#the funny thing is that i did actually feel myself starting to fall out of the interest back in early 2018

[palmtreepalmtree]

Alright, everyone. This probably will not be a long one because... oof... but without further ado, this is...

THE WORST MOVIE ON NETFLIX RIGHT NOW

Today, I am pleased to present A Family Affair, starring Nicole Kidman, Zac Efron, and Joey King.

The premise for this very questionable movie is that Zara (King) is a personal assistant to the man-child movie star, Chris (Efron), and is horrified when her widowed mother, Brooke (Kidman) starts sleeping with him.

There's so much that's wrong with this movie, it's hard to figure out where to begin. I've watched it twice now to try to put my finger on the problem. The biggest issue here is that none of this feels particularly real -- definitely not King's acting, Efron's character, and least of all Kidman's wig.

ARITHMETIC

Even after watching this movie twice, I found myself spending way too much time trying to do some mental math in the middle to make everyone's ages make sense. Especially when they threw in Kathy Bates as Kidman's mother-in-law. Like... I think it works???

But it's fucking distracting.

The movie never meaningfully addresses the age gap between Kidman and Efron. On the one hand, sure. They wouldn't touch it if the genders were reversed. But that also feels disingenuous since Efron's character is hounded by paparazzi. You're telling me this schmuck who obsesses about his brand as an actor never has a single moment of insecurity about dating an older woman!?!?!? PLEASE.

FAKE FANTASY

It feels at times like this movie is a fantasy every which way you look at it, except for in the way that matters. As a viewer, I want to get swept up in the fantasy -- what if I had a meet-cute with a movie star!? What if I was a published novelist, with beachfront property in Malibu, and an entire closet of couture dresses that Vogue sent me and that could fit me?! What if I could afford a luxury SUV on an assistant's salary?!? What if Big Bear actually looked like that in the snow!?

The thing is, all of this falls so flat, you can't get lost in it as a viewer. And it's not funny or charming enough to keep you interested in the story or get you invested in the relationships.

HATEABLE

I regret to inform you there's not a single likeable character in this movie. The Zac Efron movie star feels like it was written from the whispers of disgruntled assistants. It's just TOO AWFUL. And while at times it can be funny, it's hard to believe that Nicole's character could ever fall for him.

Look, I don't know if you know this, but movie stars, especially ones who mostly get by on looks, are VERY CHARMING. This is part of how they get cast. But in this movie, we never see this motherfucker be charming. Not even once.

Joey's character is probably right for objecting so hard to this relationship, but she spends so much of the movie just screaming about things, it's really fucking hard to be rooting for her. Also, she's obviously a rich kid. Like MALIBU RICH.

And Nicole... like... I have so many questions... like... look I hate that this is where we're at with things, but there's something uncanny valley about her face and her hair through the whole movie. It's kinda hard to watch her or feel anything for her. That must be a wig. It must be. And it's just so awful the whole time. This is such a far-cry from how she looked in Big Little Lies. WHAT HAPPENED.

THE IDEA OF YOU PROBLEM

Look, the biggest issue here is that this movie gets wrong all of the things that The Idea of You got right. Where A Family Affair ignores the age gap, The Idea of You wrestles with it as a central part of its plot. While A Family Affair dresses Nicole in horribly unattractive clothes, The Idea of You puts Anne Hathaway in a stunning, sexy wardrobe.

WHO DID THIS TO YOU NICOLE!?!?

While both films present fantasy lives for their leading ladies (a novelist and an art gallery owner), The Idea of You seems somehow more real and thus attainable as fantasy (a craftsman house in Silverlake as opposed to a beachfront mansion in Malibu). While A Family Affair alludes to sex and romance, it doesn't have even a hint of the sex appeal and romance of The Idea of You. It's never even clear what Nicole's character sees in Zac's, beyond his body, even once the relationship has begun to carry on and clearly affect her emotionally.

In many ways, these films are mirrors of each other. Neither of these are perfect movies, and they share a lot of similar story beats and themes: the relationships, including mother-daughter, fame and celebrity, solo female success, betrayal of the spouse, and so on and so forth.

But A Family Affair is basically the funhouse mirror version of the story. It may make you giggle a couple times, but you're not going to stand there taking it in for very long. Best to just move on and forget you ever saw it.

[notagaybastard]

I think I am finally In love

[flingza-roller]

do u have any tips for like. staying interested in things. sounds like a peculiar enough ask but ur bio says you’ve been into splatoon for 5 yrs and i heavily dislike the cycle i have of being obsessed w smth and then forgetting abt it in a couple months time. so would u have any advice perchance?? sorry for the long ask 🫶

OH MAN okay so splatoon is actually pretty weird in this regard bc my entire life ive had the same deal with cycling thru hyperfixatioms and each one only lasting like a few months, maybe a year at most. but boy i think might as well classify splatoon as a special interest cuz its solidified in my personality GDSJD

okay so, tips! i find it easier to stay interested in something if the people im around are also into it, so ive got a lotta splatoon friends/discord servers n shit (and a partner whos also brainrotting lol). its also good to stay engaged with the community (im pretty much just on tumblr cuz twitter sucks ass), i used to go to in-person meetups n stuff too! being surrounded by passion for that particular interest helps me stay passionate too.

oh and if ur an artist, the biggest thing: having characters ur really attached to (and project onto,,,) helps a lot bc its hard to fall out of an interest when ur in too deep with drawing the blorbos all the time. also making ocs and aus helps a lot with staying involved, making new content means it wont feel stale (im constantly making new stuff in my head for sploon, its what kept me fixated thru the quiet period between 2 and 3)

i actually havent even played splatoon 3 in weeks but im still very much fixated on the franchise bc my head. is so full of squids. hopefully some of this stuff helps and i wish u the best anon!! :]

[chuluoyi]

✎ attraction

- gojo satoru x reader

to think it started with your crush on his best friend...

genre: high school!gojo being a menace, jealous!gojo but he doesn’t realize it? enemies to lovers, fluff, gojo begins pining on you

note: thank you anon who asks for gojo falling in love with a first year! i added some spice though haha

a part of gojo's love entries

general masterlist

Back in 2006—

There was this tiny weeny part of Gojo that was like... questioning, how did his best friend Geto Suguru catch your eye, whereas he didn’t? Like, at all?

"I want Geto."

"Hah?" Gojo arched a righteous brow, swiftly turning your way—feeling the stings of irritation gnawing at him. "What?"

You shot him a look. “I said, you suck and I’m lamenting that I’m paired with you instead of Geto for this mission.”

Once upon a time, you did hate him for obvious reasons as other people do. He was obnoxious, boastful and overall grating on your nerves.

Well, actually, “hate” would be too strong of a word, so probably “dislike greatly” it is.

“Ehh, Suguru? With you?” Gojo glanced at you, purposefully scrunching his face into a mocking sneer. “No way. Absolutely not. Incompatible. I won’t give him my blessings.”

“Who are you to grant blessings?” you hissed with a bulging vein of frustration. “And no, it's not what you think! I—” you wanted to kick yourself for stumbling over your words, “—I just respect him in a way an underclassman would!”

Gojo let out a strained laugh.

To him, you were this cute little junior who looked funny when mad. Riling you up was on his daily to-do list, and poking fun at your obvious crush on his best friend was supposed to double the fun, until it made him wonder despite himself... just what exactly did Suguru have that he apparently lacked, leading you to always follow him with your eyes, whereas you spared him with nothing but glares and sharp retorts?

You didn’t exactly hide your feelings. Whenever Geto was nearby or greeted you in the mornings, you'd blush like a tomato. It was silly, because Gojo was sure his best friend’s type wasn’t a girl as skittish as you—surely, it must be someone as vivacious as Inoue Waka.

He knew you were doomed to fail.

"I suggest you go pick up some slack," he teased. "Better if you don't become a dead weight while assisting him in missions, no?"

He knows. Really.

"...do you know that there are only three things I can't stand here?"

"And those are?"

But...

"Your stupid glasses, your Limitless—and you."

He was still irked, regardless.

"Well, poor you, then," he shrugged, shit-eating grin on his face. This time he pushed his luck. "Do you know that you're nowhere nearing Suguru's type?"

Scratch that. You hate him. You turned to him with a reddened face, and it wasn't because you were blushing.

"I'm going by myself!" you declared, seething. "I couldn't care less about what you're about to do—I'm finishing this and going home!"

With that, you you marched towards the haunted house, paying no heed to his taunts behind you.

You felt a wave of embarrassment washing over. Gojo always messed with you and normally you would chalk it up as one of his shits—but this time, you didn't appreciate how he touched on that sore spot of your not-so-hidden infatuation with Geto. So what if you weren't his ideal type? He didn't have to be mean!

But soon you regretted leaving his side, as a monstrous cursed spirit quickly chased you out.

Gojo was still outside, bidding his time. He merely huffed when he heard you screaming in fear.

He was ready with a jab. "Well, well... Look who's running back into my arms—"

But his smirk quickly fell when he saw the cursed entity was apparently way beyond your level. You ran out—no, by some idiotic impulse of survival, you actually leapt out of the two-story window and almost fell flat on your face and broke your bones, but before then, he sprung to action, catching you, wrapping one arm on your waist.

You were grateful you that you weren't doomed—until you felt yourself dangling mid air in his hold... like a cat.

"Gojo!" you wailed. "I'm going to fa—!"

Oh, but Gojo was convinced that this was his moment to shine. He directed a smirk your way as the bright blue mass in his hand totally caught your attention. With one swift flick of his hand, he muttered the mantra for Blue, and exorcised the cursed spirit in one go.

He marveled at his own show of power—and hoping that somehow, you would too. Then, he placed his hand under your knees, repositioning you in a princess-carry, and the way your gentle curves nestled snugly in his arms sparked some intriguing thoughts in him.

Your wide, crystal-clear eyes gazed at him with such wonder. Red tinted your cheeks. The corners of his mouth curved into a winning smile.

It was at that exact moment when he realized it: he wants you. This funny girl who often made his day, he wanted you to look at his way too.

...but goddamnit, you like Suguru.

"Well, not that scary now with me around, isn’t it?" he boldly announced, and your amazed expression immediately turned into a cute frown.

"Thanks," you blurted, still with rosy cheeks and looked frazzled, but then you realized the state you were in his arms. "But—put me down!"

"Ehhh, I will if your feet can reach the ground!"

Who cares if you like Suguru? As he burst into snickers and you screamed at his face, Gojo Satoru decided then and there—in that spring of 2006—that he would make it his mission to win you over. To make you his.

And years later, not only he achieved that but also so much more—a ring on your finger serving as the testament to his success.

Epilogue

"Yaga-sensei," Geto sighed wearily. "Can I be paired with Shoko, please?"

"Geto-san, wait, please—" you frantically tried to explain, glaring at Gojo in the process. "I'll do my best so—"

"You're such a bother, even Suguru doesn't want to go on missions with you," the white-haired clown remarked with an evil grin. "Right, Suguru?"

"No, Satoru—"

"Well, but if it's me, I'll gladly mentor and teach you though~"

"I don't want you! You're so insufferably annoying!"

"Yaga-sensei, can I please get paired with someone else—"

[danveration]

Sleep well, amour Pt. 2

Parings: Alastor x reader

Summary: After falling asleep to his voice, you wake up and get confronted by Alastor. Later, you walk in on him sleeping.

Word count: 1523

Warnings: Mention of Alastor eating and k*lling a deer

part one

A/N: PART TWO IS HERE!!! I had SO many options wracking my brain on where to take this, but I picked this one! I hope you all enjoy it :’) let me know if you have any feedback, I’d love to hear it. Also, I’m currently working on all the requests I got :) as well as part 2 to that-no-good-first-man-on-earth

You wake up, blinking and looking around. Momentarily forgetting where you are.

Shit. You fell asleep in Alastor’s recording room. Thankfully, he isn’t here right now.

Before you could get up, you notice a purple blanket on you. It seems to be the one that was on his coat hanger. Did Alastor put this on you..? The thought has you smiling and your cheeks reddening.

Alastor’s voice sure does have an effect on you. You look outside to see what time it is, but remember that it’s Hell and the sky is always the same shade of red. You’re going to have to get used to that.

Getting up, you put the blanket back on the hanger and look around some more. It feels some-what intimate right now to be in his space when he’s not around. You wonder how long you’ve been asleep for.

You walk over to his table and notice a red “play” button on his radio equipment and are tempted to press it. It surely won’t cause any harm to hear what he was talking about when you were asleep. You press it and listen.

“Haha! For any sinner, I know it’s a tempting question. But I-“ The recording fast forwards. “Nevertheless, I find it quite amusing that this technology box thinks he is on any sort of level to me! Call me crazy but the sinners have been taaallkinggg, and they think he sounds quite obsessed.” He laughs, knowing Vox is probably listening.

You smile at his voice and find it funny how he is a bit of a drama queen when it comes to his radio broadcasts. You know deep down he doesn’t actually care about the whole situation with Vox, but it’s still funny how he entertains it.

Looking to your right, you see a mug that has “Oh Deer” written on it. There seems to be a bit of black coffee still left in the mug. The “deer” reference made you giggle. You’ve always wondered about his past and how exactly he is part deer anyhow. Oh well, It’ll reveal itself with time.

You’re looking at all the other buttons on his equipment, wondering what they do, when all of a sudden you hear light footsteps on the other side of the door. It’s most likely Alastor. Nobody would willingly go to his room without permission.

The door opens slowly and in steps Alastor. You notice how he opened the door quietly, to not make make much noise. As he still assumed you were asleep. You smiled at that.

He looks ahead and sees you, immediately smiling. “Ah! My dear. You’re awake!” He claps his hands together, his cane leaning on his side.

“Hey Al. Um.. about what happened I-“ You start.

“Ah, ah! No need to explain yourself, sweetheart! Don’t go giving yourself a headache.” He cuts in and laughs.

He looks down at you and says, “you just find comfort in my voice, don’t you?” He asks, with a smug smile.

Your eyes go wide and you stutter. Of course it wasn’t the most secretive thing. Still, you didn’t think he actually knew.

“U-um. Well..” You say.

He tilts his head to side as if saying, “Go on…”

There’s really no getting out of this. Plus, you don’t think Alastor would actually care. He’d probably just find it funny.

“Yeah, I do.” You admit. “I find comfort in your voice, of course I do! I just.. I don’t know.”

You aren’t sure what to say, it’s a tad embarrassing.

Alastor begins to laugh.

“I certainly could tell! I find it quite amusing if I do say so myself.” He says.

He definitely doesn’t mind it, he has a soft spot for you. But he’s also a bit confused on why you even do. He knows his radio voice is unique, but nobody ever commented on it bringing them comfort. They usually scream and run away when they hear him. You’ve been there long enough to see him kill and do so many things that people describe as “horrible, satanic, terrifying” but you still find comfort in him nevertheless? He thinks it’s absolutely adorable!

“Amusing?” You ask.

He nods and says, “Amusing, darling! I mean.. you know who I am, do you not?” He laughs and continues. “Though you still find comfort.. now that’s an interesting fact, don’t you think?”

You shy away, looking anywhere but him. You’re comfortable around him, of course, but you’re a tiny but embarrassed of this whole situation. You know he is definitely loving his though.

He places a finger on your jaw and guides your head back to look at him.

“Uh, uh, dear. There’s no need to feel shy! I never said it was a bad thing. I’m truly honoured!” He says, smiling down at you.

You and him have been getting to know each other for a while now and you’ve just been going deeply and deeply more interested in him. You almost laugh at yourself because you sometimes act as if you did when you alive, how you obsessed over fictional characters and “fan fiction.”

You look at him and say, “Well, that’s good then.” You chuckle.

“Mm, it is isn’t it?” He says.

He thinks you’re absolutely pathetic, but in a good way. He wouldn’t let anything hurt you, this new sensation is something he never wants to get rid of.

———————————————————————

Later that day, Charlie wanted you to pass a message on to Alastor about the hotel reservations. You knew he was in his room because he mentioned that if you needed him, he’d be in there having some dinner (aka, deer). Which he has in his half room half forest. You really wonder how on earth he even did that. The wonders of being a radio demon!

You’re at his door, lightly knocking. You wait a few seconds but you don’t hear anything from the other side.

“Al?” You question while knocking again.

“Hm.” You think.

You aren’t sure if you should go in or not. Sure, the thing Charlie told you about could wait but you also wanted to make sure he was okay. What if he.. choked or something? You’re sure the radio demon could handle that but you just want to make sure.

“Al, I’m coming in.. okay?” You say while knocking once more.

You slowly twist the knob and push the door open. Peaking in, you see him on the other side of the room, in a chair.

“Alastor, are you alr-“ You stop yourself when you notice his eyes are closed.

Closing the door behind you, you walk up to him.

He’s currently sitting in the chair, his arm on the table and his head resting on his hand. He looks so peaceful. His mouth isn’t smiling and his face just looks so.. relaxed. You’ve never saw him like this before. He mumbles occasionally and his ears twitch every so often as he sleeps. You aren’t sure how he finds this position comfortable, but you smile at it nonetheless.

You don’t want to disturb him so you leave, now relaxed that you know he’s okay.

Right before you grab the knob of the door, you hear, “Y/n?”

You whip your head back and you see him standing up, looking at you with his smile.

“Did you need something, dear?” He asks, as if he wasn’t just dead asleep a second ago.

Of course, it makes sense he is a light sleeper.

“O-oh, no. Charlie just wanted me to tell you that the renovations went well and that the guys who inspect the place will be here tomorrow!” You say. “Sorry if I disturbed you.”

“Ahh, alright! And nonsense! You couldn’t disturb me.” He says.

You look at him and smile.

“You know, you could join me if you want! I was just resting and then going to have some dinner.” He offers.

You perk up but then remember that Husk assigned you a task of picking up crates of whiskey for the bar.

“Shit, sorry. I can’t. I have to go get more alcohol for the bar.” You say with a frown.

“More? If I remember correctly, we just got new shipments in.. last week?” He says with a laugh. “Though I’m not surprised we ran out again. Husker is a busy man. Well, my dear. Some other time, then!”

You notice him looking back into the forest, eyeing a deer.

“Yeah, some other time.” You smile. “Have a good dinner, Alastor!”

He smiles back at you says, “Oh I will.” He chuckles, his radio eyes making an appearance as he looks back the deer.

“You have yourself a lovely day, sweetheart!” He says with a wave.

“You too!” Waving back, you then open the door and leave. Once you leave you hear shrieking on the other side of the door, definitely the deer that Al was eyeing.

You’re excited to have more encounters with him, and even take him up on the dinner offer! You remember him mentioning he wanted to introduce you to his friend, Rosie. You’re looking forward to it.

[talaok]

Okay so I’m thinking Pedro x Actress!reader where another famous guy/actor says in an interview that he has a crush on us which makes Pedro a bit jealous and then we all end up at the same event - maybe Pedro gets abit angsty with him but he’s super loving and affectionate toward us…

warnings: jelousy

a/n: it goes without saying that i apologize for the wait babe, i really loved this request 

It wasn't that he hated him, it was just that if anything were to happen to him he wouldn't be the one to cry, that's all...

and maybe he'd thought about punching that smug look off his face once... or twice... or every time the thought of him came up.

But it still wasn't hate

Hate is a strong word, and Pedro wasn't not one to throw it around easily, he was all for peace and love and everything but this guy... this guy was really pushing the limits

And what the actual fuck was he even doing here tonight?

"You're staring"

Your soft, amused voice pulled him out of his own thoughts, his eyes sliding to you

"I just don't get why he's here"

You stifled a laugh as you answered "The same reason why we are baby"

"he's not even nominated" he grumbled,

"neither am I" You smiled, placing your hand on his cheek, feeling his soft scruff graze your palm "It's not a big deal babe, he probably said my name just because it was the first one that popped into his mind" you shook your head "I bet it's not even true"

Yeah right

He would have believed that if you were anybody else, but you... fuck- it didn't take him even a second to fall in love and you expected him to believe that that guy didn't have a crush on you? He would have sooner begun believing that Mark Zuckerberg was one of those lizard guys.

You were everything anyone could have ever dreamed of, you were funny, so incredibly smart it made him feel like a fifth grader in comparison, and god you were the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen 

he knew what you did to men, he knew what you did to men because that's exactly what you did to him,

and he didn't even mind that much, he'd never been the jealous type, but the problem with Shawn wasn't that he liked you (because he clearly did), but it was that he had the audacity, the smugness to fucking say it out loud, to admit it in front of a camera for anyone to see, like the woman he was talking about didn't have a husband, like he wasn't her fucking husband.

"I saw him look at you before"

This time, you did let out a little snort

"what, how dares he?" you mocked him, laughing again as his face remained completely unamused "It's your big night babe, don't let this silly little thing ruin it, please"

But just then, just when he was finally starting to let go a little, the focus of all of his loathing appeared beside you

"I'm sorry to interrupt-"

Then fucking don't

"I just wanted to introduce myself" 

Shawn's eyes were only on you, as if he didn't even exist, as if your hands hadn't been on his cheeks but a moment prior

"I'm Shawn," he said, offering his hand to you "I'm... well, I'm a really big fan" he ended with a soft laugh, smiling in that charming way that surely made women all woozy

"Hi Shawn, it's a pleasure to meet you-"

As you shook his hand, Pedro was closing his into fists

This fucking guy-

"Hi pal"

Pedro's voice didn't sound even a little bit not completely pissed off

"I'm Pedro," he said "her husband"

The flicker of amusement that sparked behind his eyes made Pedro seriously ponder whether or not a little punch was that bad of an idea

"Oh, I didn't know you were married"

Andrew's eyes were back to you, and god it was taking all of Pedro not to grab him and throw him to the other side of the room

Just the fact that he was looking your way seemed too much, 

How dare he look at you, at his beautiful wife, at the love of his life?

It felt wrong, it was wrong, and it was making him furious

"I'm sure you didn't" Pedro grunted, taking a slow step closer to him "Shawn right?" he asked, even though he knew much too well who he was "What exactly are you doing here?" Pedro's eyes narrowed, his head tilting "I didn't notice your name in any of the nominations"

"baby" your soft warning was met with a soft smile from him, one that faded into a stoic/murderous gaze as soon as your husband's eyes were back on the man before him

"I'm just asking a question sweetheart, that's all"

Shawn seemed to accept Pedro's challenge in the blink of an eye

"I'm here with a friend, he's the one that got the nom"

Pedro nodded slowly, "ah. Right," he said, his hand going to your back and drawing gentle circles on it

He didn't miss the way Shawn followed the movement

"And why exactly are you talking to my wife Shawn?"

Now that, that seemed to take him aback a little, but he recovered quickly

"What?" he laughed "is no one allowed to talk to your wife without your permission or something?"

"Oh absolutely not, my wife can talk to whomever she wishes," Pedro spoke "I'm just not very fond of her talking to men that have openly admitted to liking her" he shrugged as if his eyes and voice weren't yelling murder 

You, in the meantime, were busy looking for the fastest way out of this place

"You've seen the video," Shawn said more like a statement

"I sure did" Your husband nodded "I especially liked the part where you described her as your "dream woman""

Shawn sighed loudly, shaking his head

"listen, man-"

"No, you listen, man" Pedro interrupted him "How 'bout you get the fuck away from me and my wife, mh?" he said more like a threat "How bout that?"

Shawn let out a loud breath before responding

"whatever man" he sighed, his eyes moving to you "It was nice to meet you y/n, maybe we can meet another time..." he glanced to the man on your right "when the guard dog isn't around"

"yeah" Pedro scoffed "Go fuck yourself, buddy"

You both stared at his back as he walked away, but after no more than two seconds, you couldn't help but let your lips pull into the smile you'd been holding this whole time

"that was a bit harsh"

Pedro only grinned as he brought you flash against him with his hands on your waist

"Like you haven't done worse" he smirked

Yeah... while Pedro wasn't usually jealous, you were... let's just say you were not exactly on the same wavelength

"you looked ready to kill him" you chuckled, wrapping your arms behind his neck

"mh" he hummed, ghosting your mouth "Who says I wasn't" he teased, his lips crashing with yours in a long, deep kiss that Pedro absolutely didn't wish for Shawn to be witnessing

[txttletale]

roadhogsbigbelly is doubling down. genuinely incredible (yes i am aware how deeply funny it is to start a serious post with that sentence. it is my one allotment of levity)

oh okay you just assumed that "loliporn" was involved and something that i deserved to be associated with defending and accused of making "integral to the queer identity" because of stuff that the OP (who i cannot stress enough i never followed or talked to or knew in any fucking way!) did that got called out months after i made my addition?

the rest of his post is just a very lengthy way of saying "umm if you didn't want to be called a pedophile because you were mean about stardew valley maybe you should be more careful about how you reblog from". yeah buddy im sure you apply that standard to yourself too huh. im sure you pull out your Bad Person detector every time you reblog a fucking post and beam OP with it. you literally screenshot my post about how as a trans women i get this standard uniquely applied to me and went "um its a good standard though. answer for the actions of every fucking person youve ever reblogged a post by".

and all this whole fucking schtick where he's like "ummmm im not calling you a pedophile :) i just assumed you thought 'loliporn was integral to the queer identity' based on source: i made it up and am going out of my way to repeatedly say you're agreeing with pedophiles and not being wary enough about pedophiles and that 99% of people who make the type of post im accusing you of making are pedophiles" is so fucking pathetic and if you fall for it you are a blatant transmisogynist like come the fuck on man.

i am no longer having a nice time on the computer, i am pretty fucking angry. and all this because he "doesnt have much skin in the game" but he doesn't like my stardew valley takes! yeah man real proportionate response.

not to mention the aside he makes to say 'wah wah someone told me to kill myself' amiguito do you have any fucking idea what my inbox has looked like since this entire transmisogynistic harassment campaign began a week ago? i delete those asks because i'm not into flaunting every piece of online abuse i get to make myself look like the victim in computer arguments but it has been constant and graphic! breaking news, women are people too, some of the most cutting-edge research suggests they might even have feelings!

"oh i censored her identity i dont know how she even found it" oh okay so you were anonymously pedojacketing me to your thousands of followers while vaguing about a post i made that had thousands of notes and using the same screenshot that an uncensored version of was passed around with thousands of notes as part of a transmisogynistic harassment campaign last fucking week?

how could anyone possibly have guessed it was me! it's a real mystery man it was basically witness protection. "oh but i didn't know, i didn't know she was trans", maybe he'll also say he didn't know about the harassment campaign, hey fucker, maybe apply some of the constant scrutiny you're reserving for women who are mean about farming game and apply it to yourself and consider looking into these things before baselessly making pedo accusations against someone!

this transmisogynistic crybully shit is absolutely fucking insufferable and i am absolutely sick of it and anyone who buys into it. i'm done assuming good faith or ignorance. i am not going to be a good placid little bullying target and acquiesce to this vile shit. it's truly fucking incredible that a tme guy can be found out as an actual pedophile and guys like mr. belly can immediately jump into action to use this as an opportunity to denounce a trans woman who had one interaction with him ever that consisted of five minutes spent typing an addition to a post and hitting ''reblog''. & if you don't find that sickening then straight up you are not safe for trans women to be around.

[eddiemunsons-missingnipple]

Just imagining what it would be like for you and Eddie to both drunk and looking for each other. You don't realize you've been talking to one another the whole time.

Steve's party had been going on now practically all night. You and Eddie arrived hours ago, and now you can't seem to find each other. He went off with his friends, and so did you. You mingled and stayed close together when you first got there. But soon, you unintentionally drifted away the drunker you got.

Your face was tingling, and your head felt so heavy. Your whole body just wasn't corporating. Your limbs felt like they were in a constant battle to keep you standing or even walking straight. You kept calling out for Eddie.

You wanted to go home but knew he wasn't driving. Not in the condition he was probably in. He got drunk way before you did. You saw him throwing back shot after shot. Then chasing it down with his favorite beer, a pbr. The thought of the taste is already making you gag. He was a lightweight no matter how much he tried arguing against it.

You were stumbling and kept calling for your boyfriend. "Eddie!"

You even grabbed some random dude just because he had longish hair. He was definitely not your Eddie. You made a face of diagust and mumbled "ew" under your breath when the guy turned around.

The party kept getting louder the drunker you became. Everyone kinda started looking a like. Your vision was nothing but a blur. You even confused Nancy for Steve at one point. All because she had on his jacket.

The funny thing is that she never even bothered to correct you. If it wasn't for Robin speaking up to tell you, it was actually Nancy you were talking to. You would still be calling her Steve the rest of the time.

The killer hangover you're destined to have in the morning made you wish you never started drinking tonight. Too late. You knew you were screwed by the fifth shot of tequila. You and Eddie were going to be in misery.

You stumble again and flop down on the couch next to someone. A man who you really can't even focus on any distinctive features. He's just there slumped back with his legs spread open holding a candle that he assumed was his beer can.

You may be drunk off your ass but not drunk enough to mistake a candle for a can of beer. You look over, and he's nothing but a blurry figure to you. You blink and blink, trying to figure out who he is. Your drunkened mind comes up with nothing. He is another stranger to you. Little did you know that's actually your boyfriend. Who you have been on the hunt for all night long.

You heard him mumbling something in coherent over and over again.

"What you say?" You slurred.

He burped before repeating. "I said you have seen my girlfriend? She's cute. You can't miss her."

"Oh no havent seen her...m'lookin for my boyfriend actually. He's a nerd you can't miss'em" you giggled and sat up a little.

"Haven't seen any nerds around." Eddie quipped and went to take a drink from the candle.

He made a face when nothing went into his mouth. He still has yet to notice his actual beer is on the table.

"Been lookin' for her all night. I even cried at the beer keg." He sounded like he was about to cry again. "Guys out there forced me to come sit down to calm myself."

You put your hand on his shoulder to comfort him. He sounded so sad you couldn't help but feel bad for him. "She's around here somewhere."

"My boyfriend is missing too, startin' to think he's in a bush passed out." You rubbed your eyes and laid back against the couch.

Eddie snorts and goes in his pocket to grab his pack of cigarettes.

"All I know is when I find that little shit I can pass out in peace." He slurred and practically ripped open his pack of cigarettes to get one out.

"Yeah, me too-- When I find my boyfriend, I'm passing out too." You hiccuped, and your eyes slowly got heavier. The party started to die down a lot. People were falling asleep or walking home.

"When you'd get here?" Eddie turned to face you. "Been lookin' for you all night!"

[yournightmary]

you should write something where reader is a primary teacher, and ellie is a volunteer/fill in music teacher :D they meet and romance happens or something (i’m bad with words 😀) <3

Play Date | E.W.

content warning:: fem!reader, I guess dealer!Ellie but not really?, bad writing

AN:: not proofread because i’d rather shoot myself than read my own writing. I’m so sorry if it’s bad but i’ve tried my best😔 also no idea hot to tittle things

Whoever told you that being a daycare volunteer is a good idea was wrong- on many, many levels may I add.

You always thought that kids were just cute tiny humans but that changed with your first day at the daycare in Jackson. Most of the kids were boys, there were maybe three girls total. And you never even took into consideration that fall just started, so did every kind of colds and sicknesses possible.

What’s worse than a snotty, nasty seven year old boy tugging on your shirt with his grimy hands? A whole room of them. You only took this job because Maria asked you to. She said something about you ‘wasting your potential by going on patrols’. And by potential she meant the fact that you can read, write and do basic math… sometimes.

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

You pushed the door of the daycare building open, furrowing your brows softly at the scratchy sound they’d made. It was almost winter, thankfully. Maria said you wouldn’t have to work once the snow falls, something about patrols not going out as often in bad weather. You shrugged off your jacket, hanging it on the wooden coat rack.

Before you could do anything else you’ve heard a knock on the door, immediately rolling your eyes in annoyance. You took your sweet time getting to it, muttering profanities under your breath.

“Daycare isn’t open until 7:30, sorry.” You opened the door with a sigh, your tone as cold as the outside air.

“Uh- Maria asked me to help you? She said to come here after 6:00 but- I uh, overslept.” Your eyes widened slightly, seeing the girl before you.

Ellie Williams. What the actual fuck?

You stared at her in disbelief, finally noticing the guitar in her hands. She scratched her neck nervously, awkwardly shifting from one foot to the other.

“You gonna let me in?” You slapped yourself mentally, stepping away from the door. She walked in, muttering a quiet ‘thanks’.

Ellie placed her guitar against one of the many chairs, curiously looking around the daycare. She traced all of the drawings on the walls, wondering about the stories behind each of them.

“Why did Maria want you to help me?” You asked her after a while, sorting through all of the pencils and sharpening dull ones.

“That’s a funny story… I did something she didn’t like and this is my punishment, I guess- not that I don’t like you! I’m just… bad with kids.” Ellie stumbled over her words a little, looking everywhere but at you.

“Well, what did you do?” You raised your eyebrow, even if she wasn’t facing your way. You sighed softly before adding. “And don’t worry- this feels like a punishment to me too… and I volunteered.”

Ellie snickered before circling around some tables and sitting down next to you, grouping all the pencils by color and placing them in their assigned little boxes.

“She found out I was dealing.” She shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly, though you could hear the nervousness in her tone. “Weed, you know? Said ‘I’m corrupting Jackson’”

“Shit, you’ve been dealing?” You unintentionally raised your voice, turning your head to look at her with furrowed brows. She raised her head slowly, nodding with an anxious expression. “Why didn’t you tell me anything? I felt bad for nagging Dina and she didn’t want to tell where she gets it from.”

Ellie’s jaw dropped as she looked at you baffled, the pencil she was holding almost falling out of her hand.

“I didn’t know you smoked, sorry.” She muttered, not expecting the way you reacted.

“I don’t look the part, huh?” You looked down at your clothes, the white collar peeking out of your beige sweater and your brown pants cuffed nicely, even if it exposed your ankles to the cold winter air.

Ellie shook her head to the sides with a chuckle, taking the opportunity and looking you up and down. After a moment in awkward silence she spoke up, fiddling with her fingers nervously.

“So why don’t you go on patrols? I mean, you’re really smart and stuff. You could be useful.” The way she said it sounded almost like an invitation, raising her brows slightly while glancing at you.

“Well, Maria said that I’m too smart for patrols. That I’ll be more useful as a teacher.” You giggled, rolling your eyes at the memory.

“That’s a shame… There’s this spot on one of the routes, you can see whole Jackson from there.” Ellie frowned softly, smacking her lips in disappointment.

You hummed in agreement, understanding what she was getting at. Maybe once winter comes Maria will let you go on a patrol with Ellie, just maybe. You placed a few sheets of paper in front of her, handing her a black pen.

“You can draw, right? Make some coloring pages, I gotta clean up before the kids come.” You said with a smile while standing up from the little table you were sitting at, not waiting for her answer.

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

The kids came in earlier than usual, the room filling up an hour after you opened. After some discussing Ellie decided to take care of the arts&crafts corner, playing a song on her guitar whenever she got a request while you taught the older kids how to multiply. You couldn’t help but steal glances at Ellie, looking away quickly when her eyes meet yours.

“Miss, why are looking at Ellie like that? Do you like like her?” You hushed the girl with furrowed brows, your cheeks burning slightly.

“Keep your eyes on your paper, Maya.” You muttered, tapping your finger against the worksheet you prepared for her. Why were kids so nosy?

You glanced at Ellie only to find her already looking at you, rolling her eyes annoyed. You giggled quietly, nodding your head in agreement. You quickly made sure everyone understood their assignments and walked over to Ellie, a smile appearing on her lips once she noticed you.

“How’s it going? Any troublemakers?” You asked jokingly, looking suspiciously at every kid with a smirk. Almost every one of them shook their head, letting you know they were on their best behavior.

“They’re all good, don’t worry.” Ellie said with a smile, admiring the way you quietly praised the boy who showed you the drawing he made today.

“That’s good to hear.” You nodded your head, stepping away with Ellie to a more secluded place. “They’re usually so much worse, maybe you’re a good influence.”

“Tell that to Maria.” Ellie snickered, tucking her short hair behind her ears. She scrunched her nose, glancing at the kids a little disgusted. “One of them sneezed into his hand and then grabbed mine though, have you ever thought about teaching manners?”

“Thank you so much for that idea, I’ve never thought about that!” You said sarcastically, pointing your finger at her while nodding your head. “But seriously, I’ve tried. They just don’t care.”

You sighed in defeat, dropping your hands to your sides. Ellie hummed in acknowledgment, looking at the kids coloring the drawings she made for them earlier.

“You play beautifully, by the way.” You nodded your head awkwardly, the words leaving your mouth before you could even think about them.

Ellie blushed lightly, biting back a grin that was threading to spread across her lips. “Thanks” She muttered quietly, looking away from you sheepishly.

She opened her mouth to add something but was cut off by some kid calling your name, asking you to help them with something. You shot her an apologetic smile before getting back to your space, leaving her with a bunch of prepubescent boy that already had teasing smirks on their faces, ready to poke fun at Ellie.

·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·

You waved goodbye to the last kid, their parent giving you a grateful smile. You closed the door with a sigh, turning around to face Ellie. She was ready to leave, guitar in one hand and the kids’ drawings she received in the other.

“Can I walk you home?” She asked quickly, looking at you with a hopeful expression. You nodded your head with a smile, putting on your jacket.

“So, how would you rate your first day here?” You locked up the daycare building, stuffing the keys into your pocket.

“Well… it wasn’t bad. I thought it would be much worse.” Ellie hummed, walking right beside you. You bumped your shoulder into hers, smirking softly.

“I gotta say- you being there made it a lot better than usual… and I’m not talking just about the help.” She looked away sheepishly, unable to stop her lips from curling into a smile.

You walked in comfortable silence, stealing sneaky glances at each other when the other one wasn’t looking. Your hand brushed up against Ellie’s, making her gasp softly.

“Wow, you’re freezing.” She grabbed both of your hands into hers, standing in place. She rubbed her palms against the back of your hands, trying to warm you up.

“Yeah, it’s really cold today.” You giggled nervously, your cheeks heating up at her touch. She kept her grasp on one of your hands, swinging them softly between you as you walked. Smooth.

After a few minutes you finally got to your house, a little bummed out that your little trip is over. You stood before your front door, looking at Ellie shift from one foot to the other. She sighed, fiddling with her fingers nervously.

“How about I pick you up tomorrow? We could walk together.” Ellie suggested, taking a deep breath between her words. She rocked on the balls of her feet slightly, waiting for your answer impatiently.

“Okay.” You nodded your head with a grin, your hand resting on the doorknob. Ellie’s shoulders relaxed almost immediately, her own lips curling into a smile.

“Alright, cool… does 6 sound good?” You hummed in agreement, your eyes locked onto Ellie’s.

You stood there for a moment, in awkward- but not negative- silence. Ellie tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear, breaking the eye contact by looking around nervously. You took your chance, standing on your tip toes and pecking Ellie’s cheek. She froze up, her eyes widening. Fuck, did you read it wrong?

“I’m sorry- I dunno why I did that.” You started apologizing, waving your hands around. Ellie grabbed both of them, shaking her head to the sides.

“It’s okay! You surprised me, that’s all.” She tried to hold back her smile but failed miserably, her ears and cheeks turning beet red. “I’ll uh- I should head back.”

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.” You nodded your head, sighing in relief at Ellie’s words. You gave her one last smile before walking into your home, closing the door softly.

You really hope the snow won’t come soon.

I HATE THIS SO MUCH IM GONNA RIP MY HAIR OUT😭

[ant111fragile]

MY VOID SUCCESS STORY!!

My Void state Journey+Baby steps

I first came to know about the void state when @gorgeouslypink shared her success story and like everyone else I got obsessed with the idea of having everything at once since I didn't put my all in manifesting and couldn't manifest consciously except for ice cream that shit always manifests lmao. So like I said I was obsessed I started trying like any amateur but every time I'd lay on bed and affirm i wouldn't even realise when I would fall asleep and wake up to the same shit but one thing good about me is i would never spiral.. So for more than a couple months I tried the 10k affirmation challenge for void concept/void state affs cuz everyone was suggesting it but guess what i never actually completed it. I would start over and over cuz I didn't had no consistency and never completed it until last week I FINALLY did!!

What I think worked for me

I actually completed the 10k aff challenge and reached 12000 affirmations on 7th jan It didn't have any specific effect on my mind since I feel like I had always believed in my vc but I think what went right was my brain ACTUALLY REALLY was saturated after the consistent affs I fed myself with. And then at night of 8th Jan I tapped into the void.

Entering the void+experience.

So i went to bed at the usual time I'd always attempt the void and this time I sat upright on bed with pillows to support my back well. I put on the void state/epsilon waves subliminal by slade. From YouTube (this shit is good.)

and did my routine as I had scripted : I counted till 300 with deep breaths but you can count less. I did it cuz it takes me too much to relax and kinda concentrate (Till then I had already experienced the being pulled in feeling and it had went away but I was calm I did not even pay attention to it.) My body was numb by then and I started to affirm "I am in the void state " Bringing back my normal pace of breathing. After a while i started to float and get the usual symptoms like spinning and and an inner earthquake lmao but yeah I tried my best to keep focusing on affs which automatically results in ignoring symptoms. again that ascending feeling of being pulled came back. So I kept affirming and I visualised the black hole kinda shit in my head take me to the void and the next thing I know I'm in a completely feelingless place no subliminal sound and I was damn relaxed but that the same time too excited and even though I didn't like instantly got thrown out I still got out without even affirming I kinda forgot? Sounds funny but might happen. That's pretty much it. So I took a day off to relax and sustain that feeling I'm entering today again to manifest my desired life.

Tips + advice

‌do not follow somebody else's methods if your conditions don't align with the routine or something.

‌try the 10k aff challenge for your vc. If you don't enter at 10,000 try 15k then 20k then 30k and don't fck with me you'll reach by then alright.

‌since it's your own state you just have to tap into it sooner or later you will so don't be stressed and attempt. Just tap into it cause you will.

‌everytime you wake up to your same reality affirm you are one step closer. Or you did enter and you're entering again. Don't repeat the old story.

‌subliminals or music they only serve to relax you only you hold the ultimate power.

‌don't look/ask for methods. There are enough methods already and it's only a matter of time when you'll find your own.

‌chile

All the blogs who helped me with my mindset shift are @uniquelymeandmyworld @rosellesworkshop @fleurlx @konniesreality @gorgeouslypink thank you all so much for everything you guys do it's literally selfless and I can't with the people who throw shade on y'all!!

Also thanks to @voidsuccess they really help with the success stories!!

[amongemeraldclouds]

better than revenge | chapter one: falling for me, dear?

Lorenzo Berkshire x Slytherin!reader (ft. Ex!Mattheo Riddle)

Series trope: Fake dating

Chapter one summary: While trying to hide from your ex-boyfriend Mattheo, you run into a potential ally and the scheming starts.

Warning: Swearing, allusion to cheating

Author's note: I prefer using I instead of you to refer to the reader. Feel free to comment if you’d like me to tag you when the next one goes live.

Aahh I'm so excited to publish this! It's my first time writing fan fiction and doing a series. I used to write fictional one shots years ago when I was 15. Anyway, enjoy reading! Happy to receive feedback.

main masterlist | series masterlist | chapter two: practice?

What is Mattheo Riddle doing in the library at this hour? He’s supposed to be in class.

I close my book and grab my bag. Trying to tame my racing heart, I sneak off to the shelves. He can’t see me, nope. He no longer has the privilege to interact with me in any way, not since he broke my heart.

I curse inward, walking back, further down the shelves. My eyes dart from him and the exit, mapping out my escape plan. If I wait for him to pass the next five rows of shelves, I can—

“Oof,” I drop my book as I hit something behind me. No, not something. Someone.

I nearly fall but then strong arms catch me. “Falling for me, dear?” I hear a deep, playful voice. Lorenzo Berkshire, we knew each other casually but he and Mattheo are rivals despite being half brothers so I never had much opportunities to speak to him when we dated.

“Ha, funny Berkshire. Maybe if you didn’t randomly stand by shelves, then people wouldn’t knock into you,” I say grabbing my things off the floor and composing myself.

He raises an eyebrow, “maybe if you didn’t walk backwards, you’d actually see where you’re walking.”

“Maybe if your brother stuck to his schedule and he was where he needed to be then I wouldn’t have to go sneaking around the damn library at my damn school. Like I’m the one who did something wrong,” I reply.

“First of all, it’s half brother. And second—what?” His eyebrows knit together.

“Why are you avoiding Mattheo?” His voice softens.

I look away from him and my cheeks burn. “I just don’t want to see him,” I whisper, trying to keep my voice steady. It’s been three weeks yet the memories felt fresh in my mind. A night of forbidden kisses and broken promises. I can feel my eyes sting and it takes everything in me to hold it all in. 

“I don’t know what happened between you two, but knowing Mattheo, it was definitely his fault,” he says. I look at his grinning face and smile back. 

“Listen,” he leans in conspiratorially and holds his arm out to lean on the shelf.

Footsteps grow louder as Mattheo approaches, watching you smiling up at Lorenzo while he stands intimately close to you. “Get a room!” He chides.

Lorenzo smirks at you then turns to face his brother, “stalk much? If you missed me, brother, you could have just called.”

“Fuck off, Enzo,” Mattheo bites out. “I heard a thud and had to see what is was about.”

“Always looking for trouble,” Lorenzo tsked. “You know what? I’ll take your advice. I’ll fuck off and we’ll get a room.” He turns towards me, “what do you say?”

“I think that’s a great idea,” I take his hand and force a smile, looking at Mattheo for the first time in weeks. God, I missed his brown eyes and those dark curls.

I inwardly slap myself to stay focused. “Thanks for the advice, Mattheo,” I say sweetly. I hold my head high and leave the library with Enzo, my sadness transformed to anger.

“Thanks for the save,” I bump my shoulder against Lorenzo’s once we’re far enough away from the library. 

He bumps my shoulder back, “any chance I can annoy Mattheo is a great opportunity in my book.”

“So listen,” I start, an idea forming in my head. “What if we continue to annoy him?”

“And how do you propose we do that?” He asks.

“By continuing this” I point between us. I didn’t expect it but I felt courageous speaking to Mattheo earlier when I was with Enzo. It felt good.

Lorenzo smirks, “darling, if you wanted to date me, all you have to do is ask.”

I hit his shoulder playfully, “fake date. Honestly, I’m still getting over Mattheo. It wouldn’t be fair. I’m not yet ready to date for real.”

“Let’s do it!” He agrees enthusiastically.

“Wait,” I stop walking. “You agreed too easily, what’s in it for you?”

“Aside from the kindness of my own heart?” He smirks. I roll my eyes.

“Fine. Here’s a tale as old as time: my father wants me to marry a pureblood. Given my dating history, he doesn’t trust me to make the right decision so he’s been setting me up with his friends’ and allies’ daughters this past year. Now normally I don’t mind wining and dining with beautiful ladies, but at this point, I’m exhausted,” he sighs.

I frown, “Shit, that’s a lot of pressure. But why? We’re still young.”

“Right, but he wants to have a strategic marriage that will keep our social status or even elevate it,” Enzo explains.

I catch on, “My father is influential in the political sphere so it would definitely help you.”

“We don’t actually have to date, don’t worry. But it’s enough to keep him off my back just until we graduate and then I’ll have more room to breathe.”

“So that’s why Mattheo was annoyed earlier! If we date, he’ll think you might marry me and then his ex-girlfriend would be his sister in law,” I realize. 

“Exactly, it’s a win-win situation,” Lorenzo grins then looks at his watch. “I have class in ten minutes. Meet me at my dorm later so we can go over the details in private?” I nod in agreement.

Lorenzo leans closer, “can I kiss you on the forehead?”

“Why of course, fake boyfriend,” I whisper with a small smile, finding an odd comfort in his proximity as he places a gentle kiss on my forehead. A few students around us whisper, witnessing something new to gossip about. 

Fake dating, what could go wrong?

main masterlist | series masterlist | chapter two: practice?

[alaskasmonsters]

𝖆 𝖇𝖔𝖜𝖑 𝖔𝖋 𝖗𝖔𝖈𝖐 𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖞 | 𝖕𝖙. 2 (gojo satoru)

pairing: gojo satoru x gn!reader

content: reader has amnesia, pining, oblivious reader, not actually unrequited feelings, misunderstanding, clown behaviour (gojo IS in it after all), fluff, gojo being a softie

w/c: 7.069

summary: your amnesia still wasn't getting better and your confusing feelings for satoru, a man you didn't even remember, didn't help at all. and why did he keep acting so...weird?

a/n: happy april fools! instead of pranking you with a not funny joke like the majority of the internet i decided to give you a gift! the second part you’ve been waiting for for months haha…🥲 i hope the word count makes up for it a little as this did end up long!! i completely underestimated how much work this would be so forgive me for the v long wait 🙏🙏 i hope i didn’t forget to tag anybody!!this time i also can finally say that this is being posted on April fools because gojo is a jOKE! peace and love on planet earth ❤️ alsoo i coloured the header myself as a little extra hehe.

part 1

So. You were in love with Satoru. No biggie. 

You had fallen in love before, maybe even times that lay beyond the reach of your current memories. Loves that weren’t him. Loves that had been lost in the darkness of the six years you couldn’t remember anymore. Years that you feared you would never get back again.

Six years. 

You stared back at the reflection in your mirror, hands absentmindedly picking at your hair. You’ve been trying to make it look nice for the past half an hour but whenever you felt like you were happy enough with how it looked you made up your mind and started tugging at it again. 

You just couldn’t decide how to wear it, whether to smooth it down or mess it up, or maybe use any product. You couldn’t remember how you used to wear it. This haircut wasn’t familiar to you. Hell, not even your face was familiar to you. Your cheeks used to be rounder, your eyebags weren't as prominent before and you couldn’t tell whether you looked tired or you were just growing old. 

“26 isn’t old, you dork”, is what Satoru had told you when you had complained to him about it. It was, though, when you couldn’t remember anything past twenty. 

You sighed, dropping your head against the glass of your bathroom mirror, the glass fogging where your warm breath hit it. 

Yeah, that you were in love with a man you couldn’t remember was only the tip of the iceberg your ‘life-past-amnesia’ ship was steadily heading towards. It was already a mess by itself, sure, but things were worse, way worse than they seemed at first glance. At least they were in this new life that included curses and amnesia spells.

It wasn’t just that you didn’t remember Satoru. Not how you’ve met or how you’ve fallen in love with him. All the moments that had slowly tipped you over the edge or maybe. Maybe there was only one moment that had made you fall for him. Brutal and quick, like a punch to the face. You had a few pictures, the doodle and the promise of the bowl of rock candy. The candy that you were allergic to but Satoru loved. Candy you probably bought just for him to grab handfuls of it and stuff it into his pockets when he came over to visit. 26-year-old you must be helplessly in love. 

The tip of the iceberg though? You didn’t think Satoru returned your feelings. Or the 26-year-old you's feelings at least. Considering how he’s behaved after finding out about your amnesia you were certain that the man only saw you as a friend. Sure, maybe he’s been trying to distance himself from you emotionally, because you not remembering him was hard for him, but that didn’t mean anything. After all, if Satoru felt the same way, if the both of you had been more than friends…wouldn’t he have told you? 

Yeah, he was very strict with the “Don’t tell Y/N anything about the past 6 years” rule but certainly, this would be an exception.

Which meant your love wasn’t just helpless, but also unrequited. 

You sighed, burying your fingers in your hair again and suppressing the need to rip your hair out. 

26-year-old you was such a loser. 

You gave yourself a minute to grieve the loss of your nonexistent coolness, then you straightened up again, carding your fingers through your hair to fix the mess you just created.

You’ve been losing your mind about this issue for way too long already. It’s like you couldn’t think about anything else anymore but Satoru and your feelings for him. Which was ridiculous.  You hadn’t been able to stop thinking about this since last week when you’d first realized that you had liked him, back in your living room when he’d confirmed to you that it was him who drew that ugly sketch for you, the one that looked like the drawing of a child.

Well…it wasn’t ugly…it was kinda cute. Knowing him you could imagine he was doing it to annoy you…or maybe because he tried to make you laugh? When thinking of the little sticky note you could almost picture his wide grin and the way he must have praised himself for drawing such a wonderful masterpiece just for you. Maybe he’d poked your cheek and made fun of your annoyed expression. Maybe he had kissed your cheek right after you’d told him to stop being a menace, giggling against your skin, breath warm and tickl…

Not that he’d done that before. Kiss your cheek. Why did you picture him doing that?

You shook yourself out of your thoughts. This was getting pathetic. Now that you remembered your feelings for him it was almost like they were trying to rush back into your body, like a wave being pulled back to land with force. And with the feelings, the wishful thinking, the yearning, came.    

Not that any of it was real. Your feelings were just a projection of your subconsciousness because you knew you were supposed to have them! And your thoughts were just you being a hopeless romantic, imagining sweet moments between you and Satoru that never happened. 

You barely knew the man. After all, it's been three weeks now, since that day you’ve woken up without your memories. Three weeks. And nothing. Your memories hadn’t returned and you were unable to recall anything from the past 6 years. There was only this stupid feeling of deja-vu you had when Satoru had shown you his eyes and the instinct to call him by his first name when you scolded him. And now those lingering romantic feelings. 

But that didn’t count. It was not enough. 

Why did you like Satoru? Why were you in love with him? You wanted to know so badly you felt like you were going insane. It couldn’t be just because he was pretty, right? You weren’t that shallow, right?

Not that he hadn’t displayed any good qualities so far. He was funny and attentive, he knew your favourite foods and paid attention to what you told him. At the same time he was one of the most annoying people you remember ever meeting and a little infuriating about 50 percent of the time…okay maybe more like 70 percent. And he thought it was funny, too, when he was being an annoying asshole. He always laughed at your sour expression. 

But…his laugh was kind of cute. Even if he was being a prick, you couldn’t stay mad at him for long when you heard him laugh because he kind of snorted when he did and it was ador…Stop.

You grit your teeth and spun around to leave your bathroom. You’ve been spending way too much in there trying to fix your hair, anyway. You were starting to behave weirdly, thinking about Satoru’s laugh and his eyes and his everything. 

Fuck. This was bad. Were you actually in love with him now? Not 26-year-old you. But this you. Even without your memories of him? Pathetic, pathetic, pathetic. 

You stomped through your bedroom, glancing at the clock on your nightstand, the time reading 2:30 PM, before ripping open your closet. You had another 10 minutes. You can’t believe you’ve wasted so much time just being distracted with your hair and thoughts. You were sure that when you had entered the bathroom it had only been around 2 PM. 

You quickly grabbed some pants and a shirt, deeming both acceptable before slipping into them, almost stumbling over your feet as you tried to climb into the pants and then almost hitting your elbow against the closet door as you pulled your shirt over your head. One look in the mirror and you pulled the shirt over your head again. It looked stupid. Not a good fit with the pants.

You started rummaging through your closet again, internally scolding yourself for even bothering that much. You were only going out to grab food with Satoru. It wasn’t a big deal, you were sure you’d done that all the time.

Satoru had told you he’d pick you up. He hadn’t told you where you were going because it was supposed to be a “surprise” but knowing him it wouldn’t be anything too fancy. At least you hoped it wasn’t. He would have told you if it was, right?

You stopped and looked down at your pants. They would work, right?

You shook your head. Again. You did that a lot now. 

You finally decided on a button-up shirt, a little bit too big on you but the material was soft and it looked good. You had to roll up the sleeves a little but then you only had to slip into some shoes and you were ready. 

Just in time, because that was the moment you heard your front door open and Satoru’s voice calling your name in a sing-song voice. 

You groaned, having half a mind to stomp out of your bedroom and throw him out of your apartment. 

“Just because you have a key doesn’t mean you can just come in!” You called through your closed bedroom door – you had expected him to wander into your apartment unannounced.

His laugh was just as cute when the door’s wood muffled it.

“I told you I would be here by 2:30, Yn-chan. I’m on time!” 

You looked back at the clock to find he was right. He was on time. Didn’t mean he didn’t have to knock. This was your apartment, after all. He didn’t live here. 

You looked at yourself in the mirror one more time, giving your outfit a once-over and letting your fingers smooth down your hair one more time before you opened your door and stepped out of your room. 

“One day you’re gonna walk in on me naked and you will not survive that because I will kill you,” you scolded Satoru, waving your finger at him in a warning. 

The man just snickered at your comment, grinning widely as his eyes fell on you. His eyes were neatly hidden behind his sunglasses yet again. Still, you didn’t miss the way they looked you over, studying you with badly concealed amusement. 

You frowned, tensing. Did you look weird?

“Any special occurrence I don’t know about?” Satoru asked innocently, cocking his head at you.

You blinked. “What? Why?”

He didn’t answer immediately but his grin didn’t waver. 

You looked down at your outfit again, wondering if it was too fancy. You knew this wasn’t a date or anything but you couldn’t help but put a little effort into your looks. Maybe it was a little more than you’d usually wear but you didn’t think it was too on the nose. 

When you didn’t seem to understand what Satoru was referring to he took pity on you and stepped closer. 

“Where did you get the shirt from?” He asked, tone light, as he reached out to tug at our sleeve.

You looked down at it, wondering why he wanted to know so badly. The shirt looked like any other. There was nothing really special about it. Maybe it was a little bigger on you but you had plenty of oversized clothes.

“I don’t know. My closet.” You shrugged.

Satoru rolled his eyes beneath his glasses.

“Try to remember!” he insisted, tapping your forehead.

You sighed, tired of this specific game. Still, you knew you had no choice but to indulge him. He was only trying to help you, after all. 

“A gift,” you suggested.

Satoru smiled.

“Very good.”

“Really?” you asked, surprised but excited.

He hummed. “It used to be mine.”

You felt your cheeks heat up. Well…that was something. 

“And you gave it to me? Why?”

Satoru cocked his head to the side, looking at you expectantly. 

You groaned and hit his arm lightly. “I don’t know! Just tell me.”

The grin that snuck on his face was mischievous with an edge of…something. Something that made you feel a little dizzy. When he answered his voice was deeper than before, an edge of huskiness to it. 

“You look cuter in it than I do, Yn-chan.”

You caught yourself before your mouth could drop open, and you could do something stupid like actually swoon. Instead, you scoffed and turned your back to him, pretending to reach for your bag, giving you an opportunity to hide your reddening face from his prying eyes. 

Why did he have to say it like that? Was he trying to be a little shit?

Satoru chuckled as if he knew what you were doing. It didn’t help at all with the warmth in your cheeks. You grind your teeth as you slung your bag over your shoulder, then decide against it, only grabbing your keys and wallet to stuff into the pocket of your jacket. You let out a quiet breath to collect yourself before turning back towards the man. He waited patiently with a small grin on his lips.

“Are you ready?” he asked. 

You hummed and moved past him to step towards the door. You reached for the handle, then you paused. Feeling Satoru’s gaze linger at the back of your head, you touched a hand to your hair again, fiddling with a strand in the back you felt was not sitting right. 

Your lip jutted out in frustration and you had half a mind to excuse yourself to the bathroom to return to your earlier attempt at making your hair sit okay. Before you could do it, you heard Satoru approaching. 

Turning back, the apology you were about to mutter died on your tongue as you saw him leaning over you. His expression was serious as he caught your wrist between your fingers and moved your hand to the side before he started softly moving his fingers through your hair instead. You froze, standing still as he combed down once, twice, giving a harsh tug to one of your strands before he pulled back with a satisfied smile. 

“Here we go. What would you do without me?”

His voice sounded so so soft. 

You swallowed, trying to calm your fluttering heart down as you blinked up at the man who was regarding you with warm eyes. Oh no, oh no no no. 26-year-old you had a point. They had a good point. 

“Does it…look better?” You asked nervously, your hand moving up to touch your hair carefully before Satoru batted it away and chided you for trying to mess with his good work.

You glared at him, knowing full well your gaze had lost its heat, and he just chuckled.

“Your hair looks beautiful as always, Y/n chan, I just helped improve it,” he soothed you, waving his hand with a silly grin.

You bit your lip, averting your gaze.

“I guess it’s just different from what I remember.”

He hummed noncommittally. Then he opened the door wide, waving his other hand to motion you to go first. The crooked smile resting on his face at that moment did not leave your mind all night.

—

“You’re such a chicken, Yn-cha,” Satoru teased.

You gasped, offended. “Am not!”

He poked your cheek with a soft chuckle. “Such a chicken!”

You batted his hand away, contemplating for a second if you should just bite it. You had quickly noticed that Satoru drove one to measurements like those. Would you ever consider biting anyone else’s hand? No, not in a million years. But the man was so infuriating sometimes it just awoke this urge in you.

Satoru grinned like he knew exactly what you had thought, wiggling his fingers in the air between you as if to dare you to do it. Sometimes it really seemed like he could read your mind. You blamed it on your apparently close friendship before the whole amnesia thing. 

When you didn’t actually attempt to sink your teeth into his skin he let his hand fall to the side and stuck out his tongue. You punched his arm with a huff, leading him to let out a dramatic whine.

You couldn’t believe you actually liked this dork. It was still a mystery to you, even now that you’ve finally accepted your fate. After the not-date, it was hard not to. The night wasn’t very eventful, you had only visited a little ice cream parlour and walked around the city a little. 

Satoru had been an absolute menace and dragged you into all kinds of souvenir shops – like he didn’t live here in Tokyo…

But he’d been funny and charming despite everything. He had opened doors for you and had insisted you linked your arms together. “So I don’t lose you,” he had joked but it had sent butterflies fluttering through your stomach regardless. You had even ended up sharing a milkshake because Satoru had insisted. 

It had felt like a date. It really had. But it couldn’t have been. Satoru would have told you. If there was anything going on between the two of you he would tell you. He wouldn’t keep something as big as you two being in a relationship to himself. Amnesia rules be damned. 

But even if it wasn’t a date, it had only made you understand 26-year-old you’s affection towards him more. How were you meant to not fall in love with Satoru if that was how he treated you all the time?

Didn’t mean you could let him know about that, though. 

The man was still pestering you, digging his finger into your side and making you squeal and squirm away.

“Come on, tell me,” he urged you with a whine, “Who is the better-looking sorcerer? Me, and you know you want to tell me, you have to  follow your heart, or boring businessman Nanami?”

Yeah…that was what Satoru has been annoying you about for the last five minutes on your way to Shoko’s office. Five minutes. And only because you had passed Nanami on your way there and Satoru had noticed your eyes following the man after he had nodded politely at you in greeting and given Satoru a deadpan stare before he walked past you. 

Since then Satoru was relentless in his quest to find out if you thought Nanami was more attractive than him because well…Satoru was a menace. And his ego was apparently very fragile. 

“And I told you, I cannot answer this question honestly because your ego wouldn’t survive the fall, now cut it out, you big baby,” you teased him and pushed his hand away.

Satoru shook his head, not ready to give up yet. If the shit-eating grin on his face was anything to go by. 

“You’re such a chicken, Yn-chan. You’re just too embarrassed to admit how attractive you think I am. You think I’m gorgeous. It’s okay to admit I am the most handsome guy you’ve ever seen.”

You rolled your eyes, hating that he was right. Nanami was a very attractive man. Unfortunately, you’ve found yourself more drawn to pretty men with gorgeous eyes and annoying personalities and an ego the size of all of Tokyo. Skill issue on your part.

“Sure, that’s it,” you deadpanned and Satoru hummed with delight.

“Admitting this takes strength, I know.” He gave a solemn nod and reached to pat your shoulder but you shoved him and sent him stumbling to the side, laughing.

You had to hide your smile.

You arrived at Shoko’s office only a little bit later. Satoru knocked but barely waited until the woman told them to come in before pushing the door open and sticking his head through the gap, giving a cheerful greeting.

You heard Shoko groan before being dragged into the office by Satoru, his grip around your shoulder as he pulled you in front of him. The woman’s features softened at your sight, the lines in her forehead smoothing out again. You waved at her with a small smile, understanding the annoyance Satoru was able to awaken in people. 

“I’ll leave them in your hands,” Satoru announced, grabbing both your shoulders and pushing you forward like a mother presenting her child.

“They’re not a child, you idiot,” Shoko sighed.

The man’s only reply was a smile, as he patted your shoulders innocently. You glared at him and called him a jerk and Satoru laughed. Before he finally let go of you again he gave your shoulders a squeeze as if to ensure you he’d be back, then he retracted towards the door. 

“Remember! No memory discussion! Alright, bye. I’ll pick you up in an hour.” He waved at both of you before slipping out of the office and closing the door behind him.

“I feel like I was just handed off to daycare,” you sighed and Shoko snickered. 

“He’s very protective of you.” She said it in a voice that sounded neither like she was excusing his behaviour nor like she was scolding him.  “Could be less annoying about it, though.” 

You hummed in agreement, taking a seat on the small sofa in the corner of the room. Shoko watched you quietly from where she was sitting behind her desk, tapping her fingers against the wood.

“I can imagine you’re getting frustrated by being asked this so much, but do you remember anything yet?”

You sighed, having expected that question. It’s been almost a month, after all. You knew that this was probably going on longer than any of them had expected. “No? I mean. Other than a few deja vus, if that counts.”

She nodded, staring thoughtfully at the screen of her computer. 

“Any other symptoms? Headaches? Nausea? Blackouts? Any physical pain? More tired than usual? Numbness?”

You shook your head, a small smile on your lips. “No, Doctor, no other symptoms.”

Shoko blinked, looking taken aback. Her eyes darted back towards you, then she burst out into quiet laughter. 

You frowned, confused.

“You’re still calling me out even without your memories,” She mused to herself when she calmed down, “Can’t help it, really.”

You leaned back into the cushions of the couch, feeling warm at the sound of Shoko’s laugh. For some reason, you felt incredibly pleased. 

“So you do this a lot then. Turn on the doctor mode,” you asked her with a teasing tone, wondering if you could get any information out of her without Satoru being around to shush her.

She rolled her eyes. 

“You complain about me mothering you too much when you get sick. But wouldn’t have to if you weren’t such a difficult patient.” 

You lightened up, grinning. “Mh, yeah, I like to ignore my illnesses until they go away.”

Shoko gave you an unimpressed look, seemingly displeased by how unashamed you were about it. You just shrugged. The woman decided to let it go, only muttering something to herself you couldn’t hear from the distance but were sure was about you being a brat. 

“Has Satoru been pestering you a lot about the memory thing? I bet he is, that idiot.”

Your smile fell. 

“No, actually, he barely asks about it,” you admitted, your eyes falling to your lap. “I feel like he’s pretending to be less bothered by it than he actually is.”

“Oh?” Shoko asked, but she didn’t sound surprised by your observation at all. 

You narrowed your eyes at her. “You know.”

“Why Satoru is holding you at arm’s length? Take a guess.”

“I don’t know. I barely know him.”

Shoko shook her head, raising an eyebrow at you. 

“You know him quite well. You just don’t remember. At least consciously.”

You frowned, sitting up. “What do you mean?”

Shoko leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms, regarding you with a calm gaze. 

“You said you were having deja vus?”

You nodded, telling her about when you had called Satoru by his first name for the first time and the feeling you’ve had when the man had pulled off his glasses and showed you his eyes. How you’d felt like it hadn’t been the first time. 

That last part brought an amused smile to the women’s lips. “Of course, he’d try to copy that.”

You perked up at her words. “So that did happen before!”

Shoko hummed. “Which just proves my suspicions. Subconsciously you still remember the past six years.” She raised her hand and motioned towards you. “You instinctively know how to engage with your environment and with the people you are close friends with. You recognise familiar situations and you still seem to feel the same way towards us. You just fail to consciously access your memories.”

You frowned, not quite understanding what the woman was saying. Were feelings connected to memories? Could you being in love with Satoru be a sign that your memories weren’t as removed as you had first suspected? 

Shoko, who noticed your confusion, explained further, “Y/n, I remember when you first got here. It took you months until you opened up to us more and started warming up to Satoru. Even though you are now affected by amnesia you didn’t revert back to that state. You still act as you did a month ago before you lost your memories.”

So the loss of memories wasn’t really the issue, you just couldn’t access them.

“So…what do you think I should do?”

She shrugged. “Trust your instincts.”

You sighed. Right. Your instincts. Like you could trust them when they were so ridden with your wistful yearning. What if you told Shoko that your instincts were screaming at you to wrap your arms around Satoru, bury your head in his chest and stay there? That your instincts were screaming at you to grab his face and kiss him. That your instincts were telling you that the two of you should be dating and that it was unfair how you were stuck with those feelings instead of 26-year-old you who actually knew how to deal with them.

Shoko clicked her tongue and let out a snort, making you look up with panic. Had you said any of that out loud?

“What?”

She shook her head. “I can’t believe that jerk pulled the eye move but not that stupid hand thing with Infinity on you.”

“Infinity?” you questioned, feeling like the word felt familiar to you. 

“It’s one of his curse techniques.” Shoko looked up to the ceiling, pursing her lips.

Then she started to explain to you, as simply as possible, what Infinity was and how it worked. You listened to her with wide eyes, feeling yourself grow a little dizzy. 

“Infinity?” You echoed.

“Infinity.” Shoko repeated again, raising an eyebrow at your pale face. “I know you don’t remember anymore but there is no need to look so terrified.”

“So no one…can touch him?” 

“Without his permission, yes. The jerk turns it off sometimes when he pleases.” She rolled her eyes.

At your silence she turns to you, a frown twisted her face. “What is wrong?”

“I just…we’re kind of touching all the time.”

Shoko gave you a look and you blushed, cheeks exploding in warmth. That sounded…not like you had wanted it to sound.

“No…not like that, it’s just- casual, I guess. But…”

Shoko grinned. “I see.” Then she burst out into laughter.

You felt yourself blushing even more, lips jutting out in a pout. “What’s so funny?”

“The asshole always turns it off around you. It’s probably subconscious at this point.”

You blinked. “He does?”

Shoko lifted a brow, giving you an amused look. “Surprised?”

“I- of course!”

Why wouldn’t you be? You wouldn’t put it past Satoru to turn on Infinity whenever you hit his arm or shove him just to annoy you.  

Shoko just shrugged, eyes twinkling with mirth as she told you, “Some motivation to remember I guess.”

“Shoko!” You whined.

The woman just chuckled again. “You could try to surprise him. Touch him when he doesn’t suspect it. Just to test the theory.”

Yeah…maybe you’d do that. 

—

You sighed, watching Satoru empty the bowl of rock candy you’d just restocked the other day, grabbing a handful of them before throwing himself back down on the couch. Your eyes followed his fingers as he skillfully unwrapped each candy with one hand before Satoru stuffed them into his mouth. He hummed appreciatively every time. 

You couldn’t believe a 26-year-old you was so desperately in love with him to be indulging this behaviour. 

“I didn’t stock them up just for you to eat all of it within a day.” 

Satoru turned his head a little in your direction but his glasses were hiding his intended side-eye. 

“But you got them for me, didn’t you?” 

He grinned as you stayed silent, knowing he’s seen right through you.

“You’re so sweet, Y/n-chan.” 

You huffed. “Shut up. Who says I got them for you?”

“You’re allergic and as you’ve said before I am the only one who’s shown up to your apartment the past few weeks. Who else would you get them for?”

You leaned back in the chair, eyes resting on the bowl on your desk. “My secret boyfriend obviously.”

Satoru hummed. “I thought you came to the conclusion he didn’t exist.”

You bit your lips, glad he has turned with his back towards you again so he couldn’t see your conflicted expression. Maybe you’d just come to the conclusion that you wished Satoru was the secret boyfriend…

You couldn’t stop thinking about that conversation Shoko and you had had that day. About Satoru’s distance, about your lingering feelings despite the memory ‘loss’ and about Infinity. Especially that last part hadn’t left you any peace. What reason was there for Satoru to shut it off around you? Even when you threatened him with your chopsticks? Or was it just another amnesia rule? Did he want you to remember Infinity by yourself?

You frowned, eyes gazing towards his seat on the couch. He was still happily munching on his candy, his back exposed to you.

What had Shoko said? You should try to test him by touching him when he didn’t expect it? This way he couldn’t just shut it off at the last moment. This way you’d know for sure if he automatically disabled it around you.

Your fingers itched and you balled your hands into fists to stop yourself from tapping them against your thighs. You were sitting close enough that if you leaned forward you would be able to touch him. He was still busy with the candy, making happy noises.

Your eyes zoned in on the uncovered patch of skin on his neck, a pale stripe peeking out between his hair and his collar. 

Satoru made a questioning sound in the back of his throat and you realised he was still expecting an answer. 

“How do I know you’re not just keeping him away from me? Maybe it’s just another one of your amnesia rules.” You tried to joke, keeping your voice steady. 

He snickered, shoulders shaking as his head fell forwards a little, exposing even more skin of his neck.

You stared at it, feeling your heartbeat out of your chest.

“Though I definitely have the power to do that I don’t think-”

You pushed your finger against the skin of Satoru’s neck.

The man stopped, neither flinching nor moving away. He just waited.

Your eyes went wide, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your finger. He hadn’t activated Infinity. He couldn’t even have known that you would touch him. Your mind was reeling.

“Sorry, you-uh-there…there was a hair!” You yelled out, voice rising an octave, as you swiped your finger down his skin to pretend like you were brushing it away.

Then you quickly snatched your hand away.

“I see. Thank you.” Satoru’s tone was unreadable again. And he still didn’t turn around.

Not that it would have helped ease your mind to see his expression, not when the glasses were hiding his true feelings by covering his eyes. 

“Of course.” You laughed awkwardly, now wanting nothing more than to bend forward and press your lips to the spot you had just touched. 

You shock yourself out of that thought. Get a grip.

You cleared your throat. “So you have… the power to keep my secret boyfriend away, huh?”

It was meant to lighten the mood, maybe get rid of the sudden tension you felt between the two of you. But Satoru stayed quiet for a while.

“I’m the strongest.” He said it like it was a fact and for some reason, you didn’t doubt him. 

You smiled. “Maybe he’d get very upset if he found out you ate all his candy and would try to fight you.”

“I’d win,” Satoru insisted, finally turning around to look at you, a smirk lifting the corner of his lips. 

And then with one smooth move, he bent over the back of the couch and snatched the bowl of rock candy from your desk. You gasped, watching in shock as the man dug his hand in the contents and fished out even more candy than he had before.

You jumped up, reaching for the bowl.

“Give it to me.”

“Nope.” Satoru laughed, holding his hand out of your reach.

You bent over the back of the couch, stabilising yourself on his shoulder as you climbed half over the backrest, Satoru’s laughter filling the air with your annoyed yells.

“Satoru stop being a little shit. I just bought these. That’s way too much sugar for you.”

You reached over him, catching his wrist and almost losing balance and falling but were able to catch yourself in the last moment, luckily not smashing your foreheads together in the process. Wait…foreheads?

You froze, hands still holding his wrist as you realized that you were now sitting in Satoru’s lap. 

Like actually sitting in Satoru’s lap. Butt on thighs. Sitting. 

You…what? 

You couldn’t move, you tried to will yourself to do something. Anything. But your body didn’t respond, too overwhelmed that you were sitting on Satoru’s lap. 

The man looked unbothered, eyes twinkling with mischief as your cheeks exploded with heat and you kind of wanted to slap him because what the fuck? 

You let go of his wrists and quickly tried to move back and out of his lap but had to have Satoru save you from losing balance and almost falling backwards in your attempts. Which he did by grabbing your waist with his hands and pulling you back in his lap, letting go of the candy still in his hand. The sound of them clattering to the floor filled the following silence. 

“Careful,” he chided you, voice playful. 

You stared at him, eyes darting between the dark lenses of his sunglasses and across his face as you tried to work out what was happening. 

“See something you like?” he teased, hands still comfortably resting on your waist.

That’s what you noticed suddenly. He hadn’t let go of you. No, he was keeping you in his lap, like he wanted you there. And what he just said…was he flirting? 

Seriously flirting? 

You reached forward, not knowing what possessed you as your fingers traced the frames of Satoru’s glasses before softly plucking them from his face. The man didn’t stop you. He remained still, unblinkingly staring up at you with those blue eyes that mirrored the sky. You folded the glasses absentmindedly and clipped them to his shirt before your hand reached for his face again. The cap of your finger brushed the skin of his cheek, barely able to notice the softness of it when you came back to yourself. What the fuck were you doing.

You reeled back, almost falling out of Satoru’s lap again if it wasn’t for the man’s grip around you.

“Why are you fighting it?” His voice was suddenly serious.

You blinked, overwhelmed by what had just happened, what was still happening.

“Fighting what?” You breathed out, flexing your fingers in his grip.

Without much explanation, he pulled your hand back to its previous position a few inches away from his face before letting go again.

“Trust your instincts and stop fighting them, otherwise your memories will never return.”

You swallowed.

“What if it’s not instincts?”

He cocked his head. You didn’t continue your sentence.

What if it was merely your feelings for him? What if you messed things up for 26-year-old you?

Gojo sighed, shoulders falling and for a second you saw disappointment fleet through his gaze before it was replaced with a feigned expression of amusement.

“You’re such a chicken.”

He straightened up and you realised that he was letting you go, that you could get out of his lap now. Instead, you did something stupid. 

You grabbed his face with both of your hands and waited long enough to see him perk up in surprise, eyes wide as they stared up at you, and then you leaned down to press your lips against his. 

Satoru didn’t even wait until your lips were fully connected before he pushed forward, head tilting until your mouths could slot together perfectly. Something in your chest fluttered as he pulled you closer against him, your chests being pressed together. You gasped into his mouth. He used that opportunity to deepen the kiss, slipping his tongue past your lips and you followed his guidance, letting yourself sink into the sensation. You shuddered against him, overwhelmed with the feeling of him but at the same time, it felt normal…a little bit like you were coming home.

You both pulled back to catch your breath, not moving far away, noses still close enough to almost touch. This was insane. You couldn’t help staring at him, his eyes looked so bright and a little crazy. You just noticed how impossibly blue they were. Bluer than the sky even, like they contained a whole other universe in them.

You swallowed, tongue darting out to wet your tingling lips, the taste of sugar lingering there.  You didn’t pay any attention to it, too distracted by the excitement that bloomed in your chest when Satoru’s eyes darted down to follow the moment. 

A laugh bubbled past your throat at the absurdity of it all. Only yesterday you wouldn’t have thought it possible that Satoru would let you kiss him, much less kiss you back. That you’d been sitting here in his lap, all because of…well…

“You deactivated it.” Your voice was barely above a whisper. 

“Mh?” 

“When I touched your neck. Infinity.”

His eyes widened, finding yours. “You remember that?”

You gave his cheek an apologetic squeeze, “Shoko told me.”

He visibly deflated. “So you still remember nothing?”

Yeah…there was still that. Your memories. You swallowed, eyes darting down to his lips again and you remembered what Shoko had told you. What Satoru had just told you. You have to trust your instincts.

“I can’t tell if it’s a memory or more of a feeling. But I think we’ve kissed before.”

“Oh yeah?” Satoru teased, visibly brightening up again. 

“Satoru.” 

He hummed, fingers squeezing your waist as he pulled you closer against him. Your thumb brushed his cheek and your noses brushed. 

“Do feelings count as memories?”

Satoru lifted an eyebrow.

“You’re getting philosophical with me.”

You softly pinched his cheek.

“Would you let me kiss you again?”

His eyebrow quirked up. “Would that help with your memories?”

“Would you let me even if it didn’t?” You whispered, already leaning closer. 

“Are you asking these questions to figure me out or because you want to kiss me?” he asked, but his voice sounded hoarse and you could tell that he wanted you to kiss him just as badly as you wanted to kiss him.

“I’m following my instincts,” You muttered and leaned back in to connect your lips again.

Yeah. This was like coming home. 

—

After that afternoon you became bolder. Pulling Satoru down for kisses, reaching to hold his hand, sitting close enough your legs were touching, snuggling up to him when you were watching a movie. 

To your pleasant surprise the man was accepting your touches with ease, Infinity still shut off around you. You didn’t talk about it at first, happy to just enjoy this new but somehow familiar dynamic you had. But there was really just one explanation for this. 

“We’re dating.” 

Your statement didn’t seem to surprise Satoru at the very least.

“Is that a question or a statement?” he mused, not even turning around as he prepared your food at the counter of your kitchen.

You closed the distance between the both of you and slung your arms around him, testing, and just like you’d expected, he let you. Not just that, it almost felt like he was leaning into your touch.

“I’m pretty confident,” you hummed, tightening your grip and pressing your face into his side.

“You’re remembering?” Satoru asked but he didn’t sound convinced.

You scrunched your face. “Did I ask you out?”

Satoru tensed and peaked down at you, eyes narrowed suspiciously. 

“Are you guessing?”

You grinned. “I asked you out but you kissed me first.”

His eyes widened. “Y/n…”

Your grin softened into a smile at his hopeful eyes. 

“It’s not really remembering, I think. It just…feels right. It’s like I just know it.”

He sighed, reaching out to twirl your hair between his fingers. 

“Are you even trying?” He sounded so whiny. It made you giggle again.

“You’re such a jerk. Why didn’t you just tell me we were dating?”

“You need to remember yourself for the curse to wear off,” he justified, but then admitted what you had already suspected, “It was also very funny to watch you squirm and be all flustered around me. You were so embarrassed for wanting to see my eyes.” He giggled to himself. “And to hear about that secret boyfriend of yours you buy those candies for was very entertaining. “

You rolled your eyes. “And you were that secret boyfriend the whole time.”

Discarding the food at the counter the man turned around in your grip so he could sling his arms around you as well. He rested his head on top of yours.

“You never told me you were allergic.”

You shrugged. “You would have made fun of me for being so smitten with you.”

“Because you are! You love me so much!” he sing-sang, rocking you in his arms, making you laugh. 

“Yeah, I do,” you agreed softly.

taglist:

@crystal-lilac @duf3h6237 @hufflefluffslytherin @chucky-26o1 @lordbugs @patchi-chi @chewymoustachio @enesitamor @yourbloodyqueen @lady-cryptstone @iwatobiswimbros @kite11 @kurookinnie @spacedaddydinn @nishayuro @cinaiel @marblesphere @zhah-zu @olaf9086 @oriontingz @bloobrryktty

[divine-knight-hand]

Now, You’re Mine

Loki Masterlist || Full Masterlist || Read on AO3

Pairing: Loki x Female Reader

Summary: A competitive sparring session leads to spicy times with Loki.

Content Warnings: Little bits of fluff, Loki does a fair amount of mind reading, Soft Dom!Loki, Sub!Reader, oral (f. receiving), p in v (missionary), unprotected sex, a touch of cockwarming, and explicit consent

Notes: I originally wrote this for sarahscribbles’s Birthday Celebration before I went in a completely different direction and decided to write and contribute Worshiping the Masterpiece instead. Even though this didn’t end up as my official contribution, I figured I’d still finish it and post it for you all.

It was honestly a little daunting. This was definitely a difficult write for me, and there were times where I thought I wouldn’t finish it. Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy what I came up with!

Since this was originally for the Birthday Celebration, I had used some of the listed prompts for this work. The prompt that sparked the writing of this was "Is that a threat or a promise?", but I also snuck in the fluff prompt “Are you really so oblivious?”. What can I say? I’m an overachiever in all things where writing is concerned. Hehehe!

Word Count: 3,781

Dividers by @cafekitsune

“Umph!” With a flick of his wrist, Loki sent me tumbling to the floor once again.

Once every week, Loki and I sparred in the training room of the tower so I could practice fighting more powerful opponents. I figured that I would eventually sharpen my skills and prove useful on more intense missions. Unfortunately, I typically did more falling on my own ass than actual sparring, so I haven’t improved much since we first started.

Against my better judgment, I slammed my fists on the padded floor. “Son of a bitch!”

“Is that frustration I sense, agent?” Loki stood across the room from me, clearly entertained by my lack of temper. He didn’t even break a sweat, seeing as he barely had to move a muscle to defeat me. He just stood there, folding his arms behind his back as the corner of his mouth twitched upward in amusement.

I heavily sighed and slowly rose back to my feet. “No, no. I’m fine.” I dusted off my behind as I returned to where I stood right before getting knocked off my feet. “Let’s just start from the beginning… again.”

“How do you not tire of repeatedly falling before me?” He began to close the gap between us in large strides. “Though I find it rather amusing, I can’t help but wonder why you remain so persistent in the face of failure.” He stopped a few feet away from me. Too close and too far at the same time.

I scoffed. “You can condescend to me all you like, but I don’t plan on quitting until I at least manage to reach you.”

That was when it hit me. I hadn’t given much thought to my battle plan. I haven’t had the time before being thrown off balance every time. What exactly would I have done if I managed to reach him? How could I best someone who towered over me, even as I stood upright? Would I sweep him off his feet? Would I aim an attack at his perfectly chiseled face to disorient him? Would I wrap my arms around him and fall into the feel of his body against mine, desperate to never let go? Or would I just be too drunk on the air around him to even make it all the way, stuck in the stupor of my own attraction?

Get a grip! I chided myself. This is Loki, you’re thinking about! Do you honestly think he would feel the same way about you? He’s a god, for crying out loud! But I knew that. I was drawn to the danger of that feeling like a moth to a flame. There was nothing sensical about the way I felt for him, but regardless of how risky my feelings were for him, I would indulge in them.

“Condescend to you?” Loki held a hand over his heart in a show of mock hurt. “I would never. Honestly, the way you fell to the floor just now was truly remarkable. The Avengers are lucky to have you.”

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” I enunciated each dry laugh. “Very funny. Now, are we talking or training?”

Loki was unmoving, instead staring at me with an intensity that made me wonder if he could see straight through me. “You seem eager to return to our little session. Why is that?”

Wow! He’s intuitive. I thought, anxiety buzzing under my skin. But there’s no way I can answer that.

And why not? I jumped at the sound of Loki’s voice in my mind.

Too surprised to muster my own voice to speak, I formed the words in my mind. Loki? Are you in my head right now?

No, agent. I could hear him chuckle aloud as he responded. I’m right in front of you.

I physically shuddered. That is so creepy…

It’s natural to fear what you don’t understand. He raised his eyebrows at me.

“Can you cut that out?” I finally spoke up, shaking my head as if I could shake him out. “I don’t appreciate these mind games.” Nor did I appreciate the possibility that he could have heard me mentally rambling about how he truly made me feel. The thought of him having access to the secret I worked so hard to keep from him made me nauseous, so I focused on the part of me that was annoyed.

“I appear to have struck a nerve.” Loki commented matter-of-factly. “How odd. That wasn’t even my intention.”

Damnit! I thought. Why is he so good at pissing me off?

I appreciate your acknowledgment of my prowess, agent. Loki’s voice sounded in my head again. But, as I’ve said, my goal isn’t to infuriate you. I’m truly curious as to why you’re so passionate about our sessions.

“Ugh!” I threw my hands in the air. “Fine, we don’t have to spar if you’re going to ask a million questions. Just forget it. I’m done.” I turned away and began to storm off, eager to get away from the situation, and pausing only to call back, “And stop doing that talking-to-me-in-my-mind thing! It’s extremely invasive!” before continuing away.

I only took a few more steps before freezing again at the sound of Loki’s voice. “What exactly are you chasing, agent?”

Even as I faced away, standing across the room from him, I felt cornered. “What do you mean?”

“Our weekly arrangement seems to matter to you so much.” He began again. “Anyone would walk away in utter surrender after being so easily defeated the first few times. You differ. There’s a spark in your eye, and though it flickers and threatens to fade, it doesn’t extinguish. Why is that? What are you seeking to gain from facing off with me every week? What are you chasing?”

That was it. I had nowhere to run. I was completely vulnerable. I couldn’t get out of this situation without at least explaining myself to him. I just wouldn’t reveal too much.

I turned back to him, giving myself time to steel my nerves before responding. “My potential.” He cocked his head in curiosity, prompting me to continue. “Lately at work I felt… stuck.” I slowly began to make my way back over to him. “I know I can still improve, so I figured that sparring with you would make me stronger. But, now I just feel stuck fighting with you. I mean, I couldn’t even land a single hit on you. At all. I couldn’t even reach you!”

I stopped a few feet away from him and looked down at my feet in shame. “So, yes, I am a little frustrated that I’m not improving. I can’t help but feel like I’m on my way to being a failure.”

I suddenly saw a familiar pair of leather boots settle in front of my tattered sneakers before Loki tilted my chin up to face him. “I’ll hear none of that. You are not a failure. Far from it.”

My heart leapt up to my throat. Our faces were mere inches apart. Loki’s bright blue eyes kept mine glued to them like those of a hypnotizing serpent. I could almost feel our breaths intermingle between our mouths. His raven hair fell forward ever so slightly to frame his angular face as he tilted it down to focus on mine. For the first time, I saw Loki wear an expression of concern, and it was for me.

When I didn’t immediately respond, he continued, “You are more formidable than you know, agent. I never anticipated your persistence to be so drawn out, but as long as you believe you can grow, then it shall be. I will admit, I haven’t been very fair to your pursuits. Do forgive my hindering of your goals. I simply didn’t wish to let you go once you felt satisfied with what resulted from our sessions.”

My voice wavered more than I would have liked it to. “I- I don’t understand…”

“The only reason you felt stuck here was simply because I made it so.” Loki explained. “I knew that once you received the training you were working toward, you wouldn’t require my assistance anymore.”

“So, you weren’t just trying to make me look stupid?” I was genuinely surprised, especially considering the smile that graced his lips each time I hit the floor. I thought he enjoyed seeing me make a fool out of myself. I didn’t exactly hate the idea, either, if it meant I got the chance to see him smile down at me.

“Gods no!” His lips slowly spread into a grin. “Although seeing that little vein in your temple pop each time you grew agitated was quite amusing, that wasn’t my intention at all.”

“Jerk.” I breathlessly laughed, still struggling to keep my composure. I gulped, feeling his hand still on my chin. Sparks ignited under my skin where he touched me. I wanted him more and more with each passing second.

“I simply couldn’t resist.” Loki chuckled. “There’s something rather endearing within your vexation.”

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” I dryly laughed again. “But, besides you enjoying my annoyance… Why did you want me around so much? You put in a lot of effort just to keep me here.”

His voice lowered as his gaze grew intense. “Are you really so oblivious?”

My breath hitched as he seemed to grow closer to me, despite having not moved an inch. “I- I- I-”

“Darling,” He cut off my useless stuttering. “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to ensure you remain by my side. Your presence is invaluable to me.”

Is this really happening? I felt myself growing redder by the second. I couldn’t believe it. Was this Loki’s way of telling me that he loved me?

Curiosity got the better of me, and I decided that making my own confession would help me know for sure. “Loki… I feel the same way. That’s why I asked you specifically for help. I did really want help, but I also wanted to see you more often. Work doesn’t really let us cross paths as much as it used to. Now that I know what it’s like to exist with you, I can’t imagine a life without you.”

His lip twitched up into another smile. “I’m glad we can agree.”

Then, he leaned in and kissed me. It was a short and sweet kiss, but once I wrapped my arms around the back of his neck, he deepened the kiss, slipping his dexterous tongue into my eager mouth. Oh my god! Pinch me, I must be dreaming.

No, darling. Loki’s voice sounded in my mind, and I happily welcomed it this time. This is as real as you are.

I felt my stomach flutter with excitement. This was real! I loved him and he loved me. I was so excited, I gained enough confidence to slide my hands into his hair, holding his face to mine. I felt that if he let me go, I would have nothing left to anchor my soul to my body. I willed our kiss to last as long as possible.

When we finally broke for air, I breathlessly giggled. “I guess it’s safe to say we don’t need to spar to spend time with each other anymore.”

“Oh, my darling pet.” He purred, sending a tremor down my spine. “I don’t need a training session to indulge in the luxury of seeing you fall before me.”

I instantly felt arousal pooling between my thighs at his comment. “Is that a threat or a promise?”

“It’s a guarantee.” He growled before effortlessly sweeping me off my feet—no magic required—and speeding out of the training room with me in his arms. I lightly giggled all the way, allowing myself to fall into in the feel of his touch and the mischievous glint in his eyes.

══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══

We practically crashed through the door of his bedroom as we were locked in a mess of kissing and touching. We stumbled into the room as Loki just barely managed to slam the door behind him. He finally pulled me away from him and tossed me onto his bed. I fell onto my back with a very unflattering “Umph!” before propping myself up on my forearms to look back at him.

“There you are.” His mouth curved up into a sly smirk. “Fallen before me, just as I knew you would be.” I felt the beating of my heart quicken at his words.

There was something new about the look in his eyes. Something ravenous. His hair was ruffled from the way I ran my hands in it as we kissed, and his pupils were blown with lust, just barely rimmed by the usual electric blue color of his eyes.

“I must have you now.” His voice grew husky as he spoke to me. “Are you willing to give yourself to me tonight?”

“Loki,” My words were just barely over a whisper. “I’m willing to give myself to you, always.”

Then, a charged silence hung between us, and I felt Loki’s eyes possessively scour over my body. My skin was aflame and I felt my panties growing wet with my dripping arousal as the time passed.

I silently looked him over as well, my eyes trailing down his sharp cheekbones and jawline, and the leather draped over his towering frame, before freezing at the monstrous bulge forming between his legs. I mindlessly spread my own at the sight of it.

“You look absolutely ravishing, darling.” He finally broke the silence. “I can tell you hunger for me the same way I do for you. Let’s not waste another minute, hm?”

“Yes,” I breathlessly whispered. “Please.”

“Begging already?” Loki’s mouth cracked into a mischievous grin. “I’ve barely touched you, my dear.” He let out a low playful chuckle before he leaned in to push me back down onto his bed.

We kissed again, and even as my eyes were closed, I could see the green flash of Loki’s seidr before I felt a fresh draft over my body. He pulled away, and I opened my eyes to see that he was equally bare. My breath hitched as my eyes traveled down his body, taking in each inch of his beautifully toned figure. Between us, hung his large, throbbing cock. I wanted to reach out and trace each bulging vein with my fingers.

I let out the breath I forgot I was holding as my gaze returned to Loki’s eyes. “You’re gorgeous.”

“Oh, darling~” Loki purred before trailing kisses down my neck and breasts.

“Mmm, Loki,” I sighed. “I want you so badly.”

He settled between my legs with a devilish grin, propping them up on his shoulders. “Oh, how it excites me to hear you say that.” He began trailing kisses up my inner thigh. “You’re already so wet for me… Mmm, I can’t wait to taste you.” He lightly nipped my inner thigh, eliciting a small yelp from me before teasing his tongue at my entrance. “How divine~” His last words were a soft whisper against my cunt. I almost didn’t hear them. Almost.

I let out a soft moan as Loki continued to tease me. “Mmm, Loki… Please… More…”

“More?” He playfully tutted. “We’re needy tonight, aren’t we?”

“Only for you~” I mewled.

A deep growl rumbled from the back of his throat. “It would do you well to remember that.”

He licked an agonizingly slow stripe up my dripping cunt before deepening the work of his tongue, adding his fingers to circle my clit as he did.

“Ah- Loki! Mmm…” My back arched, and I resisted the urge to grind against the friction he was giving me. “Yes- Ohhh, that feels so good…” The transition from a little stimulation to a lot almost made me dizzy. I could have gotten drunk on that feeling.

Loki just hummed in satisfaction as he tightly gripped my hip with his free hand. I knew his fingers would bruise my skin, but I didn’t care. I was focused on the pressure mounting in my core, and how rapidly I was hurtling towards my peak. Bruises and body aches would be a tomorrow problem.

I gripped the sheets beneath me, trying to find something to anchor me to the moment as my quickly approaching finish threatened to carry me away from this plane of existence. As it would turn out, my anchor wasn’t the feel of the sheets between my fingers. It was the sight of Loki’s head bobbing between my thighs as he greedily ate me out, accompanied by the lewd slurping sounds that emanated from the act.

“Loki…” I all but squeaked. “Getting- Ah! C- close…”

He gave my hip an affectionate squeeze, keeping his pace on my aching cunt. Just a moment later, my eyes rolled back, and I came with a moan that nearly rattled the bedroom walls.

Loki slowed, but never stopped, helping me ride out my high before finally coming up to wipe his face on the back of his hand. My legs tingled as they slid off of his shoulders, and I could barely feel them as he climbed back to face-level with me.

“I’ve waited so long for this moment, pet.” He lifted a hand to cup my cheek as he kissed me, and I could taste myself on his tongue. While we kissed, he dragged the length of his throbbing cock between my folds.

When we broke for air, a string of saliva momentarily connecting our mouths, I was left panting. “Loki, please, I need you inside me.”

“Is that so?” He began to slowly stroke his length as he lined himself up with my entrance. “Tell me how much you need me. I want to hear it from you.”

“Loki, I-” I instinctively bucked my hips, desperate for more friction, as his tip teased my folds. “Please… Please, I need you so much. Ah- I’ve been dying for you!”

He pulled me into another kiss, our mouths crashing together as he finally began to slide inside. We moaned into each other’s mouths, and my hands found their way to his back. When I bucked my hips, he tightly gripped them, stopping me from rushing into bottoming out.

I was wet enough for him to slide in easily, but the excruciatingly slow pace he took nearly brought me to tears of frustration. He finally bottomed out, and I felt my walls clench around him as the full sensation registered in my core.

He pulled away from our kiss, cheeks glowing pink under a light sheen of sweat. “Mmm, you take me so well.” I felt my cheeks lightly blush at his praise. “Are you ready, love?”

“More than ready.” I breathed. I wasn’t sure how I was managing to speak as pleasure seemed to be slowly taking over each of my senses.

Loki buried his face in my neck, softly groaning as he began to trail kisses down my neck. “You are more formidable than you know, agent.” He sucked on the sweet spot on my neck, leaving another mark on my body before continuing. “You managed to penetrate the innermost walls of a god’s heart.” His voice was laced with both the most innocent love and filthy seduction. “Now, I shall never have my fill of you, but I will always return to you for more.”

He slowly slid out of me, leaving just the tip of his cock inside of me before ramming his hips back into mine, setting a brutal pace. I let out a loud moan, my voice clipping with each snap of his hips as my back arched off of the bed.

In response to his beautiful declaration, I could only manage to speak one word. “Pr- Promise?”

Loki dragged his warm tongue up my face, stopping by my ear to murmur. “I guarantee it.” The brush of his lips against my ear sent a shiver down my spine, adding to the immense amounts of pleasure I was experiencing.

I squeezed my eyes shut and raked my fingernails down his back, earning a deep growl from the god on top of me.

“How could you be the death of me- Mmm… and my whole life- Ah- at the same time?” I hesitantly opened my eyes to see Loki’s wildly looking into mine.

His hair dropped to surround both of our faces in dark curtains. Loki was all I could see, all I could smell, and all I could feel. The fire burning under my skin served, not as a distraction, but a reminder of the sensations he was able to create in me. As his calculated thrusts grew just the littlest bit sloppy, I could tell he was getting close, and that fact only brought me to my own peak faster.

“Loki…” I whimpered, struggling to voice my warning.

“I know, darling.” He breathed. “Let go. I’ve got you.”

Suddenly, I was seeing white as Loki helped me ride out my second orgasm of the night. As the waves of pleasure coursed through me, I was faintly aware of his cock twitching as its seed spilled inside me. We both let out moans that bordered on screams before coming down from our shared high.

As we both took a moment to catch our breaths, I wrapped my arms around Loki, holding his body against mine. I could feel him still inside me, our combined spent slowly dripping out, and I didn’t want him to move just yet.

“Mmm, darling…” Loki hummed as he buried his face in my neck. “You’re truly remarkable.”

I breathlessly chuckled. “You flatter me with that silver tongue of yours.”

“Really?” I felt Loki’s impish smile as it formed against my neck. “I seem to recall doing something else with it merely moments ago.”

“Alright, alright.” I couldn’t help smiling at his filthy comment. “I’ll give you that one.”

“Allow me to clean you up.” He offered.

Before I could form the words to protest anything that involved me having to move apart from him, he waved his hand, and his seidr once again bathed us in green light.

Rather than the sweat we worked up in bed, we smelled like fresh lavender soap. Though Loki’s cock was still inside me, I no longer felt our cum dripping out.

“Wow,” I reached up and gave his head an appreciative scratch. “You’re just full of surprises.”

Loki just hummed in content, softly kissing my neck until I found it difficult to keep my eyes open. Just before I fell to the lull of sleep, I heard his voice, low and sultry, in my mind.

Now, you’re mine.

[darnell-la]

Toxic Kooks get what they want.

word count: 2.1k

paring: dark!Rafe Cameron x Reader x dark!Topper

warning: cnc, dark content, rough face fucking, public cnc, hair pulling, gagging, humiliation, etc.

note: If you do not like anything that involves SA/CNC, do not continue, and do not think differently about the stories you like that we post. We have different authors on this page. We apologize if this is disappointing.

This is a mini-series as well so like, comment, and repost if you guys would like a part two!!!!!!

I DO NOT CONSENT TO OUR WORK BEING TAKEN.

————————————————————————

3rd person pov 

Living the life of a Pogues is hard. Especially when you only catch feelings for Kooks. There’s only one type of Kook and those are the ones y/n recommends no one falls for. The cocky and stuck up Kooks. 

You see, y/n used to lead Rafe on. She wasn’t sure about what she wanted you to do until she realized that he was not for her. 

He’s argued too much about not being able to have sex with her, or even touch her. She wasn’t ready for someone like Rafe to touch her. They usually leave after they get what they want. 

It became an everyday argument, so she decided to stop talking to him. That’s when she started talking to JJ. Rafe grew mad and threatened her through social media and even at parties or whenever he saw her. 

Scotlynn's pov

“Are you scared yet?” JJ asked as John B parked in front of the outside movie theater. “I love scary movies, JJ. I keep saying this,” I playfully rolled my eyes, knowing he’s the one who’s actually scared. 

“Well see when you ask me or Pope to sing you a bedtime story, later tonight,” JJ joked as we all laughed. “Ha ha, very funny,” I said as we all got out of the car to make our way to the best spot on the grass before the Kooks got here and took up space. 

Me and JJ continued poking fun at each other as we grabbed our things to set up in the grass. JJ offered to carry most of my things, and I let him. He’s been trying to get at me and I’ve been accepting it. 

I’ve caught myself staring at him a lot recently. I’ve also felt like I couldn’t go a day without seeing him. I hope he hadn’t noticed, but it’s pretty obvious I like him back. Probably more than I think I do. 

“When a man’s around you, you shouldn’t be paying, y/n,” JJ said as he gave the lady who gave me my food, some cash. I put my wallet away with a sigh because he knows I hate when people pay for me. 

“Don’t worry. You can pay me back with a date. How about that?” He basically asked me out, making me smile. “Fine, but only because I have to pay you back,” I rolled my eyes as he chuckled. 

JJ and I walked back to the group and began to eat and talk before the movie started. JJ was already scared but accused me of being scared, so he pulled me into him. Now we’re cuddling, and Sarah’s smirking at me from the side. 

After several sips of my drink, I decided I had to use the restroom. “I’ll be right back,” I whispered to JJ as I slowly got up and ducked through people sitting down in their areas so I wouldn’t disrupt the movie too much for them. 

I quickly made my way through the big parking lot and to the bathroom, I didn’t know was this far. I hate when people put bathrooms far away from outside movie theaters. Anything can happen. 

I quickly went into the mini bathroom building and did my business. I flushed and washed my hands, then fixed myself up in the mirror, hoping to look more presentable to JJ when I came back. 

“I should have brought gum with me,” I said to myself as I made my way toward the front door of the restrooms. I opened the door, just to meet Rafe and Topper waiting outside of it. 

“Jesus Christ. What now, Rafe?” I asked, annoyed that he always finds a way to catch me alone. “Date with JJ Maybank? Really, y/n? Couldn’t get any lower than that?” Rafe asked, seeming upset for absolutely no reason at all as always. 

“What does that have to do with you? I’ve never dated you, and even if I do, I can do whatever I want now since I’m single. Now, piss off,” I said then went to pass him, but he got in my way. 

“Topper, don’t tell me he got you into this. Sarah is literally one of my closest friends. She’d be upset,” I said, hoping Topper would talk Rafe out of this like usual. 

“That line won’t work anymore, princess. He’s on my side. Especially after the deal I offered him. It’s hard to say no to it,” Rafe said as he tilted his head to get a look-up sundress I was wearing. 

“You’re sick, Rafe. Sick in the fucking head,” I said, then rolled my eyes and went to take a different way out of this mess until Topper got in my way, which is very surprising. 

“Don’t, y/n,” he said, sounding slightly threatening, but I didn’t care. I didn’t catch it too fast. “Topper, don’t fuck with me, okay? I’ll have Sarah on your ass, and I know how much you hate that shit. Now get out of my way,” I went to walk past again but he slightly pushed me back with a chuckle. 

“All the times I’ve helped you out of his situations. All the times I prevented something from happening, and you still give me that bitchy attitude. Shows how much of an ignorant bitch you are,” Topper surprised me with his words. 

“Thought I was the only one who noticed,” Rafe joked, making me grow angrier. “Fuck toy both,” I said. I didn’t even get a chance to my feet before Topper gripped my neck and pulled me close to him. 

“Straighten that shit up, before I do it for you,” he threatened, surprising me even more. “Topper!” I tried yelling but his hand was too tight around my neck. He’s so strong. 

“Don’t start, y/n. I’m giving you a chance to behave and accept that someone like you, isn’t for JJ. You’re for me-“ I went to say but I quickly kicked him hard in his crotch. As soon as he let my throat go, I took off. 

“Fuck,” Rafe cussed under his breath, not wasting time to run after me. I ran through cars and around them to make more space between us, knowing he was way faster than me. He almost had me when we first started running. 

I just hit the grass, close to the people sitting down but not close enough. The movie’s too loud for them to hear me if I yell and it’s too dark for them to see me running. 

I went to try and yell until I was pulled back and my mouth was covered. “Ah uh,” Rafe said as he dragged me backwards. I kicked and screamed but they were muffled. I went to kick more aggressively but he quickly pushed me off of him, grabbed a handful of my hair, and threw my face into a tree. 

I fell to the ground and whined in pain as tears filled my eyes. I’ve never felt pain like this before. I touched my forehead, hoping a scar might not be left. I felt blood…

“Rafe, what the fuck!” I cried out. I tried getting up but felt dizzy and fell back down. “Be if you didn’t pull that bullshit, I would have been easier. You’ve pushed my buttons enough,” Rafe said as Trooper walked up from behind him. 

“My truck. She pissed me off for the last time,” Topper said as he came up to me and grabbed me. “No, let me go you bastard,” I whined, feeling pain every time my brain worked too much. Topper threw me over his head and then walked off with me. 

Rafe smirked at me behind Topper's back, knowing he was up to no good. “Put me down! Where are you taking me? Let me fucking go!” I tried being loud but they just laughed. 

“Trying to stay tough? We’ll see how much of a tough girl you are once I break you,” Rafe said. “What?” I asked, confused but they ignored me since I didn’t really give a full question for them to ask me. 

“Open it up,” Topper said, sounding heated, but that’s not my problem. He put his hands on me and got what he deserved. Now it’s Rafe’s turn once I get a hand of myself. 

“Give us a hard time, and it’ll get worse, do you understand?” Topper asked right after he dropped me in his back seat. “Fuck you,” I said, full-heartedly, making him grab my ankles and pull me out of his truck. 

I fell to the ground, hitting the back of my head on the way down, making Rafe laugh in disbelief. He couldn’t believe how Topper was acting. It’s like he loves seeing this side of him. Like he’s been waiting. 

“You’re gonna learn some fucking manners,” Topper growled under his breath as I heard him fondling with his belt-hand jeans. “I thought you had some, but you clearly don’t Kook,” I said harshly as I tried to keep my vision focused, but couldn’t. 

Seconds later, Tooper harshly grabbed my hair, causing me to whine in pain but they were soon stopped by his cock being forced into my mouth. I screamed, trying to wiggle away, now noticing what they’d been trying to do, but it was too late. I’m here now, alone and far away from the crowd. 

“You talk a lot for a girl who struggled taking cock,” Topper thrust his hip harshly to force himself further into my mouth. I tried begging him to stop but he only pushed further until he was completely down my throat. 

“Fuuuck!” He groaned as he hunched over to rest his hand inside of his truck. “Shit… This is cheating,” he said, going to pull out but his knees bucked as my lips moved along his shaft. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he said under his breath as Rafe came up. ��Just do it. You’re already here. Besides. We ain’t tell Sarah. I’ll make sure of it,” Rafe basically threatened. “Y-You promise?” Topper stuttered at me trying to relax him in my throat, but couldn’t. 

“I promise bro, just fuck her mouth. It doesn’t even count,” Rafe said, which is a lie. “Fuck! Thank you, bro,” Topper thanked before he continued his assault. 

“No, no, no!” I tried screaming and pushing him off, which made my headache worse. “Finally putting that bitchy little mouth to use,” Topper looked down at me as he tighten his grip on my hair, causing me to yelp in pain. 

“Better be glad I’m not stuffing your pussy full of my cum. Otherwise, you’d be a whore stuffed twice tonight by two different men. Maybe three times if JJ gets to action and realizes what a useful slut you are,” Topper said some hard words that Rafe would only say. Now I know why they’re so close. 

“Should take her back to the house to do what we really want to her. Maybe then she’ll realize how easy it is to get what we want,” Rafe said as he came up and rubbed a tear off of my cheek. 

“No, no, she needs to go back to the group. Don’t want them getting too suspicious,” Topper struggled to say. He’s close. And he’s going to make me swallow everything. 

“True. I’ll get my chance another time. We see how easy it is, after tonight,” Rafe chuckled as he backed up and Topper’s thrust got sloppy. I squeezed my eyes shut as Topper groaned loudly and slammed all the way down my throat to release. 

“And you swallowed it. How pathetic,” Topper said as he pulled out. He pushed my head away, causing my body to lay out on the floor once again. I thought it was over until Rafe pulled me up to my feet and then sat me down on the edge of Topper's trunk. 

“Keep your mouth shut, or I’ll have all of Figure 8 after your pretty ass, do you understand?” Rafe threatened again. I nodded as tears rolled down my cheek. 

Rafe stuck his tongue and dragged it across my face, licking up all of my tears until he reached my mouth to make out with me. I didn’t want to. He made me. I stayed still and stiff and didn’t move my lips as he went to work.  

I can’t believe he’s huffing and puffing while doing this. He’s turned on and gripping my waist. How could they be okay with this?

I’m now at home, lying beside JJ after the long night out. I had to tell him the bathrooms had long lines. He asked me about the blood on my face, and I lied. I told him “You know how I am? I hit my damn head on the bathroom stall,” and he believed it…

Part two!

part three!

[dreamysturniolo57]

Insomnia - Matt Sturniolo

Summary: You moved to England when you were 13, but you've been home for a month which means you met the sturniolo triplets again who you grew up with. You all missed each other and now you are at their house for a sleepover. At night you can't sleep so you decide to go to the kitchen and then everything turns upside down.

Warning: swearing/p in v/ sweet talk

Orange: Chris

Blue: Matt

Green: Nick

Pink: reader

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Nick and I were singing 'Had me at hello' from that Disney movie. We were playing karaoke. It was just the four of us. Chris was recording and I felt that someone was burning a hole in my back with his eyes. I knew it was Matt. I heard him laughing at us. He was too cool for things like this. I was having so much fun. I really missed these idiots. When we finished I layed down on the comfy couch and drank some water.

That was fun. You really have a great voice Y/N.

Yeah, you should sing more. -Chris said then put his phone down.

Thanks. Actually i like singing. -I said and put some popcorn in my mouth. For a second I looked at Matt just to not feel himself left out but he was staring at me. I don't know why but i couldn't held the contact so I turned my face the other side.

So what should we play next? -I asked rubbing my palms together.

Easy. Truth or truth.

Come on! -I said and rolled my eyes.

I'm down!

Me too. -Matt finally spoke. Great.

I sighed and prepared myself for the worst. I sat up and crossed my legs on eachother.

I'm going first! Chris have you ever had 3 days off of showering?

No, gross! Never. -we all laughed.

Y/N have you had a boyfriend in England?

I did. -they all smiled at my answer except for one person.

You gonna tell me about it girlll.

Okay. Matt... Have you ever eaten cucumber with peanut butter? -I asked him and looked in his eyes.

Unfortunately yes. -He said. I should have known he had. Sometimes they have crazy ideas. The game continued and we asked each other lots of funny questions, but then Chris asked me something I didn't want to answer.

Have you ever had a crush on one of us? -my smile disappeared and my throat constricted.

That's a stupid question. -I said and crossed my arms.

So you did. -he smiles at me. Chris some day i'll kill you... I thought. They looked at me curiously.

No! Of course not. We grew up together. -I answered.

Don't lie! -so Nick is already attacking. Super.

At least tell who would you choose? -I looked at Chris with murderous eyes. Then for some reason I looked at Matt. He watched me with a calm face.

Okay. Easy. I would choose Nick. You happy? -I asked and I sipped another dose of water to relieve my tension.

Lame. -he said.

Don't be a dick. -Matt told him. I looked at him and he noticed it. I gave him a hint of a smile.

When we felt it was time to go to bed, we all retired. I was sleeping with Nick. I've always been the closest to him, and maybe he was the only one who noticed that I was hopelessly falling for Matt. When I moved away it felt like ripping my heart out. Then I came back and I could barely recognize them and when I saw how much Matt changed all the feelings surfaced. They were never buried actually.

I was trying to sleep but Nick was snoring so loud. I turned my head and tried to shut out the sound, but I couldn't. I smiled at him and shook my head. I stood up and quietly went out. Then I carefully opened Chris's door, but I saw that he was sleeping sprawled on the bed. Great... I decided to go to the kitchen to drink some cocoa. It always helped me. I sat down and turned the little light which was above the stove. I was lost in my thoughts when I heard footsteps.

Can't sleep? -he asked and sat in front of me.

When did Nick start snoring like a bear? -he smiled at me and shook his head.

About 3 years ago. -he answered and crossed his arms. I cheekily grazed my eyes on his tattooed arm. I've never thought he is going to get one.

Did you hear when i came out? -I asked and sipped my cocoa.

Yeah but I thought you were Chris. I bought some muffins and I hid it because he always finds it. -I just laughed.

Well, don't worry. I'm not gonna eat it.

I'm happy to share it with you. -he said smiling.

Thanks, I will take the opportunity. -I responded.

Ah..I'm so tireeed. -I cried out like a baby.

You can sleep with me. -he offered then I gulped.

I don't want to bother you. You must be tired too. -I said and tried to avoid his eye contact.

Not really. I think i might have insomnia or something. Lately I've been sleeping late. -he srugghed and smiled.

You sure you don't mind? Because I checked Chris but he was sleeping like a starfish and I...-

Come on Y/N. I'm here for you too. -he said. He extended his hand to me as he stood up and nodded. I took his hand and let him pull me up from the chair, then without breaking the contact of our hands, he led me to his room. I saw blue led lights around the ceiling, which made the room very cozy. Blue is also my favourite colour.

Feel yourself home. -he said.

Thanks. -I said trying not to blush or anything like that. My stomach was flilping of excitement and I was so shy.

You need anything?

No. I'm good. -I sat down on his bed and smoothed the wine red silk cover. Matt always had a really good taste. I layed down and covered my legs with the blanket because I was wearing shorts which was too short. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable. He laid down next to me on his back putting one arm under his head. I was just staring at him.

So tell me about that insomnia. What's wrong? -I asked and put both of my hands under my face.

Okay, i'm not sure I have it. I just.. can't sleep. I wake up in the middle of the night sometimes. And it's really tiring. -he sighed then continued. -I turn around a lot and feel restless.

Have you tried camila tee? Or something...-

I've tried everything. Believe me. -he sad and finally looked in my eyes. The heck... My pulse got faster.

I'll find something for you.

Thanks Ms. England.

Shut up. -I laughed.

You do have some accent. The cool british one. -he said imitating me.

That's not my fault. I lived there. Of course my accent changes. -I said.

I like it. It's cute for you. -he said. I felt a lump in my throat, which was difficult for me to swallow. I suddenly turned to my other side, involuntarily bringing the blanket with me and this led to my bottom showing. These damn pajamas only reached the bottom of my butt line.

Good night. -I said. He didn't say anything. He just inhaled the air sharply. Then I felt a squirm and that the bed was sinking right next to me.

Can I ask something? -Matt was so close to my ear I could feel his breath tickling my neck.

Yeah...-I said in a questoning tone.

Why did you lie?

About what? -I asked back still looking forward at the wall.

About who would you pick. You rubbed your right ear when you said it would be Nick. When you lie you always poke your right ear. -as he spoke i was 100% sure he was inches away from my right ear. The air stuck in my lungs and tried to calm down. How the fuck he knows I do that when I lie??!

I.. I don't know what you are talking about. -i said.

I know you do. Don't lie. -he said. Fuck.... why is he doing this to me? I was shaking inside. My stomach convulsed.

And what if I was lying? It's just a stupid game. -i groaned.

It was called Truth or truth. -how detailed he has become.

I don't care. And I don't rub or poke my ear if i'm lying. -I said.

You don't? -when he asked that, I felt his lips touch my ear. I squealed and i suddenly forgot how to breath. Then he kissed the skin behind my ear and my mind was blown. My chest rose rapidly and I squeezed the blanket. He kissed it again and he bit my earlobe too. I wasn't sure if this was real or I was dreaming. I closed my eyes and sighed.

Tell me if I was wrong. -he murmured at my neck and kissed it.

I...-I started but i wasn't able to put a normal sentence together. I was dumb. I bit my lip instead and tried not to moan. One of his hands caressed my waist then it slid to my stomach.

Tell me who did you really want to say. -he said while his hand started going under my shirt. I couldn't stop sighing. It felt like an eletric shock when his skin met mine.

Y-you...-I squeezed out of my lips. He was still kissing my neck and behind my ear. I saw dimly and I could barely open my eyes. I'm sure I looked like Bella Swan when Edward was sucking the vampire poison out of her.

That's what I wanted to hear. -he whispered. Here is where the thread broke for me. He was still close to me so I turned my head to face him and I pulled him down putting my palm on his neck. Our lips finally met and it felt like fireworks. He crawled my skin gently under my shirt then it went higher right where my tits were. He was still on top of me and I was lying on my side under him. He cupped my breast giving each mound a squeeze. I moaned into his mouth. He was eating my lips and i didn't mind. Soon I turned on my back so he can totally tower over me. Our legs were tangled. We didn't break the kiss not for a second. I grabbed his hair and pulled it then I caressed it. I've always loved how fluffy it was. He spread my legs and held one up to his waist and caressed it gently. The room was filled with heat and tension. The blue lights made it even exciting. I ran my fingers down to his shirt and he broke off just long enough to take off his shirt and throw it on the floor. I smiled at him and he attacked my neck again. He licked it and bit it gently. I was totally losing my mind.

Ah...-I moaned. I grabbed his hair again.

Can I take this off? -he asked holding my shirt between his fingers. I nodded and helped him by lifting my self up. He started going down with his kisses and he kissed every inch of my breast including my twins. He reached my stomach kissing and biting it. My eyes were closed and I was grabbing the edge of the pillow with both hands.

Matt...-I moaned his name from my lips.

Yeah? Is something wrong? Shit I went too far didn't I?-he asked and he crawled towards me again.

Please.... Do something. -I said squeezing my legs together. He felt my move and smiled at me.

Down there. Right? -he whispered near my lips. He left a soft kiss on them then he slowly led his hand to my shorts. I was holding on his neck sometimes caressing his hair. I let out a sigh when he touched my clit.

So wet. -he murmured in my ear. I crawled his back. I was aching for his touch. He continued caressing my center area and he put one finger inside me. I could feel the knot was building up in my abdomen.

One more... please...-I sighed pressing my lips. He complied with my request and inserted a second finger.

M-matt I'm gonna... I - suddenly he pulled out his fingers and I groaned in displeasure.

Noo! -I said and put my hand down so I can finish it myself but he grabbed it and put both of my hands next to my head.

How impatient. You know I can give you pleasure with...-he started and pressed his lap against mine. I bit my lip of the thought him being inside of me.

You want it? -he asked looking in my eyes.

Yes. I want you. -I said looking deeply in his eyes. He smiled at me and slowly pulled my pajama shorts along with my panties. He reached out to his nightstand and pulled out a condom.

Why do you have these? -I asked. I wondered how many girls he takes in his room.

Because I'm responsible?!- He said in a questioning tone.

So you bring a lot of girls here?-I asked.

I bought these when you moved back. And I don't bring anyone here. There's only one girl who can sleep in my bed and that's you. -he sighed and caressed my face.

So you mean...you are a virgin? -I asked raising my eyebrows.

No. I just didn't bring anyone here. -i smiled at him, then placed a sweet kiss on his lips.

Are you still...? -he asked this time.

I only did it once. -I said pressing my lips.

I wish I was your first. -he muttered.

You are Matt. Since we were little kids. -I said caressing his hair. He smiled at me and kissed my cheeks.

If something hurts just say and I'll stop baby. -he said and slowly pushed himself up. I bit my lip trying to hold back the painful waves.

Oh...gosh. -he cried out burying his face in my neck. He pulled out then pushed himself back and he did it again and again.

You okay? Does it hurts? -he asked looking at my face.

No. I'm alright just ahh....-i moaned when i lifted my hips a little to get comfortable.

Please Matty...-I could barely speak. He let out a little laugh and started moving. He started kissing my neck again leaving wet kisses on it.

You are so tight. -he groaned. I was trying to be quiet because I didn't want to wake the others up. He hold my legs up pressing it to my chest. He thrusted deeper and I put my palm on my mouth.

Fuck...-I cried out. His movements got faster and deeper and I was losing my mind. He intertwined our fingers and now I put my legs around his waist.

I...I love you. -he said while he started slowing down and he hit that pleasant spot. I dropped my head back for a moment.

I love you too. -I said putting my palms around his neck pulling him down for an intense kiss. He gave me the final thrust and I felt my walls clenched his dick. He moaned and stayed deep inside me then collapsed. I was trying to catch my breath but it wasn't easy.

You are amazing. -he said smoothing my hear out of my face. We were sweaty.

No no. You are. -I sighed out closing my eyes. He pulled out of me and pulled down the condom putting his boxers on. He grabbed my stuff and put it on the bed. He climbed over me again kissing every inch of my face. I laughed and felt like a little girl.

I could bear it if I had insomnia because of you. -he whispered.

Shut up. -I said. I put on my shirt and panties then laid on his chest.

This was all I ever wanted. -he said caressing my cheek.

Well I would say the same. I missed you. Actually I missed you more than Chris and Nick. But don't tell them. -he giggled at my statement.

I won't. -he responded. We were making eye contact for a long time and it's so hard to believe that this all just happened. Finally I was his.

[neo404]

(Here is some prompts i came up with )

Nicks boyfriend meeting his parents for the first time

Nicks boyfriend trying to teach him how to drive

Nick and reader shower together

Nick and reader slow dancing together in the kitchen or his bedroom

Nick is meeting the readers parents for the first time and he is nervous

Falling again.

Summary: moments in which Nick realized he loves you more and more everyday you spend together.

Tw: cursing.

Note: for the last scenario I HAD to make the dad latino, Idk why, I just had to (I’m latino btw)

1: Meetings

‘’I swear they will be nice.’’ Nick grabs my hand as we walk to the restaurant.

‘’I know, they sound so kind and supportive. But I’m just nervous, what is I say something weird? What if they don’t like me?’’

‘’Don’t say that, they already love you. I talk about you non stop to them, they already love you, trust me.’’ His thumb caresses my hand and I let out a sigh.

‘’All right, I got this. It will be fine.’’ I take a deep breathe and open the door of the nice restaurant Nick choose. We approach the table where his parents were already sitting and I smile at them widely. ‘’Hello, it’s so nice to finally meet you.’’ Nicks mom stands up and gives me a tiny hug, I shake my father in laws hand. As I sit next to Nick, I try to get myself together.

‘’We are so excited to meet you; you won’t believe the incredible things Nick says about you. I’m so happy that my boy found someone as sweet and loving as you.’’ His mom’s voice is sweet, it makes me feel less anxious.

‘’The pleasure is mine, truly.’’

‘’How did you and Nick meet?’’ His dad asks.

‘’Well, it’s a funny story actually.’’ Nick says. ‘’I think you should tell it.’’ He looks at me lovingly.

‘’Well, I was buying coffee one morning and as I was leaving the shop someone who passed by me running blew the cup out of my hands and it landed directly on my new sweater.’’ Nick shrugs his shoulders and points at himself. ‘’So, he comes back, sweaty and out of hair. He introduces himself and tells me that he’s sorry, and that he wants to buy me a new coffee. And I said fine, so we talked about whatever, and then I remembered I had a job interview, but my sweater and shirt was all drenched in brown, so we changed shirts and he gave me his jacket. And he asked for my number so we can give back our things.’’ I smile while telling the story, it’s one of my favorite moments together. ‘’And we did, I had my clean sweater and shirt back, and the rest is history.’’

‘’Awww, that’s so sweet.’’ Nicks mom puts a hand to her chest. ‘’Nick, he’s such a sweet guy.’’

‘’Yeah, he is.’’ He smiles at her.

‘’I guess I am. Have you already seen the menu? There’s a lot of options to choose from.’’ I smile at them.

‘’Oh no, we haven’t seen it.’’ Nicks dad says. And as they start to eye the menu and talk to each other, Nick leans into my hear.

‘’I love you so much. I really do.’’ He whispers.

‘’I love you more.’’ I whisper back.

2: Patience  

‘’No, that’s the brakes.’’ I point at his feet and he lets out a groan.

‘’They look the same.’’

‘’Of course, they look the same, they are both pedals. What do you expect?’’

‘’I don’t know, this is so frustrating.’’

‘’I know, I know. It’s fine, we just have to be patient. Now, drive.’’ Nicks foot slams down on the accelerator and then puts it up fast, making the car go forward at full speed just a few centimeters. ‘’SLOWLY, drive slowly.’’

‘’Yeah, I can do that.’’ Nicks tense hands wrap around the steering wheel and his foot goes down the pedal slowly, more moderated.

‘’See, better now.’’ I cheer him up. ‘’Now, lets turn to the right.’’ As Nick tries to turn right, we end up in the top of the sidewalk, with a trashcan on the floor.

‘’I give up.’’ Nick says crossing his arms.

‘’Me too.’’ I look at his disappointed face. ‘’But it’s all right, not everyone is built for this, is a hard think to learn and do, I’m so proud of you for trying.’’ I rub his shoulder and kiss his cheek. ‘’Plus, I love the fact that you can drive, it makes us spend more time together.’’ I see his tiny frown turn into a smile.

‘’Yeah, I like that too.’’ He looks at me and gives me a kiss on the lips. ‘’I think we should switch sits so we can go back to my house.’’

‘’Yeah, we also have to pick up that trashcan.’’

I hear him laugh. ‘’You are right. Thank you for trying. I love you.’’ Nicks hand is on my cheek.

‘’I love you more, now get off the car before someone calls the police.’’

3: Trust

‘’Hey, you sure you wanna do this?’’ He looks at me concerned, both of his hands on my cheeks making me look at him in the eye.

‘’Yes, I trust you. I wanna be closer to you, to feel like we can be intimate and vulnerable with each other. I really want to do this Nick, I’m sure.’’

‘’All right.’’ He kisses my forehead and let’s go of my face. He opens the door to his bathroom and the room is lithe with scented candles. ‘’I wanted to make it special. I’m sorry if it’s too corny.’’

‘’No, it’s perfect, I love it.’’ We walk inside and Nick closes the door behind him, walking near the shower he turns it on and regulates the water. He turns to me and gulps. ‘’I want you to take off my clothes.’’ I say trying too not be too shy. He nods, taking of my shirt slowly, he eyes my body, taking in every inch of it. I help him with his shirt, and soon enough we are both surrounded by the hot water of the shower. We don’t speak, there is no need for it. His hands clean my body and I clean his. The strong smell of his shampoo and soap rub into me. His arms hug me and with the help of the water, they keep me warm. This is all I wanted and more, all I needed and more.

When we finish with the shower, we help each other dry, he puts his pajamas on, I put his pajamas on.

‘’Thank you.’’ I whisper as he helps me dry my hair.

‘’It’s nothing, thank you.’’

‘’It was nice, it felt amazing. I love you, Nick.’’

‘’I love you more.’’ He kisses my cheek and his hands keep moving the towel on my head.

4: Only fools rush in

‘’Now, we put the cookies on the oven.’’

‘’All right, cookies on the oven. How long do we have to wait?’’ Nick asks as he opens the oven carefully.

‘’Like an hour I think.’’ I see him put the trail with cookies on the oven and close it off.

‘’An hour?’’ he scoffs. Grabbing his phone and skipping the song that was playing on the tiny speaker on top of the table.

‘’I like that song, don’t skip it.’’ I say smiling as I start to sing along. ‘’Wise men say, only fools rush in…’’ I sing as I twirl and dance alone. I hear the music going up a bit, I see Nick walk up to me, putting his hands around my waist, I wrap my arms around his neck.

‘’But I can’t help, falling in love with you.’’ He whispers into my ear as we move back and forward to the beat of the song.

 Shall I stay?

Would it be, would it be a sin?

If I can't help falling in love with you.

‘’Did you know that I’m in love with you?’’ Nicks chest vibrates as he speaks.

‘’Yes, I am aware. Do you know that I love you?’’

‘’I know. How much?’’

‘’More than you imagine.’’

Like a river flows

Surely to the sea

Darling, so it goes

Some things, you know, are meant to be.

‘’We are like an old married couple, dancing in the kitchen, baking cookies. I love it.’’ I smile looking at him in the eyes.

‘’We are, we just aren’t old, or married. But we can fix the last part pretty soon.’’

Take my hand

Take my whole life too

For I can't help falling in love with you.

5: Not the same

‘’Come on, breath in and out. It’s all right, my parents are… nice.’’

‘’Why did you hesitate?’’ Nick freaks out.

‘’Well, they are a bit over protective, but it’s normal. I have told them all the great thing about you, it will be fine.’’ I squeeze his hand as I open the door to my parent house.

‘’Hi mom, hi dad. how are you?’’ I hug my parents.

‘’All good, exited to finally meet your boyfriend.’’ My mom says.

‘’Yeah, we have to see who is dating mi hijito, plus, we have to see if he is bueno. Mira todos esos tatuajes, igualito a mi, se ve que es rudo el chico, me gusta.’’

‘’What? Sorry, what did he say?’’ Nick looks at me concerned.

‘’He said that you are covered in tattoos just like him, that you seem like a tough guy and he liked that.’’ Nick smiles.

‘’Oh… yeah, I am a tough guy.’’ He smiles at my dad.

‘’Eso mijo. Now, let’s go, tu pa preparo una parrillada riquisima, al gringo le va a encantar.’’ I laugh and nod to him, grabbing Nick by the hand and walking with him to the dinning table.

‘’My dad cooked barbecue, he says you will love it.’’

‘’Yeah, yeah. I will love it.’’ Nick smiles as he sits on the table next to me.

‘’See, it’s fine. Thank you for coming, I really wanted you to meet my parents.’’

‘’It’s nothing, thank you for inviting me. Means the world to me, I love you.’’

‘’I love you more.’’