#the profanity filled ‘’blue portal’’ headcanon comes from one of Sam’s recent music streams. it was something!

[my-sleepy-head]

Spg automaton swearing headcanons because funny

The Spine: he swears regularly, a specially when frustrated and to emphasize a point in his sentences. He’s however mastered the “I’m innocent! Could a guilty man have such a polite smile?” face and he does try his hardest to hold back in front of children and in public so the Walter Workers don’t reprimand him much… he did however teach Wanda, 4 and Mark how to swear when they were kids because he was mad and 2 and 3. (He also leaned cowboy insults… he uses them quite a bit actually.)

Rabbit: She swears like a sailor in the private of her own home. She’s amazing at holding back in public and tries her best to be a proper lady but at home, a specially hanging out with her Twinpair after a hard day she’s gonna be swearing as he listens and doesn’t judge her. She’s only really said “hell” in front of children that weren’t living at Walter Manor but it’s not that big a deal compared to other things she’s said in private.

Upgrade: she’s more of the kind to not swear for a while and suddenly drop an f-bomb so suddenly no one has time to reprimand her before she’s back to normal. Will also roar more then swear when mad. Sounds like a dragon but she’s still a tiny robot.

The Jon: turns on the profanity filter just to see what comes out of his mouth. He finds it hilarious! He doesn’t really care for swearing though. He does like spelling out swear words with other words to see if the Walter Workers are paying attention though!

Hatchworth: he’s why profanity filers were even installed! His can’t be turned off unless you’ve got the required qualifications and unfortunately for him his favourite Walter Workers doesn’t have the permission to turn it off. He swears worse then Spine and Rabbit combined when he’s not censored and he’s once changed the lyrics to blue portals to have so many f-bombs it’s incredible.

Zer0: he does swear, believe it or not, but it’s so quiet it could be mistaken for him venting steam. He’s picked it up from his two older siblings but know he could get in trouble for swearing. He finds it so much funnier to shout random words when he’s upset anyways! (Like fiddle sticks, Shoot, fudge, ah farts and many other combinations!)

Bonus fanbots + Jenny under the cut

Janet: you’d assume that having worked with the public for like 40 years maybe even 60 years she’d have a pretty mild language. Nope! She’s just good at holding back. She even knows how to swear in cowboy. She just finds it so much more satisfying to drop a “oh, bless your heart.” To someone who’s insulted her instead of saying anything else.

Jenny: also swears like a sailor but she was built cute so she tends to get away with it.

Voltage: if you think he hasn’t gotten in trouble with her father’s extended family for swearing at the kids table think again! He doesn’t even eat, he was complaining about being made to sit at any table as a 20+ year old who can’t eat food!

Judy: has told customers to fuck off. She just doesn’t care, she’s been in the food industry for 70 years and she’s tired. Customers never change and she’s just done. She loves working in the kitchen though, don’t get her wrong, but don’t make her deal with any of the customers or someone better hold her back a little.