#the lightning amnesia fic

[daffi-990]

What if …

Buck and Eddie got together days before the lightning strike and hadn’t told anyone yet (not even Chris), and when Buck wakes up he’s fine .. except he doesn’t remember that he and Eddie finally kissed and had the talk and promised each other forever.

But Eddie remembers.

Eddie remembers but Buck doesn’t and Eddie just .. he just doesn’t tell him. He’s scared and has all these feelings about the lightening and the memory loss and he talks it all out with Frank for weeks and when he’s finally ready to talk to Buck about it .. the graveyard scene happens.

So Eddie stays quiet and tries to move on. He tries with Marisol but his heart isn’t in it and so they break up and he decides to not date. To be alone because he loves Buck and will always love him. He’s his forever, even if he can’t have him the way he wants .. the way he briefly got a taste of.

And Buck is dating Natalia and things are .. fine. They get a couch and she stays over every now and then and things are fine. Except they’re not because something feels like it’s missing, and Eddie has this sadness in his eyes and Buck doesn’t know what’s wrong, and of course Eddie doesn’t want to talk about it.

And then one day Buck just remembers. He remembers everything and oh my god how could he forget?! How could he forget what Eddie tastes like? The way his eyes shone with tears of utter happiness and joy after their first kiss, their first “I love you”. How could he forget?

Cue Buck knocking on the Diaz front door at 11pm on a random Tuesday and of course it’s raining and Eddie opens the door and he looks tired but so soft and warm and like home and he says “Buck?” and Buck just starts crying.

“I remember”

And then they’re kissing and holding each other and crying but it’s okay. It’s better than okay because Buck remembers and he’s here. He’s home.

EDIT

I ended up writing this and it’s now a fully completed fic on AO3.

You can read it here 💛

[rookie-lou]

Forget-Me-Not, Whumptober day 26

Chapter 26: A life that Doc didn't remember

Doc faces his fear and goes into the guest room. Desperately trying to remember, he finds an unexpected box in his room.

[allisonreader]

I have a feeling that I’m going to need the sprints to actually finish my story/neaten it up, because I certainly don’t feel like just going and working on it by myself.

[altcvnningham]

canis major

adler x bell!reader

summary: adler doesn’t go back to berlin to forget, but he isn’t so eager to remember, either. after leaving you for dead on that clifftop in the arctic, he knows best to leave the past well alone. too bad that past seems to be alive and walking right in front of him; though where he wants to forget, it seems you’ve already beaten him to the punch. or; bell survives solovetsky and only has a hole in her head and amnesia to show for it. read on ao3

tags/cw: bell!reader, amnesia, light angst, referenced adlerbell, somehow bell survives the ending of cw, adler can't let shit go, adler is not capable of remorse but mayyybe a lil guilt?? dog symbolism always, no pairing yet but hopefully i continue this as a spicy drabble series idk wc: 2.7k

a/n: sooo this is my first fic for the cod fandom and the first fic i've posted online in a long time so hopefully this lil ramble suffices!! i've had adlerbell brainrot and wanted to get at least something out before bo6 ruins all of my headcanons so here's a snippet of something i hopefully find the motivation to continue into a mini series. enjoy :')

Sometimes, he goes back to Berlin.

Stumbling out of the muggy bar into the dank alleyway out the back, Adler fishes out a pack of cigarettes from the front of his jacket; two firm knocks of it against his palm before he plucks one out with his mouth, pockets the box, and flips open his lighter. The clink of the metal echoes into the empty around him, the sudden quiet suffused with the sounds of passing cars on the street, muffled laughter from inside the bar, and the distant barking of dogs. Strays.

The cigarette ignites, glowing a cherry red, and he gasps around the filter greedily. Upon exhale, he sighs.

Adler isn’t a sentimental man by any means. What little he clings to, he does so with a loose grip, less than happy but stolid enough to allow whatever else he deems unnecessary slip through his fingers. Places, people. Things. Memories. Tucks the important things- logic, rationality, work, duty- into orderly compartments at the forefront of his mind, archived and marked off ‘til he needs it, while the rest, the mess, gets done away with, thrown into the great black gorge of oblivion. Anything else that stays- more often than not a thorn in his side, an unbidden, wriggling tumour he can’t find let alone cut out- is sequestered to a dark aperture in the back of his mind, anchored deep where it can’t come back up. Yet somehow, some nights, they always do. The smell of his ex-wife’s hair. The day he got his scar. Vietnam. The lab. Solovetsky—

The next word, the name, forks across his mind like lightning, and he bites his tongue before he can think it. It sits at the back of his mouth, nestled like an aching cavity in his molars. A tremulous breath that he forces down with another drag of his cigarette. Out with the rest. Out with the rest.

The barking doesn’t cease. Dogs, a pair of them, he can hear a couple streets over. He pictures them from the gravelly register of their snarling- maybe German Shepherds, a Bullmastiff or a Rottweiler. Their fight enunciated by the violent rattling of chain-link fences, segregated, the only threshold that keeps teeth from necks.

But no, not a sentimental man. He tells himself that the itch to revisit Berlin every Summer is for superficial reasons, and by no means is renting out a shithole hotel room opposite a sewer-laden river considered a vacation from anything other than the luxuries he gorges himself mindlessly on at home- maybe this is to keep him humble, more than anything. It doesn’t do well to remind himself of old times, not when he’s lived the life he has. Remembering seldom accompanies itself with the bittersweetness of reminiscence, and the taste it leaves in his mouth is always acrid. He doesn’t miss Berlin any more than he misses that dismal safehouse, or that sterile room he wheeled you into, questioned- tortured- no, interrogated- well, he doesn’t care to remind himself of the picture. Or the person he strapped to the gurney. But he catches himself thinking back to the city divided more than he likes to admit, and for whatever ostensible reason it is that drags him back here, he relents to it every time.

He tells himself it’s the weather, the cool rain a nice reprieve from the scorching California heat. Or that the food is better, not so much overprocessed shit and sugars. Can take his coffee as black as he likes without the waitress turning her nose up about it and double-triple-checking if he’s sure. And it’s the people, maybe, who leave him well enough alone. Or the drinks. The views, some places. The- air.

Not like Arctic air. Not like—

The one dog’s snarl rips bloodcurdling through the night, all froth and venom, and as the chain-link fence screeches and judders in its rusted welding the other mutt quiets a moment. Cowers under the meaner dog’s ferocity. Then, like it had been wounded, it lets out a low, anguished howl, beast reduced to a scared little pup. Adler holds the smoke in his chest around a stifled breath anticipating a release. But the first dog just grumbles, the fence clinks, and there isn’t much noise after that.

But the quiet doesn’t last long- just as Adler drops his cigarette and snuffs it with a wrench of his heel, another sound resonates, yowling through the alley.

The grinding of tires upon wet asphalt crunches from just beyond the alleyway entrance. The streetlamp overhanging the entryway glares bright yellow as it bounces off of the garishly coloured taxi cab, pulling up to a groaning halt outside the bar.

He thinks nothing of it, pulling at the collar of his leather jacket. It’s getting cold, and he’s left his drink inside. Wouldn’t want to waste good beer. Adler turns, and makes for the door.

And you step out of the car.

A half-finished cigarette bounces on the sidewalk before you exit, the softened heel of your boot following soon after in a splash upon the flooded curb. Your German is rusty- always has been- but it’s easy enough to utter a quick and easy danke as you pull yourself up out of the cab. The door shuts with a slam, and you tilt your head back to gaze up at the sign above the bar- Der Fluss Lethe glaring in faded lightbox red- and you let out a contented sigh, your breath suspended in the frigid air. Pink, bitten fingers pluck at your gloves, fingerless faded green knit, shovelling them into your jacket pocket.

Adler’s fist is already curled around the handle of the back door as he clocks your presence in his periphery, a stranger like any other- but your image resembles the one that coagulates in the borders of old memory, the dried blood of you he hasn’t been able to wash his hands of since ‘81. Enough that he does a double take, his eyes wide behind tinted glasses, and he stops, his heart following suit.

He’s seen enough bodies in his time to fill the morgue in his mind twice over, and plenty ghosts to wander coldly among the unmarked graves. Vietnam alone is an unwinding cemetery stretching endless, catacombs along the inside of his skull, lined with what his old shrink would call remorse. Guilt. As if the feeling mattered. As if self-reproach could turn self-flagellation into something so incandescent as redemption. As if the bile in the back of his throat could bring back the dead.

And it couldn’t, because it isn’t… that’s not—

Bell.

It’s in the way you stand, your back rigid, that slight slouch to your shoulders, always dragged down upon you like they bore the weight of the whole world (and they did, once, do you remember?). The pelting of rain smacks off of the lapels of your jacket and ricochets like stars, caught in the light of the streetlamp overhead, but for all he knows or cares it could be raining diamond and all he sees is you- the wrinkling of your nose as you accommodate to the cold, how your cheeks flush at the chill (as they had those nights he pulled you into the darkroom, evidence of your apprehension drowned in the red glow of safelights); your hair is longer, unkempt, but still that same colour (clumps he’d find in his clenched fist when you’d argue yourselves into a wrestling match, pinning each other by the throats to dented walls in Die Landebahn); that scar upon your brow; that wavering line of your lip, pursed and hiding behind your reticence as you always did, and your eyes- your eyes—

—you feel someone watching—

—your eyes turn, and fix upon him with the startled softness of a doe, hunter betrayed by the snapping of a branch underfoot. Adler’s heel crunches against broken glass, his hand lingering right in that threadbare threshold upon the doorhandle, and he can’t speak, can’t move, can’t think—

Open the door, Bell, open the door—

—and you stop outside the cab, your breath caught in your throat. You see a shadow in the alley, in the shape of a man.

The darkness of the alley gives enough cover that you don’t see much, but what you do make out of the man prickles at a part of your mind long dormant: the haughtily broad set of the shoulders; the halo of blond tinted red just beneath the flickering exit light above the door where he stands; the shadow of a strong, clenched jaw; and in the brief glinting of passing headlights as cars rush on behind you, you see a face half gorged by a thick, forked scar, a fissure struck down his furrowed expression. A pair of dark aviator glasses hide those eyes that you know are looking at you, reflecting back nothing but your own bewilderment.

There is something you know. Deep inside that half rotted head of yours, where an incomplete recollection of your existence before you awoke bleeding on that clifftop lies, you feel a twinge of recognition. Familiarity. Something. Something stirring deep in your marrow- a fear inherited, a conditioned surrender, a faded polaroid, a kiss? Your migraine, chronic, comes clawing back with a vengeance, as it does most nights, but this time with a savage fervour that wrenches your face into an involuntary grimace. Where the hole in your head had once been all those years ago it tickles and burns, burrowing into your brain and groping greedy fingers along remnants of memory. It claws at you, digging through your amygdala to find something fresh, something old, something palpable, real, something- anything. Searching what little remains visible to you in the thick fog of your own mind to pin a meaning to this feeling, an answer to your question, a name to that face.

You’ve seen him before. You swear. Somewhere. In a dream, reoccurring, behind a red door. You don’t know how, or why you’d think you recognise him- in those dreams, the door never even opens. Your hand ever stuck on the handle, jammed and impenetrable, what sits behind it forbidden to you. Like not even your own mind wants you to know. It confines you to your ignorance, almost blissful.

Adler’s heart kicks violently in his chest. He shot you. He killed you. He’d heard your death rattle on that clifftop in Solovetsky and the sound was almost like singing, your last word, your last breath. A miserere for your short and fractured life. And he’s looking at your ghost, standing there all owl-eyed and as beautiful as the day he found you bleeding out on that airstrip. Before he took you. Before he took you and collared you and made a damned mess of things.

The only thing separating you from the Bell he knows he killed- his Bell- is the star-shaped scar split across your left temple. The only wound he never had to sit and heal as he belligerently patched you up, poking and preening you like his prize dog. Yet in spite of never seeing it before, he recognises the wound all too well. He put it there himself.

And as you stand there for that brief moment- no more than twelve seconds stretched to an eternity- he thinks for a moment that you’ve put it together. You recognise him. You see him. As he is. You’ve figured him out, Bell, as you always do. You’re the only one to have gotten away with it, nearly. Or so he thought. And now he’s watching a corpse having dug itself out of the grave he put it in, standing there, staring at him. Suppose you’ve always been a dead man walking.

You could do it, he thinks. Turn. Fling your heel round and barrel towards him with all the enmity of a cornered animal. He thinks of the strays, barking. Can picture your mouth frothing at the sides as you sink your teeth down into him- gnarled canines, hooked to your chain-link fence- which he probably deserves. Not an unfamiliar feeling by any stretch, but one faraway enough to seem almost sweet now through the hazy lens of nostalgia. If there truly is a sentimental bone in his body after all, then maybe it’s just for that. Still, he holds his breath, awaiting the killing blow he’s surely due. But it never comes.

You release your held breath, finally, tearing your eyes away from the callous faced stranger. It’s a ridiculous notion. Just an uncanny instance of déjà vu. You don’t know that man any more than you know yourself. You settle on a more rational answer- just one of those faces. And with a disgruntled sigh you rub the scar upon your temple to soothe the ache, turn around, and enter the bar alone.

Adler sighs, his heart sinking from up high in his throat back down to his chest. His hand has latched onto the doorhandle for so long it’s gone numb from the cold, bruised knuckles bluer than they were before (bar fights- not here, but another, as there will always be). He wrestles his jaw pensively, knowing he ought to take it off, keep the door closed, turn away, and leave. Slink back, tail between his legs, to that shithole hotel room to drink himself into a stupor. Let you haunt him there, instead. As you always have.

But he doesn’t. He has no idea what idiocy compels him, what soft, dewy-eyed weak link in him snags on that chain, to willingly wander back into the viper den of reminiscence, but he wrenches his fist around the handle, pushes, and lets himself back into the bar, the thick, hot air hitting him like a drug that he breathes in, tart and sour with the cloy of sweat and alcohol but still faintly- just faintly- of you. Like rain carried along the wind.

And Russell Adler is not a sentimental man.

But from across the bar he hides behind his beer glass, watches as you move about, a phantom, weaving through the faceless mass of people celebrating a championship he cares nothing to follow. You take your order at the bar with a smile he’s never seen on you before, boots folded to tip-toes as you lean over the liquor-stickied top, your perfect mouth pink and sweet and laughing and alive. The world seems to move about you in a haze, an indistinct mist of blurred faces and bottled voices and beyond all the light and life and joy that seems to burn bright around you like a halo all he sees is you.

Maybe, then, he’s a fool.

But it isn’t lost on him, how your fingers skirt across your hair in an attempt to hide the scar upon your temple. Nor is it lost on him how you wince at the feeling, the stars in your eyes dimmed for just a split second as you shiver, like a touch imperceptible running fingers down your back. Nor even the way you fight the urge to look, to follow the feeling of his eyes fixed upon you, and surely not the way you lose that fight, surrendered to it, your sweet face turning and finding him in an instant. Without so much as trying, like instinct, like something as pathetic and saccharine as fate. Your heart called to it, a lighthouse in the fog. Port in the storm. Ships passing in the night but called crashing to the same shore.

(The pieces of you are scattered everywhere, Bell. He finds you in every split seam inside himself. Splintered shrapnel dug through his temporal lobe, severing synapses ‘til they go dark. Even stars die quicker than that. Quicker than you. Is that what it felt like for you, too? When the lights went out, was it him you last saw- or the sky, waxen, over the Arctic? A waning night, a distant moon. The inconsequence of death- brief celestial ephemera.)

The stranger across the bar looks at you, offering nary a smile, eyes indiscernible behind shadowed sunglasses. And where you ought to find his apparent coldness disconcerting, instead you wring out of your chest with a white-knuckled caress a feeling like… comfort.

Sometimes, Bell, you go back to Berlin. You don’t quite know why.

[wynnyfryd]

Steddie comfort read rec list part 2

i asked y'all to tell me your most re-read fics and there were too many to include in one list, so (throws confetti) more fic for you! [part 1 here][part 3 in progress]

a map of everyone who loves you by phonemicengineer T | 7k | recced by @flintandfuss

a mess of holy things by ghosttotheparty E | 138k | recced by @kissthegypsy

Anywhere, Anytime by AidaRonan (@aidaronan) M | 6k | recced by @flintandfuss

Are You Dumb Enough Yet, Princess? by BatsBratsandBarbedwire (@batsbratsandbarbedwire) E | 5k | recced by @gothwifehotchner

Crazier Shit Has Happened, Little Bird by BatsBratsandBarbedwire (@batsbratsandbarbedwire) E | 97k | recced by @prettymoongirly and @gothwifehotchner

Do You Mind? (will you mind?) by GreenQueenofClubs E | 44k | recced by @teddywesworl

dogfish by greatunironic (@greatunironic) T | 26k | recced by @cashewnutofdoom

He Knows Only Two Stories by teddywesworl (@teddywesworl) E | 19k | recced by @carbonbased000

Hello, I'm Sorry, I Lost Myself (I Think I Thought You Were Someone Else) by DiscoSuperFly E | 67k | recced by @kultiras-fic-recs

I Am Not The Sun by beetlesandstars (@beetlesandstarss) M | 6k | recced by @kas-eddie-munson

lightning strikes; you're in love by rosterroo T | 90k | recced by @kultiras-fic-recs

Maybe 10% Better by BilbosMom M | 38k | recced by @flintandfuss

Of Space and Time by Appledagger (@appledaggerst) M | 56k | recced by @steddiecameraroll

Play On by little_murmaider G | 1.6k | recced by @flintandfuss

reach out, touch faith by occasional_loverboy (@occasionaloverboy) E | 9k | recced by @postmodernau

Shot Right Through by entanglednow (@entanglednow) E | 5k | recced by @queenie-ofthe-void

Sleight of Hand by smithereen (@flieslikeamoron) E | 143k | recced by @onirislanding and @teddywesworl

Star of the Masquerade by glorious_spoon (@glorious-spoon) M | 65k | recced by @rosyhoneydew

Steddie Amnesia Verse by purpleweekend E | 167k | recced by @kissthegypsy

The Great Scavenger Hunt of 1986 and podfic by wynnyfryd T | 8k | recced by @messessentialist

the most remarkable thing about you standing in the doorway is that it’s you by greatunironic (@greatunironic) E | 35k | recced by @batsbratsandbarbedwire

The Rush of Thunder (That Brings You Under) by callmejude (@callmejude) E | 125k | recced by @onirislanding

the shame is on the other side by scoops_ahoy M | 18k | recced by @kas-eddie-munson

took you for a working boy by pukner (@pukner) M | 44k | recced by @paperbackribs

We are Stardust, We are Golden by idiopathic smile and podfic by Itty_Bitty_Blondie M | 26k | recced by @messessentialist and @onirislanding

We Should Just Kiss (Like Real People Do) by Oonionchiver E | 88k | recced by @kissthegypsy

you must have known for a long time (the shape of things to come) by bramble_berries (@bramble-berries) E | 32k | recced by @queenie-ofthe-void

[buddierecs]

amnesia buddie fics

this list has different rated fics, so please look at the rating make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

i'll feel you forget me like i used to feel you breathe by: turningthepages "just another hollywood amnesia story the fandom probably didn't need but lived in my head rent free for too long." word count: 128k rating: mature important tags: married!buddie, car accidents, hurt/comfort, family feels, insecure!evan buckley, future fic buy back the secrets by: allyasavedtheday "after getting hurt on a call, buck wakes up thinking it's 2018. aka buck can't remember who eddie is but he's pretty sure everyone's lying when they say they're "just friends." word count: 18k rating: teen and up important tags: hurt/comfort, oblivious!eddie diaz, friends to lovers, love confessions you've got the antidote by: hattalove "in which buck is a little high, and shirts are difficult." word count: 4.2k rating: teen and up important tags: anaesthesia, pining, fluff, getting together i think i belong to you (hope you feel the same) by: ran "the one where eddie wakes up from the shooting only to think he was hurt in a certain 7.1 earthquake years prior and learns to appreciate the life he's created for himself since then." word count: 41k rating: teen and up important tags: ptsd, therapy, falling in love, hurt/comfort, angst, love confessions, post-shooting (s4e14) house of forgotten memories by: not1_2write "eddie decides to take a risk. he's a grown man. he can ask Buck out on a date. what could possibly go wrong? three weeks later, clutching a comatose buck's hand and waiting for him to wake up from a traumatic brain injury, eddie gets his answer." word count: 35k rating: teen and up important tags: coma, hurt/comfort, angst, hurt!evan buckley, team as family, getting together, family feels, whump, mutual pining forget-me-nots by: withmeornotatall "eddie wakes up from the ambush, not in the deserts of afghanistan, but the deserts of los angeles and finds out he's missing eight years of his life. somehow, that's worse than falling from the sky and three gunshot wounds." word count: 13k rating: general audience important tags: established relationship, hurt/comfort, internalised homophobia, fluff, angst, team as family what do i say (to make me exist?) by: cuddlyobrien "buck gets hurt at chim & maddie’s wedding, earning some temporary amnesia and thinks he was marrying eddie. the doctor advises they let him believe it. eddie is stressed from day one" word count: 27k rating: explicit important tags: fake dating, mutual pining, post season 6, anal sex, blow jobs, riding come back to me by: jayjay__884 "an accident at the job lands buck in hospital after falling through a 4-story building. his loved ones are by his bedside when buck is placed in an induced coma to help his recovery in hopes he will eventually wake up." word count: 191k rating: explicit important tags: married!buddie, soft!buddie, hurt/comfort, fluff, eventual smut, coma, falling in love, parenthood something that i missed by: foxwatson "the one where buck and eddie get together the night before a shift - and the next day, an accident erases eddie's memory of the last 24 hours." word count: 8.5k rating: teen and up important tags: idiots to lovers, angst, getting together, first kiss your memories feels like home to me by: goforeddie "in which eddie loses about eight year of his life and things are… heavily different than he last remember." word count: 29k rating: mature important tags: married!buddie, angst, girl dads!buddie, fluff, eventual smut remember to remember me by: daffi_990_ao3 "buck and eddie finally get together only for lightning to strike a few days later, leaving buck with no memories of them ever becoming a couple." word count: 31k rating: explicit important tags: getting together, fluff, emotional hurt/comfort, angst, boys in love, anal sex, blow jobs, riding, dirty talk

[thelikesofus]

Buddie Fic Recs

This is my 5th Buddie Rec List! I started compiling this list last April and omg looking back through them now I desperately need to reread them all. Highly recommend all of these fics, also please show the authors some love in their comments xx Happy Easter lovelies <3 REMINDER TO CHECK THE TAGS AND TRIGGER WARNINGS

where our eyes are never closing by @rewritetheending | T | 6k

After the lightning strike, Buck asks Eddie to take candid photos of him to help prove to Buck that he still exists. Absolute PEAK Softness. Buck through Eddie's eyes! I was a mushy puddle by the end. 10/10 would recommend. 

i got all my sisters with me by @useramor | T | 6k

Established relationship Buddie. Eddie’s sister has a baby and they travel down to Texas to meet the baby. DIAZ SIBLINGS UNITE! Seriously though the sibling dynamic in this is off the charts and Buck and Eddie are sickeningly in love, it is quite beautiful.

meet me where the tide comes in by @iinryer | G | 4k

A 3+1 fic about Eddie getting kissed on the head. FOREHEAD KISSES PTSD MORE HEAD KISSES AND BOYS IN LOVE!! Need I say anything more??

The one where Buck gets turned into a dog by @911onabc | G | 9k

Law Suit era BUT WAIT WAIT….DOG BUCK!! I am a sucker for fic where one of them gets turned into an animal. They are much more free with their affection when they think it's just a dog, or just a cat, and the bond between Eddie and "Boy" is so so wonderful. And I do love a happy ending xx

can't do this anymore (do it anyway) by @chronicowboy | T | 2k

Short and sweet but GOD this packs a punch. Eddie starts dating after the lightning strike and Buck is feeling Big Bad about it. He is so sad it truly breaks my heart but all works itself out in the end and Eddie proves Buck’s fears wrong.

We Found Each Other (Over There)  by @thekristen999 | T | 46k

Buddie WWII AU. A combat medic and a G.I. meet during one of the world’s greatest battles. This fic is a legitimate masterpiece. I cannot describe to you the quality of this fic because it is beyond words but I will tell you I stayed up until 3:30 am to finish it in one sitting and was left broken but made so so whole again. 

the mortifying ordeal of being known by @the-amber-raven | G | 60k

AU where Bobby is Buck’s adoptive Dad and Eddie is dating Buck but Eddie and Bobby think they are talking about two different people. Buck is training at the fire academy but hiding it from Bobby. This fic is the most beautiful tangle of miscommunication, love and family. 

like all good things are by @try-set-me-on-fire | T | 7k

Perfect, amazing, soul-destroying, magical, healing Fic. This literally covers all the bases. Chim and Bobby both get injured. OH! and Buck and Eddie were secretly dating all along. READ THIS FIC PEEPS!

find a way to you (if it kills me) by @eddiediazes  | M | 19k

The one where Eddie decides to start dating again, Buck figures out his own feelings just a minute too late, and then he spends a week going through the five stages of grief. BUCK PINING LV.10000000!

and i’d choose you (in a hundred lifetimes) by @monsterrae1 | E | 16k

Amnesia Exes fic by the wonderful Rae. Buck and Eddie fall in love via a penpal program and then Buck vanishes. This fic is set four years later. I literally could not put it down. I was reading it in class and then sat in my car for who knows how long just to finish it because I could not continue my day without knowing how it ended.

he never thinks of me (except when i'm on TV) by @loserdiaz | M | 18k 

APRIL'S FAMOUS!BUCK AND ARMY!EDDIE FIC!! In which Eddie finds out years later that his unrequited feelings for his high school best friend were not actually unrequited, Buck is stupidly famous now and they pine. OH THEY PINNNEEEEE! It’s delicious. 

every time we stop talking (the universe starts screaming) by @chronicowboy | M | 21k 

Alternative S7, Buddie Divorce Era Pt.2. Buck does something reckless and Eddie gets angry about it but these boys cannot communicate effectively to save their lives! This fic is peak angst to a happy ending and I felt like I had a hole in my chest OMG.

left your mark on this heart by @chronicowboy | G | 5k

Buck gets medically diagnosed with butterflies and the doctor makes him write in a notebook every time it happens. Surprise, surprise, the cause and effect is Eddie-related. The notebook entries kill me in the best way, the happiest happy ending

ALSO, YES THIS IS THE THIRD FIC BY THE SAME AUTHOR ON THIS LIST WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT?? READ IT IS WHAT! COS THEY'RE SO DAMN GOOD. 

endless numbered days by @cal-daisies-and-briars | G | 13k 

Buck and Eddie's wedding but from Bobby's POV as Bobby reflects on the family he lost and the one he gained. Absolutely beautiful, I cried.

don’t wanna let you love somebody else but me by @shitouttabuck | T | 14k

Chris wants dating advice so obviously Buck and Eddie decide to Fake Date for research purposes. This fic is PEAK adorable, sappy, and awkward Buddie. They’re idiots but we love them and the certainly love each other. READ THIS FIC! 

[hl-obsessed]

my first fic rec ever! faves from the faves: ✨ and fics i would die for: 💎✨

Have I forgotten how to love; remind me once again by Harrystylesisgod24

(M, 108k) After a serious accident, Harry suffers from a case of retrograde amnesia where he hasn't only forgotten the fact that he is a part of the world-famous band, One Direction, but his fiancé, Louis Tomlinson, as well. Despite being immensely grateful for Harry being alive, Niall, Liam, Zayn, and especially Louis, struggle with accepting that Harry might never remember the many things they experienced together; hell, even their friendship is forgotten. And Louis can't quite push away the crippling fear of Harry not remembering that he loves Louis with all he got. Not that any of that is going to stop Louis from reminding him over and over again.

There You Are by lovelarry10

(E, 82k) Harry’s entire life has fallen apart - in one night, his carefully planned future is suddenly uncertain.

Then he meets Louis.

where the tide takes you, i will follow by @pinkcords

(E, 54k) There’s no way around his departure, their inevitable fate. Harry will leave and he will return to London and when he sits in his new flat, wherever it might be, he will think of this summer and the warmth the sun brought him and the way it felt to be loved. He will compare all his future relationships to Louis and when they fall short, he will be disappointed. Harry knows this.

Or, Louis lives in Gloucester and Harry tries to find a way to stay.

waiting for the tides to meet by @nauticalleeds

(E, 60k) Louis lets out a deep breath, thinking about Harry’s soulmate. Thinking about how Harry’s soulmate is probably as beautiful as Harry, some person that Louis cannot compare to, and how the universe has chosen them to be Harry’s. Fuck the universe. “Fuck you,” he calls out to the universe. He’s aware of how crazy he sounds.

Maybe he is crazy, with how he’s falling for Harry. And fuck that, too. 

Soulmate AU. Everyone is born with heterochromia — one eye is their own eye colour, while the other is the colour of their soulmate's. It's only when they meet their soulmate for the first time that their own eyes match properly.

The Devil and the Deep Blue Sea by @kingsofeverything

(E, 109k) Louis’ life is steady and calm, moored by his marriage, and tied to his hometown, but after a chance encounter with another man, it’ll never be the same.

somewhere in between lightning by @nauticalleeds, @shiningdistraction, jassy117​

(E, 99k) A summer gone wrong (or very right) when, under Liam’s persuasion, Louis finds himself drunkenly applying for Love Island, and getting accepted. Oh, well. A summer spent on an island paradise couldn’t be all that bad, right?

Escapade by @haydolce

(M, 146k) In the grand scheme of things, finding a date for a wedding should be no problem for Louis Tomlinson. He's rich. He's handsome. He's reasonably well behaved. But when the wedding is for his lifelong best friend (and former boyfriend), and is happening in under a month, finding a date for the ceremony and accompanying festivities becomes more of an adventure than he ever could have planned for.

💎✨ Take My Breath Away by @realitybetterthanfiction

(E, 154k) Top Gun AU

love is a word, you gave it a name by @larrydoinglaundry

(E, 158k) After two decades in brutal show business, Louis Tomlinson is trying to restore his tranquility of mind in the peace of Northern Europe where the sun barely sets, Maria's bar is always open, and young Harry has an irresistible spark in his eyes.

✨ Shadow Dances by @itsmotivatingcara

(M, 101k) Louis Tomlinson has a begrudging gift, he’s able to communicate with the spirits of the dead. FBI Medium AU

Tired Tired Sea by @mediawhorefics

(M, 113k) As a B&B owner on the most remote of all the British Isles, Louis Tomlinson is used to spending the coldest half of the year in complete isolation, with his dog and the sea as sole companions. Until, one day, a mysterious stranger on a quest to rebuild himself rents a room for the winter.

For the Right Reasons by @juliusschmidt

(E, 106k) Bachelor AU

Late Night Talking by @kingsofeverything

(E, 53k) Louis Tomlinson has a new album coming out and a second world tour on the horizon. Promo season gets underway with a stop at Late Night Talking, the late night show hosted by Harry Styles, and Harry Styles just happens to be the man who blew a chance to date Louis a decade ago.

technicolor by @creamcoffeelou

(E, 81k) When the small town of Twin Lakes begins experiencing a string of serial murders, a team of detectives is called in to help. Louis is the head of the team and meets a hard-headed psychic who everyone else seems to believe is the one who will solve the case.

Louis isn't so sure.

The slow-burn, hate-to-love, crime au where Harry is a psychic, Louis is a detective, and the world is against them.

This Wicked Game by @cherrystreet

(E, 70k) An AU in which The Bachelor is gay, Louis is a contestant, Harry is the bachelor, everyone drinks a lot of champagne, the entire world gets to watch them fall in love, and no one plays by the rules

Like Water Over Fire (Like Water On Fire) by @mcssymon

(M, 119k) Prince Harry has 46 men and 13 weeks to find the husband of his dreams, Louis has a limited amount to time to live out a royal fantasy. They might just be exactly what the other needs.

Say Something by @kingsofeverything

(E, 105k) At fifty years old and recently divorced, Omega Harry Styles isn't interested in dating. When his doctor suggests a heat and rut matching service, he signs up out of necessity. It’s the only use he has for an Alpha in his life.

Twenty-eight-year-old Alpha Louis Tomlinson aims to change that.

Let Our Hearts Collide by @crinkle-eyed-boo

(M, 77k) When Harry, a lonely transit worker, saves the life of the handsome commuter he's been secretly pining for, an innocent mistake results in Liam Payne's family believing that Harry is engaged to their son. In the Paynes, Harry finds the big family he's always longed for...and a love he never saw coming.

A While You Were Sleeping AU

💎✨ Love After the End of the World by @mercurial-madhouse

(E, 162k) “Wait. Just so I’m clear in me fucking noggin,” Niall says. “An international worldwide takeover is well under way and the only thing standing between having hot showers and a second end of the world is us five fuckers?” 

***

Society shattered when all electricity suddenly cut off across the globe, plunging the world into darkness. Now, Prometheus Industries is the sole remaining supply of power, a saving grace to those who survived Lights Out. As fugitives in no-man’s land struggling to break into Prometheus HQ, death lurks around every corner for Louis and Zayn. Things get complicated when a routine recon falls apart and Louis collides with Harry and his mates Niall and Liam, survivors with their own agenda.

When staying alive is already a constant battle, the deadliest weakness is to be in love. For Harry and Louis, finding each other sits on top of the endless list of What Else Could Go Wrong.

(story sadly has been delated form ao3. link to download here)

✨ Stranger Stars by shaylea

(E, 212k) Five years ago, Africa offered a grieving Louis Tomlinson an escape from an England he couldn't tolerate. Now it's become home as he leads overland tours across the continent with his best friend and driver Zayn Malik. What's meant to be just another ordinary six-week trip from Cape Town to Nairobi turns into anything but, when future lawyer/current photographer and songwriter Harry Styles and his friends join Louis' latest set of passengers.

Gemma's Dad (Could Use A Guy Like Me) by @lululawrence

(NR, 83k) The summer before Louis and Gemma's senior year of college was supposed to be their last big hurrah before they graduate college and become Real Adults in the workforce. They had it all planned and it was going to be filled with mornings skateboarding, afternoons at the pool, and evenings hanging out with as many of the neighborhood kids they grew up with as they can.

Of course, Louis wasn't planning on getting home and learning that Gemma's dad had gotten the house in the divorce and was dealing with things by focusing on work, the house, and his newly planted garden. It becomes obvious early on that Harry is a bit lost and Gemma is worried about him. To help both of them, Louis is more than happy to help Harry find himself again.

As the summer goes on, the adventures and day to day happenings allow Harry and Louis to spend a lot more time together than either of them ever anticipated and Louis finds it more difficult to keep his growing feelings in check than he ever thought it would be. After all, there wasn't a chance that Harry would ever be interested in Louis... right?

red hands by @dystopianharry

(TNU, 133k) "I’ve never told anyone," Harry murmurs, voice so soft no one else would be able to hear, if it wasn’t just the two of them.

“But you’ve told someone,” Louis says firmly. “And that’s not gonna fucking happen around here. You don’t speak a word of it, or someone’s going to kill you, and we can’t let that happen.”

*

a dystopian au in which harry, an ex-soldier who’s escaped from his government run camp, accidentally stumbles across the biggest rebel movement in the country, and louis, one of the rebellion’s mysterious leaders who appears to hate him, seems to simultaneously have an obsession with keeping him alive. or: harry is wanted for treason, niall hasn’t changed in four years, liam is always smiling, and louis is angry. like, really angry.

another dream but always you by @nobodymoves

(M, 66k) Harry is a Dreamwalker; he has the ability to visit people in their dreams and help put them on the right path. He's assigned to Louis, who's struggling after the break-up of his band. It's an unusual assignment from the beginning; Harry has a crush on Louis, and Louis's subconscious immediately decides Harry is the love of his life. When Dreamers cast Harry as their love interest, he can usually redirect them, but Louis is insistent on being Harry's boyfriend, and despite knowing they have no future, Harry wants to keep up the charade.

Shake Me Down by @agreatperhaps12

(NR, 208k) Harry's new to college, fresh out of Catholic school and conversion therapy camp, and Louis runs the campus LGBTQIA organization.

Nameless Night by green_feelings

(E, 155k) For their 18th birthday, every person receives a letter that reads a simple date. That is the date you'll meet your soulmate.

Harry and Louis have different beliefs, live in different worlds and have different dreams, hopes and fears. Yet, they're not so different from each other when it comes to love. When their paths cross, there is no doubt they belong together. Except for that one, essential difference: they didn't receive the same date.

Or, a fic about differences that make no difference at all: Harry and Louis are soulmates. In every way possible. Featuring Niall as a role model, and Liam and Zayn as a different kind of role models.

Light, Spark and Fire (series) by green_feelings

(M, 239k) Or, Harry’s working on taking Louis’ walls down, until he builds his own up.

Jump Before We Fall by green_feelings

(E, 114k) Louis and Zayn's lives revolve around running a hotel by the sea, Harry is a student who wants a life far from home for just a little while, Niall doesn't know where life leads him and Liam thinks he has already found all purposes in his life.

✨💎 my heart is breathing for this moment in time by usedtothebeach

(E, 160k) When Louis first saw Harry at the 2010 X Factor Auditions, he thought he was watching a peculiarly special stranger. But Harry has known Louis ever since he was five years old.

Because Louis has a rare genetic disorder that causes him to Time Travel to important moments in his past and in his future - and to Harry, always to Harry. When they're put into a band together, it seems like everything Harry has been waiting and wishing for has finally come true. Except for the small fact that Louis doesn't know that Harry is in love with him- that Harry's always been in love with him. Fate, it would seem, is just getting started.

A story about growing up and growing together, and the impossible love that makes it all worthwhile.

✨ you were in my dream by @harruandlou

(E, 59k) Louis woke up after having a sexy dream about his best friend’s boyfriend’s best friend resolved to never think about it again. He hardly knew Harry, so what difference would it make? But when they are thrown together only a few days later, Louis had to admit, his subconscious might have been onto something.

Desperation Was My Sanctuary by @insightfulinsomniac

(E, 102k) As a PhD student and transplant to New York City, Louis is struggling for both money and companionship. His roommate, Zayn, introduces him to a friend who is involved in New York City's sugar bowl. Reluctantly, he signs up for a sugaring app knowing he’s probably the least conventional sugar baby on the market. If he can find a sugar daddy who will pay his bills without asking him to sacrifice his own preferences and boundaries, he might just be willing to earn a bit of extra cash by faking a relationship with a millionaire.

At the age of 35, Harry’s spent his entire adult life devoted to his career as a fashion designer. With his label, Eroda, steady and flourishing, he finally has time to settle down. When he reflects on his adult life, he realizes that he’s never been in a relationship and therefore feels behind. Shy and insecure in his inexperience, he turns to a sugaring app to manufacture a “test relationship” on his terms.

Turns out, they’re both looking for something unconventional.

A smutty, non-traditional strangers-to-lovers story about finding yourself, friendship, safety, sexual discovery, and an unexpected collision with tender, profound love.

Of Mates and Men by bananaheathen

(E, 630k) In which, Louis and Harry meet as best men for their best friends' wedding... well... sort of.

Or, the one where Harry's just moved back from New York and Louis doesn't believe in romance.

Or, I guess... the one where Zayn and Liam are getting married.

✨ Next to your Heartbeat (where I should be) by jaded25

(M, 130k) "We were meant to be but a twist of fate made it so we had to walk away"

All it takes for them to fall in love is one night. All they have to do is wait one year to see each other again.

Yet, when Louis returns after his year abroad, the boy who's got his arms wrapped around Harry isn't him. It isn't a stranger either, which should make walking away all that easier. After all, friend's don't lust after their mate's boyfriends.

Technically, doing the right thing should be easy - but when has Louis ever been known to taking the easy way out?

✨ For As Long As I Can Remember (It's Been December) by green_feelings

(E, 128k) After recovering from a severe accident that causes Harry to lose his memory of three years, he moves to London to start his life over as a star chef. Little does he know that when he falls in love with Louis at first sight, it’s not the first time they meet.

Featuring an unintentional game of hot and cold, Harry chasing memories that won’t come back, Louis burying himself in work to try and forget what he can’t forget, Liam being torn between two of his best friends, Zayn as a moral compass and Niall saving the day with good music and brutal honesty.

✨🌸🌸🌸✨

part 2 (30-50k)

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | February 26th-March 3rd 2024

8 days!!!!! Only 8 days left!!!! Until then enjoy these fics!!

Complete

doin' something unholy by BekkaChaos/ @bekkachaos (PWP, TikTok, Getting Together | 7K | Explicit): Eddie makes a tiktok account so he can monitor Chris' activity on the app, and he stumbles across Buck’s profile. It’s a lot of silly trends, a couple with Chris (previously Eddie approved), but when he scrolls to the newest video it’s one of those transition thirst traps and oh yeah, Eddie’s been sucked in, hard.

it’s the tapping on the kitchen’s floor by gayedmundodiaz (rose_megan)/ @gayedmundodiaz (Friends to Fiances | 1K | General): Eddie takes a shortcut to 'engaged' thanks to some stress and little bit of pining.

This Is No Hallmark Movie by gayedmundodiaz (rose_megan)/ @gayedmundodiaz (Hurt Buck, Getting Together | 4K | Teen): Buck's impromptu trip to the ICU has Eddie crash-landing into the realization that he's deeply, madly in love with his best friend.

You Are The One by gayedmundodiaz (rose_megan)/ @gayedmundodiaz (Getting Together | 3K | Teen): Eddie finds a drawing of Christopher's from school that sends his feelings careening off a cliff

cause you make life easy by gayedmundodiaz (rose_megan)/ @gayedmundodiaz (PWP, First Time | 2K | Explicit): Eddie and Buck are in love, and it’s so, so easy.

got love-struck, went straight to my head by heartbeatdiaz/ @loserdiaz (Future Fic, Established Buddie, Amnesia | 17K | Teen): The morning of their wedding day, Buck wakes up with amnesia.

too many heartbeats for one ribcage by lamardeuse/ @lamardeuse (Sexuality Crisis, Getting Together | 8K | Mature): Eddie's not queer.

Baby, I'm Never Gonna Leave You by I_still_dont_understand_13 (BTHBingo: Distress Call, Post-S6 | 12K | Mature): "Um... You remember that bracelet I bought Taylor?" Buck asked. Unfortunately, Eddie did. That Christmas was memorable... for all the wrong reasons. "Yeah. Why?" "It's been set off," he said, tilting his head like a confused puppy.

🔥 Ace of Hearts by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (Post-S6, Getting Together | 9K | Teen): "I've been wondering…" Maddie pauses, watches Buck make a face like he's bracing to be smacked. "What happened with Eddie? You two were dancing around it for so long, and then… what, it just didn't work out? Was the date really that bad?" She's expecting another wince, or even for him to duck out of the conversation entirely, but instead Buck is staring at her like she's grown a second head. "Maddie. I've never been on a date with Eddie." Or: the poker game was a date. It takes Buck a while to catch on, though.

🔥 I'm comin' back, don't let me go by wikiangela/ @wikiangela (Post-S6, Angst | 7K | General): Buck's post-lightning breakdown takes him on a drive through the country, fighting not to give into his dark thoughts - a phone call from Eddie might be all he needs to lead him back home.

We Were Never Meant To Be Someone's Secret by DeadlyChildArtemis / @aroeddiediaz (Madney Wedding, Secret Relationship | 3K | Explicit): Buck and Eddie have been trying to keep their new relationship secret until after Maddie and Chimney's wedding, but strange events keep conspiring to expose them before they're ready. The final straw is when they discover their hotel room at the venue only has one bed...

he speaks the languages of love by glorious_spoon (PWP, Established Buddie, Phone Sex | 4K | Explicit): "Buck. It's been almost two weeks since I've been able to get my hands on you. I'm going out of my mind. Yeah, I want you to tell me how you thought about bending me over the weight bench when I critiqued your gym selfies, or whatever." Or: while Eddie is out of town, he and Buck revisit an old fantasy of Buck's.

you were never meant to carry it on your own by artificalsirens/ @fortheloveofbuddie (Established Buddie, Hurt Buck, Smut | 5K | Explicit): During sex, Buck has a bad chronic pain flare up but wants to continue. Eddie stops him and takes care of him.

🔥 when you know, you know by asteriasera/ @asteriasera (Post-S6, Friends To Fiances | 11K | General): “How did you know you and Karen were ready to get married?” Hen blinks, clearly taken aback by the question. “I didn’t know you and Natalia were so serious.” “We’re not,” he blurts out, face red. “I’m not– I don’t even have a ring, and we haven’t really talked about it, but I was just curious. I mean, you should know since you two got married like, twice, right?” “That’s true.” Hen hums, then huffs out a laugh just the right amount of soft for this sweet pre-dawn moment. “As cheesy as it sounds, I guess that when you know, you know.” OR: After eight months of dating, Natalia begins dropping hints for their future together and Buck begins to question if this is what he really wants. One day later, a proposal is made in a kitchen over tiramisu

i'm thinking we should cross the line by chromatophorica/ @chromatophorica (Canon Divergent, Post-S2, Not Firefighter Buck | 12K | Teen): Following the ladder truck bombing, Buck can't return to firefighting, having to find new passions while maintaining his bonds with the 118. Enter Eddie Diaz, his replacement, and May's scheming takes hold. But that's fine; two can play that game.

i found love where it wasn't supposed to be by chromatophorica/ @chromatophorica (Season 2, Buck&Bobby | 12K | Teen): It’s not until the earthquake that Eddie figures it out. He’d be the same if Chris was there; probably a little more overbearing, but Chris is only seven, so he figures that’d be why. But it makes sense, how focused on Buck that Nash is right then, the similar frantic energy that Buck’s got focusing on the Captain. He’s a little surprised that the LAFD allow a father and son pair to work together OR: Eddie makes some assumptions when he joins the 118, he'd like the record to show he's not entirely wrong.

we can find shelter and peace by chromatophorica / @chromatophorica (Post-S2, 3K | Teen): Following Eddie's graduation from probie to firefighter, the gang talk about their graduations... Until they get to Buck.

like the peel clings to the pomegranate by fallingthorns/ @fallingthorns (Post-S6E10: In A Flash, Getting Together | 3K | Teen): Or, Buck recovers and doesn't quite realize what he means to others.

hey now, hey now by fallingthorns/ @fallingthorns (Canon Divergent, Post-S5E10: Wrapped In Red | 10K | Teen): Or, after returning to the 118, Eddie becomes a full-time paramedic and Ravi becomes Buck's partner. Eddie absolutely doesn't feel anything about that, not at all.

happy at home by fallingthorns/ @fallingthorns (Post-S5, Getting Together | 6K | Teen): Or, the one where Eddie sees Buck with a small kitten, realizes he’s in love, and spontaneously combusts, but not necessarily in that order.

we made it (knew that we would be alright) by honestlydarkprincess/ @honestlydarkprincess (S7 Spec, Buck&Maddie | <1K | General): Maddie asks Buck to walk her down the aisle.

this lovesick thing by fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Post-S6, Getting Together | 4K | Teen): or, buck is buck: best friend, klutz, star of eddie’s every lovesick daydream. which is to say, things are the same, except maybe what eddie’s willing to ask for

Fractals from the Lightning Bolt by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (One Shots Collection | 52/54 | 95K | Not Rated): A collection of oneshots, some originally posted on tumblr. Each chapter is individually rated.

50. Happy Holidays to the Clown Car (Christmas | Teen) 51. Maybe We're All Sluts Here (PWP | Explicit)

My Worried Mind That You Quiet by giselleslash (Christopher POV, Getting Together | 3K | General): or, Buck and Eddie through Christopher's eyes.

send a flare up in the dark (and i'll come find you) by honestlydarkprincess/ @honestlydarkprincess (Post-S6, Getting Together | 7K | Teen): Buck and Natalia are hanging out at a bar, with Natalia watching in amusement as Buck pines. She gets distracted when Lucy shows up so Buck starts drunk texting Eddie and eventually Eddie comes to get Buck, but not before Buck accidentally confesses his feelings not realizing that Eddie is there. Did Buck just fuck up or do they both get everything they've ever wanted?

you are so gorgeous it makes me so mad by bellabrady (Post-S6, Getting Together | 5K | Not Rated): Or: Eddie is annoyed with Buck for being so very kissable but his drunk self isn't the best at phrasing things.

what to do when evan buckley breaks into your house at 3:17 in the morning by oklahoma/ @sunshinediaz (Getting Together | 3K | Teen): After a night out drinking with Maddie, Buck (kind of) breaks in to Eddie’s house.

Orange Peels & Coffee by bibuckleyforever/ @bibuckleyforever (Post-S6, Getting Together | 2K | General): Eddie finds out about the Orange Peel Theory and it leads to some important realizations.

some of it's just transcendental by fallingthorns/ @fallingthorns (Accidental Kissing, Getting Together | 2K | Teen): Buck smiles as Eddie leans in and presses a soft kiss to his lips, and Buck feels himself grinning further against his mouth and kissing back before Eddie pulls away, too soon and with that same soft smile on his lips. He eases the bags fully out of Buck’s arms and turns to head into the kitchen, and Buck watches him go with such a fond smile that he feels like he’s going to explode. And then he freezes and stares at Eddie’s retreating form, his heart constricting in his chest as his brain struggles to catch up with the events of the last twenty seconds. Because kissing? Is not something they have ever done before.

that green light, i want it by asteriasera / @asteriasera (Post-S6, One Night Stand, Getting Together | 11K | Mature): Buck and Eddie hook up after Maddie and Chim’s wedding, then spend an inordinate amount of time not talking about what it means until the universe decides to intervene.

WIP

i got a bad desire, i'm on fire by diazbegins/ @evanbegins (PWP, Pet Play | 1/2 | 8K | Explicit): Or: Eddie finds that he wants Buck to treat him like a kitty. Buck can make that work.

if i need to rearrange my particles — i will for you. by dylaesthetics (Post-S6, Identity Porn | 6/11 | 22K | Teen): OR Buck joins a support app for first responders and matches with a firefighter who has PTSD and a kid who likes giraffes, apparently.

🔥 Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briar / @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon S1-S6, S7 Spec | 120/? | 362K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.

🔥 Any Other Way by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, S2 | 4/18 | 25K | Mature): In a switcheroo alternate universe, Buck spends young adulthood in the military, while Eddie, who has no idea Christopher exists, spends his twenties messing around, finally enjoying freedom away from his family’s expectations. When they both end up in Los Angeles, at the 118, some things are different, and others will be the same in any universe.

🔥 because we'll all arrive in heaven alive by callmenewbie/ @puppyboybuckley (Post-S6, Disaster Fic | 7/9 | 51K | Explicit): During a search and rescue, Eddie disappears without a trace, leaving Buck to grapple with the sudden possibility of a life without him.

[exhuastedpigeon]

Hiatus Buddie Fic Rec - Month 2 June 16 - July 15

Here's the second rec list! Here's my favourite fics that I've read that were posted between June 16 and July 15

0-5k

if your heart wears thin by devirnis / @devirnisGen | 986 words He knows the shift was disheartening, but the little rain cloud of gloom that’s been hanging over Buck’s head since he fell in the water has Eddie mildly concerned.

You with the dark curls, you with the watercolour eyes by thewolvesof1998 / @thewolvesof1998

Mature | 1.6k The morning after Buck and Eddie finally get together.

Stuck On You by rosebuddiekin / @giddyupbuck

Teen | 2.5k Eddie jokingly gives Buck stickers that have positive saying on them, but it quickly gets out of hand.

Not A Trick of the Mind (Only Love) by Bookbee, JJK / @trenchcoatsandtimetravel & @painting--words

Teen | 4.2k Buck wakes up in hospital with amnesia and thinks Eddie is married to someone else.

I could spend the whole day just gettin' by by rowan_wood / @transboybuckley Gen | 4.4k “I’m sick,” Buck said, eyes closed, when he could sense Eddie reached the loft. (Sick fic)

Find a remedy by BladeoftheNebula Teen | 4.7 Buck and Eddie tell Christopher they're dating. It doesn't go well.

5k-10k

Of Sound Mind (And Memory) by henry988

Not rated | 6k In the hours after Buck is struck by lightning, Maddie is faced with retrieving the last will and testament of her brother, just in case. Together, with Eddie, they learn more about their brother and friend.

give me a sign, I want you next to me by 42hrb Teen | 7k The 118 knows Buck has a really cute kid and a partner he loves, they just think that partner is his husbands ex-wife.

we don't need to play games like these (you won me long ago) by withmeornotatall / @chronicowboy Explicit | 10.4k five times buck was turned on by Eddie's complete lack of rizz and the one time he realised what his new kink was for

10k-20k

you been looking for love (let me show you how it's done) by wikiangela / @wikiangela Explicit | 12.2k Eddie is a tease, Buck is horny and jealous of Eddie dating, and a regular evening takes an unexpected turn.

Sixth time's the charm by CorgiQueen14 Teen | 14.2k The mid-lawsuit time loop fic.

20k - 30k

in the night we trust by glorious_spoon / @glorious-spoon

Explicit | 29.2k Eddie and Buck start sleeping together when they're all stuck at Buck's place during lockdown. It still takes them almost three years to notice that they're in love.

30k +

i know you're gone now, but i'll still wait for you by roephobic Teen | 32.1k the one where Buck leaves and Eddie breaks down.

you and i'll be safe and sound by spaceprincessem / @spaceprincessem

Teen | 50.8k buddie hunger games au

Evan Buckley & The Coma-Verse of Madness by Daisies_and_Briars / @cal-daisies-and-briars Teen | 57.9k After being struck by lightning on a call, Buck experiences a plethora of alternate realities showing him different directions his life could have taken. Fighting hard to get home, Buck learns what, or who, is important to him in every lifetime.

i love you (and i like you) by withmeornotatall / @chronicowboy Explicit | 64.4k he parks and rec au in which buck is leslie and eddie is ben feat. gay penguins

a body, a knife, hold steady by bvckandeddie (zukkababey) / @bvckandeddie Mature | 67.4k Buck and Eddie meet, fall in love, build a life together, and discover they're rival assassins—exactly in that order.

[hlficlibrary]

HL Fic Library 🥀 Exes Fic Rec

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🥀 Mine Would Be You by @crinkle-eyed-boo {E, 114k}

Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.

Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.

Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.

Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?

🥀 And What If I Were You by jacaranda_bloom / @jacaranda-bloom {E, 109k}

For Louis, will losing his sight give him the clarity to realise what is right in front of him?

For Harry, will losing the love of his life give him the strength to finally open his heart?

And can they find their way back, before they lose each other forever?

A story of love. A story of loss. A story of fighting for each other, no matter the odds.

🥀 somewhere in between lightning  by jassy117, @nauticalleeds, shiningdistractionwrites / @shiningdistraction {E, 99k}

As Louis took another bite, he thought back to how he had once believed that the hardest thing about being on Love Island would be Liam handling his social media.  He had been wrong. It was Harry Styles, peeking over at Louis as he forked a pancake into his mouth, and gauging his reaction. It was having to quench the swelling of his heart, which felt simultaneously like hope and the breaking of a thousand pieces.

A summer gone wrong (or very right) when, under Liam’s persuasion, Louis finds himself drunkenly applying for Love Island, and getting accepted. Oh, well. A summer spent on an island paradise couldn’t be all that bad, right?

Imagine his surprise when Louis arrives in sunny Majorca to find that his first love and ex-boyfriend, Harry, is another contestant, about to capture the hearts of everyone in the villa. Most normal people don’t have to face their ex on an otherwise straight TV show. Most normal people don’t fall for their ex again in front of the whole nation, either. Too bad this whole situation isn’t normal.

🥀 Emperor’s New Clothes by sunsetmog / @magicalrocketships {E, 92k}

The fact that Louis’s most precious belonging was a cat with a face like thunder and an uncanny ability to cover every single inch of Louis’s clothing with cat hair was something that Louis chose not to think about too much.

or: Harry’s a pop star and Louis isn’t, and there’s a non-disclosure agreement where there used to be a relationship.

🥀 Consequences by @allwaswell16 {E, 78k}

Two years ago Harry let his powerful family come between him and the love of his life, something he deeply regrets. Louis has tried to move on from their devastating break up. Sometimes, he even thinks he has. It only takes one moment to freeze them back in time.

An amnesia au

🥀 your memory over me by @shimmeringevil {E, 64k}

Three years have passed since Louis last saw him, but all it took was a few minutes in Harry’s presence for him to be relegated to the desperate twenty-one year old that was practically begging his boyfriend for an ounce of reassurance that he still cared about him.

Harry shouldn’t be here. He’s brought too many unresolved feelings with him, that Louis thought he’d never have to face.

It’s Harry’s apparent apathy that’s the most difficult to come to terms with. Anger, he could handle. Regret, he would welcome. But Harry’s amiability, and carefree demeanor can only be born from indifference.

He’s moved on. He doesn’t care. And that is something Louis doesn’t think he’ll ever be strong enough to face.

OR - The worst heartbreak of Louis’ life walks right back into it when his parents invite their family friends on an all-expenses-paid trip for their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Facing a past that he tried to bury long ago, Louis learns that some people have a way of sticking with you even when they’re gone.

🥀 Feels Like Coming Home by @phdmama {E, 60k}

The last thing Harry Styles expects when he's hanging out at the Someday Cafe in Somerville one rainy October day is for his ex, Louis Tomlinson to walk through the door, but that's exactly what happens. After a spectacularly ugly break-up three years prior, Harry hasn't heard one word from Louis, and he's moved on. Gotten over him. But having Louis back in his life, not to mention working at the restaurant where he's a chef, isn't easy, and the feelings that Harry thought he'd left turn out to be not so easily forgotten.

This is a story about love and the power of forgiveness, and how the hard choices we make define us, and change our lives.

🥀 The Second Hand Unwinds by @kingsofeverything {E, 51k}

Louis Tomlinson is one of the first members of NASA's top secret Chrono Exploration Program. When things go wrong and he's sent further back in time than planned, he has no other option than to show up on his ex-boyfriend's doorstep.

🥀 The End Should Be A Good One by bananasandboots / @anylessreal {M, 43k}

It doesn't feel like falling in love, the way it had felt the first time around, easy, simple, almost like floating, wrapped up in a whirlwind of touches and kisses, late nights spent laughing breathlessly into each other's skin. This feels broken, complicated, like every move carries the weight of their past. Like the floorboards beneath them could collapse at any moment. This doesn't feel good.

Or, the one where Harry loses the love of his life on New Years Eve and finds him again, six months later, ready to open some poorly-stitched wounds.

🥀 Sometimes You Just Know by @2tiedships2 {M, 33k}

“Dear diary. Today is going to be a good day, and here’s why...”

“What are you doing?” Louis mumbled as he bit into a piece of toast.

“It’s been almost two years and today Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson reunite. Louis is very excited about…”

Louis’ chair screeched along the kitchen floor as he flew up out of his seat, quickly grabbing the paper from Niall’s grasp. As he scanned the page he found it amounted to lines of nothing.

“What is this?” Louis asked again. “We’ve discussed how Harry Styles will never be spoken of in this flat. I don’t care how long it’s been.”

Niall snatched the paper from Louis and proceeded to draw a line across the page before writing.

“Today is the day that he-who-shall-not-be-named is coming to dinner.”

Or the one where Harry and Louis don’t believe in soulmates… until they do.

🥀 like a timebomb ticking by @infinitelymint {M, 31k}

Louis loses everything. Harry's still there.

🥀 Cowboy Like Me by Rearviewdreamer / @all-these-larrythings {M, 29k}

Going legit and starting over in a small town was supposed to solve all of Harry’s problems. That was until a string of robberies in wealthy towns brings him face-to-face with his rouge ex-partner and their dicey, unresolved past.

🥀 Get Out Of My Head (and I'll get out of yours) by Imogenlee / @imogenleewriter {E, 29k}

“You really that desperate, are you?” Despite it being a shitty thing to say, Harry didn’t mind too much, as the bitterness in Louis’ tone sounded like music to Harry’s ears. Harry was winning tonight. “Can’t find anyone new to be interested in you, so you try to hit on Zayn.”

“I can’t find someone interested in me?” Harry asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’re having a laugh, mate.”

“Yeah, well, where are they, then? Because from what I’ve heard, you’re here alone.”

“As if I’d bring anyone to somewhere I knew you’d be. I wouldn’t wish your presence on my worst enemy.”

“Aw,” Louis cooed in a way that made Harry want to slap him. “You’re saying I’m not your worst enemy?”

“For someone to be an enemy, you have to give a shit about them. So, no. You’re not even on the list.”

“Oh–kay. Well, it’s been lovely as always, gents,” Zayn said before knocking back the rest of his drink.

Or the one for the Bottom Harry Fic Fest where Harry bottoming is more of a side plot, because angst got in the way--but it doesn't really matter because the fest stopped existing when I was halfthrough.

🥀 some things fade (some never do) by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed {T, 25k}

Matching tattoos. He’d never thought he’d be the type for tattoos to begin with, let alone matching or magical ones, but once Harry had put the idea in his mind it had never quite managed to disappear. And it had made sense. With their relationship a long distance one, this was simply another way of feeling close to one another. Of knowing where the other was, how they felt. It had made so much sense.

Back then.

Three years after their break up, Harry calls.

🥀 Might've Took The Long Way by LiveLaughLoveLarry / @loveislarryislove {M, 21k}

It's been two years since Harry and Louis broke up. They were that couple in high school -- you know the one; been together forever, hopelessly in love, all over each other, the whole nine yards. Even when Louis went off to university, they found a way to make the distance work.

Until they broke up.

Now Harry is back in town, and no matter how many times Louis tells himself they can't be together, they keep falling right back into each other.

“They got a name?” Bebe asks.

“What?”

“Your ghosts,” she says, her voice suddenly soft. “If you want to tell me, I mean. I know I said I wouldn’t ask, but. Sometimes it can help to exorcise them.” She pauses, and chuckles. “Other times, vodka works better than sage.”

Louis holds his breath for a moment, building the courage, before he finally murmurs, “Harry.”

“Sorry?”

“Harry,” Louis says again. The name feels like a time bomb in his mouth, but it hasn’t blown up yet. “His name was -- is -- Harry.”

🥀 lost in my head by YesIsAWorld / @louandhazaf {E, 12k}

Louis had been, until about a year prior, the love of Harry’s life.

🥀 Fuck You For Ruining New York City For Me by galactic_larry / @galacticlarry {T, 11k}

Harry met Louis in college and fell in love with him in record time. Louis broke up with him in their New York apartment, so Harry left the city for good. Except now he’s back, visiting with his new boyfriend.

What happens when they run into each other at a bar three years after breaking up?

🥀 give me things to stay awake by embodied {E, 10k}

It’s shitty and it’s counterproductive and it’s self-indulgent, but he lets it become a thing. On Saturday nights Harry goes out and gets so pissed he can’t stand, and when the bartender cuts him off he rings Louis and is in his car within an hour. It’s not a cycle he’s proud of, but it’s also something he can’t resist, and he keeps doing it as long as Louis keeps showing up.   AU. It's been a year since Louis broke up with Harry.

🥀 Now That It's Over by @lululawrence {NR, 8k}

“What are the odds we would both be at Mariano’s on a Thursday night?”

Louis’ shoulders tensed. What the hell was he doing here?

“Harry? Hi? The odds are pretty crazy, yeah.”

Harry smiled down at Louis the way he used to, but there was also a glint in his eye that Louis absolutely did not like. Harry was also dressed in his favorite black and white striped women’s jeans and a printed shirt only he would ever be able to pull off. It was quite rude of him to come and interrupt Louis, particularly while looking so good. Louis hadn’t seen him since he’d finished moving his shit out of what was once their shared flat, so this being the first time seeing him wasn’t exactly providence in Louis’ mind.

Or the one where Harry and Louis broke up two months ago, and Harry just might be sabotaging Louis' dates.

🥀 Unspoken by Speechless / @smokingluckiesalltheway {E, 5k}

Harry and Louis broke up when they were nineteen. They see each other after six years.

"I'm not going to be the guy you fuck on the side while you settle down with your blonde wife." Maybe it's the way he phrased it, something about what Louis has just said tears a small laugh out of him. "I don't want that." Harry says, serious again. There is no reason for him to keep on holding onto Louis' scarf like this, but he does. "The last time I saw you I thought we would fix it." Louis' the one laughing this time, his vision blurry. "The last time you saw me was right before you got on a train and fucked off." "And I thought we would fix it." Harry repeats, his voice shot. "I thought you'd come."

🥀 Not yet a breach, but an expansion by theweightofmywords / @lil0 {NR, 2k}

“I don’t understand why we keep running into each other,” he says as his hands grip his hair in frustration.

Shaking himself out of his reverie, he scoffs. “You know why, Harry."

Fate, it seems, still holds their lives in her ceaseless orbit.

[daffi-990]

remember to remember me | the lightning amnesia fic | Explicit | 31K | Completed | Read on AO3

cover art by @daffi-990

Something is wrong.

“Buck”, Eddie says his name slowly, like he’s a deer that could easily be startled, “do you remember Monday night, after I got home from working a shift without you?”

“We had a few beers and you told me about that crazy call.”

“Yes. And do you remember what happened afterwards?”

“Uh — no? Should I?”

The ice in his veins spreads and soon his whole body feels frozen, like a bucket of icy water has just been dumped all over him.

“Oh shit, did I drink too much on an empty stomach again? That always leaves me way drunker than I should be and I can’t remember shit the next day”

Buck doesn’t remember.

He doesn’t remember.

Eddie’s entire world crashes down around him. He feels like his body has stopped working. He doesn’t know if he’s breathing but he’s pretty sure his heart has stopped.

Buck’s memories of them can’t be gone.

OR

Buck and Eddie finally get together only for lightning to strike a few days later, leaving Buck with no memories of them ever becoming a couple.

[rookie-lou]

Forget-Me-Not, Whumptober day 15

Chapter 15: Moment of clarity

After Doc saw the scandals Lightning comes to his house to confront him, unaware that his mentor sees him differently now. Luckily Mater is there to help Lightning with his broken heart.

[disillusioneddanny]

Hi Dis! Have a Self-Love! Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💕💗

hi yes, I forgot to answer this lol. Hiiii owl <3

Don't Get Sad, Get Even -- It's a reverse Robins au with Red Hood Tim and Robin Jason who looks up to Tim.

2. In Our Family Portrait (Let's Play Pretend)  -- DC only fic where Tim goes to take care of a cursed Bruce and the others realize how badly they treat him

3. Leave All Your Longing Behind - New Demon Twins fic where Danny has amnesia and doesn't know that Damian is his twin brother and Damian is in denial that his brother is actually alive

4. Lightning in a Bottle - DoM fic where Jason is mute and Danny owns a coffee shop in Crime Alley

5. You'll Find a Rainbow - Damian/Danny fic where Danny is the son of Harley and Joker

this was a lot harder than I thought it would be lol. i have too many fics to pick just five /lh

[taddymason]

Hi. So Jay called Zane "equipment". I also think Jay was the first one of the ninja to call Zane brother (and I think it was the first time any of them called each other brothers). I firmly believe you should include Jay calling Zane equipment in LP (whether he tells it to Zane face to face or whether he tells it to the others). I think you can get some angst from there.

LMAO, I'M SORRY JDNRHENSKA. I just rewatched the scene where Jay refers to Zane as an equipment and idk why I thought of Lightning Pin. (See? This is how much your fic has affect me).

YESS TRUST ME, THERE WILL BE A LOT OF ANGST WITH THIS TOO

I have already left several hints in LP of Jay seeing Zane only as a machine, like when in chapter 12 he thinks of Zane as property of the Administration or tries to justify his own actions thinking that it was "electrocution or incineration."

I hope the show itself has interactions like that that result from the things Jay learned in the Administration. As if leaving aside the whole issue of amnesia, almost no one talks about the consequences that being in a place where no one's life is valued may have on Jay's attitude. Even in canon where Jay doesn't care much about his job and it doesn't make sense to him, he doesn't stop to question much about what he has to do either (after all, he still wanted to arrest Bonzle even if he wasn't entirely convinced. ).

And in this AU, even when he and Kaida know that the Administration and what they do there is shit, it's not like they actively seek to be better people or stop to think why what they do is wrong. So yeah, I want to explore more of the ninjas' reactions to things like that.

[buddierecs]

hurt/comfort buddie fics

all explicit rating - 18+ only!!!! make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

when it's you i'm with (everything goes quiet) by: withoutthetiger "eddie can't speak after he and christopher are in an accident, but somehow he asks buck to stay while he recovers. buck can't imagine wanting to be anywhere else, and even in the silence that lingers between them, they both find a way to say everything." word count: 56k important tags: different first meetings au, muteness, intimacy, feeling realisation, friends to lovers, phone sex, blow jobs, rimming, anal sex take my hand and don't you ever let go by: sourwolfseblaine "buck takes care of eddie when he starts acting differently after a close call." word count: 4.2k important tags: emotional hurt/comfort, soft!buddie, gentle sex, comfort sex, anal sex, top!evan buckley, bottom!eddie diaz, blow jobs

crossed wires, words and.... wets by: znks "sometimes, after a short pitstop through some yearning, your bff accidentally kissing you can lead to wonderful things" word count: 7.4k important tags: miscommuication, accidental kissing, getting together, shower sex, thigh fucking, comeplay, marking eddie diaz vs the feelings by: elvensorceress "eddie dives into the mysteries of attraction, romantic love, and asexuality because there's a good chance he's fallen in love with his best friend. aka demisexual!eddie figures out he’s demi and finds the happily ever after he’s been longing for" word count: 62k important tags: demisexual!eddie diaz, getting together, sexuality crisis, slow burn, sexual tension, anal sex, hand jobs to feel the need of your touch by: honestlydarkprincess "the one where buck is touchstarved and desperate for eddie. they fuck but it's also really sweet." word count: 7.5k important tags: pining!evan buckley, light dom/sub, oral sex, anal sex, barebacking, evan buckley has a praise kink, dom!eddie diaz, sub!evan buckley, porn with feelings it's the softness that breaks you by: bigfootsmom "the one where buck has more issues with intimacy than he had originally thought." word count: 6.1k important tags: dom!eddie diaz, sub!evan buckley, safe word use, established relationship, evan buckley has a praise kink five times eddie diaz used grindr (and one time he didn't) by: daniwib "eddie diaz likes men. he thinks. this is the story of how he explores his sexuality." word count: 72k important tags: gay!eddie diaz, first time, anal sex, friends with benefits, blow jobs, there was only one bed, porn with plot, pining

remember to remember me by: daffi_990_ao3 "buck and eddie finally get together only for lightning to strike a few days later, leaving buck with no memories of them ever becoming a couple." word count: 31k important tags: temporary amnesia, sad!eddie diaz, getting together, buckley-diaz family feels, frottage, blow jobs, riding, bottom!eddie diaz, top!evan buckley

general audience rating hurt/comfort fics mature rating hurt/comfort fics