#the peanut gallery with two braincells

[usergayeddie]

absolutely in love with sonic and north, they are my sons, my one and only

[cksmart-world]

SMART BOMB

The Completely Unnecessary News Analysis

By Christopher Smart

December 3, 2024

FIRST LADY ELON MUSK

The wag on Donald Trump's arm is not Melania. Nope, that's Elon Musk, who is so close to the president-elect these days that he's known at Mar-A-Lago as the First Lady or something else that rhymes with Donald's “s-n-i-t-c-h.”) Elon was sitting so close to Trump at the Florida White House Thanksgiving dinner that onlookers couldn't tell Trump's drumstick from Musk's walnut dressing. And boy was Elon — the world's richest man and Trump's new efficiency czar — having a great time, howling like a hyena at Trump's jokes and slobbering praise on the man who would be king. Having the world's richest guy as your buddy has it's upside, for sure. But from the peanut gallery it's hard to tell who's benefitting more from the unnatural symbiosis. Elon gets the much needed spotlight and the ego strokes of being the big guy's unofficial financier. Trump, on the other hand, gets money and the prestige of playing puppet master to the guy who's ego is second only to his. The big question is, how long can two giant egos inhabit the same biosphere. If there is one thing Trump can't handle it's being upstaged. Musk, on the other hand, needs attention so bad that it's only a matter of time before Trump will have to take him down to size. It's going to be better than “Real Housewives.” Picture Elon Musk in a bomber jacket driving a Tesla over a cliff. Now that's entertainment.”

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION: NEWS BLACKOUT!

Hey Wilson, have you heard from folks who are going cold turkey on the news? Turning on the news has, for many, become like sticking your finger in the electric outlet. After a while you realize it just doesn't feel that good. How many times do you have to hear that Trump has chosen a rabid whack-job to head the FBI, Homeland Security, EPA, CDC, etc., etc., etc. Argh! People can take only so much before they self-medicate. That's why the staff here at Smart Bomb prefers newspapers. See Wilson, with a newspaper if you don't like the headline you can just skip the story. That can save precious braincells when contemplating things like Trump's need for revenge. (Lord knows the staff here at Smart Bomb has to conserve brain cells, self-medication not withstanding.) The Orange Monster's strategy by now is quite clear: Mess up our institutions to the point where they make the zoo's primate house look like Sunday school. His subversive cabinet picks are actually a two-edged sword — beyond driving Dems and progressives mad, hominids throughout the world are bracing for the Apocalypse. How'd you like to be in Ukraine, right now, Wilson. Gaza? Lebanon? Mexico? Canada? They didn't vote for Trump but they'll get his wrath just the same.

HARK THE HERALD ANGELS SING,

GLORY TO “BLACK FRIDAY, CYBER MONDAY”

Like Thanksgiving, Black Friday and Cyber Monday have come and gone. Like it or not, Black Friday and Cyber Monday are now part of our Christmas holiday lexicon, right along with Santa Claus, decking the halls and jingle bells. But wait, what does Santa Claus have to do with the birth of Jesus the Christ, let alone Cyber Monday. Santa is a tradition that may have started with St. Nicholas who gave gifts to children in A.D. 280 in what is now Turkey. St. Nick didn't show up in the New World until 1773 and slowly evolved into Santa Claus who rides around the globe in an airborne sleigh delivering all kinds of presents. Traditions don't necessarily have to have anything to do with anything: We've always done that so we have to keep doing it. Now, in this country, anyway, Black Friday and Cyber Monday are knocking on tradition's door. Black Friday was coined as the day when retailers broke out of red ink. But like Cyber Monday it has become an excuse to sell stuff. This, of course, is all in the name of Christmas shopping, which is supposed to be about the celebration of Christ. Only 20 shopping days left! In the spirit of giving we have to buy stuff and more stuff. What would Jesus, the champion of the poor, make of our Christmas season. Luke 12:13 — “Be careful to guard yourselves from every kind of greed. Life is not about having a lot of material possessions.” Feliz Navidad.

Post script — That's a wrap for another week here at Smart Bomb where we keep track of Druids so you don't have to. Born from the ancient Irish Celts, Druids don't observe Christmas, they celebrate the Winter Solstice on or around Dec. 21. You know, when they days begin to grow longer. It's also known as Yule and Midwinter, a day sacred to Sun Gods. According to The Order of Bards, Ovates & Druids, “Although the Bible indicates that Jesus was born in the Spring, it is no accident that the early Church chose to move his official birthday to the time of the Midwinter Solstice – for it is indeed a time when the Light enters the darkness of the World, and we see again the building of Christianity on the foundations of earlier belief.” Merry Stonehenge. No Wilson, I don't think we qualify as Jack Druids, although it does have a ring to it. The Ethiopian Christian Orthodox Church doesn't celebrate Christmas either. Perhaps the oldest Christian denomination does, however, observe the holiday Timkat on Jan. 19-20 — the celebration of the baptism of Jesus in the River Jordan. The joyous occasion is the biggest festivity of the year in the majority Christian African nation but does not include gift-giving — no Black Friday, no Cyber Monday, no Santa Claus. But if you're not looking forward to the inauguration of Trump on Jan. 20, it wouldn't be a bad place to be.

Well shucks Wilson, the holiday season is in full swing. It's not all shopping, of course. There is singing and lights and eggnog and some people even go to church. But we digress, how about you and guys in the band ring us out with something that is out of the Celtic tradition as a nod to our Celtic ancestry:

Rhiannon rings like a bell through the night And wouldn't you love to love her? Takes to the sky like a bird in flight And who will be her lover? All your life you've never seen a woman taken by the wind Would you stay if she promised you heaven? Will you ever win? She is like a cat in the dark And then she is the darkness She rules her life like a fine skylark And when the sky is starless All your life you've never seen a woman taken by the wind Would you stay if she promised you heaven? Will you ever win? Will you ever win? She rings like a bell through the night And wouldn't you love to love her? She rules her life like a bird in flight And who will be her lover? All your life you've never seen a woman taken by the wind Would you stay if she promised you heaven? Will you ever win? Will you ever win? (Rhiannon — Fleetwood Mac)

[shikai-the-storyteller]

CYBERVERSE WATCH: S3 Episode 13, 14, 15, 16

Episode 13

MACCADAM IS MY GRANDPA NOW

Jetfire!!! And Skybite!!! Skybite’s got a great laugh

Oh wow the cloaking still protects them? Nice!

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE FIX PERCY’S EYES, WHERE THE FRICK IS RATCHET

A MULTIVERSE DRIVE???

PLEASE...PLEASE LET US SEE OTHER UNIVERSES??? OTHER UNIVERSES PLEASE????

SPARE SOME MULTIVERSE STUFF FOR A POOR SOUL???

I mean as it stands, the fact that Cyberverse is talking about this stuff is more than satisfying, man I frickin love this show

“We can launch those squiggly things into a whole ‘nother universe!” his delivery of that line was so good and also Wheeljack pls, then it’ll be another version of you’s problem

MEGATRON REALLY *IS* POUTING, MEGATRON YOU BIG BABY

Maccadam fondly but watching them talk about their battle plans makes me feel so bad for him...

AW MAN IS MEGATRON GONNA CHUCK OPTIMUS INTO A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE

About time you showed up you big pouting pansy

Man these two totally were ex boyfriends

LMAO ARCEE AND SHADOW-STRIKER’S EVIL LAUGHS, THAT”S SO DELIGHTFUL

That Titan should just smack them out of the sky tbh

SKULLCRUNCHER THE CROC...NICE

I love that Soundwave and Roddy are manning the controls

“Commanders command. And you forget, we have backup” CUTE...CUTE....CUTE!!!

I’M SO PROUD OF MY BOYS!!!!!!

BEE!!!It’s been so long since I’ve seen you! I love my little yellow boy!!! Please take care of your dad Bee

OH NO IT”S CREEPY TENTACLE DOCTOR

GOTH GIRL AND PREP GIRL!!! 

MAN I JUST KNOW SOMETHING’S GOING TO GO HORRIFICALLY WRONG HERE

FRICK NOT THIS DUDE AGAIN

AW MAN NOT A WHOLE BUNCH AT ONCE

YEAAAHHHHH WHEELJACK AND MEGATRON WORKING TOGETHER!!! NICE

Two Decepticons and one Autobot...not a good sign

Oh shoot it’s the DECEPTICONS who wanna universe-jump, MEGATRON COME ON DUDE YOU DIDN’T EVEN TAKE YOUR ARMY WITH YOU DUMMY

OH NO!!!!!!

“It’s time for the commanders to join the battle” MAN YOU’RE SO COOL RODDY (YOU TOO SOUNDWAVE)

OH SHOOT THERE GOES THE TOWER

WELL FRICK

DON”T “WE DID IT” HOT ROD YOUR DAD IS IN THAT WRECKAGE

“Quintessons: Inferior. Cybertronians: Superior” MAN I”LL NEVER GET TIRED OF THAT

HE”S SO COOL!!!!! FIST BUMP BUDDIES!!! Man I’m so over the moon that these two wound up getting along

You know I’m suddenly having a revelation: I wonder if they could somehow re-activate all those other Soundwaves to help them against the (inevitable) final battle I’m sure they’re gonna have

WHAT THE FRICK

ARE YOU FRICKIN KIDDING ME

Starscream: CANCELED, CANCELED, YOU”RE ALL CANCELED

Well, Megatron certainly got the heck out of dodge at the right time lmao

Episode 14

I legit thought they were going to do an ATLA ref for half a second

Oh my gosh is this an Autobot recruitment video???

“The universe. You ever thought about it?” GOSH THIS VIDEO....

I’m frickin cackling, the Quintessons were like “Hmm, what’s the worst thing we could possibly inflict on this planet?” then went “Oh, of course, Starscream”

WHY DIDN”T YOU JUST LET GO STARSCREAM

Wow Starscream really did just sell out his entire planet huh

SOUNDWAVE NO!!!!! JEEZ HE GOT EVERYONE

Jeez and Starscream has to share with two other faces, that sucks

Lmao Starscream is just like “Nah judging people is what I was born for”

UNSPACE??? UH OK

WAIT isn’t that what Wheeljack made a few episodes ago????

LMAO HE’S GONNA WAIT TIL HE CAN GET OPTIMUS AND MEGATRON TOO bless Starscream and his pettiness

“First I must witness their humiliation!” STARSCREAM PLEASE the Quintessons really got the worst Judge

OHHH WHAT’S HE GONNA DO

SOUNDWAVE YOU’RE SO POWERFUL!!!!!

OH NO HE GOT THEM AGAIN....

GOSH I ACTUALLY GASPED WHEN THEY BROKE SOUNDWAVE’S AUDIO THING, NO!!!

“Well, it did for one of us, and it only takes one Autobot to make a difference” Bee? Whirl??? Wheeljack???

WINDBLADE!!! EVEN BETTER!!! The person with the braincell!!!

I love that Rodimus doesn’t even look worried, he just sighs like “aw man not this loser again”

On the one hand: Worried about my boys On the other: Man I love these two being buds

Also: Not To Be That Guy But it looks like Soundwave’s wearing white thigh-highs with little orange hearts on them and it’s VERY distracting

“You two work so well together!!!” OH NO OH NO OH NO ARE THEY GONNA FUSE THEM TOGETHER OR SOMETHING

THOSE HEAD MASKS ARE SO DISTURBING

uh oh what kind of loop is this

THE PLAGUE OF RUST OH NO

oh my gosh STARSCREAM’S MAKING THEM DO A BUFFING LOOP...THAT’S REALLY THE WORST THING YOU COULD THINK OF STARSCREAM....

“WHERE ARE MEGATRON AND OPTIMUS PRIME” well Optimus is under a pile of concrete, so

Lmao thank you for your peanut-gallery commentary Kup

OH SHOOT THEY DID JUMP THROUGH THE MULTIVERSE BRIDGE

MAN THAT LOOKS SO FRICKIN COOL???? YO SHOUTOUT TO THE BACKGROUND ARTISTS WHO WORKED ON THIS SHOW, YOU ROCK

SERIOUSLY IM IN LOVE WITH THAT I hope whoever did the background art shares their work online sometime, I’ll be ALL over that

AHH I ALWAYS FORGET HOW SHORT THESE EPISODES ARE

Excuse me, Jeremy Levy as WHO???

Episode 15

Kup you are an...interesting commentator choice lmao

MACCADAM..... :(

Windblade please save our favorite Grandpa

wINDBLADE!

HOW’S IT FEEL BEING THE COOLEST KID ON THE BLOCK WINDBLADE

Wait I *JUST* noticed the title calls this “Bumblebee: Cyberverse Adventures” ???? IS THAT NEW

CALL ME A SUCKER BUT WINDBLADE CRACKING HER NECK AND TELLING THE LITTLE SHARK DUDES TO BRING IT ON WAS QUITE POSSIBLY ONE OF THE BEST MOMENTS OF THE SERIES SO FAR

Windblade: *does anything* Me: IM GAY

“I don’t do fear” GOSH I LOVE MY TALENTED GIRL

OH NO!!! OH NO!!!! WINDBLADE NO!!!!!

AND HER WINGS TOO??? WHY!!!!

MACCADAM HELP HER OUT COME ON DUDE WHAT HAPPENED TO NO FIGHTING

lmao rip at the dude crushed by the juke box

Wait I thought they already woke up Iaconus??

YEAH!!!!!!!! MACCADAM AND WINDBLADE TEAMING UP

“UNFORGIVABLE CRIMES AGAINST ME!” LMAO I LOVE THAT LITERALLY EVERYONE IS TUNING OUT STARSCREAM get rekt Starscream.

Not to rag on people who like Starscream because I like him too but me @ Starscream stans tbh 

You guys just need to hold hands! I mean seriously, come on you guys!

STARSCREAM QUINTESSONS OMG I just noticed they’re all wearing Starscream’s colors pffft

AW.....MACCADAM’S FIRST HIGH-FIVE....:’) I bet Windblade and Maccadam both give the best hugs and best high-fives 

They’re so cute MAN I love Cyberverse!!!! I love how sweet these characters are!!!

A psychic trap??? Hoo boy

Windblade: How do I defeat this psychic trap? Maccadam: Well, it would help if you had any bug or dark-type Pokemon on you.

“Or you could just tell me!” I JUST SAID THAT TOO LMAO gosh I love the writing on this show

OHHH I LOVE THE CONTRAST OF IACONUS’ BRAIN WITH BEE’S BRAIN IN SEASON ONE, THAT”S SO GOOD

OH LMAO HE MEANT HER SWORD I thought he meant like “your inner-strength” or “your wisdom” NO HE MEANT “USE YOUR SWORD WINDBLADE” LOL

OHHH SPOOKY VOICE, I DIG IT

Wow Starscream’s really reading out his 1000 page long call-out post to a captive audience

LMAO THEY”RE JUST LISTING OUT DATE LOCATIONS

CHROMIA IS SO CUTE!!!!!!!! AHHH

OH NO ARCEE!!!!

I LOVE ARCEE, “HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT YOU BASTARD”

OH SHOOT JK I GUESS THEY REALLY DIDN”T TOTALLY WAKE HIM  UP LAST TIME I was wondering why he was just an arm

TITAN TIME!!!

Episode 16

To toast the flares off a neutron star....cute....

Wouldn’t it be cute if Kup was telling this story to a bunch of baby Cybertronians

Awh....Maccadam I’m sorry your old Titan had to re-awaken :(

“Too bad I won’t know how it ends” OH NO ARE YOU GUYS GONNA KILL OFF MACCADAM???? NO!!!!

Iaconus looks frickin RAD I’m sure Hasbro will make a killing off his toys

Speaking of I really hope they release Cyberverse on DVD in a bundle-pack

“War Titan, do NOT ignore me!” YEAH USE YOUR MOM VOICE ON HIM WINDBLADE!!!

LOVE THAT ROCK MUSIC

“This has never happened before” now THERE’S an interesting tidbit

OH NO....ITS THE OTHER TITAN....CROATON....

on the one hand, I’m SO glad we’re getting the Titan battle I crave, but on the other, CROATON NO!!!

TRIFORCE BEAM!!!

I love that Windblade is Jaeger-ing this frickin Titan solo

WHOOPS THERE GOES THE STADIUM

“Optimus had a fight of his own...with gravity!” oh how the mighty have fallen Optimus lmao

I wonder how this wonky universe would handle a flier

JUST THROW A BUILDING AT A TITAN, NBD

SOMEONE PLEASE CATCH ARCEE

THANKS GRIMLOCK

THERE’S RATCHET Finally, I was wondering where he was

“Well it’s not my fault this won’t be a fair fight” OH SHOOT THERE IT IS!!! THERE IT IS

I can’t believe Starscream is trying to back-seat drive this fight lmao

SOUNDWAVE NO!!!! Oh thank goodness they’re ok

OH NO OH NO

IS THIS IT IS HE GONNA DIE?? MAC DONT GIVE IN TO FATE!!!  NO!!!

MAC NO!!!!!!!!!! MAC YOU DIDN”T HAVE TO DIE NO!!! YOU LITERALLY DID NOT HAVE TO STAND THERE AND GET BLASTED WHY DID YOU DO THAT!!!!!!!

“My last citizen...he is gone” FRICK IM GONNA START CRYING

Quints > Murdered Croaton's citizens most likely > Enslave Croaton > Inadvertently kill Iaconus' last citizen (WHICH HURT BECAUSE WE'RE MADE TO ASSUME IACONUS ONLY CARES ABOUT WAR BUT NO, HE LOVES HIS CITIZENS DEEP DOWN) > BEHEAD IACONUS LIKE, WHY YOU GOTTA STAB ME IN THE HEART LIKE THIS

Wheeljack you’re so smart but ALSO IM STILL CRYING OVER MACCADAM

“Hehe, you’re a nasty little fella” NICE JOB COWBOY

OH NO ALL THE SOUNDWAVES DANGIT I KNEW IT

AND HE”S A BIG LIAR HE DID HAVE SOME BLUE SOUNDWAVES

OH NO WHAT ABOUT WINDBLADE

HECK THAT”S SUCH A BAD PLACE TO STOP BUT I CANT WATCH ANY MORE EPISODES RN I GOTTA STAGGER THIS SERIES