#the first scene is so goofy and kinda has some problems with the 'ooh man in a dress how weird-looking' routine

[morethanwonderful]

God the first chapter of Tai Sui is so silly, but it's also, like. Here's Xi Ping being ridiculous and causing a scene with some insane scheme, but he's doing it to help out a friend that was put in a tight spot. Here's Xi Ping as the mysterious masked musician behind the scenes, playing the music and controlling the scene while someone else sings in the spotlight.

Xi Ping starts and ends the novel with Jiangli. He's her accompaniment and she's his namesake hundreds of years after her death. And given his last scene in the final extra—the glimpse of that performance at the movie before he dies, Xi Ping starts and ends the novel as an enigmatic performer with no real name, followed by waves of gossip in his wake.

He's always just that odd person playing the qin, his identity disguised, both beginning and ending forever.

[blistering-typhoons]

BBC SHERLOCK REWATCH - A STUDY IN PINK (REAL TIME NOTES)

From the perspective of someone who watched this show when they were thirteen, made it their whole personality and then stopped being a massive prat.

I thought about organizing this into a cohesive review, and maybe as I go on I'll delve deeper into some of my observations but for now I thought it would be funny to present my findings in raw, mostly unaltered form:

- loud ass opening, my god

- only bit of acting Martin freeman ever does lmao

- dances along to theme against my will

- god the effects and transitions are so shit

- all the shots of the pills are so ugly

- oh yay molly - whoo - yayyy

- the potential withe these two goddamn

- also this sherlock does not drink his respect women juice by god

- fucksake the deduction about john's sister- not only is it translated awfully into this modern setting, it's explicitly a deduction Sherlock is supposed to make once they know eachother a bit better

- THE POTENTIAL

- also sherlock displaying one insecurity when john accidentally insults his stuff- well done moftiss, characterization

- How far away is the crime scene, why it dark

- pls the transitions

- PIPE BOMB, WHOO Phone deductionnnn

- oh my god it's so shit

- uuuuuuuugggghhhh the potential I hate this shooooow

- fuckin deduction as a way for witty one liners and sexism, i hate this place

- 'you were thinking it's annoying' i'm going to send myself off a cliff, CRINGE

- RACHE- moffat, come here a sec- literally putting ACD on par with the police, who are always wrong the sheer audacity- also just a bad change

- these lens flare white lights are so goofy please, you will never be a whole scene of silence with jeremy brett

- benedict cumberbatch is very pretty i will grant

- terrorized by the fact i used to quote this show unironically

- from a writing point of view I understand that John gushing over Sherlock is to show off and emphasize their specialest boy- but, some sincerity is infused into it from an acting standpoint

- 30:02 GIRLIE WHAT IS THAT SOUND EFFECT

- OOH YAY THE PSYCHOPATH/SOCIOPATH STUFF WHOO YEAAAAH

- All the phones calling as john walks past is kinda cool but mostly stupid

- oh anthea, what a rich character lmao

- how long was mycroft posed like that

- First johnlock queerbait whooo

- Where does he fuck off to???

- he just vanishes lmaoooo

- Three patch problem. Bruh.

- I am bored as shit, help

- This music- girl

- Bloated is a very good word to describe some of these scenes

- HERE SHE IS- THE BIG DADDY OF QUEERBAITING

- this scene is insane fucKING INSANE I HATE THIS SHOW

- god how much episode is left fucksake

- the stop/go signs- pick a tone girl

- this episode is so almost good and it's anytime Sherlock makes a mistake lmao

- not the drugs bust :/

- ooh sociopath line- whoo

- "I don't have to [imagine]." OOOH OKAY, WELL, YOU GUYS GET *ONE* POINT FOR THAT SHEESH

- this is so ridiculous- COME WITH ME- girl shut up

- I wanna be done I wanna be doooone.

- lamenting the confrontation we had in the unaired pilot

- The 'Frwhoomp' noise as the light goes out, girl

- 20 Minutes left my christ

- BRO- I forgot that bit of ADR wooooof

- and thus begins the scree of Moriarty

- five years, why is Scotland Yard still doubtful of Sherlock's skills? I know he might have been deep in his addiction during some of that, but they evidently kept him around for crime solving.

- Great man/good man quote has me fumin babes, my god, what a fundamental misunderstanding of Sherlock Holmes

- boring ass back and forth

- this piano is giving me war flashbacks

- is it a five orange pips reference?

- also the pills look like that speckled gum that burns your throat

- when is it oveeer

- falling asleep

- bomb under the table but the table is made of glass and hates gay people

- she tooks the kidssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

- 13 min

- love, or rage, dude, come on Sherlock

- i hate this 'enjoying crime too much' theme they've written

- like watching a stupid play

- once more, the potential

- moriarty he said calmly

- also, so out of character for Sherlock do I even need to say

- peaks of what could have been- FUCK

- this mycroft fake out- lord

- also, mummy, fucksake

- cheesy ending BUT IT'S OVER

[wickymicky]

a month ago i watched every Twice video in order, some of them for the first time, because Twice was finally clicking for me and i was “getting it”. i wrote a little thing about which songs i liked and which i didnt, and i wanna expand on that cause my opinions have gotten more fleshed out over the last couple weeks of listening to them, and also some of them have changed. i just really like reviewing things, i hope that’s okay lol

so here are two or three sentence reviews of every Twice title track, in order

Like Ooh Ahh: i think this is one of their best songs, personally. it’s not as much of the bubblegum stuff they go for after this, but it’s extremely catchy lol, the “i just wanna fall in love!” and the “ha~~ ooh-ahh hage!” gets stuck in my head a lot. i just love the way this song’s instrumental sounds too, the aesthetic of it

Cheer Up: um okay so from hot to cold... this is my least favorite Twice song. i��m listening to it right now as I’m writing this, and I’ll listen all the way through, but i haven’t listened to it all the way through very often. i think the chorus feels out of place, so does the “be a man, real man” thing. i don’t like that. that ruins the song for me lol. i also don’t like the chorus much haha, it sounds like theyre saying “chore up” cause they went with 치얼업 (chi-eol/eor-eop) instead of like... even just “chireop” or “chi-eo eop”... they dont usually have ㄹ for an english r sound at the end of a word...

TT: ah okay nice we’re back on track lol, this song is fantastic and totally deserves to be their most popular song (at least in terms of music video views). when i first heard it i didnt like it cause i didnt like anything Twice lol... then when I listened to every Twice title track in order as i was beginning to “get it”, i liked everything except the “i’m like TT, ahhh, just like TT, ahhh” haha, i thought the fact that it was about the emoticon was weird and didnt fit the video, and the “ahh” was goofy haha. but now? god its so catchy lmao i always whisper-sing along to this part when i listen to this song haha. i love the echo-y reverb-y synths in the verse, and the instrumental in the chorus when paired with the vocal melody just makes it one of the best choruses in kpop lol. i think TT is their best song. the rap break doesnt feel like a rap break, it fits sooooo naturally in with the song, it’s so impressive. this song is so impressive

Knock Knock: initially i liked this song a lot, and i still do, but... this would be another group’s best song, easily, but for Twice... it’s a bit overshadowed haha. the guitar plus the synth is really cool though, its rare to hear a calming, sort of mellow, soft song with as high a BPM as this haha. one of the writers, Mayu Wakisaka, also was a composer for Loona’s Hi High and Fromis 9′s Love Bomb... and you can totally see that lol. all of those songs have high BPMs and are wildly catchy. still, idk, i like this song but i dont have a ton to say about it

Signal: this song is weird in a good way, i love really unconventional instrumentals. it sounds as alien and outer space as the music video haha. at first the “sign-eul bonae signal bonae” kinda annoyed me, but i got more used to it. i don’t listen to this song much, but i should change that, honestly. though another thing is that the music video has a lot those things where it adds sounds from the video that arent in the regular song, and has an intro i gotta skip every time lol, but like thats not a huge problem, i can just listen to the song elsewhere haha

One More Time: this song sounds like something you’d hear at a hockey game lmao. i dont even know really what i mean by that, i dont go to hockey games lol.... anyway. i like this song, but again, it’s kinda overshadowed. if i’m in the mood for the vibe this song has, there are other Twice songs that have it that i like more. it’s refreshing every once in a while though.

Likey: this song is so good!!! it didnt stand out at first, like, there’s not really a huge gimmick like some of the others... “likey likey likey” is kind of the same sort as the “just like TT” and “knock knock knock on my door” and stuff from other songs, but for some reason it feels less prominent in this song. i dont think this is their most iconic song ever, and its not genre-defining or one of the ones you’d mention first when talking about Twice, but it’s just a really solid song. one of my favorites

Heart Shaker: yeah, heart shaker is alright. it was apparently just a couple months after likey, and it feels like a similar concept? maybe it’s just the music video giving me that impression. it’s alright. the music video has the longest part with the distinctive way Twice shoots dance scenes... in that very nauseating way lol... but i don’t mind it lol i’m used to that by now

Candy Pop: so like, was this song sorta made for kids specifically? i guess i’m mostly just being influenced by the music video cause i’m watching it while writing this. i dont like the video much lmao it’s like a pokemon ripoff complete with Officer Jennies and Jin-young Brock. the song’s not bad though, it’s catchy but it’s a little too sugary sweet for me (which makes sense given the concept i guess). i like a lot of ideas in the instrumental though... because it was also written by the people who did Knock Knock, including the writer of Hi High and Love Bomb. 

What is Love: this isnt their best song ever, but it’s undeniably one of their most solid. i listen to it a lot haha. the music video has a cool concept, i like when groups do this kind of thing (interpreting scenes from movies or famous music videos or popular culture). i don’t have much to say other than that i like it a lot, it’s one of my favorites i think

Wake Me Up: okay here we go, this is another one of the three Twice singles I just don’t really like. it’s a fine song up until the chorus. i just can’t get over the shift upwards in.. uhh.. scale? octave? pitch? one of those lol, or something else, i dont really know music terms like that very well haha. yeah though i just find it offputting. 

Dance the Night Away: it’s alright. i’m pretty neutral on it. i was put off at first but i’ve gotten used to it. though still, i’m not that into it. i get that its a dance focused song and the choreography does look a lot more intense than their other choreos, and thats cool, but that doesnt make me like the music in and of itself. it’s a summer-jam type of song, and i’m not as into those anyway. there’ll never be a better kpop summer-jam than Red Flavor anyway lol

Yes or Yes: this is the other Twice that i don’t like haha. i just think the constant “you only one choice: yes or yes” thing is kind of annoying haha. also the chorus is catchy in a way that i dont think its especially exciting... it’s an earworm because i think it’s slightly annoying, not because it’s satisfying. of the songs that i’ve said i don’t like, this is the one i could see myself getting into the most. this might not always be in my “bottom three”. it is right now though

Fancy: this was the first comeback they had since i’ve been into kpop, and even though i wasnt into Twice at the time, i wanted to try it out just to see if it would change my mind, and it did somewhat.... sorta. it got the ball rolling for sure. it came out on my birthday, the same day as the Loona Fire dance cover haha, that was a good birthday. yeah this song is great, i think it’s better than any of their 2018 comebacks, personally. the concept isn’t all that different from normal Twice, it just appears that way cause the video is so lavish and elegant. it didnt convince me to be a Twice fan on that day it came out, but I liked what I thought made it different from the other Twice songs I’d heard. but now? what I like most about it is how very Twice it really is. the thing is, I wasn’t into Twice probably because the only songs i’d heard were Yes or Yes and Cheer Up, and those songs are still my least favorites lol. Fancy doesnt sound that out of place when you take into account their whole discography! i looove the video and i loooove the chorus so much, this song is great and i wonder if they’ll be able to top it if they have another comeback this year

Breakthrough: okay so in the last one i said i wonder if they’ll be able to top it this year, i meant in terms of Korean comebacks lol. cause in terms of just songs in general, if i include their new Japanese comebacks, they’ve already topped Fancy. this song is the one that finally won me over. this is the song that made me a Twice fan. now, this one is a little outside their typical concept, but they’re really really good at it nevertheless. i wonder if Twice is going a bit more in this direction? at least maybe half the time, alternating between the two styles now? cause Breakthrough continues a bit down the path that Fancy set for them. in any case, i love basically everything about this song, I’m so glad it got me to finally love their music

Happy Happy: so you know how I said that Breakthrough was a change from the bubblegum fun-fun style they’ve had and that move is what got me to finally be into Twice? well that made me think I’d like Happy Happy less haha, but actually I listen to it way more than I listen to Breakthrough, I like it more overall. this is a very Twice-style song, and that’s fine because it’s fantastic. this song genuinely makes me happy

oops didn’t i say i’d try to keep it to two or three sentences?

anyway yeah my favorite Twice songs are TT, Happy Happy, Breakthrough, Likey, and Like Ooh Ahh in that order i think

[movienotesbyzawmer]

Return of the Jedi

December 16: Return of the Jedi

(previous notes: The Empire Strikes Back)

Source: Limited Edition DVD, original 1983 edit (See my Star Wars and Empire notes)

I was 12 when this came out, and I think I saw myself as a very loyal Star Wars fan. I played with the toys a lot and had a cool picture book of this movie before I saw it. Plus the soundtrack. I was living in England at the time; IMDb would have me believe that this was released only a couple weeks later in the UK than the US, but I seem to remember having to be very patient and determined to get myself to a theater that was playing it. I took a train into London with my sister and my friend Steve, and we saw it at the Dominion Theatre, which was at the end of its decades-long history as a movie palace and entering its current incarnation as a venue for concerts and West End productions. The point is, I loved it but of course I loved it, it was my identity. Looking back it seems like it's a lot hokier than Empire but still good. Right? Let's check it out.

Opening shot recalls the first movie, except with the cool half-finished Death Star 2.

Pretty unusual to begin a Star Wars movie with Imperial characters.

Seven minutes in and we are introduced to the Imperial shuttle with the fold-up wings, and now two Tatooine creatures - Bib Fortuna and the Gammorean Guard, whose names I only know because I had the action figures - that again all demonstrate the importance of alien design.

And sure enough here's… "Jabba Du Hutt", and his motley band of creatures, at least one of whom inhabits Jabba's very fat folds and cackles like a kiddie cartoon beast.

Jabba's in-house party band, with a blue inflatable keyboardist, performs an attempt at a sequel to the Cantina band song. The song on the soundtrack album has a different chorus than this song, though.

Quite a lot of that goofy talking-in-different-languages stuff here; C3PO speaks English to both of the people he's translating to. I'm not complaining. I'm NOT complaining.

Lando furtively removes his mask for the express purpose of informing the audience of his presence.

The look of this movie is significantly improved over Empire. The big rooms. The lighting. Better production values.

Leia takes her helmet off and we get the Han/Princess theme because of course we do, and I love it.

Han is still struggling with being just recently unfrozen, but Harrison Ford still has to deliver lines that aren't really appropriate for his condition. Doesn't work out too well.

0:22:00 - Luke arrives. I kinda see why George Lucas made Han say "delusions of grandeur" because that's an important perspective on Luke. He's acting like a straight-up Jedi but he's not all that well-trained or experienced.

The Rancor is a pretty badass monster, he eats that Gammy guard, eats him up good!

Actually there's some not-so-great rear projection in this scene.

Pretty funny how sad the Rancor-master is.

C3PO translates a few syllables from Jabba into a whole paragraph describing the pit where they're going to die. By 1000-year digestion. A death so hard it makes you live way longer so you can die for a super long time.

Luke: "Free us or die". It is corny. But it's part of an arc that takes us way into the next generation.

VERY overt Wilhelm scream during this fight.

0:33:05 - Boba Fett's slapstick death, with the oopsie fall and the pit monster burping. Fans think it's stupid that such an intriguing villain got such a trivial death, and I agree.

Parade of Imperial fighters honoring the arrival of the Emperor, impressive looking! And now our first look at Ian McDiarmid as Palpatine in this trilogy. In the late 90s I joined in all the speculation about who would play the younger Palpatine in the upcoming prequel trilogy. It turned out they went with the same guy, because as old as he looked here in 1983′s Return of the Jedi, he was in his mid-30s and just wearing heavy makeup.

"No more training do you require," says Yoda. Seems like he's going easy on Luke. Although he does say he won't get to be called a Jedi unless he kills Vader. Totally making up the rules on the spot. Then he dies and vanishes like it's an appointment on his calendar that he's gotta keep, and yet barely gets around to saying "there is another Skywalker". Just being dramatic. That Yoda. You guys, fuckin' YODA.

Then speaking of being a bullshitter, Ghost-y-Wan spins some garbage about how it was kind of true what he said before FROM A CERTAIN POINT OF VIEW. Buncha FAKE NEWS.

We're at a Rebel fleet place with new kinds of ships, and the unabashedly shellfish-y Admiral.

0:52:50 - Shot of TIE fighters flying over the surface of DS2, just looks way better than the first movie.

"It's an older code, but it checks out". For some reason that simple bit of dialogue has been useful in my life.

"Hey! It's me!" That's some of that OG Han humor. Also a line that has been useful in my life.

For some reason I thought all this Forest Moon of Endor stuff didn't come until much later in the movie.

The speeder chase is pretty fun - of course they came up with neat, imaginative vehicles. With cool sound effects. Of course. They go SO FAST through all these trees.

1:01:55 - Ewok sighting. Some people really hate the Ewoks. Is that fair? They kind of purr."Eee cha wa ma". If there's a spectrum with Yoda on one end and Jar Jar on the other, I'm feeling hopeful that Ewoks are closer to Yoda.

Leia's missing and maybe dead and all Han can say is "I hope she's all right". That dialogue could have done with a rewrite.

They see C3PO and think he's a god! They burst into reverent chanting. It's kind of an insult to religion. Thumbs up.

And I gotta admit, this screwball bit is actually a good use of C3PO.

Leia sure got comfy quickly in this village. Her hair is down and she’s wearing like a nightgown. Dude you're trying to bring down the whole entire Empire, maybe stay focused.

Sometimes the Luke Skywalker performance is like a child trying to act like more of an adult than he is. It's gotta be deliberate, right? That acted earnestness?

Lando's co-pilot is a new kind of alien who talks pretty cool.

Ooh, very cool looking big fleet jumping to lightspeed!

One thing that works is when a forest speeder thing gets damaged, it destabilizes it and makes it go in a spiral. For some reason that just makes sense.

1:34:40 - Impressive volume of fighters in this battle, definitely a step up from the other movies.

It's really quite a lot of this movie that's set on Endor. The other movies do more planet-hopping. I miss it.

I'm really not having major problems with the Ewoks. But I do think that they invested a lot of this movie's story in them. Could have gone with a "leave us wanting more" approach, while maybe traveling to one or two new locales.

"I will not fight you father." That sanctimonious tone like he's pretending he's been morally consistent.

The shield dish thing blowing up looks very good! Good splody!

Drawn-out melodrama with the Emperor zapping Luke a lot, ends with Vader grabbing him and chucking him down a ginormous shaft. This famously had a "nooooooooo" added into a later version. Can confirm, such a nooooooooo is unnecessary.

Lando's character is a little tempered here. Unlike the last movie, he's just a piain ol' soldier leader man with a pleasant demeanor.

The mother ship gets all fucked up and it spears DS2 in a big flamejob splodytime! Pretty cool!

There's actually a big, shitty flaw on the left side of the image that’s been present for like the whole second half of this. A double line thing. Under normal circumstances, wholly unacceptable.

They made what seems like a weak choice to have the climax of this movie also be blowing up a Death Star, but it looks different here and it's very exciting.

Oh but now because it's the theatrical version, I have to hear the jub-jub song. Ironic that it comes across as overly Disney-like.

Well, that's done. Return of the Jedi, you have some virtues, but you are not quite as fun to like as the first two.

(next: Star Wars: The Force Awakens)

[throwingideasatthewall]

Clone Wars     Episode 9

     (Cloak of Darkness)

[Title     Scene!]

  Quote; Ignore your instincts   at your own peril

  Oof  

Acc  o    un   tability       Instincts

And  

Conscience

Valid

But also sounds like a vague threat to the   viewer

“Vice        Roy,”

  This       is where we’re starting off       on?

   Not the best episode

The first one to get a strike   from me

Who knows maybe it’s just a bad starting place   and they make something out of it

Er-

 “Luminara        And      Ahsoka,”

Interesting,     that is a good start

Showing that   Anakin has no control of his   Padawan

And opening the door for   New dynamics

Sounds interesting

Honestly, I don’t   know much   about     Luminara       so this      will    be    a   good        For        Her

“ under heavy guard,”

 It’s   two     people

 Face      Trial

 And       Get       Acquitted

“For    his   many        war   crimes,”

 Why   don’t   you   just   kick     this   bitch   from   society

Make   him   deal   with   himself

 What     did     the    other   prisoners      do      to   deserve          his            Company

   Oh            This character

   Also - still don’t   get the close-ups on      her face

Is this like the   second time   it’s happened?

Don’t think it happened with any other characters though  Obi wan is a glory hound

“ have you made contact with the   cruiser?”

  Good leadership           (Kinda)

              Assumed                    authority                               Kind

Good scene

But those dude’s eyes

Blink

Professional

Bull shit

Scam art       ist

I’m glad it seems to have the awareness   not to have the clones fall for this

“Generous,”

Fuck off old man

Also Luminara just called him    ‘Subtley’     a piece of work

Good for her

Dude don’t   respond to him

Don’t let him have any control   or say in your life

“Tempting   offer,”

“ I have a   gift for you,”

Snarky   little   shit

Also; I thought he was going to go for the   gag

What     have   really   been      the    tea

“Finally,”          Nope       Tone     is   already     out     the   window

 I’m   starting      to   think     it’s      a   problem     with   female   characters

  But      Lumi nara       hear      sounds     perf   ectly      fine

Maybe     it’s    just   child   female   characters...

  Nice

 Really         Like          The        Design       Going        Here

  Ooh      Sweet     columns       Here

All around the sides give it abstract   value

Like salagtites

Why   doesn’t someone   muzzle   him?

Like I know the moral reasons   why

But   if you’re going to     enable     Please   do with the utmost care to your   safety

And   at least bring some of   ear phones

So... you don’t have to   listen to this   tox

Lit      igator

On one hand   playing by your own rules

On the other hand, accountability

And   how it lends itself to vigilante justice

 “Keep moving,”

Assault’s not   cool

Hahaha

I’m sorry

WHAT

Is with the dude’s    design?

He looks like   a guy   out of an old Timey      story   book

“His locks shimmered in the breeze like   Golden sunlight,’

He looks like his name is to be      Valor   Mic   -do        -good

I’m sorry that’s enough   roasting of   his design

(It’s not that         bad)

Traitor

Commander    Gre-

“Let’s   move,”

  Right      Into     His     Ear

 Gree   doesn’t     give       a     fuck

Getting   revenge     for   getting     his      ear     talked     off

Just   tossing       him      off

   Oh       no       wait        they’re   following   him   good

    I      expect   some   treachery       to      go    down

(Specifically-)

  Senator       Commando   s

 “Rate        all   security,”

  A) he’s           a war criminal

     They   want to make a show out of him

 And show they can handle it

 It’s a propaganda move

Secondly they operate under the   enabler, “Several people dec     ided to enable him so clearly   only he’s   the problem and the   others   were just poor souls   lead astray,”

(Despite the fact that this completely   un   dermineds the ability of   choice

And paint them as well-)

Actually children does work in this   analogy

 Since they will just   do   orders      And   that’s   why   they’re   not   accountable

(Only    wish      “Uncle”       Eeroy            Was       up           There)

            If I can                twist                 that             episode                 into                 any              positive                light                 it’s             showing                 how                adults                  will                  try                   to                  use               children                   to               validate             themselves                (And                  their             bullshit)

          Don’t           let            your       overconfidence           give        Gunnar         another     advantage

   She’s a child

 Gunnery       already       has       the       advantage

   As an adult

   Sure she has a gun

   That.... expression is more along the lines of what I was   expecting

  We’re going for   dull

  Ahsoka wouldn’t really   care

 Also,       ships

Don’t look like   Republic   ships

And   intimidating   music   is   playing

What’s the scoop?

Hologram?

Sidious

Dooku??

 “Vice        Roy,”

    He’s going to escape ?

   I have already put a plan into action   my Lord

   Also cloaks just coming back in   style

 Also   glad   we’re     getting     to    see     more    of   the     other     villains

Having   focused   on   Grievous   for     hours

  * They wore it   better

  “ my best apprentice            Asaj Ventress,”

   Oh we’re getting a bit of a          re-introduction to her

    And (Kinda) an answer to who that person he was      communicating   with earlier     are

 *was

   * or silence him

   Rough

 “ Ventress,”

  I like   how they keep     the diagonal lines      On Sidious’s        face

   To make his       chancellor    persona

 That’s    good   attention       to        detail

  “ you are putting a lot of faith in an operative      that has failed us in the past,”

   Call back

  “She’s a gifted       assassin,”

Aww,      he looks so innocent     here

  Also,     complements

“ you may proceed,”

Off,       Sidious sounds pretty old in that last line

Oof

“Master,”

  “There        is no   margin for error,”

 “Child,”

Okay,     woah, woah    gross

 She supposed to be a grown woman     right?

  Because otherwise holding her to the completely Wrong standard

  That’s not how you do    over sexualization of children       If Not that that’s just a standard   tox

  Comparing a grown woman to     an undeveloped-

 Let’s just hope   they don’t go down      that lane 

“ being my apprentice,”

 Being my   sub-servient

“ I am worthy,”

 “ As you shall       see,”

 Having to prove your worth   to others

 Tox.

Ship!

 Oh

Dressed     Like    Cen      turons

 The design  in this episode     is   very     goofy

Oof

Walking   towards   a normal      clone

How     goes    the   interrogation

 Oh   that’s   an     interrogator

(Also    his   voice   sounds   surprisingly   normal)

Then   again    he   seems    to   be   special   ops    /    FBI      Degree         of   enforcing

   So           maybe      more     initiative

   “Has     Vice      Roy       cracked,”

  Yes   screw   accountability      and   making    them    deal    with   themselves    away    from   society   where    they      can’t     hurt   anyone      Or   having   faith     in   society     that      no     one     will    enable

Let’s    go   Third   degree 

Nice

The   Jedi   will   wear   him   down

🎵 The Jedi are complicit in torture 🎵

   “ your thoughts betray you, Vice Roy,”

     Aka I saw you do it

   I can sense your concern   

    your fear

    That you will lose the power        and the wealth

    Falsely accumulated!

      Also no being has authority         over others

 “ I have no idea   what you’re talking about,”

 Dude...

You hide   great many    things

Asoka’s   showing      too      much    emotion

  Also what’s the betting that Asoka breaks the trial   completely irrationally

 She’s   tapping her   fingers

The locations of their   bases

“ I am an innocent pawn       in all this,”

  Bull. shit

   You. Made. A. Choice

“ if you are merely a pawn        then who are you protecting,”

Don’t enable this

Hold him accountable

And if you stumble across the bastard

Hold him accountable

Just...   Hold people    accountable

[Also, Asoka’s there   like yes   I’m helping,”]

No one   I know   nothing

Bullshit   enabler

“Liar,        Liar,”

 Told     ya

Ahsoka

Padawan

Well     At least they didn’t      Pretend Ahsoka       Was capable of doing    bad cop good cop

   Still       a completely unrealistic   outburst

  [there’s a reason why the people in bad cop- good scenarios   are adults

 This is why

Literally applying unnecessarily emotional, mental, and physical   stress

  Instead of holding him accountable

   Bullshit,   M’lady

 Just as guilty     

Asoka just brought to a new   extreme

And what would’ve been a   good scene about     how Anakin   and by default   Obi-Wan’s     ‘abuse’      Or     lessons   to do    so

Intensified

We get a scene with     an irrationally angry       Ahsoka       That shows   unrealistic      child-   like        Behavior

More   befitting    of an adult

This could’ve been a good scene about Luminara getting slapped in the face with the things she’s enabling

And   Asoka    not   realizing     (Not   able    to   realize)   The harm    in her robotic   automated   action

        And that considering       Asoka and Anakin are both under 22               The fact that she can technically               Unfuck the situation         (at least for the next generation)                And the conscientious    decision, to not to 

 Despite all the bad   signs

     Don’t know about the toxicity   level      it’s looking pretty tox

   “ I wasn’t serious,”

    You were unrealistically unchildlike

   And, by adult standards ,  you’d be had for toxicity

But   this    is   just   bad   wri   ting

“ The only way he’ll talk is if        he’s scared enough,”

  Or if he wants to

Literally, only if he   wants- to

  Em,        perhaps I was too hasty

   Let us   negotiate

  He just   decided   to do that

 Ahsoka

[I really    hope they aren’t    going   the direction   of the last   episode

And   blaming     all the    adult problems      on the child

 Ah!

Captain

“Status      Report,”

   Good      captaining

[Weird animation with   flailing arms]

Fighters    in      -coming

 They brought   boarding ships

Hey   actually doing some thing

Prepare to     repeal   the enemy

Action

  Off

 Tough    Bastards

 Right   through     the    ship

 Off

Right   there     thing      is droids

 Neat

Ok how are they going to hold off   tanks

That requires some kind of explosive

There’s   another    gun

They    get     shot   down

 Again, explosives

Oh, immediate   fill in

 [they didn’t even take that guy      to the medic!]

Also yeah stand in the same spot with   no cover

Oof

They got   one

 [are we sure that Guy didn’t     just die from exhaustion?]

Oh, yeah cannons

Get some explosives

Lot     to go

  Seriously get explosives

  Super battle droids

  I just called him   tanks

  Whelp

 Jedi are you waiting for    Cue?

 Whelp

They’re headed for the   detention level

“Aight,”

Night buddy

“ we need reinforcements- oh,”

   That was the most disinterested      scream of getting shot

  I’ve ever heard

[are we sure he didn’t get hit by a    stun weapon?]

Also,           no,   you need more    grenades

   Throwing       bodies        at it       clearly        isn’t      helping

  Commander: I’ll need your   assistance

   Why?

Also; now you help

 After everyone’s dead

 Sat   there   listening      to   chatter      for    about    5 to 6   minutes

 “You stay here with captain Aguyis,”

   What?!

   Also,       no how    about         better idea

    You       stay      here      and      deal      with      the   negotiations

  Asoka      and the   captain go to deal      with it

    So you don’t leave a child with a     manipulative maniac

    (Not encouraging   child soldiers)

   Nor   do I think   Ahsoka     can   take  them

“ Guard      the   viceroy,”

  Guard   the     manipulative     maniac       with        no     muzzle

  [But

It’s a terrible idea!]

  Hopefully        the      captain        a     more   responsible     Guard

   OK maybe will get a look into who’s ordering Ahsoka     and their general ideals

“Master,”

   Is it Master used        just for apprentices

  Shouldn’t Ahsoka be calling her something like    my lady, or some other    high old’ medieval title

 “Lord”?

“Lordess?”

 “Mistress?”

It appears you are no situation to   negotiate Padawan

Dude...

She has

A light saber

Also this is the problem with leaving   children     with toxic     adults

Rescue

Never mind they’re going Full on   unchildlike with   Ahsoka right now

Screw   interesting   narrative

 Ack

That   ended   quickly

 There she   is

Oof

That dude is   still alive

Seriously, was that the dude that got shot over the   Coms?

How?

Whelp   

ouch

Also      no one going to         notice that?

What     have you found?”

  Some       one    noticed

  “Copy,”

  Clearly           Not

   And      she      has      the     cuff

 Guess    she liked it?

 Good for her?

Battle droids are everywhere

Guess   she likes    the radio

 Also,      Luminara       didn’t kill      those droids?

 ‘Cause there were      way more than one

 “ we have to     protect the prisoner,”

  That literally     didn’t change     any      thing

  Also so Luminara is right back where   she started

     Whole scene      was pointless

     Whelp

  How do      they stand         -?

   Also     hope     clones      get       good     health   coverage

 Again     Cannon

  Unnecessarily      dead

  Whelp

 How long does it take   her to walk?!

Also who killed all those dress setting   battle droids   then?

Think it was the authors

Could’ve done this   five seconds ago

Also, sneaking around in   vents

Off

Why   are     you     here?

This is not where   prisoner

 Is

Is it the   security   core?

[is it to ship   hyperdrive?]

Whelp

Poor

Skeletal~ *Shivers*

Droid

Sorry am I supposed to like     this   droid

[I’m trying    but it looks like a    human spine]

Whoop

There     she     goes

Whelp

See   anything

People    are   getting     massacred      and     you just switched back to everything’s all right     mode        that   quickly

Whelp

Creepy   Roomba

Engine   room   seems     clear

We’ll     lock     it   down

Seriously     everyone      went      back       to   normal     real   quickly

Shouldn’t      you      be   hauling   someone     to     the   medic

  Or     PROTECT   ING       the     Priso    -ner

Seriously     no     one     can    seem        to    keep     the consistency      and the battle scene       was over      way too quick     without any confirmation

   And I’m on guard

 Not for Ventress

 But     the     droid   things

Seriously!?

[only two of them    in that hallway?!]

 The enemy   is approaching towards the   prison level

You- do realize how much that doesn’t fit up

 [” oh yeah Joe I’m just grabbing some   donuts

  “ oh good the enemy is about to capture the very important prisoner we   have,”

    Isn’t that always how it is?

     [Laugh track]

  “We’re on our way,”

  Keep watch 327

 Ok 327   T

IRONY

Also cute

 Even       if     it        does   look   like   a           dismembered        spine

 Do you know     droids never like to be called by their   nicknames

Pretty sure that’s like calling you by your last   name

Nicknames     are   different

Beeping

Oof

Again      I   wasn’t     too   worried    about    her

I’m worried about those droids

[Though do you like the sass they gave her   in this frame]

Neat

Well...

Shit

S’up

Really   playing   around   

with the droid

S’up

Again,

Looks    like     the     last        of     them   commander

 But    I   sense   our   troubles   are   not     over

Maybe because you left a child soldier do with a     mani-

S’up

Well

Sounds like your rescue-

Nope       

Cocky Ahsoka

Don’t mind me   as my brain just slowly numbs out

[Your child shouldn’t have more cocky and   sass than your adults]

I am ready to discuss our         bargain   again

This   dude   goes   back      -and-     forth   like    a   top

Padawan       Tano     may       I   have     a   word

Why?

[if     I    leave you won’t go anywhere will you?]

 Argh

The enemy has been repealed

Why are you telling her     this??

Where is          Luminara     then?

[Seriously   how long does it take     her to walk?”]

Whelp

And, subtlety             just went out the roof

[almost     literally]

Whelp,       really   showing     off

“If it isn’t-”

 Again, child

No sass

This should be Un     knowledgeably       Terrify-       Ing

Hey, some snark

“ Skywalkers little pet,”

   If only...

    More so Skywalker’s    unchildlike abomination

    Currently

  So this is a child vs adult

  This isn’t a battle of      equals

  It’s an ass beating    waiting to happen

 “ i’ll give you a     merciful death,”

 Ahhhhhhhhh

Skip

“The Padawan,”

 The   unchildlike     semi   abomination

  That’s     not      a    child

If   so   it   would         Follow       the     rules      of   writing      a   child

 As such         I have no        Commit     -ment?     Invol     vement?

Interest?

In the   fight

It could turn something into a toaster   and I’d just have to accept that

Clones   never   help

Again,   ass-       beat

 This a     curb stop battle  

waiting to happen

Whelp     See

Also   that   Guard   has   plot   armor

Whelp       -yet

Hard     pull

You     Know-

“ Skywalker’s not here to save you now,”

 Again      she   can   just   pull     a   toaster    out     of    her     ass 

This     is     the   problem    with   breaking    the rules of   writing

“I don’t need saving,”

  COMPLETELY UN     - realistically

Seriously, movie

Children for the Woobies

Adult for a bad asses

Get it right

 Any way...

Still     repels

“Over        Here,”

She’s not getting repelled by a     literal child is she

 “Buy you a planet,”

Whatever

Heck

Oh, no she can just the phase through the doors....

My sense of   suspension isn’t really broken

But it is very   well damaged

  (Especially with      Ahsoka)

   ......

Blah blah tempting taunting whatever

 “Irony,”

    NO

Irony is when an adult, one that can be held     accountable, does something     This        is poor   writing

     With       no        investment

(You   didn’t    earn     that)

 Ventress         stick him for double irony

     (Actually      deserved        irony)

Youngling

  NEVER-

( I’m filled with so much       anger)

Argh-

Whelp

Why would you check     there

Whelp

Finally       got    there

Whelp       Heck       ed 

Blah,         Blah  

Surrender

Dude    got away didn’t he

There’s too much riding for this to be a   success

Whelp

 Bull shit

  I watched that   animation!

 She didn’t press a button!

  What?!

And they all died

That dude’s a   weakling

Whelp

Frick       That

 Heck

Whelp

There     You        Go

[Dude left behind without even a   scratch]

[Or he disappeared in a    cut scene]

Cause he’s not there

Blah     Blah

That power’s kinda of neat     though

Okay

What     are we waiting   for?

 Survival

Protecting       the   prisoner

Common       sense

Everything   running   haywire

The engine   got blown up

Shouldn’t you be   busy

Should someone be switching on the back up power

[Shouldn’t the power been off for a   few seconds?]

That wouldn’t screw with the   buttons

Also   there   he is

[I’m five seconds from calling bullshit-]

Whatever

An explosive bomb     Caused- 

[Frustrated     inhale]

 Okay-

Don’t

Gunnery

-No

I’m-

Too     Tired

 To   yell at enable(r) logic

Whatever

       [oh so yeah there clearly are explosives!]

[Fru       strated]

 .....

No

....

-

[i’m getting a damn tox     headache from this ]

Damn

  .....

Argh

Argh...

Whoah

 No

But...     

Cool

Whelp

Whelp

Tal     king

.....

OMG

What     ever

Neither     do   you

-What

Why-

Argh    -

Oh-

 Just-

Argh-

Well-

 Hmm

ARGH

 ..

 Bull shit

Alright

 ‘ superior        my       ass’

  Droids

  Right.....

Whatever

Nice fight   scene

I don’t   care

‘cause        it’s   overshadowed      by     Asoka’s   bullshit

Whelp

 What-         Ever

 Hmm 

They’ve got it all reversed      They’ve given     Luminara     all of Ahsoka’s      helplessness         (And     reactions)      Asoka has ended up with all of the     Luminara’s         Self-assured     confidence      (One of     which can be       switched     because an     adult     react     (Almost)       as much       as they wish     (Child-like      naivetè     absolutely      not)      Does    not     work   the     other         way

    That’s      what’s wrong      with this cut     scene        (Scene)

  And        It       Gets      Worse...

Count     Dooku

Whatever

Blah    blah    blah

Whatever       That’s        Cool

“I can’t dis-”

Back to this     again

Stop saying    

start doing   movie

Also   you know     what would be great?

Having     Luminara         Have         This        Con     versation        Debating        if     she     should     disobey     her     previous         handlers,         as      she     sends         a      child        to       their       very         literal         death            Giving           the        watcher          some               hope              when                she            decides                to           eventually             decides                 to               rescue                 Ahsoka

Or   the   feeling    of   dread        as     she   continues      to     follow   orders     cutting   with     Ahsoka   getting     her     ass   kicked      to   contrast       the    wrongess         of           the         situation

    Ventress,         eventually         leaving           her         out          of          pity

      The        Future          now         with a           lot          more        distance            to          cover

         If            it          ever           wishes           to       recover              ...

 Wasted potential

    It even            Has the            Line        Over stepp          ing                  Bound       aries

 Argh

    And          Gene        rational          Back          Stab...

      It      does     everyt           hing          wrong

    For           the        common         courtesy         of not           Blast         - ing              My           Ears            Off            Try  ing         To         Ma       -ke              An       abus      -i        ve              Mom         ent-               A              Nice          One

     It          Gets              No          Tox      (Though              it        Certainly         Te sts       The      Boundary)

      (Even a moral           about how       you’re expendable to           enablers...