#the only one that comes to mind right now is burlesque

[moodient]

The Devil's Heel Click

tags: sfw (sorry!!) drinking, burlesque, singing, murder, mom!reader, smoking, heavy romantic tension, badass!reader!, teasing, and edging for the reader-

relationship: sevika and reader

a//n: okay, tumblr.. you like me and you care about me so you're gonna post right? YAY! LESBIANS!! ( please tell me you get the reference.) Also thank you guys so much for the love and support on this, I low-key made this on a whim but uh yeah. also y'all might hate me for this but I decided against the smut.. IM NOT GOOD AT IT

episode/part 2:

The song started to play, as the lights dimmed and shined on the stage. Everyone’s eyes were on the stage now.. A long and sexy leg peeps through the stage covers.

‘You like?~’ You sang, a little more of you started to peep through. Cheers start to blast through the bar as they recognize your voice, the same drip of honey and the same amount of deadly venom.

‘Don’t be scared.. Come closer~’ Your hand comes through the cover with a c’mere finger sign. Some men come closer to the stage, respecting the rules.

No touching until she gives permission.

And you better tip well, if not.

You’ll see what happens.

Pushing your full body out, with the light shining on you, your eyes filled with faux lust and seductive prowess.. letting a shoulder of your robe slip.. ‘You' never saw me like this before, huh?’ You sung leaning over to one of the men, his eyes looking down at your breasts licking his lips.

Your eyes showed a quick sense of disgust before putting on your fake lustful gaze. ‘Look~’ as you sing to him, allowing him to peel a little more of your robe, as he does that, he shoves a coin in between your breasts, you wink at him leaving him there. To make sure he knows his place, you flick his nose.. HARD. The man cowers back rubbing his nose, tears flowing from his face.

You got up quickly, and started to sing. Feeling on yourself in front of the crowd a little, giving them that edge that’ll send them over the moon.

‘I’ve been a goody, daddy.. But I don’t have to be..~’ you sang, to the center of the stage, grabbing one of the men right in front of you by the collar, whispering in his ear, him feeling the vibration of your throat. ‘But if you want me to, I’ll be your nasty, baby~’ you continued, slowly stripping from the robe but quickly putting it back on, they don't get to have all their eggs all in one basket. They have to earn it.

You rise once more to slowly start showing more of your legs off, hearing whistles and ‘woos’ as you walk to the center, teasing them with little glances of the treasure that they obviously couldn't have.. a kiss leaving them craving more, but they only get a peck..

‘No time for games, no rules, just play.. Hope you've been thinking about the same thing.’ As you do, men start piling coins and giant bags of coins on the stage, and they can finally have it. You finally dropped the robe, showing your curvy form. Your smooth skin with a silver shimmer enchanted with the fluorescent lights. The men went absolutely wild, almost like hounds waiting for their prey, an uncontrollable heat appearing on their faces, whether it’s the alcohol or you turning them on. You were truly an aphrodisiac, but with a numbing taste and sweet smell.

‘I'm just sayin’ what’s on your mind, it’s been good but now it’s time..~’ you sang, coming down the stage.. The men’s favorite part, having the slimiest chance of being touched by you. Either it’s you being on their lap or a small touch of their neck. They crave you like pubescent teenagers, some of them licking their lips as they see your thighs jiggle a little, walking down. Some women blush as you give them glances and winking at them. ‘To show love, what we’re made.. of’ As much as you love riling up the crowd.. you had a secret agenda, finding that man. As you sang, you gave out small kisses on peoples’ cheeks or caressing their face shortly, getting high off of your touch, here and there. And boom, you found him.

A man with ginger hair and a long mustache, very clean-looking and clothes neatly put together. His freckles slap him from cheek to cheek. Definitely doesn't belong here, Bingo.

Looking at you, this is the time.. You swayed your hips towards him, playing in your hair, biting your lip. He looks at you as if you’re his last meal.. Whistles and catcalls were made to you as you made your way towards the man.

But fortunately, they know they will be ignored once you find the person you wanted. You finally made it towards him and you got on his table, taking one of his hands and allowing him to touch on you and oh he did, from your knees to your breasts. As you sang to him, you made sure that it was enough, making sure he got his fix but that it was not even close enough for him. He smirked at you with lust and as disgusted as you felt, you had to tell yourself, not yet..

‘I hope you want me in the same way~’

‘Every time I close my eyes, all I dream about is making love.. I can’t even think at night, all I dream about is making love..~’

You got off of him and winked as you went to your next victim, not to murder but to lure in a trap that they can’t run from.. As the song is about to end, you see her.. A woman with a cigarillo in her mouth, in a corner booth, drinking whiskey. Dark skin, extremely muscular, dark brown hair, gray eyes and.. a mechanical arm? She even has scars that glow blue. Hot.

At first, she seemed uninterested. Until she feasted her eyes on you. You can't tell if it's interest, lust, or if she's being coy or maybe just confused. And then she turns to face you completely. You got her.

You smirked and walked over to her but instead of the table, you got on her lap. Her slate eyes are unreadable but there is one emotion that you can read easily, lust and she's full of it. ‘It’s just all the things I see when you’re inside of me, that keeps ímy mind goin’ crazy..’

‘Like that, mm, like that~’ You sang, putting her hands on your hips. ‘Tease me, please me, spank me, feed me.. You know what I need, baby..’ You can feel her eyes looking at you up and down, examining your body and slowly moving her hands around.. lower.. lower.. lower.. and you can feel the heat on your cheeks rising. You never blushed from a client or a performance so why are you blushing now?

Before anything serious happens, you have to move before you just say fuck it. But you fight your urges, you get up and the song finishes, just like that. You go back towards the stage, do your signature heel click and grab your robe and kiss the crowd goodbye. Just like that, you quickly got up to find that man. The men went back to their seats and continued drinking, after your performance, light music started to play to fill the ambience.

You started looking around for him, and he was in the same spot before.. Looking for you. You smiled at him, and told him to come here. He quickly jumps up to walk towards you.

“Wanna get a drink?~” You said, watching his eyes become more filled with lust and he quickly nods. You giggle, leading him upstairs to your office. It was filled with red lights, a rundown table but it stands strong. A small bar that had wines and hard alcohol on it but had a bucket of ice with wine in it, complimentary after every performance.. a bookshelf filled to the brim and paintings of you and Alica when she was a child. A giant couch, soft but also has rough edges and a window with a beautiful view of Zaun.

“Have a seat, I’ll make you a drink, fancy anything special?” You asked, walking over to the bar quickly pouring the vial of poison in a wine glass, and looking over at him as he sits on the couch. “Hm, how about something aged but sweet?” He says before biting his lips.

“Like you.” He winked as you looked over at him and giggled, ’fucking disgusting..’ You thought but you have to get this done and at this point, you were happy to do it.. As you turned towards him, you handed him a glass of sweet red cherry wine and a shot of vodka, one of your favorites.

You poured yourself a small amount of wine and clinked glasses, he took a drink of his and you took baby sips of yours, allowing the taste of the wine to hit every single taste bud.

You both began to talk about what he does for work, and who he works with, he kept naming one person in particular, Marcus.. ‘What an absolute idiot.’ you thought as he continued to drink. Then all of a sudden, he drinks all of it. Your eyes widen at him as he licks his lips. “So, how about that other.. request, hm?~” He asked, looking at your thighs.. You looked at his hands as you noticed his fingertips started turning blue.

You got on top of him and laid him back on the couch and tied up his arms and legs..”Kinky girl..” he says looking at you. He tries to kiss you but you stop him, “No kissing allowed, honey~” you giggled. He sighs but understands and you begin kissing on his neck. 'This poison is NOT quick, but maybe this guy has a strong resistance to whatever it is.’ You thought as you watched his expression.

His moans, rigid and harsh, he pretty much sounds like a broken engine. You continue to go on, trying to go with the flow until he starts choking, he tries to reach for you, he needs your help. His eyes are rolling to the back of his head, feeling the poison, feeling it take control of his body and stopping it from functioning.

You just watched him, and you get up to lock the door and watch him slowly suffocate on the poison. Leaning against the door, you just patiently waited for the poison to hit every vein, every nerve and finally after about one minute, he stopped moving.

You walk close to him, and lay your head on his chest, listening for a heartbeat, nothing. But you got to seal the deal. You went and grabbed an ice picker and without a thought, stabbed him. You watch as the blood starts to pour down his body and realized.. "Aw fuck, my couch!" You said, pinching the bridge of your nose and sighing. You'll have to clean it later but first..

The body, you stripped naked so it wouldn’t stain your clothes any further and carried him to the edge of the window, straight into some large body of water. You went to the bathroom, rinsed the blood off your body, changed into another leotard not as sparkly but it'll do. Took the ice pick with you, and went quickly to Silco’s room. You did the signature knock and he said ‘Come in.’

You opened the door but he wasn’t alone, he was with the.. woman from before. You walked towards him and sighed. He looks at you with judgement, not sure if you did the job or not, until you showed him the ice picker. Covered in the man’s blood.

“Good job, indeed. And is he-” You cut him off before he could finish his question, “disposed of and cleaned the room.” You said, looked at him. His eyes shine with proudness but you did it, you've earned his trust.

You didn’t even notice she was just looking at you, but not with the same lustful eyes from before. They're now filled with interest, curiosity and a little bit of.. shock?

Silco then notices that he never introduced you two, “Ah, Darling. This is Sevika, she is my right-hand woman from now on.” You nodded, Sevika.. huh? That's such a pretty name.. “And Sevika, this is Darling,” She nods, hearing him, and she keeps her gaze on you.

It's intimidating, she does have head honcho energy which kinda turns you a little more than you’d like to admit. Right-hand woman and left eye woman.. You laugh to yourself, thinking about it. Snapping you out of your thoughts, she walks up to you, footsteps heavy but slow, almost anticipating what she’ll do once she’s in front of you.

“The honor is all mine.” She says, her voice a deeper octave than what you were expecting and god, she truly sounds like a dream. You both shake hands and she all of a sudden kisses the back of your hand, gaining a slight blush from you.

“What a flatterer.” You teased, removing your hand from hers. You quickly cleared your throat, before telling him about what you learned, that Silco’s other undercover alliances from Piltover are slowly losing trust in him. Especially Marcus. He nods and then pulls out a cigar and starts to smoke.

You get up and conclude your quick meeting with Silco and Sevika, you stretch and wave them both goodbye before you head down to the bar for another drink. Well, you did it and you won Silco’s respect if that means anything for you.

As you made it downstairs, music was playing through the jukebox.. some underground group that had a mixture of rock and jazz. You were truly a lover of music, it has helped through the darkest and lightest of times. It was a beautiful way to express yourself, and a soother for hard times, whether it was relating to work, taking care of Alica or even Silco.

Feeling the music hit you, you danced and swayed as you make your way to the bar, you see Thieram cleaning some glasses with a cloth, he nods at you and you went to take a seat, one leg on top of the other, and as you nodded to the music, he poured a glass of the same cherry wine, you look at it and thanked him before taking a sip.

“You did really well tonight, Darling, lots of tips!” He says as he finishes cleaning the last glass before leaning over the bar counter, looking at you. You thanked him, and frowned a little bit before finishing the whole thing of wine.

“Hey, Thieram.. Could you get me something stronger?” You said looking at him. He looks at you, a bit shocked because you usually go for something light but you need to ease your nerves, but Thieram could already tell after examining your expression. He sighed and nodded. Thieram was the one who kept you safe when you were in a state like this, shooing away perverts, bringing you napkins and even going on break to take care of you, he made you feel safe, of course. You didn’t really have friends besides Thieram and Ran, who kept you company or just wanted to occupy your space which you never minded. He cleaned off your glass and poured you whiskey.

“But this is your ONLY glass, got that? Last time you were drunk, I had to send all the goonies to get you from running around Zaun naked.” He said, sighing. You both laughed at the past memory of you, running around Zaun topless while there were four guys chasing you down. “You know they’ll never catch me..” You said, smirking at him, taking a sip of the whiskey.

You looked around and seemed confused, “Where’s Ran?” You asked, looking ‘round for them. “They’re on a delivery run, ‘should be back tomorrow.”You nodded and continued sipping the whiskey.

He realizes that there’s people waiting for him to pour them drinks and he pats your shoulder, you nudge your head at them and allow yourself to enjoy your atmosphere. The music’s mellow but enough for you to listen to its rough edges, from the guitar, to the drums, and the guy singing. It felt perfect at the moment, as you enjoyed the burn from the alcohol, you felt a presence sitting right beside you. Keeping your eyes on the glass, you look to your peripheral to see it’s Sevika, watching you enjoy the whiskey.

“You want a glass?” You asked her, as she continued to stare you down. She scoffed and grabbed your glass with her left hand and drank a bit of it. You noticed that instead of it being a human hand, it’s metal.. Sharp, edged with murder in mind but you know she wasn’t going to hurt you in any way, shape or form. Or would she?

You didn’t really focus on it because every time you were around her, you both were stuck in some trance. You laughed a little and took your glass back from her as you turned to face her. She really is something else, her wide but strong physique pierced through her clothing, making everything pronounced..

Her eyes were everything, dark, piercing, but also expressive. The stone colored irises that shone through the bar light. Her nose, broad and hooked and it has you hooked on her, her dark lips as they smirked at you, such a welcoming gesture. From her shoulders, to her perfect breasts, to her flat but wide stomach, and her massive thighs. She was beautiful to you.. Her dark brown hair was in a short bob, but she had a small ponytail on the back of her head, very neat and very cute. Her arms were covered by a dark red cloak with black markings. She was an absolute goddess to you, to others she might seem intense and fierce but you just see a woman who is in control of her mind, body, and soul. But she was very interesting to you.

Clearing your throat and thoughts, you take a sip of whiskey not realizing you both shared a non-direct kiss but you continue. "Well, how is it?"

“T’is good.” She says, grabbing it again, taking another sip. You just simply watch her drink from your glass. Kind of wishing you were that glass, I mean what? You shake your head from your fantasies and you look back to see Alica, using her two hands and making them kiss. You rolled your eyes at her and smiled. Alica went back to work and took away people’s glasses and plates.

“So, what did you think of my performance, Sevika?” Her eyes widen as she stops herself from taking another drink. Her remembering you being on her lap and moving her hands around over your body. “It was.. enticing.” Sevika said, choosing her words wisely.

You laughed as she took another sip. “Why?~ You’ll miss me? Or do you want me to jump in your lap again?” You said teasing her, taking the last sip of whiskey. Her eyes glanced at you for a quick second and back to the drink that was no longer yours. In her eyes she would like nothing more than to take you in this bar and absolutely ravish you. "Actually.. I would." She said, nonchalant to how bold she's being.

“I liked it, seeing you own the place..” She said, placing her hand on your thigh. You looked where she placed her hand and almost felt yourself collapse. Her voice was extremely dangerous, something about that deep, rich voice is so close to sending you over the edge. You turned to face her, getting super close to her face, feeling her breath on yourself. She looked down at your lips before your eyes. The tension you two constantly created is so thick. You couldn’t even cut it with a heated blade, you both created this closed off space, filled with anticipation and desire for one another.

You both freeze waiting for one of you to make the first move, you slowly start to lean in and you can tell she's hesitant but starts to lean in as well. Eyes starting to close, mouths slightly agaped, synchronized, heartbeats. Just as your lips were about to connect, you get up quickly from your seat and fix yourself. “I perform every other night. See you around, Sevika.” You said, winking at her and leaving a tip for Thieram, as always.. As you left, you couldn’t help but laugh as you felt Sevika’s eyes all over your ass. She hated seeing you leave, but loved watching you go.

She watches as you talk with Alica and she watches as Alica nods and gives you a kiss on the cheek and a hug. You then walk out the door and Sevika’s world goes silent. She smirks at the thought of you and asks Thieram for another drink. As he prepares another glass, she couldn’t stop thinking about you and how you ended up working with Silco in the first place... Hoping to see you more than often.

She goes off to enjoy the rest of her night at the brothel, feeling the sexual tension but needing to get it out of her system. Of course, she goes with the girl who almost has the same physique as you, but it’s not enough. She needed you. She craved you, the worst part is that she paid the girl, got up halfway, tipped her and left. The girl was obviously confused and slightly offended but she understood.

The need for you was bad, she decided that she needed to go take care of it herself, but little did she know that on her way home, she saw you, walking to the same apartment complex she lived in, she watched as you talked with the landlord, laughing and joking around and now wishing them goodnight.

'Now would you look at that..~’ She felt herself smirking a little more than she’d liked to. Making her way towards the complex.

[bluessmutifyplaylist]

(Horny Round 2!!!)

Reader is a burlesque dancer, cuz they got mouths to feed, and Old Man Lilia gives them a proposition: put on a show for him and his boys so they can learn how to best please their future lovers. Voyeurism, corruption kink, Daddy Lilia~

Characters are aged up!! I based it off of this YouTube video as well as a few pole-dancing videos.

Warnings: Reader is not Yuu, AFAB but with GN pronouns, corruption kink, voyeurism, pole dancing, strip teasing, lap dance, dry humping, foursome, penetrative (p in v) sex, corruption of the future king and his knights, jerking Sebek and Silver off, overstimulation, creampie(s), blowjob(s)

Diasomnia

There was a dancing troupe coming to the Briar Valley, and they came around annually in the summer because it gave the citizens something to look forward to. Well, it wasn’t just the dancing troupe. It was an entire fair, but the dancing was the main show. During the day, the dances were all child-friendly, and the children were even allowed to hop up on the stage sometimes to join the dancers.

However, after the clock struck 8:30 PM, the doors were closed for children, and the dancers went into their dressing rooms and brought out the more… provocative… outfits. This was a time for an adult audience, and maybe a few teenagers in the older margin who managed to sneak in somehow.

You were with your girls in the back, making sure that your red lipstick was applied pristinely. You had large feathered fans, and a rather revealing outfit that was covered up a bit with a tutu. Your fellow dancers were all hyping each other up, and you saw one of them slap another on the ass as she went on stage, saying go get ‘em, tiger! It made you laugh… until the matron of the troupe called your name.

Getting up from your seat, you walked over, fans in hand, nervous that you were going to get fired. This entire fair was your livelihood. If you were to be let go, not only would you suffer, but so would the family members you’ve been sending money to. Your heart was racing as you walked up to the matron, heels clacking against the floor.

“Y/N, someone has requested our best dancer for a large sum of money. I know the financial situation you are in and you are the first that came to mind. Plus, you are one of our finest dancers, so I am giving you the option, should you accept, to give our esteemed guests a private show.”

“Madame, I don’t mean to sound selfish or money-obsessed, but how-”

“They are offering 1 million thaumarks, and I have the check in this envelope right here,” She held up an envelope, emphasizing that this was real and not a joke. Then, she brought her arm back down, and extended it to you. “You don’t need to have sex with them, but the… leader?... of the group wanted for them to have an experience with something so informal as the fair.”

“Umm…” This was probably the biggest decision of your life. 1 million thaumarks?! There was no way that you were going to pass that up. So, you nodded your head, “Yes, I will do it.”

“Good! This is yours, then! They will be in Room 1 in about 45 minutes. Your routine should be fine, as the man said he wanted it to be ‘culturally enlightening’.” She then walked off, and you were left staring at the envelope now in your hands.

“Holy fu-”

~~~~~~~~

In the aforementioned room, 4 men were sitting, discussing the plan for the evening. Three of them had no idea what was going to happen, while the ‘leader’ was explaining everything.

“Alright, boys. As you know, this is not a children’s show. However, I wanted you to learn something about the art of burlesque dancing. It’s quite sensual, but it gives power to the performer because they have the audience in their hands just with the way they move.”

“LILIA-SAMA, I AM GRATEFUL THAT YOU HAVE GIVEN US THIS EDUCATIONAL OPPORTUNITY, BUT I FAIL TO SEE WHY THIS WOULD BE IMPORTANT!” Sebek was immediately shushed, being told that he needed to keep the volume of his voice down.

“Well, it will teach-” Lilia was cut off by the room going dark. The thing about these rooms was that they were really smaller-scale tents behind the large one. In addition to that, the small tents had platforms in the middle of them for the dancer, along with a pole.

Spotlights came on, highlighting you and your large fans. You were wearing a bustier, corset, panties, and a tutu, and you were wearing bright red lipstick as well as elbow-length gloves. Your heels sparkled in the light. You bent down, one leg in front of the other, using one fan to cover your rear end and the other to point at your outstanding foot.

“Hello, boys~” Your voice said. Then, the music started up, and you started to dance. Sharply moving your hips up and down, making sure that your toes were always pointed so that your legs looked longer. You could feel their hungry gazes on you, and you smiled as you reached your hands behind you, going to untie the tutu.

Shimmying it down your waist, you could tell who the leader was. You know he had been at previous adult shows, as his pink hair was hard to miss. However, based on the reactions of the one with light green hair and the one with silver hair, you guessed that this was the first adult show they had been to. You were happy to be their first. As for the one with the horns, you could see that he was genuinely interested in the art as well as you.

Once it was off, you threw it like a frisbee to the man with green hair. You smiled and winked at him as his face was glowing an even brighter red. Truly, his face would put your red lipstick to shame.

You then turned to the silver-haired one and ushered him over to the stage. You turned around, making sure to bend over as much as you could, and then you asked if he could untie your corset. He nodded his head and went to untie it, struggling a little because his hands were shaking. You heard the ‘leader’ shout something.

“Let him take it off of you!”

Smiling, you looked at the man and he was also frozen in place. Did you really have that effect on men?

Whispering, you asked, “Would you like to help me take it off?” You giggled as he nodded, pulling at the strings pair by pair, and you worked on unclasping the front of it. Once it was off, you threw it to the horned man while placing a rather passionate kiss on the silver-haired man’s lips. Breaking apart, you saw that you left red lipstick on his lips, but you gently pushed him back in his seat.

Standing back up, you headed to the pole. You weren’t as advanced in pole dancing as some of your fellow dancers, but you did know how to do the basics. You grabbed the pole, pulling your body to it, slowly sliding down, placing your fans down on the ground. Once you were squatting down, you started grinding against the pole. You stood back up slowly, locking eyes with the leader, and then you sauntered over to him after picking up one of your fans.

Straddling him, you threw your arms around his neck and he placed his hands upon your hips gently, making sure you aren’t feeling pressured to do anything you don’t want to. You placed a kiss on his lips this time, making sure to rub your clothed regions against his growing boner. For him being a rather small man, you could tell that he definitely had a disproportionate size, but it just further served to arouse you.

This small group of men was different from others you have danced for. They appreciated your art, and they weren’t groping you in a way that made you uncomfortable. They allowed you to go to them first, and you loved it. You stood up, repositioning yourself in a reverse cowgirl position, and leaned back into him. He placed kisses upon the crook of your neck, and you used your fan to cover up the way you were grinding back down on him.

You can’t remember a time where you felt genuine pleasure from one of these dances, but you felt yourself growing wet as you continued your actions. You felt one of his hands slowly reach up to cup your bra-clad breast and one reach down to your panties, giving you a chance to stop him, but you didn’t. You instead tossed away your fan so that the other guys could see what was going on.

“Call me ‘Lilia’, love~” He whispered into your ear before using his fangs to bite into your neck. There was a bit of pain, but pleasure soon followed, and it wasn’t enough to draw blood anyway. Otherwise, you might have guessed he was a vampire.

“Call me ‘Y/N’,” You whispered back, letting out a gasp when he started rubbing your clit. His other hand went under your bra and he started fondling your breast, rolling your nipple between his thumb and pointer finger. You looked back at the other men and you were surprised to see them drawing closer.

“Alright, Y/N. I wanted you here because I want to teach these boys how to pleasure somebody. However, I need verbal consent,” He said louder, stopping what he was doing so that you could answer.

“You have my consent, Lilia,” Upon saying that, he immediately shoved a finger into your awaiting pussy, making you moan at the sudden intrusion. You could feel his finger curling and moving inside of you, and you simply wanted more. 

As your hips rolled to try and get more friction, you ended up rubbing more and more against his erection, making him groan. 

“So wet for me~” He snickered, looking at your little audience, “Boys, you never want to just go right ahead and stick your dick inside someone without a little bit of preparation and foreplay. After all, you want them to be aroused and participating.

That’s another thing: basic consent and participation. Depending on what you are into, all parties involved must be participating and making sure it is a pleasurable experience for those involved.

Please stand up, love.” 

You followed his orders, saddened that he took his hands out of your bra and panties. Then, you heard his belt unbuckle and his pants slide down, and you felt your underwear slide down your legs. The cold air hits your exposed regions like a block of ice, making you shudder. It didn’t go unnoticed by anybody in the tent.

“Now you may sit back down,” Lining up your entrance with the tip of his cock, he put his hands on your hips to guide you. Feeling him fill you up finally could have made you cum alone, but his size made your eyes roll back in pleasure. You tried covering your mouth to block any moans from coming out, but his hand blocked yours. “Let those pretty noises out, dearie. These boys need to learn what pleasure sounds like.”

Nodding, you put your hand back down as he started to guide you up and down on his cock. 

Oh, oh, ohhh’s enunciated each drop down, with an occasional fuckkkk. You didn’t even notice the silver and green-haired knights get close and right next to you, unbuckling their pants as well. 

“Y/N, you wouldn’t mind giving these guys a bit of the pleasure you’re feeling, would you?” You looked to see them with their dicks out, and you quickly reached out your arms and hands to start jerking them off. The horned man continued watching you all, a smirk on his face.

Up, down, up, down, up, down. Your hips went up and down on Lilia’s member, your hands went up and down on the knights’ cocks, the horned man’s eyes went up and down following you. Every single time Lilia hit that special spot inside of you, you squeezed on the dicks in your hands, making the two men groan.

The man with bright green hair had already came, and now he was just a tad sensitive. You guessed he was at least part fae based on his fangs, so his durability had to be amazing. If you were being honest, you were not far behind, and you found your climax washing over you as you slumped, but your eyes snapped open when Lilia kept thrusting up into you.

“You didn’t think I was done… did you? Neither are any of these fine gentlemen. Tell me, Y/N, where do you want me to cum?” 

“I-Inside… Please, please, please inside!” You cried, and you had felt another orgasm wash over you as he came inside of you. You were panting, feeling the warmth of his cum painting your walls white.

“I would be willing to have a turn with them, Lilia,” The horned man said, and his height intimidated you. The dick imprint that you could see against his pants intimidated you as well. However, you found yourself somehow getting aroused again, and, stumbling, you walked over to him.

With a snap of his fingers, you saw that his pants were off and folded neatly on the side. His size was unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. To be fair, it’s not like you slept around, but you have had a few flings here and there in the different places you performed. No beastmen could come close to comparing.

“I’m aware I’m… better endowed than most. If you wish, I could prepare you more-”

“That isn’t going to be necessary, sir. I think I’m ready.” You really need to think about what you say before you say it, but you just couldn’t wait to have that absolute monster inside of you. You decided that you would straddle him, cowgirl-style, so that you could work at your own pace.

However, he had other plans.

Placing his hands on your hips, he shoved you all the way down, and tears leaked from your eyes. You groaned in both pain and pleasure, burying your head in his shoulder, adjusting to his size.

“Tell me when you want to start moving.” It took a few moments, but you eventually nodded and he began moving you up and down again. Luckily, he had strength to do it for you entirely, as your legs gave up.

“Do you think you could bend backwards enough to suck this young man off?” Lilia asked. Being a dancer granted you a level of flexibility that actually allowed you to do this. You leaned back as far as you could, just to be met with the silver-haired man’s cock. 

Oh, yeah… he hasn’t cum yet, you realized. Opening your mouth, he slid the tip in. It was quite unusual to be giving a blowjob in this position, but you were always down to be a bit more adventurous in such activities. His size was the smallest in this group of men, but it still wasn’t anything to laugh at.

“Oh, fuck…” The man muttered under his breath. What you couldn’t see was that as he was thrusting into your throat slowly, there was a bit of a bulge. Your mouth was so warm. You moaned around his dick, adding even more stimulation. On your left, Lilia and the green-haired man were each stroking themselves, watching you get absolutely railed by these two men.

Earlier that day, your matron said you didn’t have to have sex with them. Lilia even told you that you could tell them to stop. However, they were both wrong. You did have to have sex with them, and you couldn’t tell them to stop. If you turned this down, you might have to have yourself committed to a mental asylum because no one in their right mind would turn down an opportunity like this.

[cipheramnesia]

Really struggling to wrap my head around this movie, because it really falls outside the boundaries of conventional understanding.

Let me back up. I am on a small vision quest for apocalyptic movies which are somehow deviant from the norm. Ever since I saw Scavenger (Carroña 2020), I've been trying to find something with the same kind of raw ugliness. (Sidebar, Carroña has a big sexual assault dead dove do not eat warning, it's beyond excessive) Now I need to truly find where that weird itch of dead dystopian worlds is coming from. (Second sidebar, not asking for suggestions. If you were thinking of suggesting Six String Samurai definitely don't make other suggestions. If your first thought was Zombie Strippers you're probably on the right wavelength.) I've trawled together a list with potential and my first watch certainly hit something, but what?

Some movies are so far detached from anything like narrative or form that they become more of a projection of a deep inner animus of the filmmaker, an unguarded glimpse inside a human brain with all the beauty and ugliness that entails. In the way so many films from the 80s operate on dream logic or paralogic, this type of movie is a code for a mind and, shorn of the context of its creation, turns into a fascinating artifact, hypnotic and practically demanding we apply our own inferences to a text which is fundamentally unreadable.

Superstarlet AD (2000) is such a film. It feels like very specific porn, while being reluctant to enter into anything explicit enough to fully qualify as porn. It's packed from end to end with gorgeously framed black and white cinema, and utterly nonsensical dialog that is compelling through its meaninglessness. "I wonder what it would have been like, if things were different," one character says. The cast is almost exclusively barely dreased or undressed burlesque performers and/or various sex workers with evocative physical performances that mix in nihilistic and dead flat delivery of dialog which detaches the human body from sexuality.

No one in the movie is defined in and of themselves, only in relation to the past or the future or to clothes or to cars or to sexuality or to control. Characters are desperate to find some sense of identity in their own history, which has all but vanished outside of few and far between burlesque films. It's the future, men have devolved somehow into barely human caveman parodies. Women have become hyperfeminine and separated into tribes by hair color. Blondes are almost extinct and no one knows how to make clothes. Everyone roams a derelict Hollywood in search of their historic film ancestors. The plot slides off the plate like a fried egg and past and present and future entangle into an endless repeating cycle of violence and escape and death. It's a unique experience.

[marcelwrites]

Saturday 3rd/Sunday 4th May, 2025. Writing at nearly 1 in the morning here.

Didn't sleep well last night. Woke up at 5 am, maybe I was too warm, or my mind was racing. I'm not certain. Took me a little while to get back to sleep. Woke up, got a coffee, did the usual dance. Thankfully the sun was out for most of the day and I got at least an hour's worth of sun. It's a simple process. You take off most of your clothes and you go outside and get some sunlight, no harsh chemicals or sunscreen, just half a litre of cold water, a pair of sunglasses, and your earbuds. Worked out hard until my shoulders burnt. My heart just wasn't in it today but I pushed myself until I couldn't really break through that exertion barrier. There was this pervasive sense that tonight was going to be a disaster. I run the bar and I'd only recently been told that A) we had live music this evening (a singer named Diana from Canada), and B) that we also had an unrelated group of 31 people coming in about half an hour after the music was supposed to end. This is problematic for a variety of reasons, and the fucking apes that own the business, in their infinite wisdom, time and time again prioritise money and profit over good sense. It's funny how once you own a business the only thing you can even think about is money, as though all creativity, fun, and common sense just prances out of your brain like showgirls heading backstage in the world's most idiotic burlesque show. Perhaps there is no common sense in business. We were understaffed and I tried to run the show as well as I possibly could. The team worked well together and we got through it in the end but I just wasn't in the mood all night. When the owner/owners walked through and then left us high and dry during the chaos, I just grit my teeth. My work mum and I looked at one another and I said, "Let's just hand our resignation in right fucking now." Some of the patrons probably thought I was being an asshole this evening but it's nothing personal. I'm merely juggling spiked balls tossed to me by the utterly incompetent and I'm just doing my best to hold the place together. Dreams of my opening my own bar fill me with some measure of comfort, and that one day, I'll get to use my 12/13 years of experience working behind the bar in my own place, somewhere with a great reputation both from our customers and from the staff that actually look forward to coming into work every day. It's the little things, hey? Nothing too grandiose. Hopefully tonight I sleep better and my perspective on things is a little rosier in the morning and throughout the day. All these frustrations (emotional, sexual, mental, etc. Pick a fucking lane) are ultimately meaningless and I think the only way out is through. Just need to double down on the combat sports and weight training, and maybe, move to a warmer fucking state!

[fandoms-are-my-friends-1321]

Dragon Ball Z Fanfic Ideas

We are starting to branch out again here when it comes to fanfic ideas. I have a couple that I’ve been thinking about the past few days, but I want to get some thoughts from people in the fandom. Keep in mind that I am only in the Android/Very Beginning of the Cell Saga right now, so my ideas are centered from what I’ve watched so far. I also have no idea when these will be written because I may jump back and try to complete old requests that I was too busy to complete before (a few JoJo one’s I know for sure). Anyway, here are the ideas!

The main one that I have for Vegeta right now is a fanfic based on the song Poison from Hazbin Hotel where the reader is either a Saiyan or maybe another alien race (if the reader is a Saiyan, Vegeta never realized that they were alive) and the reader is a perform for Frieza and his soldiers (nothing too sexual, more like burlesque dancer if anything). This leads Vegeta to try and convince Frieza to let him train the reader to be a solider and set them free.

This one is based off of Surface Pressure from Encanto (I have a thing for songs right now), where the reader feels like they can’t show their emotions and crack under the pressure, and while Vegeta tends to do the same thing, he wants to help the reader release their pent up energy

1. I also have a few ideas for Piccolo, such as a fanfic where the reader is a Saiyan training with Piccolo and helping him discover what could motivate him to become stronger, also based on the song Out for Love from Hazbin Hotel

2. A fanfic where Piccolo doesn’t think the reader will ever find him attractive because there are other strong warriors around, but the reader proves to him that he is the only one that they love. Will be based on the song Mary on a Cross by Ghost

Anyway, that’s all for now! Please let me know what you think so I can keep them in mind for later!

[ragsy]

"Olive Branch Unlimited Pasta Pass"

A less-than friendly encounter between Dogmark and Kenneth. 993 words. Read under the cut 👇

---

Mark grimaced at the jangle of the shop bell. It was ten minutes to closing; surely nobody needed taxidermy services this urgently. He was going to have to fucking sweep again, and why can't these people ever just put the dead cat in the damn freezer for the night?

He was halfway through his Customer Service Greeting-- a dry and listless "Hi, let me know if you need anything" with an implied "I hope you don't," when--

"Oh. Uh. Hi Kenneth," Mark coughed.

Kenneth, as it were, stepped into the Tucksidermy shop, taking in the many display shelves of magician squirrels, burlesque raccoons, and deer with hats, before finally catching Mark's attention. He smiled, though it did not reach his eyes. "Ah! Mark! Working hard?"

Kenneth let the shop door swing shut behind him; he held a large tupperware container tucked under one elbow, and his other hand gripped something in his pocket. For a man who had walked with a cane for as long as Mark knew him, Kenneth was moving with awfully fluid, easy strides.

Mark eyed the container with heavy suspicion. If there was someone's dearly departed family pet in there, he just might scream.

"Just. Uh. Closing up for the night," he said, setting his broom aside.

"Fantastic!" grinned the older man. "Then I hope you don't mind me asking: is Tuck in?"

Mark's pointed ears flicked.

Tuck had been different since coming back from the last mission. They hadn't told him everything that had happened, and the wedge between them and Kenneth remained vague handwaves and omissions. But still, holes in a story still leave behind the shape of some great and unspeakable thing.

And, if he was being honest, Mark was kinda creeped out by the way that guy was always so chipper. If he had more than a measly ounce of candor, he wouldn't have minded telling the old man to fuck off.

Mark slipped his glasses off and polished them on the front of his shirt.

"Tuck's not here," he lied.

Kenneth's face fell. "Oh! Are they, ah, are they alright?"

"Just-... Busy. I dunno."

This was, at least partially, the truth. The usual signs of Tuck is Working were present: Muffled FM radio pulsing through the wall. A hovering scent of blood and chemicals. A bearing in the workshop vent fan that squeaked at a frequency only dog ears could hear.

Kenneth furrowed his brow. "Oh. Hm."

That was another thing-- In the days since the mission to that facility, everyone had returned drained, bedraggled, frightened, or pissed off.

Everyone, that was, except Kenneth.

Kenneth, who Mark had seen take up jogging. Kenneth, whose familiar lines and wrinkles had begun to fade. Kenneth, whose sharpened eyes and revitalized wits now studied Mark, searching him for answers.

It all made Mark's skin crawl. Even as a grown-ass adult, he couldn't avoid feeling like a kid caught in a fib by a teacher. What the hell else was he supposed to say?Desperate for a break in eye contact, he replaced his glasses, grabbed the broom, and resumed sweeping.

Kenneth cleared his throat.

"Well, then, in any case, can I leave this here?" He was hoisting the container aloft in both hands. At Mark's skeptical stare at the plastic lid, he cracked open a corner, revealing a mess of pasta, tomatoes, and cheese.

Kenneth mistook Mark's sigh of relief for gratitude.

"Lasagna. I thought you both might appreciate some leftovers from dinner at Alice's house last night. So-- Ah, so sorry you had to miss it again!" The smile returned to his face. Uneasy. Apologetic.

Sorry. Right. Maybe they stayed home for a reason. Maybe they didn't want to be there with him. Maybe Tuck would have gone if he would just get rid of that fucking tape recorder. Mark's fingers twitched. Maybe he could take it from him the hard way.

He bit his tongue and swallowed his words.

"Um. Great," he said finally. He set down the broom and picked up the dustpan, dumping its contents unceremoniously in the trash.

"Ah," said Kenneth, crestfallen. Heavy silence fell over the two of them.

Once it was clear that Mark would make no move to accept the offering, Kenneth crossed the room and placed the container on the register counter. He patted the lid conclusively.

"Well, ah, I-... I hope you enjoy it!" A glimmer of hope clung to the edges of his words with desperation.

Once again, Mark said nothing. Folding his arms, his gaze darted from the tupperware, to the clock above it, to Kenneth. He sighed and swiped a hand down his face.

"Please go."

"Wh— Pardon?"

"We're closed."

Kenneth blinked. "O-oh, so soon?"

He swept his eyes across the shop. "Will, ah, will Tuck be back soon then, maybe?"

Mark thrust a clawed finger towards the door. "Get. Out," he growled, his human mask vaporized in an instant. A snarl curled up his snout, and his hackles bristled. Enough was enough.

The older man staggered backwards, eyes wide in terror. He raised his hands in submission and, without another word, fumbled open the door and slunk outside.

Mark slammed the shop door behind him and twisted the deadbolt shut. He glanced at the clock again. Five til was probably close enough.

Seething, he finished his chores and stalked out the back door.

Later, he rapped his knuckles on the doorframe to Tuck's workshop.

"Hey, we're all closed up now. I'm gonna get going." His voice shook a little, but he had at least managed to hide the dog back away.

Tuck looked up from its workbench. "Oh, heya Mark," it drawled. "Customers give ya any trouble today?"

"No. All good. See you tomorrow."

He hoisted the shop trash bag on his way out the door and slung it into the dumpster. It landed against the metal bottom with a heavy thud.

Kenneth's olive branch would be left there to rot until pickup day.

[stilin-ski]

meeee we should talk about burlesque dancer jace im rotating him in my mind. his sparkly costumes. BIG ostrich feather coat that he sheds to reveal a flapper outfit w the tiniest beaded fringe skirt. maybe he moved to the big city with dreams of being an actor or a singer, he was made for the stage, and well. this isnt how he planned it but it’s better than nothing. and he’s tougher than he looks, he doesnt need anyone’s protection and he certainly doesnt need to be coddled, but porter insists on it anyways because he’s too pretty for his own good.

Mmmmmm that’s gorgeous.

My particular brand of Them is like. Porter is half in love with Jace. Jace is the most gorgeous thing he’s ever laid eyes on, and Jace could have anyone who walked into the club.

And yeah they flirt back and forth. Little teasing remarks about how Porter is a so big, so strong. How he could probably throw Jace around like nothing. Porter remarks that Jace loves the attention up there, loves having everyone’s eyes on him. Loves knowing people are going home and desperately trying to get off to the memory of him clad in lace and pearls and silk and jewels.

But it’s just flirting. It hasn’t gone anywhere past that. And yeah, Porter fucking hates watching Jace lead patrons to one of the private rooms. Hates thinking someone is in there, moaning over Jace’s movements.

His only peace comes from the knowledge that patrons aren’t allowed to touch the dancers, ever. No exceptions. And he knows Jace can handle himself, but still. It makes his jaw clench and teeth grind against each other.

He has no right. Jace is an adult, he can do whatever- whoever- he wants. But Porter wants Jace to want him.

Jace wants it too, but Porter hasn’t made a move. And he’s dated men in the past who were shitty about the whole burlesque thing, and he doesn’t know how Porter feels about it. About him, dancing every night. Working as club security is one thing, but dating one of the dancers is another.

It comes to a fever pitch one night when a regular, one who spends a lot of money on Jace, throws a lot of cash at the club on a regular basis. He gets handsy with Jace, specifically in one of the private rooms. Porter hears the door slam open and sees Jace rush out, silk robe pulled tightly around him.

Porter has never seen him look so shaken, so he’s immediately rushing to him, trying to figure out what’s happening. Jace is pale, stuttering when Porter reaches him. He points in the room and Porter follows his gaze, sees the man knocked out on the floor with the room in disarray.

He calls over the walkie to have another guard get the guy out of there. If he did it, the guy would be dead. He’s end up dead, and Porter knows it.

Besides, now Jace is clinging to him, pulling him back, away from the doorway. He’s still shaking.

So Porter just nods, goes with him back to the changing rooms. Sits with Jace while he calms down. Drives him home that night, makes sure he’s settled.

Jace asks him not to leave, so he stays. Sleeps on the couch until Jace wakes up around few hours later and asks him to lay in the bed with him. They just lay there, quietly.

But it makes it easier. A few weeks later, Porter asks Jace to get dinner with him. Makes it clear, he means as a date. Not for a hook up, not as friends. A real date.

Jace says yes.

[pixie-felix]

Hi Pixie! A semi half-baked idea and a question.

So I've got "Ribbon" by Mariah Carey on repeat in my head. So guess who popped into my brain? Pretty Prince Jinnie bc we love seeing that man tied up in ribbons. But imagine trying him up temporarily because for an anniversary you prepared a special dance to that song for him. (The irony) We all know if he had his hands free and simply told not to touch her would absolutely cave 3 seconds after you got close enough. He looks wrecked once you're done so from the teasing touches and quick but deep kisses shared. I'm talking trying to take calming breaths, eyes slightly glazed over, pouty lips parted slightly, almost painfully hard in the lace shorts you bought him. But his eyes are glued to you. Have been since he was tied in/to the chair.

Do we tease him a little more with bites, kisses and hickies while slowly grinding against him until he cums? Should we go with a hand job and dirty talk as he sits there, mind fuzzing over and mostly communicating in half sentences and phrases making the prettiest noises you could hear up close? Put his pretty little mouth to use and ride his face? Give him some of the best head he's ever had and tell him he can't cum until we do? Immediately sink down on him and ride the hell out of him? Obviously all of the above is possible. He'd be so overstimulated as you just have your way with him. (This just got longer as I wrote. The demons are at work🤣)

How would the others react if you dance for them (maybe not to this song, but other sensual songs that remind you of them)? Who's blissfully surprised and might later give you a private dance of your own? Who's most to least likely to behave during your dance? (I'm so sorry this is like ten questions, but I wanna know your thoughts. BUT take your time. There's never any rush)

--🍭

I LOVE YOUR DEMONS

THE WAY I HAVE BEEN FOAMING AT THE MOUTH TO REACH THIS ASK JESUS CHRISTOPHER CHRIST

Oh.

My.

GOD.

As someone who used to be a burlesque dancer, this question SANG to me. Lmao, punny. Seriously though, for a brief period of my life I was a professional cocktease, and it was fucking awesome. And I genuinely had a routine that involved a guy being tied to a chair... What times. Hah. I was going to say thank fuck it wasn't skz and then I did the math and Chan would have been thirteen. Ew. So yes, yay, thank fuck there was no skz involved 🤣🙈

Of course now I'm daydreaming about being 19 again and being Bang Chan's hot-and-unstable noona. I want teenage Channie to have a crush on me! I mean, I want adult Chan to have a crush on me too, but that's different. Like, I want to go back in time and experience him having a crush on me in that cute way little kids and awkward teenagers do? Urgh and lmao, this has probably come out all wrong. Idc. It's written now.

*AHEM* Back to the questions.

I know we've discussed it before, *somewhere* (just wait until I've got that index finished. I'm gonna be cross referencing us left, right, and centre), but just to check...

You're keeping those ribbons loosely tied, right? So that not only are you driving him nuts with your movements (how is your body roll better than his?!), he's also going insane because he's got to keep himself still. Or suffer the consequences.

Um, did I see you mention lace shorts? Because I'm going to need a little elaboration on that 😇 How lacy are they? How short are they? Are they panties? Please tell me they're panties. Guys in lingerie... Yeah. That is definitely a topic we should discuss in great detail, when the time is right.

Okay, so I have consulted my smut playlists, yes that is a plural, and come up with the following pairings:

Chan. Chan has two options- one for Channie, and one for Christopher. Gotta love that duality.

For Christopher, easy: Scream My Name by Thomas LaRosa. Slow, sensual, with lots of build up and that ride-or-die-borderline-possessive vibes? Yes please. This was definitely not influenced by the Escape video. Bring out his protective side while he’s not allowed to move, tease him, drive him a little bit insane. 

If you want to REALLY push his buttons (of course you do), and you’re living in the poly!skz universe, get one of the other members to dance with you too. Obviously, Hyunjin would would be ideal. Again, definitely not influenced by the Escape video… If you go with this option, be prepared for revenge. Sexy, sexy revenge. (I would love to hear your thoughts on revenge.)

For Channie, (possibly definitely more my vibe because I’m a silly and mischievous goose who's totally addicted to Chan’s laugh): Pony by Giuwine. Do I even need to explain? Even if he isn’t immediately thinking of that lip sync battle (or even just Magic Mike itself) you KNOW he’s going to be cracking up. The only downside being he might laughing too much to get hard…  Lmao of course I’m lying. He was rock solid the moment you tied him to the chair, and he might be laughing but you KNOW he’s going to be throwing you down and giving you your own performance once you say the word.

Minho. Despite his poker face and tsundere personality, Minho is pleasantly surprised when you ask him to let you give him a lap dance. Whether the iconic eyebrow raise when you handcuff his hands behind him is for your benefit or his, (he's definitely pretending his dick isn’t already waking up) is up for interpretation. 

He’ll pretend to be unaffected at first, and the casual observer might not be able to tell how into it he is. But there is no way you miss the the slight narrowing of his eyes, or the tension in his jaw. Or the subtle fidgeting when his pants get too tight.

The song is Ride or Die by Jeff Satur. Does it have Drive vibes? Perhaps only lyrically, but still. He’ll appreciate the link almost as much as he appreciates the way you slip the key to his cuffs into your bra. He can fish it out with his teeth and tongue later.

Added bonus: it’s in his vocal range and now my brain is full of him quietly singing it to himself the next morning, in the kitchen while he makes you eggs. (I don’t even like eggs, but I just feel like that’s the *vibe*.)

Changbin. Choosing for Changbin was really hard, because Binnie never deserves to suffer. But of course he would like to be tortured a little bit, and we can't refuse him anything.  Obviously this needs to be a girl group song, and nothing too filthy. He is the prettiest princess after all.

So, with that in mind: Igloo by Kiss of Life. Watching the HyunLixBin cover of it was so cute. And everybody knows how much we love taking cute things and ruining them making them sexual. Take the original choreo and make it more intimate. Slower. Heck, maybe slow down the entire song.

Whatever you do, he's going to be over the fuck-mothering moon. When you sit him down in that chair. We all know those muscles aren't just for show, so EITHER make sure you tie those bonds extra tight... or use some ribbons that are so pretty he won't want to break them. Pink is always a good choice.

I nearly didn't include this song after whichever member's birthday livestream racist bullshit... but fuck them, Binnie looks so cute doing the dance, let's focusing on that instead.

Hyunjin. I’m right there with you with Ribbon, I hadn't it before but now it is his song. Straight on the Hyune playlist (I can't be the only Stay with separate playlists for each member, right? And I can't be the one who's Ayen playlist is exclusively badass bitch bangers, right?).

To pick my own Hyune track I'd defintely go with I Feel Like I’m Drowning, Two Feet (I feel like I should give a warning that this mv is quite raunchy, but then here you are, dear reader, reading our horny musings... so perhaps a warning is unnecessary?)

Other than that, I have nothing to add. Your Hyune-vision is perfect. I would like in please 🙏.

Han. No question about it: Mommae, Jay Park. Again, raunchy mv. This is Jay Park we're talking about. And you know he's seen the video, because it's iconic. And he was a teenager when it came out, so he's almost definitely beaten off to that beat before lol that's barely even a pun but it made me laugh sorry not sorry.

He was hard the moment he saw the ribbons in your hand, and on the verge of orgasm by the time you'd finished tying him to the chair with those pretty little bows. So when the music starts and he hears that iconic baseline -which naturally triggers a whole avalanche of horny teenage memories- it's no surprise that he jizzes his pants before those first nine beats are up.

By the chorus, he's already hard again, and begging you to touch him as you tease and sway around him. The question is, how long do you torture him? Making him sit in his messed up jeans, practically foaming at the mouth, tears in his eyes as he begs you to sit on his face, his thigh, his cock, his anything. I hope you tied those ribbons extra tight.

Oh, and bonus: you didn't let him undress properly because you knew this would happen, and he likes the pain of how the denim keeps his dick restrained.

Felix. Because it's fun (gotta keep it cute for Lixxie), and it's been in a bunch of reels lately: Sugar by Flo Rider. It's a bop, you know he's heard it (all those hours on tiktok), he's definitely danced to it before. Possibly in the bathroom, while he's waiting for the shower to heat up or doing a facemask. Maybe naked, once or twice.

Maybe he even took a silly little video of it for you, but chickened out of sending it after remembering you describe the time your ex sent you a two minute long video clip of him spinning a dick windmill and he doesn't want you to think of him that way.

But now here you are, dancing for him to the song he's had stuck in his head for weeks. He's a happy boy. A patient one too, obediently staying still while you straddle and grind on him, his boba eyes all big and glossy with lust as he admires you adoringly. The only hint that he's struggling to stay still? That white knuckle grip he has on his seat.

He's such a good boy, you don't tease him for long. You're barely halfway through the song when you pull on his wrist ribbons, freeing his arms enough so that he can touch you. Even freed, he stays respectful: you'll have to guide his hands to your hips yourself. After he's finished kissing you that is, whimpering into your mouth as you roll your hips against his. In time with the song, of course.

Seungmin. The bedroom eyes on this man. Jesus Christopher Christ. He might have an excellent poker face, but that slight tightening around his eyes, the barely there frown... That's when you know you've got to him. Better have tied those ribbons tight.

Getting him to agree to the whole idea of being tied to a chair in the first place will a bit of a challenge. Never one to give in easily, you'll have to pull out all the stops to get him to agree to this. Ofc, if you're living in the poly!skz universe, there's an easy hack for that: just tell him [insert member] was a good boy and let you dance for him.

Competitive Minnie mode: engaged. Dick: solid. Patience: thin.

Oh, and btw. You didn't tie those ribbons tight enough. Because when his fuse finally fizzles out, he's got you up against the wall, pinning you by the throat with his other hand in your pants before you can say "bad puppy".

Yeah, the song is Ride by SoMo, and after this night, he's going to torture you at every karaoke party you and the guys go to. This is now his song. Just like you're his girl. He won't even flinch when his hyungs and Jeongin cringe at the lyrics. You're his, and as soon as he gets you alone he's gonna take care of your body... and other quote other lyrics at you. With his dick. (Sorry, had to cool myself down with some humor because I'm still reeling from this and that. SEUNGMIN YOU WERE MY SAFE PLACE WHY DID YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT THE CAMERA LIKE THAT I AM LOST.)

Jeongin. Right, I'm gonna combine my two favourite maknae problems here and suggest Move by Taemin. Do I even need to elaborate? You wouldn't even need to move, just sit on his lap, arms around his neck, your lips just out of his reach... Tease him with your smile and your eyes rather than your words.

But of course, that song is impossible to sit still to. Your body will roll all by itself, and paired with the way Jeongin is eye fucking you... makes you bolder than usual. It's nice to see the maknae go feral.

Speaking of which, you might need to gag him. Boy has a filthy fucking mouth on him (and yes I'm still calling him boy, because you know that only gets him more and more worked up). What you gag him with is dancers choice: more ribbons? Panties? Literal bread? (again having to cool my jets with some humour goddamn I'm not even ovulating). Whatever you use, watch out. The brat bites.

Oh, and did you tie those ribbons tight enough? Baby bread has been working out a lot recently...

okay it has only taken me months to reply to this and then days to actually write it all out. I hope you see this lollipop anon 😖 and if anyone else would like to weigh in with their striptease and/or tying skz to chairs thoughts, comment or send in an ask maybe a smoke signal or somthing 🫶

[1313-hunter]

Tales from the Underworld

[Episode 5: The Crystal Jewel, Southern Underground]

NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH TALES OF THE UNDERWORLD. I WAS HERE FIRST!

HELLO HOLONET. WELCOME BACK TO TALES FROM THE UNDERWORLD.

Now broadcasting live from somewhere I absolutely do not want to be. Guess where I am?

I SAID GUESS.

Okay nobody got it right. Losers. All of ya. I’m currently holed up in the Southern Underground. Why? Because I need ammo. Specifically, one kriffing silver bullet for my slugthrower. Yep, that one, the one you possibly heard from horror tales to kill werewolves. Guess what? These babies are good enough to kill corridor ghouls (which had been roaming around my neighbourhood. Thus, my lot and I been hunting em down one by one.)

ALSO, the only place that sells it doesn’t do catalogs, doesn’t do shipping, doesn’t even have a kriffing name on the door. You gotta know someone, then know a guy that that guy owes a favour to, then show up with rhythmic knocks or whatever.

But first stop? The bar. No, no. Not just another bar. THE CRYSTAL JEWEL. The infamous bar with the edgy tagline definitely written by some teen edgelord long before the clones were decanted, “If the customers don’t kill you, the drinks will.”

Fokkin edgy mate. Before we continue, remember this: Always keep one hand on your credits and the other on your blaster. I learnt the hard way when I first came to this part of the underworld. Unless, of course, you were one of those lucky species with more than two hands - then you could punch and shoot at the same time.

Anyway, enough pleasantries. KEEP READING FOR MY VERY OWN SURVIVAL KIT!

WELCOME TO THE CRYSTAL JEWEL.

The bar sits in the heart of the Southern Underground. And no, this isn’t like Level 1313, which still has rules (and people Underworld Cops pretending to enforce them). This is the other side of the underworld. Quite literally. Cause the other hemisphere, you know?

No one gives a shit who you are. Or what you’re carrying. Smugglers. Bounty hunters. Mercs. Freelancers who’ve lost their crews. Burnouts. This place is where the galaxy’s trash comes to ferment.

Pro tip: Don’t look like easy prey.

Holster a blaster. Even if it’s fake. And if you’re not willing to fight? Pretend you are. One thing to keep in mind before entering the facility:

THE INVITE-ONLY LIE

Here’s the thing: The Crystal Jewel’s “invite only.”

What that really means is “we’ll act like you need a name, but if you show up with a gun and enough proven connection, we’ll let you in.” But if don’t have those? You’ll break in the fun way. Like me.

So, here’s how you break in to The Crystal Jewel:

STEP 1: FIND THE RIGHT ALLEY.

There’s a narrow alley tucked between a defunct data kiosk and a churro stand that definitely doesn’t use fabric colouring for the dips. Look for the brick wall with graffiti that says “DOWN WITH THE REPUBLIC” in four different languages.

STEP 2: CLIMB THE STAIRS.

There are two sets of stairs. One is kind of clean and leading towards the market, the other one is the sketchy one - go through this one. You’ll know it from the uneven stairs, barely lit, plastered with old posters of underground fights, Twi’lek burlesque shows, live sex shows (yep), missing persons. (Spoiler: not coming back.)

STEP 3: FIND THE GARAGE DOOR.

Top of the stairs, take the right corner past the crate stack and a broken speederbike that seems to take a residency in that spot. You’ll see a busted garage door. There’s a small gap beside it, just enough to squeeze through.

STEP 4: OVERRIDE THAT SHIT.

Duck through the gap and find a burnt umbre metal door. It’s locked. Of course. Again, do not come unprepared. I always carry my data/security spike. Not that expensive. It’s 1,500 credits worth of beautiful tech. Pop it into the door’s side knob. Work your magic.

STEP 5: GET IN!

Once you got it opened, get in! Make sure to close the door and remember your steps. Do not act suspicious.

What to do here? You’re probably wondering.

When you’re in a club like this, always look for the bar. That’s where you find intel. Unless you’re invited to sit on the couch. In spots like this, the bartenders are the unofficial gatekeepers. They see it all! Every dirty deal, every backroom bargain, and they knew better than to ask questions. Like the lady in the picture, she KNOWS EVERYTHING. They’re all knowing gods. Love and TIP YOUR BARTENDER. And if you play your cards right, you might just end up on the couch.

What does it mean to be invited on the couch? Listen. Black Sun owns most of the area here. So if you’re invited, there are two possibilities:

ONE: THEY WANT TO HIRE YOU.

They know your rep. They’ve seen what you’ve done. You made noise, and they’re curious. Maybe they want to cut a deal. Maybe they want you to run something. If this is you, sit down. Listen. Don’t talk unless spoken to.

And definitely don’t ask for a drink unless they offer.

TWO: YOU FUCKED UP.

Which is highly unlikely. Because if you really fucked up you’d never make it through this part of the Underworld. You’d get a body bag the moment your janky ship landed and docked.

BEFORE WE END THIS TRANSMISSION. One more thing!

TAL’S SURVIVAL TIP FOR THE SOUTHERN UNDERGROUND:

Don’t come here unless you know what you’re looking for.

Because if you don’t this place will hand you a drink, a blatant lie you wouldn’t even be able to decipher, and a blaster to the brain, and you won’t know which will end you first.

Anyway. I’m only here for the ammo. And maybe one of those fried fungus skewers if the vendor near the stairwell isn’t dead today.

TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR MORE TALES FROM THE UNDERWORLD. REMEMBER, NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH TALES OF THE UNDERWORLD!

[justmeinatree]

05 - the greatest show : the moment you’ve waited for

Summary : a group of misfits, a mysterious leader, a string of murders, and a life on the road.

previous part /// jump to pt. 1

Word Count : 3.5k

Series Masterlist

“ahh, here they all are,” harry hums, finally finding the boxcar that everyone’s seemingly chosen to gather round in tonight.

he’s ushered ladybug into the small space, the fairly large group of people sitting on a bunch of different pieces of furniture strewn around the room. they’re all speaking to each other animatedly, laughing, passing around a dark bottle filled with something fairly potent, based on the smell.

��hey,” harry hums, a bit louder than the overall buzz of mingling people, grabbing everyone’s attention, and making them turn to look over at harry and ladybug.

she grows nervous again, unsure of what they’ll all think of her, if they’ll like her, if they’ll get along with her, if they’ll welcome her. she’s made it past harry, but she’s not sure that that was the hardest part. in all honestly, a one on one conversation with him was nowhere near as bad as clara described it. but now that she’s faced with all the lovely people she’s supposed to be calling family, now that she actually has to meet everyone and make a good impression, she’s a bit tense.

“harry,” a young woman smiles, accent making her obviously italian, “who’s your friend ?” she asks, nodding towards ladybug.

“everyone, this is ladybug. she’s joining our little family. gonna be drawing caricatures of our guests. let’s all welcome her, yeah ?” he hums, patting her on the shoulder. “now, i know you’ve met clara,” he murmurs in thought.

“hi, i’m tom,” he cuts harry right off, offering ladybug a large smile, and extending his even larger hand.

she takes it, shakes it kindly, eyes flicking over tom’s frame. he really is tall. taller than she remembers from hours ago. she notes the slight chuckle from him, “m’7ft. 6inches. it’s pretty impressive the first time innit ?”

she laughs, nodding, the tense air around her seemingly deflating, as she can’t help herself but banter, “surprised you even fit in these cars.”

that manages a laugh from everyone, tom’s smile stretching wide, “s’better than curling up under a bridge.”

she giggles, nodding, “yeah, i’ll give you that one.” her eyes do linger for a moment though, because really, how many people can say they’ve been in the presence of someone so tall ? it really is a sight to take in. harry seemed fairly tall to her, but he doesn’t even reach tom’s shoulders.

and then, like the largest stroke of whiplash, she meets adriana, a lovely lady from romania, standing at only 2ft 4inches, a sight her eyes struggle to adjust to after having just laid their gaze upon tom. she can’t help but think it’s some kind of show trickery, keeping them side by side so that the overall shock factor is that much larger.

next, she meets a group of young women, not much older than her, if at all. women from all over europe. maria and vittoria from italy, louise, jeanne, and catherine from france, and marta from germany. they make up the group of burlesque dancers, if their leotards were anything to go by. 

finally, she meets jose and javier, two spanish boys that couldn’t be much older than 8, twin heads, sharing only one body. jose’s neck has been growing out of javier’s left shoulder since they were born. the complications of raising conjoined twins, with only one body mind you, was a struggle that their parents could not continue with. she learns that they were left abandoned in toddlerhood. a piece of information that was not easy to obtain seeing as they seem to love bantering and poking fun, making up riddles and playing games, not many serious sentences coming out of either of their mouths. although, really, what was she to expect ? they were so young after all.

sergey introduced himself a moment later, almost cutting off the twins, “if nobody jumps in, they’ll just keep babbling,” he laughs, getting up to shake her hand. sergey was born in russia, just a few years before her. she doesn’t seem to note any deformities just by looking at him, but she’s also not one to pry. and how could she ? s’not a good question to ask when you’re trying to make the best first impression. she does learn though, that he’s a master card dealer, and that no matter what, he will always win at any card game. 

“i love a challenge,” she giggles, noting the glint in sergey’s eyes, as he adds, “can’t wait to see you try.”

“you love when someone new comes along, don’t you ?” adriana giggles.

“love the flash of an exciting challenge that flicks through everyone, yes,” sergey smiles smirkingly. 

“we’ve all tried,” maria hums, turning her attention to ladybug, “more times than anyone can count. seriously, nobody can beat him.”

“i’d still like to try,” ladybug shrugs, “what do you do all day anyway ? when the show’s not happening, i mean.”

“lots of travel,” tom hums, patting the spot next to himself, “have a seat, don’t have to stand there all alone, join us for real.”

she furrows her eyebrows, because no she wasn’t alone, harry was right here with her. wasn’t he ?

as her gaze flicks as far back as she could without actually turning around, she notes that at some point, harry’s disappeared. he isn’t in the room at all anymore. she never heard him leave, never heard the door click, never noticed that his presence was missing. he never said goodbye, never excused himself. maybe he just needed a wee and he’ll be right back ? 

better question, why is she so caught up in the fact that harry stepped away. he didn’t owe her anything, didn’t owe her an explanation. didn’t owe any of them an explanation. so she shakes the feeling out of her body, plopping herself down between tom and clara.

“we sleep mostly during the day,” catherine hums to answer her question, french accent present but fairly subdued, “s’a bit of an adjustment at first, but you do get used to it. it’s just easier that way since we’re usually rolling down the tracks while the sun is up.”

“we do all of our set up at night time,” clara jumps in. “it’s a nice way to surprise the town with our presence in the morning. then we sleep and prepare during the day, and do our show the next night. and so on, and so on,” she chuckles. 

“it’s a lot more fun than it sounds when she lays it out like that, i promise,” louise smiles wide, significantly stronger accent than catherine. or was it jeanne ? fuck, she’s already unsure. she thinks those 6 burlesque girls will be incredibly difficult to differentiate. they all look so much alike. especially in their matching show outfits. she hasn’t really had the chance to hear them speak yet, but she’s betting it’ll be the only way to truly tell them apart. they all have brown eyes, more on the rounded side, their hair, also brown, slightly wavy and very long. honestly if it weren’t for their accents, she’d be ready to bet that they’re sextuplets. 

“oh, no, it is fun !” clara laughs, “it takes a bit of adjusting at first, like catherine mentioned, switching your days with your nights and getting used to the constant travel, never really knowing where we are.”

“gotta listen to the accents,” sergey hums, “we’re in france tonight, in case you hadn’t noticed,” he adds playfully, earning a smack to the arm from clara.

“so, how was the meeting with harry ?” clara turns her attention to ladybug, everyone sporting different levels of smirks and sympathetic eyes. “was he an asshole ? i told him to tone that shit down.”

“actually, no,” she shrugs, “he was really sweet. i don’t know what you’re talking about at all. we just had a really nice, quiet chat. he kind of seemed to feel bad for me from time to time. really wanted to help me find my talent.”

“WHAT?” “fuckin guy” “THAT’S NOT FAIR, i want a redo” “what are you ? a witch ?”

“woah, woah,” she laughs, eyes growing wide, hands coming up in surrender, as everyone starts shouting at her.

“think our little harry has a crush on someone,” sergey smirks, everyone’s attention turning to him. 

mental note, they might be a lovely bunch of respectful misfits, but they are not immune to gossip. in fact, they seem to be thriving on it right now. a little glimmer of fun and excitement in their otherwise fairly mundane lives.

adriana gasps excitedly, one of the french girls doing so as well, “it’s about time someone catches his attention. poor lad seems really lonely, doesn’t he ?”

the room buzzes with a simultaneous sad hum, a few people nodding along. marta breaks the silence, “it’s not like we haven’t all tried to make him less lonely,” she snickers playfully, suggestively, the ladies giggling along as if it was some kind of inside joke.

“c’mon love, you can’t be that blind to his charm,” sergey nudges her, “i’m not interested in men but i can say with complete certainty that harry’s absolutely gorgeous.”

she huffs out a laugh, feeling a slight blush rising to her cheeks, “well, i do have eyes.”

as people keep mingling around her, she takes a moment. a moment to absorb. a moment to appreciate. a moment to examine. a moment to come to terms with her new life. something she randomly stumbled upon. something that she joined on a whim, with the promise of family and love and belonging and caring. a judgment free zone for the rejects of the world. 

for the first time in weeks, she feels a sense of normalcy. the adrenaline of being on the run, finally at bay. fuck, when did she become so tired ? her brain feels slow, heavy almost. with the threat of danger waning, her alertedness is no longer needed, her body understands that it can sleep again.

“the first night sleepies,” vittoria giggles, catching everyone’s attention, as she nods towards ladybug. “you’ve gone quiet, the excitement is over.”

her eyes grow wide, “n-no, it’s not like that,” she stammers, feeling bad for a moment. she should be more lively with them, make a good impression and all that.

“we know,” clara smiles, patting her thigh, vittoria jumping in quickly to add, “i didn’t mean it like that. we’ve all been there, on that first night, we know exactly how you’re feeling right now. we would not be offended if you wanted to sneak off to your space and sleep. don’t have to be shy around us.”

she contemplates that for a moment, because they really all are just understanding people. they don’t sweat the small stuff, the annoying societal rules, the stupid little formalities that make you miserable. like forcing yourself to stay awake because it would be the polite thing to do. it’s a breath of fresh air really. she thinks she’ll really like it here.

“oh, okay, yeah,” she shakes her head, “i don’t have a space yet though. nobody’s shown me anything. m’not really sure where to go from here.”

“christ, did harry not explain anything ?” tom asks, shaking his head.

“probably too busy making heart eyes at her,” javier laughs, the others joining, clearly enjoying a bit of playful fun at harry’s expense.

“c’mon, i’ll show you,” clara stands with her, both of the girls waving their goodbyes at everyone, clicking the door shut behind themselves.

“it’s down this way,” clara smiles, heading down the line of cars, “it’s the last one for now, hope that’s okay. when we reach the next destination, we’ll reorder the carts, have yours up with everyone else’s.”

“it’s fine, really,” she nods, “you’ve all gone so out of your way to make me feel welcome. comfortable.”

clara stops in front of the last cart, resting her hand softly on ladybug’s shoulder, “we’re not doing anything special. and i’m sorry that your life so far has made you believe that we are. but really, we’re just showing you the same respect that we got when we first joined, the same respect we’ve been waiting to feel all our lives.”

“it’s so easy. why can’t the world be like this ?” she ponders out loud. why couldn’t harry just be the leader of the world ? seems like it would be a pretty nice place for everybody.

“the world isn’t ready for it,” clara shrugs. “or that’s what i tell myself. that maybe we just have this different way of seeing things. but one day, in the far far future, i like to believe that people will be more understanding, more caring.”

“it’s definitely a nice thought,” she nods, biting her lip, “i like to think that maybe we’re all different because we’re meant to show them something. maybe they have a lesson to learn. one that can only come from change and differences.”

at that, clara smiles, a warm loving smile, one that almost feels sister like, “m’gonna like having you around. but for now, rest,” she hums, nodding towards the door. “it isn’t much yet, just a bed and a dresser bolted to the floor. but it is yours, and you can do what you please with it. it’s always fun to pick up little things wherever we go. make it more your own with time.”

“thank you clara,” she smiles wide, reaching out to wrap her arms around clara’s shoulders. a hug quickly received and reciprocated, a promise of home, locked into the arms of her new sister. “thank you for everything.”

as they pull away from the hug, clara gives her a playful shove towards the door, “right, now go, before you make me cry.”

ladybug laughs, wrapping her hand around the door handle, taking a deep breath, before opening it. upon looking around, clara was right, it wasn’t much. but it was hers. the first time she has a space. 

she makes her way further into the small room, eyes gazing around each and every corner, her brain working tirelessly on overdrive, imagining all of the little things she wants to do with her space.

she’s not sure how long she’s been looking around, picturing brightly coloured curtains over the small window, drawings and paintings and art pieces of every kind lining the walls, trinkets from her adventures around euro-

“here.”

“fucking-“ she feels herself being jolted out of her body, startled into reality, noting harry standing in her room, holding out an envelope for her to take.

“sorry,” he murmurs quieter, eyes growing concerned for her, clearly in a state of distress, “did i scare you ?”

“christ, harry,” she puffs out between ragged breaths, hand on her chest, “how do you do that ?”

“do what ?” he asks, eyebrows furrowing, his hand dropping down to his side.

“you’re so quiet,” she exclaims. “never hear you coming or going.”

“i’m sorry,” harry laughs softly, face tilting down slightly, in a bashful way, “i’ll try to be louder for you.”

she breathes out a chuckle, shaking her head, “are you like a ghost something ?”

and at that, harry laughs louder, his turn to shake his head, “m’not a ghost, promise,” he smiles, stepping closer to her, patting her arm, as if to say, i’m very much here, “see ? m’as real as you are.”

“i’ll figure you out eventually,” she hums, raising her eyebrow, never having shied away from a challenge.

“or you could just ask,” harry smirks, raising his eyebrow right back at her.

“alright then,” she nods, “how do you do your trick ? how do you not show up in photos or in mirrors ?”

“s’something i’ve practiced for a long time,” he explains. leaving it at that. no real explanation. something that frustrates the living hell out of her.

she squints at him, nose slightly furrowed, “s’that how you answer all your questions ?”

harry takes a moment, eyes roaming her face, his heart somehow growing at the expression she holds. how was she so fuckin cute ? and why on earth does he think so ? hasn’t thought of anyone as “cute” in longer than he can remember.

“you’re feisty aren’t you ?” he giggles. actually giggles, and he wants to kick himself for it. but it’s when he sees her grow shy, gaze flicking down, blush rising on her cheeks, that’s when he really wants to kick himself.

harry’s finger tips reach out tentatively for her cheek, grazing her skin so delicately, giving her every chance to pull away if she’s uncomfortable. in contrast, he can feel her leaning into his touch, his fingertips gliding down to her jaw, to her chin, lifting her face, eyes stuck on his, “don’t ever lose that,” he murmurs.

and for a moment, they just stare at each other, his thumb softly strokes her skin, fingertips pressed under her chin. he can’t stop looking at her, and frankly he doesn’t want to. a feeling he doesn’t remember ever feeling. it wasn’t like she was going to complain, harry was breathtakingly gorgeous to look at. he was fairly pale, but really they all were, spending little to no time in the sunlight has its effects. his eyes were a piercing emerald green, chocolate curls atop his head, hair so shiny, she was dying to run her fingers through it. 

and then harry’s hand left her chin, and his eyes flicked down, and the moment was over when he remembered his reason for being here in the first place, “brought you this,” he explains, holding out the envelope for her.

“what’s this ?” she hums quietly, still not fully recovered from her little stare down, voice a bit croaky.

“whenever someone new comes along, whoever can donate a little money, does so. s’just a bit to get on your feet before your first show. get yourself some food and some drinks, maybe even a little something for your room. s’real gloomy at first,” harry emphasizes by looking around the dark cart, placing the envelope in her hand.

her eyebrows furrow, because really ? she was content with waiting, just having a roof over her head was more than enough. but then she remembers her little talk with clara, about how different things were here, and she figures it’s something she’ll be able to pass along to another new comer some time. and that will feel nice. and honestly, so does this. the fact that they all already care about her enough to donate a little bit of what they have, just to help out, is incredibly heartwarming in itself.

“wow, yeah,” she nods, a bit agape, “that’s so sweet, thank you.”

harry smiles, “s’what family’s here for,” he hums, adding, “we’ll be moving soon, probably arriving at the next destination around nightfall. will you be okay until then ? do you need anything else ?”

“no, no, you’ve all been so great already,” she sighs happily, “i’m good, don’t worry about me, i’m exhausted anyway.”

he nods, knowing all too well about the first night sleepies as they’ve all started calling it, “right, well i wont keep you,” he smiles, heading for the door, “there’s a joke to be made about beg bugs, but instead i’ll just go with, sweet dreams, little bug.”

and before she even has the time to respond, he’s gone, the door shut behind him. with a little chuckle to herself about the joke, rolling her eyes and laying in bed. in her bed. she did it, she made it. 

Part 6

……

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

tags : @daphnesutton @niallthebadboi @gorlsinmultifandoms @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @cc-horan28

[tonydaddingham]

lmao guess whos activated ✨blathering oaf mode✨ again (clue: its me)

(cut because length and spoilers, read at your own peril)

so this post got me spiralling into detective mode again and yes i know douglas suggesting it might have been war/pollution but i have certified trust issues™ and i dont believe that for one darn second

BUT

i also don't think it's a kiss. lemme explain horrifically

so i took another look at the two frames we have of The Leaked Smooch™ and the background has a lot to be desired (if you take into account that the boys are taking up most of the frame (duh), plus already fairly average quality video PLUS compression from when i captured it)

but i think we can safely rule out that The Leaked Smooch™ doesn't happen in the theatre here, mainly because even though the quality is bad, the glasses in the Smooch™ are crowley's modern ones, not the ones we saw him wear in the 1941 flashback in s1, plus his hair is differently styled... so yes can pretty confidently say this is not the kiss we are looking for

so i wanted to pinpoint what era the theatre bit is actually set in, and therefore i set about identifying the theatre in question. turns out kids that im not a good researcher (despite it literally being my job) so it took FUCKING AGES but i eventually found set photos of the boys entering a theatre, specifically the hippodrome in bo'ness:

now this was a turn-up for the books, because that's crowley's 1941 costume right??? id recognise that iconic fit anywhere. az's costume is trickier to pinpoint bc he wears the same damn thing but pretty sure this is a match to the church scene:

so we know from s1 that we have the church scene yada yada, and crowley offers aziraphale a lift home... which we know he accepts given that the s2 trailer gives us the ✨Dinner of '41✨ scene:

the other bit however to this puzzle is that there ALSO a set pic of aziraphale at the hippodrome in his magician's outfit. given the frame from the trailer where he looks like he's about to brick it going on stage, surrounded by lovely burlesque girlies and dame siân phillips in period dress, AND there were extras on the set dressed in ww2-type army uniforms, so i think it can be fairly surmised that this bit also occurs in the 40s

so my thought process is that we're getting two separate scenes (kinda) from the 40s, we have the church bit from s1 plus the Dinner of '41 scene as its own entity, but then, like

aziraphale is doing his magic act as a side hustle to this burlesque show? and crowley turns up to watch him, hiding out up in the box?

if we follow this completely made up narrative ive just come up with, aziraphale, im assuming, finishes up and gets changed into his normal clothes, and then goes up to this box to meet crowley?

to this end, i captured and slowed down the bit in the opening sequence where aziraphale and crowley (sorry douglas, not buying it) are in the box... and-

now to my eye, the motion of them in the clip looks like they are dancing? i don't have the source to hand but we've had it confirmed that a choreographer was brought into s2, not impossible az would go up to meet crowley after his magic act, whilst there's still something going on on the stage, and the two end up dancing or something? and az bless his heart gets spooked from that?

im reasonably convinced that this might be the origin of the 'you go too fast for me' line - something happens and ultimately aziraphale gets spooked given that he's only just realised he has Feelings for crowley, and so my boy fucking legs it (a lil post i made a while ago about this exact scenario if you'd care to peruse)

other thing to note:

there is a figure that is lurking behind aziraphale and crowley in the box, which looks like it moves specifically in sync with crowley, so it could be a shadow, or someone/thing is in the box that they aren't aware of 👀 so maybe this thing (?) witnesses it all? whatever went down in the box?

so in my addled feral mind, ive come up with a speculation that even as im breathing life into it sounds unhinged and so implausible it's hilarious -

i put to you, members of the jury, that something was meant to happen in that box, and it didn't... that something being that crowley makes a move of some kind - kiss, dance, hug, declaration, WHATEVER - and aziraphale was meant to accept it/reciprocate/idk, but didn't.

and that fucks with the plan, and for lack of better terminology creates a nexus event (lmao thanks loki) which in turns starts screwing with other events, somewhat like i theorised in this post here tehe

are aziraphale and crowley, essentially, the earth's endgame? idk about u but ive read enough angst fics to know that it's not inconceivable that crowley and aziraphale's mere existence may have been part of god's plan to represent free will on earth, defend humankind, and give balance and meaning to it

so what would happen if aziraphale essentially rejected that? did the most human thing possible and resisted the plan? idk i feel at this point i am just writing a fic and this will all be ludicrously incorrect bUT half the fun is torturing yourself over your own theories right 🙃

[zennihilation]

Escape from Rialto

Characters: Juan de Riva; Teia Cantori Words: 680 Summary: Juan made Master Assassin and was allowed a couple days to celebrate. Too bad they don't remember.

Note: I am an idiot who deleted their Tumblr. This is a repost.

9:44 Dragon - 1 Year before the Occupation 

Juan’s head was pounding and their mouth was sticky and dry. Their entire body hurt. One deep breath and they braved opening their eyes. The room was dim at least. Any amount of light would have put them right back down again.

They rolled over to get to their feet only to hear a murmur and feel a grab. Shit. SHIT. 

There were bodies everywhere and not in the way they had grown accustomed to. They were happy, apparently sleeping off a long night. Naked. The lot of them. A couple of elves. A few humans. They thought they saw a dwarf. 

Juan scowled. They had taken a couple days to go to Rialto and celebrate their hard earned promotion to Master. That was last night. They remembered bars. They remembered one burlesque club. After that, everything went blurry. 

It was fine. They were mobile in a manner of speaking. All they needed was their kit and their trousers and they would figure out the rest on the way. Logically speaking, their weapons would be kept together. Summon their blade and they should find the rest. They tried to concentrate but the hangover immediately pierced their mind, dropping their concentration. 

“Fuck!” they cursed out loud only to get the attention of one of the splayed out bodies. 

“Juan?” a soft voice asked sleepily. 

“Hey… you.” 

“Lucenzo,” the lanky human offered.

“Uh huh, where’s my stuff?” 

“Back office. They took it. Magic items can’t just be laying around while your hands are busy,” he said with a glance around the room.

Juan growled and looked for anything to cover themself while they ran downstairs, grabbing what was either a torn sheet or a tarp. At that point it was hard to tell. 

“Ahem,” he said, grabbing from a pile on the floor and tossing a pair of black leather trousers to them. “These might be better.”

Juan grinned a bit. “I’ll come back for you.” They pulled them on and wrapped the sheet around their shoulders as they ran down the stairs.

The building was quiet so the plan was to duck in, grab their stuff, and flee the city. Of course, as they burst through the door, he noticed a woman sitting at the large desk, having just finished up some administrative work for the night.

She looked them over. “You’re the mage.”

Juan froze. They had seen her once from his position far behind Viago. “Seventh Talon…”

Teia smiled sweetly at him. “That’s me. Your things are over there. Vi told me you made Master. I hope you found my staff hospitable.” 

“Vi did?” they echoed, taken aback by the familiarity of it. “Yeah. Last week. I brought coin with me.”

“From what I heard, that’s all over Rialto Bay by now. You had yourself quite the time.”  

Juan blanched. They had barely been promoted. Just waking up as they had would have been enough to get them ejected from their house on their ass. Bursting in half-naked in a sheet on the Seventh Talon… It was an egregious lack of decorum, at the very least. “He’s going to kill me.”

“He won’t. He will be furious, but it’s nothing you can’t survive.” 

“But,” they began to stammer, “I can’t even get back to Treviso.”

She took a voucher out of her desk and handed it over. “You aren’t the first one to literally lose their pants here. Consider it my congratulatory gift.”

“I.. I couldn’t possibly.”

“You don’t remember me.”

“We’ve never met. I saw you once, but that’s it.”

“No, not recently. When Viago found you. I was with him.”

“Oh? Oh! I sort of remember someone else there. I’m sorry. I was distracted at the time.”

“Trying to electrocute Viago. I remember. It was very funny.”

They smiled. “Thank you, Signora.” 

“Maker, don’t call me that. Call me Teia.”

“I can’t do that.”

“I didn’t ask. Boat leaves in a couple of hours. You should find yourself a shirt in the meantime. You can probably find one on the floor somewhere.”

Juan smiled. “Thank you, Si—Teia.”

[siflshonen]

“My official policy is that I don’t stop masturbation, but I also don’t reward it,” I told my boss in our windowless office.

All of the offices are windowless, actually. I sit by the printer in the foremost chamber of offices that spiral nautilus-like through more hallways of administrative areas and utility closets before ending in the kitchen and, you guessed it, my office. It is the central entrance and the twathole of the theatre’s staff areas. Anybody who wants to enter something that isn’t a hallway is forced to cross through my office. Then again, I must encounter them, too.

Sometimes, it seems, I have no choice but to reward masturbation because there’s nowhere to hide.

There’s a new scripted show coming up. It’s an “immersive experience”. It’s a “cocktail hour”. It’s a “burlesque show”. It has an FAQ that makes the web page three times as long as it should be. It is a massive financial risk, it is logistically challenging, it bullies out other shows because it requires the use of the entire theatre for its whole run, and frankly, it is a pain in my ass.

However, it’s laughable for me, of all people, to complain about it—it is far and away more challenging for the director, those creating the set, and especially those operating the front of house. When the front of house folks read the list of ingredients necessary for the included cocktails, I watched their faces change color as they scrolled—scrolled!—through the ingredients list for the first drink. They’ll need to make three unique ones for each of the folks in the 200+ seat theatre in the teeny weeny lobby bar.

“Dude. It’s an issue that we have to scroll just to read the ingredients for one drink,” said *NSYNC. “And this is mid-shelf stuff. Never mind stocking all these different things; this ain’t in the budget.”

The drink anecdote is a reasonable reflection of every facet of the production, but I’ll provide another one that’s not so much expensive as it is mystifying: the show has its own social media account to support the immersive experience, and to tell you the truth as the marketing person, I’m not even sure the best way to leverage the damn thing given the parameters placed on it. This is not good, as I was the only one posting on it until recently.

If the show manages to pull itself out of the hat, it’ll be something neat and novel. But for now, I don’t know what to say about it except it has given me a new distaste for immersive experiences that I did not know I had before.

For example, the most common apps and promotional platforms for experiential events basically just aim to control your ticket sales and become the ticketing platform—with a project management and promotional team attached. That’s great for an independent show that wants to travel and doesn’t have an established operation, but it makes absolutely no sense at all for an established operation. Netflix cannibalized television and movies, but I guess it’s enlightening to know that the model of a subscription-based whatever (in this case, marketing and sales) effectively trying to take the rights of one’s production can extend to experimental live shows and events. I realize that what I just wrote can describe any CRM or monthly subscription-based service, but it just stings all the more to see it in action.

The director and the performers are all sweethearts. Everyone wants the show to succeed. But hoo boy does it just seem, well, masturbatory. With luck it’ll still make somebody feel good.

[piedpiperslists]

Seokjin One Shots (XXXI)

* s - contains smut

A Thousand Centuries by @thedefinitionofbts wc~5k / soulmates au

Of the Sol by @floralseokjin s wc~13.3k / dragon!Seokjin Summary: A runaway, you’re not accustomed to the way the kind village that took you in live their life—worshipping and celebrating the dragons’ descendants. A story you only ever thought was legend, is that of real life, and you’ve fallen in love with one of this century’s dragon kin. The baker’s son, Kim Seokjin. Or alternatively, Seokjin is hiding a gold dragon dick under all that clothing…

Club Zombie by @floralseokjin s wc~17.1k / mafia boss!Seokjin, zombie!Seokjin Summary: In a world overrun by zombies, you’d think everyone was a goner, but the reality is much different. A steady diet of brains lets a zombie exist as a fully functioning human. Just ignore the part where they’re technically dead… In fact, these days, the amount of zombies outweigh the humans. A lot jump at the chance to be turned. Beg for it. Kim Seokjin controls the underground of Seoul. No one would dare cross him. That’s how most of the world goes these days. You wouldn’t want to get on the wrong side of a zombie now, would you? However, you don’t quite see it like that. Spending most nights dancing at the club he owns, you catch his eye. It’s never the wrong side if you’re underneath him, right…?

Time Fades Away by @floralseokjin s wc~6k / PWP Summary: Seokjin wants to play…

Epiphany by @floralseokjin wc~6.4k / angst, exes au Summary: Sometimes it’s best to remember the past is just a memory…

Almost, Always by @namfinessed wc~6.2k / strangers to lovers Summary: How much of life will pass you by without loving anyone? Or a fic in which you yearn and yearn and yearn for life and Seokjin.

Three’s Perfect by @ragingcravings s wc~4.4k / ft JHS, FWB, idol au, neighbors au, PWP Summary: All she has to do is give them a look and they know exactly what she needs.

Lost & Found by @jincherie wc~9.1k / friends to lovers, selkie au Summary: How were you supposed to know that beautiful sealskin coat you picked up on the beach belonged to none other than your friend Kim Seokjin, the most beautiful man alive and the keeper of your heart?

Say So by @jincherie s wc~24.5k / ft KNJ, musician!Seokjin, musician!Namjoon, burlesque dancer!reader, childhood friends to lovers, 1950s au, polyamory au Summary: Returning to your hometown for a week is something you’ve managed to avoid for three years, but when you can finally put it off no longer you find upon arrival the very thing you were scared of encountering. When the two famous childhood friends you haven’t spoken to in years have returned at the same time as you, you can’t quite tell whether you’re going to be able to make it out in one piece or emerge with a heart more wounded than before. Especially since it turns out the feelings you thought you were over never quite went away.

Potion 609 by @jincherie wc~10.8k / ft PJM, friends to lovers, magic au, polyamory au Summary: A four day roadtrip into the depths of the mountains with the two best friends you’ve recently realised you have feelings for is probably the last thing you need. It becomes a reality, though, when Seokjin and Jimin bring home a cursed doll that reacts with the potion you were making and lands you all cursed yourselves; both forced to say whatever comes to mind and bound to each other. Now stuck in close quarters with your two idiot best friends who for the life of them can not shut up for the foreseeable future while you venture to fix this, you’re beginning to doubt whether you or your heart can survive this trip in one piece.

[afpwestcoast]

Aladdin Theater, Portland, OR, 12/29/23

Before the show there was a Patreon meetup at Mary’s Club, a progressive, feminist strip club. I walked in - wearing my traditional tails, bow tie, and bowler hat - to an enthusiastic young lady stripping to Coin-Operated Boy.

We were then regaled with strip routines to Map of Tasmania, Runs in the Family, and Girl Anachronism. At one point a stripper borrowed my bowler and did some very … interesting things with it. If that hat could talk, let me tell you.

Amanda arrived and performed an In My Mind singalong while the wonderful Cooper Lynn Hays performed a striptease on stage next to her, which was every bit as surreal and amazing as it sounds. One highlight was Amanda fucking up the lyrics ‘Never fucking up anything,’ which was deliciously meta. Another highlight was the tits.

Cooper told the story of how she was a country singer living in Nashville who was trying to start a burlesque outfit but found the men of Nashville to be horrible and misogynistic. She accompanied a friend to Amanda’s There Will Be No Intermission show on a whim, balled her eyes out, and met Amanda after the show and asked her how she could succeed in her burlesque ambitions amongst all the horrible men. Amanda told her, “This story isn’t about them. You don’t need them. This is your story.” And so, in a move that she described as “life changing,” she picked up and moved to Portland and is now living her best life.

She didn’t know Amanda was coming today and wasn’t even supposed to be working. Amanda had no idea about the story or the impact she had on Cooper. But, in the sort of cosmic coincidence that the universe tends to manifest around Amanda, they ended up performing on stage together.

So THAT happened.

As amazing as last night was, this show was even more fun. They were still polished and professional, but added a lot more experimental and/or improvisational flourishes. They also mixed up the set list quite a bit, which is always fun and interesting.

Annotated Set List:

Backstabber

Good Day (Brian on guitar to start)

Gravity

My Alcoholic Friends - Amanda did a short, playful piano intro that briefly teased Girl Anachronism. Bait and switch!

Ultima Esperanza - an old fave of mine that they don’t play very often these days

Welcome to the Internet (Bo Burnham cover)

Mandy Goes to Med School (Brian on guitar and drum foot pedals to start, before shifting to drums) - Amanda added a nice “soft jazz” improvisational piano interlude in the middle.

Mrs. O - Another nice tinkling improvised intro

Amanda: “I have a question.”

Random girl in the crowd: “VAGINA!”

Amanda: “Who was … did you just say vagina? Just because? Sometimes … you should do that. Tonight’s the right time and place to do that. There’s other shows you go to where don’t … don’t do that.” Solid advice.

She then took a poll of who was at the show last night and who had never seen the Dresden Dolls before.

“Oh wow! That’s why it feels different. There’s a lot of Dresden Dolls virgins in the audience tonight. It feels different from last night. It feels like, um - it’s not BAD! - it’s not bad, but I can tell some of you are like ‘Oh this is … different.’ Different from most rock shows. We’re a weird fucking band!” #truth

Mister God

Houdini

Whakenewha

Boyfriend in a Coma - By way of introduction Amanda started with the bridge to “Live to Tell” by Madonna before segueing into the song. It worked.

Amsterdam (Jacques Brel cover) (Brian on guitar)

Another Christmas (Brian on guitar, Amanda on jingle bells … eventually) - Amanda said that this was only the second original Dresden Dolls song ever written for guitar, the first being “A Night at the Roses.” When Amanda failed to pick up the jingle bells at the usual point Brian tried to hand them to her. She stopped and said she was going to wait for the bridge. Brian said ya gotta do the bells and then led the crowd in a chant of “BELLS! BELLS! BELLS! BELLS!” Until she relented. But she hung her head and said, “Well now it feels silly.” And there it was, ladies and gentlemen, the soupçon of chaos that was missing last night. The minor flaw that makes the diamond unique and more valuable.

The Runner - This one is really growing on me.

The Nail

Sex Changes

Coin-Operated Boy

Merch commercial

(You Gotta) Fight for Your Right (To Party!) (Beastie Boys cover featuring Tilley Komorny on bass, Brian on guitar, and Amanda on drums) - I just realized that I always carefully point out what instruments everyone is playing but never mention BRIAN ON VOCALS!

Half Jack - Wonderful, long, tension-building intro.

——

Sing (Brian on guitar to start, Tilley on bass)

Girl Anachronism

Photo Gallery:

The scene of the crime.

Ready to rock!

Amanda Palmer …

… and Brian Viglione …

… the Dresden Dolls!

Amsterdam!

Another sad, depressing, goth Christmas

I’ve got drumsticks and I’m not afraid to use them!

Best drummer in the world?

Submitted without comment.

Fight for your right!

Just sing.

That’s a wrap!

Brian came out for a little crowd work after.

[anne-hathway]

Anne didn’t lie when she said she would have loved to become a Burlesque artist, “Right? there would be the perfect way to mix the mysterious of the night, music, dancing and sensuality, glam up every night. I think I would do that, maybe one of these nights we could go somewhere to enjoy of a burlesque show” the brunette said imaging all the things she could share with Eiza now that they were becoming that close. “Of course,” she nodded “it’s all about art for you. you mentioned it the other day, you love making people feel something and you are so good at it. trust me, and your power becomes much stronger than you think, and it becomes stronger here, face to face, maybe you should think about doing something in Broadway, people would love your presence on a stage like that” she assured and played with her glass a little while as she listened “but if you become a director, I would love to be directed by you, I think it could be intense… sensual” she said feeling her cheeks flushing just imagining, she knew she had to control herself, she took a sip from her mimosa and let the bubbling liquid refresh her throat a little and ease down the sensation of heat that was running through her body with every single touch or exchange they were having.

The food was exquisite, but the woman in front of her resulted even more so Anne once again forgot she was hungry before and she was now hungered by every word and every movement from the younger woman that was hypnotizing her “you have such a good taste, you are so much like me, then. I find really enjoyable these kinds of films where we have romance and erotic moments” she licked her lips after another sip while Eiza was preparing her next question, but nothing had prepared Anne for what she heard. She laughed nervously and her mind started to fly and wild thoughts started to fill her head. She cleared her throat and nervously, started to play with a lock of her dark and long hair “I was not expecting such a good question” she grinned “It allows me to play with my imagination and I apologize for how wild it can get” Anne said unapologetically too a sigh, her middle finger slowly started rubbing her glass thinking about all the possibilities and all the wishes that she had for them “Okay, only one wish? Damn, one wish is not enough for what I want to do with you… but well” Anne made a pause, her voice lowered and got deeper like if she was about to say one of her darkest secrets “one wish… I wish getting to work with you, exploring your wild side as an actor, spend hours and hours studying and preparing complex roles together, get passionate about it, feel how all your pores exhale passion for what you are doing and getting to see closely how you give your rawest performance… and even better if… well, do you remember what kind of film I’d love to do with you? something where we could explore the sexuality of two smart, intense and passionate women. I know work and pleasure should not be mixed but it would be a huge pleasure, almost erotic to see you acting and observe how you get immerse in a deep and dark character, having all kind of dark, twisted and deep scenes…that would be a whole fantasy” anne found herseld leaned forwards eiza, closer than she thought as she stared intently into her eyes and pillowed lips and then back to her dark eyes again, the older woman started to feel her body’s temperature increasing and her creative side awakening just thinking and imaging something like that, Anne moved back a little, she cleared her throat sitting properly, and exclaimed “margaritas! I think it’s time for strong margaritas and I can confess more wishes that come to my mind right now and you can tell me your craziest adventures and your secret wishes too” she winked

Eiza’s dark eyes sparkled with intrigue as Anne leaned closer, the intimate energy between them growing stronger with each shared glance and word. Anne’s answer to the alternate life question made her laugh softly, her voice warm and melodic. “Healing by day and burlesque by night? That is the most Anne Hathaway answer I could’ve imagined—and yet, somehow, it makes perfect sense. I mean, who else could balance elegance, sensuality, and spirituality so effortlessly?” she teased, her lips curving into a sly smile. As Anne turned the question back on her, Eiza tilted her head, a playful yet thoughtful look in her eyes. “Me? A top model? Well, that’s flattering, but I think I’d have ended up doing something else artistic or cultural. All my life, all I’ve ever wanted to do is tell stories. If acting hadn’t worked out, I think I would’ve found another way—maybe writing, directing, or even curating art exhibits. As long as I could weave narratives that make people feel something, I’d be happy.” Her attention shifted as Anne took her first bite of the chilaquiles, and Eiza’s heart skipped a beat at the genuine delight that spread across her face. Anne’s reaction was everything she’d hoped for. “You have no idea how relieved I am to hear that,” Eiza said with a grin, her confidence surging at Anne’s glowing praise. “Mexican food is magic, and I had to make sure you got the full experience. But honestly? Watching you enjoy it like this might be even better than eating it myself.” Eiza watched intently as Anne stood to refill their glasses. Her gaze followed Anne’s every move, the fluid grace with which she carried herself commanding Eiza’s full attention. There was something so effortlessly captivating about her—each motion deliberate, each glance charged with warmth and charisma. Eiza couldn’t help but let her thoughts linger on how stunning this woman looked, the energy between them crackling just beneath the surface. When the other girl returned, handing Eiza her mimosa, their fingers brushed briefly, and Eiza allowed herself a lingering glance before raising her glass. “Indecent Proposal, huh?” she mused, taking a sip. “That’s not boring at all. It’s bold. It’s messy. And let’s be honest, who wouldn’t be drawn in by Demi Moore and Robert Redford?” she asked with a smirk. Eiza leaned forward, resting her chin lightly on her hand as she considered Anne’s playful challenge. “Alright, you want a question no one’s asked you before? Let’s see if I can live up to your expectations.” She let the silence hang for just a moment, her dark eyes locked on Anne’s, brimming with mischief. “If I told you I could grant one wish, but it had to involve the two of us, what would you wish for—and why does it feel like you’d make it impossible for me to say no?” The corner of her mouth lifted into a slow, teasing smile, and she added, “And don’t worry, I’ll let you think it over. And please, as if you could ever be boring. And mhm, I might have a few crazy stories but I think for that, we would need something stronger than mimosas”