combo. Not even god can nerf it because Gable killed him. Vote for us. Nicky Close will watch your stuff and play with your cats while Gable gives you the night of your life.

Gable and Nicky can literally be yuor angle or ur bevil.

Art of Gable and Nicky from @slightlyhopefulromantic.

[bubbleberryuniverse]

OKAY SOME OF YOU SEEMED INTERESTED IN TEMPORAL KO SO!!! EHEHE this is a shared/collab AU with @here-to-cause-suffering, we both made the AU together and are working on it together, it's both of our AU and doesn't belong to one of us more than the other!!!

ANYWAY IN SHORT THE AU IS LIKE... you know the song Time Machine by Miracle Musical, yeah? Alex and I's interpretation of the song is that the time machine breaks down while being used, between time and space. And the person is stuck in the space between time and space for eternity. And I fixated on this song so hard I noclipped through multiple walls to make this AU with Alex /j

OKAY SO IN VERY SIMPLE EXPLAINATIONS... KO is in a time machine. Dendy made it— reasons why are still pending! But the whole thing is that, yk, the time machine breaks down between time and space, and KO freaks out and brute forces his way out of the time machine and into the space between space and time and he gets Fucked Up Badly. And they can time travel! :)

He doesn't have a specific look to him— he's merged, yeah— BUT he looks like he does in the reference of him most of the time, because he has some degree of control over how he looks/what he looks like. There isn't a "true look" or "true form" to them, though— they can be KO, TKO, PKO, MKO, he can be ANYTHING and EVERYTHING, something and nothing— every age and no age simultaneously (will talk abt this!) he just simply is. He is as he was, and he was as he is.

When traveling between space and time/when they're in between space and time, he's all over the place in very many senses of the word, because it doesn't rlly have control over/can't rlly consciously choose to look like how it wants. So! Fun!

Ehehee, they also don't have a specific age technically— he can appear as any age and be any age BUT BUT when talking about it casually he's 13-14 bc that's how old it was when this all happened + that's how old it is when just looking like how it defaults to, yk!

ALSO CANDY GORE. and rainbow vomit. ALSO ALSO its breath is almost constantly foggy... and its body is slowly slowly deteriorating and he's kinda slowly becoming something that CAN handle being between space and time.

Extra details... they're almost always in some form of pain 😭 Esp when their body decides to just glitch and turn into, idk, a chair or a loading symbol or its head becomes a PC blue screen... whatever you can even think of! It's all canon (within reason/this extends as far as we say it does /hj)

Also the half of his face with the hair covering his eye is his skull— and it's not visible underneath, y'know, his sweater n' stuff, but some of his ribs are exposed/visible too and a lot of his spine, as well! I have some silly concept whiteboard doodles to share sometime that I need to make good use of 😭 /hj

EHEHEHE please feel free to send me or Alex asks abt this, we'd love to talk about them!!! He's so neat and so cool ehehe... look at him, baby boy baby.

[ohwell-itsme-but-danganronpa]

📒‼️‼️‼️

Warning: on PC it takes 8 lenghts of the screen to look through the entire draft, I think posts are a little wider, but still

So, this is something I'll never write out because it has the core elements of most of my daydreams: unrequited feelings for Kokichi, unnecessary martyrdom and overpowered self-insert original character

meet the Ultimate Manic Pixie Dream Girl, they were born out of my reading of the "Obligatory Chatfic", it stays focused on v3, but I wanted to play with the ideas of all the classes interacting together after going through their games in vr, and Hope's Peak having history of human experimentation on students, putting all of them through it so casually because They ARE The Bad Guys and have been doing this shit to students for decades like they're free lab rats

My OC joins the v3 class about a month or two after they left the simulation, bullshits something about special circumstances for transferring at that point, makes some suspiciously too accurate guesses about people, as if playing Sherlock Holmes, jokes about being a whore after revealing their talent, seems to be under the influence, but they say it's just jet-lag, they arrived freshly from America. And on the first lunch break they have an obnoxious reunion with Junko, they've partied together many times before, after clicking instantly on some formal fashion-related celebrity event. They throw an ice-breaker karaoke on the soonest free Friday evening to show the v3 babies how to party, at least the select few that decide to come (as most doesn't want to be anywhere near Junko or parties), notably, Kamukura is also there, he's always close to at least one of my two girlies. Generally, they make a big deal out of music, quote lyrics, assign people songs (a part of their "too accurate guesses" gimmick), make karaokes a regular thing, Junko rarely joins the later ones, it actually becomes a v3 class thing they wanted it to be in the end, but in the meantime they bring in various friends they make at HPA.

Their immediate & obvious crush on Ouma makes everyone cringe and brace themselves, thinking it'll crash and burn sooner rather than later as they'll get to see more of his personality, but they become friends, as our MPDG collects all outcasts and freaks of this school, but those who pay attention can tell they give extra attention to Kokichi, so those observant classmates (minus Saihara, who, of course, doesn't know) are waiting for them to realize that Kokichi is pining after Shuichi (but they know that, they knew from the start, they don't mind). They gush about him a lot, both to Junko and Izuru, sometimes to Miu, but as a running joke where she always reacts with fake gagging, highlighting how amazing it is that he doesn't want anything from them, that he makes them feel free (watch my aro ass re-invent being lithromantic on accident, I had this OC for... more than a year, and heard this term while having this in the draft). They spoil Ouma as their bestie, but since they're touchy with all their friends (and more touchy with people they want something from, using their talent to manipulate) and throw grand gestures left and right they play it off, even though their jealousy shows around Saihara sometimes. They have a brief phase where they took on an appearance that was just Saihara with their spice added (brighter hair, bolder make-up, expensive suit with suspenders... they disappeared for a bit after that stunt, equal parts ashamed and proud for pulling it off), they like intimidating him and asking him questions he doesn't know how to answer. They have mood swings between trying to wingman for saiou and antagonizing Shuichi, circling around him, during a particularly bad episode they decide to seduce him like everyone who stands in their way (even though they still wouldn't pursue Kokichi if he wasn't in the way).

As people start to notice they know too much to really be just analysing what they see & that they seem to grow lost in their increasing amount of notes (carrying a bunch of notebooks, recording their voice) and in their head (spacing out, repeating themselves, changing personas faster) they throw out pieces of their convoluted backstory to cause a distraction. How they ran away and don't talk to their mom. How their first heartbreak changed them. The many friends they lost in their time in Hollywood, not to mention partners, it's always others that the death touches so don't worry about them. Izuru gives them knowing side-glances and takes them on breaks, those two have Talks about life that tend to go nowhere. Sometimes Junko joins them and they only mean less and probably smoke. (I am super averse to smoking, but this one just has to, so yeah, the trio does). It's revealed that they are so close as a trio because they have a shared lab and work on something together (Enoshima technically has a second lab as a fashionista, but this is an analyst, MPDG & "Hope" lab). It also becomes known at that stage that they disappeared from Hollywood nearly a year before they officially joined HPA. They use Shuichi's curiosity about the matter to get closer to him & succeed in their goal.

The truth is they were originally offered to be the Ultimate Actress in Junko's year, but turned that down (important: they already knew Junko at that point) and got scouted again under a different name, from a school in some small town in another state after using that place as testing grounds for their plan, polishing their skills and purposefully pulling some shit to get scouted on their own terms. And it's pulled out of them in a full story instead of little hints by Kokichi, because (as he doesn't know what they did to Shuichi) they're best friends and he can't be easily distracted from warning signs that he knows from experience. They get him in on the plan to destroy Hope's Peak. Yes, they knew about the human experimentation before they came there, always hanging around older rich people with their "I'll fuck my way to the top" mentality allowed them to hear lots of stories from the prestigious world that are otherwise kept under wraps, and meeting Junko when she was recently scouted, looking into it and willing to talk about it solidified the idea they had about the place.

Even without knowing much they were growing convinced that the whole showbiz world is rotten to the core and Talent is a bad thing that burns you out, they watched people die chasing fame and ones becoming hollow once they got it, how everybody seems unhappy and only wants more of something, exactly just how fake all that jazz is. They make many comments about being expected to die young & beautiful, getting irrelevant if they don't, being special just because they're tragic, how being gifted fucks up kids, how this isn't designed for them but for people who watch them. They look at Hope's Peak and see what it symbolizes. And they want it gone.

So they say they accepted HPA's second scouting (without coming clear to them about the previous one being them as well), and became Ultimate MPDG, since they were late to join the class, their participation in this year's project was studying its events and assisting everyone's recovery with their talent. That is not the whole truth, just enough of it to make Kokichi think it is. The half-true reason for proceeding slowly with the plan to burn down the school is avoiding suspicion and making sure everything will go right. They don't buy big quantities of gasoline, not from one place, not with one face. They acquired the building plan and mapped out how the fire should spread. They collected the files with all the dirt on HPA. They arranged for a date when students won't be inside, when they will be at an event and therefore have alibis. They prepared their escape. It makes sense for Kokichi to believe that all the planning is what's wearing them down, he did think they had something in common there.

But they omitted that they enter virtual reality on a daily basis, that they die in it more often than not, that they're helping develop it and the main reason they were scouted this time was their ability to switch personas on a whim and become them, creating full lives as if they actually lived them and being able to contain those multitudes. They wanted to push that potential, to push the VR's limits and see how much it can manifest and how real it can feel. They're testing how it affects them, reducing the time needed to recover after a death, disconnecting from the body via replacing it with various avatars, separating it into elements that can be controlled & don't need to be in the same place or even present at all for other elements to work, turning sensations into sliding scales that can be manipulated. Junko and Izuru also enter the vr, usually there's one person observing from the outside and two in the simulator, but it's MPDG that took on the "effects of repeated deaths as time progresses" test, and it's eating away at them. They're losing touch, dissociating a lot, forgetting the boundaries of the real world and their mortality. And most importantly, that they've been doing it since before v3.

They've been at the academy since they got scouted, which not only wasn't late for the start of v3's first school year, it was late in the previous one, v3 applied some things they were testing out and when they found out it was happening they stormed headmaster's office and demanded to join their classes and oversee their recovery, because they were supposed to be the Head Researcher (it seemed beneficial to have them see it this way, who knew they'd be this bossy?) of this, and they were not done testing, so why the hell did you use this on a whole class of ultimates?! There are still things with defined plans of improvement, besides the applied features that might have side effects, months of work load on their project, this wasn't in their plans. Really, in the moment they might be more livid about it being outside their control, done without their knowledge, not to mention approval, one that they would not give.

Feeling for those inside comes with watching the footage. They're not a very empathetic person though, there certainly is sympathy, but that's mostly for the ones they grew to have positive opinions of. Now, unlike the real me, MPDG learned to hide their negative feelings quite well, they're used to acting nice with people they dislike, but that's when it aids their goal. They do not feel like they have to be nice to Momota, there's nothing they want from him, they're trying to get Maki and Shuichi away from him and his influence, actually. In a timeline that doesn't end in tragedy they could be convinced to give him a chance, get to know him for real, deal with the feeling of self-recognition through another (derogatory) and both of them would come out of it as better people, bickering in more friendly ways, helping keep each other's burst of righteous anger contained. But in the main-line, when MPDG holds back from punching him after blowing a fuse and ranting excessively in reaction to a comment he made during lunch, in front of everyone, they revel in the sense of superiority over him it gives them to come off cold in their hatred and don't resort to physical violence like he would, their next move is to pull strings to get him expelled, very satisfied with themselves, fully believing that somebody like him doesn't belong there. (elitarian, playing into the system, becoming the very thing they swore to destroy, etc; etc.)

Nothing quite like this, but they have issues getting along with a few others, get into arguments with Kaede despite trying to be friendly, they're uncomfortable around Gonta (oh, they despise feeling small and fragile, muscular men just so aren't their type, it's not a fear, it's not a fear, it's not- oh fuck, he could kill them on accident, what if he finds out they hate bugs?), and honestly they just find Korekiyo too much to unpack so they don't get in his business the way they love to do with most people.

When they can't drag it out any longer, their research is done, all information they wanted to sell is sold, everything is prepared to burn the school, the final karaoke is arranged and everyone but them and Izuru is at the venue, they finally set the flame, it's done. But the next step was to join others at the venue, have Izuru drive them there, swap places with their bodydouble, do a big reveal by showing them The MusicalTM (a movie they made mostly with the use of NWP, showing their story along with a very dramatic soundtrack, dancing performances included), give their friends the playlist they made for them and finally ask Kokichi to run away with them in a moment of having nothing to lose, leaving either way. That doesn't happen, because. Because their affair with Shuichi. No, the guilt isn't getting to them that much, maybe a little. They're pregnant and don't want anyone to know. It ruins their plan, so they choose to leave without saying anything, this way Kokichi won't hate them and at least saiou will have a chance. They sort of confess with a song in the musical, but they leave without goodbye, leaving him no way to reply. Telling Shuichi would only complicate things, since he's a good guy, who'd take responsibility and they don't want him.

Being a wanted criminal, they definitely leave Japan and live somewhere on the down low. They stop detoriating but the damage is already done, and they never rocover, so they're very scatterbrained and often dissociate til the end. Izuru also runs away and lives a quiet life. Junko gets arrested but gets out pretty quickly, she refused to help trask down MPDG or Izuru, but expressed certainity that neither of them will cause trouble again and proceeded to instead testify against HPA scientists, helped find people who were involved in the Kamukura project (they're not dead here, but if MPDG didn't show up with their dramatic ass plans, who knows what Junko & Izuru would have done on their own, it probably would be a lot closer to the Tragedy), used her Analyst talent to prevent some bigger terrorist attacks that would have hurt a lot of people (when theirs only destroyed the building and everything to do with NWP, except for the notes MPDG took with them. They considered selling the concept just like they did with other secrets, but even though they believe there could be better uses for it, it's too dangerous, so not a word of it gets out), she refuses to continue working with anti-terrorists later once she's not obligated to. Saiou get together and seem to have their happy ending, domestic ever after, except a few years later... a child shows up at their doorstep.

But that would be a sequel/an entirely separate thing, because it's just a little scenario I had, a maybe preteen-at-most weird girl shows up and flips their life upside down, MPDG left a will & letters in envelopes titled "Open when [specific situation that's kinda expected to happen happens, first one being "open when you've met her"]" and they're actually mostly adressed to Kokichi, some to Shuichi and some of the later ones are adressed to their daughter, set for birthdays and other big occassions. They always expected to die young and it never becomes evident or relevant how they died exactly, but there are things that could lead to it, like the damage from the NWP, their even older history with drugs, with dangerous people, their own mind becoming too restless after a few years of a peaceful and normal life, no matter how much they tried for their child, something was going to catch up to them, they were sure, so they were writing letters since they made their escape. All of that is not easy on saiou's relationship, but at this point they're either married or at least engaged, so it's not enough to tear them apart, once they calm down it's not like Shuichi did anything wrong by sleeping with MPDG months before they got together, frankly, he got played and Kokichi can recognize that. But the kid is there, and not only is Shuichi the closest & only* family (*technically, MPDG's parents are alive, but the link got lost a long thread of identities ago), but they're both written in the will to inherit everything, except for what they already put away on their daughter's savings account. So they're in for a ride.

[jq37]

It was a good first episode. There's always some growing pains before they lock down the dynamic, but this was a solid introduction to what's coming down the pipeline. Murph and Emily successfully broke my heart the most. One's marriage is crumbling and the other's just a really traumatized child. Lou and Ally character's are pretty great and seem to have the most plot going on ATM. That voice Lou's doing is such a choice. Zac and Siobhan need more time before we can fully sink our teeth in. PIB is entertaining, but that's all we got so far. And while I'm desperately trying to block out Siobhan's intro, beyond the stressful horror, Rosamund didn't give us a lot character wise. Looking forward to getting stressed out by the rest of the season.

I was a big fan of this first episode! There was a lot of interesting stuff intro'd with all the new PCs (and I really got a sense of like...Once Upon a Time but competent lol). I already went through my thoughts a bit in the recap for the week but here are some more casual thoughts on everyone.

(1) Rosamund: Roz seems to have retained a lot of her princess niceties and demeanor which is honestly impressive considering her entire Situation. I'm wondering if this is going to be a Ruby style arc where she turns jaded eventually or if she's just going be Like This the whole time. A sunshine-y character in a crapsack world is always an interesting contrast. Also, we kind of started and ended with her since Pinocchio was warned that someone was coming for her. I'm curious if the fairy who cursed her is the same fairy that Pinocchio met.

(2) Ger: Brennan does this really cool thing where the end of the world is happening but you're like, "Oh no! This character cheated on this other character!" The human drama stuff feels just as weighty and often more weighty than the life or death stuff. That's how I feel about Ger's whole situation. He's really a dude in need of some serious self-reflection and I'm charmed by how pathetic he is. The issues he's having with his wife are so grounded in reality, even though they involve conversations that start, "Remember who we started dating when I was a frog?" Can't wait to see more of him--and hopefully Elodie at some point too. Where is she Brennan???

(3) Tim: Once again, everything with the Gander is totally messed up. I really hate the idea of accidentally stumbling into a kind of eldritch pact. You're right that there's a very clear plot hook with him and his mission with the book. From the way it was framed, it almost seems like the book has the "correct" or at least more wholesome versions of the tales in it somehow. Or is a gateway to where those versions exist? Because Brennan said it was their town but without the flooding and Jack looked like how he "was meant to be" or something like that. A lot to think about.

(Sidenote: Me and my friend were joking about whether the bad guy this season was going to be capitalism, or the church and my halfway joking answer is capitalism in the form of some version of the Disney Corporation lol.)

(4) Puss: I don't have a lot to say about Puss that I haven't already said in my recap but I love Zac putting his all into his cat mannerisms and I really love this grounded look at what would actually happen after the Puss in Boots story. Looking forward to getting more info.

(5) Red: Yikesssssssssssssssssssss. Emily just went for the jugular right away, huh? As usual, no notes Ms. Axford. I think it's super cool they mixed the Red story and the Big Bad Wolf story. I wonder if/when we're going to get details on how it went down with her grandma because we never got that. I feel like Emily might steal the emotional killshot crown from Siobhan for me this season.

(6) Pinocchio: OK first of all, no one can say Lou doesn't commit to the bit. Second of all, as I said in my recap and at the top in Roz's section, there's clearly something afoot here. Why does Pinocchio’s stepmom want Roz kept safe? And who even is she? My pet theory (based on very little info to be fair) is that she's Cinderella herself somehow but she could very easily be lots of other people (one of the stepsisters is a guess I didn't mention in my recap). Clearly, we're missing a ton of puzzle pieces here so I'm eager to get more. Also, I’m gonna be so mad when Lou is having a super emotional scene and he’s talking Like That. You monster.

One last thing: I'm curious about the timeline here. Since Roz has been asleep for 100 years it seems, how does that slot in with everything else? How long has this plan involving her been in motion. If Sleeping Beauty happened 100 years ago, when did—for instance--the Cinderella story happen (if it happened)?

OK, that’s what I got. Looking forward to the next ep on Wed!