#the heat gets turned up and our scientists are forced into crunch time!

[faces-in-unexpected-places]

Do You Have the Time? Episode 012: Three Months

[April 9th, 2018, 16:42]

Leslie blinked and nudged herself out of her thoughts. She was hunkered over her clunky, wooden desk in her physics department office. It was so bulky that it almost took up the entire width of the room; she always had to squeeze between the desk and the wall if she wanted to get up. The room did not come with an overhead light, so she was forced to bring a lamp which gave her office a moody disposition. In front of her table sat two cushioned chairs for her students to sit in while they visited her office hours. On her left-side wall hung a shelf with plushie subatomic particles. Protons, electrons, quarks, photons, and her personal favourite, the Higgs Boson. Sitting isolated from the toys was a plastic essential oil diffuser that had a wood-like design, so that it matched the wood in her office. The scent was mild, but she chose to give her office a hint of peppermint this time.

On the other wall, her bachelor’s degree in physics and a concentration in mathematics. Just next to it rested her doctorate in Astronomy. The rest of the wall space was taken up paintings and drawings. One painting had a pink tree that sat on a hill as its focal point. The grass, winding turns of the land, and the pathway leading away from the tree were all showcased in different shades of pink and red. A black and white drawing of an abandoned medieval castle with foliage growing out of the cracks and all over the exterior bricks joined the tree painting.

Her desk was orderly and minimalistic like the one she used in the lab, as well. There was an inbox and an outbox towards the far left corner, and they contained a moderate amount of papers in each. She was grading a student’s exam from her Basic Physics I course. She had supposedly gotten distracted some time ago. Before she could refocus herself, a knock occurred at her door. “Come in!” she said, out of sorts, but still cheerful.

Max stepped in through the door, smiled at her and took a seat in one of her chairs. Leslie’s cheer quickly dissipated.

“How’s the semester wrapping up for you, Leslie? I hope it’s good! I’ve barely seen you in the department for the whole time,” he poked.

“Yes, it’s going fine. How about yours?” she responded with caution. “It’s pretty great. You know, I wanted to tell you: I think after this spring is finished up, the university is going to let me start teaching three credit hour classes, instead of one and two,” he leaned back in his chair with his legs crossed.

“That’s really great, Max. Congratulations,” she said, mildly.

“You do know what that means, right?” he asked, seeming confused.

“Yes, I do. It’s great news for you.”

“It means I’ll get a raise!”

“Yeah, it’s wonderful!” Leslie repeated, trying to sound more enthusiastic.

“Exactly, thank you!” Max replied, appearing satisfied, “In a few years, I’ll try to get my own lab for research. Right now, I’m just trying to get things off the ground. I could try to do joint-research with another professor like you did, but I’d rather have it be my own brainchild. Do you know what I mean? It just feels more real that way.”

Leslie instantly felt fatigued, after being re-exposed to Max’s affect.

“Do I know the difference between working on a team and as an individual? Yes, I know what you mean,” she said with a quick, half-joking chuckle. Max noted the comment and his expression appeared pompous in response.

“Are you still working with, uh, what was his name?”

“Dr. Leopold,” she said.

“Oh, that’s right. Looney was his name. He’s at the same level as us, right? He’s an assistant professor? Except he’s like thirty years older?”

“Yes, he’s an assistant professor. But he is right where he needs to be,” she defended.

“No, of course,” he threw his hands up in the air, “With how long he’s been in the game, you’d think he’d have more prestige, but you are right. He’s right where he should to be.”

Leslie narrowed her eyes at him. She remained silent, picked up her pen and continued grading the exam on her desk.

“We’re all doing great, actually,” she decided to continue, “We’ve had some new personnel in the lab for about seven months now. He’s been pretty great to work with.”

“Oh, that’s nice. What are his specialties?” Max quickly jumped on the subject.

“He’s got a great mind for mechanics and theory. He brought a lot of fresh ideas for our current research project, and it’s going to pay off well. I think he’s doing his dissertation on it, too.”

“Oh,” Max scoffed, “So, he doesn’t even have his PhD?”

“No, but he’s making great progress so far,” Leslie countered.

“Well, great job to him. Best of luck. Getting a PhD in physics is nothing like a bachelor’s,” Max jabbed, “Listen, I know that you’ve known Leopold for a long time. But I’m drawing up the hypotheses now, so that when I actually get my lab, my team can move fast. And, you’re very experienced and intelligent, and I would really love it… you know,” he nodded, “if you came to work for me.”

Leslie tensed her body and leaned back at her desk, away from Max.

“Just think about it, is all. It might give more opportunities than working with Looney and that other guy.”

“Jeremy,” she corrected.

“Jerry?”

“His name is Jeremy.”

“Jerome?” he asked with a smirk.

“Never mind,” she snapped, “Thank you for the offer, Maxwell, I will… certainly think about it,” she responded distantly.

“I really think that would be the right choice for you,” he said with excitement in his voice, “I think you’re very qualified, you know? You’ve put so much effort into all your studies, and I just think you could do so much more if you weren’t… well— you know— chasing shadows,” he said with a sympathetic raise of his eyebrows.

“…Chasing shadows?” she asked with distrust.

He laughed wryly to himself.

“I mean, come on, Leslie, time travel? It’s kind of a pipe dream. The math says we can do it, but our bodies can’t withstand the stress of time travel,” he muttered and chuckled, “It’s… it’s science fiction. It’s great science fiction. I can kill a whole weekend poring over time travel stories. But I think there should be a ‘time’ when you—when you finally let Looney go, and stop pretending that you’ll find something, you know? He hasn’t had tuition to pay for you for how long? I mean, what’s the point, now?”

“Well, the point, is that he might find a way around those human body problems,” she said curtly. She clenched her jaw, and felt her blood boil as the subject shifted from her to Leopold.

He widened his eyes and leaned toward her. She leaned even further away. “Are you really on board with this loon?”

Leslie felt her face and hands heating up with outrage. The nerve that Max had to plant himself in her office and question her decisions. To question Leopold when he knew nothing about him or the things he’d done for her. Her emotions felt like they were on the border of losing control; her body was shaking. She had no idea what to say or do. All Leslie wanted to do was fight. In whatever way she could. She sat up straight and prepared to retaliate. A knock resonated on her door. Leslie instantly retracted her temper, cleared her throat and answered.

“Come in!”

The door opened and Madison danced through it, accidentally swinging her backpack around. One of her loose straps whipped Max on the cheek. It was harmless, so Leslie didn’t say anything about it. She threw her book-bag down while sporting a grand smile, and plopped herself into the chair next to Max. “Damn girl, you really do have your own set up here, too!”

“Of course I do, honey. Why would I lie about that?” she asked, still with a hint of hostility.

“It’s just crazy, you’ve got two offices?! You are such a boss!” Madison continued, unaware of Leslie’s tone.

“We all have offices though, so… technically we’re all bosses,” Max interjected. Madison furrowed her brow in his direction, glanced at Leslie, then back to Max.

“Uh, hi,” she said.

“Madison, this is Dr. Murphy. A physics professor here at the university. He was just leaving,” she said with a glare in his direction.

“Yes, actually, I was. I’ve got some things to wrap up before I can go home today,” he played along and stood up. “I think we had a great talk, Leslie. We’ll catch up again another time, soon.”

“Enjoy your day,” Leslie said with aggravated precision. Max effortlessly crept out the door, and left Madison and Leslie together in the office. Madison wore a confused smile on her face and tilted her head.

“Damn Leslie, that boy stirs something up in you, doesn’t he? What, is he your ex or something?”

Leslie sighed.

“Why does everyone keep saying that?” she mumbled under her breath. “No, he’s not,” she said aloud.

“Well, what’s his problem? Or what’s your problem with him?”

“Oh, honey, it’s all hard to remember,” Leslie exhaled. “We were friends a long time ago, and then somewhere along the way, I feel like he started getting… weird with me, and I don’t know what I did to even warrant it, and—” she shuddered. “It’s been a long day. Maybe we should talk about something else. How are classes? Are you ready for finals?” she redirected the conversation.

Madison scoffed.

“Fat chance,” she replied with not hesitation, “If we’re going to talk about something else, let’s at least make it not about my struggles, alright?”

“Okay, that’s okay,” Leslie accepted. They paused and thought about ways to break the silence.

“It took me forever to find your office,” Madison started, “But thanks for telling me where it is. It looks really nice! Wish I had my own space like this.”

Leslie chuckled.

“I think it might actually be a utility closet that the university just converted to an office for me. But I made it my own, anyway. If this is the hand they deal me, I don’t even want to know what kind of deal the adjunct professors get,” she joked.

“I really like the decorations you’ve got. It brings out a cutesy side of you that I didn’t know about!” Madison commented, “Those are some sweet paintings and adorable toys.”

“Aww, thanks, sweetie. I made them myself!”

“You what? Really?”

“Oh yeah!” Leslie smiled, “The paintings took a while, but the plushies? I could do a few of those in a day.”

“That is so amazing, do you take requests?!” Madison nearly shouted and leaned toward the desk, “I had no idea you liked stuff like this! Why haven’t we talked about this instead. Who cares about chemistry and science and all that other garbage, you can make toys! Honestly, you would make a pretty good Santa Clause. Mostly your personality, though. You’re pretty much the opposite of Santa in the physical appearance department.”

“Thank you?” Leslie replied with a perplexed smile and furrowed brow, “How about this, Madison: I was planning on leaving soon, so I am going to pack up my stuff and go to research building. I haven’t checked to see if our lab has been reopened for a few days. If you want, you can walk with me, and we can talk all about our hobbies and destress the whole time.”

“You got it, boss!”

“Okay,” she said with a slight laugh.

“So, if I have to take a physics class, does that mean I could have you as my professor?” Madison asked.

“Umm, probably not, sweetie. I usually teach the simpler physics courses for non-science majors,” Leslie stacked the inbox papers on her desk and placed them into her backpack.

“What about Leo?”

“Hmm… he doesn’t teach as consistently as I do. He’s known to take breaks every few semesters. But he might teach more diverse classes, so… it’s possible!”

Leslie powered down her computer and slipped between the wall and desk, carrying her backpack in her hands. She cracked the door open and squeezed out of her office.

“Whew!” she chuckled. Madison jumped out into the hallway after her. Leslie reached around her and shut the office door behind them. She led the way out of the physics building and through campus as Madison skipped alongside her. Madison grilled her with questions about her paintings and plush toys. When did she start? Why did she start? What are her influences? What’s her favourite part? Can she teach Madison to make toys? As soon as Leslie answered one question, Madison instantly replaced it with another. She was flattered by Madison’s interest, but ultimately, her investment in crafty projects was less intense than Madison’s. Maybe if Madison got to participate with her, she would get her fill and move on. Leslie considered inviting her back to her apartment to paint and make plushes, but decided to put it off. She thought it best to ask when Madison was less wound up about the whole thing.

Leslie opened the doors to their research building to see Leopold leaned against Martha’s front desk, laughing. Seeing the two of them create happy moments for Leo to remember made her smile. He turned to the noise of the door opening and waved her and Madison over.

“Hey there, you two!” Leopold said, “I was just wondering where everyone was.”

Leslie almost seemed to ignore what he said and immediately went in for an unexpected, and tight hug. She glommed onto Leo; wrapped her arms around his torso and rested her chin on his shoulder.

“Whoa—okaaay!” he jolted happily, “What’s this all about, poppet?” he chuckled, It’s only been a few days, you know.”

“Don’t you think I’m a little old to be called poppet?” she said, still attached to him.

“Not when you’re stuck to me like this, you’re not!”

“Come to think of it, ‘poppet’ is a name for little girls! You should have called me that when I was seven, not seventeen!”

“Oh, so, I missed you by a decade, big deal!”

Madison began playing with the trinkets on Martha’s desk, and talking to her. Leslie released Leo from her grip.

“What was all this about anyway, huh?” he asked, with a gentle smile.

“I was just thinking about you today. We’ve come a long way from eleven years ago.”

Leopold hummed and nodded to her statement.

“Yes, we have, kid… yes, we have.”

Their attention was brought to voices coming near from the hallway opposite to Leopold’s lab. Leslie stepped in front of Leo and faced Sophia walking towards them. Jeremy walked alongside her with IO next to him. Someone else about Jeremy’s age accompanied Sophia on the other side, conversing with her. He had dark, shaggy, over-washed hair, and bangs that came to sharp looking points on his forehead. He wore burgundy and cream coloured plaid pants, an unbuttoned lab coat, and a white shirt underneath it that read ‘I bet you can’t 01010011 01110000 01100101 01100001 01101011 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001.’ He had wire-framed glasses and carried multiple pens in the breast pocket of his lab coat. Just under his pocket was a blue Space Invader. Jeremy looked uncomfortable in their conversation, if not aggravated.

“So Dr. Blythe was thinking we could generously use the left over money in our lab’s grant combined with the surplus in The Board of Research’s budget to host the conference in San Diego this year.”

Jeremy rolled his eyes.

“Oh really? Blythe said that?” Sophia said with a flat tone.

“After she supported the idea, I decided to bring it to you to run it up the chain of command to the department head. I know you two are close,” he explained.

“So this is your idea. Not Blythe’s,” she concluded.

“Thought it might sound more convincing if it was coming from her, but yes, it’s mine,” he quickly rambled, “But whomever it came from, it’s a good idea. And that’s the part that matters.”

Sophia sighed in exasperation.

“I’m sorry Dexter, I simply don’t see a benefit of moving the conference across the country when doing it in the Curiesville convention centre has proven perfectly adequate time and time again.”

“Except that it would renew interest in local research, and increase overall attendance,” Dexter hinted before she could walk away. Sophia finally turned to face him and crossed her arms, giving her full attention for the first time. Jeremy frowned and backed away with IO. His lab friends also watched the scene, uncomfortably.

“Anything else?” Sophia challenged with an irritated, furrowed brow, “If you’re going to keep following me around, at least tell me your entire proposal so I can veto it. I’m sick of my answer, which is no, by the way, being countered with yet another reason why I should reconsider. So, come on, out with it. Why is this such a great idea?”

“If we host it in San Diego, people will be more interested in the event, and attendance will go up. People have more fun, it draws more attention to the university, then to our research, then we get an increase in grants. Maybe certain people get some raises? Maybe the board or even individual labs get sponsorships? There are infinite possibilities. The likelihood of any of these also increases with the amount of time we spend there. If it was a weekend event, people could do more networking, and enjoy the luxuries of the west coast. We’ve never had those opportunities in cold, dry Curiesville,” Dexter leaned back after his speech, appearing pleased with himself.

“Hmm,” Sophia paused with caution.

“I would certainly be more motivated to present in San Diego, and Dr. Blythe and I have some of the most cutting-edge research in the building. And that’s not hubris, that’s just a fact.”

“And how do you propose transportation would work? How do you know the board wouldn’t end up losing money by paying for a larger number of participants than usual to fly out to California?” she cross-examined.

“Because people from San Diego would also attend, and possibly other research institutes if we made it public enough. Transportation could be left up to the participants, anyway,” he said, “Realistically, if their research is worth presenting, I’m sure they can spare a few hundred dollars of grant money to travel to California for a weekend,” he shrugged.

The colour drained from Leopold’s face and he broke into a cold sweat. Leslie and Jeremy glanced at him with similar expressions. He reflexively shook his head at Dexter’s idea. It caught Sophia’s eye and she worked to conceal a smirk. She cleared her throat and maintained a professional demeanour with Dexter.

“I am making no deals, nor promises,” she began, “But I will look into it.”

“I’ll check in with you for regular updates, soon,” he said proudly.

“Don’t get excited,” she said, “I still have the time travel club to deal with before I can get to work on that.” They turned from each other and faced Leopold and his team.

“Yeah, what’s the deal Jeremy, why’d you bring the party pooper to our party? To POOP ON—?” Madison blurted out.

“OkaAAAY,” Leslie talked over her and covered her mouth, “You’ve made a great point just now, sweetie, that’s probably good enough.”

“You might want to watch how you talk to the person who is about to give you your lab back,” Sophia scoffed. The team traded glimpses in surprise at the remark.

“So… the gas leak was fixed?” Leo deduced.

“Yeah, essentially,” she replied, “It turns out that one of the pipes that collects the fumes from one of the organic chemistry labs had a fissure in it, so a lot of those gases — methane, hydrogen, chlorine — were starting to leak into your lab. But it’s been repaired, and they’re being disposed of properly again. I had the seals taken off your doors this morning; the air should be fine.”

The group looked at Jeremy for further validation.

“She wanted me to deliver the news, but I thought you should hear it from her. That’s why  I brought her here with me,” Jeremy added, “Less room for miscommunication.”

Leopold’s anxious face softened. Leslie kept a straight face and an erect posture in an attempt to remain professional.

“Well… we appreciate you being so transparent on the issue, Sophia,” she said with a hint of gratitude, “And great job to you, Jeremy. Great idea.”

He acknowledged her compliment with a smile and a nod. Dexter stepped forward and scanned the time travel club.

“Hmph,” Dexter enunciated, “So your research is temporal relocation. How far into the past or future have you been able to travel? Or are you still testing objects?” he asked.

Leopold sheepishly glanced off to the side.

“W—well, we are still working out the kinks for experiment one—”

“You haven’t even started experiments yet? Don’t you know that at least one research paper needs to be finished by July? And that abstracts need to be turned in by June? Have you even written your introduction?”

“No, but—” Jeremy stuttered.

“Do you even have a ‘time machine?’” he scoffed, “I don’t even have to do any calculations to know that you’ll have to work overtime every day to be prepared for the conference.”

“I’m sorry, Dexter, I don’t ever remember Leopold asking for your opinion,” Leslie shot back, “Why don’t you worry about your own research, and we’ll see you at the conference in August.”

“I don’t have anything to worry about because my presentation and research project is finished. Dr. Blythe and I are treating Cystic Fibrosis with CRISPR-Cas9. I don’t assume you’ve heard of that.”

“I have, actually,” Leslie said with folded arms.

“Well, it’ll be old news soon, anyway. Dr. Blythe and I will be starting a new, joint-project together after the convention. It’ll be my last project in my post-doc.”

“You’re getting your post-doctorate right now?” Jeremy questioned.

“That’s right. I really played my cards right. If I hadn’t I’d probably still be getting my PhD, too,” he shrugged. Jeremy felt lighter with a surge of anger and shock running through him. He couldn’t think of anything to say, for he was too caught off guard. He clenched his jaw.

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” Leslie spat.

Jeremy wondered how she even came up with anything to say.

“Then keep your eyes open, and you’ll be believing it any day now. I should tweak a few things in my paper before they publish it, anyway. Better get to work, Jeremy,” Dexter heckled, “I’m excited to read your first paper; I’m sure it will be great. But I’m a sucker for science fiction, so I’m biased.”

“Wha— I—”

“Come with me, Dexter. I want to finish working out the kinks of this San Diego trip before I forget. Enjoy your lab, there, Loon. Manage your time well,” Sophia mocked Leopold as she and Dexter turned and walked away.

“Oh, we will be just fine. Brilliant ideas work fast,” Leslie called to the both of them. She stood still, staring at their backs in silence. Madison and Leopold both stirred, as if they were going to leave, but she pulled both of them back to her side.

“Not yet. Stay here,” she directed, “Jeremy. Get over here, too.”

Confused and unsure, he drifted over to the other three with IO following behind. Leslie faced them in the same direction as her. She held a stone-cold expression, glaring Dexter and Sophia down while holding the rest of her team close. Martha held her body stiffly, out of discomfort. Jeremy spoke to her quietly, out of the side of his mouth.

“I thought you said people were intimidated by me for researching time travel,” he said.

“Well, I sure was! But… I am intimidated by most people who work here. Maybe I misread the room a little bit. Sorry sweetie,” she replied.

He sighed.

“I still think you’re all geniuses!” she whispered.

“At least we’ve got someone in our fan club,” Leo laughed wryly.

“Hey girl, you really know how to stand up for people!” Madison praised.

“Yeah, other people…” Leslie murmured, “Uh— but I— thank you, dear.” The two finally turned the corner and the team was officially alone. Leslie dispersed the group.

“Everything is not fine! We have to get moving,” she whisper-shouted, “We have to start writing our introduction!” She skittered down the hallway opposite to the one of their enemies, and waved them to follow her. Madison immediately lunged forward with her.

“Hey, hey, wait!” Martha whisper-shouted. Leslie kept running. Madison stopped in her tracks and looked back from a distance. Leopold and Jeremy came closer to her desk. Martha reached down beneath her desk, and placed three cardboard boxes on the surface.

“You got something delivered today,” she said, “I personally held onto them for you, just in case. I don’t trust some of these other employees around here, you know?”

Leopold glimpsed at the return address and raised his eyebrows. He picked up a box to check their weights. They were all fairly light, as he expected.

“The chemicals came?” Jeremy asked.

“Early,” Leo emphasised, “By an entire week!” he exclaimed, “Let’s go, let’s go! We’ve got work to do! Thank you, Martha! This is just what we needed!”

She smiled as Leo snatched a box, and ran. Madison stood frozen, unsure of what to do. Jeremy waved her away in the direction of their lab. He carried one box and stuffed the other inside the carrying compartment in IO’s body.

“Go on ahead, we got the boxes! We have no time to lose!”

[keelywolfe]

FIC: Beneath an Aurora Sky ch. 21

Summary: The South Pole Station is equipped for research and Edge has always made sure things run smoothly for the inhabitants. His charges are meant to follow his rules and regulations, and in turn, he makes sure they survive in the arctic temperatures. It takes plenty of hard work and determination and Edge, along with his crew, can handle both.

He wasn’t counting on one of the newest researchers. He wasn’t expecting Rus.

Tags: Spicyhoney, First Time, Arctic AU, Hurt/Comfort

~~*~~

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four

Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine | Chapter Ten | Chapter Eleven | Chapter Twelve

Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17

Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20

~~*~~

Read Chapter 21 on AO3

or

Read it here!

~~*~~

Before Edge and Rus even got to the entrance of the main building, he could hear Rus shivering, bones rattling even through his heavy clothes from being too long outside. Edge quickened his stride, boots crunching on the hardpacked snow as he pulled Rus along behind him into the outer vestibule, out of the cold. His teeth were chattering so loudly he couldn’t speak, but Edge didn’t wait for him to force any words past the clatter. He stripped off his own gloves, tossing them carelessly aside to start on Rus’s gear. The zipper stuck halfway down on his heavy coat, nearly frozen closed and Edge yanked it loose.

Clumsy, gloved hands tried to interfere with his own in feeble protest, Rus chattering out, “h-here, i c-c-an help.”

“Hold still,” Edge commanded, impatiently batting them aside. “Getting you warm is more important than your dignity right now.” He was already biting back foul curses that Rus might mistake as meant for him but were entirely for himself. He should have forced Rus inside earlier instead of allowing his turmoil over what was happening to override his sense. None of this would matter if they failed at basic safety protocols.

Rus’s hands fell away reluctantly. He let Edge strip off his outer gear, obediently standing on one foot and then the other so that Edge could pull off his boots. Edge stripped off the socks, ignoring Rus’s startled complaint as he thoroughly checked his toes. They were icy against his warmer hands, but they showed no sign of frostbite, the bones their normal ivory without any darkened patches or worse. He switched to his hands, pulling off Rus’s gloves to check his fingers as well. Again, his bones were chilled but there was no real damage.

Their outer clothing was carelessly strewn around them and the melting snow from their boots left spreading puddles on the rugs that would earn anyone else a stern reprimand. Edge ignored it all, yanking open the bright orange lid of one of the emergency bins that were stationed on both sides of the door. Tucked in with the first aid equipment and flares were several heavy wool blankets. Edge shook one out and wrapped it around Rus’s shoulders, enveloping him in the scratchy folds as he rubbed his arms and back briskly. Slowly, the teeth chattering eased down to the occasional shudder, Rus burrowing into the blanket until only the top of his head showed, his eye lights bright as he peered out through the gap.

“thanks, b-boss,” Rus said ruefully. He held up a hand, watching his own fingers as he waggled them stiffly. “if i wreck anything on the bod, i won’t get my deposit back.”

“Hush, fool,” Edge said. At first, he was only exasperated with his inability to keep back a smile, Rus did not need any encouragement to take reckless risks. He sobered quickly, reminded of what Rus’s brother said about him being made. Nothing more than a key for a very specific lock. With some effort, Edge schooled his expression into something sterner. “Kitchen, now,” he ordered, and Rus nodded sheepishly, letting Edge help him to his feet. As much as he would have preferred to scoop Rus up and carry him, there were the other researchers to consider. Some propriety was to be expected, encouraged, he couldn’t simply…the moment Rus stumbled, Edge abandoned the pretense and swept him up in his arms, walking swiftly towards the galley. He couldn’t regret it as Rus laid his skull against Edge’s chest with a quiet sigh, automatically tightening his hold. Abruptly, he didn’t care what anyone else thought of it. However this might play out, his time of being able to hold Rus in his arms was soon ending. He was going to take every opportunity he could.

Edge pushed his way through the dining room door and headed directly into the kitchen where Bonnie was stirring a pot at the stove with the makings for tonight’s dinner neatly laid out on the countertop next to her. There was door indicator light in one corner that flashed as they came in and Bonnie turned to look at them, her expression of mild irritation shifting to concern as she saw Rus. She began signing immediately, a fluttering swathe of concern and questions as she bustled over to where Edge was settling Rus into a nearby chair.

“No, he’s fine,” Edge replied, signing swiftly before Rus managed to form a single word with his trembling hands. “He only needs a hot drink and a chance to warm up.”

She nodded and quickly poured a cup of hot water from the kettle on the back of the stove, adding a tea bag. Bonnie kept signing as she worked, a furious flurry of scolding and worry in between slamming a heavy pot on an empty burner. Edge only let her rant, holding Rus’s hands between his own to help warm them. She took a container from the refrigerator that Edge knew contained her special broth, her own recipe for wayward scientists who needed warming.

When Rus tried to clumsily reply, he quickly found himself with a steaming mug shoved pointedly into his hands. She gestured at it sternly and he gave her a meek nod, sipping at the tea with a grimace. “guess i don’t deserve any honey today, huh.”

Edge let him take another presumably bitter sip, his pretty face twisting into a grimace, before retrieving the honey jar himself. He held it out of reach as Rus reached for it eagerly, instead spooning a healthy dollop into his cup.

Behind him, Bonnie huffed, and he glanced over to see her signing, smugly, Spoiled.

He turned to face her, his back to Rus as he signed discreetly, He deserves a little spoiling. After the confrontation earlier with Toriel and Gaster, they all did and he would have to make sure that Undyne and Red got their share later.

“please, go ahead and trash talk about me,” Rus said behind him, “i’ll just sit here and pretend i don’t notice. alone. rejected.”

He didn’t sign and a mouth without lips did not lend itself to lipreading, but Bonnie’s expression still softened as her good eye flicked to him. He looked smaller bundled up in his oversized blanket and the aura of pathos around him would have been obvious were they blind and deaf.

Bonnie made a rough, fussing sort of sound and turned back to the stove where the rich scent of broth was starting to rise. She had plenty of experience tending to foolish researchers that spent too much time outside while wrapped up in their work and knew well how to handle them. He could certainly trust Rus in her care and Edge ignored the clamoring urge in his soul to not let Rus out of his sight again. He pressed a light kiss to the top of his skull, felt Rus go still beneath the touch.

“Stay here,” Edge said softly, “and get warmed up. I’ll be right back.”

Rus was already trying to stand, his blanket sagging from his shoulders. “but—”

“No buts. Stay here,” Edge stressed. “You need to get your core temperature up, that’s an order.” He tucked the blanket back around Rus. It was true, but it was also a handy excuse. It might be best that he spoke to Alphys alone first to voice his suspicions. The last thing they needed was for him to pull another disappearing act, especially without any outdoor gear on. He brushed his fingertips against Rus’s cheekbone, relieved to note he already seemed much warmer, and said, “I won’t be gone long.”

Rus reluctantly nodded and Edge left him to Bonnie’s somewhat tender mercies and headed for the lab.

It was no surprise to find Alphys waiting for him. For once, her ever present headphones were off and there was no perky anime episode playing on a nearby screen, an anomaly in a monitor bank that was only showing the local cameras. She was sitting in her office chair, her clawed hands clasped loosely in her lap and she looked up when Edge walked in, her eyes anxious behind her glasses. She opened her mouth and Edge shook his head, mouthing, “Not here.”

He jerked his head towards the door and she nodded, following as he led the way back out. Then it was a question of where to go. His own rooms were compromised, Rus had been in them several times, and he couldn’t trust any of the common areas. He settled for a little used storage room, unlocking it to herd Alphys inside where the two of them were surrounded by towering shelves of neatly labeled boxes.

Alphys shivered, wrapping her arms around her torso. She preferred a higher temperature than most of the station was kept at and storage rooms were not well heated.

“I h-heard everything in the rec room,” she said without preamble. “Everything th-the queen and Rus’s brother said.”

“Good,” Edge said approvingly, “so we don’t need to dance around the terms of Toriel’s promise.” Adding in a little soul damage from breaking a magic binding was not the icing he wanted slathered on this particular cake. Useful as well, that at least one of them weren’t bound by its terms. “So you know that he was looking for information on the Core.”

She nodded, “I-it is possible that he found the plans in the old royal scientists notes. I m-made my own when Asgore p-promoted me, b-but the old notes were still in the Hotland lab.” She hung her head, “I d-didn’t think to t-take them with me when we l-l-left.”

“Understandable,” Edge said gently. “Why would you if they weren’t needed? But they’ve been in our world for two years and he conveniently found what he was looking for only a few weeks after Rus came here. That’s one hell of a coincidence, don’t you think?”

She nodded unhappily. Tears were standing out in her eyes as she struggled to ask, “Rus w-was in the lab with me a b-bunch of times. D-do you think th-that, d-do you th-think, y-you, th-that he--?”

A fine mist of spittle sprayed as she labored with words that refused to come, and while Edge would normally never interrupt her, he couldn’t bear to force her to keep trying.

“I don’t, or at least I don’t think he was aware if it was him.” Edge lowered his voice, “If we have a security leak, we need to find it. The Core information isn’t the only thing I’m concerned about.” Alphys’s experiments were meant for bettering their own home and perhaps eventually the world, but if it came to that, it was her right to the achievement and no other.

“My p-private research folders are locked down, b-but, there’s a few things on the main servers.” A determined glint shown in her watery eyes, “I’m on i-it.”

“Good. If you can find Red, get him to help.” Alphys was an excellent engineer, but Red was the real hacker on their team. If they’d somehow been infiltrated, he’d find it and if she didn’t find him, then Edge would. His brother had secrets of his own and Edge’s willingness to allow it was coming to an end.

He’d always known Red worked briefly with the royal scientist before Alphys and that there had been a falling out of some sort about it, enough that Red abandoned his PhD to work as a lowly sentry rather than return to the labs. It wasn’t until they’d come to surface that Red dusted off his original career path and even now, he tended to avoid Alphys’s lab, preferring to meet with her anywhere else.

That much Edge knew. What he didn’t know was how Red was so familiar with the portal machine Gaster mentioned or how he knew they needed Rus to use it. From his brother’s sickly reaction to the mere mention of it, it would not be a pleasant conversation. But it was a necessary one, they needed answers and he’d rather have them from Red than risk making more promises to Toriel.

Alphys set out back to the lab at a hasty waddle and Edge turned towards the kitchen, intending to check on Rus again. Before he could take a single step, the sound that carried through the hallways froze him in his tracks. A high-pitched scream, broken and garbled but the terror was undeniable. He didn’t think, running towards the kitchen and pushing roughly past anyone who came out, ignoring their confused, fearful questions of ‘what was that?’

He pushed open the dining room door with enough force to make it bang against the opposite wall, slowing at the kitchen door as he looked through the narrow window at the scene inside.

Gaster was standing in the doorway nearly blocking Edge’s view, but he could see Bonnie over his shoulder, the mad, reddened tint to her glare as she brandished a chef’s knife in his direction. Held behind her was Rus, backed into a corner and he could see the panic on his face, his mouth moving with words that Bonnie couldn’t hear.

Gaster’s hands moved, signing, and whatever he said was very much the wrong thing. Bonnie let out another unearthly cry and shook her head, her scarred ears tousling around her shoulders, and the shrill pain and fear in that shriek needing no explanation. Something was horribly wrong and there was no time to guess at what, this situation needed defused before someone ended up a pile of dust.

Cautiously, Edge pushed open the door and stepped inside, keeping both hands raised and clearly visible. The knife point flashed in his direction and Bonnie’s wild glare gave no indication that she recognized him.

“Easy,” Edge soothed. He stepped in front of Gaster, careful to keep out of range of that knife as he signed slowly and precisely. “Bonnie, it’s me, Edge. Easy, now, you know I would never hurt you or Rus, don’t you? You know me.”

Some glimmer of sanity seeped back into her unscarred eye. She blinked slowly, the tip of the knife wavering as she lowered it.

Only to jerk back up as Gaster blustered out indignantly, “As if I’d hurt my own brother! This is ridiculous!”

“Shut up,” Edge said, never changing his gentle, easy tone. “Unless you’d like to add some extra holes to the ones you already have.”

He heard the sharp click of teeth closing together behind him and tried again, his gaze never leaving the gleaming metal of the knife as he stepped closer. Rus kept perfectly still behind her, letting Edge talk her down. “Bonnie. Come on, put the knife down. You’re safe here, he’s safe. Didn’t I promise you that when we came here? That I would protect us all, that this would be a safe place for us. Haven’t I always kept my promises?”

She nodded slowly. Tears were running from her good eye, the scarred one only staring out, milky white and sightless. The knife began lowering again and Edge reached for it slowly, telegraphing every move. Only for two of Gaster’s hand constructs that were hanging in the air to swiftly move, reaching for Rus where he was still crammed into the corner behind Bonnie.

Rus cried out, too late, “no, dings, don’t!”

With a raw, ragged cry, Bonnie lashed out, slashing through one of the hands. It dissipated with a puff of purple magic even as Gaster yelped aloud, staggering back against the door as Bonnie tried to lunge past Edge.

He caught hold of her around the waist with one arm, yanking her off balance. The two of them toppled to the floor, Bonnie shrieking and ungainly, and Edge prayed silently that his evenings sparring with Undyne helped keep his skills honed enough for this. He stopped thinking then, on autopilot as years of training took control. He twisted enough to bring his knee down sharply on her wrist, forcing Bonnie to release the knife. She shrieked and tried to hold on, but he was relentless, the bones under his knee close to snapping as it finally fell from her fingers. It clattering to the tile and Edge batted it away, sending it spinning underneath one of the countertops as he caught hold of her wrists, yanking both her hands up between her shoulder blades and pinning her to the floor. Even that didn’t stop her, she heaved and fought under him, teeth gnashing and nearly throwing him off as she struggled to crawl at Gaster, who’d backed into a corner to watch foolishly with wide, fearful sockets instead of taking the chance to escape out the door.

Then Rus darted in between them, falling to his knees in front of Bonnie as he signed frantically. “stop! please!” Rus pleaded. Tears were streaming from his sockets, pale orange stains against white bone. “he’s my brother, it’s all right!”

Bonnie’s struggles slowed, but instead of being reassured, her expression dissolved into horror, staring at Rus with a gaze that was half-wounded, half-scarred emptiness. She began to fight again, this time not to get to Gaster, but a frantic struggle to get away. Edge let her go before she could hurt herself and she scrambled to her feet, casting a last terrified look at Rus and Gaster before fleeing into the pantry, the door slamming behind her.

Rus sagged down and covered his face with shaking hands, tears leaking out from beneath. Gaster came out from his corner and knelt by his brother, sliding an arm around his slim, shaking shoulders as he quietly sobbed. Edge resisted the urge to push him away and take his place.

“What in blazes was that all about?” Gaster huffed. Over his shoulder, two disembodied hands signed furiously, “I came in for a simple cup of coffee and she attacked me! Do you regularly employ psychotics?”

Rus’s head jerked up and wiping at his tear-stained face impatiently as he pulled away from his brother with a scowl. “fucking hell, dings, it’s not like that!”

“Watch your language!”

Edge nearly offered an entire barrage of language for this bastard to deal with. Before he could, a voice spoke up from the doorway.

“matter of fact, we do.” They all turned in unison to the door to see Red standing there, hands tucked into his pockets, his sunglasses on and his knit cap carefully in place. His grin was humorless and cold, sharpened teeth gleaming in the glare of the overhead lights. “want another demonstration?”

Gaster returned his furious glare with one of his own, chin stiffly lifted, “Why, I never!”

Red’s grin only widened. “glad i could pop your cherry, then.”

“That’s enough!” Edge snapped.

“yeah, it is. ‘scuse me.” Red strolled past them all where they were still on the floor, sidestepping around them as casual as a day in the park. Him treading on Gaster’s hand was definitely deliberate and Edge didn’t mind it at all. Red buttonhooked into the pantry, yanking the door shut behind him, and that left the three of them sitting together on the kitchen floor.

The sudden hiss of a pot boiling over broke the painful silence. Edge stood, nearly staggering over to the stove to turn off the burner and drop a lid on the pot. Perhaps Bonnie would be able to salvage whatever it was. Once she salvaged herself, that was.

He turned back to Rus and Gaster, their matching pale faces, and was torn. He needed to check on Red and Bonnie, but leaving Rus alone with Gaster felt wrong, brother or not.

One corner of Rus’s mouth quirked up, a resigned smile and he jerked his head towards the pantry door. “go on, i’ll stay right here.”

Gaster said nothing, only grunted as Rus jammed an elbow into his side before signing reluctantly, “I’ll go back to my assigned room. With my coffee, thank you very much.”

Good enough. Edge nodded curtly and went to the pantry door, hearing Rus sighing behind him, “bro, you have the world’s shittiest timing—"

The pantry was darker than the kitchen, only a single bare bulb lighting the room. The walls were lined with shelves of canned goods, jarred sauces and homemade jellies, industrial-sized bags of flour, pasta, and beans. In the furthest corner, Bonnie lay curled up on the floor, her sides heaving as she shuddered. Next to her, Red was sitting cross-legged, signing to her as he spoke, each gesture slow and soothing.

“it ain’t the same guy, buns.” Red told her. “i’m tellin’ ya, it ain’t.”

She shifted enough to stab an accusing finger at Red. The fur on her face was matted and wet.

“nah, i ain’t bullshitting you,” Red said, “i’m telling it straight, it ain’t him. i get it, gave me a helluva jolt too when i laid eyes on ‘im, but he ain’t old enough, not even close. that guy ain’t more’n a few years older than the fashion victim, it can’t be him.” He reached out and settled a sharp-fingered hand on her shoulder, giving her a little shake before drawing back to sign again. “he’s dead, buns, dead and dust, long gone for years now. yeah?” He waited, endlessly patient, until she slowly nodded. “he can’t hurt us anymore, get me? can’t hurt anyone at all.”

Edge watched in disbelieving silence as Bonnie unfurled from the corner and crawled over to Red, nearly collapsing against him with a sob. She buried her face into his shoulder, smearing his jacket with all the fluids that came with her agonized weeping and Red only held her. He glanced at Edge, utterly unconcerned as though this were a weekly event and not the first moment he’d ever seen Bonnie and Red set aside their endless antagonisms of each other in an embrace.

“What the hell was that all about?” Edge asked in a furious whisper.

“not now, little brother,” Red said absently. He ran a hand down Bonnie’s head, smoothing the ruffled fur on her ears down.

Not good enough, not by far, not when his chef abandoning her duties for attempted murder. “I want an explanation.”

“and you’ll get one,” Red said, testiness creeping into his voice. “we’ll get to it, but there’s more important shit goin’ on right now. for starters, go get that gap-faced fucker out of the kitchen and keep him out until it’s time for him to get back on the chopper. he can eat in his room and if he don’t like it, he can fucking starve. she don’t need to be seeing his ugly mug again.”

On that they could agree. Edge nodded curtly and spun on his heel, ready to escort their guest back to his borrowed quarters and this time, he’d ensure he stayed there.

Gaster is dead, Red told him once. A different Gaster, one from this world. Gaster is dead, long live Gaster, Edge thought sourly as he headed out to deal with this version of a person he’d never met.

tbc

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Humans are Space Orcs “Snow”

Another suggestion you guys gave me :) Hope you like it! 

Maroz 324’s sky was cold and blue overhead. It’s distant binary stars hung high in the sky over the flat, cold alien landscape painted in shades of blue and white. No footprints, or tracks of any kind crossed it’s surface, and remained that way until the shuttle roared down from the bright morning sky and towards the chilled surface.

The GA (Galactic Assembly’s( scientific landing crew felt the weight of the ship as it settled onto the ice, and unbuckled themselves from their seats turning towards the wall to grab their gear. The crew consisted of two Vrul, one Tesraki and a Rundi as it usually was…. That was all accept for the humans, who ducked through the door and into the room, tall and menacing with their forward facing eyes and glittering white teeth.

The human pilot, wearing an eyepatch, and accompanied by a Vrul and Drev of his own paused in the doorway, “We ran some diagnostics on the planet surface. The ice is made mostly of well…. Water which is obviously a good thing for us. As for temperature and atmospheric readings, we have mostly nitrogen, bu at least 21% oxygen. Not a whole lot of carbon. Outside reading on the ship shows that there seems to be no liquid water present on the surface, and as such indicates no bacterial presence, though that may mean nothing at this point. Temperature is a balmy -20 degrees Fahrenheit or -28 degrees celsius.

“Balmy, is this your humor, human?” one of the scientists wondered pulling on a contained environment suit with respirator, temperature control, and a crap-load of other life support equipment, “Subzero temperatures make this planet a deathtrap, unlivable. An extremely hostile environment.”

The human just smiles a calm smile,“Balmy at this point means, wow my face isn’t going to freeze off and shatter upon contact with the air.”

“But ... that's exactly what -20 means.” 

Behind him, the other humans were falling into the room pulling on multiple layers of clothing. The human before them did the same. Two pairs of pants, and boots, and then another strange fibrous layer, and then a large fluffy jacket above that. There seemed to be no room for life support aboard their uniforms. In fact, the scientists were skeptical whether the suits were airtight enough not to lose air rather than contain it. The human pulled on a cap over his head and delicate ears, which were sure to freeze in the cold. There was no question that humans weren't meant for low temperatures, seeing as they lost heat quickly, and had no hair to keep them warm.

That might be why it seemed as if their gear was so primitive…. Perhaps because they had to develop subzero life support systems early on. The original human pulled on two pairs of gloves flexing his fingers inside the suit before donning a strange set of eyewear which he perched atop his head.

As far as they could tell ,he wore no respirator, and there was nothing protecting his eyes from freezing inside his head. The rest of the scientific group had donned their gear…. The same gear they would have worn in the vacuum of space, and then motioned towards the airlock. The humans shuffled forward with a sort of swishing squeaking noise, and the scientists followed behind them. The lead human carried a specimen tube on his back with another vrul encased on the inside looking surprisingly bored as if he was used to the human’s atics by this point. 

They were growing rather nervous watching them, “Aren't you going to put on your helmets?” one of them wondered through the intercom.

The humans looked down at him. Through their noses and mouths were covered by strange fibrous material, the way their eyes scrunched hinted at amusement.

Behind them, the airlock hissed shut, “Why would we do something like that.”

The human hit the button and the cabin depressurized. The scientists looked on in horror expecting humans to fall to the ground dead, but they seemed more than ok. One of them walked towards the door as a decontamination spray bathed them in a fine layer of mist. The door lurched open with a clunk, and a wave of what must have been freezing cold air flooded into the cabin.

Together, the scientists looked up in shock expecting the human’s eyes to immediately freeze and shatter inside their skulls, or at least to see their skin turn blue. No such thing happen, together, the humans walked out into the snow with a soft crunch crunch. To their shock, the main human pulled the material down from his mouth, and then breathed deeply. Hot air plumed from his mouth in smoke like rings.

“Ah…. nothing like a little cold to invigorate the self.” he took another deep breath. For a moment they stared on in surprise, shock and awe, that was before the man began to cough violently doubling over for a moment, probably ready to keel over and die.

The other humans began to laugh at him.

HE pulled the material up over his face, still coughing, “Note to self, air very dry, lungs on fire,.”

The scientists stared on in wonder as the human quickly recovered.

“What…. But…. how/”

The human turned to look at him with a raised eyebrow, “Are you kidding. Where I come from it can get -40 degrees towards the beginning of the year. So cold you can turn boiling water into water vapor in seconds.”

“But ... but how…. You have no fur.”

“What do you think the jacket is for.”

“But your lungs.”

The human reached up and prodded at his nose with a hand, “That’s what this puppy is for keeps the air humid and warm for the lungs. I advise breathing through the nose in cold situations rather than the mouth.

“Your eyes….”

“Tons of blood flow, and there are nice and cozy inside my sull, stop worrying so much.”

He turned towards the planet hands on his hips, “I don’t know about you boys and girls, but I would consider this planet habitable, at least worth harvesting water from. So maybe some sort of base here.”

The scientists just stared as the (life support-less) humans marched into the snow.

“Think about it, one of the humans muttered watching as the scientists took their readings, “No one has ever set foot here…. Ever.” 

The lead human tapped his chin with a musing expression, “Mmm ... good point.” It was then that he left off a strange animal bugle and ran straight onto the tundra hopping and dancing and running around in circles on the white plane of ice and snow almost slipping and falling on more than one occasion. It didn’t take long before the other humans were running after him engaging in primitive and aggressive play with each other. 

A human took a running start and then dug his heels into the icy snow going skidding past another human who had flopped down on her back to open and close her arms and legs while laughing. 

A human leaped over her and then went rolling into the snow sending an explosion of white powder up after him rolling to a stop only to copy the woman before. The scientists, who should have been collecting samples, just stared on in wonder and confusion as the humans happily played in the snow and ice.

Two humans tackled another one and forced his face into the snow before scampering away only to be chased by their snowy counterpart whose warm skin was melting the snow on his face only to have it freeze against his skin. 

“What are they doing.” One of the scientists asked in wonder.

The Vrul inside his test tube sighed, “They are frolicking I believe is the term. Humans love snow, or at least some humans love sow. That one there is making a snow angel, those ones there just performed what is called a ‘whitewash’.”

The scientists turned to the Vrul hunkered down inside his specimen tube, “how do you know all of this?”

He sighed “The first time I visited earth, it was during a blizzard.”

“You’ve been to earth!” They exclaimed in unison.

“More than once unfortunately.” He droned watching as one human snuck up on another with a handful of snow shoving it in their face when they weren’t expecting it. He came over sputtering and spitting snow out of his mouth, “Ok, Ok, this means war.” The aliens looked on with worried expressions as the human trudged over to the ship where the heat of the engines, still cooling had melted a plot of snow in a wide circle around the craft. He dug his hand in towards the edge scooping up a handful of snow and began packing it together.

Together the scientists came forward with curiosity, “How did you do that.”

The human looked u in puzzlement, holding out his ball of snow, “What…. You didn’t know that it sticks together.” he tossed the ball of snow up and down in a single hand, “Well my friends, you are about to be introduced to a human game that has been near and dear to our hearts from times of great antiquity.”

He turned towards where the other humans were still ‘frolicking in the snow’ and violently snapped his arm around in an overhand circle. 

There was an explosion of snow on the back of one of the human’s jackets and he stumbled nearly falling flat on his face. He turned eyes narrowed, and then came barreling towards the human who had thrown it.

“SNOWBALL FIGHT!”  

The entire tundra broke into chaos around the ship, and the scientists ducked for cover as balls of frozen liquid began flying through the air at incredible speed. The first human was nailed in the face ending up on his back in the snow holding a hand to his nose.

The other humans only stopped to see if he was ok before continuing on in their mission. Two took up position behind one of the struts holding the ship up, one of them throwing the snowballs, while the other made them and handed them off with unwavering accuracy. 

Eventually someone was smashed over the head with a snowball the size of his own head and the two ended up tumbling to the snow rolling end over end as they tried to stick each other’s faces in the cold, wet ground.

The scientists were making no headway and were forced to yell at the humans to knock it off hoping beyond hope that this was not some sort of primitive mutiny by the humans. It was so violent and aggressive.

“ALL OF YOU KNOCK IT OFF!” The humans stopped, and everyone turned to find the Vrul in the test tube with both of his arms crossed, just like the humans, “can’t you see you are ruining the  scientific field and contaminating it., “Either you play nice with each other, or you are all going back inside.” 

To their surprise, the humans slumped and muttered to each other giving the scientists time to go out and begin sampling away from the ship where the chaos had taken place. Behind them, two humans had begun rolling a massive ball of snow, which didn’t seem like it should have stuck together, but totally did. Another one sat in the snow and absently crunched on a snoball.

“Get that out of your mouth!” The vrul in the test tube demanded, “You don’t know what could possibly be in it.”

The human looked up at him licking his lips, “Don’t eat yellow snow.” He held out the snowball, “This snow is white.”

“It is from another planet.”

“What is yellow snow.” A returning scientist wondered, “I did not know that snow came in different colors.”

The human grinned malevolently, “Oh yes yellow snow. I know how to make it too. A serious process.” the other humans began giggling. The vrul inside his specimen tube did not seem pleased.

Behind them two of the humans had managed to stack three snowballs one on top of the other.

“What are you doing.

The humans turned to look, “Do you like it? This is our snowman.”

“Snowman?” They wondered in confusion. Another human walked up from behind with two snowballs and stuck them onto the middle snowball.

“Now it is a snow woman.” 

He received a face full of snow for his trouble.” 

Another human inched by on his back pushing himself through the snow on his back like some kind of strange arctic inch worm. The other humans, and aliens alike turned to watch him go, the humans with amusement and the aliens with confusion.

Apparently, despite being spawned in the dessert, or savanna, humans greatly enjoy the cold, when snow is involved, they will eat it, play with it, throw it at each other, bury themselves in it burrowing around like snow worms. No one understands why this is, by all rights it should kill them, but humans are adaptable basterds, and I suppose that the ability to live in a cold climate would give them no end to the water that they might need.

Still it is very strange, there is something about snow that brings out the primitive human, which will then display a strange sort of ritualistic play .

There will have to be more research done about this in the future, but for now it will have to remain a mystery. 

[prosaicswirl]

Day 8 of @short-story-slam! This one’s for my oc, Ciel, from my wip, Camisado. He’s a special forces soldier eventually learns what it means to truly be human, but not for a large portion of his life, and this is one of those times. It ties into the story, but when I actually get to that part of my wip, I doubt I’ll keep it as is. For now, he’s just questioning the role of morality in the armed forces. (~1.6k words)

Warnings: fighting, gunfights, injury, death, guns.

“I don’t care.”

“You have nothing to prove. Leave her out of your power struggle. She’s not a pawn you can use to promote yourself.”

Ciel went back to cleaning his gun. “That’s not why I’m fighting. I know I have nothing to prove, but I want a job well done. There’s a little girl’s life on the line, and these people want to hurt her.”

The scientist slammed his clipboard onto the table. “They’re hiring the wrong profile for the position and we both know it.”

“No, they’re hiring someone with a perfect record. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” He turned and walked outside.

“This is Control to Team one. Ciel, do you read me?”

“Loud and clear.”

The cold winter air was biting at the parts of his skin that wasn’t covered by his balaclava, and it made him think of his cozy office with the heater on and warm sweaters… and the giant pile of paperwork. Damn it.

“Tango one is somewhere in the east building. They have a meeting going on in three minutes. You need to break in once they’ve started and take out that room. You have thirteen in total, but Tango one, David Neilson, is your priority.”

“Understood, I was the one who briefed you all,” Ciel muttered, waving at his team to form up around him. “Team one approaching entry point alpha. Team two,” he nodded at the other team leader, “will be in contact.”

“Copy. And good luck.”

There was an uncomfortable crunching sound under his boots as they trekked up to the remote cottage. This was all routine. He swung his grappling hook a few times before throwing it up and onto the balcony railing. A quick tug to check its stability, and he nodded to the rest of his team. The trek upwards was nothing – it wasn’t even that long of a walk.

No, the complicated part came after they were on that balcony.

“Control to Team one and two. Our informant missed their check-in. Proceed with caution, the situation���s changed.”

He couldn’t help but to frown at that news, but he still had a job to do. He nodded at his team and whispered to Team two. “Team one in position.”

“Team two in position.”

“Breaching on the count of three. One, two, three!”

Two simultaneous explosions went off and he led the charge, jumping onto one of the terrorists and tackling him to the ground before he slammed the terrorist’s hand to the ground disarming and cuffing him at the same time. He then took aim at a few enemies firing at Team two, and watched the men fall.

“That’s three. Where are the others?” Ciel gave the order to fan out and crept forward to the doorway to the hallway. Team two backed up back into the office where they breached in, and searched from their entry point.

When they had cleared the washroom and a side closet, the calls came in. Fast.

“Friendly down! Team two’s perimeter is breached!”

“Control?” Ciel called out.

“Under heavy fire, we need back up!”

His team was still looking at their respective angle, waiting for their orders. “Where—”

“Team two is pinned between the main stairs and that main lobby.”

“Headed towards the west main stairs going to the west entrance for a flank.”

They filed down, new purpose in their steps as they moved towards the sound of gunfire.

“Control, we’re going to make contact.”

“Your orders are changed. Team two is priority.”

Ciel nodded once and entered the fight from behind. He was ducking in between glass shelves and metal crates piled high as he took aim at one after another. He only saw one Team two member fighting back, which… where was their leader?

“This is Ciel, I’m going in closer.” He ducked through the door and crouched behind an upturned table while he assessed the situation. His teammates were fine, they were still up and fighting, but he was worried about the other side. As he heard footsteps approaching his table, he swiped with his knife, bringing them down to their knees before he cuffed them to the table and slit the gun so it clattered to the ground. Without blinking, he cuffed the other wrist to a completely different table so the terrorist couldn’t reach for his guns. With an extra primary in his hand, he powered his way to the side where he engaged the final few in a battle to corner them.

This new angle took out two before the rest surrendered. “Control, are we taking prisoners?” He asked, dreading the answer. That familiar clench started while he waited for the response in the deadly silent room.

“Only if they’ve surrendered and pose no threat. We’re not losing more soldiers today.”

While he and the remaining Team to member aimed at the last few, the rest of Team one arrested the final two.

“Ciel, sir, we’re missing a team member. He pursued Tango one downstairs, and hasn’t returned.”

“Merde,” he muttered. This soldier in front of him was new. One of the most recent recruits to make it past training, and the bruises and scratches showed that. “Mark Ciel as in pursuit. Send my team down when they’re done up here.”

“Ciel, wait—”

“Radio silence,” he muttered and turned off the comms as he made his way downstairs.

It was colder. No heating in this area, he supposed. Made sense. In the distance, he could hear voices, one… in pain… no. Two in pain. And a third, shakier, panicked one.

“Don’t kill him, Andrew, we need to leave, not leave a body trail.”

“He’s… He’s seen our faces…”

“It doesn’t matter, he’s half unconscious, and still new. He won’t remember shit.”

“He killed mom and dad.”

“Not him. Someone else. Someone more experienced, you know this. We need to go before they find us too. If they take us… if they take you… I’ll never forgive myself. Now, help me up and let’s run.”

“He has green eyes, stop lying!”

Ciel paused, trying to pin down where they were exactly by just their voices. But in the large, empty garage, the echoes made that impossible.

Green eyes. He’s killed lots, he won’t deny that… but now was not the time to reflect.

Then when…?

Damnit, he needed to focus. There was a life on the line.

“You’re losing your mind, let’s calm down and leave.”

The more this aggressor talked, the younger he sounded. Perhaps if he could negotiate, and save both—

“He hurt you… So, he’ll hurt too.”

The gunshot rang out, and Ciel turned the corner, eyes and aim darting to the only standing figure.

“NO—”

The cry was cut short by his own bullets as the figure fell.

Before the body even hit the ground, Ciel was on the other terrorist, face still covered in camo paint, and now with his hands behind his back. That’s when he saw the awkward angle of his leg. Only when the other body was secure, did he run to his fellow soldier, and saw the blood trickling right below the vest…

“MEDIC!”

The warmth and stickiness of the blood didn’t even make him bat an eye as he pressed down on it. Too much blood. Too much… There were feet around him as more people filed in, though no one moved a muscle.

“Help him!” he screeched, looking around before looking back down at the body.

There was a hole in his head. He didn’t die from the gut wound.

Morality’s a bitch that seeps into your thoughts at the worst moments.

He had the time, the resources, the orders, and yet he waited until the shot… Damn, how could he think that anyone would shoot anything other than the head? By the time he rose onto just one knee, his hands were already shaking enough to warrant someone helping him up.

The terrorist on the ground was watching him though… “So… you’re the green eyed-monster that invaded his house and killed his parents… And now you’ve finished the job.”

“Tango one,” he didn’t acknowledge the name. Ciel took one step before being pulled back by one of his. “I was looking for you that night too.”

There was snow that night too when they stormed a cottage looking for this man. He remembers kicking through a window and raining the glass pieces onto the couple. There was blood shed that night too. One of his own was killed by a hidden gun under the pillow. No kid and no Tango one to be seen.

“He was fifteen. He didn’t even know what to do, but he knew that he was angry. He was just a kid.”

“So, you used that to turn him into your soldier? How honourable. Feed him anger until that’s all he saw… I had my orders. You gave him his.”

Now, the clean-up team had started taking away the boy’s body. One clean shot through the head. Textbook. A perfect example of what following orders was. Now if only his orders weren’t getting harder to follow.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

His footsteps echoed in bloodied hallways and empty battlegrounds. When he reached the confines of the camp, he shocked the base as he slammed his newly designed helmet to the ground, breaking the delicate machinery around it.

Ciel was perfect and didn’t need to prove himself. He knew what he was doing, and he was good at it. He makes no mistakes. Not in the eyes of the army at least.

[thornstocutyouwith]

Flashback

Send “Flashback” to have your muse see one of my muse’s bad memories

Sitting in the 'playroom' with the other children of his ranking, Karma had watched as his sister was wheeled back into the room. It had been several days since the last time he had seen her. And she had been looking far worse than when the last time he had seen her. Though all he could do was look away as the scientists had approached, looking over the other children that reside in the room. All of whom knew to not look at them in fear they might draw their attentions. Karma reached out toward a pillow laying on the floor before bringing it close to his chest and looking down at the book laying open in front of him. His eyes running along the words as he tried to look as uninteresting as a five year old reading a book with a pillow hugged toward their chest could be. A moment later however a woman came in after the scientists and pointed at him directly, saying 'that one'.  She then walked over and grabbed Karma by the wrist as she pulled him up to his feet. Karma had long ago learned not to fight back against these people, especially this woman. So calmly he had walked in line with her.

Being pulled into a room he frowned a bit as he saw a team finishing the prep for it. The woman turned to Karma then before stepping around to get a better look at him. She then told him to cheer up and that they were just going to replace his DNA with a creature they had accidentally let die many years before. And that his blood had seemed the most positive match that they had on hand. How that could have been possible, a five year old could not begin to imagine, or explain to himself why. Karma gave a confused look as the woman turned then and continued to explain to the rest of the team what she had been saying. Karma hadn't paid much attention after that. It was best not to, anyway. He had learned, like the others like him, not to interfere or be annoying with the scientists. Picking at the edge of his pillow he swayed slightly as he looked around the room. He had never liked being in these rooms. It always lead to nothing good for him. Mostly being stuck with needles and run through several tests that he had no idea what the point of them were.

Soon he was being picked up and and strapped into a chair hooked up with a few more needles and such that were going to be pricking and other such nonsense at his skin. In the time they had been in most in the medical field had no longer needed to even touch a subject in order to experiment on them...Or perform medical procedures, whatever.  Inhaling deeply Karma shut his eyes as he prepared himself for the familiar pain he was about to be in from the futuristic device. As he felt the prick of a needle in his vain and the world begin to fade away from then on as he drifted into darkness. And for what he could only imagine was quite some time he had stayed that way. And then he could hear things being destroyed all around him. Metal twisting and stone crunching together. But still he could not bring himself to wake up from his forced sleep. But he could feel someone carrying him away, to somewhere. Clearly he couldn't really say.  The motion had continued for a long time, with the noises of destruction happening all around him.

He could hear people screaming and the panting of the one who had been carrying him to wherever it was they were heading. Only to come to a sudden stop as he heard the female scientists voice in his ears saying 'you aren't taking him from me.' Followed by a mans voice saying 'I need my son, our daughter is a failure. Give him to me!'. But instead of answering the woman had seemed to start running in a different direction as the man screamed about the daughter causing the destruction currently going on around them.  It was around that time that Karma had started to feel strange, his body heating up gradually as more sounds of building breaking apart happened around him followed by another scream from the man, fading in the distance the farther the woman ran away with him in her arms. Only for her to gasp after a few moments before being tossed to the floor. It was hard to feel anything, the pain, or even emotion to register what was going on with him or that he had just been tossed onto the solid floor like a discarded doll. He then heard the woman say 'you are getting to hot, god dammit...did it fail?'

The heat he could feel building up in his body, about the only thing he could feel so totally at that moment, continued to build up. He could hear the woman commenting on how he was starting to melt the metal and stone around him. Then with a groan she turned and he could hear her run away from him then. After that the noises of destruction continued, the heat continued to build up and become almost too unbearable. Then a loud all consuming noise washed out from him before the world went silent around him. He didn't know if he had just fallen back asleep, for a brief moment, or if there was something more to the total silence around him. Then for real, he did end up falling asleep again, his body cooling down gradually. He couldn't say how long after that time went by. By the next time he was waking up his eyes fluttered open, no longer was he stuck in a state of absolute blindness, clearly because whatever had been injected into his body before had worn off.  Shifting he moved to push himself up from the floor where he was laying. Only to see a fat ugly looking man crouching in front of him.

It was then that he noticed the bars around him, a cage. He had been in a cage and was being transferred somewhere. Not the way the scientists would transport the experiments. No, Karma could see that this was something different, something that should not have been happening. As the ugly man reached into the cage and cupped his face in their hand, a smirk spread over their lips 'You are a mutant, you will fetch a pretty penny in the slums of New York, I bet you will.  Whether that be as a meat shield or a capable body guard, we will see." The ugly man then pulled away from the cage, tossing Karma's face a side and sending him stumbling back into the cage. Karma pout for a moment at this before turning to look at the pillow in his cage. Crawling toward it he lays his head on it before wrapping his arms around it as he tossed lightly with the sway of the transportation he was on toward the slums of new york.

[orbemnews]

It’s Crunch Time and Biden’s Climate Gambit Faces Steep Hurdles WASHINGTON — The linchpin of President Biden’s climate plan faces a perilous path through the Congress, as scientists say nations must move now to aggressively reduce the pollution that is heating the planet and the United States is trying to reassert a leadership role in that global effort. The central tool of Mr. Biden’s plan, known as a clean electricity standard, would require power companies to gradually ratchet up the amount of electricity they generate from wind, solar and other sources until they’re no longer emitting carbon dioxide. On paper, it seems a no-brainer. Some version of it has been approved by 29 states from Washington to Virginia. The idea is popular among Democratic and Republican voters. And experts say it is one of the most effective ways to cut the pollution from burning oil, gas and coal that is driving climate change. But in trying to push a nationwide standard through a bitterly divided Congress, Democrats are considering a politically risky move: attaching it to a fast-track maneuver known as budget reconciliation, which allows some bills to pass with a simple majority. That would require the support of all 50 Democrats, including Senator Joe Manchin of West Virginia, the state second only to Wyoming in coal production. Mr. Manchin, who chairs the Senate Energy Committee, has been noncommittal when it comes to a clean electricity standard. Republican leaders on Capitol Hill say forcing utilities to turn away from coal, oil and gas will mean higher electric bills. The fossil fuel industry says it will harm reliability of the power grid. Even supporters of the idea are at odds over how to design a national standard. And some Democrats question whether it’s aggressive enough. Much is at stake. Without meaningful climate legislation this year, Mr. Biden will be left with executive action, some of it sure to be challenged in court, to meet his ambitious goals to pivot the country away from fossil fuels and prove to the world the United States is serious about global warming. This year is “the last best chance for the world to get on a legitimate track,” said former Secretary of State John Kerry, Mr. Biden’s global climate envoy, during a recent interview in Rome, where he was meeting with European counterparts. A clean electricity standard is the best way at the moment to “make up for lost time” under former President Donald J. Trump, Mr. Kerry said. The last time Congress tried to enact major climate change legislation was 2009 when it failed to pass a complex market-based system to cut emissions. Democrats were trounced in the following midterm elections and lost the House, in part because of Republican claims that they were intent on driving up electricity costs. But the political landscape has shifted. Wind and solar are now cheaper than coal and natural gas. Americans also are witnessing the real-time consequences of climate-fueled disasters like wildfires in California and stronger hurricanes battering their communities. Democrats are more unified around tackling climate change than a decade ago, and Mr. Biden won the White House based in part on a promise to enact the most aggressive climate agenda in history. Perhaps most significantly, some major utilities are for the first time rallying around the idea of a clean electricity standard. In recent weeks, 13 publicly owned utilities announced support for an aggressive measure that would eliminate 80 percent of fossil fuel emissions from the sector by 2030. The American Public Power Association, which represents about 2,000 other public utilities, hasn’t taken a stand. But the Edison Electric Institute, which represents privately owned utilities and whose former president opposed a renewable energy standard in 2007, said it now supports a “well-designed” policy. “That is different than it has ever been before,” said Representative Diana DeGette, a Colorado Democrat who has been pushing for a national clean energy standard for more than a decade and is drafting a new version. Edison Electric Institute has opted to support a clean electricity standard, in part because its members so quickly met an objective set by the Obama administration to cut power plant emissions, said Emily Fisher, general counsel for the group. That goal, of cutting the sector’s emissions 32 percent below 2005 levels, was accomplished by 2020 — a decade ahead of schedule. “I often wish that I could get in a time machine and talk to myself in 2010,” Ms. Fisher said. “I think I would have told her to be more excited about the future. Sometimes in those early conversations it seemed like the future was going to be really hard to accomplish. We don’t feel that way anymore.” Republican leaders, however, shrugged off signs of growing industry support and indicated they intend to fight Mr. Biden’s plan. “We all want to make energy as clean as we can as fast as we can, and do it in ways that don’t raise costs for American families,” said Senator John Barrasso of Wyoming, adding that he is focused on energy prices and jobs in energy industries for his constituents. “But what the president is proposing is raising energy costs significantly.” Studies on the effects that clean electricity standards have had on consumer prices are mixed. Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory and the National Renewable Energy Laboratory evaluated several programs and concluded that they raised electricity bills by an average of 2 percent in 2017. But more recent research from the University of Chicago of various clean electricity standards in 29 states and the District of Columbia found that, seven years after imposing a standard, prices rose by about 11 percent. That study was also criticized by many energy experts who argued costs may increased because of other policies approved at the same time as a clean electricity standard. After he returned the United States to the 2015 Paris climate accord, President Biden committed to cut carbon emissions roughly in half by 2035 and also eliminate fossil fuel emissions from the power sector by that year. The White House has called for a clean electricity standard as part of its $2.3 trillion infrastructure package. It has preferred that approach over a tax on carbon emissions, a method that many economists say would be the most efficient way reduce emissions but is unpopular among many Republicans and some progressive Democrats. Negotiations between the White House and Republican congressional leaders over the infrastructure package are continuing. Meanwhile, Democrats are debating the best strategy to pass a clean electricity standard, several House and Senate aides said. The administration has offered few details about such a standard, other than it should include nuclear energy and should also incorporate technology to capture and store carbon dioxide emissions, which could allow some fossil fuel plants to continue operating. Energy experts said both nuclear energy and carbon capture will be required to reduce emissions. They also will be critical to gaining Republican support, if there is any to be had. The Edison Electric Institute also remains concerned about some of the targets being discussed as well as ensuring the reliability and affordability of electricity, Ms. Fisher said. One of the most consequential questions to be decided by lawmakers is whether to characterize natural gas as a “clean energy,” something the gas industry wants. When burned, natural gas produces half the carbon dioxide of coal. But it releases methane, a greenhouse gas far more potent than carbon dioxide (though it has shorter staying power in the atmosphere). Much of that gas has been extracted through the controversial method known as fracking. Progressives have indicated they will fight any measure that includes anything other than renewable energy like wind, solar and geothermal power. “You can’t have a truly clean energy system that includes fracked gas,” said Mitchell Jones, policy director at Food and Water Watch, one of more than 600 environmental group that signed a May 12 letter to House and Senate leaders. The group rejected gas “with or without carbon capture sequestration” and what it called other “false solutions” like nuclear. Other supporters of climate legislation like Senator Sheldon Whitehouse of Rhode Island, said they worry the administration’s plan is too narrowly focused on the power sector. While electricity generation was responsible for 25 percent of the greenhouse gases emitted by the United States in 2019, the transportation sector produced about 29 percent, according to the Environmental Protection Agency. Manufacturing and industry produced another 23 percent. Commercial and residential buildings were responsible for 13 percent, and agriculture contributed 10 percent, the agency said. Mr. Whitehouse wants a package of solutions, including a tax on carbon emissions. But he said Democrats understand they have a short window during which to act and it is closing fast. “ The danger to us, primarily, is that we get into our traditional Democratic circular firing squad and quarrel with each other rather than taking on the common enemy of carbon emissions and a very malign fossil fuel industry apparatus,” Mr. Whitehouse said. “This is a really important moment and perhaps our last chance.” While some Republicans have supported clean electricity standards in the past, environmental activists said they don’t believe Democrats can win over 10 GOP senators, the number needed to break a filibuster. Senator Mitt Romney of Utah in a recent interview said he is “looking at” a clean electricity standard but believes a tax on carbon pollution is a better approach. Senator Susan Collins of Maine said she was willing to “review” a federal standard but also made no commitment. Without Republican help, Democrats would have to try to pass a clean electricity standard through budget reconciliation. That approach requires only a simple Senate majority, but the legislation must be crafted in a way that changes federal spending or revenue. And they would have to win over Mr. Manchin, who has expressed concern both about using the reconciliation process as well as a clean energy standard. Scott Segal, a senior partner at Bracewell LLP, which represents utilities and other energy industry clients, said Democrats could undermine their efforts on climate change by pushing legislation through without bipartisan support. “If they try to jam a clean electricity standard through on reconciliation, I think they would likely lose a strong handful of moderate Democrats, and they’d have no chance to pick up moderate Republicans,” he said. Mr. Kerry said he recently dined with “an unnamed Republican senator who told me outright that he is intending to try to pass a clean electricity standard and believes that there is a critical mass of colleagues who will try to do this because it makes sense.” None, however, have come forward publicly. Jason Horowitz contributed reporting from Rome. Source link Orbem News #Bidens #Climate #crunch #Faces #Gambit #Hurdles #steep #Time

[lodelss]

Holly Jean Buck | an excerpt adapted from After Geoengineering: Climate Tragedy, Repair, and Restoration | Verso | 2019 | 24 minutes (6,467 words)

December in California at one degree of warming: ash motes float lazily through the afternoon light as distant wildfires rage. This smoky “winter” follows a brutal autumn at one degree of warming: a wayward hurricane roared toward Ireland, while Puerto Rico’s grid, lashed by winds, remains dark. This winter, the stratospheric winds break down. The polar jet splits and warps, shoving cold air into the middle of the United States. Then, summer again: drought grips Europe, forests in Sweden are burning, the Rhine is drying up. And so on.

One degree of warming has already revealed itself to be about more than just elevated temperatures. Wild variability is the new normal. Atmospheric patterns get stuck in place, creating multiweek spells of weather that are out of place. Megafires and extreme events are also the new normal — or the new abnormal, as Jerry Brown, California’s former governor, put it. One degree is more than one unit of measurement. One degree is about the uncanny, and the unfamiliar.

If this is one degree, what will three degrees be like? Four?

At some point — maybe it will be two, or three, or four degrees of warming — people will lose hope in the capacity of current emissions-reduction measures to avert climate upheaval. On one hand, there is a personal threshold at which one loses hope: many of the climate scientists I know are there already. But there ’s also a societal threshold: a turning point, after which the collective discourse of ambition will slip into something else. A shift of narrative. Voices that say, “Let’s be realistic; we’re not going to make it.” Whatever making it means: perhaps limiting warming to 2°C, or 1.5, as the Paris Agreement urged the world to strive for. There will be a moment where “we,” in some kind of implied community, decide that something else must be tried. Where “we” say: Okay, it’s too late. We didn’t try our best, and now we are in that bad future. Then, there will be grappling for something that can be done.

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This is the point where it becomes “necessary” to consider the future we didn’t want: solar geoengineering. People will talk about changing how we live, from diet to consumption to transportation; but by then, the geophysics of the system will no longer be on our side. A specter rears its head: the idea of injecting aerosols into the stratosphere to block incoming sunlight. The vision is one of shielding ourselves in a haze of intentional pollution, a security blanket that now seems safer than the alternative. This discussion, while not an absolute given, seems plausible, if not probable, from the vantage point of one degree of warming — especially given that emissions are still rising.

You may have heard something about solar geoengineering. It’s been skulking in the shadows of climate policy for a decade, and haunting science for longer than that, even though it’s still just a rough idea. But it is unlikely you imagined solar geoengineering would be a serious topic of discussion, because it sounds too crazy — change the reflectivity of the earth to send more sunlight back out into space? Indeed, it is a drastic idea.

We are fortunate to have rays of sunlight streaming through space and hitting the atmospheric borders of our planet at a “solar constant” of about 1,360 watts per square meter (W/m2) where the planet is directly facing the sun. This solar constant is our greatest resource; a foundation of life on earth. In fact, it’s not actually so constant — it was named before people were able to measure it from space. The solar constant varies during the year, day to day, even minute to minute. Nevertheless, this incoming solar energy is one of the few things in life we can count on.

Much of this sunlight does not reach the surface; about 30 percent of it gets reflected back into space. So on a clear day when the sun is at its zenith, the solar radiation might reach 1,000 W/m2. But this varies depending on where you are on the globe, on the time of day, on the reflectivity of the surface (ice, desert, forest, ocean, etc.), on the clouds, on the composition of the atmosphere, and so on. Because it’s night half the time, and because the sun is hitting most of the earth at an angle, the average solar radiation around the globe works out to about 180 W/m2 over land. Still, this 180 W/m2 is a bounty.

The point of reciting all these numbers is this: solar geoengineering amounts to an effort to change this math. That’s how a researcher might look at it, anyway.

From one perspective, it sounds like complete lunacy to intentionally mess with something as fundamental as incoming solar radiation. The sun, after all, has been worshipped by cultures around the world: countless prayers uttered to Ra, Helios, Sol, Bel, Surya, Amaterasu, and countless other solar deities throughout the ages. Today, many still celebrate holidays descended from solar worship. And that worship makes sense — without the sun, there would be nothing. Even in late capitalism, we valorize the sun: people search for living spaces with great natural light; they get suntans; they create tourist destinations with marketing based on the sun and bring entire populations to them via aircraft. Changing the way sunlight reaches us and all other life on earth is almost unimaginably drastic.

But there are ways of talking about solar geoengineering that normalize it, that make you forget the thing being discussed is sunlight itself. The most discussed method of solar geoengineering is “stratospheric aerosol injection” — that is, putting particles into the stratosphere, a layer of the atmosphere higher than planes normally fly. These particles would block some fraction of incoming sunlight, perhaps about 1 to 2 percent of it. Stratospheric aerosols would change not only the amount of light coming down, but also the type: the light would be more diffuse, scattering differently. These changes would alter the color of our skies, whitening them to a degree that may or may not be easily perceptible, depending on whether you live in an urban area. The distortion would also affect how plants and phytoplankton operate. Certainly, this type of intervention seems extreme.

And despite the extremity of the idea, it’s not straightforwardly irrational. First of all, solar radiation is already naturally variable; a single passing cloud can change the flux by 25 W/m2. What’s more, solar radiation is unnaturally variable. Global warming is caused by greenhouse gas emissions — the greenhouse gas molecules trap heat, creating an imbalance between the energy coming in and the energy going back out. Since 1750, these emissions have increased the flux another 2.29 W/m2. This disparity between incoming and outgoing energy is what scientists call “radiative forcing” — a measure of imbalance, of forced change, caused by human activity. That imbalance would actually be greater — just over 3 W/m2 — if not for the slight countervailing effect of aerosol emissions that remain close to the ground. Think about a smoggy day. The quality of the light is dimmer. Indeed, air pollution from cars, trucks, and factories on the ground already masks about a degree of warming. Total removal of aerosols — as we’re trying to accomplish, in order to improve air quality and human health — could induce heating of 0.5 to 1.1°C globally.

There will be a moment where ‘we’…say: Okay, it’s too late. We didn’t try our best, and now we are in that bad future.

So, from another perspective, because human activity is already messing with the balance of radiation through both greenhouse gas emissions (warming) and emitting particulate matter from industry and vehicles (cooling), it doesn’t sound as absurd to entertain the idea that another tweak might not be that significant — especially if the counterfactual scenario is extreme climate suffering. If you stretch your imagination, you can picture a future scenario where it could be more outrageous not to talk about this idea.

The question is, are we at the point — let’s call it “the shift” — where it is worth talking about more radical or extreme measures — such as removing carbon from the atmosphere, leaving oil in the ground, social and cultural change, radical adaptation, or even solar geoengineering?

Deciding where the shift — the moment of reckoning, the desperation point — lies is a difficult task, because for every optimist who thinks renewables will save the day, there is a pessimist noting that the storage capacity and electrical grid needed for a true renewable revolution does not even exist as a plan. For many people, it’s hard to tell how desperate to feel: we know we should be worried, but we also imagine the world might slide to safety, show up five minutes to midnight and catch the train to an okay place, with some last-minute luck. It can seem like the dissonance around what’s possible actually increases the closer we get to the crunch point; the event horizon. Some of this uncertainty is indeed grounded in the science. “Climate sensitivity” — the measurement describing how earth would respond to a doubling of greenhouse gas concentrations from preindustrial times — is still unknown. That means we don’t know precisely what impacts a given amount of greenhouse gas emissions will have.

However, basic physics dictates that this season of uncertainty is limited. The picture will become clearer as emissions continue, and as scientists tally up how much carbon is in the atmosphere. Nevertheless, examining the situation today provides useful insights that should be well known, but somehow are rarely discussed in venues other than technical scientific meetings.

At present, human activities emit about 40 gigatons (Gt) of carbon dioxide a year, or 50 Gt of “carbon dioxide equivalent,” a measure that includes other greenhouse gases like methane. (A gigaton is a billion tons.) Since the Industrial Revolution, humans have emitted about 2,200 Gt of CO2. Scientists have estimated that releasing another 1,000 Gt CO2 equivalent during this century would raise temperatures by two degrees Celsius — exceeding the target of the Paris Agreement — meaning that 1,000 Gt CO2 is, if you like, our maximum remaining budget (these are rough figures; it could be much less). Knowing that today roughly 50 Gt of carbon dioxide equivalent is emitted, it is evident that emitters are on track to squander the entire carbon budget within the next 20 years. Moreover, the rate of warming is still increasing. This means that if the rate of warming slows down yet emissions remain at today’s rate, in twenty years, two degrees of warming are essentially guaranteed.

What would it take to avoid this? To keep warming below two degrees, emissions will need to drop dramatically — and even go negative by the end of this century, according to scenarios assessed by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC). Let’s consider a typical “okay future” scenario; one that would provide for a decent chance of staying within two degrees, like the one represented last year in Science magazine by a graph of median values from 18 “good” scenarios assessed in the IPCC’s 2018 special report on 1.5°C of warming.

First, a typical “good future” scenario has emissions peaking around 2020, and then dropping dramatically. Dramatic emissions reductions are key to any scenario that limits warming.

Second, in an “okay future,” emissions go net negative around 2070. “Net negative” means that the world is sucking up more carbon than it is emitting. How is that done? While emissions can be zeroed via the mitigation measures we’re familiar with — using renewable energy instead of fossil fuels, stopping deforestation, halting the destruction of wetlands, and so on — to push emissions beyond zero and into negative territory requires a greater degree of intervention. There are two main categories of approach: biological methods, including using forests, agricultural systems, and marine environments to store carbon; and geologic methods, which typically employ industrial means to capture and store CO2 underground or in rock. Some approaches combine these, though: for instance, coupling bioenergy with carbon capture and storage.

But here, note a third point: in a “good future” scenario, carbon actually starts to be removed in the 2020s and 2030s, when emissions are still relatively high. Industrial carbon capture and storage (CCS) — the practice of capturing streams of carbon at industrial sites and injecting it into underground wells — is a crucial technique for accomplishing these levels of carbon removal. As of 2019, the world has only around twenty CCS plants in operation, a number that is almost quaint in scale. To begin removing carbon at the level required for a “good future” scenario implies scaling up the current amount of carbon stored by something like a thousandfold. By 2100, the world would be sequestering ten or fifteen gigatons of carbon dioxide equivalent. And the scale-up begins right away.

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In the graph of the “okay future” scenario, the gentle slope of declining greenhouse gases looks so neat and calm. It is a fantasy described in clean lines; in the language of numbers, the same language engineers and builders and technocrats speak. This language lends weight to the image, making it seem less fantastic. However, this scenario relies on carbon removal technology at a scale far beyond the demonstration projects being planned today. As the IPCC warned in its special report on 1.5°C, reliance on such technology is a major risk. But the same report indicated that all the pathways analyzed depended upon the removal of between 100 and 1,000 gigatons of carbon in total. In short, limiting warming to 2°C is very difficult without some use of negative emissions technologies — and 1.5°C is virtually unattainable without them.

Does this mean it is impossible to avert two degrees of warming? No. For we know plenty of practices that can be used to remove carbon. We can store it in soils, in building materials and products, in rock. After all, it’s a prevalent element upon which all life is based. It would be difficult to scale these practices under our current economic and political logic, as we’ll explore this book. But it’s technically possible to imagine a future where the excesses of the past (our present) are tucked away, cleaned up, like a stain removed.

*

Geoengineering talk often focuses on one moment — the decision to “deploy,” and how or whether publics will be a part of this decision. But looking at prospective decision points muddies this notion of a discrete decision. It’s also not clear exactly who these “decision makers” are. In much of our conversation about climate action, the citizen becomes a witness to history, to decision ceremonies of the powerful. Out of view are the backstories, the tiny actions that accumulated into a formal decision. It becomes hard to imagine otherwise — that geoengineering could be carried out in conversation with civil society, much less led by us.

Right now, geoengineering doesn’t exist. Indeed, the concept is an awkward catch-all that bears little correspondence with the things it purports to describe. The UK’s Royal Society laid out the term in a 2009 report, which assessed both carbon dioxide removal and solar geoengineering, also known as solar radiation management. (For a deeper understanding of how the concept of “geoengineering” came about, Oliver Morton’s book The Planet Remade and Jack Stilgoe’s book Experiment Earth are excellent resources.) Subsequent policy and scientific research adopted the Royal Society’s framing, though it’s quite possible that in the near future, the marriage of these two approaches will dissolve: a 2019 resolution brought before the United Nations Environment Assembly to assess geoengineering failed in part because it combined such different approaches. My hope is that “geoengineering” is a word that future generations will not recognize — not because they’re living it and it’s become an ordinary background condition, but because it’s a weird artifact of the early twenty-first-century way of seeing the human relationship with the rest of nature. Instead, I want us to contemplate what comes “after geoengineering” in the sense that it extends an invitation to think toward the end goals of geoengineering. “After geoengineering” also aims to evolve the conceptual language we use to apprehend what it means to intentionally change the climate: once “geoengineering” is a retired signifier, how do we understand these practices, and what does the new language and new understanding enable?

Even though climate engineering is mostly imaginary right now, it’s a topic that’s unlikely to disappear until either mitigation is pursued in earnest or the concept of geoengineering is replaced by something better; as long as climate change worsens, the specter is always there. In fact, some of the scarier scenarios result when geoengineering isn’t implemented until the impacts of climate change are even more extreme, and is therefore conducted by governments that are starting to fray and unravel. Looking at these fictional scenarios as they unfold prompts some hard questions about the optimal timing of geoengineering. Climate policy at large has been influenced by a “wait and see” attitude, where policymakers wait and see what kinds of economic damage it will cause before taking action. Research shows that even highly educated adults believe this is a reasonable approach, possibly because their mental models don’t properly apprehend stocks and flows. Climate change is a problem of carbon stocks, not carbon flows: the earth system is like a bathtub, filling up (an analogy used by climate modeler John Sterman and educator Linda Booth Sweeney). Reducing the flow of water into the bathtub isn’t going to fix our problem unless we’re actually draining it, too: the amount of emissions can be reduced, but greenhouse gas concentrations will still be rising. Wait-and-see is actually a recipe for disaster, then, because more water is flowing into the bathtub every year. Carbon removal increases the drain. It doesn’t make sense to wait and see if it’s needed. Moreover, it is possible that our capacity to carry out carbon removal — economically, politically, and socially — could actually be greater now than it will be in a climate-stressed future.

Solar geoengineering is trickier. A wait-and-see approach makes intuitive sense: let’s wait and see if society gets emissions under control in the next couple of decades, and let’s wait and see if scientists can get better estimates of climate sensitivity and sink responses. However, there are two key limitations to note here. First, scientists anticipate that doing the research on solar geoengineering could take at least twenty years, and possibly many decades. Second, we won’t know about some of these climate tipping points until we’ve crossed them. Imagine implementing a solar geoengineering program in order to save coastal megacities from rising seas — a plausible reason a society might try something like this. It would be desirable to do the solar geoengineering before warming reached levels where the sea level rise was locked in. But that year might only be known in hindsight, given that it’s a nonlinear system. For some, this is a rationale for at least starting geoengineering research right away. A counterargument is that research is a slippery slope, and doing the research makes it more likely that solar geoengineering will be deployed.

In much of our conversation about climate action, the citizen becomes a witness to history, to decision ceremonies of the powerful.

Whatever conclusion one arrives at in this debate, the main takeaway, for me, is this: There are certainly scenarios in which global society does figure out how to cut emissions to zero, albeit with much climate suffering (in the near future as well as our current present). Yet, if one thinks it’s plausible that there won’t be a significant start on this in the next decade, and that the risks of climate change are significant, it could be reasonable to look into solar geoengineering. And naturally one would want to avoid the worst-case and go for the better-case ways of doing it. There are crucial choices to be made about how it is done. For most climate engineering techniques, what is outrageous inheres not in the technology, but in the context in which it would be deployed.

Those contexts vary, but they all have two important elements. One is the counterfactual climate change scenario: How bad is climate change turning out to be, on a scale from pretty bad to catastrophic? The second is what is being done at the time to confront climate change, whether that be carbon removal, mitigation, adaptation — or nothing. These are very different futures. If a solar geoengineering program is to be ended on a meaningful timescale, it will rely on mitigation and carbon removal. If a regime begins solar geoengineering, it needs to keep putting those particles up there year after year, until carbon emissions are brought down. Thus, the hard thing isn’t beginning the project, but ending it: ensuring that what comes after geoengineering is livable. This is a battleground that’s currently obscured in most discussions of geoengineering.

The definitive story of the twenty-first century, for people working to combat climate change, may be captured in one graph: the rise of greenhouse gas emissions. The line features a dramatic, tension-laden rise — and, ideally, a peak, followed by a dramatic and then gentle downslope, a resolution that accords a feeling of restoration and completion. From Shakespeare to the novel to the life course, the exposition–conflict–climax–resolution–moral story arc is a classic one. It maps nicely onto a temperature-overshoot scenario, where emissions are temporarily high but come back down. This story line lands us, the challenged yet triumphant protagonist, with 2°C of warming at century’s end. These established narrative forms are how we know how to locate ourselves in an overwhelming situation; how we manage to narrate the task at hand. In these imaginaries of managing an overshoot via carbon removal, we risk simply mapping our familiar narrative form onto the problem.

As philosopher Pak-Hang Wong argues, geoengineering needs to be seen “not as a one-off event but as a temporally extended process.” It’s not about the hero’s moment of action, the climax. I would add that this re-visioning of geoengineering must be directed not just into the future, but into the past as well, thereby placing climate intervention into historical context. Future processes of both solar geoengineering and carbon removal will entail dealing with compensation or insurance for people who suffer loss and damage, working out ways to protect vulnerable people, working out who pays for it — and all that requires a reckoning with history, particularly with colonial histories of land appropriation, dispossession, and exploitation. On the international level, negotiators will have to delve into the histories of uneven development, carbon debt, and, yes, colonialism. Carbon removal can be viewed in terms of debt repayment. The addition of solar geoengineering on top of carbon removal would therefore be like living with the repo man always in the sky above you, reminding you what happens if the debt isn’t paid back. Financially, we are already living in a world of debt peonage, as Marxist geographer David Harvey points out; most of the population has future claims on their labor. Now future generations are going to have a double debt. It’s not just the decision to do geoengineering that matters; it’s how this carbon debt and carbon cleanup operation is taken care of, too. The details are everything.

In reality, the resolution of this narrative curve is going to involve struggles all along the way. The latter part of the work, the last half of the curve towards completion, may be tougher than the first, because decarbonizing the electricity sector by switching to solar panels is simply easier than dealing with “hard to mitigate” sectors or deep cultural changes, like decarbonization of aviation and industrial production, or reduction of meat consumption. Deciding to start geoengineering is a bit like deciding to get married. It’s not saying the vows that is hard, but doing the work of the marriage. “Tying the knot,” in reality, doesn’t actually mean that you’re going to stay together forever, despite the metaphor. You have to keep choosing your spouse, or the marriage deteriorates. Solar geoengineering, in particular, would be more like a relationship than a ceremony: and yet much of the treatment in the literature and the press focuses on the expensive wedding. We should instead be thinking more about the world after geoengineering, because climate engineering could be a means to very different ends.

Indeed, it has been difficult for environmentalists and the left to engage with either carbon removal or solar geoengineering in a forward-thinking way. Part of this is due to a fixation on the immediate need to see emissions peak — but part of it also has to do with some serious limitations in how we think.

Copenhagen, December 2009, 1°C / 34°F

The banners unfurled under the dreary skies read “Hopenhagen.” I crossed the plaza, pigeons scattering. A historic brick building loomed above, its rooftop scaffolding bearing the logo: “i’m loving it.” On the ground floor were a Burger King and KFC. Between this fast-food sandwich hung a three-story advertisement sponsored by “corporate citizens Coca-Cola and Siemens”: two young, blonde boys, skinny and pale, with fists in the air, ready to heft a burden. “Earth’s Bodyguards,” read the caption.

I waited in the cold with hundreds of bundled-up delegates and protestors for a train to the Bella Center, where the fifteenth session of the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change’s Conference of the Parties was taking place. We glided past a glassy office building with a several-story bright-green banner. “Stop climate change. Make COP 15 matter,” it instructed us in Helvetica Light, the logo of construction corporation Skanska beneath.

At the time, climate politics seemed haunted by the specter of green capitalism. We marched under the slogan System Change Not Climate Change. While I have only a few distinct memories of this summit, they portended something quite different than our green capitalist, ecologically modernized future.

Between breaks, delegates would spill out of the conference rooms and rush to treat-laden tables in the hallways in a near melee for the best desserts. A European diplomat in a suit and a young student both reached for the last chocolate on the table, and the man in the suit slapped the confection out of the younger man’s hand.

A retinue of men, dressed in suits, swept briskly through the corridor like a cold wind. The man in the center was the focal point; the rest flanked him, like a military formation. I flattened myself into the side of the hallway as they passed. It’s an unremarkable thing, people passing each other in a nondescript corridor, but I felt chilled. “Did you see Robert Mugabe? He’s here,” someone whispered to me a few minutes later.

A tent, in the rain, in the “free city” of Christiania. I listened to Naomi Klein and other activists muster the forces. We drank mulled wine to keep warm and waited for the police to sweep in with their water cannons and tear gas; there was a rumor that they were coming. (They came.)

There was a kind of power that crackled in the air. Every time it manifested, it surprised me. I was expecting a climate summit to be a rather stuffy and formal affair, filled with acronyms and technical jargon. The injunctions of green capitalism postered around the city seemed pleading, thin, compared to these older and more primal forms of power. Hugo Chávez, speaking at the summit, said that “a ghost is stalking the streets of Copenhagen…it’s capitalism, capitalism is that ghost.” Chavez declared, “When these capitalist gods of carbon burp and belch their dangerous emissions, it’s we, the lesser mortals of the developing sphere who gasp and sink and eventually die.” I can understand the sentiment — particularly when it comes to the unevenness of climate impacts and the brutality of the historical record. As ecological Marxist theory argues, capital accumulation and the treadmill of production is a central factor in global environmental degradation — a thesis I’m onboard with. Nevertheless, I don’t think that green capitalism was the ghost roaming those halls. Perhaps we were focusing on the wrong ghost.

Those of us schooled in keeping watch against green capitalism would naturally read geoengineering as capitalism’s next move in self-preservation. I’m skeptical of this, because I don’t see the evidence that capitalism is capable of acting in its own long-term benefit — especially not consciously, on the scale and temporality of mobilization that this intervention would require. But capital is something of a headless monster, incapable of this kind of macro-level, strategic, long-term thinking. In the face of what could be an existential crisis, innovation is flowing toward hookup apps and making sure porny advertising doesn’t get stationed next to famous brands. This is where capital’s attention and money is directed; as anthropologist David Graeber observes, technological progress since the 1970s has been largely in information technologies, technologies of simulation. Graeber notes that there was a shift from “investment in technologies associated with the possibility of alternative futures to investment in technologies that furthered labor discipline and social control” — in other words, it’s a big mistake to assume capitalism is naturally technologically progressive. In fact, he suggests, “invention and true innovation will not happen within the framework of contemporary corporate capitalism — or, most likely any form of capitalism at all.” I agree — we ’ve seen numerous terrific ideas since the 1970s in alternative energy, and even in carbon removal, but they’ve been constantly thwarted or shelved. Whatever form of capitalism we’re living in now, it doesn’t seem like a system in which carbon removal is going to evolve. The derivation of capitalism we’re coping with is predatory, inelegant, and fragmented, seemingly incapable of delivering fixed-capital tools like carbon capture and storage or transformative bioenergy to extend its lifespan.

Critical theorist McKenzie Wark asks: “We think within a metaphysical construct in which capital has some eternal inner essence, and only its forms of appearance ever change…But what if the whole of capitalism had mutated into something else?” Wark speculates on the emergence of what he calls the “vectoralist” class, a new postcapitalist ruling class that owns and controls the means of producing information: the vectors. This is actually worse than capitalism, Wark argues, because the information vector can render everything on the planet a resource.

If a regime begins solar geoengineering, it needs to keep putting those particles up there year after year, until carbon emissions are brought down. Thus, the hard thing isn’t beginning the project, but ending it.

So what does all this mean for geoengineering? If capitalism is focused on vectoral control and ineffective when it comes to ensuring the material conditions of its own existence, solar geoengineering would be done by states or not at all. As for carbon removal, the question is this: If zombified neoliberal capitalism isn’t going to build up CCS and carbon removal in order to save itself from planetary crisis, who’s going to do it?

We, the workers and voters, will have to decide to force the removal of carbon from the atmosphere. And we should — those of us living in the global North, in particular. A whole host of commonly accepted moral principles align with carbon removal: “clean up your own mess,” “the polluter pays,” the “precautionary principle,” and others. Moreover, doing carbon removal in a socially just and environmentally rigorous manner is not just morally desirable — it is actually a precondition for emissions going net negative.

There are basically two levels to carbon removal, as I see it. Level 1 involves niche, boutique, aesthetic, or symbolic removals. This is the biochar at your farmer’s market, the wool beanie grown with regeneratively grazed sheep, the shoes made with recycled carbon, water carbonated by Coca-Cola with carbon captured directly from the air. It is cool. Advocates see it as the first step toward reaching Level 2. You don’t want to knock its fragile emergence, because it’s important for generating momentum and raising awareness of carbon removal. But it’s geophysically impossible that it will “solve” climate change.

Level 2 is the gigaton-scale removals that could actually lower greenhouse gas concentrations. Call it “climate significant.” It’s waste cleanup; pollution disposal.

How does one get from Level 1 to Level 2? Some people think it will naturally happen, just as cleantech — renewable energy — “naturally” becomes cheaper and scales. But unlike cleantech, Level 2 is a cleanup operation; in general, these scales of storage and disposal don’t generate usable products. I asked Noah Deich, executive director of the nonprofit Carbon180, about these middle-range pathways from demonstration to disposal scales, because his organization has done significant work articulating policy proposals for carbon removal. In the near term, Deich sees a threefold approach, or a “stool with three legs.” One is moonshot research and development across the technology and land sectors. The second is supporting entrepreneurs to bring promising ideas to market. Lastly, he notes, “we need to change policy so that there’s sufficient funding for the research and development, but there are also large-scale markets, so that those entrepreneurs and those land managers can access those markets at a meaningful scale.” The near-term actions he identifies include engagement of universities in research and development, starting up an incubator for carbon tech, and policy work such as implementation of tax credits for CCS and the inclusion of carbon farming in the US farm bill.

When I remarked that the middle time frame seemed fuzzy, Deich replied, “The middle part will remain fuzzy, because I think it’s iterative.” You get started with technology in existing markets, which creates jobs and investment opportunities, he says. Success begets policy support, whether it be government or corporate, which begets more markets, and it becomes a reinforcing cycle that snowballs. “If we’re able to create incentives for taking that carbon out of the air, I think it’s reasonable that we’ll be able to ratchet up those incentives and build that broad political coalition that’s both durable and meaningful to do this at large scale.”

Yet I am less and less convinced that there is a clear route from Level 1 to Level 2, nor that the first would naturally progress to the next. Level 1 is what our current set of policies and incentives can accomplish, with a lot of work from think tanks, NGOs, philanthropists, and the like. Level 2 requires a massive transformation: economic, political, cultural. It implies that we decide to treat carbon dioxide as a waste product and dedicate a significant portion of GDP to cleaning it up, at the least. It would require profound state regulation — the same sort that’s needed for strong mitigation, and then some.

There is sometimes a hope among environmentalists and social justice advocates that confronting climate change will itself bring about social transformation — that it will flip us into a new narrative that could take on the climate pollution challenge. As cultural theorist Claire Colebrook writes,

From Naomi Klein’s claim that climate change is the opportunity finally to triumph over capitalism, to the environmental humanities movement that spurns decades of “textualist” theory in order to regain nature and life, to wise geo-engineers who operate from the imperative that if we are to survive we must act immediately and unilaterally, the end of man has generated a thousand tiny industries of new dawns.

However, I think there are plenty of scenarios where we deal with climate change in a middling way that preserves the existing unequal arrangements, leaving us not with a new dawn, but with a long and torturous afternoon. Replacing our current liquid fuels with synthetic, lower-carbon fuels produced with direct air capture and enhanced oil recovery would be one version. But those dawnless scenarios are not necessarily geoengineering scenarios, and vice versa. There are both horrifying and mildly likeable scenarios for how carbon removal might be accomplished. The horrifying ones are easy to conjure to mind, while the likable ones stretch the imagination. It would be easy to tag best-case carbon removal scenarios as utopias — even though they would actually be worlds that have failed to mitigate in time, representing at best a muddling through. That’s where we’re at: even muddling through looks like an amazing social feat, an orchestration so elaborate and requiring so much luck that people may find it a fantastic, utopian dream.

We can maximize our chances of muddling through by engaging proactively with both carbon removal and solar geoengineering. However, binary thinking about climate engineering has made it difficult for progressives to create a dialogue about how engaging with these emerging approaches might be done. Climate engineering has been stuck in the realm of “technology,” rather than understood as a variety of practices that include people in various relationships with nature and each other. To free ourselves of these binaries and imagine a different kind of strategy-led engagement, it’s valuable to articulate a best-case scenario for how these practices could unfold.

*

There’s an abyss in contemporary thinking about the role of industrial technology in coping with climate change.

On one side of this abyss are people who appraise the potential of technology optimistically, but fail to articulate any real historical awareness of how technology has developed in and through contexts that are often exploitative, unequal, and even violent.

On the other side of the abyss are thinkers who, on the contrary, have a deep understanding of colonialism, imperialism, and the historical evolution of capitalism, but dismiss technology as a useful part of responding to climate change.

This cleavage leaves little room for critical discussion of how technologies might be used to further climate justice. It makes it impossible to imagine, for example, democratically controlled industrial technology that doesn’t exist to “conquer” nature. Today, most left thinking has abandoned the “streak of admiration for the productive forces as the instruments of a conquest of nature that will ultimately usher in communist affluence for everyone,” as human ecologist Andreas Malm has observed. But this abandonment did not immediately lead to a coherent articulation of a view of technology that is collective or cooperative, or that works with nature.

I am not the first to observe this. A number of calls have emerged recently for the left to think differently about industrial technology. Geographer Matthew Huber, for one, suggests that “Marx believed that there is something inherently emancipatory about large-scale industrialization, and ecosocialists need not be so quick to dismiss this possibility.” He asks, “What if the phrase ‘development of the productive forces’ was not simply equated with the expansion of dirty industrial production based on coal, oil, and gas and instead represented the full development of industrial energy systems based on cleaner and renewable fuels?” Sociologist Jesse Goldstein, in Planetary Improvement, his critical ethnographic analysis of cleantech, observes that “the sociotechnical capacity is out there to transform the world in any number of ways,” but realizing emancipatory visions will require “killing the investor” in our minds, “thereby liberating our imaginations, our sciences, and our technologies from the narrowing logic of capital.”

These overlapping binaries — geoengineering versus real change — obscure the reality that there is a spectrum of ways of doing, enacting, practicing, deploying, or implementing climate intervention. The implementation does not inhere in the technology. Sticking rigidly to these binaries keeps us from seeing possible futures: it gives the terrain for shaping climate engineering over to the few.

* * *

From After Geoengineering, by Holly Jean Buck, recently published by Verso.

Holly Jean Buck writes on emerging technologies in the Anthropocene, with work appearing in journals like Development and Change, Climatic Change, Annals of the American Association of Geographers and Hypatia. Since 2009, she has been researching the social dimensions of geoengineering, including as a faculty fellow with the Forum for Climate Engineering Assessment in Washington, DC, as a member of the Steering Committee for the international Climate Engineering Conference in Berlin, and as a doctoral researcher at Cornell University, from which she holds a PhD in development sociology.

Longreads Editor: Dana Snitzky

[elliotthezubat]

DEATH CITY DAYS CHAPTER 120

into the nether we go! (again)

Ragnarok: -_______- *gritted teeth* "Thank you, come again...GAH, THESE CUSTOMERS ARE THE WORST!"

kyouko: tough first day?

Ragnarok: "I hate these flipping customers and want to kill them."

kyouko: well, murder's illegal, so best you can do is grin and bear it.

Ragnarok: "..." *CREEPY BIG-TEETH DEMONIC GRIN*

kyouko:.... ._.

-elsewhere-

Danro: *slams open the door to his office...secretaries are seated, doing various tasks and talking until he marches in*

secretary: *looks up*

Secretary 2: "!!!" *stands up, salutes* "SIR!"

secretary: *does the same*

Danro: *salute* "At ease..." *marches by--then stops to look at photos* "...Wait, is this a new one of little Melody? How did she get so big?!!!"

secretary 3: yes, she starts kindergarden this September.

Danro: "How time flies! Congratulations! I'm sure you're worried sick to send her away!"

secretary 3: it is pretty scary, but im sure things will work out, right?

Danro: "..." *nods* "Good...Good attitude...I have work to finish. Take a message if anyone calls--unless family."

secretary: yes sir.

Danro: *marches into his office...sits down at his desk...buries his head in his hands*

{baby!maki: dada! up! up!}

{Danro: "Hee hee! As you wish..." *lifts her up, making an airplane ZOOM noise*}

{baby!maki: *laughs*}

*drip drip*

Danro: *shedding tears onto his desk*

-elsewhere-

Takehisa: "..."

{Takehisa: *drops his suitcase* "Well, here we are."}

{Akitaru: *staring up at the dilapidated cathedral* "...BEAUTIFUL!" *turns to Maki* "Isn't that right, cadet?! Or, um...Oze."}

{maki: just maki is fine, u-unless that's too unprofessional-}

{Takehisa: "You should refer to your commanding officer as 'sir,' or 'Commander Obi,' cadet."}

{maki: s-sorry sir!}

{Akitaru: *slaps Takehisa on the back* "Relax, Hinawa! We're firefighters! What, the military didn't take the stick out your butt when discharging you?"

{Takehisa: "...There is nothing up there, sir."}

{Akitaru: "...Maki, be honest--is he always this relaxed?"}

{maki: not that I can remember?}

{Akitaru: *smiles* "Then we'll need to do something about that!" *drops his bags off his shoulders--all 15 of them* "Starting with giving our new haunt a paint job!"}

Takehisa: "..." *shifts a photo hanging on the wall, showing the three of them in paint-covered overalls in front of the cathedral*

-elsewhere-

miyuri: papa? what's 'IKEA'?

Chuuya: "A furniture store."

miyuri: oooooh! is that where you got mito's castle?

mito: *at the top of the cat tower, lounging in the sunlight*

Chuuya: "Yeah, actually, it is..."

miyuri: WOW!

Chuuya: "They have a lot of furniture, but I did an online order--I didn't want to get lost in the store."

miyuri: ??

Chuuya: "Oh--Ikea's pretty big, almost like a maze trying to get through it all."

miyuri: REALLY?! OwO

Chuuya: "..." *smiles* "Like a castle full of furniture. And even has a restaurant inside."

miyuri: CAN WE GO?! OwO

Chuuya: ^^; "It's kind of a long visit...You'll need some comfortable shoes."

-elsewhere-

Akutagawa: *adjusts his sunglasses, waiting outside the toilet stall* "..." *knocks* "Hurry up in there--I don't have all day to babysit you."

Q: going to the poooottyyyyy~ going to the poooottyyyy~

Akutagawa: "And now they're singing--goddamn it..." *checks his phone*

-elsewhere-

Yosano: *examining ice cream flavors* "Hmm...I think this one--the black cherry."

naomi: ooooh! fancy!

Yosano: "What about you, Maki?"

*seem to be sorbets, yogurts, different toppings*

maki: i'll go for vanilla.

naomi: you ok, maki?

Hyde: "Always a popular choice!" *scoops some up*

maki: THANK YOU!

Yosano: ._____. "...That's quite a reaction to just vanilla. Seriously, what's up?"

maki: whatever do you mean? IM JUST FINE! *forced smile*

Hyde: "...Ma'am, you don't need to stab the ice cream--the spoon is plastic..."

naomi:....listen, if you're on your cycle, you can just tell us, yosano's a doctor and this is totally natural, you don't have to be ashamed.

maki: no, it's not that.

Yosano: -_-; *pats Naomi's shoulder* "Excellent tact...Is something wrong at work?"

Hyde: *has already covered his ears*

maki: well, for starters, my brother is a complete asshat and my dad just doesn't get my choice to join the 8th brigade and- *she rambles for a bit*

Tanizaki: *still standing behind them, holding boxes and shopping bags* "Yep, brothers can suck..." T~T

naomi: *listening to maki ranting and nodding*

Yosano: O_O; "Um...I empathize, and it's great you're not letting your family tell you what to do...But you're an adult--they have no control over you."

maki: exactly! but try telling my old man, he's so stubborn!

hyde: yeah girl, guys are dicks sometimes.

maki: we weren't talking to you?

hyde: solidarity, fam.

Yosano: "..." *sweet smile* "And you're tenacious--not giving up on what you want despite what someone thinks."

maki: thanks, yosano.

-ping-

naomi: ?? oh! naho just sent us a link to the new chapter of her fanfic!

maki: LEMME SEE!

Tanizaki: "OH LORD, NO!"

Hyde: "..." *puts on a helmet, hides behind the counter* ("Not dealing with her writing again...")

naomi:...…*inhales* niccccceeeeee.

Yosano: "..." *glances over their shoulder*

maki: she's really improved since first chapter. im proud of her.

Yosano: "Has she been writing long?"

-elsewhere-

Arthur: *standing in his boxers, arms extended to his sides* "Is this almost over? I feel cold." *he has sensors taped onto him*

Viktor: *checking monitors* "Just confirming my theory--the 8th managed to attract some of the most powerful pyrokinetics, I guess out of dumb luck."

Akitaru: "...Let's just say 'luck,' okay? So, what have you learned?"

Viktor: *holds up an 8th jacket* "You know how Haijima makes fireproof clothes, and yet Shinra keeps burning through his shoes and Tamaki burns through...everything else?"

komori: *holds up a note* <your point being?>

Viktor: "I got curious trying to figure out the maximum temperature, and here's what I found..." *pulls down a curtain, on which he has taped heat-signature outlines of...* "Arthur has almost no resistance to flames on his body despite his pyrokinetic abilities. Shinra does better but only at his feet, meaning he is susceptible to fire on other extremities. But Tamaki, as shown here, has almost total resistance to fire anywhere on her body. You could toss her into an open fire with her suffering no physical damage."

Akitaru: "Gee, isn't that lucky."

tamaki: ._.

shinra:....so in theory, we could burn her at the stake like joan of arc and she'd be fine?

tamaki: SHINRA!

shinra: .-.; sorry, that was uncalled for.

Iris: "Kind of heretical, too."

Petra: -_-#

Viktor: "I do want to keep testing how high the temperatures can get. That's why I had Vulcan make this..." *pulls down a curtain, revealing--* "The Incinerator 4200!"

*The Incinerator has a tiger design to it*

shinra: 0_0;

Viktor: "Who wants to be the first volunteer? Shinra? You can just dip your feet in." *kicks the side, as a foot massager pops out--on fire*

shinra:.... Q~Q;;;;

-elsewhere-

Takigi: *checking the underground maps before looking down the street*

takigi's partner: *looking around*

Takigi: *points* "That stairway--that's the spot where the latest victim was found."

takigi's partner: hmm

Takigi: "The chief seemed really concerned about this--seems like they got the order from higher up to check into the Nether..."

takigi's partner: not to sound intrusive, but your sister was in the nether some time ago, did she tell you anything?

Takigi: *nods* "It's come up in conversations. It sounded like she was embellishing some things, but it's backed up by the 8th's report...even if the 8th isn't exactly more reliable."

takigi's partner: still, they were at the sight of a lot of major events recently.

Takigi: "...Because they keep running recklessly without thinking."

takigi's partner: ...so how is she doing?

Takigi: *DEATH GLARE*

takigi's partner:..... >->;

Takigi: *still frowning, as he looks down the steps* "...That door...You can still see the blood splatter."

*there's police tape around the crime scene*

takigi's partner: criminy, my mom would be rolling in her grave if she knew i was down here.

Takigi: *removes the tape--then grimace* "Ugh--assuming the smell wouldn't wake her up first..." *pulls out his flashlight and gun, before opening the door* "Get ready..."

takigi's partner:.....

Takigi: *studying the paths* "Don't get lost here..."

takigi's partner: *looking around*

*there's something along the floor...*

takigi's partner: hey, take a look at this...

Takigi: "?! Scorch marks, scratches--and fresh, too..."

*CLANG...RATTLE...in the distance*

takigi's partner: ?!?! what was that? *aims his light*

*the maze shows a sign: "Boiler Room ----> "*

takigi's partner: *looks at him*

Takigi: "Why would it still be running here..." *leads the way to the boiler room...* "Cover me..." *kicks down the door*

takigi's partner: DCPD! GET DOWN!.....!?!?!??!

*it's...a lab? there are terraria with animals and plants, a bloody gurney and...a skull in a glass case?*

Takigi: "...Why didn't the police find this..."

takigi's partner: who could this even belong to...some mad scientist?

Takigi: "There are enough of them in this town--hell, just in Haijima...!!! Look! The reports talked about using bugs to induce SHC."

takigi's partner: then, that would mean the white hoods had been here...

*something shift in the shadows, a bit of light reaching Takigi's eyes*

Takigi: "?!" *swings around, aims* "DCPD! FREEZE!" *takes a step forward--*

*CRUNCH*

Takigi: "???" *glances down* "?! The hell?!!"

takigi's partner: SHIT! an infernal?....it's not moving, though.....

Takigi: "An Infernal shouldn't be this well preserved if dead--it should be just ashes...Why is the core still intact..." *still aiming at the shadow* "Step out. Now!"

-beep....beep...beep...beep-

Hood: *steps out--with a bomb strapped to their chest!*

takigi's partner: !!!! WE NEED TO GO, NOW!

*BEEEEEEEEEEP--*

Takigi: "?!!! GET BACK--"

-elsewhere-

*a street level, the ground shakes, as an explosion can be heard*

kyouko: ?!?!? what the hell? !!! *summons her diamond barrier to keep a shoe rack from falling over* *phew* yikes....you alright, sir?

Customer: *holding onto a box of shoes* "Y-Yeah...Was that an earthquake?"

Ragnarok: "...The earth quaked. So, yes. Moron."

*a sewer grid cover had flown up--and landed on a short young adult--*

Mineta: X______X

kyouko: ...well, no one got hurt at least.

Customer: "True...Sorry, I'm in a bit of a rush--I better check with my commander." *sets down the box at the register, dials his phone...*

-back underground-

*there's fire...there's smoke...the lab is demolished...metal pipes broken and litter the floor...steam escaping out of the broken pipes...*

takigi's partner: *coughing* ugh...oze! oze, are you alright??!

*Takigi's partner is bleeding from the forehead, barely able to stand--but he looks relatively unharmed...*

*there's a crater in front of his partner...*

takigi's partner: !!! oze!!

*in the crater is Takigi, in the Yamcha position...he doesn't look too good...*

-elsewhere-

Haumea: *smiling to herself* "Arrow, the blush, please~"

sho: nnnn.... *he's barely conscious*

arrow:....and this benefits us, how?

Haumea: "Ain't it, though~? It's like our own little family. What do you say, Sho?"

sho: .........

Haumea: "That's right..."

-elsewhere-

Akitaru: "... ... ..." *hangs up*

karin: ??

Akitaru: "That was the hospital, looking for Maki."

karin: what happened?

Akitaru: *sighs* "I need to call her--her brother got caught in an explosion."

karin: !!!!

-elsewhere-

Yosano: "Just set them down anywhere."

Tanizaki: *does so--and falls onto the couch*

maki: i think i picked this one out...

naomi: sounds about right..

Yosano: "I'm glad they wrapped this one up--never too early for some birthday shopping."

Tanizaki: "Zzz..."

*the Agency phone rings*

kirako: armed detective agency, kirako haruno speaking, how may i help you?.......oh...one second. maki! it's your commander!

maki: oh? hey commander, what's up?

Akitaru: "Maki...Something's happened."

maki: .........

Akitaru: "Your brother Takigi is in the hospital--"

maki: !!!!!!! *her eyes widen as her hand shakes*

Yosano: "???"

-elsewhere-

Spirit: "Heading to bed, kiddo?"

izumi: yep.

sachiko: make sure you brush your teeth!

izumi: will do!

Spirit: "Night, Izumi."

-elsewhere-

Asher: *slides the window up, climbs down the fire escape quietly...*

-it's fairly quiet, but a family a few windows down seems to be watching a movie on the tv-

Asher: "..." *quiet sigh before getting down to street level...looks back at the apartment*

-a few mice scurry into their hole, carrying food bits in their mouths-

Asher: "..." *closes up their jacket before walking down the street*

-a can is knocked over-

Asher: *looks behind them, arm extended--*

kazue:.........

Asher: "??? Kazue? The hell you doing out?"

kazue: *holds up a sign* <on patrol, you?>

Asher: "...Sneaking out. Wait, 'patrol'? What do you do?"

kazue:....<that's classified for the most part.>

Asher: >_>; "Tch, okay, sure...Need company?"

-elsewhere-

Blair: *in cat form* "Who are we missing?"

mito: <sorry im late everyone!>

banjo: <ayyy mito!> ^w^

Natsume: "Now, remember how we practiced."

-the cats start meow-singing-

sayaka: how do these cats have such talent?!

Kuro: *joining in the harmony*

Bakugo: *covering his head with a pillow, groaning*

-morning-

Asher: *sniffles, yawns, looks around*

-sunlight peeks through the broken windows and cracks in the ceiling in a warehouse-

Asher: "...?" *sits up* "Kazue? ...Please tell me you're not hanging up like a vampire bat or something."

kazue: *sleeping against a pole in the corner*

Asher: "..." *checks their phone*

-elsewhere-

mina: hmm, oh! the new chapter of 'Manami Love Panic' just posted!

Jiro: "??? For real?"

mina: yep! ^^ looks like they're starting a summer vacation arc now!

Jiro: "Timely." *leans on Mina's shoulder, reading over it*

-elsewhere-

Takigi: *sitting up on a bench in the hospital hallway*

sachiko: mr oze! what are you doing out of your room?!

Takigi: "I got bored. I was thinking of visiting some other patients, taking a walk, maybe taking in a round of ping-pong--"

sachiko: need i remind you what you are in here for? burnt face, burnt forearm, left arm fractured, bruises all over, some injuries will take three months to heal!

Takigi: "Tch. I'm fine--Oze's heal quickly. How about you take a walk and cool off before you get an aneurysm."

sachiko: now liste-

Dr. John: *pat pat* "How about we leave Detective Oze alone for a bit, Sachiko?" ^^;

sachiko:...hmph. alright. but i better see you back in your room, mister! *gives him the 'im watching you' sign*

Takigi: "All in good time..." *waves her off*

???: causing trouble again, honey?

Takigi: O\\\\\O *turns around* "Sw-Sweetie muffin?!"

takigi's GF: ^^ *hands him a bento*

Takigi: "Oh, wow--this looks incredible! Thank you! D-Did you get my voicemail? I didn't hear from you..."

-elsewhere-

maki:......

Takehisa: "...Have you eaten?"

maki:...yeah..

Takehisa: "...The doctors promised to call it there were any changes. And you are on leave if you want..."

maki:.....ok....

Takehisa: "...I'm sorry."

-elsewhere-

Sid: "Kazue, Asher--you're late."

Asher: -_-;

kazue: ....

Sid: *groans* "Have a seat--get notes from your classmates after...Now, we return to the discussion about limb-weapon displacement--"

Asher: *sits with Izumi*

izumi: you ok?

Asher: "..." *nods* "My sister didn't call did she?"

izumi: she did actually.

Asher: >_<; "I'm in deep shit, huh?"

-elsewhere-

Hajiki: *hanging from the flagpole* "WHY AM I UP HERE?!"

hito: i was about to ask the same thing.

Hajiki: "I CAN'T REMEMBER, AND I AM SCARED I WILL LOSE MY GRIP AND FALL! IS THERE A...THAT THING WITH THE...WOOD STEPS?"

hito: you mean a ladder?

Hajiki: "YES, A LADDER, PLEASE!"

-elsewhere-

Kouyou: *looking at the menu* "Hmm..."

miyuri: wooooooow! *shiny eyes at what all is on the menu*

*the kids' menu lists 'dinosaur chicken nuggets'*

miyuri: are there dino-chickens?!

Kouyou: ^^; "I think they just cut the chicken into dinosaur shapes..."

miyuri: oooh.

Kouyou: "Sonia, you hungry?"

sonia:... i think i'll just get a cheeseburger and some fries.

Kouyou: *nods* "I'm intrigued by the tsukemono--"

???: "WOOF!"

sonia: ??

Otis: *pants, looking through the gate between the restaurant patio and the sidewalk*

miyuri: puppy!

Kouyou: "!!! Careful, Miyuri--"

Otis: *fits his nose through the gate posts*

miyuri: hi puppy! ^w^

Otis: *pants, licks her hand*

miyuri: *giggles* ^w^

Kouyou: -_-;

sonia: h-hello sir...

Keller: *holds onto Otis's leash* "Howdy. Old Otis isn't giving you any trouble, is he?"

Otis: *nuzzle*

sonia:....he sees to be doing well...

Keller: *nods* "Good."

Kouyou: *clears her throat*

Keller: "..." *tugs on Otis's leash*

miyuri: bye bye, puppy. *waves*

Otis: "WOOF!" *walks off with Keller*

-elsewhere-

Daisy: *sets down a bagged lunch with 'Daisy' written on it in marker* -_-# "Any of you say a word, and you get a spork to the eye..." *takes out a bagged sandwich--and a note drops out with it* "..." *groans*

louisa: ??

Daisy: *groans* "Damn it, Mom...Your parental units ever do embarrassing stuff..."

louisa: well, it's been a while since i spoke to them, so....

Daisy: "...Sorry." *offers half a cookie*

-elsewhere-

Axel: *running track against classmates*

zeke: yeah! woohoo!

Yafeu: *almost running into Stephanie's lane* "WATCH IT!"

stephanie: sorry~

Monica: *sitting on the stands with Genny* "The hell you ain't running?"

genny: PE is not my strong suit.....

Derek: "Hardly an excuse--you'll just fall behind at that rate." *has a timing chart*

lei-lei: *waves to genny*

Monica: "YOLANDA--MOVE YOUR ASS!"

-elsewhere-

Medusa: *passes her hand over a vial to spread out its vapor*

stheno:.....so what's the plan exactly?

Medusa: "Numbers."

stheno: ??

Medusa: "To win this war, we must win hearts and minds--increase our forces, our numbers."

stheno: as in recruiting people?

Medusa: "In so many words, yes. I'm trying to locate the nearest one..."

-elsewhere-

Takigi: *on the phone* "No, you tell Sansa to take this up with the chief--we need to find what was down there!"

nurse: mr oze, you have a visitor.

Takigi: "I'm at work--tell them to wait."

nurse: it's your father.

Takigi: O______O "...I'll call you back." *hangs up, stands up--and grimaces in pain* "AH!"

Nurse 2: "... ... ..." *whispers* "They're like little forests--above his eyes!"

nurse: shh!

Danro: "TAKIGI! YOU LOOK AFRIGHT!"

Takigi: "I-I'm fine, sir!" *salute--with the wrong arm* "...Ow."

Danro: "We were so worried about you! This is too dangerous!"

madoka oze: we're just...happy you're alright...

Takigi: Q_Q; "Mom? I-I'm sorry--I didn't mean to worry you." *awkward one-arm hug* "Where's Maki?"

madoka oze: she's....at work still.

Takigi: "..." *nods* "Okay...Alright."

Danro: "...Sit down. Your mother didn't go to all this work to make you a decent meal for you to waste it."

madoka oze: yeah, i know how crappy hospital food can be.

Nurse 3: "Grr...Can you believe the nerve of this family?!"

Nurse 2: "...Do raccoons live in those things?"

nurse: -_-# carol i swear to god.

-elsewhere-

-knock on the gallows mansion doors-

liz: yes?

tsubaki: hi, mind if we use your shower? ours has been monopolized. ^^;

Black Star: -n- "We adopted too many brats."

liz: um actually it's a bit....occupied at the moment.

Black Star: "??? You have a flipping mansion--not one bathroom is available?"

liz: well-

Black Star: "Screw this! I feel sweaty and gross, and I need to be cleaned!" *marches to the bathroom, pulling his shirt off on the way*

liz: ah-

Black Star: *kicks down the door*

stocking: HEY!

Kid: "BLACK STAR! YOU PIECE OF--"

Black Star: "JEEZ! COVER UP!"

stocking: *TOSSES A BOTTLE OF SHAMPOO AT HIM*

Black Star: *dodges* "OKAY, I GET IT, I'M GOING!" *running*

Kid: "I'LL KILL YOU FOR THIS!"

stocking: *siiigh* well that was embarrassing.

Kid: T\\\\T

Black Star: *muttering* "They got bigger since the last time I walked in..."

stocking: I HEARD THAT! D8<

Kid: *stifles a laugh*

stocking: h-hey! >3<

Kid: "Is that wrong?" *cups her* "Seems to be."

stocking: *snerk* *cheek pull* meeeean~! Xp

Kid: "Hee hee..." *smooch*

stocking: *laughs* ^///^

Black Star: *walks back* "So. ...Liz, you got a shower in your bedroom, right? Or is Wes going to be in there?"

liz: there's a shower this way. -_-;

Black Star: "Thank you~" *pulling off his shoes and socks along the way*

liz: *closes the bathroom door*

stocking: thanks liz!

liz: no prob!

stocking: right....now, where were we~?

Kid: "Hmm...Not sure I remember. Care to jog my memory?"

stocking: *kiss* mmm~<3

-elsewhere-

Monica: "...You weren't entirely awful in track and field, Albarn."

izumi: oh, um. thank you.

Monica: >_>; "Better than some people--STEPH, YOU ALMOST GOT TRAMPLED BY THOSE MORONS!" *slams her locker door shut--which knocks down a row of them*

-elsewhere-

Sid: *sighs*

nygus: long day?

Sid: "You could say that..." *opens the fridge, pulling out a cup of yogurt* "The race in PE was a disaster."

nygus: *listening*

Sid: "Some of those first-years are so gung-ho on proving themselves that they rush in--just like the desert training. I even had two of them collide face-to-face in the track run, knocking heads."

nygus: yeah, they were in here.

Sid: "How bad was the diagnosis?"

nygus: one student got a concussion.

Sid: "?! Did you call up Kim?"

nygus: *nods*

-elsewhere-

oriko: *practicing violin*

Justin: "..." *has removed his headphones*

oriko: *still practicing*

Justin: *closes his eyes* ("It sounds...")

-seems she made an error-

oriko: oops. that's not right, let me try again... ^^;

Justin: "?"

oriko: it's been a while since i played last. ^^;

Justin: ^^ *nods* "It sounded good, all things considered."

oriko: thanks. *smiles*

Justin: "Well, I'll continue housework...Thank you for playing."

-elsewhere-

tsugumi: hmmm.. hey anya, meme? if you were weapons, what kind of weapon would you want to be?

Meme: "Axe chainsaw gun tonfa."

Anya: "..." *facepalm*

tsugumi: that's....a lot. *sweatdrop*

Meme: "Well, this is a thought experiment, and it never hurts to be prepared." ^^ "How about you, Anya?"

Anya: "Hmmm...Something classic, such as a spear."

tsugumi: hmmm. makes sense. and maybe the tip of the spear is shaped like a bird's wing!

mio: but arent _you_ the bird?

tsugumi: ^^;

Anya: "Hmmm...That could inflict more damage."

Meme: "Bird's the word."

Anya: "...What?"

tsugumi: ^^;

Meme: "I'll explain it later. How about you, Mio?"

mio:..... -_- i _am_ a weapon.

Meme: "Then what kind of meister would you want to be?"

mio: *sweatdrop*

-elsewhere-

ochako: *getting her work uniform on* ok, im ready for another shift!

Hyde: "Let's make that bread!"

ochako: YEAH!

Hyde: *opens up the baked good drawer, slides in the donuts* "There--bread!"

*the door jingles as someone enters*

ochako: welcome!

Vampa: "Bonjour!" *looking at bags of chips*

peppino: ^w^ ooooh these look so yummy!

Hyde: "We got a BOGO on those."

peppino: *GASP* oh my gosh look at these petit fours! they're so adorable! >w<

Vampa: "I think we could swing that." *to Ochaco* "Shopkeep, some of those, please."

ochako: right away sir!

Hyde: *watching them* "..."

Vampa: *picks up a pack of gum, studying it*

-elsewhere-

Motojiro: *puts the pen down, studying the seating chart* "Okay, I think we're all set."

leo: *smiles*

Motojiro: "I feel like I'm missing something, though...You okay with the music?"

leo: well, i wrote a list of songs for the wedding and reception. what do you think?

Motojiro: *reads through them--and--* "GASP!"

leo: ?? is something wrong?

Motojiro: *patting her arm, pointing* "This one is sooooooo good!"

leo: ah. im glad.

Motojiro: *hands on both of her cheeks* "I love you so much." *smooch*

leo: mmm~<3

-elsewhere-

Kafka: *reading the newspaper, having a cup of tea* "Hmm. Feel Good Inc's stocks went up--"

Walter: *rips the paper out of his hands* "GREAT RAO, THEY HAVE A FILM MARATHON THIS WEEKEND!"

Kafka: *staring at his empty hands* "..." -_-#

etta: really?

hans: which films?

Walter: "Superhero stuff! They even have 'Invaders from Uranus'--the worst thing ever! All Might has a brief cameo in it!"

george: wait seriously?

wilhelm: *GIGGLING*

Kafka: "Be mature--"

Walter: "There's also a costume contest."

-elsewhere-

All Might: *in depowered form in the teacher's lounge, staring at his phone* "... ... ..." -_-# "I thought I burned all those film reels."

Izuku: ^^; "Actually, someone kickstarted an online fundraiser to restore the film."

-elsewhere-

Giriko: "Okay, be a good girl for your big sis, okay?"

anna: okie!

TOWKOW: we're gonna teach this kid how to ROCK! YEAH! XD

Giriko: "...Have fun with that--but she has developing ears, and if you make her deaf, I'll--"

malaria: i'll make sure she's ok, dad. ^^;

Giriko: "I know you will..." *head-pat*

-elsewhere-

Cervantes: *looking out the window* "...Le sigh."

marquis: is something the matter?

Cervantes: "Nothing...It's just, when it's springtime--"

Dumas: "SUMMER."

Cervantes: "--the heart yearns for what it lacks."

marquis: awww.

Dumas: -_-; "I can't believe you're thinking of that cop again...Your sparkles are getting everywhere."

Cervantes: *has a glitter pen that he's writing onto notebook paper* -3-

marquis: why dont you write her a letter?

Cervantes: OwO "EXCELLENT IDEA! Let me write the envelope and I can send one of the love poems I already wrote--" *addresses the envelope 'Dulcinea Toboso, c/o Interpol--'* "Hmm...Need the street address..."

-elsewhere-

*in a dark room, someone is tied to a gurney...bugs are seen in vials around them, as white-clad figures stare at them*

Victim: "Please--let me go! I need to go home!"

???: shhhhh....

Victim: *crying, losing their mind* "LET ME GO! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! STOP!"

-elsewhere-

Akitaru: *on the phone* "..." *nods* "I understand...I'll need some time to re-organize."

tamaki: *her head is stuck in a cereal box....somehow* what's up?

Akitaru: "...Yes, thank you. I'll call back after I break the news. Goodbye." *hangs up* "...Orders from above..." *takes out a pair of children's safety scissors* "Stand still--I'll get you out of that..."

-elsewhere-

Honda: "LINE UP!"

hito: *salute*

Takeru: *salute* -~-;

Hajiki: *salutes--with the wrong hand*

Honda: "WE HAVE A NEW ASSIGNMENT!" *taps a pointer to the map of Death City, underground*

jonas: sir, this is-

Honda: "THE NETHER."

anton: *GULP*

Takeru: *silent screaming*

Hajiki: "Really? I thought the Nether was just some little itty part of a subway..."

-elsewhere-

Izuku: *holding his suitcase down* "Come on--fit, darn it."

inko: izuku? is everything alright in there?

Izuku: *grunts* "Y-Yeah! Just struggling to fit all of this into my suitcase--" *presses down and--*

*FWOMP*

*a pair of boxers flies out of his room and against the wall*

inko:.....do you need help?

Izuku: QwQ *flung back into a pile of clothes* "Yes, ma'am, please?"

-elsewhere-

Masaru: "Now let's all calm down and talk this out--"

mitsuki: why are you being such a stubborn little brat?! we're only trying to help!

Bakugo: "I can do this on my own! God, can't you give me some room to prove that?!"

mitsuki: you're just flinging everything in there all willy-nilly! it looks like you threw a tornado in there!

Bakugo: "I can find what I need--I HAVE A SYSTEM FOR THIS!"

-elsewhere-

Mr. Uraraka: ^^; "I don't think a suitcase is the place for a doggie..." *pat pat*

trixie: *tail wagging* *ARF!*

Mr. Uraraka: *squeezes a toy, which squeaks* *tosses it*

trixie: *NYOOM*

-elsewhere-

ganma: now, the trick i always use when packing is to put the flatter things at the bottom, like clothes.

Samidare: *digging through Tsu's boxes of snacks--*

satsuki: moooom! sami's trying to mooch off sis!

Samidare: >_< "Tat-pole-tail!"

Beru: "Samidare, put them down."

Samidare: -n- *puts them down*

-elsewhere-

Kyotoku: *reviewing the feeding schedule* "Hang on--that's all the bird feed needed?"

mika jirou: im surprised too.

bowie: *BWAWK* EAT SHIT! *BWAWK*

Kyotoku: "..." *groans* "Goddamn it."

-elsewhere-

ragdoll: *shaking a cat toy* come on snoopy, go get it!

snoopy: *mreow!*

Mandalay: *recording it on her phone* "So cute! I just can't!" >w<

pixie bob: dawww!

Tora: *flexing* "Kota, could you get me some water? And some for Snoopy's dish?"

kouta:...*grunts and walks off*

Mandalay: "..." *sighs*

-elsewhere-

Sansa: "And with Oze out, I've had to pick up on investigating that patchwork person."

minoura: which one?

Sansa: *holds up a photo--the man looks to have his face stapled, skin of different colors* "This one. Why, who's the other one?"

minoura: oh yeah, that one. thought you meant those weirdos at that clinic...

Sansa: "... I never want to mess with that 'doctor' ever again..." *shudders*

-elsewhere-

atsushi: do you know where we're going? [[kyouka trying to find where her parents are buried?]]

Kyoka: "...Honestly, this is a more challenging than I thought..." *looking around* "A lot has changed."

*they've already passed one house in the distance*

Kyoka: *staring at the house*

sylvia: *pant pant* w-wait up!

Kyoka: "Oh, sorry."

atsushi: *looks around*

*there's a field...with something sticking out of it*

atsushi: ??

Kyoka: "...There." *walks to it, struggling over the rockier terrain*

atsushi:....should we come with or....?

Kyoka: "Stay here." *walks up alone*

atsushi:......

{Kyoka, a child: *can't stop screaming*}

{mr izumi: kyouka? are you alright?}

{Kyoka: *crying--her knee looks bruised from tripping*}

{mr izumi: *helps her up* let's see here. *examining the injury*}

{*it looks like a small abrasion*}

{Kyoka: *sniffles, crying less loudly*}

{mr izumi: i think we can fix this no problem. let's get inside so we can clean the cut.}

Kyoka: *her hand on the marker, tears falling* "..." *she looks stone-faced*

demon snow:.......

Kyoka: *shakes* "Why..."

atsushi:.....??

-there seem to be two other figures standing by the grave-

demon snow:.....*puts her hand on kyouka's shoulder*

Kyoka: *can't speak, her throat tightening...falls to her knees*

demon snow:...*hug*

Kyoka: "..." *holds onto Demon Snow*

mrs izumi?: .... *small smile* i see she's in good hands...and good company.

Mr. Izumi?: *nods* "Look how much she's grown."

mrs izumi?: hard to believe it's been almost 4 years...

Mr. Izumi?: "...We missed so much..."

atsushi:....

mrs izumi?:...?? young man, you can see us, cant you?

atsushi: !!.....*small nod*

Mr. Izumi?: "You're Nakajima, yes?"

atsushi: *nod* (can you hear my thoughts?)

Mr. Izumi?: ("We can? ...!!! Oh, wow, this makes things easier!")

atsushi: (im still reasonably new to this 'seeing and hearing ghosts' thing.)

odasaku: *nod*

Mr. Izumi?: ("I see...You've been keeping an eye on our daughter.")

atsushi: (yeah, more like she's keeping an eye on me.) ^^;

mrs izumi?: *chuckle*

Mr. Izumi: ("Well, it's important to have someone to watch your back in this line of work.")

atsushi: (yeah...)

-elsewhere-

Akutagawa: *looking from the Port Mafia Tower, down to a certain spot* "..."

miura: mr akutagawa?

Akutagawa: *coughs* "Y-Yes...?"

miura: what are you looking at?

Akutagawa: "..." *points to a spot* "Can you see down to Cage Street in the Slums?"

miura: you mean cone street?

Akutagawa: *shakes his head* "No, parallel to it--another street."

miura: oh.

Akutagawa: "...Used to steal from a shop there..."

miura:.....

-elsewhere-

Tanizaki: ._.; "He's been at it for hours--non-stop...I think he's going to stroke out."

Kunikida: *typing furiously*

aya: should i intervene?

Lucy: "Please do--the boss isn't ready for the game yet."

aya:....HI-CHA!

Kunikida: *stops typing with one hand to block, not even looking away from the screen* "I am busy, Aya."

aya: you cant skip out on rest! you're gonna get an ulcer!

Kunikida: "I already had my yearly check-up, and--"

yosano: your records disagree. ^^

Kunikida: -_-# "I appreciate your concern, Doctor, but I am managing my condition--"

Dazai: *kicks the side of the desk--as a drawer pops open into Kunikida's shin*

Kunikida: >_<# "OW! DAZ--"

*the drawer is full of energy drinks*

yosano:.......*grabs kunikida by the ponytail* you're coming with me.

Kunikida: Q__Q "OW! LET GO!"

-elsewhere-

Gin: "??? Q? What's wrong?"

Q: *squirming* >~<

Gin: "Did something happen? Or are you feeling sick?"

Q: i need to go!

Gin: *sighs* *knocks on the bathroom door* "Kuniko? Are you done in there?"

-elsewhere-

Kenji: *watering the tomatoes on the rooftop garden--then spots down on the street--* "Nankichii!"

nankichii: !! h-hi kenji!

Kenji: "Hang on--I'll be right down!" *leaps off the roof*

nankichii: a-are you alright?! D8>

Kenji: *had already swung on the drain pipes and lands on the sidewalk--producing two giant footprints shattered in the cement* "Yep!" ^w^ "I didn't get a chance to eat today..."

nankichii: .~.

Kenji: "What're you up to?"

-elsewhere-

Crimson Lotus Assassin: *taps the side of their head, causing their eyes to flicker* "..." <Two targets ahead.> *points at a building with no windows*

???: <good. move in.>

CL Assassin: *proceeds, sticking close to the floor, as if slithering*

*whispers can be heard inside the building*

???: *inside the building* "No, that goes underground..."

???: ugh, how are you supposed to navigate this place?

 ???: "The goggles and GPS device. Did you even listen to the orientation?"

*the lights go off inside*

???: oh what the fuck?

*SLICE*

???: ?!?!??!

*it sounds like something wet sprayed along the wall--before shining eyes pop up in the dark*

CL Assassin: *hiss*

???: ?!?!?! *pulls out a gun*

*the eyes dart away before vanishing*

???: shit shit shit!

*there's a noise on the wall behind them--before it breaks down, the moonlight shining in*

??? ?!?!?! where are you!?

*something drips on their shoulder*

???: *looks up*

*something rattles above them, as the CL Assassin descends with a hiss*

???: *SCREAMS*

*through the hole in the wall, others with shining eyes look in at the carnage*

-elsewhere-

Eugene: "She's still on the phone...Must be important."

frances: yes....understood....hm??.....!!! oh stop! >///<

London: *pats Eugene's shoulder* "Let her be, buddy. Come on, you still need to practice your ability."

Eugene: .____. "Do I? Really? We're still thawing out Ambrose..."

Ambrose: *encased in ice, looking pissed*

barrie: <-<;

Eugene: T~T "I'm trying my best! I just want to go home--my wife is worried sick..."

-morning-

Arthur: *petting the donkey's head on the wall* "Good, Silver Burro..."

shinra: *YAAAAAWN*

Arthur: "Thank you for continuing to serve as our sentry, Silburro..."

shinra: you know it cant answer you, right?

Arthur: "What does that matter? With or without life, its spirit serves as a shield against threats from the outside. Plus, we're in Death City--this is hardly the weirdest thing I could be doing."

shinra: .....i GUESS!

Arthur: "What irks me is how the Lieutenant's experiments have ruined Silburro's look..." *gestures to the horned hat on Silburro's head*

shinra: ....animal crossing?

Arthur: "??? But Silburro can't move?"

*a wad of paper falls out of Silburro's mouth*

Arthur: "... ... ..." *horrified silent screaming*

shinra: ???

Arthur: *pulls out a samurai sword* "Demon--how dare you defile Silburro with your paper refuse!"

shinra: hey! i didnt do it!

Arthur: *tackles Shinra*

maki: what's going on-..... owo

Arthur: *choke hold*

Iris: -_-; "Maki...Why is there paper in the donkey's mouth?"

maki: erm-

tamaki: littering is bad you know!

Iris: "So is improper disposal of waste--"

shinra: MERCY! DX>

Arthur: *knocked down, with Shinra on top of him*

tamaki: *examines the paper*

Iris: "How do you accumulate so much wasted paper, anyway?"

tamaki: o///////////////////////////o um....maki....

maki: they're.....old drafts.

Iris: "... ... ..." -_____-;

Relan: *walks in* "...Yikes. We're already starting this early?"

tamaki: *yanks shinra off* ok, that's enough rough-housing you two.

shinra: he started it!

Vulcan: "The 8th, a caravan of dummies..."

Arthur: "Don't put trash in Silburro's mouth!"

lisa: oh, that reminds me, maki.

maki: ??

lisa: the commander was looking for you.

-in Akitaru's office-

Akitaru: "..."

Takehisa: "..."

maki: *salutes* commander.

Akitaru: *salutes* "You may want to sit down for this..."

maki: what is it?

Takehisa: *hands her a report--it has a military seal on it*

maki: *her stomach drops as she opens it*..........!!!!!!????

Akitaru: "With the 2nd leading a mission into the Nether, it was thought best that you--"

maki: go back to the military?! but im a firefighter now!

Akitaru: "But given what happened to your brother, General Oze thought--"

maki: my dad? tch- of course he would issue this. well, since this is a family matter, i can easily decline to it!

Akitaru: "Your father is just worried--and I have to agree. This mission will be more dangerous than last time. The Hoods are liked caged rats, ready to attack, and unless we want to upset the 2nd and the military, we have to be smart how we handle this."

maki: you're seriously agreeing to this?! captain, talk some sense into him!

Takehisa: "...Officer Oze. I order you to return to the military."

maki: ......y-you cant be serious!

Takehisa: "There are reasons for this decision--"

maki: and what reason is that?!

Takehisa: "..."

Akitaru: "...Tell her."

Takehisa: *clear his throat--*

-outside-

Iris: >_> "So...What are they saying?"

shinra: i cant hear, this door is too thick.

tamaki: just like your head.

Arthur: "Ha." *has a glass to the door* "Hang on...Okay, the Commander just say 'Bonk.' Or maybe 'Donk.'"

tamaki: -_-;

nozomi: you're...holding it the wrong way.

Arthur: *has the glass stuck over his ear* "What? I can't hear--"

*the door slams open*

maki: ...... *she seems upset*

tamaki: ._.;

Vulcan: "??? So what--"

maki: *glare*

shinra: OxO;;;;;

Arthur: "Oh dear--they have awaken the ogre--"

maki: *storms to her room and slams the door shut*

shinra:.....

-elsewhere-

Takeru: *quiet whine of worry...*

hito: *cleaning guns* the nether, huh?

Takeru: "That is too, too dangerous! I read the reports and heard from the 8th--Kusakabe was stabbed nearly to death in there!" >~<

hito: hmmm.

Takeru: "I don't know what to do--I never wanted to be in the military! I was just recruited because my power is too much for traditional means to contain--" *starts heating up*

hito: easy, easy now.

Takeru: *grabs a paper bag, starts breathing into it*

hito: ..... (is this really the best place for him? dad, you always told me that being a soldier means being brave and doing the right thing, no matter how dangerous.)

Honda: *serious face as he walks by* "Morning, soldiers!"

hito: *salutes* sir!

Takeru: "EEP!" *flings the bag up--on fire*

-elsewhere-

Meme: "??? Who's she on the phone with?"

tsugumi: oh, well....i-i'll ask miss misery if she can set something up for you....h-hey, it's ok! it's only temporary, right? you'll be back in no time!

Anya: "Some guest, it sounds like..."

tsugumi: ok...see you soon. *hangs up* *phew*

Meme: "You okay?"

-tsugumi explains the situation-

Anya: "Oh dear--that's all awful."

Meme: "We'll do whatever we can to convince Miss Misery!"

tsugumi: thanks guys.

mio: any time.

ao: *nod*

Meme: "What about Takigi? You think you'll call him to see if he's okay?"

ao: im sure anya is curious as well.

Anya: O\\\\\O "?!"

-elsewhere-

mami: ok, the barrier should be here. you ready?

yuma: *nods*

nagisa: yep!

Sayaka: "Ready and waiting!"

Kyouko: "..."

homura: madoka and i will serve as backup.

mami: alright, let's go.

Sayaka: *follows Mami*

Kyouko: *looks around*

-inside the barrier it resembles a pencil sketching of a foggy forest path, like something from a tim burton drawing. crows with blood red eyes watch the girls as they pass-

Sayaka: "Spooky..."

yuma: *gulp*

homura:...familiars most likely. but they dont seem to be attacking yet....

Kyouko: "They waiting for an opening?"

mami:....*holds an arm out, pointing to a figure*

figure: *they appear to be a woman in funeral garb. it looks at them, and then screeches*

Sayaka: "?!!"

Death the Kid: Kyouko: *battle position*

-the birds begin divebombing at them-

madoka: *shooting them with arrows*

Sayaka: *slices through them*

-elsewhere-

Yukio: *checks his blood* "..."

{Todo: "..."}

-knock-

Yukio: *buttons up* "Come in."

momo sakura: yuki? are you feeling ok?

Yukio: "Fine, thanks." *puts on a smile*

-elsewhere-

Bakugo: "Then she had the nerve to dump the entire luggage to do again! GAH! I hate her crap!"

itsuka: well, i guess she's just being a mom.

Bakugo: "Since when is being a mom synonymous to being annoying as fuck? Your mom isn't this bad, is she?"

-elsewhere-

NOS: *flips through student profiles again*

Twice: "Okay, let's try a Dabi clone!"

himiko: traaaansform!

Dabi Clone: *looks deformed, like off model art* 0_0 "...BLOO."

himiko:..... owo

Twice: "It's beautiful! ANIMATION ERROR!"

NOS: "Hmm, looks about the same."

Dabi: -_-#

mustard: at least it saves on the budget.

himiko: what?

mustard: what?

Dabi: *lights the clone on fire*

Dabi Clone: *screams, flails*

Twice: "DABI JR, NO!"

fang: gaga?

Dabi: "That thing wasn't your dad..."

fang: *laughs* ^o^

Twice: "Aw, that's the nicest you've been to your child."

Dabi: *frowns*

fang: ^w^

NOS: "Progress, I assume--" *still staring at Denki's profile*

himiko: *peeeeep* owo

NOS: "Soon, you will be mine..." *looks behind him* "?!"

himiko: OwO do you like him?

NOS: "..." *pushes her away* "Get your mind out of the gutter. I just want to suck out his electric essence."

mustard: phrasing!

Twice: "I just heard 'suck essence.' Do you need one of those European converter plugs? A butt plug, maybe?"

magne: *GASP* not in front of the BABY!

Twice: "Whoopsie--sorry! THE BABY WAS GOING TO LEARN AT SOME POINT!"

tomura:.......

NOS: "Now look what you've done--you've awakened the night owl..."

-elsewhere-

Kid: "Feel better?"

stocking: yeah. stupid pencil, talking smack about me...

Kid: ^^; "They are notoriously rude..." *tucks her in*

stocking: ground that fucker down to the nub. *YAWN* show you to...shittalk me with a bishonen voice...fucking pencil. zzzzzz...

Kid: *forehead smooch, smooths her hair*

-elsewhere-

kotone: how does this one look?

kirika: eh, not what i'd pick, but hey, your save file.

kotone: well...i think it's nice.

Gopher: "Wings, wings..."

kotone: is that an option?

Gopher: "If I could mod it..." T~T

kirika: hmm.

Gopher: "I don't know who to pick...Dragon-something?"

-elsewhere-

Fukuzawa: "Good morning." *steps out of his office, walks to the tea kettle*

kirako: good morning, sir. here's a list of requests.

Fukuzawa: "Thank you." *reviews* "Are all members present?" *looks around*

kirako: *nods*

Kunikida: "Sir, good morning. I have already set up most missions for--"

Fukuzawa: *points to one* "Send Montgomery to this one." *taps the sheet*

Kunikida: "...Sir, I think that one may be out of her skill set..."

Fukuzawa: *staaaaaaaaaaaaare*

aya: anything i can do, sir?

 Fukuzawa: "Yes, accompany her."

Kunikida: D8

aya: heck yeah! am i gonna get to fight bad guys?

Kunikida: "..." *ahem* *hands the map and instructions* "Find Lucy and head out."

-elsewhere-

Crimson Lotus Assassin: *bows* <I completed the assassination.>

???: good. now for our next target. *hands them a picture of 'the park's' leader*

Assassin: *hiss* "Excellent...I will begin."

-elsewhere-

Sakuya: "??? What's wrong?"

tsubaki:....i dont know...just.... *sigh*

Sakuya: "..." *pat pat* "You need a break."

tsubaki: yeah...maybe...

Shamrock: "What if you took a vacation?"

tsubaki: maybe..

Belkia: *holds up brochures* "Swiss Alps, scenic Chernobyl, Centaur Tours, Sao Paul..."

-elsewhere-

Lucy: *checks the map on her phone* "Okay, the warehouse is a few blocks away..." *smiles at Aya* "Kind of exciting, huh?"

aya: you bet!

*it seems to be an industrial area...there are some laborers working out front*

Security Guard: "Hold up--no kiddos allowed in here..."

aya: *holds up a paper*

Security Guard: *reads* "??? You're the ones Boss sent?"

Boss: *groans* "I told the Agency to send professionals, not some little girls."

Lucy: "??? Little girls?" *looks around* "Aya, do you see any little girls here?"

aya: hey! we arent just 'some little girls' we're certified butt-whoopers!

Boss: -_-; "I was hoping for the tiger or even that samurai..."

Lucy: "...Hey, is that your car?" *points a few blocks away* "You let your employees eat in that thing?"

Boss: "What? It has air conditioning--"

Lucy: *snaps her fingers--and the car disappears*

Boss: D8

-and so-

Lucy: "Pfew! I got the last of the shipment into Anne's Room."

aya: it's really spacious in there!

Lucy: *nods* "Since joining the Agency, the President gave me a power boost. I bet I could fit an entire building in there now." ^w^

aya: wow! that's so cool!

*they pass an alley...*

Lucy: "We got some time before we're do to the drop-off point--feeling hungry?"

aya: heck ye-.... *turns*

*glowing eyes stare right at Aya*

aya: show yourself!

*a big straw pokes out of the shadows*

aya: !?!

Lucy: "?!" *shields Aya* "We're out of here--"

*SHTIK*

aya: LUCY!

Lucy: "... ... ..." @w@ *collapses, unconscious, a giant dart sticking out of her neck*

*masked assassins in red step out*

aya: !!!! s-stay back! im warning you!

Crimson Lotus Assassin 1: <Retrieve the teleporter. Silence the tiny one.>

Crimson Lotus Assassin 2: *reaches for Aya*

aya: *KICK*

CLA 2: "Ow! You little brat!" *grabs at her*

Lucy: *yawns* "Atsushi, the balloons go in the closet..."

*FWOOP*

*a tear in space opens up above Lucy*

aya: ??!!

*a balloon-design closet appears in the tear--and drops like an anvil on top of CLA 2's head*

CLA 2: X____X "..." *collapses on top of Aya*

aya:...woah.

Lucy: "Zzz...Giant panda, no, use the fork and spoon..."

*more portals out of Anne's Room open--dumping contents on top of CLAs*

CLA 1: "..." <I am not here for this buffoonery...> *throws Lucy over their shoulder, covering her mouth*

aya: HEY!!

CLA 1: *leaps with Lucy up the wall--a tail poking out of their outfit, within Aya's reach*

aya: *YOINK!*

CLA 1: "?!!!" <Unhand me!> *slithering up the wall, dragging Aya with them*

aya: let her go!

CLA 1: <Begone...> *swings the tail--knocking Aya into the air conditioning unit on the rooftop*

aya: *YELP*

CLA 1: *swings until flinging Aya away--and off the roof*

aya: !!!

*the scenery around her changes from brick walls to...checkerboard patterns*

aya: huh?

*she's in Anne's Room...but the gravity is all reversed*

aya: *she grabs a hold of a toy soldier's gun*

Toy Soldier: O_O *the arms snap off with the gun* "..." *looks down at its missing hands*

*more portals open up--showing a couple at a restaurant, a bathtub, and someone drinking milk out of the carton--*

Joker: "..." *wipes milk off his mouth* "There's something you don't see every day..."

*one portal shows CLA 1 slithering to a vehicle to unload Lucy*

aya: !?!?! *JUMPS IN*

CLA 1: *drops Lucy into the back* *to the driver* <Get going.>

aya: HI-YAH!

CLA 1: "?!!!" <What the-->

-POW-

CLA 1: X_X *KO'ed* *falls, with a slow hiiiiiiiiiss noise...*

*but the vehicle is getting away...*

aya: *looking around*

*there's a bike...*

aya: *hops on and pedals to the metal*

*in the vehicle*

CLA 3: <This girl managed to transport all of the shipment into some extra dimension. She was formerly in the Guild.>

???: is that right?

CLA 3: <Yes. But nothing the informant gave us told us how to get the shipment out of that space...> *holds up a pair of pliers* <We'll need to convince her...>

-THUNK-

???: what was that?

aya: *hanging on for dear life*

CLA 3: *looks in the rearview mirror* "?!! We got a gremlin on the van!"

aya: LET ME IIIIIN!!

CLA 3: *growls--turns left, moving into the left lane where oncoming traffic is coming at Aya...*

aya: O-O;

Spirit: *driving his car--and seeing Aya on the side* "?!!!" *slams the brakes, swerving out of the way*

aya: OHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCK!!

Spirit: "SHIT SHIT SHIT--"

*crashes into a light post*

Spirit: *face-first into airbag* "..." *pokes it with his scythe* "..." *dials 911*

aya: SORRY!

CLA 3: "..." <Get her off the van, now.>

Lucy: *still sleep-murmuring* "Nggh...No, I don't care if you're a skunk, you can't have tea with the tiger..." *snores*

*in a police car*

Minoura: *listening to the radio* "??? A van with a little girl on the side? Are these people high?"

*then the van passes--*

aya: MY FRIEND IS BEING KIDNAPPED!

Minoura: "?!!" *turns on the sirens* "Damn Death City wackiness..." *follows*

CLA 5: *holding a chain scythe--climbs the van roof, aiming at Aya*

aya: D8

CLA 5: *hurls it--*

*a portal opens up in front of Aya--*

CLA 5: *pulls back the scythe--which has stabbed through a teddy bear* "...?"

aya: thank you deus ex machina!

CLA 3: <What is happening up there?!>

Lucy: *yawns, sits up, stretches* =_______= "My neck hurts...This pillow is as hard as a rock." *looks around*

Lucy: "... ... ... ... ..."

*the van shakes*

Lucy: "WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON HERE?!!!"

aya: WOAH!

Minoura: *on megaphone* "Attention van driving recklessly! You are under arrest! Pull over or--"

*ninja stars fling into the megaphone, knocking it out of his hand*

Minoura: "?!!!"

Lucy: *looks out the window--and spots Aya* "?!! Aya!"

aya: LITTLE HELP HERE?!

Lucy: "R-Right! Just give me a second to--"

CLA 3: *aims a dart--*

*CLA 3 wasn't looking and hits a speed bump--*

CLA 3: *swallows the dart* "... ... ..." *passes out* X_X

Lucy: *bounces with the bump* "AAH!"

aya: ACK!

Lucy: "!!!" *opens the door, pulling Aya inside*

aya: oh jeez! now what?

CLA 5: *hops back in, menacingly approaching with the scythe chain*

Lucy: "What is even happening here?"

*the van is approaching the highway...CLA 3's asleep foot is on the gas...*

Minoura: *racing after the van...*

aya: ok....i may have a plan. it's probably really stupid, so unless you have a better idea, just hear me out...

Lucy: @~@ "I'm still groggy, so talk fast!"

aya: on the signal, we bum rush this creep and jump!

Lucy: *nods* "Okay..."

aya: ok....one...two.....NOW!

CLA 5: *tosses the scythe*

Lucy: *battle cry*

aya: HYAAAAAAH!!!

Lucy: *tackles CLA 5*

CLA 5: "?!!"

aya: JUMP!

Lucy: *follows*

-slow-mo jump and screaming-

CLA 5: *slow mo* "Get back here, you--" *sees the van heading to the barrier of the highway* "Oh fu--"

Lucy: *grabs Aya's hand* "Hang on!"

*the van goes over the highway--*

Minoura: "?!!!" *slams the brakes*

-SLAM-

aya: *face pressed up against the cop car's front window*.....ow.

Lucy: @~@ *slow SQUEAK sound as she falls down to the hood*

*behind them, the van has crashed into the canal...a duck is pecking at CLA 3's hair*

-elsewhere-

sayaka: and then nagisa trapped some of homura’s bombs in her bubbles and when they got close- BOOM! double damage!

Crona: O_O; "Oh my."

kyouko: i'm still sore. *stretches* hey soul! you got pizza rolls?

homura: *documenting her notes*

Damon: "Oh, can we have some, too!"

soul: ok, one big batch of pizza rolls coming on up!

Damon: "Do you do this often? Fighting those--um...what are they?"

homura: the technical term for the main monsters are 'wraiths'. while the smaller ones are 'familiars' or 'minions'.

sayaka: not to be confused with those little yellow dudes in overalls.

homura: -_-;

mami: they usually appear for two main reasons; one of which is occasional time-space rifts between our world and an alternate world.

becky: so are they like kishin eggs?

mami: well, i suppose they are, but at the same time they arent. but the presence of wraiths can cause imbalance in the natural magical energy of the universe, and so we puella magi go in and correct the issue and stabilize the balance. think of it as technicians fixing a breaker.

homura: however, we cant afford to be careless; if our soul gems become completely dark mid-battle, we revert back to our normal form, leaving us vulnerable until it's cleaned.

becky: wow, being a magical girl is way different than i thought it was.

homura: *side glance* you have no idea.

Damon: ._. "...Can we go back to 'alternate world'? Like, a multiverse?"

sayaka: ^^; wwwhy dont we play some smash bros, huh?

Damon: -_-#

homura: yes, that sounds excellent.

Damon: *sighs* "Okay..."

-elsewhere-

*Izumi's phone rings*

izumi: ??? *checks it*

*phone call from Unknown number*

izumi: ??? ....

???: "Is this Izumi Albarn?"

izumi: yes?

???: "This is Detective Minoura with the Death City Police."

izumi: is something wrong?

Minoura: "Well, your dad's going to be late picking you up..."

Spirit: *sobbing over the hood of his car*

izumi: did something happen??!!

Minoura: "Your father is fine--just some cuts from a car crash, no fatalities--"

izumi: WHAT?!?!?

Minoura: "He wants you to stay put at the DWMA until he can get a police ride over, once the EMT finish--"

izumi: WHAT HAPPENED?!

lukas: izumi?

Minoura: "It's...a bit of a long story, and we're investigating what exactly happened--"

Saria: "???"

-elsewhere-

Kunikida: *running* *looking around the street*

aya: and then she got kidnapped by these sneople!

cop-chan: what?

aya: snake people! sneople!

Lucy: *holding an ice pack to her head* "I don't remember much after passing out..." *her neck is bandaged*

Kunikida: "!!! AYA!"

aya: !! kunikida! over here!

Kunikida: *stomps over* "..." *picks her up in a hug*

aya: !!

Kunikida: "Thank goodness you're okay..." *then holds her, shaking her by the shoulders* "HOW DID YOU GET THIS INJURED?! DID YOU BLOCK?!!"

-aya explains what happened to the best of her ability-

Kunikida: "...I knew this mission was not for you--the Crimson Lotus are not to be trifled with."

aya: but i saved lucy, didnt i?!

Lucy: "Darn right! Aya packed a punch, Kunikida--" *swings her arm while holding the ice to her head* "--popping through portals and even having a toy soldier's gun!"

Kunikida: "... ... ...How hard did you hit your head?"

aya: ...welllll....

Lucy: >~< "I know what I saw! Just ask all those bystanders, like that man!"

Spirit: *sobbing still over his car*

Kunikida: "... ... ...That man does not seem to be in the right emotional state."

-elsewhere-

Yosano: *staring at an invitation* "...Huh. Guess I'm taking off that day."

kirako: what is it?

Yosano: "A wedding invite."

kirako: ooh!

Yosano: *fans the invitation* "That means a new outfit~"

-elsewhere-

tachihara:....she was just.....eating.....a whole fucking tomato.....that gremlin is anything but normal!!

Pushkin: "You should see her with an onion."

tachihara:......WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!?!

Pushkin: "??? What? We don't judge you and your stupid nose-bandage."

tachihara:...it's not stupid.

Pushkin: "How long have you had a cut under there? Or is it to open up your nasal passages? Please don't tell me you wear it to look cool."

tachihara: none of your business.....

katya:....*pulls out eggplant*

tachihara: what are you doing?

katya: *starts eating it while maintaining eye contact*

tachihara: stop that!

katya: *advances toward him*

Pushkin: *snickers*

tachihara: g-get away from me! *RUNS*

katya: *SPRINTS AFTER HIM*

gin:.......i'd scold you both if this wasnt absolutely hilarious.

Pushkin: "Are we growing on you?"

gin: dont push your luck.

Pushkin: QwQ " 'Kay..."

-elsewhere-

Daisy: "Filing is done..." *falls on top of her desk* =______= "Please tell me it's 5 o'clock."

eckleburg: *glances at the clock*

*it's only 3:45*

Daisy: *face down* *GROAN*

eckleburg:.... ^^; would you like some coffee?

Daisy: "..." *thumbs up, not even looking*

eckleburg: ok. one coffee coming right up.

Daisy: "...Thanks, Teej."

-elsewhere-

Axel: =~= "I hate this heat. Hit me up with a slushee, my good sir."

Hyde: *sets down the cup* "Pick your poison, buddy."

zeke: blueberry please.

Hyde: "Good choice--we just repaired it--" *shouts at a layabout customer* "NO FREE REFILLS, YOU THIEF!"

Emine: "..." *fills it up again*

kirika: tch- amateur.

Hyde: "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF I WENT TO YOUR PLACE AND STOLE ALL YOUR SHIT?!!"

kirika: simple, i'd break both your legs.

Hyde: "I'd rip off my legs and beat you with them!"

Axel: OwO;

Emine: "..." *slides a candy bar into his pocket*

-elsewhere-

maki: *aggressively making omelets*

Anya: ._____.;

Meme: "Could I have onions in mine?"

maki: SURE THING!

Anya: "Goodness, is this 'aggro'? Or 'hangry'?"

tsugumi: are you sure you're alright?

maki: OF COURSE! NEVER, BETTER!! OwO##

Anya: "..."

Meme: ^^; "Have you talked to your bro?"

-elsewhere-

Takehisa: *stares at the empty desk*

shinra: she'll be back soon, right?

Takehisa: "She has been reassigned."

shinra:.....

Arthur: "But we want her back now--"

Takehisa: "NOT. NOW."

-elsewhere-

Spirit: "And then this rassafrassing van was coming at me!"

izumi: ....

Spirit: "....Sorry."

izumi: it's fine...im just glad you're ok...

Spirit: *nods* "These things can be fixed...Lives can't."

izumi:......

Minoura: *pulls over* "Here you are."

izumi: thank you officer.

Minoura: -_-# "Detective...."

izumi: r-right! right!

Spirit: "Thank you." *hands his card over* "We'll be in touch."

-elsewhere-

Yumi: *sets Shiori down in bed*

shiori: *yaaawn*

Yumi: "Sleep well, sweetie." *forehead kiss*

-morning-

Vulcan: *working in the garage* "The ride should be ready after breakfast...You're going to the 2nd today?"

Akitaru: "Yes. Thanks for doing this..."

nozomi: do you want me to come with, sir?

Akitaru: *nods* "Sure thing--we need you and Viktor to explain your findings better than me or the Lieutenant could."

nozomi: right...

Takehisa: *cooking breakfast* "..." *he's letting the hashbrowns burn...*

*smoke is coming out of the kitchen*

tamaki: *SPRAYS HIM DOWN WITH THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER*

Takehisa: *covered in foam...removes his glasses, revealing skin under the foam*

Akitaru: "?! Hinawa, what the hell?!"

Takehisa: "I was distracted."

-elsewhere-

maki:........

Anya: "Oh, that uniform looks absolutely common--congratulations!"

maki: OwO# why THANK you anya!!

Anya: ^^; "And I see you're wide awake...And no one has made coffee yet..."

Meme: *nudges Anya in the ribs*

Anya: "??? Meme, are you okay? Muscle spasms?"

Meme: "..." *nudges again* "Yes."

-elsewhere-

Honda: "TODAY, WE WILL BE INVITING MEMBERS OF THE 8TH TO OUR BASE--SO I WANT OUR BASE TO LOOK SPOTLESS!"

soldiers: SIR YES SIR!

Hajiki: "I got my toothbrush ready, sir."

*thundering footsteps are heard--then a BONK on the ceiling*

???: "OW!"

Honda: "???" *looks at his watch* "Oh, he's early..."

hito: ??

Danro: *ducks under the overhang* "Ah, Honda--you need to raise the ceiling around here..."

hito: ._.;

Hajiki: "...What the hell happened to Juggernaut?! HE GOT SUPER OLD!"

Danro: "... ... ..." Q_Q;

hito: -_-; noto's right beside you, haijiki.

Takeru: O_O;

Haijiki: *GASP* "DOPPLEGANGERS!"

Honda: "J-Just come with me--we'll talk in private, away from buffoonery."

-elsewhere-

Sasori: *kneels down* "The Knights of the Purple Smoke are at your disposal."

Ritsu: "As I know~"

orochi:.....

Ritsu: "Here is the map where to lure our new 'fuel.' Be sure these are the only entrances into the Nether that are open--all others must remain closed at this time."

-elsewhere-

Hibana: "Morning." *picks up the newspaper* "Did the repairperson fix the espresso machine?"

Rino: *holding a crowbar over the espresso machine, huffing and puffing*

ryuuko: it's a work in progress. oh, my parents are going to be hosting a fundraiser dinner and invited you to attend.

Hibana: "Lovely--thank your parents for the invitation. When?"

-elsewhere-

Asher: *waiting at the bus stop* "So, how long's your dad's car in the shop?"

izumi: for about a few days i guess.

Asher: "Sucks."

izumi: well, do you have any plans for the summer?

Asher: "Avoid the heat, go to the library--they have air conditioning."

izumi: ah. well, my parents wedding is coming up, so....did you want to maybe, i dunno...go as a plus-1?

Asher: "... ... ...Sure."

izumi: really?

Asher: "They got food, right?" *small smirk*

izumi: ...*small smile* yeah.

Asher: "Cool. ...I'm rocking that tuxedo t-shirt."

-elsewhere-

Pushkin: *getting measured* "We got to talk about the color of the suit, though--that yellow is going to burn my retinas, man."

Motojiro: *also getting measured* Q____Q "I can do this...I can do this...I AM SCARED OUT OF MY WITS."

hirotsu: try to relax, gentlemen.

Tachihara: *looking at ties* "And they call us criminals--these prices are nuts."

naoya: *checking out suits* hmmm…

Chuuya: "The vest is a good touch on this one."

naoya: totes.

Chuuya: "I hope the girls get good outfits--Miyuri was screaming with excitement."

-elsewhere-

miyuri: WOOOOW! they're all so pretty!!

Gin: -______- "None of this looks like 'me.'"

katya: same, im not really one for dresses.

Kouyou: "Child, stand still--we need to get you dressed."

miyuri: ok grandma!

Dress Maker: ^^;;; "You excited for the big day, Miss Leo?"

leo: y-yes...is it perhaps possible to get a dress with a stretchier fabric? *rubs her stomach*

Dress Maker: "Trust me, I specialize in this." *picks up a fabric--it glows for a second and stretches* "See? My gift..."

leo: oh!

higuchi: so then you're....

Dress Maker: "Carlyle."

leo: it's a pleasure to meet you.

-elsewhere-

Kunikida: "And you are not getting out of my sight--today, it's paperwork, all day!"

aya: TT3TT

Lucy: "You are way too high strung..."

Kunikida: "And you have paperwork, too!"

Lucy: TT3TT

kirako: kunikida, perhaps you're being a little too hard on them?

Kunikida: "Finishing paperwork is part of the job--if they want missions, this is a good learning experience."

Dazai: *whispers to Aya* "Then just get the next flunkie to do the work _for_ you!"

aya: *CHOP*

Dazai: "OW!"

Lucy: "Serves you right!" *holds up a file labeled 'Dazai'* "Do your own rotten paperwork!" *throws it at him*

aya: and pay your stupid tab!

Lucy: *smirks*

Dazai: Q_Q "President, can we retroactively remove people from the Agency--"

fukuzawa: -_-;

Tanizaki: ^^; "In any case, there are more missions that need addressing, since we'll be short some people this week."

-elsewhere-

maki: *sitting at a desk, giving off a rather frightening aura*

Sushimasa: *humming to himself, carrying tea* "Oh, our newest recruit! Welcome, Miss Oz--"

maki: *HEAD SNAPS TO LOOK AT HIM* OH! he-LLO Lt General!! Owo##

Sushimasa: "... ... ..." *dumps tea into a nearby potted plant--and shuffles back into the wall* "H-Hi!" ^^;;;;;;;;; "H-How are you adapting?"

maki: im....just....FINE! ^^####

Sushimasa: *stares at claw marks on Maki's desk* "...GREAT! I JUST REMEMBERED I LEFT MY GRANDMOTHER IN THE DISHWASHER--EXCUSE ME!" *runs away screaming*

maki:......*grumbles*

captain: so that's general oze's daughter, huh?

Colleague: *nods* "Yeah--quite a catch, isn't she?"

captain:.....sure hiraoka, whatever you say *sweatdrop*

Hiraoka: "Watch this..." *saunters up to Maki's desk, rests an elbow on it* "Hello, there--"

maki: *GLAAAAAAAAARE*

Hiraoka: "... ... ..." ("HOT BUT CRAZY EYES.") *stands upright* "CAPTAIN HIRAOKA, REPORTING FOR DUTY!" *salutes*

maki: how....NICE! ^^####

Hiraoka: "WE ARE HAPPY TO HAVE YOU HERE! IF I CAN BE OF ANY ASSISTANCE, PLEASE DO NOT HESITATE TO ASK!" (*screaming internally*)

-elsewhere-

Viktor: *looking out the Matchbox window at the 2nd* "A very...bellicose base."

nozomi: i'd suppose so... ^^

Akitaru: *steps out* "You okay? Your driving seemed off today."

Takehisa: "I am fine."

*the Matchbox has a Stop sign wedged in the front--and someone slammed against it like an ornament*

nozomi:.... *exits*

Mineta: *muffled screaming against the hood*

nozomi: EEP!

Akitaru: "..."

Takehisa: "..." *picks up Mineta by the head--and slams him into a nearby trash can*

Viktor: OwO;

Akitaru: >_> "No-Nozomi, let's just get inside."

Haijiki: *sweeping in the front*

nozomi: *follows*

*everyone is dressed in military uniforms*

Viktor: "Jeez, I feel underdressed--maybe I should've put on the jumpsuit if walking into this place..."

officer: commander oubi, i presume?

Akitaru: *salutes* "Yes, hello. Commander Honda summoned us."

officer: right this way...

-elsewhere-

detective: takigi?

Takigi: *staring intently at maps, photographs, crime reports*

detective: shouldnt you be taking it easy? you sustained a lot of damage after all...

Takigi: *looks up* "Oh! Sorry, didn't see you--" *puts down the files* "Forget that--I'm built to recover. But you--how are you holding up?"

detective: doing better, thanks to you.

Takigi: *nods* "Good...Was getting worried--parents came by, girlfriend came by, had heard you were already released but hadn't seen you..."

detective: sorry i didnt come by sooner, had to see the family, you know?

Takigi: "...Yeah. Still working on that."

*his phone shows numerous dialed calls to 'Maki'*

detective:...

Takigi: "...Well, onto more important news: what is left of that lab?"

detective: hardly anything worthwhile...

Takigi: "..." *crumbles up a wad of paper with one hand--aims at the waste basket* "A secret organization, willing to kill its own and anyone who finds them...and destroy the evidence." *toss* *the paper lands in the waste basket*

detective: your sister's one tough cookie to face off with these maniacs...

Takigi: *frowns, balls up another paper* "It's that Hinawa bastard who pulled her into that hell..." *toss--and misses*

-elsewhere-

Yohei: "Be a good boy for the doctor--this is just to check you out."

toru: >~<

Dr. John: "What a brave boy he is..." *picks Toru's foot up carefully*

toru: >~~<

Dr. John: "..." *tickle* "This little piggy--"

toru: !! hehe!

Yohei: "See? Doc is full of laughs..."

Dr. John: "Reflexes are good for a child his age."

-elsewhere-

Kepuri: *in a junkyard* "Okay, catch!" *tosses a hunk of metal*

mana: woah!

Shotaro: *catches it* "This is the coolest thing ever! ...What is it?"

Kepuri: "It will be a new jet engine--after some modifying." *tosses down a rope, scaling down the junk*

mana:...should we really be here?

Kepuri: "??? What? The guy who usually does this is busy today--and isn't returning texts."

mana: *sweatdrop* riiiight...

Shotaro: "So breaking the law and stealing stuff is a good deed if it helps someone else who was going to break the law do it?"

Kepuri: "See? Shotaro gets it. Be like Shotaro, Mana." *head pat*

mana: -_-; *looks toward the building*

Shotaro: OwO "All those animal heads..." *moves* "I wanna touch..."

-elsewhere-

maki:.....

-phone buzzes-

naho: [hey maki! hope you're ok! QAQ]

Naomi: [same! we <3 u!]

maki: ....*sad smile* [hanging in there as best as i can. havent stabbed anyone, so so far so good.]

Naomi: [u need us to come down there and show them who's boss?]

maki: [it's fine, wouldnt want you two getting in trouble on my behalf]

Naomi: [maybe meet up when things get less stupid?]

maki: [i'd like that. tsugumi's letting me stay at her dorm till things cool down]

Naomi: [neat! like a big sleepover]

naho: [cool! if ur hosting a party, maybe i can see if otogii, lila, or the others want to come with. not higan tho. no old geezers allowed >3<]

Naomi: [kyoka would love it]

maki: [cool, maybe we could invite tamaki too, kana misses her.]

Naomi: [yuuuuuus! kyoka likes her too]

naho: [yay!]

-elsewhere-

nozomi: ._. .....m-mr....honda?

Honda: *his head is wedged into a hole in the ceiling high up--he shouts down* "HELLO! CAN YOU HEAR ME DOWN THERE?!"

Danro: *epic eyebrows of confusion*

nozomi: .____.;;;;;;;;

Viktor: OwO ("His cranium...It's super-powerful!")

Akitaru: "...YES! GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN, GUSTAV! HOW ARE YOU?!"

Honda: "PRETTY GOOD! NOW, COULD OUR TWO FORENSICS EXPERTS PLEASE EXPLAIN TO MY SUBORDINATES?"

nozomi: r-right! *gets her notes in order* let's see here... ah, yes- the nether...

Viktor: *pulls out a small box from his lab coat, sets it down--and it projects onto the wall* "The map of the Nether."

*one lieutenant is watching*

Ayabe: "..."

Viktor: "Initially, we assumed the Nether was limited to just this one subway station, abandoned and now quarantined. After our research, we have determined that the Nether is more widesprea--"

*CRASH*

nozomi: !!!!!

Honda: *has landed on the floor, his head stuck in the cracked cement* "...Don't mind me--please proceed."

Viktor: "...We...think the Nether is actually a number of disparate locations, like a spider-web, so the Hoods could be in any of a number of underground locations."

nozomi: r-right. over the years, most parts of the nether have been caved in, given new subway systems and other pathways.

Viktor: *nods* "All giving the Hoods cover to appear and disappear without being noticed."

Ayabe: "Too many sites to search one at a time...Sir, this needs a simultaneous attack."

Honda: "Hmm..."

nozomi: general oze, your son, takigi, was researching one area, from what i gathered in the reports, is this true?

Danro: "..." *grave nod* "That location was bombed, caving in any path in or out."

nozomi: hmm, though looking at the map of the underground, there could be some overlapping connections to the nether that are still open, so perhaps we can investigate them.

Honda: "And the 8th knows those paths better than my team, while the 2nd has the numbers you'll need to guide us."

nozomi: right.

Ayabe: "I propose one member of the 8th to guide a team of 2nd soldiers."

hito: that would make the most sense.

Akitaru: "Agreed--and I want one nun per team, too, to put those suffering at peace."

Ayabe: "Why? What difference does it make, if it's to kill those Infernals?"

Akitaru: "..."

jonas: ......

Honda: "*ahem* "I will make sure to notify the troops about tomorrow's mission."

-elsewhere-

Hirotsu: *has a stack of books in his study, sipping tea as he jots notes*

-knock-

tachihara: gramps? you in there?

Hirotsu: *places a bookmark* "Yes. Come in."

tachihara: *enters* wow, nice place you got in here. a lot spacier than the last place you had.

Hirotsu: *nods* "I'm still in need of filling out the library." *seems to be a collection of books on his desk--philosophy, art, literature, religion*

tachihara: .....cool knick-knacks. this is...um, taishou era decor, right?

Hirotsu: "...Good eye."

tachihara: hey, just cause im a punk doesnt mean i cant be a little bit cultured, y'know?

Hirotsu: "I didn't doubt it. You don't bring it up, though."

tachihara: ....soo whatcha reading there?

Hirotsu: "I was hitting a wall writing the wedding officiation, so I thought reading my library may help...I'm afraid I'm at an impasse--it feels like it's all been said."

tachihara: ah...

Hirotsu: *small smile* "This volume of love poems...Seemed a little hokey. I was so stumped I even tried Heidegger--that was a mistake, what was I thinking."

tachihara: ....if you think im jealous, im not, ok?

Hirotsu: "??? Jealous of whom?"

tachihara: ....*sigh* it's kinda complicated....i mean, yeah, leo's like, banging hot as fuck, but, she seems better of with kajii, even if this is _kajii_ we're talking about, she'd probably never be too interested in me anyway. and....i guess im a bit jealous of gin, for beating me to the punch...*sigh*

Hirotsu: *ahem* "Yes, well..." ^^; "I know you won't refer to the bride as, um, 'banging,' but it is important to acknowledge these feelings, even as you are obviously accepting what has happened."

tachihara: yeah, yeah, i guess.......maybe, im just scared to make a move, so every time i like someone, they get picked up by someone else. im a real fucking coward, arent i?

Hirotsu: "No, no--everyone has their own pace. But if you see an opportunity, well, it can't hurt to say hello, yes? Just, you know, respectfully."

tachihara:...guess you're right....well, im gonna go down to the quik-e-mart for some stuff, maybe pick up a sandwich somewhere or something, you want anything?

Hirotsu: "...Tea biscuits."

-elsewhere-

Justin: ._.; "M-Me?"

lord death: yes justin, you.

marie: im sure you'll do great!

Justin: "...I-I won't let you down, sir!" *SCREAMING INSIDE*

-elsewhere-

*frogs are all over the grass*

Jacqueline: *looks out the cottage's window* "...?"

kim: i'll call eruka.

Jacqueline: "Good call...Wonder what brings them here."

Frog: *hops onto the windowsill...stares*

kim: well, maybe it's the creek in the backyard.

Jacqueline: "The weather can't be that bad there...Unless something scared them out."

kim:...i'll go have a look.

Jacqueline: "Okay..."

*frogs stare at Kim's movement*

kim: (i swear, if that short-ass kappa is back selling his wares again...)

*something is splashing in the creek...*

kim: *looks*

*giggling is heard*

kim: hey!

*there are sprites playing in the creek, splashing each other--and chasing after the remaining frogs*

Frog: Q_Q *hop hop*

kim: oi! oi!

sprite: *looks up*

Sprite 2: *pops up out of the water--with a fish in their mouth*

kim: what are you doing here?

sprite 3: wouldnt _you_ like to know!

Sprite 4: *scoops up water in their hands--and drops it on top of Kim*

kim: hey! why you little-

Sprite 4: "Hee hee hee! Play with us! Play with us!"

eruka: heeey! *flying in on her broomstick* WOAH! *CRASHES INTO A TREE* ack!

Sprite 2: "..." *spits out the fish* "...Bad landing."

Sprite 4: OwO "Did she die?"

eruka: you are disturbing the wildlife!!

Sprite 2: -_- "You're disturbing our fun."

kim: _why_ are you even here?

Sprite 4: "We were boooooooooooooored and got kicked out of the last body of water, and these yucky frogs were in the way!"

eruka: EX-SCUSE YOU?!

Sprite 2: "She said 'yucky frogs,' you yucky frog." *picks up another fish--and shoves it all into her mouth in one disgusting gulp*

eruka: *GLAAAAARE*

Sprite 4: *picks up Eruka's hat* *imitates her voice* "EXCUSE YOU! BWA HA HA!" >w<

-what happens next is rather terrifying-

Sprite 2: Q__________Q

Sprite 4: *screaming in the distance*

kim:...eruka holy fuck.

Jacqueline: *runs up* "Wh-What happened?!" *has a frog on her head*

eruka: ^w^ justice.

Frog: "..." *hops off of Jacqueline's head and back into the creek...a sprite's wing floats by them*

kim: she just....exploded them. that seems a bit....unethical. ._.;

Jacqueline: "...Understatement. And kind of messy."

-elsewhere-

Vulcan: "So, what do you think?"

lisa:....

Vulcan: "..." *nods* "Yeah, I kind of figured. It's totally fine to not go."

lisa: i...

Vulcan: "..." *offers his hand*

lisa:...i want to help, somehow...

Vulcan: "Well, how about the new radio?"

lisa: yeah...i could do that...

Vulcan: *smiles, nods* "Great--I know the team will appreciate it."

-elsewhere-

sonia:.....

Chuuya: "Sonia? Dinnertime."

sonia: oh, right, ok....

{sonia: *following chuuya out of the tunnel* .........(he's been really quiet...) }

{Chuuya: "..." *looks down at her*}

{sonia:...mr chuuya....did you...love mama?}

{Chuuya: "..." *gulps* "Why are you asking me something like that..."}

{sonia: .......*covers her eyes* b-bright....}

{Chuuya: "..."}

{*something falls onto her head*}

{sonia: ??? w-what is that?}

{higuchi:...it's the sun.}

{*he's put his hat on her head...*}

{sonia:... *hugs him*....papa...}

sonia:....

*his hat is on the hat-rack...he's in an apron, setting food onto the table*

sonia:...thank you, papa...

Chuuya: *smiles* "You're welcome. Did I forget anything? Want more vegetables?"

sonia:...*hug* thank you...for saving me that day.....

Chuuya: "??? ..." *hug* "Happy to..."

miyuri: ~?

Chuuya: "..." *pulls in Miyuri*

miyuri: ^^

Chuuya: "Love you both..."

miyuri: ^w^

Chuuya: "So, you hungry?"

-elsewhere-

Yoh: =_= *yawns...looks out a window...sees lights outside from the plane* O_O;

flight attendant: <did you enjoy your nap, sir?>

Yoh: <WHERE AM I AND WHO ARE YOU?!> *pulls out a book labeled 'Commendations'* <WHERE WAS I GOING?!>

flight attendant: ^^;

Pilot: *over intercom* <Attention, passengers, this is your pilot speaking. We're about another 2 hours away from Los Angeles Airport-->

Yoh: "... ... ..." <Oh! Mana!>

-elsewhere-

Poe: "???" *gets down on all fours, looking at some square outline on the wall along the carpet* "..." *tugs at the square--as it falls open* "?!"

lana: edgar? what are you doing? ._.;

Poe: "I think I found a crawl space in this old house, wallpapered over..." *tries to poke his head in* "I'm afraid I'm not the size for it..." *looks at Lana* "..." *looks up and down* "..." .\\\.; "I'm afraid you're too big as well..."

lana: ^^;

Karl: *pokes his head in--and crawls inside*

Poe: D8>

*scratching is heard inside*

lana: ??

Karl: *yipping, scampering back*

Poe: "KARL!"

*Karl dives out of the crawl space--before a growl is heard inside the crawl space*

Karl: *climbs up to Poe's head, cowering*

lana: .___.;; um...

Poe: "What the devil could be in there--"

*a paw reaches out, scratching*

lana: oh!

Poe: "EEEEEK!" *hides behind Lana*

lana: is that...a cat?

*the cat's head pops up in the crawl space, hissing*

lana: ._.;

Poe: *shivering*

Cat: *stares at Lana* "... ... ..." *sniff*

lana: hey, i think this is the neighbor's cat...

Cat: "..." *hobbles out...falls onto Lana's feet*

lana: ah! he's hurt!

Poe: Q_Q "I'll call the vet..."

-elsewhere-

ManBearFix: *bleeding in the infirmary, holding a clump of hair in his hand* "I SAID THE OTHER GUY STARTED IT!" *turns to Mimeca* "BACK ME UP ON THIS!"

mimeca: *nod nod*

Dr. Sasaki: "Uh huh...Which is why you decided Long-Hair Luke needed a haircut...by pulling his hair out in clumps?"

ManBearFix: -n- "You didn't hear what he said about Mimeca."

mimeca: >n< *shakes fist*

Dr. Sasaki: "That's no excuse for causing more problems with my specimens..."

ManBearFix: "...'Patients'?"

Dr. Sasaki: "Right, what did I say?" *uses another limb to grab a syringe*

-elsewhere-

maki:.....*fiddling with an 8 sigil* ...

Secretary: *fixing her makeup with a mirror* "Perfect!"

maki:...*sigh*

Death the Kid: Secretary: *smiles* "Any plans this evening, Maki?"

maki:....not really.

Secretary: "Well, I hope you're not putting in overtime--this job is killer for letting us have a flexible schedule, time off..."

maki:.....

*a cup of water on the desk starts to ripple with vibrations...*

maki: *glares upwards*

Danro: "Good evening, Maki-chan..."

Secretary: O_O; ("...THE BOSS CALLED HER '-CHAN'?!")

maki: .......

Danro: "I hope your first day went well...I was going home for dinner."

maki:...you sure seem satisfied....is it because your little kitten came to 'where she belongs'? *glares coldly*

Secretary: >_>; "...Welp, I'm heading out! Bye-ee!" *runs*

Danro: "..." *clears his throat* "If you have any problems with work, please direct them to your superior officer in a formal request...If that's all..."

maki: hmph....

Danro: "..." *nods* "Good night..." *marches into his office*

maki:.....*fiddling with the 8 sigil*

{maki: you want me to infiltrate the army?}

{Akitaru: "The army wouldn't be recalling you if they didn't know something else about that attack in the Nether."}

{maki: you think they know something we dont?}

{Akitaru: *nods* "And this recall is an invitation for the 8th to do its job, to act as internal affairs and make sure the Hoods have not infiltrated the military."}

{maki: why couldnt the captain do this?}

{Akitaru: "Well, the recall order was to you, the captain was expelled from the military, and--"}

{Takehisa: *in a ninja outfit*}

{Akitaru: "... ... ...His disguises suck."}

{maki: .....}

{Takehisa: "...Maki, this is important. Only you can do it."}

maki:....*sigh*

-elsewhere-

Relan: *hands the money over* "Thanks--sorry for such a big delivery, but our resident chef has been out of service for a bit."

Hyde: *in a pizza delivery outfit* "Hey, I get paid either way."

Vulcan: "So, tomorrow's the big day..." *passes out plates*

shinra: yeah.....

Viktor: "Have your wills ready and know what to do with your remains. I'm donating my corpse to science!" *nom* ^w^

Relan: "..." *looks at Shinra and Iris* "Be safe..." *rubs his arm cast*

shinra:...we will.

Iris: *nods* "And we have larger numbers than last time..."

Petra: "Tch..." *picks toppings off her slice of pizza with a fork*

-elsewhere-

Kunikida: *asleep in bed*

{Kunikida: *wanders through a dark tunnel, holding onto his firearm* "..."}

{???:....i will.....protect big brother.........}

{-a child is there, her back facing kunikida-}

{Kunikida: "..." *lowers his gun, tenses* "No..."}

{-the child looks back.....her head dangling off her neck, only attacked by a bit of skin-}

{Kunikida: *he drops the gun, then falls to his knees, staring in disbelief*}

{-the child smiles.....her grin stretching unnaturally as blood drips from her empty eye sockets-}

{Kunikida: "STOP! I DIDN'T MEAN FOR THIS TO HAPPEN!"}

{????: wHy diD Y oU lET mE DIEEEEE???}

{Kunikida: "I-I don't know! I couldn't reach you--"}

{-the child starts twitching erratically.....before lunging at him at top speed-}

{Kunikida: *SCREAMS*}

*he feels something cold hit the back of his neck*

Kunikida: *wakes up in a cold sweat, screaming*

aya: *still asleep* zzzzzz

Kunikida: *quietly panting...shaking*

-it's quiet...-

Kunikida: "..." *throws off the sheets, goes into the bathroom, splashes water on his face...pants* "..." *looks in the mirror...he doesn't have his glasses on*

Kunikida: "..." *grabs his coat, puts it on, steps outside*

-it's a warm summer evening, but looks like tomorrow could be a bit rainy-

Kunikida: "..." *looks up at the moonlight...traces its glow down to the courtyard--*

Dazai: " 'Ello!"

*Dazai is stuck in a barrel*

Kunikida: "... ... ..."

Dazai: "So, I hate to repeat the same suicide attempts--"

Kunikida: "Or jokes." -_-#

Dazai: ^^; "Little help?"

-after he is freed-

dazai: *streeeetch* you'd think i'd have learned my lesson after the first time. haha!

Kunikida: "When do you learn anything?" *rubs his eyes*

dazai: =3= .....you look like you couldnt sleep.

Kunikida: "...I would say that's obvious when I'm not asleep. But yes, I was troubled."

dazai: care to let doctor dazai listen to your troubles~? *laying seductively on the grass*

Kunikida: "... ... ...What kind of doctor sexually harasses their patients? And don't say Yosano--or she really will kill you."

dazai: *GASP* oh kunikida! you wound me!

Kunikida: "...Not the worst I could do."

dazai:...seriously though, do you want to talk about it?

Kunikida: "...Just a bad memory."

dazai:.....

Kunikida: "...You weren't there. You were hospitalized."

dazai: .......

Kunikida: "During the investigation into the Rats..."

dazai: *listening*

Kunikida: "That child...My arrest and imprisonment..."

dazai:..........you feel like you could have stopped them...saved them.....

Kunikida: "...Yes?"

dazai:....i can understand.....if i'd stopped him then.....maybe.....

Kunikida: "...You've never talked much about your time in the Mafia."

dazai:........part of me wishes i could forget.

Kunikida: "Sorry--I didn't mean to dredge something up."

dazai:.....can i....stay the night with you?

Kunikida: "...Wait, what?" ._.

dazai:......nevermind.....im gonna call it a night. see you in the morning! *starts heading back to his room*

Kunikida: *sighs* "Fine."

dazai: hm?

Kunikida: "I'm not going to get much sleep anyway. I'll make some tea. How do you like yours?"

-elsewhere-

Asher: *looking up at the ceiling from bed* "...Sis? You up?"

cassidy: hnn?

Asher: "Sorry. Couldn't sleep."

cassidy:.....

Asher: "...I'm going to Izumi's parents' wedding."

cassidy: i heard.

Asher: "How fancy do you think it'll be?"

cassidy: not sure.........i've been looking at legal forums, seeing if it's possible to get custody of one's siblings...

Asher: "...Y-Yeah?"

cassidy:....i want to get us out of this apartment, away from _her_...

Asher: *looks nervously at the bedroom door*

cassidy: dont worry, the door is locked. she's probably passed out on the couch as usual....

Asher: "Thanks...for all of that."

cassidy: ...its not fair we're put through this.....i've always wished we could have had a normal family.

Asher: "Not everyone gets 'normal.' We're stuck with what we got...each other."

cassidy:..yeah...

Asher: "...Sorry. I meant that as a compliment."

cassidy: i know. and hopefully, when i earn enough money, it can just be the two of us.

Asher: "And I'll work, too."

-elsewhere-

leo: *making a smoothie with apples and potatoes*

ayako: *GAG*

Motojiro: ^^;;; "You know, that's actually a prank, to make someone think it's a chopped apple but it's really a chopped potato."

leo: *sniffle*

Motojiro: "??? Leo?"

leo: i-it's fine, motovya, it's just the hormones.

Motojiro: "..." *rubs her back*

leo: *softly purring*

Motojiro: ^w^ *cheek kiss*

-elsewhere-

Free: "... ..." *nudges* "How you holding up?"

eruka: better.

Free: "Man, wild those water fairies got all riled up." *scratches behind his ear*

eruka: water sprites.

Free: "Right, right...What's the difference again?"

eruka: *goes over to the bookshelf and pulls out 'encyclopedia of mythical creatures vol 1'*

Free: "... ... ..." *looks* "...How many volumes are they up to?"

eruka: a lot. lets see here....aha, the fae!

Free: *puts on a pair of reading glasses* " 'The label 'fairy' has been applied to specific magical humanoid creatures of small stature...' So is a human a medium-size fairy, and a giant is a king-size fairy?"

eruka: not exactly.

Free: "Well, it was worth a shot... 'The Seelie court seek help from humans and return kindness when favors done for them.' Oh, that's nice!"

eruka: but which court these sprites belong to is going to be a bit tricky to find out.

Free: "Why not just ask them?"

eruka: well...i did kind of scare them off. ^^;

Free: "Huh. Well, did they seem nice or like assholes?"

eruka: =___=#

-elsewhere-

Water Sprite: "THAT ASSHOLE FROG!"

sprite 2: im sure fynn will be fine....soon....maybe. ._.;

Sprite 1: "HOW DO YOU EVEN RE-ATTACH A WING?!"

sprite 2: -_-; lady titania said she'd take care of it.

sprite 3: i hope so, fynn owes me money!

Sprite 1: "... ... ...Sh-She said that?" ._.;;;;

sprite 2: oh come on, rufus! she might be scary sometimes, but she's still a good queen!

Rufus: >_< "I know! She's just so serious that I didn't think she'd give us the time of day over this!"

sprite 4: as queen of the seelie court, it's her responsibility to assist with each of the fae tribes as best she can.

Rufus: -3- "Would've been nice before that dumb frog attacked...I want to blow up that stupid frog."

sprite 5: if thou wishes to wage ware against the witches, you will only be left in stitches.

Rufus: -_-# "This isn't Ye Olden Times--talk like you're of this era! And that was no witch--that was just some slimy, ugly frog!"

-morning-

Anya: "Good morning, Maki."

maki: zzzz....*YAAAWN*

Anya: "??? Long work day?"

maki: y-yeah....you could say that.

Anya: "Well, you better hurry--or you'll be late."

maki: right, right.

-elsewhere-

aya: *YAAAAAAWN* *looks over to kunikida* ._.

Kunikida: "Zzz..."

Dazai: *has buried his face into kunikida’s chest*

aya:....um....kunikida?

Kunikida: "Nggh...Five more minutes, Aya...Ugh, this blanket is heavy--" *pushes--and feels hair* "... ... ..." *looks* "... ... ..."

aya:....kunikida.....do you have something you want to tell me?

Kunikida: "...At the moment, no."

Dazai: *nuzzle*

Kunikida: -_-#

aya: *inhale* DAZAI GET YER ASS OUTTA BED!

Dazai: "EEEK!" *falls off the futon--and drags down--*

Kunikida: "ACK!"

*CRUSH*

aya: *covers her eyes*

Kunikida: O\\\\O;

Dazai: "..." *feels around--*

*PUNCH*

Kunikida: -\\\\\-# "Yes, it is now safe..."

aya: *peeeek*

Kunikida: *has his blanket pulled up over himself*

Dazai: *face-first into the wall*

-elsewhere-

Yoh: *asleep in Los Angeles Airport terminal* "Zzz..."

*someone passes with a rolling suitcase--and drops something into his lap*

Yoh: "UMPH!" Q_Q;

Yoh: *looks around...*

man: sorry about that. ^^;

Yoh: "F-Fine..." *hands the object back to him--looks to be a package wrapped in brown paper* "You must be in a hurry..."

man: yeah, i have a job interview. so long. *leaves*

Yoh: *waves* "Good luck--"

*a handcuff is put onto Yoh's wrist*

Yoh: "... ... ... ???"

security: ....

Yoh: "... ... ..." <Hello! Would you mind un-cuffing me before I flip you?> *smiles happily*

security: open the bag.

Yoh: <Oh, sure--let me just reach over and-->

*while reaching for his bag, Yoh flips the security guard over his shoulder and onto their back*

security: ?!?!?

Yoh: <Here it is--> *looks down* "...Aw, what's wrong, lying down on the job?" *smirks*

security: @_@ ough....

Yoh: "Well, if that's everything, I have until this evening for my connecting flight, so I better take in the city..." *swings his bag over his shoulder, and drags the security guard behind him*

*a row of security officers block his path*

Yoh: "... ... ..." <Shit.>

-elsewhere-

Akitaru: "Okay, line up."

shinra: ....

Arthur: *holds onto Excalibur*

Takehisa: *carries his rifle*

Petra: *holds onto a book*

Vulcan: *lowers his goggles*

Viktor: *turns on his GPS tracker*

nozomi: the radio's loaded up, sir.

Akitaru: "Thanks. Lisa, Yuu, any machines still need to be loaded?"

lisa: just a few more pieces of equipment, sir.

tamaki: *adjusts her habit*

Akitaru: *nods* "I know we have a lot of conflicting feelings about this mission. The last time we were in the Nether, we saw a lot that shook us, a lot that surprised us...and we almost lost members of our team."

lisa:....

Akitaru: "This time, we have more information to know what awaits us down there. And we will have the 2nd to support us. But I need to know you are with us on this mission. If anyone is going to refuse to enter the Nether, you need to say so now."

lisa: i'll be with yu, managing the radio.

Relan: "I would like to be stationed at radio, too."

Akitaru: "And Shinra?"

shinra: im going in.

Akitaru: *nods* "Happy to hear it." *grabs his coat* "We depart in 10 minutes. Everyone, on board."

-elsewhere-

Haumea: "..." *smiles* "I see you're still obedient. What a good child you've been..." *head pat*

sho: ..........

arrow:.....(he's barely concious......)

Haumea: "Isn't our child just precious, Arrow~?"

arrow:........

Haumea: *frowns* "I said..."

-knock-

Haumea: -_-# "Go answer that!"

arrow: yes?

ritsu: it's time.

-elsewhere-

Joker: "And so, they're all headed to the Nether to face off. Based on what Viktor told me, I took a long time deliberating this, and..." *reveals a chalkboard labeled 'Dead Pool' with the names of each member of the 2nd, 8th, and Hoods* "We're taking bets on which ones survive."

nana:.....what....

ria marcelo: -_____-

Joker: "I think Orochi has good odds. Shinra's plot armor means that's a bad bet." *pulls out red Solo cups and boxes of Lucky Charms cereal* "I wager a glass of Red Balloons on the creator embarrassing Tamaki again with pointless perv pandering."

nana:....what the fuck is he talking about?

ivy: who cares.

Joker: "--and then we can have the 4th come in at the last minute to save the day--" *holds up a clay figure labeled 'Arg'* "--and then Arg unleashes his atomic breath and goes RAWR!" *bumps the figure against an All Might action figure*

scarlet: *WHACK* stop. -_-;

Joker: -3X "Let me have this--it's cheaper than therapy."

-elsewhere-

Kunikida: *marching up the stairs to the office* -_-# "You will say nothing inappropriate, untoward, or embarrassing for either of us. Is that understood?"

Dazai: -3- "I am nothing if not tactful. Besides, nothing happened--you just overreacted. Kind of offensive, actually."

Kunikida: *groans* "...Sorry."

*seems like a bit of noise coming from inside the office*

aya: we're he-

Ranpo: *sitting at his desk* "So, you two are sleeping together."

secretary 1: HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO POOR KIRAKO?!

kenji: congratulations! ^^

Kunikida: OnO# *glares at Dazai* "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"

Dazai: *waves his hands* ^w^; "I said nothing! Ranpo is just that good~"

Kunikida: -_-### "...I don't have time for this. There's work to be done!"

Lucy: "..." *whispers to Naomi* "Working Dazai, that is..."

naomi: it's not my main OTP, but its still cute.

Dazai: *sits at his desk* ^^ "Works for me." *opens his files* "Let's have a great workday everyone!"

Kunikida: -_-# "Aya, slap him."

aya: *kicks dazai in the back of the knee*

Dazai: >_< "OW! Is that any way to treat your Uncle Osamu?"

atsushi: *sigh* just another day at the ADA it seems.

Kyoka: "It's sad when people can't be honest about their feelings."

sylvia:.....

-elsewhere-

Sushimasa: OwO; "G-Good morning, Miss Maki..."

maki:....

Sushimasa: ("Please don't yell at me, please don't yell--") "We have fresh baked goods in the commissary..."

maki:....cool....thanks...

Sushimasa: OwO "..." *squeaks* "G-Good." ^w^; "Well, have a good workday..." *shifts away*

-elsewhere-

*a map shows different locations, labeled 'entrances to the Nether'*

Viktor: "Last time, we focused on one location where the Hoods could only be. But this time, we recognize there is a network of routes where they can enter and leave the underground."

shinra:...

Vulcan: *pulls over* "Okay, this is your stop--Shinra, Relan, Yuu, Lisa..."

shinra: *nod*

Relan: *steps out, grabbing a med kit*

Yuu: *carrying equipment out the back*

Vulcan: *looks at Lisa* "..."

lisa: be safe...

Vulcan: "..." *holds her hand, nods*

-elsewhere-

Heckler's Subordinate: "--and Commander Obi said to read this." *holds up an ebook on her tablet: "How to Talk to Arthur Boyle (a Dumbass)"*

-some giggling among the soldiers-

tatsu: *peeking from the haijima fence* what are they doing?

Subordinate: ._.; "Please don't laugh--the Commander said First-Class Soldier Boyle has to be handled carefully...It's important..."

Kurono: "...Don't stare at the weirdos. You still have training to finish."

-elsewhere-

engo: mr oze....i dont think it's wise for you to be here.

Takigi: *glares* "What's your name?"

engo: it's Engo, sir.

Takigi: "Yeah, and you know mine--and Oze's don't back down. So point me to the entrance or shut up."

Takehisa: *standing at the entrance* "..."

Petra: -_-;

engo: at least wear this protective jacket.

Takigi: "..." *points to his cast* "I can't exactly drape it over me, so put it on my shoulders."

-elsewhere-

shinra: *examining claw marks on the wall* ...

Hebio: "Officer Kusakabe? What did you encounter here to cause those scratches?"

shinra: i think these are new...

Hebio: "...Oh. That's concerning. I suppose a bit has changed since you were here..."

shinra: ……?? what's that you got, hebio?

Hebio: "Oh, it's a new book called 'How To Deal with a Devil'!"

shinra: *looks*................ (GOD DAMMIT ARTHUR!!)

-elsewhere-

Takehisa: "...Detective Oze, I am sorry about your injury. I myself had a shoulder injury recently during the attack on Haijima--"

Takigi: "Is that a joke?"

Takehisa: "...What? I don't joke."

Takigi: "I don't need your pity or this pointless conversation--I'm not going to be fooled, like how you fooled and corrupted my sister. I only need you here to show me through the Nether so I can memorize the path, so do your job competently for once and maybe this time you won't get someone killed!"

Takehisa: *seizes up*

Petra: "... ...Lord, give me strength." -_-#

Takehisa: "I assure you, Detective, safety is my primary concern--"

Takigi: "Savage."

Takehisa: "...I'm sorry?" O_O

Takigi: "Savage. You in the 8th are a bunch of barbaric, backwards savages who have no clue how to protect others, let alone run an efficient firehouse. So shut up and do what I say." *walks in--knocking into Petra on the way*

Petra: "?!" "... ... ..." *inhales* "1...2...3...4..." *counts as she follows*

-elsewhere-

Takeru: *looking around*

Hajiki: "Be careful where you walk, Patty."

tamaki: im not patti, im tamaki. -_-;

Hajiki: "??? Takeru, I thought your girlfriend's name was Patty."

Takeru: ._. "Tamaki isn't my girlfriend?"

Hajiki: "I know--Patty is."

tamaki: -_-; patti isnt even in a fire brigade.

Hajiki: "Oh, right--she's always hanging around that exorcist at True Cross, so she must be from there. Thanks, Aisha!"

tamaki: that isnt even close to my name! >n< .....takeru, you holding up ok?

Takeru: ^^;;;;;;;;;; "Oh, yeah--I'm fine. This isn't really that much different than the cellar back home."

tamaki: the cellar?

Takeru: *nods* "To learn how to better grow potatoes, I tried growing other vegetables in the basement in Qingdao--roots, beans, peas..."

tamaki: huh, well viktor has been trying to grow mushrooms at the 8th's base.

Takeru: "Oh! I should ask him about that! They can be finicky little buggers."

tamaki: maybe......

Takeru: "...Tamaki, are you afraid?"

tamaki: ?? i-im not a fraidy cat! >3< i-...im fine, really...

Takeru: ^^; *nods* "You know more about this place, so I'll be depending on your help finding my way through...because I'm really scared right now." Q_Q

tamaki: w-well try not to wander off to far.

Takeru: *nods fervently* "I have no intention to!"

Hajiki: *walking up ahead, smirks* "Careful, Juggernaut--or Patty will get jealous."

tamaki: that's not how it is! god, cant a guy and a girl talk without people thinking there is romance involved?! jeez!

Takeru: "Yeah!"

Hajiki: "??? Jeez, sorry--didn't mean to offend you, Selena."

tamaki: that's not my name! it's tamaki! ta-ma-ki!

Hajiki: *tenses up, holds up his hand* "Hold it!" *blocks their path*

tamaki: *whapped in the face* ow!

Hajiki: "???" *turns* "Tamaki! Who hit you?!" *aims his gun everywhere* "Were they ninjas?! Were they invisible?!!"

Takeru: -__-;

tamaki: hey take it easy with that!

Hajiki: "What? I know how to aim at targets..."

Takeru: *to Tamaki* "I'm sorry--Hajiki...has some memory-retention problems."

tamaki: jeez, is everyone with a flame ability cursed?

Takeru: "...What?"

{Takeru: *sitting on a small cliff, wiping his eyes, crying*}

{mrs noto: <takeru, sweetie? are you alright?>}

{Takeru: *sniffles* <I hate this...I hate fire...I hate this ability...I hate myself!>}

-BOOM-

Hajiki: "??? What was that? Is that the Lucky Lewd Syndrome Juggernaut warned me about?"

Takeru: *wakes up* .\\\.;

tamaki: *PUNCH*

Hajiki: *stands perfectly still* "..." *blinks* "...What just happened? Where am I?"

*up ahead, there's a small fire on the ground...and what looks to be a body...*

tamaki: ???

Takeru: "...Oh no..."

*it's members of the 2nd, exploded...*

tamaki: w-what the hell?

Hajiki: "This was targeted..."

*they hear something shift up ahead, and moans*

Hajiki: *aims* "Could be more injured...or the perpetrator. Show yourselves!"

*out walks...a row of Infernals...only partially transformed...some with missing limbs, some with their heads caved in...*

tamaki: !!!!!!!!

Takeru: "EEEEEEK!"

*there are holes in their torsos...*

tamaki: t-that...that shouldnt be possible!

Takeru: "They don't have any cores?! THEY'RE ZOMBIE INFERNALS!"

Hajiki: "...Zom-fernals?"

-elsewhere-

hito: *shooting* damn, they just keep coming.

Vulcan: *has on metal boxing gloves--and is wearing a tail to bounce back and forth, knocking Zom-fernals away*

Unlucky 2nd Brigade Soldier: *screams, as they're ripped apart and bitten*

-elsewhere-

ritsu: fufufufu~

Orochi: *bows* "With your permission, I would like to face the intruders."

ritsu: of course, orochi.

Sasori: "How asinine--you should wait for backup."

Orochi: *frowns* "I don't need anyone..." *marches away*

-elsewhere-

*members of the 2nd keep firing, but the Zom-fernals keep rising*

Jonas: "Damn, damn, damn!" *fires shot after shot*

iris: ashes to ashes....

hito: head's up! *throws a grenade*

*the grenade lands inside a Zom-fernal and--*

*BOOM* *body parts spray everywhere*

anton: nice thinking, yasunoki!

Jonas: *SCREAMS*

hito: !!!!

*a Zom-fernal has nabbed Jonas*

anton: JONAS!

*SLICE*

anton: !!!

*a Zom-fernal has stabbed one of their own bones into Anton's back and through his heart*

anton: *coughing up blood*

Runner Guy: "Anton!" *fires shots at the Zom-fernal--*

Zom-fernal: *retracts from Anton, dumping his body--turning onto Runner Guy*

Runner Guy: *panicking--*

Zom-fernal: *rushes--*

*HEAD-ON ATTACK*

Honda: *crashes his cranium into the side of the Zom-fernal, slamming them into the wall*

Runner Guy: "Commander! Th-Thank you--"

Honda: *upside down, stuck in the floor* "!!! LOOK OUT--"

Runner Guy: "???"

anton?: *has stabbed him, groaning*

Runner Guy: "..." *life escapes his eyes, before he coughs up blood and falls down*

hito: w-what the hell...?

Akitaru: *slicing at Zom-fernals* ("Damn it...What have the Hoods done to people?! These...These bastards!")

-elsewhere-

rita: *trembling*

Viktor: Q___Q *curled up under a bar at an abandoned subway restaurant* "This makes no sense, this is not how science works--you can't just reanimate dead tissue through a simple flame--unless it is puppeteering--Wait, like that unnamed puppet girl at Haijima? NO! Like that weird stitched-up necro weirdo in the Hoods! Is that how they were doing this--" *mutter mutter mutter mutter*

Zom-fernals: *striking at soldiers left and right, ripping them apart, biting into the corpses--causing those corpses to glow before they rise and repeat the process to the other living soldiers*

Ohana: *firing shot after shot--until a magazine runs out* "Fuck! Licht, toss me--"

*BANG*

Ohana: *falls down, a bullet through the center of his head...his opened eyes stare lifelessly at Rita*

Zom-fernal: *clutching a smoking gun, aimed at the bar*

rita: !!!!!!!!

Ohana: *motionless*

Viktor: *tearing up, shaking*

rita: *attempts to pray*

*CLUTCH*

rita: *yelps*

Ohana: *opens his mouth to roar--*

*a chair collides with his head, knocking off the top of it*

rita: !!!!!!!!!

Viktor: "GET BACK, ROTTEN CONTRADICTION OF KNOWN SCIENCE! ... ..." *falls down to his knees, shaking* "Oh God, oh God..."

rita: *shaking*

*then Ohana leaps up with a shriek*

rita: !!!!!!!!!!

Viktor: *screams back at Ohana--before picking up Rita*

-elsewhere-

Zom-fernals: *NOM NOM NOM*

Takeru: >~< "EEEEEK! GET THEM OFF OF ME! GET THEM OFF OF ME!!!"

Zom-fernal: *paws at Tamaki, like a kitten*

tamaki: *WHACKS IT*

Zom-fernal: *yelps, falls back like a scared animal*

Hajiki: "Juggernaut, stop squirming." *aims at him--and fires multiple shots into his body*

tamaki: !!

Takeru: *screams in horror*

*but the Zom-fernals run away from Takeru's body and into the shadows*

*Takeru lies motionless, his body and clothes ripped apart by the bullets from Hajiki's gun...*

tamaki: takeru!!

Hajiki: "..." *stares intently at Takeru's body*

tamaki: what did you do to him?!

Hajiki: "Don't worry, Morgana--I know how to aim."

Takeru: *the clothes regenerate--and parts of Takeru's body pop back out* *sits up* "Hello."

tamaki: w-what the-...what?!

Takeru: "You remember back during our mission in China, when those hot dogs ripped my body apart?" *pats his outfit* "Patty's magic clothing! Plus, I know where to shift my body in these layers of clothes so Hajiki doesn't hit any vital organs."

Hajiki: *looks behind them* "...Juggernaut, Mimsie, get behind me." *aims at the shadows*

Takeru: "..." *slowly inches up to behind Hajiki*

Hajiki: *looks at Tamaki* "Start praying."

tamaki: so those clothes...how did patti even get them?

Takeru: "Stocking's mom can make them--it's really neat!" *tugs on the fabric--which pulses like it's alive* "They're really durable--able to survive high temperatures. Kind of like you, Tamaki! Maybe Patty could ask her to make you some?"

tamaki:........ *stares at him dead eyed*

Takeru: OwO; "...Are you okay?"

zom-fernal: GUOOOOH!

Takeru: "EEEEEEK!"

*BANG BANG BANG*

*the Zom-fernals fall like dominos...with Hajiki looking like he barely moved*

Hajiki: "..."

Takeru: >~< "Th-Thank you, Hajiki..."

Hajiki: *reloading his rifle*

tamaki: ......!! behind you!

Hajiki: *flips the barrel over his shoulder and, without turning around, fires--*

*BANG*

tamaki: he's a natural....

Takeru: "He's an inspiration--especially since he won 'Most Valuable Non-Pyrokinetic' in the entrance tournament..."

tamaki: wait, he's a non-pyrokinetic?!

Takeru: ">_>; "Not quite...He does have a fire skill--but he forgot it when he filled out paperwork to enroll in the 2nd."

tamaki: just how bad is his memory?

Takeru: "Pretty bad--he has short-term memory problems. But his eyes are blessed with thermal heat vision--he can spot heat signatures anywhere, even behind walls."

tamaki: so he could see through your clothes and detect your heat signal?

Takeru: "Right--like x-ray vision! ... ... ..." O\\\\\O *covers himself* "EEK!"

tamaki: YOU'VE KNOWN HIM LONGER AND _YOU'RE_ THE ONE FREAKED OUT?!

Hajiki: *firing shot after shot at Zom-fernals, even able to grab guns off the corpses of his departed colleagues to replenish his ammo, without even looking at the targets--and landing every shot*

*a bullet shell flies up*

Hajiki: "..." *sticks out his tongue, catching it*

tamaki:.....

Hajiki: "...Ow! Hot hot--" *spits it out* *pants* "Okay...All targets put down. Tamaki, if you could finish prayers..."

Takeru: *looking over the corpses of their colleagues* "..." *wipes his eyes*

tamaki:....ratomu....

Hajiki: "If we were attacked, so must the others. We better head back to the Commander--" *turns--*

*there's a Hood in the distance*

tamaki: !!

Hajiki: "!!! Guys, get back--" *aims--*

*something goes flying up*

*it lands at Takeru and Tamaki's feet*

tamaki: ah-....

Takeru: "Ah..."

*it's the top of Hajiki's head, sliced at the jaw...*

*Hajiki's body falls to the floor, dead*

tamaki: ah-....*SCREAMS*

Takeru: "HAJIKI!"

*the Hood pulls back her cloak, revealing--*

Orochi: "I am Orochi of the Purple Smoke." *cracks her whip* "I promise to shatter my enemies to pieces."

Takeru: *falls back, panicking*

Orochi: "Shh...Relax. You will join the dead soon."

tamaki: (come on tamaki, do something!) *battle stance*

Orochi: "What's this? A small kitty cat?" *twirls her whip*

tamaki: (that attack killed him in one swipe...her whip, could it have been-)

{Viktor: *taps the heat meter* "Yep--you certainly can get to hot temperatures, exceeding those even of Shinra! That's some talent, Tamaki!"}

tamaki: (but still....was it her whip or an ignition ability? if it was the whip, how did she make it move so quickly? it's almost like rapid...)

*SLICE*

tamaki: AH!!

*despite being so far away, Orochi managed to slice through Tamaki's habit, cutting into her left shoulder*

tamaki: *clutches her wound* gnhh!

Orochi: "Darn...I had hoped to lop off the entire arm. Aren't you durable..."

tamaki: (d-dammit...)

Orochi: *smiles* "Will you be my worthy opponent?" *cracks the whip again, this time it wraps around Tamaki's right arm*

tamaki: !!!

Orochi: *swings the whip--slamming Tamaki into the ceiling and down to the floor*

tamaki: GRK- (come on, fight back tamaki!)

Orochi: "Come on, play! Play!"

*CRACK* *SLICE* *RIP*

tamaki: *screaming out* (dammit....why dont i just move! im not helpless! im not-)

*the whip wraps around Tamaki's hands, as Orochi holds her up above her*

tamaki: im no....helpless...im not-

Orochi: "Look at you...A scared little kitten. Wait..." *takes Tamaki's hand in her chin*

tamaki:......i-

Orochi: "You're that fire-cat Guruna talks about--the one whose skin can withstand any flame..." *pulls the whip tighter, as it burns along Tamaki's wrists*

tamaki: *winces in pain*

Orochi: "You're too valuable to kill..." *smiles wickedly, as she rips the tattered habit off Tamaki* "But I want to see how much damage my whip can do!"

tamaki: !!!!!

Orochi: *pulls Tamaki by her pigtail--*

*PUNCH*

tamaki: AH!

*something knocks into Tamaki's face, like a small pebble*

{-who do you think you're kidding?-}

tamaki: ngh-

*the whip is loosened from Tamaki, as she falls to the floor, her head hitting the floor*

*...but Tamaki can see someone else collapsed on the floor...it's Orochi, knocked down*

tamaki: i-...*looks up*

*there's something white on the floor...it's a tooth*

*someone stands in front of Tamaki, towering over her*

tamaki: w-what-

Orochi: *gets up...one eye is blackened...and a tooth is knocked out...* *lisping* "What the hell?! How dare you--"

Takeru: *offers a hand to Tamaki* "Tamaki...Can you stand?"

tamaki: t-takeru...

Takeru: "Come on--let's get out of here--"

*the whip cracks--smacking Tamaki between the eyes*

tamaki: GYAH!

*Tamaki is knocked--through a wall*

Takeru: "TAMAKI!" *turns--and the whip wraps around his arm*

Orochi: "How dare you touch me!" *cracks the whip, knocking Takeru back and forth between the tunnel's walls*

Takeru: "UGH!" *slams his head against the wall, knocking him out*

{hito: easy, takeru, easy!)

{Takeru: >~< "Nothing is easy! This is really scary! J-Just put the flame away! I don't want to be near it!"}

{Hajiki: "Can you believe this guy, Hito? JUGGERNAUT, YOU'RE FREAKING HUGE!"}

{hito: *looks at hajiki*}

{Takeru: "I-I'm not that big...I'm self-conscious, because I don't fit into most spaces easily--"}

{Honda: "BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE STATURE OF A SOLDIER!"}

{Takeru: "EEEK!" *leaps--into Hito's arms*}

{hito: *KNOCKED DOWN* grk- c-c-command-der!}

{Honda: *picks up Takeru--with one hand*}

{Takeru: O_____O; "H-How--"}

{Honda: "Training! The military will make you strong!"}

{Hajiki: "As strong as you're big! And as courageous as you're big!"}

{-...-}

{Patty: *glomps Takeru* "I LOVE YOU, YOU BIG BAKED POTATO!"}

{-...-}

???: "Yeah...It's a big one. Bring more people to drag him to the arena. And we'll need bindings to hold the cat. No, don't tell her--she'll get in the way--"

*Orochi is on a radio call...*

Takeru: *he's on his side on the floor* "..." *pushes himself up*

Radio: "What's with your signal? It sounds like you're lisping--"

Orochi: *lisping* "Just get here, damn it!" *a shadow passes over her* "???" *looks behind her--*

*a fist slams down--*

Orochi: "?!!" *leaps back, grabbing her whip before--*

Takeru: "YOU BITCH! I'LL KILL YOU!"

Orochi: "..." *smiles wickedly* "Here to protect your feline girlfriend? Fine..." *summons cat o' nine tails*

Takeru: *grinds his feet into the ground, holds out his forearms...then his neck suddenly elongates like a giraffe*

Orochi: "?! WHAT THE F--"

Takeru: *giant machine guns form in flames along his forearms* *his head slams down like a Pez dispenser, as shots fire at Orochi*

-RATATATATATA-

Orochi: "?!!" *she tumbles back, her flame whips trailing her before she twirls to use Medusa Whip, the multi-headed whip, to block these flame bullets* "Jeez! This is nothing like fighting Assault--" *smiles, before grinning like a madwoman* "THIS IS HARDLY A CHALLENGE FOR THE MEDUSA WHIP! BWA HA HA HA!"

Takeru: "..." *stops firing...looks back to see Tamaki's body through the hole in the wall* : "Tamaki!"

tamaki: ..... (i-....) {-look at you, crumbled and naked, just like usual! you cant fight to save your own life!-} i....

{Boy: "Mommy! That girl is naked!"}

{woman: disgraceful.}

{guruna: we're children of misfortune, you and i..}

tamaki: (im....really fucking pathetic, arent i?)

{Middle School Classmate: "You're a slut."}

{Burns: "What a disappointment."}

{mrs kotatsu?: i should never have given birth to you.}

???: "TAMAKI! WAKE UP, NOW!"

tamaki: nnh....

Takeru: "..." *the fabric on his jacket starts to pulse--before new arms pop out*

Orochi: "...What the fuck?"

Takeru: *swings his fist--and clutches Orochi by the throat*

Orochi: *choked*

Takeru: *eyes narrowed*

Orochi: *slapping her hand down on Takeru's hand, suffocating*

Takeru: *pulls back his fist--*

*Orochi managed to wrap her whip around his arm, ripping it off at the shoulder*

Takeru: *SCREAMS IN HORRIFIC PAIN*

{young!sasori: you're falling behind, orochi.}

{Young Orochi: *panting* *lying on her back, flipped over by Sasori* "No..." *shaking, trying to get up again...*}

{-stomp-}

{Young Orochi: "ACK!"}

{young!sasori: you're weak.}

{Young Orochi: *whispers something he can't hear...*}

{young!sasori: ??}

{Young Orochi: *still whispering...*}

{young!sasori: *leans in* ??}

{*CRACK*}

{*Orochi head-butts Sasori*}

{young!sasori: GRK-}

Orochi: *head-butts Takeru* "I TOLD YOU I'M NOT WEAK!"

Takeru: *gasping in pain, holding his stump of an arm*

Orochi: "This world is not fair...You hide behind some infinite supply of fire bullets and that regenerative clothing...You don't know what it is like--" *kicks Takeru in the face*

Takeru: *kicked back*

Orochi: "In this world...the weak die, the strong survive..."

{sasori:....}

{Orochi: *walks by, smirking* "Give up. You'll never catch up."}

{sasori: mind your own business...}

Orochi: *twirls Medusa Whips, like helicopter blades, getting closer to Takeru's face...*

Takeru: *growls...as the jacket covers his stump--regrowing his arm as he creates a Human-to-Surface Flame Rocket--*

Orochi: "?!"

*KA-BOOM*

*there's only smoke...*

Takeru: *coughs...looks around* "Did I do it...?"

*there's a figure standing in the distance*

Takeru: "?! No..."

Orochi: *lowers Medusa Whip...* "..." *looks up, grins widely, her tooth still missing*

{Orochi: *collapsed in a pool of sweat and blood*}

{sasori: *panting*}

{*around them...are the corpses of their former peers, now made into zombies...*}

{-clap clap clap-}

{ritsu: congratulations for making it into the knights of the purple smoke.}

{Orochi: *struggles to look up*}

Orochi: "In the Nether, only the strong survive..." *she tosses her whip at Takeru, slicing along his arms, then his intestines...*

Takeru: *screams in pain, clutching his stomach, as blood pours out...*

tamaki: no....

*something bright shines in front of Takeru--before nine beams of fire blast out through his back*

Takeru: "..." *collapses, face-down*

Orochi: *stands over Takeru...* *looks up and smiles at Tamaki*

tamaki: .....

Orochi: "What a shame. I had hoped today I could face someone who was my type...I never have..."

{Orochi: "AH!" *swings her fist*}

{sasori: *dodges and swipes at her legs*}

{Orochi: "?!" *falls back*}

{sasori: *pins her down* had enough yet?}

{Orochi: "...You know today is the day we face the 2nd and the 8th?"}

{sasori:....}

{Orochi: *smiles softly--*}

{*CRUNCH!*}

{sasori: GRK-}

{Orochi: *kneed him* "Enough? I've only begun..." *pushes him off of her*}

tamaki: *trying to get up*

Takeru: *clutching his gut...there's a giant hole in it...* "Tamaki..." *coughs up blood* "Stay back!"

tamaki: i....i have to.....-

Takeru: "I can do this!"

{Mr. Noto: <Huh--his suitcase is empty.>}

{mrs noto: <takeru?>}

{Takeru: *sitting outside*}

{mrs noto: <takeru? sweetie?>}

{Takeru: <I don't want to go. I don't want to abandon the farm.>}

{mrs noto: <takeru...>}

{Takeru: <I hate this ability. I hate fire...>}

{mrs noto: <i know, but this is an opportunity to learn how to control it. and that nice mr honda is more than willing to help you learn.>}

{Takeru: <But who will take care of the potatoes?>}

{mrs noto: <your papa and i arent going anywhere.>}

{Takeru: <...I just want to help...>}

{-...-}

{Takeru: *flailing his arms* "EEEEEK!"}

{Hajiki: *sparring* "Don't be such a coward!"}

{Takeru: "BUT THAT'S WHO I AM!" >~< }

{Hajiki: "Wrong--you are what you do!" *kicks him down*}

{Takeru: "EEP!" *falls back, rubs his bottom*}

{Hajiki: *offers his hand* "You stand up--you're standing up. You throw a punch, you're punching. You act brave, then you are brave. That's what it means to be a fire soldier..."}

{Takeru: *looking up in awe*}

{-...-}

Takeru: "To protect others..."

{Takeru: "I didn't want to be here like you...I'm not a soldier! I'm not cut out for this!"}

{Hajiki: "I see..."}

{Takeru: "Is this what I should do with my life?"}

{Hajiki: "Only you can answer that, man. So, what's the answer?"}

Takeru: "I am..."

{mrs noto: <we're proud of you no matter what. and someday, your flames of courage will be as big as this potato field.>}

{Takeru: <How do you know that?>}

{mrs noto: <would a coward have the strength to tend this whole field?>}

{Takeru: "???" *looks to the field...he feels the sun on his skin* "..."}

Takeru: "...THE JUGGERNAUT!"

*a giant bomb forms in Takeru's hand*

Takeru: *roars, as he slams the bomb down at Orochi's head--*

*SPLATTER*

*the bomb dissipates into weak flames...as Takeru's hand falls to the floor*

Takeru: *winces...his hand reforms...but now the right sleeve itself is...bleeding?

Orochi: "How sad...So, the magic jacket itself is bleeding?"

Takeru: "I don't care...how many times you rip me apart...YOU ARE GOING TO PAY WITH YOUR LIFE!"

Orochi: *leaps back, whipping at Takeru, slicing at the jacket*

Takeru: *screams in pain*

???: *SCREAMING*

Takeru: "?!"

*the jacket...is screaming*

Takeru: "Hold on...Just a bit longer..." *he's summoning another bomb*

Orochi: *sweating, backing up* "Stand down! Die! Why won't you stop?!"

*SLICE SLICE SLICE*

*the jacket screams again, as Orochi manages to slice the right arm sleeve off, exposing Takeru's hand*

Orochi: "..."

Takeru: "..."

*Takeru hurries to summon the bomb and starts to bring it down--*

Orochi: *lets out a cry, swinging her whip one more time--*

*SLICE*

*Takeru's arm is sliced at the wrist*

Orochi: "HA!"

*...and that hand still has the bomb in its clutches, as gravity brings it down*

Orochi: "!!!"

*Orochi's throat tightens, cutting off her voice before--*

*The bomb connects with her cheek--ripping it apart, her tongue sliced off...*

*BOOM*

*An explosion engulfs this sector of the Nether*

*the flames rush at Tamaki*

tamaki:.....*closes her eyes*

-elsewhere-

felisia: !!!

Mephisto: "??? What's wrong?"

felisia: i.... i dont know....

-elsewhere-

[howtohero]

Communicators

In any relationship you’re going to have you’ll quickly discover that communication is key. Without being able to communicate with your partner or the people around you you’ll never be able to grow close to them or gain an understanding of them and they will in turn be walled off from you. This is no different when you’re dealing with other superheroes. When you’re fighting or working alongside someone, especially in a high-pressure situation like an intergalactic gladiator arena or while trying to escape from the belly of a giant whale. In order to do that though you’re going to need to make sure you’ve all got the right kind of communication devices.

Communication technology has evolved a lot throughout the years of superherodom. In the far flung past the only way superheroes could communicate with each other across a crowded battlefield would be to shout really loudly. This was, naturally, not very useful especially when like 80% of the people superheroes were fighting were actually dinosaurs who were much louder than them. Many of them died. Again, communication is key folks. Make sure you write that down somewhere. 

As time progressed superheroes developed more and more sophisticated ways of keeping in contact with one another. There was the year everybody decided tying letters to bricks and chucking them at each other was a good idea. That was actually very effective at bringing down the crime rate. Nobody wanted to risk getting struck with an errant brick in the middle of a fight. Then we saw people writing notes in the ground. This wasn’t too great, people kept having to look down while fighting which is a great way to get yourself knocked on your butt. Not to mention the fact that all of these methods ignore the vast amounts of illiterate superheroes. Then finally the super-scientist Phone-Inventor-Man (real name unknown) decided to get off his butt and live up to his name by inventing the phone. Finally superheroes would be able to talk to each other and coordinate during a battle without having to do any pesky reading. The first superhero phones (I’m specifying superheroes here because to the localized weird factor field that surrounds all superheroes, superhero technology is always a couple of steps ahead of boring civilian technology.) were clunky and difficult to carry around to fights, though they made for useful bludgeons on more than one occasion. Due to their lack of overall portability though they were not very popular and many superheroes still fell to the perils of miscommunication (sitcom or otherwise). 

Eventually one brilliant superhero, Floatsam, the Footless Defender, had the idea to put his giant telephone in his shoe. You see, Floatsam had no feet, he didn’t need them, he could float (before you ask, no his name wasn’t Sam that would go against our codename rules) but he always wore shoes, to fit in with the other kids. He’d just tie the ends of his pant legs around his shoes to keep them in place. But it’s not like there was anything in the shoes. Which meant that was just free real estate. So Floatsam decided to put those shoes to use and carry around his phone there. This was, obviously, revolutionary. A phone in a shoe? Outrageous! Scientists around the world crunched the numbers and determined that this could revolutionize the entire communications industry. Soon they were putting phones in shoes. Like straight up combining the two. Absolutely insane, those madmen. Then if superheroes ever needed to communicate with one another in the heat of battle all they needed to do was remove their sweaty shoe and hold it up to their face. While hopping around so they don’t injure their bare foot. Truly this was the peak of communication technology. But there were even greater advances to come. 

With the rise of watches people realized that it could be possible to carry around things that used to be mounted to walls on your wrists. If it was good enough for clocks, surely it was good enough for phones. Who do clocks even think they are? Telling us what time it is. And so the first watch-phone was developed by the British branch of Armada, the global organization tasked with dealing with “the weird.” This watch-phone, known as the fob’n’phone (or hob’n’bone) instantly became standard for all superheroes. Unfortunately, the original fob wasn’t very good at being a phone. Instead it just emitted an ultra-sonic frequency that heroes with super-hearing could hear. It didn’t actually allow for any actual communication. It was really more of a beeper. A beeper for a very specific subset of the superhero community. So how did it become so widespread you may ask. Well, the UK Armada marketing team did a jolly good show of lying their britches off to superhero investors. For demonstrations they replaced the ultrasonic sound chip with a prerecorded message that made it appear as though the demonstrator was holding a conversation with some bloke on the other end. Pretty ingenious actually. By the time anybody realized they’d been had the watches were already everywhere. A lot of harm was caused by those guys. But at least guys like Ultrazounds and The ‘Earo felt very popular for a bit. 

The next major communications innovation (communinnovation) came when a group of Canadian special forces soldiers came across a wendigo in the Nova Scotian wilderness. The wendigo baked them cookies, as one does when a group of heavily armed men show up at their cave, and gave them shelter for the night. When the group awoke they each discovered that they’d manifested incredible powers during the night. They then did the only sensible thing that they could. They abandoned their mission and joined forces with the wendigo, whose name by the way, was MacFarlane, to protect the Canadian wilderness from villains or whatever. They kept all their army gear, because it was neat and because they weren’t in the mood to walk back to base to return it, meaning that they were able to use military-grade walkie-talkies to communicate with one another in the field. Believe or not, AWOL (A Wendigo Offered us Love)  was the first superhero group to ever think to use walkie-talkies for internal communications but they were far from the last. Walkie-talkies quickly became the de-facto superhero communications device. This even improved inter-superhero team relations. Superhero teams could tune into each other’s walkie-talkies channels when working together, meaning superheroes from different teams were free to team-up without worrying about being able to talk to one another. But the walkie-talkie method was not without its drawbacks. Just as it was easy for superheroes to jump on each other’s channels, so to was it easy for supervillains to listen in on superhero conversations. All they needed to do was buy the same kind of walkie-talkie as the heroes were using and fiddle with it until they found the channel they were looking for. This actually wasn’t as big of a problem as you’d think though. Supervillains have some kind of compulsive need to gloat so as soon as they found the right channel they’d shout “I have you fools now! You should’ve known that you couldn’t hide from me, The Listener, for long! MWUHAHAHAHAHA” so everybody would just rolls their eyes and switch channels. <I’m going to be honest here, when I took this job I thought I would be privy to a lot more superhero communications but you guys don’t really get a lot of mail do you.> Hush you! The other downside though was that walkie-talkies are very hands-on communications devices, you need to hold down buttons, you need to play with dials, that’s exactly the kind of stuff you don’t have time for when you’re fighting a sentient meteor shower. 

For a long time this issue boggled and befuddled and perplexed the world’s leading super-scientists. Could a handsfree communications device really be feasible? Was such a thing really possible without making you look like a big business jerk? It wasn’t until an entirely new superpower was discovered that the solution became clear. In 1984 Jaquan “JT” Thomas became the first recorded superhuman with the ability the OPG has dubbed “telephonesis.” As the OPG describes it “Telephonesis: The power to quite-literally have a telephone in your head. Telephonetiks can send or receive calls, place people on hold, and even record messages all from the phone in their head. Combat potential: Ah jeez I don’t know, you know not all these powers need to be used to fight people right? Maybe we should put more boxes on these forms. Prank calls are pretty aggressive right? You could definitely prank call people with this power.” That’s right folks, handsfree communications was possible. Sure, Thomas declined to let scientists poke around in his head to discover how but sometimes just knowing something is possible is enough to light a fire under those super-scientists. Within like five-seven years they’d done it. Communicators you didn’t have to touch or hold or anything! They could go right in your ear and you could be in constant contact with your support-squad, mission control, your teammates, even other heroes if you guys linked up your comms. 

From then on communicators came in all shapes and sizes. Some heroes chose to model them after their logos. Some had them woven or wired into their masks or helmets or some other part of their costumes. Someone even got functional wrist-communicators out there. Certain teams chose to forego physical communicators entirely in favor of having their telepath link everyone’s minds psychically. This type of communication requires a deep bond and a large amount of trust between members of the team (and a telepath) but it can be one of the most effective forms of communication between team members. 

If you can’t communicate in the field you’re far more likely to make mistakes. One person can’t be expected to be able to take stock of everything, especially in the heat of a battle. So being able to talk to or just listen to other people around you or the folks watching your six from back home can greatly reduce the risks inherent in fighting living swarms and brightly-clad-extremely-loud reverse ninjas. So get walking, get talking, and open up those lines of communications!

[usedcarexpertguide]

On initial impressions it might seem like the only real distinction in between cacao and cocoa is the spelling. There’s a bit more to it than that …

What is cacao?

Cacao can refer to any of the food stemmed from cacao beans– the seeds or nuts of the cacao tree. These consist of cacao nibs, cacao butter, cacao mass or paste and (most likely the most typical) cacao powder

Cacao v cocoa powder.

Raw cacao powder is made by cold-pressing unroasted cocoa beans. The process keeps the living enzymes in the cocoa and eliminates the fat (cacao butter).

Cocoa looks the very same however it’s not. Cocoa powder is raw cacao that’s been roasted at heats. Sadly, roasting changes the molecular structure of the cocoa bean, decreasing the enzyme material and reducing the general dietary value.

The research studies that take pride in chocolate’s fantastic health advantages are most likely not referring to your typical store-bought chocolate bar (damn deceptive scientists). The chocolate that they’re describing has properties closer to raw cacao.

What are the health advantages of cacao?

Cacao powder is understood to have a higher antioxidant material than cocoa and has actually been linked to a variety of advantages. (Note: Many scientific studies, like those below, describe the superior health benefits of “cocoa”. Many of these use isolated and cleansed substances from cocoa. These substances do not resemble sweet supermarket cocoa and are really just like raw cacao in form.).

These research studies have actually shown that the compounds:.

Lower insulin resistance. Secure your nerve system: Cacao is high in resveratrol, a potent antioxidant likewise discovered in red wine, understood for its capability to cross your blood-brain barrier to assist protect your nervous system. Shield nerve cells from damage. Cut your danger of stroke. Lower blood pressure. Minimize your danger of heart disease: The anti-oxidants discovered in cacao assistance to preserve healthy levels of nitric oxide (NO) in the body. NO has heart-benefiting qualities, such as unwinding blood vessels and decreasing blood pressure, it also produces contaminants. The antioxidants in cacao reduce the effects of these toxins, protecting your heart and preventing disease. Guard against toxic substances: As a powerful anti-oxidant, cacao can fix the damage triggered by totally free radicals and might decrease the threat of certain cancers. In fact, cacao includes much more antioxidants per 100g than acai, goji berries, and blueberries. Antioxidants are responsible for 10 per cent of the weight of raw cacao. Boost your state of mind: Cacao can increase levels of particular neurotransmitters that promote a sense of well-being. And the very same brain chemical that is launched when we experience deep sensations of love– phenylethylamine– is discovered in chocolate. Supply minerals: Magnesium, iron, potassium, calcium, manganese, zinc and copper. If cacao is more useful than cocoa since it’s raw, exactly what occurs when we prepare it?

Great question and we’re delighted you asked. There is no existing research on whether eating raw cacao destroys its antioxidant level, making it more comparable to its heated and processed cousin cocoa. BUT, we figure beginning with the item in its raw form, has to be more useful than beginning with a currently warmed and processed comparable.

Let’s end with an intriguing tidbit.

Research study shows that dairy hinders the absorption of antioxidants from raw cacao.

If you’re making a cacao shake you’re much better off utilizing a non-dairy milk, such as almond or coconut, in order to reap all of the antioxidant advantages. Fact!

Another truth: Did you understand you can consume chocolate on our I Quit Sugar: 8-Week Program?

One concern I get a lot is – exactly what is a superfood? Why should I trouble consuming them? Definitely they’ve just hyped up variations of routine food. Right …?

Well, not quite … Superfoods are simply that – foods that contain significantly greater quantities of anti-oxidants, vitamins, minerals, and other health-boosting, anti-aging, disease-fighting goodies. Some are everyday entire foods that you’ll likely have actually tried before (believe broccoli, blueberries; even the humble spud). Others are more unique, grown in the jungles of Peru and chosen by Amazonian warriors (okay, possibly not).

To assist you out in your quest to conquer, or at least delve into, the incredible world of superfoods, every couple of weeks I’ll be spilling the (cacao) beans on a superfood of your choice. You’ll get the low down on what it is, why you should be eating it, and some quick and simple ways to do so (even for the non-chefs among).

TO BEGIN WITH: CACAO – THE AMAZONIAN ANTIOXIDANT KING.

Raw cacao is rather various from the common “Cocoa” the majority of us grew up with in our Afghan biscuits. Cacao (pronounced “cu-COW”) refers to the Theobroma Cacao tree from which Cocoa is derived, and is utilized when referring to unprocessed versions of the cacao bean.

Regular cocoa powder and chocolate have actually been chemically processed and roasted, which ruins a big quantity of the anti-oxidants and flavanols (the things that keep you young and healthy). A current research study recommended that between 60% and 90% of the initial anti-oxidants in cacao are lost through common “Dutch processing”. Dutch processing was originally established in the early 19th Century to decrease the bitterness, darken the colour, and produce a more mellow flavour to chocolate, however regrettably also removed a lot of the goodness.

Non-organic cocoa (and non-organic chocolate) has actually likewise been dealt with greatly with toxic pesticides and fumigation chemicals and might include genetically customized (GMO) items.

If that wasn’t enough, Oxfam estimates that over 70% of the world’s cocoa is grown by indigenous neighborhoods who are paid such a low wage that hardship is widespread. In some circumstances, kid slaves are used, forced to engage in dangerous work such as utilizing machetes and applying poisonous pesticides. Big incentive to reach for a bar of fairly traded chocolate when your next yearning hits!

Raw Organic Fairly Traded Cacao, on the other hand, has plentiful benefits, so you can add it to your diet plan without any regret, simply excellent old chocolatey deliciousness.

5 BENEFITS OF RAW ORGANIC CACAO. 1. 40 Times the Antioxidants of Blueberries.

Raw Organic Cacao has over 40 times the anti-oxidants of blueberries. ORAC ratings determine the ability of anti-oxidants to take in complimentary radicals (that come from contamination and toxins in our environment), which trigger cell and tissue damage and can lead to diseases such as cancer.

2. Highest Plant-Based Source of Iron.

On a plant-based/vegan diet plan and trying to find iron? The search is over! Cacao is the greatest plant-based source of iron understood to man, at a massive 7.3 mg per 100g. This compares with beef and lamb at 2.5 mg and spinach at 3.6 mg. Note the iron in cacao is non-heme (as is all plant-based iron), so to obtain the optimum advantages you’ll wish to combine it with some vitamin C. Think oranges, kiwifruit, superfoods like binge or Camu Camu (which have 40x more vitamin C than oranges), or try out my Choc Orange Smoothie recipe for a Jaffa-tasting throwback.

3. Filled with Magnesium for a Healthy Heart & Brain.

Raw Organic Cacao is likewise one of the highest plant-based sources of magnesium, the most lacking mineral in the Western world. Magnesium is very important for a healthy heart and assists turn glucose into energy enabling your brain to work with laser-sharp clarity and focus. The reason that you may rely on a bar of chocolate throughout an all-nighter at your desk!

4. More Calcium Than Cow’s Milk.

Raw Organic Cacao has more calcium than cow’s milk would you believe, at 160mg per 100g vs the only 125mg per 100ml of milk. Time to change out the trim latte for a number of squares of dairy free raw chocolate.

5. A Natural Mood Elevator and Anti-Depressant.

Cacao is a great source of four scientifically proven happiness chemicals – serotonin, dopamine, phenylethylamine and anandamide. These neurotransmitters are related to cosy sensations of wellness, joy, and can even ease anxiety. A natural, healthy, tasty (and legal) method to obtain your happy buzz on.

4 WAYS TO USE RAW ORGANIC CACAO. 1. Brew Up A Hot (or Cold) Chocolate MIlk.

Add 1 Tbsp of raw cacao powder to a mug, pour in 1c of warmed plant-based milk, and add 1-2 Tsp of natural organic unprocessed sweeteners such as yacon syrup, agave syrup, coconut nectar, coconut sugar, or maple syrup. Or for an incredibly simple version, try my Warming Hot Cacao Chocolate recipe.

For a cold choccie milk, include 1 Tbsp of hot water to the raw cacao powder and sweetener initially to dissolve, then include 1c of cold milk and a few ice cubes (or attempt this Chocolate Milk dish).

Keep in mind: some research studies have revealed that dairy products block the absorption of antioxidants and calcium in cacao, so conserve the cow’s milk for the calfs.

2. Whizz Into a Smoothie.

Add 1-2 Tbsp of raw cacao powder or nibs to your routine shake. Or try out our Rich Chocolate Smoothie or Choc Orange Jaffa Smoothie for an included vitamin C boost. Spray raw cacao nibs on top for crunch factor and to make it look all quite when you’re done.

3. Rip Open a Bar.

No cooking here – simply grab a bar of raw organic chocolate, break into squares, and serve with some organic nuts, dried fruit, natural tea, and a lot of love.

4. “Bake” a Raw Brownie.

Attempt your hands on our Raw Brownie, which includes cacao powder and cacao nibs, and will make sure to satiate any chocolate cravings in a second (100% regret free). It’s likewise gluten totally free, wheat free, sugar-free, dairy totally free, vegetarian, vegan and paleo, so everybody’s welcomed to the party.

TODAY’S CHALLENGE:.

Include some raw organic fair trade dairy-free cacao into your life this week. Lads, even you can do this one (see concepts # 1, # 2 and # 3).

Get your healthy chocolate on now.

Cocoa powder is raw cacao that’s been roasted at high temperatures. These substances don’t look like sugary supermarket cocoa and are really similar to raw cacao in type.).

Antioxidants are responsible for 10 per cent of the weight of raw cacao. There is no current research on whether or not eating raw cacao destroys its antioxidant level, making it more akin to its heated and processed cousin cocoa. Raw Organic Cacao has over 40 times the anti-oxidants of blueberries.

from Raw Organic Powder via Cacao Vida Cited From Honey Guard

[takebackthedream]

Land Taken From Freed Slave's Descendants for Amazon Data Center? by Richard Eskow

This is a story about property: real and imagined, legitimate and illegitimate. It’s a story about who gets to decide who can own what, and whom.

Photo Credit: Wikimedia Commons

It’s a story of reality, both physical and virtual. It’s a story that begins with humans in chains, moves through Disney’s desire to make a theme park out of our most painful history, and ends with the descendants of slaves dispossessed by a company owned by one of the richest people in the world, a company named for a river.

That river runs through the churning electrical heart of the American internet.

It’s also the story of eminent domain gone wrong. We live in a nation that seizes the property of working people while helping the wealthiest among us to carry out some of the greatest property grabs in history.

The moral of the story is this: we need to radically rethink our approach to property rights.

The Virginia Turnpike

The state considered Livinia Blackburn Johnson another human being’s property when she was born into slavery, two years before the end of the Civil War.

The Civil Rights Act of 1866 gave freed slaves like Johnson the ability to own property. In 1899, under the provisions of that law, Livinia Johnson purchased a plot of land along Carver Road in what eventually became the town of Haymarket, Virginia.

Now, the Dominion of Virginia is seizing the land Johnson purchased, in order to build an Amazon data center. Her descendants have lived in Haymarket for the last 118 years. They are required by law to sell their land to Dominion Virginia Power, which will use it to build towers that will bring power to Amazon’s facility.

The area has been threatened by the march of progress before. The Disney Corporation bought up land around Haymarket in the 1990s, in order to build a Civil War theme park, but objections put an end to their plans. At the time, author William Styron wrote in a New York Times op-ed:

I have doubts whether the technical wizardry that so entrances children and grown-ups at other Disney parks can do anything but mock a theme as momentous as slavery. To present even the most squalid sights would be to cheaply romanticize suffering.

Disney’s project was blocked, and a developer bought up the land it had purchased, building high-end homes for a subdivision he called Somerset Crossing.

Here, where stagecoaches once stopped to change horses on a turnpike established in 1812, where the railroad arrived in 1852 and warring armies passed by a few years later, its new five-bedroom McMansions are described without any apparent sense of irony as “colonial.”

The well-to-do residents there managed to block any eminent domain efforts on their property. So Amazon’s agents turned their sights to Haymarket, where Livinia Blackburn Johnson’s descendants presumably have less political pull.

Amazon Highways

A turnpike, according to Merriam-Webster, is a “road (such as an expressway) for the use of which tolls are collected.” There’s a through-line between the horse-drawn turnpikes that crisscrossed Northern Virginia in the 1800s and the more than a hundred data centers dotting its landscape today.

Virginia’s data centers carry most of the world’s internet traffic – as much as 70 percent, according to local officials. An unknown but substantial share of that traffic flows through the electronic highways in Amazon’s data centers.

Twenty years have passed since Disney’s failed bid for Haymarket. Disney’s animatronic robots and 3D simulations were state-of-the-art in 1996, when the internet was still in its infancy. Today’s web brings artificial realities into almost every home – and almost every pocket – in the form of words, images, GIFs, videos, and sound.

It takes lots of physical energy to churn all that data. Internet promoters speak of the “cloud,” as if these transactions took place in some ephemeral and immaterial dimension. But to invert the words of William Blake, data centers are a “cloud inside a fiend.” Servers need electricity to cool the space around them and keep the data engines moving.

The digital universe runs roughshod over the environment, from the toxic byproducts of chip manufacture to the destruction and disease caused by discarded equipment.

Dominion Virginia Power, which received permission from Virginia to seize the Johnson land, says each data center uses enough electricity to light 5,000 homes. To power Amazon’s data center, they’ll need to install 100-foot tall towers carrying 230,000 volts of power on the Haymarket land.

The Power and the Powerful

In these data centers, which are sometimes called server farms, the primary crop is you: your searches, clicks, likes, purchases, movements, habits, and by inference, even your thoughts.

If corporations are mining our lives through “data refineries,” Northern Virginia is its Gulf of Mexico. Computer scientist and author Jaron Lanier writes, “All the computers that crunch ‘big data’ are physically similar. They are placed in obscure sites where they can radiate heat into the environment, and they are guarded like oil fields.”

Lanier argues that individuals should receive “micropayments” for the use of their own data, but that’s not how today’s internet works. Instead, “ordinary people” get the immaterial benefits of an informal economy, while the material wealth flows to the top. As Lanier writes:

“Social media sharers can make all the noise they want, but they forfeit the real wealth and clout needed to be politically powerful. Real wealth and clout instead concentrate ever more on the shrinking island occupied by elites who run the most powerful computers.”

That “wealth and clout” fuels the political and economic processes that are dispossessing these ancestors of slaves. The need to serve Amazon’s profit-making turnpike is usurping the property rights Livinia Johnson’s descendants have enjoyed for more than a century.

Amazon itself is no respecter of community or shared property. It maintained the tax breaks that fueled its initial growth by arm-twisting politicians at the state and local level, robbing government treasuries of the funds needed to preserve and expand our public wealth.

Amazon has mistreated warehouse workers, exposing them to 100-degree temperatures and grueling working conditions. Electronic devices track their every move and force them to keep up a brisk pace or face the consequences.

Now, thanks to Virginia’s use of eminent domain, Amazon’s electronic turnpike is about to grow even bigger. How will Big Data use its new processing power?

As Nathan Newman points out in a white paper, the industry’s practices include predatory individualized pricing, invasion of privacy, the marketing of subprime mortgages, and the promotion of unethical scams.

Supreme Lordship

The way our country thinks about ownership is, in a word, strange. You do not own your own data, because you have given it away to corporations like Facebook, Amazon, Netflix and Google – sometimes referred to collectively by the acronym “FANG.”

The federal government doesn’t own the valuable drug patents whose research it paid for, because it gave them away to corporations. Most of us don’t own our homes or cars, because we have mortgaged them to fundamentally dishonest financial institutions.

All of these property rights – FANG’s ownership of your data, Big Pharma’s exclusive rights to government-financed patents, Wall Street’s ownership of mortgages and pink slips – exist because we as a nation choose to enforce them.

The term “eminent domain” comes from the Latin phrase dominium eminens, which means “supreme lordship.” Sometimes homes must be taken through eminent domain in order to serve the public interest, for dams to protect the land and provide electricity, or for new roadways to open a city.

But eminent domain is also used to benefit corporations like Amazon. The rationale is that communities need economic development just as much as they need highways and waterways, because it brings jobs and economic growth.

But in times of extreme economic inequality like these, most of the wealth from development goes to the already wealthy.

Whose Domain?

The fact that Amazon’s Haymarket story has received so little attention is a measure of our stunted political vision and bleak moral landscape. Apparently our politicians and pundits find it unremarkable that homes passed down from a freed slave can be seized to help a corporation the government created and nurtured.

Yet, the same politicians and pundits would be horrified if we thought differently about eminent domain – or for that matter, the government’s ability to seize assets when the owner is suspected of committing a crime – and chose to use them to correct corporate injustices and right longstanding wrongs.

Attorney General Jefferson B. Sessions III recently reinstated a much-abused policy that allows law enforcement officials to conduct civil asset forfeitures and take the property of individuals they suspect of breaking the law, even if those individuals are never charged with or convicted of any crime.

Civil asset forfeiture can be used against companies as well as individuals. What if civil asset forfeiture was used to seize the assets of corporations that have been proven to break the law, not once, but over and over? The list includes all the country’s biggest banks, as well as corporations like General Electric.

The list also includes Amazon, which has reportedly broken both antitrust and employment laws in the U.S. It has also allegedly violated European Community and German laws. Yet instead of seizing its assets, the assets of others are being seized to maximize its profits. Not that Amazon needs any help. For a brief moment this week, Jeff Bezos was the richest man in the world. He probably will be again.

Rethinking Property

British elites were shocked and horrified when Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn proposed taking over unused luxury apartments in London to house some of the people made homeless by the Grenfell Tower fire. But the public understood.

A national poll showed that 59 percent of British adults agreed with Corbyn. City officials, reading the public’s mood, quickly took Corbyn’s suggestion.

There is compelling evidence that pharmaceutical corporations knowingly and criminally encouraged the spread of opioid addiction in this country. Why shouldn’t their executives’ country homes be used to provide drug treatment to addicts?

If there is unused investment property in this country – at, for example, One Central Park West – why shouldn’t it be used to help people recover from the ravages of opioids?

It’s clearly time to take back some of the Big Pharma’s patents. Patents are a form of government protection that they have abused, letting people die so they can maximize their profits. It’s time to take those patents away, especially since so many of them were developed at government expense.

It’s time to ask ourselves what kind of country takes property purchased by a freed slave to enrich a corporation, especially one like Amazon, which grew by exploiting a government invention – the internet – and a government loophole – tax-free online sales.

The people gave FANG its enormous wealth and power; it now has the ability to make or break careers and companies. These corporations should be regulated like public utilities.

Data should serve the people. And the Dominion of Virginia should leave the descendants of Livinia Johnson alone. The community she created should be allowed to live in peace, while we all work to strengthen our sense of the nation as a community, where property rights are valued, but where human beings are valued even more.

Cross-posted from Alternet

[isakthedragon]

A Dragon Sized Adventure Chapter 33

Chapter 33: Putting the Genie in the Lamp

*Crash and our heroes enter the Arabian Terrarium which isn't as desert-like as the Egypt one. This terrarium seems to be in an Arabian city. The buildings and walkways are made of yellow sandstone. Pools and little rivers of water run in the streets. An Arabian palace is in the far end of the Terrarium.*

Crunch: "Hey, do you mind if I take this world, little bro?"

Crash: "Go ahead, Crunch!"

Crunch: "Great! I think I might have an advantage here..." *He holds his futuristic arm.*

*Once again, you need to find a key in each level to move on to the next since Tropy has locked some gates barring entry deeper into the terrarium.*

-----

Level 36: The Arabian Streets

Crates: 175

Time Trial

Sapphire: 1:25.00

Gold: 1:20.00

Platinum: 1:15.00

Tignies to Save: 5

Helping Partner: Bentley

Badniks: Arabian Lab Assistant Pawns: They come in 2 flavors. One of them looks like Jafar and moves around, attacks with its scimitar. The other, which dresses like Aladdin, stands and throws its scimitar at you. Genie Lab Assistant Pawn: It dresses like Genie, flying around on a Magic Carpet. Monkurn: A large monkey badnik that dresses like Abu that carries pots around.

Mutants: Tignie: A ordinary Lamp... wait, hang on. *Rubs lamp to reveal a Tiger + Genie hybrid* Aha! It would be quite a surprise to see this come out of the lamp, which is probably why Cortex made this mutant. Please note that freeing it from Cortex will not grant you a wish... although it does let you easily jack it and use it to fly.

Welcome to the Arabian Era! You start off in the desert just out of town, so make your way into the city. This level is a walk through the maze of a city. At least the awning keep you cool in the midday sun. Try to avoid getting heatstroke by going in the pools that are about as well. At least, if you are feeling a little destructive, you can break the various pots around for Wumpa fruit. The level ends just outside the palace gates. 

Achievement Unlocked: Feeling Hot, Hot, Hot!

-----

Level 37: Cave of Blunders

Tropy appears. "Oh, no. You aren't entering my palace that easily. Go away, like the pauper and thieves you are!"

Crates: 156

Time Trial

Sapphire: 2:05.00

Gold: 2:00.00

Platinum: 1:55.00

Tignies to Save: 5

Helping Partner: Knuckles

Badniks: Gen-Ice: A strange pink genie that throws ice balls at you. Sol: Burn, baby, burn! Like a disco inferno!

Tropy has sent you far away from the palace in an attempt to slow you down. You are in some kind of cave... although I can't say if that is wonderful. :P In any case, you need to get out of here. Be careful of what you touch in here, since this place has booby trapped treasure all around. Most will bring up spikes or rocks will fall from the ceiling. You do need to kick down some pillars to get across some gaps (or use a Tignie). Surprisingly, punching your way out is the best way out here, so unleash your destruction. The level ends in the 'mouth' of the cage. Hey aren't those tee-*Is silenced*

Achievement Unlocked: Chaos Emeralds in the Rough

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Level 38: A Desert Excursion in a Mirage

Crates: 148

Time Trial

Sapphire: 1:40.00

Gold: 1:35.00

Platinum: 1:30.00

Tignies to Save: 5

Helping Partner: Vector

Well, you got out of that cave and into the desert. The suns setting, so there is no risk of heat stroke now. Still, we better hurry back to the city, and that is gonna require a trek through the desert. Unfortunately, the evening sun is also creating mirages in the sand. That means that there are copies of enemies and rings and boxes everywhere. The one thing I can tell you is that any sand pits are not mirages, so avoid those. Halfway through the level, you will pass through an oasis which isn't a mirage, and in fact, has no mirages, so you are safe there. The level ends at the city walls, where a ladder is...

Achievement Unlocked: Prince Crunch

-----

Level 39: Roofs of 'ARGH!'ribah

Crates: 104

Time Trial

Sapphire: 1:45.00

Gold: 1:40.00

Platinum:1:35.00

Tignies to Save: 5

Helping Partner: Omega

You finally made it back into the city, but to not alert Jafa- I mean, Tropy, you gonna have to go across the roofs and awnings and high balconies. At least it is night time now. You will have to take control of a Tignie to be able to float across some of the streets (unless you want to brave walking on flying carpets. About 3/5 through the level, there is a death route that will take you down alleyways to the Purple gem. It will then drop you off back on the main path right near the death route. The end of this level is on the high balcony of the palace.

Achievement Unlocked: A Whole New Level! :D

-----

Level 40: Palace Pandemonium

Crates: 198

Time Trial

Sapphire: 2:45.00

Gold: 2:40.00

Platinum: 2:35.00

Tignies to Save: 5

Helping Partner: Shadow

Badniks: Princess Lab Assistant Pawn: A pawn that looks like Jasmine and she will keep you away with a flurry of kicks and spins.

You've made it into the palace now, and you have to fight your way through it. And true to being a palace, there are plenty of paths branching off and away to different rooms. Perhaps it might be a good idea to look around. You might even find the 2nd gem in the palace. Well, whatever you do, your exit is in the entrance room, just in front of the door to the basement.

Achievement Unlocked: Tropy's Hour

-----

*Once again, N. Tropy forces Crunch and Shadow to exit right in his area, which is in the palace throne room instead.*

Tropy gets up from the throne. "You took your time getting over here, I was worried you had gotten lost." *He smirks.*

Shadow: "Are you going to keep rattling on annoying jokes like this? You're worse than Sonic, and even he's annoyed!"

Tropy: "Hmph, strong words from a weakling. Too bad all I have to do is stop time and kick your asses that way."

Shadow: "You try that, see what happens."

Tropy: "With pleasure."

*He starts to bangs his trident on the ground to stop time, but at the last possible second, Shadow instantly transports behind Tropy and kicks his back. This causes Tropy to fall forward and faceplant the ground. His trident escapes his hand and slides across the floor to Crunch, who picks it up.

Crunch: "Heh, he dropped this. Guess I can control time now."

*Tropy growls and gets a fire in his eyes as he grabs Shadow and throws him at Crunch. Both are knocked back and Crunch loses his grip on the trident. Tropy hurries and grabs it. While next to each other, Shadow whispers something in Crunch's ear that Tropy misses.*

Tropy: "I am the time master, and I'm going to eliminate you!" *He tries again and bangs his trident to stop time, but this time Shadow and Crunch turn super before they are frozen. Using the Emeralds causes them to freely move within frozen time.*

Crunch: "Nice try."

Shadow: "You aren't the only one to know how to use time. I think it's time we took you down a peg." *Shadow smirks.*

*Tropy snarls and bangs his trident, unfreezing time and raising a few low platforms and instantly transports to one of them.*

Boss: Tropy

Now you've gone and done it, Tropy is angry at you. He's going to attack by firing lightning bolts and balls of ice and fire he pulls out of time at you. Although it won't hurt you, it will slow you down by knocking you back, so try to avoid them. You need to get to him and attack him any way you can. Once you do, he will transport to another side of the room and attack there. Do this 8 times to defeat Tropy for good.

Achievement Unlocked: Time and Punishment :P

*Tropy falls on the ground, defeated. A transport beam takes Tropy away as Crunch and Shadow smile at their win. The others come in from the palace door and calls them over as they found the exit. They leave the terrarium.*

Death Head's / Space Egg's Bridge

Cortex bangs his hand on the chair armrest. "Damn it!"

Eggman smiles. "Time to pay the piper, Cortex. Say it."

Cortex: "No!"

Eggman: "It was the deal of the wager."

Cortex groans and sighs. "Fine. 'Eggman' is the, ugh, smartest scientist in this universe."

Eggman grins. "There, that wasn't so hard." 

*Just then, Komodo Moe and Joe come in from the elevator.*

Komodo Joe: "Isssssss it our turn, bosssssss?"

Komodo Moe: "You can trust ussss to do ssssome damage to Crasssshhhh."

Cortex: "Ugh, just do it. I don't care."

*They are transported to the next terrarium.*

Next Time: Crash and the gang go medieval in the Middle Ages (Medieval) Terrarium.

[lodelss]

It’s Time To Talk About Solar Geoengineering

Holly Jean Buck | an excerpt adapted from After Geoengineering: Climate Tragedy, Repair, and Restoration | Verso | 2019 | 24 minutes (6,467 words)

December in California at one degree of warming: ash motes float lazily through the afternoon light as distant wildfires rage. This smoky “winter” follows a brutal autumn at one degree of warming: a wayward hurricane roared toward Ireland, while Puerto Rico’s grid, lashed by winds, remains dark. This winter, the stratospheric winds break down. The polar jet splits and warps, shoving cold air into the middle of the United States. Then, summer again: drought grips Europe, forests in Sweden are burning, the Rhine is drying up. And so on.

One degree of warming has already revealed itself to be about more than just elevated temperatures. Wild variability is the new normal. Atmospheric patterns get stuck in place, creating multiweek spells of weather that are out of place. Megafires and extreme events are also the new normal — or the new abnormal, as Jerry Brown, California’s former governor, put it. One degree is more than one unit of measurement. One degree is about the uncanny, and the unfamiliar.

If this is one degree, what will three degrees be like? Four?

At some point — maybe it will be two, or three, or four degrees of warming — people will lose hope in the capacity of current emissions-reduction measures to avert climate upheaval. On one hand, there is a personal threshold at which one loses hope: many of the climate scientists I know are there already. But there ’s also a societal threshold: a turning point, after which the collective discourse of ambition will slip into something else. A shift of narrative. Voices that say, “Let’s be realistic; we’re not going to make it.” Whatever making it means: perhaps limiting warming to 2°C, or 1.5, as the Paris Agreement urged the world to strive for. There will be a moment where “we,” in some kind of implied community, decide that something else must be tried. Where “we” say: Okay, it’s too late. We didn’t try our best, and now we are in that bad future. Then, there will be grappling for something that can be done.

Local Bookstores Amazon

This is the point where it becomes “necessary” to consider the future we didn’t want: solar geoengineering. People will talk about changing how we live, from diet to consumption to transportation; but by then, the geophysics of the system will no longer be on our side. A specter rears its head: the idea of injecting aerosols into the stratosphere to block incoming sunlight. The vision is one of shielding ourselves in a haze of intentional pollution, a security blanket that now seems safer than the alternative. This discussion, while not an absolute given, seems plausible, if not probable, from the vantage point of one degree of warming — especially given that emissions are still rising.

You may have heard something about solar geoengineering. It’s been skulking in the shadows of climate policy for a decade, and haunting science for longer than that, even though it’s still just a rough idea. But it is unlikely you imagined solar geoengineering would be a serious topic of discussion, because it sounds too crazy — change the reflectivity of the earth to send more sunlight back out into space? Indeed, it is a drastic idea.

We are fortunate to have rays of sunlight streaming through space and hitting the atmospheric borders of our planet at a “solar constant” of about 1,360 watts per square meter (W/m2) where the planet is directly facing the sun. This solar constant is our greatest resource; a foundation of life on earth. In fact, it’s not actually so constant — it was named before people were able to measure it from space. The solar constant varies during the year, day to day, even minute to minute. Nevertheless, this incoming solar energy is one of the few things in life we can count on.

Much of this sunlight does not reach the surface; about 30 percent of it gets reflected back into space. So on a clear day when the sun is at its zenith, the solar radiation might reach 1,000 W/m2. But this varies depending on where you are on the globe, on the time of day, on the reflectivity of the surface (ice, desert, forest, ocean, etc.), on the clouds, on the composition of the atmosphere, and so on. Because it’s night half the time, and because the sun is hitting most of the earth at an angle, the average solar radiation around the globe works out to about 180 W/m2 over land. Still, this 180 W/m2 is a bounty.

The point of reciting all these numbers is this: solar geoengineering amounts to an effort to change this math. That’s how a researcher might look at it, anyway.

From one perspective, it sounds like complete lunacy to intentionally mess with something as fundamental as incoming solar radiation. The sun, after all, has been worshipped by cultures around the world: countless prayers uttered to Ra, Helios, Sol, Bel, Surya, Amaterasu, and countless other solar deities throughout the ages. Today, many still celebrate holidays descended from solar worship. And that worship makes sense — without the sun, there would be nothing. Even in late capitalism, we valorize the sun: people search for living spaces with great natural light; they get suntans; they create tourist destinations with marketing based on the sun and bring entire populations to them via aircraft. Changing the way sunlight reaches us and all other life on earth is almost unimaginably drastic.

But there are ways of talking about solar geoengineering that normalize it, that make you forget the thing being discussed is sunlight itself. The most discussed method of solar geoengineering is “stratospheric aerosol injection” — that is, putting particles into the stratosphere, a layer of the atmosphere higher than planes normally fly. These particles would block some fraction of incoming sunlight, perhaps about 1 to 2 percent of it. Stratospheric aerosols would change not only the amount of light coming down, but also the type: the light would be more diffuse, scattering differently. These changes would alter the color of our skies, whitening them to a degree that may or may not be easily perceptible, depending on whether you live in an urban area. The distortion would also affect how plants and phytoplankton operate. Certainly, this type of intervention seems extreme.

And despite the extremity of the idea, it’s not straightforwardly irrational. First of all, solar radiation is already naturally variable; a single passing cloud can change the flux by 25 W/m2. What’s more, solar radiation is unnaturally variable. Global warming is caused by greenhouse gas emissions — the greenhouse gas molecules trap heat, creating an imbalance between the energy coming in and the energy going back out. Since 1750, these emissions have increased the flux another 2.29 W/m2. This disparity between incoming and outgoing energy is what scientists call “radiative forcing” — a measure of imbalance, of forced change, caused by human activity. That imbalance would actually be greater — just over 3 W/m2 — if not for the slight countervailing effect of aerosol emissions that remain close to the ground. Think about a smoggy day. The quality of the light is dimmer. Indeed, air pollution from cars, trucks, and factories on the ground already masks about a degree of warming. Total removal of aerosols — as we’re trying to accomplish, in order to improve air quality and human health — could induce heating of 0.5 to 1.1°C globally.

There will be a moment where ‘we’…say: Okay, it’s too late. We didn’t try our best, and now we are in that bad future.

So, from another perspective, because human activity is already messing with the balance of radiation through both greenhouse gas emissions (warming) and emitting particulate matter from industry and vehicles (cooling), it doesn’t sound as absurd to entertain the idea that another tweak might not be that significant — especially if the counterfactual scenario is extreme climate suffering. If you stretch your imagination, you can picture a future scenario where it could be more outrageous not to talk about this idea.

The question is, are we at the point — let’s call it “the shift” — where it is worth talking about more radical or extreme measures — such as removing carbon from the atmosphere, leaving oil in the ground, social and cultural change, radical adaptation, or even solar geoengineering?

Deciding where the shift — the moment of reckoning, the desperation point — lies is a difficult task, because for every optimist who thinks renewables will save the day, there is a pessimist noting that the storage capacity and electrical grid needed for a true renewable revolution does not even exist as a plan. For many people, it’s hard to tell how desperate to feel: we know we should be worried, but we also imagine the world might slide to safety, show up five minutes to midnight and catch the train to an okay place, with some last-minute luck. It can seem like the dissonance around what’s possible actually increases the closer we get to the crunch point; the event horizon. Some of this uncertainty is indeed grounded in the science. “Climate sensitivity” — the measurement describing how earth would respond to a doubling of greenhouse gas concentrations from preindustrial times — is still unknown. That means we don’t know precisely what impacts a given amount of greenhouse gas emissions will have.

However, basic physics dictates that this season of uncertainty is limited. The picture will become clearer as emissions continue, and as scientists tally up how much carbon is in the atmosphere. Nevertheless, examining the situation today provides useful insights that should be well known, but somehow are rarely discussed in venues other than technical scientific meetings.

At present, human activities emit about 40 gigatons (Gt) of carbon dioxide a year, or 50 Gt of “carbon dioxide equivalent,” a measure that includes other greenhouse gases like methane. (A gigaton is a billion tons.) Since the Industrial Revolution, humans have emitted about 2,200 Gt of CO2. Scientists have estimated that releasing another 1,000 Gt CO2 equivalent during this century would raise temperatures by two degrees Celsius — exceeding the target of the Paris Agreement — meaning that 1,000 Gt CO2 is, if you like, our maximum remaining budget (these are rough figures; it could be much less). Knowing that today roughly 50 Gt of carbon dioxide equivalent is emitted, it is evident that emitters are on track to squander the entire carbon budget within the next 20 years. Moreover, the rate of warming is still increasing. This means that if the rate of warming slows down yet emissions remain at today’s rate, in twenty years, two degrees of warming are essentially guaranteed.

What would it take to avoid this? To keep warming below two degrees, emissions will need to drop dramatically — and even go negative by the end of this century, according to scenarios assessed by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC). Let’s consider a typical “okay future” scenario; one that would provide for a decent chance of staying within two degrees, like the one represented last year in Science magazine by a graph of median values from 18 “good” scenarios assessed in the IPCC’s 2018 special report on 1.5°C of warming.

First, a typical “good future” scenario has emissions peaking around 2020, and then dropping dramatically. Dramatic emissions reductions are key to any scenario that limits warming.

Second, in an “okay future,” emissions go net negative around 2070. “Net negative” means that the world is sucking up more carbon than it is emitting. How is that done? While emissions can be zeroed via the mitigation measures we’re familiar with — using renewable energy instead of fossil fuels, stopping deforestation, halting the destruction of wetlands, and so on — to push emissions beyond zero and into negative territory requires a greater degree of intervention. There are two main categories of approach: biological methods, including using forests, agricultural systems, and marine environments to store carbon; and geologic methods, which typically employ industrial means to capture and store CO2 underground or in rock. Some approaches combine these, though: for instance, coupling bioenergy with carbon capture and storage.

But here, note a third point: in a “good future” scenario, carbon actually starts to be removed in the 2020s and 2030s, when emissions are still relatively high. Industrial carbon capture and storage (CCS) — the practice of capturing streams of carbon at industrial sites and injecting it into underground wells — is a crucial technique for accomplishing these levels of carbon removal. As of 2019, the world has only around twenty CCS plants in operation, a number that is almost quaint in scale. To begin removing carbon at the level required for a “good future” scenario implies scaling up the current amount of carbon stored by something like a thousandfold. By 2100, the world would be sequestering ten or fifteen gigatons of carbon dioxide equivalent. And the scale-up begins right away.

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In the graph of the “okay future” scenario, the gentle slope of declining greenhouse gases looks so neat and calm. It is a fantasy described in clean lines; in the language of numbers, the same language engineers and builders and technocrats speak. This language lends weight to the image, making it seem less fantastic. However, this scenario relies on carbon removal technology at a scale far beyond the demonstration projects being planned today. As the IPCC warned in its special report on 1.5°C, reliance on such technology is a major risk. But the same report indicated that all the pathways analyzed depended upon the removal of between 100 and 1,000 gigatons of carbon in total. In short, limiting warming to 2°C is very difficult without some use of negative emissions technologies — and 1.5°C is virtually unattainable without them.

Does this mean it is impossible to avert two degrees of warming? No. For we know plenty of practices that can be used to remove carbon. We can store it in soils, in building materials and products, in rock. After all, it’s a prevalent element upon which all life is based. It would be difficult to scale these practices under our current economic and political logic, as we’ll explore this book. But it’s technically possible to imagine a future where the excesses of the past (our present) are tucked away, cleaned up, like a stain removed.

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Geoengineering talk often focuses on one moment — the decision to “deploy,” and how or whether publics will be a part of this decision. But looking at prospective decision points muddies this notion of a discrete decision. It’s also not clear exactly who these “decision makers” are. In much of our conversation about climate action, the citizen becomes a witness to history, to decision ceremonies of the powerful. Out of view are the backstories, the tiny actions that accumulated into a formal decision. It becomes hard to imagine otherwise — that geoengineering could be carried out in conversation with civil society, much less led by us.

Right now, geoengineering doesn’t exist. Indeed, the concept is an awkward catch-all that bears little correspondence with the things it purports to describe. The UK’s Royal Society laid out the term in a 2009 report, which assessed both carbon dioxide removal and solar geoengineering, also known as solar radiation management. (For a deeper understanding of how the concept of “geoengineering” came about, Oliver Morton’s book The Planet Remade and Jack Stilgoe’s book Experiment Earth are excellent resources.) Subsequent policy and scientific research adopted the Royal Society’s framing, though it’s quite possible that in the near future, the marriage of these two approaches will dissolve: a 2019 resolution brought before the United Nations Environment Assembly to assess geoengineering failed in part because it combined such different approaches. My hope is that “geoengineering” is a word that future generations will not recognize — not because they’re living it and it’s become an ordinary background condition, but because it’s a weird artifact of the early twenty-first-century way of seeing the human relationship with the rest of nature. Instead, I want us to contemplate what comes “after geoengineering” in the sense that it extends an invitation to think toward the end goals of geoengineering. “After geoengineering” also aims to evolve the conceptual language we use to apprehend what it means to intentionally change the climate: once “geoengineering” is a retired signifier, how do we understand these practices, and what does the new language and new understanding enable?

Even though climate engineering is mostly imaginary right now, it’s a topic that’s unlikely to disappear until either mitigation is pursued in earnest or the concept of geoengineering is replaced by something better; as long as climate change worsens, the specter is always there. In fact, some of the scarier scenarios result when geoengineering isn’t implemented until the impacts of climate change are even more extreme, and is therefore conducted by governments that are starting to fray and unravel. Looking at these fictional scenarios as they unfold prompts some hard questions about the optimal timing of geoengineering. Climate policy at large has been influenced by a “wait and see” attitude, where policymakers wait and see what kinds of economic damage it will cause before taking action. Research shows that even highly educated adults believe this is a reasonable approach, possibly because their mental models don’t properly apprehend stocks and flows. Climate change is a problem of carbon stocks, not carbon flows: the earth system is like a bathtub, filling up (an analogy used by climate modeler John Sterman and educator Linda Booth Sweeney). Reducing the flow of water into the bathtub isn’t going to fix our problem unless we’re actually draining it, too: the amount of emissions can be reduced, but greenhouse gas concentrations will still be rising. Wait-and-see is actually a recipe for disaster, then, because more water is flowing into the bathtub every year. Carbon removal increases the drain. It doesn’t make sense to wait and see if it’s needed. Moreover, it is possible that our capacity to carry out carbon removal — economically, politically, and socially — could actually be greater now than it will be in a climate-stressed future.

Solar geoengineering is trickier. A wait-and-see approach makes intuitive sense: let’s wait and see if society gets emissions under control in the next couple of decades, and let’s wait and see if scientists can get better estimates of climate sensitivity and sink responses. However, there are two key limitations to note here. First, scientists anticipate that doing the research on solar geoengineering could take at least twenty years, and possibly many decades. Second, we won’t know about some of these climate tipping points until we’ve crossed them. Imagine implementing a solar geoengineering program in order to save coastal megacities from rising seas — a plausible reason a society might try something like this. It would be desirable to do the solar geoengineering before warming reached levels where the sea level rise was locked in. But that year might only be known in hindsight, given that it’s a nonlinear system. For some, this is a rationale for at least starting geoengineering research right away. A counterargument is that research is a slippery slope, and doing the research makes it more likely that solar geoengineering will be deployed.

In much of our conversation about climate action, the citizen becomes a witness to history, to decision ceremonies of the powerful.

Whatever conclusion one arrives at in this debate, the main takeaway, for me, is this: There are certainly scenarios in which global society does figure out how to cut emissions to zero, albeit with much climate suffering (in the near future as well as our current present). Yet, if one thinks it’s plausible that there won’t be a significant start on this in the next decade, and that the risks of climate change are significant, it could be reasonable to look into solar geoengineering. And naturally one would want to avoid the worst-case and go for the better-case ways of doing it. There are crucial choices to be made about how it is done. For most climate engineering techniques, what is outrageous inheres not in the technology, but in the context in which it would be deployed.

Those contexts vary, but they all have two important elements. One is the counterfactual climate change scenario: How bad is climate change turning out to be, on a scale from pretty bad to catastrophic? The second is what is being done at the time to confront climate change, whether that be carbon removal, mitigation, adaptation — or nothing. These are very different futures. If a solar geoengineering program is to be ended on a meaningful timescale, it will rely on mitigation and carbon removal. If a regime begins solar geoengineering, it needs to keep putting those particles up there year after year, until carbon emissions are brought down. Thus, the hard thing isn’t beginning the project, but ending it: ensuring that what comes after geoengineering is livable. This is a battleground that’s currently obscured in most discussions of geoengineering.

The definitive story of the twenty-first century, for people working to combat climate change, may be captured in one graph: the rise of greenhouse gas emissions. The line features a dramatic, tension-laden rise — and, ideally, a peak, followed by a dramatic and then gentle downslope, a resolution that accords a feeling of restoration and completion. From Shakespeare to the novel to the life course, the exposition–conflict–climax–resolution–moral story arc is a classic one. It maps nicely onto a temperature-overshoot scenario, where emissions are temporarily high but come back down. This story line lands us, the challenged yet triumphant protagonist, with 2°C of warming at century’s end. These established narrative forms are how we know how to locate ourselves in an overwhelming situation; how we manage to narrate the task at hand. In these imaginaries of managing an overshoot via carbon removal, we risk simply mapping our familiar narrative form onto the problem.

As philosopher Pak-Hang Wong argues, geoengineering needs to be seen “not as a one-off event but as a temporally extended process.” It’s not about the hero’s moment of action, the climax. I would add that this re-visioning of geoengineering must be directed not just into the future, but into the past as well, thereby placing climate intervention into historical context. Future processes of both solar geoengineering and carbon removal will entail dealing with compensation or insurance for people who suffer loss and damage, working out ways to protect vulnerable people, working out who pays for it — and all that requires a reckoning with history, particularly with colonial histories of land appropriation, dispossession, and exploitation. On the international level, negotiators will have to delve into the histories of uneven development, carbon debt, and, yes, colonialism. Carbon removal can be viewed in terms of debt repayment. The addition of solar geoengineering on top of carbon removal would therefore be like living with the repo man always in the sky above you, reminding you what happens if the debt isn’t paid back. Financially, we are already living in a world of debt peonage, as Marxist geographer David Harvey points out; most of the population has future claims on their labor. Now future generations are going to have a double debt. It’s not just the decision to do geoengineering that matters; it’s how this carbon debt and carbon cleanup operation is taken care of, too. The details are everything.

In reality, the resolution of this narrative curve is going to involve struggles all along the way. The latter part of the work, the last half of the curve towards completion, may be tougher than the first, because decarbonizing the electricity sector by switching to solar panels is simply easier than dealing with “hard to mitigate” sectors or deep cultural changes, like decarbonization of aviation and industrial production, or reduction of meat consumption. Deciding to start geoengineering is a bit like deciding to get married. It’s not saying the vows that is hard, but doing the work of the marriage. “Tying the knot,” in reality, doesn’t actually mean that you’re going to stay together forever, despite the metaphor. You have to keep choosing your spouse, or the marriage deteriorates. Solar geoengineering, in particular, would be more like a relationship than a ceremony: and yet much of the treatment in the literature and the press focuses on the expensive wedding. We should instead be thinking more about the world after geoengineering, because climate engineering could be a means to very different ends.

Indeed, it has been difficult for environmentalists and the left to engage with either carbon removal or solar geoengineering in a forward-thinking way. Part of this is due to a fixation on the immediate need to see emissions peak — but part of it also has to do with some serious limitations in how we think.

Copenhagen, December 2009, 1°C / 34°F

The banners unfurled under the dreary skies read “Hopenhagen.” I crossed the plaza, pigeons scattering. A historic brick building loomed above, its rooftop scaffolding bearing the logo: “i’m loving it.” On the ground floor were a Burger King and KFC. Between this fast-food sandwich hung a three-story advertisement sponsored by “corporate citizens Coca-Cola and Siemens”: two young, blonde boys, skinny and pale, with fists in the air, ready to heft a burden. “Earth’s Bodyguards,” read the caption.

I waited in the cold with hundreds of bundled-up delegates and protestors for a train to the Bella Center, where the fifteenth session of the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change’s Conference of the Parties was taking place. We glided past a glassy office building with a several-story bright-green banner. “Stop climate change. Make COP 15 matter,” it instructed us in Helvetica Light, the logo of construction corporation Skanska beneath.

At the time, climate politics seemed haunted by the specter of green capitalism. We marched under the slogan System Change Not Climate Change. While I have only a few distinct memories of this summit, they portended something quite different than our green capitalist, ecologically modernized future.

Between breaks, delegates would spill out of the conference rooms and rush to treat-laden tables in the hallways in a near melee for the best desserts. A European diplomat in a suit and a young student both reached for the last chocolate on the table, and the man in the suit slapped the confection out of the younger man’s hand.

A retinue of men, dressed in suits, swept briskly through the corridor like a cold wind. The man in the center was the focal point; the rest flanked him, like a military formation. I flattened myself into the side of the hallway as they passed. It’s an unremarkable thing, people passing each other in a nondescript corridor, but I felt chilled. “Did you see Robert Mugabe? He’s here,” someone whispered to me a few minutes later.

A tent, in the rain, in the “free city” of Christiania. I listened to Naomi Klein and other activists muster the forces. We drank mulled wine to keep warm and waited for the police to sweep in with their water cannons and tear gas; there was a rumor that they were coming. (They came.)

There was a kind of power that crackled in the air. Every time it manifested, it surprised me. I was expecting a climate summit to be a rather stuffy and formal affair, filled with acronyms and technical jargon. The injunctions of green capitalism postered around the city seemed pleading, thin, compared to these older and more primal forms of power. Hugo Chávez, speaking at the summit, said that “a ghost is stalking the streets of Copenhagen…it’s capitalism, capitalism is that ghost.” Chavez declared, “When these capitalist gods of carbon burp and belch their dangerous emissions, it’s we, the lesser mortals of the developing sphere who gasp and sink and eventually die.” I can understand the sentiment — particularly when it comes to the unevenness of climate impacts and the brutality of the historical record. As ecological Marxist theory argues, capital accumulation and the treadmill of production is a central factor in global environmental degradation — a thesis I’m onboard with. Nevertheless, I don’t think that green capitalism was the ghost roaming those halls. Perhaps we were focusing on the wrong ghost.

Those of us schooled in keeping watch against green capitalism would naturally read geoengineering as capitalism’s next move in self-preservation. I’m skeptical of this, because I don’t see the evidence that capitalism is capable of acting in its own long-term benefit — especially not consciously, on the scale and temporality of mobilization that this intervention would require. But capital is something of a headless monster, incapable of this kind of macro-level, strategic, long-term thinking. In the face of what could be an existential crisis, innovation is flowing toward hookup apps and making sure porny advertising doesn’t get stationed next to famous brands. This is where capital’s attention and money is directed; as anthropologist David Graeber observes, technological progress since the 1970s has been largely in information technologies, technologies of simulation. Graeber notes that there was a shift from “investment in technologies associated with the possibility of alternative futures to investment in technologies that furthered labor discipline and social control” — in other words, it’s a big mistake to assume capitalism is naturally technologically progressive. In fact, he suggests, “invention and true innovation will not happen within the framework of contemporary corporate capitalism — or, most likely any form of capitalism at all.” I agree — we ’ve seen numerous terrific ideas since the 1970s in alternative energy, and even in carbon removal, but they’ve been constantly thwarted or shelved. Whatever form of capitalism we’re living in now, it doesn’t seem like a system in which carbon removal is going to evolve. The derivation of capitalism we’re coping with is predatory, inelegant, and fragmented, seemingly incapable of delivering fixed-capital tools like carbon capture and storage or transformative bioenergy to extend its lifespan.

Critical theorist McKenzie Wark asks: “We think within a metaphysical construct in which capital has some eternal inner essence, and only its forms of appearance ever change…But what if the whole of capitalism had mutated into something else?” Wark speculates on the emergence of what he calls the “vectoralist” class, a new postcapitalist ruling class that owns and controls the means of producing information: the vectors. This is actually worse than capitalism, Wark argues, because the information vector can render everything on the planet a resource.

If a regime begins solar geoengineering, it needs to keep putting those particles up there year after year, until carbon emissions are brought down. Thus, the hard thing isn’t beginning the project, but ending it.

So what does all this mean for geoengineering? If capitalism is focused on vectoral control and ineffective when it comes to ensuring the material conditions of its own existence, solar geoengineering would be done by states or not at all. As for carbon removal, the question is this: If zombified neoliberal capitalism isn’t going to build up CCS and carbon removal in order to save itself from planetary crisis, who’s going to do it?

We, the workers and voters, will have to decide to force the removal of carbon from the atmosphere. And we should — those of us living in the global North, in particular. A whole host of commonly accepted moral principles align with carbon removal: “clean up your own mess,” “the polluter pays,” the “precautionary principle,” and others. Moreover, doing carbon removal in a socially just and environmentally rigorous manner is not just morally desirable — it is actually a precondition for emissions going net negative.

There are basically two levels to carbon removal, as I see it. Level 1 involves niche, boutique, aesthetic, or symbolic removals. This is the biochar at your farmer’s market, the wool beanie grown with regeneratively grazed sheep, the shoes made with recycled carbon, water carbonated by Coca-Cola with carbon captured directly from the air. It is cool. Advocates see it as the first step toward reaching Level 2. You don’t want to knock its fragile emergence, because it’s important for generating momentum and raising awareness of carbon removal. But it’s geophysically impossible that it will “solve” climate change.

Level 2 is the gigaton-scale removals that could actually lower greenhouse gas concentrations. Call it “climate significant.” It’s waste cleanup; pollution disposal.

How does one get from Level 1 to Level 2? Some people think it will naturally happen, just as cleantech — renewable energy — “naturally” becomes cheaper and scales. But unlike cleantech, Level 2 is a cleanup operation; in general, these scales of storage and disposal don’t generate usable products. I asked Noah Deich, executive director of the nonprofit Carbon180, about these middle-range pathways from demonstration to disposal scales, because his organization has done significant work articulating policy proposals for carbon removal. In the near term, Deich sees a threefold approach, or a “stool with three legs.” One is moonshot research and development across the technology and land sectors. The second is supporting entrepreneurs to bring promising ideas to market. Lastly, he notes, “we need to change policy so that there’s sufficient funding for the research and development, but there are also large-scale markets, so that those entrepreneurs and those land managers can access those markets at a meaningful scale.” The near-term actions he identifies include engagement of universities in research and development, starting up an incubator for carbon tech, and policy work such as implementation of tax credits for CCS and the inclusion of carbon farming in the US farm bill.

When I remarked that the middle time frame seemed fuzzy, Deich replied, “The middle part will remain fuzzy, because I think it’s iterative.” You get started with technology in existing markets, which creates jobs and investment opportunities, he says. Success begets policy support, whether it be government or corporate, which begets more markets, and it becomes a reinforcing cycle that snowballs. “If we’re able to create incentives for taking that carbon out of the air, I think it’s reasonable that we’ll be able to ratchet up those incentives and build that broad political coalition that’s both durable and meaningful to do this at large scale.”

Yet I am less and less convinced that there is a clear route from Level 1 to Level 2, nor that the first would naturally progress to the next. Level 1 is what our current set of policies and incentives can accomplish, with a lot of work from think tanks, NGOs, philanthropists, and the like. Level 2 requires a massive transformation: economic, political, cultural. It implies that we decide to treat carbon dioxide as a waste product and dedicate a significant portion of GDP to cleaning it up, at the least. It would require profound state regulation — the same sort that’s needed for strong mitigation, and then some.

There is sometimes a hope among environmentalists and social justice advocates that confronting climate change will itself bring about social transformation — that it will flip us into a new narrative that could take on the climate pollution challenge. As cultural theorist Claire Colebrook writes,

From Naomi Klein’s claim that climate change is the opportunity finally to triumph over capitalism, to the environmental humanities movement that spurns decades of “textualist” theory in order to regain nature and life, to wise geo-engineers who operate from the imperative that if we are to survive we must act immediately and unilaterally, the end of man has generated a thousand tiny industries of new dawns.

However, I think there are plenty of scenarios where we deal with climate change in a middling way that preserves the existing unequal arrangements, leaving us not with a new dawn, but with a long and torturous afternoon. Replacing our current liquid fuels with synthetic, lower-carbon fuels produced with direct air capture and enhanced oil recovery would be one version. But those dawnless scenarios are not necessarily geoengineering scenarios, and vice versa. There are both horrifying and mildly likeable scenarios for how carbon removal might be accomplished. The horrifying ones are easy to conjure to mind, while the likable ones stretch the imagination. It would be easy to tag best-case carbon removal scenarios as utopias — even though they would actually be worlds that have failed to mitigate in time, representing at best a muddling through. That’s where we’re at: even muddling through looks like an amazing social feat, an orchestration so elaborate and requiring so much luck that people may find it a fantastic, utopian dream.

We can maximize our chances of muddling through by engaging proactively with both carbon removal and solar geoengineering. However, binary thinking about climate engineering has made it difficult for progressives to create a dialogue about how engaging with these emerging approaches might be done. Climate engineering has been stuck in the realm of “technology,” rather than understood as a variety of practices that include people in various relationships with nature and each other. To free ourselves of these binaries and imagine a different kind of strategy-led engagement, it’s valuable to articulate a best-case scenario for how these practices could unfold.

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There’s an abyss in contemporary thinking about the role of industrial technology in coping with climate change.

On one side of this abyss are people who appraise the potential of technology optimistically, but fail to articulate any real historical awareness of how technology has developed in and through contexts that are often exploitative, unequal, and even violent.

On the other side of the abyss are thinkers who, on the contrary, have a deep understanding of colonialism, imperialism, and the historical evolution of capitalism, but dismiss technology as a useful part of responding to climate change.

This cleavage leaves little room for critical discussion of how technologies might be used to further climate justice. It makes it impossible to imagine, for example, democratically controlled industrial technology that doesn’t exist to “conquer” nature. Today, most left thinking has abandoned the “streak of admiration for the productive forces as the instruments of a conquest of nature that will ultimately usher in communist affluence for everyone,” as human ecologist Andreas Malm has observed. But this abandonment did not immediately lead to a coherent articulation of a view of technology that is collective or cooperative, or that works with nature.

I am not the first to observe this. A number of calls have emerged recently for the left to think differently about industrial technology. Geographer Matthew Huber, for one, suggests that “Marx believed that there is something inherently emancipatory about large-scale industrialization, and ecosocialists need not be so quick to dismiss this possibility.” He asks, “What if the phrase ‘development of the productive forces’ was not simply equated with the expansion of dirty industrial production based on coal, oil, and gas and instead represented the full development of industrial energy systems based on cleaner and renewable fuels?” Sociologist Jesse Goldstein, in Planetary Improvement, his critical ethnographic analysis of cleantech, observes that “the sociotechnical capacity is out there to transform the world in any number of ways,” but realizing emancipatory visions will require “killing the investor” in our minds, “thereby liberating our imaginations, our sciences, and our technologies from the narrowing logic of capital.”

These overlapping binaries — geoengineering versus real change — obscure the reality that there is a spectrum of ways of doing, enacting, practicing, deploying, or implementing climate intervention. The implementation does not inhere in the technology. Sticking rigidly to these binaries keeps us from seeing possible futures: it gives the terrain for shaping climate engineering over to the few.

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From After Geoengineering, by Holly Jean Buck, recently published by Verso.

Holly Jean Buck writes on emerging technologies in the Anthropocene, with work appearing in journals like Development and Change, Climatic Change, Annals of the American Association of Geographers and Hypatia. Since 2009, she has been researching the social dimensions of geoengineering, including as a faculty fellow with the Forum for Climate Engineering Assessment in Washington, DC, as a member of the Steering Committee for the international Climate Engineering Conference in Berlin, and as a doctoral researcher at Cornell University, from which she holds a PhD in development sociology.

Longreads Editor: Dana Snitzky

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[usedcarexpertguide]

On initial impressions it may look like the only real difference between cacao and cocoa is the spelling. There’s a little bit more to it than that …

What is cacao?

Cacao can refer to any of the foodstuff derived from cacao beans– the seeds or nuts of the cacao tree. These include cacao nibs, cacao butter, cacao mass or paste and (probably the most typical) cacao powder

Cacao v cocoa powder.

Raw cacao powder is made by cold-pressing unroasted cocoa beans. The process keeps the living enzymes in the cocoa and eliminates the fat (cacao butter).

Cocoa looks the same but it’s not. Cocoa powder is raw cacao that’s been roasted at heats. Regretfully, roasting modifications the molecular structure of the cocoa bean, lowering the enzyme content and lowering the total nutritional worth.

The studies that possess chocolate’s incredible health benefits are likely not referring to your average store-bought chocolate bar (damn deceptive scientists). The chocolate that they’re referring to has residential or commercial properties closer to raw cacao.

What are the health advantages of cacao?

Cacao powder is known to have a higher antioxidant content than cocoa and has been linked to a range of advantages. These compounds don’t resemble sugary supermarket cocoa and are really comparable to raw cacao in kind.).

These studies have actually revealed that the substances:.

Lower insulin resistance. Safeguard your nervous system: Cacao is high in resveratrol, a potent anti-oxidant likewise found in red wine, known for its capability to cross your blood-brain barrier to assist secure your nervous system. Guard afferent neuron from damage. Cut your danger of stroke. Lower blood pressure. Lower your danger of heart disease: The anti-oxidants found in cacao aid to preserve healthy levels of nitric oxide (NO) in the body. NO has heart-benefiting qualities, such as relaxing blood vessels and lowering blood pressure, it likewise produces contaminants. The anti-oxidants in cacao reduce the effects of these toxic substances, securing your heart and avoiding illness. Guard against contaminants: As a potent anti-oxidant, cacao can fix the damage caused by free radicals and might minimize the threat of certain cancers. Cacao contains far more antioxidants per 100g than acai, goji berries, and blueberries. Anti-oxidants are accountable for 10 per cent of the weight of raw cacao. Boost your mood: Cacao can increase levels of specific neurotransmitters that promote a sense of well-being. When we experience deep feelings of love– phenylethylamine– is found in chocolate, and the very same brain chemical that is released. Supply minerals: Magnesium, iron, potassium, calcium, copper, zinc and manganese. If cacao is more helpful than cocoa because it’s raw, exactly what happens when we prepare it?

Excellent question and we’re happy you asked. There is no present research on whether consuming raw cacao damages its antioxidant level, making it more akin to its heated and processed cousin cocoa. We figure starting off with the product in its raw kind, has to be more helpful than beginning with an already heated up and processed equivalent.

Let’s end with an intriguing tidbit.

Research reveals that dairy inhibits the absorption of antioxidants from raw cacao.

If you’re making a cacao shake you’re better off utilizing a non-dairy milk, such as almond or coconut, in order to enjoy all of the antioxidant benefits. Fact!

Another fact: Did you understand you can eat chocolate on our I Quit Sugar: 8-Week Program?

One concern I get a lot is – what is a superfood? Undoubtedly they’ve simply hyped up versions of regular food.

Well, not quite … Superfoods are simply that – foods which contain substantially higher quantities of antioxidants, vitamins, minerals, and other health-boosting, anti-aging, disease-fighting goodies. Some are everyday whole foods that you’ll likely have tried before (believe broccoli, blueberries; even the modest spud). Others are more unique, grown in the rainforests of Peru and selected by Amazonian warriors (alright, possibly not quite).

To assist you out in your mission to dominate, or a minimum of explore, the amazing world of superfoods, every couple of weeks I’ll be spilling the (cacao) beans on a superfood of your choice. You’ll get the low down on what it is, why you should be consuming it, and some simple and fast ways to do so (even for the non-chefs amongst).

UP: CACAO – THE AMAZONIAN ANTIOXIDANT KING.

Raw cacao is rather different from the common “Cocoa” most of us grew up with in our Afghan biscuits. Cacao (noticable “cu-COW”) refers to the Theobroma Cacao tree from which Cocoa is derived, and is used when referring to unprocessed variations of the cacao bean.

Typical cocoa powder and chocolate have actually been chemically processed and roasted, which damages a large quantity of the antioxidants and flavanols (the important things that keep you young and healthy). A current study recommended that between 60% and 90% of the original antioxidants in cacao are lost through typical “Dutch processing”. Dutch processing was originally developed in the early 19th Century to minimize the bitterness, darken the colour, and develop a more mellow flavour to chocolate, but sadly likewise got rid of a lot of the goodness.

Non-organic cocoa (and non-organic chocolate) has likewise been treated heavily with poisonous pesticides and fumigation chemicals and may contain genetically customized (GMO) items.

If that wasn’t enough, Oxfam approximates that over 70% of the world’s cocoa is grown by native communities who are paid such a low wage that poverty is extensive. In some instances, kid servants are utilized, forced to engage in harmful work such as utilizing machetes and applying hazardous pesticides. Big reward to reach for a bar of fairly traded chocolate when your next yearning hits!

Raw Organic Fairly Traded Cacao, in contrast, has abundant advantages, so you can add it to your diet with no guilt, just good old chocolatey deliciousness.

5 BENEFITS OF RAW ORGANIC CACAO. 1. 40 Times the Antioxidants of Blueberries.

Raw Organic Cacao has over 40 times the anti-oxidants of blueberries. ORAC scores determine the ability of antioxidants to take in free radicals (that come from contamination and toxins in our environment), which cause cell and tissue damage and can lead to illness such as cancer.

2. Highest Plant-Based Source of Iron.

On a plant-based/vegan diet and looking for iron? The search is over! Cacao is the highest plant-based source of iron understood to man, at a tremendous 7.3 mg per 100g. This compares to beef and lamb at 2.5 mg and spinach at 3.6 mg. Note the iron in cacao is non-heme (as is all plant-based iron), so to get the optimum benefits you’ll wish to integrate it with some vitamin C. Think oranges, kiwifruit, superfoods like binge or Camu Camu (which have 40x more vitamin C than oranges), or experiment with my Choc Orange Smoothie recipe for a Jaffa-tasting throwback.

3. Full of Magnesium for a Healthy Heart & Brain.

Raw Organic Cacao is also among the highest plant-based sources of magnesium, the most deficient mineral in the Western world. Magnesium is necessary for a healthy heart and helps turn glucose into energy allowing your brain to deal with laser-sharp clarity and focus. The reason why you might turn to a bar of chocolate throughout an all-nighter at your desk!

4. More Calcium Than Cow’s Milk.

Raw Organic Cacao has more calcium than cow’s milk would you think, at 160mg per 100g vs the only 125mg per 100ml of milk. Time to switch out the trim latte for a number of squares of dairy free raw chocolate.

5. A Natural Mood Elevator and Anti-Depressant.

Cacao is a great source of four scientifically proven bliss chemicals – serotonin, phenylethylamine, anandamide and dopamine. These neurotransmitters are related to cosy feelings of wellness, joy, and can even relieve depression. A natural, healthy, delicious (and legal) method to obtain your happy buzz on.

4 WAYS TO USE RAW ORGANIC CACAO. 1. Brew Up A Hot (or Cold) Chocolate MIlk.

Add 1 Tbsp of raw cacao powder to a mug, gather 1c of warmed plant-based milk, and add 1-2 Tsp of natural organic unprocessed sweeteners such as yacon syrup, agave syrup, coconut nectar, coconut sugar, or maple syrup. Or for a super simple variation, try my Warming Hot Cacao Chocolate recipe.

For a cold choccie milk, add 1 Tbsp of hot water to the raw cacao powder and sweetener initially to dissolve, then include 1c of cold milk and a few ice cubes (or attempt this Chocolate Milk dish).

Note: some studies have shown that dairy items block the absorption of antioxidants and calcium in cacao, so save the cow’s milk for the calfs.

2. Whizz Into a Smoothie.

Add 1-2 Tbsp of raw cacao powder or nibs to your routine smoothie. Or try our Rich Chocolate Smoothie or Choc Orange Jaffa Smoothie for an added vitamin C boost. When you’re done, spray raw cacao nibs on top for crunch element and to make it look all quite.

3. Rip Open a Bar.

No cooking here – simply grab a bar of raw natural chocolate, burglarize squares, and serve with some natural nuts, dried fruit, natural tea, and a whole lot of love.

4. “Bake” a Raw Brownie.

Attempt your hands on our Raw Brownie, that includes cacao powder and cacao nibs, and will be sure to quench any chocolate cravings in a 2nd (100% regret totally free). It’s also gluten totally free, wheat complimentary, sugar-free, dairy complimentary, vegetarian, vegan and paleo, so everybody’s invited to the celebration.

TODAY’S CHALLENGE:.

Add some raw organic fair trade dairy-free cacao into your life today. Lads, even you can do this one (see ideas # 1, # 2 and # 3).

Get your healthy chocolate on now.

Cocoa powder is raw cacao that’s been roasted at high temperature levels. These compounds do not resemble sweet grocery store cocoa and are really similar to raw cacao in kind.).

Antioxidants are accountable for 10 per cent of the weight of raw cacao. There is no existing research on whether or not eating raw cacao ruins its antioxidant level, making it more akin to its heated and processed cousin cocoa. Raw Organic Cacao has over 40 times the antioxidants of blueberries.

from Raw Organic Powder via Cacao Vida Cited From Honey Guard