#the seductive twin emperors

[gomilktea-blog]

General, pledge your allegiance to us.

[kuroneko1815]

Story time at the Palace

For @eloise175 who asked me about how Callisto screwed up his children’s perceptions on dating and romance via story time. These are El’s bedtime stories.

One day, Callisto will look back on these moments with a sense of fondness and no small amount of regret and horror after the dust had settled and each and every one of his children had followed the ill thought advices on romance he’d given them. Every single one of his precious little treasures had their first child out of wedlock like some vengeance from the Gods, though his beloved wife claimed that it was all his fault for putting the ideas into their heads.

For now though, Callisto was happily enjoying this moment with his family. The favourite kinds of moments that he, and Penelope, would always keep in their hearts. All of them were laying on a single bed with the children in the middle. And even if he’d been a bit irritated for a brief moment when he’d been interrupted in his seduction, all of it flew away the moment he saw those innocent adorable faces of their little angels looking imploringly up at him. He ushered the children into bed, lifting Rigel up when their baby failed to make it up the high bed on his own.

“Servant Emperor, tell us a story.” Judy demanded. His first born, the Empire’s brightest light whose conception and birth had turned him into the man he now was. (A sap as his wife so often says, senile and soft his children agree despite the fact that he wasn’t even forty).

“Hmm, what story shall I tell you?” He asked as he stroked Eden’s hair.

“How did you and mom meet?” Kaden asked. By any standards, that would have been a good story to tell. He glanced at Penelope who raised a brow and gave him a grin as if to say ‘Go on, how do you spin this?’

“I bet it was romantic.” Eden said, her twin made gagging noises. “Stop it, Dante!”

Well, he could do romantic.

“You want to know how your mother and I met? Well our first meeting was just the customary greeting during the homecoming banquet. But the first time we spoke was on my evil half brother’s birthday. I stormed into the banquet with an assassin in my clutches, fury burning through me and I wanted nothing more than to destroy his moment. Your mother was there too, she’d seen me briefly as I’ve just mentioned, during my homecoming.”

He looked at each and every one of their precious little faces and smiled at how enraptured they look. “As I stormed out of the banquet having ‘discarded’ the assassins, my anger still hadn’t subsided. Your mother, sweet woman that she was, followed me out to to the maze in an attempt to comfort me and to see if I was hurt. I’ll admit, I was a bit presumptuous and paranoid and I’d raised my sword at her and demanded to know why she followed me out.”

He paused for dramatic effect. Watched as they waited with baited breath. “Her words struck me, she said she had fallen for me at first sight during the banquet and that she merely came to check up on me and to confess her feelings but understood if they were a burden to me and quite overstepping. Her words stayed with me and I was enchanted from that moment on, I couldn’t get her out of my mind and I wanted to see her all the time. I tried my best and after some hard work, here we are.” He waved his hands around to gesture at them.

Stories always have a lesson in them, right? Then he should add in one as well. “In short, a good death threat gets a good love confession.” From where he lay, he could see Penelope glare at him for the last part, her finger making a violent motion as she threatened in him behind the children’s back. Did he do something wrong?

Dante took his Father’s words to heart and received a love confession from his future wife after his own bout of death threats and Callisto couldn’t be prouder of his son. Not so proud when he discovered that his son had his own little bundle of joy with the woman before they had even gotten engaged. But that was a story for next time.

Anyway folks, that’s it for part 1. Part 2 which is the cave should be up soon, and part 3 is soleil.

[mathlann]

Okay CK3!YM also died, so....I guess he can have a memorial as well since he lasted 50 years on the throne.

Ascended the throne at age 10, his first act being to behead his dad's traitorous second wife for murdering his mom.

Spent his adolescence and young adult years wrestling for control with his Prince-Bishop after his previous regent (his dad) died of pneumonia. That Prince-Bishop almost immediately tried to murder him once he got free.

Ended his engagement to a Polish princess to marry his childhood sweetheart and soulmate, a peasant girl named Ulrike in the wedding of the century. (They had 9 kids together, incl. two sets of twins, 8 survived to adulthood)

Gained the nickname "of the Tress" because he never went anywhere without his wife's love token on his person.

Formed the Swiss Confederacy and founded the Swiss Culture.

Was a bigger party animal than his mom, and gathered a circle of similarly sinful and hedonistic friends, while still maintaining a great relationship with the Pope.

Became a patron of the arts and probably acquired the second largest art collection behind the Emperor.

Had multiple mental breakdowns over his career, one from his wife telling him he was a bit stinky, another from his cat scratching him during playtime, and another from unfulfilled lust (despite a seduction focus, he never successfully cheated on his wife).

Murdered a guy for making fun of him for being a chill dude, and killed a lot of other people, mostly for real reasons like crime.

Surprisingly did not have a conflict with his evil nephew Konrad, because the latter ended up finding religion and deciding not to be evil anymore.

Eventually died of wounds he received a good 2-3 decades before...from a scrap he and his wife got into with some other nobles over a fishing spot.

Putting Cas in CK3 to see how long it takes for her to get assassinated.

[archduchessofnowhere]

"It is a feast for the eyes to see the happiness and harmony that radiates from them": Archduchess Sophie's reaction to her son's engagement (part 2)

Continuation of the letter Archduchess Sophie wrote to her twin sister Queen Marie of Saxony on the ocassion of Franz Josef and his cousin Elisabeth's engagement (part 1 is here):

The Emperor's gentlemen are delighted about his choice and full of touching joy about his happiness. Grünne [Emperor Franz Josef's adjutant general] cries as often as he speaks of it and as often as they speak to him of it. - Unfortunately, the weather was bad on the 18th, but it was perhaps favourable, as the Emperor could devote himself all the more to his young love. At the family dinner the Emperor was so proud that Sisi, who was allowed to sit next to him, had eaten with a very good appetite!… (The afternoon excursion took place in the carriage due to bad weather). He [the emperor] must have been very fond of her to have lasted so long in the closed Caleche! Lenza [Helene] talked a lot and was entertaining, the girl has a great charm for me, my eyes followed her, and that is always the case when I have sympathy for a young person. But you can well imagine that my eyes are also busy looking at Sisi, and they rest with delight on this happy couple who love each other so much and in such a charming way; it is a feast for the eyes to see the happiness and harmony that radiates from them. After the promenade, the Emperor came to me and I noticed that he had something on his mind and wanted to talk to me. I asked him if he had anything to say. He replied: 'Yes much, yes much!' Jokingly I sent Bubi into the other room and there he said I should ask Luise to find out from Sisi whether she wanted him, 'but', he added with his usual modesty, 'ask her not to exert any pressure on her daughter'. Then he said: 'My situation is so difficult that, God knows, it is no pleasure to share it with me!' Then I said: 'But dear child, how can you believe that a woman is not too happy to ease your situation by grace and cheerfulness?'… When Luise came to tea, I gradually acquainted her with the Emperor's wish. She pressed my hand with emotion, for in her great modesty she had always doubted that the Emperor would really think of one of her daughters. In the evening I could not refrain from saying to Elise [likely the Queen of Prussia, Sophie and Ludovika's elder sister] and the brothers as I passed by: 'I am so happy!'…When Luise spoke of the Emperor's intentions to Sisi, the latter was completely moved and looked at her mother with her deep gaze, so radiant and enchanting and with her seductive smile; and when the mother asked if she could love him, she said: 'How should one not be able to love the man?' Then she burst into tears and assured me that she would do everything to make the Emperor happy and to be the most tender child for me. 'But,' she said, 'how can he think of me? I am so insignificant!' - This word proves that she is not. The next day or the day after - I don't remember, because in these days we were so fortunate in a few hours that one can no longer count the time - it seemed to us all again and again as if we had been in possession of this happiness for a long time, and yet it has only existed for four days… on one of these days Sisi said to Kadi this charming word: 'I love the Emperor so much! If only he were not an emperor…!' That is what makes her so shy, this future position. The Emperor was literally delighted when I told him this touching saying from his bride, as it contains so much deep and undemanding understanding for him.

Luise wrote me a few touching words on the evening of the 18th, which I received on the morning of the 19th. I quickly sent them to the Emperor, who immediately appeared at my house, beaming with joy. At 8 o'clock he went to the hotel to Luise, who told him of her joy, and then rushing towards Sisi, the two of them fell into each other's arms, as Luise then told me: and she was so pleased about it! We smiled with tears, Elise and I, when she described it to us. You can't imagine how much and how often we laugh now, Elise and I… When they left the hotel to have breakfast with us, the Emperor gave his bride his arm, and when Kadi and Fischer (the Court Counsellor, as the little ones respectfully call him) saw this, they could no longer doubt that everything was all right, and were heartily pleased about it.

You can't imagine how lovely Sisi is when she cries…! My Karl, Charlotte and brother Karl [Prince of Bavaria, Sophie and Ludovika's elder brother] came to dejeuner. They were delighted when I introduced them to the young couple! I sent for Fritzi and Paula, they were all puffy and red from crying. The Emperor sent for Grünne and his other winged adjutants to introduce them to his bride… At 11 o'clock we all went to mass, which the Emperor had especially wished for. The priest received us with holy water, his eyes full of tears! …"

[stevelastnamespecs]

Steve x Reader

You are a healer’s apprentice in the emperor’s coven. One night, a coven scout you recognize knocks on your door, injured.

—

You’re almost asleep when a knock comes at the door. You sit upright. The rooms set aside in the emperor’s castle for healer’s apprentices like you aren’t big enough for two people so it can’t be a roomate, and you’ve never had anyone come looking for you before, especially not this late at night.

The knock comes again.

This time you get up and nervously open the door.

Standing on the other side is one of the coven scout trainees. Steve, his name was; you were talking to him the other day. He’s clutching his side, and you realize he’s bleeding.

“Hey,” he says, his voice strained, “can I came in?”

You automatically step aside and he stumbles past you to the single chair you have against the wall. His face is streaked with sweat.

“What are you doing here?” You ask, airless helplessly. It seems a bit obvious but you aren’t sure what else to do.

“”Got hurt, he grunts. “Didn’t want to go to the healers for… reasons.”

���Right.” You pull a spare healing kit out from under your bed. As you do you reflect that you must be more tired than you thought if you’re going along with some guy stumbling into your room this easily. “You’re hurt on your side?”

“Yeah. A cut.”

You nod. Healing training is taking over now. “Take off your shirt.”

“What?”

You blush. “I need to see the wound, idiot.”

“Oh, yeah.”

Steve pulls off his shirt. Underneath, he’s soaked in sweat. He must’ve been doing something really active when he got hurt. You wouldn’t be surprised, you’ve heard stories about the training scouts go through.

Before you can check his wound though, your eyes are trapped by his muscles.

Steve’s chest is magnetic, or perhaps gravitational in its pull. His pecs are muscled globes—atlases on which beads of sweat are glistening continents. Your eyes can’t pull away.

“Are those real?” You blurt out. You realize instantly it’s a stupid question but something about those glistening hunks of flesh turns your brain off.

Steve just snorts. “Oh yeah babe, no illusions here.”

He flexes his pecs; a cataclysmic earthquake for those awesome globes. The continental sweat droplets bounce off in a mass extinction event, but somehow, the destruction is almost seductive in the way it sucks in your gaze.

A pained wince from the bearer of those twin beefy worlds snaps your gaze back up to his face. “I, uh… am still bleeding though.”

“Right!” Your face heats up and you pick up bandages from the box at your feet.

Your well-practiced healer’s hands make quick work of wrapping up the wound in his side. As you place the healing patch over the site of the cut and begin pouring magic into it, your eyes drift to his abs.

You keep one hand on the healing patch and run the other over the sharp ridges of his stomach muscles poking out from above the bandages. It reminds you of the pattern on the washboard you use to scrub the blood out of old wrappings. He has them clenched tight against the pain, you realize.

“Wondering if those are real too?” Steve jokes.

“Eh— I, no, you, you’re clenching your muscles,” you sputter. “You need to relax or they won’t heal as well.”

“Oh, sure.” He winces again, but you feel his stomach soften under your hand.

You try to put a little extra magic into the healing patch to soothe more of the pain.

“You know, you remind me of my brother,” Steve says absently. “He was always hanging off of me, admiring my muscles and talking about how he wanted to be like me when he grew up…”

“Oh,” you take your hand back from his abs, “I didn’t know you had a brother.”

“Actually, he was the one I was sneaking out to try and see tonight.”

“That’s how you got hurt? You know you’re not supposed to see anyone on the outside!”

“Yeah, true.” He smiles fondly, looking off past you. “But I could never leave that kid alone for long. He looks up to me too much, I couldn’t do that to him.”

“Oh…”

You take back your other hand, hesitate a moment.

Then you pull Steve into a hug.

He stiffens, then awkwardly puts one arm around you.

“I’ll help you,” you say. “I can’t have you getting hurt again if you’ve got someone waiting for you.”

“Oh.” He softens into the hug. “Thank you. Really.”

[thewriterowl]

Got any uhhh headcanons for a modern day au mafia boss!Din falling in love with mafia boss!Vader’s twink son who has no idea anyone in his family is a gangster???

So Mandalorians are bitter rivals against the Empire. They loathe each other and both just want to take the other out.

The past few years have been interesting with the one dubbed the Emperor was killed off and his right hand took over, it has been a little more quiet...and a little (not much but just a very smudge) not as evil. The movements seem to be a very secretive and quiet and the Mandalorians cannot always figure out what they are doing.

A few years after the man dubbed Vader took over the Mandalorians got a new boss dubbed Mando, showcasing he is seen as the ultimate Mandalorian, and is leading the group (which had been struggling for a while) back into power.

Mando is doing his best to keep his own group's movements hidden. Luckily, they are very good at stealth and assassin work and they bring word to Mando that there is a hidden son who is kept away from the gangster world of his father (his sister, on the other hand, is the one named as the heir) and is just living his life as a pre-school teacher. No one believes it, that just seems impossible that the son of Vader would be just some...teacher.

Din takes on the role to go and try to figure things out and then decides the best way to get information was just to do a very standard practice of seduction. He is going to get things resolved quick (no one knows what he looks like without a helmet he does to protect his identity) and maybe he takes an orphan to enroll in Luke's class and act as his father.

Easy in and out. Maybe a month or two and then the kid and the teacher is out of his life.

Yeah...it doesn't work out.

He gets very attached to the boy acting as his son. And his seduction for Luke is not very...one-sided. At all. Luke just beams at him whenever Din shows up. he acts like this innocent puppy who does have a little bit of a flirting streak and is super interested in Din.

When Din starts sleeping with him, oh no...why does he like this domestic stuff? Why does he like waking up next to Luke? Why does he like tucking Grogu in for bed and taking him to the park? Why does he feel guilty whenever he sneaks around and gets information from Luke?

Oh no, oh no, oh no, no, no, no.

This is not good. The is very bad. He was going into deep. He needed to stop but he had no idea how. He still need information to protect his family! And leaving Luke or Grogu just...sounded wrong.

He gets a big break when, now saying they were boyfriends, was brought to meet his parents and he sees Vader without his own disguise. He now knows how he looks.

And he now, almost unfortunately, realized that Luke truly didn't know anything about what was happening.

Well, it all hits the fan eventually. And Luke is left horribly betrayed and his heart shattered by both his family and Din and just refuses to see any of them. Because of this things get incredibly tense between Din's and Vader's groups, about to lead to an all out war...but both leaders are very unsure about it at the same time since they were both at fault for Luke's pain.

Leia was the only one Luke would speak to on occasion (they're twins--they can't not talk to each other) and then maybe during a FaceTime or call something bad happens and Leia rushes over only to realize with absolute horror that Luke has been kidnapped.

She tells both her father and Din, knowing neither are responsible for this and everyone is in a terrible scramble to find this missing man.

Din promises Grogu he would find Luke and bring him home (luckily the child was never made away he was originally going to be returned but was now 100% Din's son) and the two sides have to work together to find Luke.

Luke was kidnapped by former loyal members of the Emperor who wanted to kill him to get back at Vader.

Dad!Vader and Din have to work together to rescue him. Luke is left rather injured but is brought back home to heal.

Both Dad!Vader and Din are practically in tears as they beg for forgiveness, not wanting to live without this precious man.

Luke is, of course, very forgiving...but says he will never be with either of them if they hurt each other or other people.

And that is how two scary mafia groups became ONE scary and dangerous group...that do very good things cause they don't want to make Luke cry or leave them.

[merryfortune]

On the Banks of the Milky Way

Written for 100ships on Dreamwidth

Prompt #45 Midnight

Ship: Hikaru/Lala

Fandom: Star Twinkle PreCure

Word Count: 1,873

Rating: G

Warnings: No Warnings Apply

Tags: Alternate Universe - Hikoboshi & Orihime, Japanese Myths, Arranged Marriage, Love At First Sight, Artistic Licence, No Dialogue

Synopsis: The weaving princess and the cow herder can only meet at midnight on a certain day of a certain month.

   Once upon a time, a Princess of the Heavens named Lala weaved extraordinary silks by the side of the Milky Way. These fabrics that Princess Lala made would become famed for their shine and twinkle, softness and durability.  The robes made from these silks would be worn by Emperors and Empresses. 

   However, Princess Lala’s weaving was not always quite so masterful at her task of weaving. It was only after she fell in love that she found her stride within her craft and that her weaving came upon the unparalleled beauty it was now renowned for throughout the galactic Heavens. Originally, her craft was considered with much pity.

   Princess Lala, in general, really, was considered with much pity. She was seen as the lesser of the two heirs to her parents’ empire. Her elder brother, her twin, Prince Lolo was thought to be much more capable in any and every task available to either sibling. Arithmetic, poetry, flower arrangement: anything and everything that they put before their children, Prince Lolo exceeded every expectation with flying colours. Princess Lala was not quite so fortunate, her studies would pass miserably at best and fail dramatically at worst.

   Disappointed by Princess Lala’s lack of capability at anything, her parents despaired. The young girl was unlikely to charm any potential lover or partner in front of her, no matter how arranged and firm the courting. Completely unlike her brother who had whomever he met eating out of his hands within minutes of meeting. So, until she could find at least one discipline she could show promise in, her parents had Princess Lala whisked away to the riverside of the Milky Way where she could choose one study to relentlessly pursue until she showed promise as a well rounded, courtesan princess.

   Initially uncertain of what her artisanal calling could be, Princess Lala chose weaving at a whim. The Milky Way was gorgeous but it was cold so Princess Lala decided it might be best if she had some way to make warmer clothes or blankets so weaving it was. Thus, Princess Lala spent many rotations of the sun, moon, and earth weaving fabrics with only calligraphically written guides and study books to aid her craft.

   Her first silks came out from her loom all wrong. The stitches were chunky and misshapen; the base materials, although exquisite in origin as they had been given to her by her parents, under the influence of Lala’s fingers, the fabrics changed drastically into weaved silks. Became coarse and uncomfortable and Princess Lala had no idea why her craft was so bland or cursed. She grew frustrated but she kept going despite her heated frustrations. She was determined to prove her parents wrong: she was just as worthy an heir and person as her older brother, the natural at learning and charisma. She was going to prove it.

   Seasons came and went and by the end of the icier, colder months, Princess Lala could proudly wrap herself up in her fabrics that had increased in quality. They would keep her warm and comforted. They were still not yet gorgeous or otherwise special but at the very least, she had improved and now her work was of a respectably average quality.

   Proud of her work, though she was scared her parents would dismiss it as meagre, she sent them a sample of it anyway by messenger. She sent her weaving samples with a letter which chronicled her work, effort, and improvement thus far - as well as other lamentations that she had with her exile. The Milky Way was lovely, forever twinkling in gorgeous hues of blue and silver, but it was lonely.

   Princess Lala’s desire for a partner of her own had only grown in her solitude and so, she pled that her work thus far would allow her marriage. Her parents read her letter, her wording most empathetic, and reviewed her weaving. Her pleading did ring true, though her garments were plebeian at best, they were no longer the rags of her past so they relented.

   Princess Lala was thrilled to receive the returning news that she would finally have a match made. She could hardly bring herself to weave after such good news but she did manage, keeping her eyes in the distance as she waited most eagerly for her first sight of her arranged marriage.

   On her behalf, her parents contacted a young cow herder by the name of Sir Hikaru whose fields bordered the other side of the Milky Way in the warmer months. Sir Hikaru was more than overjoyed by the message and accepted immediately. She brought her herd to the other side of the grand river and then the two young ladies saw each other for the first time.

   And it was love at first sight.

   Princess Lala’s eyes widened and her breath was stolen away at first sight upon Sir Hikaru. Sir Hikaru flagged her down, waving exuberantly at her and Princess Lala was charmed immediately by such frank and earnest demeanour. For her sake, Sir Hikaru crossed the river of the Milky Way, calm and softly twinkling, with her herd of cows in tow.

   She took Princess Lala’s hand, came down to her knee and gave Princess Lala’s knuckles a kiss. Princess Lala gasped, her pointed ears burning bright pink, at the seduction and it was sealed. Sir Hikaru and Princess Lala were to be engaged. 

   On the banks of the Milky Way river, Princess Lala and Sir Hikaru enjoyed hedonism and each other’s company. They had entire lives to catch up on, to say nothing of what they could look forward to in the future. They chatted and chatted and chatted, their warm, summery days were nothing but bliss.

   Nothing but bliss and bliss alone causing both young ladies to neglect their disciplines. Princess Lala’s weaving fell to the wayside and Sir Hikaru’s cows were wandering the Heavens, trampling all the grass and stars underhoof. Both young ladies were utterly oblivious as they were so absorbed in their own little world consisting of just each other.

   Something had to be done and it fell upon Princess Lala’s parents to put an end to the havoc that Sir Hikaru’s cows were herding - and of course to reel in their own daughter so she took her weaving seriously once more. This was a decree that had to be done in person, Emperor Toto decided and so, he and Empress Kaka appeared before the lovers on the river banks of the Milky Way with palanquins and more in tow.

   Emperor Toto was furious from the second that he arrived. His furor was enough to disturb the Milky Way river - and of the course the two lovers as they lounged upon the starry sands of it. He gesticulated widely whilst he made his decree: the engagement was no more! Sir Hikaru and Princess Lala were forbidden to see each other from this instant onwards!

   Princess Lala was distraught. She was certain that she had met her fated soulmate in the likes of Sir Hikaru, she could never go on were they to be parted. She begged and begged and begged her father to take back his word but he was stalwart. Up until the moment his wife touched his arm and showed sympathy unto their daughter.

   Emperor Toto exhaled and bitterly retracted his decree. They were forbidden to see each other… except on Princess Lala’s birthday and only if she practiced her weaving every day leading up to and after her birthday. It wasn’t ideal, both Princess Lala and Sir Hikaru agreed with only a glance, but Sir Hikaru took it in stride. She conceded, hand on her heart, and was happy with something over nothing. With that, Princess Lala agreed to the decision as well.

   Sir Hikaru’s head hung low but she farewelled Princess Lala. Until the promised day and with tears in both their eyes, they parted. Sir Hikaru rounded up her herd of rambunctious cattle, taking them over the Milky Way and Princess Lala returned to her weaving. With the incident settled, Princess Lala’s parents withdrew from the banks of the Milky Way.

   Though they were apart, they still felt close. Exchanging taboo looks across the river, no matter the weather or season but even so, Sir Hikaru focused on her cows, allowing them to graze where they would not trouble the Heavens and Princess Lala continued to busy her hands with her weaving.

   Yet she observed the most remarkable thing happening with the fabrics she was producing and the garments she was making. They were getting better and better. She could unload the burden of her griefed love unto them and somehow, that made them beautiful rather than destroyed them. So busy into her work, Princess Lala easily ignored the rotations of time, only becoming truly aware of it when she realised just how much time had passed.

   In what felt like the blink of an eye, the eve of her birthday had arrived and she was ecstatic. She sent her parents a message of her excitement to reunite with her lover after so long - and of course samples of her best work yet at weaving. Then, she spent the rest of her time anxiously awaiting midnight and then she would be able to not just see her dear Sir Hikaru but touch her, kiss her, and truly convey the love that she had unto her once more.

   But the tides turned.

   Princess Lala was helpless as she watched the calm, soothing Milky Way transform into something uncrossable. Its waves of starlight were choppy and tumultuous. It would be impossible for her to cross and Sir Hikaru was equally as stranded on the other side of the Milky Way. They were so close and yet so far. Princess Lala could do nothing but scream. Scream for help in vain.

   But someone heard her plea for help.

   From deep within the abyss of the Milky Way, a little blue jellyfish heard her and thus, surfaced amid the waves. Seeing the despairing and despondent expressions upon the faces of both Princess Lala and Sir Hikaru, the small creature knew that he had to help and so, called upon even more to help.

   Jellyfish after jellyfish, plump and ballooning, surfaced on the waves of the Milky Way. Together their plumes formed a bridge that bounced with every wave and though it scared her, Princess Lala crossed upon their crowns, her uncertain amble becoming more and more courageous the closer she got to Sir Hikaru before being able to launch herself at her lover. Sir Hikaru squealed with laughter as she embraced her lover, twirling her around and coming to a rambling halt.

   Her pink eyes were soft and fond. Princess Lala buried her face in Sir Hikaru’s breast, she cried tears of gratitude and disbelief. There was no home truer or lovelier than that of her lover. The wait had been worth it and though they only had a handful of hours together, from one midnight to another, it felt like a blessed eternity between them both.

   And so, even though they only had one, fateful day per year, Princess Lala and Sir Hikaru lived happily ever after.

[reallystellacadente]

The Endless War

This was supposed to be the prologue for my Sith Warrior!Imperial spy AU, The Wicked Game, where the SW crew are spies instead of murder bunnies. I mean, they still killed people, but there was a lot more seduction and sex and backstabbing in the esoteric sense. Ahem. Actually, this was Ch. 2, since Ch. 1 was a cold open because who am I to obey narrative rules, anyway?

The Endless War

It didn’t even have a name. The Great Galactic War ended, and the Cold War began, which meant that hostilities never really ended. When open fighting broke out again, most just called it “the war” or “the galactic war.” Not really a name. War had become a generic, an expectation, the natural outcome of two sides so fundamentally opposed to one another’s continued existence.

The Republic claimed they fought for justice and an end to slavery. The Sith Empire claimed they fought for their right to exist. The Hutts laughed all the way to the bank. The bankers laughed all the way to the expensive resorts. They even rebuilt Makeb out of the goodness of their pocketbooks.

The independent media in the Republic began calling it The Endless War. It was a term not well received on Coruscant. The Dark Council called it “The Emperor’s War,” though the Sith Emperor was now officially dead. The people of his Empire merely sighed and went about their day, heads down. A generation was now of age who knew nothing but endless war.

Then came a wave of attacks, striking Dromund Kaas, Coruscant, Korriban and Tython in quick succession. Soldiers neither side had seen before. Force users. Led by twin brothers, they served neither Dark nor Light. They cut a swath through Jedi and Sith alike, including most of the respective leadership councils. Fleets fell in hours to a phalanx of ships the likes of which no one had ever seen, nor thought possible.

They made no contact with the Dark Council or the Republic Senate. They made no demands. The conquerors came to sow chaos and nothing more. Then they retreated, for reasons unknown, leaving devastation in their wake.

Both the Republic and the Sith Empire sent diplomats to the other to discuss peace. No progress was made.

Finally, the Sith Empire’s agents on Alderaan get a break, a peek into this strange new kingdom that brought terror to the galaxy. From a single intercepted transmission from an unknown source they learned an astounding secret: The Eternal Emperor of Zakuul was dying, and he put it upon his children – the twin brothers, and a sister – to prove to him who deserved to hold the throne. The people favor the elder twin, Thexan. By rights, the throne should be his.

Arcann, the younger twin, his fate sealed by his birth five minutes later, was severely wounded during the fighting on Korriban. He made no public appearances, despite being hailed as a hero. A carefully cultivated source reveals he has significant prosthetics keeping him alive and whole. And full of anger and rage.

The daughter. No one wanted to talk about the daughter. She is High Justice Vaylin. She enforces the laws without mercy. Even the Knights of Zakuul fear and revere her. Though they are supposed to fight in the name of Emperor Valkorion, they really fight for her. To be favored by Vaylin is to be proven worthy.

Their mother is unknown, officially forgotten. A Republic agent found references to a consort but her name was erased from every official source, and the unofficial ones refused to speak it.

Six weeks after the initial attacks, Darth Marr and the Jedi thought to have killed the Sith Emperor Vitiate inexplicably set out together to investigate further. Darth Marr is killed … the fluctuation in the Force is felt by virtually all Sith … and the Jedi, a female Twi’lek, disappears. News leaks out that either Darth Marr or the Jedi killed Valkorion, leaving Arcann in charge. No word on the whereabouts of the other son, Thexan. He is presumed dead, and many whispers agree.

Retaliation is swift: Ships appear in the skies of Dromund Kaas and Coruscant, raining down destruction. The Republic goes silent; the remaining Sith disband the Dark Council. Darth Acina offered an unconditional surrender and named herself Empress. The Sith Empire is named a vassal state of the Eternal Throne.

Vowrawn and Baras survive the attacks (and the rumored purges) to emerge as ministers of logistics and intelligence, respectively. Each secretly longs to have the other killed, but both know the only way to fight back against their new overlords will require their respective disciplines.

But then a band of renegades strikes at Zakuul’s center of power – the Spire – and the missing Jedi is rumored to be the Outlander, an outsider whose only goal, Arcann alleges, is anarchy and the destruction of Zakuul and her people. Nevertheless, hundreds of thousands rally to the Outlander’s cause and a credible threat to Arcann’s rule emerges.

Rather than throwing their support behind the Outlander, the Sith Empire and the Republic resume hostilities, though on a much smaller scale than before.

The Endless War drones on.

Until a Republic agent stumbles upon a secret. And comes to an Imperial spy for help. This is their story.

[mightydragoon]

Darth Vader A+ Parenting.

While Darth Vader in canon ain’t exactly the nicest fellow, this is a Vader or Anakin who has no qualms getting what he wants and using any methods to do so. 

Or otherwise known as Darth Vader A+ Parenting. 

1.  to gain a son Russy

After falling into a trap laid by the Empire and being captured by two Inquisitors, Luke Skywalker wakes up in an unfamiliar room with an unfamiliar man watching over him.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25019218/chapters/60586045

2. No Time Like The Present PinkEasterEggs

In a Galaxy where Princess Leia Organa and Luke Vader have always known they were twins, a deadly discovery by their biggest enemy throws their entire lives upside down. Yet again.

Now on the run from the Empire, the Skywalker twins find it their mission to bring peace back to the Galaxy once more. And with Darth Vader on their trail, that mission is far more complicated than they originally believed.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24754825/chapters/59851300

(Note* Part  3 of the  Back To The Future series. Can be read as standalone) 

  3.  The Heir - SpellCleaver

Darth Vader just killed his master and learned a galaxy-changing truth: the child Palpatine adopted, the Imperial prince and heir, is actually Vader’s son, raised by Palpatine to torment him.

Meanwhile, Luke Palpatine just woke up from severe injuries he sustained in a Rebel attack to a galaxy where his father is dead, he is the Emperor, and the figure from all his childhood nightmares is acting suspiciously nice.

They figure it out from there.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24024442/chapters/57801529

4. Eclipse - SpellCleaver

Luke and Leia, the twin children of Darth Vader and heirs to the Emperor himself, defect. When they do, it's naturally a dream come true for the Rebellion and the mother they never knew, one that's been a long time in the making.

But they have to get to that point first.

Or: Darth Vader unwittingly sends his children down the merry path of treason... and the ugly, painful fallout.

(Note* Obviously) 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18221840/chapters/43109123

5. Walking the Line Between - aradian_nights

After an emotional confrontation on Bespin, Luke Organa has been captured, and his newfound twin Leia Skywalker will not stop until she has rescued him. Even if that means murdering their own father.

( How the Other Half Lives  -   aradian_nights) 

(Note* the entire series is this but more in particular the recent additions, I’ve already discussed this story multiple times before so you know the drill )

6.  The kidnappings of a Sith Lord - maedre13

How a certain Sith Lord may or may not kidnap his rebel son. One-shots. Strongly inspired by sparklight´s “Where Our Intrepid Hero Doesn´t Get Away”.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10606992/chapters/23453241

(Note* not all these chapters are Vader at his worst but he isn’t exactly a top notch parent in them either) 

7. How to Save the World from its Heroes - stardustgirl

Being the Avatar’s—and Fire Lord’s—non-bending heir isn’t what Luke signed up for. He also didn’t sign up for an Agni Kai he can’t possibly win, or for getting dragged into a search for someone who can kill his own dad. Then again, someone has to bring the world back into balance, and if his dad won’t, then Luke might as well give it his best shot. After all, how much worse can things get?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24948487/chapters/60386875

(Note* Only started and already you can see Vader A+ Parenting in all its glory) 

8. your heart is full of stars and your hands full of shattered glass -victoriousscarf

Nineteen years ago, Vader took his children off Mustafar, and Palpatine raised them to be Sith, the perfect weapons he had been looking for.

Except the very eve of his greatest victory, the fully functional Death Star, Luke Skywalker defects to the floundering but growing Rebel Alliance. His sister follows because someone needs to watch out for that fool.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13242183/chapters/30290415

9.  Love of a daughter. - youngjusticewriter

"and yet, so far at least we have yet to figure out what you gain from this." It's a question as well as statement. A chance to explain, to come clean on why she - a unknown Sith- had assassinated they're precious, beloved Chancellor (what fools). But how could you come clean when there is so much blood on her hands? Never-mind the sins and blood on Vader and Luke's when her family had been alive.

When she answers it's not because she's announcing her transgressions in hope that her heavy, dirty soul might be saved. One couldn't repent when they didn't feel guilt in their sin.

"For the love of a daughter." Leia pauses and looks back at Anakin and thinks: I did this to avenge you. After thinking that Leia says one more thing - the last thing actually because she nothing else to say after this.

"And you should have been more careful electing your Chancellor. You never know who is Sith." This has double meaning but she's the only person who knows it.

And she's fine with that (no, she isn't).

Leia wonders if her younger self and Luke will ever become the monsters like her Luke had been and the monster she is.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10924239/chapters/24297558

10.  Literal Hell - TreeOfTime

Luke Lars is content as a Moisture Farmer with his father and mother... until two people come to find what was lost to them...

Then all hell broke lose

https://archiveofourown.org/works/22579066/chapters/53957833

(Note* oh dear lord Vader A+ Parenting in its full glory, a Sith Leia for flavour and a non force sensitive Luke. ) 

11.  Dynasty - Valerie_Vancollie: Co-authored by Rebecca Thomson aka Zekkers.

Hit in the leg by a stormtrooper's blaster bolt, Luke falls in the Death Star hanger bay and is unable to escape on the Falcon along with Han and Leia. During the subsequent interrogation, his true heritage is revealed and Vader instantly takes him to Coruscant, determined to reclaim the son the Jedi stole from him. But the glory of the Imperial capital belies its true nature, where politics and power are everything and anything is fair game in the never ending game to reach the top. Not lying, not betrayal, assassination, sabotage, blackmail, nor seduction. As he commences his Sith training, Luke must also learn the rules and etiquette of the Imperial Court if he is to survive as most of his enemies fight their battles with words and political maneuverings rather than military force. Yet, even as he struggles to gain his place within the Empire, Luke learns that his best friend has joined the Alliance...

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13111908/chapters/29997507

12. Fractured twists - Annessarose

Timelines are fickle things.

Every line is balanced precariously on the precipice. One shift, one twitch of a finger, one step in the wrong direction, and entire stories change. Lives flicker out, galaxies rise and fall, but the Force is always a constant.

Each moment is carefully balanced. We know how the Siege of Mandalore happened - how the former Jedi padawan Ahsoka Tano led her men into victory. How she defeated Maul in single combat and earned the loyalty of Lady Bo-Katan Kyrze. How she rode her ship too late to meet with Anakin Skywalker, and how the galaxy fell and burned under the hand of the Sith.

This is the way it could have gone if Obi-Wan had followed Ahsoka to Mandalore.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24158608

13. Runaway- Valerie_Vancollie

Co-authored by Rebecca Thomson aka Zekkers & a contest winner.

What if Luke had runaway from Tatooine and joined the Imperial Academy?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12976095

14. A Mother's Decision - Valerie_Vancollie

What if Padmé had brought Luke to Vader when Luke was only nine months old?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12915687

15. Descent into Darkness - Valerie_Vancollie

What if instead of waiting for Luke to come to him on Endor, Vader had gone for Luke and the others, capturing them while with the Ewoks?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12908223

16. Avenge and Conquer - arikylo

The Alliance has fallen into a very well laid trap and now Luke has no choice but to hand himself over to Vader. But what does the father have in store for the son? Can Luke handle the torture and the ruthless tactics of the Empire or will he be forced to surrender and embrace the dark side?

The struggle between the light and the dark is strenuous, relationships crumble and all is looking bleak for the Alliance.

Dark!AU set after ESB.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/3058115/chapters/6639581

17. The Terrorist - Seasider

High above Bespin in Cloud City, Vader chooses not reveal his identity and instead uses deceit to trick Luke into surrendering. The Dark Lord has a lot on his agenda, so he entrusts the breaking of his son to an Imperial interrogator, unaware that the man has an agenda of his own: revenge.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24810643/chapters/60006952

(Note* Dead Dove do not eat. Contains some reall fucked up shit) 

18. Consequences - treenahasthaal

An intense burst of light and a vicious blow to his left shoulder sent him spinning violently backward and he fell...

What if Luke hadn't made it off the Death Star immediately following Kenobi's death?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/809144/chapters/1527145

(Note* It’s also a boba fett/ luke) 

19. Instinct - treenahasthaal

There was something about the blond boy in the crowd of detainees that caught Commander Yarryn's attention. Something that pulled at his gut and told him there was more about this captive than met the eye. It was his duty to find out what it was the boy was hiding - and find it he would, for Yarryn was very good at his job.

12 weeks after the destruction of the Death Star.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2185854/chapters/4785594

( Part 1 of the Invictus series) 

20. Child of Mine - Oneshotshipper

AU. Darth Vader discovers Leia at a young age. Barely managing to escape her father's clutches the first time, young Leia goes into hiding and becomes the Empire's most-wanted fugitive. If the second time comes, fate will not be as kind. Meanwhile, Darth Vader would tear apart the galaxy itself to possess and keep his child. The Dark Side seems to inevitably be the fate of the Skywalkers.

21. To Catch a Daughter, One must... - ftbprotocol

A variety of AU one-shots where in canon Leia stayed a secret, but in these stories did not. Because there needs to be more Leia and Vader fic!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12173637/chapters/27632673

22.  Daughter Over The Son - Keetajet

Work is inspired by ftbprotocol's work "To Catch a Daughter, One must..."

The moment where Darth Vader did not save his son. Instead, he will have his daughter.

Leia's future went downhill the moment she felt her brother die on the second Death Star, leading to their capture on Endor. Only she, Han, and Chewie survived the failed ground assault and they were restrained and being held at gun point.

She has a bad feeling about this.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25354183/chapters/61476130

23. Before the Emperor - SilverDaye

Luke is defeated and captured at Cloud City by Vader. He is then dragged before the Emperor. However Palpatine is dead. Luke's father is alive. And someone else holds the reigns to Vader and the Empire.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15950198/chapters/37196351

Tags- to help search for more

Darth Vader's A+ parenting

Dark Anakin Skywalker

Sith Luke Skywalker

Imperial Luke Skywalker

Luke Skywalker & Darth Vader

Leia Organa & Darth Vader

Bad Parent Darth Vader

[lanonima]

A Silverwood post, because I haven't done one in a while. I always say that they're rich, but exactly how rich are they? So this is generations one and two in order from most to least wealthy. Because if I come up with a shitpost idea that I actually haven't done yet, I must do it immediately.

*

1) Dumas

Sources of income: part of Ithea’s inheritance, adventuring, book deals, scamming casinos

the thing with Dumas is that he has no interest in fancy living, and he spends almost all of his time adventuring, and he married a selkie so his wife and kids are mostly happy to live in the sea. He's very good at investing too so that means that money always comes in but it very rarely goes out.

2) Gavin

Sources of income: half of Anthem’s inheritance, part of Ithea’s inheritance, criminal empire

also very good at investing, but he is interested in the finer things in life, he has a lot of employees to pay, and since quite a lot of his money comes from illegal sources he has to also spend a lot of money on bribes and things like that

3) Cyan

Sources of income: very successful theater career, theater owner, bar owner, black market trading

she turned her back on her family inheritance, and started from scratch. She did a very very good job at that. But she lives an extremely glamorous lifestyle, and owns two businesses that take rather a lot of money back, plus needing to pay bribes and other such things

4) Ithea

Sources of income: murder, seduction, theft

she had quite a lot of wealth, but…she is a Drezhein after all, and one of the twelve lords at that. As is typical for her species, almost all of her wealth is in jewelry, art, artifacts, and other such things. She was constantly getting gifts from men who she had charmed, and was also not above stealing from people she had murdered. Actually, she rather enjoyed it.

5) Anthem

Sources of income: murder, seduction, theft

he might have ended up having more money than Ithea, except for the fact that he spent so much of it on rare magical ingredients for his experiments, and also on trinkets for women he was trying to seduce. His will left one third of the money to Gavin, one to Cyan, and one to Kaite. But Cyan left so it ended up being split in half instead.

6) Junior

Sources of income: career as the military leader of Daemirra

he's also the crown prince, but Daemirra isn't really into the idea of royalty living so much better than everyone else. The only one who can pull from the royal coffers is the current Emperor or Empress. His career does pay well though, and he naturally does not have to pay for things like housing and food

7) Charlie

Sources of income: half of Ithea’s inheritance, runs a very successful boarding school

of course he blew all of his inheritance almost right away by supporting his husband's failed coup d'état, but his career now is very stable. If you combine his income with Tony's, they probably have more money than Junior but this is a solo ranking.

8) Keir

Sources of income: part of Ithea’s inheritance, adventuring, lecture tours, scamming casinos, marrying royalty

spends most of his life adventuring along with his twin brother. Unlike his twin brother, he is a feckless spendthrift and, like his father before him, quite a slut. He spends most of his money on gifts and trinkets that he gives to people he's interested in. He married his cousin Anise who is the current Queen of Tesara but while they do genuinely like and respect one another quite a lot, they do not love one another. He gives her a safety net since she is the first queen of an extremely patriarchal country, she now has a husband who has no interest in the throne and whose behavior means that nobody else wants him on the throne either. Plus, of course, heirs. She gives him a stipend from the royal coffers to live off of.

9) Kaite

Sources of income: half of Anthem’s inheritance, part of Ithea’s inheritance, marrying royalty

neither Kaite nor her wife are all that interested in money. Kaite spent quite a lot of her money getting Jean safely out of the country when the revolution happened, and they spent most of what was left building the cottage that they live in together and do just fine living self sufficiently. Unlike all of her siblings higher on this list, she does not have any money in any banks. They do have enough stashed that they could start over again if they had to, as Jean's bloodline does put her at risk if there was to be yet another coup d'état or revolution in Sanirra

10) Ro

Sources of income: ???

Ro also turned her back on her family and left all of her inheritances behind. She and her husband ended up settling down in northern Inua, where the barter system is still used more than money. They do have some valuables but not really all that many, and are mostly interested in living like everybody else in their village

[starwarsforcestuff]

10 for the star wars asks!!!

Thanks for the question! Question 10 is, “do you think the Jedi were right or wrong?”

Simply put, I do think they were right. Do I think they were perfect? No. Am I in the minority of people who believe this? I feel like it. I did a quick google search of that question to see what kind of responses are already out there in the world and the majority of results were overwhelmingly not in favor of the Jedi, even going as far as calling them the Saga’s true villains. Another reason I googled the question was that this is an extremely vague question, in what aspect are we talking about right and wrong. I will still try to break it down as specifically as possible. Go ahead and respond with more specific questions if you so choose!

Reason 1

One reason I wholly believe the Jedi are right and good is a quote from Master & Apprentice by Claudia Gray.

“It matters which side we choose. Even if there will never be more light than darkness. Even if there can be no more joy in the galaxy than there is pain. For every action we undertake, for every word we speak, for every life we touch—it matters. I don’t turn toward the light because it means someday I’ll ‘win’ some sort of cosmic game. I turn toward it because it is the light.”- Qui-Gon Jinn

The Force will always create events that balance each other out and if we all remember that iconic Freddie Prinze Jr rant he backs that up. If anyone hasn’t seen that rant here is Star Wars Theory’s reaction to it. You don’t have to watch his commentary I just couldn’t find an undoctored version and Star Wars Theory bleeps out the many many F-bombs Prinze drops. 

“Luke’s skill doesn’t dictate whether he wins or loses. The Emperor doesn’t dictate whether he wins or loses. The Force dictates who wins or loses based on balance...[On the seduction of Anakin Skywalker] If the Emperor was the smartest dude in the universe and knows that the Force dictates this if he kills who he sees as a rival, Anakin, then he knows the Force is just going to f****** correct that. Because The Emperor knows this. These are George Lucas’ words, not mine...So the Emperor knows that. Instead of killing Anakin, what does he do? he seduces Anakin. To double the strength of the Dark Side. So what does the force do? It balances us. How? It gives us twins. Luke and Leia. Two and f****** two. Balance.” 

While it was lengthy, somewhat redundant, and had multiple f-bombs, Prinze Jr arguments make a clear point. If the force will always course-correct itself it begs the question of why even choose? If every good action will always be met with an action of mal intention why does it matter? This is the very question Qui-Gon answers in that quote. What is the answer? Because even if doing good gets you nowhere you are still doing good. Good is good. Turn to the light because it is the light. I like to believe every Jedi had this mentality but considering Qui-Gon was speaking to another Jedi I can’t say that every Jedi believed this. Regardless, we do know that with this statement and Freddie Prinze Jr’s comments that the Jedi are supposed to be proponents of the light side. That is reason number 1, and probably the biggest reason I support the Jedi.

Reason two  

Moral absolutism. There is the Light side and the Dark side. That is it. There is no in-between, a Jedi is either good or bad in which case they become a Sith. In Prinze Jr’s interview, he states, “There’s no such thing as a gray Jedi...There’s no gray! That’s pretend fan-fiction s***, which is cool but don’t try to canonize it because it doesn’t work and I’m never gonna buy it.” There are those, like Qui-Gon, who may interpret the code more loosely, but he is still a Jedi, not a “grey Jedi.” 

In contrast to the Jedi though, in an interview with Alexander Freed, author of Alphabet Squadron, Battlefront: Twilight Company, and Rogue One, states that while you do have people like the Jedi and The Emperor, there are plenty of people in the Star Wars universe that lead mundane lives not really fighting one way or the other. 

“It is a setting that has an absolute good and absolute evil...Yeah there is no moral ambiguity to Palpatine. Palpatine is a creature of pure darkness.” 

In this interview, he mentions that the characters of Alphabet Squadron need to decide where their moral compass lies when they do live somewhere in the middle. It almost seems contradictory though because I would argue that if you are basing this argument on the metaphor of a compass, everyone who fights for the light would be good and everyone who fights for the dark side is bad, there would be no in-between like a spectrum where you would have “grey” areas. That also tarnishes the reputation of defectors like Yrica Quell, Finn, Archex (From Phasma and Black Spire), Iden Versio, Del Meeko, Jannah and the rest of company 77 who defected from the First Order or The Empire in Quell’s case. Using the spectrum argument, the fact that they even belonged to the dark side would tarnish them, give them “negative points” and never fully allow them to be absolutely good. They will always be held back by their past.

Here is the full Star Wars Show and interview.

The interview starts at 3:05 and ends at 6:32. 

This is how we know The Empire was bad, The Imperials and the Sith are bad, The First Order was bad. They use the dark side and do unspeakable acts of horror even after the death of The Emperor with things like Operation Cinder. This is also how we know the Jedi are good and right. The Jedi fight against the dark side, they stand for truth and justice and peace. They may work outside the law, but I don’t see people having a problem with that when it comes to Batman or Superman or Captain America. The question though becomes do the means justify the end? I can’t answer that question because I think it should be situationally based i.e the destruction of the Death Star. The destruction killed thousands and thousands of people, but it could kill hundreds of millions more if not stopped. We know there was no other way, therefore I would argue that the means justified the end. 

Reason 3

At the end of the day, Star Wars is a children’s story. It is a children’s story based on Greek Mythology and archetypes. In those stories, it is clear who is good and right and who is bad and wrong. We are the ones who have contorted this basic story to the point where we have questions like this. Am I mad that we have? Not in the slightest! discussing and analyzing works are really fun to do, but it is my belief that we as a fanbase have taken it too far that we ask questions like are the Jedi right or wrong, was the Empire actually good, are the rebels justified or were they just terrorists? 

Not to deflect or belittle or suppress this question, but we know the Jedi are right because George Lucas says so. While I know a big criticism about my overall argument is “you can’t say the Jedi are right because they fight for the light and the Sith and the dark side are wrong,” all I have to ask is, if you have to justify genocide to prove your point (Order 66 and Operation Cinder) why in the world should I believe otherwise.

I am VERY open to FRIENDLY discussions about this. I even encourage more specific questions about the Jedi for better more in-depth answers if anyone is interested. Also, sorry I kind of rant in the middle about characters in general.

@fandom4fandom thank you very much for your ask! I hope you have a great day! May the Force Be With You!   

Sidebar: I just finished Alphabet Squadron and I enjoyed it. I love reading about things that happen between the fall of The Empire and the rise of The New Republic and this gave me that. Battlefront II was really cool for me because that was my introduction to Operation Cinder and you had to play through it and Alphabet Squadron is a direct continuation of the wreckage and result of Operation Cinder.

[newmayhem]

Ha'Shmla Dictionary

Disclaimer: None of this is mine, everything was collected from Amelia Atwater-Rhodes’ old websites, the wiki, and the old message boards. Anything written in the first person is a direct quote from Amelia Atwater-Rhodes. For all the entries in the The Den of Shadows Reference series, check the tag or this page.

This dictionary in particular is courtesy of @sleepyspoonie​.

WORDS

A

a – from, of, after

acita – nice, pleasant, nicely, pleasantly, to be nice, to be pleasant

adad – less, to have less, lessening

adir – more, to have more, increasing

Ahnleh – Fate, Eternity, Illusion, Destiny, the eight deity/concepts in the pantheon combined with the concept of Choice and the ability of Choice to change EVERYTHING

Ahnmik – Power, Power of Will, eternity, illusion, bondage, peace, strong and emotionless thought

ahoke – remain, to remain, what remains

a’le – a form of informal improvisatory dance, putting a twist on an old form (example: sakkri’a’le , harja’a’le), literally “according to your will”

ale – will, intent, that which is intended to happen

aleya – wish, to desire, to want

Anhamirak – Freedom, Free Will, eternity, illusion, passion, war, strong and thoughtless emotion

aona – heir to empress / emperor, lord / lady, ruler of second highest status, literally “future ruler” or “after the current ruler” (a = from /after, ona = current ruler)

ase – good, well, to be good

ashe – informal generic good-bye or farewell, to say good-bye, a separation

asta – because, caused by ___  

awebre – song, to sing, melodic, musical, music

ayan – end, to close, closed, closing

azne – fear, to fear, frightening, afraid

B

ban – ability, to be able (to), able

banzi – great, greatly, one who is great

battou – enough, to have enough, sufficient

bitte – taste, flavour, to taste

brokan – eternal, timeless, forever, eternally, always

Brysh – Death (both the concept and the entity responsible for it, so always capitalized

btaleh – naïve, naively, one who is naive

C

carnan – gift, to receive, given

cia’Brysh – end, the end, to end, an ending, ending place, final

ciacin – hello (generic formal)

cin – hello (generic informal), to say hello, a greeting or a meeting

cia’Namid – beginning, to begin, a beginning place

cinca – day, the day, a day, daily

cincanon – night, the night, a night, nightly

cincara – Good morning! , a morning hello, morning, young, new, foolish

cincarre – Good afternoon / evening! , an afternoon or evening hello, afternoon, evening, old, wise

cjarsa – silver (the substance AND the colour)

cocoon – to fade, faded

D

dasandi -  discovery, to find, found, finder

devan – to stand, resolved, adamant

Diente – King or Queen of a diverse group, less powerful but less isolated than Ona and Aona

dinga – to follow, to pursue, follower, pursuer, one who follows, a following, a hunter, one who hunts, hunting

divi – stars, star, starry, like a star

E

Ecl – Uncreation, Nonexistence, Void, all that does not/cannot exist, illusion, eternity, the future, insanity, delusion, delirium

efelna - green

einir – to change, in the sense of becoming something else, not in the sense of replacing

elar – a dash or hyphen used to separate lines of writing or individual thoughts (-)

elavie – a shapeshifter

enae – death, dead, to die

epule – to rely on, trusted, reliable

F

fal – hand, reach, reaching, the ability or power to reach, all that is within your scope/power

falianam –bereft, to bereave, to take away, literally “empty handed” or “unable to reach / obtain / have”

falmay – to help, to assist, assistance, literally “to give a hand” or “to lend a hand” or “to give what-is-within-your-power”

falnas – hand, to touch, to reach out for something, literally “reach-feel” or “ability to feel/touch”

fant – anger, to become angry, angry

fente - wing

ferat – skin, to feel (something)

fide – faith, faithful, to have faith (in)

frel – to make, to build, maker, builder

G

gah – sight, to see, visible, gift

gah’Ahnmik – darkness, dark

gah’Anhamirak – beauty, beautiful, light, bright, glory (as of brightness)

gase – beauty, to be beautiful, beautiful

gen – you (informal), your

geniam – liar, to pretend, false, actor, to act, lying, deceit

girian – gold, golden, gilt

H

ha – speech, language, to speak, speaker

habre – rose (the flower), rosy

haile – savior, hero, to rescue, saved

halaur – disturbance, to be out of place, interloper

hanlah – easy, effortless, without difficulty, not hard to do

hanlah’melos – the first dance a dancer learns, one dancer with one scarf, literally “easy scarf-dance”

hara – echo, to echo, echoing, literally “speech-child”

harja – attraction, to attract, seduction, to seduce, a form of dance with 6 variations, all using either a drum or no accompaniment at all in the background

hatia – lose, to lose, lost, loser, losing

he – sound, to hear, audible, audibly

heah – thought, to think/know/believe, believed, thoughtful, thinker

heah’ne – crazy, literally “little thought”

he’Anhamirak – noise, noisy

heasha – memory, to remember, remembered

hehj – do, did, does, will, am, are? The Generic Question Word (what? when used in conjunction with another question-word)

hehja / ke – if/then

hehj’ban  - can ___? may ___ ? literally “what way” or “what ability”

hehj’heah – how ___?  literally “what thought”

hehj’hena – what ___? literally “what is”

hehj’sheni – when ___? literally “what time”

hehj’lo – where ____? literally “what place”

hehj’rsh – who / whom ___? literally “what people”

hemet – to realize, realization

hena – to be, having existence, is, am, are

heur – brilliance, to shine, bright

I

ihelo – to become, becoming

ikku – belief, to believe, reasonable/plausible/believable

im – creation, to become, new

intre – silence, silent, silently

irmalo – brother, fraternal

itil – dancer, to dance, dancing

J

jacon – need, to need, necessary

jas  - love, understanding, compassion, charity

jaes – jewel, art, magic, that-which-is-valuable-or-useful, skill, talent, purpose, use, value, treasure, that-which-is-precious

jaes’falnas – a dance that uses props, either fire, blades, or crystals (the “jaes” or jewel), literally means “jeweled hand”

jaud – moonlight, to shine, to glow, the colour of moonlight

jeira – blue, royal blue

jkair – flight, to fly, able to fly, ability to fly

jol – war, to war, of war, warlike

K

ka – no, negative, the opposite of ___

kaen – correction, to fix, incorrect

Kain – Thunder, music, air and water, living in the now

Kain’he – air (thunder-sound, literally)

Kain’he’nese – breath, to breathe (literally “air-life”)

kajaes – without magic, without skill, useless, without a purpose, worthless, having no value

kala – worship, to worship, a worshipper

ka’rre – pain, to harm, painful, torture, to torment, literally “no relief” or “opposite of healing / rest”

Kaya – Lightning, dance, fire and earth, living in the now

Kaya’gah – light, bright, literally “lightning-sight”

Kaya’he – fire, to burn with flame, literally “lightning-sound”

Kaya’he’tasa – heat, to burn with heat, hot, literally “fire’s greed”

ke – yes, affirmative

ke’ke – and, also

keiel – hatred, loathing, to hate

keyi – hope, hopeful, to hope

kin – effect, result, what happens because of a person’s actions

kisu – to kill, killing, killer

kontiel – avalanche, tumbling, to tumble

ksmarjan – fantasy, imagined reality

kyrai – informal ‘she’

kyrait – informal ‘he’

kyrsh – informal they, them, their

L

la – I, me, mine, my, to be called, named

lakin – fault, responsibility, to be at fault, to be responsible, credit

lalina – humanity, human

lalintoth – friend, friendly

la’pt – us, we, our, ours

lar – to strive, to struggle, the superlative form: ____est

larmaen – center, crucial

las – every, everything, all

le – will, to want, desire or will, chosen, to choose, to make a choice, ability to choose

le’Namid – birth, literally “will of Namid”

Leona – kingdom, literally “will to command”

Leonisa – divine realm, literally “kingdom of gods”

Leon’Namid – beginning realm, before creation or birth

leoser – sleep, to sleep, sleepy, sleeper

live – wake, to wake, wakeful

litae – blaze, large fire, blazing, ardent, zealous

lo – place, location, placement, habitation, state-of-being (both physical and spiritual place); sometimes used as ‘of’, but not in the usual way

locina - yesterday

lockli – forest, to grow, sheltered

M

mael – elite, the colour silver (but NOT the substance)

maen – within, inside, contained by ___

maenka – beyond, not within, outside

mak – true, correct, accurate, precise, pure, right, real, reality

mana – lord or lady, keeper, person of power, person of responsibility, Master or Mistress

mareksa – foreboding, to forebode

marl - white

may – to give, to lend, loan, aide, gift-of-the-temporary-sort, gift-of-the-moment, an act of kindness or charity

Mehay – Creation, Existence, all that exists, all that is created, soul, past, the universe, illusion, Reality, eternity

mehn – creation, to create

melos – scarf or sash, a form of dance involving the use of scarves, having 13 variations, including hanlah’melos, pan’melos, and melos’girian

melos’efelna – a dance involving two dancers (lovers, in this case) with three scarves, literally “green scarf-dance”

melos’girian – a dance that serves as wedding vows for the dancers involved, literally “golden scarves”

mijrasi – edge, outside, external

mir - maybe

mirshna – to sense (non-tactile), intuition

N

nanon – to avoid, unpleasant

naral – blade, sharp, to cut

nas – touch, to touch, to feel, tactile, gift

nasa  - command, order, imperative verb tense

nelar – breath, to breathe, literally “to strive for life”

nepon – flower, to blossom

nese – life, alive, to live

Nesera – dance, dancer, to dance as a religion, literally “life-child” or “little dream”

nesma – distress, upset, to upset

nie – an apostrophe used to separate concepts and phrases in writing (‘)

nikir – pair, to wed, twinned

nira – loneliness, single, one, alone

noreil – secret, a secret

norvio - black

O

o – to, unto, for

o’hena – you’re welcome, of course, literally “because it is (so)”

ona – empress / emperor, lord / lady, ruler of highest status, Current Ruler

ontiel – to radiate outward

o’saerre – a hawk shapeshifter, literally “unto the serpent(s)”

oun – balance, balanced, balancing, to balance

P

pala – earth, dirt, soil, to plant, to bury pan’melos – the most complex of the 13 melos forms of dance, a single dancer working with 10 scarves, but never touching more than one at a time

pata – change, to change, changing, as to trade something for another thing or replace it, not as to become

pallion – to deepen, deep, true

peraine – older (thing, person), to age, old

plena – dumb, stupid, idiot, ignorant, fool, foolish

ptenal – surround, enclose

Q

quean – fire, to burn, hot, to die in a fire

quemak – mongrel, impure, false, half-breed, mixed-blood, untrue

R

ra – child, offspring, creation or idea

rael – rage, to anger, enraged

rahvis – (no known definition yet)

rai – formal ‘she’

rait – formal ‘he’

rakuvra - cobra

rashtanis

ravi – to give or to make something, or to make something happen

raviban – permission, literally “give/make (a) way”

raviheah – teacher, to teach, literally “give/make knowledge/thought”

regre – to show, reveal, visible, displayed

rrasatoth – beloved, lover, to love romantically

rre – rest, relief, healing, restoring, to rest or be healed or sleep, restful, relieving, a healer

rrobhi – to bathe, clean, pure, purified, cleansed

rsh – formal they, them, their, one (hypothetical person, not number), one’s, people, a person, a person’s

rspar – ash, to crumble, crumbling, ashen, like unto ash

S

saerre – a serpent shapeshifter

sakkri – spirit, essence, spirits-as-in-ghosts-or-faeries-or-angels, a form of dance unaccompanied by music and which uses no props (scarves, knives, fire, etc.)

san’Anhamirak – pliancy, to bend, pliant, freedom, abandon, literally “essence of Freedom”

san’asi – a sakkri involving 3 dancers, literally “raising the gods” or “invoking the essence(s) of ___”

sanice – consent, blessing, to bless, to give consent

savirnak – sacrifice, to sacrifice, to give up for another

seatratil – year, yearly, this year

sendra – wet, water, fluid

ser- to approach or come, to linger, to stay; to observe, to watch for the purpose of knowing something; to be like a shadow, shadow, shadowing

sera – dream, literally “future-shadow” or “future-watching”

serdinga – lurker, to lurk, spy, to spy, literally “shadow-following” or “watch-following”

sheeva – cold, to shiver, to be cold

she – now, this moment

she’da – story-dances, the only form of dances accompanied by vocalization, and it is spoken instead of sung

Sheni – time, timely, a time or era, Time (as an entity)

Shre – choice, to choose, chosen, Choice (as an entity)

sine – to leave, gone, to be dismissed

sneska – to shed, to discard, discarded

solilei – fall, to fall, fallen

sotre – to flap (wings)

stankhu – reason, to have a reason

suni – malevolence, evil

T

tacarre – evening, night, good-night, a night-time Good-bye

tara – heat, hot, to be hot

tasa – greed, too much

tasashe – always, formal generic Good-bye, in a ‘see you later’, non-permanent sense, literally “too much time (until we meet again)”

teska – thanks, to ask/request, please, thank-you

thayd – caution, to be cautious

thu’queh – to question, to ask questioningly

ti – to move, mobile

tih – stop, to stop

tipa – to shift, to move

tirna – butterfly, like a butterfly

tisa – too little, not enough, deprivation

toth – love, lovely, loving, loved, beloved

tshin – piece, to shatter, broken

tu - two

tuon – together, to move toward ___

V

valnis – mountain, high place

varl – to give, gift

varl’Nesera – blessing, literally “give dance”

vehl – teardrop, sad, to cry

vehlar – heart, living, alive

vem – blood, to bleed, alive

vem’Ahnleh – a very nasty curse, literally “bleeding Fate”

vemka – bloodless, cowardly, coward, ignoble (not of noble blood), mongrel, half-breed, polluted, impure, weak, weakling

veritas – eye, seeing, to view

vesake – sorry, apology, to apologize, to be sorry, to be or feel guilty

vesara – presence, to have presence, to be present

vino – ocean, sea

vis – taste, possessing flavour, tasty, to taste

W

warum – part, piece, individual, drop, unit

wihfar – birth, to be born

wim – ownership, to own, owner, to control

wimashe – to exist, to go about one’s life, generic formal PERMANENT good-bye, literally “may the future be yours”

wimvi – food, to eat, literally “to own the taste”

Y

yao – lucidity, clarity, clear, to be clear

yarroh – spark, to spark

yelok – to reduce, to lessen

yenna – tower, towers, high place(s), perch, mews (a place where you keep trained falcons for falconry), nest, aerie / eyrie (the nest of a wild bird-of-prey), a noble’s home, fortress, guarded place

Z

zil – fear, to flee, one who flees

zinan – destruction, to destroy

GRAMMAR

There are four standard sentence forms. Remember these abbreviations, okey?

P – prepositional phrase

I – inflective phrase

S – subject phrase

V – verb phrase

O – object phrase

a- plural (“pt”) if necessary [you won’t always be USING a plural, after all]

A – adjective or adverb

N – noun in the prepositional phrase

“nasa” – imperative

Q – question, interrogative

v – truth value (ke, ka, or mir = yes, no, or maybe)

T – tense of the whole sentence

Got all that? Here we go.

P-I-S-V-O    Example:

a’S’A-V’A-A’O

 Example:  pt’heah’heah-heah’heah-heah’heah  

“Thoughtful thoughts think thoughtfully thoughtful thoughts.”

P’N’A-a’S’A-V’A-a’A’O   Example:

I = nasa’v   OR  I  = T’Q’v  Example:

PHRASES

Hehj’hena?  - What happened?

She’hehj-la-ha?  - Am I speaking?

She’hehj’ban-la-ha? – Can I speak?

She’hehj’heah-la-ha? – How do I speak?

She’hehj’hena-la-ha?  - What do I say?

She’hehj’lo-la-ha? – Where do I speak?

She’hehj’rsh-la-ha? – Who is speaking?

She’hehj’mak-la-ha? – Why do I speak?

Shen’hehj-a’la-gen-ha? – Are you speaking to me?

She’hehj’ban-maen’teska-gen-ha’intre? – Could you speak quietly, please?

She’hihj’heah-gen-heah-la’ha? – How do you know I’m speaking?

A’she’hehj’sheni-gen’heah-rai’ha? – When do you think she will speak?

O’she’hehj’lo-gen’he-la’ha?  - Where did you hear me speak?

A’rai-a’she-hehj’rsh-ha? – Who will speak to her?

A’rsh’pt-she’hehj’mak-la-le’ha? – Why do I want to speak to these people?

WRITING SYSTEM

[askiisoft]

FAN ART FRIDAY: Triple Dragons

Imagine dragons. It can be the European winged lizards or the long, windy Asian ones, it doesn’t matter. Now imagine that, like most lizards, it molted its skin every so often. But afterwards, that shedded skin came to life, put on a suit, and started trying to take over the identity of the original, creeping out its friends and war buddies in the process.

That’s the sordid history of Gamma Fifteen, a.k.a “The Dragon of New Mecca”. I think no one behind Katana ZERO imagined he’d become the game’s breakout character, receiving more fan love than the rest of the cast combined. But we’re not here to talk about him...or at least, not just him. Thanks to the raw talent and wild imaginations of fans, there have become at least three different versions of Fifteen in fanon.

So buckle in, because today we’ll be going on an expedition into the urban jungles of the Third District, to get a look at the three species of The Dragon in the wild.

Thanks to @55_yamisan for drawing all the species illustrations below! You can see the original artwork here.

[WARNING: Contains plot spoilers for ‘Katana ZERO’]

Ssshhh. Stay low, and be careful of snapping twigs underfoot. Just through the brush, we can see a juvenile Dragon in its natural habitat. Here, have a look.

Don’t be fooled by his boyish charm—at the tender age of 15, this NULL specimen is already a proficient killing machine. From this juvenile form, a Dragon can eventually grow into one of three different forms depending on its diet, habitat, and artist. 

—

Exhibit A. Here, we have most prolific and successful species of The Dragon. Using his long, spindly legs, he prowls the Earth’s upper atmosphere for small birds, passenger planes, and other prey.

One of the mandates for Katana ZERO’s promotional art was that spoiler characters like Fifteen and Headhunter couldn’t be shown. It was a smart move for hiding the game’s various late-game twists, but as a consequence, fan artists had nothing but his in-game sprites as reference material. 

This led to debates about whether he wore sunglasses or had cat ears, until natural selection produced the perfect assassin; a bishonen-yet-deadly apex predator.

by @IERotAK

I love hatched lines. They’re useful for drawing the eye or adding texture, shadows, and folds without the use of color. Unfortunately, a combination of shitty tablet drivers and my own unsteady hand means I can only draw lines a couple dozen pixels long before they start losing their straightness.

That’s clearly no issue for IEROtAK, who manages to convey the distinct textures of glossy leather gloves, a dark suit, and cold steel using nothing but amazingly neat hatched lines and negative space. The thick webs of intricate lines dazzles the eye from afar before it slowly makes out the clean shapes and low perspective of this masterpiece. Real badasses don’t look at explosions.

by @PsykoShipht

One of the best ways to make dynamic action is by accentuating movement; things like Batman’s cape, Strider Hiryu’s crimson scarf, or Rad Spencer’s dreadlocks billow and sway with their every movement, giving a sense of momentum and a clear line of action. 

PsykoShipht gives Fifteen’s stylish ponytail a life of its own; I can already picture it straightening with each Chronos Rush attack or forming zig-zags and right angles and he navigates platforms. Even Fifteen’s comparatively lanky proportions and clean silhouette scream ‘agility character’ before he even draws his sword.

—

This species is a rare sight in the wild, and thankfully so. His briefcase is lead-lined, so even X-ray scans have been unable to reveal its contents.

It all began in The Concept Art of Katana ZERO and seemingly normal piece of concept art by Kenju, depicting an alternate version of Fifteen bearing a green sheath, green hair, and what looked like mild burn scars on his face. 

by Kenju

Fan artists immediately took the idea and ran with it, inventing a bizarre, disfigured, and delightfully mad doppelgänger—first dubbed “Proto Fifteen″ and later, “The Snake” or “The Serpent”. He carries around that mysterious silver briefcase and a creepy yandere obsession with Fifteen’s old comrade, Zero. 

Is he a failed clone? A bizarro-version from another dimension? And what’s inside that briefcase? We may never know. But the idea of having a stalker with Fifteen’s level of speed and swordsmanship is an utter nightmare...

by @55_yamisan

Why drown a drawing in rainbows when just a few spots of color makes all the difference? 

Adding red eyes to Yami-san’s black-and-white art style immediately leads one’s gaze in a serpentine spiral, from the snake’s glare and up its graceful coils to The Serpent’s cocked head and seductive smirk that distinguish him as the ‘evil twin’. Even without the green in his hair or his signature briefcase, it’s easy to tell this is a totally distinct character from The Dragon. 

Let’s hope Zero can tell the difference, too...

“There’s something important inside.” by @moryu​

When Quentin Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction hit in 1994, everyone had their own guesses about what was inside the ‘mysterious briefcase’. Diamonds. Nuclear launch codes. Perhaps even a human soul.

In this case, however, my guesses are a lot more morbid, as anything The Serpent holds dear is likely slick, smelly, and related to Zero in some way. The way fan artists took a discarded detail from concept art and transformed it into The Serpent’s central conceit is beyond impressive.

I shudder to think of the kinds of reference photos @moryu​ used to achieve such realistic-looking burn scars in this picture. It doesn’t stop there, though; the mottled glow of The Serpent’s suit and hair and dull metallic sheen of his briefcase add an extra dimension of warmth to this otherwise creepy portrait.

—

“The Crocodile” is a relative newcomer to this ecosystem, but has carved out a niche of lifting his prey with a single arm, then drowning them in a toilet or other convenient body of water.

Truth be told, this one’s on me. When drawing some Steam Backgrounds for the game’s PC version, enough time had passed that The Dragon was fair game for publicity material. What I drew ended up like a blood-spattered cross between Clint Eastwood and Owen Wilson.

by @godsavant

This sent shockwaves rippling through the Katana ZERO fan community. Where was the sharply-dressed samurai prince everyone thirsted for? Surely this stomach-kicking, mobster-torturing beefcake couldn’t be him, thus earning him the moniker “The Crocodile” or “The Alligator”: muscular, deadly, and singularly obsessed with revenge.

by @sbserpent

Dragons are a consistent theme in art across many Asian cultures; for example, the Chinese once believed their emperor was descended from dragons, and thus bore their wisdom and benevolence. Here, sbserpent demonstrates just how frightening a human embodiment of a dragon really is.

Where The Dragon carries himself with an air of calculated composure, The Crocodile exudes sheer terror. The thick, angular brush strokes evoke Japanese sumi-e artwork, yet blotchy ink spots and harsh shadows are a far cry from the koi fish and bamboo forests of those traditional paintings. 

by @Zebralineku

Chiaroscuro is a technique that uses bold contrast between light and shadow to leave certain parts for the viewer’s mind to fill in. 

Here, Zebra gives us an imposing film-noir bust of The Crocodile as glimpsed through narrow blinds or a slat in a dark alley: the foreboding red mixed with heavy shadows evoke a hitman staring out at crimson neon signs, and his dark suit mixes with the black background to make him almost a shadow. Yet we can envision the other half of his face and ponytail in our mind’s eye from the scantest details; truly the touch of a master.

—

Remember, the specimens we’ve observed must be viewed from a safe distance; should you spot any of them in the wild, do not approach!

If you’d like some artwork featured on a future Fan Art Friday, just use the Submit Button on this blog!

by @Kazzang3

[ben-the-hyena]

How are skekSil & urSol in the native to Thra AU?

Ok so long post ahead since 2 biographies lol

First SkekSil :

SkekSil was raised by his mother alone, a nouveau riche that made a fortune by screwing around as a gold digger, seducing and ruining lives, ending up with all the riches of those he seduced. Even though SkekSil was not planned, he decided to keep without ever telling the father (his most recent victim he ruined) and adored him. He spoiled his son, rarely told him no, gave him everything he wanted and kept praising him whenever he could, telling him nobody mattered but them and that whenever he could have the opportunity to climb the social ladder to take it whatever the price, and teaching him how to lie and manipulate telling him it was perfectly normal to use people to their advantage. Little SkekSil thus grew as a brat with "friends" that were jist useful to him and with a huge ego determined to have more, because he was taught he deserved, OWNED more

His mother having been a dancer, he taught him from a young age many moves and gym prowesses both for celebrations and seduction. As he grew up, he found himself more and more beautiful (which didn't help his ego at all) just like his mother had planned, so he decided to become the Dancer, dancing seductively often almost naked in high society salons, bedding some important Skeksis and remembering theit secrets from the pillow talk, he would remember all of them in case of any new scheme. He entered in the court when the Ritual Master was looking for ritualistic dancers for a the ritualistic Dance of the Fans needed for a traditional celebration. He convinced SkekZok to take him in after having shown him a "private show" displaying his talents... Once there, SkekSil was determined to be well seen by the courtiers and as provocative as ever, already seeing who was attracted, the Emperor himself was. And indeed, he passed the night with him... that was how he became a member of the court. In 20 trines, after sleeping around with almost everyone in the castle and of course using his brains to manipulate and have political favours as well as the sexual favours, he became the Chamberlain. Only 4 Skeksis didn't enter in his bed : SkekTek because he was ace anyway, SkekEkt and SkekAyuk because they were a couple already, and more importantly : SkekUng. That was very frustrating. He smelled and felt he lusted iver him and yet he rejected him. He was one of the only Skeksis in the castle to read through him and know it was for his ruses so he kept rejecting him. SkekSil should have just shrugged him off like he did with the 3 others, especially since he was a mere Military Surgeon and then Captain back then, nothing he could gain from... and yet being REJECTED, how he saw there was potential since he was obviously attracted too but denied it his flirts sometimes backfiring in fights if not a short flirt in return, how they both were ambitious and he reproached him of not working but whore around for climbing society, and how he actually found him hot too... that had him be almost obsessed with him and they became rivals. Rivals with a huge sexual tension until the time between one becoming Chamberlain and the other becoming Spy Master when SkekSil found about SkekUng's childhood. Contrary to the canon continuity, and as evil and unscrupulous as he is, SkekSil in this AU had such a great relationship with his mom when he was younger the idea of children being abused by their parents just makes him sick and he had enough standard to never use that to his advantage, so the fact it happened to the one guy he found hot had him feel sympathy towards him, and they tried going on better terms this time genuinely (stillbeingrivalsforstatussincetheybothwantedpowerofcourse) becoming allies until their attraction turnt into love and they dated before becoming mates trines later (his mother wasn't angry at his commitment. Just disappointed) and many trines later got twin sons together. SkekSil absolutely adored them and spoiled them and intended to have them like his mother raised him, but with a military dad who kept having their feet firmly on the ground and his ferocious military training (source of marital conflict) had them not grow a head as big as their mom's. Only another son they would have just before menopause striked wouldn't take the military path much to his relief.They would also get 3 grandchildren in future trines, SkekSil adoring them too but LOATHING his in-laws for stealing his babies

In fact, SkekSil's brooding mother instincts are the motivation for a lot of things in that reality. He is extremely worried and protective about his descendants, and thus almost fainted when his sons joined the imperial army and is scared of 2 of his grandchildren keep considering joining it later, trying to manipulate them into choosing something else which leads to conflict with SkekUng who encourage it. SkekSil completely opposed the Gelfling war not for the issue of running out of essence eventually, but fearing any war and wishing to be in perpetual peace since wherever there would be a war, his sons woulf risk tjeir lives by being sent there. Naturally like in the show, he is mocked for his diplomatic attempts at keeping peace, and the Emperor, determined and wanting action instead of words, has SkekVar the General take his place, having SkekSil desiring his seat back and planning to become friends with him to kill him better to take his revenge... but also yet again for his broody mother instincts. For centuries ago, SkekVar had sent his sons on a very dangerous mission, and one almost died, being unconscious for days and still having a huge scar over his eye to this day. SkekSil swore that day he would pay, he just needed the right moment... being on the same battlefield together did sound like the righr moment. And that death even had its own avantage ! His mate got a promotion, becoming the new General. He just didn't need to know the real reason why

When SkekSo died, finally not only this meaningless war could come to an end, but it could be the moment he could reach the pinacle of power. Be Emperor. The ultimate position. But sadly for him, SkekUng won the Trial by Stone. After all his efforts he couldn't just stay a mere Consort ! So mate or not mate, he jumped on every occasion to topple him over... until it worked ! SkekSil the First ! SkekUng was now his consort, and he could stop that UrRu war he had started if that meabt have his babies safe- wait he toppled him over too ? Aaand that's how I explained on SkekUng's post : they confused the whole kingdom and the war was on hold for like forever because they were too busy with coups against each other. Until SkekUng died of old age 4 centuries later, so very old SkekSil finally became the one and only Emperor. But without fighting with his spithead, it didn't feel the same... he died of old age he too, about 11 trines after SkekUng

UrSol now !

UrSol was born in a sweet noble family, very sick and weak he almost died many times until he became a toddler. When he reached that age and he finally felt good, he sang out his joy in relief. That was the first time he sang. His parents wdre so relieved he felt good and amazed by how melodious and celestial his chanting sounded they took it as a sign of Thra. They immediatly signed him in a religious choral, training him for trines. Little UrSol loved the attention and was sollicited for a lot of child events such as school or rites, but all if that ended up having him get stress out. But he didn't dare upset his parents and all of his "fans", so he went with it

...until teenhood where he snapped and becalz quite rebellioud. Sneaking out, skipping lessons and concerts, singing unholy things, being as cheeky and less faithful to UrRu tradition as he was supposed to be... That was when he found out he liked being a flirt and a tease as well as a jokester, not in a mean way of course. This was after that long period of rebellion his parents ultimately accepted he wanted to leave that choral and let him do whatever he wanted. Relieved, he became sweeter again (keeping his new flirty joking habits however) and decided to sing whatever he liked whenever he liked. He still sang a lot since he loved it but by himself. That had him get noticed by Master UrSu who, charmed, hired him as a Chanter. UrSol accepted with one condition, he got to sing whatever he wanted. In the court, UrSol got along with almost everyone, even if his free-spirited ways (not as much as UrVa and UrGoh at least) and how he could flirt around with them tended to annoy around. But most of the time, he didn't care what they thought. He did whatever made him happy... and there was notably one UrRu making him happy : UrIm the Healer. How could such a nerd be so handsome, and such an intelligent medic so naive ?! And when he thought he managed to get away from that Skeksis captain that tried killing him and got him trappes... a hero ! Sadly for him he never got all the hints UrSol did to have him seduced, in fact he even started scolding him wheb he reproached him to come when he wasn't sick. After some trines, UrSol gave up and simply kissed him. Naive UrIm realized THAT was what he wanted after all and thinking he restrained himself from flirting back because in his naivety he had no idea he was interested him, they immediatly dated. Trines later they would become mates, trines later get fake twins (they got each other pregnant around the same time and went in labor the same day) and many trines later get one grandchild. A cute supportive family

When UrSu died and his children had abdicated, UrIm was chosen to become the new Master. He was very nervous, he who was just a healer and who just found out that that one captain he had trapped became the new Skeksis emperor and wanted a war between them, but at least UrSol was on his side, as his consort and advisor, reassuring him and being there for him. In the end, nobody died from that war thanks to the coups in the Skeksis empire... UrSol almost killed SkekUng in rage when he came to try murder him one century later, though, but seeing how UrIm STILL fooled him made him love him even more. How could he be so clueless yet so cunning at once !? UrSol would die of old age 3 centuries later, some trines before his mate

SkekSil and UrSol met 2 times in their life, with big tension and disdain but they didn't want to get their hands dirty by fighting. The first time was when they were young adults, meeting as both courts were invited by the All Maudra. Jealous of his beautiful chanting, SkekSil challenged him to chant as fast as he could dance with notes fitting all of his moves. Challenge accepted... and he did it. And sounded beautiful, a beautiful show to Gelflings. SkekSil just huffed and for once didn't talk for the remaining of the night, pouting in a corner. The second time was when SkekSil, emperor for the moment, came to negociate UrRu prisonners in exchange of his prisonner mate. They both shared a loooong glare and a venomous discussion about how much their mates either tried to hurt or humiliated theirs

[muses-darling]

A Seduction of the Darkside - A Star Wars AU - CH. 7 Drifting

Ignis sat meditating reaching out with the force, even Sith meditated, but this was more than meditation, he was searching for someone. So when he arrived at the hellish place that was his birth planet the planet of Mustafar he wondered at how they could have come to be here: Mustafar hadn’t always been a planet of churning bubbling lava. There had once been a lushness so deep and vast that would have rivaled even Naboo or Alderaan. However due to love and the loss of one loved it had become fire. Much like him, Those events predated even him. He walked along the crumbling volcanic rock looking up he saw a clear line of division, on the other side was a fecundity, the lushness he knew already, Alderaan? But how were the two places so merged? Was that where Kit was staying? Or were they at each other’s hearts? He saw the other man sitting before him peaceful, “Kit?”

Kit looked up from where he sat coming to a standing position at seeing him, “Lord Ignis.” 

Ignis felt a bit of sorrow he had hoped Kit would have called him Hades, he found he liked the sound of his birth name being formed by that man’s perfect tongue, those lips forming the syllables. “Hello Kit.” He smiled walking to the edge of their worlds. 

“How?” Kit asked. 

“The force? It has many abilities, many I would have showed you had you stayed.” Ignis told him. “Why? Why didn’t you stay?”

“It wasn’t where the force lead me,” Kit admitted. 

“Jedi always doing as you are told.” Ignis shook his head. 

“I am of the force and it flows through me.” Kit told him. 

“And through me,” There was something different about Kit in the time away from him. “What power I could have shown you the darkside is so much stronger than the light.”

“No,” Kit said calmly, “Neither side is stronger than the other, yes there is dark and yes there is light but there is so much more than that.”

Ignis frowned, “What have you learned Kit?” He reached forward through the barrier towards Kit.

Kit saw the hand and raised his hand the blade extending from it was pure white. 

Ignis’ eyes looked down at the blade eyes widening, he knew that crystal, “My Kyber Crystal? But how?”

“It wasn’t easy healing it, the torment done unto that crystal was beyond anything I’ve ever seen,” Kit held up the sword for Ignis to look over. 

“It took time, lot’s of time, and lots of love.” Kit spoke tears falling from his face.

Such emotion, but that was not the Jedi way? Yet Kit seemed more in control of his emotions he sensed sadness but it didn’t consume him, Ignis felt himself take a step back. “What have you learned?” His hand still remained up.

Kit lowered his blade and held up his hand, “There is so much more to the force Hades. There is more than the darkness, there is more than the light, the force is both the force is more than we make of it.”

Ignis’ fingers gently touched the tips of Kit’s as their hands entwined. “Kit,” He breathed the man’s name.

Kit held to his hand. “Hades.”

Hades’ eyes softened from their Sith nature into the gentle blues that they once had been, “You are never far from my thoughts, my dreams.” Hades admitted as looked him over then his attention was caught behind Kit and fear real fear came to Hade’s face. “Kit you need to go!”

The smile turned to a frown, “Go?”

“Kit I beg of you go!” Hades said his eyes becoming Sith like again. “GO!” Ignis shot forward from where he had been meditating. Kit! Kit was in danger! He stood up shakily. How had he come to care for the Jedi? 

________________________________________________________________

Kit had become aware of the lightsaber humming behind him his hand shot out his newly formed lightsaber the one that bore Hades’ Kyber Crystal came to life. He brought it up blocking the blow of the assailant. “Lord Vesania!”

“Hello Jedi.” Vesania grinned lightning crackled down the body and at Kit.

Kit blocked with the force, then returned with yellow lightning.

“Oooh you learned some tricks, I wonder how your precious Jedi friends will feel when they learn you fell to the darkside before your death.”

“I’ve not fallen,” Kit shook his head. “I have achieved balance.” Kit spoke softly. “True balance.” He held up his blade ready for Vesania’s next move 

Vesania’s eyes widened before he let out a belly aching laugh. “You really think you can stop me with so small a burst of lightning? Oh you Jedi are really stupid. Have a taste of real power.” 

The air around Kit thrummed with energy before crackles echoed about his ear. Kit closed his eyes and let the energy build before force pushing all of it at Vesania.

Vesania landed hard as all the lightning coarsed through him repelled back at him. 

Kit moved towards him standing over the Sith his blade at the man’s throat. “Yield.”

“Never,” Vesania reached out through the force and sent a brick at Kit who spun slicing it from himself. Vesania took the opportunity to leave the room.

_

“Track Lord Vesania’s ship.”

“Yes my Emperor,” an attendant began looking through the data pad in their hand. “He is on the Moon Yavin Four.” 

Not far, but was he close enough? Ignis had to wonder as he boarded his personal ship. “I will return in my absence continue as we have.”

_

Kit hurried after Lord Vesania summoning out his second blade. They clashed in the great central room of the temple. 

Lord Vesania lifted up a huge chunk of fallen ceiling with the force hurtling it at Kit.

Kit shattered it sending the multitude of pieces at Lord Vesania.

Vesania threw up a projection of the force unable to block all of it dropping to his feet as blood flowed from where he had been struck. “Clever little Jedi, you have learned much in our time apart, but it is all for not. See that you are alone.” Vesania cackled. “Your petty attempts at bringing me down will do nothing! Does this anger you little Jedi? Good taste the anger what real anger feels like. Look into my eyes little Jedi.”

Kit knew better than to look at Vesania’s eyes, tales of a dark sith who could with the look in their eyes kill with the hatred they held. Kit reached out with the force instead finding the vines that grew along the ceiling and walls and began flooding them with the force encouraging their growth till they were long enough, “I think you will find I can always find friends.” Kit smiled as vines twisted and wrapped around Vesania’s limbs constraining him. 

Footfalls behind him told him other’s approached. “Thank the force we are not too late.” Aziraphale said brandishing a blade and looking to Crowley. “We were examining the library at a nearby temple when we sensed him. Are you alright Kit?”

“Nothing a bit of Bacta and meditation can’t help.” Kit gave a winning smile. 

Vesania’s blade became a whirlwind cutting away the vines. “I’M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU JEDI!”

Crowley’s blade extended, “Aww just when things were looking a little wrapped up.”

Kit and the other two encircled the Sith keeping a distance and watching him. 

Vesania lunged at Crowley only to realize that it was actually Aziraphale.

 “My dear boy don’t you know it’s not nice to attack one’s elders.” He chastised him meeting the Sith’s blade before reaching up with his hand to Vesania’s forehead. A blinding light came from his hand over Vesania’s eyes blinding him.

Vesania moved back then stood ready, “If you think this momentary darkness frightens me, you are truly foolish old man. I was born in the dark, raised in it, and it powers me.”

Aziraphale rolled his eyes as well as his head in annoyance stepping silently around Vesania and pressing the button on the Sith’s lightsaber as he pulled it from his hands. “Then you should be able to see that you are beaten.”

Crowley moved closer to help apprehend the Sith Lord his foot landing not so quietly.

Vesania’s head jerked and he raised his arm the all too familiar crackling of energy surged out but it wasn’t Crowley who took the brunt of it.

“AZIRAPHALE!” Crowley’s eyes widened as he watched his beloved take all of it the whole blast his body shuddering and falling Crowley caught him looking up at the man, “YOU BASTARD!” He set Aziraphale down gently.

Kit felt his green blade leave his hand as Dark energy swirled around Crowley.

“Master Crowley.”

“GET HIM OUT OF HERE, THIS LITTLE BOY ISSSSS GOING TO LEARN A LESSSSON,” The roof above began cracking.

Kit used the force to help him get Aziraphale out of there. Outside he saw why the temple was cracking as a meteor pulled from the stars above came through the top of the temple.  “Master Crowley.” He set Aziraphale down in the ship’s med bay hooking him up to a feed of bacta and hurrying back out narrowly dodging pieces of the temple as they were flung into the jungle. “MASTER CROWLEY!” He held up his hands as dust flew around himself. 

Crowley stood in the destructing temple Vesania’s corpse at his feet, Crowley was not a fighter, but when it came to Aziraphale. Aziraphale! He looked up and saw Kit, “Azirphale?” He asked weakly.

“He’s alive, he needs time to heal, so do you. We need to leave. I sense more coming this way. Master Crowley.” Kit reached out gently taking Crowley’s arm.

Crowley looked up at him and for a moment he almost saw the small blonde child with green eyes as big as the twin moons of Lothal. 

“Master Crowley?” Little Kit asked walking up to Crowley in the garden. “None of the other younglings will train with me, can I stay here in the garden with you?”

Crowley turned to little Kit and smiled, “I’d like that very much Kit.”

Kit beamed up at him always a sunny child, a kind one with a bright future. 

Crowley continued watering the pants.

“Can I help you?”

Kids needed something to do, being still was something learned over time not instantly understood. “Yes of course young Kit, let me know if you find any plants that have any spots on them.” 

Kit nodded, “Yes Master Crowley!” He hurried off before long his small voice could be heard shouting. “I FOUND ONE! I FOUND ONE!” He jumped up and down waving the Master down.

Crowley walked over to him and smiled down at him. “Well now let’s see what kind of spot that it is?” He frowned clearly displeased.

“Did I do something wrong?” Kit asked.

“No Kit I’m disappointed in this plant for not being of a fortitude to stand up to sunspots.” Crowley’s fingers took hold of the plant only to be interrupted by the child crying. “What is it?”

“You’re not going to kill it are you?” Kit asked eyes welling up with tears looking up at him. “Surely it could learn from this? Get better and never do it again! It just needs to be healed.” 

“I’m sure you are right Kit, perhaps Master Aziraphale can help when he is available, he is a master healer.” Crowley nodded. 

Kit smiled clearly happy with this. 

Crowley knew that the moment Kit was gone that the plant would be removed from the garden before it could taint any other plants. “Kit want me to show you something you can do with the plants and the Force?”

Crowley was pulled from his reverie as they entered Hyperspace looking over he saw Aziraphale resting peacefully already looking less injured by Vesania’s lighting. His eyes looked to Kit who was piloting the ship.

“You blacked out,” Kit told him, there was already Sith Imperial ships arriving we made it through I don’t know how.” Kit shook his head as he neared where Aziraphale lay. “He’ll heal just fine, he always was a Master Healer you always said so.”

Crowley smiled, “I saw the vines, well done Kit seems you practiced when we weren’t together training.”

Kit beamed feeling chuffed at the compliment. “Well I’ve had three amazing masters teach me what they have, something had to stick.” 

Crowley nodded sitting back down his hand going to Aziraphale’s, “I think I’m going to stay here for a while.”

“Of course,” Kit told him. “There is fresh tea brewed up if you want it.”

“Perhaps something stronger?”

“I’ll see what there is.” Kit nodded. “Rest well Master Crowley.”

Crowley nodded hearing Kit’s footsteps fade before he looked to Azirphale, “You shouldn’t have done that angel,” He smoothed Aziraphale’s hair. “It could have killed you, from what it looks like it nearly did. You are a bastard you know that,” He told Aziraphale tucking him in as he lay beside him on the medical bed. “Thank you.” He never said those last two words when anyone could hear them.

“You’re welcome.” Aziraphale said eyes opening a smile on his face as he squeezed his husband’s hand.

“Aziraphale!” Crowley turned and pulled him to him. “What the bloody-do-you-even!-What-was!-I-thought-you-you-had-don’t-you-ever-do-that-again!”

“I can’t make any promises,” Aziraphale smiled kissing the tip of Crowley’s nose. “But I will do my best if you will do yours to keep out of danger.”

“Oh Angel.” Crowley shook his head resting his forehead against Aziraphale’s. “Aziraphale.”

“I love you.” 

“Not as much as I you.”

[gloamingroamingfish]

I’ve got nowhere else to ramble about this really, so here, have my opinions and predictions about all the The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance characters revealed in this article from Newsweek., under a cut because it’ll be long. Uh, possible spoilers for a 40 year old movie? Or the series itself, on the off chance my theories are right? All photos can be seen in the article itself, this post is already long enough. Here we go.

Aughra

Can’t say I won’t miss her original voice, but Aughra’s new VA sounds like she’s going to do just as well, and might even be better suited to the miniseries than the voice from the original movie would be-- a short 80s fantasy flick is a different animal after all. This Aughra has a more complicated costume, which I like, she looks very scholarly, and she also a bit taller, or least less stooped. Yellow’s a good color for her. I just hope her trusty eye’s still removable.

Rian

I remember this character from back when the Henson Company threw a contest to find the author of a new Dark Crystal novel. He was the suggested protagonist, and it was around this time they fleshed out some things about the matriarchal Gelfling society, too. It looks like in this series he keeps his role as a Crystal Castle guard who discovers the Skeksis’ horrid secret and kicks off everything that happens next. He does resemble Jen a lot, which I think is a good thing. The designers knew their baseline. That is a quintessential Gelfling right there.

Gurjin

But of course with a whole Gelfling society to focus on instead of just two of them, they have to decide what variation in Gelflings looks like. This is a great start. I trust this guy. He looks level headed and capable. Probably lets Rian do most of the talking.

Maudra Fara

She looks kind of young for a Gelfling clan matriarch, but maybe there’s a reason for that. There will be a war in this show (that the Gelflings have to lose in order for the movie to happen). Maybe her mother was killed in battle. Fara gives me a “lost one or both parents” vibe.

Naia

Only says that she is Gurjin’s twin. Her name is ringing a bell, was she in another spinoff thing? TDC’s had a surprising amount of those.

Brea

I think I’ve seen her described as a “princess”. But one who can read, based on a photo that’s out! I can’t wait to see Gelfling books. I don’t have many solid impressions of her right now.

Deet

I can’t. She’s. Too cute. My gosh. She is just the right amount of fey and mop-topped and probably psychic. I love her and she reminds me of Kira, who was arguably a better Gelfling hero than Jen was (much love to Jen though).

I also appreciated hearing her speak in the trailer, because she used the same cadence as from the original film, same rhythms and word choices. It sounds like that’s a choice that’s been made across the script, which is a relief because it would have been really jarring to hear these characters speak the way modern screenwriters would make other fantasy tv characters speak, instead of that 80s puppet accent they need.

Tavra

Another weirdly familiar name. I don’t have any ideas about her role, really. I will say that on certain Gelfling ladies, you can see where the designers let the Gelfling baseline slip a bit. Some of them are just a bit too elfin and pretty for my tastes, I like them better when they sit further back in comfortably uncanny territory.

All-Maudra

Yes, this looks exactly like the Gelfing you’d expect Helena Bonham Carter to voice (I did think she was doing a Skeksis though!). Kind of puts me in the mind of a medieval noblewoman; from the info, it’s not clear if she’s literally the queen of all the clans, or just a figurehead, but she does function as a sort of diplomat to the Castle who specializes in dealing with the Skeksis... and from her clothes I’d say they’re rubbing off a little bit. (Is it just me, or does her crown sort of mirror the decorative spikes on the Emperor’s carapace?)

Oh no, what if she’s in cahoots? I can’t imagine consorting with Skeksis all the time is healthy for one’s morals...

Onica

Weirdly tricky to wrap my head around the idea of a Gelfling with curly hair and freckles, but Onica’s cute. Are they one of the sea sailing Gelflings?

Cadia

Gelfling with a beard. Alright. I guess that’s possible. I’ll bet he’s Onica’s uncle or dad or something. I like his face, I hope I like him. He looks like comic relief.

Rek’yr

No idea what to make of this guy. Why is his name different than the others? Is he a leader of an army or some kind of lone wolf?

You know, there are likely going to be Gelflings on both sides of this conflict. the Skeksan status quo is bound to be seductive to at least some of them. Because why not make this story crueler by letting some Gelfling be complicit in their own kind’s destruction?

Librarian

Ha. Nerd. I like his big hat. Which library are we visiting? The Scroll-Keeper’s? Or someone else’s?

Kylan

Okay, this one’s just straight inscrutable. What is that expression? Why are their clothes weirdly plain and red compared to everyone else’s? Red’s not really a Gelfling color. Am I just being paranoid or is there something up with this one?

They remind me of the Chamberlain and I have no idea why???

Seladon

No info here, either. Not listed as a Maudra, but is probably still powerful as Gelflings go. Perhaps connected to the All-Maudra? They seem related.

Ordon

Think I saw this guy in the trailer wielding a weapon. He has the look of an army man out to prove himself in battle only to valiantly sacrifice his life later. Suspiciously specific theory? Yeah, probably.

Mira

Another slightly too pretty Gelfling lady. I’m sure she’s fine. Next.

Maudra Argot

Utterly delightful grandma Gelf. This must be Deet’s Maudra; I adore her floppy hat and classy silver embroidery. She looks like she would offer her loved ones milk and cookies one second and kick Garthim beetle butt the next. I’m sure she speaks her mind, look at that defiant little chin jut. I love.

Hup

Podling!!! Yes I am most pleased this show will feature Potato People. Nothing bad had better happen to Hup.

Baffi

Dave Goelz returns to play a shrieking fluffball! We can’t not have a fizzgig. Fizzgigs all look the same so naturally the crew could only think to give Baffi here a sick eyepatch to set him apart. I approve!

Okay, here’s what I know you scrolled all the way down for! It’s time for our favorite decrepit decadent dinosaurs, starting with...

skekUng, the General

I almost hope this is not in fact skekUng, because this is frankly disappointing. Who is this??? It doesn’t resemble the guy from the original movie even a little bit. I know he would have lost weight in some places and gained it in others, I know it might just be a bad angle, but I can’t find anything in common between the two faces. His teeth are in the wrong place, his beak is the wrong shape, that’s not what his smug expression looks like--I remember him being slightly desperate even when he was winning--he doesn’t have his grizzled hair, or, more importantly, his expressive bushy eyebrows-- I refuse to accept that this is “just what he looked like when he was younger”. This is a totally different Skeksis! Who are you and what have you done with the General!

Even the armor is wrong! It’s supposed to be all bulky and beetle-like, like the Garthim, even with liftable wing-like parts, here it looks loosely ‘inspired’ but still flat and nondescript. Everyone else looks so good and almost just like themselves, crew, what went wrong here? Am I missing something?

Maybe I’m just upset because Ung’s the only one I’ve ever encountered in person. This isn’t even a bad Skeksis design, I’d actually like it quite a bit if it weren’t for the fact that it’s not him.

The Collector

Hello, who is this! I’d almost mistake this charming forest ogre for one of the “good guys” if their Skeksis-ness wasn’t so obvious. I love the silver and grey fabrics, the beaded hood and the mossy necklace of bottles, filled with...herbs? Did some kind of incident with forest plants cause that fungus-like growth/scarring on their face? It adds so much to their facial silhouette.

There was a character in the spinoff manga called skekLach the Collector, but he looked completely different from this Skeksis, much meaner and more imposing. I doubt this one is the same character or even that they have the same name; it would seem that the Henson Company has declared the manga Collector an AU version and retooled the character concept into someone different. I see this Collector as being like a sort of deadly apothecary, brewing potions and poisons from specimens they collect beyond the castle. 10/10 wicked-witchy birb.

skekAyuk, the Gourmand

Still the same old palace chef, sitting there looking like a Renaissance still life gone wrong; his clothes are in much, much better condition though, and you can see his quite unsettling lower teeth which remind me of a pig’s teeth, thanks a lot Henson Co. I know there’s no way you could have know I have a fear of pigs but now I’m all caught up in what I used to be scared the hog in the backyard would do if it caught me and moving on before I freak myself out, okay, very nice teeth there yes--

skekTek, the Scientist

Minus a few blood tubes, plus a few fangs, it’s nothing but a pleasure to see this guy back from his, uh... fate, in the movie. And given that the Skeksis’ precious vliya life fluid is looking like a huge plot point in the series, skekTek here is probably going to figure in the plot quite a lot himself, hooray! He’s going to be played by the inimitable Mark Hamill, who is probably enjoying getting to play slightly against type by being a subdued, schemy, sciencey villain rather than a loud hammy one, and it is going to be amazing.

The Hunter

Heard of this guy! skekMal, I think it was. Dresses in masks designed to frighten and confuse his prey--often Gelflings--during night hunting trips. The deep blue mixes well with the red to keep even his hunting outfit appropriately regal looking. The way I hear it, they have no idea he is in fact a Skeksis, and he has become the subject of terrifying stories told around the fire. Would not want to see this monster bearing down on me in the middle of the night, hellbent on claiming my skull as a hunting trophy.

skekSo, the Emperor

That is the most punchable face I have ever seen on a bird in my life.

But seriously, it’s great to see old skekSo somewhere other than his deathbed. Can’t wait to see what despicable things he gets up to in his prime. He kind of reminds me of a knight, the same way the All-Maudra reminds me of a medieval lady.

(That is totally the face of someone who scarred a generation of children for life by graphically crumbling into dust, and knows it.)

skekZok, the Ritual-Master

Well done resurrecting this particular design, this one’s not easy! I always liked how his head looked almost disembodied in the red velvet cupola of his carapace, and they nailed that penetrating icy blue stare of his, too. They even added to the skull-like effect by giving him a handful of brown, skeletal teeth. Brr.

Base on what I remember of skekZok’s voice, I wish Keegan-Michael Key good luck in reproducing it, although I trust him to bring his own flair to the character like Donna Kimball does with Aughra, too.

skekSil, the Chamberlain

Poor Chamberlain! You look as old and worn as you ever did, just slightly less bald. Oh, well, you’ll survive. You always do.

He’s got a specific vulture hook to his beak that I hope they remade accurately, I can’t tell at this angle, but he looks pretty much just like himself so far, almost like he wandered off the 1981 set and onto the 2019 one. The most important part of his face is his eyes, so I desperately hope the crew put in extra effort where it counts for him, expressionistically. I think we can expect to see plenty of this slimy, conniving old bureaucrat bird in the series, and his trademark skin-crawling whimper too, which it sounds like Simon Pegg’s been practicing in a mirror. I’ve seen Pegg voice act before, so I’m confident he’ll do a good job here. Have fun, Mr. Pegg!

The Heretic

Is that a huge nail through their...

...hey, wait a minute, I recognize this one!

They’re from an old piece of Froud concept art from early in production, when they were still nailing down a species look for Skeksis. It kind of puts me in the mind of a tropical fish. On the real puppet, though, it looks less like natural markings and more like face paint. Their clothes look un-Skeksis-like, too, more like urRu Mystic clothes than anything, although I doubt a Mystic would wear fur. That’s the sign of the Great Conjunction hanging on their chest. What is the source of this one’s heresy? Did they go try to live in the Valley of the Stones after rejecting the Emperor’s dominion over the Dark Crystal? Does it have anything to do with the nail in their head?

skekEkt, the Ornamentalist

And here’s the Castle’s resident fashionista and interior designer, looking pretty well, considering. Better kept clothes and better done makeup, at any rate. I kind of miss the caked on powder, the slathered on gold foil on his beak, and the awful and ashy clumped mascara. But I’m sure he appreciates knowing this prequel’s been very kind to him in the costuming department. Looking good, skekEkt.

skekOk, the Scroll-Keeper

skekOk didn’t have much to do or say in the movie, being just a shorter-than-average Skeksis who kept the records, when he remembered to. I’m glad to see they’ve updated his crocodilian face to be more expressive this time around, he was always one of my favorite designs.

Supposedly, Jim Henson once saw a children’s book in which a crocodile was taking a bath in an ornate bathtub. Something about seeing a hulking reptile in such fancy surroundings made the wheels in his head turn, and the earliest concepts for what would eventually become the Dark Crystal were born. skekOk in particular brings that story to mind.

(I love his sardonic “oh really?” expression in the article I’m looking at. These birds are going to have so much more room for their personalities.)

And then the article shows one single urRu Mystic:

The Archer

I believe their name is urVa. The Mystics tend to defend their Valley through song, but an extra line of defense can’t hurt, and archery can be a very meditative art. The Archer almost looks too active for a Mystic, his eyes just too wide and his fingers too nimble, but there must have been a time when the Mystics weren’t so ponderously slow and forgetful. Seeing the clear eyes and nostrils in their own beak (or beak-like mouth) really makes plain the connection between Skeksis and Mystics, when in the movie it came almost by surprise (but still made sense.) It will be interesting to meet a Mystic like this.

And that’s everyone in the revealed cast, leaving skekNa the Slave-Master and skekShod the Treasurer out of the original Skeksis, and all of the original Mystics, all un-accounted for in the article I read. The show will come out on August 30th. Fingers crossed it’ll be a unique but great experience!