#the idea of him arguing with a baby is so funny actually

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

Skeleton's adult children said they couldn't come for Christmas this year, but shows up as a surprise to celebrate with him and S/O (who was warned about it for the food lol). For the main boys!

Undertale Sans - Sans was slightly down about not seeing his kids this year. Family is everything for him and he was just sad he couldn't celebrate with the people he loves the most. He's genuinely shocked and confused when he opens the door and finds his two kids waiting. That's the best surprise ever. He really doesn't care about the presents, that's a present big enough for him already. He's cheerful all night.

Undertale Papyrus - He found it oddly suspicious you cooked so much honestly and he had a feeling something like that was about to happen. That or you wanted to stuff Sans like a Christmas turkey or something, he wasn't too sure. Papyrus is excited about his kids showing up and acts like he didn't expect it at all with a bit too much passion.

Underswap Sans - Well, he's on service on Christmas day anyway so he didn't have time to process his S/O would be alone on Christmas. He's surprised to see both his S/O and his kids come to fetch him by force so he spends Christmas with them. His boss was already aware. He is happy to have a day off, but it also means he needs to go through a family dinner and he's not too excited about it.

Underswap Papyrus - Being the original Mr. Dad, Honey was devastated to not have his babies home for Christmas, and even quite depressed, even though he was happy to celebrate with his S/O. He's crying on his knees when he opens the door and finds all of his children here. He's so happy he faints actually. When he wakes up, he has no idea what's going on, he's just happy.

Underfell Sans - He understands. His children are big and they have their lives now. Just like Edge, they don't have any more time for little old him. He was kinda resigned to his fate until he opens the door and finds them all here, both his children and his brother. Uh??? Red says they shouldn't have come and everything, but he can't hide for long he is actually a tiny bit relieved they didn't forget about him. It seems he didn't mess up educating them all after all. That's a little bit comforting.

Underfell Papyrus - He was fine with the idea as he would have seen them all on New Year anyway. He didn't understand why his S/O insisted on cooking so much food and he started to argue when someone rang at the door. Ah. So that's why. Ah, ah, very funny. You think you are all so clever, right? He's pouting, and he won't give the kids their presents before the next day just to show he's mad lol. He's stubborn, and you won't convince him to say he's actually happy to see them.

Horrortale Sans - .... Were you not supposed to come? He doesn't know, he kinda forgot. Oak just assumed they were coming and set the table for them anyway, so everyone thought he knew already. He didn't. Or, well, he did, but unwillingly. He's just happy his kids are here.

Horrortale Papyrus - He knew that it could happen so he set the table for his children anyway. Willow doesn't like to be unprepared in case something unexpected happens, so he did like the kids were coming anyway. And look at that, he knew he was right! Willow is happy he cooks for 200 people (even though you're just eight, help), no one is going to starve tonight. You're all going to be dying in bed the next day so you can't leave, which is also part of his plan to keep you longer at home. Next time, you'll think about visiting more often.

Swapfell Sans - Nox was secretly hoping for it the second he saw his S/O cook way more food than they could eat in one night. He's kinda waiting all day at the window like a sad puppy, or running to the window every time there's a loud car in the street. Of course, when his S/O stares at him, he immediately acts like he's bitching on the neighbors like usual, he has a reputation after all. He even falls asleep waiting for them at some point. When his baby comes, he's so excited that you're pretty sure you've never seen him like that in your entire life. Nox feels like it's not really Christmas as long as everyone is not home.

Swapfell Papyrus - He asks his child to prove him they're not an evil clone of his child. And he won't move off the way before you do. You come here uninvited, and he's going to troll you to make you pay after making him believe you were not coming. He eventually lets them in after they tell a joke that actually makes him laugh. He's just happy his kid is home.

Fellswap Gold Sans - He calls his S/O delusional and in denial all day, and now he's shutting up for good. He's even a little mad that they actually showed up and made him look like an idiot. How dare you do that to your old father? Now he has to apologize and he hates to apologize! Go apologize to your other parent for him this instant!

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - He's a little disappointed and resigned to only cuddle with S/O tonight when the kids show up out of nowhere. Coffee is speechless. And not prepared??? Why didn't you say you were coming? He's not ready! All the gifts are in his room! He's panicking now. You said they were not coming, now nothing is ready and everything is wrong. Christmas is stressful man!

[obsesssedblerd]

“Wahhh!” 

“Nooooo!” 

“Bwahhhhhh!” 

“I don’t care, she was mine first!!!” 

“WAHHH!” 

“AHHHHHHH-” 

“Satoru Gojo,” you snap and glare at your husband, who’s burying his face in the pillow to muffle his laughter. Your seven month-old son also begins laughing. It’s so cute that you almost forget that the two were screaming at each other just seconds ago. 

Satoru lifts his head up to grin handsomely at you, feigning innocence. “Yes, wifey?” 

“Why on earth are you screaming with your son at eight o’clock in the morning?” You ask. 

“Because,” he whines, pointing an accusing finger at your baby boy, who had begun cooing adorably for your attention. “He won’t let me kiss you! Watch what happens.” To demonstrate, Satoru gently leans in, only to be stopped when the baby uses his tiny hands to push against his face with a loud whine. You stifle a laugh when he pouts, squinting his eyes at your son. “Listen, just because you’re laying here, doesn’t mean that you can just keep me from giving my wife a little smooch.” 

Your son doesn’t budge. “Bwah!” 

“Okay, and?!” Satoru exclaims with a tilt of his head.

You roll your eyes. “I cannot believe you’re actually arguing with him.” 

“Kid’s got a mouth on him.” 

“How do you even know what he said– You know what? Don’t answer that. Anyway, he’s your kid. I’d be surprised if he wasn’t sassy.” 

Satoru gasps dramatically. “I am not sassy.” Next to him, your son matches his pout with a hmph, and since he was born with Satoru’s hair and eye color, he basically looked like a tiny version of him. “See?” He asks, gesturing to his mini. “Even he agrees with me!” 

“Sure he does,” you say, then turn your attention back to your phone, scrolling through a grocery delivery app so you can start ordering things for the week 

“And back to you,” you hear Satoru continue with your son, “I just want to kiss her cheek, and you’re just– hey, no sticking out your tongue at me.” The baby babbles, and Satoru scoffs. “No, I’m not cryin’. What’re you talking about?” 

You laugh quietly. If this was how it was now, you couldn’t wait to see what it’s going to be like in the future.

[starryjake]

medicine | s.j

in which jake is sick and the only thing that will make him feel better is a taste of you.

pairing: jake x fem!reader

includes: face sitting, oral sex, jake being sick, squirting, cumming untouched, cumming in pants, face riding (lmk if i missed anything).

jake was game to eat you out at any time.

you’re exhausted after a long day of work or classes? jake was there already kneeling in front of the bed, awaiting your pussy.

it’s the middle of the night and you’re tucked into bed, fast asleep? jake can’t help the craving he gets and just has to have one lick of your addictive taste before he’s able to fall asleep.

you step foot out of the shower and within less than a minute, jake is laying you down in the tub and devouring your pussy.

the point was, it didn’t matter the occasion. jake just always wanted to eat you out.

that was never anything you felt the need to complain about. you knew people who’s boyfriends refused to go down on them and you couldn’t believe it. you and your boyfriend had just about the opposite of that problem.

but since jake was always game, that meant he wanted it even when he was in not-so-great situations himself.

“no, jake,” you said assertively, shaking your head.

“please,” he begged, looking at you with those pleasing puppy-dog eyes.

at any other given time, you would’ve said yes. just like jake always wanted to eat you out, you always wanted to get eaten out. you two were a match made in heaven.

however, jake had picked up some virus going around campus and had been completely knocked out by it. he’d spent the past two days in bed sleeping, trying to rid his body of the sickness.

you’d been his faithful nurse, staying close by in case he needed anything. you made him soup, brought him medicine every few hours, monitored his temperature, and gave him everything else he could’ve possibly needed. except, that is, the one thing he actually wanted.

“why not?” he practically whimpered. “it’s been days. i deserve it. i’ll feel so much better.”

his desperation almost made you laugh. he wanted you so badly and if he wasn’t as sick as he was, you would’ve given it to him, but he just wasn’t well enough. he was still sniffly, still weak, still running a fever, and just simply was not in the right position to be giving you head.

“you deserve it?” you couldn’t hold back the laugh this time.

“i do!” he whined, not finding the situation funny whatsoever. “i’ve been stuck in this bed for days feeling like shit and all i want is to have my face buried between your legs. just a taste, baby, please.”

you shook your head.

“just a taste is gonna turn into you eating me out for hours,” you said.

“and what’s wrong with that?” he pouted.

“you need to be sleeping and getting better,” you told him.

he leaned forward in your shared bed to get closer to you, who was sitting at the foot of the bed. he placed his hand on your thigh, tilting his head to the side.

“your pussy will make me better,” he said softly.

you placed your hand on top of his, looking into his pleading eyes. he was still so handsome, even as sick as he was. you were tempted, you had to admit.

“i don’t know, jake,” you said.

“please, baby,” he begged you, practically on the verge of tears. “i’ll make you feel so good, i promise.”

his pink cheeks, his swollen lips, his teary eyes, you just couldn’t say no to him.

plus, he said it would help him feel better, so how could you argue with that?

“fine,” you gave in. “lay back.”

jake bit his lip to prevent himself from smiling in victory. his eyes lit up when you agreed and he immediately complied, lying back down on his back.

you crawled up the bed until you made it to his abdomen. you planted your knees on either side of him and hovered over his body, second guessing whether you should actually do this.

“are you sure, jake?” you sighed.

jake’s face flashed with terror at the mere idea of you changing your mind. his eyebrows furrowed together in worry.

“i’m sure,” he insisted. “please, i need it. it’s my medicine.”

for whatever reason, his words turned you on. calling your pussy his medicine was all you needed to hear to shuffle your shorts down your legs, leaving you bare and exposed to him.

he licked his lips and watched you closely as you crawled up the remainder of his body until landing by his face. you hovered above him, sighing at the sight of him underneath you.

“sit,” he urged, beyond eager to get his tongue inside you.

“stop me if you can’t breathe,” you warned, knowing his nose was stuffed and his mouth would be occupied.

he didn’t say anything, just grabbed your hips and pulled you down so you were actually sitting on his face.

a surprised moan escaped your lips as jake immediately started licking your folds, gathering all your wetness on his tongue. he moaned, muffled, but the vibrations from it were extremely pleasurable.

you dug your hand in his mop of messy hair, legs already starting to tremble as he swiped his tongue up and down the length of your pussy.

you looked down and you could just tell he was in his most happy place. his eyes were closed, savoring the sensation of licking your pussy and tasting your sweet arousal. he was almost moaning as much as you were, certainly enjoying it as much as you, if not more.

you turned your head back and weren’t surprised at all by the sight of his hips thrusting up into the air, desperate for any kind of friction. his neglected cock was straining against his pajama pants, but you knew he wasn’t expecting you to touch him. he just wanted to eat you out, and that was enough for him.

“tastes so fucking good,” he said through an exhale, taking a second to catch his breath.

“are you doing okay?” you asked him, raising yourself off his face.

“more than okay,” he assured you. “i could do this all fucking night.”

he grabbed your hips and pulled you back down onto his face, going straight for your clit this time. he wrapped his lips around the bud and sucked on it softly, swallowing your taste.

you yelped, your legs clenching around his face.

“oh fuck, jake,” you cried out, your grip tightening in his hair.

he released his suction on your clit and went back to gliding his tongue up and down your pussy. he stopped at your hole and delved his tongue inside, letting out a broken moan at your tight walls around his tongue.

you found yourself slightly grinding on his face, subconsciously trying to rub your clit against his nose while he thrusted his tongue in and out of your hole. you knew he didn’t care. in fact, he loved it. he loved you humping his face in an attempt to increase the pleasure.

you sat up again, removing your pussy from his face. a string of your arousal mixed with his spit kept your pussy connected to his lips.

he looked up at you in confusion and even a slight hint of frustration as to why you just took away his treat—your pussy.

“why?” he asked urgently.

“your forehead is so warm, jakey,” you said, having brushed against it while you were tugging his hair.

it’d brought you back down to earth, reminding you that you were riding the face of someone who was not entirely up to health.

“i’m fine,” he said, annoyed. “i feel so good, please just come back. let me have it again.”

he was so, so desperate. you knew you should get off and let him get some sleep, but he wanted it so bad. so, you lowered your hips back down to his face and allowed him to lick up your pussy lips.

“fuck, thank you,” he moaned out, relieved to have your warm pussy back on his face. “i feel good, i promise. just need your pussy on me, baby, that’s all.”

you sighed in pleasure, leaning back slightly and starting to grind again. jake closed his eyes again, lapping and slurping at your pussy.

your stomach was warm and the knot would unravel soon, you were sure of it. he was so good at eating you out, you never lasted long.

“harder,” he urged, pulling you down on his face even more. “ride my face harder, baby.”

you whimpered, humping his face harder. your puffy clit hit the tip of his nose every time you fucked your hips forward. jake fucking loved it. he loved inhaling through his nose and smelling your sweet pussy, having it right there in front of him.

he loved you sitting on his face just as much as he loved laying on his stomach and eating you out regularly. he loved when you would just lose all control and ride his face like you were riding his cock. he loved to be used.

“fuck, jake,” you sobbed out. “i’m gonna fucking cum, oh my—don’t stop, please don’t stop. fuck, i’m cumming!”

you squealed as your orgasm washed over you. your legs tightened around his face and his tongue quickened, eating your pussy through your orgasm and lapping at the excess wetness dripping out of you. you fucked his face, letting all your weight sit on him because your brain was in too much of a fog to care.

“fuck,” jake moaned against you. “you’re so fucking hot, angel. wait! don’t get up.”

he gripped your waist, stopping you from climbing off his face.

“why? you should sleep now,” you said, catching your breath from your orgasm.

he shook his head, pulling you back down.

“need more,” he mumbled, lightly circling your clit with the tip of his tongue, going gentle as to not overstimulate you.

“no, jake,” you declined, however made no attempt to stop him.

“shh,” he shushed you, disregarding your words. “please, baby. i just need a little more and then i’ll be all better, promise.”

you whimpered as he rubbed his wet tongue on your drenched folds. he wrapped his arms around your thighs, basically keeping you trapped on his face.

“jake,” you whispered, pushing some stray strands of hair out of his forehead.

“so good,” he mumbled, flattening his tongue. “ride my tongue, baby. c’mon, i know you can do it.”

you started grinding back and forth on his tongue, head falling back at the sensation. his tongue was so warm and wet and felt euphoric as he laid it out for you to use, to rub your spent pussy on.

if jake was paying attention to his own cock, he’d realize how much pain he was in. he was so, so hard, and needed to be touched desperately. but he couldn’t. he just wanted your pussy and nothing else, not even oxygen.

“fuck,” you moaned. “feels so fucking good, jake. i think i’m gonna cum a lot.”

you didn’t know what you were saying. you were so fucked out and jake was too pussy drunk and sick to comprehend your words either.

you knew what you meant, but he didn’t.

you rubbed your pussy all over his face, getting your wetness all over his nose, his cheeks, and his chin. he started licking you again, moaning nonstop.

“i’m gonna—mm, jake! i’m cumming!”

it hit you a lot faster this time, so fast that you couldn’t even give him a proper warning.

you also couldn’t warn him as a stream of wetness shoots out of you. you were squirting all over his face and that was what did it for jake. that was what had him humping his hips up into the air one more time and cumming untouched in his pants.

he moaned, feeling sweaty and lightheaded as he felt your wetness all over his face. briefly, he thought he might pass out. even feeling so weak, he still ate you out through your second orgasm, drinking all the fluid you’d just released and moaning from how delicious it was.

he hummed, babbling nonsense because he was so far gone. you pulled yourself off his face, your pussy twitching from over sensitivity.

“baby,” he mumbled.

“yeah?” you retorted.

“i came,” he told you.

you frowned, looking down at his pants and noticing the stain of cum seeping through the fabric.

“but…” you trailed off. “you weren’t even touching yourself.”

“i know,” he said. “i think i’m just…really sensitive when i’m sick. but guess what?”

“what?” you asked, already starting to pull his pants down to help clean up.

“i was right about your pussy being medicine,” he informed. “i feel completely better.”

you laugh, shaking your head in dismay.

“you’re such a weirdo.”

-

this is FILTH. what i wouldn’t give to sit on jake’s face man.

thanks for reading!

[teddybeartoji]

toji is a cat dad. the cat looks so fucking tiny next to him that it's a little comical actually. they spend every morning together �� the cat twirls around and between his legs as he's grabbing the food, quietly meowing and purring. toji smiles softly to himself at the little thing's neediness. so cute.

the cat also just loves to follow toji around the apartment. always. he goes to the bathroom? the cat goes to the bathroom. he's cooking in the kitchen? the cat is in the kitchen. he's asleep in the bed? the cat is in the bed. (big man toji stomping around the house with the smallest cat in the world running after him.......... guys i'm melting i'm dying)

ok but he was a little weirded out by the cat's need to be in the bathroom with him lmao. like he's taking a piss and he looks over his shoulder only to find the little kitten just staring up at him with big eyes😭😭😭 toji grumbles under his breath and tries to ignore him but then he ends up looking over his shoulder again, hoping that he left but no. he's still there. sitting like :3 😭😭😭😭

"yer fuckin' weird..." is what toji tells him as he places the cat on the bathroom counter and he just gets a cute meow back as a reply. the cat watches him brush his teeth and toji has to fight the thing because he's now in the sink????? toji needs to spit out the toothpaste but the critter is getting comfortable in the bowl and he actually feels bad abt pushing him away... wahh he's so soft actually guys i can't do this anymore.

if the cat happens to be a big meower, toji's definitely talking back to him. he literally goes "what're ya yappin' about, lil man? 🤨🤨" while looking at the tiny creature. but he loves it, he thinks it's so funny. he picks the little guy up and just stares at him up close O.O (plss the cat is literally like the size of his palm i'm dying it's so cute).

he also likes to carry the cat on his shoulder. i think every cat would actually love toji so much, this is also canon here you cannot argue with me. and i think they'd all find him very comforting? and i think they'd love to sleep on him. so whenever he's cooking and the cat paws at his legs, he just picks him up and places him on his shoulder.

he once did that when shiu was over and he was just ????????? like man what are you doing put the damn cat down ????????? and toji just went. "no. he wants to see." with a blank face. to him it's very obvious. c'mon, the cat is so little, he has no idea what's happening up here, ofc he wants to see??????? smh shiu do better😒😒😒

oh and this was definitely just a stray cat he took in btw. after a long day at work, he was just walking home with a cig between his lips when he heard the teeeniest tiniest little meow coming from behind the dumpster in an alley. and well... the curiosity got the best of him and he went to check it out aaand lo and behold!!!!!!! itty bitty kitty!!!!

big eyes peering up at him behind a thrash bag, he just knew he couldn't leave the poor thing there. he reached out his hand, letting the kitty smell him and he almost dropped his cig when he actually leaned into his touch immediately!!!! that's his baby now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

he held the cat to his chest as he made his way home and he even stopped by a little corner store to buy him something to eat. the cashier did look at him with a raised brow bc what the fuck this massive man is holding the smallest cat in the world, but toji didn't mind. he didn't care. the cat slept on his back that very same night.

ALSO. thank u @kentophilia for putting this idea in my head ily<33 during the late hours of the day, toji lays in bed while reading his book with his glasses on – the cat stands on his chest with a determined face. he's already purring even though toji hasn't even done anything. he's just soo comforting and the cat just loves him soooo much okay:((((( toji lowers his book to look at the thing before scratching the top of his head and smiling to himself when the cat closes his eyes and purrs even louder.

the cat ends up trying to make biscuits on him and that makes toji yelp lmao. the tiny little claws dig into his warm skin as the he kneads toji like he's a piece of dough. purring and content – toji doesn't have it in him to make him stop either. it's not like it actually hurts, he was just caught off-guard. he didn't get scared by a cat btw, he didn't. in the end, he keeps reading his book with his one hand while petting the creature with the other. this is their routine. they're family!!!!!!!

anyway. he loves his little kitty cat with all his heart and he would literally kill for him:33333

[cruel-seduction]

Theodore Nott Headcanons

Warning: This piece contains themes of possessiveness, obsessive behavior, and dark romance undertones. Theodore’s devotion might be overwhelming, intense, and not suited for everyone’s taste. Reader discretion is advised.

(+ Requests are open so if you wanna request something, go ahead)

mdni 18+

Theodore Nott 

6’4 | He’s taller than Mattheo, and yes, he lords it over him (quietly, of course, because Theo is above petty behavior… unless it’s funny).

Lean, but don’t be fooled—this man is cut. He’s that deadly kind of fit where you don’t notice at first because he’s always wearing loose sweaters and looking like a poetry major. But the second the sleeves roll up? Oh. My. God. Veins for DAYS, hands strong enough to snap a wand in half (or your will to argue).

He doesn’t work out. Like, ever. He’s just naturally like this. Probably from lugging around all those dark magic books and the emotional weight of his trauma (we love a man with issues!).

(He could choke you with one hand while quoting Dante and your ghost would thank him. RESPECTFULLY!)

Has that sleepy, “don’t bother me, I’m too cool for this” kind of vibe. Until he’s pissed, and suddenly it’s quiet rage central. A single glare from him could silence an entire Great Hall—and probably has.

His abs? Unfair. They’re there, but in the casual, effortless way that makes you want to cry because why do they look that good without trying? If you’re lucky enough to see him shirtless (bless your soul), you’ll be rethinking your life decisions.

Quidditch player energy without ever actually playing. His thing? Sitting in the stands, sipping black coffee, and judging everyone while looking hot.

"YOU WANNA KNOW IF I’D FOLLOW THEODORE INTO A CURSED FOREST AT MIDNIGHT JUST BECAUSE HE SAID SO??? THE ANSWER IS YES. I’D GO, NO QUESTIONS ASKED."

You think he’s calm and controlled until you see him in a duel, and suddenly he’s throwing hexes like he’s possessed. It’s giving “do-not-poke-the-bear” energy, and it’s hot.

His smirk? Criminal. It’s the kind of smirk that makes you forget how to breathe for a second and then hate yourself because he definitely knows the effect it has on people.

“Mia cara,” he says, and you’re done for. No wand needed. He just obliterated your whole existence.

Theodore Nott | Personality

He’s quiet, but it’s that kind of quiet. The "I could verbally destroy you with a single sentence but choose not to because I have better things to do" kind of quiet.

(WE LOVE A MAN WITH RESTRAINED CHAOS!!! IT’S SO SEXY!!!)

His reputation is split down the middle. People either think he’s the chillest guy in Slytherin or they’re low-key terrified of him. There is no in-between. He doesn’t go out of his way to make people uncomfortable, but if you catch his bad side? RIP to you, my friend.

Very composed most of the time, but don’t mistake that for softness. Theo doesn’t raise his voice; he raises his eyebrow. And somehow, that’s worse.

"You really thought that was a good idea? Cute."

Stone-cold when it comes to confrontations. No yelling, no theatrics—just a quiet menace that makes you wish he’d scream at you instead because this is SO MUCH WORSE.

However, if it’s for his friends? Oh, baby, the gloves come off. Someone messes with Mattheo? He’s done. Someone insults you? They’re not showing up to class tomorrow. He’s terrifyingly efficient when it comes to protecting the people he loves.

Doesn’t talk a lot in fights, but his insults are cutting when they come out. And he does it with a smirk that makes you want to both slap him and kiss him.

"What’s the matter? Spellbook too heavy for you? Or is it just that your brain isn’t working?"

Unlike Mattheo, he doesn’t get in trouble for starting fights. Oh no, Theo’s the one who talks his way out of detention, leaving the professors wondering how they ended up apologizing to him.

Let’s be real, Theo has layers. He’s the kind of guy who looks calm and put together on the outside, but his mind? A mess. Overthinks everything, but you’ll never know it because he’s mastered the art of hiding his emotions. (He’s good at this, but it’s also probably why he sleeps like four hours a night.)

Moody, but in a subtle way. You’ll notice when he’s upset because he’ll get even quieter, or start tapping his fingers on the table. He’s not the type to vent about it—he’ll just say “it’s nothing” while his jaw clenches so hard you swear you hear it crack.

Theo loves order. He’s a perfectionist and gets mildly stressed when things don’t go according to plan. He doesn’t lose his temper, though—he just sighs dramatically and mutters something in Italian like "Per l’amor del cielo..."

(BILINGUAL KINGS ARE UNFAIR. WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE CAN INSULT ME IN TWO LANGUAGES?)

A total academic weapon. Not because he tries super hard, but because he’s just naturally brilliant and does the bare minimum to get top marks. He can explain a spell you’ve been struggling with for days in five seconds flat, like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

Always looks like he’s in control, but put him in social situations? Total disaster. Theo’s not awkward, but he doesn’t do small talk. Half the time, he just nods politely and hopes whoever’s talking gets the hint.

Has the driest sense of humor. He’ll drop a sarcastic one-liner so deadpan you’re not even sure if he’s joking.

"I think your essay was… bold. Choosing to write it in such a confusing way must’ve been a creative choice."

Drinks coffee like it’s water. Black coffee, of course. None of that sugary stuff, though he secretly loves when you make him try your sweet drink.

Doesn’t like parties but goes because the group makes him. He’s the guy sitting on the couch, watching everyone else make fools of themselves while holding a drink he hasn’t touched. (He’s your ride home because you know he’s always sober enough to apparate responsibly.)

Theodore Nott | Boyfriend

Ah, Theodore Nott, the walking paradox of calculated charm and quiet vulnerability. Having him as your boyfriend is like playing chess against a master—except the stakes are your heart, and he already has you in checkmate before you even realize the game started.

Manipulation, Thy Name is Theo:Theodore isn’t one to beg for your love; oh no, he’s too smooth for that. Instead, he’ll make sure you think choosing him was your idea all along.

He’ll subtly nudge you into needing him.

He anticipates your desires before you even say them aloud:

"Thirsty? I grabbed your favorite drink. Tired? Don’t worry, I already finished that essay you were stressing about."

He’s not loud about his possessiveness, but it’s there. You don’t realize it at first, but suddenly, every other guy who tries to get too close to you is either giving you a wide berth or “just happened” to fail their next exam. Coincidence? With Theo, nothing is a coincidence.

(We love a man who’s low-key terrifying but only in a protective way!)

How He Realized He Was in Love:Theo didn’t believe in love. Love was messy, uncontrollable, and entirely too risky for someone who thrived on precision and control. But then you came along, and everything changed.

It was slow at first. He didn’t notice it happening until one day, you smiled at him across the library, and he felt his carefully constructed walls crack.

And then it hit him.

“Merlin, I’m in love with her.”

Of course, Theo didn’t panic outwardly. No, he spent the next week internally spiraling.

"What does this mean?"

"What if she doesn’t feel the same way?"

"How do I tell her without sounding like an idiot?"

Eventually, he decided that subtlety was overrated. One evening, while you were sitting in his dorm, flipping through one of his books, he just said it.

"I love you."

You froze, unsure if you heard him correctly. He didn’t look away, his intense gaze pinning you in place.

"You don’t have to say it back. I just needed you to know."

Affection, Theo Style:Theo isn’t flashy or over-the-top, but he’s deeply romantic in his own way.

Words of Praise: He’s a master of compliments that don’t feel like compliments until you think about them later.

"You’re too brilliant for this school, you know that?""How do you manage to look stunning even when you’re furious with me?""You’re the only person who’s ever managed to make me lose focus, mia cara."

Subtle Acts of Service: He’s always doing things for you without making a big deal out of it. Your favorite quill broke? There’s a new one on your desk the next day. You’re stressed about a test? He’ll quiz you until you feel confident (and then reward you with a kiss for every right answer).

The Praise Kink Is Real, Babe:Theo doesn’t just praise you to make you feel good. He needs you to know how much he adores you. Whether it’s your intelligence, your kindness, or just the way you look in his sweater, he’s always quick to remind you of your worth.

"You’re too good for me, you know that?" he murmurs against your ear, his hand resting on your hip. "But don’t think for a second I’ll ever let you go."

(Is it hot in here or is it just Theo?)

The Possessiveness Comes Out in Subtle Ways:

At parties, his hand is always resting somewhere on you—your lower back, your shoulder, your thigh. A quiet signal to everyone else: She’s mine.

If someone flirts with you, he doesn’t cause a scene. Instead, he’ll step in with that dangerously calm demeanor, his words laced with thinly veiled threats.

"I believe you’re in my seat." Translation: Touch her again, and you’ll regret it.

Theodore, the Unexpected Softie:For someone so composed, Theo is surprisingly soft when it’s just the two of you.

He loves curling up with you on the couch, one arm draped over your shoulders while he reads aloud from a book he thinks you’d enjoy.

Sleeps with one hand always touching you—your waist, your hand, your hair. It’s the only time he truly relaxes.

Occasionally whispers “I don’t deserve you” when he thinks you’re asleep.

Having Theo as a boyfriend is a rollercoaster of intensity and tenderness. He’s the type to protect you from the world while also making you feel like you’re the center of his universe. And honestly? We’d ride that roller coaster over and over again.

Theodore Nott | Obsessive Devotion

If Mattheo is chaos in bed, Theodore is calculated destruction. Theo doesn’t rush—no, he takes his time. He knows every move, every word, every touch is designed to drive you absolutely insane.

The Slow Burn King:Theo isn’t just about getting you off; he’s about making you beg. He’s not the type to drag you into the nearest broom closet and go at it like a madman. No, Theo prefers to let the tension build—catching your eye across the library with a smirk, his hand brushing yours during dinner, leaning in close to whisper something sinful in your ear when no one else is looking.

"You’re squirming, mia cara. Tell me, what’s on your mind?"

Possessive but Polished:He loves control—holding you still with a firm grip while his mouth works wonders between your thighs. Theo thrives on the sound of your moans and whimpers, each one a confirmation that you belong to him.

But don’t get it twisted: his possessiveness is refined. He’s not shouting it from the rooftops; instead, he’s branding it into your skin with every kiss, every bite, every low growl of, “Mine.”

(We love a man who can ruin our lives with just one look.)

Praise You Like a Goddess:Theo is the king of praise. He’s not subtle about how much he worships you, and he makes sure you know it.

"You’re so perfect, amore mio. I could stay like this forever, just watching you fall apart for me."

He’ll kiss every inch of your skin like it’s holy ground. He’ll tell you how beautiful you are when you’re flushed, trembling, and completely at his mercy.

And if you praise him back? Game over. Tell him he’s a good boy, and suddenly you’ve unlocked the most obedient, eager-to-please version of Theo. He’ll do anything to hear you say it again.

Control with a Dash of Chaos:Theo’s not loud, but his intensity is deafening. He thrives on being in control, but sometimes he loves to break his own rules. If you push him just enough—maybe tease him in public or drag him into a forbidden situation—he’ll snap in the most delicious way.

"You think you can play games with me? Let me show you how this ends, bella."

Experimentation, but Make It Sophisticated:Theo isn’t one to dive into wild kinks without purpose, but he’s creative when it comes to trying new things.

Silk ties? Check.

Blindfolds? Of course.

Whispering Latin endearments in your ear while he has you completely at his mercy? A standard Tuesday night.

And don’t get me started on the way he uses his fingers—this man could write symphonies with how skillfully he plays your body like an instrument.

Stamina for Days:Don’t let his cool demeanor fool you—Theo can and will go for hours. He has the patience to draw out every moment until you’re gasping and begging for release, and then he’ll do it all over again.

"Oh no, dolcezza. We’re not finished yet. Not until I’ve had my fill of you."

Switch Theo = UNLOCKED:Normally, Theo’s the one in control, but when you take charge? When you straddle his hips, grip his jaw, and order him to behave? He’s putty in your hands.

"Tell me what you want, bella. Anything—it’s yours."

And the best part? He loves it. Watching you take what you want from him, hearing you praise him as he falls apart under your touch—it’s enough to drive him to the brink every single time.

In Private, He’s All Yours:While Theo keeps his emotions tightly guarded in public, behind closed doors, he’s all in. He loves to hold you afterward, running his fingers through your hair and whispering sweet nothings as you both come down from the high.

"You’re everything, you know that? My whole world."

Having Theodore Nott as a lover is like being the muse of a masterpiece—every touch, every word, every moment is designed to make you feel like the most desired person on the planet. And honestly? We’re not complaining

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Please like, Reblog, and comment.

[logansargeantsbabymom]

Lonely Christmas

Lando Norris x Fem!Reader

summary: Lando and Y/N decide that they want to play a prank on their fans and the rest of the grid by hinting at breaking up over X (twitter)

warnings: Cursing & “Cheating”

F1 Masterlist

Follow my instagram account (THATS STRICTLY FOR THIS BLOG) for updates on when i post and fun stuff like that!

instagram

“hey babe, I have an idea.” I said with a smirk as I plopped myself on the bed next to my Formula 1 race winner boyfriend, Lando Norris.

“Oh no, this doesn’t sound good” Lando says chuckling as he props himself on his elbow to get a better view of me, before leaning down pressing a quick kiss to my lips

“mm, I think we should prank your fans and the grid.” I said with the biggest smile I’ve ever smiled in my life.

“and how do you suppose we do that, hmm?” Lando said, his eyes flickering between my eyes and my lips.

Sitting up and criss cross apple sauce, I stare into his soul “I think we should stage a twitter breakup,” I searched his face for some type of answer

“What? Is this a way of telling me you want to breakup without telling me you want to breakup?” He looks kinda hurt, which quickly prompts me to swing my legs over his body so i’m sitting on his lower torso.

“Absolutely not baby! i love you beyond the galaxy. I just think this would be funny,” i plead but Lando looks unsure “I’ll tell you what to say and all !”

“fine, but only if you let me eat you out, BUT you have to sit on my face” Lando knows I’m insecure about my weight and crushing him to death.

“oh! fine!!” I say plopping right off his body and landing on the bed with a huff. “so i’m gonna tweet something to indicate that we’re breaking up but not actually saying anything”

“and how are you gonna do that-” I quickly interrupt him

“make me cry” i say nonchalantly

“what?” Lando’s face reads 50 shades of Stunned “no, I promised you and your family that the one thing i’d NEVER do to you is make you cry.”

Hearing Lando admit that means the world to me, but i need him to stop being nice and make me cry. It doesn’t take much for me to cry and since Lando doesn’t want to make me cry, I’ll resort to the next best thing: thinking of my (very much alive) dog die.

Just a few seconds of thinking of my (breed/dog) die, the tears well up in my eyes and I let out a choked sob, before whipping my phone out and taking a picture before posting it on twitter with the caption

"nobody wants a lonely Christmas but I'm about to call it quits with you. Breaking up is at the top of my wishlist and baby you don't have a clue."

I flip my phone to show Lando with a smirk plastered on my face. "So, what'd ya think?" I question as I post it and wait a few seconds before twitter starts going absolutely nuts. " wait wait let me read you some of the comments I'm getting, 'slut4ln' says 'NO MOM AND DAD PLEASE STOP FIGHTING' haha look, here's another 'mother/n' said 'mother always knows wtf is up, Lando Norris count your days' !!" the chuckles leaving my lips are loud

"I think that I don't know how to respond to that on twitter," Lando says with a faint chuckle "here, how about you take my phone, type out what you want me to say and then let me read it before posting it." a smirk evident on his face as he hands me his phone, before putting said hand on my thigh, rubbing it up and down.

"What about this...?" I question as I'm typing

"You say our relationships fading and you've been thinking bout leaving and though I know it's the truth I just don't want to believe it. You've gotta be kidding me, are we really breaking up? We just picked out a tree, damn."

"Okay Y/N/N lets give it a second to spread, we have to get juicy comments before we keep going, oh. never mind. George is texting me asking me what the fuck I did and why am I arguing twitter about it"

"fuck it, ignore him. we need to make this believable." I say swiping George's message away. "Opinion on this?"

"wait wait, let me tweet something else before you tweet y/n/n. Here, read this"

"You haven't even left yet and I miss you. I was looking forward to the holidays with you. How could you do this on Christmas, girl that's so malicious? C'mon baby, please don't make me beg cause I can go and date your friend instead. Yeah, I'll put the nut in meg. But If you're thinking about leaving, then I already blew it. screw it, then I guess I'll have to beat you to it, bitch."

"OKAYYYY LANDOOOO LET ME STEP UP MY GAME!!!" I scream as I finished reading his reply after he hit tweet bouncing up and down on the bed in excitement.

"okay, okay what about this for me?" I question as I finish typing, turning my phone so Lando can read what I typed.

"I tell you I love you but I don't really mean it, cause after this Christmas sorry but I'm leaving you."

"I'm starting to feel like you're just soft launching a break up with us right now" Lando says "Why else would you gave suggested a fake twitter break up?"

"Baby, please. This is just for shits and giggles. AHH OH MY GOSH!! OSCAR'S CALLING ME" I screamed in panic as I declined the call. "Lando, I think you need to eat me up in the twitter beef again, put your pretty head to work and think of some insults for me."

"I'm almost done, but first I got a question. Why is it one week before Christmas you feel the need to mention a break up with me is in the process but still pending? Is it depending on your gift and what I'm spending? Or are you fishing for more compliments? Because to my astonishment, you're acting like little kid. Was it something I said?Sometimes my head stops thinking, when I say some stupid shit to you, you know I don't mean it, it's just the season, it's confusing, can we just get along?"

"LANDO MY COMMENTS ARE GOING CRAZYYYY! LOOK" I giggle in excitement as I flip my phone so he can scroll through the comments

slut4ln: MOM AND DAD PLEASE STOP! CHRISTMAS IS RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER AND I CAN'T DEAL WITH A DIVORCE RN

georgeswhore: I wake up from a nap to SEE THESE?!?!?!?!

leclercsgf: What the absolute fuck did they fight about that THEYRE BEEFING ON TWITTER FOR AND AIRING OUT A POTENTIAL BREAKUP???

>y/nforpresident: potential? honey I think they are done

Landoslefttoe: Lando kinda ate mom up though 😭😭

LewisHamilton: Answer your fucking phones now!

CharlesLeclerc: LANDO?? YOU CALL YOUR GIRLFRIEND "BITCH"??

CarlosSainz: Cabron, call me asap and fill me in

LoganSargeant: Does this mean I actually have a chance with Y/n?

"I'm choosing to ignore Logan's comment," Lando said flipping my phone back so I could read it. "When are we gonna go public and say it was a prank?" Lando asks as he readjusts himself on the bed, pulling me down and closer to him so we're cuddling

"We can tell them all tomorrow" I yawn as I cuddle closer to my boyfriend "goodnight handsome"

"Goodnight precious" lando whispers as he kisses my temple

<333333

idk what this is but 🎀😗

@luckyladycreator2 @itsmiamalfoy @jeffs77 @ilivbullyingjeongin @forevercaffeinated-lee @daemyratwst @gulphulp @callsignwidow @f1wintermoon13 @teenwolf01 @victoriassecret101.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSesvRpKqBaYY-Ow5IgHoD0gSX6OzJ03qGMXOhHUI6Xg1wfKaA/viewform.

[chrolloluvr]

Adam, Mammon, Alastor and Lucifer if S/O is on their period

Note: AFAB!Reader, not proofread, (should I make a story out of mammons??)

Warnings: Mentions of sex, minor degrading?, fluff 🥺, cute moments

Adam 🕊️:

He has an idea of how periods or the menstrual cycle work. In his time of being married to Eve and Lilith, he basically just let them handle it themselves. But with you, thats not how it works

When you get moody swings, he tells you that your being dramatic.

"Babe what the hell? Take a chill pill, jesus."

Please slap him across the face.

When you get cramps, he will throw you some Pepto bismol and call it a day.

If you send him to the store, he will ask you what flavor tampon you want (???), and if he can have a visual representation on what size he needs.

He tried to FaceTime you 15 times...

Had to disguise himself so nobody knew he was there.

He will offer to have sex with you, since that was what seemed to work with his other two wives

Goes out and buys you snacks, but he forgets that you're on your period so he mostly bought them for himself.

Asks Lute for advice, since he isn't a girl.

You end up with your head resting on his shoulders, while you sit in his lap. He will call you a drama queen, but he will still comfort you.

Mammon 🕸️:

He knows literally nothing about periods or the menstrual cycle.

He never really cared to learn anything about it either, since he had never taken any romantic interest in anybody until you. He considered it a waste of time.

When you have mood swings, he does not take you seriously, and he will probably baby you.

"Awhh, dont get your thong in a twist sugar. Now calm down before i have to hold your ass down-"

When cramps roll around, he will just put his hand over your lower stomach. And just, leave it there? He thinks it helps you, so don't argue with him or he will back off of you.

When you send him to the store, he asks you for your pussy size...

Will FaceTime you, and show you all of the options.

Gets stopped and asked for photos multiple times, so it takes him like an hour.

He ends up getting you Nutella, pads, and a menstrual cup, because he thought it looked funny. He even jokes about it being his next big product.

Offers to eat you out. Yes, while you are on your period. He is a freak. He does not mind getting his mouth bloody. I HC that he actually prefers when you are on your period, because he likes the metallic tase and smell it emits.

Wont let you out of his sights during this time. He will let you lay on top of him while you two watch your favorite show. And he will hand feed you the chocolate and say,

"Heres comes the choo choo train cutie 😙"

Lucifer 👑:

He knows a lot about the menstrual cycle and how it works. He was very attentive to Lilith during their marriage.

When you get moody, he will distance himself from you, not wanting to add more fuel to the fire.

"Hey honey, I just wanted to check in on you, see how you were doing, you know-"

When you have cramps, he hates seeing you in pain, so he will heat up a heating pad and rest it on your stomach.

When you send him to the store, he goes in a disguise. He will call you and ask what specific products you want.

He ends up getting you strawberries, chocolate, medicine, etc.

He treats you like you are sick. Will force you to stay in bed under his supervision.

Will also offer to eat you out. He just wants to make you feel better, and he is an expert.

He will spoon-feed you medicine, and turn on your favorite show. He will snuggle up against your chest and fall asleep.

Will ask Charlie for some advice and help. He really does care for you deeply. So he just wants to make sure you are content and satisfied.

Alastor 🦌:

Knows quite a bit about period and the menstrual cycle.

When you get moody, he will also coddle you like Mammon. Will purposely try to get you more upset. But stops after a while, since he is a gentlemen.

"My little doe, lets stop with this tantrum. Your a big girl, aren't you?

When you get cramps, he will come up behind you and trap you in a bear hug while rocking the both of you. He will do this while using his thumbs to rub your shoulders.

Instead of the store, he goes to Rosie and asks her for supplies and advice. He hates seeing you upset, so what better of a person to ask for advice from than his long time friend Rosie?

He will not want to do anything sexual with you. Not because he does not like getting bloody, (he has, and isn't afraid to.), But because he does not want to possibly hurt you.

He will try to stay near you as much as possible. He maaaay even let you touch his ears if you look up at him all nice and cute.

Tells you a story, or will turn on the radio for you to both listen to.

[flamingpudding]

do you still take requests? if you do can you write your take on this idea https://www.tumblr.com/ilydana/746501696852819968/cloneclonedbatman?source=share

Thanks for the Ask! That's is an interesting one!

Also as long as I can write something to it I don't mind getting requests, if I can't I will let people know if I can. So no worries about that K?

Out of courtesy and because I believe its is the right thing to do here the Link and a Tag to the original writer @ilydana I hope you don't mind that I am taking inspiration from you for this.

Also I don't know Conners Timeline well and I like to base my writings on the Wayne Family Adventures settings so.... yea sorry if I got some facts wrong....

-------------------------------

Clone double Wamy

Thinks were never easy for the Waynes, Bruce realised that when he sat in the meeting room. Usually he would have confronted his best friend in a more private setting, like when it was just the two of them or only Diana with them. But his best friend had been grating on his nerves with this for a while now. Bruce had honestly believed Clark had gotten better with the whole Clone thing but apparently he hadn't.

"All I am saying is that Conner is a person and to stop referring to him as 'it'." Bruce wasn't sure what had this brought on but maybe it was also having listened to his own kids rants about the way Conner had been and sometimes still was treated by Clark. Usually when someone called his friend out on it he would laugh awkwardly and say it was a slip of the tongue. That he still wasn't completely used to the idea of having a clone.

It's been years and Bruce wasn't buying that excuse anymore.

Well his persistent nagging had now caused this petty fight in front of everyone. He knew his children present, Dick and Tim, would have his back as well as most of their friends. But he also knew that those that prefer to keep the peace would try to argue in Clarks favor to sweep this hole problem under the rug once more.

"You don't get what it is like to be cloned or how long it takes to get used to it!"

His eye twitched under his cowl, he could also feel his kids tense up, especially Tim. His entire family had expirence when it came to cloning. The number of labs from the LoA they had shut down and destroyed was a testament to it. But there was one thing his entire Family aside from Alfred didn't know either.

"I actually do."

He stated calmly watching Clarks reaction as he stared unwaveringly at his best friend. He could see the colour drain, the paling and the pure look of disbelief he was getting, while Nightwing and Red Robin stood up to stand behind him with crossed arms. They probably thought he was referencing the time they had to fight Damian's Clones that sadly couldn't be saved like Conner had been.

"What do you....?" His best friend started but wasn't able to finish his question as Bruce decided to rip the bandaid off.

"The original Bruce Wayne died before he even was one month old. My parents, unable to cope with the loss cloned the baby with the help of a pair of scientist from Illinois." If the situation was different he might have laughed into the faces the people around him were making, not very Batman like of him but it was kind of funny. Still he was thankful for the comforting hand his son, Dick, placed on his shoulder or the way his other son, Tim inched closer protectively like. These two while probably shocked still stood by his side.

"And i was not the only clone that resulted from my parents original grief."

He left it at that as he stood and left the meeting without any further explanation. Bruce had made his point clear, now the ball was in his friends court. He was thankful that his kids followed him out as he went straight to the Zeta-Tubes to return to the Batcave. He knew his kids had questions for him, but he was not willing to answer them in front of the other heroes and thankfully his kids knew that that. So they silently followed him until they were back to the cave.

"B?" Dick asked tentatively once they were back in the came.

"It is as simply as I stated. My parents grieved the loss of their original son and unable to cope they cloned their own child with the help of a pair of scientist." He reiterated his earlier statement not looking at the two at first. For a brief moment he was thankful his other kids were out and about busy with other things.

"A pair of scientists?" Tim propped further and Bruce sighed wondering how much he should tell or if he could keep some things secret.

"Family actually. Estranged but they were... are family." He nodded. "The Fentons. Jack Fenton was my fathers cousin. Because of his field of research he got estranged from the family, not fitting into the perfect image my great grandparents had in mind for the Waynes originally. My father contacted him for help regarding the cloning back then."

"You said you weren't the only one?" He gave Tim a small smile, it was just like him to catch on to the small details and focus his questions on that.

"I didn't know until many years later when my parents died." He smiled a little remembering back to his training with Lady Gotham and how she asked him if he had siblings and then proceeded to introduce him to his clone twin. Ever since then Danny had become quite the fixture in his life, a reconnected family member. Though they had needed a lot of help when it came to actually speaking with each other but that thankfully Danny's sister Jazz helped.

He couldn't help the laugh that escaped him when he noticed Dick's stare of realisation. "Uncle Danny!"

Bruce just smirked, chuckling lightly as he gave his eldest a slight nod. "Danny."

Dick was the most familiar with Danny having meet the other a couple of times when he was younger and just started out as Robin. Bruce wasn't ashamed to say that Danny and Alfred had been the two he had asked for advice the most when he had taken Dick in back then. Danny had already expirence in raising kids from an even younger age than Bruce had. That their two cousins Dan and Danielle were in a way clones too was however something he would not be telling his kids yet. Frankly it wasn't his place and honestly if Danny hadn't become as comfortable as he had with this fact over the year he wouldn't have outed his clone twin to his kids either.

"So...." Tim started, rubbing the back of his head nervously. "...what now? Not that it will change anything now but uh...."

"Nothing really? I mean if Clark still got a problem then well I guess we don't have a super uncle anymore? But hey maybe we could introduce Uncle Danny to Conner?" Dick shrugged turning to Tim.

"But that would mean we admit to Uncle Danny that B let us in in the secret and that could make things awkward and..."

"Tim you are overthinking! It will be fine!"

Bruce smiled as he watched his two sons start to argue wether or not to introduce Danny to Conner. Well even if they did Danny wouldn't mind it. In fact Bruce had kept his clone twin updated on a lot of things that happened with his work as Batman. One of the reasons was that Danny had started out in the hero business way sooner than Bruce had but also because Danny was his last resort contingency plan against everything.

His twin would probably laugh in their faces and ask why it took them so long to introduce them and then drag his own daughter to meet Conner so they could have some 'clone'-bonding time and knowing Danielle, she was going to drag Dan along and then Bruce himself too. Bruce chuckled at that thought, he also knew that if Clark doesn't clean up his act than Danny would most likely swoop in and adopt Conner right out of under Clarks nose.

Well all he had to say if it came to that was that his best friend wouldn't be able to blame anyone but himself then.

[littlexdeaths]

eddie munson x fem reader

warnings: mostly fluff but all my works are 18+, established relationship, fear of flying, a very dramatic nose bleed and eddie being an adorable but horny mf

a/n: i recently started rewatching supernatural again, and in doing so i came to the conclusion that dean and eddie are very similar. so this is a little something that’s loosely based off a scene in season 1, episode 4: phantom traveler. enjoy xx.

“are you seriously humming enter sandman right now?” you ask, amusement creeping into your voice as you glance over beside you.

only to see your boyfriend. with his cheeks flushed, leg bouncing erratically and ringed fingers gripping tightly onto the armrest nestled between you.

when you originally brought up the idea to book a flight to visit your folks for the holidays, instead of making the almost 10 hour trek to good ole’ minnesota, eddie had seemed all for it.

he encouraged it actually.

making some joke about how his “decrepit, aching twenty-six year old body” couldn’t handle another 10 hour drive.

however, the closer the trip loomed, the more reluctant eddie became. and he tried every which way to get you to cancel the flight and make the dreaded drive instead. but that was an argument he wasn’t going to win.

it wasn’t until the plane began to ascend into the air that the reason for his sudden reluctance became blatantly obvious.

eddie munson was scared, no scratch that—petrified of flying.

and try as you may, you just found that new tidbit to be even more endearing.

eddie gives you a sideways glare as you attempt to hide your grin. and really it shouldn’t be this funny. but maybe your lack of sleep from the early morning drive to the airport is finally beginning to weigh on you and soon the delirious giggles will start to kick in.

“yes, it calms me,” he huffs, gaze tearing away from you to glance out the small window of the plane.

“well you don’t look very calm to me.”

you rest a hand on his bouncing knee, just as another round of turbulence rocks through the cabin. and your amusement quickly delves into concern as he grips your arm to pull you closer into his side.

“okay—that cannot be normal!” he nearly whines, leaning his head back against the seat.

“baby, it’s just a little turbulence. you know you’re more likely to die in a car accident than on an airplane, right?”

while he appreciates your attempt to ease his mind a bit, it’s seriously not working.

“nice try, but i’ve seen final destination, sweetheart. i know how this shit ends.”

and you can’t help but roll your eyes at his dramatics.

soon his humming starts back up, becoming a lot louder. and earning him a solid kick in the back from the teenager seated in the row behind you. the kick seems to be perfectly timed however. as the force of it and another jostle of the plane has his body flying forward, his nose smashing directly into the seat in front of him.

his pained groan has your temper flaring, ready to whip your head around and give that shit head kid a piece of your mind. but you freeze when you notice the way he’s cradling his nose. your gaze following the drops of crimson that have dribbled down his chin and onto his shirt.

“shit, eddie you’re bleeding.”

he makes a noise in confirmation, but before he can utter some sarcastic remark you have unbuckled both of your seatbelts and hauled him to his feet.

the flashing seatbelt sign be damned.

a flight attendant tries to stop you on your way down the aisle toward the bathroom, but you’re having none of it.

“miss, you both need to return to your—”

and if looks could kill, this whole plane would come crashing down.

“either you let me through so i can help clean him up, or he makes a mess of your aircraft. your choice.”

while you can tell she wants to argue, seeing the blood beginning to seep through the space between his fingers has her moving aside to let you pass.

“christ, sweetheart.” eddie groans when you carefully shove him inside the small bathroom and squeeze in behind him.

“sit, now.” you order.

he does as instructed, spreading his legs so you can slip in between them. you grab a wad of the practically sheer toilet paper, running a corner of it beneath the stream of water.

“keep the bridge of your nose pinched, it’ll help stop the bleeding.”

and when you turn back toward him, your brows pull together in confusion. his lips are stretched in a toothy grin, any trace of his anxiety now forgotten.

at least for the moment.

you begin to gently dab at the drying blood on his upper lip, thankful that most of the gushing had ceased for the time being. and eddie winces slightly once you start to clean around his nose.

“why are you looking at me like that?” you ask, having felt his burning gaze from the moment he sat down.

“you’re just…” he trails off, slipping his fingers through the loop of your jeans to tug you closer—if that were even possible. “really fuckin’ sexy when you’re bossy.”

and a subtle glance down has you huffing out a laugh of disbelief.

“eddie, do you seriously have a boner right now?”

and he just grins wider.

“guilty as charged.”

[onepieceisreeeeaaalll]

𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗙𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗹𝘆 - 𝗭𝗼𝗿𝗼 𝘅 𝗙𝗲𝗺!𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿

Hey, hey! Here's another contribution from the drafts. I meant to get this out earlier but I've been overthinking it haha. I'm still new to writing smut and I tend to write and rewrite, not to mention I've only just recently picked up writing again after years of doing it intermittently. I'll probably do what I always do and edit it for redundancies, mistakes, etc. This is almost pure NSFW but I did add a little prelude and a fluffy ending. Nothing crazy. Hope you enjoy!

CW: NSFW!! Gendered terms for reader (female); breeding kink; creampie; p in v; mention of overstimulation; use of term 'daddy'; actual talk of starting a family

~1.9K words

-----------

Zoro wants kids. You wouldn't think it, given his typical demeanor, the way he interacts with kids, the big goals he has for his life. He's always liked the idea of little children running around, though - sparring with them, arguing, playing games, and telling stories. Yeah, Zoro wants kids. A family.

So, when you laugh at a comment Sanji makes in disgust about ‘a bunch of stupid green-haired babies popping out of you,' you have to do a double-take at Zoro's response. 

“Yeah? What's so funny about that?”

You blink, a stupid smile still stuck on your face from when you were keeling over at Sanji's remarks. The laughter slowly dies, though, as you start to process his words. There’s something deadly serious about Zoro’s tone that makes your smile fade.

“Wait, what?” You ask, your attention fully turned towards the grumpy demeanor of your boyfriend sitting beside you.

You'd both been sitting in the galley of the Sunny, Zoro only following you in because you were insistent on talking to the curly-browed cook to see if he needed help setting up for lunch. Idle conversation and jokes that had been made seemed mostly tuned out by Zoro. You weren't even sure he was listening until the comment he just made.

“I said ‘what's so funny?’ Don't you wanna have my kids?” Zoro retorts. 

Sanji’s just as surprised as you are, but he lets out a small snort before taking a long drag from his cigarette. “Who would want to have your brats, mosshead?” 

“Who asked you, shit cook? Where the hell is lunch, anyway?” 

Sanji grumbles under his breath, something about Zoro being a lazy jackass, but he reluctantly pads back off to the stove where he has food cooking for the upcoming mealtime. Sanji’s reaction isn’t even on your radar, though. You’re still reeling from Zoro’s question and the tone in which he said it.

“Zoro. You're kidding.” You say, your voice even. “What, you mean - you want kids?” 

“Yeah.”

It's so blunt, treated as something so obvious that you almost feel like you’re in a different reality. You stare at each other quietly, and you're not entirely sure but you swear you can see the gears in Zoro's head turning as well. It’s a pretty big step in your relationship, all things considered. You two had barely broached the topic of marriage once or twice, and those conversations weren’t particularly enlightening about what the future holds for you. But…kids. Zoro…wants kids. That much is certain.

With an awkward laugh, you tell him casually that you’d like to talk with him about it another time in an attempt to brush off the topic entirely. It’s obvious by his reaction that he’s not happy, but he decides to drop it at the sight of your other crewmates entering the galley.

So, that’s that. For now.

-----------

Loud moans and the sound of skin slapping leave the walls of the men's quarters, almost making the sock on the door handle obsolete. At this point, the sock was really just a formality to make you feel better. Both you and Zoro knew that if you were going to go at it like you usually did, everyone on the ship would know to steer clear the moment they walked within a fifteen-foot radius. Honestly, it was a joke at this point amongst the crew. Everyone was very well aware of your active - and loud - sex life.

Strong, calloused hands hold your thighs down against your chest, pinning you down into the bed. Zoro's cock slides into you with practiced ease, pumping in a familiar but hungry rhythm. His brows are furrowed as though he's concentrating, and through your sex addled haze, you can see a bead of sweat dripping down from his forehead. 

“Fuuuuck, (y/n). Pussy feels so good for me.” He groans. 

“Zoro, yes!” You gasp. One of your hands grips against his forearm, leaving light clawmarks from your nails against his skin. The sting makes Zoro hiss in delight.

“Yeah? You like that, (y/n), you like that?! Yeah? You want it harder?!” 

Zoro picks up the pace easily, his hands gripping your thighs as he angles and thrusts himself down into you. He loves the fucked out look in your eyes, the way you coo and keen under his touch. It’s something that he’s sure he’s gotten addicted to, and has even gone as far as to tell you on multiple occasions. 

All of this is so overwhelming, agonizingly intoxicating, and the pleasure building in your body isn’t doing much to help placate the frustration. An impulsive horny thought crosses your mind, though. The inkling of an idea. A solution. It could possibly backfire, but you were at the point of desperately needing a release. He had been going at you for almost an hour now, stopping when either of you got too close. Something about ‘wanting to take his time with you.’ You can’t even remember at this point, you’ve been denied that climax so many times that all you can think about is the feeling of Zoro’s cock dragging against your walls and the need to release the aching tension in your pussy. This move was risky, but hey, it's worth a shot. 

“Harder! Fuck-…put a baby in me!” You exclaim.

This sets something in Zoro off, halting him in a way neither of you were prepared for. He pauses all movements of his hips as if trying to process what he thinks he heard you say. It finally seems to click, though. With a devilish grin, he leans forward, his face only inches from yours. His body weighs down on you, pressing you harder into the bed. Without warning, his cock slides into you only once - harder, more deliberate - as his eye flickers over your face. Your eyes are half-lidded, tears prickling just out of the corners, though the way he slams his cock into you widens them.

“Yeah? That what you want? Wanna have my kids?” Zoro asks, his breath brushing over your lips. 

“Fill me up, Zoro…get me pregnant. Please. Need you to come in me.” You sputter breathlessly, your nose just brushing against his. 

Somehow, his grin widens further, and a small chuckle leaves him. You can feel him twitch inside you and you know for certain that this calculated risk has more than paid off.

“Shit, okay.” Zoro huffs, his movements continuing with a new primal urgency. “Yeah, there you go, pretty girl. Take it. Take my cock.” 

There is something profoundly different about the way Zoro is fucking you now. The mating press he has you in seems more firm than before, his hands on your thighs squeezing with the effort of him ramming his cock into you. The head of his length brushes over your g-spot again and again, that perfect amount of pressure causing you to writhe and groan beneath him. Every sound that leaves you, every tremble of your thighs, only makes him double his efforts.

“Yeah, yeah, just like that. Keep going. Take it! Gonna put a baby in you!” 

You can hardly believe the words you’re hearing growled at you, the way they’re cut through with the grunts and moans. Zoro has always put what felt like the maximum amount of effort into sex. It’s just who he is - he doesn’t half-ass anything he cares about, and fucking is one of those things. For some reason, though, every pass of his cock feels like it’s igniting some kind of new energy in him. A desperation - a need - that’s making it hard to even think of anything beyond the approaching precipice of orgasm. Your walls clench around him as though trying to keep him there, and the sounds that are leaving the both of you are nearly animalistic as Zoro fervently picks up his pace.

“Fuuuck, I'm gonna fill you up. Fill you up with my come and make you pregnant. You're gonna - nnng - be so fucking hot all swollen with my baby. Can’t wait.” 

Your hands clench the sheets with the effort of trying to hold steady, to focus on the orgasm that’s getting closer and closer. His words are only amplifying the building heat, that coil getting tighter and tighter in your cunt. With every pathetic whine and cry that leaves you, Zoro’s hips collide into yours, his balls slapping loudly against your skin. You’re so close, have been chasing this orgasm for so long, and Zoro knows it. And now he wants to get you both there. With no effort on his part, he finally relents, moving a hand down to rest against your lower abdomen. 

“Feel my cock in you, baby? You’re taking it so deep. Just a little more.” Zoro groans, unable to hide his own rapid build-up.

He slides his thumb down from where his hand rests, rubbing up and down against your clit in a steady rhythm. It’s his finishing move, the one that always gets you there, and its effects are damn near immediate. The way he’s bullying your g-spot with his cock, railing his hips into yours, and rubbing over your clit causes the sensations to build and build until-! 

“That's good, baby. Come on my cock. Milk me and make me a daddy.” 

You clamp a hand over your mouth as you ride the high, the ecstasy crashing down again and again. As you’re sent firmly over the edge, you clench hard around his cock which elicits another loud groan from Zoro, his seed spilling into you until it seeps out of your pulsing cunt. You groan and pant together, Zoro’s hips gradually slowing down until both of you have been properly worked through your respective releases.

You barely even register his cock leaving you. The bed shifts with his weight where he collapses beside you, an arm thrown over his eyes as he tries to catch his breath. It’s silent for a while, both of you recovering from the intense influx of chemicals and the racing of your hearts. The silence draws on, though, to the point where you're starting to feel a tension settling in your stomach. A conversation needs to happen, that much is clear, and the unspoken words do little to actually let either of you fully soak in the afterglow. It surprises you when Zoro’s the first one to speak.

“You serious about wanting a baby with me?” Zoro finally says, his voice gruff and low. 

You hum as you turn on your side towards him, working hard to find the right words in response. He’s already looking at you, peeking under his thick forearm that rests on his forehead. Zoro looks wrecked, with disheveled green locks poking out in different directions and a thin layer of sweat glistening over his whole body. His chest is heaving significantly less than before, but there’s still a noticeable effort in the way his lungs extend and contract. You find your hand drawn to the broad expanse of his chest, resting gently against his warm skin.

“Yeah. I just didn’t know when to bring it up. Figured in the heat of the moment was as good a time as any.” You reply, a playful smile rising to your lips.

You watch as Zoro grins in return immediately, his eye lighting up in a way that you’ve only seen a handful of times. It’s missing it’s usual devilish charm, instead replaced with a sparkle that shines radiantly. His hand immediately grabs yours on his chest, holding it in place as if intending to keep it. There’s a pure joy growing in your chest that can’t be contained.

“Then you’d better stop taking those stupid birth control pills Chopper gives you. There’s going to be a lot more where that came from.”

[bomber-grl]

Hugging Leo

Pairing(s): Leo Valdez x Gn!Reader

Req ~ Hello!! Can I request a Leo Valdez x reader where Leo really likes readers hugs and just melts into them

A/n: I added some extra

You two met, fell in love and got together

Someway, somehow, Leo had not given you an actual hug

Like you two would joke, lean on each other, you’ve even kissed idk how many times

But the hugs you’ve shared only ever lasted for like a second

Then, one day you just decide to hug him

It was random and out of nowhere, not that it mattered

This was the first time that the itch Leo had for physical affection was finally scratched

He doesn’t remember how long you two stood there, just embracing, but he does remember how much he loved the hug

He practically melted, molding to fit in your arms perfectly

This doesn’t go unnoticed either

He teases and makes jokes, but you can tell he really looks forward to any affection you give him, especially these hugs of yours

So give them to him, we all know how desperately blud needs them

Eventually it becomes a daily occurrence

So much so that Leo becomes absolutely and utterly shameless

Always going to see you (whether you’re at camp, the Waystation, your house, etc) just to receive some affection

(The distance won’t be too long since you’re inseparable)

Others begin noticing and your friends at camp, Emmie and Jo, even Festus 😭 begin to tease him

I mean Jo was one of the people that Leo talked to about you (mainly for advice) so it was inevitable

Aside from just liking them, Leo feels absolutely safe when you hug him

He’s barely been introduced to the demigod lifestyle (in comparison to you probably)

So being able to relax is a limited luxury

There was always this or that, and if it wasn’t, it was something entirely else

Even before he met Piper and Jason, went to camp half blood and built the Argo-

He was couch surfing for a good while (can only be described that way since he was hardly ever at his foster homes) no security whatsoever and had no idea what tomorrow would be like

Especially when he’d sleep under the Houston bridge

At least now when you hold him he allows himself to be himself than just joking all the time as a way to cope

Plus, you really just make him feel like he isn’t the “7th wheel”

Honestly a firm believer that you hugging him would cure all his problems

Which is why he always goes to you when he’s had a bad day

Maybe it was when you guys visit camp and he has to wait to see you, or after school when you guys have no classes together and he’s just exhausted

Even without an excuse he’ll still look for you.

-

Today a friend and fellow camper had gotten harmed while you two practiced (truly a story for another time) and so you had to accompany her to the infirmary. Not just because you cared, but was also just worried overall.

Leo must’ve heard from a Dionysus kid through the grapevine because one moment you’re by your friends side as Will is treating her and the next Leo is at your side.

At first he’s apprehensive and skims his eyes over you from head to toe, once he sees that you’re not hurt he sighs and starts sulking.

Just a playful and weirdly funny habit he’s learned (?)

“I thought you were hurt when I heard that you had come to the infirmary” honestly a pretty valid assessment.

“Awww” you’re babying him, just to tease his previous behavior “I’m sorry I worried you”

You went in and gave him a wholehearted hug, just to emphasize your point you began soothing the back of his head.

And to add some theatrics, you began swaying him back and forth.

Usually Leo loved to be affectionate and open back, but seeing as he got caught in his arguably cringe response, well…

Leos face immediately flushed and despite it, he still hugged you back, melting into your arms.

He didn’t argue, didn’t say anything really. Maybe he just wanted to get rid of the humiliation he felt.

Sometimes he just gets a bit shy at the affection is all

-

So sorry it was short, i literally could not rack my brain for the life of me

Also, The friend watching: 🧍

[harlowsbby]

Nonsense 💘

Requested, What about the reader pranking Jack by making him think she doesn’t want him kissing her.

“You two must want me to be single for the holidays or what?”

Urban and Annie laughed at your answer to their questions. “Come on it’ll be fun and you know it.” Annie argued.

“I agree, you know how worked up Jack gets it’ll be so funny he’d be so confused and irritated at the same time.” You rolled your eyes and huffed.

Urban and Annie came up with this bright idea well more like a prank. The saw a few videos going around of girls either dodging or acting like they don’t want a kiss from their boyfriends.

You weren’t going to lie you were actually down to do it but at the same time the two of you have been arguing lately like cats dogs and the last thing you wanted to do was start up another argument.

“What’s in it for me?” You asked them. “We’ll do anything you want for 24 hours?” Urban said.

“That’s all? I need something more.” Annie rolled her eyes. “I’ll buy you coffee for an entire week straight.” You smirked. “Sounds like a deal.”

After they explained everything again you hung up the phone and waited on the couch till Jack got back home from the studio.

It was about twenty minutes later when Jack came walking through the door, a smile and all was displayed on his face upon seeing you.

“Hey baby.” He said and placed his keys down into the bowl near the entry way.

When you didn’t say anything his head immediately shot up towards you, his eyebrows scrunched together.

“Babe? Can you not hear me or what.” He said and started to approach you. It was honestly really hard trying not to acknowledge him because all you wanted to do was kiss him and let him hold you.

“Hellooo? Earth to Y/N I know you can hear me I’m standing right in front of you.”

He huffed when you didn’t even flinch or anything, you just kept scrolling through your phone.

“What? I’m sorry Jack I was so into this game.” You decided to talk to him but whenever he tried to lean in for a kiss you’d dodge it.

“I was going to say I know you weren’t about to give me the silent treatment again. I missed you today.” He leaned down and went to give you a kiss and moved back slightly.

“How was the studio? Anything interesting happen today?”

You asked him and stood up and made your way into the kitchen. He stood there for a minute more trying to process that you just completely dodged his kiss.

When he made it into the kitchen you were grabbing a box of red velvet cake mix.

“I was thinking about making some cupcakes what do you think?” You asked him and tried your best to stiff a laugh at how confused he looked.

“What’s up with you?” He asked questionably. “What do you mean? Nothing is wrong all I asked was do you wanna help me bake some cupcakes or not.”

“I mean yeah I’ll help you I guess.” You smiled. “Sounds good just get me my mixing bowl and a spoon.” He nodded and went and grabbed what you needed.

When he came back he placed everything down in front of you and leaned forward to try and place another kiss on your lips but you pulled back once again.

Jack was in disbelief he wasn’t sure what your issue or problem was but he didn’t understand why you weren’t allowing him to kiss you.

“Alright Y/N what’s your problem dude?” You laughed. “Dude? I’m not your dude I’m babe, baby or boo.” He rolled his eyes.

“No you’re not because my baby allows me to kiss her. When I came back home you were ignoring me and now you keep dodging my kisses, what the hell did I do now?” He raised his hands in frustration.

“You didn’t do anything I’m just trying to bake us some cupcakes.” You innocently stated and opened up the box of cake mix.

“Am I being pranked or some shit? Give me a kiss.” He went back in to place a quick peck to your lips but you pulled back and laughed.

“Seriously!” You grinned. “What?” You asked innocently. He smacked his lips.

“Fuck this ima get my kiss.” He quickly grabbed the back of your neck gently and forced your head up and placed a long and gentle kiss to your lips before pulling back.

“Was that so hard? That’s all I wanted.” He stated and grabbed the bowl from you and started pouring all the ingredients into the bowl.

You couldn’t help but to laugh if there was one thing Jack was good at it was getting his way.

“So who made you do this little prank?” He asked while you sat across from him.

“Urban and Annie they though it would be funny.” You knew they’d both give you shit for ratting them out but you didn’t care.

“The next time I see Urban I’m beating his ass as for Annie well I guess she gets a pass this time.” You laughed and leaned up a bit over the counter and went to place a kiss to Jack’s lips but he pulled back making you gasp.

“Two can play that game baby.” You groaned and whined. “Seriously?!? It was a little prank. You’re so petty and childish.”

He shrugged his shoulders and grinned. “But you love me though.”

“That I do, that I do.” The rest of the night was spent cuddled up by the fire just enjoying your cupcakes in peace.

[morganbritton132]

Hi, I binge read the entirety of your EMTTS and i absolutely love it! I wanted to thank you for your dedication and for how much you made me laugh. It's really great to find a saga that's funny and also gut-wrenching and written by someone who's a) very talented and b) clearly loves the characters and makes them very well rounded even in little snippets of life. So thank you!!

I also can't stop thinking about the initial "is Dustin a person or a dog" confusion and how much it reminds me of that episode of B99 where everyone's asking subtle questions to their coworker to understand if Kelly is his wife or dog, like "did you two go on any nice walks recently?" and i can see someone like David trying it and failing

Thank you so much for so many kind words and I’m glad that you’re enjoying the series because I am too! (Also, super impressed you got through it because it’s a lot!). I love that cold opening of Brooklyn 99 and it was the inspiration for that tag.

Also, I love the idea of the first-year teachers trying to figure out if Dustin is a person or a dog. That’s brilliant!

And what’s funny is that David’s not even wrong in this situation.

He is like 99% sure that Dustin is the name of Steve’s brother, but he’s been wrong about literally everything else, so this debate continues into its third week at their table in the teacher’s lounge.

David argues, “I’ve heard him refer to Dustin as a kid.”

“People call their dogs their fur babies all the time,” Marissa argues back. “He’s had that dog for a few years, right? Certainly not a baby anymore so, kid.”

It is not helped by the fact that none of them have any memory of ever hearing Steve address his service dog by name. They’ve heard him call him ‘buddy.’ They’ve heard him say ‘c’mon, pal.’ There was even an unenthused ‘Ozz-some’ last week when Ozzy alerted Steve to an impending seizure during his lunch break.

Have any of them thought of looking at the dog’s collar? No.

They haven’t even considered asking a student.

They are in the middle of this debate when Steve comes into the teacher’s lounge to refill his coffee mug for the third time that day. If he notices that the room goes quiet every time he walks in, he doesn’t make any indication of it when he smiles tiredly, “Hey, guys.”

They murmur their hellos and give each other significant looks, daring the others to ask the important questions. No one asks. No one actually says anything until Steve yawns.

“Long night?”

“Yeah, definitely. Dustin had me up ‘til two in the morning,” Steve yawns again. He doesn’t notice how everybody perks up at that. “Poor guy gets so anxious this time of year.”

“Oh, really?” Marissa asks, giving David a look that says ‘see, dog.’. “Because of the homecoming fireworks?”

Steve hums in agreement and shakes his head like he sometimes does when he’s shaking a memory loose. He’s speaking more to himself when he adds, “I think I’m going to take him to the park after work. Get some fresh air, some exercise. He’s been cooped up for too long.”

“Anyways,” Steve says with a smile, tipping his coffee mug to them. “Gotta get back to grading papers.”  

[n0pr0mises]

𝚒 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊 𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎

𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚒𝚜 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏-𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚞𝚕𝚐𝚎𝚗𝚝, 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝙸 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚜𝚊𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚞 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚖𝚢 𝚌𝚊𝚝 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚜 𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚖. 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚌𝚞𝚝𝚎𝚛, 𝙸'𝚖 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝚒𝚝 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚕 :/ 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙸 𝚊𝚕𝚜𝚘 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔 𝚊𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚜𝚘, 𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚋𝚕𝚎 𝚘𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐

𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: 𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢. 𝚐𝚘𝚓𝚘 𝚡 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛, 𝚏𝚎𝚖 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛, 𝚏𝚕𝚞𝚏𝚏, 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚖𝚙𝚝 𝚊𝚝 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚘𝚛 𝚒𝚐

“No, go away.” 

“Mrow.”

“Stop it.”

“Mrooow.”

"Go awaaaayy."

"..."

“She likes me more than you, you know.” Satoru says seriously.

Big hazel eyes stared up at him. A fluffy tail swished. There are no thoughts behind those eyes, he observed. Only hunger.

“Yeah, she does.” He said insistently. The tail swished again while he protectively held his bowl closer to his chest. He didn’t care one single bit if he looked ridiculous.

He'd already had to get up from his comfortable spot on the couch when she tried to launch herself at him, dodging her as she followed him around. 

"You look like a gremlin, and it's after midnight, so you definitely aren't getting any." He said seriously, like she was listening at all, let alone understood him.

Satoru wasn’t really a cat person. He didn’t mind them, but preferred the energy and general enthusiasm to see him that dogs had. However, he didn’t have the kind of time to dedicate to being a proper dog owner, and you, as his girlfriend who was actually home the most, loved cats.

He admittedly does like how soft they are and how funny it looks when they sit like a little loaf of bread.

He does not like how they try to steal his ice cream.

“Back off, Latte!” He did not feel ridiculous at all for taking a defensive stance against a 10lb animal.

He lifted the bowl over his head, as if there was even the possibility she could have reached it while he was already standing up. But he’s not stupid. He fights this battle almost every night with varying desserts and she is crafty. 

He’s never owned a cat before, obviously (he didn’t have any pets growing up because he never had time, always training training training), so he wasn’t aware they even ate people food. He definitely didn’t consider that one might overcome their own skittishness for whipcream. 

He gets it though.

“This is mine, as in, for me only. You don’t get any.” He also was not even remotely embarrassed to be arguing seriously with a cat that was stretched up his leg like she was going to climb her way to his dessert.

“Gah! These are expensive, you know.” He gritted out when he felt claws digging into his thigh through the fabric of his pants. 

“Meoow!” 

“Stop looking at me like that! You can’t have it!”

Just as he was considering the pros and cons of shaking his leg to get her off him, you were there, swooping up the silly animal and holding her like a baby. 

“Y’know, you could’ve been eating your ice cream this whole time, instead of trying to convince her to leave you alone,” You say, smiling, “I don’t think even you can get a cat to go away when they don’t want to.”

He made a grumbling sound, not agreeing with you, just turning his back and stuffing his face like a chipmunk. 

You reached around to swipe a finger through the whipcream and he glared over his shoulder at you when you let the cat lick it off your finger.

"...you don't let me do that." He pouted.

You looked at him flatly while your cat tried to squirm out of your arms, "Just hurry up and finish it, goof."

He manically scooped the remains into his mouth, making you laugh when he actually licked the bowl.

“Why don't you ever turn use infinity?” You asked with a raised brow, amused, as he took his dishes to the kitchen.

His mouth opened but no words came out. He blinked. "I have no idea."

he secretly liked the nightly battle. he called it 'bonding.'

[necrotic-nephilim]

Roytim is such a fun crack rarepair for me! Dick’s best friend sleeping with/dating Dick’s baby brother Timmy is 10/10 drama on a more personal note than I’d picture it with Jason. Absolutely no shade I just have always read Dick as being more protective of Tim and Damian.

Do you have any Roytim headcanons to share? <3

oh i LOVE RoyTim on it's own! likely bc i'm just a Tim multishipper and if it fits i ship, but Roy is especially fun via the Dick connection. and i 1000% agree, *especially* pre-Flashpoint, would even argue it's outright canon that Dick is far more protective of Tim and Damian than he ever was with Jason (not out of dislike, but simply bc Dick and Jason were never all that close and the tragedy of losing Jason was losing what could've been, not what he already had) and especially with Jason as Red Hood, Dick holds no particular protective brotherly feelings toward him. it's all Tim and Damian. so you're so right, the drama of RoyTim is just a smidge more upped than of JayRoy and i'd love to share headcanons-

i think it makes for a fun "crush on your older brother's friend" situation. where like. Tim knows it's unrealistic and he has no *actual* intentions to chase it when he's just 15/16 and Roy and Dick are in their twenties, often hanging out around Tim. and Roy is handsome, he's funny, he's similar in personality to ppl Tim has dated (Steph, Kon) so, it's a crush. one that he hides *well* and never makes it Dick or Roy's problem, and one Tim never expects to pan out. he just fantasizes about Roy a little bit and mostly grows out of it by the time he's an adult.

i think more fics need Lian, so i like the idea of them co-parenting Lian. especially if they're both. sort of bad at it. like Roy loves her and he's trying, but he's doing this basically alone and it's not like he has experience. Tim also has no experience. neither of them know what on earth to do. it's a very cute idea that just relies on the two of them being terrible at parenting and Roy getting so mad that the first time Lian says "dada" she says it to Tim that he considers breaking up for a good five minutes.

how they get together can happen in a lot of ways, but i'm interested in the idea of Dick asking Roy to talk to Tim during Tim's Red Robin arc. Roy has experience helping kids through his work helping young addicts and nothing else has worked, so he offers to at least try with Tim. and Roy, who also doesn't handle grief well, understands at least some of what Tim is going through. especially since Roy dealt with Oliver dying and then suddenly coming back, he's at least open to the idea Bruce could be alive. he's just around to try and help Tim keep some emotional stability, but it ends up with Roy helping with the search and somehow, falling for Tim along the way

they go to sitcom levels of chaos trying to keep the relationship hidden from Dick. they *both* know Dick is far too protective of Tim to react well to it. but also, i think Roy would get *just* a bit of an ego about sleeping with Tim under Dick's nose. he makes a point of strutting around when Dick invites him over, finding reasons to be shirtless just to make Tim squirm a little bit. it's that sort of kink where you're excited about the risk of being caught. that fits these two so well and i can't explain it.

because Roy is used to mentoring younger heroes, i think he would have a bigger than normal moral panic about dating Tim. he fights his feelings for a *while*, to the point Tim can tell Roy is fighting his feelings and he's trying to convince Roy he's fine with this. Tim telling Roy about his childhood crush does not help. it makes Roy feel *worse*. it makes them take things very slowly, and i could see Roy being the type to never fully touch Tim until Tim is 18, no matter how much Tim insists it's okay.

i do think they have unhinged sex when they actually get into it though. no matter how sure Roy is that he'll be gentle the first time, the minute he gets his hands on Tim, it is feral. there is blood and foul dirty talk and Tim cannot walk the next day. i think Roy makes for a very mean dom, the type who will make fun of you for being a mess in bed. he just has those vibes, and it works great for getting Tim to just. turn his brain off.

i think Roy, who's struggled with picking hero names before, would be someone to try to force Tim to let go of Red Robin once the whole Bruce thing is over. it's not Tim's name and Tim doesn't need to keep punishing himself with it. Roy is nice about it at first, but then i do think he threatens to set that damn suit on fire if Tim keeps wearing it and doesn't come up with a new hero name. and the worst part is, Tim does know he's serious.

when Dick does find out, chaos. an absolute shitshow. when Roy tells him, Dick punches Roy in the face before he even finishes explaining himself. it's a pure gut reaction. even Bruce isn't as protective over Tim as Dick is. it takes a *lot* of convincing from Tim that it's okay and he wanted this before Dick calms down, and he still doesn't talk to Roy for like a month until the rest of the Titans are forced to hold an intervention reminding Dick of his own dating history with age gaps, like Babs. Dick does cool down, but he is not afraid to stoop to "you're fucking my brother" in an argument bc he wins everytime when he brings it up.

i think Tim is the protective partner. everyone *expects* it to be Roy, he's older and more experienced, but it's Tim who will absolutely lose it if someone threatens Roy's or Lian's life. like not fanonish "committing murder" Tim, but more so canonish "i have a contingency plan for everything" Tim. Roy has had to hold him back a couple times. honestly i think the moral conversations Roy and Tim have are so interesting. because Roy will cross the line for those he loves, so bc of that, Tim is careful to make sure Roy is never in a position where he has to protect Tim bc he knows it would turn lethal quickly. it's a very "i know what you're capable of and you don't scare me but i won't let you become a worse version of yourself bc of me" sort of self preservation vibe. i think it'd be very neat. Tim fights like hell when he's close to death bc his thought is always "i refuse to let Roy feel like he has to avenge me" which i find very crunchy.

[applesaucesims]

One afternoon, when Louis and Dayton were hanging out together in Louis's room, they could barely focus on their games, with the ruckus happening in the room next door. Curious about what was happening, the two of them sneaked down the hallway, where they found the girls' door wide open.

Inside, there was a chest surrounded by all kinds of clothing items, with the girls stood next to it. They were wearing funny hats and dresses to make them look like princesses, and had even attempted putting on their mother's makeup for a more convincing look. However, there was not playing going on. Instead, Ruby and Dorothy were arguing about which of them would be the princess in their game, as apparently there was only room for one. Of course, it could not be a proper fairy tale without the evil stepsister.

Dorothy insisted that she would get to be the princess, since she was the first to say so, but Ruby hated the idea of even just pretending to be evil. Louis knew it was time for him to step in as a big brother and figure out a way to diffuse the argument. Otherwise, they would never actually end up playing their game. He looked around the room, until his eyes rested on the costume chest.

There were more than enough costumes and accessories for all of them to dress up, which meant that the girls could easily both be a princess in this case. Louis would just have to be the stepsister in this case, the answer seemed pretty obvious to him.

The twins jumped excitedly at the idea that they would get to dress up their brother, and the two girls got to work on it quickly. Soon, Louis was sat on the chest in a barely fitting baby blue dress and a matching bonnet, while Dorothy painted his face with lots and lots of makeup. He actually did not mind it, in fact, he almost felt pretty, although he knew his sister was not the most skilled at what she was doing.

Even Dayton, who had simply thrown on a scarf as a makeshift cape and a paper crown, had to admit that the outcome was quite convincing. Had he not known any better, he could have thought Louis was a lost third McGregor sister. Speaking of whom, Dayton put on his smoothest prince voice to flatter the twin girls as best as he could. If he was going to be their prince, he was going to try his best at it, too.

With no music player in the room, the four children made up their own ballroom songs, as they danced around laughing. Dayton even took upon the role of announcing the next dance that would be coming up each time, while the other three came up with songs matching the increasingly absurd themes.

They kept playing for a while, until all of them were too tired to continue, and Dayton had to go home. All arguments were soon forgotten about, but it sure was a princess ball to remember.

[TRANSCRIPT]

Dorothy: "No, we can't both be the princess!"

Dayton: "Sounds like they're in a bit of a pickle, eh?"

Louis: "Let's see what's going on!"

Dorothy: "One of us has to be the evil stepsister!"

Ruby: "But I don't want to be evil, Dottie."

Dorothy: "Well, I chose first!"

*Louis clears throat*

Louis: "Hey, girls! What's the issue?"

Dorothy: "We're playing fairy tale princess ball. But stupid Ruby doesn't wanna be the evil stepsister!"

Dayton: "What's with the bear?"

Dorothy: "Why, that's the beautiful prince, of course!"

Dayton: "Naturally."

Louis: "Hmmm... Maybe I have an idea how we can fix this."

...

Louis: "Are you finished?"

Dorothy: "Hush, art cannot be rushed."

Dorothy: "Aaaand... done!"

Louis: "So? How do I look?"

Dorothy: "You look lovely!"

Dayton: "More like you're ready to meet the wonderful wizard of Oz!"

Louis: "Is it bad?"

Dayton: "I don't know. Dorothy's pretty, too, no? You could make a pretty girl. You know, if your dress actually fit."

Louis: "Oh, thank you, your maaaajesty!"

Dayton: *flutters eyelashes* "Of course, not as pretty as the beautiful princesses I'm meant to meet tonight at the royal ball!"

Ruby & Dorothy: *giggling*

...

*singing incoherently*