#the idea of ​older ice kicking ass and taking names makes my brain happy

[oh-great-authoress]

“Beware of an old man in a profession where men die young.”

So, even when Ice is promoted out of flying full time, he's still going to have to retain his classification as a pilot, at least for a few ranks. To do this, he is going to have to book so many hours in the cockpit a year. Which means that Ice will, most likely, be trained on the Super Hornet when the Navy retires the Tomcat.

What I like to imagine: Ice, in his 40s with at least two stars, attending a flight school refresher to learn the F/A-18, along with mostly young punks. Ice doesn't say anything; he's the ranking officer in the classroom, but he asks the instructors to just sit on that information. The kids think it's funny he's in there, call him Pops, ask him how he's going to keep up with them. Ice doesn't say anything.

They're about to go up for their first more complicated maneuvers, and everyone's suiting up. The instructor passes Ice and a few other students in the hangar, and says, "Hey, go easy on them."

The kids laugh. Say they can't make any promises.

Instructor looks at them over the top of his sunglasses. "I wasn't talking to you."

The military term for what happens next is rapid dominance. None of the kids ever make fun of Ice ever again.

[ourneverendingpossibilities]

BECAUSE ITS VALENTINES, can I please request some angst to fluff for our baby Kise? Like maybe something like Reader thinks he's cheating but learns in the end that he's just planning a surprise for her?? Please? Thank you ILY! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

AHH. Semi Angsty Ki-chan is like... adorable??? I’m glad to write this for you!! Thank you for taking time to request and I hope you have a lovely Valentine’s Day! <3 (If you celebrate!)

____________

Your relationship with Kise is still fairly new... You began dating after Summer ended in your second year.. The holidays were brand new territory because he was your first boyfriend. Everything you experienced as a couple was the first time. 

Your first date. First hug... First kiss..

You were on cloud nine. Despite him being very popular, he wasn’t an egotistical asshole.. Not the stories you’ve heard before in the past. Everything was going well, the two of you communicating on a regular basis. To the point it was getting lonely when you DIDN’T talk to him...

So it never once occurred to you he would be cheating with someone else... Or he would WANT to.

It was the week of Valentine’s Day. The air at Kaijou was filled with lovesick girls pining after their favourite boy. Wanting their attention for only a brief moment..

In this case, most of those girls directed their gazes at Kise.

Because you wanted to keep things as drama-free as possible, you politely asked Kise if he could keep your relationship under the radar, just until you could adjust to the attention you were sure the two of you would receive... He was a kind gentleman, understanding not everyone wants to be known, and he would meet up with you after hours, walk you home in peace and quiet. 

You got to your desk when you’d overheard a few girls gossiping about some pink-haired girl they’d seen with Kise at the mall yesterday.

“She had her arms wrapped around his and she was gushing about how cute he was! He didn’t seem to mind being close with her either!”

“If I was his girlfriend, I don’t think I could handle another woman being on my man’s arms..”

“I feel bad for anyone who has to compete with her!”

You tried not listening in, but all you could try to wrap around your mind was.. Kise had lied to you..

He said he had practice last night... He had to stay late for that.. He never once mentioned needing to meet up with another girl... Much less someone who clings to him that way.. Could you even believe those fangirls anyway?? They always seem to be gossiping about something... They could be trying to get a rise out of everyone..

Start some stupid rumour...

You chose to ignore it the best you could.. But closer to the end of the day, you could feel yourself start to wear thin.. All you could think about was Kise having his arms wrapped around another girl’s... Smiling down at them with that gorgeous smile of his... He was your ray of sunshine... 

You didn’t want to lose him to someone else...

You couldn’t stay to wait for him.. You choose to leave the school grounds, not bothering to attend your afterschool club.. You just needed to process the information you heard..

Okay, don’t panic.. It could be a cousin of his... Or a relative... He DOES have two sisters after all... 

But they were older.. and you’d seen pictures of them.. They didn’t have pink hair.. But that’s still not a reason to overreact... Just stay calm.. 

You managed to leave the school when you were accidentally shoved to the side by a short girl with very long hair. It was a shade of pink, and you were too stunned to be angry at being shoved aside...

“KI-CHAN!”

You didn’t notice the grumbling bluenette who followed behind her, clearly not wanting to be there.. 

“MOMOCCHI!”

As soon as you hear Kise’s voice, you found the strength to walk... Only you didn’t feel the stares of everyone who was staring at you.. You tried to keep a composed face, just until you got past the school gates. As soon as you turned around the corner, your legs bolted. 

You don’t care who sees you, or who’s watching. You just want to reach home, crawl under the blankets and watch some random sappy story while eating your favourite ice cream..

Anywhere but here...

___________

“Oi, Kise! We skipped practice to be here! Where’s your girlfriend?? Feh.. If I was her, I would’ve ditched your ass sooner.”

“DAI-CHAN!”

“She’ll be here!! We always meet here!! Hang on let me call her!” he exclaims, pulling out his cellphone. He finds your contact, dialing it on his phone, but it immediately goes to voice mail.. Odd... You normally answer him...

He tries to dial you a few more times, frowning when he gets the voicemail every single time...

Were you avoiding him??

He places his phone back in his pocket, running a hand through his hair, distress evident on his face... He returns back to the couple, trying to find the words to say..

“She’s not answering... I... I don’t understand... We were just hanging out with each other the other day..”

It’s that moment Momoi pulls out her phone, seeing a message from one of her friends.. It was a picture of the two of them together at the mall.. She looks at Kise, showing him her phone...

“Ki-chan... They may have shown her this... And gotten the wrong idea! You need to fix this!”

“But how?? She’s not even answering my calls..!”

Aomine clicks his tongue, grabbing him by the scruff of his jacket. 

“Oi, dumbass. I know you’re not THAT much of an idiot... When a girl is mad at you, you show up at her house with a surprise, and talk with her.. I shouldn’t have to tell you that!”

He pouts, whining as Aomine drags him to the mall. “OW!! Aominecchi!!”

“I don’t even know what she sees in you.. Having to put up with your fangirls... They’re always trying to start shit... So you better make it up to her.. Or I’ll kick your ass myself!”

He’s startled at his declaration, and he looks between both his friends, before nodding his head.

“I’ll get ____cchi something she’ll never forget!”

_____________

This was stupid.

You should’ve at least texted him to say you weren’t feeling well... Have some sort of cover story.. You hate lying, hate hiding away as if you’re not bothered by anything... When you turned on your phone, you see the photo of Kise with the pinkette, and you try your hardest NOT to cry.. You don’t want to give him that satisfaction!

However, the knock on your bedroom door startles you, and before you could get up to lock it, Kise enters, staring at you with an expression you’ve never seen before...

“R...Ryouta..”

“Why did you ignore me, _____cchi?? You had me worried something happened to you!”

You turn away from him, not noticing him placing a couple bags down at the bed. You couldn’t look him in the eye... Not since.. that picture lingers in your mind.. How happy he sounded when calling ‘her’ name.

“You could’ve met up with her somewhere else... It was foolish to go where everyone can see..”

Your words startle him, and he hesitates to reach his hand out.. But he does anyway, because he’s scared to lose you... And he won’t let you go without a fight...

“You saw the picture.”

“Of course I did!” You hiss, turning to look at him, unaware of the unshed tears in your eyes... “It’s all over everyone’s newsfeeds!! I.. I don’t even know how to react..”

“What do you think, ______cchi..” he begins, sitting on your bed. He grabs your hand, but doesn’t move further. “Tell me.. What’s running through your pretty head?”

You look at him, biting back the colourful words creeping into your brain. Instead, you stare down at his hand, so big and warm, wrapped around yours.

“We communicate with each other, Ryouta... We don’t tell each other lies... We don’t keep secrets...” 

You look at him, before shaking your head. “So if you weren’t happy with me, why didn’t you speak up sooner??”

He gently tugs your hand, bringing you into his lap, resting his head on yours. You try not to blush, glaring at his clothes.. Stupid Kise... He always seems to do this to you....

“I’m the happiest when I’m with _____cchi...” he admits easily, stroking your hair, “I was with my middle school friend Momocchi... She was helping me pick out a gift for Valentine’s Day... I didn’t want to ruin the surprise, so I told you I was staying later to practice.... WHICH I did..” he adds, staring down at you... 

“I asked her and her boyfriend to meet with me after practice.... But when people took that picture, he was in the bathroom.. She left him behind to take me everywhere before the mall closed...”

Your cheeks began to burn at the embarrassment, of being stupid enough to believe such a stupid thing... But instead, you try to remain calm, not wanting to break down in his arms...

“I... Ryouta...”

“The reason they came today was to meet you... Because I wanted to offer going on a double date with them for Valentine’s Day...” he admits, rubbing the back of his head...

“You’re my first REAL girlfriend ______cchi... I wasn’t sure if you wanted to spend it alone, or if you wanted to be with another couple... But trust me when I say...”

He looks at you with softening hues, “You were all I could think about the whole time I was with them...”

And when you see him this raw, this open towards you.... You know he’s telling the truth... And you fell into those stupid rumours like an idiot.. Because you were scared to believe he was happy with you.. You try to hide your face, but he doesn’t let you, grabbing both your hands with one, and uses the other to wipe away the tears...

“I’m sorry you felt this way _____cchi... I.. I should’ve asked you before going to her... Momocchi is one female I can trust with asking relationship advice!” he explains, standing up to grab the bags...

“But listen, I have your favourite ice-cream here, with your favourite movie...” He begins, grabbing the stuffed dog from the bag. He holds it out for you, trying not to fluster at your stare.. “I.. I figured you’d like this... So I grabbed it.. I know we... had a misunderstanding...” a HUGE one... “But, if it’s okay with you.. I’d like for us to start our Valentine’s weekend today...”

He’s startled when you jump at him, wrapping your arms around his neck. You cling to him, and he immediately places the bags down to hold you to his chest. He starts to stroke your hair, whispering soft, reassuring words in your ear, hoping it soothes your insecurities... And he would understand why you have them... 

But he’s determined to make them go away... Because you’re HIS ray of sunshine.. And he needs you to make the bad days go away.

[sippin-on-red-wine]

High Tide | Chapter 7: Please

Title: High Tide, Chapter 7 | Please Author: @sippin-on-red-wine Rating: NO SMUTS IN THIS CHAPTER SORRRYYYYY Characters: Ed Sheeran x Kendra (original female character) Word Count:  3,225 Author’s Note: Sorry in advance again?

I refused to cry, blinking back the hot tears as the taxi pulled away from the curb. I knew I shouldn't, but I looked back at Ed, standing there on the sidewalk, looking broken.

I'm the one that should look broken.

“Where to, miss?”

Shit. I don't know, Mr. Taxi Driver, can't you tell I've just been burned by my international superstar boyfriend and I'm in a country that's not my own and I have nowhere and no one to run to?

“Do you have any hotel recommendations?”

“Sure, plenty. Are you looking for something reasonable, or ritzy?”

“Ritzy, please.”

“Right away then, miss.”

My brain kicked into logistical-detail mode.

Okay, first step, check into a hotel. I have literally nothing with me apart from my little purse which thankfully has my wallet. No fucking way am I going back to Ed’s just to get a suitcase of clothing. I'll just buy some things to tide me over….. tide me over til when? Should I fly home?

The thought of leaving London like this made me shudder. The last few days had been crazy wonderful. How did it all fall to pieces so quickly? Stop.

My phone was vibrating in my little purse. I flipped it over to check -- Lauren was calling. I hit ignore. She called again - ignore. After rejecting her third call, I felt a bit guilty, she probably was worried. I tapped out a quick response:

*Lo, I'm OK, I just need some space. Please.

My phone immediately started buzzing again, and I just got pissed and turned the damn thing off.

I pushed all the worries and questions down, focusing on getting a room somewhere and checking in.

The driver pulled up to a large high-rise building and I handed him a bank note from my purse before spilling out in front of the hotel's main entrance.

I approached the reception desk, suddenly very aware that my dress was probably too tight and short for a place like this.

“Hello, how may I assist you?” The man was young, and dressed in a black suit.

“Do you have any rooms available tonight, please?”

“Sure ma’am. Will one bed suffice?”

I nodded my head. He went to work, clicking and typing in the hotel’s computer system.

“Ahh, we've got a lovely King-sized room with a view of the city. Would you like to reserve it?”

“Yes, please.” City view sounds nice. I mean, I'm in London for the first time, may as well wallow in my self pity in style -- “Wait. Do you have anything larger….. like a suite?”

It turns out, he did. Several options, actually. He pulled out a brochure that included a few photos and highlighted the amenities of each. Oh, and the price per night, which made my eyes bulge out of my head a bit.

I handed over my AmEx card, silently glossing over the dollar figure he had given me for the week’s stay. It didn't matter, really, but it was much more than I was used to paying. Fuck it.

And so he handed me a key card, and I walked unsteadily in my heels over to the Elevator, where they had an actual attendant stationed. He was dressed in a full bell-hop type uniform, an older gentleman with kind eyes.

“Hello, what floor, please?” He asked, ushering me into the lift.

“Penthouse, please.”

I handed him the special key I had gotten at reception, the attendant inserted it in the wall panel and I watched as the “P” button lit up, and we were on our way.

“My name is Thomas, I'm happy to assist you with any needs you may have during your stay.”

His laugh lines were deep-set in his face. I found myself picturing him at home, smiling and adoring his family, maybe bouncing a grandchild on his lap.

I felt my eyes welling up again. Lock it up, K.

“Is there anything I can help you with, miss?”

“Um… actually, yes? Maybe? I wasn't really anticipating my stay, and so I don't have any of my things… is there, by chance, someone who could run out and pick up a few necessities for me?”

“Oh, yes, miss. We've got a concierge service who can handle just about any request you could throw their way. Just give the front desk a ring and they will be happy to assist.”

I sighed a breath of relief. I desperately wanted some leggings and a soft t-shirt, and hadn't been looking forward to going out shopping, bright and early tomorrow morning, dressed in my club clothes.

“Thomas, thank you so much.”

The elevator Ping!'d and Thomas turned the key once more before removing and returning it to me.

“My pleasure, miss. Please do not hesitate to ask, should you be needing anything else. Have a lovely evening.”

I walked out of the elevator into the foyer of my new suite. It was… stunning. Opulent. Beautiful. I was at a loss for words.

It was a large and sprawling suite, with a full kitchen, living room, a balcony, and at least two bedrooms. There was a beautiful wrought iron spiral staircase over in the corner of the lounge area. I kicked off my stupid shoes and dropped my purse on the dining room table, below an ornate glass chandelier. My toes sunk into the cream colored carpeting as I wandered around the suite, peeking in doors. The master bedroom was grand, all done up in beiges and golds and rich accent colors. There was a desk in the master, with a phone that I used to ring the concierge as Thomas had suggested.

I requested a pair of black leggings, a black tee shirt, white sneakers, and a long trench-style lined coat, as well as a toothbrush and a charger cable for my cell phone. The nice lady on the phone assured me they could get all that to me very soon, and that the charges would just be added to my room. I thanked her and almost said goodbye before deciding to order three bottles of champagne, too.

I sighed as I placed the phone back into it's little receiver cradle. Now what.

I strode over to the En Suite, finding a rather plush bathrobe hung on the wall for the taking. I shucked out of my ensemble and slipped into the rich navy blue robe, feeling a bit more at ease. I washed the makeup from my face, wishing I had a hair tie handy. Should make a list of things to pick up tomorrow.

Or maybe you should just go home tomorrow.

The elevator rung out, alerting me that someone was arriving. The doors opened and a younger-looking girl stepped out with a shiny silver cart, with a large ice bucket holding the booze I had requested. I thanked her and she was gone just as quickly as she had came.

Need alcohol. I cut the foil and popped the cork on one of the bottles, plucking one of the flutes from the tray, the second glass staying put. 

I crept over to the large brocade sofa and plunked down right in the center reaching for the television remote. It was official, I was out of things to do. Which is precisely when my brain thought it would be a good idea to re-live the past couple of hours.

My eyes were hot and stinging with tears, but I pushed them back. I am not going to cry. I am fine. I am a grown ass woman. I'll be okay.

But goddamnit, why? I had found my station in life, content with being alone as long as that meant I would never be deceived by a loved one. And then, him.

I should have known. He had only recently broken up with her when he turned up next door. I thought back to the day that I had driven his friends to the airport, going over to Ed's the next afternoon to find him drinking and chain-smoking himself into oblivion. He was broken. And it wasn't your job to fix him so why did you even try?

Just then, I remembered that I had turned my phone off. I was sure there were texts or voicemails waiting for me, and so I gulped down the rest of my champagne and retrieved my cell from my little purse, powering it on.

The messages came in one after the next after the next. A whole slew of texts and missed calls from Lauren popped up:

- Missed Call

*Kendra, where are you??

- Missed Call - Missed Call - Missed Call

*Please answer

- Missed Call Voice Message (1:03) - Missed Call

*Ed is having a fit, Kenn, please, just hear him out

- Missed Call - Voice Message (1:16)

*Okay, I get it. Will you please call me tomorrow? I'm worried about you xx

I clicked on the first voice message, setting it to speakerphone. It was Lauren, rambling about what a “fucking idiot” Ed was and how “bloody worried” she was and offering her guest bed up for me and “PLEASE pick up, Kendra.” It was loud in the background, like she was still at the club, or standing right outside of it, the bass thumping through the phone.

The next voicemail had less chaos going on in the background. “Kendra -- please,” Lauren's voice was pleading on the other end. And then, the sound of Ed’s voice “Lauren, let me --” garble garble garble.

“Kenny, I fucked up, I’m so--”

His voice rang out through the speaker like a shot straight to my heart. I quickly ended the message, not wanting to hear him anymore. Hearing that silly nickname that was just for him and no one else, it was.. unbearable.

Just then my phone rang yet again - a number I didn’t have stored this time. I turned off the t.v., shut off my cell, and went and climbed in the huge bed, feeling utterly alone, and waited for sleep to take me.

Ed…….

I watched her, in the back of the cab, drive away. It was almost like an out-of-body experience. Every nerve, every CELL in my being told me to run after her, to scream, to fight, to not take ‘No’ for an answer. But I was just… stuck. Frozen. I couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think.

I kept my eyes trained on the taillights of that cab until it was impossible to see anymore. I heard my name, over and over again, but it sounded distant - like I was underwater and they were shouting from up on the diving board.

Lauren. It was Lauren. She was shaking my shoulders, trying to get me to snap to it. “Ed! Come ON, we have to get you back inside! Paps…”

Whothefuckcares--

But she gave me one good yank and I followed her back inside the club, all the blood rushing back to my head.

“Christ, Ed, why didn’t you tell her Poppy was going to be here?”

“Call her.” It wasn't a question.

“What?”

“Call her!” I was practically shouting. I winced, realizing how I sounded. “Please, Lauren. Call her. I don't know where she's gone.”

Lauren pulled out her phone and scrolled through her contacts, til she found her name. She set it to speaker, we could barely hear over all the commotion in the club but when it went to voicemail, I wasn't surprised that she didn't answer.

Lauren tapped away furiously at her phone screen, texting her.

“Jesus fuck, Ed, what happened?”

“I fucked up, Lauren. Can you please ring her again?”

Lauren called her three more times. I kept willing her to pick up on the other end, but she didn't.

“She texted--” Lauren threw her phone to me and I quickly scrambled to open the message.

*Lo, I'm OK, I just need some space. Please.

The tears were back, hot and spilling out from my eyelids despite my valiant effort to keep them in. I clicked into the text, bringing up her Contact info and with it, a silly picture of her and Lauren from the day Kendra had taken us out whale watching. It had been the very end of Summer, then. Her skin was tanned, her face sprinkled with freckles. She was wearing a white linen top, and my aviators -- I offered them to her when her shades had fallen and been stepped on. That had been one of the best days I had had in weeks, months maybe.

Seeing her face in the photo, silly, with her tongue sticking out and a peace symbol thrown up next to her head -- it absolutely gutted me.

What have you done?

I clicked the little telephone icon, ringing her again. Straight to voicemail this time.

My stomach was hot and sour as I raced to type out a message to her: Please answer.

“Ed, she said she's okay. Why don't I take you home, c’mon, there's nothing you can do from here.” I couldn't meet her eyes, but I nodded and handed the phone back to her.

Lauren grabbed me by the hand and dragged me back through the club, toward the back exit where Kendra and I had come in. She pushed the doors open and the cool night air flooded my lungs.

I felt numb. My mind racing, where is she? Will she come back? Is she safe?

I thought back to the night when she had told me about her past, how she had just up & left everything, not even saying goodbye. Will she do that again?

I braced myself on the stone exterior wall of the club, both hands out as I retched onto the ground between my feet.

“Christ, Ed.” Lauren was there, patting my back as I emptied the contents of my stomach, which was mostly booze.

A few moments passed while I collected myself, and Lauren pulled me into the car that was waiting there for me.

The ride home felt like an eternity. Lauren sat in silence beside me, her hand resting lightly on my knee. The lamplights blurred together, the whir of London at night dulled by the knot in my chest.

“Ed,” she spoke softly. “You gotta clue me in here, what the hell happened?”

“I… she didn't know Poppy was going to be there.”

“And?” She pushed.

“I was stupid, I wanted to look… good, in front of her.”

“Okay, well that seems pretty normal?”

“I… didn't tell her that Poppy would likely be at the party. And I… kind of, got a little handsy with Kendra after I noticed she had gotten there. And her fucking dress, I pushed that dress on her even though she didn't seem comfortable in it, it just looked so goddamn good on her and…”

“Oh, Ed.”

“I came out of the bathroom and I just saw her from the back, stalking down the stairs like a bat out of hell. Did Poppy say something to her? Did you see?”

“No, no, I don't think so. I had just gotten there and your lovely Ex was staring daggers at Kendra, and I, um, mentioned her…. She was definitely taken aback.”

“She's going to hate me.”

“Ed, I'm sure it will be OK.”

“You didn't hear the things she said to me outside. I used her, Lauren, I'm fucking selfish and childish and I fucked it up.”

“Hey. Take a breath. We’ll get her, alright?”

“Will you call her again?”

She granted my request, though we both knew it was hopeless at this point. Her voicemail message rang out of the speaker phone as Lauren inhaled, mentally preparing some new desperate plea designed to get Kendra to pick up the phone.

Kendra -- please,” She started, but I just couldn't listen to her ask, no, beg, on my behalf again.

“Lauren, let me --” I reached out for the phone, pulling it up to my face. “Kenny, I fucked up, I’m so sorry. I don't deserve it but please, please, just call me. I can't.. I didn't..” I struggled for the right words. “This is real, US, everything - it's all real, it's not… you must think… fuck, just, PLEASE, answer? I need to know you're okay.”

Kendra……

I woke the next day, feeling surprised that I had slept so soundly. I wouldn't say well.

I hadn't had any actual dreams, per se, but I just had this haunting feeling like I had re-lived the previous night over and over, unable to wake, stuck in that reality.

I yawned and stretched out in the massive bed, safe under the cover of the fluffy white comforter.

But the safety of the comforter couldn't protect against my own thoughts.

Alright, Kendra. Time to get up and figure out what you're doing.

I threw the covers back and got up out of bed, re-tying the knot in my robe. That reminds me….

I walked out into the main living space of my Penthouse Fucking Suite and saw a neat little stack of packages near the door. It felt a little… odd, picturing a young concierge clerk running out to the shops and choosing the things from my list. But I was more than appreciative to not have to get back in my dress and heels.

I grabbed up the boxes and bags, setting them on the chic metal & glass dining table, extracting all the things I had asked for. I unraveled the cord of the cell phone charger and plugged my phone in to charge up. I pulled the tags off of the few basic clothing items, then dressed myself in the tight black leggings and v-neck tee.

I powered up my cellphone and watched another slew of missed calls register on the screen, the last one had been a little past 4AM, from the number I didn't have saved in my contacts.

And a single text from that same number.

*K, you deserve so much better than me. But I can't let you go. Please x

And suddenly, those tears I had been battling all broke loose, rushing fast and hot down the front of my cheeks.

Did I overreact? Okay, so he wanted to make his ex jealous, I'd be lying if I said I'd never tried especially hard to look good in front of an Ex.

I shrugged off the bathrobe and tugged on the tight black leggings. They were the size I asked for, but European sizes must be a bit less… generous, because man those suckers were tight. I struggled to pull them up over my ass… which only reminded me of Ed being grabby the night before. He was very affectionate, but this had been different. And now that I knew his Ex had been sat there, ten feet away and facing right toward us, all you could see was the smug smile on his face which I had, at the time, interpreted to be happiness or horniness or tipsiness. But now I knew, it wasn’t any of those. It was Look What I Got.

The tears dried up and I buckled down on my resolve. Be honest with yourself. This, plus him wanting to sell his gorgeous fucking house, because it reminds him of her?

He's not over her.

It was time to go home.

Thank you for reading !!!!!!! And not killing me !!!!!!!!!

[therainroguefanfiction]

🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 041 [The Bakugo Family]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Word Count: 2,984

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

〈“So raise your glass if you are wrong in all the right ways. All my underdogs, we will never be never be anything but loud. And nitty-gritty, dirty little freaks, won’t you come on and raise your glass.” P!nk, “Raise Your Glass”〉

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

Momo glanced at me with a nervous smile as we walked down the hallway. “Do you know what agency you’re gonna choose?”

I went to reply but stopped myself. If I tell her that I don’t know any of these heroes, it might raise too many questions that I’m too lazy to make up lies to. “Not a fucking clue. What about you?”

“I’m thinking about choosing Uwabami. She sent me an offer.”

“She sounds like a fucking thot, but ‘kay.”

She chuckled. “You always speak your mind. I like that about you.”

“Most people hate it. Just ask Aizawa.”

“Do you mind… if I call you Jen?”

“Eh?” I looked at her in surprise. Why is she askin’ me that? It’s not like I asked her if I could use her first name. I just did it because her last name gives me a fucking headache.

“S-Sorry!” She apologized, waving her hands frantically. “It’s totally okay if you don’t want me to!”

“I don’t mind. I was just surprised you asked.”

“Oh, I see!” Her face brightened and she clapped her hands together. “Thank you!” I don’t really get why it made her so happy, but I sent her a smile, listening to her talk about various things as we made our way into the cafeteria to get our food before sitting down at a deserted table near the center of the room. “I’m planning on going shopping this weekend, would you like to come with me?”

“Ew,” My nose wrinkled as I stabbed a chicken nugget with my fork. Yes, I am a literal child. “I hate shopping. Especially for clothes.”

Her smile faltered, a bead of sweat rolling down her cheek. “A-Ah, I thought so, but I wanted to ask. What do you like, then? We’ve been classmates for a while, but… I don’t really know anything about you.”

“Tacos,” I responded instantly.

“That’s the one thing I definitely know,” she laughed. “Other than tacos?”

I scratched my cheek thoughtfully. What do I like? “Let’s see… Dr. Pepper is pretty dope. Cats are adorable as fuck. Video Games are fun, especially racing games. And, uhh… that’s it, I guess.”

She frowned, cupping her chin. “That’s not much to work with… I suppose I could ask father to turn guest room G into a gaming room.”

My eye twitched, the chicken nugget falling from my fork. Oh, honey, no no no. Momo, don’t tell me… you’re a rich bitch?! Well, I guess she doesn’t really act like one, though. At least I don’t get any Regina George vibes from her. Oh wait, maybe that’s why Reggian is so bitchy because his name is Regina. Heh, get rekt.

Momo continued to ramble on, clearly excited about the idea of a new project where she gets to design a gaming room. She also mentioned something about a cat cafe, but she was back to the game room before I could interject my thoughts. Well, as long as she’s happy, I guess.

Bzzt. Bzzt.

Hmm? Who the fuck would be texting me right now? If Toshi or Zawa needed something, they know where I am. Maybe it’s that lazy ass Katsuki. Oh, no, he’s on the other side of the room yelling at Kirishima about something. Curious, I pulled the phone from my pocket, holding it under the table so I didn’t offend Momo. It was a new message from an unknown number. I wonder how wrong this can go.

✉ ‘If you want to learn the truth about your mother, choose Caraphernelia’s Hero Agency.’

My eyes narrowed. Because that’s not suspicious as fuck is it? I replied, ‘Who tf is this?’

✉ ‘I’m an old friend of your mother :)’

I scoffed quietly. This has to be a prank, right? It doesn’t seem like something Tosh or Zawa would do though, and Katsuki is the only other one that knows about my mom…

✉ ‘I can tell you all of her deepest, darkest secrets, one even All Might doesn’t know~ After all, some things a girl can only tell to her female friends, you know?’

✉ ‘You do want to learn about your mother and who you are… right?’

“Jen, is something wrong? You look kind of pale…” Momo frowned, reaching her hand out for my forehead. “You don’t have a fever,”

“Ah, yeah…” A bead of sweat rolled down my cheek as I stood up, clearing my throat. “I’m feeling a bit, uhh, closed in so I’m gonna get some fresh air.”

“Do you want me to accompany you?”

“Nah, don’t worry about it. Finish eating, I’ll see ya in a bit.” I smiled, patting her shoulder before dumping my tray and heading from the room. Man~ what the fuck is with this shit? I don’t have the mental capacity to make my own decisions. Pretty sure I proved that multiple times in my life.

Like that one time when a rat got into my house when I was a kid. The neighbor’s cat followed it inside, still have no fucking idea how, and it had the poor thing cornered. Now, being an animal sympathizer, naturally my dumbass picked it up barehanded and got the shit bit out of my hand. Blood everywhere. Gramps was not happy.

Then there was the whole code name picking thing. That didn’t go over too well, but it’s not my fucking fault. Decisions are hard.

I rubbed my head in frustration. I do want to know more about my mom, though. I feel like… it’ll give me some closure or some shit. Right now, it kinda feels like the puzzle of my life up to this point is missing some pieces that can only be filled in with more info about her. What if this bitch actually knows why my mom decided to become a hero? What about my dad? Does this bitch have any idea who he might be?

I knew I would regret this, but before my brain could question my idiotic decision, I typed my reply, ‘I’ll do it.’

The dots appeared on the screen, indicating that a message was being typed. A minute passed by. Two. Five. My eye twitched. If this bitch don’t –

✉ ‘Is a burger a salad? What about cereal, is it a soup? Is cake really just a lasagna?’

What the fuck kinda drugs is this bitch taking?! This is why you don’t lick mushrooms, kids. Or frogs. Please don’t lick frogs.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“Oi, tiger.”

I glanced over my shoulder, pausing just outside the school gate. “Yo, Katsuki~”

He didn’t stop walking, his shoulder bumping into mine as he passed by. “You’re coming over for dinner tonight.”

“Pretty sure I’m not,” I stuffed my hands into my pockets as I followed after him. “Pops says I’m not allowed to eat at stranger’s houses anymore.”

He ignored me, a scowl on his face. “My old hag won’t stop bitching at me about meeting you. I mentioned you one fucking time when you cheated at Needy Speedy and she won’t let it the fuck go.”

“I did not cheat, you just suck,” I responded. “And that honestly sounds like a you problem, so~ good luck with that.”

“My dad is making you tac -”

“Why the fuck didn’t you start with that, bro?” I threw my arm around his shoulder with a grin, feeling my stomach growling at the thought.

“You’re fucking pathetic,” he deadpanned.

“Oh? Are we stating the obvious now? I love that game! My turn – you’re part chihuahua.”

“I’m not a fucking dog, you bitch!!”

I winched, pulling away and rubbing my poor ear. “I think my ear is bleeding…”

“Good!”

“You’re paying for my medical bills, chief.”

“Like hell I am! Go to hell!”

“I visit hell every summer. It’s a bit too warm for my tastes, but the people are pleasant.”

Katsuki groaned, slamming his hand to his face. “I hate you so goddamn much.”

“Love you, too, buddy.”

“Do not say that around my old hag! She’ll get the wrong idea!”

“Sure, sure.”

We finally arrived at his house and stepped inside, kicking our shoes off inside the doorway. Within seconds, a woman’s voice echoed throughout the house, sounding quite angry. “Damn it, Katsuki!! I told you to clean your room before you left for school this morning!” A woman rounded the corner and I swear on Wade Wilson, this woman looked like someone copy and pasted Katsuki but made him older and gave him tits. “Your teacher also called and told me that you didn’t choose a hero name yet! Knowing you, you probably chose something stupid and it got rejected!”

“Hah?! It wasn’t stupid, it was fucking brilliant!”

“Don’t you raise your voi -! Oh, hello.” Her voice immediately softened when her vermillion eyes landed on me, a bright smile replacing the annoyed expression. “I never thought I’d live to see the day my idiot son brought a friend home!” She clapped her hands together.

“I only brought her because you wouldn’t stop bitching about it!”

She grabbed the top of his head and forcefully shoved him down. “Don’t be rude! Introduce us!”

“You have mouths, don’t cha? Introduce your damn self, you hag!”

I laughed. Bro, watching these two go at it is like watching a pomeranian and a chihuahua barking at each other and slapping their paws on the ground! This is comedy feckin’ gold right here. I should film this… I can’t believe Katsuki is such a momma’s boy. This is perfect fucking blackmail, yo. “I’m Jen Winchester, Katsuki’s classmate, and best friend. I’m also the one that always beats him at video games.”

“You don’t beat me at shit!” He snapped angrily. “And don’t go declaring yourself my best friend, dumbass!”

Her eyes shined brightly. “It’s so nice to meet you, my name is Mitsuki Bakugo, Katsuki’s mother. Please come in, make yourself at home!”

I followed her into the living room, setting my bag down on the floor in front of the couch before sitting down. There were two brown couches facing each other, with a coffee table between them. Reminds me of the lounges at school.

“Do you drink tea?”

Katsuki scoffed, falling onto the couch across from me. “This dumbass only drinks cold tea.”

“Stop being rude, you little shit!” She snapped angrily before smiling at me. “I’ll bring you some iced tea, then!”

I waited until she was out of sight before turning to the blonde with a grin. “Your mom is cool as fuck.”

His eyes narrowed. “Do not tell her that, her head is big enough as it is.”

“Pretty sure that’s you, but okay.”

She returned a few moments later holding a tray in one hand and a large book in the other. Setting the tray down on the table, she set a glass of iced tea in front of me before giving herself and her son a cup of steaming tea. She settled down beside me, the navy blue book on her lap. The words ‘Photo Album’ was printed in gold, bold lettering in the top right corner.

Katsuki groaned at the sight of it. “Why the fuck are you like this?!”

“Because I’m your mother! It’s my job as a parent to embarrass my son.” She chirped happily before opening the book. “It’s nice to finally have someone to show these to!”

The first two pages contained pictures of her at the hospital, looking tired and sweaty, her skin glowing as she looked down at the newborn baby in her arms with a proud look on her face.

“Even as a newborn, he had a shitty look on his face.” She informed me with a smile. “The nurse was worried that we had given him a lemon!”

I laughed at that. “Gotta hand it to ’em, he’s consistent if nothing else.”

“That’s true!” She continued to flip through the pages, showing me pictures from his first few years of life. Pictures of him in the sandbox, him at the beach, him wearing an All Might onesie – oh my fucking god that’s adorable. I noticed a couple pictures of him and Izuku, but I chose not to comment on them.

My eyes fell on one image in particular. It was him and Zuku in the park playing soccer together. They looked around three or four years old and they looked… happy together. My brow furrowed as I took in their innocent expressions. From this picture, they look like they were pretty good friends back then. I know people grow apart, but… is it really that simple? I know Zuku still cares about Katsuki, but does he feel the same way somewhere deep down?

“This one was taken the day his quirk manifested. He started to act so smugly after that.” She pointed to a picture of Katsuki standing outside his preschool, small explosions appearing in his palm. He definitely looked smug in that picture. “Oh and look at this one! He had just gotten this All Might figure and bath bomb and he wanted to try them out. So cute, don’t you think?”

“D-Don’t fucking show her that!” Katsuki jumped up, throwing his hands over the page, his cheeks and ears turning red.

She scowled at him. “And why not? A best friend should know these things!”

“S-She’s not my best friend, you damn hag!”

“You’re going to hurt her feelings! Apologize!”

“I’d rather die!”

“That can be arranged!!”

I watched them argue back and forth, sipping my tea in amusement. The front door opened and closed, followed by a soft-spoken male voice, “I’m back.” A kind-looking man with spikey brown hair and eyes framed by black, square glasses stepped into the living room, several plastic bags in his hands.

Mitsuki smiled brightly, setting the album on the table before approaching him and taking the bags from his left hand. “This is my husband, Masaru.”

“Nice to meet you,” he smiled, rubbing his free hand on his jeans before holding it out to me.

I stood up, slipping my hand into his. “You, too. My name’s Jen Winchester, Katsuki’s classmate.”

Katsuki’s vermillion eyes snapped to me and narrowed, but he remained quiet, now sitting on top of the photo album.

“You’re staying for dinner, right?” Masaru questioned softly. “Katsuki said you love tacos, so we’ll be having them for dinner.”

I instantly nodded with a wide grin. “Yes, thank you for having me!”

He chuckled, sending me a closed-eye smile before following his wife into the kitchen.

Katsuki’s still glaring at me. “What did I do this time?”

He grunted, folding his arms over his chest. “You didn’t introduce yourself as my best friend, idiot.”

“Oh, you’re right. Lemme fix that,” I started toward the kitchen but he grabbed the back of my shirt and yanked me backward with a groan.

“Get your fucking bag, we’re going upstairs before she gets the second album.”

“There’s a second album?”

“There’s ten…”

“Oh lawd,” I did as he asked, following him up the stairs and into his room, which was pretty basic surprisingly. A double bed sat against the back wall under the window, while a desk sat against the left wall, holding some books and a laptop. Various weights and dumbells littered the floor on the right, and several pieces of dirty clothes were scattered across the room. “Katsuki, why is there a sock on the ceiling fan?”

“I threw it at the old hag and it missed.”

“Guess it’s a good thing you don’t play basketball, huh.”

“Fuck off.”

Directly to the right of the door was a flat-screen TV with a gaming system and a stack of games that were tilted slightly to the left. In the center of the room was a low, square table.

“It’s actually not as messy as I figured it would be,” I commented, plopping down onto his bed and grabbing the remote off the bedside table.

He rolled his eyes, flopping down at the table with his back to the bed. “Did you choose yet?”

I paused my channel flipping, glancing at him as he looked over his offers. “Actually, yeah.” Pulling my phone from my pocket, I pulled up the messages and rested the device on his shoulder.

He was quiet as he read them, but then his face twisted into a scowl. “You’re such a dumbass. You’re not fucking choosing this bitch, it’s obvious it’s a scam.”

“I mean, probably.” I scratched my cheek, ignoring his look. “But if there’s a small chance it’s not, I can finally get answers, ya know?”

“Or you could fucking die.”

I grinned, leaning forward to poke his cheek. “D’aww, does Katsuki care about me~?”

He smacked my hand away and turned his head, but the tips of his ears were turning pink. “As if! I don’t give a fuck what you do!”

“What about you? Who are you choosing?” I hummed.

“The number four hero, Best Jeanist.” He grinned. “I’m gonna use him to reach the top!”

“Best Jeanist? The fuck is wrong with you people and your shitty hero names?”

His eyes narrowed. “My fucking names were great!”

I chuckled, raising the remote again only to pause as something caught my attention. I upped the volume on the TV and the news anchor’s voice filled the room, “Just a few days earlier, pro hero Ingenium was left mortally wounded after facing off against the infamous hero killer in Hosu city. To date, the hero killer has killed seventeen pro heroes and left twenty-three hurt beyond recovery. His current whereabouts are unknown, but police are -”

I muted the TV, swallowing hard. “O-Oi, ain’t Ingenium Iida’s older brother?”

“Yeah…” he breathed out, his wide eyes meeting mine.

“The hero killer… Stain…”

“He’s the one that killed your mom, didn’t he?”

“That’s what I was told, yeah.” I muttered. “This explains why Iida’s been acting so fucking weird. I think Izuku is right to be worried…”

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

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[redhawke-bluewizard]

So I just finished watching Fate/Stay Night: Unlimited Bladeworks

and oh boy do I have a lot to say about it. In fact, I kept Tumblr open the entire watchthrough and sent a stream of real-time commentary to @fragrantricepaddy. Since I know a few others who will want to hear my thoughts, I’m going ahead and making a big post about it. Commentary is below the cut-off. SPOILERS AHEAD

SEASON 1

I'm loving it so far: -90% Shiro, +200% Rin.

Rin's first Command was probably the single best use of a command seal I've seen in Type Moon so far

Rin and Archer's banter gives me life

So, there was a problem with Archer's summoning, and Rin says she'll "figure out what to do about it later". Judging from previous Type-Moon, that means a magic ritual involving Rin and Archer f**king, right?

they keep showing the same shot of the Tohsaka manor, and the laziness in that regard is really bothering me

somebody get Sakura a teddy bear. she looks dead inside

the whole "Servants consume minds and souls" thing makes Type-Moon magic sound even more Lovecraftian. adding it to the evidence list

Rin's faith in Archer is just... I can't even... "Handle the landing", goddamn iconic

hmm, that was a suspiciously aggressive first action by Saber.

wtf was Sakura doing meeting with Gilgamesh in the middle of the night

man, Shiro just served Shinji with a smile. Unlimited Blades is characterized by +300% sass

every single highway shot is giving me Berserker flashba- oh this is actually that scene

The teacher character has many virtues, one of which is being an age-appropriate crush. More importantly, I don't think I've ever seen a more relatable character in all of anime

omg Shiro's nickname is Brownie that's adorable

Saber: "My sword will be at your side" Shiro: "Wait" Saber: *immediately runs off*

SHE ACTUALLY CALLED HIM A HACK

Plot twist: Shiro is the tsundere

The huge chest-window on Saber's outfit never bothered me this much before

"Tohsaka, what kind of person is this priest?" "An asshole" ~Rin, probably

"The status of master cannot be given to another" and other lies he tells for filthy karma

"It's a fight to the death" "Oh Kirei shut up!" get him girl

"So then, are you all done chatting?" I fucking snorted XD

Saber's looking at Illya, and I still can't figure out if she's lacking memories in this series.

Rin just Ice Caged that motherf**ker

Shirou's having his existential crisis

Kirei seems thrilled that Shirou's participating, but after Kiritsugu, it really seems like a downgrade as far as rivals go. His standards must have really slipped over the years.

Rin just tried to fuckin end Illya. cold.

Anime gets +2 points for Shirou NOT falling on Rin's chest when they bump into each other. Another +2 points for Rin putting him in a hold anyway.

The dialogue contains a lot of sexual subtext. Terms like consent and intercourse are thrown about in reference to Master-Servant and Servant-Servant interactions. What's your game, Type-Moon...

I see your resurrection and raise you a DRILL ARROW

"I never should have introduced Archer to Gurren Lagann" ~Rin, probably

Everybody in this show has daddy issues

I feel like they got a different writer for Shirou's dialogue than they did for every other character in this show - and they paid Shirou's writer a lot less money

Oh my god, you're having breakfast with a lovely Heroic Spirit, stop making discoveries about Rin

Ms. Fujime seemed to have the strongest objections, but she's going to be single-handedly responsible for the harem aspect of this anime.

Rin, why are you surprised to see him at school? You both go here.

So, Aioko goes missing, and they're all like "She was last seen with Shinji, but no one can find him." Doesn't that mean that they should be worrying about two missing students? There was a nearby murder. Why is Shinji under immediate suspicion?

Man, Rin's aim sure sucks.

I appreciate her class in not just smashing the door down and smoking him out instead.

There's something about magical inheritance that I'm not quite getting. It's been established that only one child can inherit family magic, but it's unclear why. One possibility is that the magic can only be physically held by one person at a time. As such, all a parent can do is teach their kid and do some kind of preparation that makes the magic pass to them upon their own death. However, that doesn't explain why Rin and Sakura were seperated in Fate/Zero. That seems to be entirely political. The impression there was that other families would not allow the Tohsakas to have two mage children, which indicates that multiple kids CAN be trained in the family magic. In that case, the restriction to only one child is probably to prevent families from raising small armies of child soldier-mages.

Shiro to Rin: "I know I'm not a mage" Shiro to Archer: "Fuck you, I'm a mage"

Saber: "You gave me your word that you would return before sunset" Shiro: "Well I also told you I'd summon you if I was in danger, but I didn't do that either" Saber: "..." Shiro: "YOLO"

Shinji: "Don't throw around false accusations" Shirou: "Oh no, you're doing a swell job of making everyone suspect you without my help"

Shirou knows Detect Secret Doors, Jon must be so happy

Oh no, Caster's seen Inuyasha

"So within these walls, you are able to mimic true magic" Caster Servants can't use true magic?!

Is Shiro the only one that seems concerned at Shinji's mental breakdown and maniacal laughter?

Man, Shiro just turned on the sass for Rin with NO MERCY

Wait, she scolded him so fiercely for going to school without Saber, and then she leaves Archer just so she can have some alone time with her new beau.

I can't believe that Shiro just "but no funny business"d Saber

Goddamn Shinji is such a little shit

My assumption is that Shinji didn't get the Mato magic because it's Sakura's by right of inheritance.

Rin's voice acting just got 50% more moe

And we interrupt this Holy Grail War for some boyxboy fanservice.

"You already checked him out?" "I sure did." The audience: He sure did.

"The heart of a mage chooses results over ideals" That sounds important - adding it to the list

Shiro, there comes a time in every young man's life when he experiences 'sword envy'...

I fucking KNOW Caster's voice actress, but pride prevents me from Googling it. Jesse?

Goddamn Saber needs to get a shield. She keeps injuring her left arm.

Shirou seems to be learning more from his enemies than from his allies.

You can tell the Matous are on the decline because their rapey bug-room has much fewer magic rape-beetles than normal.

Command seal seems to be a bit of a misnomer, considering we've seen them used as power sources for other magic. They're really just minor plot devices. I bet you could just use them to reconnect Saber and Shirou's link so she could get mana from him.

Jeez, I think the magic circuit overload must have fried a few of Shirou's brain cells. He's certainly slow on the uptake this morning.

"Oh to be young and in love!" shut up Fujimora, you're in your twenties

God he sucks at dates

Holy shit Saber's eye-sparkles at the sandwiches give me life

she actually went in to wipe the sauce off he actually chickened out of it

Rin's banter makes Shirou think that she's gonna fight him, but I swear she's talking about sex He's just failing every sense motive check

Fujimora: Hey Kuritsugu, do you know someone named Saber? *grave cracks straight down the middle*

SEASON 2

"Well, I have nowhere to go but up" ~Shirou, probably

Did the subs explain why Shirou stole that depleted healing gem from Rin?

Aaand the animators are really getting their kicks out of Saber's enslavement

"Your Servant body cannot resist me."

Yeah, even without having seen the original series, I'd call BS on her having killed Kirei.

More flashbacks to the Keyblade graveyard - I mean, Archer's past.

Archer went from sassy older brother to Rin's personal motivational speaker in no time

Rin is the ballsiest motherf*cker wanting to take on Caster. I can see that Archer considers her wanting Shirou and Saber back together to be a weakness.

I get that Rin thinks she can beat Caster, but why would Rin think that CASTER would think that Rin could win?

"Come down here so I can kick your ass." get her, girl

Looks like Archer's looking ahead and playing the long game. He knows that he has to keep Caster in one place or surprise her. Head on confrontations won't work on her. I hope.

Good to see Shirou getting faster with that, but it looks like he's not fully recovered.

I would like to think that Rin can see what Archer's doing.

"I've always adored and watched you from a distance." your execution sucks

"I don't hate you, and your cooking's pretty good" need me a freak like that

I like how neither Rin nor Shirou consider asking Shinji to join them for even a moment, but the crazy child who tried to murder them sounds like a Good Idea

Aaand Caster's flashback suddenly went even more Instrumentality Project than the Fate/Zero finale

"Not like this!" whatever, I hope you get eaten alive by beetles

Aww hey, I remember this courtyard

I went from being ticked at these homunculi nurses to fuckin loving them in two seconds flat

Aww, damn

I-Iris?

WHAT IS THE GRAIL CURSE DOING HERE?!

why do u make me cry

I want nothing more than for Shirou to be like "Shinji? Last time I saw you you were pissing yourself running to the church."

Tohsaka: "Your PTSD is bullshit and your coping mechanisms are crap"

Shirou: "I wanted to become a man like him." Audience: You really don't.

So if I'm getting my analysis right, if Shirou neglects his own happiness in the pursuit of saving others, all he will ever do is save people so that they in turn can martyr themselves (in the same way that Kiritsugu "saved" Shirou). But by the same token, if Rin keeps saving Shirou without making it clear that it's for her own desires, then she'll never be able to convince Shirou to be selfish.

Shirou just got all clingy bf. wow.

AND SHE'S INTO IT

*Lancer breaks the fourth wall*

"If I have to put up with this I'm gonna kick Caster's ass all by myself!" oh she'd do it too

Everyone with purple hair in this show needs a teddy bear and a warm hug

Oh my god the Archer/Lancer banter is like a couple of old men. It's hilarious

"Like I would ever walk on somebody else's grass!" XD

The Archer/Lancer fight is turning out to be my favorite anime fight scene

I feel like Rin was gonna warn Lancer that Archer likes to taunt and throw off his opponents, but the pridful fucker didn't listen, and now he's getting goaded. MAN I hope Archer's bluffing about his heel-face turn.

... Did Archer just manifest an AT field???

Archer. Cold.

ARCHER

So, is Archer some kind of Shirou Alter?

SABER AND RIN. HOLY SHIT

He's seen Excalibur. Oh noe

This is what I'm talking about. Learns more from his enemies than his friends.

Break his nose, Rin

So earlier, Archer pronounced his AT field as "Ayas", but I'm pretty sure it would be spelled as 'Aegis'.

KICK HIM

oh that was even more satisfying

and Lancer's dialogue continues to be perfect

Aww, man, Lancer can't get a break

oh. Lancer got a break :)

please not another choking scene

I was about to say, Lancer hadn't disappeared yet

Well, Archer turned out to be a huge asshole, and Rin's been tied up for the last two episdoes, so Lancer is my new favorite.

Archer's gonna burn up all his mana before he kills Shirou at this rate

Waitaminute, what happened to Assassin?!

Oh. Oh, Archer.

Ah, is Shinji finally gonna bite the dust? Thanks, Gilgamesh.

I am very content with their pre-battle resolutions and meal. The scene has a feeling of rightness to it.

"Saber doesn't stand a chance against him!" "On what basis do you make that judgement?" "On the basis that he's smoked every other Spirit he's fought without taking a scratch, while you got beaten up by a teacher with magic punches."

Aww, Rin doesn't want to tell Shirou he's their only hope of beating Goldy. Not sure whether it's her pride or that she doesn't want to put that pressure/risk on him.

Waitaminute, are Rin and Saber banging to do something magical circuit related?!?

NOPE

"All I told you to do is take your clothes off!"

But boy, Rin sure was acting like they were gonna have to bang to do the transfer. Type-Moon is using their own sleazy rep to fake-out the audience.

Anyway, Rin's plan for Shirou to use the reality marble is great, but she doesn't know about World Ender.

C'mon Shirou, a girl gives you her magic crest, you gotta at least do some pillow talk.

She fantasizes about him doing high jumps all day? Kinky.

The conversation they're NOT having is that, one way or another, Saber won't be here tomorrow.

Also, I'm reasonably certain that Gilgamesh was corrupted by the Grail when he got drenched in it. He didn't give a fuck about it before, but now he wants to do something symbolic about wiping out humanity with their own wishes. He was a chronic narcissist before, but now he's gone full megalomaniac.

oh, nevermind, there's the conversation

Jeez, I can't believe a key component of this plan is "save Shinji"

THERE'S FUCKIN ASSASSIN

I'm assuming that Goldy has just been steadily leeching off of others for mana over the course of ten years, so he's not gonna run out anytime soon.

I think Grail!Iris wants to kick the shit out of Goldy as much as I do.

"A mage is simply no match for a Servant" Pft, like when?

I really want Shirou to summon Eya (sp?) while Goldy is laughing, just to shut him up.

Rin, goddammit, stop being proud and let Saber help you

WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? ARCHER?

YES RIN-ARCHER DREAM TEAM TAKES THE WIN

WOOH, GAINAX BOOM!

So, last time the Grail's destruction caused fire and death to rain upon the city. This time, the Grail's destruction causes... a rain of pretty sparks?

FINALLY DREW BLOOD FROM THAT MOTHERFUCKER

Goldy, you sore loser!

"But first, take a step to the right."

Emiya-Archer making an appearance at the end did not at all fit with established mechanics and I am 100% okay with that.

HE WAS ABOUT TO PROPOSE

He's her bodyguard/apprentice? Sweet.

Who the fuck is this chick?

THIS is Luvia??

Her dialect is obnoxious.

Rin in tight clothes is a gift

The Epilogue seems a little late in the series to try and wedge in a love triangle

Join the Mage's Association? *pft*

I'm terribly peeved that Shinji survived this thing. The worm.

Oh boy, Tohsaka got bold - planning rendevous in the student council prez's face.

"I should have known you would take advantage of me again." SPILL THE TEA, SHIROU

"Look me in the eyes and say that you'll come." Honestly, I'm just adding this line to the list to mess with Carlos.

WAVER!!!!!!!!!!

Rin has been giving Shirou bedroom eyes in every scene of the epilogue

"Got some things to work out of my system" like all of the sexual tension built up over this series?

Closing thoughts: -What pretty animation -The romance/fluff was excellent -Archer and Lancer clearly got the best dialogue -Shinji can go jump in a lake -Sakura still needs a teddy bear -Iris deserved better -Caster Did Nothing Wrong -Why is there an after-scene after the f*cking Epilogue? -Archer is such a buzzkill

[monsterpark-rpg]

Eric Accepted

Mun Info:

Name- daisy!!

Age- 25!!! yikes!!!!!!

Pronouns- she/her

Time Zone- central (-6 utc)

Ic Info:

Character’s name- Eric Theodore Cartman.

Age- 17.

Gender/pronouns- He/Him.

Species- Siren.

Physical description- Eric Cartman is a big boy. Beefy all his life, Eric’s lack of participation in basic activities like sports has lead to his frame being bigger. While he grew a bit through puberty, and that helped fill himself out, he’s still a bigger guy. That said, he’s not nearly as repulsive as he was as a kid. Although at ten he was cheeto-stained and, admittedly, a Fart Factory, at 17 he avoids that stigma… Like the plague, honestly. It isn’t about OCD or a concern for hygiene, but more because he knows that people expect him to be disgusting and reek of B.O.,and so for ego’s sake he’s gone the exact opposite route. His hair is always neatly styled, cologne is a staple, as well as showering after gym and applying deodorant. If he has a beard– Which, he’s been known to occasionally if he’s feeling particularly edgy– it’s well manicured and never seems to go through that awkward patchy phase that a lot of teens are cursed with. His eyes are blue, bright and matching Kenny’s, and while they work fine, he sometimes is a bit far sighted and therefore must wear glasses. And if he’s lazy he’ll keep them on all day because they don’t super matter to him.

Personality description-  Eric has been rowdy his entire life. Almost by definition, he’s been a bastard since he popped out. That hasn’t really changed. Always out to have a good time, he isn’t afraid to have that time at the expense of someone else’s. Whether it be monetarily or emotionally, Eric’s idea of ‘nice’ and 'fun’ has always been highly subjective depending on if you’re him or not. Typically, if you aren’t him? You don’t agree. Still, he’s relatively chill. Outwardly, he uses charm to make friends and get what he wants, forgoing the cursing and demeaning remarks about entire races of people that didn’t get him anywhere ten years ago. It would seem to most people like he 'grew up’. He’s one of those kids that people look back on and they’re very impressed because he 'kicked puberty’s ass’. That said, for the most part? It’s a total lie. Eric’s entire personality at this point is a careful construction of lies. His emotions vary wildly, and if it’s not horrifyingly intense and powerful, then he usually isn’t feeling anything at all. Eric doesn’t trust people typically, even mostly those people he’s known his entire life, and opts instead to keep people at arm’s length and use them to advance himself in lieu of actually making friends. Which is fine. Most people would rather hang out with his chill self anyway, and not the dangerous psychopath he clearly wants to be.

Background- Mrs. Cartman has always been a lady that’s been down to have a good time, no one is denying that. Eric, unfortunately, is what happens when she’s a bit too down. A party in a swamp gone wrong, to this day Eric doesn’t know if his mother is partially a monster or just all human, but he does know that his blood is different than her’s in a very real way. Specifically, that his Siren blood comes from his dad’s side. Not that any of that mattered for quite some time. Cartman has been spoiled his entire life. Maybe he could attribute it later in his life to his abilities,  but realistically Liane just… Really liked to spoil her son. They were truly each others’ best friends. It was only around 8-10 where they realized something was different about Eric. He’s always had… A way with words. Able to convince entire cities and countries to do his bidding with just a tearful song or 1-paragraph essay, Eric’s ability to manipulate and coerce people to do whatever he wanted only grew with age. He got worse the older he got, able to whine at teachers for a better grade and talk even the most stoic diabetic out of their afternoon snacks. It’s done him well, even to this point. He doesn’t overuse his ability– Not anymore, though there was a period of time where he was very liberal with his power of persuasion– but it’s well known how just damn good Eric is with his words, and how it’s just best to avoid talking to him if he’s got that look in his eye.

Head cannons- ‣ As a Siren, Eric’s ability doesn’t come out in the typical way. He can sing and play piano, sure, but it’s mediocre at best– Though he’d probably still be able to convince one or two idiots through song, his abilities manifest best as words and debate. It causes the victim’s brain to go fuzzy and warm, and it isn’t just that they're forced to agree and do what Eric says… They want to. They’re happy to give Eric whatever he wants. ‣ There’s a downside to this ability, though. It started small around the time when his vocal ability was starting, but much like his lineage, Eric goes through… Changes, when he’s upset. Prone to violent mood swings, this often goes poorly for him, forcing him to shift into a monstrously swampy creature with talons and fangs. And while he’s maybe handsome if you’re into that sort of thing, he’s decidedly more monstrous, often staying in that form until he can regain control of his emotions. Which is hard, because Eric is typically prone to outbursts until he gets his way, and he doesn’t get his way until he can convince people to let him have it, and he can’t convince people when he looks horrifying and… It’s a whole vicious circle thing. Very messy. Usually someone who already knows about his awful form and still wants to hang out will be the victim of him 'getting himself back under control’. Ends justify the means, and all that. ‣ Eric’s smart. Maybe that’s not something that necessarily has to come with the 'could talk his way into the Presidency’, since he could just spout garbage and hope it effects people the same, but it’s something that he takes pride in. His intelligence isn’t something he likes insulted, and he has the grades to back it up. Often people accuse him of being stupid because he can just convince teachers into giving him a good grade, but that just isn’t the case. He has too much pride for that. Though, if worst comes to worst, he totally will do it. It’s just, y'know. Not his first option.

Sample roleplay- School was a breeze. Who was he kidding, school had always been a breeze, but senior year was like something out of a joke book. 'Hey, you took all your required classes for your senior year beforehand, so this year you can just take whatever classes you think will be fun!’ As if Eric needed can excuse to slack off. Still, his grin was big as he slid to the front of the classroom– Not a hideously easy task, considering he thicc, but not godawful, either. It was fine. He didn’t take up two desks or anything, thank god. Finding his position at the podium, Eric took a moment to make himself comfortable. The past three kids in the public speaking class had all had papers and notecards, presumably because they 'needed them’. Another joke. This year was full of them. But Eric had no such thing, instead opting to set his phone on the podium and bring up Facebook, beginning to scroll through until the teacher cleared her throat. “Right,” Eric said, looking up and leaning onto the wood, hearing the podium creak under his weight. “Today my debate is about fucking vegans,” He looked up at the echoing groan scattering through the classroom, a few students looking at each other in the back even as his grin grew shark like, predatory. “And how they’re killing bees.” Eric would have Vegans suspended by lunch. More honeybuns for him.