#the name thing is also a very good contrast with the bachelor in 2... we can assume daniil worked to stop the plague while antagonizing us | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

svtxsoju · 4 years ago

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01. crush that hangover! | dear miss soju

ღ Synopsis: College is hard. Love is even harder. Good thing the students of Mansae University can write in to Miss Soju, the campus’ very own romance advice columnist! The only problem is she’s never been in a relationship. Ever. There’s no telling what kind of chaos she may cause in the love lives of several of MU’s most eligible bachelors. Too bad no one knows who she really is! ღ Characters/Pairings: college AU! Seventeen & OC’s, Pairings TBA! ღ Genre: Romantic Comedy, Slice of Life ღ Warning(s): Mentions of alcohol, underage drinking, mentions of sex, language, bad jokes ღ Word Count: 5.0k words ღ Binu’s Note: ever stare at a selfie so long that it looks weird? ya that’s this chapter for me. there were just so many elements that i wanted to get right, but i kept changing things and now i can’t look at it anymore :c i’ll properly proofread it later, but for now enjoy!! i have some other content ima post later so i’m p excited for that hehehe anyway ya happy friday!!!

《 ⊛ Author’s Note & Credits ⊛ Disclaimer ⊛ Masterlist ⊛ 》

《 Previous ⊛ Next 》

Monday, September 2, 2019 9:05AM

This was not how Joohyun had imagined her first day at The Front. Whenever she described this moment to Jihoon, she was very clear about the way she would walk in so confidently that the senior writers would wonder why they forgot to email her an invite to their 8:30 meeting. Jihoon, who relished in raining on her parade, predicted that they wouldn’t even know her name. But she had no time for his blunt realism, because she had been living as a made-up person since June and her corporate daydreams were the only things keeping her sane. She knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but she figured that once they saw her talent, everything would be just fine.

So it’s not difficult to imagine Joohyun’s distress when she just barely stumbled into the office this morning, nursing a mind-melting hangover.

She should have known she would be a goner when the sports section interns had challenged her to a drinking game at last night’s welcome party. Her drinking partner, a small girl interning at HR, had only made it two shots in before falling asleep on her lap. For the record, she had still made sure that she was the last intern standing (although she definitely wasn’t the same bright-eyed freshman that could chug a pitcher of soju and beer just to spite Jihoon). Looking around the office, she felt a little relieved to find that the other interns were suffering just as much as her, if their slumped positions and pained groans told her anything. So much for giving a good first impression.

Joohyun was trying her best not to look like she was two steps from an early grave when she was approached by a big woman with a laptop in her arms. She awkwardly bowed her head to greet her, but the woman’s gaze never left the screen of her Macbook. “Miss… Joonyoung?”

“Oh, that’s not--”

“You’re the new advice column intern, correct?”

“Oh. Yes, that’s me, but that’s not my--”

“I’ll show you to your desk.” Without so much as a glance, the woman turned on her heel, now typing furiously on her laptop. Joohyun followed behind glumly.

This was all Jihoon’s fault.

“So, how’s your first day going?” Jihoon asked over his bowl of ramen. He flagged down the tall waiter and ordered a bowl of rice.

“Fine,” was Joohyun’s curt answer. In truth, it was far from ideal. She had watched longingly as all the other interns were assigned with their first projects, while she was left with an empty inbox. How was she supposed to write an advice column when there was no one asking her for advice? She spent most of the morning familiarizing herself with the previous entries of The Front’s dating advice column, the most recent of which dated to the newspaper’s May issue… from 1997.

When her supervisor told her to take a lunch break, she had made a beeline to meet Jihoon at the restaurant near the cafe he worked at. Now that she was sitting in front of him though, she wasn’t quite ready to confess that her dream job was much more mundane than she expected. “Hey, wasn’t this a fried chicken shop last semester?”

“That bad, huh?” Jihoon clicked his tongue. Joohyun sighed - she didn’t know why she even tried to hide anything from him when he’s known her for 12 years. He probably knew some parts of her better than she did. “Come on Joo, don’t give up on Miss Soju so easily. It’s just because you’re a little hungover. We watched The Notebook like five times this summer! What more do you need to know about true love? Do you want me to set you up on another date with that freakishly tall dude for more hands-on experience? Ah, speak of the devil!”

“Thanks, Mingyu.” Joohyun took the bowl of rice and gave the server a sweet smile, which greatly contrasted with the glare she shot at Jihoon soon after. The server, a stunning boy with jet-black hair and tanned skin, stuck his tongue out at Jihoon. She waited until Mingyu went to the other side of the restaurant to serve a rowdy group of boys to whisper-shout at Jihoon. “Can you try not to expose my identity to the whole campus before I even get the chance to write my first ever entry?”

“Ohhh, that’s why you’re sulking. No one’s sent you a letter yet so you didn’t get to do anything today,” Jihoon said. It sometimes got annoying how he could read her like she was his worn-out copy of his favorite sports manga.�� She had to admit though, he did find ways to make it worth it. Like when he said, “I might actually be able to help you with that one, if you want. I can make a little shout out for Miss Soju on my stream tonight. For a small price, of course.”

“You’re streaming tonight?” The girl perked up from poking at her noodles. Over the past three years, Jihoon had built up a cult following through Woozi’s Universe, a Twitch stream where he shared music made by the underground artists on campus (including him). He only ever released new music on Mondays, so tonight would definitely have a large viewership. Joohyun immediately went into her business pose lest she show how eager she really was. “Well, what would you like in exchange, Mr. Lee?”

“I merely request that you pay for my lunch today, Ms. So,” he replied. Joohyun looked in horror at Jihoon, a petite man who ate like he was three boys going through puberty; today alone he had had an extra-large bowl of ramen, three orders of rice, and two cans of Coke.

Then, she imagined facing an empty inbox for the rest of the week. Yup, this was definitely worth it. That didn’t stop her from making a show of taking out her wallet, taking care to sigh extra loudly. She had to give Jihoon his moment to revel in his triumphs, otherwise he would get grumpy.

Jihoon cackled giddily. “Pleasure doing business with you as always, Ms. So.”

“Pretty sure my hangover is coming back.”

“Oh shit, shut up!” Jihoon suddenly yelped and ducked underneath the table.

“What the hell, Jih--”

“No, don’t say my name! He might hear you and then I’ll have to talk to him,” Jihoon whispered, jerking his head towards a bright yellow blur skipping to the back of the restaurant. “He’s one of my fans. He found out I worked at the cafe and now he keeps coming in to talk to about how sad his sex life is.”

Joohyun pursed her lips and peeked a glance over. He had joined the table of rowdy boys. “Hmm, maybe I should say hi... he seems like a potential Miss Soju reader.”

“Just pay the check already, woman!”

The new interns at The Front were not the only students sporting hangovers that day. This can only be expected of the second week back at MU. Sunday night had been the explosive finale of a full week of department welcome parties, happy reunions, and lots and lots of alcohol. Some of the incoming freshmen were convinced that Mansae University was not actually a school, but a training ground for surviving as many shots of soju as physically possible. That is until they woke up on Monday morning and still had to drag themselves to their 9AM’s, suddenly faced with the reality of what college really was: an endless cycle of perpetual hangovers and school work that’s due way too soon.

This was all good news for the new ramen shop on campus, which had been serving the hoards of hungover zombies since 10AM. Vernon, who was in great pain from the night before, had been ambushed by his roommate after his morning class. He was brought to the restaurant under the pretense of curing his woes with a bowl of warm soup and noodles. When he caught sight of a man in red waiting for them at a back table though, he immediately knew what was actually coming.

“Hello Vernonnie,” Seungcheol greeted him with a sly smile. “Care to take a seat next to me?”

“Uh, not really,” Vernon mumbled, but he sat down anyway. He scrunched his nose at his roommate as the boy slumped into the seat in front of him. “Traitor.”

“Sorry babe, Seungcheol hyung promised me free lunch. Also, you’re one to talk, after you abandoned me to fend for myself last night--! Ugh,” his roommate, Seungkwan, clutched at his head, where a rusty hammer persistently tapped away at his temple. “Hyung, why did you do this to me? My face is gonna be bloated for the rest of the week. I have an audition in two days, you know!”

“Hey, I did ask you if you were sure you wanted-- what was that you ordered? Oh yeah-- ‘the strongest drink that is legal to serve in South Korea’!” Seungcheol said, his eyes wide. As he got more defensive, he began to point his finger excessively at Seungkwan. “And what was it all for? To impress your new crush?”

“I am way too hungover to get lectured by a couple of hypocrites,” Seungkwan grumbled. “I was trying to get some inspiration, you know, a drunken spark of genius! How else am I supposed to figure out how to confess to them?”

“Okay, I wasn’t actually asking,” Seungcheol ignored Seungkwan’s offended gasp in favor of turning his attention to a fidgeting Vernon. His cherry red lips now returned to its wide grin. “I am here to discuss where our dearest Vernon went off to last night.”

“Um.” Vernon answered with a nervous smile. “I just went home early--”

“Bullshit!” Seungkwan looked absolutely scandalized. “It wasn’t enough to abandon me, so now you’re lying too? I don’t know if I can take much more of this!”

Vernon had only officially known Seungkwan for two whole weeks, but with the way the two had been inseparable since move-in day, everyone at the freshmen dorms had assumed that they had known each other for years and years. He knew that someone like Boo Seungkwan was a rare find as far as random dorm assignments went, and that not everyone was so lucky to have a roommate that reminds them to eat real food once in a while or a friend who’s willing to take care of them when they get their first real hangover. Just for that day alone, Vernon knew that Seungkwan deserved to know where he went. Plus he shared a room with him, so it’s not like he could hide anything anyway.

Seungcheol shook his head and slung an arm around Vernon’s shoulder. His grip wasn’t tight but firm enough that Vernon knew he was trapped there until he confessed the truth. “Look, I don’t need any details! I just wanted to make sure that you’re staying safe and all that junk. Also, I would like to know what base you got to.” He erupted into a fit of giggles, but soon cleared his throat to return to his investigation. “Really though, tell us what happened.”

It wasn’t like Vernon didn’t want to tell Seungcheol either. Vernon’s and Seungcheol’s families had known each other since the two boys were in middle and high school, and when he found out that Seungcheol would be a senior at Mansae University that year, he felt some of his nerves ease up about moving out. Seungcheol had always been like an older brother to him, and was always there when he needed his help in high school. He trusted him!

That’s probably why he subconsciously blamed Seungcheol for the pain he was going through at the moment. When the upperclassman had offered to sneak Vernon and Seungkwan into a party at the karaoke bar that he bartended at, the two freshmen all too eagerly accepted without thinking of any consequences. They had received no pointers, no words of caution. How were they supposed to know that bar parties were completely different from welcome dinners? And how was Seungkwan supposed to know that downing so many cocktails within the hour wasn’t a good idea? Most importantly, how was Vernon supposed to know that he would meet someone like her there? Vernon groaned into his hands as he could no longer resist the flood of memories from the night before, and leaned into Seungcheol’s shoulder as he tried to recoil from his past self. “Hyung, it hurts too much to say out loud.”

“It’s okay buddy, take your time,” Seungcheol patted his head gently and called the tall server over. Vernon continued to let out unintelligible noises of regret while the senior ordered bowls for all three of them. “How are you even hungover right now? I only remember giving you one drink last night before you went off with--”

“I’m not hungover.”

“Oh. Then what are you?”

“An idiot,” Vernon mumbled through his fingers. “A big, cringy idiot.”

Seungkwan raised his hand, looking frantically between the two boys. “Excuse me? Did I miss the reading homework? Went off with who? Last night? What? How drunk was I?!”

“Very drunk, but that’s not why you didn’t notice Vernon’s new friend. You were a little occupied with your own conquest,” Seungcheol stage-whispered from across the table. “Honestly, you two are wild. It’s only two weeks into fall semester and you’re already out here simping.”

“Um, and? I saw you making googly eyes at several ladies last night!” The higher Seungkwan’s voice rose, the harder the rusty hammer banged inside his head. “Ow.”

“Those were just my friends who happened to be ladies! Sorry that my eyes are just naturally soft and alluring,” Seungcheol said, batting his long, dark lashes at the boy. “What were her eyes like, Vernon? I only noticed that she had a nose ring. Couldn’t really see her properly while you two were ‘talking’ in the corner...”

“The corner! A nose ring!” Seungkwan repeated and clutched at his chest. “Tell me more.”

“We were just talking!” Vernon finally spoke, his face stuck in an embarrassed grimace. “There’s not really much more to tell. I just know that she’s the coolest girl I’ve ever met and I’ll never meet anyone like her again.”

“What! You two were talking for like two hours! And I saw you leaving with her!” Seungcheol said a little too loudly for Vernon’s liking. The server gingerly approached their table with their orders, setting the bowls down as quickly as possible before rushing away. Vernon noted to give him a big tip when they left. “Don’t tell us that’s all.”

“I just dropped her off at her apartment and went back to the dorms,” Vernon confirmed to Seungcheol’s horror. “I really didn’t want it to be just last night.”

“So... you asked her out?”

“No.”

“You got her number?”

“No.”

“Her Instagram? Her Twitter? Her student ID number? Do you even know her name?”

“I already said I was an idiot,” Vernon whined. “This is exactly why I didn’t want to talk about it. But yes, I did at least get her name.”

It was the only thing he could think of since he woke up. She was the only thing he could think of since he woke up. The way her eyes had lit up while they talked about her major. The way her lips had curved into a clever smile when she told a joke. The way her small hand had fit in his as they walked to her apartment. Then, he would remember how he completely fucked it all up before he started, and his headache would return full-force.

“Dude.” Seungcheol fixed him with a stern stare, but it was kind of hard to take him seriously when his mouth was full of noodles. “Have you never asked a girl out before?”

“You know I have! I don’t know what happened either, okay? I guess I just froze up when she looked at me… then I just went home after telling her good night.”

Seungcheol feigned a gag. “Gross. I was joking earlier, but you’re an actual simp. Hate to break it to you like this.”

“I think it’s sweet,” Seungkwan piped up from where he comfortably rested his head on the table.

“That’s nice, Seungkwan, but ‘sweet’ isn’t gonna get either of you laid,” Seungcheol chuckled. “Vernon, your girl was clearly waiting for you to make the next move. Trust me, girls don’t just ask anyone to walk them home.”

“I didn’t want to look like a creep!” Vernon sullenly stared down at his untouched bowl of noodles. “What am I supposed to do now, hyung?”

“Yeah, lend us your wisdom, O Alluring One,” Seungkwan chanted. “You clearly have plenty of experience from the past three years.

“Like I said, I just have a lot of friends,” Seungcheol shrugged, then suddenly checked the time on his phone. “Oh shit-- speaking of friends, I have to meet one for a study session at her apartment in 15 minutes.”

“Sounds nasty.”

“Your mom’s nasty,” Seungcheol retorted with a provocative smile. “Get your mind out of the gutter, Boo! Then maybe you’d be able to think of how to confess.”

“Uncalled for!”

He placed several bills on the table and checked his phone again. “This should be enough to cover lunch, kiddos. I wish I could help you two, but I’m booked for the rest of the day. And the week.”

“But what if I meet her again?” Vernon asked desperately.

“Then text me! I might not reply right away though. I’ve got two classes later and then I have dinner plans--”

“Another girl I presume--”

“Shut up! I also have to go to the gym before doing… uh, doing a thing. And then I have a shift at 24H.” Seungcheol stood up and looked at the distressed boys before him, his soft eyes more affectionate than alluring. Was he like this as a freshman? He reached over to ruffle the freshmans' heads. “You two should probably leave soon, too. I’ll see y’all later!”

And just like that, Seungcheol was gone, and Vernon was once again left without any advice from the senior. Vernon was never one for dramatics, but his personal failures felt like a gray cloud of shame hanging over him. He began to worry that he was just gonna have to live like this forever, because nothing in the world was bright enough to break through his doom and gloom (well, her smile probably could, but Vernon was never going to see that again). The fact that Seungkwan seemed like he was about to Train to Busan his ass any minute now didn’t really lift his spirits either.

Lucky for him, the universe was not going to let him give up so easily. At that moment, a boy with glaringly yellow hair and a heavy camera on his shoulder bursted through the entrance. His smile brightened when he spotted the two boys in the back and he didn’t hesitate to bound towards them, skipping right past the server welcoming him in. “Seungkwan! I knew I’d find you here.”

“Dearest Vernon, it seems we have been joined by the lovely Soonyoung hyung. Perhaps he might know the medicine we require to ease our ailments in love,” Seungkwan suddenly stood up, all signs of his hangover expertly hidden. He smiled directly into the camera lens. “Hyung, would you kindly share your wisdom with us lowly freshmen? Pray tell, how does one woo the object of their affection?”

Vernon, who was well-acquainted with Seungkwan’s antics by then, watched on in silent amusement. If anything could distract him from his internal turmoil for a moment, it was Seungkwan; even if he was just spewing nonsense. What really made him crack up though, was the way Soonyoung (that was his name, right?) was clearly trying very hard to suppress his giggles. “Um,” Soonyoung managed to cut in breathlessly. “You know I’m not rolling, right? Also, I didn’t understand any of the words that just left your mouth, but it definitely felt like you were putting some sort of ancient curse on me. Hi, I’m Soonyoung by the way!”

Vernon introduced himself and shook Soonyoung’s hand. Seungkwan could only sigh in exasperation at Soonyoung’s lack of culture (not that he was surprised of course). The boy apparently thought it was a good fashion choice to leave his apartment wearing a tiger print button-up. “I was asking if you could help us out with confessing to our crushes,” Seungkwan said with a roll of his eyes.

“Ohh, that’s what you said!” Soonyoung laughed until he was keeled over, clutching his stomach. Vernon and Seungkwan could only watch him with great expectation. When the boy finally caught his breath and wiped the sweat from his brow, he gave the boys a very serious look. “Yeah, I haven’t gotten any since January. So you should probably ask someone else.”

This also did not surprise Seungkwan.

“Excuse me?” The tall server approached them again, clearly giving them his best ‘I hate working in retail’ smile. “If y’all are done eating, could you please leave? You’re disturbing the other customers.”

“I’m eating, I’m eating!” Soonyoung smiled until his cheeks reached his eyes, a power move that he saves for occasions where he found himself in trouble, which happened more often than he’d care to admit. Once the server let them be, muttering something about not getting paid enough, Soonyoung turned his killing smile onto the two boys. “Can I have some of this? I can Venmo y’all later, I’m pretty broke right now.”

Vernon pushed his uneaten ramen towards Soonyoung, who looked at him as if he was the sun itself. The boy carefully set down his film camera and immediately began slurping away. Vernon nodded his head towards the contraption and asked why he was carrying it around.

“Oh, I rented it before coming to find Seungkwan. I’m thinking about making him the subject of my film project this semester, since the theater program is pretty buzzed that he’s joining this year!” Soonyoung patted the camera affectionately.

“‘Thinking about?’ I thought I was your final choice!” Seungkwan blurted. The ramen he had for lunch seemed to have finally restored some of his strength, because he no longer clutched at his temple when his voice rose.

“I said ‘most likely’ choice! I just want to keep my options open,” Soonyoung responded with great care. He didn’t want to hurt Seungkwan’s feelings, but he was definitely re-evaluating alternate subjects at the moment. “It’s only the second week!”

“This is why you’re single,” the theater major said in a huff. “Lack of commitment!”

“Hey! I am perfectly capable of commitment. It’s the girls that don’t want to commit, ” Soonyoung said in a small voice, and looked off into the distance wistfully. “I really hope Woozi does put out a new song tonight. Maybe he’ll tweet something soon.”

“Woozi? Who’s that?” Vernon asked. At this point, he was just looking for anything that would fend off his memories, which lingered at the edges of his mind and waited for moments of silence to bring him another fresh glass of cringe. He was pretty sure that he had experienced well above the recommended daily serving.

“Oh, he’s a Twitch streamer from MU! I was actually gonna say if you two are really struggling in the love department, you should definitely check out his stream tonight.” Soonyoung nearly wiggled with enthusiasm. “He usually promotes songs from artists around the area, but his self-composed songs are my personal favorites. They’ve been what’s getting me through this dry spell, honestly.��

“Oh, that sounds pretty cool.” It sounded like it was right up Vernon’s alley, actually.

Soonyoung nodded. “You listen to them and you just feel hopeful to find the kind of love he sings about. I’ll send you the link later!”

“Underground artists? No thanks, I think I’ll stick to Eva Noblezada,” Seungkwan scoffed. “I don’t really think a stranger can help me with my problems. They don’t even know me.”

“Oh come on, Kwan. Let’s just give it a shot!”

Even after all his grumbling, Seungkwan still sat beside Vernon at one of the desks in their dorm later that night. They had opened the link Soonyoung had sent them, and munched on some snacks while they waited for the stream to start up. Vernon waited with baited breath for his distraction to begin; he had spent most of the day attempting to wall off any thoughts of her or last night, but it was kind of difficult to think of anything else when all of his professors only droned on and on about quizzes and homework.

When a boy with fair skin and burgundy hair came into frame, he nearly sighed in relief. The streamer appeared to be sitting in a small, dark office only illuminated by his computer screen and several pink neon signs that hung on the walls. Vernon could recognize the faint outlines of several guitars and a keyboard behind him. The boy clicked around for a while as more people joined the stream before finally waving into the camera.

“Hi guys, welcome in! Thanks for joining Woozi’s Universe. If you’re new here, I’m Woozi and I like to write songs sometimes. If you’re an old subscriber, I’m really sorry for the long wait. I’ve been working on a lot of projects, doing some collabs - I’ll actually be releasing one of those collabs tonight and I’m really excited for you guys to hear it. If you have any new songs you want to listen to together, go ahead and leave them in the chat!”

As soon as the stream started flowing, Vernon immediately knew why Soonyoung gave Woozi such rave reviews. The guy just had good vibes and he definitely knew his music. Vernon was hooked. Even Seungkwan, try as he might to look disinterested, couldn’t help bopping his head occasionally.

“Thanks for the subscription @chweinggum! You just helped me reach my tenth new sub for tonight, and you guys know what that means. Time for the new song! It was really fun to write this with my collaborator, so we really hope you like it!”

After spending the past hour just vibing in Woozi’s Universe, discovering new songs and artists, Vernon had really hyped himself up to hear the streamer’s personal work. If Soonyoung’s words were true, this would be the song that would truly heal his heartache, the song that would push him to forget about the whole ordeal. He listened in anticipation as pleasant harmonies played through his laptop speakers. But as the song progressed, Vernon did not quite feel the reprieve he was hoping for. In fact, he was kind of taken aback. The lyrics… felt like they told his story. Maybe not word for word, but enough to make Vernon stare at the laptop screen with his mouth open. What kind of hocus pocus, That’s So Raven, mind reading shit was this? The song broke down the walls he had tried to build throughout the day and left him vulnerable to its strangely upbeat and energetic tune.

He had to admit that he didn’t hate it. The cringe from his own actions did not disappear, but the song helped him focus more on the moments that made his heart flutter, the moments that incited those pesky butterflies in his stomach. They were the moments that made him so hard on himself in the first place and the reasons why it hurt so much that he messed up. She had made him feel seen. She had done everything right. And all he wanted to do was to show her that he saw her too. He just had to figure out how.

Woozi clapped his hands loudly when the song came to an end, bringing Vernon out of his deep reverie. “And that was Pretty U by yours truly! I collaborated on it with an artist who doesn’t want to be named as of now, so I’ll just say it was great to work with such a talented person and I hope to work with them again soon! Anyway, we know the lyrics are pretty cheesy, but let’s just say it’s based on a juvenile romance! I tried capturing that giddy feeling of liking someone and wanting to tell them pretty words but losing confidence at the last second. I’m sure we’ve all been there before.”

Vernon sat up, nodding his head as if Woozi could see him. After his song scanned his soul like that, Vernon figured it wasn’t impossible.

“I know that some of my subscribers listen to me because they go through these kinds of hardships. But I wanted to say that my songs can’t fix everything. Even I go through it sometimes and I need someone to lean on. There’s actually a new thing I just found out about from a friend - ‘Dear Miss Soju’. It’s a column that they’re gonna start publishing on The Front’s website, and you can anonymously write in all your burning questions about love, relationships, or sex. So if you’re having a hard time confessing like in this song, just know that there’s someone out there to help you out!

“Since you’ll be anonymous, you can write about your heart’s deepest desires, even if it’s a little freaky. Yes, I’m talking to you, user @callmesoon, please stop trying to tell me about your sex life. Anyway, I’ll put the email in the description for anyone that’s interested!” Woozi paused to laugh at several of the comments. “No guys, The Front does not sponsor me. But I can tell you about a company that does sponsor me. Hello Fresh--”

Seungkwan closed the laptop and sighed. “Well, that didn’t help me at all. Soonyoung hyung said this Woozi guy was gonna make me feel better, but now he’s just telling us to spilll all our secrets to some other stranger. What a scam! Right, Vernon? Vernon?”

By the time Seungkwan turned to look at his friend, Vernon was already writing his second draft for his email. The boy sighed again. Maybe he could give it a shot.

The next morning, Joohyun opened up her laptop to find thirteen emails in her inbox. She smiled.

Now she could get to work.

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silenthillmutual · 5 years ago

Photo

I beg your pardon! It’s me who is going mad.

So, I know I did a Twitter thread about the ways Daniil is manipulated in Classic, and I thought I’d put it on here too.

I’m going to stop short of calling it gaslighting here though, because too many people are using that term who don’t really understand what it means. Gaslighting is specifically a form of abuse where the intention is to make the victim feel they are going insane. Not all manipulation or abuse is gaslighting - which doesn’t make it less bad, just...not gaslighting.

That being said: in Classic, there are quite a few times where Daniil can say that he thinks he’s losing his mind, and there are times when the game seems constructed to make you feel this way. Particularly I had in mind the ending of the game, and not just the part where you find out you’re a toy and always have been (that falls more under cosmic horror). What bugs me about the end and how that fits into things, is the fact that the Sand Pest and its outcomes have been chasing you - the clouds, the angels, the muggers, the firestarters, the rats, literally chasing you through houses and through town, only for all of it to completely vanish without a trace on the exact day you’re meant to give a solution to it all. I made a point on Twitter about how people attempting to gaslight you will submit you to a large amount of damage - physical, verbal, emotional, take your pick - and then remove the abuse and any signs of it just before they’re caught. it’s how they show to others that it’s you who’s the problem, not them.

Regardless of whether you think the intention is to make Daniil feel he’s losing is sanity or not, the question would be who is manipulating Daniil, and why? There are a couple answers.

The first answer is the Town. The first playthrough as the Bachelor of the game is probably the closest fitting to psychological horror as the game gets. Like Silent Hill, the Town is full of horrors that seem tailor-made to torture Daniil specifically: most of these people are uneducated (the Town doesn’t even have a school), their cultural beliefs (mostly appropriated from the steppe culture) actively prevent him from doing his job as a doctor, his word and name are constantly weaponized by people with ulterior motives, and men run around on the first two days beating women to death or burning them alive and intervening actively costs you reputation - which you need to do anything. He arrives with the hope of finding evidence to keep his lab opening and, as we later learn, keep himself from execution, only to find that both the man who would serve as this evidence and the colleague who informed you of his existence have been murdered just before your arrival. You have a lot of things riding on your success, and everything about where you are is actively working against you. The government wants you to find a cure single-handedly, but the Town has other plans for you.

And those plans are: errand boy, and scapegoat. People throughout the Town will inform you that they are scared of you when you’ve barely interacted with them, let alone in ways that should inspire fear. It doesn’t matter how good your reputation as Daniil is (and through the course of the game, there’s very little you’re made to do that lowers your reputation, and it never gets bad enough for you to be attacked on the street or refused sale from shops), what matters is the fact that everyone in Town, from the nameless NPCs to the rulers, are putting every bad thing they’ve done down as being your fault.

But the Town has another way it’s manipulating Daniil, by almost making him a member of it. I don’t think I got a screenshot, but I’m sure that somewhere along the line Daniil comments that he’s starting to talk like one of the townsfolk. You can see this happens to Andrey, too, later in the game; he talks in what Daniil calls “Griefisms”.

You have been sent here to fight an adversary that inherently cannot be beaten - in foolish hopes that a miracle would happen and your outstanding mind would stumble upon a once-in-a-million chance. And just so that you wouldn’t give up, they kept insisting that the adversary must be destroyed. Do you see how insidious the Powers That Be are? > But why? Their motives are becoming less and less comprehensible to me by the day.

The second answer is the Powers That Be.

Three people enter the Town that the Powers That Be want to get rid of: the Bachelor, the Inquisitor, and the Commander. It wants them all to fix or solve or demolish something in the town, and doesn’t really care what happens to any of them. Pathologic 2 spells it out clearer for you that Aglaya, Block, and Daniil will all be executed upon return to the Capital if their answers are not what the Powers That Be want to hear. And for the time that you are in the Town as Daniil Dankovsky, the Powers That Be - like the town itself - actively work against you. The trains that are meant to bring food and medication never, to my knowledge, arrive, and most days bring about a new letter from the Powers spelling out for you how disappointed in you and your progress they are. Some of the ways they attempt to manipulate Daniil through these letters are subtle, but most of them are unsubtle suggestions that what he’s been able to accomplish is not good enough, that he was meant to work alone.

Even one of your first letters from them is suspicious; early on in the game, they write to let you know that they are in no way responsible for the outbreak, which is an incredibly suspicious thing to say. What is the point of sending such a letter? Would the player have really thought that they were if they hadn’t suggested as much through denial? After all, what called you to Town was a letter from Isidor Burakh. But yet, the Powers That Be are the ones who leave you stranded in the Town with limited resources, no help, and constantly shifting goalposts. Aglaya makes this clear to you when she arrives: you were never supposed to be successful.

The letters from the Powers That Be do not serve any purpose other than to upset Daniil, and most if not all of them contain lies: that a train will be arriving, that they don’t mind if you have help in carrying out your plans, that Thanatica still exists, referencing conversations you’ve never had, signing drafts of letters you didn’t consult on with your name. One of the reasons i had put this down as gaslighting is because people who gaslight like to keep you off balance and emotionally fragile so that you’re easier to manipulate. You’ll do whatever they want to make the feeling stop, because you just can’t handle the stress anymore, and in the process you come across to others as unreasonable, unhinged, crazy, dangerous, so that no one will trust you. And that’s exactly how Daniil starts to come across to the townspeople: deranged, strung out, dangerous, untrustworthy.

You can contrast all that to a different letter they send you where they claim to be proud to call you one of your own. Combine the two, and you get honeymooning. They want to remind you of the good (or at least, not-as-bad) times you’ve had with them. This behavior serves two, sometimes three purposes: to keep you off balance from the violent back-and-forth, dizzying nature of what they’re doing to you, and so that you’ll defend them to people who can see what’s going on and want to get you out of it. You’ll even convince yourself that you’re not really being mistreated. If you were being abused, would they be so nice to you?

You are the last friend our family has. I hope our attachment to you doesn’t look obtrusive. > It requires too much from me. I’m not comfortable with it. > No, not at all.

The third answer is the Kains. Specifically, Georgiy and Maria repeatedly manipulate Daniil, though I’ve no doubt in the text above Victor stating their attachment to Daniil is also a manipulation, and one possibly planned by either or perhaps both of them. The text above probably looks normal, but think about the purpose it serves: to reinforce that Daniil is friendly with the Kains. Your only two options are to say that it doesn’t bother you, or to express that you feel your boundaries are being violated by their attention. But I even thinking about picking that option... Well, it feels mean.

Throughout the game, people will comment on Maria’s attachment to you and what they feel is your predestination to be romantically paired with her. All this, despite the fact that you don’t really interact with her that much. I’ve seen this be explained as forced heterosexuality, but I think it also is a way of the Kains manipulating Daniil into doing what they want. Daniil gets upset whenever people cry; when children cry, he tries to calm them and fix whatever’s upset them - there’s an entire sidequest after the army arrives in which Daniil kills a group of soldiers, spurred into action by upset children. Whenever he encounters Maria crying, he reacts with discomfort, and she uses these tears and upset to manipulate Daniil into thinking Aglaya has lied to him, effectively distancing him from one of the only people in the game with a rational mind to show him support and tell him the truth. I don’t think the two are in any way unconnected. Something abusers, manipulators, gaslighters love to do is isolate you so that you only have one source of information to go to. If they cut you off from other people, they can continue to feed off of you. You’ll never have a chance to question if what you’re being told about yourself or others is correct, you’ll just be a constant supply of drama for them.

DANIIL: Was there any particularly notable backstory? I’m deadly tired of all these people. They’re inhuman. They tell the future, believe in walking zombies, and die in all manners of painfully abnormal ways.

AGLAYA: Your line of thinking is obviously fallacious - and I was implying something rather mundane. I promise you no one can really tell the future around here and neither are deaths inspired by third parties uncommon. Mysterious phenomenons do occur here sometimes... but hardly more often than anywhere else.

You can see, first, the effect all this has had on Daniil, how dispiriting the past several days have been to him. But you can also see here exactly why a family that prides itself on multi-generational reincarnation and manipulation through “fortune-telling” wants to keep its blunt instrument in the dark.

That is, ultimately, why they are manipulating Daniil. Georgiy knows full well when he tells Daniil at the beginning that everyone, even himself, will lie to Daniil, that being that honest upfront is more likely to lead Daniil to trusting him. They want to sway him to their cause; this is why you are told that your success here depends on the wellbeing of the people Maria considers useful: herself, her father and uncle - who she gets out of the way later on to come into her power, the architects of the Polyhedron - which she will use to ascend to power, and the theatre director who has pledged himself to be her loyal servant. Eva’s on the list, too, but her inclusion was deliberately set up to make you depend on the Kains later in the game, considering that it’s Maria who convinced her to commit suicide:

DANIIL: Why did Eva die then? AGLAYA: I have a distinct suspicion she was made to die. DANIIL: By whom? AGLAYA: One of the Kains. I’d even go so far as to claim that they may have performed human sacrifice.

It’s a two-for-one deal: try in vain to make a Focus of the Cathedral, and remove from Daniil the last piece of influence who was not totally in love with Maria. Maria “cries” and is “upset” at you for thinking Eva’s death is her fault, but no one directly tells you Maria is responsible - all Aglaya does is tell you the Kains are at fault. The rest is just you remembering how nasty Maria was about Eva at the beginning of the game. I wouldn’t even say that Maria was removing a rival for Daniil’s affection. She really does only view Daniil as an object: if you speak to her on day 12, she assumes that you’re leaving, and doesn’t even ask you to stay (for kicks, contrast this with either ending of Pathologic 2 when you speak to Daniil as Artemy, where he’s supposed to be your rival. what was all that about Maria being in love with you...?); he’s not even present in his own ending cutscene. Even Mark Immortell says you’re leaving -

And actually, that’s a really fascinating conversation you can have with him on day 12. It’s where the game outright admits exactly what Aglaya told you: it’s all fake. Maria cannot really see the future, you’ve just been manipulated the entire game to achieve someone else’s goals, and unless you’ve gone around and saved Artemy’s or Clara’s bound, it’s too late for you to turn back and make a different decision. If you’ve picked Daniil’s ending, you just destroyed an entire town on the basis of outright lies.

#icarus.txt #pathologic meta #ok to rb #plato plays pathologic #nori writes #pathologic spoilers #stu don't look #long post #icarus.docx #mine

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santoteez · 5 years ago

Text

Inferno - An Ateez Seven Deadly Sins Series (Pride)

Idol(S): Ateez

Genre: Demon!Ateez, Smut(eventually)

Part to this series: 2

Warnings: Mentions of murder, details of murder, smut, femdom, facesitting, mentions of death, assault, foul language (Sorry if I forget any! It’s a long chapter I wrote over the course of a week)

Note: This series does NOT reflect any member of Ateez or their personality realistically. This is pure fiction.

Word Count: 6,867

I’M POSTING THIS DURING RAMADAN SO I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD SAY THIS IS NOT SAFE FOR RAMADAN. PLEASE REFRAIN FROM READING AT THIS TIME (OR AT ALL) AND RAMADAN MUBARAK!

Hongjoong and the boys all gathered at the side of the office where a large armoire stood tall in the center.

“Pride, once I open the portal, just jump through and you will land in New York City. Once your feet hit the ground, time will start ticking, so make sure to keep tabs on the days.” Hongjoong said, preparing the opening process.

“Do I need to take anything with me? Just the file?” Pride asked.

“Just the file. When you arrive, you’ll have everything you need on your person. Things like groceries and toiletries can be bought once you’re there. Don’t fret if she’s apprehensive at first, I gave you a challenge for a reason. Sarina doesn’t just warm up to anyone.”

“Joong, I can get her. You don’t have to worry. After all, it’s me.” He remarked, adjusting his jacket.

“Show off.” Envy rolled his eyes.

“Who wouldn’t show off all this?” Pride asked.

“I need silence.” Hongjoong said sternly. He approached the armoire, raising his hand in front of him. He spoke, eyes shut tightly.

“Due to the nature of this task, I hereby release the Deadly Sin Pride from the depths of hell for the next seven days. On the eve of the seventh day, he is to return with his assignment. It is for this reason I will open the threshold separating the two worlds.”

The armoire doors swung open, an electrifying blue ring of light erupting from the center.

“Pride, good luck once again, and do not disappoint me.”

Pride nodded, giving the rest of his brothers a nod goodbye and walked through the portal. The light flashed, enveloping him and the armoire doors slammed shut promptly after he walked through.

“Welp, he’s gone. What now?” Sloth asked.

Hongjoong shrugged. “We wait. I’ll check on him on the 3rd day, so you’re all free to join me when that happens. Until then, he’s on his own.”

Pride felt the sensation of freefalling until his boots hit hardwood. He looked around to see he was standing in a fully furnished condominium. File still in tote, he flipped through the pages.

Name: Sarina Thomas

Age: 21

Occupation: Bartender at the Bluemist Lounge

Relationship Status: Single

Family: Mother, 2 younger siblings; Relationship nonexistent, Father deceased

Likes: Art, body modifications, trying new foods, drinking, fucking, occasional smoking

Dislikes: Men, love, fragile masculinity

Kinks: Femdom, Rigger, Ballbusting, Humiliation, Praise, Degradation, etc.

Pride squinted as the list of kinks went on and on. Hates men, huh? No wonder she was his assignment. It takes someone who’s sure of himself to get past that. He realized his pockets felt heavier, remembering Hongjoong’s talk about everything he needed would be on his person.

He dug through them, finding a set of keys, presumably from the apartment he’s in. A wallet, with various credit cards in them and an ID, all of which said the same name.

Jeong Yunho

He grimaced at the name, memories of his past life flooding back. The nerdiness and glasses, the low self-esteem, the bullying, the constant badgering, the night he snapped.

The wallet had some cash in it, along with the pins to the cards inside. The keys had a keychain with the address to the condo: 1 Park Place.

He moved to the kitchen. It was empty but fully furnished with a fridge and appliances. Pride, or Yunho as he now had to refer to himself as, figured he’d wasted enough time looking around. It was time to find his target and see what he was working with.

It was dark outside as he exited the building, the phone he found in his back pocket stated 11:30. If he left now, he’d make it to the lounge just in time for the ambiance to pick up, when people tend to move to the dancefloor, and leave the bartender alone.

He plugged in the name of the lounge into Google and decided to catch a cab. He paid the cabbie and got off 15 minutes later, paying the fee at the door and slipping past the sweaty, dancing bodies heading straight for the bar.

There she was, wiping down glasses. Her large crown of curls adorned her face like a mane. She had a nose piercing and tattoos peppered along her chestnut arms. She had on a sleeveless shirt with slashes down the front and high waisted jeans. Yunho made it to the bar, settling onto an empty stool.

“Got room for one more customer?” He asked.

Sarina looked him up and down, observing his crisp white button-down and black slacks. He shirt was slightly unbuttoned, and his tie was hanging loosely around his neck.

“What fortune 500 company office did you stumble out of?” She asked, putting the glasses away. “We’re pretty far away from Wall St.”

Yunho furrowed his eyebrows. He wasn’t sure what Wall St was, but it sounded like she thought he was a businessman. Was it the clothes?

“None, actually. I don’t have an office.” He said truthfully. “My line of work is...unorthodox.”

“Oh? Enlighten me, then.” She said, taking out a clean glass. “Also, what can I get you?”

“Jack Daniels, please. Honey.” He watched her reach for a bottle in the rack behind her. “I guess you can say I’m in charge of…very valuable shipments.”

“Valuable? Like diamonds and shit?” She asked, sliding the glass towards him. “Card, please. All cards are held as agreement to pay your tab.”

Yunho nodded, reaching for his wallet. Pulling out a black card, he slid it across the table. “Yeah, diamonds are possible. Usually whatever the boss says.”

“Someone like you, that walks like he shits roses, isn’t his own boss?”

Yunho shrugged. “What’s wrong with being the right-hand man? Besides, the boss never gets to have fun.”

“Really? What kind of fun do you have?” She asked, pouring herself a glass of Jack Daniels as well.

“Going back and forth with beautiful women is always fun.”

Sarina rolled her eyes. “Figured you’d say that. Listen, if you think I’m going to get flustered and dance into your bed, you can take that idea and shove it up your-”

Yunho put his hand up, stopping her before she went any further. “I don’t think any of that. You said it yourself, I think highly of myself. If I were trying to just fuck you, I would’ve said that a while ago. Don’t get so defensive. I’m an angel.” He smirked, taking a sip of his drink.

Sarina shook her head. “Something tells me that’s a lie.”

She had no idea how right she was.

Yunho and Sarina talked back and forth up until closing, but not before exchanging numbers. Yunho even waited with her until her Uber arrived. He made a mental note to download the app. He made his way back to the condo, showering and getting into bed in just a pair of boxers. After texting Sloth through an app he found on the phone, he decided to call it a night.

He woke up around noon. Realizing he didn’t have any groceries, he decided to get dressed and go shopping. Remembering what Sarina said, he checked to see if the closet had any clothes besides his suit he always wore back home. Opening the closet, he saw all kinds of clothing. Jeans, shorts, tees and hoodies in his size. Considering it was kind of hot when he went out last night, he opted for a black and white striped tee with jeans. He found some white converse on the floor and put those on too. His hair had fully air dried from his shower, so he left it as it was. Grabbing his keys and wallet, he headed out, googling the closest supermarket.

He took a cart from the entrance and made his way through the aisles, picking up random things. It was mainly things he could microwave or boil quickly; he wasn’t much of a cooker. While trying to decide on a soda, he noticed a familiar set of arms reaching for a bottle of juice on the top shelf. Yunho watched as she cutely jumped, but the bottle was just too high up.

Yunho came up behind her. “I got it.” He said, lowering the bottle to her reach.

Sarina sighed. “Thanks, but I never asked for he-” She paused, seeing who it is. “Hey, I know you. You stalking me?”

Yunho smiled. “I guess I should’ve led with my name last night. I’m Yunho.”

“Yunho, I’m Sarina. Everyone calls me Rina.” She said, and Yunho had to nod like he didn’t already know. “What brings you around here?”

“Well, I have zero groceries so I had to stock up.”

Sarina glanced at his cart. “Looks like you don’t own a stove either. What’s with all the microwaveables?”

Yunho smiled. “I’m not the best cook so, this is what I’m working with.”

Sarina shook her head. “Men.”

“You could come over and teach me a thing or two? Make sure I don’t burn down my kitchen?”

“Come into a man’s bachelor pad by myself? You’re asking me for a lot, Yunho.”

“Understood. A random guy walks up to your bar, strikes up conversation then pops up on you in the juice aisle of Whole Foods, and invites you to his house. For all you know I could be some serial killer that wants to skin you alive. I expect a self-assured woman like yourself to be cautious at all times. But I can assure you, I just want to know you.”

“Why me?” Sarina asked, observing his outfit. A sharp contrast from last night. Maybe not Fortune 500 after all.

“Why not? I just got to town and I can tell you’re the most intriguing one here.”

“Just got to town? From where?” She asked.

“From…down south.” Yunho quipped.

“Like Texas?” She cocked her head to the side.

“Something like that.” Yunho reached for a bottle of Sprite, placing it in the cart.

“Your answers are so clipped. You’re like a mystery.”

“Maybe if you came over, you’d be able to peel back some layers.” He answered, looking at the snacks.

“You don’t quit, do you? What do I get if I go?” Sarina taunted.

“You get to spend time with an amazing guy.”

“You’re very prideful, you know?”

“You have no idea.” Yunho pursed his lips. “So, is that a yes?”

Sarina contemplated. “That is an ‘I’ll take a chance on you.’” She said, turning her cart around to walk in the same direction as Yunho.

While online, Sarina noticed Yunho had a lot of stuff. “Did you bring a shopping cart?”

“Nope, I can carry it. It’s not too far.”

She stared incredulously. “You can put the frozen things and the soda in my cart. Don’t break your back trying to be a macho man.”

They walked back to Yunho’s building and made it to his apartment.

“For someone who does shipping, you live pretty lavish. I can tell your company ain’t no FedEx.” She walked into the kitchen. “Wow, when you said your kitchen was empty you weren’t kidding. How recently did you move?”

“Pretty recent, I’ve just been ordering food. I finally went shopping since I feel like I’m gaining weight.”

“That’s what you look like when you’re gaining weight? I’m jealous. Well, we don’t have all day so let’s get cooking!”

They spent the whole afternoon together, cooking, eating, and having fun. Yunho found out Sarina’s family doesn’t talk to her because she’s blamed for her father’s death. Common drunk trait: Oversharing.

“I had just gotten off the phone with him; it was a really nasty argument. So, he decided to drive over to my apartment. This was around the time I was in bartending school, and I lived nearby campus. He wasn’t obeying the laws of the road. Rammed straight into an 18-wheeler. Died on impact.”

“And your mom thinks that’s your fault?”

“Basically. Says that had I not argued with him or gotten him agitated he wouldn’t have been on the road that night and he’d still be here. After the funeral, she said she never wanted to see me again. That to her, I died when he did.”

Yunho sighed. This wasn’t something he missed about being a human. Whether it was Lust upsetting a girl in town by stringing her along, or Greed stealing from the neighbors for the fifth time that week, in Inferno you either fessed up to what you did or Hongjoong made you. And in the end, no one felt guilty. Not just because they were demons, but because Inferno was a shameless environment. You didn’t fear guilt because you were already expected to behave like shit.

“I hope you know that’s bullshit,” Yunho said, continuing when she just shrugged. “Everything happens for a reason. What I say next might be insensitive but had he not passed away that day, or even if you had not argued that day, death is inevitable. It would have found him eventually. And that’s not on you.” He said, taking a swig of cognac.

“What about you?”

Yunho rested his head in his palm. “What about me?”

“I feel like you’ve gotten to know so much about me, but I know nothing about you.”

“What do you want to know?”

“Something. Anything. Your story.”

Yunho sighed. “Well, I can say that growing up, I wasn’t always this confident or sure of myself.”

“How come?”

“I was a dorky little kid, brown hair, and glasses. Kept to myself and stuttered a lot, so I was the butt of the jokes. My books in the toilet, spitballs, punching, kicking, shoving. The whole package. I lived in a small town in North Carolina, and there weren’t many options to go to school, so the bullying continued all through junior year of high school.”

“What happened senior year?”

Yunho hesitated, not wanting to admit what really happened. He had already said too much. “I moved to the city. Continued my education there. Met my boss there, began entry-level in the company, errands, and shit. Made my way to right-hand man.” He shrugged, pouring himself another glass.

“Well, I’m glad you were able to overcome that. It takes strong people to come out on the other side of harassment. I’m proud of you.” Sarina smiled. “It’s so weird, I just met you less than 24 hours ago, but I feel so drawn to you. It’s like a magnet is pulling me your way.”

“Be careful talking to me that way,” Yunho muttered, his voice dropping slightly. “I’m still a man, after all.”

Sarina rolled her eyes. “That wasn’t meant for you to take that way. Be a gentleman, Yunho.”

After cleaning up, it was time for Sarina to go. She still had all her groceries with her, after all. Yunho walked her back to her building, agreeing for her to come over to his place before her shift. On his walk back, he heard a ding from his phone.

It was a message from Hongjoong. “Be up early tomorrow. Your brothers and I will video chat you in the morning. Need to know your 3-day progress.”

Yunho chuckled. “Okay, mom.” He texted back, before resuming his walk back. He went straight to bed, knowing Hongjoong would call at the crack of dawn.

Yunho’s phone woke him up at 6:00am. Suddenly, his brothers all popped up on his screen.

“Hi, Pride!” Sloth beamed.

Yunho smiled. “Hey, Sloth. How’s it going?”

“Boring. No one else hangs with me down here.”

“What’s so great about hanging out with Pride? I hung out with you last night!” Envy said.

“You sat in my room for 15 minutes and complained about all the things you want but can’t have.” Sloth said.

Envy rolled his eyes. “High standards.” He muttered.

“Yunho, how are things going with Sarina?” Hongjoong asked.

“I think it’s going great. We hung out yesterday, and she’s coming over again today. Then, from here we’ll head to her job. At this rate, I should be able to talk to her about the mission in a couple of days.”

Hongjoong nodded. “That’s what I like to hear. I believe you will complete your tasks with no errors. Take notes, gentlemen. Trust is essential in the process.”

“Rooting for you, Pride!” Gluttony asked bowl of cereal in tote.

Gluttony, I thought we agreed you wouldn’t eat breakfast during the call.” Hongjoong stated, exasperated.

“What breakfast? This is a snack!” Gluttony emphasized.

Hongjoong sighed. “Pride, before you go, I should warn you. When the time is right for you to tell Sarina the truth, your representative color will glow from your chest. This is basically a warning that if you don’t take the opportunity, your success rate drops by at least 50%. So, if you glow, start talking. The same will happen for each of you, so keep it in mind when your time comes. Pride, don’t screw this up. And most importantly, when she asks, tell her everything. I’ll see you when you get back.”

After a collective “Bye, Pride!” from the council, the call ended. Yunho fell into a deep sleep shortly after. He got up from bed a couple hours later, stretching his arms to the sky. He poured himself a bowl of cereal, checking the time. It was half-past 11, Sarina should be on her way soon. He showered after eating, changing into some fresh clothes. An hour later, there was no sign of her so he decided to cook some rice and chicken, the same way she taught him so they’d have something to eat when she did pop up. Time stretched along and still no sign of Sarina. He texted her, letting her know he was waiting. Perhaps she forgot?

More time past and Yunho got worried. It was almost time for her shift to start, and she still had not shown up. Glancing at his phone, he saw she never opened his text either. Checking the file, there were no other places she frequented besides her house, work, and the supermarket, especially at this hour. So, either something happened, or she was avoiding him.

Slipping on his shoes and grabbing his keys, he headed out of the house. He reached the curbside and stuck his arm out.

“TAXI!”

He tossed the guy a twenty and stormed into the club, completely ignoring the bouncer. He scanned the room, full of people enjoying happy hour. No sign of Sarina. Instead, the bartender was an older guy, probably early 30s. Yunho slammed his hands down onto the counter.

“Where is she?” He asked.

“Where’s who?” The guy asked although he seemed to know exactly what Yunho meant.

“Sarina.”

The guy shrugged. “Not here. She doesn’t live here, you know.” He chuckled. “Why? You got a crush?” He laughed again, halting abruptly when he saw a glint of purple in his brown eyes.

“Well, if you see her, tell her I’m worried and I came looking for her,” Yunho said sweetly, sarcasm clear in his voice. He turned around and walked out of the establishment.

He didn’t see the bartender text, “He just left.”

Defeated, he headed back to his apartment, figuring it was best to just let her rock for the night and check on her again in the morning. It’s not like they were dating, right? Maybe he was just being paranoid.

Sighing as he entered the house, he removed his jacket before locking the door.

“AH!” He groaned as he felt a sharp pain in his right shoulder blade. Looking over, he saw a butcher knife lodged into his back. He furrowed his eyebrows. Was he being robbed?

“Who the fuck are you?” A hostile voice said.

“Sarina?” Yunho asked, walking into the living room.

“Don’t come any closer, I have more knives.” She said, backing up.

Yunho reached back, pulling the knife out of his back with a grunt. He threw it on the floor. “What are you talking about? I told you. I’m Yunho.”

“I figured you would say that.” Sarina balled up a paper and tossed it at him. “16-year old Jeong Yunho found guilty on several counts of premeditated murder in the first degree in a courtroom in Northampton, NC. Jeong’s victims were found lifeless in their homes with multiple lacerations and acid burns to their skulls, torsos, and legs. The arms of his victims were never found, but it is speculated he broke them before severing-”

“OKAY. Okay, I get it. Enough.” Yunho raised his arm.

“Don’t upset me more. Before I give you another gash.” She warned.

Yunho scoffed, taking his shirt off and showing her his clean, unscathed back. “What gash?”

She blinked in disbelief. “That’s impossible. That was in your back! You pulled it out!”

“Sarina, just let me explain…”

“No! This doesn’t make any sense. This article says you were sixteen in 1990. It’s 2020.”

Yunho’s chest, as if on cue, began to glow a vivid purple. The light shone brightly from his chest, illuminating the entire room. Then, just as quick as it had shone, it diminished into nothing.

“This just keeps getting even weirder. Did you just fucking glow?”

“Alright, Sarina. Listen closely because I’m going to answer your questions. In my childhood, I was bullied for the smallest of reasons. My family wasn’t as well-off as the rest of the town, with my father being the local garbage man, struggling to make ends meet. For the most part, I put up with the taunting, name-calling, having food thrown at me, drinks dumped on me. But the last straw was Daisy Krasdale. Daisy moved to town junior year. I was excited. Finally, someone who didn’t know me since I was in diapers; someone who didn’t see me as just the garbage man’s son. She actually spoke to me nicely, walked the halls with me, wasn’t embarrassed to call me her friend, sat with me in class, and lunch. I finally had someone on my side.” He smiled, reminiscing. “Until Johnny, my main bully ruined it. I was getting ready to head to the movies with Daisy, it was the first time I’d ever go. No one ever wanted to go with me, and I didn’t have the balls to go alone. I was heading out the door when I found a cassette on my doorstep. It was labeled ‘She’s not coming, loser.’ Something told me to take it upstairs and watch it, so I did. It was a sextape. Johnny and Daisy, in bed together. She was screaming for him, while he kept telling her to ‘forget that loser.’ We can both guess who the loser was. At that point, I had had enough. The only person who made me feel seen. Just ripped away from me by some bully. That was the day I changed my focus.” Yunho moved to the couch, taking a seat. “You can sit, you know.” He said to Sarina.

“Thanks, I’ll stand. Just keep going.” She shifted her weight.

Yunho shrugged. “Okay. Well, that day, I actually went to see the movie. Alone. House Party, I’m sure you’ve heard of it. It was-what was the word back then? Bitchin’. So, the next week, I went to school like normal. I didn’t talk to Daisy, no matter how many times she tried apologizing. She claimed it was a moment of weakness. I thought she was full of shit. So, I went to school, went home, then went into the basement and conjured up my own homemade hydrofluoric acid. It’s a very easy recipe, Though I’m sure you wouldn’t want to know the details. I produced gallons of it. Stored it under the stairs until Friday. I stayed in my room until 8pm, feigning a stomachache so my mother would leave me alone. She was a sweet woman, married incredibly too young. Anyways, I waited until she had gone to bed to sneak back out. My dad worked early mornings, so he always slept early. I loaded my concoction into my dad’s truck and made it to my first victim’s house. Ritchie Clark, Johnny’s best friend. Well, more like minion. Did everything he asked. He was in his room, studying. I made my way into his bedroom, shoving a bag over his head. It’s funny how quick the tough guys go soft when defenseless. I dragged him out of his house and into the back of the truck. The next guy was Max Turner, and the way I captured him was vaguely similar, but the best part? Johnny. He had just fucked another girl he wouldn’t call back and taken a shower. I was waiting for him behind his bedroom door when he came back in. I bashed him in the head with a wooden bat, before bagging and loading him up too. To this day, I don’t remember how I got all three of them out of the houses that easily. Perhaps I was too delirious to even realize someone did see me. I drove them out to the docks. No one was ever out there at that time of night, so it was the perfect place. I dragged them all out to the pier, removing their bags. They immediately became furious when they saw who it was. Calling me all sorts of insults and shouting threats, until they saw the ginormous canister I had next to me. I made sure to put my gloves on before splashing Johnny on the foot, his skin sizzling upon contact. He screamed into the night, the pier immediately smelling of human flesh. I’ll spare you the details that weren’t in that article, but yes, I burned them to a crisp, created dozens of lacerations and severings. Then, I disposed of their arms, went home, showered, and got into bed.”

“Yunho, where did you put their arms? No one’s ever found them.” Sarina asked, wanting to run but couldn’t move.

“Really? All that info and that’s your question? Well, does it really matter now? It’s been 30 years. And I haven’t even told you the best part. The next morning, Northampton was in for the shock of their lives when three young bodies were found by the water, burned beyond recognition. They began asking around to see who were the last people the boys hung out with were, trying to create a timeline. Of course, I was never thought of. We weren’t even friends. Until it clicked. Who would want these boys dead more than the kid whose life they made impossible? They did a comparison of the tires of my dad’s truck to the tracks found at the pier and sure enough, they were a match. The police stormed into my room, expecting me to be standing there with an assault rifle or something. I was just having a burger with fries my mom made. They read me my rights, blah blah blah. I didn’t deny it. Didn’t flinch, didn’t cry. I just asked to be able to finish my burger. They didn’t have anything like it where I was going. I was taken to the local precinct awaiting trial, where I was tried as an adult and sentenced to death. I spent the next five years on death row in a maximum-security facility. My case was highly televised, so inmates knew of me and left me alone for the most part. It was the most peace I had felt in my life. They questioned me for years over those damn limbs. Bribing me with the chance to get off of death row if I helped them. Bunch of pigs, all of them. They thought I’d help them after all my reports of assault and harassment fell on silent ears? I told them to go fuck themselves. So, they pushed up my execution date.”

“So, how did you escape?” Sarina asked, her hand still tightly gripping the knife in her bag.

“That’s the thing, Sarina. I didn’t. Two days before my 22nd birthday, I was strapped to a chair, in front of a room full of people. The families of the deceased, my parents, random kids I went to school with, and Daisy. Sweet, friendly, foolish Daisy. She mouthed ‘Why?’ to me as I was executed by lethal injection.”

“Yunho, listen to yourself. You’re crazy. How can you sit there and tell me you were executed when you’re sitting right in front of me?”

“You really don’t get it, do you? What pissed the town off so much wasn’t that I killed those guys. It was the fact I didn’t regret it. Not once did I feel shame or remorse for what I had done. In fact, I was proud of myself. I laughed as I felt the poison infiltrate my veins. I woke up in this really hot place. For a second I thought I dreamt the whole execution and was shipped off to Texas. Until a guy picked me up off the floor, took me to his house, bathed and fed me, and gave me a new name.” Yunho stood up, walking towards Sarina. His eyes glowed purple like his chest, and his veins lit up like a motherboard.

“I’m Deadly Sin Pride, the Fiend of excessive self-confidence.”

“Yunho, I said stay AWAY,” Sarina said, piercing him with the knife in her hand. She lodged it into his left pec.

“Ouch. That would hurt if there was still a heart there.” Yunho pulled the knife out and, just like before, the wound closed up, leaving no mark.

“What the fuck?”

“NOW do you believe me? If I had wanted to kill you, don’t you think I would’ve already done that? Why go to your job, get to know you, invite you to my house, by yourself, for hours? Harming you was never my intention.”

“Then why? Why go through all this trouble?”

Yunho sighed, his eyes softening back into the dark brown Sarina was used to. “I’ve been assigned a mission.”

“To do what?”

To take you back home with me.”

“So, your brother, who’s literally the ruler of hell, sent you back to Earth to get me, bring me back to hell, in order to help the imbalance of the sexes?”

“Pretty much, yeah.” Yunho shrugged. After hearing him out, Sarina decided to stay. Despite hearing all he had done, she realized he wasn’t the same guy as before, and that he acted out based on circumstances. She may not agree with it, but she can look past it considering how long it had been, and technically, he paid for his crime.

“But I’d never be able to see my family again.”

“Not to literally play devil’s advocate, but you’re on Earth right now, and you don’t see your family.”

Sarina rolled her eyes. “You know what I meant.” She pondered it. “If you complete two conditions, I’ll go.”

“Which are?” Yunho asked.

“The first one,” Sarina said, leaning into him, “You let me dom you.”

“Dom? Like in sex?”

She rolled her eyes. “Yes, in sex, stupid. You’re so full of yourself, so calm and collected, I wanna see you lose control just once.”

Yunho sighed. Well, if it meant getting his mission completed, he could let her take the reins.

“Okay.”

So this is how Yunho found himself in Sarina’s bed, tied to the headboard, wearing nothing but a blindfold and a cock cage, panting heavily.

Sarina climbed on top of him, kissing him, her kisses leading down to his neck and chest. Yunho groaned as he began to harden, his cock feeling the restraints of the cage.

Sarina climbed up further, her thighs on each side of his face as she lowered herself gently. Yunho’s lips found her clit expertly, devouring her pussy with fervor.

“Mmm, you have no idea how many times I’ve imagined this. You underneath me, tied to the bed, with a face full of pussy.” She said, grinding onto his face as her eyes rolled to the back of her head.

Yunho wanted so badly to reach out and grab her, but she tied him up so well he was unable to budge. He alternated from circling her clit to sliding his tongue deep inside, keeping her on edge. Sarina’s fingers weaved into his hair, tugging slightly, causing Yunho to moan. The closer Sarina got to orgasm, the harder Yunho got and the more restraint was put on his penis.

Sarina’s legs started to twitch, her hips stuttering. “Shit, baby. Stick out your tongue.”

Yunho obeyed, and Sarina bucked her hips against the wet muscle, lost in her arousal. Sarina panted heavily, “Yunho, I’m gonna cum.”

“Cum on my face,” Yunho said, his voice muffled by the current predicament.

Sarina’s eyes bolted shut, her knuckles going pale from gripping the headboard. All her actions halted suddenly, her body spazzing as she gasped loudly. “Oh shit, shit, shit.”

She groaned when Yunho continued sucking, causing her sensitivity.

She slid back down, kissing Yunho again. “You did so well, baby. I think you deserve a reward.” She smiled so mischievously, Yunho pondered if she was the deadly sin in this pairing.

He gasped as she removed the cock cage, his cock springing loose and growing harder sans restraints.

“Shit…” He muttered as he felt Sarina take him into her mouth, the lack of sight only heightening his other senses. Sarina bobbed her head at a steady pace, finding her rhythm. She gripped in her hand what couldn’t fit into her mouth.

She sped up as she heard his groans increase. The room filled with Yunho’s pants and the obscene slurping noises from Sarina. She edged him on until she felt his cock twitch. She released his member with a pop!

“Mmm, Baby, don’t cum yet. We haven’t finished.” She said sweetly. Positioning herself on his cock, she slid down, sighing as he stretched her open. They both moaned as they bottomed out. Once she was adjusted, she bounced up and down, the temperature in her body rising as she neared her next orgasm.

“Fuck, you feel so good, Yunho. I’m gonna cum.”

“Rina. I wanna see you.”

Pausing momentarily, Sarina took off the blindfold. Meeting his gaze, she saw how fucked out he looked, and she could only imagine she looked the same. She decided to untie him too, only to be flipped the minute he was cut loose.

Sarina was now pinned to the bed, her thighs in a tight death grip by Yunho, who was hammering into her mercilessly, his head in the crook of her neck.

“You’re so fucking tight, baby. I can tell you’re about to cum. Cum for me, I know you want to.” He said, reaching between their bodies to rub the sensitive bud.

Sarina’s back arched as her mouth fell open, her whole body shaking like a washing machine. Her orgasm triggered Yunho’s, who pulled out just in time to cum onto her stomach. Ropes of white essence painted her stomach like a mosaic. There was silence for a while, both parties catching their breaths.

“You just couldn’t sub the whole time, huh?” Sarina said after a while.

“Shut up, it was long enough.” He said, getting up from the bed. “One condition down. What’s next?”

“You said your mother married young, right? Well if she was as young as you said, she would still be alive. So, the last condition is that you go see your mother, granted we find her.” Sarina said, walking to the bathroom, leaving a very shocked and confused Yunho standing by the bed.

The pair stood outside of Elmhurst Senior Living, with Yunho very much not happy to be there.

“C’mon, let’s go in!” Sarina pressed.

They walked up to the reception desk, greeted by a short, young girl.

“Good Morning! How may I help you?”

“Hi! We’re looking for a resident here, Heeyoung Jeong?”

“Oh yes! Wow, she hasn’t gotten a visitor in years. She’ll be so excited!” The girl beamed. Sarina noticed Yunho wouldn’t look up, feeling guilty for the first time since he ceased being a human.

The girl led them to the elevator, handing them a map of the facility. “Keep in mind, her memory isn’t what it used to be, so it might take her some time to remember you, and don’t be discouraged if she doesn’t! She just hasn’t been the same since Mr. Jeong passed. Make sure to return the map after your stay. Enjoy!”

Sarina thanked the woman as they got on. “What are you thinking?” Sarina asked.

“My father is dead and my mother is all alone. I haven’t seen my dad, so I know he’s most likely in the upper world. Not surprised, he didn’t have a bad bone in his body.”

They arrived at their floor and headed for room 308. A small lady with white hair was sitting in a rocking chair staring out the window.

“Mrs. Jeong?” Sarina said.

The lady turned. “Yes?”

“My name is Sarina, and there’s someone here that wanted to speak to you.” She nudged Yunho.

“Hi mo- Ma’am.” He stuttered. “I was a friend of your son’s, one of the few, and I wanted to say that despite his crimes, he truly did love you. He always thought about you, and what would happen to you when he passed. He would be happy to see you so well treated. I had a few words for his father, but seeing as he’s no longer with us, I’ll just say he wanted him to know he was sorry. For everything. He felt like he failed him, but at the same time couldn’t help what he had done. His only regret was leaving you behind.”

Heeyoung nodded. “And he told you all this, while in cells?”

Yunho nodded. “In the cells, and at lunchtime. We spoke often.”

“Okay, well, thank you for your kind words. I assure you I feel much better after hearing them. Please, come give me a hug, dear.”

Yunho hesitated but eventually embraced the small woman, who whispered into his ear, “I’m old, not stupid. I love you too, son.” She pecked his cheek before pulling away. “Go back to where you came. I’ll be alright here.”

Yunho nodded, whispering “Bye, mom.”

They exited the facility and found themselves in the middle of NC.

“So, what now?” Sarina asked.

“There’s something I have to do first.”

They caught a bus to Northampton and headed for Yunho’s childhood home. It had been foreclosed and boarded up, but it was still standing.

“Come, there’s a back door.”

He and Sarina made it inside the house, which looked just as abandoned as the outside.

“Yunho, why are we here?”

“Downstairs.” He said, heading for the basement.

They make it down the stairs, and Yunho lifts a dusty tarp. Out fell decaying bones.

“They’re still here. I never told the police where they were, and neither did she.”

“A mother’s love knows no bounds?” Sarina shrugged.

Yunho and Sarina stood at the closet back in the NYC condo. Sarina had a small bag with her, while Yunho simply had the file. Yunho looked at her one last time.

“Are you sure you’re ready to go?”

She nodded. “My conditions were met, and like you said, I have nothing really going for me here. Maybe a little hell is just what I need.” She smiled.

“Okay, here we go.” Opening the closet, he pulls the lever he found in there the first day he landed. There was a spark and a portal whirred to life, so strong it caused a great wind.

“Grab my hand, and don’t let go until you feel your feet on the ground!” Yunho shouted.

Sarina nodded, holding his hand tightly. They walked through the portal, immediately descending. When their feet hit the ground, they arrived in Hongjoong’s office. Hongjoong was sitting at his desk, filing paperwork as usual. He looked up, raising an eyebrow.

“Pride, back so soon?” He asked.

Yunho nodded. “The mission is complete, brother.”

“I see. Hopefully, you weren’t forced or coerced into coming here?”

Sarina shook her head. “I wanted to come. Hoping it’s a fresh start?”

Hongjoong smiled. “Fresh starts are always welcomed here. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Hongjoong, or who the humans know me as, Dante. Welcome to Inferno. You’ll meet the rest of the Sins later, but right now I’m sure you want to rest. Pride, take her to your room then come back to the office. I will summon the council to advance to the next level of the mission.

“Brothers, see how Pride successfully completed his mission, and Sarina is now one of us. This is how it’s done. Keep in mind, you don’t have to come back in the same time Yunho did. Don’t make this a competition. Every one of these women are different and they all require different approaches. The next stage of the mission is effective immediately.” Hongjoong opened a new file. “Samiyah Harris.” He said, approaching one of the boys. “Greed, you’re up.”

“Good Luck.”

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danwhobrowses · 5 years ago

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A Personal Rant before Sword and Shield comes out

I’ve sat idly by for months, tried to weather a few negative responses but given that it’s now 6 days from release and I’m hearing that devs are getting literal death threats I’m going to put my foot down

If you’re already shitting on a game that hasn’t been released yet, you are all juvenile bitches, and I’m about to tell you why.

Before we begin, I’m not saying that you’re not allowed to dislike a game, that happens, but usually it happens after you play a game, not before.

You are viewing this game through a keyhole and judging the room and what you’re seeing is not worthy of this much hate. Let’s start with the big one Dexit: Not as Big as You Think Having No National Dex is of course not ideal, but it doesn’t ruin the game. Let’s Go has no National Dex, all it had was Alola forms and nobody whinged about it. Ruby and Sapphire didn’t have a National Dex until FRLG, and nobody whinged about it. Sun and Moon and Ultra Sun and Moon do not have a National Dex And Nobody Whinged About It Do you know why? Because it’s not actually a big deal. People who complain about it are bandwagoning because ‘Dexit’ is a meme, its name literally parodies an event in current Britain that many people don’t actually want to happen. Now currently, the anger of Dexit is that Bulbasaur and Squirtle are not in it, which frankly is hilarious because the last wave of bitching was ‘Kanto mons are getting all the new stuff’. You wanna know how many main series versions Bulbasaur and Squirtle have not been in? Seven, only way to get them is trade and event. The other complaint is that there’s ‘only 400′ Pokémon. Remember those days where people were fine with 150? 400 is huge, in fact it’s 3 less than USUM and it’s not accounting for the Gigantamax forms Don’t let headlines fool you either, Sun and Moon had 302 Pokémon, it’s far from the ‘lowest dex number since 2003′. Do your own research with these things. Kalos’ regional dex was 151, BW2 was 300, BW 153, Sinnoh 210, RSE has 386 and GSC had 252 Don’t get me wrong, it smarts that some Pokémon isn’t there, but it’s not a dealbreaker, like let’s be honest here. For a good year and a half all your pokémon are gonna do is sit in an unused cartridge or a PC box, you’re literally whining about the fact that you can’t move your perfect IV Pokémon from one box to another. You could simply just let them stay in Let’s Go or USUM, you don’t have to use Bank or Home on continued subscription for that, so your complaints are only set on the foundation that you feel like you have to continually pay to not transfer your Pokémon, Finally, people act like these Pokémon are deleted forever, they’re not, this is for spacing to make sure this game doesn’t break down from the sheer mass of models and textures it has to maintain in a massive open world space, the local and online camping and battles. Just use the Pokémon that are there! There’s new Pokémon don’t you wanna try those? You can also look at FRLG or Emerald and consider that maybe more Pokémon will get patched in once the game proves to be stable. I don’t think you’ve noticed, but the Nintendo Switch isn’t as powerful as the other consoles out there, sometimes it runs like shit. Believe me on that one, Switch is still in a very buggy development phase. Let’s Go was kept small to test it’s capability and Sword and Shield can’t just fly in and give you all 1000 Pokémon just so one of the ones you want can be in there

You have to be much less obtuse with this, I mean this was a long time coming. You’re gonna have to live with the fact that not every Pokémon ever can be supported on one game alone. Disk, Download, Cartridge and Patch Sizes have limits in Compliance, you can’t just throw everything at it. Waah, the New Pokémon Don’t Look Good They do, you’re being petty. It happens every version, the people dislike the starter evolutions or just one in particular. Remember all the Oshawott hate? This all comes and goes because people have simply gone on the first instinct that ‘new and different is scary and should be shunned’ You’re that Simpsons meme when young Homer accuses Grandpa of not being ‘with it’ I won’t spoil to those who haven’t seen it, but I like the new starters, and some of the new Pokémon will need some growing but not every Pokémon looks good at first glance. If Mr Mime, Hypno or Gastly came out nowadays they’d be crapped on so much for lacking creativity or for looking weird. Look at Drampa as well, thing looks like Falkar from The Neverending Story, when I first saw it I thought it look weird but now I like it. You should offer these things time And actually fall back on past experience, you’re reacting like this isn’t the same thing that happens every version; the dex gets leaked, people whine about the evolutions, people get over it and accept that they overreacted. hIgH QuAlItY aNiMaTiOnS I’ve seen that video, 2 clips and you judge a whole game how classy of you? If you don’t see improvement you’re blind. You can’t shit on a game for keeping the battle animations, you can’t expect every Pokémon to move their own unique way to the exact position of the body part the opponent needs to get hit by, that’s just unrealistic. You’re also failing to equate to the new moves and all the new movesets. You have to ensure that each Pokémon is capable of calling this animation as well. The second clip in that video was Hop and Hau having the same rigging, and once again, that’s not abnormal. Rigging is not easy either, do it wrong and it sticks and deforms texture. There’s nothing wrong with Hop having one animation that matches Hau’s, you’ll probably find that many models actually have similar rigging as previous games. Because it’s not that big of a deal and it saves money, as an example look at Disney they copied hand-drawn motion and stuck a different character on them, Robin Hood’s Little John dances just like (animated, for those too young to know otherwise) Jungle Book’s Baloo The thing you’re also ignoring from that clip is the graphical improvement of Hop compared to Hau, Hau looks like a balloon with a smiley face but Hop’s face has depth and his mouth actually moves like a normal person, his clothes have far more contrast and complexity, but no just zero in on one fighting animation and one rigging that’ll surely be worth abusing a game that’s not even out... B-But Charizard I’ve already explained this before but Charizard is Leon’s main, it’s obviously going to have a Gigantamax, ergo it’s also going to be in the Dex. Does Charizard get a lot? Yes, but the reason is because Charizard is popular. One of the rarest cards is a Charizard Hologram Card, Charizard is one of the first version mascots, it is one of the most recognized Pokémon Ash has in the anime Reality of the matter is that like Pikachu, Charizard is a recognized Pokémon for all ages, it appeals to a demographic that’s not playing In Layman’s Terms: that part is not for you A reality you really need to face. Pokémon is a game for all ages, so elements of the game are not always going to be tailored to your age range. The gimmick of Dynamax and Gigantamax is for merch sales and young children because it’s got an audience there, you can’t expect the Biggest Entertainment Brand in the World to simply shut out a large fraction of its demographic just to appeal 100% to you And again, it’s not a big deal, so there’s a Charizard there, just save a Stone Edge and be done with it, if you hate Charizard so much this’ll be catharsis, but in actuality you’re complaining because it’s something to complain about Kanto are getting Everything That went down like a lead balloon didn’t it? Reminder that the first Gigantamax forms were Galar Pokémon, so you can’t really say that anymore. There are Galar forms from non-Gen I Pokémon too I assure you, but the reason Kanto gets a lot of them is because Kanto is the oldest. Let’s not pretend that other gens don’t get love either Or should I remind you of Mega Ampharos, Scizor, Heracross, Houndoom, Tyranitar, Blaziken, Gardevoir, Gallade, Mawile, Aggron, Medicham, Manectric, Banette, Absol, Garchomp, Lucario, Abomasnow, Steelix, Sceptile, Marshtomp, Sableye, Sharpedo, Camerupt, Altaria, Glalie, Salamence, Metagross, Latias, Latios, Rayquaza, Lopunny, Audino and Diancie? It’s true that the Johto starters could use something, but I don’t think they’re being purposefully ignored, perhaps the right design hasn’t come along. Rather it be done right than poorly wouldn’t you agree? The Devs Should’ve Done <Insert Thing Here> People who say this kinda stuff have no idea how a game is made. I have a First Class Bachelor’s degree in Computer Gaming and Animation Technology and I can tell you that none of the stuff you want them to do is easy. Even getting grass right is a complete hassle. You want small insights you should watch Corridor Crew react to Good and Bad VFX, they tell you about the mechanics of CGI a few times on those vids. This is what annoys me with the prior swipe at the Battle animations and rigging, even with 2 years this is a heavily massive workload and Game Freak have only recently expanded the team that work on Pokémon which makes communication much more widespread and difficult to manage, likewise they are working on other games too they are not just Pokémon, currently their next IP is why Toby Fox was able to do a bit of music for Pokémon, because he’s collaborating with them on another game. The work doesn’t stop, most of these people are overworked and still doing overtime, they bring out a good product and all it gets is ‘but it should have this’, and unless it’s a huge part of the game that’s needed to function then that’s really disrespectful Before you start critiquing on what the people making this game ‘should’ve done’ perhaps you should try to make a game yourself, because it is not easy even for pros, I call back to Toby Fox because creating Undertale took 32 Months to create, that’s 2 years and 8 months for those slow with math, it also took 3 years before it could be ported to Switch because the Engine couldn’t support the platform, Pokémon has less time to do that, greater graphical and animation quality to achieve and more characters to battle, attacks to animate and more songs to compose. Conclusion: You’re All Just Bitter I’ve already seen it happen recently but this group of people senselessly bashing something because of ridiculous demands, expectations or arguments based on a lack of understanding all combine into something I’m simply calling the ‘Bitterness Fandom’. It’s people hating for the sake of hating and trying to bring something down just because it’s been a popular force for so long, and it’s not just Pokémon that’s getting it It’s already been happening to Star Wars. The Last Jedi and Solo were great films but the Bitterness sank its fangs in and act like neither are as good as the original trilogy (like killing Snoke without knowing anything about him and Phasma before she could do anything is any different to killing Sidious and Boba Fett in Jedi or Maul in Phantom Menace and Grievous in Revenge of the Sith), a lack of awareness to reality and the desire to complain for the sake of complaining continues to infect Star Wars. We even have a thing called ‘Star Wars Fatigue’ Star Wars can’t release a film every year because of ‘Fatigue’ but Marvel can release 5 MCU films a year and nobody bats an eye. Those frustrations aside, I refuse to let the Bitterness sink in without me calling them out, because you are not Pokémon Fans. If you were you’d know that having no National Dex isn’t new, you’d know that the graphics have improved and leaks of the game happen every time, you’d know why Charizard is popular and that some features are not intended to be targeted at you Shock and Horror to the heavens above but games can’t do everything And if you’re that naive to think so then you’re clearly not doing your homework So let’s throw out an absolutely WILD suggestion shall we? Let’s decide our opinion on a game After playing it? Because shitting on something you don’t even have hands-on experience with it is a fragile pedestal to put yourself on. If we all think it’s bad then, so be it, but I sincerely doubt that is the case When my copy of Pokémon Sword gets delivered to my house I am going to enjoy it because I will not let petty and incorrect statements sway my feelings and I swear to Arceus if you think the Bitterness will bring down Pokémon that easily then you did not see the queue to the London Poké Center that had been amassing since midnight and was forced to stop taking more people when the doors opened What should matter is how you enjoy the game, play it before you judge it And honestly, don’t send death threats, why we need to tell you that is beyond me, the ones who made these games are people who have worked their asses off day in and day out to provide something you aren’t even going to play because one Pokémon isn’t in it, the irony is not lost on me when I say this but deep into the very bottom of my heart: Grow Up. If you don’t like the game, don’t play it, don’t bother people about it, we don’t need your shit here Enjoy the Game People

#pokemon #pokémon #pokemon sword and shield #Pokémon Sword and Shield #pokemon swsh #rant

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hobiwonder · 6 years ago

Text

Baby, Baby | 01

Pairing: Jimin x Reader x Taehyung

Genre: Surrogacy AU

Warnings: Smut (future), Fluff. A bit of Angst.

Words: 12k

Summary: When you’ve run out of savings to continue on to the last semester of your Bachelors - you take an unorthodox route. Helping a desperate couple have a child and getting paid for it? Heck yeah. But what do you know - it wasn’t as easy as it sounds.

A/N: thanks to @jurassicjimin for being a sweetie and helping me edit ily :(( this fic was getting long so i decided to split it in a couple of parts but it will most likely be 3 chapters max. i hope everyone likes this as i kind of had to rewrite the whole thing and it may not be as eloquent as the one i spent longer time on hjerfvuekhbfkejbf anyway feedback is always appreciated :)

Part 2 |

“Miss Y/N?”

“Huh? Yes?” The receptionist smiled gently at your vacant expression as you were sure you probably looked like you were lost instead of the planning you had been doing for weeks to prepare yourself for this very day.

“We’re ready for you now.” You stood up, smoothing your skirt as much as you could with the thin fabric stubbornly creased just below your hips from sitting down. You had told yourself that you would pay more attention to your posture and the nervous squirming you usually did when… well; when you were nervous as hell. But of course, your own advice was the one you mostly adhered to the least.

“Right this way,” The nice middle aged lady led you towards large wooden double doors. The place was modern, sleek, rustic and most of all – screamed money, all at once. You weren’t sure how many architectural structures could be squashed in to one at the same time and look good as well. But you guessed that money always looked good.

No wonder youdidn’t.

She smiled her gentle smile at you as she opened one of the doors and letting you enter first. You mumble a thanks before glancing towards the back of two heads you could see from where you stood. One blonde, the other black. They sat on a large three-seater sofa while a love couch – which made you snort internally given the circumstances – was placed across from them. Just then, Solhyun – the consultant looking after your case – glanced up from her seat.

“Ah! Y/N come on in, yeah,” She nodded encouragingly as you took small, quiet steps – thanks to your flats – towards the couch that you assumed was going to be where you sat, facing the other two men. Speaking of; they had also stood up with Solhyun as she waited for you to come forward.

“Hello,” You went for a handshake but Solhyun pulled you into a gentle hug.

“How are you?” She asks as her greeting with a bright smile on her face, not waiting for you to respond before she is introducing the most important people – and the ones you’d been nervous as hell to meet.

You wished you had been given a bit more time to get used to the two men before you. Sure, you’d been given their profiles – albeit with limited information as you’d been told that they preferred to meet in person for every meeting, wanting to be heavily involved with the process. But man, you didn’t expect the two men you had decided to be a surrogate for to be this… striking.

“This is Mr. Park Jimin.” The blonde man, shorter than his partner stretched out his hand, placing his left on his elbow as a polite gesture. His hands were incredibly soft, just like the rest of him. Well, you didn’t feel him or anything but he just looked soft. Everything about him was soft – in a more metaphorical sense more than anything – as his eyes turned into slight crescent moons when he smiled gently at you. His lips were fuller than yours, fingers adorned in shiny rings, neck framed by a YSL necklace that you know costed more than your rent for a week. Your breath hitched as his cologne hit your nasal cavity causing you to breathe deeply like a creep. The blush creeping up your cheeks turned your body temp slightly up a notch when you saw the stunning man before you also took in your attire that contrasted his own expensive one. Where the fabric he wore was all silk and rich woven wool – yours were linen and cheap cotton.

“N-Nice to meet you, sir.” You notice the other man’s – taller and broader of the two – eyes flash slightly before his expression is turning into a more stoic one again. Not unkind, just more formal and probably fitting for the arrangement you were all about to make. Or you hoped would make. You really needed this to work out.

“Please, call me Jimin, Y/N.” Your frame stalls for a millisecond at the way your name falls from his lips. You never liked your name more than you did at this moment and tried to convince yourself it wasn’t because Jimin had said it.

“Mr. Kim Taehyung, Jimin’s partner.” Solhyun introduces the more intimidating looking man as he also stretches out his hand as well – also adorned in rings like his partner – while nodding at you.

“Nice to meet you, sir.” Unlike Jimin – he doesn’t ask you to call him Taehyung and you sense he may be have been the partner who was apprehensive about getting a surrogate as you had been informed that the couple that had been matched with you were having some second thoughts. You remember that day had been kind of hell for you.

You weren’t getting matched with anyone after giving an interview and having your portfolio made and it was going to be a major setback for you if you weren’t able to find a couple who needed a surrogate with your criteria. But when Solhyun had contacted you that she had found a couple – more so, they had found you – and specifically wanted to meet you to discuss a potential surrogacy, you’d been ecstatic and wanting to throw up at the same time.

As much as you made a rational, calculated decision, the reality of actually going through with it was something else altogether. Maybe part of you had thought that you would never even find anyone since not many people were keen on conceiving a child with someone who had a family history of breast cancer. You probably wouldn’t even be in this situation if it weren’t for your mother passing away from breast cancer at a young age and leaving you to your own devices. It wasn’t as if you had any other family to ask for any type of help. So when the house you had inherited had been put up for sale to pay for your college fees, you truly had nothing.

As much as it had been hard parting with the house you had grew up in and had countless memories with your mum; it was something you had decided when your mother had passed away. You were seventeen and in your State, legally able to inherit the house and make decisions regarding it just like your mother had also given you power of attorney when her health had deteriorated. Selling the house had been the best and worst decision at the same time. You had never seen that much money in your whole life when you’d received the check but on the other hand, you had a bitter reality check when you had ended up going through most of it with college fees, rent and daily expenses in general. It was as if the more you worked, the more money you needed.

The apartment you lived in may be a shoebox – but it was enough for you. And now, reaching the homestretch of your undergraduate, you were 20 grand short with only the last semester of your degree left.

When you had been accepted in to one of the more prestigious universities, it hadn’t seemed so impossible to actually go through with it since you had a fat check - not the fattest, just fat enough – in your bank, ready to go. After grieving the death of the only family you ever had, it had seemed that better days would never come. But at that time, holding the acceptance letter in your hand – you had felt that things might work out after all. Though, good things never really lasted long for you. And here you were. Willing to go to extreme lengths when you were just so, so close to the finish line.

“Well now that the introductions are out of the way, shall we discuss the arrangement?”

Clearing your throat, you nod, smoothing your skirt before sitting down. Seeing the way all of them were dressed was making you slightly more self-conscious of your own attire. Just a little. You try to keep your eyes on Solhyun as she begins to pull out papers from a manila folder but can’t help and glance towards the blonde – Jimin. He doesn’t hide that he is staring at you but a small, friendly smile is still painted on his face so it doesn’t bother you too much. Apart from the blush that has just took a liking to your cheeks, you are sure you aren’t making a fool of yourself and looking like a lovestruck teenager.

Taehyung however – his expression is stoic. He doesn’t say anything else to you or even look at you like Jimin is. Which was probably for the best. You weren’t sure you could handle two impossibly handsome men looking at you at once. Not that it would matter, you sigh internally. They obviously have no interest in the opposite sex otherwise you wouldn’t be here.

“So, y/n,” you turn your attention completely towards Solhyun as she speaks directly to you.

“Mr Park and Mr Kim would very much like to conceive a child with you.” You almost flinch at her straight forward statement but you guessed that in these types of situations, it was probably for the best.

You can’t help the slightly diameter of your eyes when you look back at the two men. “But a-are you sure? I have a family h-” Internally your brain is screaming and throwing popcorn at you. You’re supposed to be selling yourself to them you idiot! Not make them doubt their decision.

“History of breast cancer?” Jimin has already cut you off with a raised eyebrow and a gentle smile. But this time, the smile holds a touch of sadness to it and doesn’t quite reach his beautiful eyes that had such a spark to them. “We are well aware. That doesn’t matter to us. Well, what I mean is, we don’t have too many other options at the moment.”

You search his face for any regret at choosing you because to be honest – that stupidly hurts you. That you were probably a last resort or whatever rubbish your mind is making up right now. But it doesn’t seem that way at least.

“My partner here,” he turns his face to the side to look at Taehyung before continuing, “doesn’t exactly have the most accepting family when it comes to our relationship. They want him to have children so the business can be passed along the generations. And I know, we thought about adopting.” Jimin must have seen your puzzled face as he starts to answer the exact question you had been thinking about. He was very good at reading people, you note.

“But… inconveniently, Taehyung’s father’s will states that the child needs to be biologically his own.” You lock eyes with Taehyung, feeling like a thousand butterflies are flying around inside your stomach at the intensity in his eyes.

“And I… I have always wanted children. Having one that is related to the love of my life would be a dream come true.”

The smile that he sends your way is so bright, so full of love that you feel the tears of longing welling up but you push them back, not about to make a fool of yourself. The way Taehyung is looking at Jimin speak – anyone in the room who was watching them would be able to tell how much in love they were.

“We have been looking for so long but there wasn’t anyone that we could find at this time. But by some miracle, Solhyun told us about you as soon as you had applied. We are aware of your family history but we have contacted our GP and consulted with him. He says that our child can be tested and screened for any potential signs and I assure you,” he leans forward, sincerity written all over his kind eyes, “we will take the best care of our child. And if – god forbid – he or she is diagnosed, we can afford the best treatment. I promise you that.”

You blink. Once. Twice. Three times. Taking in everything that Jimin had just told you. A funny feeling in your stomach each time he addressed to the child that you were going to give birth to as if he had a heartbeat already. But now you understood why someone was willing to take the risk. N matter how small it may be.

“I… I see. I believe that you probably will be able to, I have no doubt.” You give him a reassuring smile, hoping to put him at ease and he mirrors it right back.

“So, do you wish to proceed with the contract after hearing the specifics?” Solhyun interjects when she sense that both you and the couple have understood each other. You nod as Jimin shoots Taehyung a smile and interlocks their fingers together, placing them in his lap. You can’t help but watch the two from the corner of your eyes. The love they had was so conspicuous that even when they weren’t displaying their affections – it was hard to not come to that conclusion yourself.

“Right. The contract will be for 12 months starting from the day of conception – not literally, that just means the day you are confirmed to be pregnant. All of your medical costs will of course be covered by Mr Kim and Mr Park themselves as well as both or at least one of them being present at each of your OB/GYN appointments. All expenses during your pregnancy will be paid by them as well, including but not limited to: Nutrition and health, housing, clothing and in any case there is an injury. You will receive half of the sum upon signing the contract and the rest of the payment of your surrogacy when the baby is safely delivered. In any case you are to miscarry, and it is concluded that the complications were not brought upon by avoidable circumstances, you will be paid in full. You will not have any contact with the child when it is born or have any parental rights after signing this contract unless agreed upon otherwise by the client. You will not have any rights to apply for custody on the basis of being a biological parent. You will not apply for further compensation from Mr Kim or Mr Park after the child’s birth. Do you have any questions?”

You kind of dumbly stare at her for a few seconds, taking everything in. Which was a lot. Both Jimin and Taehyung are looking expectantly at you. Jimin seeming to be more on edge than his partner as he squeezes his fingers in his lap. Solhyun hands you the papers of the terms and conditions she had just read out, letting you see for yourself and have a read through before you signed the contract officially. Your eyes just about bulge out of your head when you see the amount that you were to be paid was well above what you needed for college.

“F-Fifty thousand?!” the disbelief in your voice is perceived completely opposite by Jimin as he worriedly glances towards Taehyung before looking at you.

“Is that not enough? We are willing to pay you more.”

“No!” You clear your throat after embarrassingly almost shouting at them, “No, this is… this is very generous. Thank you.” The frown creasing your forehead is for once not out of sadness, but gratitude.

“No thanking yet, Y/N. We still have to sign the contract.” Solhyun sends you a smile again and she is right. You still have to sign and actually be able to conceive before you are paid in full. “I know this is a lot to take in and come to terms with. Having a child is not easy and giving it away is even harder so remember – you will have a week to think it over after signing the contract to back out if you wish to. Okay?”

You nod, appreciating that you had the option. But the prospect of being fifty grand richer, being able to finally complete your degree and have a career to sustain yourself in the long run has you feeling the minimum amount of resistance as you nod once again.

“Excellent! Sign here.” She is pointing to various pages as you continue to sign the ten page long contract and you notice that there are already two other signatures on each page. Jimin and Taehyung must have already signed the contract.

“Well, that is all now set. Y/N you will now have a week from now to send in a final response by either calling the office or replying to the email we send you. As soon as you do that, your details will be sent to Mr. Kim and Mr. Park and vice versa and your communication will be directly with them. All subsequent meetings with us will be discussed after the finalisation of the contract. Any questions?”

You’re shaking your head at her as you stand up with her. You guessed it was time for you to go. The two men also stand up, shaking your hand once more.

“Thank you, Y/N. I hope to hear from you again.” Jimin shakes your hand with both of his own, his warm hands holding on to yours for a little longer than before.

“As do I.” Taehyung’s deep, mellifluous voice is almost entrancing and you find yourself looking anywhere but at his eyes, afraid that somehow he’ll be able to tell how nervous you were. His long fingers grip your hand in a solid handshake like they had previously. Stuttering a goodbye, you race out of the room, closing the wooden door behind you and heading straight towards the reception to get a copy of the contract for yourself like Solhyun had asked you to before you left. The whole time you’re waiting for the documents to be scanned and printed, your feet are annoyingly tapping against the tiled floor with the amount of adrenaline running through your system. Even the woman scanning and getting the documentation together gives you a look when a particularly loud tap of your flats against the floor sounds through the large reception area. She seems to be taking her sweet time as well. Just as she is finally starting to compile the papers, the wooden doors open and Jimin and Taehyung are walking out, chatting amongst themselves. Taehyung, however, is wearing a frown on his face as he sighs at whatever Jimin has said to him.

When they are in hearing distance to you – you turn your whole body towards the woman stapling the papers together, almost snapping at her to be quicker. You don’t know why you feel like you need to avoid them right now when you will probably mother their child – most likely. So it was going to be a problem if you were going to always be this nervous around them. Just when you think you’ve successfully avoided them, Jimin spots you standing by the counter and puts his hand up to stop Taehyung from saying whatever he had been and walks over to you. Taehyung doesn’t look the happiest as he watches Jimin walk over to you.

“H-hi,” You can’t help the stutter when he comes to stand close to you – close enough that you can smell his heavenly cologne again. But he doesn’t seem to be in the mood for light hearted chatter when he gets straight to the point.

“I really, really hope you don’t reconsider your decision. As much as Tae didn’t seem like he wants this-” He closes his eyes for a second before opening them again and rephrasing himself, “- needs this to happen – he does. It would mean a lot to us if you can help us.”

“Jimin, babe let’s go. We’re going to be late.” Taehyung’s loud voice has Jimin pulling away and after giving you a small, hopeful smile, he waves goodbye and you do the same. It surely didn’t seem like that was the case as Taehyung almost seems annoyed at Jimin’s little pit stop at the counter with you. You watch them walk out together, hand in hand as a sleek escalade pulls up to the office and in they go.

“They’re good men. Been waiting for a while.” You glance back at the receptionist who hands you the documents – finally- and smiles at you. Everyone in this building smiled a lot.

“Oh.” You don’t exactly know what to say since you didn’t exactly know them for long but you could judge for yourself that they weren’t trying to manipulate or guilt you in to being a surrogate for them. They really did just want a child.

You decide to walk to the grocery store from the office before taking a cab home. That should cut down the fare and plus, you weren’t keen on carrying all the bags by yourself.

Today was the last day you had to think it over before giving your final decision. The whole previous week you had to stop yourself from calling the office and saying yes, forcing yourself to take the time you had and really think it over. This would be one of the biggest decisions you made in your life. While you never really thought about having kids of your own or being particularly fond of them, this was still not going to be easy if you didn’t completely make up your mind.

You weren’t stupid and knew that the bond a mother and her child form before and after birth is natural and can be hard to part with unless you make up your mind that this child is not yours and that you were merely a vessel for someone else’s baby. But you were too close to having your life together to not consider this. You would be helping a couple in need and they would be able to provide for their child. It wasn’t as if they can’t afford anything they will ever need to give it the best life.

Your inner monologue is interrupted when your phone rings. The caller ID makes your heart jump in your mouth when you see it’s Solhyun. Gathering yourself, you will your breathing to steady before you pick up the phone.

“Hi Y/N this is Solhyun speaking, how-”

“I’ll do it.” You blurt out before you can stop yourself. You want to bump your head against the wall for sounding like an idiot and cutting her off when she lets out a sound of surprise.

“Oh! That’s great. I will let Mr. Park know. We will wire half of the sum in your account today and you should receive it in the next 3-5 business days. I will also send you the details of the clinic and the date you have to be there for your artificial insemination appointment. Is that all okay?”

“Y-Yeah, of course. Thank you.”

“Alrighty then, I will forward you the couple’s details as well okay? I’ll speak to you soon, dear.”

You say goodbye, hanging up before clutching your chest finally coming to terms with the fact that you were going to be a mother to someone else’s baby. Still trying to wrap your head around the phone call you’d just had when your phone rings again. But this time, it’s an unknown caller. Your eyebrows furrow, wondering who was calling you at 9pm at night.

“Hello?”

“Y/N?” The soft voice that calls your name is unmistakably Jimin’s – and you can hear the smile in his voice as he says your name.

“Mr. P- Jimin?” Even though he can’t see you, you still try to keep a straight face. Maybe more for yourself than anything.

“Hi there. I just,” He lets out a bubbly laugh that has you smiling with him – keeping a straight face a distant thought, “I’m- We’re really, really happy that you want to continue. I just wanted to call you as soon as I could. I hope I didn’t wake you up?”

“No no, I-I was just eating pizza and watching a… I don’t really know what I was watching to be honest.” To that he laughs again.

“That’s good to hear. I just wanted to ask if you want to meet before the appointment at the clinic?”

“Oh, you know when it is?”

“We were emailed the details just now. Sorry, as you can tell, I’m a bit excited.” His nervous chuckle tells you he’s worried that he might make you uncomfortable but you assure him that it’s alright.

“I understand and yes that would be good I think. When would you like to meet?”

“Is Wednesday okay? The appointment is on Friday and that’s the only day I can steal Taehyung away before the appointment.” The mention of Taehyung has you feeling hot all over again. You’re not sure what but when it comes to him, you always want to just shrink in place. Something about the way he looks at you makes you want to stand out as less as possible. Not that he was unkind or mean or anything. He just… didn’t seem as enthusiastic about this as his partner, despite being the one who would actually father the child.

“Yes that’s okay. Where will I be meeting you?”

“There is a bistro near Taehyung’s office that we often go to so I’ll have someone pick you up at 12 for brunch, alright?”

“A-Alright. You don’t have to.” His chuckle is playful and you could listen to it over and over.

“I know, darling. I want to.” The pet name doesn’t go unnoticed by the damn butterflies in your stomach but you will them to settle down because it’s not like it meant anything. Thankfully, they’re distracted easily that night. You both say your goodbyes and hang up. Once again, you’re clutching your heart like you’ve just run a mile. If just talking on the phone was going to have you react like this… you were in trouble.

___________________________________________________________________________

The days pass like a blur and before you know it, it’s Wednesday. Your IUI appointment was set for Friday as it was the day you started ovulating. When you’d received a call back from Solhyun to confirm that you had indeed received the appointment details, you’d made a passing comment about it being so soon – just in passing. She’d reminded you that they had your ovulation schedule on your profile – as was standard for everyone else – and conveniently, you would start ovulating this Friday so they wanted to start ASAP. Which was fine with you honestly. You were just happy that you had received the payment in your account today as well which meant you can finally pay your fees for this last semester – and on time. With every penny going towards the tuition and admission fees, you were left to bank balance of a marvellous $50 for the next two weeks until you got paid again for your administrative job at the local post office. Scanning papers, helping people fill out passport applications, sending parcels and letters for people was your usual work day. It paid you enough to buy groceries and pay your rent so you didn’t complain. Especially landing this sweet 50k gig too.

You make a face at yourself for thinking of birthing an actual baby as just a ‘sweet gig’. That made it sound a tad bit too casual. Contrary to how you felt at this moment, getting out of the fancy sleek number that had been sent to pick you up and bring you to the chic downtown bistro that was a few blocks away from Kim Enterprises. You’d done some of your research and was shocked to find out that Kim Taehyung was the youngest Kim brother – and the one that preferred the limelight the least. You’d noticed how handsome each brother was but even so, Taehyung stuck out the most to you. Even in a boring, probably the least flattering photo that had been uploaded to their Wikipedia page, Kim Seokjin was the eldest and the one that was currently seen in the business a lot, that even you – who watched nothing but horror movies or SpongeBob (there was no in between) – had seen him once or twice on the news that was usually on at the post office. Kim Namjoon had been labelled the brains behind the company’s recent developments according to the article you had been reading and Taehyung – your future baby daddy – was said to be the developing a new branch for the company that was still in the works but was expected to be a huge success due to the brand loyalty and the recognition the family already had. They were old money from the looks of it. And all of them so darn handsome! How? This wasn’t fair.

They would make pretty babies.

“Want to head in? It’s even better inside.” You almost jump out of your skin when Jimin’s melodiously airy voice speaks somewhere near your ears. And now his ears are going red from chuckling at you. Yours are probably already red. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.”

Was it possible for someone to look even better just in a span of few days? Did he get a facial or some sort of beauty treatment? Because you swear that he looks even better than the last time you saw him at the office and you didn’t think that was possible for a human being. You must have been staring dumbly since Jimin gives you a concerned look when you don’t move. “I really do apologise. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“No, no, no, I-I’m not scared. I’m really fine. I love horror movies.” The word vomit just comes out like… well, vomit. You sucks your lips between your teeth as you start walking beside him. Very evidently embarrassed at your sudden outbursts. You really needed to take a deep breath and calm the heck down. Jimin doesn’t seem to think you’re an idiot though. At least not outwardly because he only wears a kind smile as he leads you to your table.

“That’s good to hear. Tae loves horror movies too.” He’s pulling out a chair for you before he sits across. Just when you’re about to ask where the man in question is, he’s strutting in like the bistro is his runway. You wish you were exaggerating.

“Sorry I’m late babe. Meeting went overtime.” You watch him lean in, pecking Jimin on cheek sweetly before taking a seat next to him. He’s wearing a dark navy blue blazer with a gold Chanel pin on the breast pocket, hair parted like before and a Rolex on his wrist. Looking like a million bucks. You knew that was a Rolex because you literally read an article that was entirely dedicated to the clothes he owned. Weird. But a very interesting piece, you’re not going to lie. Your conclusion in the end was: he’d make really pretty babies who would probably wear mini kid Rolex’s too. Was that a thing? Could you get a child a Rolex? That probably wouldn’t be very wise because-

“You look deep in thought. Unless you’re just silently judging.”

“You would make really pretty babies.” Gosh darn it. Why couldn’t you put a ziplock on your mouth! However you settle for just slapping your hand over your mouth in embarrassment. Is this how you’re going to be like in front of them? They might as well pull out of the contract for not wanting a crazy woman with no filter to mother their child. Jimin seems to be finding you amusing though, with the smirk that’s on his face. Even Taehyung’s face isn’t as stoic as you had last seen at the office.

“Well,” A playful smile on his face as he looks at Taehyung before facing you again, “at the moment, we’re hoping to make pretty babies with you, y/n.”

You can feel the blood rush upwards from every corner of your body and pool in your cheeks. The way he says your name makes it worse because you long to hear it again. But you know you’re being stupid and probably getting too attached already. You needed to reign it in. You’re getting paid for this. Your gaze still lingers in your lap where you’re fiddling with your fingers restlessly; kind of at a loss for words.

“I’m sorry for him. He’s a bit too excited.” At Taehyung’s deep voice, you look up, a little surprised that he’s actually addressing you directly. You’d thought maybe he’d be the more quiet one just like before. But maybe he was just as nervous as you or apprehensive before. You give him benefit of the doubt.

“Oh please! You’re just as excited babe. Don’t pretend to be all macho.” Taehyung’s disgusted face at Jimin has you unsuccessfully attempting to stifle a giggle but when they both look over at your more relaxed posture, they’re joining in too.

“I’m fine really. I can imagine that you would be. A baby is pretty exciting.” Your soft reply and the smile you give them hopefully conveys your sincerity. You don’t want to sound like you’re forcing yourself to say anything just because you’re getting paid to do this.

“It is. We’re… really happy that you’ve agreed to do this, y/n.” You shrug.

“I am getting paid to do this. I should be thanking you.” It was true. It wasn’t as if you’re going to birth their child out of the goodness of your heart. There may not be any other malicious intent there either – you barely knew them – but you don’t want to act like a saint.

Taehyung and Jimin exchange a look before Taehyung is leaning in further on the table, interlocking his fingers in front of him before he speaks, “No, you shouldn’t. I know it doesn’t seem like you’re doing much because you’re being compensated but – it’s a very big commitment to make for someone. Whether money is involved or not. So really, we appreciate this.”

He wasn’t wrong at all. You just didn’t expect them to understand at such a deep level so quickly. “I suppose you’re right. But I do want to thank you though. Thanks to you guys I can actually graduate.” Jimin claps his hands together at the mention of you graduating.

“We saw on your profile! This is your last semester?” you nod, failing to stop the bright smile stretching across your face. You were just so happy whenever you remembered you were almost there.

“That’s amazing! And I saw you’re studying International relations. That’s very interesting. I did a few sociology subjects at University – I know, not the same but similar – and they were fantastic.” Just then a waiter arrives with your entrees that somehow Jimin had ordered while you’d been speaking to Taehyung.

“This calls for a celebration I believe.” Taehyung, for the first time, smiles. He may have smiled at Jimin first but you think it counts. Especially when the stupid butterflies have started to do the salsa in your stomach again. The mozzarella sticks are so stretchy that you’ve pulled your head back as far as it would go without you falling over.

“I’ve never seen someone actually enjoy these like they’re supposed to. See Tae? You’re a party pooper.” Jimin is adorably scoffing at Taehyung before he picks up another for himself and faces you again. You’re trying to not eat like a slob and remember your table manners but man – these mozzarella sticks are good. No wonder they cost 30 dollars per serving. Money not only looked good, but tasted good too.

“C’mon y/n, let’s see whose string snaps first.” Your eyes widen at Jimin’s casual challenge; eating 30 dollar mozzarella sticks in a posh bistro – him in a suit and you in jeans and a flannel – one of you possibly about to fall over.

“Wait, what? Really?” Taehyung is rolling his eyes like he’s witnessed Jimin do this a thousand times before when he looks to the side with a playfully exasperated smile on his face.

“Yes, really! Okay on 3.” You rush in chewing the one currently in your mouth, swallowing the half chewed mozzarella before grabbing another one. He’s counting to 3 and then you’re both leaning back in your seats, trying hard not to break the cheesy string but continuing to stretch it further. Just when Jimin’s head hits the back of the leather seat, the string snaps and you can’t stop yourself before you’re cheering in place for winning the silly challenge. Half of the cheese stick in your mouth and all.

“Serves you right.” Taehyung is trying to hold back his laughter at Jimin’s defeated face before he turn to you again. “He always does this. No matter the time or place. Babe, wipe that frown off your face. It’s not like you don’t win every single time.”

Jimin is sending a glare at his partner as he wipes his face for any extra cheese or crumbs that might be stuck to the peach fuzz on his face. When he misses a bit of grease on the corner of his mouth, Taehyung is already leaning in with a napkin and wiping the oil off his face with such loving eyes you feel like you shouldn’t be watching such an intimate moment between them. Even though there is nothing seemingly intimate or private about wiping food off of your boyfriend’s mouth. Nonetheless, you divert your gaze, not being able to keep your eyes on them when they seemed to be dozing off in their own world with the secretive glances and whispered words that they were saying to each other.

Noticing the shift in your mood, Taehyung clears his throat, getting your attention before Jimin is once again smiling his sweet bright smile at you. “Apologies, Y/N. Jimin here loves to hoard all my attention.” To which the man in question scoffs playfully and you can’t help but giggle to yourself at the cutest nose scrunch you’ve seen on a grown man. For a moment, you’re tempted to ask the couple if the biological father of the child can be Jimin instead.

But then you remember that it wouldn’t matter because you won’t be the one keeping the child anyway and that realisation has you crashing back down to the present and what a serious matter this is. Perhaps they have been trying to make you comfortable too much – although with good intentions – but the fact remained. This matter was nothing but serious and you had to tread carefully otherwise this seemingly formal matter could get very personal and emotional. Taehyung and Jimin had each other but you only had you.

“No need to apologise. I’m glad to know such a loving couple is going to raise a child together. Luckiest kid, I reckon.” The smile you give is genuine but they both can tell the sentiment in your voice. Perhaps it’s time to get serious.

“Thank you, Y/N. We are happy that someone as smart and bright as you is going to mother our child.” Jimin is sincere, there is no doubt about that. He takes Taehyung’s hands in his own and they both send you comforting looks. “We will take responsibility of you throughout this whole process. You don’t need to worry about anything. You are important to us just as much as the baby you will carry for us. Truly.”

Taehyung leans forward once again to get your attention that had been solely on Jimin while he spoke. Your gaze moves on to his sharper features and for a moment you’re getting lost in his large, twinkling eyes. Not as much as Jimin’s but darn it, he was beautiful.

“I wholeheartedly agree with Jimin. You are young and will need a lot of support because as you’ve said – in your profile – you have no living relative?”

The reminder that you are absolutely alone is not one that you needed at this moment. But you know that they meant no harm in mentioning it. “Y-Yes. My mother passed away 4 years ago.”

“I’m very sorry to hear that. Can’t have been easy.”

“It wasn’t but… I’m doing okay. Thanks to you guys as well.” Your grin is mirrored back to you by them both as you reassure them that you are alright. Just then, the food has arrived getting all your attention. The waiter is wheeling a trolley filled with club sandwiches with the thickest, fluffiest bread you have ever seen and your mouth is already watering. You’d had two spoons of peanut butter this morning for your breakfast in an effort to save money for groceries you will buy before you head home.

“Looks good?” Jimin has a teasing smile on his face as he watches you practically drool over the various sandwiches and the thick cut chips drizzled with some sort of sauce with black bits in it. Pepper maybe?

“This looks like the best meal I’m about to have.” He’s chuckling when you talk without taking your eyes off the food. You admit, you may be being a tiny bit rude here but the food really did look thatgood.

“Bon Appetite.” For a second you thought that someone who spoke fluent French, said that to you but it was only Taehyung. Unless…

“Do you speak French?”

“En effet, madame. Tu as de très beaux yeux.”

For once, Jimin and you wear the same expression – his a bit more… carnal than yours admittedly. There was barely a hint of an accent when Taehyung spoke in perfect french. Though he could have called you a donkey for all you knew but, gosh darn – it was sexy.

Okay, you were officially jealous of Jimin.

“You have very beautiful eyes. That’s what he said by the way.” The comment made you blush but you tried to hide it by taking a sandwich triangle. You admit, for a moment you thought about not eating it because it just all looked so prettybut alas, the loud growl in your stomach decided otherwise for you and Jimin sent you an endearing smile while piling up your plate with a whole sandwich, motioning you to continue.

You sent a sheepish smile their way before picking up a thick cut fry with all its golden crunchy goodness. You still had no idea what the sauce was. But your eyes go wide when you take the first bite and the most delicious tangy, earthy flavours explode in your mouth.

“Like it?” Jimin is all but bursting with joy when you vigorously nod after being frozen on the spot for a few seconds. “It’s a mixture of black and white truffles in a butter sauce.”

Your eyes widen in understanding. No wonder you couldn’t quite place your finger on what ingredient you were tasting exactly. Short answer: rich people food.

“It’s amazing. Never thought I’d be eating anything with truffles let alone fries.” The chuckle breaks free, in amazement before you can stop it until you also remember that truffles are expensive. “Oh gosh. Please tell me this sandwich costs less than $50?” You’d worry about humiliating yourself by asking such a question when you’ve already eaten a quarter of the sandwich – later.

Jimin looks slightly startled but wave you off, “Do not worry about that. This is on us. We did invite you here, after all.” You ponder over it for a moment but let it go when Taehyung also reassures you that their invite meant their shout.

“Well, I feel bad that you’re buying me really expensive sandwiches. Pizza hut would’ve suffice as well.”

As far as you’re concerned, you were totally serious. But the two men opposite you who’re muffling chuckles at your pout has you looking at them with a slight glare to your gaze – already feeling comfortable enough with them to treat them to one of your looks.

“What?”

“Nothing, darling. Pizza hut it is – next time.” Jimin’s charming smile that shoes off the one dimple has you melting on the spot. It takes you a moment to continue to chew before swallowing and thankfully avoiding the risk of choking yourself. Oh and hopefully your face isn’t as red as the tomatoes you’re picking out from your sandwich.

“I really should’ve asked you what you liked before ordering. Sorry.” Never did you think Taehyung would be apologizing for not asking your order before putting it in. But you guess he really didn’t dislike you after all.

“No! It’s all good. I really like everything.” And you did.

The rest of the lunch goes smoothly and you three spend the next hour getting to know each other better. You surprisingly have a very relaxed time and quickly forget the nerves that had been clawing their way up your spine and making you jittery before when you’d been cluelessly standing in front of the bistro. You learn that Jimin had went to a renowned dance academy and had met Taehyung after he’d caught the eye of the bachelor at one of his shows in Paris. Apparently Taehyung had chased the elder until he’d given in and went out on a date with him and that had been 7 years ago. Taehyung had been an Art student and particularly into modern, impressionist, post-impressionist and romanticist art. Particularly, Jean Baptiste had been the one to prompt the teenager to study in France.

First of all, you had no idea what any of the forms – “periods” Taehyung had corrected you – of art actually even existed let alone that Kim Taehyung was into ‘romanticist’ art. Nonetheless, you learnt that there was, unsurprisingly, much more to them both than meets the eye.

After you three had finished, both men had insisted on dropping you off themselves and thus how you found yourself sitting in a Rolls Royce, trying to sit as still as possible which makes Jimin ruffle your hair from his seat beside you.

“It’s okay. You can breathe if you like.” You just smile shyly at being caught acting weird like you tend to around them and their… wealth to put it bluntly. Jimin always responded lightly and it never failed to put you at ease.

They pull up outside your apartment building and you can’t hide the blush when Taehyung leans his head down slightly to look out the window, inspecting the front of it thoroughly. You don’t want to act embarrassed but you can’t help it after having a glimpse in to the life they lead which was far more... Full than yours. But the reality was that this is where you lived and were most likely going to live for a while so there was no point in being embarrassed. It may not be much but it was all you had.

“So, we will see you on Friday at the clinic? Solhyun told me you have an ultrasound on Thursday though.” You nod, confirming that you have to go in tomorrow before the big appointment.

“The doctor wants to make sure I am ovulating – just in case – before the IUI. If anything changes then you’ll know.” Jimin reaches over, grasping your hand in his warm one and instantly, your heart skips a beat at the way he looks at you. Concern written all over his features.

“Would you like us to be there?” The question takes you by surprise and for a moment you want to say ‘yes, yes I want you both there.’

Because you were scared. But you know that they would just want to know everything themselves and make sure everything went okay for the amount of money they are spending, after all. You would too.

“I-It’s okay. It’s just an ultrasound. I’ll see you both on Friday.” You smile your assurance and squeeze Jimin’s hand, only waving politely at Taehyung before exiting the car. After you’re safely inside the main door is when the car leaves and you have to lean against it to even your breathing.

“God, please let this all go okay. Please.” You hope your prayer isn’t wasted when you will all your sincerity in to it. For your sake and theirs.

“Hi there y/n. I’m Dr. Klarna and I’ll be doing the IUI for you tomorrow. How’re you feeling?”

You let out a deep sigh that feels like it had been trapped in your throat for quite some time. “Nervous. Really nervous but I think I’ll be okay.” You try to smile at her but it seems like she sees right through it when she gives an empathetic look before smiling at you.

“That is perfectly normal, y/n. This is a bit daunting to be doing in your early 20s and it’s okay to feel like that. Just let me know if you feel too anxious and I’ll see what we can do to ease that, alright?” When you nod firmly, she asks you to lay down on the ultrasound bed and begins.

It doesn’t take too long and an hour later, she is back with the results in her office where you’d been waiting anxiously. When she gives you a reassuring smile, your anxiety lessens just enough to let you breathe.

“You are perfectly healthy and ovulating so no need to worry, okay? You’re good to go and I’ll go ahead and forward these to Solhyun, your case manager. Do you have any questions or concerns?”

You just wanted to go home and relax before the anxiety made you puke. You wonder if it’s the ramen you had earlier that’s making you this way or just the nerves making you feel somewhere between sick and hyperactive.

“No, that’s all good doctor.”

“Perfect. I will see you tomorrow at 1PM. Take care of yourself okay?” Her smile is warm and she genuinely seems to be caring. Her greying hair doesn’t dull the beauty she holds with her warm brown eyes and light brown shoulder length hair. Her words hold the warm tone you’d only ever heard whenever your mother had spoken with you and now you want to ask her if she has children of her own. But you opt for only saying a goodbye and taking your leave.

As soon as you are outside, you feel like you can finally breathe. Yesterday, you’d been so enveloped in your conversations with Jimin and Taehyung that this day had seemed so distant in the future than the reality of it being tomorrow. Walking towards the local grocery store had somewhat calmed you down and going over the list of the essentials you needed for the next two weeks had distracted you enough to get through the day. Conveniently you had forgotten yesterday about going to the grocery store and had only remembered when your stomach had growled at 9pm that night and the empty fridge had poured cold water on you reminding you that you forgot to shop. So the peanut butter had to suffice once more.

Maybe the peanut butter was making you nauseous earlier. Hm.

Oh well. You had one last night before the big event tomorrow.

“Y/n!” Jimin’s airy, familiar voice attracts you immediately when he calls your name as soon as you enter the waiting room the next day.

You had been told that that Taehyung and Jimin had been called to the clinic earlier to give a sample of his… well, semen. You can’t even say ‘semen’ in your own thoughts and you were about to have it injected in to you to make a baby. How ridiculous is that? ‘Grow up, y/n! You’re about to grow another human in you for god’s sake.’

However, your internal yelling doesn’t nearly calm you down as much as Jimin’s warm smile and his unexpected hug does. Tentatively, you put your arms around him as well, returning the warm gesture, letting the butterflies in your stomach doing their dance distract you enough to ease your nerves.

“How are you feeling?” He pulls back enough to ask you.

“I-I am okay. A little nervous.” When he raises his eyebrow in concern, a worried smile on his face you sigh, adding, “Okay. A lot nervous. Kinda feeling like I will puke but that’s just my anxiety.” His eyes soften even further and he drops his arms to take a hold of your hand, leading you to the seats in the waiting room.

“You can still say no. Back out of this if you don’t want to do this anymore. Don’t worry about the contract.”

“No! Of course not. I-I still want to.” When the frown on his face doesn’t go away, you assure him again. “For you and Taehyung. Please. I am okay. I promise.”

It takes him a few seconds but he nods, patting your hand and giving you a reassuring smile. “Okay. We will be waiting for you right here.”

Just then, Taehyung appears in front of you two. You and Jimin may have been sitting in silence but you had still missed when Taehyung had walked out of the doctor’s office.

Upon seeing the sombre looks on the both of your faces, his own is turning stony as well. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah. She’s just a bit nervous.” Jimin reassures Taehyung, your hand still in his own as you also stare at Taehyung too.

“What? Getting cold feet already?”

“Tae!”

You don’t have too much time to process his harsh, accusing tone because just then, the nurse is calling your name. And as much as you were nervous before, you’re thankful that you’ve been given an out because you’re not exactly sure what to say to him. You’re nervous enough that you may cry instead of the anger that usually bubbles up in you when someone talks to you that way.

Instead, you squeeze Jimin’s hand, giving him a forced smile and look at Taehyung just once before walking away with the nurse. You can hear Jimin furiously whispering to Taehyung as you’re walking and that only makes you want to walk faster. Not wanting to hear anything they are talking about and feel worse than the way Taehyung’s sudden change of attitude has you feeling.

Thankfully, you’re busy getting changed into the patient gown you’ve been given and settling in the bed, setting your feet up just the way you’d done before at your usual check-up at your gyno appointment. When Dr. Klarna comes back, with her gloves on this time, you can feel the nerves coming back once again. Closing your eyes and taking deep breathes, you will your heart to stop buzzing in your chest and calm down so you don’t pass out.

This really was happening.

“Okay y/n. Keep taking deep breathes for me and try to keep calm. If you feel like you’re going to be sick just let me know okay?” You nod, keeping your breathing relatively stable as you continue to breathe deeply.

“Alright, perfect. So I’m going to insert the catheter in to your vagina, passing your cervix and up to the uterus. It will feel just like a pap smear but it will allow the sperm to swim up straight to the egg and hopefully fertilize it.” You nod once again, watching the thin, long tube that she’s holding.

“W-Will it hurt?” You know it may sound like a juvenile question but you needed to know. You hated needles and even though this was just a tube – it was still going inyou.

“It shouldn’t hurt at all. You may feel like your stomach is slightly cramping but it won’t be unbearably painful. Anything else you want to know before we begin?” She doesn’t sound impatient at all. You know she wants you to be relaxed before she proceeds and you want this to be over with before the nerves come back. So you shake your head at her and she smiles before asking you take another deep breathe.

“Okay, here we go.” Your eyes close on their own and before you can really think too much about it, you can feel the tube being inserted inside you. At one point, the sensation is dull enough that you can’t really feel the tube going any deeper inside. Just when you’re about to ask her how long it will take, she is pulling back – the tube in her hand as she disposes it off.

“All done!” Already?

“Oh. That was quick.” She chuckles at your dumbfounded expression. You really should have done more research. You had opted against it in case you found something that made you too nervous to continue but perhaps this won’t be too bad…

“Yup. It’s pretty simple. Inserting the sperm near its destination and that’s it. You just need to keep laying down for the next hour so we can maximise the chances of the sperm reaching the egg. Do you need some water? Can I get you anything?”

You settle back down on the bed and shake your head at her. “I’m okay. Thank you.”

“Feel free to take a nap if you like.” She’s washing her hands as she gives you a small smile. “I’ll send the nurse to wake you when it’s time.” You thank her again as she leaves and try to relax.

So this was really happening huh? As much as you were starting to feel okay about this – Taehyung snapping at you with such disdain wasn’t exactly bringing your spirits up. Why had he been so angry? All the possibilities of the ‘why’ keep you pondering for the next how many minutes – you’re not sure. Just when you’re dozing off – the nurse comes in and lets you know you can change back in your clothes and are free to go. Lazily, you tug on your jeans and shirt and grab your bag before the nurse comes back again with a clipboard.

“Y/N, dear. Give us a call as soon as you start feeling any of those symptoms okay?” She’s handing you a sheet full of signs of you potentially being pregnant, “Usually it takes about 2 weeks before you start feeling the fatigue, nausea and such – that’s if the implantation has been successful. If we don’t hear from you then Dr. Klarna will schedule an appointment just for a check-up and send you the details. All the details of today will also be forwarded to your case worker.”

You nod, reading over the sheet as she speaks. “Any questions my dear?”

“No, thank you. I will give Dr. Klarna a call as soon as I feel a bit off.”

“Alright then. Take care.” She lets you go with a kind smile that you try to mimic just because she was too nice for you to not smile back. However, your smile is slipping away as soon as you see Jimin on the waiting chairs, head resting back against the wall while he seems deep in thought. Though, as soon as you come in his line of vision, he jerks up, standing just a few steps away from you.

“Y/N… are you alright?”

“Yeah. What are you still doing here?” You really didn’t expect him to stick around after the way Taehyung had reacted. Thinking he would probably take him elsewhere to cool off because surely, his boyfriend was more important than sitting around and waiting for you to be done.

“What do you mean? I wanted to be here for you. Listen…” He’s shifting on his feet, a sigh escaping his lips before he continues, “Taehyung was out of line. Please don’t think too much of it. He just… We’ve been left at the last minute before and he just panicked and thought maybe you… you were leaving us too.”

The way Jimin says ‘us’, the pain in his voice tells you that he’s telling the truth. Out of the two of them, you could safely say that you trusted Jimin more than anyone you had trusted in such a short amount of time. So you give him the benefit of the doubt, just for Jimin.

“Okay. I guess I understand.” You nod at him, forcing on a small smile to ease his worries.

“Thank you. I sent him home to cool off but I didn’t want you to be alone.”

“I…” You try to find the words to respond but you can’t. You had just assumed that you would go home by yourself after the procedure. No second thoughts that one of them might be waiting for you. Maybe you were too used to be alone. And even though this companionship may be temporary – it was still real for the time being. And if Jimin continued to look at you the way he did every time, you might as well kiss your heart goodbye.

“Okay. I’m fine though.” Jimin takes your hand in his, walking out of the clinic without breaking the link between your hands.

“I’m glad. Let me drop you home.”

“It’s okay-” Jimin hushes you while opening the door of his escalade – you assume the car is his own since no driver is in sight.

“No arguments. I’m taking you home.” Biting the smile that’s threatening to break lose, you just look out of the window, murmuring a thanks and let him drive you home.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay with you?” For the tenth time probably, Jimin is asking you this question. His sweet eyes filled with trepidation.

“I will be fine, Jimin.” You stretch your arm across to his seat, using every ounce of courage in you to grab his hand softly to reassure him. Up until now, Jimin has been the one to initiate any physical contact and you had just gone along with it. But this was the first time you were reaching out to hold his hand to convey your sincerity. You were just fine.

“The doctor said I’m okay to do what I usually do in the day.”

“And what is that exactly?” You don’t miss the teasing smirk that’s stretching across his pretty face.

“Well,” you drag out the syllables, racking your brain for what you’re usually doing at this time, “Probably making dinner and watching SpongeBob.” The only way to describe Jimin’s laugh is magical. Magical and contagious because you’re smiling too as he throws his head back, eyes turning in to crescent moons as he mumbles an ‘okay.’

“Don’t laugh! It’s fun.” You can’t help the pout that your lips have turned in to. SpongeBob was a sensitive topic for you. When Jimin Calms down from his fit of giggles, he looks over at you once more, bringing a hand towards your cheek.

His warm finger tips slide against your jaw before his thumb is rubbing just the very slightest on your chin as his index finger holds it. Time seems to have stopped while you try hard not to stare at his plush lips. His own eyes seem to be flicking back and forth from your lips to your eyes. Finally, as if he’s shaken himself out of a trance himself.

“Okay. Take care and call me if you need anything. Okay?” You nod – or you think you do because you seem to be on autopilot at the moment. Damn him for malfunctioning your whole entire brain with just a caress to your chin. Your chin! You really needed to get laid if you were lusting after gay men.

Wait- no. You can’t. Trust you to forget that you’re literally trying to make a baby for them.

“O-Okay I will. I promise.” After a few more seconds of sizing you up, he lets you go, unlocking the door for you to climb out.

You wave bye at him but he refuses to drive away until you are safely inside. Just when you are heading upstairs to your apartment, he drives off.

The familiar but unwelcomed butterflies are back again but you just tell yourself those are ‘cramps’ like the doctor told you.

It’s been 4 days since the IUI and today you’re finally feeling the cramps that Dr. Klarna had told you about. They hadn’t been too intense in the morning but as the day has gone by, the discomfort level had steadily climbed up. You’re in the middle of texting Jimin back – he’s texted every day to make sure you are alright; much to your protest that he didn’t have to – that a particularly nasty cramp makes you double over.

“Ow! Frick…” You’re trying hard to not swear – you didn’t particularly like to – but the pain was so intense that you have to grab the counter of your kitchen with one hand while the other clutches your stomach. You take a deep breath, walking over to your sofa – that’s just a few steps away in your small apartment, thankfully – and sit down.

And just like that – you spend rest of the day either on your sofa watching TV or curling up in your bed -taking random naps. At first – the thought that you might be pregnant goes through your head immediately but then you remember reading on the sheet that the chance of you being pregnant this early on is very rare. So instead, you just suck it up and also remember that you should be getting your period in just over a week if you’re not pregnant so the cramps could be explained by that. Even if you’ve only ever gotten cramps a day or two before your period. Nonetheless, you didn’t want to raise a false alarm.

It’s 10PM at night when you receive another message from Jimin, asking if you’re okay. You realise that you had forgotten to press send to your text earlier in the morning and probably worried him more than he already does. Quickly texting him back, you grab your pajamas, heading to the toilet to change. A few minutes later, you’re ready for bed and before you know it – already dreaming about a certain someone kissing the hell out of you.

The next morning – you blame the hormones for that particular dream.

It’s the 9thday after the procedure that you see the blood smeared on your underwear and your heart drops.

“What…” Your breathing has picked up and it feels like your throat is closing up at the thought of you not being pregnant if you’re getting your period already. It’s irrational, you know. The Doctor had warned you that you may not get pregnant on the first try but you had never really entertained the thought too much. Dismissing it as being not the case for you when she’d told you that it likely won’t be since you’re so young. However, the cramping… the mood change and now blood. You had to be getting your period right? Maybe the IUI messed up your period symptoms a bit but it was close enough to your period that this could be it. You were spotting already.

Quickly rushing out of the bathroom, you hastily punch in the number of the clinic, knees bouncing with anxiety as you hear the ringing. “Hi! May I speak to Dr. Klarna please? I-It’s y/n. Please tell her it’s y/n.”

“Alright, just a second please.” Whoever is on the line is thankfully not making a fuss – probably because of your panicked voice. So you calm yourself down; taking deep breathes.

“Y/n?”

“I’m bleeding.” The words come out before you can even greet her properly.

“Okay, Y/N, that’s alright. Don’t panic. How much are you bleeding?”

“J-Just spotting. I think I may have my period.” There is silence over the other line for just a few seconds too long to make you start self-fulfilling your theory.

“I’ve booked you in for today at 4:30. Are you okay to come down to the clinic y/n?”

“Yes. Yes I’m okay with that.”

“Perfect. Just wear a pad for now if the bleeding is too much. No tampon. I’ll see you soon okay?”

“Okay.” You’re nodding to yourself, thanking her before hanging up.

What if you weren’t pregnant? You didn’t want to disappoint Jimin and Taehyung. Would Taehyung even speak to you if you weren’t pregnant? What if you had to pay all the money back? You’ve already deposited it to your college and had no idea how you’ll get 20k back if there is something wrong with you and this all doesn’t work out.

“Oh god...” Taking deep breaths, trying to stay calm, you force yourself to have a drink of water and not think about all the what-ifs that will drive you mad. Instead, you put on SpongeBob and let the silly cartoons take your mind off of what could be happening to you.

“Your results should be done any minute. I’ll go and have a look, okay?” You nod, sitting on the examination bed of Dr. Klarna’s office once again. “Mr Park and Mr. Kim are outside.”

At the mention of the two men, your heart rate is rising once again. But it was only logical for them to be here, you suppose. “They are asking to see you. Would you like me to send them in?”

“I- Okay.” As much as your nerves are telling you otherwise – if you couldn’t face them then you would have an even bigger problem when it came to the time of breaking the bad news to them. She gives you a nod before she’s leaving the office. Taking in a deep breath, you prepare yourself for their arrival.

Just a few short minutes later, Jimin is entering the office – a beige trench coat adorning his lithe frame, making him look bigger than he was. And a few seconds later – Taehyung’s taller frame and sharper features are in your view as well. His face is passive and you’re not sure how to greet him. Jimin however, is rushing to your side – taking your hands in his own as he stands close enough that you can smell his cologne.

“Are you alright? We heard you felt unwell and came as soon as we could.” The smile that finds its way on to your face is something natural – something uninhibited that Jimin seems to pull from you and no matter how much you trained yourself to not melt in to a puddle, you still turned putty whenever he had his hands on you. Which was more often than not.

“I-I’m okay. I was just,” taking a deep breath as you look down at both of your hands, trying to earn the courage to say the words, “I was bleeding this morning.”

You know that Jimin is smart enough to realise what that could mean and you don’t need to look at his face to see the disappointment that might lurk there. However, while trying to not look at Jimin, you can see Taehyung instead in your view and you can see the negative emotion in his face more clearly than what you think you’ll find on Jimin’s

“I’m so-”

“Mr, Kim, Mr Park.” Dr Klarna had just entered the room then, nodding at both of the men with a bright smile on her face as she glanced to her clipboard and then back to you and Jimin.

“Doctor, is she okay?” Jimin lets go of your hands, walking more towards where Taehyung stood to hear what she had to say.

“She won’t be feeling so hot for the next few weeks though.” Her smile is getting bigger and so is your confusion.

“Congratulations. Y/n is pregnant. You and Mr. Kim are expecting.”

Oh.

A/N: Thanks 4 reading !!! Next chapter will be posted this time next week :) hope everyone had a lovely christmas!

#jimin x reader #taehyung x reader #bts fanfction #jimin fanfic #taehyung fanfic #okay im done with tags khwbrfkwrbhf #i hope u guys like this

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raulsparza · 5 years ago

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Moby Dick: A Musical Reckoning: 1.2.2020 ~Thoughts~

Alright so I loved it. There were parts I felt unsure about throughout, and there are parts I would alter or cut, but it felt like a malloysical and I was captivated the entire time. I was a little worried it would drag because 3 ½ hours is a good hour longer than any other show I’ve seen but it definitely didn’t. I would have happily sat in that theater for another two hours. Unfortunately, my biggest gripe was with the microphones. I feel like I missed a fair amount of what the cast was saying and I’m glad I had my knowledge from reading the book to fall back on.

Bullet point thoughts for each part under the cut, because this became too long

Prologue:

- Opening with the Jonah and the whale story rocks. We are all in the belly of the whale. Made the audience part of the show immediately. Let’s get on the Pequod together why don’t we.

- Manik Choksi stepped onstage, wearing a baggy water-splashed jacket, and I was hooked. He was the perfect Ishmael and I had that thought no less than 30 times throughout the show. Perfect casting. Perfect man.

- First we got a little introduction into the history of the theater and the book itself. The show broke the fourth wall often, critiquing both Herman Melville’s writing and the state of the world as it stands today. Sometimes this felt a little on-the-nose (my friend reflected she would have liked more show-don’t-tell tactics) but it’s also an interesting way to be a critical consumer of media while still enjoying the original story. The Melville bust and the physical book Moby Dick were both on stage the entire show.

Part 1:

- And then, “Call me Ishmael” – chills. It’s a damp drizzly November in his soul and we are heading off to sea.

- Starbuck, Stubb, and Flask had this wonderful repeating joke where each of them had to say the other two names any time they all interacted and it was good fun. Each shipmate got introduced, perhaps a little quickly but they all did develop further later. Queequeg even said he would get his own song in a bit.

- Queequeg’s own song really did not work for me. It was a bit too campy. It followed Ishmael’s strong desire to not share a bed with a cannibal in the book, but it was still goofy. I keep going back and forth on how goofy I am comfortable with the first half of the show being, to really contrast it with the darker later half, but this song was a bit much for me. It ended with some great cuddling, and I would have liked some quiet dialogue between Ishmael and Queequeg while they were holding each other in bed.

- Tom Nelis as Ahab KILLED IT. (well the show, not the whale). He looked like an absolute corpse of a man in respectable captain garb. The physical acting he did to walk and sit with his ivory leg was astounding.

- I honestly just really loved the casting for this show. I could make a separate point for everyone. But Starr Busby as Starbuck really needs her own point. She was commanding and human and torn and excellent.

- DEATH TO MOBY DICK! Intense green lights and music as Ahab touched the lances and then poured shots into the harpoons. It was exciting! It was only border-line concerning. We are descending, but we have not yet descended.

Five minute pause:

- Manik made eye contact with me

- He picked volunteers for part 2. I was not picked to be a volunteer but he sure did pick the guy right next to me and told him he could “tell your friend all about it!” so Manik also talked about me

Part 2:

- Audience volunteers were ushered onto the stage and adorned in red ponchos as they were warned of a splash zone.

- Cetology was perfect. I unironically enjoyed this notoriously terrible book chapter so you bet your ass I shared Ishmael’s child-like excitement as he named all the whales that cast members brought out in puppet-form. This song could have been longer. It could have been much longer. It became a running joke to cut Ishmael off when he was about to go on a tangent and I just want to live in a world where Manik is given the time and space to infodump eight hours of whale anatomy to me and me alone.

- Then four little boats on wheels came up out of the stage and the audience volunteers were each rounded up by a cast member and put in a boat. This took a bit of time (honestly, as fun as the volunteers are, I could see this being where the show would be shortened first) but I had a stupid grin on my face the whole time and the boats went around the stage, commanded by the crew with harpoons at the ready.

- Stubb killed a whale and the use of puppetry here was my favorite in the show. A whale made of crumpled plastic water bottles was brought to center stage and took it’s last shuddering breaths. Someone crouched inside the puppet to make it breathe shallow and raspy, and to spray some ‘blood’ in the direction of the audience volunteers.

- Fedallah broke the fourth wall and gave a wonderful critique of the Melville’s inability to give this character any depth. Again, this teetered between good exploration and on-the-nose preaching for me. It’s clear we are not just watching a Moby Dick adaptation, but we are also part of an important literary critique. Would all of the critique have been better off in the prologue, or is it useful to interrupt the flow of the story for this sort of discussion? I’m still not sure. The more I think about it, the more I liked it woven in the story because it’s reflective of how we end up consuming media, but it caught me off guard at first because it’s unusual in a setting where characters are delivering a story. Again, maybe that’s a good thing.

- The whale as a dish was stupidly fun. Lots of props for whale parts and buckets of blood and a very enthusiastic Stubb. Kalyn West was bouncy and limber and was very adept at dealing with her pipe the whole time. Another example of a goofy song to contrast the darkness later. I enjoyed it a lot.

- Cast and volunteers then all sat in a circle around the stage and squeezed some sperm. Queequeg waved Ishmael over to sit next to him and they shot each other cute glances during the song.

- The Pequod met the Bachelor and the sailors danced on the platform right next to me. Dawn Troupe shook my hand at the end of it bless

- Tashtego and Daggoo sat up in the crow’s nest and interpreted whale song. Some of their dialogue felt stilted but Tash had a beautiful song.

- Starbuck confronting Ahab and then Ahab pulling a gun on Starbuck…INTENSE. Man, Starbuck really shined for me here.

Intermission:

- Shout out to the crew members that have to mop up whale blood for this 15 minute chunk of time

Part 3:

- We’re in Pip hours babey. Maybe I would have liked Pip’s character to have been developed more before this part. It was developed retrospectively throughout part 3 but some sprinkling of Pip in 1 and 2 could have worked for me.

- I’ve seen better analyses of tambourine than I could write rn so I’m not gonna get too deep into it. But, I agree that the race elements could have been handled different? Better? Get Dave a co-writer maybe? The thing about gender was odd to me. I’m also curious about the cast’s thoughts on this one. I ALSO agree that this song slaps. It’s been the one most consistently stuck in my head. And Morgan Siobhan Green’s acting/dancing/writhing really stood out to me.

- Loved Pip in the whaleboat while the rest of the cast billowed a big blue sheet in the middle of the stage. The song about Pip being left behind in the water was haunting.

Part 4:

- Part 4 was by far my favorite. Holy shit. This part felt the most uniform and really solidified the show for me as Good Theater. If there was a way to preserve some of the goofiness from part 2 but also develop the characters throughout in the way they were treated in part 4, that would be ideal. Like I REALLY loved part 4.

- Got some good Queequeg and Ishamel moments here. I am disappointed their relationship wasn’t highlighted even more. Other than their songs, they held hands center stage together at one point (during Fedallah’s prophecy I think?). Which like, fine, but also Melville married them so that could have happened too.

- “No one grew into anything new, we just became the worst of what we were.” Well dAMN. Excellent summation of the story right there. Ishmael kept repeating this haunting line, and then it kept repeating in my head till the end. Perfect.

- Sextet rocked so hard everyone had a different conflict they were working out and different musical themes and Starbuck shined because Starbuck shined the whole time but wow I loved it. Ahab is all focused on a new leg and harpoon, meanwhile Queequeg is sick and only Ishmael is helping him. And Stubb and Flash hanging off the crow’s nest saying in dissonant unison “shall we lower Mr. Starbuck” really highlighted Starbuck’s great desire to not lower. *Chef’s kiss*

- And y’all. When they chased Moby Dick. Three ropes came out of the front of the stage that they all pulled on and big BRIGHT lights (think Anatole in great comet) shown into the audience. There was slow motion rope pulling as the cast swayed and struggled. It was so visually beautiful and it worked so well.

- And then I wanted to hug Ishmael but I want to do that a lot.

Bottom line, this was not a favorite of mine and I think it still needs some restructuring and rewriting to really be coherent and final, but I enjoyed it a lot. The pit and crew and cast and design team all worked incredibly hard. This must have been a marathon for the performers! I have a lot more thoughts that are still developing, which I also like. I want to leave a theater and continuing thinking about the show. I’m excited to see how this musical reckoning might change over time.

#moby dick #dave malloy #moby dick musical #not sure if anyone wants this but i needed to document #come chat about it with me!

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yandere-wishes · 5 years ago

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Twisted Wonderland Ocs!

Genie: *Appears on stage* EEEYYY here we are with our new twisted wonderland yandere OCS

Beloveds: *Forced clapping* get help (no Genie this is not a marvel reference!!) seriously just go get help.

Genie: Before we start please note that all characters here, other than the two bachelors are not blood-related by any means. They do however share a surname. It's one that they came up with themselves. As well as sharing the characteristic of hyena ears. Without further, a dew lets meet our lovely bachelors and bachelorette!

Name: Luna Annamaria Carnivora Vivica Jessica Bucchi

Nicknames: Lun (everyone), Viv (Banzi) big sis (everyone), Jessie (Me) my dear (Leona).

Dorm: Savanclaw

Year: 3rd year

Twisted from: Shenzi from Lion King

Age: 20

DOB: November 18

Physical Appearance (I do not have a picture for them yet, so if anyone is up to draw them that would be great!)

Luna has dark brown skin, usually littered with cuts and bruises. It's not rare to see her with a multitude of bandages and gazes covering up recent wounds. Large downturned grey/blue eyes with long lashes. She has a mole next to her left eye. Her raven-colored hair is straight and long, reaching and curling at past her lower back. Her bangs normally reach to slightly above her eyebrows. Her, built is rather lanky due to not receiving enough food on a daily bases. Her fingers are long with nails being covered as sharp claws able to cut skin. There is a slight limp in her right leg.

Story

Luna was born into a middle-class family, with a father working as an architect and a housewife mother. Her childhood was typically a happy and normal one. Around the time she was thirteen her father was fired for an unknown reason, though it's highly suspected that he was selling information to another company. This left the family with a lot of debuts and no means of paying them. Seeing no other solution, Luna's mother sent her off to live with her aunt. Despite being a kind and even motherly figure to the young girl, Luna and her aunt never really saw eye to eye. Her aunt pushed her to seek a higher form of education, pushing her to her limits to get a multitude of different scholarships. By fourteen, she had an athletic scholarship to the top private academy of the pride lands (or where ever it is the savanclaw people come form). However as time went on, the young girl began to note a shift in her aunt's mood. The once lively women became reserved and almost shut off from the world around her. She seemed to be in her own universe, this lead to Luna having to take up almost all chores around the house. A few months later Luna overheard her aunt on the phone with her parents. Her aunt begged them to and collect luna, in which they declined, saying that they could not take care of another person. This broke Luna's heart and it's around this time that she began to neglect her studies and sneak out at nights. On one of her nightly escapes, she encountered two boys about the same age as her, named Brazium and Elysium They were planning on sneaking into a club to do some pickpocketing. Intrigued the young girl hatched a plan to get them in. They later split their earings amongst themselves. This became a routine for the trio, hitting different bars and sometimes even school events at Luna's school. It was one of these nights that Luna came home to find polices at her aunt's house. The policemen told her that her aunt had overdosed on anti-depression and was found dead mere hours ago. Being/feeling abandoned for the second time, Luna took matters into her own hands. She was able to use whatever money her aunt had left to buy a small house in "the outlands" deciding she needed a pack to survive she invited Brazium and Elysium to come live with her, they both obliged. For the next three years, the trio lived in the outlands, having become a sort of ruling family amongst the other residents.

Personality

Luna is rather bossy and snarky, usually following a "agree with me or suffer" kind of manner. She is extremely sarcastic and at times dramatic, facing any problem or opponent with an eye roll and comment. She is rather independent and never likes being told what to do. All this being said she is extremely possessive of anything she has, fearing that it will be taken from her.

She can play the piano as an angel

got into night raven due to being friends with Leona kingscholar

Was given a scholarship to med school, which she turned down for Night Raven.

Could kill you with her glare

Has enough sarcasm to go toe to toe with Leona

Prefers to negotiate before starting a fight.

Leona is her closest friend and she considers her a brother like the rest of her "siblings"

Is on bad terms with Lionel (see @edda-blattfe)

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Name: Brazium Corbin Atilla Bucchi

Nicknames: *Insert degrading nickname here* (Leona and Luna), chalk eyes (Ruggie) brain cell number 2 (Ruggie and Elysium ) the family screw up (everyone) Banz (Me)

Dorm: Savanclaw

Year: 2nd year

Twisted from: Banzai from Lion King

Age: 19

DOB: April 4th

Physical Appearance (again still no picture)

Brazium has caramel-colored skin with a spinal cord tattoo over his actual spinal cord (Genie what the hell do you come up with?). His hair is a dark shadow like grey color, that is never kept properly and is always sticking in every direction. He usually wears heavy eye showdown around his teel eyes. His tongue and has a piercing which he gave himself using his father's tools when he was about thirteen.

Story

Brazium and his younger twin Elysium were born into a rather poor family. Their dad owned a tattoo and piercing shop. Their mother was a nurse before she hopped out of the family. From a young age, the brothers learned to operate their father's tools and run the shop, they also learned how to steal and fight as another means of survival. Their dad did try raising them right and making sure they had a good education. by fourteen the boys had taken up pickpocketing in bars and a private school, thanks to their new friend luna. One night the boys were woken in the middle of the night to the police asking them to come over to the station. There they were shown a corps and asked if they recognized it. They did, seeing as how the corpse was their father's. The policeman told them that he had been hit by a car and that they were not able to find the driver. The boys later learned that it had been an aristocrat and that she'd been able to get away with it due to her hight nobility. After hearing the news Luna approached the two boys and asked if they wanted to move in with her. They agreed and for three years they lived as a family. Later on thanks to Elysium another member would be added to them.

Personality

Brazium is short-tempered, aggressive and gluttonous. He mostly thinks with his fists and is quick to start fights. He will downright insult anyone going so far as to threaten them over measly things, such as pitty arguments. He is constantly complaining about one thing or another and has yet to answer the question "how are you" with a pleasant response. With all this said he does have a loving and joking sideshow only yo his family. When Ruggi was younger Brazium would always take him outside and find a means of entertaining him. He has the utmost respect for Shanzi and belives her to be the brains of the family.

He's great at boxing and martial arts, going toe to toe with Leona

He is a genius when it comes to languages

He's fluent in pig-Latin, English, Swahili, French, Spanish, German and Japanese.

Was the first out of the four Bucchi siblings to ask about Leona's scar

Will do anything and everything for his family (Leona included)

Is very superstitious

He loves slushies

got into night raven due to being friends with Leona kingscholar

does surprisingly well in potion making and has gained a bit of Divus’s respect

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Name: Elysium (El) Zayne Hani Bucchi

Nicknames: El (Everyone) giggles (Ruggie) brian cell number one (Leona and Luna)

Dorm: Savanclaw

Year: 2nd year

Twisted from: Ed from Lion King

Age: 19

DOB: April 4th

Physical Appearance (no picture)

El is typically described as having gentle features in contrast to his brother's rough appearance. His hair is practically as long as his sister's. Despite keeping his grey hair in a high ponytail there are still thin strands around his face. His skin is also a caramel-like color much like his brothers. He has two wing tattoos on both his shoulders along with a multitude of ear piercings. His eyes are lean and a lighter teal shade than his brothers.

Story

Elysium and his older twin Brazium were born into a rather poor family. Their dad owned a tattoo and piercing shop. Their mother was a nurse before she hopped out of the family. From a young age, the brothers learned to operate their father's tools and run the shop, they also learned how to steal and fight as another means of survival. Their dad did try raising them right and making sure they had a good education. by fourteen the boys had taken up pickpocketing in bars and a private school, thanks to their new friend Luna. One night the boys were woken in the middle of the night to the police asking them to come over to the station. There they were shown a corps and asked if they recognized it. They did, seeing as how the corpse was their father's. The policeman told them that he had been hit by a car and that they were not able to find the driver. The boys later learned that it had been an aristocrat and that she'd been able to get away with it due to her hight nobility. After hearing the news Luna approached the two boys and asked if they wanted to move in with her. One day while Elysium was walking around the outlands he spotted a young boy covered in blood. Murders were something normal in the area. El didn't think too much of it and tried to walk away, only to have the small boy follow him. He soon gave up and picked the kid and went home. Brazium and Luna weren't too happy with this but soon came to love the baby as one of their won. El took care of Ruggie the most since Shenzi usually had to work part-time jobs and Braziumwas in charge of meal prep and house chores. All was well until freaking Brazium lost Ruggie! (Genie: Banz how the hell does one lose a seven-year-old??!! Brazium: *shrugs and goes back to drinking his slushie*) It all turned out well in the end where they sorta ended up adopting Leona as well.

El has a disability which prevents him from properly talking

This, however, doesn't stop him from having a keen eye and being able to solve certain problems quickly

He and Brazium tend to fight a lot, it's usually up to Luna and Ruggi to split them up. While Leona cheers them on from the couch or wherever.

I Sorta want to go sci-fi on him and give him a voice box or something IDK

Is secretly Ruggie's favorite sibling

Despite not being the most violent out of the Bucchi family he gets rather aggressive around the lions, blaming them for his father's death and Leona's suffering

Refuses to call Leona a Kingschola and insists that he is a Bucchi

Has received nothing but A in Ashton’s class

His best friend in Night Raven is Kalim

Genie: Well that wraps but our show for tonight ladies and gentlemen! Their yandere personalities will be released at a later date, after the last "member" of the family is finished! Also a huge thanks to @edda-blattfe for helping me with all of this, love you lots darling!

Beloveds: No more, please no more! Go back to being a normal yandere blog, please. We will pay you to stop with the Twisted wonderland ocs!

#twisted wonderland #disney #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland oc #disney ocs #savanaclaw #ruggie bucchi #twisted wonderland ruggie bucchi #leona kingscholar #twisted wonderland leona kingscholar

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writing-prompts-for-friends · 5 years ago

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Notes on Robert McKee’s “Story” 17: Essential Qualities of a Protagonist (and Other Characters)

Today we cover McKee’s rundown of the essential qualities of the protagonist, a.k.a. The Main Character who does The Thing. That’s the dictionary definition; trust me I have a Bachelor’s in English. Because Thor is the best my favorite superhero, I’m going to see if he (in the Marvel Cinematic Universe) ticks all the boxes of McKee’s qualities of a protagonist. Warning: all the spoilers. Additional Warning: Long post.

The Protagonist

Usually, the protagonist is one person. However, sometimes stories are driven by a duo, such as THELMA AND LOUISE, or a trio or more. These are called Plural-Protagonists.

For two or more characters to form a Plural-Protagonist, two conditions must be met:

All individuals in the group share the same desire

In the struggle to achieve this desire, they mutually suffer and benefit.

So we can say that THE AVENGERS has the Plural-Protagonists of all the Avengers. They seek to defeat Loki, regain the Tesseract, and save the world from the Chitauri invasion.

A story can also be Mutliprotagonist. Here, characters pursue separate and individual desires, suffering and benefiting independently. We could use the unfortunate film Thor 2: The Dark World as an example. (Do you remember it lol?) Loki and Thor are forced to work together to defeat the Dark Elves, but each for very different desires and benefits.

Other examples of Multiprotagonist works would be PULP FICTION and THE BREAKFAST CLUB, just to name a couple more examples.

Multiprotagonist works often result in Multiplot stories. Rather than driving the telling through the focused desire of a protagonist, either single or plural, these works weave a number of smaller stories, each with its own protagonist, to create a dynamic portrait of a specific society. PULP FICTION certainly displays the Multiplot at work well.

Also, as I’m sure you’re aware, the protagonist doesn’t need to be human. Bugs Bunny is the protagonist in Looney Tunes. Hamtaro is the protagonist in Hamtaro. Thomas the Tank Engine is a sentient train.

“Anything that can be given a free will and the capacity to desire, take action, and suffer the consequences can be a protagonist. It’s even possible, in rare cases, to switch protagonists halfway through a story. PSYCHO does this, making the shower murder both an emotional and formal jolt.”

Now let’s dive into the hallmark qualities necessary of all protagonists.

1. A Protagonist Is a Willful Character

“Other characters may be dogged, even inflexible, but the protagonist in particular is a willful being. The exact quantity of this willpower, however, may not be measurable. Quality of willpower is as important as quantity.”

Thor is perhaps one of the most willful characters of the Avengers, second only to Captain America. His sense of justice and responsibility as protector of realms demands that he make bold decisions and act for the greater good. His desires are always clear because he is transparent, the polar opposite of his brother.

However, not all protagonists display their willpower. Take the character Groot, who may appear to be passive particularly in Endgame when he is going through his rebellious teen years. Yet when he offers a piece of himself to become the hilt of Thor’s new weapon Stormbreaker. It is clear that despite his outward apathy, he has not lost the desire to assist his friends and stop Thanos.

McKee cautions us that:

“The truly passive protagonist is a regrettably common mistake. A story cannot be told about a protagonist who doesn’t want anything, who cannot make decisions, whose actions effect no change at any level.”

2. A Protagonist Has a Conscious Desire

In each of the Marvel films, Thor’s outward desires have been somewhere along the lines of “Protecting the Nine Realms.” The protagonist’s will impels a known desire. The protagonist has a need or goal, an object of desire, and knows it. For many characters, a simple, clear, conscious desire is sufficient.

3. The Protagonist May Also Have a Self-Contradictory Unconscious Desire

Thor’s outward desires have always been the altruistic “Protecting the Nine Realms,” but in his deep character, from the very first Thor film to Endgame, Thor has struggled to find himself worthy in the eyes of his father, of his people, and, at his very core, in the eyes of himself. In contrast to his outward desires that are self-sacrificial, deep down he has always felt the uncontrollable wish to be deemed “worthy,” not only by Mjolnir, but by his father, Loki, Jane, the people of the Nine that he wishes to serve, and ultimately by himself. Having grown up as the first son of the Allfather, the throne is his by default and everything in life has been handed to him. Yet he has always sought to prove his worthiness is not from birthright.

McKee states:

“The most memorable, fascinating characters tend to have not only a conscious but an unconscious desire. Although these complex protagonists are unaware of their subconscious need, the audience senses it, perceiving in them an inner contradiction. The conscious and unconscious desires of a multidimensional protagonist contradict each other. What he believes he wants is the antithesis of what he actually but unwittingly wants. What would be the point of giving a character a subconscious desire if it happens to be the very thing he knowingly seeks?”

Excluding his battle with the frost giants in Jotunheim at the beginning of the first Thor film when he was brash and immature, Thor has never gone against an enemy in order to prove his worthiness. When he fails to stop Thanos, he comes to the conclusion that he is worthless, and it is only thanks to Frigga that he realizes that not only is he still worthy; he has always been worthy.

4. The Protagonist Has the Capabilities to Pursue the Object of Desire Convincingly

“The protagonist’s characterization must be appropriate. He needs a believable combination of qualities in the right balance to pursue his desires. This doesn’t mean that he’ll get what he wants. He may fail. But the character’s desires must be realistic enough in relationship to his will and capacities for the audience to believe that he could be doing what they see him doing and that he has a chance for fulfillment.”

In the first Thor movie, Odin exiles his son to Earth until he has proved himself worthy as his successor to the throne. Thor, as brash and confident as he was at the start of the movie, convinces Jane and the audience that he will be able to retrieve Mjolnir immediately. This is proven not only by his unshakable confidence, but also by the way he destroys any and all opponents who stand in his way. The audience feels the same confidence as Thor, that it is just a simple matter of walking in and taking back what is rightfully his.

Yet to our dismay we see that he is not yet worthy when he is unable to regain Mjolnir.

5. The Protagonist Must Have at Least a Chance to Attain His Desire

“An audience has no patience for a protagonist who lacks all possibility of realizing his desire. The reason is simple: No one believes this of his own life. No one believes he doesn’t have even the smallest chance of fulfilling his wishes. But if we were to pull the camera back on life, the grand overview might lead us to conclude that, in the words of Henry David Thoreau, “The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation,” that most people waste their precious time and die with the feeling they’ve fallen short of their dreams. As honest as this painful insight may be, we cannot allow ourselves to believe it. Instead, we carry hope to the end.

Hope, after all, is not unreasonable. It’s simply hypothetical. ... We all carry hope in our hearts, no matter the odds against us. A protagonist, therefore, who’s literally hopeless, who hasn’t even the minimal capacity to achieve his desire, cannot interest us.”

When Thor is unable to retrieve Mjolnir and Loki tells him that his return to Asgard has been forbidden, he truly hits rock bottom and becomes hopeless. Both he and the audience feel that there is no way to realize his desire of returning home and taking the throne.

But then minutes later, both Jane and Dr. Selvig show up to rescue him from detention, and from there hope is found in his newfound friends.

6. The Protagonist Has the Will and Capacity to Pursue the Object of his Conscious and/or Unconscious Desire to the End of the Line, to the Human Limit Established by Setting and Genre.

“The art of story is not about the middle ground, but about the pendulum of existence swinging to the limits, about life lived in its most intense states. We explore the middle ranges of experience, but only as a path to the end of the line. The audience senses that limit and wants it reached. For no matter how intimate or epic the setting, instinctively the audience draws a circle around the characters and their world, a circumference of experience that’s defined by the nature of the fictional reality. This line may reach inward to the soul, outward into the universe, or in both directions at once. The audience, therefore, expects the storyteller to be an artist of vision who can take his story to those distant depths and ranges.”

Just look at the character development we see in Thor from the first movie to Endgame. An immature, hot-headed, entitled boy has matured into a man willing to make any sacrifice, to expend every last drop of sweat, blood, and power not to prove his strength, not even to prove his worth, but to restore balance and justice to the world.

7. A Story Must Build to a Final Action Beyond Which the Audience Cannot Imagine Another

“In other words, a film cannot send its audience to the street rewriting it. If people exist imagining scenes they thought they should have seen before or after the ending we give them, they will be less than happy moviegoers. We’re supposed to be better writers than they. The audience wants to be taken to the limit, to where all questions are answered, all emotions satisfied--the end of the line.

The protagonist takes us to this limit. He must have it within himself to pursue his desire to the boundaries of human experience in depth, breadth, or both, to reach absolute and irreversible change. This, by the way, doesn’t mean that your film can’t have sequel; your protagonist may have more tales to tell. It means that each story must find closure for itself.”

It’s 2020 and fanfiction is now mainstream. But not all fanfics are born from dissatisfactory endings. Rather, many of them are born because we yearn to fill in all of the little in-between moments and what-ifs that arise unbidden in our minds because of our love of the work and its characters.

While I wonder how Thor will continue his life without Asgard, without his people, and most of all, without Loki, a sojourn seems like the best way for a man who has grown up within the confines of court decorum and lofty expectations to find out who he wants to be. And most importantly, Thor has come to terms with the fact that he is not meant to be a leader, and that he is worthy--not necessarily of the throne or of anyone else’s respect/love/loyalty--but that he is worthy of self-respect. To me, this is a satisfactory ending for his character in MCU.

8. The Protagonist Must Be Empathetic; He May or May Not Be Sympathetic

“Sympathetic means likable. Tom Hanks, for example, in his typical role: The moment he steps on screen, we like him. We’d want him as a friend, family member, or lover. He has an innate likability and evoke sympathy. Empathy, however, is a more profound response.

Empathetic means “like me.” Deep within the protagonist the audience recognizes a certain shared humanity. ... There’s something about the character that strikes a chord. In that moment of recognition, the audience suddenly and instinctively wants the protagonist to achieve whatever it is that he desires.”

To be honest, as a MASSIVE Thor fan, the first two movies stayed pretty true to the traditional comic Thor, who was serious, spoke in Ye Olde Englishe, and was such a lofty, justice-driven hero that he was hard to relate to. The Thor of the first two movies wasn’t exactly for everyone.

However, his complex relationship with Loki is what, in my opinion, managed to make him and Loki in particular empathetic to the audience. To love someone while knowing they are poison, to continue giving them chances when you know full well that it will likely end up harming you, and yet still refusing to give up hope on them, is a bitter battle that many of us face.

Ragnarok in particular is what cemented Thor’s empathy, but also his sympathy more than anything else. They dropped all of the old-timey speak, got downright silly, and let Hemsworth’s comedic talents shine through to brilliant effect.

Not only did Ragnarok make Thor one of the most beloved characters in MCU, it also shows Thor’s acceptance of Loki for the trickster that he is. He no longer desires to “fix” Loki, and Loki, who desires acceptance more than anything, finds a new respect for his brother. This makes Loki’s death all the more poignant later, when it seems that the two brothers have finally become able to coexist.

On Audience Bond

“The audience's emotional involvement is held by the glue of empathy. If the writer fails to fuse a bond between filmgoer and protagonist, we sit outside feeling nothing. Involvement has nothing to do with evoking altruism or compassion. We empathize for very personal, if not egocentric, reasons. When we identify with a protagonist and his desires in life, we are in fact rooting for our own desires in life. ... The gift of story is the opportunity to live lives beyond our own, to desire and struggle in a myriad of worlds and times, at all the various depths of our being.

...Empathy, therefore, is absolute, while sympathy is optional. ... Likability is no guarantee of audience involvement; it’s merely an aspect of characterization. The audience identifies with deep character, with innate qualities revealed through choice under pressure.”

Thor had a weak audience bond in the first two Thor films, but Ragnarok changed everything. While I’m sad that we veered away from Ye Olde Speche version of him because I have a thing for that, and i will never ever forgive them for cutting his hair because I also have a thing for that, Ragnarok is one of the best Marvel films yet in my opinion because of how much it managed to make Thor empathetic to the audience.

Anyways, thanks for letting me use this post as an excuse to rant about Thor haha. I hope that using an example like him make these points clearer.

Source: McKee, Robert. Story: Substance, Structure, Style, and the Principles of Screenwriting. York: Methuen, 1998. Print

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2700fstreet · 6 years ago

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OPERA / 2018-2019

EUGENE ONEGIN

STUDENT GUIDE

Washington National Opera Open Rehearsal Music by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky Libretto by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky and Konstantin Shilovsky Based on the novel by Alexander Pushkin

School show: March 5

Teacher and Parent Guide: Eugene Onegin

Who’s Who

Main Characters

Eugene Onegin, a young Russian nobleman (baritone—a middle-range male voice) Tatiana, a wealthy young woman from the country (soprano—the highest female voice) Olga, her sister (mezzo-soprano—a middle-range female voice) Madame Larina, their mother (mezzo-soprano) Filippyevna, Larina’s servant and Tatiana’s nanny (mezzo-soprano) Vladimir Lensky, a poet, Onegin’s good friend, and Olga’s fiancé (tenor—the highest male voice) Prince Gremin (bass—the lowest male voice)

So, What’s Going On?

Outside of the opera house, Eugene Onegin lives a whole other life as one of the most celebrated pieces of Russian literature of all time. Written over a span of eight years by the eminent national author Alexander Pushkin, the unusual novel-in-rhyming-verse is equal parts satirical social commentary and pure, unadulterated nostalgia. Its central tragic love story (boy meets girl, boy snubs girl only to discover, too late, he actually loves her) is about as good as dramatic irony gets, and its heroine, Tatiana, is viewed by many as the ultimate moral ideal—a perfect example of grace and dignity under pressure.

Act 1

The Russian countryside: Larin Estate, early 1800s.

Meet the Larin sisters. These two ladies couldn’t be more different—Tatiana (tah-tee-YA-nah) is dreamy and loves to read, Olga (OHL-gah) is feisty and likes to dance…you get the idea—but neither of them can resist a good song. Together with their mother, Madame Larina (lah-REE-nah), they celebrate the fall season along with a chorus of servants preparing for harvest.

Enter Eugene Onegin and his friend, a poet named Vladimir Lensky (LEHN-ski). At just under 20 years old, former city dweller Onegin is the new owner of a nearby estate (thanks to an inheritance). But Onegin is bored. With everything. Books, parties, polite society…nothing seems to please him. Least of all, women. Still, he agrees to visit the Larin sisters with Lensky, who’s happily engaged to Olga.

Onegin does Lensky the favor of entertaining Tatiana while the lovebirds flirt among the Larin woods. And while Onegin thinks Tatiana is somewhat interesting, he doesn’t find her captivating enough to give up his bachelor ways.

But here comes the first twist: After just one conversation, Tatiana is instantly and permanently smitten with the cynical and distant Onegin. (Yup, you read that right.)

A short time later, a sleepless Tatiana impulsively decides to write an impassioned letter to Onegin, pouring out her heart on paper and confessing her undying love, claiming her future is now in his hands.

Take a listen…

Tatiana completes her letter to Onegin and considers her fate. Listen for the repeated melody that descends the musical scale and pay attention to how it transforms over the course of the scene. Also, listen to how Tatiana’s voice rises to impressive heights when she’s feeling hopeful and sinks down low when she sings about Onegin’s possible rejection.

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Tatiana asks her nanny, Filippyevna (fee-LEEP-nyehv-nah), to help her deliver the letter to Onegin and, for days, waits anxiously for his reply.

When he finally does respond, things don’t go well.

Deciding to break the news to her face to face, Onegin returns to Tatiana’s estate and does his best to let her down gently. But his “It’s not you, it’s me” approach falls short when he implies that, though he’s attracted to her, he’d soon grow tired of her. Arrogantly dismissing her love as youthful folly, he cautions her to control her emotions. (Yeah, it’s pretty brutal.)

Take a listen…

Onegin tells Tatiana he’s not the man for her. Check out how the lightly swirling wind instruments (think flute and clarinet) and Onegin’s balanced phrases (with very few high or low extremes) are used to signify how smooth and callous he is in contrast to Tatiana’s earlier anguish.

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Act 2

A few months later, Onegin unwisely lets Lensky drag him to a dance in honor of Tatiana’s name day (a Russian Orthodox tradition that’s sort of like a birthday party). Onegin equally unwisely asks Tatiana to dance, and as soon as they’re spotted together, gossipy whispers are heard among the crowd.

Take a listen…

Country high society gathers at the Larin Estate for a ball. During this catchy waltz, listen for the way the chorus sings its own melodies instead of following the main dance tune. This helps achieve the effect that the party guests are gossiping under their breath while live music plays in front of them.

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As the guests wonder aloud if the conceited Onegin is good enough for Tatiana, Onegin decides he’s had it. Annoyed at Lensky for bringing him in the first place, Onegin resolves to flirt shamelessly with Olga for revenge.

Olga and Onegin get a bit too close during the next few waltzes, and Lensky is frustrated and confused. He demands Olga save the next dance for him, but she announces she plans to dance with Onegin one more time to punish Lensky for being overly jealous.

The flirting between Olga and Onegin continues during a French poet’s performance of a song for Tatiana, and Lensky is beside himself. In front of the entire ballroom, he denounces Onegin as an evil seducer of women and challenges him to a duel (…yikes). Realizing he’s gone too far but still wanting to save face, Onegin accepts.

Take a listen…

Lensky recalls happier times with Olga while contemplating what the duel holds in store. Listen for the brief interlude where the music suddenly sounds more hopeful and calm. Paradoxically, this is when Lensky considers what the world would be like without him. Why do you think the composer chose to have such peaceful music accompany such grim lyrics?

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Just before dawn, the two men meet in the snowy countryside. After briefly recollecting how close they once were and how angry and bitter they’ve become, they take aim and fire… and Lensky falls to the ground dead.

Act 3

Moscow: some years later.

Onegin, haunted by the memory of Lensky, has tried to bury his sorrows in travel. Wandering aimlessly, he’s arrived in Moscow hoping for some distraction (good luck with that, buddy).

At a ball in the city—much more upscale than the country dance at the Larin Estate—he runs into Prince Gremin (GREH-min), a relative of Onegin’s who’s recently been married to…wait for it…Tatiana. Onegin is shocked to discover Tatiana isn’t at all like he remembers; where she once seemed simple and naive, she now appears regal and mature. Even more strange? She barely seems to remember him.

And here’s the second twist: Onegin finds this newer, more self-possessed Tatiana irresistible. That’s right, now that she’s avoiding him, he’s fallen hard…and he’s completely aware of the cruel irony.

Determined to take one final stab at happiness, Onegin decides to write Tatiana his own letter in the hopes of winning her back.

But will his words be enough to undo the damage he’s done? Can Tatiana forget what’s passed and run away with him? Will first love triumph over honor?

Good to Know

Picture this: A well-meaning but slightly misguided young woman writes a love letter to a successful man. He’s flattered, but rejects her. Later, though, he recognizes his actions toward the young woman were less than kind, and, in an effort to make amends, asks the young woman to spend her life with him.

Sound familiar?

If you’re thinking this is a replay of the opera summary you’ve just read, you’re wrong. (But nice try.) It’s actually the story of what was going on behind the scenes when the opera was composed.

When a singer friend of Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky (cheye-KOFF-skee, 1840–1893) suggested the composer write an opera based on Eugene Onegin, the iconic Russian novel by Alexander Pushkin (POOSH-kin, 1799–1837), Tchaikovsky thought it was a “curious” but risky idea. Yet once he read the book, he found himself inexplicably drawn to Pushkin’s innocent heroine and the novel’s straightforward themes of young life and love—so much so, that he decided to get composing right away. This was perhaps in part because, only weeks before, Tchaikovsky had himself received a love letter much like the one Tatiana writes to Onegin in the story. And, like Onegin, Tchaikovsky had chosen to distance himself from his young admirer, Antonina.

But (also kind of like Onegin) Tchaikovsky changed his mind. His courtship with Antonina was complicated and tumultuous, and yet—perhaps inspired by his deep respect for Tatiana’s character—Tchaikovsky eventually proposed marriage. The date of Tchaikovsky’s proposal and the composition of Tatiana’s famous “Letter Scene” came within days of each other. Antonina accepted. The marriage didn’t last long, but the opera remains a success to this day.

Learning to Listen

Going to the opera means you’ll have to start listening in a new way if you want to take in everything the music and the voices have to offer. And guess what? This is less difficult than it sounds.

Try thinking of opera singing as its own type of language or speech. When we’re speaking, our emotions can change the way our voices sound from moment to moment—and one word can have a thousand different meanings depending on how we say it (loudly, softly, quickly, slowly, with a high- or low-pitched voice, etc.). The same is true for the characters in an opera. Each voice you’ll hear will have its own special flavor depending on who the character is and what he or she is saying.

Tatiana, for example, is a shy young woman with a very romantic streak. Her voice, therefore, will be on the higher side (to provide a clue that she’s innocent and wistful) but will occasionally soar above the orchestra (to represent her passionate hopes and dreams). Her singing will also sound weightier and more dramatic when we meet her as a mature woman in Act 3.

Onegin, on the other hand, is a brooding young aristocrat with a serious attitude problem. His darker baritone voice (a departure from the typical heroic sound that’s usually represented by the higher-voiced tenor) indicates he’s a bit more confident and experienced than the standard romantic lead. His short, elegant phrases also tend to suggest his character is mostly calm and in control.

When in doubt about how a character is feeling or what they’re thinking, always pay close attention to exactly how they sound. (The instruments in the orchestra will give you hints as well.)

Check This Out…

In this production of Eugene Onegin, the title character is often seen alone on stage. What clues, if any, do you think this device gives you about his character? Does it force you to look at him in a new way? Do you believe Onegin is a different man in private than in public?

Both Pushkin’s story and Tchaikovsky’s opera pay special attention to the contrast between rural and urban lifestyles. How do the sets and costumes in this production help remind you which scenes take place in the country and which take place in the city? And does the music take on a different quality once the action moves to Moscow? (Hint: Listen for the lively waltz music in Act 2 versus the more syncopated dance—known as a polonaise (pohl-oh-NAISE)—in Act 3.)

The director of this Eugene Onegin opted to have the end of Act 2 feed directly into the beginning of Act 3. What effect, if any, do you think this has on the audience? Does the upbeat, frenzied music at the start of Act 3 help you forget Lensky’s death in Act 2? Or does it make the aftermath of his murder feel that much worse?

Onegin’s pompous and restrained singing style goes completely out the window the moment he realizes he’s in love with Tatiana. Does his aria at the end of Act 3’s ballroom scene recall the scene in which Tatiana writes her infamous love letter? How so?

Think About This…

Tchaikovsky excelled at hummable melodies (if you don’t believe us, just think about The Nutcracker or Swan Lake for a second), and, in the mid-to-late nineteenth century, memorable tunes often made several returns throughout an opera. Can you identify any recurring musical themes in Eugene Onegin? If so, why do think they repeat themselves when they do? Does their recurrence cause you to remember a specific character or event? (Hint: Listen closely to Tatiana’s “Letter Scene” in Act 1 and Lensky’s solo aria in Act 2; melodies from both of these pieces will show up more than once.)

Throughout the novel of Eugene Onegin, Pushkin made no secret of the fact he loved and admired his heroine, Tatiana. Tchaikovsky likewise found himself “in love with her image” (as in, moved by her plight) and ended up honoring her with a near-20-minute solo in his opera. Why do you think Tatiana inspires so much affection? Do you agree with her choices at the start of the opera? What about at the end?

Lensky’s aria in Act 2 has been regarded as one of the opera’s most crucial moments since the piece debuted in 1879. Beyond the melancholy musical themes that cascade downward (as if the singer were sighing), the aria—and the Pushkin verse that inspired it—also tackles the age-old subjects of fleeting youth, impending death, and what happens when a person dies. Do the lyrics of this aria remind you of any other literary or musical works?

Take Action: Bring the Letter Back

Letters clearly play a major role in Eugene Onegin just as they did in Tchaikovsky’s real life (in addition to his correspondence with his fiancée, Tchaikovsky struck up a literary relationship with a woman who would become his long-time friend and patron, but who would refuse to meet him in person). In the opera, Tatiana and Onegin each serve as both writer and receiver of a painfully honest letter—and the results are entirely mixed. And with good reason. A long-form letter acts as a window into another person’s emotions and can leave both writer and reader feeling exposed.

But that’s not always a bad thing.

In the age of texting and Twitter, it’s become less and less common to express yourself using more than a few characters, words, or sentences. Why not try and break that 280-character barrier and explore writing about your feelings over several paragraphs…or even pages?

Pick a current topic, news story, or cause you’re passionate about and construct a long letter (we’re talking over 500 words) about why it moves you or why it holds your interest. Don’t be afraid to dig deep and expose your innermost thoughts on the matter. Dive into the subject and look at it from as many angles as possible. Try and put down on paper exactly how it makes you feel and why. (Extra points if you write it out by hand instead of type it.)

If you’re comfortable, share your letter with friends and family, or take things a step further and send it to a local legislator or journalist who you think might be willing to hear your opinion on an important issue.

EXPLORE MORE

Go even deeper with the Eugene Onegin Extras.

All photos by Todd Rosenberg for the Lyric Opera of Chicago

Writer: Eleni Hagen

Content Editor: Lisa Resnick

Logistics Coordination: Katherine Huseman

Producer and Program Manager: Tiffany A. Bryant

David M. Rubenstein Chairman

Deborah F. Rutter President

Mario R. Rossero Senior Vice President Education

Timothy O’Leary General Director

Francesca Zambello Artistic Director

Major support for WNO is provided by Jacqueline Badger Mars.

David M. Rubenstein is the Presenting Underwriter of WNO.

WNO acknowledges the longstanding generosity of Life Chairman Mrs. Eugene B. Casey.

WNO's Presenting Sponsor

This performance is made possible by the Kimsey Endowment; The Morris and Gwendolyn Cafritz Foundation and the U.S. Department of Education.

Major support for educational programs at the Kennedy Center is provided by David M. Rubenstein through the Rubenstein Arts Access Program.

#opera #eugeneoneginat2700f

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danyka-fendyr · 7 years ago

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Scar Tissue Chapter 2: Dynamic Du-OH- A Sudden Realization

A/N: I’m posting this without editing because I hate myself. I will eventually come back and fix my many sins. Tagging @writingtheworks the works again. Do I think that Bruce Wayne invites his butler to family dinners? Yes, yes I do, and Gotham’s snooty societal standards can’t stop me or him. Take that you elitists. Rorie was exhausted. You really couldn’t blame her. She’d been listening to Jason monologue Romeo and Juliet repeatedly for about an hour now. She loved her best friend, but she was ready to stab Shakespeare. She understood this was his masterpiece, but did he have to do this to her?

“Jay, I promise you, you will get the part. The first 5 times, heck, the first 10 times, this was the most beautiful performance I had ever seen in my life,” I told him.

Jason broke character, collapsing out of a dramatic pose, arm extended, head held up, looking to an imaginary balcony.

“You cried the first time,” he said, grinning.

Rorie had never seen someone so pleased over her tears. ...Well, okay, that wasn’t necessarily completely true, but she’d fought the Joker, alright? He was pretty sick, and not in the good way.

“Yes, because it was amazing. We’ve been over this. You are amazing,” she said.

Jason blushed under the praise, his neck, cheeks and ears tinting pink. When Jason blushed, he blushed with his whole head. It was sort of cute. Or at least, Rorie assumed it would be cute if you were like, into that kind of stuff. Rorie, of course, was not.

“Anyway, you should try to get some sleep. We have patrol tonight. Plus, you wouldn’t want to look burned out for your audition. It’s no good having a Romeo who looks sleep deprived,” Rorie tried to reason with him.

“What if he’s sleep deprived because he’s been up all night thinking about his Juliet, and how she refuses to audition, despite Alfred’s best efforts,” Jason teased.

“And you. Don’t forget you,” Rorie sighed.

Alfred and Jason hadn’t gotten off her back about this since they first started holding auditions for Romeo and Juliet. Rorie refused on the principle that the characters made a long series of stupid decisions ending in a tragedy that could have been completely avoidable. Jason had countered with the fact that he had caught her reading it out loud, rather passionately, mind you, when they had been assigned the story for English class. It wasn’t Rorie’s fault that the story was still emotionally compelling, despite entirely lacking logic. Juliet admittedly had some pretty lines.

“This is too cliché. Why couldn’t the school play be something prettier, like Wuthering Heights?” Rorie objected.

“Your obsession with Wuthering Heights will never end, will it?” Jason asked.

“The writing is beautiful Jason!” Rorie cried, more passionate even then when she was playing the part of Juliet.

“Maybe if you get the lead role this year they’ll choose it next year. You could get friendly with the Mrs. Dowly, convince her it would be a good idea.” Jason carefully dangled the carrot in front of his prey’s face.

There was a pregnant pause while Rorie considered.

“You really think so?” she questioned, shooting him an uncertain, slightly untrusting look.

Jason nodded, his enthusiasm making the gesture comical so that he resembled a bobble-head. “Absolutely! Mrs. Dowly always considers how her leads feel.”

Jason would know. He was the theater teacher’s pet, and had been the lead many, many times. All the other theater nerds were jealous of him, if they didn’t absolutely hero worship him (something Rorie found ironically humorous, considering their nightlife).

Rorie sighed, the sound deeply resigned. In contrast, Jason whooped.

“I will only be auditioning,” she warned him.

“Absolutely,” Jason said.

“You will in no way try to convince Mrs. Dowly to show me any kind of special favor.”

“Of course not.” More bobble-headedness, this time a vigorous shake, like he was a wet dog.

“If I do, by some miracle, get the part, you will not gloat, tell me you knew it, or anything of the sort.”

At this, Jason pouted. Rorie glared.

“Can’t I be proud?” He gave her the puppy dog eyes.

He gave her the puppy dog eyes. Jason knew she couldn’t resist the puppy dog eyes.

“Fine. A little pride. But none while we’re in school!” Rorie caved.

“Yay!” Jason chirped, wrapping his arms around her, trapping hers by her side.

Rorie pouted, and Jason celebrated. It was at this moment that Bruce walked in, Alfred following closely behind with a curious expression on his face.

“What’s going on here?” There was a tone of deep, rich amusement to Bruce’s voice, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards in what was usually about as close as he came to a smile (unless he was playing the role of ‘Brucie Wayne’).

“Rorie’s going to audition for the school play!” Jason cheered.

“With conditions!” Rorie added, seeing the look of excited shock on Alfred’s face and the knowing approval on Bruce’s.

“Well, miss, I suppose we’ll have to get you in shape!” Alfred declared.

“Oh no.”

“O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name. Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I’ll no longer be a Capulet.”

“Wonderful, miss! The way you sigh it out is beautiful. Very wistful. Now if you could just make it a little bit less breathy,” Alfred instructed.

Rorie puffed a sigh, and Jason tried not to laugh at her. She looked frustrated. Not as frustrated as she could be, since she wasn’t doing math, but her hair was messy and her posture slumped, face red from trying to hold back an oncoming temper tantrum. Alfred had this tendency to sometimes work out the details a little too much when it came to Shakespeare, or really any kind of play or production. He was a man of the theater indeed.

Jason decided Rorie might need a rescue.

“Maybe I could work with her for a bit Alfred. You could take a break, maybe make some snacks?” he suggested, knowing Alfred would never leave drama without a specific task and purpose.

“Cookies?” Rorie asked, a forlorn hope swimming in her eyes.

“Ah! Of course! You lot do look as though you could use something to munch on. It will raise the spirits!” Alfred clapped his hands, looking as invigorated as he always did when he was allowed within range of fine art. “I’ll prepare some fruit, and perhaps some cookies if I feel it is warranted.”

By that Jason was pretty sure Alfred meant that Rorie ate too many cookies and that she was going to get cavities. He was trying to be nice right now though, since it was obvious that Rorie was seriously considering dropping out of the school play.When she got the part, the entire household had been elated. Well, Jason and Alfred had been elated, and Bruce had been smugly pleased. Emphasis on smug. That was his adopted daughter, after all.Jason was pretty sure that if ‘Brucie Wayne’ wasn’t supposed to be keeping up his eligible bachelor status, Bruce would have posted his pride all over ever social media platform he knew how to work. Jason’s phone pinged, and he checked his notifications.

Scratch that. Bruce wasn’t able to keep it in anymore now that he had not one, but two children in theater. He had just made the dorkiest post Jason had ever seen in his life on Twitter.

“So proud of @jtodd and @roreo for scoring roles in the school play! I look forward to seeing them play Romeo and Juliet, respectively. If you have the time, come down to @gothamacademy and watch. #Illbesittingfrontrow”

Jason hoped none of the other kids at school saw that. Jason knew every one of the other kids at school had seen that, even the ones who weren’t theater geeks. Jason was pretty sure any kind of a reputation he had was gone now.

“Oh no,” Rorie groaned.

“Oh no what, Miss?” Alfred said, poking his head into the room at the first sound of oncoming disaster.

Rorie extended her phone to him, letting him see the tweet Jason himself had just been looking at.

“All the kids at school will see this, Alfred! We’re done for.” Rorie exchanged a look of horror with Jason.

Alfred looked thoughtful.“We shall see, miss.”

And see they did.

Arriving at school the next day, Rorie did her utmost to go incognito. Sunglasses and a dark hoodie obscured her figure, and she kept her head bowed as she walked through the halls. Jason didn’t bother with this. His strategy was to not show any kind of weakness.

He strutted down the halls, trying to appear more confident than ever before, his hair slicked back with gel he had stolen from Bruce a while back and his favorite leather jacket on. He would have been wearing sunglasses, but Rorie stole his coolest pair.

As it turned out, Jason’s strategy worked better, unfortunately for Rorie. Some of the boys tried to pick on him, it was true, but he just ignored them. If you looked closely enough, you might be able to see that he was riled up, but only if you knew him well. He kept his anger close and in check. He could always exact revenge later if he still thought they were worth it.

Rorie was taunted mercilessly though, since she reacted a little volatiley to the whole thing. The second someone had insinuated that her rich daddy bought her spot, she was spitting words that were dangerously close to obscenities, a seething pot ready to boil over. Jason had swept in several times that day to save her when it looked like she might not be able to control herself. In thanks, she gave him his sunglasses back.

Now, Rorie was sitting in the library, the only place where people would leave her alone, it seemed. She was reading through Jane Eyre again, trying to distract herself from the snake’s nest of anxiety, self-doubt, and bitter, petty rage boiling in her head. It wasn’t working that well.

It worked less well when Amanda Bixby sat next to her. Rorie didn’t dislike Amanda particularly, but she also didn’t particularly like her. Amanda was...Well, Amanda was a bit of an airhead. She didn’t mean to be, but she just happened to be that one girl that never thought about anything but makeup and boys. There was nothing particularly wrong with this mindset, but it simply didn’t mesh with Rorie’s more practical attitude.

“So, Jason’s like, your brother, right?” Amanda said, her tone friendly yet suspiciously slimy sounding to Rorie.

“Yeah, I guess. More of a best friend, really.” Rorie shrugged.

“But you’re super close, yeah?” Amanda confirmed.

“Well yeah. We live in the same house.” Rorie didn’t feel it necessary to mention that they had shared a bathroom until last year when she had demanded Bruce let her have her own.

Rorie was prepared for a plethora of things. Amanda was into theater, so it was entirely possible that she was hoping Rorie would be able to share some of Jason’s acting secrets with her. Or, it could be that she needed help with her English homework, something Jason also excelled in. As it turned out, Rorie was woefully unprepared for what actually happened.

“So what kind of girl does he usually go for?” Amanda asked.

Rorie choked a little bit. “What?”

“Like, does he have a type?” She twirled a strand of long brown hair around her finger.

“Umm….I don’t really know. He doesn’t talk to me about girls,” Rorie said, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable.

“Yeah, but I mean, you’ve got to know something about his girlfriends. Are they tall? Short? Blondes, brunettes? C’mon, gimme something here,” Amanda said.

In truth, Rorie was unsure that Jason had ever even had a girlfriend. He was only 15 after all. 15 was a bit young for a girlfriend, wasn’t it? Rorie felt like 15 was young.

“Why do you ask? I mean, it’s not like Jason’s particularly attractive or anything.” Rorie laughed nervously.

“Are you kidding me? He’s a total dreamboat. All the girls know it. Plus, have you ever seen his arms when he takes off that leather jacket?” Amanda bit her lip in a way that Rorie definitely did not like. “I bet he’s ripped. Not to mention that he’s tall. And he’s only going to get taller you know.”

Amanda was clearly not in the building anymore. Her eyes had glazed over dreamily, and Rorie took that as her cue to be anywhere but where she presently was. Sneakily, she made her escape, mumbling under her breath about some urgent play preparation she had to do.

Rorie raced out of the library so fast it was almost superhuman, forgetting to put her sunglasses back on as she went. They were perched on top of her head when she crashed into someone, causing them to clatter to the floor, and her to nearly follow. Fortunately for her, someone had good reflexes and caught her, a warm, firm hand holding her back and pressing her against a lean, muscular torso.

“I am so sorry, you have no idea how mortified I am, rea-” Rorie stopped short when she realized that the person who was holding her was rather familiar.

She pulled back, peering into their face to find none other than Jason Todd himself. Rorie wanted to say “speak of the devil,” but she was a bit distracted at the moment, because at it turned out, it would seem that Amanda Bixby was right. Jason Todd was a dreamboat.Rorie was unsure how she hadn’t noticed it before. It wasn’t like anything had significantly changed between now and an hour again, when Rorie had last seen Jason. However, now that it had been mentioned to her, he had very nice, well-defined cheekbones, a strong jaw, incredibly long black lashes, and the prettiest pair of blue eyes Rorie had ever seen in her life. She swallowed heavily as she realized that, prior to knowing who was holding her up, she had been appreciating their toned body structure as well.

“Careful there, Rorie. You’ll get hurt.” Jason smiled at her, revealing a blinding white set of perfectly straight teeth that seemed intent on sinking themselves into Rorie’s heart.

Oh no. Oh no.

Opening night had finally come, and Jason was bouncing around with excitement. He had no reason to worry. He had done this dozens of times before, and he had every confidence in his leading lady.

He was watching her right now, mumbling her lines under her breath and coughing as hairspray was applied rigorously to her carefully created Shakespearean hair.

“Oh, Romeo, oh Romeo,” Rorie said, rocking back and forth slightly, to the deep consternation of the girl working on her hair.

“Actually,” Jason said, watching himself appear in the mirror behind her, already in full costume, hair done, “it’s ‘Oh Romeo, Romeo’.”

“I’m gonna fail. I’m gonna fail in front of everyone, and they’ll all laugh, and this will be the end of my acting career, and I’ll have to switch schools.” Her eyes, previously closed, snapped open. “I’ll have to switch schools Jason. I’ll have to go to a boarding school in Scandinavia where nobody knows my name.”

“You’ll be fine,” Jason reassured her, placing both his hands on her shoulders and shooing the irate amateur hairdresser off.

“But what if I’m not?” Rorie asked desperately.

“Then I’ll fail even more epically. I’ll say lines from Napoleon Dynamite instead, and then I’ll trip and fall on my face, and then I’ll roll over and start making snow angels, except there will be no snow, at which point I will have made my first mistake as it is obvious that one cannot make snow angels without no snow.”

“That is the stupidest thing you’ve ever said to me.” Rorie dead-panned.

“See! It works!” Jason grinned broadly, bouncing on the balls of his feet. Rorie, on her part, tried to look slightly less miserable.

“You’re on in 5,” someone informed him as they passed by.

Rorie gave him an unsure look, seeking a few last moments of reassurance.

Jason walked around until he was facing her, crouching so he could look her right in the eye. “You’re gonna be great, don’t worry.”

He smoothed down a few stray pieces of her hair, giving her one last strong, certain smile before heading to the wings. It was showtime.

Acts 1-4 went flawlessly. Despite her nerves, Rorie was a natural on stage. She sounded like Shakespeare had written her himself, and Jason was matching her ever move. They were a perfect pair, naturally, and they had the kind of trust most lead actors could probably only wish for. This came as a package deal with the many shared near-death experiences.

It was Act 5 where things began to get sticky. Specifically, the death scene. Everything had been going fun. They had rehearsed this scene in bits and pieces plenty of times before, and everything was timed perfectly. The grief they portrayed was stunningly believable, the laboured breaths and the hasty tears working together to paint a picture of gut-wrenching agony. Jason had caught a glimpse of Dick crying in the audience.

Specifically, it was Act 5, scene 3, line 125 that was giving Jason a good deal of trouble. He had said all the lines leading up to it, and now he found himself agonizingly close to a “dead” Rorie with the task of kissing her.

He had known, somewhere in the back of his mind, that he would have to kiss her for this performance. Maybe some tiny part of him had even looked forward to it, entirely without his knowledge or consent. They hadn’t practiced this particular scene, however, and Jason had conveniently forgotten about it until now. Or rather, he had been making a conscious effort not to think about it at all.

He hovered over her, his mouth inches away from hers. She was so warm underneath him, hair splayed out and hands neatly folded over her stomach, eyes lightly shut. Jason tried to steady his heart rate, failing miserably, and after running through a plethora of alternative scenarios in his mind, each more wild than the last, he determined that he would just have to do it. If she hated him afterwards, there was nothing he could do about it.

Gently, he connected their lips. It was like a revival. Her lips were soft and warm against his, and she tasted like oranges and cinnamon. Her body, almost unconsciously, craned into him, kissing back so softly and subtly that the audience couldn’t have noticed, but Jason most definitely did. Without thinking, one hand reached into her hair, cradling her head as he kissed her like Romeo would kiss Juliet, like a man would kiss his lover with his last dying breath, slightly clumsy, but intimate and gentle, with a fervor Mrs. Dowly had probably not foreseen.

He broke away, rushing through his poison scene and dying as quickly as possible. It felt fitting, since he was pretty sure he was already dead. Then, it was Rorie’s turn. What she did next was not entirely expected.

She worked her way through her lines with an untold urgency, weeping at the sight of her Romeo lying dead below her. Her performance was like nothing Gotham Academy had ever seen before, as emotionally charged as it was. And then, he broke from script. She kissed Jason.

It was similar to the first time, but less clumsy, and Jason nearly broke character out of sheer shock. He didn’t have the time though, with the brevity of the kiss. It was hard and fast, and then she stabbing herself with a fake knife as ripples of surprise waved through the audience.

The last few scenes were played out, and everyone took their final bows. Jason could see Dick sobbing at this point, overcome by emotion. Jason felt similarly overcome, unsure of what exactly had just happened. He rushed his way backstage, finding Rorie in the mess that was the closing of opening night. He grabbed her arm, whirling her around.

“Rorie,” he breathed out her name, still stunned even now.

She turned pink, staring at her feet as she answered. “Yes.”

“You kissed me,” he stated.

“You kissed me first.”

“On script,” he said.

“Are you mad?” Now she looked up at him, twinges of hurt flecking her eyes and accenting an ocean of bright green worry and fear.

“Am I mad? No, I’m definitely no mad.” Now, Jason grinned. He grinned like a fool. “Just wondering if you’ll do it again.”

Rorie smiled shyly, starting to look as giddy as Jason now felt.“At least buy me dinner first,” she said, mischief in her eyes and tugging at her mouth as she shrugged in feigned nonchalance.

“I’m pretty sure dinner is on Bruce tonight, but if you think I’m not going to buy you dinner at the next available opportunity then you are very, very wrong,” Jason said.

Rorie laughed, reaching up to hug him in his favorite way, the only way he ever wanted to be hugged by her ever again.

“Deal, boy wonder,” she whispered in his ear.

Dinner was awkward. Dinner way very, very awkward.

It wasn’t that Bruce disapproved, after the two stumbled through an explanation of their budding relationship. It wasn’t that Alfred disapproved, or Dick, even. No. Horrifyingly, they were all delighted.

“What do you mean you knew?” Jason and Rorie shrieked in unison.

Bruce tried to bring the table back to some form of decorum, since Dick’s exclamation of, “I knew it!” and small victory dance coupled with Rorie and Jason’s indignant screams was slightly out of place in one of Gotham’s nicest restaurants.

“I mean, it was obvious. You two are always all blushy and cutesy around each other whenever I come over,” Dick explained, cutting into his steak.

“We are not!” Rorie protested, burying her face into her bouquet of brilliant red roses, of which it had turned the same hue.

Jason in turn felt like burying his face into the orchids he was currently holding for her, a gift from Dick. The roses were from Bruce, of course. Alfred had simply baked cookies back at home.

“I’m afraid you are, miss. It’s rather endearing, if it’s any comfort to you,” Alfred reassured.

“This is so embarrassing. You all knew?” Rorie said.

“And now the whole school knows, after that display.” Dick grinned. “You two got so lucky Mrs. Dowly didn’t tear you to pieces.”

As it happened, Mrs. Dowly had rather liked the show. She said that Rorie’s improv had been so impassioned Shakespeare should have written it into the original. Rorie had wilted into the very bottoms of her shoes, looking as though she were trying her best to melt into the floor.

A waiter came by to check on them as they were finishing up, Dick shoveling the last bites of his steak into his mouth.

“Any dessert?” he asked politely, no doubt with good intentions.

“No!” Jason and Rorie shouted.

The last thing they wanted was more awkward dinner conversation.

“It would seem not,” Bruce said, smiling his, “people are watching,” smile. “We’ll just have the bill.”

“Yes, sir.” The waiter ran off to retrieve the bill, leaving Jason and Rorie to suffer once more.

“So how long had you been thinking about that kiss scene, huh Jay?” Dick asked, waggling his eyebrows.

Jason groaned, his face turning red in that full-flush way that he had about him. Rorie, on the other hand, decided to change tactics. If you can’t beat’em, join’em.

“You know, it’s kind of cute when you do that,” she said.

“What?” Jason asked, confused and slightly alarmed.

“Blush. You do it with your whole head. Neck, face, ears. It’s cute.” Rorie shrugged, trying to hide her own blush.

“Ewww, this is officially too sweet for me now,” Dick said, feigning a gag.

“Please Dick, try to behave like an adult,” Bruce said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

The waiter came by and Bruce quickly paid in cash, clearly having come prepared for an outing with his children. Rorie could only guess how enormous the tip was.

“Alfred?” Bruce said, raising his eyebrows as he looked at the man.

“I have already informed the valet that the car is to be brought around, sir,” Alfred said.

“Thank goodness, because I could use a good night’s sleep,” Bruce said.

Rorie and Jason grinned at each other. Bruce Wayne might get 8 hours, but his alter ego never did. It was time for the Bat to roam the streets of Gotham, Robin and Batgirl at his side. It was time to be a hero.

#jason todd #jason todd fic #jason todd x oc #scar tissue #batman #batfam #gotham #batfamily

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