#the misogyny is blatant and gross and they should be ashamed

[dragondream-ing]

Anyone with a modicum of reading comprehension knows GRRM’s message in F&B is, in large part, that misogyny = bad. It may sound obvious but it is actually crucial to make this point out loud, in fact louder than the naysayers. The shitshow gave cover to a bunch of losers who vocally and unapologetically spew their misogyny. They’re out here claiming that reinforcing and supporting sexist tropes is subverting them.

Show TG “arguments” summarized:

Alicent: pure, behaved as expected, duty and sacrifice, muh tradition

Rhaenyra: wh0re, should’ve r*ped her gay husband for pure-blooded legitimate children, used her vagina wrong, didn’t know her place

Not to mention they minimize book Alicent to an evil stepmother—another sexist af trope— because she was ambitious and ruthless. She was a schemer like Tywin and Roose and so many men in F&B and ASOIAF who are never described as one-dimensional. I’m sorry, a female character isn’t one-dimensional just because you can’t handle a woman that betrays and schemes and does evil. If you think making antagonistic women more moral and palatable is an improvement, I have news for you—that’s misogynistic af.

On top of that, we’ve all seen the vile things they say about Rhaenyra. They wish she died in childbirth, they call her fat and ugly, they relish the thought of her being subjected to intimate partner violence a la the shitshow, they salivate over the fact that her brother k!lls her because she dared to reject the notion that women can’t inherit.

It is hatred of women that do not perfectly conform in its baldest, most gleeful form, and these types think they should be safe from criticism because they’re aiming this loathing at fictional characters. Rhaenyra wasn’t even remotely a feminist, and in fact “conformed” in many ways, but the little bit she didn’t conform—that she had the audacity to believe she could be traditionally feminine and a mother and a lover and still be Queen in her own right—is enough for these people to wish death and abuse upon her. Because she’s not their perfect representation of a meek and dutiful woman, she deserves scorn, hatred, and violence. This is a sickness.

This level of hatred and the specifically gendered attacks don’t come from nowhere. Some people may be TG because they think the actors playing Aegon and Aemond are hot, or they aren’t doing anything more than consuming fast-food media, but there are enough people out there with hearts full of hatred for women and it shows. Then they come into the fandom and insist loud and proud that their vile interpretation is canon.

Like sweetie, you wouldn’t know canon if it smacked you upside the head, you’re just grasping so you can cover for the fact that you’re a misogynist. But we see you.

And yes, this was inspired by me seeing a thread of incredibly gross and sexist takes on Twitter.

[bunksun]

10-31-19 / Body Confiscated

I use to fantasize about Heroes a lot, it was my favorite show when I was in middle school, and I wanted Sylar to say all of these things because I had a crush on Zachary Quinto. I hoped he was a good person on the inside and just a victim of circumstance. He got really creepy in the last season though. Something else private I don’t even want to discuss. They’re basically making me say these things and it must be a coincidence I sound like him, but I wasn’t this aware of my situation when I was a kid. I was being abused and I was traumatized and not able to deal with it the way I wanted to. I feel like my inner child is dead because of this constant re-animating of my private thoughts by strangers. I don’t want to live like this ever again. I don’t want to go through this trauma anymore.

*I don’t represent filmmakers and a bunch of actors and actresses. I don’t even think it’s art sometimes. I want to provide real representation for all different sides of life to people who don’t feel like they fit into the spaces that were supposedly reserved for them. (It’s not a competition, these are just my goals. Ew.)*

Nobody knows what kind of boy I am. I have barely even been able to come out. I don’t feel like a citizen. Maybe I just wanted to date Zach in a discreet way or have a normal adult relationship. Why should I have to disclose our every conversation with “yeah, I had a crush on him when I was a kid.” That’s not my personality ! I still don’t know where he is. There’s nothing he doesn’t know, he has the information he needs to make a decision. I don’t want to be living in the presence of this hate either. If everyone knows, and knows that I’m just a random, innocent person, why is there no advocacy of my rights and why is no one breaking the rules to make sure I’m safe? There are no rules. Guilty people made up rules to create a context for harassment and stalking. I don’t want to take responsibility for that - it’s their fault and I need to seek legal reparations with as many guilty people as I can. Maybe everyone will face consequences, and if they don’t maybe we can come up with a disclaimer system so that anybody who realized what a sh*t choice they made can be identified, even though I’m sure they don’t think that’s a good idea! No questions here, only concerns.

It’s not activism to run around saying “don’t commit suicide,” or use your social media to talk about triggering stuff like that without warning. That’s not weird, that’s cruel. Especially to imply it with no emotion and with no confrontation. People need context for their emotions, not reasons to feel bad. It’s like they think any random stranger’s presence will help and that’s just not true. It’s even more insulting because they think they’re entitled to my psychology that way. Just no. This honestly doesn’t even feel like any of my business because they have ignored my struggle and what could be more degrading than that? It was fully their choice and it’s not my responsibility, it will never make sense to me, and not making sense = not being able to live with it. 

Mental health is important. I’m already traumatized and dealing with pre-existing issues. That entire part of my life is private because of the danger that it represents. Not because I’m trying to lie for anyone. That is so obvious by now it’s unacceptable and blatant violence for people to use my own life as leverage against me - and for what? I haven’t done anything wrong and this is all that I can do to help myself. Not just people either - famous people and professional people who should know better than to exploit someone. Definitely not someone like me, ever, and it just gets worse with time. I’m innocent and smart and I’ve earned everyone’s respect. I deserve boundaries and rights even to the most lowly coward. They’ve even confiscated my original blog, tried to offend me through insults, sexual references, etc. threats, sexually harassed me in public, followed me, discriminated against me. They’re putting me in danger, too, more than they already have. It’s disgusting. 

I never would have cared about the hype, Instagram, popular celebrities, whatever - before when it didn’t involve me, because I wasn’t famous, and I had my own experiences to draw from and those things informed my values and opinions. It was hard to come out that way and I think that I learned that celeb support does help people learn about themselves because it’s dignified representation. (Unless it’s not, so, let’s not manipulate people anymore?) I don’t think that this is what acceptable inclusion looks like and that would be the only thing to gain. If they want to interview criminals about what makes them judge victims of abuse or something, they need to do that on their own time and leave me out of it. I want nothing to do with those crude ideas. They shouldn’t be using me as a medium for their morbid interests - it’s already happened, I can see that. Stop making it worse. There’s no way they thought they were helping me and now they know they’re not. Misogyny is gross. I never saw a reason for us to fight, and I would have never protested that way and they’re basically just calling me weak which is pathetic. I’m desperate, so, it’s not like there’s no context for it which only means I’m still vulnerable. Not a crime. It’s not right to test people like that/about any of this. I’m traumatized yet their choices are senseless and cruel.

I don’t want to be in any relationship where I’m threatened and hated. Why is that complicated? I actually know why, so there’s a lot of my existence that’s being extorted and beaten up for no reason. It’s not going to become art and it’s not going to be entertainment. You are shunned.

Also at this point to have to wonder if anyone who cares/knows is actually concerned or not? That isn’t right and it’s been like that the entire time. I don’t know what this is contributing to because I’m not being respected or represented as an artist and activist. That makes drawing from the evidence a devastating process. That’s something I have to do for my sanity and for the sake of justice. Everybody does this when they go through something awful. I don’t know why no one will empathize with me, but I feel empathy and I feel pain and I can’t justify human torture.

If you were that stupid that you wanted to hate me for trying to be in the moment, I hope you’re embarrassed/ashamed and I think you’re an idiot, but it doesn’t change that I’m alone and traumatized and I don’t want to abandon my life and this could mean you. You can’t put terms and conditions on your relationship with someone out of judgment and fear when those are not real concerns because of that person. I don’t know why you would project your problems onto your only trusted friend, and someone who represents progress, equality and respect. Don’t be a thief. 

I need to recover and I want to be around people who support me and feel like I can be a part of society again. I might have PTSD but I’m not a fragile or violent person. Nothing about this has re-introduced me to society or anything similar. That’s the intention I feel with optimism, and it’s confusing. I know there’s nothing wrong with me. The entire motivation is dirty and weird and I want people to be transparent about everything. I feel isolated and abused. These people around me are gross. They are stalking me, there is no grey area and I don’t know why you would commit a crime and live in voluntary silence. I’m worried not just about what you’re doing, but what you want to represent and why you made the choices you did. The fact that this would privately validate anyone in some way is disturbing and not normal or healthy. Due process should have been a part of this! I didn’t deserve to be stalked and harassed, there is no excuse or justification, even that I can’t seek justice. WOW that is redundant and scary. These people are fear mongers and cowards. They’re perverts and they need to be identified. 

I’m not a hateful person and I don’t live for making judgments about others. These were serious crimes and trespasses against my rights/boundaries that I won’t recover from by complaining and I don’t want to live the pain because I have so, so extensively. I can’t describe it, I’m crippled by it. These are kids on college campuses, business-owners, blue collar-workers, they could be anyone and everyone in their lives is at risk and they are aware of the threat that represents as well. They’ve invaded my privacy and committed a crime and they’re justifying it to themselves every day, somehow. That’s not of interest to me - that’s an abuse of my human rights. I’m not an object or a puppet and I refuse to let my private information be open to interpretation and re-imagination by prejudiced bigots who have too much - and I have refused to let my body be used as a medium for sex abuse and violence. They don’t care. That’s a problem, not a conflict of interest. Unless these college students want to be represented by a rapist, they’re guilty of sexual violence, and not only should all of these people be facing consequences, these kids shouldn’t be allowed to finish school and they have no place invading others’ privacy, safety and manipulating everyone’s experience of life. I have not done this. I’m advocating for myself, I’m not guilty of anything conspiratorial or anything violent. Being victimized does not make me feel innocent, it makes me feel burdened. This is not what responsibility looks like - I am just a responsible person. It’s not a soapbox for people to express their opinions on. It needs to be over with!!!