#the job security is really something
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Honestly I see Jimmy's refusal to put Curly out of his misery less about his weird feelings of envy or his delusions but the fact Curly is all but stated to be a shield to Jimmy from his actions and people seeing the worst in him.
The only characters that Jimmy really interacts with one on one before the crash are Curly and Anya, two individuals he has wildly different relationships with. It's likely that Curly really did most of the talking between them as the pilots and the rest of the crew as staff. They didn't know of Jimmy's more reprehensible behaviors cause they never really had the chance to and Jimmy is subconsciously aware. If they had disliked him more than Anya would have told Swansea earlier or even Daisuke when things got really bad.
It's why he takes the immediate opportunity to blame Curly; He's the shield. He's saved Jimmy's ass more times than he can count and more times than Jimmy would ever admit. Even when he can't really do it anymore, he mentally shields himself from his own faults by putting Curly between them. Letting Curly die puts too much on him because he doesn't know how to function without a safety net.
In the end Curly only lives because Jimmy needs the idea that Curly will inevitably make things better to stay alive, meaning Curly has to live, no matter how much it pains him to do so.
#in short Jimmy doesnt only care about Curly#he only cares about the securtiy that Curly provides him#and i headcanon that the reason he tried to kill everyone is because he knew it was only a matter of time befor Curly realized this wasnt#somethgin benign Jimmy did that he could smooth over but somethign that Curly would repremand and condem him for and take his security away#like yes Curly did not react fast enough or strongly enough to what Anya told him but you could see him showing more concern over it as I d#understand the psychology behind people and more specifically men like Curly as he is hearing something horrible his friend did to someone#he cares about but has less of a bond with. he feels the need to protect his crew as people first and sadly Jimmy is still the person he wa#closest too yet I still think everything happened too fast for Curly to process as would you not grapple with the fact your closest friend#is a monster you must personally deal with? or that he did something so vile to someone else you have become protective over? Would you not#think of the relative power that friend holds and how if you approuch this wrong it could end badly for everyone? He had all these thoughts#but not enough time to think about them. Also how Jimmy was one of the main people in his personal life he felt a need to protect seeing as#he got him this job. Like imagine the one person you are really trying to make good is still bad after everythign and now you have to be th#hand of judgment youve shielded them from for so long like I do not think Curly handeled the initial situation with Anya correctly I dont#think it was the case of him not believing but not really knowing what to do and feel about it as a friend of both parties the captain and#guy going through his own shit and it says so much that he was dealing with all that so well compared to Jimmy who got everyone killed cuz#he thought being captain would be like sitting on the thrown and not emotionally mentally and physically taxing like I cant say Curly is th#best person due to his inaction but he is a good person doing the best with the knowledge and shitty resources he has cuz like also Id just#be terrified that my suicidal and nilihst bestie who clearly has an inferiority complex around me is the copilot who has access to the most#to the most important parts of the ship and the means to kill us all if he feels like him or his security are being threatened like#Anya and Curly just deserved better because they get put through the ringer like just put him in a class to teach him to be less trusting#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing curly#mouthwashing anya#mouthwashing jimmy#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing spoilers
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How did you get your job on sunny? I really wanna go into the entertainment industry.
iv told th story b4 but i got onto th show bcuz i just happened to b n th right place @ th right time
was working on smthn completely different nd drunk on th camera truck during one of our wrap days me, the DIT, nd the loader wer talking abt fave tv shows nd when i said tht always sunny was mine th loaders just like "oh lol funny im the 1st AC on that. i can get u some days if u want" ???
so i...did some days...then i did a season...and now im core crew i guess
#FUCK this just reminded me that i ghosted him a week ago after starting the conversation OOPS ty anon#but yea the entire industry is CONNECTIONS and luck. i never know how to give advice on that. its who u know.#college is a waste of time nd money but also one of th best places to make industry connections. hellish conundrum#working as a grip or a PA is a good way to get in on stuff bt doesnt always provide a ladder upwards or into specifics if u have an end goa#its honestly...a terrible industry....i wdnt actually recommend it to people lmfao its a super unstable way to exist theres no job security#im unemployed for most of my life and just gotta pray i work enough hours to keep my health insurance#newsflash! havnt had that in years!#but yea its....idk man. im lucky for my opportunities but overall its really dire out here#and its just ben getting worse and worse#the motto in the industry going around right now is 'survive until '25' bcuz of just how few job opportunities there are#literally everyone is struggling lol.....do something else#ask#ramblings#anon
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In truth hes very proud of Senjuro for always trying so hard.. eventually he'll manage to say it out loud.
#rui and senjuro are so.. ugh collapses to the floor they aren't Really children of neglect but by god .#(youre projecting) I KNOW.😭 and ill mumble more at the end tags#senjuro rengoku#rui ayaki#demon slayer#kimetsu no yaiba#senrui#kny#my art#like ugh#most of the cast of kny is suffering neglected child syndrome . among other things but that list is too long.another day perhaps#Senjuro is a child of neglect. yes Kyojuro was there and did a wonderful job while he could but. its undeniable that Sen has been neglected#and i feel it. in every interaction senjuro has. he is so very kind and so very willing to help but has so little avenues to go through#with Rui its projection in a very personal way but also i just really feel it in my bones something was off#like his parents seem very kind but also like so many instances of his backstory felt. hand motions. why wasnt someone there.#yknow what i mean?????#anyway whats fucking point am i trying to make#rui and senjuro are both children of neglect and their veiws and mindsets are heavily affected by this and i think together#they could take care of eachother and give eachother a sort of security theyve been missing for so very long#they will be eachothers loving home.#coughs. sorry anyways#ive been keeping it to myself because .worries of no one caring you know how it is#but i have an au very dear to me where Rui assists Senjuro in becoming a kakushi and secret demon slaying and eventually Shinobu#starts helping him as well :-]#senjuro deserves to be taught how to fence if normal swordplay doesnt fucking work#also realizing very late that some reasons i adore senrui are why i adore endouma. i am one note. nobody look at me
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i feel like the makeup standards are not necessarily going to get Worse, just. stay the Same. "raised by sephora and ulta" christ alive yall act like this shit is new. as if this hasnt been the standard to blast young girls with makeup ads and shit via magazine and tv and imposed beauty standards anyway. the only real difference is like, idk, accessibility of tutorials for how to apply it well
#toy txt post#spoken as. a no makeup bitch#altho i have also been accused by a terf of wearing a pound if makeup for wearing. visible lipstick in a selfie. and that was It#the actual Beauty Standard has largely stayed the exact fucking same of like making your skin texture as fake as possible#that was the standard back then too but it was harder to achieve /know how to do it cos there werent tutorials the same way now#also yes sephora and ulta are evil and all that but like the same amount theyve always been.#yall really acting like these imposed beauty standards being exposed to children is like a new unique tiktom thing thats never happened#before. and yall blaming instagram are no fuckin better. this has been happening The Entire God Damn Time#also theres something rubbing me about the way this is getting talked about. 'she did all thos other arbitrary bullshit except this#One Thing! the discrimination against this one thing is awful!#and like. it is. but i feel like we could address that while also maybe stepping back a tiny bit further and questioning these arbitrary#standards of professionalism too while we're at it#why does she have to have a blazer either? why do the earrings have to be understated#why do the colors have ti be bland and boring? why does he hair have to be a natural color and gender conforming ?#etc etc etc#like if we're accepting all that other shit the ppl upset about this could acknowledge she might experience similar discrimination for say#very obvious goth or punk-y makeup or anything a little too far outside the bounds of the acceptable beauty standard#everyone is pissed about 'eyeliner sharp enough to kill a man' but theyd be saying nothing if she was discriminated for fuckin#big wings and black lipstick bc well thats Obviously not professional standard makeup. okay?#if we change how we look at professional standards of dress and makeup as a whole to include Fucking Freak Bitches#then it would be a lot easier to include No Makeup in there as welllllll#idk#im a no makeup bitch with blue hair whos only ever worked in warehouses so they didnt give too much of a shit about my lack of makeup#or blue hair as long as i didnt show up in like flip flops which is a Reasonable dress code bc its got an actual fucking reason#(safety so you dont lose your goddamn toes to a box or a grate or some shit) vs it makes the office corpo bros sad#anyway idk if you have the privilege to get away with it i think you should dress weirder in the office to get them used to weirder dress#maybe instead of Suddenly going No Makeup sort of slowly lessen the amount so its not a Sudden change or smth#again: if you have the privilege and job security to get away with it#also also also: easier to get away with if you were to say. mask. js. they cant get mad at schrodingers lack of lipstick
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#hm. im in limbo. but at least i can draw again at last. ive never spent so long not wanting to draw. it was terrible#my job search lasted 4 days before i secured a position at target but i dont start until the 26th so im drifting until then#it feels so weird. like i dunno. i keep thinking abt jobs in a weird way now bc i just sorta drifted into what i do#weird academic stuff but i think most jobs arent like being a grad student and that never really occured to me#i dunno why. i could have done so many things but here i am. an ecologist mostly. i dunno. well see what the summer brings#maybe ill grow some social skills. its sorta weird but like the medication has made my head less terrible with intrusive thoughts. like i#can actually drive my car without hyperventilating which is fucking wild. so Maybe ill grow some confidence abt interacting with the world#going back in the fall still seems impossible rn but so does starting a job somewhere else. but i dunno#not where i expected to be in my life. im just lucky i dont have to worry much abt money#especially bc i got an ultrasound done so they cold make sure something wasnt wrong with my uterus#and its fine. guess it just hates me but that means i spent like 350 dollars for a 10min scan that showed nothing#ay. the us medical system#anyway. i guess ill continue drifting until the 26th#probably i should find something to do. or work on my old unpublished data#unrelated
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Thinking a lot about pro heroes who became pros after All Might's debut but then had to witness his final fight and adjust amidst the fall out of that. 'Uh oh! The defining pillar of your life, career, and society is gone' kind of thoughts
#like. obv pro heroes are very significant in universe#in a one part savior two parts celebrity kind of way#but if you became a hero during the last what? fifteen years? however long all might has been all might#you have spent your entire life in a highly visible somewhat all consuming job#with a security blanket#no matter what you do you can never be expected to be the GREATEST hero#but likewise if there's ever a truly dangerous threat there's a good chance that That Guy will take care of it#and NOW after having only this experience#and having 'coworkers'/peers who also have only this experience#the symbol of peace is gone#the pressure is on#to step it up. form a team. do something#it's bonkers and i kind of wish that the pro hero we focused on in the wake of all might's retirement#was not endeavor#like i GET it but i'm like holding edgeshot or someone by the shoulders like tell me all of ur thoughts. what are u feeling.#cementoss all might stan what's going through ur head buddy#don't even get me started on 'all might my coworker all might'#'he's at the desk next to me and his ring tone is really cringe'#liza blather#liza watches mha
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Alexsandr💙: I watched the loki series finale yet again
And one of the parts of the ending that always gets me is how B-15 approaches Mobius at the cubicle after speaking to Ouroborus.
I wish their friendship could have been expanded more upon in a higher depth, but it's the smaller moments like those, especially in these last scenes between them, that encapsulates it a bit more strongly.
She saw how distant he's been, not really himself since Loki dismantled the loom and has been out there. She takes a much more casual and personal touch in the conversation, wanting to check in with him. And he jumps to updating her ahoit the cases, and she let's him lead the topic there, but I'm almost positive that wasn't what she had been asking him about.
#once our next second job is secured and settled#i really want to read through sequel fics for the series#something definitely filled to the brim with comfort#i both love and am hurt by bittersweet type endings#i thank the stars and writers for the fact that fanfic exists#loki series
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AHHHHHH
#this post brought to you by: me#i. applied for a preapproval letter for a mortgage yesterday. and spoke to a realtor to start finding me houses#i want to move several states away which further complicated things. but the houses there are CHEAP#like under 100k for a 2 bedroom move in ready#anyways i got approved for 80k with a 20k down payment. and im FREAKING THE FUCK OUT#and because i got that pre app letter i have a loan officer calling me today to talk#and we literally work at the same bank so i can SEE that hes active and hasnt read my message#even though its been 45 minutes. KEVIN MESSAGE ME BACK. IM NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO FOCUS UNTIL I DO THIS CALL#AHHHHHHH S C R E A M. it might happening!!!! i might be finally.mov8ng out in a few months!!!#i mgiht be a HOMEOWNER by the end of the year#i have been saving money for this since i was. 16? 17?#ive had a good well paying job since i was 18.#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#once i have a house then i start job searching in that area. and start getting really serious about LEAVING my very good job#which is soooo scary. this job was supposed to be my lifelong career. but then everyone fucking moved to other states and left me behind#so theres no point staying here.#i might never have this kind of job security again.#but also my realtor said that theres a lot of bank jobs in that area so maybe itll be easy to find something#on the fence on if i tell my parents that im Making Moves right now#on one hand its hard to not talk about it becuae im STRESSED TF OUT#but on the other hand when i tentatively mentioned the state i want to move to#richard started yelling and swearing el oh el#might be better to wait and avoid the tension as long as possible?#but also i dont know how they can stay angry when its literally my best option#the other places where my friends live either have 0 opportunity and high housing prices. or are even moe liberal than where im going#idk. why do half of my problems come down to “my parents will be mad” like im a 12 year old or something. shit fucking sucks#this is why i want to get out of here#also it feels weird and bad to talk to my friends about how stressed i am about buying a house when all of them are stressed about#not being able to make rent or something. my problems feel like a brag in a really odd and shitty way. but hey!#if this works out maybe ill start being stressed about how im going to make my mortgage payments! :') yay!
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Civilian Tim au where hes one of those guys whose job it is to just try to break into places just to see if he can
#tim drake#batman#dc#hes good at lying and charismatic what can he say#the superhero community all end up knowing him cause they end up breaking into the exact places hes hired to find the security weaknesses#he doesnt rat them out but he does fix the security issues they use to get in#and the hero community is really annoyed but eventually find out that if you ask him and give a good reason he'll break you in himself#leaves a little backdoor just the right size for a timmy shaped person#also timmy inherently coming across secret info about the company cause thats the nature of that job and most of the time he just has to be#like 'i do not see it' and move on w his day but also drops a tip to the local heros when its something concerning#idk i just think hed be good at it#kind of a gray hat hacker type but like also with the physical place as well
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I'm asking bc I'm considering going back to school and finishing my degree if I can but I'm insanely anxious about potential job and income stability. Any regrets? Advice for a stranger?
#i want to go all in on an art degree#like drawing and painting#but also considering double majoring in like acocunting or something#for that extra bit of possible job security?#lot of work though for a little guy#any advice or experience i would really appreciate...#goobabble#i hate wasting 40.hrs a week of my life on earth just so i can Exist and eat
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My DM after having been adding features to my character on DnDBeyond: oh my GOD you have so many weapons how do you have so many weapons good grief
As if he, playing all the Shopkeeps, wasn’t the one selling them all to me 😂
#I mean I get it he is running an entire universe of course he doesn’t remember everything every one of his players owns#but it was still a really funny interaction he was SO flabbergasted that I had this many weapons#buddy I am playing Literal Murderbot#and my friends need protecting#I spend most of my money on More Things To Protect My Friends With#like you’re counting this up after I’ve lost probably 10 hand axes already when I couldn’t recover my thrown weapons after battle#and yes I narrate picking up my thrown weapons and my DM decid s if I recover anything#he’s let me recover thrown items I was SURE were lost in the battle#like I’ve used up 10 handaxes in a single battle and thought they were all lost because I missed half my throws#and he grants me collecting 8 out of ten since I rolled high on an investigation check to look over the battlefield and gather them#so I have a crazy stash#I am here to keep my friends alive and literally nothing else#I have one job#I am security and I’ll die on this hill any and every time#every time I get paid for something I buy more consumable weapons#I need to be able to chuck something across the battlefield at the thing that’s attacking my buddy#i couldn’t care less about what’s attacking ME#I’ve put enough of my stats into/taken enough feats that I can presumably last a whole battle regardless of what’s biting me rn#so I can spend my action to demolish the threats to my friends#and ignore whatever has been chewing on my shoulder for three rounds#dungeons and dragons#dnd#murderbot
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conflicted!!!
#finally got the guts to start applying to other jobs#which obvi doesn’t guarantee that I’ll get an interview let alone an offer#but im also applying to non law jobs and im like ugh about being a lawyer so much of the time#but then when i think about not being one it feels weird??#but i hate court with every fiber of my being???#and after my time at small law firms im like lol no thanks I want a sliver of job security like just the tiniest amount#so if I do a non law job I’m like could I do something law later if I miss it or would nobody hire me at that point?#too bad teaching is so chaotic I’ve wanted to be a teacher forever :(#ugh and of course i don’t really care about work like work is just to pay for living and life is outside of work!!#so many tags thanks for reading if you did 😭#katie.txt
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my boss was sent from hell to kill me
#my supervisor stopped being my supervisor because he has like 12 jobs and they were all ballooning#so he had to start dropping some of them#but they are still ballooning wildly so i think more and more of his work is getting off-loaded onto me#which on the one hand means i have really good job security! and ill probably get a raise at some point!#but also means i keep getting handed half-finished projects that have super tight deadlines#so i have to untangle them and then finish them#on top of my normal stuff#and boy howdy am i worried that im going to screw something up and then everyone will know im a fraud and ill go to jail forever#im sure that posting on tumblr instead of working will make this easier and not harder!
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I don't wanna be alive anymore .
#theres no point in trying to get better . i cant even get a second to catchy breath before something new flips my life on its head#i have no one i can really look to for support and the person i thought wasy secure base turns out isnt that#i have nothing keeping me here really#my close friends and i rarely talk . the friends i do talk to are all superficial . im constantly uncomfortable#and my system is always disregulated#working even at my basically do nothing job is too much and i doubt ill be able to get on disability#my partner wants to leave the country asap with pr without me#soon ill be alone and have nothing anyway so whats the fucking point
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I started by telling myself I shouldn't feel bad that I didn't get all my planned chores done: Saturday is a rest day, and we've just finished three weeks of crunch at work. (Next week might also be crunch but probably not; the product ships at the end of the week but we should be in good enough shape already.)
But then I realized: I ran three errands in the morning, and did three chores in the evening--even if one of the chores was just "cook a healthy dinner" and two of the chores were banking-related on a website. (But one involved sending text messages, and one involved an actual phone call to customer service, so I can't even really say they were just on a website.) That's six things I got done on a rest day. I may have overscheduled by saying I'd do at least eight things, but still, six things is very good.
#the things I did NOT do all involve a hand drill so#I have about average upper body strength for a woman which means I do struggle somewhat with hand drills#although these chores all involve walls not metal so it's not THAT bad--except it's sideways rather than down so I can't lean into it#so yeah that's a level of chores I was not up to on my rest day#tomorrow is too booked up for chores--I told my friend I wanted to hang out with them this weekend#since I said no two weeks ago (I was fully booked) and they had to cancel on me last weekend#and normally we meet in the middle for hiking (we live 1.5 hours apart) but this time they suggested I drive all the way out#and I said yes before I realized that's what they were suggesting#so that's fine--but I can't do anything else beyond that tomorrow even just basic chores#which is a little bit getting to me because a house guest is coming to visit in four days#and I really need the shower curtain to be properly secured to the wall by then?#anything else is gravy--I already have clean sheets for her and everything--but THAT needs to be done#I've been living here almost two months and have only knocked the shower curtain down about three times so it's really not that bad#I even hang my towels on it and it's fine BUT I know how to do it? and I'm like professionally good at manipulating physical objects lol#like being a mechanic of sorts is literally a significant chunk of my job#whereas she doesn't pick up object-manipulation tasks easily--especially not involving gross motor skills#in fact when I mentioned it to her she was like yeah that was something she was not going to be able to handle#if I didn't have it properly installed by the time she arrived#so uh... well not today or tomorrow#and Monday and Tuesday I have work... and she's arriving Wednesday#ok realistically tomorrow night I'm just going to have to suck it up and get to drilling no matter how tired I am from driving and hiking
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I always pick the teacher/adult option if they're available in an otome game where you're a high school student not because it's "my thing" or whatever
I do it because once I've played for like thirty minutes I'm reminded that high school boys are only second to middle school boys when it comes to being annoying as FUCK, and that extends to the sparkly shiny bishie ones in otome games
#You know what's really disturbing? Variable Barricade#That game made me so fucking angry on so many levels#and the heroine's best friend being like ''I'm engaged to a thirty-something my parents picked and it's fine you just have to compromise!''#I mean that's just one thing that made me see red the entire concept is fucking disgusting from tip to tail. FUCK the people who made it#And I played Kuro to Kin to Akanai Kagi???? ''VariBari'' as its fans call it is so much more fetid than the yandere filled R-18 VN#Because it's so... insidious. It is so... so gross. The true ending was the only ending worth anything and it was like 3% of the damn game#It has the feel of one of those Hallmark Movies where the heroine goes to another dimension where she has a small town husband and kids#and the whole point is the movie is that while she initially resists and resents the whole isekai situation she realizes that...#...No... being a high-powered career woman with financial freedom and job security is not fulfilling...#...It's being a housewife to a guy in a small town with two kids and a puppy dog. It took her too long to realize! Thanks shittiest isekai
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