#the people I see using skinny with a positive connotation are... not thin

[sassyhazelowl]

I'm very curious when the term 'skinny' started gaining a positive connotation. Traditionally, being called skinny is negative. It means you're unattractively thin with no meat/flesh on your bones. Usually intended as an insult. "You're too skinny, eat more!" or "She's so skinny no curves at all its like a teenage boy." Do people mean slim? Slim means you're attractively thin. Or just... thin. Thin is a relatively neutral term to talk about someone lacking curves. Thin is also the antonym to fat, so if that's the dichotomy you're using, thin is more appropriate.

[glenandbrisketpowellsdogpack]

10 THINGS NOT TO SAY TO SOMEONE WITH AN EATING DISORDER

Having Survived A Combination of 2 Eating Disorders Myself, I Can Vouche For These. I've Heard Them Directly To My Face Myself. My Job At The Time Practically Was A Daily Living Hell Of ED. Thankfully I No Longer Work In Retail And I've Now Been In Recovery For 13 Years.

Do you know someone with an eating disorder or perhaps suspect that someone you know may be struggling? Do you want to help but just don’t know what to do or say? Maybe you notice them skipping meals, picking at their food, exercising obsessively or perhaps tubs of ice cream and boxes of cookies or cereal mysteriously go missing.

Maybe they suddenly eliminate foods and go vegetarian, vegan or keto (whatever the diet de jour may be); or you find them standing over a kitchen counter, polishing off that cake you’d been saving. If any of this sounds familiar, this person is likely struggling with their relationship with food and should seek help if they haven’t already.

Eating disorders are complex mental illnesses that exist on a large spectrum. While there is the “textbook definition” of eating disorders, the reality is, not all eating disorders get formally diagnosed, nor do they all match up perfectly to the criteria which defines the diagnosis. Most eating disorders don’t look like the somewhat glorified versions of ED’s that you see on tv (you know, the starkly thin, young white female). If you don’t work in the field of eating disorders, or haven’t suffered from one yourself, they can be very difficult to recognize or comprehend.

People with eating disorders can’t just “eat normally”, as there is an immense cognitive dissonance occurring. They cannot escape food, because it is necessary for survival, yet it is both their obsession and worst enemy. They are likely acutely preoccupied with their body size, hyper-aware of how their body looks in clothes, their weight, or if people are watching them eat. It can be a very traumatic experience, causing intense physical and emotional distress. It’s not your job to fix them, but you can arm yourself with knowledge and skills to better support them in their recovery.

WHAT NOT TO SAY TO SOMEONE STRUGGLING WITH AN EATING DISORDER:

You aren’t fat! You look so healthy! To the ears of someone with an ED, this does not translate to the well-meaning comment it was likely intended. Healthy to someone with an eating disorder or a distorted body image does not have a positive connotation. The best thing you can do is to not comment on body size at all. Saying, “you aren’t fat” also perpetuates the belief that being fat (using the term fat as a descriptor) is inherently bad and to be avoided. You can’t tell anything about a person’s health just by looking at them, regardless of if they’re in a larger or a smaller body.

You are so skinny! What is your secret? I wish I had your willpower! Okay, this is actually something you shouldn’t say to anyone, period. This can be especially problematic to someone with an active eating disorder or those vulnerable to disordered eating, as it can be the validation their ED is seeking. To them, it says that their efforts are not only working, but that their underlying belief that being in a smaller body makes them more worthy, acceptable and interesting is true. This kind of praise places emphasis on appearance being a source of value, reinforcing the idea that a smaller body is more valuable.

Why is there so much food disappearing from the kitchen?

You may notice that food has been disappearing at an alarming rate. Calling attention to this, and targeting the person likely behind it, is only likely to fill that person with more shame, on top of the internal shame they are already experiencing. Avoid confronting the person about it, as they likely already feel extremely embarrassed and are beating themselves up enough.

Have you taken your meds/seen your therapist lately? 

To the ears of someone with an ED, this sounds like, “You are broken, you are wrong, you need to be fixed.” It’s just as unhelpful as saying something harmful like, “what’s wrong with you? Why aren’t you normal?” So, this is not a helpful comment, and only contributes to shame.

Maybe you should cut out flour/sugar/carbs, or, why don’t you go on a diet? Perhaps the person you know is binging on sugary foods. The root of binging is restriction, so this is their body’s survival mechanism, a biological response to the threat of scarcity and starvation. Suggesting they eliminate the foods they usually binge on will only make them feel guiltier and out of control around food. Not only this, but the person with an ED has likely tried many diets! Dieting is the biggest predictor of an ED, so suggesting more rules and rigidity around food is only going to feed into the disorder, making them even more afraid of food and unable to trust themselves around it. You can’t diet your way to a better body image or relationship with food.

You would look so much better if you just ate a hamburger. 

For someone with an ED, food is the enemy. However, there is so much that lies beneath the surface that makes something as seemingly simple as “eating a cheeseburger” incredibly scary and difficult. Additionally, this perpetuates their belief that what they eat has a direct impact on what their body looks like, which isn’t true.

Why can’t you just eat?

If only it were that simple! More often than not, an ED has very little to do with food itself. They are a mental illness that often have co-morbidities such as body dissatisfaction, low self-esteem, perfectionistic traits, personality disorders, history of trauma, body dysmorphia and more. Boiling it down to eating is reductionist and unhelpful. Oftentimes, professional support and guidance, including a meal plan for structure, is helpful while working toward regulating eating patterns.

Just stop binging!

Binging is not caused by a lack of willpower or self-control. In fact, it is often caused by trying to tightly control eating, leading to feeling restricted and deprived. If you’ve caught them in the middle of it, they are likely deeply ashamed and embarrassed. If you’ve caught them purging, their deepest secret has been revealed and they are probably overcome with shame.

No one chooses to have an eating disorder. It serves some kind of purpose- a crutch, self-soothing technique, a coping strategy. They must develop the tools to cope in other ways, along with normalizing eating, before expecting those behaviors to disappear.

Isn’t that too much food? Do you know how many calories are in that?

First of all, commenting on anyone’s food choices is never a good idea. It’s likely to cause unnecessary food preoccupation and feeling self-conscious about food choices. A person with an ED is likely already hyper-aware of their food choices and feel that others are watching them eat. Commending on their food choices only affirms their fear that their eating is being observed and is on trial.

Just eat like I do and you’ll be fine!

While well-intended, this suggestion is not quite helpful. Someone with an ED is likely already aware that they don’t eat like others, and probably compare their intake and food choices to others on a regular basis. Avoid being their food police, as it is not your job to dictate what/when/how much they eat. They have to go throughout their own recovery process, follow their meal plan, and find it in themselves to work through it.

WHAT TO SAY INSTEAD

Are you okay? I can tell things are tough for you right now, is there anything I can do to support you?

Do you want to talk? I’m here for you if you want to talk.

No one is perfect, go easy on yourself.

Would you like to see someone who can help you through this?

I love you no matter what.

Overall, avoid being the food police, commenting on food choices, and swerve any and all conversation about body size, weight, shape, etc. We are conditioned to share a collective discontent over our bodies, and often bond over lamenting about body size. Do your best to avoid this kind of talk with your loved one, and instead support them, encourage them, and compliment them on things that have nothing to do with their outward appearance.

Blaze

[vavuska]

AUGUST 9, 2020

Body positivity and false myths about health.

Introduction

Today, the revered ideal body consists of a tall, slender physique known as the thin-ideal. This idealized image that has been constructed by the media via magazines, movies and advertising campaigns is having adverse effects on the lives of many women, such that more than half of the women are troubled by certain aspects of their appearance and are not accepting of their bodies as a whole. The preoccupation or obsession with their physical appearance has trapped Western women into subscribing to unhealthy narratives such as "I must be thin to be accepted and loved", "A thin body will make me happy", "Dieting will help me lose weight" or "Thinness equals beauty". These nagging voices often overrun women's lives and are linked to various psychological disturbances such as depression, eating disorders, anxieties, countless addictions, BDD, as well as low self-esteem (Rieves & Cash, 1996), relationship difficulties, and sexual dysfunctions (Dworkin & Kerr, 1987).

In addition to noting that people with perceived obesity (again, not medically diagnosed, just perceived) will experience microaggression, bullying, discrimination in housing, employment, education, and healthcare, Phelan notes that their interactions with healthcare professionals is directly affected by size bias.

In these studies by the Mayo Clinic, primary care physicians reported spending less time with obese patients, less communication, and open belief in stereotypes: this patient is lazy, undisciplined, and less likely to adhere to medical advice.

These negative interactions statistically raise a patient’s chances to: delay cancer screenings and routine care, avoid routine check ups, and are more likely to have unreported diagnostic errors.

This isn’t healthy. This isn’t saving or changing any lives. This is having the opposite effect, and it is happening precisely in the places where we are suppose to be receiving “help.”

What is body positivity?

Body Positivity is a social movement rooted in the belief that all human beings should have a positive body image, in doing so it challenges the ways in which society presents and views the physical body. The movement advocates the acceptance of all bodies no matter the form, size, or appearance.

I personally like the 4 Principles of Body Positivity conceptualized by Body Positivity Activist:

ACCEPTANCE OF WHAT IS: Our bodies as is (healthy, sick, skinny, fat, missing a leg, cancer survivors, and black, white, purple, blue and everything else,) deserve respect, visibility, acceptance and have intrinsic value.

REJECTION OF “BEAUTY” STANDARDS: Body-shaming of all types has been shown to yield detrimental long-term psychological effects such as negative body image, depression, anxiety, and a multitude of eating disorders. It serves no benefits, so we reject it entirely.

ACCEPTANCE OF CHANGE: Changes to our bodies—sickness, ailments, aging, pregnancy, surgery, accidents/trauma, putting on weight, losing weight, ALL of it—should be accepted, and should not diminish the value, respect, visibility of our bodies.

TOTAL INCLUSIVITY: Body positivity is inclusive of all bodies, not just those considered to be “fat” or obese,considering most humans are socialized to have negative perceptions of their bodies.

In short, body positivity and its principles are about acceptance, inclusivity, and respect. First aspect to notice: these are all social ideas, not medical ones. Why naysayers of body positivity consistently bring up the promotion of obesity when fat bodies are displayed is a mystery to me.

The second aspect of its definition one must notice: body positivity does not “promote” any body type. It is simply stating that all body types have intrinsic value. We certainly agree with this as a society. If you intentionally hurt someone’s body--again, regardless of the look, age, or state of that body--we consider that a crime. Body positivity simply concurs with this logic.

Lastly, body positivity by definition does not purport that evolution, change, and/or a healthy lifestyle is unacceptable. You can be body positive and be healthy. In fact, body positivity promotes taking care of yourself.

1 - “Your weight is entirely within your control, you are just being lazy”

As a random guy wrote on Facebook: “Body positivity is appreciating things that are beyond your control, like the colour of your eyes, skin colour, hair texture, height, etc. Weight is entirely within your control...if you eat a lot, you will get fat. Body positivity enables gluttony which is a slap to the face for underprivileged people everywhere in the world.”

That's not entirely true: gaing wight could be caused by hormones (pregnancy, menopause, ecc), genetics (for e.g. Peter Will syndrome) other medical condition linked to endocrines such as Cushing's syndrome or a malfunction of thyroid (hypothyroidism).

The involvement of genetic factors in the development of obesity is estimated to be 40–70%. Some of these obesogenic or leptogenic genes may influence obese individuals response to weight loss or weight management.

To date, more than 400 different genes have been implicated in the causes of overweight or obesity, although only a handful appear to be major players. Genes contribute to the causes of obesity in many ways, by affecting appetite, satiety (the sense of fullness), metabolism, food cravings, body-fat distribution, and the tendency to use eating as a way to cope with stress.

The strength of the genetic influence on weight disorders varies quite a bit from person to person. Research suggests that for some people, genes account for just 25% of the predisposition to be overweight, while for others the genetic influence is as high as 70% to 80%.

Obesity or overweight is not concerned about gluttony. It could depend on a lot of factors: physical and psychological. It is proved that people with depression or anxiety may experience weight gain or weight loss due to their condition or the medications that treat them. Depression and anxiety can both be associated with overeating, poor food choices, and a more sedentary lifestyle. Over time, weight gain may eventually lead to obesity.

Body positivity is about being conformable in our skins. Appreciating what we are and what we have. Body positivity does not promote any form of body, differently of what our media do.

2 — “You cold loose some weight, if you put in some dedication”

This one deleted the previous comment in which he used abused, starving people in Auschwitz to promote a diet, but I have his second one: “I meant that the problem with losing weight is just calories you eat vs calories you burn, of course the amount of calories you burn depend on hormones and a lot of other things. However, everyone can burn more calories by exercising. The Auschwitz prisoners were just an example that it is possible to lose weight, no matter the circumstances, if you REALLY put your mind to it. How you go about increasing the gap between the calories you consume and the ones you burn is up to you. Also, long term, even a 100kcal deficit per day can help you lose weight. You dont have to starve yourself to lose weight.”

Loosing weight is not always a good thing and it is not as easy like those people think.

Muscle does weigh more than fat because it is a denser product. On average, the density of fat is 0.9g/ml. The density of muscle is 1.1 g/ml. Using the averages, 1 liter of muscle weights 1.06 kg or 2.3 lbs., while 1 liter of fat weights .9 kg, or 1.98 lbs. An easier way to think of it might be: if you have an equal volumn of fat and muscle, fat is going to weigh about 80% of what the muscle weighs. This can vary due to numerous factors including race, being extremely lean or being extremely obese according to “Exercise Physiology” by William D. McArdle, et al.

The ‘take away’ points are:

Yes, muscle weighs more than fat. But….. do not assume because you started working out and you are not losing weight it is because you are increasing muscle.

The higher percent muscle you have on your body the smaller your clothing size because muscle takes up less space than fat.

On the other hand, if you are loosing weight, don't presume you are necessarly loosing fat, you could also lost muscles and this is not a good thing.

For that guy, don't eat is the solution to every weight problem. This leads to a thing called anorexia (which is one of the most painful consequences of the idealization of a “perfect body shape” myth portrayed by media). And, again, this guy really thinks that abused starving people are a good example to promote a diet. He seems to doesn't know how work human body and that if you don't eat as much to sustain your body, you will begin to feel always tired, weak and such because your body doesn't have enaugh energy to consume. We will see this in the next point.

3 — “You better have a diet”

I use the word "diet" in this context to refer to any set of restrictive food rules (barring true medical and ethical concerns). If you are feeling guilt and shame about your food choices, it is likely that you are approaching the experience of eating from a "diet mentality."

The word "diet" often has a negative connotation, so many people prefer to say they are making a “lifestyle change.” But if your lifestyle change entails rigid food rules that invoke guilt when broken, you are probably on a diet, even if in disguise. And the truth is, the diet industry wants us to "fail" so that we will continue to purchase their products. When you jump on the latest fad bandwagon, you support a multi-billion dollar industry that profits by convincing us we are inherently flawed.

Diets do not help you maintain weight loss long-term. The idea that people fail at diets because of a lack of willpower is a myth perpetuated by the diet industry. Powerful biological factors essentially ensure that your attempt at dieting will fail. Researcher Traci Mann, who has studied dieting for more than 20 years, found that there are metabolic, hormonal, and neurological changes that contribute to "diet failure."

According to Mann, "When you are dieting, you actually become more likely to notice food. . . But you don't just notice it—it actually begins to look more appetizing and tempting." Mann also stated that as you begin to lose weight, "the hormones that make you feel hungry increase" and "the hormones that help you feel full, or the level of those rather, decreases."

For the average adult in a resting state, the brain consumes about 20 percent of the body’s energy. The brain’s primary function — processing and transmitting information through electrical signals — is very, very expensive in terms of energy use.

The exact percentages are difficult to ascertain, but we have pretty good estimates of where that energy is going, though it varies by the area of the brain. In the cerebral cortex of mice, about a quarter of the brain’s energy goes to maintaining the neurons and glial cells themselves — the processes that all cells go through to remain alive. The remaining 75 percent is used for signaling — sending and processing electrical signals across the brain’s circuits. These numbers seem to be very similar in humans.

The brain is an energy-hungry organ. Despite comprising only 2 percent of the body’s weight, the brain gobbles up more than 20 percent of daily energy intake. Because the brain demands such high amounts of energy, the foods we consume greatly affect brain function, including everything from learning and memory to emotions.

Just like other cells in the body, brain cells use a form of sugar called glucose to fuel cellular activities. This energy comes from the foods we consume daily and is regularly delivered to brain cells (called neurons) through the blood.

As Mann explains, when you diet, "Your metabolism slows down. Your body uses calories in the most efficient way possible... When your body finds a way to run itself on fewer calories there tends to be more left over, and those get stored as fat."

Thus, it is no surprise that studies show that 95 percent of people will "fail" at diets. Most people can lose weight in the short-term; however, over time the majority will regain the weight they lost—and potentially gain even more. Working to suppress your weight below your natural body weight is ultimately a fruitless effort—in fact, it's an utter waste of time.

4 — “Being overweight or obese means being unhealthy”

Studies have found that anywhere from one-third to three-quarters of people classified as obese are metabolically healthy. They show no signs of elevated blood pressure, insulin resistance or high cholesterol. Meanwhile, about a quarter of non-overweight people are what epidemiologists call “the lean unhealthy.” A 2016 study that followed participants for an average of 19 years found that unfit skinny people were twice as likely to get diabetes as fit fat people. Habits, no matter your size, are what really matter. Dozens of indicators, from vegetable consumption to regular exercise to grip strength, provide a better snapshot of someone’s health than looking at them from across a room.

According to an article in The Nutrition Journal by Dr. Linda Bacon and Lucy Aphramor, "Most epidemiological studies find that people who are overweight or moderately obese live at least as long as normal weight people, and often longer."

So, you can be under or normal weight, but that's doesn't make necessarly much more healthy than a overweight people. You can't say that a person is not "healthy" by judging on their physical appearance.

Some feminist points of view

Now, aks yourselves why so many cisgender etherosexual men are so upset from seeing plus size models in media? Do they really care about stranger's women heath?

NOPE!

Oh. Maybe is because they are the ones who lose something in seeing women considered not attractive for their physical appearance being accepted and admired?

YES.

Female beauty standard in media are designed for heterosexual male consumption.

As women gain economic and political power, their beauty should matter less.

Feminist scholars have contended that cultural norms and expectations encourage girls and women to be attentive to and psychologically invested in their physical appearance, which can undermine their well-being and contribute to eating dysregulation, depression, and other psychological difficulties (Cash, Ancis, & Strachan, 1997). Mary Wollstonecraft (1792), who is considered to be the founder of feminism, asserted that women's preoccupation with appearance was due to impoverished education, domestic subjugation, and vain pursuits toward which women were directed by their culture. The feminist perspective reaffirms the declaration that a woman's self-worth, ability, and livelihood are not centred on her physical appearance.

Wayne Dyer (1976/1995) elaborated on this: “many women have accepted the cultural dispatches and behave in ways that they are supposed to when it comes to their bodies. Shave your legs and underarms, deodorize yourself everywhere, perfume your body with foreign odours, sterilize your mouth, make up your eyes, lips, cheeks, pad your bra, spray your genitals with the appropriate bouquet, and falsify your fingernails. The implication is that there is something unpleasant about the natural you, the essentially human you, and only by becoming artificial can you become attractive.”

Peterson et al. (2008) posit that feelings of powerlessness may lead a woman to rely on external evaluations of her body as well as to control her eating behaviours. In contrast, feelings of empowerment may decrease the likelihood that a woman will internalize society's messages regarding attractiveness and hence develop schemas that highlight the importance of appearance. Overall, what is suggested is that feeling empowered in one's life may translate to reduced self-objectification and, in turn, to a decrease in negative evaluations of body image.

As this gross guy said:

“Those women aren't thin they look healthy, your problem with them is that their not grossly obese, I've got news for you, most men don't find grossly obese women attractive. Women decide what they want to look like and that happens to be appealing to men, the media has nothing to do with it, women have been beautifying themselves in order to attract men for millennia.”

Young-Eisendrath (1999) elaborates on the psychological damage done by this: “the belief that we must be thin in order to be successful results in feelings of insecurity about ourselves and our abilities. Obsessive control of the female body leads not to power but to shame, self-consciousness, confusion, illness, even death by eating disorders. Longing to be reassured of our worth and validity, we submit to humiliating advice from experts who tell us what and when to eat, and how to exercise, as if we were children.”

In summary, the obsession with physical appearance often distorts reality, making individuals vulnerable to a host of psychological difficulties, including depression and anxiety, and even abuse (Hooks, 1995). Seeking the ideal body type, which is thinner genetically than 95% of women, is also harmful, as the anxiety it creates about weight is focused upon unnatural thinness rather than health (Williams, 1998).

Body positivity protects women from negative feelings about their bodies: women are encouraged to refute the message of the importance of thinness and develop more empowering self-definitions based on other attributes such as their intelligence or creativity. Feminist ideology thus emphasizes that a woman's self-worth should not be determined by her physical appearance.

This male obsession about our weight, saying that we are not "healthy", is just another way to cotrol our bodies, girls!

Lisa Turner, a food writer and nutrition consultant, summed it up best: “Losing weight is not your life's work, and counting calories is not the call of your soul. You surely are destined for something much greater, much bigger, than shedding 20 pounds or tallying calories. What would happen if, instead of worrying about what you had for breakfast, you focused instead on becoming exquisitely comfortable with who you are as a person?”

Some final conclusions

So telling to every people "you are fat, lazy, ugly and need to exercise for your own health" is not only harmful but not even ever correct for all the reason above.

The person you are insulting online could be “overweight” because has a condition, is highly depressed for past suffering experience (I know girls with past of sexual abuse who used to eat to find comfort for a pain that her cannot express in other ways). Or maybe not. To make it easier for you to understand, you must stop to judge people we don't know on their physical appearance, body shape or weight and we must try to be polite, so you will not get yourselves into embarrassing situations saying stupid things like "oh, sorry... I didn't know you had this thing...", after giving unrequested health suggestion to strangers or insulting them?

Have you ever consider how harm can do on others your “caring about strangers” health? What YOU are doing is causing eating disorders and low self-esteem on others. Body positivity helps to accept ourselves and not to spend our time into stupid considerations about our bodies.

THAT'S WHY WE NEED BODY POSITIVITY!

A little list to summarize:

Don't give unrequested health suggestion: they don't ask and you are not their doctor;

Every person need to be accepted and respected as they are;

Obesity bias adversely affects a person’s likelihood to get help;

Your body works better when you thinking happy thoughts about yourself;

Negative body image DOES promote obesity. And anorexia. And a lot of other bad stuff.

[songketalliance]

You’re Beautiful

“No one has the right to comment on your body and how you would look pretty if you lose weight –except yourself.”

A contribution by Shafiqa Harun

Dearest 15 year old,

You’re beautiful. You know that, right?

“Oh, you’re so fat.”

“Have you tried going on diet?”

“You should eat less.”

“Exercise more.”

I understand, living in Brunei, these negative comments never seem to go away. In fact, you hear these criticisms about your body all the time, at home and especially during family gatherings. Uncles and aunties who only met you once every few occasions feel the need to point out your insecurities and comment on your body and appearance. I mean, come on, of course you have changed – both in mind and body. You are growing up!

You have to realise that we are living in a world that is obsessed with perfection and beauty. We live in a world where we are constantly reminded that an ideal and perfect body shape is to own Victoria’s Secret model-like physiques – thin, flawless skin, perfectly tanned, with toned abs and legs that go on for miles. We are living in a culture that molds and forces us to fit into a narrow standard of beauty. Every day when we scroll through our social media apps, we are bombarded with influencers and brands aimed at making us feel insecure about our bodies, in the hopes to sell products that supposedly will finally make us beautiful.

Yes, you’re not stick thin. You have a round face, curvy body and big hips. You hate seeing yourself in the mirror, and hate it even more when the clothes that you like does not fit you as nicely as on the models or any skinny girls. You feel inadequate and unattractive because you feel that you do not conform into this narrow standard of beauty.

But that’s what makes you beautiful.

All those curves, your dimples, and sassy personality with sarcastic charm, that’s what makes you beautiful.

Showing a bump and outline of your stomach should never make you feel embarrassed. Looking at the cellulite on your thighs in the mirror should never make you feel ashamed. There is no such thing as the perfect body, and that is okay. All body shapes and sizes are beautiful – whether you are skinny, fat or curvy – you are beautiful. There is no wrong with being fat. Technically, the term “fat” is just an adjective that describes a person or animal with excessive flesh in their body. Even in its meaning, there is no evidence that reflect the term “fat” to have such a negative connotation as perceived by the society. I admit, the term itself can be a dangerous, where it can be offensive and often used to hurt people. Somehow, our society needs to realise and overcome the fact that the term “fat” is just a word and an adjective, not a weapon to downgrade others.  

Remember, girl, being fat and/or curvy does not make you less of a person. In reality, it only makes up a small aspect of who you are. You should be proud, and know this, you have no obligation to listen to every suggestion and insult about your body as if your body is theirs to judge and dictate. No one has the right to comment on your body and how you would look pretty if you lose weight –except yourself.

You’re beautiful.

I pray that, one day, you will learn to love yourself first and foremost, and embrace your curves proudly! Self-love can be a long and painful journey where you will question your self-worth in every single step that you take. But I promise you, it is a beautiful journey that will heal and teach you about self-acceptance and confidence. It will not be a lonely journey if you keep surrounding yourself with only positive family and friends.

You don’t need make up to cover your freckles, wear tights to look slimmer and fancy clothes to keep up with the trends to make yourself feel beautiful. Start by loving yourself, and embrace your flaws and insecurities. Positivity will soon become your friend, and when you have doubts, dismiss it quickly by remembering you are beautiful because of who you are – and not what others perceived you to be.

Don’t be afraid of what others might think or even judge you for, because to be honest, they have their own insecurities too, and have no right to dictate your life. Prioritise yourself, learn to ignore those negative and annoying voices in your head (and around you), keep your head high, and just do you.

Let go, Shafiqa. Let go of all the societal expectations that you try to conform. Treat yourself with love and respect, and start embracing those flaws. You will be better, I promise.

Sincerely,

Shafiqa, 25 years old.

A contribution by Shafiqa Harun

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[engl2030018]

Marlyn Burciaga

February 19, 2019

Dr. Mohrman

English 2030-018

All Coke is the same, Drink it.

The 2019 Super Bowl commercial “A Coke is a Coke”[1]is attempting to send the powerful message implying that the world is full of so many different people, things, and perspectives but the truth is that we are all united and have similarities shown in the commercial by not only a mutual love of drinking the same coke but through the deeper meaning of the ad itself. The ad was extremely upbeat and meant to be motivational for its audience. The way that the entire commercial is put together gives it that cheerful tone and was done with a purpose. You hear upbeat music playing behind happy voices saying meaningful things. And the colors they use are very bright, so it goes well with the scenario’s being portrayed. This was all done on purpose; the upbeat music is to let the audience know that this is a positive message. The happy tone in the different voices is so that all populations know that they are included, and the different colored people are to show that your ethnicity doesn’t matter when it comes to the simple things in life, like drinking a coke.

The commercial begins with several different voices reciting lines in detail about the product. “A coke is a coke, is a coke, is a coke”[2]It goes through distinct type of voices in which you can tell if they are female or male, and young or old. During this, it cycles through different types of people doing different types of things and drinking a bottle of coke. Shown straight forwardly, are people of color: blacks, whites, browns, and reds mostly, and they are all different shapes and sizes. They are thin, fit, skinny, fat, big, small, and even a gorilla is thrown in the mix. This being included in the commercial truly gives it a diverse meaning to it. It shows that no matter who you are or what you look like on the outside, we are all actually the same on the inside. Of course, red people don’t exist in real life the way they do in the ad, but this can be translated connotatively by saying that the red people are there to show MORE diversity by stating that really, the only difference humans have is the color of our skin. What we have on the inside of our bodies is never taken into consideration at first impressions or when meeting a person, and the reason for this is only because it is something that you cannot see from the outside; So though the shape, size, and the color of a person’s skin may be distinctive and out of the ordinary, it should not matter.

In the commercial you can easily distinguish rich from poor, and this is so important because it shows that being rich or poor or the amount of money you have does not matter. The same amount of money buys the same tasting bottle of coke. This is referring to an older Andy Warhol commercial: “A coke is a coke and no amount of money can get you a better coke than the one the bum is drinking on the corner of the street.”[3]So, who you are perceived to be is not important, but rather you as a person. Although, at first glance the initial meaning you get from the ad is that what matters is the SAME love for coke that everyone has. But the deeper meaning of it all is that how you carry yourself day by day has a bigger impact in today’s society then what you look like. Completing even the tiniest act of kindness can have the biggest impact on somebody else’s day or even the world. There is a specific part in the commercial that I personally love. The speaker says, “He drinks a coke, and she drinks a coke… even though they disagree.”[4]And it shows a girl drinking a coke that is minding her own business, and the giant gorilla taps her on the shoulder, and she looks as if she is bothered by it. But then he shows her that he has flowers for her along with a coke, and the girl realizes that he is actually trying to be kind. This part of the ad alone has a significant meaning to the message itself. The girl in the commercial that I am talking about is a petite, white, young, stubborn female. She is being portrayed this way because that is the description of a “typical” white woman in our world today. The giant gorilla is representing a black man in today’s world. The usual black man is thought to be big, bulky, and aggressive which, obviously is not the case because he was actually just giving her flowers. And it shows that even though they may disagree, they both drink the same coke, or more connotatively, they still care for one another.

The commercial recites some very powerful messages to try and convince the audience that they know that everyone is different. They address this by saying, “even though the bottles look alike, you aren’t the same as me.” [5]The audience for the super bowl is huge. Obviously, the purpose of any commercial is for advertisement, but Coke wasn’t trying so hard to advertise, it was definitely geared more towards the denotative and connotative messages. This ad had just the perfect combination of seeing the messages as well as hearing them.

Throughout all of “A Coke is a Coke” different examples are portrayed as to why we are all united in one, thanks to coke. The main thing that coke believes and is preaching is that “together is beautiful.” [6]At the end of the commercial you see everyone coming together forming the word “together” while sharing cokes, dancing, and mingling. This shows that even that smallest things, like a bottle of coke keeps us all united in one. The commercial shows all sorts of people and creatures enjoying a coke in various scenarios, A Coke is a Coke cycles through all of these people doing and pursuing different things. There are astronauts, fighters, farmers, chefs, business people, birds, dogs, and the giant gorilla all showing their love for coke. All while the different voices, mentioned before recite lines about the mutual love for the soda and the act of drinking it in general. “Don’t you see?” say the voices at the end of the ad. “Different is beautiful, and together is beautiful too.”[7]Meaning that being different is not a negative thing, it is good to disagree and have differences in the world but being together and united as one is just as good.

When watching this commercial there are several different emotions running through everyone’s bodies. I believe that the message was to hopefully have a positive, motivational impact on its audience and it very well succeeded. It makes you feel as if you belong. Especially if you are a person of color, the ad gives you the feeling of being included and feeling acceptance. The ad really puts those stereotypical implications at rest for white women and black men. “A Coke Is a Coke” asserts that, although the world is full of so many different people, we are all actually united by a mutual love of drinking the same soda. Coke wisely decided to keep the tone relatively light and fun with this commercial, and I do think that it served in their favor.

https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fs2-ssl.dmcdn.net%2FvSKTZ%2Fx1080-QRa.jpg&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.dailymotion.com%2Fvideo%2Fx71n1cq&docid=b3-EHAIseBCQXM&tbnid=x2Frk2r94HcneM%3A&vet=10ahUKEwjX1vrDktDgAhVL5YMKHVDXAqwQMwg7KAIwAg..i&w=1920&h=1080&client=safari&bih=740&biw=1312&q=a%20coke%20is%20a%20coke%202019%20commercial%20&ved=0ahUKEwjX1vrDktDgAhVL5YMKHVDXAqwQMwg7KAIwAg&iact=mrc&uact=8

Citations:

[1]Weiden + Kennedy, A Coke is a Coke, (Coca Cola Ad)

[2]Kennedy, A Coke, Cola Ad

[3]Katie Richards, A Coke is a Coke, (2019 Adweek)

[4]Kennedy, A Coke, Cola Ad

[5]Kennedy, A Coke, Cola Ad

[6]Weiden + Kennedy, A Coke is a Coke, (Coca Cola Ad)

[7]Kennedy, A Coke, Cola Ad

[fiercelyfat]

There is nothing scarier for a woman than the word “Fat”.  The word fat is fighting words, and it’s always thrown at women like a gauntlet.  I know I’m not the only woman who had the words: “Fat bitch” thrown at them in a heated argument.  Fat has some ugly connotations, for a lot of people fat means ugly and unattractive.  If you are fat, surely you never going to get laid and you are destined to grow into a fat old cat lady with zero prospects for a spouse. It’s 2018, and that toxic stereotypical myth is simply untrue.  So I’m here to break down to give my take on the word “Fat” and why we should embrace it.

Why Fiercely Fat?

Fat Bitch T-Shirt by Fat Girl Flow

The word Fat, and by proxy Fatphobia is wrapped into a web of misogyny and sexism and the fear of the other.  However,  Fat is not a bad word. Just like the word “Skinny” or”Thin”, Fat is a just word.  I feel, if you confront the word and it reclaims it, it loses power over you.  This is why I decided to brazenly rename this blog to “Fiercely Fat”.

I know for a lot of people (much like some people in the LGBTQ+ spectrum have problems with the word “Queer”) have traumatic experiences with the word fat and as a result rather not be associated with that word. And that is perfectly fine, everyone has the right to choose their own labels.

With me, I’m different. If you don’t know me, I’m a pretty straightforward person. I don’t like beating around the bush.  And I’m not curvy, I’m not just plus sized—I’m just simply fat.  Fat does not mean all the horrible connations with it, to me it’s just a body type and nothing more.  All women are gorgeous to me skinny, fat, curvy, average, whatever!

So I decided to own my body type and to help other people learn that “Fat” is not a bad word.  This is why I named my blog “Fiercely Fat” because this blog is about teaching fat women how to be Fierce no matter what number it says on their scale.

    Concern Trolls Please Exit Stage Right!

Oh, you probably heard it: “Being fat is unhealthy and you are going to die from a disease.” Yes, I just rolled my eyes, because even after is scientific study after scientific study has come out to say that Fat health is not that cut and dry. The BMI is an antiquated way of determining Obesity,  Diet does not always work,  and there are dozens of ways other than just overeating that leads to being Fat, such as a reaction an effect from a prescribed medication, healthy food availability, an underactive thyroid problem, or you might be genetically disposed of that way.

Fat does not equate laziness, it sometimes can be part of a bigger physical or mental disability.  Beyond, disabilities there are loads of fat athletes, fat dancers, fat vegans, and fat vegetarians.  We are not a monolithic bunch of people and we all have our problems just like straight sized people.

Honestly, I can go on and on, but this post by Everyday Feminism basically broke down these myths effortlessly.  So, if you are here to demean Fat bodies, or to concern troll then you can exit stage right.  This is a fat positive zone and your trolling is not needed here.

My Journey To Fat Acceptance

I was 20 in this, and I wish I knew what I knew now.

*gasp* I was a very skinny kid all the way up to my junior year. I got charming nicknames such as “Skinny Minnie” and “Bones” as a kid.It all changed in my junior year, right before Junior prom when my metabolism slowed down and I started to pick up weight.  I, of course, panicked, because I just bought this fabulous gunmetal dress and I wouldn’t fit it.  So I did whatever one said, I stopped eating so much, started walking five days a week, and drunk all the water.  And I to my delight, I dropped all that extra weight.

I did the same thing all senior year, and I had people compliment on my weight loss and I felt empowered.

I managed to keep my weight at the norm until 2004 after I was fired from my first long-term job. Afterwards, I developed depression and anxiety, the anxiety that grew into full-blown agoraphobia (which I still struggle with to this day).  And just like a lot of people, I began to eat my feelings, and of course, I gained weight. It didn’t help that I had suddenly become a parent to a baby.

I gained more and more weight and I fell deeper into depression.  Then one day, I stumbled on Teresa Holliday (nee Munster) and Kerosene Deluxe.  They were the first plus-size models I ever saw.  There were no fat people in the mainstream media back then, and my mind was blown.  And even though, I have my problems with Teresa Holliday,  I still thank her for opening my mind to the world of body positivity.

You can be pretty and fat.  Hell, you could be a model and fat.   It was like the doors of self-hatred was blown right off its hinges.  I mean at this point, I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror.  Gradually over the years,  I discovered other fashion size influencers such as Kelly Augustine, Kristine from Trendy Curvy,  Marie Denee (The Curvy Fashionista) and Gabi Fresh. However, it wasn’t until I decided to buckle down and take my own fashion blog seriously that I thought about getting in front of the camera at the encouragement of my blogging friends Trina, Shelbee, and Martina that made me see that I wasn’t ugly at all.

It made me embrace the beauty of the color of my skin, the shape of my body, and the power of my words. Six months later, I have embraced my fatness and I’m dedicated to helping others do the same.

Redefining Fat

Fat is beautiful, and it shouldn’t be such a radical thing to say.  Yet, the mainstream media tells us otherwise.  We have my 600 life, Honey Boo-Boo, The Biggest Loser, and every celeb rag telling us that fat is disgusting.  I vehemently disagree, you shouldn’t have to lose weight to love yourself.  Join the revolution and learn how to love your body.

      Fat Is Not A Bad Word! There is nothing scarier for a woman than the word "Fat".  The word fat is fighting words, and it's always thrown at women like a gauntlet.