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#the waterworks started flowing and wouldn't stop
cobaltfluff · 2 years
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shovelling roast potatoes into my mouth as i ugly sob over the new nier ep
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How about headcanons for luci x reader and alastor x reader where they neglect reader and they have to fix it? I just need some fluffy diabetical sweet hurt-comfort xD if you could please 🙏 ☺️
WAP-BAP-BOOM ALAKAZAM here's a thing. I hope you don't mind I make it pre-relationship because I love me some pining
Lucifer x Reader, Alastor x Reader
Summary: Your friend has been avoiding you lately. You spiral and wonder what you did wrong.
Warnings: Anxiety go brrrrrr. Alastor is a low-key stalker, but not in a creepy way? more like a.... 'i adore you from afar' way. Luci disassociates hardcore. Reader does too.
ALASTOR
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Alastor started drifting away when he realized he enjoyed having you around
He couldn't find a twisted justification for it and he just couldn't handle it
He didn't want your soul, he had no real use for you, and yet he wanted you with him
So he pushed you away without much thought.
With no explanation to you, btw
Deer boy mcgee wouldn't be (intentionally) rude or hostile towards you, but certainly more aloof.
Conversations turned into curt greetings and goodbyes
Times spent lounging around in the same room turned into a little wave here and there
Attentive listening to your venting shifted to a 'Well that's not good. Tootaloo!' before he left
The guy didn't even ramble about HIS stuff with you anymore
It hurt.
You didn't know why he was suddenly so distant with you. But surely you did something WRONG, right?
You always do something wrong
So you just had to fix it. But you needed to find out what 'it' was
When you passed by him in the hallway one day, he gave his increasingly-common wave before waltzing right by you-
"Wait, Alastor?"
He glanced at you, tilting his head at an unnatural angle. His smile was too tight.
"Did I....Did I do something wrong?"
His eye twitched.
Absolutely not, he'd think. You could do no wrong in his eyes (though his ethics were slightly askew so that might not mean much)
But you looked absolutely distraught
You were trying to cover it up - you always do - but he could tell.
He watches you a lot
"Of course not, my dear!"
"...why are you avoiding me, then?"
...
Shit.
He didn't have a lie ready and his usual quick wit appears to have failed him
Looking at your eyes. Your lovely, currently tearing up eyes-
No no no no no
He turned his attention to you fully, gently cupping the side of your face in one hand.
"Oh, my dear, no need for the waterworks. You did nothing wrong, I assure you."
"Don't lie to me, please. just- just what did I do? I'll fix it..."
He'd typically murder someone for making you feel like this. However, he was the one making you feel like this so that complicated things.
He leaned down, gently kissing away the forming tears at the corner of your eye.
"Simply...sorting some things out, dearest. You did nothing wrong. I just... Need some space."
Why were you staring at him like that?
Did he say something cruel?
Why was your face such a bright red-
OH.
OH
OH
"Well, i best be off! Let's meet for tea later, yes?"
You numbly agreed and he quickly said another farewell before shadow-travelling to who-knows-where
You gently touched the cheek had had been so gently holding earlier, a small, giddy smile on your lips
"Something to sort out, huh?"
Well. You couldn't wait until he finished that up.
LUCIFER
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Lucifer had no intentions of being distant
Unfortunately...that just...kind of happens
Maybe that's why Lillith got sick of him
When you're older than all of humanity, time doesn't quite flow the same for him as it does for you.
Add his tendency to detach himself from everything and that gets even more complicated.
But he was doing so well for a while!
He'd leave his room often, he'd talk to Charlie and the other hotel-people, he'd like. Leave the building sometimes.
Maybe it was because he was doing so well that it seemed to you like he suddenly stopped caring.
Or maybe he was sick of you?
You could be pretty annoying sometimes...
You ramble and hyper-fixate and suck at emoting...
OH SHIT yeah he was...probably sick of you
Several days of being mopey later and Charlie ended up talking with you. When you told her what gives, she pretty much confirmed what you feared.
"AGH! He ALWAYS does this!"
"Hun, take a deep breath. Maybe something happened?" Vaggie said, putting a hand on her girlfriend's shoulder.
Charlie's words already had you spiraling.
He ALWAYS did this?
Was...Lucifer just like that?
Your Luci was like that?
Luckily Nifty happened by at that moment, sweeping up the floor with manic glee.
Her big ol' eye watched the scene and she casually stated
"His majesty hasn't moved for like, four days. I know, I dusted him. He's just staring at the wall like this."
Nifty made her eye go comically larger, mouth pressed into a firm frown. Then her usual expression popped back up and she went back to scrubbing everything.
"....oh." You murmured as Charlie was panicking and screaming how her father was dead.
Vaggie managed to calm her down enough for you to explain what disassociating was.
You had a good amount of experience with it
Charlie proceeded to put her face in her hands and feel horrible.
You went to comfort her, but Vaggie stopped you and motioned to the stairs with a tilt of her head.
Oh....Okay, she got the Charlie and you got the Luci
You scuttled away to Lucifer's room
Lo' and behold, the Nifty was correct.
Kind of.
He wasn't exactly sitting there staring at a wall, but he was hunched over his workdesk with his head in his arms.
You put a hand on his back, between his shoulder blades.
"You okay, Luci?"
It took him a moment to respond, but he did. Looking up at you with rather dull eyes.
Which suddenly turned comically large as he sprang up and flailed about, squishing your face between his hands.
His expression went from numb to panic to absolute rage in a span of a couple seconds and it was giving you whiplash.
"Who made you cry?" He growled..
Who...Oh
Oh yeah you were crying earlier
It was so horribly ironic you laughed, tears spilling down your cheeks. Luci blinked one eye at a time.
Adorable
You explained why you cried- that you thought he was sick of you.
He offered to punch himself in the face.
That made you laugh again and you hugged him without thinking, clinging onto the silly gnome-looking man like you'd be erased if you let go
He returned the gesture in kind.
Lucifer clung onto you, pressing his forehead between your neck and shoulder, laughing in shakey, watery breaths
"What are we even laughing about!?" You cackled, tears still rolling
"No idea but I needed it." Lucifer chuckled. He nuzzled your neck, his breath steadying.
"Thank you, starling." he really needed it.
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callibones · 2 months
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normally i feel completely sawed off from my pretransition self a lot of the time like i just crawled into a dead body and started it shaping into me. which is fun. but as i've gotten better at the piano i've gotten to play more and more of the dream songs ive been wanting to play since long before i was me.
i'm learning beethoven's pathetique first movement. the ultra famous one.
when i was a boy (was i a boy? i don't even know if i was me) and i was in third grade, i was very emotional. in music class, i couldn't listen to the pathetique without crying. as soon as i heard it i'd just start sobbing through those first few angry chords.
of course, i was mercilessly mocked for it. a boy crying at music class? the boring thing we all sit through and tolerate and hope it's boomwhacker day so we can do something besides listening to some ancient crusty classical music that sounds like cobwebs and dust? even the teacher was a bit exhausted by how dramatic my reaction was. this wasn't a few tears. i was full on sobbing and wailing, and each new melody the song brought made it worse.
one time, he asked me why, and i told him i felt so, so horrible for beethoven, who didn't get to hear that he'd made his masterpiece. he wrote such a wonderful piece and he didn't even know. and his friend, the story went, had to turn his head towards the applause for him to even know anyone had liked it. he wrote something frustrated and despondent and named it the pathetique, and thought he was suffering through it alone.
eventually, i learned to stop crying at the song. in 7th grade, after crying my way through elementary, i cried into middle school, and the mockery got worse because i was older, and i promised myself i'd never cry again. and i lost my tears.
i'd sawed off that part of me. i didn't listen to the pathetique.
i wouldn't regain the ability to cry, at all, ever, until six years passed and i started estradiol and the boy died and i came in to pick up the strings of the body he'd tried to neglect and rot so many times.
the first thing i did, as soon as i could, was cry at little things. stories i liked and beautiful days and friends' kind words all made me sob openly. i hear bets against the void now and every single time it makes the waterworks flow.
that was me. the new me. the me now. the girl in the boy's vessel. i cried at so many new things because i was alive and i was here and i wanted to feel everything and i wanted everyone around me to know it.
when i play the pathetique, though, the memories of my heart aching for beethoven and my sobs ruining 3rd grade music class feel unlike any other memory of the thing-that-i-am-not, because they're from my point of view.
i remember him.
he was alive and he was here and he wanted to feel everything and he wanted everyone around him to know it.
i made it home. he made it home. there was a symphony in him he couldn't hear, and it came out in angry sobs and too many tears until he tried to put it away.
and then we turned our head.
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esmedelacroix · 8 months
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5 days til' Christmas
in which the mood swings are swinging during your pregnancy with husband!miguel o'hara⋆꙳•̩̩͙❅̩̩͙‧͙ ‧͙̩̩͙❆ ͙͛ ˚₊⋆
6 days til' christmas ← previous part
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Waking up that morning it was the same routine of feeling discomfort and nausea. You thought maybe you would get used to it but that proved quite difficult the next morning as you were hurled over the toilet.
You felt bad waking Miguel so early in the morning but he insisted it was fine and he knew you needed him to be there for you. You were more than thankful to Miguel for taking his day off from work and starting his holiday vacation early for you.
Before you knew it, tears were streaming down your face. You were sobbing on your bathroom floor because you felt so loved by Miguel and that made you happy. "Hey, hey are you okay?" he asked as he directed all his attention to you and wiped your tears that wouldn't stop flowing.
"I'm just so happy you're here," you sobbed.
"Aw, mi vida[my life], have I been away for too long, have I been neglecting my wife?" he asked as he embraced you and caressed your hair.
"No, it's just," you started, you let out a frustrated shy you just couldn't stop your tears. "I'm just so content," you said.
That morning you and Miguel were eating breakfast together. He made his usual piping hot cup of black coffee(weirdo) and he was sipping it because it was still very hot. You hated that. You didn't know why. But it disgusted you.
"Why are you doing that?" you asked, knowing it was a completely normal thing he did all the time.
"Doing what?" he asked obliviously.
"The way you're drinking your coffee, It's weird, I hate that sound," you said, almost gagging when he did it again.
"It's still hot," he said blankly.
He sipped his coffee again and that's what set off the waterworks. You sobbed telling him that you hated the sound. "Just get out! Get out!" you said pointing at the door.
He put the newspaper down trying to remain calm and walked over to you slowly taking his glasses off. "Stop just stop! Why are you walking like that?" you sobbed as you ran into your shared bedroom, locked the door, and wailed.
You heard Miguel's heavy footsteps he was probably pacing back and forth worried and trying to figure out what to do. After a while, when you had stopped crying you heard soft knocks on the door. "Nena[baby], can I come in?" you heard Miguel ask in a soft tone of voice.
He didn't hear a response but the door opened and he saw you there with red, puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks. "Hey, I'm sorry for sipping weirdly I guess," he said, taking both of your hands.
"No it's not your fault," you said quietly looking down ashamed that you blew up on him over him drinking his coffee.
"Why did the coffee and my walking make you so upset?" he asked
"I literally don't know," you sobbed the tears spilling again.
"Okay, shhhh, you’re fine you're okay, hey, please don't cry," he said, wiping your tears away and hugging you.
"Sorry I'm so hormonal, probably just starting my period soon," you said resting your head against his head.
Thinking that it would be easy to hide your pregnancy from Miguel was so wrong. Your symptoms were flaring up and guilt from lying to him was eating you alive.
You hoped that nothing crazy would happen for the rest of the day. Other than being sick and eating and drinking a lot more than you usually did, everything was fine.
Until that same night, you and Miguel ordered pizza and he folded it. Miguel. Folded. His. Fucking. Pizza.
You did end up crying again, locking yourself in your room threatening to divorce him if he even tried to talk to you. He did sleep on the couch that night. But hey it was only 4 more days until you could finally surprise him on Christmas day.
. . .
next part → 4 days til' Christmas
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taglist: @aripet22@to-the-endoftheline
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kennyfightme · 1 year
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Pink in the Night
CW- Severe depression, Gaslighting, Not fully edited I'm so tired guys, Clyde
Words- 1.1k
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Theo laid on his back, staring up at the shadow covered ceiling. His curtains blocked all of the sun out. In his brain, he knew he should push them to the side to let at least some sunlight in but…He couldn't force himself to. No matter what he did, no matter how hard he tried he just couldn't move.
South Park AM played quietly in the background. God…Would they just shut up already? This episode was going on too long, he couldn't take it. Evertime Kenny spoke, Theo wanted to scream. A pit of anger sat deep in his stomach. Everything had been making him angry lately. Silence, Noise, harmless jokes that would have made him burst out laughing before made him get defensive and angry. Maybe that was why his body shut down. Knowing he was going to, that he already had, hurt his friends made him realize what he had to do. Shut himself in. It was the only safe option, for everyone. Besides, weren't they sick of hearing his voice? His stupid comments, his unfunny jokes. He was sick of hearing them.
Theo turned his head, trying to focus his eyes on his phone but the absence of light didn't really do much to help. The phone was facing down, but there was a soft glow under it. It was buzzing like crazy… Suddenly his ringer went off. A deep and raspy groan escaped his chapped, untaken care of lips.
“Shut up…” After what Theo perceived as forever, the phone finally went silent. A wave of relief flowed through the small boys body. Finally. However, that didn't last long. His doorbell went off. Only once at first, and then five or so minutes of silence. After those five minutes were up, whoever was at his door started to spam it. Aggressively. Theo laid with his face shoved into his pillow. It wasn't going to stop. The smaller boy did his best to roll off the bed, ending up laying on the floor. Thank god he didn't have a bed frame. Theo sat up slowly, and used the floor to push himself up off the bed. The doorbell kept going. Leaving his room, Theo shouted “Im coming!! Jesus fucking christ!!”
Before he even got to the door, it swung open. His eyes widened and anger filled his body, hands shaking. “What are you doing here…”
Clyde stood in the doorframe, grinning. “I had to find your spare key, why didn't you let me in…Oh you look like trash!” Theo grit his teeth, balling his hands into his fists. It was taking everything in him to not immediately scream at Clyde. He tore Theos' life apart. Ripped his heart into shreds, and then has the audacity to just show up like nothing happened? “Oh well, anyway. Sit down with me!! I gotta talk to you about something.” Clyde shoved his way into the house, and plopped down onto his friend's couch, Theo gently sat, already wanting Clyde to leave. The younger boy picked at his pants, looking down. “So…We need to talk about something.” Theo stayed silent, refusing to speak. He couldn't speak, knowing if he did it wouldn't turn out well.
“You’re acting so weird…Uhm..Anyway. I have plans with Y/N soon. I wanna know some of the stuff she likes so I can make our date super super special!!” Oh. Theos breath caught in his throat, staying stuck there. Clyde…Came by to ask that? After everything. Theo ghosted Clyde, refusing to speak to him and he just showed up without warning? To ask about a date with his boss? “Theooo. Are you just gonna stare at the floor and not say anything?”
“What's wrong with you…” Tears filled in Theos eyes, dropping onto the pants he had been wearing for the past few days.
“What? What's your problem man?” Clyde looked over to Theo and groaned. The waterworks again. He couldn't handle it. Every time he had been around his “best friend” it seemed like the younger boy ended up crying.
“What's my problem? Clyde I poured my heart out to you. Clyde, you kissed me. You were my first kiss. You were my first everything, and now you’re pretending like you don't remember? What's wrong with you?” Theo quickly stood up, pointing to the front door. “Please leave. Please get out of my house, I can't handle being around you right now.” Clyde shot up, anger fogging in his eyes.
“Theo, I'm telling you that didn't happen! And what are you talking about? You’re being so weird dude.”
“Holy shit, Clyde I'm in love with you! Are you fucking stupid? Im so hopelessly in love with you and I fucking hate it! Do you know how it feels to see the person you've been in love with since highschool fall in love with someone else? And you…You gave me what I've been wanting for years and then just ripped it away from me!” Theo spoke through tears, trying his best to push everything down. But he couldn't anymore. It forced, clawed, its way out of him.
“I just. I wish I could have that night again. I love you so much Clyde. I just want one more night like that. You made me feel so loved and so whole and I’ve never had that before. I want you Clyde. I only want you.” A sigh escaped Theos lips, and he shook his head. “Whatever. Go ask someone else about Y/n. I can't do this anymore.” The tall male stepped closer to the shorter one, watching him immediately step to move away from him. Why did Clyde feel guilty? He didn't do anything wrong. Theo knew he was in love with y/n, why did he care so much? He couldn't handle it, the guilt.
“Theo I…I want you too.” Theo let out a choked laugh.
“No you don't Clyde, you’ve made that obvious.”
“No I do!! I really do…I was. I lied about forgetting it because I felt guilty! I do want you Theo, I wouldn't lie about that.” Clyde's words were hesitant, and stuttered. Almost like he was attempting to come up with a lie on the spot. Theo furrowed his brows.
“Clyde, please dont lie to me about this. I don't want some fake relationship, I want the real you.” Once again, Clyde stepped closer to Theo. This time though, he didn't step away. Grabbing the smaller man's hands, Clyde looked into his eyes.
“It won't be fake. I love you, I do. I just…Please don't tell anyone. I don't want everyone to know I like men, I'm not ready. And I have to keep going after Y/n, okay? Everyone will get suspicious if I don't..” Theo nodded, feeling his heart swell. As much as it hurt that he would just drop the Y/n stuff, he mostly understood where Clyde was coming from.
“Are we…like gonna be together?”
“I would like that.”
“Clyde?”
“Hmm?”
“Please kiss me.”
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braveclementine · 3 months
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Day 6~ 5:38 P.M.
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Warnings: None, Readers under 18 can read this book.
Copyright: My OCs are Coach Yonce, Emma, Ila, Tempus, and Itty Bitty. I own these characters. I do not condone any copying of this.
That was the first and last game of that day. After that, we were taken back to our cells. My guard didn't try to make any conversation with me this time.
I was still trembling when I rode in the elevator with him. If I wasn't so worried about what he might do or think, I would've let my knees give out right then and there and start sobbing like a baby.
I waited until he locked me in my cell.
The minute the door was closed and I heard the lock, I let the waterworks flow. I sobbed so loudly, I thought anyone in the hallway would hear me.
I don't even know if there was anyone on my floor.
I didn't even know if my guard stayed.
We weren't taken out of our cells for three days. Trays were delivered three times a day. They were pushed through the slightly larger flap at the bottom of the door.
The meals were the same, breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Corn, mashed potatoes, and chicken. There was always a note under the plate that told me not to eat the corn.
I only ever ate the chicken.
He always gave me a match and a small piece of lighter paper every day too. To burn his notes and toss the ashes out the window.
I followed through with this perfectly.
I wondered if they were punishing us for the girls stunts.
I wondered what they did with her body.
I wondered how they were going to stop anyone else from trying to mimic her.
We would probably never play on that map again.
Or maybe they would just cut off the outdoor areas. Block them off so we could never get to them.
I wondered if maybe they would just kill all of us.
Nearing the night of day six- in total: three days after the event- my guard finally opened my door.
He was wearing his normal uniform. His brown hair was back in the man bun again and his blue eyes seemed darker than the last time I had seen him.
"Follow me." Was all he said.
I got up and followed him.
This time, he led me in the opposite direction of the elevators.
Maybe he was taking me somewhere to kill me.
If I wasn't so worried about Itty and what my own family was going through, I might've welcomed it at this point.
I still had nightmares about the girl going up like a candle on a Christmas tree.
I probably screamed into my pillow too.
My pillow was always wet with tears when I finally awoke. My throat was always hoarse from screaming.
There was a blue door at the end of the hallway. He opened it, letting me walk past him to go inside.
There was a shower in here. A bar of purple coloured soap sat in the dish. It was new apparently, or at least dry. It looked unused and it confirmed my suspicions that I was the only one on this floor.
I wondered what we were separated by.
Maybe everyone had their own floor.
Two towels were hung up on a rack beside the shower. The shower had no curtains or a tub. The water simply pooled into a drain in the middle of the tiled floor.
"Go ahead." My guard said.
I glared at him.
I stepped into the shower, turning it on and was hit with a wave of cold water. I flinched, but washed myself to the best of my ability. I wish I'd thought to put my hair up, or at least stand back far enough that it wouldn't have gotten my hair wet to begin with.
Oh well, I highly doubted I was going to be caring about what my hair looked like soon.
I'd probably be dead soon.
I turned off the shower, drying myself off with the towel, using the second to wrap my hair up in.
"You're going to catch a cold if you go around in those wet clothes." The guard said.
"I wasn't going to shower in front of you naked." I retorted.
"You could have asked me to turn around."
"You would have ignored me like all of the other times."
"I told you my name."
"It could've been fake."
He smiled a little. I liked seeing the smile on his face. I scowled. My new goal was to try and hate him to the best of my ability.
"How old are you?" He asked.
I glared at him. "How old are you?"
"Thirty-two."
I turned away from him.
"Again?" He asked, amused.
"I'm nineteen." I whispered. "I was supposed to go to college next year. University of Cincinnati to be exact. I was going to be a doctor. I was going to work in the Fertility treatment center at Bethesda."
I could feel tears filling up in my eyes.
"My parents were going to celebrate. Today, actually if I have my dates right. We were going to go to this steak place called Jags. My brothers bought me Marvel Funko pops of Dr. Strange and Iron Man because they're my favorite characters. I was going to add them to my collection."
Tears were streaming down my face now and I kept my back to him the entire time.
"After dinner we were going to the movies. Going to see the new Guardians of the Galaxy movie. I was always a huge Marvel Fan. Well, I actually have yet to see any of the Captain America movies. Guess I never will now."
I turned around, glaring at him. "My name is Y/N Y/L/N. I had a normal life and a normal family. I was going to help mothers bring life into this world. And now I'm letting children be killed just to protect a girl that I think of as my sister. I'm going against everything I believe in. And you stand there, letting them do this to us."
I snapped my mouth closed before I could say anything else. I shook my head, wiping away angry tears. "Fuck, just take me back to my room."
He looked almost confused at my outburst and I wanted to slap him across the face. My palm was literally itching to do it.
But then he had turned on his heel, walking away, and it was to late.
He didn't bring me back to my room however, stepping into the elevators. He didn't engage anymore conversation and I crossed my arms angrily over my chest. I was freezing, but I no longer cared.
We went down to the last floor and it was even colder down here. I clenched my teeth and locked my jaw to keep from letting my teeth chattered. It was dead silent down here and I knew if I let my jaw slack, he would take satisfaction from me being freezing.
"You don't have to keep a brave front up in front of me." He finally said.
"I have nothing to prove to you." I snapped.
His lips quirked into a smile, before he took a left.
At the end of the hallway was a red door. It was completely contrasting in brightness next to the dull stone of the rest of the hallway.
He pushed it inwards and it opened up to another eating area.
Just how many dining rooms did they have in this place?
This table was larger than the others, but in a circular shape. I wasn't the last person here either, several sports were still open and I didn't see Itty, though I could see Emma sitting in one of the larger chairs.
The table itself was rather plain, made of what seemed like cheap wood. The chairs weren't anything special either, simple hardback chairs without even a cushion to make it easier to sit upon.
The table was lathered with several dishes and as we approached, my guard whispered, "Avoid the potatoes and the soups."
I wanted to ignore him so badly. I didn't want to keep relying on his advice. But I couldn't ignore the fact that everyone who had eaten the eggs were now dead.
Except me.
Our plates and cups were empty.
I took the seat that my guard led me to.
The guards were the only adults in the room. The lady wasn't here yet.
A boy was crying quietly in his seat, burying his face into his napkin. His eyes rimmed red.
I noticed over half of them had lost weight. Their appearances were sallower.
Itty was finally led into the room and I got to know that her guard was an angry looking, slightly heavy guard.
She looked almost annoyed as she took her seat. I noticed that her clothes were dry and her hair was wet.
"Are you alright?" I asked in undertone.
"I'm fine. Shower was freezing though." She muttered.
I nodded. So it hadn't just been me.
We waited and we waited and the kids started to grow restless. I watched as one of the boys finally got impatient and reached for the food.
A shock seemed to travel up his arm and he flopped to the floor. The kids sitting on either side of him screamed. The girl actually fell backwards out of her seat.
Several children backed up from the table.
I closed my eyes, reaching under the table to squeeze Itty's hand. She squeezed back just as hard.
Things were getting more dangerous.
Things were not aligned with the rules anymore.
Things were changing.
⬅️➡️
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greenwood106-blog · 2 years
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In Sickness And In Health
You want to test your marriage? This will do it...
So when we left off my stroke recovery tale, I was back to consuming real food and was determined that I would overcome this nonsense.
One morning I awoke and was laying there watching reruns when I lifted my right arm. That's right, I actually lifted my right arm and turned my hand. After several moments of disbelief, the tears began flowing again. Aside from my excitement, my emotions surely weren't working normally.
I had realized that one day when I was watching my reruns and a Sarah McLachlan save the abused animals commercial came on. Normally this might make me yawn, or wonder how much money was spent to get her to do this ad, but instead I was bawling. What the hell was this? I'll explain more in a bit.
So, after texting my wife and stopping anyone who was walking by my room to tell them about my arm, I couldn't wait to get to my first therapy session to show off. But like a kid with a new battery operated toy, I used my arm until my battery died, so when I tried to show the therapists what happened, it was underwhelming. Well, it was cool when it worked.
At this point we had gotten to the 3 week point and now it was how much longer was my insurance going to cover my rehab that was the talk each day. As it turned out, they were only willing to do one more week, then I would be discharged.
As excited as I was to be home (6 weeks was a long time to be gone), I was also a little bummed because I didn't feel I was ready to be able to take care of myself.
The therapy staff was really great, and they were excited to see me as i planned to go there for my outpatient therapy. They were also setting me up with my Cadillac chair at home, which would help until I was ready to move more on my own.
As the day got close, it was a mission to get selfies with all the people who had cared for me during my stay there. I would wheel around and get pics with them and thank them for putting up with me for so long.
The day was finally here, and saying goodbye got the tears flowing again. I told myself I couldn't do it, so I stayed in my room, hiding from my heroes, the people I believe saved my life. Well they weren't gonna let me get away that easy, stopping in and triggering the waterworks as I waited for my ride home.
Th van arrived, I said one more goodbye, and headed home to the next chapter.
It was September, so normal people kept the air on in their vehicles. Yet another change for me was I was now cold all the time, a result of blood thinners and the fact that I had lost nearly 100 pounds through this ordeal. When the van reached my house, I was lowered down in my Cadillac chair and I took in the warmth of the sun.
The work that had been done in my house was overwhelming. A friend who was a contractor installed a ramp at the front door so I could get in and out, the room where I used to teach guitar had been converted and a hospital bed and commode were in there, and my bathroom, which had a tub, had been been renovated to have a walk in shower installed.
My wife had coordinated all of this while saying goodbye to her job. Thankfully, our daughters who lived local helped a lot, but what a load to carry. I definitely tested the better or worse vow, and was just getting started.
I was still transferring with a slide board. I hadn't reached the point where I could stand and transfer, and the Cadillac chair wouldn't fit through the bathroom door, so sometimes the process was transfer to the Cadillac chair, the transfer to a regular wheelchair. Getting me on and off the toilet wasn't an option either, so I would transfer to the commode, take care of business, the my wife had to take care of me and the commode.
I was unable to fully bathe unassisted either, so my wife essentially became a caregiver.
I have joked about the Cadillac chair and all its features. One day the sales rep called and told us that our insurance had decided they weren't going to pay for the chair. We were told the list price, and we could've bought a Cadillac. Then we were told if we wanted to buy it, they would sell it to us for the price of a Kia. I was able test my vocabulary and told them to come pick up their damn chair.
This was an important trigger to the next stage of my recovery. I parked the Caddy and was now using the hoopty wheelchair. This was the motivation I needed to try to stand and walk with a walker. It was challenging, but I did it.
The progress continues.....
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l1l1l1l1 · 3 years
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Violet Evergarden Movie review!! **spoliers**
Ya'll, I've been waiting for this movie for months now and I was super excited to be able to finally watch it!!! Funny short story, I had thought I was watching this movie on Netflix after I finished the series😂 I was hella sad when I found out it was the wrong one LOL.
I was so shocked when they brought up the grand daughter of Ann, who, if you remember, was the girl from the series whose mom wrote her letters every year for her birthday. It really came full circle and I liked the concept of the granddaughter's role, though it was minor. It really solidified Violet's importance and impact she made as a Doll.
Don't get me started on Yurith. Ya girl sobbed when his time came. I couldn't stop crying. But when Iris came in for Violet's place telling him she met Gilbert, seeing him so happy made me shed tears. When his friend came on the phone so they could talk for the last time, it hurt so much!!! Yurith's letters hit home for me, especially his letter to his brother.
I have been waiting and wanting the moment for Violet and Gilbert to be together and to profess their love for one another!!! I love them so much. Seeing Gilbert sad made me sad but seeing Violet crying because Gilbert shut her out made me feel for her. But ahh I'm so happy they stayed together. The ending is pretty open ended but for sure they lived and grew old together.
I forgot to mention how when the ED started playing that’s when the waterworks began to flow even harder lmao. I've seen people post on reddit how this movie ruined the series for them. For me, that isn't the case lol. They say that they should've kept Gilbert dead but I wholeheartedly disagree!! Maybe it's because I'm a sucker for romance but I remember when I finished the season a few months back, I legit was so sad and heartbroken that Gilbert was "dead" or at least we thought he was. Idk, I'm satisfied with this ending. The only thing I would change is have them both move to where Hodgins and everyone is haha.
The relationship Violet had with Hodgins was actually sweet. I saw him as a father figure or guardian for her. It made me sad seeing him tear up at the end knowing she most likely wouldn't come back. I hope he gets a son or daughter one day hahah since he always talks about it. One thing I wanna know is if Cattleya is with Hodgins or Benedict because I've read online she and Benedict were a thing but idk??? I also liked how Gilbert's brother redeemed himself as well and will become the successor to the family. There's so much I wanna talk about but I just can't think of it all at the moment. But overall I loved this movie and it hit me in the feels once again.
Rate: 10/10
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boop-le-snoot · 4 years
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PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 31
First time reader click here
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it's a mental breakdown *off-key kazoo*. One (1) incident of physical abuse from a parent. And Stephen Strange arc begins opening. Kind of angsty, but more of a filler chapter to resolve the parents-suck thing.
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A couple of days was all it took for me to get back on my feet... Figuratively speaking. Neither Bruce nor Tony was particularly excited about me being up and about, I was carried to my desired destination point by one or the other on most occasions. Physically, my body grew tired very easily - I took a lot of sporadic naps throughout the day, more often than not falling asleep in someone's arms. Nobody minded, really - even Loki, who wasn't a touchy-feely person by any means, relented and acted as a body pillow for me when we crashed on the common room couch to catch up with the TV show episodes I'd missed.
Tony was very obviously on the verge of a nervous breakdown. During the few hours I had spent being chased by the Cursed Box Demon in my nightmares, all the leads towards the contractor proved to be cold. Natasha was the most irritated of them all - a late-night talk with Clint through the vent above my room revealed that she took it as a personal insult, unprepared for a simple merc to be so good at evading the world's most notorious spy.
Hulk kept taking over Bruce's body - eyes shining fluorescent green - at the times we were together, periodically clutching me to his chest with clumsy but careful movements. I pitied the mercenary should he encounter my gentle scientist - I didn't think Bruce would even attempt to hold back Mean Green. They seemed to have achieved some sort of symbiosis those days, switching between the two personalities in one body almost effortlessly. Circumstances aside, I was very happy that the tension and the persistent internal conflict inside Bruce had almost disappeared.
What made me upset was Strange. The sorcerer was behaving, well, strangely. He began avoiding all of us - his excuses of helping the search for the merc were flimsy, and Wong's long, deep sigh, when asked about the sorcerer's state of mind, spoke volumes. I suspected Stephen was either seething with anger or drowning himself in the sea of guilt; I had a hunch he was similar to Tony in a way that he hid his vulnerability behind an impenetrable wall of malice and sarcasm and dry wit.
Perhaps I was wrong. But the pent up frustration resulting from the conflict between my overactive brain and my uncooperative body had to blow - and my mother was the fire to my already short fuse. Somehow, she got ahold of the information that I was hurt indirectly because of the actions of the Avengers - and she had called the first available phone she found, which meant Pepper Potts got an earful of vitriol regarding Stark Industries, SHIELD, Tony, and everyone else, including my father. Stoic as she was, Pepper took it all with grace, replying politely to my mother until she hung up on the redhead.
Pepper placed an urgent call to Coulson immediately after that, making the already uncomfortable situation spiral into something truly disgraceful. It ended with strict orders for me to return home - not that anyone besides me and Coulson knew about it. I was a legal adult, I could choose to stay in the tower and my mother was told so on numerous occasions... Knowing her, I was well aware she wouldn't be above storming Tony's home with a small army of her lawyer friends.
Inwardly seething, melting with the anger sitting in the pit of my stomach like a sharp piece of ice, I managed to convince Tony to have Happy escort me home at the guise of gathering more necessities. Tony, being Tony, offered me to buy anything and everything I needed, but relented under my puppy-eyed pleading. It was getting harder and harder to lie to any of my men, the weight of it settling unpleasantly bitter on top of my already foul mood.
Happy grumbled in displeasure at being tailed by a nondescript black SUV - I knew SHIELD would have eyes on me 24/7 now, at least until they catch the rogue mercenary - but seemed to be happy at my general state of relative wellness in his own... Happy... way. Five-second side-grin and "Glad you're up and about, Princess," was probably the most I was going to get from the man who's nickname contradicted his personality. In my humble opinion, he should've been called Brick instead. He was built like a shit house, too.
The moment I stepped into the living room, wearing Wanda's spare sweats and Tony's hoodie, I took a slow look around the room and immediately knew this was it. Most of my anger had receded, courtesy of finally being able to get out of the tower and do something, but the ice in my stomach persisted. The smell of whiskey and cigarettes hit me like a wall, news playing on the TV doing very little to dissolve the viscid, tense silence.
"Sit down," My mother instructed me in the tone of voice she used on people in the courtroom - convicts, people who knowingly broke NDAs.
"I don't think so," I replied, refusing to give in to her bullying. I was being absolutely reckless, I knew it, and still it didn't stop me from standing up for my men. Logically speaking, it could have happened to me anyway, Avengers or not. The cursed box came along long before I'd even met Peter Parker or any of his rag-tag superhero friends.
"Fine," She turned around, steely eyes leveled on me. I was but a speck of dirt under her nails - for the first time in my life, I felt terrified of my mother. I knew what she was capable of. "Listen well, daughter of mine. I'm going to only repeat myself once," She started in that deceptively calm tone of hers. "You are to stop mingling with Stark and his... Company. Immediately. I do not want to hear any more of that Parker boy, either. You will not destroy your future and our family's legacy over some fling with a man twice your age. This little game has gone long enough and it's time for you to get back to reality."
The more she spoke, the higher my eyebrows rose. I was supposed to take orders from my own mother now? Something thin, something thin and crackling with electricity within me just snapped - like a live wire. The hairs on my nape stood up, goosebumps appearing all over my skin. "And what if I do not?" I asked, just as quietly.
I was not prepared for her reaction. One second, she was sitting on the couch and the other - my cheek was burning and my mother was standing over me, breathing the stench of alcohol and tobacco right in my face. I saw the whites of her eyes. "Then you are no daughter of mine. I did not raise you to be someone's cumrag and all this play-pretend scientist shit had to have ended in middle school. I hoped you'd grow up but apparently, you insist on being a baby," She was full-on screaming in my face, so rabid she was shaking.
All I could think of was... How wrong she was. How wrong she would be, her sad little world broken when she finds out just exactly how much I'm capable of. Long gone were the days where I timidly questioned my scientific contributions; thanks to my men - the same men she'd hated so much - I knew my value. I knew I could achieve the things that I wanted.
"If that is your choice, you have thirty minutes to get your shit and get lost. I will not have a whore of a daughter living under my roof," I had missed a good part of her rant; most likely, it consisted of nothing but meaningless insults anyway. After she'd finished, she gave me a shove towards the stairs.
It didn't bother me as much as it should, I think. My cheek smarted and somewhere deep inside, I knew that the eerie calm that had settled over me wasn't normal - on the surface, I felt only relief. The things I suspected all along, finally came to light - she didn't even perceive me as a human being, I was no more than a means to her end. A tool. A thing.
The waterworks started when I frantically shoved most of the shit I could fit in my three suitcases. Upset as I was, my scatterbrain did me a favor that time and I gathered most of the important things. Notebooks full of my research - projects that my mother had called a child's game, projects that could be patented in a week, add a tweak or two. With sudden clarity, I realized I needed none of her money. None of her... At all. In short, I was emotionally all over the place and at the end of it... None of it made sense.
I threw the credit cards with her name on them on the coffee table as I hauled out my suitcases, not sparing the bitch a glance. She was equally quiet, boring into my back with those steely eyes of hers. I felt my skin peel under her stare. In my distraught state, hauling and dumping the suitcases in my car was quick work. Detaching the house key and tossing the last things that connected me to her house on the floor at her feet was a spur of the moment decision; my mother was right, to some extent, and I still had childish tendencies. "You had no right to call yourself my mother in the first place. All you were was an egg donor with more money than you could make sense of. Enjoy your hoard, you damned dragon," I seethed, seeing her frozen in place with her arms crossed and chin held high.
Some part of me hoped she would apologize. That naïve, childish part - I knew my mother and I knew myself, and the trait that we shared was stubbornness. I sped out of the estate without ever looking back, driving aimlessly for a while until the honking coming from drivers around me began reaching alarming levels of volume; tears began flowing down my face at some point, all but obscuring my vision. I parked in the nearest place I could find, in front of a Waffle House out of all places.
Crying in a Waffle House parking lot, how pathetic was that. Logically, I knew at least five people had my back: Tony and Bruce, who surprisingly loved me back; Loki, who had become strangely clingy after my declaration - clingy in the best way. Together with Wanda and Peter, they made my heart warm and my eternally racing brain feel calm and safe.
I called my dad, he didn't pick up. I don't know what I expected of the man, but any and all remnants of my respect for him shattered, breaking into tiny little pieces as I helplessly banged my fists against the steering wheel in a fit of desperate rage. One look in the mirror and my already ashen complexion was made worse by red, puffy eyes and the blooming bruise on my cheek where my mother had slapped me. It was the first time she'd laid a hand on me; I wanted to throw up.
I sat in the car until my breathing slowed; completely and utterly clueless as to what to do. I had no home of my own, three suitcases worth of clothes and research that was useless without a lab to run experiments in, my car, and a small trust fund in my name. The recent incident with the curse box had left me mentally drained as it was, now, I could surely say that my head was empty: no thoughts.
And throughout it all, Stephen's avoidance crossed my mind. As if the self-loathing wasn't enough, as if my own blood, the people who were supposed to care for me, rejecting and ignoring me wasn't strong enough of a blow... The sorcerer's avoidance raised more anger within me. I didn't know why but the thought of him made me want to cry and seethe once again.
Logic gone out of the window, I typed in the Sanctum's address into my GPS with shaking fingers, figuring that if he wasn't willing to do the legwork, I will come to him myself and clarify things for all at once. The mixed signals were just a cherry on top of my sky-high problem sundae.
I banged on the door and it flew open immediately, a surprised sorcerer quickly turning concerned and panicky, noticing my general state of appearance. I was still wearing the same clothes and my hair was in disarray, my face looking somewhere between a coke bender and a manic episode.
"You," I stated darkly, taking a deep breath. "You need to tell me what the fuck is wrong with me and reject me, so I can move on already. And you," I poked the man in the chest, right above the fancy eye-shaped necklace, "Need to stop it with the mixed signals. Stop wallowing in self-pity. Whatever you are doing, STOP IT," My voice involuntarily raised in pitch from all those emotional rollercoasters I've been on that day. "Get back to being normal. Let me fucking live," I finished my tirade as the man stared at me, frozen and open-mouthed.
"I..." He stammered, eyeing me with concern. "What in the multiverse happened to you? What..?" He was so confused, pulling out his phone the moment I bailed my fists.
"My mother threw me out, my father doesn't give a fuck about me, apparently I'm a cheap whore with delusions of grandeur. You're avoiding me and everybody is waiting for me to blow up," I screeched, all but vibrating in my spot. "This is me blowing up. I want answers!" I demanded.
Strange recoiled from me, frowning and pocketing his phone. A deep sigh left him, the kind that made his whole body sag. He ran a careful hand through his hair before looking away and slowly pulling me against his chest, the door shutting behind me and keeping the cold out. I hadn't even noticed I was freezing; my feet were wet from the NYC winter slush and mud.
Stephen's embrace was warm and tender; I wanted to lean into it and push him away at the same time. I was so messed up, it was embarrassing. There was nothing acceptable about this situation - I felt guilty as soon as his face fell.
"Jesus Christ, baby," He mumbled quietly. "Sounds like you had one hell of a day. Let's go, I'll put on some tea," He rubbed soothing circles on my back, something that confused me - I just had stormed in and dumped a bucket of bile right on top of his head.
"I should go," I mumbled, yet had no real strength to move away from him.
"You're not going anywhere. I suppose I need to explain myself, too," He sighed, and despite his obvious discomfort, picked me up, letting my limbs to wrap around his torso like a monkey. I was careful to keep my weight off his hands, even if the trip to the fireplace room was short. As soon as I was placed onto the couch and my shoes were removed, Cloaky drifted over from a dark corner, urging me to take off my soggy hoodie, and wrapped itself tightly around me.
Turns out, semi-sentient cloaks were quite warm.
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THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit ​ @littlegasps ​ @pilloclock ​ @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​ @sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway @softie-socks @schemefrenzy @letsby @cutenessloading @romeo-the-cactus @jelly-fishy-babie @mikariell95
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Over Again
Request: Hey! could you please do one where you’re his best friend and his gf don’t like you. So she tells him some fake stuff about what you did and he believes her. So he stops talking to you. He later finds out she was lying. Can you please make it all angsty
Warnings: jealousy, angst
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You always tried to be nice to Harry's girlfriends. The two of you had been best friends since your sandbox days, so whoever's Harry was with, you did your best to be sweet to them.
But this girl.
She hated you. Everytime you hung out with her and Harry she was all over him, shooting dirty looks at you whenever he paid you attention. It was like she wanted to be the only girl in his world and she made sure that you felt like you didn't fit.
"Hey Y/N." You groan, rolling your eyes internally when you hear her voice. You turn to see her standing behind you, you had come to a coffee shop with her and Harry, just to catch up before he left for tour again.
"What's up Emma?" You look behind her to see Harry texting someone, not paying them any mind. He didn't know there was a problem. You knew he liked her and you didn't want to hurt him .
"I know you said you were gonna go to the American leg of the tour and stay with him...I'm asking-no I'm telling you not to. Don't go." You snort, looking at her astonished.
"Excuse me?"
"I mean...you're not his girlfriend. You don't need to be with him twenty four seven." You chew on your bottom lip, trying to calm your nerves.
"I'm not. This is the first time I've seen him in two months." Its true. Every time you tried to hang out something came up with Emma and he ditched you for her.
"I don't think you get it. Harry is mine. My boyfriend. I'm his best friend. He doesn't need you anymore." That comment was a trigger. The barista handed you your smoothie and you immediately opened the lid, throwing it at her.
"What the fuck?!" Emma squealed, covered in strawberry banana smoothie. You looked over to see Harry getting to his feet, racing over to the two of you in alarm. He stood between you.
"Hey, what's going on?"
"Harry," Emma whined. "Y/N was telling me to break up with you. That I wasn't good enough and then she poured her drink on me."
"What?!" You couldn't believe she would lie like that.
But the look on Harry's face tells you he believes her.
"Really Y/N? What's your problem?"
"My problem?" You ask exasperated. "She's fucking lying. She's the one who told me not to go on tour with you because you don't need me anymore."
"Not true Harry," you roll your eyes as she proceeds with the waterworks. "She doesn't think I deserve you." Harry glared at you, wrapping an arm around her protectively. You feel tears begin to prick your eyes.
"Y/N....I thought we were friends." You can't take it anymore. You throw your hands up.
"Fuck this. I'm done. You wanna throw a twenty year relationship out the window for a girl you've been fucking for six months fine. I'm done." You take the friendship bracelet you two had made for each other when you were seven off your wrist and throw it on the ground. "I'm done. Don't call me. Don't text me. Nothing. " you turn your head, looking at her through tear stained eyes. "I'm out of his life. You got what you wanted."
It felt weird waking up the morning after you left the coffee shop. You felt like you had just gone through a break up. You stayed up and cried most of the night, having shut your phone off. You knew he would never choose you. Your friendship clearly didn't mean as much to him as it did to you.
When you turn your phone on you're bombarded with texts.
Anne: Y/N honey? Harry called me. He told me what happened. Call me please sweetie.
Gemma: Y/N are you okay? Why aren't you answering? Pick up please
And there was no text from him. You take a shaky breath, scrolling through your contacts. You needed a clean break, to let go and start over. You'd given this boy more than half your life. It's time for you to start living for you.
You block Anne, Gemma and Harry. It's over.
Anne has never been more disappointed in Harry. He stares at her in defiance as he explains Emma's version of events.
"Harry do you really think Y/N would do that?"
"I dont know," he falters, "maybe? Why would Emma lie?"
"Because she does not and has never liked Y/N." Both Anne and Harry turn to see Gemma storming into the kitchen. She glares at Harry. Y/N had been her friend too. "And the fact that you're too thick to see that baffles me."
"What are you talking about?"
"Oh come off it Har, everytime you and Y/N make plans she gets in the way. If you're going to do something with her Emma has to go along and then she's all over you the whole time. Are you that fucking blind?"
"Watch your mouth Gem." Anne chastises. She sighs and looks back at Harry. "The point is Harry, Y/N has always made attempts to be kind to your girlfriends because she has always valued your friendship. Why would she suddenly stop doing that now?"
Harry sits quietly for a moment before the realization and disgust with himself washes over him.
He calls Emma to meet him in the park later that day. He's sitting onna bench when he sees her walking up. She's wearing a pink sundress and white Van's, her long brown hair flowing around her. Before he would think she looked gorgeous. Now he was so angry, disappointed and hurt he didn't want to even look at her.
"Harry!" She says excitedly, going to hug him. He holds his hand up, stopping her. "What's wrong?" She asked confused.
"What did you say to Y/N yesterday?" She snorts, rolling her eyes.
"Really Harry? She attacked me."
"But she wouldn't. She would never do something like that unless you provoked her."
"Who's side are you on?"
"I just want the truth. You owe me that much." She purses her lips, eyes narrowing at him. He wasn't going to let it go.
"Harry she was all over you...I had to do something."
"So you lied to me about my best friend and broke us up?" The words slipped out before he could stop himself.
"See! Who are you trying to kid Harry. The two of you always acted like an old married couple. You called her your number one girl. I hated it. You're with me. I'm supposed to be that." Harry can feel tears prickling his eyes. He's an idiot. Of course he is. "Where are you going?" Emma shouts after him, he doesn't say anything. Just keeps walking.
He tried to call her, but she didn't pick up. And then he realized he'd been blocked. He went to her apartment but she didn't answer.
"Y/N please." Harry presses his forehead to the wood of the door, he's sobbing now, his heart breaking. "I know you're in there please....I'm so sorry."
Y/N leans her head against the door on the other side. Her hand on the knob. Tears slide down her nose as she debates opening the door. She hesitates.
And then she walks away, locking herself in her bedroom and leaving Harry out in the hallway.
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niall-talk · 6 years
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You wanted everything to be perfect for today. You had planned this day for three weeks. It was hell keeping this news from him, but you wanted to wait for him to be home from tour before you shared the news. You had dropped subtle hints but he would not pick them up.
You had facetimed with his mother to get her Sunday roast recipe that Niall absolutely loved. He asked why you wanted that. “We never fix roast for the two of us.” Your husband of two and a half years questioned your sudden interest in home cooked family meals.
“It's your favorite meal your mother makes. Thought I might need to know it so it will be someone's favorite sometime.” You thought something might click but nope. He was to far into his golf highlights on the TV.
The dvd you had his audiovisual team fix for you was delivered the day before just like they had promised. You had set up a tee time for him and Willie. Niall questioned your reasoning for everything lately. No wine or occasional beer, different food choices “You been on a health kick lately. What's up with ya?”
“Nothing. Just trying to keep us healthy.” You added a little emphasis on the word us and placed a hand on your stomach. You had not started showing any sign of a bump yet. You had been blessed to not have any morning sickness just yet.
“And I love ya for that I do,but kinda miss my wine drunk wife at times.” He moved behind you and slid his bare arms around you sides and pulled your back to his shirtless chest.
You had a spatula in hand that you threatened him with. “If you make me burn these eggs I'm gonna beat you with this.”
“Umm sounds interesting,” he hummed as he kissed below your ear. He didn't play fair; he knew all your weaknesses and he was using two against you. Hugs from behind and the sweet spot behind your ear.
“You're a menace,” you turned your face to his and pecked a kiss to his cheek before you returned to work on the scrambled eggs. “Go on and get the plates please. Oh and a couple bagels for the mini oven.”
He placed one more kiss on your neck before he moved away from you. “Niall do this. Niall do that,” he chuckled as he tried to mimic your tone. “Starting to feel like Cinderella here.”
“Ok Cinderfella,” you were proud of your play on words there, “I think asking for two things is not too much.”
“Is it too much to ask,” he sang out his own lyric. You couldn't help the smile that brought to your lips. You loved to hear him sing anywhere anytime.
After breakfast was devoured Niall headed to your room to get ready for golf. You were in the closet to find an outfit for the day. He joined you as he dressed in his new Nike golf clothes. A gray pair of golf pants matched with a royal blue Nike top. “So what you got planned for the day?” He asked as you slipped on a burgundy top.
“Just some errands today. Going to the market and other boring things.” You tried to act like you didn't have most of the day planned out up to the minute he found out your secret.
You had left before Willie showed up to collect Niall for their day of golf. You had your list of Maura's ingredients for the roast. You checked it four times to make sure you had everything. Back home you set to work on the meal. You knew it had to cook slow and on low heat nearly all day. You facetimed Maura just to make sure that you were doing it right. She laughed at your intensity of making sure every chop and slice was perfect.
“What is going on dear?” She questioned with that motherly tone.
“Just wanted to make sure it was close to being as good as your roast. You know how much he loves it.” It killed you not to tell her. The only people to know were you, the doctor's office and the audiovisual guys. It was self inflicted torture but it would be worth it at the end of the day.
Niall had text you that he and Willie were going to stop for a couple drinks. You text back ok but don't be too long about it. That you had a surprise for him.
As you added the finishing touches to the meal you heard Niall come in. “Honey I'm home,” he loudly announced.
You couldn't help but laugh at him. “I can hear that Dear. In the kitchen.” You called out so he could find you.
He sniffed at the air a time or two and let out a hum like sound. “Smells good in here. What's in the oven?” He made his way to you and kissed your temple.
“Your mother's Sunday roast recipe.” You opened the oven door to show him. The heat and the aroma hit you both and it made even your mouth water. “Almost ready. You go wash up while i get things ready.”
He came back cleaned up and changed into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. Hair a mess from where he had his cap on most of the day. “Looks like someone got a little sun today.” You kissed his nose as you walked past him to set the table.
“Ah maybe a little. It was a nice sunny day. Just right for a round.” He looked at the table and asked what the special occasion was.
“No reason. Just glad to have you home and want to spoil you a little.” You smiled fondly at your husband; soon to be father of your child.
At dinner you asked Niall what he thought about babies and kids. He laughed, “They are loud, very needy, they stink, and they cannot do a lot till they get older. They are slimy and have grubby little hands.” You could feel your stomach start to churn with sickness. He continued, “and I can't wait to have a liter with you.”
You felt the tension release from your body. “A liter? Really Niall? I'm not a dog or a cat. And I don't want to have that many at one time.”
“Where did this come from?” He asked as he finished his plate. “By the way. This was amazing. Thank you my love.” He leaned over and kissed your forehead.
“Thank you and you are welcome.” You were glad he liked it. “I don't know. I just had a check up at the Doctor the other day we we talked about stuff. How I'm not getting any younger ya know.” You lied.
“So you want a baby? Didn't know if we were ready for one yet.” He replied very nonchalantly. “I mean with me still making music and going on tours. I wouldn't be able to be here to help much when you need it.”
“I know Niall. Trust me I know how crazy and hectic our lives are. But like I said we're not getting any younger.” You stood to clear the table. He helped you and followed you to the kitchen.
“Don't be that way,” he stated. “You know I love ya and if you want a baby then we can work on that.” He placed a kiss to your neck.
“Hey I got you a surprise. It's in the dvd player. Why don't you go get it ready and I'll join you in a minute.” You kissed his lips before you pushed him away.
He did as you asked and you heard the beginning of the dvd. You gave it a few seconds and you heard him call for you.
“Yes dear?” You entered the room to see him with a big smile on his face. The tv screen flashed pictures of the two of you or ones you took of each other. Suddenly there was a cut to an old I Love Lucy clip. Niall looked up at you with confusion all over his face. The old black and white tv show didn't seem to fit with what he had been watching. Ricky read off and announcement: “Dear Mister Ricardo my husband and I are going to have a blessed event. I just found about it today, and I haven't told him about it yet. I've heard you sing a song called “We're having a baby. My baby and me.” If you would sing it now it would be my way of breaking it to him.”
Your eyes blur with held back tears as you wait. You watch Niall as it all sinks in. Ricky starts to sing the song and more pictures play over the song. Pictures of you and him then a picture of a positive pregnancy test. Niall sets there speechless and damn near breathless. Just before the song ends the classic I Love Lucy heart appeared on the screen. It filled in slowly with the following words; We Love Baby Horan. Underneath it reads due June 2019.
Without a sound or warning he is off the sofa and wrapped you in his arms. “Is this? Are you? I mean wow.” He was beside himself right now. He didn't know what to do or say. He hugged you closer and tighter. You heard a sniffle or two and that's when your waterworks started to flow. You cried and he looked into you eyes. He tried to wipe away the tears from your eyes but it was no use. “You are telling me that there is a little one in here,” he moved a hand to cover your stomach. You couldn't find your voice so you just nod as a strangled laugh comes out of your body.
He kissed your lips and whispered back, “I love you.” Then let go and got down on a knee and kissed your stomach. “I love you too little one.”
Niall pulled you into him, and you snuggled in as close as you could. You whispered out to him, “I love you.”
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