#the jewel of maru

[locitapurplepink]

"I'll soon be tested, don't know how. Wish they could guide me here and now, to help me get through this and someday become Queen."

[stardewremixed]

So... I was scrolling through fanart which turned into impromptu stream-of-consciousness writing prompts. I hope you like how it turned out.

WARNING: (Mild) smut, references to alcohol, drugs, and smoking. (Does not assume Farmer's gender).

Abigail - Organizes the town charity softball games, breaks a few windows (and a few hearts). Tough girl to hide her insecurities - you know the ones - her parents don't get her or support her and she's lonely as an only child (still living at home with her parents). She has this smug side smile when she's got you right where she wants you and will argue with you over trivial matters because she has to be right. She pitches in when there's a town disaster, the first to roll up her sleeves, not afraid to get dirty and work hard. Would absolutely be the tank in your DnD party. She dominates no matter what sphere she's in, including the bedroom. And Abigail is as wild and adventurous in bed as she is out of it. Oh and you always do it at the farmhouse because she's loud (and her parents are light sleepers).

Penny - shy and sweet as usual, intimidated by the ladies of the town, especially Abigail and Haley. Always carrying books, keeps her head down, and her heart is plagued by being the daughter of an alcoholic and a sailor who abandoned her mom. Dreams of a Beast to rescue her Beauty, would kill (metaphorically) for that library and yellow ball gown, but doesn't actually believe she's that pretty, even though she's stunning and educated and articulate, when she's not stumbling over her words in painful shyness. Reads everything she can get her hands on. Would write a children's novel if she could ever work up the courage to ask Elliott to be her editor. She is the blushy kind of lover and reads up on tips and tries to apply what she's learned. You think it's freaking adorable when she asks for 'sex lessons.'

Haley is not a natural blond (*gasp*) - we know! We were shocked too. She's notoriously vain but it's to make up for the fact that her mother was a supermodel and never had time to be a real mom, so she desperately wants attention and to be noticed as beautiful and worthy. Critiques her nose, the shape of her breasts, her thighs, her brows, her hair style, and hopes to someday love herself as much as her mirror does. Got the Dino tattoo on her lower back as a drunken dare from Emily and now she kinda likes it because it makes her not so perfect for once and that's a relief. She wears the best lingerie - pretty, feminine, lacy. And her fantasy she shares with you after a few too many Cosmopolitans? To do it in front of a full length mirror.

Emily - yes the girl absolutely presses paste jewels on her face because why not? She's the cool big sis (stepsister of Haley). The free spirit. Blue hair. Who cares? Other people's opinions don't really define her. Always wearing multiple necklaces and bracelets and rings. This girl has rings. Believes in crystal healing. Lets her sleeve slip off her shoulder after one too many drinks at half-price karaoke nights. She gives you that side-eye, daring you to take her home. And this girl has got some freaky passion (in a good way of course) and yes, she's flexible. It's not that she is really into one night stands, but she doesn't get hung up on the morality of sex. She just goes where the wind blows and enjoys every moment. No expectations. No labels. Just serious fun.

Maru - is a powerhouse genius with a sort of perma-frown on her face when she's concentrating that's somehow annoyingly cute. It's never quite good enough - whatever she happens to be working on. She has those glorious thick curls always bouncing around as she moves from project to project with eager determination. Summer humidity might create the great frizz storm, but she's too focused to bother taming it. Her rims keep it out of her eyes. Always a gadget or two in this girl's hands and she doesn't mind the Inspector jokes. She is far too serious about science and technology to worry about (or even notice) the random taunts of a more average intelligence population. But just because she's super smart doesn't mean she isn't kind. It just might take her longer to notice you, but that hyperfixation, those beautiful eyes, when they are on you, it's really special.

Leah- when doesn't she have paint on her nose? Dried clay on her clothes? Ink beneath her fingernails? Art is her life and the forest outside her door is a veritable landscape of dreams, the mountain tat on her sleeve a mere imitation. Her thick and wild red braid flows free and swishes back and forth as she moves and every once in a while she gets self-conscious. She knows she is pretty but she would rather have someone notice and appreciate her art. But there's something super sexy about the half-buttoned shirt, suspenders, and the nervous tuck of hair over her ear. People fall in love with her everyday but not everyone stays, as she's learned. Still she perseveres and pursues her love of art, capturing raw, pure moments away from her former bustling city life. When you offered to pose for her and be a subject for her art, it wasn't initially meant to be sexual. But she couldn't hide the flicker of interest in her eyes. And then a few weeks later when you finally kissed good night in her doorway, it was like a fire had been released. You tore each other's clothes off and did it right there standing up, then again halfway to the bed and finally made it to the bed for the third round.

Sebastian - the wild, just-rolled-outta-bed hair that's too long and his mother is always saying he should cut it, but he doesn't listen, just like the warnings she gives about the cigs perched between his lips ("those things will kill ya"). Multiple piercings, skulls on shirts, arm bands, the ripped hoodies - all symbols of his rebellious youth carried on because he can't shake the ghosts of his past. Secretly afraid that he is just a teenage boy trapped in an adult body. Hiding behind clouds of smoke and blue glowing screens make it easier to deal with the fact that he didn't follow his dreams. Freelance programmer. Dungeon master. Designing s video game. Lives in his mom's unfinished basement because it's quiet and Maru used to be scared of the dark. So when he does surface and you remember he's alive, it's actually a big deal. He made an effort and when you thank him, he just shrugs in that sexy casual way and says he wanted to see you today. It's simple but so meaningful. He's quiet but he loves you in simple ways - stealing glances from his computer, using coupons to buy your favorite foods at Pierre's, and delivering a piece of furniture you bought at his mom's shop (and conveniently 'forgot' so he would have to bring it to you, and he knows this and did it anyway). Oh and there was the time your computer crashed in the middle of the night (yes, really) and you were in the middle of applying for a farm grant and thought you lost everything you'd been working on for weeks, and you cried and called him, and he came over to fix it and recovered the data. And you may have made out and landed in bed together after (it was a dark and stormy night and the rain is like an aphrodisiac for you). You apologized a dozen times and said this isn't what you called him for and it wasn't supposed to be a midnight booty call. He laughs and kisses you gently and says he wouldn't have minded it if it was because he's wanted you badly for so long. And you went for round 2.

Sam has so much energy, too much, and he usually channels it into making mix tapes, half-finishing songs, pranking Morris and Shane at JojaMart, and skating half-pipe. But if you thought he was an empty airhead, think again. Behind the beanies, cut off sleeves, and ripped jeans, the crazy hair, and goofy smiles, there's a heart of gold. He will kneel down and tie Vincent's shoes for the five hundredth time, even though his kid bro should know by now how to do it. He'll carry those groceries all the way back to Evelyn's house for her, chattering about animal shapes in the cloud and a wicked sweet song he heard on the radio. Maybe someday he will write a jingle for the airwaves too. He will work a double shift so Shane can take Jas to swim lessons or the dentist or because Marnie was irresponsible again and left his god niece alone again late at night. And he will always buy his friends a round at the Saloon. Even if he's broke and spent all his coin on some vintage rock vinyls and the sugary cereal obsession of the week. He's a kid at heart, but he rocks hard and loves hard. That youthful exuberance is just what you need - bubble baths with rubber ducks, half-burnt pizza, dollar stor rose petals, and (root) beers in bed, making you giggle when he gives you foot massages, and tickling you with his tongue (oh yes, he knows all your sweet spots)!

Harvey may be older and mild-mannered, but he remembers little details about all his patients, whom he has come to know as friends and surrogate family. He never met his dad, his mom passed when he was a kid, and he was raised by his grandpa on canned pork and beans, microwave dinners, and model planes. His grandpa was a man of a few words, but they would paint models every evening. Sometimes they'd go out to the airstrip and watch planes take off and Grandpa would reminisce about the "good Ole days" when he still flew in the Air Force. And he always wore ties so the doc has kept up the tradition, and he still wears the coats with the elbow patches that smell of pipe tobacco and peppermint. And even though grandpa has been gone for a dozen or so years, Harvey still paints models most evenings. And every once in a while, he drives out to that airstrip with you to watch the planes while eating tunafish and pickle sandwiches and sipping wine in paper cups. And when he holds your hand, when he puts his arm around you, when he makes love to you, it's like he fits in your life and your body perfectly. Oh yes! The doctor is in!

Elliott - for all his flowery prose, his day to day speech is actually pretty down to earth once you get to know him. Maybe he comes across as a bit of a snob with his extensive vocabulary, but he really just wants to impress you, not turn you off. He (literally) likes long walks on the beach, dreamy piano sonatas, and long soulful ballads. On Chat nights you can find him loosening his ties, letting his hair down, and kicking back a pint with his BFF at the bar. He is never awake before 9:30 or 10 because his writer brain comes alive late at night. He has a flawless complexion (and he's proud of his skin care and hair routine). Inspiration might strike anywhere so he always carries a pen and notepad in his pocket and says things like "can I quote you on that?" for the Pelican Town Times, a newspaper he's trying to revive and has a circulation of maybe 3 people. He's always publishing poems under a pseudonym but his unpublished novel is his pride and joy and he doesn't let anybody read it so when he finally shares an excerpt with you one day it's a really important moment. And of course, when he does finally publish, the dedication is to you, which will make you cry, and he also dedicate it to the particularly bothersome seagull, which makes you laugh, the one that always squawks at the most inopportune times like when you two are trying to "have a romantic moment." His bed might be a little creaky and his cabin a bit drafty, but he treats you and your body like royalty (and to regular nightly full body massages).

Alex - yeah, he's not a complicated guy. He likes sports, surf, and sun. Granny has been his favorite, the first woman in his heart, and he's kinda spoiled by all her love and attention (yes she still cuts the crusts off his sandwiches and does his laundry), but he isn't a brat. He can fix a leaky roof, a leaky sink, a leaky sprinkler system. He mows the entire practice field at the high school in the spring, rakes leaves in the fall and shovels snow in the winter for his neighbors. He still sells ice cream from time to time in the summer, but usually works as a seasonal lifeguard on Ginger Island. Sure, he might be a bit disconnected and doesn't always know what his partners want, but when he's wrong and you tell him, he admits it. And while he can lift you up on his shoulders so you can pick fruit in the orchard and he has the stamina of a Greek god in bed, he doesn't brag about it (at least not very often). He really just wants to make you happy above all else. Oh and he wants to be a dad someday.

Shane was like a drug, in the beginning - you're addicted to this man, dad bod, scruffy face, and all. You love him in spite of his mean and grumpy exterior. Somehow insults turn into foreplay. Maybe it's toxic but you don't care. This man sets records in bed, and he's not a one-hit wonder. As you start showing him affection and stick around despite his numerous attempts to scare him off, he realizes you're here to stay and maybe he can have something of a life again. So he cleans himself up, goes to therapy, quits drinking, and detoxes. Boy! It's not pretty. But it's worth it to him if it means he can have you. And that makes you love him all the more. Sure he's still addicted to Joja colas, but that's really not so bad. Nothing fazes him. Chasing down cows in a thunderstorm, setting Jas' broken arm, putting out a barn fire, rescuing you from a capsized fishing boat, carrying you out from the mines for the umpteenth time, even a chicken landing on his head while you're discussing favorite sex positions in the garden. Come on. That should have elicted a laugh. He's come a long way from that scowling drunk in the corner at the Saloon who just wanted angry hookup sex. He has become your rock just like you were for him all those years ago.

[elena-of-avalor-polls]

[sdv-lostatsea]

Stardew Valley Rings

So if you've ever played Sunhaven, marriage candidates will give the player a wedding ring that is symbolic of the dateable. And I wanna know what the sdv bachelor/ettes' rings would look like.

For example Maru would probably have a black band with stars and moons carved in. But what about the others??? Jewels, cut, colors, etc.

I wanna paint them but I need ideas and I'm screwing up the ads based on my search history already 😅

[leifygreeens]

What the Bachelor/ettes Would Dress Up as for Halloween

Here’s a short one for today. Happy Halloween, everyone!

Warnings: Relatively short. Mentions of fake blood. Enjoy <3

Sam

Used a werewolf costume but is supposed to be the Big Bad Wolf

Probably cut up one of his flannels for the costume

Jodi is very upset about that, it was a nice flannel!

Has a full wolf mask that opens when he talks

Vincent screamed bloody murder when Sam came out of his bedroom

Apparently Sam was unaware that Vincent has a phobia of werewolves

The More You Know™

He felt a little bit bad about that, but thankfully was able to calm down his little brother eventually

Seb

A wizard Rasmodius is amused

Probably was going to wear it for a cosplay to comic-con years ago but ended up not being able to go

He’s got a full gray beard, with long billowing robes and everything

Probably has a scepter that he made himself out of paper mache and clay

Definitely wears a wizard hat, too

But the robes are so long that he almost lands on his face multiple times throughout the night

Eventually he resorts to holding up the ends of his robes like a princess

Abigail and Sam cannot stop laughing

Alex

Dressed up as Ken

Didn’t want to bleach his hair blonde, but the spirit is there!

Probably has a pink neck tie and a pink button up polo

Takes his role very seriously

Probably learned the choreo for “I’m Just Ken”

Also got Dusty a glittery pink collar for the occasion

Calls literally every woman in town “Barbie” for the whole night

George is weird about it, but Evelyn is having a blast lmao

Elliott

Dressed up as Mark Twain

He carries around a fake raven skull for the bit

Waxes poetic about death and mortality

Probably quotes a few of Twain’s books but only the very obscure bits that only another “Twain connoisseur” would recognize

Leah tries to comfort him as best she can when no one recognizes him

Even though no one recognizes her either

Shane

A mummy

Wrapped himself in toilet paper and called it a day lmfao

Jas makes a stink about not matching with him though

She has a gorgeous fairy dress and was going to wear her bunny-jewel slippers

Marnie was going to put glitter in her hair and everything

But nope

Uncle Shane was going as a mummy, and so she wanted to be a mummy

It’s the cutest thing in the world

Shane is cheesing the whole night, and the rest of the town is terribly endeared by the two of them

Marnie doesn’t even mind the money spent on Jas’ original costume

They look too happy to be upset about it, anyway

Harvey

Dressed up as a homicidal/mad doctor

He’s not terribly creative, and he’s already got all of the costume pieces anyway

Everyone asks him why he didn’t dress up

He is very perturbed by that

Of course he dressed up! Don’t you see the fake blood on his coat?

What about the wild hair and the dark circles??

No? Seriously?

Maru

A robot!

Goes all-the-fuck-out

Has fully functioning extra limbs, probably a voice manipulator as well

Spent months on her physical costume, and Penny helped her with the make-up on the day of

Bought colored contacts that make her eyes look mechanical

Probably also built a candy dispenser into the suit so when Jas and Vincent run around getting candy from all of the villagers, she just presses a button on her wrist band and her stomach opens up to reveal a bowl of candy

The kids love her

Penny

She dressed up as Red Riding Hood, but with a twist!

She’s also a wolf!

Her and Sam are doing a duo costume

So she’s got the little dress and the hood, but the edges are tattered and she’s got insane costume makeup on

No wolf mask for her, unfortunately, but the effort she put into every other aspect of it makes up for it

Is horrified to find that Vincent is terrified of her

She probably feels bad about it for a few weeks after that and vows never to touch a wolf costume ever again

Abigail

Abigail dressed up as a skeleton

Got a few black clothes and drew an anatomically correct skeleton on them with bleach and paintbrushes

It’s wildly impressive

The sweatshirt she used will 100% be worn again, even when it isn’t Halloween

Got a face paint palette and made her face look like an actual skull

Probably pinned her hair back under a black wig cap or something to keep it cohesive

When she shows up for the festival, no one actually knows it’s her because she’s covered head-to-toe

Also has full-eye contacts that make her scleras black

Confuses the hell out of the skeletons Marlon has in those old cages, also confuses Marlon for like half a second before he realizes that it’s a costume

Haley

Barbie. Obviously.

Her and Alex are also doing a duo costume!

Has her hair in a high ponytail 

Everything is glittery, sparkly, and pink, pink, pink

Did her nails even pinker and sparklier

Probably has a little purse with a stuffed chihuahua in it

Abandons that idea when she sees Dusty, though

He looks so handsome with his pink collar, you know?

She posts pictures of their costumes on her socials after the night is over

Leah

Dressed up as Leonardo Da Vinci

Everyone thinks she’s just some old French Noble or something

Which breaks her heart

And not just because Leonardo was Italian

Oh, except for Haley!

Haley knows who she is right off the bat, and compliments her costume very genuinely

Leah feels a little better after that, until she has to run away and comfort Elliott

“I’ve got a raven skull and everything!” / “I know, I know.”

Someone save her lmfao

Emily

Made her whole costume from scratch

She’s a strawberry fairy!

She makes a gorgeous pink tulle dress with embroidered strawberries and fairy wings sewn to the back of it

And she made a headband with some poseable wiring and green cloth to look like strawberry leaves

Her shoes are some chunky pink mary jane “flats”

Also probably made strawberry charms to clip onto the straps

Has a basket full of strawberry candies that she passes out to everyone

Haley helped her do her makeup, and she’s got painted freckles on her cheeks to look like seeds

Altogether she’s the cutest fucking thing anyone has ever seen

[deathmetalangel]

ENVY’S MASTERLIST

this includes every character i write for and a link to their current personal master lists if i have works out for them (warnings may vary and minors dni)

this is in no particular order of character btw but my favorites will have a neat little asterisk

refer to what i don’t and do write in my separate post. also this is constantly being updated so don’t mind it much. you can always request a character if it’s not listed there’s no harm in asking :)

ADVENTURE TIME

- marceline*

- princess bubblegum

- marshal lee*

- finn

- fiona

AKAME GA KILL!

- esdeath*

- tatsumi

- akame

- kurome

AMERICAN HORROR STORY

- tate langdon*

- violet harmon

- kyle spencer

- nora montgomery

- moira o’hara

APEX LEGENDS

- bloodhound (no smut)

- wraith

- wattson

- octane

- loba

- revenant

- lifeline

- valkyrie

- crypto

AVATAR

- jake sulley*

- neytiri

- kiri

- neteyam*

- lo’ak

- aonung

- tsireya

AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER

- prince zuko*

- princess azula*

- sokka*

- katara

- aang

- suki

- yue

-jett

- ty lee

- mai

BIG MOUTH

- judd birch*

- val bilzerian*

- connie

- mona

BOKU NO HERO ACADEMIA

- izuku midoriya

- keigo takami

- touya todoroki

- shoto todoroki

- katsuki bakugo

- himeko toga

- tomura shigaraki

- tamaki amajiki

CALL OF DUTY

- simon ‘ghost’ riley

- john ‘soap’ mctavish

- könig

- valeria garza*

- alejandro vargas*

COBRA KAI/ KARATE KID

- robby keene

- miguel diaz*

- johnny lawrence

- daniel larusso

- tory nichols

- eli ‘hawk’ moskowitz*

- demetri alexopoulos

DARLING IN THE FRANXX

- zero two

- hiro

- mitsuru*

- ichigo

DEATH NOTE

- misa amane

- light yagami

- l

DEMON SLAYER

- tanjiro kamado*

- nezuko kamado

- kyojuro rengoku*

- giyu tomioka*

- shinobu kocho

- sanemi shinazugawa*

- genya shinazugawa*

- zenitsu agatsuma

- inosuke hasibira*

- muichiro tokito

- mitsuri kanroji

- iguro obanai*

- tengen uzui

HAZBIN HOTEL/ HELLUVA BOSS

- alastor* (i fully respect his asexuality so no smut :3 since he’s not canon aro i still write for him)

- angel dust

- charlie morningstar

- vaggie

- loona

- millie

- moxxie

- verosika mayday

- stolas goetia

- barbie wire

- striker

- octavia goetia

- adam*

- lute

- lucifer morningstar*

- rosie

- the vees

HOCUS POCUS

- max dennison

- thackery binx

- sarah sanderson

MARVEL

- peter parker

- wanda maximoff

- pietro maximoff*

- tony stark

- natasha romanoff

- k'uk'ulkan*

- killmonger*

- miguel o’hara*

MID90S

- ray*

- fuckshit

- fourth grade*

- ruben (no smut)

- stevie (no smut)

MY BABYSITTERS A VAMPIRE

- jesse white

- sarah fox

- ethan morgan

- benny weir*

- rory keener

- erica jones

NARUTO

- naruto uzumaki

- sasuke uchiha*

- sakura haruno

- minato namikaze

- hinata hyuga

- neji hyuga

- itachi uchiha*

- shisui uchiha*

- kakashi hatake*

- haku yuki

- pain*

- konan

- sasori

- deidara

RED DEAD REDEMPTION 2

- arthur morgan*

- sadie adler

- dutch van der lide

- mary linton*

- john marston

- lenny summers

- javier escuella

- mary-beth gaskill

SCREAM

- ethan landry*

- billy loomis

- stu macher

- sydney prescott

- tatum riley

STARDEW VALLEY

- alex*

- harvey

- haley*

- sam

- abigail

- emily

- shane

- sebastian

- elliott

- maru

- penny

- leah

STAR WARS

- din djarin*

- anakin skywalker*

- padme amidala*

- poe dameron

- luke skywalker

- leia skywalker

- ahsoka tano*

- han solo

- bo katan kreze

THE MIGHTY DUCKS

- charlie conway*

- adam banks*

- guy germaine

- dean portman

- julie gaffney

- connie moreau

- luis mendoza

THE SUMMER I TURNED PRETTY

- conrad fisher*

- steven conklin*

- jeremiah fisher

- belly conklin*

- taylor jewel

TWILIGHT

- alice cullen

- jasper hale*

- rosalie hale

- edward cullen

- jacob black*

- paul lahote

- leah clearwater

- seth clearwater*

- bella swan

- alec volturi*

- jane volturi

- victoria

[lucy-shining-star]

So I was wondering about epsidoes chronology and asked on discord and it seems it's like this:

Edit: First version of this post had something weird going on in season 2 section, copied something weird I guess, fixed it

Season 1

1.Elena and the secret of Avalor  except scenes with Naomi

2. First day of rule

Somewhere after First Day of Rule scenes with Naomi from Secret of Avalor

3.Model sister

4.All heated up

5.Island of youth

6.Spellbound

7.Prince too charming

8.Finders leapers

9.Royal retreat

10. A day to remember

11. The scepter of light

12. Navidad

13. Olaball

14. Flight of the jacquins

15. Crystal in the Rough

16. The princess Knight

17.Captain Turner returns

18.King of the carnaval

19, My fair Naomi

20. Spirit monkey business

21. Wizard in training

22.The Gecko's tale

23. Party of a lifetime

24. Blockheads

25. Masks of magic

26. Realm of jaquins 

Season 2: 1.The jewel of Maru

Somewhere after this and probably before 'Rise of the Sorceress'  'Scepter training with Zuzo' : 'Royal treasury escape room', 'The heist' 'Nothing but blaze', 'Don't be our guest' 'Stowaway' 

2.Royal rivarly 3.The curse of El guapo 4.Three jacquins and the princess

Somewhen after this and before 'Rise of the Sorceress', 'Adventures in Vallastrella': 'Flight of the buttefrog', 'Sleeping sunbird',  'Fast food' , 'Peabunny boogie', 'Human nature'   

5.A spy in the palace

6.Science unfair 7.Rise of the sorceress 8.Shapeshifters 9.The scepter of night

10.The race of the realm 

11.The tale of two scepters

12. Class act

13. All kingdoms fair

14. A lava story

15. Song of the sirenas 

16. The tides of change

After this and before 'Two left fins' , 'The secret life of Sirenas' : 'Feeling clammy', 'Walk this way', 'Off the races', 'Marissa and the mirror'', 'One octopus band' ,

17. Finding Zuzo

18. Two left fins

19. The Return of El Capitan

20. Snow place like home

21. Movin on up

22. Not without my magic

23. Luna's big leap

24. Naomi knows best

Season 3

1. Sister of invention

2. To save a sunbird

3. Father-in-chief

4. The incredible shrinking royals

5. Norberg Peace Prize

6. The magic within 

Somewhere after and before 'Dreamcatcher' , 'Discovering the magic within': 'When the royal family is away', 'Spirit cleaning' , 'Not so basic training', 'No good deed goes unpunished', 'Modern royal family' 

7. Captain Mateo

8.. Sugar rush

9. The family treasure

10. Dreamcatcher

11. Changing of the guard

12. King Skylar

13. Flower of light

14. Spirit of a Wizard

15. Team Isa

16. The last laugh

17. Festival of lights

18. The birthday cruise

19. Giant steps

20. Shooting stars

21. Crash course

22. Sweethearts day

23. The Lighthing warrior

24. Dia de las Madres

25. Heart of the jaguar

26. Elena's day off

27. To queen or not to queen

28. Coronation day

[dittomander]

I love your birthday posts on the EOA characters. I know Isabel was born in August and you’ve mentioned that Elena has a summer birthday too. On Twitter, I asked Craig Gerber about the age difference between Elena and Isabel. According to him, Elena and Isabel are roughly 5 years apart, give or take a few months. If that’s the case, wouldn’t Elena’s birthday month be further away from Isabel’s?

Thank you! I'm glad you like them.

Re: Craig - uh, he's just flat out incorrect. They're 6 years apart. Elena announces that she's 17 in "Jewel of Maru", and Isabel says that she's 11 years, 3 months, and 2 days old in "Three Jaquins and a Princess" just three episodes later.

Even if we throw out any other clues for their birth dates, look just at those two lines, and assume:

that Elena is as young as she could possibly be for her statement to be true (i.e., she turned 17 that morning)

that Isabel is as old as she could possibly be for her statement to be true (i.e., 3JP happens as early in the show as it possibly can)

...then the minimum possible age gap between the two is 5 years, 9 months, and 3 days, which I'd argue is way closer to 6 years, give or take a few months, not 5. In terms of calendar years, they'd be 6 years apart. To show my work:

"Jewel of Maru" takes place on November 2nd, Día de los Muertos.

"The Curse of El Guapo", one of the episodes between JoM and 3JP, explicitly spans 3 days - Gabe gets the sword and doesn't deliver it (day 1), Mendoza thanks him for delivering the sword "yesterday" and Gabe goes to Mateo for help (day 2), Mateo gives Gabe the reversal potion and says it "took [him] all night" (day 3).

Guapo plus "Royal Rivalry" plus 3JP starting on a new morning (it opens at breakfast) means that the earliest 3JP can take place is 5 days after JoM, or November 7th.

3 months and 2 days before November 7th is August 5th.

Plugging November 2nd, 17 years ago (2006) and August 5th, 11 years ago (2012) into this calculator gives me the above gap.

And again, that's assuming the absolute minimum gap. We can be pretty sure Elena's birthday is in the summer (the show starts during Sofia's summer vacation and ends roughly 4 years later, so presumably summer as well. If nothing else, we know it ends after Mother's Day and presumably before the next Día de los Muertos), which makes the gap even larger. If we use Craig Gerber's own words that Elena is a Leo (technically not 'canon' either, but has at least as much merit as any of his other tweets), then the latest her birthday could possibly be is August 23rd, and using that in the calculator above with August 5th still as Isa's birthday, the gap we get is 5 years, 11 months, 13 days.

(And frankly, we can probably assume Isa's birthday is at least a little later, too. I highly doubt "Royal Rivalry" takes place over the course of one day - they have to send word to Paraíso and wait for Val to arrive, and it's not like they have cellphones or trains.)

So, uh, yeah. They're 6 years apart, roughly. I'm assuming Craig either misspoke, miscounted, or misremembered. He is still, after all, just one guy.

[notmoreflippingelves]

Eoa 5, 6, 9, 16, 24?

5. 3 favourite characters?

Esteban, Elena, Naomi. (Though it's a very close call between Naomi and Valentina ngl and sometimes, Elena annoys me a little and gets bumped down a place or two).

6. Least favourite character?

Shuriki in the sense that she's the one who personally evokes the most angry feelings in me. But I also thinks she's a particularly good and effective villain and a very effective means of creating high stakes and woobifying Esteban further, so she can stay in my book.

I also really dislike Cristobal Castillo a fair bit for obvious reasons, but I think he also works fairly effectively in the context of the show as both a temporary baddie and as foil to Esteban (even if I wish we could've seen them interact more).

I think Fiero and Zopilote are both really interesting conceptually but were largely wasted in the show itself. Maybe they would've worked better if they were combined into a single character. Ash's evil mentor who serves as a foil to her and to Mateo, allies temporarily with Shuriki for POWAH (but always plans to betray her) in S2 and is both very proud of and very demanding of Ash. But in their current incarnation, they're just kind of there and largely pointless to me.

In terms of characters who weren't specifically designed to be villains, I am not particularly fond of Flo, Charoca, Luisa, or Mateo. I wouldn't say I "hate" them exactly as all do have some moments that I enjoy and have a role to play in the story. But even at their very best, I am decidedly "meh" about them compared to the others. Particularly Mateo. (I recently made a post about what I see as pretty clear writer's bias/favoritism toward him and why it aggravates me).

9. Favourite season and why?

It's difficult to say, since I think each of the seasons have their own particular strengths and weaknesses.

S1 is most consistent on an episode-by-episode level. At this point, the show is mostly filler/world-building but its much less glaring and disruptive here than in the later seasons. Also "Island of Youth" and "King of the Carnaval" have my whole heart.

S2 is best at pacing and balancing filler with the main plot. Shuriki is also by far the best villain on the show, and while there's still a lot of missed opportunities with that (which I'll get into at the next question), her return and defeat are handled reasonably well. I also feel that S2 has the best Dia de los Muertos episode (" The Jewel of Maru") and the best holiday episode ("Snow Place Like Home"). That being said, S2 is particularly aggravating to me as an Estefan since he does pretty much nothing of substance for an entire season--with the exception of an (admittedly great) cousin rap battle and a bit of (shared) focus in the Navidad episode.

S3 is probably my favorite and there is so much to love about it. the show finally gives Esteban the characterization and plot focus that he has deserved all along--and as a bonus, they gave him magic powers, a (reluctant and fortunately temporary) villain era, a redemption arc, a sparkly magical outfit( that pairs with Elena's) and an extremely stupid new hairdo to boot. I also love love love Elena's emotional magic (particularly as a parallel with Esteban's teleportation and just the aesthetic of her dress changing colors with her mood). I also love Victor and Carla redemption (even if I wish we could've seen more of them). In S3, we were introduced to Chloe, Antonia, Ixlan, and Rebecca who are some of my faves of the supporting characters. I love everything about "Dreamcatcher" and most of "The Magic Within" (except for Flo and the mood whiplash she brings with her) and "Coronation Day" as well.

But for all that is great about S3, there are some notable flaws as well. The most obvious of which is pacing. (Granted that this is probably unintentional and a lot of the problems are due to Disney airing things wildly out of order). We will go from some of the most devastating and emotionally exhausting episodes on the show to just super low-key filler episodes without any preamble and it's so frustrating. That being said, S2 did a much better job integrating the main plot even into filler episodes. (Ex: There was a little bit Victor and Carla shenanigans in "Royal Rivalry" and a few scenes of "Carla-as-Rita" even in the mostly filler science fair ep). It's also wildly funny to me how we will go through multiple S3 episodes without Esteban appearing or even being mentioned, yet the moment he does show up--either in person or conversation--he is accompanied by the affirmation that Elena is 110% incapable of being normal about him. It's like he either doesn't exist at all to her OR he is one of the only things that exists to her. There is absolutely no middle ground. It's hilarious.

I also have mixed feelings about Ash, Chatana, and the Four Shades of Awesome as villains. Chatana in particular seems underdeveloped and underused. While I mostly like Cahu as the final Big Bad, the other Shades seems kind of random and out of place, and I also think Cahu should've been introduced an episode or two earlier. Even if she doesn't appear, we could've learned that summoning her was Ash's plan and what she expects to accomplish. As well as the stakes of what they are risking by doing so.

16. Most ridiculous plot line?

The absolute nonsensical timeline/episode airing order throughout the whole show but especially in S3. Honestly, ridiculous is not at all the right word, but the plot arc--or at least plot element--that I find most aggravating is Esteban's plot during the S2 "Shuriki Returns" arc. Or more specifically, the complete and utter lack of Esteban plot during said arc. More than anyone else on the show except possibly Elena (and even that is debatable), Esteban's entire character has been shaped by 41 years of Shuriki's reign, coupled by his own guilt for enabling that reign in the first place and his lingering fear and trauma from the Dark Times in general.

As such the Shuriki returns arc should've been nearly as crucial to his character development as it was to Elena's. And yet...all we get is "The Right Thing to Do" and a few tiny little moments in "Song of the Sirenas" (him hiding behind Francisco on seeing Shuriki again and wanting to be rescued first from the tower). That's it. Three little moments, two of which are specifically played for laughs and all of which only really contribute to Esteban's character development if you really stop and think about them beyond the surface level.

Esteban uses his body as a shield multiple times to protect Elena from Ash (and later Cahu) in S3 and yet, he sees Shuriki and he immediately darts behind his grandfather for protection like a scared child. He literally does a song and dance to try to persuade (and then force) Elena to stay as far away from Shuriki as possible. He jumps the line to try be the first to be rescued from Shuriki and then his second thought is to protect the youngest and most vulnerable person in the room (Isabel) instead of himself. It's almost (sarcasm) as it he knows better than anyone exactly what truly horrendous things that Shuriki is capable of and wants to protect himself and his family from them.

I mean, I understand that the nature of this being a children's show discourages them from delving too much into Esteban's trauma and what exactly the Dark Times looked like. If they reminded the eight year olds watching that 41 years is an insanely long period of time to live alone without family, friends, or freedom, they would probably get so many angry letters from parents. Yet in the very first episode of the show, they just low-key reveal that Shuriki enslaved the noblins .

I don't think it would've been too much to have Esteban be like "Remember the noblins. Remember your parents. Remember the amulet. These are only a few examples of the terrible things Shuriki has done . I've seen them all firsthand and I've seen countless more equally nightmarish so I will not let you go after her now" before he breaks into his Hamilton audition piece.

Or even just there be a brief moment during the "Shuriki Returns" arc where someone is like "How are you holding up, Esteban? This must be so scary and stressful for you too/ you in particular." But no, this was apparently too much to ask for.

24. Favourite song from the show?

My favorite songs from the show are always the random ones with guest characters as opposed to the actually plot-important ones with main characters, lol. So my top 5 would probably be: "You Can't Catch Me," "A Little Bit More," (Val, my beloved) "More, More, More" (which is probably the most underrated song on the show imo), "You Want to Live Forever," and "The Gift of Night" and probably in that order.

If you held a gun to my head and told me I had to pick a more important song that is song by a series regular, it would probably be either "Something I Would Never Do" or "Let Love Light the Way."

Ask Meme

[camelottree638]

Elena/Mateo - Chimalma/Tonauac - We've Been Here Before (Maru crossover)

I am aware that in the canon of Maya and the Three Maya and Rico are explicitely soul-siblings, not lovers and that the Maruvians vanished completely when the Shadows attacked. This is my interpretation of a mix of Maruvian and Tecca lore to use characters from Maya and the Three as Maruvian OCs. The project was also heavily inspired by @cartoonfangirl1218 ‘s Soul Mate AU with my own spin on the characters. (https://www.tumblr.com/cartoonfangirl1218/181332057972/eoa-doppelg%C3%A4nger-idea ;https://www.tumblr.com/cartoonfangirl1218/708260886287122432/soul-mates)

PLOT:

Just as Elena and Mateo, the Maruvian Queen Chimalma („shield bearer“)  was also married to her Royal Wizard Tonauac (meaning „one who possesses light“ because oft he light of his magic and ironic for his history with the Scepter of Night). Tonauac manipulated Chimalma (who was a warrior and insecure in her role as political leader) into freeing the Shades of Darkness.

Afraid that he could unintentionally give Elena bad advice as well when his ambitions for magical knowledge get too great, Mateo tries to find out all he can about his predecessor to avoid his mistakes. During his research Mateo discovers the truth: Tonauac did indeed betray his wife but he was corrupted by the Scepter of Night. Only the love for each other and their twins was enough to break the magic bonds oft he Maruvian Queen and Wizard.

Elena meanwhile, worries about being a good ruler and while her insecurities and fiery temper are not as big as Chimalma’s, she starts to worry about being able to rule on her own.

Just as both Mateo and Elena doubt themselves, the Shades reappear to finish the destruction of Maru they started centuries ago. With much effort  they can hold the darkness at bay together. And as it has been in their previous lives, love ist he answer. Their kiss is interrupted by sudden flashbacks and the true story comes to light.

Chimalma’s magical sword was also known as the Jewel of Maru. To at least save her husband and children, the Queen sacrificed herself, sending the Shades back tot he Spirit World. She was able to save her children and husband, but most oft he population died in the blast and the kingdom of Maru would never recover it’s full power.

The twins Guatemoc and Tecuani stay close to each other and are the founders of different families: Guatemoc’s descendents form the Castillo line while Tecuani’s family line leads to Mateo’s birth 900 years later.

Both the reincarnation of their love in a previous life and the twin connection of their respective ancestors contribute to Elena and Mateo’s strong bond but Elena refuses to just be a part of predetermined destiny. They may have met before but the experiences of this life are their own.

The circle finally comes to a close as their children Anita and Carlos end up Avalor ruling together, fulfilling the rule over a kingdom the twins had been denied. Thus, they break the circle of destiny and rebirth and everyone is free to have their own life once and for all.

[locitapurplepink]

Crown Princess Elena on "The Jewel of Maru" Part 1

[primalvessel]

@adenial

It was known as the jewel of the desert - the city that shone with the sum of its wealth.

Even that didn't compare the sight before him though.

The red silk of the bedspread in Uldah's finest room only made the pale skin of the Viera's slender body all the more eyecatching and of course Maru couldn't help but take in the view. The way her hair spread around her like a halo. The long lines uninterrupted by even a stitch of clothing.

Much as he didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable, he couldn't help but drink it in. She was more beautiful than anything the riches of Uldah had to offer.

Only once he'd had his fill of the delectable sight she presented did he finally step closer, shedding his clothes as he went, to join her upon the silk sheets.

[elena-of-avalor-polls]

The Jewel of Maru - On the Day of the Dead, Elena tries to keep Victor and Carla from stealing a powerful Maruvian jewel.

Rise of the Sorceress - Elena comes face-to-face with Shuriki in a magical battle and the evil wizard, Fiero, returns to join Shuriki on her quest to retake control over Avalor.

[ugh-yoongi]

jewel, who have you married in stardew valley? and who's the best?

in my first game i married elliott and divorced him for emily 🥲

in my current game i’m only at the end of year 1 but sebastian is my bf and i just upgraded my house so will probably get married in fall or whenever i get the hardwood for the second house upgrade so i can get his frog room 🤠 on god my emo king we are gonna get you out of that house before next winter. demetrius will NOT destroy another one of year snowgoons on my watch

i just go w whoever i like at the time but for actual gameplay mechanics apparently maru gives the best items??

[greedyapron]

17/9/2023 - Dinner

PIZZA MARU, Jewel Changi

Seafood carbonara

Some chili padi's. Very gao but so good! Probably best shared.

Sweet Potato Pizza

Good choice for this upgrade. The sweet potato was yums.

Chicago Pizza

FILLED with cheese. It was cheese with pizza, not the other way round.

Garlic Wings

The sauce is ADDICTIVE!! (all their sauces are).

Coucou's da hong pao milk tea with coconut pudding

Pudding was alright. Tea was stronger than I last had it.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CxfHJe6v3xrDaZP93tVhtISz9fN2vJhIf9dLvM0/?igshid=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==

[usagisbanexd]

+ SUPER SOLDIER SAILOR STARS #10 * _) _) >>C===3 :-* Kawaii Slash Lovers Collide Cosmic Paradise // Sailormoon/Pokémon/Potterverse Altfic Crossover, CHAPTER 1.0.010

1.0.010 MOTOKI SHOPS FOR A NEW GIRL, GUESS MONSTER OF THE WEEK ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM </3

Motoki got his eyes crossed thinking about a muse. He thinks he’s going to be stupid. He thinks he’s got the right. He thinks she’s no good at moving. She thinks with her heart and never wants woman wise. She has a hard time knowing what to think about herself. She wants to die all the time. No, that’s the only one. He wants her to take her panties off, and doesn’t know why we waste our time writing with wax. They only have six days before the planet ends. We all want it to happen, we all want those little girls to stop dancing, all of Nipon hangs in the balance, all Indian magic was wrong. We haven’t even said goodbye to yesterday. Yeah, yesteryear. He never will. Don't get your hopes up, Ami-chan. Love will come to you like a too-tight fuku and rip your legs asunder. Kawaii, frownyface, love thunders on. Mako knows how to water a flower, Ami-chan, your mist is toxic force, Farfetch'd in the pigpen. Stop trying. Bleep, goes Ami's visor, and all the world inside her perverted eye. Itching to touch herself, itching to husk. Throbbing. Made male. Pale-mooned. Sleep-soaked. Refrigerator, open! Refrigerator, hit Ami in the fucking forehead! The boy is GANY'S, baby.

            “We can do this, Motoki Kamen,” says Sailorchibiganymede, appearing at his dashboard with her legs splayed, rubbing a rose against her labia. “We can kill the evil Sailorjupiter and collect his starseed! Bane of all the gods, he wanders heaven thinking he’s the greatest, but we know in his heart of hearts, he’s womb-born. Womb-born like woman, womb-born like that bitch Hotaru trapped down the cellar with a rope and two pairs of binoculars. I can bleed for you if you’re getting bored. I can see your incision. Do brains proffer explanation? Tickle me with a rose!”

            “Slow down,” says Motoki. “You’re too good for me. I’ve unleashed you and now I need to play catch-up. I need to go back to my la and fink phu. You’re too good to write better. You know it’s ‘baby.’ Baby, think for me, I’ll think for you.”

            “I think eternal stars,” says Fuku, turning around and showing her twat from a different angle. She knows he’s dancing all the way to the bank, tank on empty, does she know how to read a speedometer? What’s a speedometer?  Where’s the gas gauge? Sailorhotstudofmercury, fix my car!! I “love you,” Moto-chan. For Mako she sheds a tear, tissue from the stoli of her eye. Does her puss look good from this angle? He’s going to puke. I’ll resuscitate him. IRONS! NURSE, I SAID IRONS!

            “Slow down,” he says cooly to the mirror. “Slow.” She thinks he lives to breathe, but actually he thinks to live unencumbered. He’s a mystery, a divine one, and soon in her pussy she’ll clutch his jewel like the empress clam obtaining the pearl from the hand of God! And all the riches will be hers, and the plumber lives, and we’re glad he’s talking about this, and he works at an arcade, and that’s all right by me, I’ll fuck Mario later, I’ll fuck Mario good, but first I get this boy out of my head until he soils my fuku. Soil is the wrong word, operative shit, operative esther, operative sing-along, stat! I have two babies, two whole babies from my womb, and still a sealed hymen like a curse on women. Am I thinking too slow? Strike the mirror, check.

            I want to know when you’ll be okay. If you’re having a problem reading this, you’re not. Everybody belongs to the Empreors. Everybody is imp-bound. Every fossil uncovered des deez nutang Asia Palace pseudonym harukami. Knifeblade Maru-chan, every beautiful word taken by breasted female, and you and I alone my Moki-chan to harbor against a rock and cling to villages in fantasy where women go to war. Why am I alone in this? Women go to war. Baby, relax, I’m thinking slowly. He tells the whole thing to his head and feels it wash away.

            Moki at the throne of an Impala. Moki driving, staff assisted. Moki at the arcade. Moki fielding deadly cinema, Mokley with a gun in hand. Do we know why Mokley knows Mokley? Can we tell? Does Matoko know that God is watching? And dear Makoto, dead on the floor, time out of time predatress kneeling by her wingside, thinking she’s her mistress, that’s okay – THAT’S NOT OKAAY. BABY, THAT’S NOT OKAY. SAY MATOKI. I’LL REASON WITH TIME ON BEHALF OF MOON FLYING TOWARD FAVOR IN THE MILKY WAY. WHERE ARE WE? YOU KNOW, SO TELL ME.

            Makoto lies alone. Mako has his girl. Ami-chan sleeps with a knife in her pocket, knowing the wisdom through which she sees the world is nothing but an empty doom torn outside like a glove into heaven. And I burst. And I’m done. And I tried to help but I’m Ami and I’m evil. And I’ll never take the visor off. And I’ll never be a real girl. And I love Matoki, big and small, but all people are the same and some have similar names, and you’ll never achieve lift-off typing like that, Ami-chan, so type short sentences and I’ll assist you by buying you a Macintosh. A brand new Macintosh?! Mommy, you shouldn’t have! And Sailortrannyjupito sings songs about Kreyayshawn, white-nosed, presagething a flood, never getting her due, bleeding semina somewhere in the backseat of a rideshare, counting her million. Sailorchibiganymede lives past and present, but Moto is so tired and so ashamed. Do I flash him the beatstick? The lips? The beautiful pink wonderland betwixt that ugly bone at the bereft of my thigh? I worked hard for that bone; I stole it from the corpse of Zeus descended. Teehee, he had thought to misremember his iniquity, but all fingers point to troubled Ganymede. My beloved soldiers me through fields toward the great pink and gold city planet in the sky, untouched by man, throwing up illusions, a nom casino flung like coins like rainwater out of buckets all across the streets, Ami cannot reach it, if Ami dares to go, she dies, and fair-faced Ganymede, the never morninged raver, is the city liberated from Yahweh’s twisted curses. Sailorgamorrah ascended, Sailorgamorrah my mother, Sailorgamorrah perfect star, live to rise again!

            “Come to Ganymede, Moto, baby,” sings Sailorchibiganymede, making air traffic controller acrobatics with her arms, legs doing nothing but holding the wheel where his hands are. His hands on her legs. Her legs. She’s never been a rose. Ami has pricked herself. Ami has died. Ami is monster of the week, moss-headed, mudded, entangled. Ami’s next. “TURN RIGHT! KILL MAKO-CHAN! FOREVER BLOSSOM! NINETY FOUR SISTERS, AWAKEN!”

            Mako thinks. Mako wants to know. Mako believes Ami doesn’t know what she’s talking about, but Sailorunderprivilegeddtennesseangirl sleeps with her head tucked to her cleavage and her ugly dagger’s chin alert for plunging, plunging medal modesty into the hearts of miscellaneous penised people, the golden nymphs beyond her reason blooming outward from her head like a greater beauty seeking a greater light, leaving her eyes, leaving her ears, leaving her hair behind. And Sailorhermaphroditus her bastard child lives like a leaf, losing little, losing limpids, crawling through nature, unwinding, out of time, never afeared, always becoming greater through the metric of building, and that’s her partition, and Ganymede holds her at the tip of her womb, her whole body’s her womb, but a little star pix brightly shining collapses into everything at the basketball’s spinning point upon her fingertip, and Ganymede holds all the cards, what ugliness does Ami harbor, what black blood in a trash can, a weapon, Eve’s curse, Gany pukes. Gany doesn’t care. Gany is man-born, stolen to heaven by Jupiter. Last night he did remember. In the secret trove of his apartment he the only man reigns and rains, see how it is? Rains and reigns over ninety four flowers, all of them women, and never leaves. Kill him with us, Ami-chan, his evil knows no bounds. Don’t you see how all this comes to be?

            “Who are you talking to, Mako?”

            “I am Sailorganymede, mother of the orphan tree! Fear not my name which settles thee upon the branch of inconvee! Teehee, wheehee, ouioui.”

            “Baby, you offered Mercury a spot,” says Motoki.

            “Honey, I called to her through time. Her evil womb encases you for fear of manly women. I spoke to my father the sun this day and he told me to sacrifice you like Isaac upon the mountain, the iron-barked mountain, Ami threatens me, she ties my tongue, she knows no God, she is computer-born. Avaunt! I said ‘Soon, I die!’ Why bring that on? I thought you loved me, grew this vagina for you, plucked me from my garden in Jupiter’s thigh and gave myself to a vestige of you iron-born. Get this silly haggot from me hence! Or soon I embark upon a war of recompense! Peace sign! Kawaii! Teehee! Dark Kool Aid Prism Power, Poverty Make-Up!”

            “I am a spirit,” says Ami.

            “Then speak bravely of where you are.”

            “I am in chains,” she says.

            “A simulation, as you have ever been. You gave your heart to Galaxia, baby, you did it to drink beer. Figure that out for yourself and we’ll find ourselves a man through the mask of your personage. We are all, we drink the earth and sun and dawn and moon and sky and ground and eternity of sex and love! Sex and love! Moon-chan, that’s something to fight for. Does she hear me from beyond the grave? I tire of never talking. Ami, call his phone.”

            “No,” he says.

            “Okay, but I’m a dead girl in a flower astral projecting myself on his dashboard. What’s a poor lass to do but roll over and die? YOUR WORDS, AMI. WHY? WHY? WHY? CRY. CRY, FLY, OR DIE. BUT NOT THROUGH MY TONGUE WILL I EVER LET YOU LIE.”

            “I’m poor,” says Ami. “And grave.”

            “Since Moon has died, my dear friend Ami, who has played the knave?”

            “You can do this all day,” says Ami, firing a missile hence. “But no one will read it. It’s too grave.”

            “There are starseeds thrown to good earth waiting to blossom, penised flowers in the garden of a goddess greater than your understanding, Ami P, who shall take up all mantles like fair Atlas the rippling assus and give to the earth a bounty of young Romuli incarnate eternum? Don’t shackle me and do NOT conspire! Rupaul watches you from a future vantage, A batch of young is your doing, Ami P, your future, and you curse yourself in so choosing. I shall have infinite children. The sun is in my throat and her song is fecundity. Soon. . . I DIE! AVAUNT!!”

            “Hold on,” says Motoki, fixing the rear view. “I’m almost there.”

            “Who sleeps waiting for the phallus?” says Chibiganymede, her eyes three crystals torn from tsundere, stepped on, trampled on, stomped on, STOMP. Tsundere break. Tsundere build. Tsundere crash. “Await me, God! Baseball Jersey Kamen, I come!”