#the real sansa and tyrion
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Sansa doesn’t accept Sweetrobin as her suitor but she accepts Tyrion? Did you read the books? This is another nail in the ashford theory’s coffin besides the obvious fact that lady Ashford didn’t marry her suitors and valarr married another lady and soon died
you’re right, you’re right. instead sansa is going to marry sandor because dunk disturbed the tourney or whatever copium is it that you lot snort
#whe- when did I ever say sansa accepts tyrion as a suitor?#he’s literally her husband???#the narrative pushes him?????#you’re right I haven’t read the books#I just like to stir shit up in the fandom & leave#also jeez i hope valarr’s theory contemporary is not dead#that would be a real shocker#hey! wait!#anyway#I’m tired of this grandpa#anon hate mail ♥️#ashford theory#jonsa#asoiaf#anon asks t#leave me alone please leave me alone#anti sansan
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oooh please someday tell us what you think of GOT
oh, no, it's my fatal weakness! it's [checks notes] literally just the bare modicum of temptation! okay you got me.
SO. in order to tell what's wrong with game of thrones you kind of have to have read the books, because the books are the reason the show goes off the rails. i actually blame the showrunners relatively little in proportion to GRRM for how bad the show was (which I'm not gonna rehash here because if you're interested in GOT in any capacity you've already seen that horse flogged to death). people debate when GOT "got bad" in terms of writing, but regardless of when you think it dropped off, everyone agrees the quality declined sharply in season 8, and to a certain extent, season 7. these are the seasons that are more or less entirely spun from whole cloth, because season 7 marks the beginning of what will, if we ever see it, be the Winds of Winter storyline. it's the first part that isn't based on a book by George R.R. Martin. it's said that he gave the showrunners plot outlines, but we don't know how detailed they were, or how much the writers diverged from the blueprint — and honestly, considering the cumulative changes made to the story by that point, some stark divergence would have been required. (there's a reason for this. i'll get there in a sec.)
so far, i'm not saying anything all that original. a lot of people recognized how bad the show got as soon as they ran out of Book to adapt. (I think it's kind of weird that they agreed to make a show about an unfinished series in the first place — did GRRM figure that this was his one shot at a really good HBO adaptation, and forego misgivings about his ability to write two full books in however many years it took to adapt? did he think they would wait for him? did he not care that the series would eventually spoil his magnum opus, which he's spent the last three decades of his life writing? perplexing.) but the more interesting question is why the show got bad once it ran out of Book, because in my mind, that's not a given. a lot of great shows depart from the books they were based on. fanfiction does exactly that, all the time! if you have good writers who understand the characters they're working with, departure means a different story, not a worse one. now, the natural reply would be to say that the writers of GOT just aren't good, or at least aren't good at the things that make for great television, and that's why they needed the books as a structure, but I don't think that's true or fair, either. books and television are very different things. the pacing of a book is totally different from the pacing of a television show, and even an episodic book like ASOIAF is going to need a lot of work before it's remotely watchable as a series. bad writers cannot make great series of television, regardless of how good their source material is. sure, they didn't invent the characters of tyrion lannister and daenerys targaryen, but they sure as hell understood story structure well enough to write a damn compelling season of TV about them!
so but then: what gives? i actually do think it's a problem with the books! the show starts out as very faithful to the early books (namely, A Game of Thrones and A Clash of Kings) to the point that most plotlines are copied beat-for-beat. the story is constructed a little differently, and it's definitely condensed, but the meat is still there. and not surprisingly, the early books in ASOIAF are very tightly written. for how long they are, you wouldn't expect it, but on every page of those books, the plot is racing. you can practically watch george trying to beat the fucking clock. and he does! useful context here is that he originally thought GOT was going to be a trilogy, and so the scope of most threads in the first book or two would have been much smaller. it also helps that the first three books are in some respects self-contained stories. the first book is a mystery, the second and third are espionage and war dramas — and they're kept tight in order to serve those respective plots.
the trouble begins with A Feast for Crows, and arguably A Storm of Swords, because GRRM starts multiplying plotlines and treating the series as a story, rather than each individual book. he also massively underestimated the number of pages it would take him to get through certain plot beats — an assumption whose foundation is unclear, because from a reader's standpoint, there is a fucke tonne of shit in Feast and Dance that's spurious. I'm not talking about Brienne's Riverlands storyline (which I adore thematically but speaking honestly should have been its own novella, not a part of Feast proper). I'm talking about whole chapters where Tyrion is sitting on his ass in the river, just talking to people. (will I eat crow about this if these pay off in hugely satisfying ways in Winds or Dream? oh, totally. my brothers, i will gorge myself on sweet sweet corvid. i will wear a dunce cap in the square, and gleefully, if these turn out to not have been wastes of time. the fact that i am writing this means i am willing to stake a non-negligible amount of pride on the prediction that that will not happen). I'm talking about scenes where the characters stare at each other and talk idly about things that have already happened while the author describes things we already have seen in excruciating detail. i'm talking about threads that, while forgivable in a different novel, are unforgivable in this one, because you are neglecting your main characters and their story. and don't tell me you think that a day-by-day account tyrion's river cruise is necessary to telling his story, because in the count of monte cristo, the main guy disappears for nine years and comes hurtling back into the story as a vengeful aristocrat! and while time jumps like that don't work for everything, they certainly do work if what you're talking about isn't a major story thread!
now put aside whether or not all these meandering, unconcluded threads are enjoyable to read (as, in fairness, they often are!). think about them as if you're a tv showrunner. these bad boys are your worst nightmare. because while you know the author put them in for a reason, you haven't read the conclusion to the arc, so you don't know what that reason is. and even if the author tells you in broad strokes how things are going to end for any particular character (and this is a big "if," because GRRM's whole style is that he lets plots "develop as he goes," so I'm not actually convinced that he does have endings written out for most major characters), that still doesn't help you get them from point A (meandering storyline) to point B (actual conclusion). oh, and by the way, you have under a year to write this full season of television, while GRRM has been thinking about how to end the books for at least 10. all of this means you have to basically call an audible on whether or not certain arcs are going to pay off, and, if they are, whether they make for good television, and hence are worth writing. and you have to do that for every. single. unfinished. story. in the books.
here's an example: in the books, Quentin Martell goes on a quest to marry Daenerys and gain a dragon. many chapters are spent detailing this quest. spoiler alert: he fails, and he gets charbroiled by dragons. GRRM includes this plot to set up the actions of House Martell in Winds, but the problem is that we don't know what House Martell does in Winds, because (see above) the book DNE. So, although we can reliably bet that the showrunners understand (1) Daenerys is coming to Westeros with her 3 fantasy nukes, and (2) at some point they're gonna have to deal with the invasion of frozombies from Canada, that DOESN'T mean they necessarily know exactly what's going to happen to Dorne, or House Martell. i mean, fuck! we don't even know if Martin knows what's going to happen to Dorne or House Martell, because he's said he's the kind of writer who doesn't set shit out beforehand! so for every "Cersei defaults on millions of dragons in loans from the notorious Bank of Nobody Fucks With Us, assumes this will have no repercussions for her reign or Westerosi politics in general" plotline — which might as well have a big glaring THIS WILL BE IMPORTANT stamp on top of the chapter heading — you have Arianne Martell trying to do a coup/parent trap switcheroo with Myrcella, or Euron the Goffick Antichrist, or Faegon Targaryen and JonCon preparing a Blackfyre restoration, or anything else that might pan out — but might not! And while that uncertainty about what's important to the "overall story" might be a realistic way of depicting human beings in a world ruled by chance and not Destiny, it makes for much better reading than viewing, because Game of Thrones as a fantasy television series was based on the first three books, which are much more traditional "there is a plot and main characters and you can generally tell who they are" kind of book. I see Feast and Dance as a kind of soft reboot for the series in this respect, because they recenter the story around a much larger cast and cast a much broader net in terms of which characters "deserve" narrative attention.
but if you're making a season of television, you can't do that, because you've already set up the basic premise and pacing of your story, and you can't suddenly pivot into a long-form tone poem about the horrors of war. so you have to cut something. but what are you gonna cut? bear in mind that you can't just Forget About Dorne, or the Iron Islands, or the Vale, or the North, or pretty much any region of the story, because it's all interconnected, but to fit in everything from the books would require pacing of the sort that no reasonable audience would ever tolerate. and bear in mind that the later books sprout a lot more of these baby-plots that could go somewhere, but also might end up being secondary or tertiary to the "main story," which, at the end of the day, is about dragons and ice zombies and the rot at the heart of the feudal power system glorified in classical fantasy. that's the story that you as the showrunner absolutely must give them an end to, and that's the story that should be your priority 1.
so you do a hack and slash job, and you mortar over whatever you cut out with storylines that you cook up yourself, but you can't go too far afield, because you still need all the characters more or less in place for the final showdown. so you pinch here and push credulity there, and you do your best to put the characters in more or less the same place they would have been if you kept the original, but on a shorter timeframe. and is it as good as the first seasons? of course not! because the material that you have is not suited to TV like the first seasons are. and not only that, but you are now working with source material that is actively fighting your attempt to constrain a linear and well-paced narrative on it. the text that you're working with changed structure when you weren't looking, and now you have to find some way to shanghai this new sprawling behemoth of a Thing into a television show. oh, and by the way, don't think that the (living) author of the source material will be any help with this, because even though he's got years of experience working in television writing, he doesn't actually know how all of these threads will tie together, which is possibly the reason that the next book has taken over 8 years (now 13 and counting) to write. oh and also, your showrunners are sick of this (in fairness, very difficult) job and they want to go write for star wars instead, so they've refused the extra time the studio offered them for pre-production and pushed through a bunch of first-draft scripts, creating a crunch culture of the type that spawns entirely avoidable mistakes, like, say, some poor set designer leaving a starbucks cup in frame.
anyway, that's what I think went wrong with game of thrones.
#using the tags as a footnote system here but in order:#1. quentin MAY not be dead according to some theories but in the text he is a charred corpse#2. arianne is great and i love her but to be honest. my girl is kinda dumb. just 2 b real.#3. faegon is totally a blackfyre i think it's so obvious it may well be text at this point#it's almost r+l = j level man like it's kind of just reading comprehension at this point#4. relatedly there are some characters i think GRRM has endings picked out for and some i think he specifically does NOT#i think stannis melisandre jon and daenerys all will end up the same. jon and dany war crimes => murder/banishment arc is just classic GRRM#but i think jon's reasoning will be different and it'll be better-written.#im sorry but babygirl shireen IS getting flambeed. in response stannis will commit epic battle suicide killing all boltons i hope#brienne will live but in some tragic 'stay awhile horatio' capacity. likely she will try to die defending her liege and fail#faegon will die there's zero chance blackfyres win ever#now jaime/cersei I do NOT think he knows. my brothers in christ i don't think this motherfucker knows who the valonqar is!!#same with tyrion i think that the author in GRRM wants to do a nasty corruption arc + kill him off but the person in him loves him too much#sansa i have no goddamn idea what's going to happen. we just don't know enough about the northern conspiracy to tell#w/ arya i think he has... ideas. i don't think she's going to sail off to Explore i am almost certain that the show doing that was a cover#because the actual idea he gave them was unsavory or nonviable for some reason. bc like.#why would arya leave bran and jon and sansa? the family she's just spent her whole life fighting to come back to and avenge?#this is suspicious this does not feel like arya this does not feel right#bran will not be king or if he is it'll be in a VERY different way not the dumbfuck 'let's vote' bullshit#i personally think bran is going to go full corruption arc and become possessed by the 3 eyed raven. but that could be a pipe dream#the thing is he's way too OP in the show so the books have to nerf him and i think GRRM is still trying to work out#a way to actually do that.#i don't think he told them what happened with littlefinger or sansa. i think sansa's story is vaguely similar#(stark restoration through the female line etc)#but the queen in the north shit is way too contrived frankly. and selfishly i hope she gets something different#being a monarch in ASOIAF is not a happy ending. we know this from the moment we meet robert baratheon in AGOT#and we learn exactly what GRRM thinks of the people who 'win' these endless wars of succession#and they are not heroes#they are not celebrated#and they are neither safe nor happy
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"All hail His Grace, Joffrey of Houses Baratheon and Lannister, First of His Name, King of the Andals and the First Men, Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, and Protector of the Realm."
Most Hated Character of all Time -> Joffrey Baratheon played by Jack Gleeson
#jack gleeson 100% understood the assignment#joffrey's death aired 10 years ago and he is still at the first place in lists of the most hated characters of all time#for real gleeson deserved 324874358934 emmys for this#joffrey baratheon#joffrey lannister#house lannister#jaime lannister#tyrion lannister#sansa stark#game of thrones#got
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another anti-dany post from someone with a sansa pfp, another blocked user 💃💅
#why are they Like That?#i say this as someone who really loves sansa#yes dany is my fav asoiaf female character but i LOVE THEM ALL#arya brienne asha arianne hell even cersei!#~i'm gonna be so pissed if the prophecy is real and confirm the targs are Special and the show is pro dany uwu~#sweetie your precious jon snow is half targ too lmao. daenerys literally woke dragons from stone#they're the prince who was promised/azor ahai/whatever we want to call it. targs are only human and as any feudal family in asoiaf#*extremely* flawed to say the least... but. these are fantasy books. the special bloodline™ deconstruction is not#'the heir to the dragon kings will go InSaNe in an astoundingly misogynistic and ableist plot twist' but#the people who will save the world - the chosen ones - are a girl in a horribly patriarchal world#and a bastard in a society that demonize them#(and obviously bran - a 'cripple' - and arya - a gnc girl - and tyrion - a dwarf - etc. too)#THAT'S the deconstruction. this is a '90 fantasy series for god's sake#val speaks#txt
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you know for as narratively bad as the last 2 (maybe 3) seasons of GOT were I got to hand it to em they did sprinkle some damned entertaining moments in there
#like. it's still not game of thrones. but some of it was still fun to watch#specifically petyr balish getting fucked up by the wolf pack#and arya at the battle of winterfell sneaking through the library. and then also her 'winter came for house frey' like like damn girl#stone COLD#also sansa and tyrion in the crypt which is what made me ship them for real and I still do to this day#it really do be having moments. most of the rest of it is dogshit from here but like at least we had fun you know.#I'm still entertained even though it's just not the story I wanted you know?
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#started reading game of thrones because i was like#the problem i had with the show was that though it was interesting I found it a bit hard to get super attached to any of the characters#so i bet reading it will make that easier because it will be more in depth with them all#but TO MY SURPRISE it feels almost exactly the same as watching the show to me??#like i have almost the exact same level of feeling and familiarity toward everybody so far and insight into them as characters etc#and maybe that is somewhat because grr martin was a tv writer because dang if he doesnt write a novel exactly like a tv drama#but im feeling a bit disappointed maybe because i really did want it to feel deeper to me instead of basically the same#idk why but the ones i like best so far still are a bit hard for me to love you know#its more like i mildly enjoy a few of the characters and then tolerate or dislike the rest#i kinda like tyrion and littlefinger and jon and sam and arya#oh weirdly i also kinda like king Robert too idk he just feels more like a real person to me than some of the other guys#if anything i think i actually like some of the main characters less in the books than the show like#catelyn and sansa get on my nerves more in the novel than i remember them doing in the show#so far the character that seems the best cast to me is lord varys lol its like he stepped straight off the page onto the screen#all sickly sweet and sneaky and bald and perfumed#p
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tyrion today tyrion tomorrow tyrion forever. 4realsies
#the only PERSON in this FUCKASS KINGDOM with any FUCKASS SENSE. just watched his trial..my blood boiled...#what is new umm red wedding happened obvs. barely remembered robb was in it so idc about that. joffrey died and we#all cheered but now things are hairy for tyrion (we stopped cheering). jon did idk what daenerys did the same thing shes been doing for#three series. bran umm idk hes really into this three eyed raven dont ask me idc. theons having a rough time but again idc sawry.#the tyrells are slaying kings landing left right and centre theyre KILLING it often literally. sansa doing WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE!!#arya ill be real i dont remember where arya is going. brienne is going to look for sansa i think? idk but shes killing it..think thats#everyone think thats the round up...anyway tyrion is worth a thousand of each of the rest of them for realsies..#got
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watch mojo top ten Lannister v children beef
10. Loras v Jaime: about as lighthearted as any of this gets
9. Tyrion v Robert Arryn: sometimes the kids do have bad vibes
8. Tywin v Robb: he got so mad he threw a tantrum and demolished Robb’s whole family (almost)
7. Jaime v Robb: he did try to kill him but also he respects him
6. Jaime & Cersei v Arya: oft forgotten latecomer. Arya doesn’t even know
5. Tyrion v Joffrey: sometimes the kids really, really do have bad vibes
4. Cersei v Sansa: a sure classic
3. Cersei v Margaery: like half the driving force of AFFC, some real beefing w a teenager going on here
2. Jaime v Bran: the original Lannister beef with a child, nobody doing it like them, etc
1. Jaime v Hermione Granger: need I say more
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One thing I find funny from Show Dany haters is how much they call her an egomaniac tyrant who just wanted to control everything and everyone to obey her, that she only cared about the throne and power. How much they laugh at the idea of her trying to help common people, break the system and in general, give power to powerless people, etc. That she would only want power for herself and would loathe democracy more than any other character.
These people are also the ones who laughed along Season 8 Sansa, Tyrion, Arya and others when Sam proposed democracy as a system for Westeros at the end of the show.
To all that people, I'd like to kindly remind that before leaving for Westeros, Daenerys established democracy in Meereen (and the rest of the Bay of Dragons, I suppose). She and Tyrion spent some undetermined time to plan it and then left Daario and the Second Sons to keep the peace while people chose their rulers and a new government was appointed.
Now, while I'm sure we all would have liked to know the aftermatch of that, how things worked there after her leaving and especially after her death, we won't ever know thanks to certain writers who kinda forgot about it after S6, only remembering the Bay when deciding that slaying slavers was apparently a sign of madness and evilness ?¿
If you ask me, with Dany dead, most of her army destroyed as well, and no one else strong enough to protect the Bay, slavery will return and way worse. But that wasn't something D&D wanted people to think about because that would add some grey to the situation and they wanted Dany to be irremediably unjustifiable in her acts and her death the only option with only good consequences. Just to be clear, I think S8 Dany, a total different character from previous seasons, deserved to die after what she did. But go and visit the Bay in ten years, Jon and Tyrion, and ask them if what you two did was good. Surely and certaintly there were consequences.
In any case, since we'll never know what would happen, the series ends with Daenerys being the only ruler who actually cared for her people enough that she actually gave them total power to choose who should rule them... just 12 episodes before the writers decided she should mass murder innocents for literally no reason at all
She remains the only one who established real democracy that considered people no matter their origins or status (and not merely in a organization like the Night Watch) while the high nobles of Westeros laughed and considered the idea ridiculous. What a tyrant, right?
I'd have liked Sam to know the one who actually established his idea in a different place was the queen he hated so much, while all the others laughed. I'd have also liked if he was told what his family did and how many people died because of their betrayal, how many chances were even then offered to them, rather than just "they didn't bend the knee so i killed them lol". But the goal in Season 8 was always to paint Dany as a villain with no gray in the middle, just like they made Jon lie to his family and the lords and say Dany forced him to bend the knee in order to help the North when she actually swore to defend it without any commitment to her cause the moment she realized the threat was real and no fantasy. Yet no one, not even Dany, ever blinked an eye about this. Like it was retconned to frame her as evil.
#daenerys#daenerys targaryen#daenerys stormborn#queen daenerys#mother of dragons#breaker of chains#pro daenerys#pro daenerys targaryen#team daenerys#got#game of thrones#anti d&d#hotd#house of the dragon#asoiaf#team black
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-Something in Robb’s tone troubled her. She smoothed out the paper and read. Concern gave way to disbelief, then to anger, and lastly to fear.
“This is Cersei’s letter, not your sister’s,” she said when she was done. “The real message is in what Sansa does not say. All this about how kindly and gently the Lannisters are treating her… I know the sound of a threat, even whispered.
They have Sansa hostage, and they mean to keep her.”
-Lady Mormont took her hand and said, “My lady, if Cersei Lannister held two of my daughters, I would have done the same.” The Greatjon, no respecter of proprieties, lifted her off her feet and squeezed her arms with his huge hairy hands. “Your wolf pup mauled the Kingslayer once, he’ll do it again if need be.”
-Robb's fingers brushed the pommel of his sword. "If I could I'd take his ugly head off. Sansa would be a widow then, and free. There's no other way that I can see. They made her speak the vows before a septon and don a crimson cloak."
Catelyn remembered the twisted little man she had seized at the crossroads inn and carried all the way to the Eyrie. "I should have let Lysa push him out her Moon Door."
Like what the hell are they even talking about anymore. Hopefully Sansa antis wake up one day and realise that nobody but them, will think that a 13 year old willingly married into the family that killed hers. If northern lords believed that women should totally attach themselves to their captors they wouldn't be marching against the Bolton's and trying to save "Arya". None of them are talking how "Arya" probably willingly married Ramsey. They wouldn't hold any judgment for Ramsey forcefully marrying lady Hornwood.
-And do you imagine the Hornwood men have forgotten the Bastard's last marriage, and how his lady wife was left to starve, chewing her own fingers? What do you think passes through their heads when they hear the new bride weeping?
Remember how they think that 15 year old Lyanna willingly ran away with 23 year old Rhegar. Oh wait they don't. But no they definitely will think that 13 year old Sansa willingly married to 26 year old Tyrion+ all the bad things they believe about him.
#sansa stark#anti sansa antis#asoiaf#and I love how they tagged the post anti Sansa like that's supposed to be her fault
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not to discourse (i say as i discourse every day) but one thing i find frustrating in the conversation about young griff is that people tend to paint him as some out of control angry spoiled little lordling who hasn't experienced the ~real hardships~ of others. and that's frustrating just because it's like a) what the fuck does real hardship even mean get the fuck out of my face with that shit but b) oh he's a 16/17 year old with a slight temper? are we pretending like jon, dany, sansa, and arya all haven't lost their tempers and fucked some shit up due to that at some point? bran is out here mindraping hodor and we're pretending like yg getting pissy over a game of cyvase is somehow a sign he will never be a good king??
MEANWHILE half the crew of the shy maid is like "tyrion is fucked he swallowed like a gallon of poisoned water we gotta throw him overboard" and don't throw him overboard very specifically because young griff tells them not too. and then spends the entire next chapter in a bad mood not because he's throwing a tantrum but because he's annoyed he's not allowed to go out and do shit while everyone else risks their lives. that feels like a very rational reason to be a brat idk!!!
#what teenager wants to hang out with their babysitter playing chess all day be for real!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#people are so mean about aegon bc they feel he's doomed but being doomed to get murdered by one of the mains doesn't make him evil#just makes him deeply unlucky!!!#rani liveblogs asoiaf#i should have a tag for when i know i'm being wanky lol
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asoiaf modern au where agot takes place in the most dysfunctional secondary school ever. arya has an accommodation plan for her adhd that gives her permission to draw in class but cersei (who is the kind of teacher that hates having to follow inclusion policies) gets mad and throws away one of arya's wolf oc drawings except that particular drawing was actually sansa's and when sansa finds out she gets so pissed off that she dumps joffrey over it. joffrey gets cersei to try and get ned removed from his position of assistant principal even though he's basically running the school at that point because robert baratheon (the real principal) keeps getting drunk when he's supposed to be working.
jon joins an after-school self-defense/outdoor survival skills club and somehow ends up in a weird leadership role because he's one of the only ones who knows what he's doing. tyrion shows up sometimes to try and sell him shitty weed. arya is always begging him to let her come even though she's still under the age limit. daenerys is a transfer student who spends every single one of her classes doing wings of fire rp on scratch.mit.edu but still manages to get good grades so a bunch of the teachers hate her because they're convinced she's cheating.
robert baratheon gets fired after the school board gets an anonymous tip about his drinking on the clock. the anonymous tipper is actually cersei because she's mad that he won't let joffrey run for student council because he's gotten in trouble for bullying too much. when ned finds out about this cersei gets him fired too which makes arya mad so she makes jon teach her mma so she can beat up joffrey. catelyn gets so upset about ned getting fired that she convinces herself that tyrion was in on it bc he's cersei's sister despite the fact that cersei fully and actually hates his guts and tyrion wasn't even remotely involved because he was too busy trying to hide from jon's uncle benjen after he caught him trying to sell jon weed.
robb stark (low level admin position but everyone thinks he's just there bc nepotism which is actually sorta true) tries to get the rest of admin to band together to expose cersei but most of them don't give a fuck so he has to try and network with their longtime rival school to try and find allies. he also may or may not have introduced bran to the online furry community and he really really doesn't want ned or catelyn to find out. daenerys somehow manages to get a whole squad of jocks to basically be her personal bodyguards after she introduces them to wings of fire and they get hooked.
catelyn almost kicks jon out because she thinks he taught rickon to curse when actually rickon overheard sansa ranting about joffrey while on the phone with jeyne poole.
#asoiaf#got#a song of ice and fire#asoiaf modern au#shitpost#a game of thrones#this is so fucking stupid#you think it's funny. reblog.#pigeon.txt#love putting high stakes fantasy characters into the most mundane environments#it's like enrichment for them
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God I hope I can remember how to annoy everyone after the last week spent in my mozart lacrimosa hole being sick with covid and being forced to write this final paper… anyways edmure tully red wedding fancam when?
#the only man who had an allegedly good time for a little bit at the red wedding was him and it was nice to see#can y’all believe that this show was my first encounter with him and ciaran like for real??? jesus#also JUST REALIZING THAT SIR JOHN ROSS IS THE BLACK FISH!!!! OH WOW#oh I’m going to be winking at him a lot more whenever I re watch the terror now#god but this show was so good when it was good it has to be said#AND AGAIN. AFTER ALL THIS TIME. WE REALLY COULD HAVE HAD IT ALL WITH SANSA AND TYRION I AM SO SERIOUS#and no I’m not talking about the time of their canon wedding no. no its good nothing happened then. but my god they were real cute when#they were sitting around talking shit
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Here, approximately, is what happens in Gothic Romance […] A young female is stripped of her human support, her mother usually dead before the novel begins, her father or other guardian dying in the early chapters. The lover (if any) who might protect her is sent away or prevented from seeing her. Depending upon the period of the novel, she may be kidnapped, or fall into the hands of an unscrupulous guardian, or go out as a governess, or marry hastily. Out in the world her troubles multiply. People want to kill her, rape her, lock her up in a convent for life, and make off with her small fortune. Her task is to defend her virtue and liberty, to resist evil, and especially to penetrate disguises - spot the plausible seeming villains, trust the suspicious looking heroes - and thereby rebuild a support system that will restore her to a quiet life. With pluck and luck she manages these near impossibilities and is rewarded with the discovery of lost relatives and/or the promise of reliable domestic love in a household of her own. (-Ann B. Tracy, "Gothic Romance" in: The Handbook to Gothic Literature)
there it is. the description of the gothic heroine is also a perfect description of sansa stark's character journey. the isolation in king's landing after she's made hostage, guardians that seek to steal her birthright (the lannisters and petyr), the struggle to see through disguises and learning that not all that glitters is gold (cersei and joffrey) and learning to sympathize with scary-looking people (sandor, tyrion, possibly brienne in the future) plus the way that the thing she wants most right now is to go home. even the lack of supernatural elements in her story can still be somewhat on point considering that in a lot of the 'female gothic' the supernatural was often explained away with reason, because at the end of the day the real danger to these heroines was the ownership of women's bodies, the stifling of them usually symbolized by an eerie castle or mansion that enclosed them. sansa's plight in life is that she seems unable to get out of the castle. she's a caged bird trying to be free, to live in peace with her loved ones in a place where she can call home.
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The writers are trying real hard to push the “modern feminism” narrative in a fantasy universe that revolves around a medieval setting. I hate that Alicent and Rhaenyra are in a middle of a civil war and they ’re all acting like no bad blood happened. They both lost loved ones but be like let me reconnect with my former bestie first. They both should feel rage and annihilate everyone who stands on their way. Alicent selling Aegon out is a fine example of character assassination. A Hightower noblewoman whose world revolves around family, power, and prestige then risking it all to rekindle some sort of bond for her petty childhood friend.
The series is so completely divorced from its setting. There is no pacifism or feminism in this world, unfortunately. War is glorified and a means to safeguard family honor. Comparing this so-called war to the ones in Game of Thrones only highlights this fact. Tyrion Lannister is taken captive, so the Lannisters declare war to get him back. Ned Stark is beheaded and Sansa held hostage, so the Starks declare war to get justice. Stannis and Renly separately want to press their claims despite a king already being crowned and sitting the throne, so they have to declare war to take it from him. There's no hesitation about using their hosts in battle and defeating the enemy armies. There's no hesitation in sacking towns. This is how medieval warfare works and its accepted that this is how problems are solved.
Instead HOTD has Alicent's second son permanently disfigured and disabled by the enemy, her honor insulted by her husband the king, her young grandson beheaded in his bed and his mother psychologically tormented. Alicent would want war and the annihilation of her enemy. HOTD has Rhaenyra lose two children, a father, and a throne to the Greens. She should also want war and the death of those who wronged her. Instead we have "sisterhood transcends houses and medieval sensibilities" and "good people are pacifists."
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I just finsihed None But the Lonely Heart by OccasionalAvenger after seeing your fic rec and loved it even though i dont read much jamie x brienne centric stories.
Do you have any other fic recs from asoiaf/got?
Omg yay I’m so glad you liked it!
If you enjoyed None But the Lonely Heart in terms of setting, here are a few more in-universe fics you might enjoy:
I'm dying to be born again by angel_deux
After the wars are done, Daenerys is queen of the six kingdoms. Jon and Sansa Stark rule the north. And Jaime serves as a hostage in Kings Landing to ensure his brother's good behavior. When Tyrion schemes to see Jaime married off and removed from the city, Jaime is allowed to choose his wife.
He should be happier that the woman he loves is quick to accept his proposal. Except maybe it's too quick. And she just says, "all right". And she calls it sensible.
Bound by the Things We Choose by winterkill
Jaime's pretty certain he would remember standing across from the dour, hulking Maid of Tarth and swearing to be with her until the end of his days.
Personally, I love an AU. These are the ones I always return to:
Light a fire, burn up all you know by brynnmck
When rich, arrogant Jaime Lannister swans into Brienne's dad's diner and spends the whole time making out with his rude stepsister, Brienne couldn't be more relieved that she'll probably never have to see either one of them again. The only problem is, over the next 15 years, Jaime keeps coming back.
Or: five letters that Brienne burned, and one she didn't.
Same Time, Next Year by angelowl
“I’m Jaime,” he says, his eyes gleaming with laughter.
There’s a wicked edge to his mirth that makes Brienne wonder if it’s her freakishness that’s the butt of his joke so she spins on her heel and stiffly marches away.
After that, Jaime inexplicably keeps seeking her out.
The Dark, Dread Toyshop by Miss_M
The summer she turns sixteen, Brienne suffers a grave loss. She and her siblings are forced to move in with their Uncle Tywin and his sons, who own a fabulous and eerie toyshop. Sexual awakenings occur, dark family secrets are revealed, and puppet theatre echoes real life.
Baby I Will by sdwolfpup
When a country singer with a stripper's name and a model's looks strolls into Selwyn's bar to perform one Tuesday night, bartender Brienne isn't sure what to expect. What they both end up with is so much more than they bargained for.
Brienne, Plain and Tall by greenmtwoman
Farmer with two children and substantial property in the West seeks a wife. Requirements are honesty, sobriety, a strong back and a thick skin. A practical arrangement will be made. Beauty is unnecessary and intimacy not expected. Interested parties should contact Mr. Jaime Lannister, Casterly Farm.
Did this Mr. Lannister want a wife or a hired hand? But in either case what did she have to lose?
Or if you’re in the mood for some longer-form reading, these are amazing:
The Lion, The Wench, and the Wardrobe Trailer by GilShalos1
Jaime Lannister’s entire acting career has been built on playing reckless cads and heartless villains – ever since a scandalous death on his first film, Kingslayer, was quickly hushed up at his father’s behest. Nearly fifteen years later, acclaimed director Olenna Tyrell has announced her retirement: after one last film, Oathkeeper, inspired by the mythic story of the Long Night. She wants Jaime to do what he does so well, play into his on-screen persona and off-screen reputation, and be a villain for the ages in her final film. But to make sure his infamous ways don’t interfere with production, she requires his personal assistant to keep him on the straight, narrow and sober. Brienne Tarth, in her first job on a film set, finds herself tasked with keeping the impossible Jaime Lannister under control …
Heart Full of Gasoline by sdwolfpup
Jaime Lannister is a Formula 1 driver with a sordid past, dubious future, and nothing left to lose as he hits the far edge of his career. He thinks all he wants is the world championship title he’s never quite been able to reach and to finally give up smoking. What he finds to his great surprise is what he really wants might be Brienne Tarth.
Brienne Tarth is an unknown mechanic eager to make the jump to the big time of Formula 1. When Jaime hires her as Chief Mechanic for his team of misfits, she discovers she’s ready for the work, but is she ready for Jaime?
#sorry this is so long but please enjoy!#this is literally just grazing the surface of all the amazing fics out there#but if I were starting from the beginning these are the ones I would love to read with fresh eyes#Jaime Lannister#brienne of tarth#jaime x brienne#sissy blogs ASOIAF
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