#the quality of these games do not come from the potential of a sequel

[salbertwolf]

The earth shattering realization the game you have played is the only one like it, there is no other game, there isn't a world like it and you are cursed with that knowledge and abandonment for it, you are happier to have known and experienced the joys of playing, have come out wiser for it, but you'll never get anything like it again.

[miiilowo]

Highlights / Notable info from the second Scott Cawthon Dawko interview for people who don't want to watch it

MISC/START OF INTERVIEW

- scott says the 1 thing he'd wanna go back and change/fix the past 10 years is FNAF world; said a lot of weird/bad decisions were made going into it, that he didn't like the graphics and it Could Have been a good game but he doesn't like it overall & he may consider making an improved sequel

- he was scared to hand FNAF over to steel wool but he thinks he got lucky w/ them

- refuses to play both FNAF VR games because they genuinely scare him too much; didn't want to beta test them (funny)

- he very much knows the fandom prefers pure horror and the supernatural but cant resist leaning into scifi stuff

- doesn't like the names burntrap and glitchtrap and they were supposed to be temporary

SECURITY BREACH

- half blames covid splitting up steel wools workforce for the games lack of quality and delays

- says his "vision of the game" was misaligned with steel wool, that he had a "very specific story in mind" for security breach and it didnt pan out like he wanted

- he takes fault for it, saying he conveyed it in a bad way; "I was trying to tell steel wool to do specific things throughout the game, put specific items in specific places, have specific characters do certain things, meanwhile not TELLING them what the story plot was. Because in my head, I was thinking 'Okay, when people find this, they'll connect this to this to this & it will all be revealed, and I thought I could do that without telling steel wool the story plot. That didn't work out very well because they got all of these pieces, and they thought it was their job to connect them in a way that made sense. And so really what you ended up having were the same pieces telling completely different stories...I don't blame them for that, I blame myself for that, because what I should have done was gone 'hey, heres the story, the pieces are here, here's how theyre supposed to connect'."

- burntrap originally even supposed to move; just supposed to see something you saw in between machinery or in corners, that you werent supposed to know his purpose even though he used to have a very specific one (that the fandom doesnt know)

- he knows it didnt turn out like anyone wanted & thats why they made the RUIN dlc, he hopes it redeemed security breach

- he said hes learned from that mistake with security breach and things should be better in the future

- he cannot share any thoughts on the mimic

- he likes vanny a lot, shes one of his favorites and he thinks that shes underutilized and should get more spotlight in the future

THE BOOKS

- process is 'he has an idea, he proposes it to the writers, they flesh it out'

- he likes bunny call the most, and that it's not entirely made up; he took his family to a summer camp. 2 older kids 2 babies. one of the things you could sign up for was a 'panda call' . a very 'deceiving title', he says. early in the morning, a bunch of the camp counselors dressed as killer clowns would come into your cabin and scare the kids to wake them up early and drag them off to do their daily activities (?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????) and he knew this was the case, & before it happened he started to sort of feel bad that he signed up his two youngest kids for it so he crept outside in the dark and 'started listening for screams' early in the morning. 'somewhere in the dark in these trees theres clowns and theyre coming for my cabin'

- acknowledges the fazgoo is weird and bad.

- the 'creature on the cover of blackbird is my sleep paralysis demon' (quite literally)

- says his least favorite story is the guy getting pregnant with springtrap's baby and that he Doesnt Know What He Was Thinking, that he swears he 'wasnt trying to pick on matpat'

- he says theres potential for the books to be adapted into shorts goosebumps style, but hes afraid it might be 'too much' and oversaturate the franchise

THE MOVIE

- he says a big issue was that there was material thats difficult to translate to the big screen; the nuance of the antagonists being that the animatronics are possessed by the spirits of innocent children, and he wanted to preserve the innocence of the victims while also having the horror and the kills, and thats a big part of why several screenplays got scrapped; he was more picky/cautious about that than anything else

- says the victims are sort of like 'confused, scared animals backed into a corner, who believe that adults are out to get them' & thats part of why they kill people + the manipulation from william afton

- he likes the movie overall but thinks specific things could be improved and they aim to do that with the second movie, but doesn't want to dwell on those shortcomings too much

- hes perfectly happy with critics hating it but the fanbase loving it & that was his goal for it

- when the movie began showing in theatres he said: 'i told myself i wasnt gonna go online i wasnt gonna read any reviews i had already told everybody at blumhouse and i told my legal team DONT talk to me DONT call me DONT email me DONT send me charts DONT send me facts or figures i dont want hear ANYTHING', saw 1 negative review on accident then started reading all of them immediately before the 2nd showing even happened

- 'for a couple of hours there i was distraught, i thought it was a complete disaster' (based off the initial negative critic reviews, before learning how much the fans loved it)

SECOND MOVIE

- Not giving away many details, but following the same formula; 1st movie based on 1st game, 2nd movie based on 2nd game, etc

- Thinks people will like it, that the setup for the 1st movie was the hardest part but now that they have that launch pad to go off of and hes really fond of what they have planned

- Emma Tammi is also directing the second one

INTO THE PIT GAME

- was originally just supposed to be a short novelty game, but they made something really good and he encouraged them to keep going & its turned into a full-fledged game

- he says its going to be a very 'unique experience' and that everyone will like it a lot

- says working with megacat (studio for the game) has been 'weird but good', that theyll vanish for several months and return with a bunch of info

SPINOFFS, GENERAL FRANCHISE STUFF, FUTURE PLANS

- Would want to work on a game based off of Fetch and that he thinks it'd be really cool

- Says he feels like he's sort of lost touch with the fanbase as things have gotten bigger

- Wants to have a better structure for managing a twitter page, official news feed, etc., wants more management than just Himself because it'd better service the fanbase

- He says theres another game planned with steel wool (not the mimic game) way down the line that hasnt been announced yet

- Making more choose-your-adventure fnaf book stuff

- He's 'very careful' with collaborations because he wants to preserve the fact its fnaf and he doesnt want it to be distorted or tainted, & even if he really really likes a game he won't do a collab if the vibes are mismatched, but he's a little more open to things like that now (but we have FNAF X DBD now! yay)

THE BOX.

- (paraphrased) His process for a lot of the lore in games is that he'll come up with half of a mystery and then come up with an answer as things progress, that he feels something is there and he makes the path for that thing to be revealed

- 'but sometimes when things progress the roads that have been put in place arent the same roads that were there before'

- he had something planned for the box. the progression of the story did not allow for the reveal of whats in the box

- he never pursued whats in the box. and he will never know whats in the box.

[felkithecreator]

Do you have revalink fic recs?

Oh do I ever. (Please don't take the numbers that I use too seriously, they're not to really judge the quality of work or anything it's just level of enjoyment for me and my particular tastes)

My favorite Revalink fic of all time is Pinesong by aperplexingpuzzle!! Honestly it's just an absolutely amazing work, and personally I think it's one of the greatest post-calamity Revalink stories written. Link and Revali bond on Vah Medoh after Revali's been freed and exists as a spirit, and while Link struggles through the rest of his adventure. Absolutely recommend, 10/10.

Finding Link by Umbreonix is another one I'd absolutely recommend. It's so silly and just - the characterization of Link and Revali is so fun. Link goes missing after the defeat of Calamity Ganon, and it's up to Revali to find him and potentially bring him back. Honestly Umbreonix's other Revalink work Beating about the bush is also phenomenal - that one's unfinished, but it's also great if you want to read something silly. It's a modernized/human version of Hyrule, which is super interesting as well. All That Glitters is hilarious as well. Recommend them all around 8.5/10.

Linger On by ICanFlyHigher is one I genuinely loved as well. It's been a while since I've read it, but I do know that the vivid descriptions of combat and fighting, and just - the immersion of it is so impressive. So I'd really really recommend this one. It's basically just Botw, but you're really put in Link shoes + that extra touch of Revalink. Again, haven't read it in a while, but 9/10 recommendation from what I remember.

I Lost Myself by self_indulgent_authorship is amazing as well. I love reading from Revali's perspective, and just - the take on Link and Revali getting to know each other after Link's lost his memory is so interesting and refreshing. I wouldn't recommend it if you don't like a bit of Zelda-bashing, but I think this fic handles it well and it didn't feel as if it were over the top or anything. 9/10 recommendation.

Snow filled days by SharkPinata is a great one if you're just down for a fun time!! The author kind of took a concept/idea and ran with it, and the plot grew later - and it shows, a bit, but honestly that's part of the fun with this fic. A great thing about it is you can also see the author's writing style improve over time as they write (I desperately hope that the same can be said about my fics too), so it's fun in that aspect of well. The concept is that Link isn't a knight, and just lives in Selkie's Spot in Hebra - where Revali regularly comes to visit him because they're each other's only friends. 7.5/10 recommendation.

Shades of Blue also by self_indulgent_authorship is just fucking amazing. It's the normal botw journey, but you get so much more intricate lore and flashbacks than the OG game - one where Link and Revali knew each other before they became champions - and it's so so so so good. I genuinely think it's one of the greatest Breath of the Wild fics out there, regardless of Revalink. 10/10 recommendation.

Come Morning Light by misscoconi is great as well!! I haven't read it in a long while but I do know it's one of my favorites. It's very sweet - and it's where Link and Revali begin a shared sleeping arrangement. (Meet Me Halfway is the sequel, also very good.) 10/10 recommendation.

The Longest Night by tirsynni is amazing. It's a relatively short fic, and it's unfinished, but it's still just - great. Trigger warning for some things, I'd definitely recommend reading the tags first, but like, I love. It's an interesting exploration of Link's psyche, and Revali's response to it. Honestly, anything by tirsynni tends to be amazing. 8/10 recommendation.

The Effect of the Illusion of Truth by GeryutheTzakandi!!! This is genuinely one of my favorite fics ever - it's so silly and funny and just an all-around good time. Small warning in that it's unfinished and hasn't updated since 2022, but like - I'd still give it a read because what is there is a fun time. It's a fic where Revali and Link decided to get married so that Link and Zelda don't have to. (And no, the two of them were not previously dating.) 10/10 recommendation.

(Another good one by GeryutheTzakandi is Deftly avoiding saying exactly what you mean - this one's hilarious, and Revali is surprisingly self-aware.)

Inertia by sincosma is a great exploration of how Link's amnesia affects the relationship between him and Revali - and what promises they made pre-Calamity. The memories are so interesting yet heart-breaking to read - but the happy ending makes it very much worth it. 9/10 recommendation.

A Seed of Song by Ginneke is adorable. I'm always a sucker for child fics/baby acquisition fics, especially if they're done well, and, well - this one is definitely done well. It's very cute - it's unfinished, but I still think it's worthwhile to read what's been written so far. The drama of Link not wanting to marry Princess Zelda is also very interesting. 7.5/10 recommendation.

Under the Stars by peterpiez is one of my favorites!! Honestly because it's one of the very few Revalink Linked Universe fics to exist. There's very little active Revalink, given most of it is just Link mourning and being retrospective in response to the lives and loves of the other Links, but I still really enjoyed. This is also unfinished, and I don't see the author ever updating it, but I still would recommend giving it a go.

The Last Song on the Wind by Inked_Jael is another incredible fic. There's so much worldbuilding, and insight to Link's thoughts, I just love this one so much. It's super interesting because it explores the politics and the different cultures of Hyrule. I know second-person style can sometimes throw people off, but I think it works really really well given the story - and also if you keep in mind that it's about Link, just... please read this. Their work needs more love. 10/10 recommendation.

a moment's respite by cottonmouthcandy is another one of my favorites. It's a bit of a sad read, because it's pre-calamity and you know what's coming for the champions in the future, but it's a story where you get to just enjoy with them their little vacation at the beach. It's just sweet, and nice. It's been a while since I've read it, though, so those are more just the vibes that I remember rather than the content of the story itself. 9/10 recommendation.

the wind through the flowers by HopeStoryteller is also just a silly, fun time. The boys go Modulga hunting. 7.5/10 recommendation.

I have more, and I would continue, but I kind of have a class in six hours and I need to sleep before then, so uh... yeah. I hope this satisfies you question!! But honestly please spread the love to these authors their works are just absolutely amazing.

[its-dean]

I’ve been posting on other online platforms about Fossil Fighters for a long time now, and most who are familiar with what I share know that a lot of my content has a heavy focus on original vivosaur ideas. With these vivosaurs I come up with, as well as the stats I create to go with them, I notice that there are often people questioning whether what I come up with would be balanced or not from a gameplay standpoint.

As I’ve gone on with developing this unique vision for my vivosaurs, I’ve also slowly refined my idea of Fossil Battles entirely. All of us are aware that both the original Fossil Fighters and Fossil Fighters Champions don’t have the best balancing in the world. There are certain cast members and even a few core game mechanics that allow so many otherwise memorable characters to fall to the wayside, and with the stats I was coming up with I was only further encouraging that type of hostile environment. The more I worried about whether something I was coming up with would feel realistic or balanced the more I considered the fact that the formula itself may have been broken in the first place.

There have been others in the community that have projected their own ideas of how to change things up regarding gameplay, things like adding new elements or even having customizable skills. Because the series felt like it had ended so suddenly there's become so much to dream for in a potential sequel. These are the people that inspired me to attempt something similar myself back when I was making my vivosaur last year. It inspired me to take a step back with my thinking and ultimately led to me creating a total re-imagining of the classic battle system we all know and love. 

That's the thing, the games may not be perfectly balanced, but I always find how these games work to be something that's just inherently fun in a very unique way. Above everything else, with this project I wanted the new system I was creating to still have the "feel" of having a good old-fashioned Fossil Battle. These games have incredible potential for an interesting competitive landscape, just if only some of those unbalanced mechanics were to be adjusted. This is what I strive to achieve the most with my ideas: an environment where every vivosaur has something practical to them, a format where you CAN win using your favorite vivosaurs. The only thing that should stop you is how well thought-out and unique of a strategy you can come up with.

Fossil Fighters Odyssey is a personal project of mine that I've technically been working on for over half a decade now. Still, I think it's most important to stress the fact that everything I come up with and will be talking about in this post is for fun. This shouldn't explicitly be seen as a vehicle for a potential fan game, I make these things for my own enjoyment and have no plans or obligations to turn any of these ideas into tangible content in the future. We all can pretty unanimously agree that it’s fun to dream about a theoretical continuation of this franchise, especially because of how it felt like it came to such an abrupt halt in a way none of us were really ready for. This project is simply meant to represent the changes I'd most want to see if that were to ever somehow happen, and that vision of mine simply might not appeal to your individual preferences.

But now moving to the fun stuff itself. I strive to be as in-depth as possible when taking into account how I would rework the gameplay, taking a comprehensive look at the entire series. To keep things feeling familiar while also feeling like an "evolution" of sorts, I found it most compelling to try and utilize standout mechanics from all three of the previous games. Yes, that includes Frontier because, while I can't defend its battle system as a whole, I do think there are some features it introduced that can really enhance potential team building and strategy (mainly referring to the boost system it uses).

Since there are far too many changes to cover in a text post, I created a PowerPoint to explain everything in a more presentable and organized way. The link to it can be found directly below this paragraph, with the presentation being separated in order of different areas of discussion, from how vivosaurs have changed to the differences in the battle system to new and altered abilities and so much more! Plus, attached to this post are the stat sheets for every single vivosaur, #1-300. My own vivosaurs as well as the 10 unique vivosaurs from Frontier are included in the lineup, and all the vivosaurs you're already familiar with have received numerous changes and enhancements to their skill sets so that they can thrive in this new Fossil Battling format.

Link to the PowerPoint (in case the picture quality is too poor to be able to read on this website)

FFO Mechanics.pptx

Link to all 300 vivosaurs and their stat sheets:

FFO All Vivosaurs.pptx

(Disclaimer: not all of the vivosaurs have artwork to correspond with their dino medals, but those will be hopefully trickling out down the line in the future.)

To round things out, I definitely want to thank the people that have already been supporting me and the things I create these past few years elsewhere. Without the level of the recognition and approval I see from the people who always respond to what I make, I definitely never would've come this far with developing my ideas. You guys are the ones who've been enjoying these things, from vivosaurs to characters to the overarching story I hope to one day be able to share with you all. I owe it to you for allowing myself to become as invested in my favorite series as I now am. And hey, depending on how people react to what I have here I may make another post outlining the more creative story and character elements I have in mind… 

Thank you to everyone who's been there for all this time, as well as anyone willing to read through everything I've been able to put together here, this project never could've been completed without you all for me to share it with.

[vani11a-ice]

So, any unpopular opinions about Star Wars Legends that you have? I'm perfectly willing to listen.

Lmao hi, I didn’t expect to see you here! I really liked your Mara Jade criticism/analysis, and I saw your thoughts about my silly little hashtags—off topic to the ask but yes I definitely agree it’s too late to do anything with Mara Jade now given her story already concluded in Legends/EU verse, not to mention Disney now own the rights so that couldn’t even happen. If she were rewritten however she definitely could be far greater of a character.

As for your kind ask, when it comes to Star Wars EU there’s a lot to unpack because there’s so much content, but I guess I can give an overall opinion to make it more concise (But brace yourself, I will be yapping quite a bit anyways on here lol).

I generally love Legends. I grew up mainly with the central Lucas canon many years before Disney acquired the franchise: obviously the movies and 2008 clone wars series, and then some small EU content such as video games and some children’s comics/books before I even knew what the EU was. Because of this, I think it’s easy for me and many others to look back on the old stuff and be nostalgic for it.

But now that I’m older and gotten back into Star Wars (after losing interest in it for a while due to the sequels), I now have a better grasp of Legends content as well as a lot of lore I didn’t know as a kid—mainly books about what happens post ROTJ—and one thing I’ve noticed is that the quality highly fluctuates. On the one hand you get some amazing stuff like the Old Republic era, some of the Clone wars comics, old Battlefield games, the Darth Plagueis novel, the Prequel novelisations, Thrawn, Clone Wars 2003 and ofc many more. On the other hand, you get some pretty ridiculous stuff too, like Dark Empire, Shadows of the Empire, the Force Unleashed (Ironically, I actually really like this game for the nostalgia, its gameplay, Galen himself, story potential and the memes but many events of the game itself do not realistically make sense lol) and many books post ROTJ (mind you haven’t read all of them, way too many lol) that kind of have plot points I’m not too happy with and I could go on forever about (and some others I probably haven’t thought of).

My main point is, many legends fans will always advocate that the solution to Disney’s less than stellar Star Wars works recently is doing adaptations of existing legends material. And whilst I do think that there is a lot of lore you can pluck from legends and reuse/rewrite for their potential (I mean Disney already does that with characters like Thrawn), I never would want a 1-1 recreation. First of all, Legends started before the prequels so a lot of it doesn’t make complete sense now anyways (Hot take, but post-prequel-movies legends has always been better overall in terms of quality. For this reason, Old Republic/Prequel era was handled better overall than New Republic era). Additionally, Legends just isn’t as consistent or good overall as people would like to believe. It’s a large universe with several different writers, there’s bound to be mistakes/bad works riddled throughout here and there.

I also don’t think there’s enough people that talk about (especially) the older legends materials’ problematic elements as well. I’m not always a huge fan of how certain writers treat female and even other minority/non-human characters in Legends. I’m sure you’re familiar with this with people like Mara Jade. One of my other personal main gripes just to list another example is Leia. I’ve always hated how sidelined she is because she was always my personal favourite as a child, and the writers throughout the continuity could not make up their mind on whether she should be a Jedi or not to the point where her skills largely varied between writers until they finally decided to make it official when she’s much much older. Even by then she’s already overshadowed by her children/brother. George Lucas himself didn’t always write her or other female characters in the best way either, but I always thought an EU continuity would be the perfect place to give her the attention she deserves, instead all we got was an inconsistent arc, especially after the Thrawn trilogy. Disney could have turned this around but unfortunately the exact same thing happened where they couldn’t make up their mind on whether she was a Jedi or not (and gave her the shittiest excuse for quitting—how ironic that both Legends and Disney write in immediate motherhood and marriage as a sexist obstacle rather than actually letting her character grow before/during these events).

Fanatic Legends fans will, however, unfortunately rarely agree or at least try to understand criticism of their favourite universe, and, in my view, this is no better than Disney Adults who vehemently reject criticism of some of the worst recent Star Wars media that’s been released.

To conclude this long ass rant, I just think Star Wars EU whether that be Legends or Disney could do with rewriting/organisation here and there. But that’s highly unlikely, so a more realistic solution is just to pick and choose the media you enjoy from both universes (or make up your own!) and just accept it as your own personal canon. That’s what gives me peace and mind anyways :)

[real-life-senshi]

hellow, i hope so far you´re doing ok since i saw you were struggling a bit with your health. though i'm quite new to your content i finally got the time to check some of your writings, i'd say i ended pretty hooked on them ahsfgsdjhs, tbh i'm not much of a fic reader of anything at all, specially since i don't think i have seen anything sailor moon related since my teens lmao. But i still wanted to let you know that i'm glad i have found it, as i tried to recall some about the pgsm plot (there's a chance i must have ended rewatching it ahsjhdsj and my gosh there were so many subtle things i missed 'cause i watched it when i was quite young haha) there were some other things that came to my mind that i wish were explored on the series, curiously most of it i found it on your fics 🤣 (i really like the way you expanded the pgsm characters through your stories) there were even some parts when i could 100% visualize them, may i have randomly doodle some stuff, who knows(?, oh! and your drawings as well, i saw this one about the Final Act *chef kiss*👌

There are other things i'd like to comment but i don't want to spoil anything as in Ao3 there are only 6 of the rest unlike the other fic site; i'm a big fan of the V manga (it's probably the one i sometimes read to remind myself why Minako is one of my fave characters ever! though my 11 year old self would disagree cause was obssesed with Manga/tokusatsu Mars😂 ) and also the continuity of the past life lore, whether if at some point in a near future as long as you're doing ok, please take care, for real. I'm looking forward to stay tuned if there's anything new from you 🙌

omg omg omg omg!!!!

You are the sweetest! 🥹Thank you for dropping by and leaving this lovely message in my inbox. Your keyboard smashing makes me go askdfhdsafdk as well! It's the highest praise one can give me. LOL😂

And jfc your amazing EoT based art? And there's potentially more doodles???? I can't believe that's happening to one of my stories. It's just not something I thought would ever be possible I don't even know what else to say except for repeating 'thank you' x10000 time.

Your message definitely encouraged me to finish chapter 7 instead of stalling some more. Made my week knowing one more person enjoys my attempt at writing a sequel. <3 My plan for the story is so ambitious sometimes I wonder if I'll be able to finish it. I even have plans to write a past life prequel and hope to do a bridging Black Moon story before introducing a Mugan arc sequel to EoT... That's 3 more stories total... and right now writing at a snail's pace, I don't know if that's ever possible... :'(

I'm finally on the road to recovery so it's getting easier for me to sit in front of my laptop for hours on end again. I've been mostly using video games to distract myself from the discomfort coz I can easily change positions while holding the console with no problem. With a laptop... there's a limitation with the keyboard for writing and the mouse for drawing. (LMAO I still use a mouse to draw. Never learnt to properly use a drawing tablet, even though I bought one long ago it just gathering dust now...)

Yeah... I think I peaked with the final act illustration when it comes to fanart. lol Knowing I did manage to make something with a quality that even surprised me, I've been overthinking and overcomplicating all the new ideas I want to do and then my brain and hand freeze and things are left as wip. 🙈

I'm really glad you enjoy my blog content. I practically owe my life to PGSM, I Iove the series with my whole being, cheesiness and faults and all. So it makes me really happy when my blog can help introduce or reignite interest in the series for other people! <3

I hope you don't mind me posting this reply instead of responding privately. I want to keep your message archived on my blog coz I love it so much. <3

[talesfromthebacklog]

Tales From The Backlog: Cattails

7/10

In the simplest way I can put this: It’s Stardew Valley but with cats!

With. CATS.

At least that’s how I saw it initially described. And it’s a pretty accurate description for what it is. It was also $3 on sale with a newly released sequel. Which I view sequels as a potential indicator of quality. Not necessarily high quality but played enough where developers thought: “Yeah. More than one. People might like that.”

And I do. I do like this game a lot. It deserved an expanded sequel. It’s a life sim RPG where you are a cat abandoned on the side of the road by your owner and you are taken in by other local cats into a cat colony. It’s cute. I like this game SO MUCH. The sequel looks even better!!!

My cat’s name is Butter. Let’s talk about it!

I like cozy games. But cats aren’t really my thing? I like them. I like petting them and all that junk. But cats are like horses. The people who like cats are REALLY into cats. Just like horse people. You know? Meaning: Cat games aren’t my thing. Horse games are.

I don’t even remember how I stumbled across this game. I think it was blind luck because nothing about the art or the name denotes what kind of experience it will be other than cat.

Hence why I didn’t use it as the opener pic. The art is cute though. Though on Switch this same art is really pixelated when it was used as the title screen. And not in an intentional way. It comes across like it was blown up too big on the screen.

And I play in handheld mode 90% of the time. Not a complaint, just an observation.

Regardless of how I ran into the game, what was in this $3 package?

A pretty great experience actually. Simple. Cute. It had more content than I expected it to. It is not an empty experience.

Like Stardew Valley there are various familiar elements:

There’s the cat shrine, which is like the community center. You bring various specific goods to unlock things. In this case it unlocks little puzzles to work on throughout the map which also reward you. While not finished this is a breeze to get through.

There’s the town bulletin board in which you complete quests to earn special currency to get special items.

There are marriage candidates. You can get married to another cat. I can’t decide between Krampy and Alisa. Very different vibes.

Yes you can have kittens and they can look like a mix between the player character and your spouse. Ridiculous. I LOVE THAT. This is the gameplay I want to see!

I’m pretty satisfied with the writing of the NPCs. Not the most top tier but a lot of these style of games get overly childish dialogue. Cattails does not suffer from this problem. Thank lord. It doesn’t need to be mature but like… I don’t want to be able to hear you pronounce the word frog with a w just by looking at the text. You know?

Fwog.

The map is almost completely open world. You have to earn your way into little sub areas, but in majority you can do what you want to do and see what you want to see. The game actively rewards you for checking nooks and crannies. The game doesn’t hold your hand and direct you too much though. The game lightly nudges you in the right direction when you follow the main story. Some mechanics aren’t explained well, like the cat colony control thing (I’ll go into this more in a bit). The game is gracious enough to have a short mechanics tutorial though. I love short basic bread and butter tutorials. Some folks like this kind of stuff, some don’t. Just know that out the gate.

Then there’s the mole mines. You dig for treasure and sell it to the moles for special currency to get special items. There’s no crafting element though.

And with no crafting there is no chests, storage, etc. but this is balanced well. Prey is abundant (you will die if you don’t eat) and you aren’t crafting so storage is entirely unnecessary.

There are seasonal festivals with mini games and special prizes. Those are cute.

Then there are the differences. Starting with no farming. Kind of a special rarity. A lot of the cozy game genre leans on farming pretty hard. Maybe almost too much so despite how much I love it. At least in this first game. The second game had screenshots that had farming (Not a complaint.). This game largely depends on you hunting and foraging. It’s cute and different. I like that. The hunting is actually pretty fun too. Weather and season affects your hunting. You have to tie yourself and stalk prey.

On top of the hunting there is very light combat. This is either in the mines or against other randomly named cats in the over world (and the cat names do NOT disappoint). You get to choose which out of three colonies you join. From here on out you are in a constant territorial dispute. On your map screen you can see which areas of the map are dominated, or in the process of domination, by your colony and other colonies. There are two territorial disputes a day to help you sway favor in these zones.

And of course cats from your colony are there to help you! The only, thankfully abusable, downside is that the number of cats generated to both help and attack you are random. But if the numbers aren’t in your favor you can just literally exit and come back until they are.

Combat itself is basic. There are skills and items you can get that do small things to help (like poisoning your claws with local plants? Brutal! I love it). But while basic it is still entertaining to be in little cat wars.

Especially since it also allows for other “towns” to exist. Which a lot of these types of games really lack. There’s something appealing to me about needing to travel to a separate community as a player. I feel like it makes the world seem bigger.

Which you must earn your way in by offering gifts to these communities. It’s basic but I’m hoping by the time I finish and play the second game they will have expanded on it because it’s super fun to see your colony dominating the area. I didn’t expect this game to hit like it did.

It also has an experience point mechanic. Completing pretty much any activity successfully will net you experience points. Hunting, fighting, mining, etc. You then spend those points to raise your skills which can unlock additional special abilities. Again. Basic but in an extremely functional way. Basic isn’t always bad.

There is better cat customization once you enter the game but you gotta earn it. Which feels fair. There is nothing that is painfully out of reach. I do wish there was a baby bit of house customization but I get why it’s not there. It’s literally not needed.

…But it would be cool to have a cat tree in the house or upgrades to make it visually more appealing. That kind of stuff. I’m hoping the sequel expanded on this too.

The art style in majority is… alright. Except for Krampy. That plague doctor mask is so… good. It’s looks so silly. I kind of wish they leaned on that kind of style more? It’s good but could use a stronger sense of visual identity. Which they definitely provided for the sequel. The assets and general world look a lot more lived in and full.

There’s also small things missing that aren’t a big deal breaker but I want to see in the future. Like a relationship chart in the menu. There’s no dedicated map button. The mini map is largely useless. The game emphasizes you have to take care of yourself and I wish there were one or two more survival elements to keep the player on their toes, especially since the current survival mechanics are almost too manageable.

I like that sleeping doesn’t heal you. You need to either find meds or get healed at the doctor. And both are in plenty supply. You’re never hurting that bad where it’s not easy to get healed.

You’ll notice I haven’t mentioned much about the story. Mostly because the story isn’t terribly remarkable. You gotta get the world back in balance by finishing the community center cat shrine. That’s the story. It doesn’t need to be deep though. Let’s be real. That’s not why you’d play the game. You’re playing for cat and gameplay. It does that job fine.

Overall, I wasn’t expecting this solid of an experience. If it had a physical I’d be apt to recommend it to the folks who are more inclined to like these kind of titles. I would say likely out of the two you can probably skip the first game and just head right for the second for that expanded experience.

But also the first game was $3 when I bought it. Hard to beat that price point when you’re trying a new game out for the first time.

By the looks of it I can expect an even stronger experience from the sequel. Which I’ll get to.

…Eventually.

……Someday.

[postgamecontent]

Nintendo Switch Weekly Round-Up for the Week Ending November 30th, 2024

Hello gentle readers, and welcome to the Nintendo Switch Weekly Round-Up for the week ending November 30th, 2024. A pretty rough week this time around, but I suppose that's to be expected as we make our way into the last weeks of the year. Still, there are a few reasonably well-known games in the lot, and a few interesting oddballs. Let's check out this week in the world of Switch!

Featured New Releases

Riviera: The Promised Land ($34.99)

Sting's cult favorite tactical RPG has been available on the Switch for quite a while in Japan, but it seems like the publisher finally decided to give it a localization. There are some new quality of life features here, but the game itself remains basically the same as it ever was. I'm not sure I'd call it great, but it's certainly interesting in how it's designed. Do you want it on the Switch? Here it is.

Nine Sols ($29.99)

If you're looking for more of that Metroidvania-meets-Soulslike flavor that was all the rage a few years ago, this will likely be right up your alley. It's parry-heavy though, so make sure you're down with that kind of tight timing-based gameplay. The striking art style and over-the-top boss battles are the highlights here, but it's just a really well-made game all around. Something to hold the Hollow Knight fans over until Silksong, which is definitely, totally coming soon I'm sure.

Dungeons of Dreadrock 2 - The Dead King's Secret ($14.99)

Dungeons of Dreadrock was one of those games that seemed unassuming, but the further you played into it the more compelling it got. Well, here's a sequel and it does just about everything you would want a sequel to do. In a lot of ways it resembles the first game, but the puzzles are trickier, the story is more involved, and the dungeons are… you know, dreadrockier. If you enjoyed the original, this is an easy recommendation.

Crystal Breaker ($14.99)

Here's the latest shooter from indie developer Terarin, and this one has a bit of a Compile-meets-Star Force feel to it. The focus as usual is on the score attack aspect, and it's very well-built towards that end. You'll be rewarded for aggressive play in this game, with higher scoring potential if you get right up in the faces of your foes. I've played this one a fair bit already, and it's as good as you would expect from this developer.

The Epyx Games - Sports Collection ($11.99)

If you had a Commodore 64 back in the day like I did, then this collection probably doesn't need much introduction. You get every Commodore 64 game in the series, from Summer Games all the way up to The Games. Championship Wrestling is also in here, for good measure. Eight games all up, which is a lot of waggling and mashing for your money. The original manuals have also been included, which is very important as pretty much every event in these games has its own rules and controls. The strength of these games has always been in multiplayer, and up to eight players can compete locally here. I have a soft spot for these games, and that is absolutely nostalgia talking. You will have to decide how you feel on your own.

Arcade Archives Fantastic Night Dreams Cotton ($7.99)

Success' popular horizontal shooter featuring the charming candy-crazed witch Cotton arrives on Arcade Archives. This game has a ton of character and plays really well, too. It almost feels out of place for the year it released in. We've already had the X68000 version on Switch as an extra mode in the remake, but if you want the true arcade original, here it is.

Snow Bros. Wonderland ($29.99)

A release that presents many questions to ponder. Can Tatsujin as it exists today make a game worthy of the Toaplan legacy? Can Snow Bros. work in 3D? Is this a brand where people should even be asking for a third installment? From what I've played of this game so far, the answer to all of those questions is a surprising yes. I'm not going to say this is as good as the original, but it's rather fun.

Super Nodage World ($11.42)

Another round of Noda games for those who enjoyed the bizarre antics of the first set. Multiplayer fun locally or online, with lots of unusual scenarios offering varying degrees of entertainment. It's hard to write much about this in one paragraph, I suppose. It's a bunch of experimental game ideas, many of which riff off other games. Something for those looking for a different experience today.

Ironfall Invasion ($17.99)

This game is noteworthy for two reasons. First, it reflected the reputation of VD-DEV's games by being a technical showpiece on its original hardware, in this case the Nintendo 3DS. Second, it was the source of one of the earlier exploits on the handheld. It is not noteworthy for its gameplay quality, and there's a reason for that. Since those first two things don't really matter for this release, I think it's pretty hard to recommend in any capacity.

Sun Haven ($29.99)

Ideally this would be another good option for fans of Stardew Valley, but instead I must spend this paragraph issuing a warning. Do not buy this until it's had at least a few patches, because right now it's a broken crash-fest. I'm surprised the developer released it in this state, to be honest. There's apparently at least one hotfix incoming, but I'd very much play this as a wait-and-see until it gets its house in order.

Neon Blood ($20.99)

If I was handing out prizes for sheer graphical style, this game would fare a lot better. Unfortunately, I don't hand out any prizes at all. If I did, they would be for how many Spider-Mans a game has. This one has none, but it's an okay-ish adventure anyway. Sometimes there's some turn-based combat, and that's not very good at all. Come for the sights, if at all. You can probably do better at this price point, though.

Crown Wars: The Black Prince ($49.99)

I find when a genre doesn't have many games out in a given period, even the mediocre stuff can rise up. On the other hand, when a genre is well-represented, there isn't much reason to bother with games that are merely decent. That's especially the case when the genre involves games that take dozens of hours to finish. Anyway, this is a long way of telling you that you should probably give this particular strategy RPG a skip. It has a lot of technical issues but even if those weren't here it's hard to get enthused about what it has to offer.

Tokyo Psychodemic ($29.99)

Solve mysteries by examining footage and searching for evidence. Gather clues and put them together on your wacko board to try to come up with the real story behind each crime. This has been out on Steam for a while, and I can't remember the last time I saw a game with so many negative reviews from Japanese players. The main complaint seems to be that the story is terrible. I'm going to take their word for it, and you might want to as well.

Steam Prison -Beyond the Steam- ($44.62)

This is essentially a fandisk follow-up to Steam Prison. If you liked that game and are hungry for more, here you go. If you didn't like it or were fully satisfied with what it had to offer, then don't bother. If you haven't played the first game, you've got no business starting here. Well, that was easy. Next!

EGGCONSOLE The Scheme PC-8801mkIISR ($6.49)

What a name that is. The Scheme. You're probably imagining some kind of heist game or something, but this is actually a side-scrolling action-adventure game whose main claim to fame is its soundtrack by Yuzo Koshiro. Still, it's reasonably playable even if you don't understand Japanese, and that soundtrack is pretty decent. Must you have it? Probably not. But you might want to!

Mission in Snowdriftland ($8.99)

A pretty generic platformer whose main selling point is that you can play one level per day, like an advent calendar! Of course, that means there are only twenty-four levels. Well, plus one more bonus level and the final boss. Super Mario Bros. has thirty-two levels, and if you want you can pretend it's a mega-advent calendar. I can guarantee you'll have more fun!

Glitch Hero ($11.99)

Take a bit of Zelda-ish top-down action adventure and add in some simple programming puzzles, and that seems to be the idea behind Glitch Hero. As it's something of an educational affair, I think the main target here might be the younger set. Not a terribly long game, but long enough for the idea and audience.

Leo's Fortune ($6.99)

Oh hey, it's Leo's Fortune. I remember when this came out on iOS not that long ago. Let me check exactly when. Oh, early 2014. Ha! Ha ha! Okay, well. This is a fun little platformer. It's a relatively short game, not much longer than the aforementioned Mission in Snowdriftland, but you'll have a much better experience with it. Note if you have Apple Arcade, you can play this there.

Om Nom: Run 2 ($4.99)

I guess what I will say is that if you're nostalgic for a particular era of mobile gaming, this checks off at least a couple of boxes.

That's all for this week, friends. We'll be back next Saturday as we roll into December and the final weeks of the year. Next week is a little quieter, with the biggest title so far looking to be Stray. Well, we'll make what we can of it. As ever, I will plug both my Patreon (where you can find lots of cool exclusive articles) and my Ko-Fi (tips help me run this blog). There, plugged. I hope you have a super Saturday, and as always, thanks for reading!

[littlesistersti]

List of stories ideas I want to write

Please provide feedback. I desperately need some and these all have dead-ends. So many dilemmas

Belarus x reader chapter book, titled The Girl in White

originally meant for F! reader but I can practice GN! reader 

there is a scene involving the Brain Games version of Russian Roulette

Belarus and Ukraine switching between Russian and their native Belarusian and Ukrainian somewhere, I don’t know when

post 2020 update: no Russian

Reader is the observant type

many chapters of potential “dates” but they keep thinking “we’re friends, just another day of quality time”

don’t know if it’s human or countries

Yes, I know the title is a song with political origins. It’s on purpose, kinda... I’m afraid of referring to the event at some point in the fic because fans will attack me for using real dangerous events in a fanfic (like the “It’s wrong to write fanfics with 9/11″ thing)

I’ve no intention of writing “Belarus faints while the news replay the thing” or “Belarus comes home bloodied and the reader is worried because they haven’t heard from her in days” 

I want to showcase the white and red flag but again, I’m afraid of doing something wrong over innocent intentions 

besides, there’s some sort of cultural pride with “girl in white” from what I gathered

a Transformers and X-Men crossover, starring a techno-organic (like TFA Sari Sumdac) as the adopted daughter of Erik Lensherr 

set in McAvoy, not Stewart, times

Erik is a little afraid of harming her because, you know, metal

Xavier and Erik both know she’s different (metal, not human but is she a mutant? Or what?) but not sure on the specifics

until a giant robot crashed the party

originally planned for TFP verse but I think I should writer it better as All Media or G1-esque or something close

is it better if everybody at the school knows protag is a techno-organic or no?

Seychelles taken by the Decepticons, a prequel to my absurd idea of a 4-way crossover

How is it she’s taken by KO and BD, charged under their watch, but then hangs out with the cassettes?

they’re both red and blue … why gut feeling says to choose one over the other?

Soundwave is designed after Capcom Kai’s ver

update: Seychelles won’t be affiliated with KOBD

speaking of which, a sequel to the crossover where KO proposed to BD with help from Seychelles (over video call) very extravagant human way

extra as in everybody in the perimeter watches you

most bots ignore because KO is being his usual 

BD planned a tradition proposal like in IDW

this was supposed short, as in chapter length, found at the end of the crossover book

update: this is now separate

Loki is the mother of reader/oc

I originally thought about writing 2 ver: Norse myth ver like how Rick Riordan does it (but my creative liberties) & Marvel Cinematic Universe ver or an AU take on MCU

didn’t know about Lady Loki at the time

today I’ve decided to better not write the MCU

Update: eh why not, I’ll write it

story ends with the family watching Eurovision 2012 and as Loreen performs Euphoria, Loki and protag felt that

this could be a real book professionally published like Riordan’s books but I’m not sure of the legal stuff

am I allowed to include a copyrighted song in there? Am I better off with a fanfiction site? 

this is supposed to be a story on self-discovery and accepting your sexual orientation/gender identity ... for Loki

but through the protag’s perspective and observations

yeah I could just write a different book of just Loki and the husband and kid but in Loki’s perspective

worse part is, I have no progress on the Original ver but spent time and effort on Marvel ver ... I imagined a Loki-esque dress and outfit

protag went to a Tony Stark hosted party with a friend (whose parents are affiliated with Stark or SHIELD, I don’t remember) and Loki sees protag wearing the dress and internally panics

cliché but someone spills something on the dress and Loki helps clean it up with his magic

I realized I don’t know how old is the protag

the Euphoria ver protag is a teenager, that’s all I know

she/they (is this a girl reader or a GN reader?) met Hel at younger age, made her a flower crown, doesn’t know she’s her half-sister until present time

why is the Loki thing so dang long

Update: I have changed plenty of the above plot. The Loki book (both Norse myth and Marvel ver’s) is no longer about accepting your identity but now about reconnecting with your biological mom. There’s plenty of real life stories on that sort of thing.

also update: this Loki thing is now a serious thing and I can’t explain anymore, will neither confirm/deny if any of the above will be included/scrapped 

Marvel ver of the Loki story has a GN reader who is comfortable wearing dresses, that’s all I got. I remember brainstorming with my sister and “reader is a fan of the Avengers, groupie behaviour” and I kinda hate that. It felt like a different story. 

[glassmarcus]

Bayonetta 3: Devil May Cry's Shadow Remains Cast

*Played in November 2022, Written in December 2022. Holy Shit, I was pissed off when I wrote this.

The first Bayonetta was pretty damn good. Combat was slick, the attack list seemed endless, the music was hot, you could hold ZR to simultaneously break dance and shoot people, and each level had this cinematic flavor to it. Bayonetta was a game with personality and despite its roots to the Devil May Cry Franchise, it was truly one of a kind. It had problems with egregious Quick Time Events and drawn out mini games, but coming back to it after a decade of character action releases, I'm still impressed with the enemy design quality and how brutal yet earned the ranking system is. The core gameplay is tight and the flourishes of personality are icing on the cake. Bayonetta was a fun character to watch and control, and really put the stylish in the stylish action genre.

Bayonetta 2 is pretty damn good as well. It looks far better than Bayonetta 1 and runs smoother to boot. While the first game was plagued with bad mini games and quick time events, this game irons that stuff out and is mostly just combat, the thing we primarily come to these games for. Everything is streamlined in Bayonetta 2. There's nothing stopping you from having fun. You can use your Umbran Climax to solve any situation, you can avoid Sega arcade homages (for the most part), you aren’t penalized for using items really, you can still hold ZR to break dance, and the game won't kill or punish you for unfair reasons. But I feel like it loses a lot by taking this approach. Achieving Platinum ranks is less satisfying and it feels less cinematic as well due to how homogenized the experience is. There’s no changes in pace, just consistent gameplay that never really reaches the heights of it’s predecessor. Bayonetta 2 is smoother, but is also far less memorable. Because of this, I could never decide which one was better.

Bayonetta 3 was the perfect chance to find a balance between the first two games and become the best of them all. And it... doesn't even attempt to do this. It goes in an entirely different trajectory, creating undeniable peaks, but also brand new problems. In terms of raw gameplay I think this is the best game of the trilogy with a few reservations. It doesn't run as well as them due to its eyes being bigger than the Nintendo Switch’s stomach. The aesthetic and mechanical design of the enemies pales in comparison to the ones in previous games. But the options you are given in combat are substantially varied and those mini games and set pieces are all fine at worst and a wonderful palette cleansers at best. Aside from that Big the Cat ditch digging mini game. That was pretty bad.

Bayonetta 3 is not just a sequel to Bayonetta 2. It's somewhat of a spiritual sequel to Astral Chain in its combat philosophy. I’d say the combat is the perfect blend between the two. Astral Chain had simpler and slower combat than most titles developed by Platinum Games, but had the widest variance of moves you could pull off within a single fight. There are 15 combinations of move sets you can freely switch between, each with their own advantages and draw backs, and you are encouraged to play that way. You technically play as two characters, so the move sets aren't as cohesive as most action games, but the moves themselves never blend together and always have a functional clarity to them.

The first two Bayonettas are no strangers to having move set combinations. You are able to equip two weapons at a time, one Bayonetta can use for her hands and one for her feet. You can mix and match the weapons to create a custom arsenal which you can equip up to two of at a time. It’s less than the 15 in Astral Chain, but those 2 move sets have a ton of depth on their own. And while you do need to pause the game to select them, you do have dozens of potential combinations at your disposal. You can set up around 36 unique move sets in the first game and 56 in the second. That's an insane tool box to hand players and I have to respect it.

Unfortunately I feel the provided depth isn't that accessible and feels unnecessary a lot of the time. You can build a ton of stuff with it and even switch between move sets mid combo, but I never felt the need to do any of that in the 60 hours I spent playing the first one. Each weapon you get in Bayonetta has a long list of button inputs you use to pull off a different attack, but many of those attacks feel functionally the same and not worth learning once you understand a few effective strings. It’s far more important to learn the universal moves you buy throughout the adventure.

Bayonetta 3 has abandoned the mixing and matching and has adopted the two character approach. Only this time, your core abilities are on par with as any individual Bayonetta move set. You still get to control your second character with its own abilities which are more complex than the ones in Astral Chain. Minor note: the second character is a Kaiju. Bayonetta 3 meets a compromise. 6 combinations you can access without pausing, but each combination is deeper than either game and within the menu, you can equip 156 move sets. There's not quite as much sauce for Bayonetta herself, but there's more variety than ever before. Because the summons and weapons are so disjointed, each one has more mechanical diversity because they don't have to fit into the same frame work. They use the same inputs for the universal moves, but those inputs have way more variance in their output. They all have spin attacks, stingers, launchers, and triple jumps, but you never quite know the additional elements of these moves. Before I could divide weapons into 3 categories: arm weapons, feet weapons, or weapons that can go on either limb. Now I'd say there are no weapon types aside from the gun and not gun. Each weapon is it’s own thing and because of that, they are more interesting to use.

Variety is what Bayonetta 3 is all about. It is loaded with gameplay flavors. Shifting in controls, visual styles, and goals is just the way it rolls. I've seen a lot of people say this is a bad thing, making it harder to replay if you just want combat. While I can sympathize, it doesn't bother me all that much really. You can just skip past them like you could in Astral Chain and once you get 1 platinum rank on it, you never have to play it ever again. It’s a bit annoying on your first playthrough if you aren’t a fan. While the grading isn't as harsh as I’d like it to be, I do appreciate this replay system due to how much time it saves. And I get that some people just don't want the alternate gameplay styles at all, but I feel like a big part of Bayonetta is weird variety and this game has that in spades.

If I wanted a solid game where I just fight, I’d play Devil May Cry 5 because it's the best at being that. In a lot of ways Bayo 3 ends up feeling like a lesser DMC5 and gets lost in it’s enormous shadow, but having weird set pieces around every bend really sets it apart. Bayonetta 3 is the best at giving you a buffet in which every dish is decent and the main entrees are delectable. The breadth this game has to offer cannot be understated. There's even multiple characters to play as and they're....fine. Jeanne's levels are fine at least. Harmless I'd say because they take like 20 minutes of the total play time. Viola's are good once you get used to controlling her and come to terms with how Bayonetta is simply a better character to play. I started really enjoying the interplay between her armed and unarmed gameplay...and then the game kinda ends. I like Viola. I love her attitude. I love her cringe. And her theme song fucking shreds. My issue with the variety in Bayonetta 3 isn’t that there's too much and that none of it is good, but that some of it should be more fleshed out.

And then there's the level design which I think clenches why I prefer 3 from a design perspective. The past games felt cramped and cheap. The first game reuses a lot of map assets and a lot of the middle levels feel the same as the beginning ones. The levels themselves were often plagued with rough platforming and cramped space. The cramped space isn't an issue at all when trying to just play the game like a normal human being. But when they try to hide secrets, they run out of places to logically put them. This means you need to back track in order for the secrets to appear. It is a gross display of truly unhinged level craft. 2 has less of it, but it's still there. This most recent take on level design solves all of this. Worlds change drastically in aesthetic every 3 chapters so you never get tired of the stage flavor and the maps are more open and vertical. This gives opportunities to hide secrets in spots that require exploring new areas. The placement of these bonuses also force you to learn the movement mechanics granted by each weapon, making reaching them feel earned. And during replays (or just the first playthrough really, no one is forcing you to explore honestly), you can just B-line to the critical path like the other games. While the levels are wider, they aren’t much longer. The rewards for the secrets are also far better now. Instead of unlocking bonus features when finding Umbran Animals, you get actual new side levels which give their own rewards that end up being substantial.

So as far as gameplay goes, it clears the other two for me. It’s not quite a vertical improvement, but it feels kinda marketed towards me. Bayonetta 1 still has the most solid combat due to enemies attacking you from off screen the least. Bayonetta 2 takes it on an aesthetic and performance level easily. But 3 just tries so many things that I end up liking. I’m a fan of Astral Chain because it made it very easy to do a plethora of actions that required your brain to be in two separate places at once. Pulling off a tag team attack with your stand was satisfying in a way that doing a fat combo wasn't. And in Bayonetta 3, you can do both. There was no way I wouldn't be a huge fan of it. I ultimately had an absolute blast playing this….But good lord does it get dragged down in terms of character, narrative, and general vibes.

Much like how this game handles its tone, this review is about to take a drastic shift, Spoilers ahead, not that you should care about that.

This story is really bad. Nothing is explained clearly, no motivations are stated, people don't communicate like real humans, crucial details are presented as optional. It's nonsense. Bayonetta 3 refuses to linger on any details and denies the player any semblance of certainty. Everything in this narrative is fluid. Things just sort of happen and it doesn't matter how little sense it makes or stupid it feels, you just have to accept it. You can argue that the previous games were pretty bad too and only existed to drive the next set piece, but they still drove them. They got you to where you needed to go. I still understood the general plot points of those stories. Bayonetta 3 envelops the essence of 9 year old me, slamming my toys and stuffed animals together, imagining a story around it on the fly. Only it's less excusable here because this game has 4 writers and I am certain not a single one of them were in elementary school. Why are there no meaningful exchanges or reactions between characters? Why did the villain do anything he did? What the fuck is a fairy in this context? Who the hell is Dark Eve? Why did Bayonetta fail every single perception check she was tasked with? So many questions, most of them probably answered in the in-game data books I refuse to read through. This isn't Dark Souls and even Dark Souls is structured so that you can understand it without external reading. Because its plot is simple and makes sense. While this plot is neither of those things.

But I don't play Bayonetta for the story, I play Bayonetta for the personality. I play it to see cool characters do over the top things. I play it to see wacky dances in the middle of tense situations. I play it because I want to see a confident dominatrix make everyone around her look pathetic. The third entry kinda fumbles that last point. The character of Luka basically exist for Bayonetta to tease and belittle. Luka tries to act cool, and fails in the presence of a character who is actually cool, and then gets sent off to babysitter duty. That's what their dynamic was in past games. I'm not just upset they end up together at the end, and I’m not just upset the romance wasn't competently built up. I'm upset that their dynamic is that of equals, as Luka is presented as an extremely important figure here. Bayonetta... overtly respects Luka. It makes me sick. We don't need that shit. Bayonetta and Rodin are equals. Bayonetta and Jeanne are equals. If they are truly meant to be together throughout space and time, Luka should be the M to Bayonetta's S. But in 3, he's kinda just a cool confident guy who is a bit clumsy sometimes and also Faerie Jesus I guess. Why in the world does the story frame them as being soul mates across dimensions? He's just some dude. I can even get behind Viola being their love child. Them having sex eventually, in another universe, seems very plausible. But this "I don’t know what I would do without you" crap is a step too far.

Bayonetta is as representative of an independent woman as you can get. Yet she is assigned her corporate mandated male lover right at the end because someone needs to protect her. This run of the mill dorky guy getting the girl way out of his league shtick is something we've seen thousands of times and its deeply upsetting to see Bayonetta helplessly veer in that direction. It makes her so...ordinary. She's supposed to be one of a kind. Yet this game goes out of its way to make her relatively basic. In previous games she has sadistic fun with what she does. It's shown frequently in the cutscenes and the torture attacks. She feels in control at nearly all times. Here, it has dialed back those tendencies and makes torture attacks instant. She has a much weaker dominatrix aura now and that was a huge part in what made Bayonetta such a genius power fantasy. You get to play a hot woman exerting her twisted will on hideous beings. That's the dream! Bayonetta getting ousted to the Hetero-normative Malbolge is a fucking nightmare.

Mask off: If Luka was a girl I'd probably roll my eyes 50% less. I would still think it's bad, but at the very least it shows that queer people can have terribly developed romances as well and I think that's important for today's youth to understand.

It all feels a bit soulless at times. Exciting moments occur, but the context around them is meaningless. Things pop off and you want to indulge in the action movie schlock, but then it does whatever it can to undercut that moment. Everything in this game is punctuated by gritty deaths or intensely unfunny slapstick. When the game wants to be serious it chickens out and decides to be goofy. When the game wants to be fun, it dumps all over the party with the most downer shit possible. When tragedies are occurring, you're expected to cheer for over the top action. Bayonetta 3 is a playable Modern Action Movie. All Bayonetta Games are like this. But the Modern Action Movies of today are dissimilar to the Modern Action Movies of the 2000s.

It adopts the same bathos that has been plaguing the movie industry for years. It’s allergic to being sincere for too long despite the actual events being pretty dire. It undercuts it’s own plot constantly til the very end. Then presents itself as if it has any value. You DID have value Bayonetta 3. And then you grated at it, bit by bit, until all that was left were bitter shavings of quality sanded down by a coarse veneer of self apathy. Bayonetta 3 feels like it doesn't have pride in itself. It has self image issues. It wants to be DMC 5. It wants to be Astral Chain 2. It wants to be a billion dollar grossing Marvel movie. But it doesn't want to be Bayonetta. It almost gets away with these insecurities in terms of gameplay alone. But the narrative just whisper screams: “we don't actually like Bayonetta that much if we're gonna be real”. That's why you see every iteration of her die. That's she's as milquetoast as she's ever been. That's why they hand down the torch to Viola, a character they couldn't even bother making the dueteragonist. She had the potential to represent all the neurosis the game seems to have, yet she couldn’t even amount to that.

I didn't expect my feelings on the story to be so strong. I didn't really care for the first game's story, but I just kind of accepted it. It didn't have to be good to add to the game. It gave context and ample excuses for the cool stuff I wanted to see and gave the characters room to show who they were. Bayonetta 3 provided context which actively detracts from my enjoyment. I can still replay it and ignore it, but it’s tainted. I play Bayonetta 3 the same way I re-watch How I Met Your Mother, with a charitable lens that doesn't help when the bullshit piles up at the end of the story. The game is still good, but I don't like it as much because it pissed me off to this degree. Which is why I struggle to put this on the same pedigree as the other Bayonetta games. I will if pressed, but it gets by on a technicality just by being "mechanically interesting" to me. It feels like this was made into a Bayonetta game just so that the franchise could have another winner. It's a ringer. I beat it and got a strange feeling that I couldn't place at the time, but now I can. Bayo 3 hustled me. Bayonetta 3 dawn's the masquerade of a Bayonetta game and plays the role so well that we have no choice but to believe it. But you might be keen enough to spot the true difference between it and it's fore bearers. Because of all the story, character and major gameplay decisions this game makes, none of them disqualify it from being a true sequel other than this:

You can't hold ZR to break dance in this game.

[gwhite2by2]

Project Proposal

Weaknesses

In my opinion the biggest thing that held back my previous project was uneven use of time to complete the goals I’d set for myself. I frequently created daily and weekly plans but often failed to reach my own goals by becoming too focused on one thing that might not even matter that much which led to other parts falling behind. I can improve this project by including allocated time slots for myself within my plans like abbreviated daily plans with my weekly plans and sections on what I plan to do in the 4 sections each college day is split up into.

Collaboration

Due to my difficulties working around people I’m going to try and implement collaboration in less conventional ways by making use of AI generated music for use in the game itself and also for determining the tone of the game since I’ve used music to do that for my previous project. I also plan on implementing collaboration directly into the game itself with an AI companion that helps the player in various ways during runs and having NPC’s on an ark work together to keep it in order which means that collaboration is implemented in the mechanics and narrative of my project as well as outside of the game itself.

Project Concept

For this project I want to put greater emphasis on the narrative and spend a large part of the project creating scripts and character profiles to show that since I’ve always attempted to have unique narratives but they often get pushed to the side and not properly fleshed out so I want to make sure they I learn to properly structure and write narrative and I plan to do this within the template of a sequel to my arcade game which I think had a lot of missed potential particularly on the narrative side. The game will focus on the main character from my arcade game capitaning an ark going out on runs to find and save any other survivors. However the player will always come across pairs of survivors and after talking to their spirits, which amplify their worst qualities, the player has to then decide which one of them gets to live and make it onto the ark giving the narrative a thematic backbone of in a cataclysmic event who would really deserve to make it out and do other people get to decide that. The player character will also be accompanied by their own spirit which will amplify their growing god complex from deciding who gets to live and die and it will also help the player out in various ways like dropping items or periodically healing. The game will also have a rogue lite structure similar to my previous projects as well as a hub world (the ark) where the player can see and talk to the people they’ve rescued.

[cadybear420]

My unpopular Choices opinions:

ROD was a confusing mess of a book that didn't feel emotional to me at all. And even if I did like it, I'd still think it worked fine as a standalone.

ATV does not get nearly enough love. It has plenty of issues, but I found way more redeeming qualities about it. And PB originally planned a book 2 for it, so it's really a shame that literally no one else advocates for this one to get its book 2 back (because unlike ROD it actually needs that sequel)

HSS:CA isn't terrible. It's a major downgrade from the OG HSS and has zero connection to the previous source material, yes. But it's far from being one of the worst. It does have its share of redeeming qualities and good ideas, putting it more in the "wasted potential" category.

Ajay isn't a bad LI. I did hate his behavior about the sabotage and framing in book 1 but I honestly feel like that's less a problem with the character and more a problem with lazy writing.

Michael's still a great LI but he felt sidelined in book 2.

TCH is the only toxic LI story that I think is done well in any way. Granted I still hate them making Kieran abusive but besides that I do think the story is pretty straight-forward and I did like the development of Kieran and MC's relationship.

A lot of the stuff people call "gender coding" is stuff that is actually just lazy coding in general. Eg. stuff like MC being the one to walk down the aisle regardless of gender in AME. That's general lazy coding because PB should be giving all their players options for who walks down the aisle, both in genderlocked and GOC books.

MCs that are blank slates and let you choose their personality are generally better than MCs with super pre-set personalities and backstories. I like being able to construct who my character is through headcanons and in-game choices. If I wanted to read pre-set main characters I'd just go read regular books lol.

The flower tux for m!MC in AME is fine. Like it's really not as bad as people have made it out to be.

Some of y'all get way too fixated on certain sprites "looking too old" or "looking too young". There are some people who "look younger" or "look older" than they're supposed to be. I get if the look is still off-putting to you that's fine but when people specifically talk about "looking too young/old" it kinda comes off as icky to me?

BaBu isn't that bad. Even as someone who hates the idea of becoming pregnant, I ended up finding it a mostly decent book. It's far from the best, but it's definitely not the worst.

Do people have any unpopular opinions on anything related to the Choices books that they would feel comfortable sharing? I'm kinda bored and it would be fun to read some hot takes imao

[mortallyclearwonderland]

Is Rise of the Guardians 2 possible? Yes!

Let's list all the facts supporting the possibility of another movie:

1. The director of the first movie is open to the idea of creating a sequel. "I'd love to be involved in something like that again, just because there are so many things I'd like to improve on from the first time because of inexperience or the circumstances that we didn't get to do.’’ (2020) The director? Peter Ramsey, the guy behind Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse!

2. Speaking of Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, Dreamworks started to experiment with 2D and 3D. Their newest movies The Bad Guys and Puss in Boots the Last Wish are huge critical and box office successes.

The Bad Guys earned $250.5 million from the $69–80 million budget. Puss in Boots the Last Wish earned $263.6 million and still counting from the $90 million budget.

3. When we're on the topic, Rise of the Guardians wasn't a flop but it didn't make as much money as Dreamworks anticipated. The movie cost $145 million to make and made $306.9 million at the box office. With the new art style being cheaper to make but not dropping in quality future films will make much more money. And that's how it should be. Not getting more expensive and looking like an early 2000s CGI video game, Disney! 

4. Dreamworks has no problem with making sequels even when there is a big gap between the last release. They announced Kung Fu Panda 4 for the 2024 release meanwhile Kung Fu Panda 3 came out in 2016. That's an 8-year wait while the original trilogy had about two 4-year gaps between installments. Between the original Puss in Boots and its sequel passed almost 12 years. Puss in Boots 2 also foreshadowed a potential sequel to the Shrek franchise for which the last movie was Shrek Forever After in 2010. The Croods came out in 2013, and its sequel The Croods: New Age came out in 2020. Again with huge positive critical and box office reception. $216 million from a $65 million budget. Dreamworks is the master of sequels!

5. Furry bait! People at Dreamworks have a connection to the internet. They know people went wild over Mr. Wolf and Death. Bunnymund voiced by Hugh Jackman? Come on, people will go crazy! 

6. Great villain potential! Everybody is praising Death for how scary he is. People love tragic and complex villains like Ramses, Tai Lung, and Lord Shen. If Dreamworks leans into Pitch Black's backstory from the books they might create one of their best villains yet! I'm not going to spoil it.

7. Jude Law, VA of Pitch Black, will be in the Star Wars Skeleton crew and Pan and Wendy. Whether or not those projects will be good in their own right people will know him from those roles and might want to watch an animated movie just because he's in it.

8. Dreamworks wants to please its audience. Unlike so many creators who destroy franchises out of spite or try to ''fix'' them to their own liking, Dreamworks respects its audience, characters, and lore. I'm sure they know fans want more, but they only make a sequel if they know it will be great.

There is only one huge problem. Alec Baldwin, the voice actor for Santa, killed someone. In October 2021 on the set of “Rust”, a Western being filmed, Baldwin pulled the trigger with a live round, killing the film's cinematographer, Halyna Hutchins. I'm not going to get into detail. Find it on your own accord, there are plenty of people already cowering it better than I could.

The solution is easy, just cast a new voice actor.  

It looks to me that practically everything is in perfect configuration for the Rise of the Guardians 2.

It also looks like Dreamworks has a new strategy. Release an original movie and then a sequel to the franchise, another original, and another sequel.

[mypoisonedvine]

𝐩𝐨𝐨𝐥𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐞 || helmut zemo, bucky barnes and sam wilson x reader

(this is a sequel to 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭-𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐞, I recommend reading that first although it’s not 100% necessary... it would make this make a lot more sense though)

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 : it was just a matter of time before he upped the ante, all four of you knew that, but taking you all on a vacation specifically for this was a bit over-the-top.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 : 7.9k (hoo boy)

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : smut (foursome/group sex + a scene that’s just zemo/reader, cockwarming, d/s dynamics, brief oral f receiving, a touch of dubcon/cnc but it’s very subtle and the reader is 100% consenting), established zemo x reader, sugar daddy relationship, ‘sir’ kink (with zemo), ‘daddy’ kink (with sam), orgasm control/denial, overstimulation, creampie, praise with light degradation, possessiveness (but also sharing, lol), exhibitionism/voyeurism, choking, brief anal mention, once again technically cuckolding but not in the typical sense, slight corruption kink?, too many robes, latin sokovian (or as I like to call it, serbukromanian), also assume that whenever the reader and zemo are alone they are speaking sokovian even though I write the convos in english for the sake of simplicity

thank you for being my beta @nsfwsebbie​ !!

                   When your Baron told you he wanted to take you on a vacation, you immediately assumed it would be to the mountains or some European city full of history and culture.  Instead, you were a bit surprised to hear he was interested in a beach resort, a private villa he had purchased in French Polynesia.

And then you found out he wanted to bring Sam and Bucky along too… and you were simultaneously more and less surprised.  More, because who brings tentative coworkers one barely gets along with on a romantic vacation?  Less, because of course he would do this.  Of course he had plans to dress you up in the tiniest bikinis he could find and show you off to the men who had already become pawns in his perverted game of social chess.

Not that you minded; you were the Queen of the board and it didn’t bother you if it was what the King wanted.

~

You spent the first night in the villa alone with him, which you appreciated.  It had been a while since you two had some real quality time together, and you were craving him more than ever, in every way.

After a beautiful day spent swimming in the crystal blue ocean and enjoying the sights your new temporary home had to offer, you took a shower and tried not to get too excited about how you might be spending the evening with him.  But, of course, you were only a few minutes into washing the saltwater off your body when you began to imagine his tongue on you, god that man could use his tongue to destroy you any way he wanted: with his words, with his kisses, or perhaps best of all with it tasting every inch of your cunt.  It was amazing how he could get on his knees for you and still have all the power.  He liked to make you keep eye contact with him while he did it, make you beg him to let you come, whatever it took to remind you that you were thoroughly and properly owned.

And you loved every second of it, you loved being helpless to him.  He made you feel so safe that being vulnerable with him by now felt like no risk at all.  You could remember early on when your fears and insecurities made you more hesitant to submit to him, and it was only with gentle patience that he coaxed you into it, never pressure or anger.  You weren’t a virgin when you met him but, sometimes it felt like you might as well have been since you were so inexperienced and undersexed then.  In fact, he was the first man, the first person other than yourself to make you come… and he made you come more ways than you had known possible.

Okay, so maybe the plan to not get your hopes up wasn’t going so well… you were already struggling to keep your hands from between your legs. Frankly, you would’ve already done it if you didn’t know that touching yourself was against the rules.

You’d gotten so used to taking care of yourself while he was in prison, at which point he obviously suspended that rule, and it was a hard habit to break at times.

You emerged from the bathroom in the fluffy robe you found on the door, smiling when you saw him lounging on the bed in a matching one, reading Анна Каренина (known by the West as Anna Karenina).  He looked contemplative, as always, and you always thought he looked especially sexy in his reading glasses.  You slipped into the bed beside him, resting your head on his chest as he found a position where he could read comfortably with his arm around your shoulders.

“You must’ve already read that book a thousand times, Helmut,” you sighed.

“And it gets better every time,” he mumbled back, turning the page.

You pouted slightly, nuzzling into his shoulder, and he chuckled.  “Is my little lutka in need of some attention?”

You nodded, and he kissed the top of your head softly.  

“Why don’t you keep me warm while I finish this chapter, hm?” he offered, and you involuntarily clenched your thighs together at his words.  He phrased it like a question, but it felt more like a gentle demand, and you were happy to agree either way.

“Yes, sir,” you hummed as you sat up and straddled his legs, undoing your robe and opening his to wrap your hand around his half-hard cock.

He reached his full potential with only a few slow strokes, and you found yourself absent-mindedly licking your lips as you saw the way your fingers just barely met with your thumb and imagined how your body would be pushed to its limits to take him.  Good thing you were already dripping wet even though you’d just been in the shower.

You indulged in rubbing your pussy over his shaft for a moment, enough to coat him in your wetness, before you lined up his tip to your entrance and sunk down onto him with a sigh, feeling like you could never tire of being stretched open by his thick cock.  

When your hips met his, and the tip of his cock brushed against the deepest parts of you, you had to bite your lip to suppress a whimper.  After so long apart, you were still readjusting to taking him and being on top didn’t make it much easier.

Honestly, you really weren’t trying to move; you just found your hips rocking slightly, seemingly of their own accord.  You moaned under your breath as your clit rubbed against his body, but you were pulled from your trance with a whine as he slapped your thigh.

“No moving, draga, I think I made myself clear,” he reminded you sternly.

“Yes, sir,” you breathed.

You were pretty sure that at some point, you were a patient person. But you couldn’t imagine that now, not when all you could think about was how amazing it would be to just ride him right there, memories running through your mind and making your inner walls ripple unintentionally.  He either couldn’t feel it or didn’t care, stoically continuing to read even as you were struggling to stay still.

Your plan was to be good for a while and then hope that you could convince him later… but you know what they say about best-laid plans, so you ended up cutting straight to the convincing pretty fast.

“Can I move yet, sir?”

“It’s hardly been a minute,” he frowned.

“Please,” you sighed, just barely moving your hips without even meaning to.

“Not yet,” he asserted, sounding a bit annoyed, but you needed this more than anything.

"Please let me move, please; I just wanna ride you so bad,” you begged.

He sighed, clearly irritated, and just when you thought you’d made a grave error, he finally put his book aside and looked up at you with a grin.  "If I had known you would be so whiny, I would have had you keep me warm with your mouth.”

You opened your mouth to respond but let out only whimpery moans when he ran his hands up your body, toying briefly with your nipples before wrapping a hand around your neck and pulling you down into a rough kiss.  Moaning into it, you couldn’t hold back any longer and started to rock your body atop his, savoring that perfect drag of his length along your walls that you’d missed so much.

Before you got a chance to really set your pace, he grabbed you tight and rolled the both of you over, pinning you under his weight as he fucked you in that way that was somehow rough and slow at the same time, moving his kiss to your neck and holding you down by your wrists.

“Fuck, th-thank you, sir,” you sighed, your cheeks warming when he chuckled against your skin.

“You really are too sweet, draga,” he whispered.

Your arms wrapped around his neck while your legs did the same to his hips, keeping him deep inside you while his lips and tongue teased your collarbones, his fingers interlacing with yours.

He spent the entire night somewhere between making love to you and fucking you within an inch of your life, making you come more times than you could count, only taking breaks from fucking you to eat you out like a starving man (and one time for a quick drink sometime around 3 a.m.).  It was no wonder, then, that you passed out just a few moments after he finally came inside you, sleeping soundly in his arms until well into the morning, nearly noon in fact, when the sun was streaming in through the massive window.

After a relaxed breakfast of champagne and fruit (the native pamplemousse was unlike anything you’d ever eaten before), Helmut encouraged you to shower again and meet him at the pool, which was a bit surprising since he normally liked to have you keep his come in you as long as possible.  “Our guests should be here this afternoon,” was his only explanation, and you had a few ideas about what that meant, all of which made your gut sink in an oddly pleasurable way as you were filled with anticipation.

“Wear that bathing suit I bought for you, the new one,” he added finally as he stepped out onto the back patio.

~

It might seem silly to have a pool on a property right by the beach, but on days like today, where the ocean water was just a bit too chilly, you were thankful to have the heated pool to take a dip in.  Honestly, you were a little surprised that Helmut didn’t make you swim in the ocean to see your nipples get hard through the tight black bikini, but then again, they were already getting there just from sharing a pool chair with him.

He was lying against the cushioned chair; your body sat between his spread legs as the back of your head rested on his chest.  And, this is entirely unrelated, but you really liked how he looked in the round sunglasses he had on.

You hummed contentedly as you reached up behind you to touch him, rubbing his shoulders and pecs.  You wiggled a bit, slowly, and imagined how it would feel if he got hard right against the small of your back.

"Mm, what's gotten into you, lutka?" he purred, rubbing your arms.

You rolled your eyes playfully.  "You know the effect you have on me, don't act surprised."

Just before anything exciting could happen, Sam and James entered through the fence, apparently already having changed into their swimsuits; you wished you had thought to wear sunglasses so they couldn’t catch you ogling their muscular bodies, but instead, you just tried to keep your cool as you waved hello.

“Welcome!” Helmut called out, both of you getting up to greet them properly.  “I hope your flight was alright…?”

“Yeah, it was great,” Sam nodded, “thanks.”

“You really own this whole place?” James added, glancing around.

“Yes, would you like to have a swim?  I hear it should be warm enough tomorrow for the ocean, but until then…” Helmut trailed off.

Sam went right ahead, diving in and smiling wide when he popped back up.  That man had such an infectious smile, you thought he should charge people to see it or something because you felt spoiled seeing it for free.

James jumped in behind him but seemed a little surprised when he returned to the surface to see you back in your chair with Helmut.  “Care to join us?” he asked you.

“Um, no, I already swam a bit this morning,” you remembered, suddenly shy, “I think I’ll stay by the pool a while longer.”

“Aw, I was looking forward to getting to know you better,” he pouted, and everyone else raised an eyebrow at that statement.  “Um, verbally, I mean,” he added, cheeks flushing slightly.

“What would you want to know?” you asked, sighing as you relaxed against Helmut’s chest.

“Well, what’s your story?” he shrugged, swimming up the edge of the pool to hang his arms over the edge.

“I… suppose it’s a rather short story,” you realized, “I was born in Sokovia, but my parents were immigrants.  I was a bit of an ugly duckling as a child, I think.”

“You look like quite the swan now,” James winked, and you hoped Helmut wouldn’t notice how much that affected you.  

“Oh, thank you,” you mumbled.

“Which reminds me, that’s a cute bikini you have on,” he complimented.

“Do you like it?” you hummed coyly.  “Helmut picked it out.”

“Why don’t you give them a better look, darling?” Helmut prompted, and Sam swam up to hang over the edge too as you stood up and fought the urge to cover yourself with your arms.  The Baron motioned his finger in a circle, silently instructing you to twirl so they could see the back, and you did though you felt a bit self-conscious about it.  Finally, once you were sure they’d had an eyeful, he let you sit back down in his lap.

“Cute, isn’t it?” he cooed as his fingers travelled slowly up your sides.  “It’s Chanel.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Sam dismissed, unlatching himself from the edge of the pool and falling into a backstroke.  “This is weird.  I just wanna swim.”

“You didn’t think this was seriously a free vacation, no strings attached, did you?” James shot back, getting up out of the pool and shaking some of the water off of himself before sitting down in the chair beside you two and letting his eyes wander over you.  “So, Chanel, huh?” he prompted, and you nodded.

“Helmut says I should only wear the nicest things,” you explained, sitting up slightly.

“Why does it matter?  You’d look beautiful in anything,” James cooed, and you felt a little dirty for how much you liked his attention.  Good thing you liked feeling dirty.

“And a rare wagyu steak would taste just as good served any way, but you wouldn’t put it on a paper plate, now would you?” Helmut countered.  “Well, maybe you would…”

James rolled his eyes but brushed off Helmut’s insult, returning his attention to you.  “I guess I’m just… hungry enough that it doesn’t make much of a difference.”

You reached up to trace your fingertip over the silver chain dangling off of his neck, biting your lip as you hooked your finger around it and pulled him closer.  “Are you hungry enough that you don’t mind that it’s another man’s meal?”

His blue eyes went wide for a moment before glancing down to your lips and back up to your unwavering gaze, your brow raised as if a challenge while his furrowed as if he were considering accepting it.

“If he’s willing to share…” James whispered back.

“Then kiss me,” you requested softly, pulling him closer by his dog tags one more time until your lips met.

The way James kissed you was… difficult to describe.  Gentle, but with this edge of intensity— like he was restraining himself, like there was so much more passion teeming beneath the surface.  You wanted to bring that out if you could; you wanted to see how far you could push him until he lost it.

As James carefully ventured his tongue into your mouth, only to pull back and nip your bottom lip with his teeth, Helmut kissed you too— on the back of your neck, that spot that always made you wet and desperate right away.  You moaned, and you couldn’t be sure exactly who it was for, but James sure decided to respond to it either way, tilting his head more to let his kiss explore you deeper.

Helmut’s teeth dug into your shoulder right as James nipped at your bottom lip like they had somehow explicitly coordinated to make you desperate; your right hand reached up to weave into James’ hair, your left squeezing Helmut’s wrist at your side.

The kiss ended just a moment too soon, and there was a delay before you blinked your eyes open to look back at James, who seemed quite proud of himself.

“Touch me,” you pleaded in a whimper.

“Where?” he asked, somewhat innocently.

“Y-you know where…” you mumbled.  

He grinned wide, all trance of innocence gone.  “I know, but I want you to say it.”

“My cunt,” you whispered, and he snarled just a bit at the word.  “Please?”

“Of course, which one do you want?” James prompted with a grin, showing you his hands as your eyes instantly gravitated to the metal one.

“I think you know which I’m going to choose,” you mumbled shyly, and he smirked as he reached forward with the vibranium arm to brush his fingertips over your stomach, moving down to the top hemline of your bikini bottom.

You just barely gasped when the metal digits swiped over your clit and began to rub gentle circles, almost too slow as if he wanted to tease you… which, of course, he did.

"Do you like the way he touches you, draga?" Helmut whispered.  His voice in your ear was like honey on your tongue, like honey everywhere.

"Yes, sir," you nodded, looking down at James' hand buried into your bikini.

"Hey, tell me you like it, too," James protested, "I'm the one doing it after all."

"I like it, James," you repeated, looking up at him.  "I… don't have a title for you.  Should I call you something when you touch me like this?"

"You can just call me Bucky from now on, okay?  I think we're well past close enough now for that."

"Okay, Bucky," you sighed, watching the way his jaw clenched when you called him by name, "please put your fingers inside me."

"Both?"

"Yes, please," you breathed.

"But my fingers are thick, they're hard metal, and you're so small and delicate…"

"I want them to stretch me out, just please—"

A loud moan of shock jumped out of your mouth when he pushed the fingers in all at once, and though it reawakened some of the soreness from when Helmut had fucked you the night before, it felt wonderful enough to make your back arch up from the strong body behind you, his erection now digging into your hip.

It was certainly loud enough to get Sam's attention, who suddenly appeared beside the chair while he towelled off his chiselled chest.

"Damn, what are y'all doing to her over here?" he wondered aloud as if he were concerned for your health.

"Just playing with Zemo's little doll," Bucky answered.  "She's really fucking tight, can barely fit two fingers."

"Wait, move over, let me see," Sam insisted, making Bucky pull his fingers out and Helmut holding you more firmly as Sam slipped his hand into your bikini as well, poking his fingers at your entrance before pushing them in.

His fingers were even thicker and longer than Bucky's, just by a slight margin yet enough to make you mewl and arch your back as your eyes fluttered shut.

"Fuck, yeah, you were right," Sam breathed, and you felt more hands running over your body but you couldn't even tell anymore whose they were; you knew one that reached to pull up your bikini top and expose your breasts was Helmut's, because only he would be so bold, but the fingers teasing your nipples, the rough palm running up your legs… they could've belonged to anyone, and that realization made your clit throb.

"Okay, okay, that's enough. I was here first," Bucky mumbled as you felt Sam's fingers slip out and the metal ones push back in— not to mention the thumb reaching up to circle your clit slowly.

He wasn't just exploring you this time; you could tell he had a mission.  The way he instantly curled into your spot, the way he moved quickly yet deliberately, all made your thighs begin to quiver.

Helmut kissed your ear, gently tilting your head to access your neck better where he began to suck hard enough to leave a mark, mumbling something in Sokovian about how good you were being for him and his guests.

You loved being good, and the praise made your hips lift a little so you could rock yourself onto Bucky's fingers; the three men chuckled proudly.

"Feels that good?" Bucky pressed, and you nodded quickly.

He fingered you even faster, harder, and you cried out.

"Ohhh fuck, Bucky!" you gasped.  "Bucky, I'm gonna come!"

"Oh no, you're not," Helmut groaned, giving you a quick spank on the inner thigh as you whined and jolted.  "James, take your fingers out."

"Do I have to?"

"You do if you want a chance to fill her with more than just your fingers…"

That worked right away, Bucky pulling back as you pouted at being empty again.

“Let’s take her inside, and we can continue this there,” Helmut suggested, and Bucky lifted you up into his arms as the Baron led the group back to the master suite.

The convenient thing about bathing suits is that it takes so little time to get naked, which is why the second the patio door was shut, Bucky and Sam were stripping as their hard cocks bobbed up against their stomachs.  As if that weren’t overwhelming enough, Helmut stepped away for a moment (which left you feeling more alone than usual) just as the men began to help you strip; Sam untied the back of your bikini while Bucky knelt and pulled down the bottoms, leaving you feeling exposed as you were totally bare before them.  Bucky smiled up at you and kissed along your thighs while Sam grabbed a handful of your ass and growled a bit under his breath.

When you looked over at Helmut, you saw he had actually dressed in his robe rather than stripping, nearly making you whine with disappointment.  But you couldn’t focus on that long as hands moved all over your skin, both of them still just slightly wet from the pool, and you shivered for both of those reasons.

You gasped when Bucky suddenly licked a thick stripe right over your folds, and if it weren’t for Sam’s arms holding you up, you might not have been able to stay standing.

Looking down at where Bucky was devouring you, he looked back up at you with a lot less dominating intensity in his eyes than you were used to seeing.  Not that you minded; after all, no one could do what Helmut did as well as he could, but maybe Bucky could do something different, and it would be just as enjoyable.  His tongue lapping at your clit was certainly wonderful so far.

Sam guided one of your hands back behind you to stroke his cock, your mouth falling slack, which he took advantage of by turning your face and capturing you in an open-mouthed kiss.  You heard your moans stifle against his tongue, felt his cock flex a bit as you smeared the precum you found at his tip.

“I think that’s enough for now,” Helmut interrupted, and everyone turned to look at him.  “Darling, come here,” he instructed with a curled finger that pointed to the bed, “hands and knees.”

You nodded and pushed the other men away, taking your place on the bed and looking up at him as he held your jaw gently.

"How long has it been since you had another man inside you, lutka?" he asked lowly.

"I can't even remember,” you admitted, “it's been so long…"

“Are you willing to try it?” he asked gently, no hint of domination or pressure in his tone, and you found yourself searching his eyes for the right answer.

“What do you want?” you asked him instead of answering.

“Draga, I’m asking what you want,” he reminded you, but you were afraid he would be hurt if you showed interest in the other men.  Sure, previous evidence indicated that wasn’t an issue for him, but your gut instinct was to deny your attraction.  So, you compromised. 

“All I want is you,” you answered first, “but…”

“But?”

“But is it awful if… if I want them to fuck me, too?”

He smiled, kissing your forehead.  “No, I don’t think so.  Only as awful as it is that I want to watch them fuck you.”

You looked up at him and smiled back, brimming with gratitude that he was so gentle with you.  It was fascinating how he wielded complete control over you and yet never used it against you.

“I have one rule, draga,” he added firmly, “you cannot come for them.  You only come for me.  Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir.”

“And stay on your hands and knees, so I can always get a good look at you, yes?”

“Yes, sir.”

He kissed you one more time before pulling away and sitting back in the chair in the corner with his ankle over his knee, looking at Sam and Bucky expectantly.  Every chair he sat in seemed to look like a throne as soon as he was in it.

“Well, get on with it, then,” he instructed, motioning to you.  The men looked at you and looked at each other before some kind of silent agreement took place and Bucky stepped up first.  Sam sat down to watch you as you felt Bucky stand near the bed behind you, flesh and metal fingers running over your back until you shivered.

Then he pressed his cock against you, coating himself in your wetness, and that made you shiver, too.

You braced yourself as he lined himself up, whimpering slightly as he pushed his cock into you as well as hearing him moan lowly.  The hand at your waist tightened as he hissed in a breath through his teeth.

"Fuck," he breathed, holding you still so he could fill you completely.  “S’tight…” he slurred.

“How does it feel for you?” Helmut asked you, raising an eyebrow as he examined your expression, your mouth fallen slack, yet your brow furrowed.

“It feels… different,” you stammered your answer.  You gasped loudly as Bucky started to move, and yes, this was very different.  His cock was curved differently and though it didn’t exactly reach any new parts of you (you were sure Helmut had already touched every part of you physically accessible), it did stroke them in new ways.  

He gained speed rather quickly, clearly too on edge himself to stay patient, and you didn’t blame him although it sent you moving faster toward the edge than you would’ve liked.  At first you wondered if it would even be a challenge to keep from coming like Helmut had demanded… you chided yourself internally for ever being so hubristic.

His legs pushed yours apart, spreading them wider, and he began to really fuck you in earnest, fast and needy and each slam of his hips against your ass harder than ever.  “O-oh fuck,” you choked, forcing your eyes shut and scrunching up your nose for a second when he slammed the tip of his cock right into the deepest spots inside you.  This position left you with nowhere to go, put your whole body on display for him along with giving you no escape from his onslaught of pleasure.  Worst of all was that you were pretty sure he wasn’t even trying that hard to make you feel good, and yet feeling used like that only turned you on more.

"Bucky, please, slow down," you whimpered.

"Absolutely do not do that," Helmut interjected sternly.  "Don't let her tell you what to do."

And, possibly just to spite you, he actually fucked you faster.  You sobbed and bit down on your lip, fighting everything building up inside you.

“You’d better not come,” Helmut warned through his teeth, “you’d better not fucking come.  You know how bad it would be for you if you came for another man.”

“Y-yes, sir,” you nodded.

But Bucky was slamming right into your spot, and he knew it, too. He knew how desperate you were becoming, and apparently, he didn’t mind at all that you’d be punished for it.  He leaned down to growl against your ear, “I know how close you are.  Don’t you think it’d feel so good to just let go and come on my cock?”

You shook your head, tears streaming down your cheeks as the force it took to hold back your orgasm became painful.  “No, it would only feel good to come for Helmut…”

“C’mon baby, just stop fighting it and come for me,” Bucky taunted, “squeeze me tight with that sweet little pussy; I know you need to so bad.”

He wasn’t wrong, but you blinked with teary eyes up at Helmut and wanted nothing more than to please him and make him proud of you.  “Please, m-make him stop,” you begged, “I won’t be able to hold back anymore…”

“He’s not going to stop until he comes, lutka, and you need to stay strong,” he explained, his voice soothing you slightly.  “You need to be my good girl.  Can you do that?”

“Yes, sir,” you whispered.

Bucky held your hips tight as he pulled your body back onto his cock, and you forced your eyes shut to try to focus on not coming.  No other man had made you come in your life but Helmut, and you had no intentions of breaking that streak.

“Think you can make me come before I make you come?” Bucky challenged.

“I have to,” you answered breathlessly.  “And I want you to come… I wanna make you come so bad, Bucky, please…”

“Mhmm?” he encouraged.

“Please, I want it, please come for me,” you whimpered.

“Fuck, I will,” he promised darkly, fucking you even harder.

Helmut interjected a brief instruction: “Pull out.” 

Bucky nodded a little, breathing heavily as you felt his cock throb slightly, especially at the base where each movement stretched you out even more.  It was so beautifully erotic and you were tensing every muscle inside you to try not to come, which helped speed him up quite a bit since you were gripping him so tight.

“Fuck,” Bucky grunted, “fuck!” 

He pulled out and instantly painted your back with a roar, sliding his cock over your ass as he pumped stream after stream of come onto you.  You sighed happily, satisfied that you had managed to stave off orgasm with perhaps only a few seconds to spare— you’d never been so happy to make someone come before because this time it brought relief that you had done well for your Baron.

Then again, you always felt that way when you made the man himself come, but this was different because you had been moments away from failing him.

Speaking of the Baron, he stared down at you proudly the whole time, kneeling down slightly to swipe his finger through the cooling spend on your back and bring it to your open lips.  “Mm, you really are my perfect little girl,” he mumbled as you sucked his finger diligently.  But he turned his attention away from you to call out across the room, “Sam!  It’s your turn.”

Your eyes went wide.  “W-wait, Helmut, I’ll come!”

“No, you won’t,” he hissed, eyes darkening again, “because I told you not to.”

And Sam was already behind you, taking Bucky’s place who had already cleaned himself up a bit and returned to his seat, letting the Baron pour him a drink which he gulped down in one go.

When Sam pushed into the end of you, your natural instinct was to arch your back up to try to keep him from going too deep, but he growled and pushed your back down again with a strong hand that made you feel so small for a moment.  “No, baby, no running away… you’re gonna take it all.”

“Yes, daddy,” you breathed, yelping a little when he roughly shoved in that last inch.

From then on, he went much harder on you than Bucky had, spanking you and gripping your ass while he fucked you, and the most embarrassing part was how much harder it made it to keep from coming.  It was clear that he realized making you come would give him power over everyone else in the room for different reasons, and he was determined to gain that power.

“Does he fuck you this good, huh?” he groaned.  

“He fucks me better,” you shot back right away, making Helmut chuckle slightly.

“If your plan is to make her switch allegiances, you’ll have to do better than that,” Helmut taunted, and Sam doubled his efforts as one hand pinched your clit and the other groped your breast.  You almost lost it right there but managed to pull yourself together, your whole body shaking with the effort to keep the pleasure at bay.

“Well, if he can fuck you better then why doesn’t he?” Sam continued his leading questions, even though you could barely keep up a conversation at this point.  “Why does he keep pimping you out to us if he’s fucking you right all on his own?”

“Don’t you understand?” you breathed, your head falling down onto the bed as you were almost able to look back enough to see his face.  “This is my punishment.  He knows I don’t want anyone else; that’s why you’re here.”

Sam smiled, perhaps in pity, and yet you honestly had to close your eyes because his smile was so lovely that it could’ve brought an end to your restraint.  “Poor thing, he’s really got you whipped.  I… still can’t believe I’m doing this, but you feel too good to stop now.”

He yanked your head back by your hair for emphasis, making you yelp as he fucked you brutally.  Your toes curled and your fingers dug into the sheets, and you had to close your eyes because the way Helmut was staring at you made this all much too difficult.  Maybe it was just that he didn’t seem jealous at all, or angry; but he didn’t seem like he was getting any excess pleasure out of this, either.  It was… almost neutral, but something burned behind his eyes brighter than maybe you’d ever seen it, his legs crossed and his fingers interlaced as he waited for you to either hold or break.

With the top half of your body fallen limply onto the bed, you reached out above your head and felt Helmut’s hand grab yours, squeezing slightly, and it helped keep you grounded as you held his fingers.

“Oh fuck, ‘m gonna come,” Sam groaned out his warning, “gonna cover this pretty ass in my come, you want that?”

“Yes, please,” you shuddered. 

“Keep begging for it,” he demanded, rushing his words as you felt his cock start to throb against your walls with his impending orgasm.  

“Please come, please come, please come on me, Sam, please,” you chanted, over and over, struggling not to come and hoping that if you could speed him up, then you could make it.

He grunted through his teeth as hot ropes of seed covered your ass; though your body was left wanting, dangling on the edge so close to your release, your mind was satisfied that you had managed to follow your Baron’s rules.

Sam stepped back to admire his work, finding another spare robe to cover himself with as he rejoined the other men across the room.

“Would you like a drink as well?” Helmut offered to Sam, unfortunately letting go of your hand in the process.  Sam was still catching his breath, running his hands over his short hair as if he was processing everything.

“No, but are those cigars up for grabs?” Sam replied, pointing to the ornate box propped open, and Helmut nodded.

“Of course; what’s mine is yours,” he answered, presenting the box and lighter to him.

“Yeah, you can say that again,” Sam added flatly, the three of them all looking at where you were sitting, covered in come and waiting patiently for your next command.

Just as you feared they’d all have their cigars and whiskey and ignore you completely, your Baron knelt down to look at you face-to-face, smiling proudly.

“You did so good for me, darling,” he cooed, and your insides clenched as if you could come just from hearing that.  “You don't think I'm horribly cruel, do you?"

"No, sir," you smiled weakly.

“I’ll be right back,” he promised with a kiss to the tip of your nose as he stepped away to the master bathroom.  

You glanced at the other men— Bucky with his crystal glass of whiskey, Sam puffing at the cigar stoically— and wondered what, if anything, you could possibly say.

“So, how’s your weekend been so far?” Sam asked you plainly, breaking the silence.

“It’s only Friday night,” you realized, sighing as you tried not to imagine how much debauchery the Baron had in store for you.  Right now you were so exhausted that it sounded like too much work; and you were so desperate only for Helmut that the idea of anybody else being involved intimidated you.

Helmut returned quickly with a washcloth, sitting beside you on the bed and placing it gently on your back.

“As pretty as you look covered in come, I’d rather not make too much of a mess,” Helmut explained as he wiped you down with the damp cloth, your skin tingling and your body crying out for more of his touch.

“Will you fuck me, sir?” you mumbled, somewhere between an honest question and a desperate plea.

“Yes, I will,” he answered, making you hum happily, “and I’m finally going to let you come.”

You bit down on your lip, trying not to moan just from hearing that.

“But I’m not going to let you stop.”

The lump in your throat was impossible to swallow, but you tried anyway as he tossed the rag away and circled the bed, standing behind where you were laying limply.  He grabbed you by your ankles and pulled you down to where he needed you, covering your body with his as he kissed the back of your neck slowly.

“I bet you’ll come the moment I’m inside you, draga,” he whispered.  You nodded in agreement, gasping a bit as you felt his cock teasing your swollen, sore pussy.  Just the tip bumping into your clit was enough to make you think you could come right there, you’d been on the edge so long.

But then he pushed into you in one stroke, not rough yet enough to reignite the soreness of being filled by two men already, and your walls started to pulse around him.  A million words swirled in your mind, words about how perfect he felt and how you’d missed him so much and how no one could fuck you like he could, but none of them made it to your mouth where you could only moan loudly.

He wrapped his arms around you, he kissed everywhere he could reach, and waves of pleasure washed over you until tears filled your eyes.  You lost count immediately, coming on his cock over and over as you became a limp, whimpering mess right away.

“You two really did miss out,” Helmut taunted the other men between his own moans, “it feels so fucking amazing to be inside her when she comes.  She gets tighter every time… blyat, so tight I can hardly control myself.”

It was already hot to hear him speak to you like that in these moments, but for him to speak to someone else, to keep you from forgetting that you weren’t alone and that these men had just fucked you and were watching you come right now?  You hadn’t even imagined before what that would be like.

“Please, please, sir, please,” you chanted, your voice breaking until you could barely whisper.

“What is it that you want, lutka?  Do you even know what you’re begging for anymore?”

“I want whatever you want, sir, please,” you cried.  He reached around your body to rub your throbbing clit, and you all but screamed.

“I know you do, beautiful, I know,” he breathed, kissing your back and shoulder tenderly to calm you.  “I love you so much, draga, you know that, don’t you?”

“Yes, I love you too, Helmut,” you whispered, “more than anything.  I love being yours.”

“Aw,” you heard Bucky briefly sigh.

“Dude, shut up,” Sam corrected him harshly.

“It’s sweet!” Bucky defended.

“It’s weird; this is all so weird,” Sam frowned.

“You didn’t seem to mind before…” Bucky trailed off.

Two of Helmut’s fingers swiped over your open lips and you immediately sucked them into your mouth with a satisfied hum, the taste of his skin always comforting you.  When he rolled you onto your side, it was so much easier for him to touch you wherever he wanted and it only did more to keep you overwhelmed with pleasure until you worried you couldn’t take much more.  But you kept sucking his fingers, tears still falling which he occasionally kissed away, until he took his hand away to wrap around your neck instead.  You nodded a little to let him know it was okay to choke you, and your loud moans fell to sudden silence when he tightened his grip.  

It made your eyes roll back, it made your walls flutter and your toes start to go numb, it made you wonder if you were going to pass out whether or not he let you breathe again because your body was already ready to give in.

You sucked in a gasp when he let go, sobbing his name as a particularly deep thrust knocked you right into your peak again.  He kept one hand on your neck as the other reached between your legs to play with your abused pussy as he fucked it harder than ever.

“I can’t come anymore,” you assured, shaking your head and trying to push his hand away from your sore clit.  “I— I can’t…”

“Yes, you can, draga, I know you can. Just relax and let me keep making you feel good,” he instructed, somehow both gentle and demanding all at once.

“I… I can’t…” you breathed, nearly incomprehensible between thick sobs, but you were already coming again in spite of your words, shocks of pleasure electrifying your body from the inside out.  He choked you out into silence again, praising you all the way through it.

“There you go, shh, it’s all right,” he soothed, “you’re so beautiful, darling, so good for me, just keep going…”

You reached back to lace your fingers into his hair and tug, which did nothing to deter him from kissing your neck just beneath where his thumb gripped it, same as your hand wrapped tightly around his wrist didn’t stop him from quickly rubbing your clit.

Breath filled your lungs when he let go, and you were so desperate for relief that you felt like you weren’t even in control of your words anymore.

"Please come inside me," you begged mindlessly, "please, I need you so bad, please…"

“Is that what you need?” he groaned.  “You need to be full of my seed?”

“Yes, please, want it deep in me— fuck, Helmut, please!”

He growled and bit your ear lightly, mumbling his promise to fill you up in Sokovian— sometimes you thought he spoke Sokovian when he was about to come because he was so distracted that he forgot English, but you didn’t think that at the moment because you were currently too cockdrunk to think about anything.

His low moan echoed right through your body as you felt his cock flex and throb with each pump of come, just as deep as you’d wanted, and you sighed happily at the familiar feeling, finally relaxing into the mattress.

But perhaps you relaxed a little too soon because he made you come one more time after he’d filled you, whispering something about he wanted to use your pussy to milk every drop from his cock, but after that finally he pulled out, and you collapsed face-down onto the bed, ready to pass out even though the sun was only just beginning to set and you’d slept until noon earlier.

“Well, I think we sufficiently knocked her out,” Sam chuckled.

“‘We’?” Helmut repeated, sounding a bit offended yet bemused as he redressed.

“Okay fine, you did most of the heavy lifting, but only cause you wouldn’t let her come for us,” Sam relented with a frown.

“I swear, I was this close to getting her to break,” Bucky interjected, sighing before taking another slow sip of his (third) drink.

“Yeah, what would’ve happened if one of us made her come, anyway?” Sam wondered aloud.  “She seemed pretty worried about whatever punishment you had in store for her.”

“Nothing too terrible,” Helmut shrugged, “I just would’ve fucked her in the ass.”

Bucky choked on his whiskey as Sam tried and failed to suppress a smirk.

“She lets you do that?!” Bucky blurted out between fits of coughing.

“She lets me do whatever I want,” Helmut replied, “I’m surprised that hasn’t become abundantly clear to you by now.”

“I guess we’re still adjusting to it, that’s all,” Sam explained.  “I don’t know about you,” he looked at Bucky, “but this is new for me.”

“I was born in 1917; everything is new for me,” Bucky frowned.

“Well, this is new for us too,” Helmut assured, “especially her, she was so inexperienced when she met me…”

He paused for a moment to reminisce before glancing at you lying prone on the bed and looked totally fucked-out.

“But look at her now!” he finished.  “She takes it all in stride.”

“Yeah, she’s a trooper alright,” Sam agreed.  “Be careful with her, Zemo, ‘cause I think if you hurt her too bad, Bucky here is gonna be waiting in the wings to steal her.”

“I— what?!” Bucky snorted defensively.

“Don’t think we can’t see you giving her googly eyes, not that I blame you or anything… getting deepthroated for the first time will definitely make you catch feelings,” Sam smirked before taking a puff of the cigar again.

“It’s not like that, I’m just… listen, I guess I’m just a bit more conventional than you perverts,” he frowned.  “I don’t mean to sound ungrateful or anything, I just can’t imagine having a girl like that all to myself and letting anybody else lay a finger on her.”

“Not everyone is as insecure as you, James,” Helmut shrugged.  “Women can’t be stolen.  They can only go where they want to.  And she wants to be with me.”

He turned back to ask you if you agreed, but you were already fast asleep.  Smiling slightly, he grabbed a blanket from the foot of the bed and unfolded it to drape over you; you instinctively cuddled up under it without waking up, letting out a quiet sigh.

“Goodnight, draga,” he whispered with a kiss to your forehead.  “Rest well, you’ll need it for the morning.”

[iidsch]

quick rundown of my main criticisms (many spoilers below):

making a sequel of a game about exploration and not changing the world you have to explore already puts totk on very shaky grounds. yes they added a lot of new content, but hyrule remains the same at large, and as someone who thoroughly scouted every corner of the world, a large chunk of places stopped being interesting, to the point that I didn't even explore some of them.

this means that the new content has to be good to balance the reuse of the map, but i dont think it succeeds at this. the sky islands were very hyped up on the trailers but they ended up being really disappointing, there are too few of them, really scarcely distributed, most of them have the same layout/enemies/resources and the only truly interesting one is great sky island. the depths were a nice surprise, both in terms of aesthetics and gameplay mechanics, but when you realize the map is as big as the surface and that the mechanics and scenery are the exact same throughout the entire area, it becomes incredibly tedious. the few repeated mines and arenas, the one new mini boss, the boss rematches, the yiga quest, and the resources are the only points of interest but that's too little compared with how big the depths are. The caves were a nice addition, one that I actually wanted to see more in botw. I didn't mind that much how small some of them were, although they did get very repetitive; however I take issue with how poorly lit they were, which made navigating them really annoying, and none of the ways to light an area are good enough.

there are way too many things to do in totk and very, very few of them are interesting: 152 shrines, most of which were so simple and easy that they felt insulting; 1000 korok seeds that, although more varied than in botw, are still as repetitive and simple as in botw; 7 minibosses that get repeated ad nauseam until there are 269 of them, and barring the gleeoks, none of them are fun (especially those that appeared in botw); and 139 mini quests so forgettable that the game could exist without them and it wouldn't lose anything important. This is a severe case of quantity over quality and it eclipses the few parts that are good, since most of the time spent in the game will very likely go into finding shrines, getting korok seeds, defeating minibosses, and doing some side quests. It's even more infuriating when you think that the resources put into making so much boring content could have gone into making less but higher-quality content.

the new dungeons are far better than in totk but they still remain worse than the ones in previous games.

i have no idea who thought having the spirits of the sages follow you around was a good idea but i hope they choke on water.

the beauty of the game relies very heavily on its novelty, but once you get used to the scenery, the flaws in the art style become very obvious. the colors are too washed out and dull, the scenery is very repetitive, the world is visually empty and uninteresting except for a few places, and the weather, the bad lighting and this unnecessary but omnipresent layer of dust don't help make the game look nicer in the slightest. elden ring and genshin impact are far, far prettier than both btw and totk combined. even previous zelda games had better graphics despite their limitations.

never before has a zelda game had so much wasted potential when it comes to the story. botw/totk link is the most boring link in the entire franchise, and many characters in the story are very well-written but never get enough screen time to have a fully fleshed character arc or a good conclusion to their stories. the game shies a lot from advancing the main story or giving any new information with regards to the setting - npcs and other characters repeat the same thing over and over again (an example of this is the cutscenes after you defeat each dungeon boss, they are all the same except for mineru's). i also dislike many elements of the worldbuilding that seem to be there just for the sake of having new gameplay but the zelda lore is stupid so it's not that big of a deal

the final phase of ganon was such a letdown in terms of gameplay that it completely destroyed the little excitement i had built during the two previous phases, and I'm utterly dumbfounded by the fact that nintendo made the same mistake as in botw. the spectacle was not worth slowly flying around and then shooting multiple arrows at a target whose attacks don't even hit you.

botw and totk don't meet their scope. if it's a hardware problem, then nintendo either needs to release a new console or make smaller games, otherwise i highly doubt they will ever be able to make a vast open-world game that really fulfills its potential. but if nintendo has the ability to make a masterpiece but doesn't want to then uh. that's really bad.

i can't rate this game because ratings are stupid and the game has bod good and bad things but there's one thing i know for sure and it's that i'm never playing botw or totk ever again

so i finally finished totk and it was bad

[sonicasura]

Top 5 Game Series That Need The N.Sane Treatment

Crash Bandicoot was a series that hadn't been seen for years until the Crash Bandicoot N.Sane Trilogy was revealed to the world. Thanks to this trilogy, not only was the franchise revitalized but we also got a sequel for Crash Warped in the form of Crash 4: It's About Time.

This is a recipe that could potentially bring games lost in obscurity back into the limelight but even a chance for new games to come. Here are some of my picks!

1. Jak and Daxter

One of the games that seriously needs the N.Sane Trilogy treatment. Jak and Daxter was a game series made by Naughty Dog that would inspire many platforms after. It stars the Demolition Duo, Jak and his partner ottsel, Daxter, on incredible adventures that change in tone over each game. You begin with a goofy island adventure to a dark futuristic playground as new mechanics get introduced.

Out of the main trio which consists of Jak, Sly, and Ratchet, Jak was actually the first game I played amongst them. A series that needs a comeback especially with the Easter Eggs often seen in Ratchet and Clank games throughout the years.

Touch up the graphics into a different style depending on the game, the Precursor Legacy be a bit more cartoony in appearance like Crash 4, and then switch to a style similar to the N.Sane Trilogy for the darker games like Jak 2 and 3.

Adjust the controls to run smoother, change difficulty of certain games like lower the difficulty of Jak 2 a smidge and place an optional mode to play with the original difficulty.

This would lay down the groundwork for an actual proper sequel, Jak X feels more like a side game while Lost Frontier is a snore fest.

If Naughty Dog doesn't take this route and continues pushing out flavorless games, I suggest any decent company that can do should buy the rights to Jak and Daxter. This is a gold mine covered in dust that needs to come back!

2. Sly Cooper

Yep! We're going to the other member of this once legendary trio, Sly Cooper. Sly Cooper was the second game series from Sucker Punch that I played, the first being Infamous series.

This game revolves around a group of thieves who steal from criminals and tend to get wrapped up in saving the world a few times or battling enemies out to end the bloodline of the main character, Sly Cooper, who comes from a legendary family of thieves.

Before the series disappeared into discontinuity, we had a total of 3 main games alongside one made by Sanzaru. Sanzaru's Thieves of Time was decent but midway World 3, the quality seriously declined and left fans with a very unsatisfied ending. Perfect for crossovers but terrible for the franchise.

Giving this game the N.Sane Trilogy treatment would not only give a more successful chance than attempts to make a movie, but it could to more proper sequel than Sanzaru's version. Use a design similar to Sanzaru's or go for a more rounded one like N.Sane Trilogy.

Ratchet and Clank Rift Apart even had an Easter Egg with Sly in it too! Insomniac acknowledges that these game series still exist by dropping these little nuggets of nostalgia, take the hint and bring back the Legendary Playstation Trio!

3. Spectrobes

Nintendo's alternate version of Pokemon. Spectrobes is a trilogy game series that debuted on the DS and last game was made for the Wii.

This series revolves around Rallen and Jeena, two members of the Nanairo Patrol, as they search for the fossils of creatures of light known as Spectrobes to find the planet devouring darkness known as Krawl.

You travel through various planets to uncover different kinds of fossils and some very interesting or whacky but loveable characters. It has elements similar to Fossil Fighters where you have to dig up fossils before awakening them. Care for your Spectrobes to battle the Krawl.

The evolving battle system, new mechanics, various locales and the unique design of each Spectrobe were something I loved but pretty sure many would like too. It even had a book and a mini series on YouTube! The game's graphics could take a route similar to Rayman Legends or Dragonball FighterZ.

Don't go for Jump Force please. We need actual expression than stiff faces and aggravating screams.

This is game series worth bringing back even if it just gets a remake.

4. Golden Sun

Another Nintendo franchise that needs return from obscurity. Golden Sun was a JRPG that came along systems like the Gameboy Advance during a severe lack of games for it. It revolves around different groups of people who use Psynergy, their version of alchemy, to battle evil as they travel the realm of Weyward.

A great game series enriched by its many characters, lore, growing battle system such as Djnn and Summons to turn the tide in battles, unique story and all sorts of areas to explore.

The biggest dent to the franchise was Dark Dawn because of its questionable ending that left many players confused or dissatisfied despite the incredible graphics, plot and character interactions. After that no one has heard a single word about any sequel.

The N.Sane Treatment would not only bring the franchise back for fans both new and old but can actually fix the questionable ending for Dark Dawn. Graphic style, um, I guess something similar to Dragon Quest or maybe Persona. Persona would be the better option considering how you choose how the main character responds to certain situations.

This series has been done dirty and deserves a second chance like this.

5. Kid Icarus

A Nintendo franchise that shows bringing back old games can revitalize a lost series.

This game series is at the bottom for a decent reason actually. Masahiro Sakurai has been hearing requests about porting one of the games, Uprising, to the Switch. Something that he sounds like he wants to do but there is a problem as he admits it would be difficult.

How Uprising is made for the 3DS such as the dual screens, and specific use of the touch screen for combat. Something that can't easily be translated to something like the Switch without decent changes.

The game revolves around the angel Pit, who fights the evil forces of the Underworld with assistance from his Goddess Palutena. Each game changes the rules of battle with the greatest being Uprising as you combat various creatures and even bosses revolve mostly around Greek mythology.

I think the N. Sane Trilogy can work with this. The first Kid Icarus and the second Of Myth and Monsters might be what could provide the missing pieces for the Uprising Switch Port Situation.

Both games could be completely restyled in a format that could be similar to Zelda since in these games, your options of weapons are limited and you have to think smart for particular puzzles.

They can be used to lay down a format that can built on for an Uprising Remake since Land Battles are one half of the essential gameplay. The graphics can be Uprising since it's already a perfect that just needs to be brushed up a bit.

When it comes to Super Smash Brothers, Sakurai worked hard to make characters like Minecraft Steve or Fighting Game fighters such as Ryu and Kazuya fit into the gameplay even if it meant changing about every hitbox and aspect of the stages. A little help can go a long way.

That's what I've got for now. If I find anymore games that need the N. Sane Trilogy then I'll put em in a new list. Until next time folks!