#the double standards are nauseating

[counterpunches]

source

[transcript: [slide 1]

we are treated differently and we are so tired

[slide 2] From day one, we were treated differently: the celebrations

Hamas is an internationally-recognized terrorist organization that is explicit in its aim to annihilate Israel and the Jewish people in its very foundational charter. On October 7, 2023, thousands of Hamas terrorists invaded internationally-recognized sovereign Israeli territory and slaughtered 1,200 people in a matter of hours, the majority of them civilians. They went door to door, pulling people from their beds, maiming, mutilating, beheading, raping, and burning entire families alive. About 80 of the corpses showed signs of torture. They also took over 200 people hostage, including Holocaust survivors and a 9-month-old. It was the largest massacre of Jews since the Holocaust. Israel is a small country; had October 7 happened in the US, it would be the equivalent of individually slaughtering 50,000 Americans in a matter of hours.

Instead of expressing outrage, there were worldwide celebrations. In the West Bank, Gaza, and elsewhere in the Arab world, candy was handed out on the streets in celebration. In Gaza, thousands gathered to cheer as terrorists paraded mutilated corpses. A group of 3000 United Nations teachers expressed their joy at the murder and mutilation of Israelis, including young children. All over left-wing social media, people celebrated.

On October 8, before any Israeli retaliation whatsoever, crowds of thousands gathered in Times Square to express their support for the murderers, holding signs that declared "decolonization is not a metaphor" and "by any means necessary".

Fringe extremists exist, but this was hardly the fringe. And we know this is not a normal reaction. We did not see entire protests in Times Square in support of the Russian slaughter of Ukranians, 9/11, the ISIS genocide of Yazidis, the slaughter of Yemenis, the slaughter of Syrians, or any other atrocity.

[slide 3] From Day one, we were treated differently: the contextualization and qualification

Secretary General of the United Nations Anthony Guterres' initial response to the October 7 massacre was the following: "It is important to also recognize the attacks by Hamas did not happen in a vacuum."

First, let me make one thing clear: there is no context, in international law or anywhere else, that justifies or minimizes the slaughter, torture, and rape of civilians, including women, children, those with disabilities, and the elderly.

But beyond that, there is a glaring double standard when Israel is the victim of a massacre. Let's take a look at another example of terrorism as a guideline. When ISIS bombed an Ariana Grande concert in Manchester, England on May 22, 2017, killing 22, Secretary General Guterres immediately "strongly condemned" the attack, and the Security Council released a statement, condemning "in the strongest terms the barbaric and cowardly terrorist attack" and extending its solidarity to the United Kingdom. No one said the attack had to be understood "in the context" of the UKs invasion of Iraq, the war against ISIS, or the UKs long history of colonialism in the region, and no one said that it did not happen in a vacuum.

Similarly, on October 7, millions of people rushed to social media to provide "context" for the cold-blooded, purposeful, and indiscriminate murder of civilians. Others, before their "condemnation" felt the need to clarify that they were not supporters of the Israeli government (okay, and?), when they've otherwise strongly condemned atrocities perpetrated on others, without feeling the need to qualify support (or lack thereof) for any other country's government.

[slide 4] From day one, we were treated differently: the victim blaming

On October 7, as the massacre was still unfolding, 31 Harvard University organizations released a statement holding Israel "entirely responsible" for the slaughter of its own citizens. I reiterate: as Israelis were still being slaughtered by the hundreds simply for being Jewish - or for being associated with Jews - we were told that our own slaughter was our fault.

They were not the only ones to do so. Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Syria, Iran, and Iraq blamed Israel for the October 7 slaughter. Black Lives Matter Chicago blamed Israel for the October 7 slaughter. Labor unions across the US blamed Israel for the October 7 slaughter. The list goes on.

After the Israeli newspaper Haaretz published an article in which one anonymous police officer said that the police is looking into the possibility that some of the victims of the Nova music festival were killed by fire from an IDF military chopper, antisemites took the statement out of context, distorted it, and disseminated it all over the media and internet.

In response to the Haaretz article, the Israeli police put out a statement that the investigation was only in regard to police activities on October 7, not military activities, and that as such, they do not have any indication about the harm to any civilians due to any aerial activity there."

Regardless, the conspiracy has taken a life of its own, so much so that Palestinian Authority president Mahmoud Abbas accused Israel of carrying out the massacre. Abbas later retracted his statement. A few other unverified reports have also similarly taken out of context to "prove" that Israel was actually behind its own massacre.

To this day, we are told, in response to released hostage testimony that Israeli women are being raped in the Hamas tunnels, that it's justified because "they were soldiers." For what it's worth, no one's rape is justified - even when they're soldiers.

[slide 5] A few days later came the denial

The 10/7 massacre was live-streamed by the perpetrators on their own social media platforms.

Initially, antisemites celebrated. After more and more heinous, indefensible details started to come out, antisemites started denying it happened at all.

To reiterate: the massacre was live-streamed to social media - by the perpetrators. We all saw it in the early hours of October 7. The perpetrators have gone on to boast about it since. For example, on January 10, the leader of the Hamas political bureau, Ismail Haniyeh, said, "We should hold on to the victory that took place on October 7 and build upon it."

The level of denial - just a few days after October 7 - is so pervasive that Israel had to compile a 47-minute film of footage with the most graphic, dehumanizing video evidence to screen for international reporters, government officials, and more.

But no amount of evidence seems to be enough. No independent investigators are enough. No video footage is enough. No survivor or eyewitness testimony is enough. Why are people denying what's before their very eyes? Why?

[slide 6] Then the one-sided demands.

From October 7, there were already demands on Israel - on Israel, as its civilians were massacred - to ceasefire. These demands came from important voices, including American Congresspeople, groups such as UNICEF, and more. These calls made little, if any, mention of Hamas, the perpetrator of the October 7 massacre.

No other country would be asked, as a slaughter of their people was still unfolding, to lay down their arms.

Since then, the calls for Israel - and only Israel - to ceasefire have been incessant. They have continued even as Hamas vowed, on October 24, that "there will be a second, a third, a fourth" October 7. When asked to clarify, in the same interview, whether they meant the complete annihilation of Israel, the senior Hamas official responded, "Yes, of course."

The calls for Israel to ceasefire continued as Yaha Sinwar, the architect of the October 7 massacre, promised on November 30 that "October 7 was just a rehearsal."

The calls for Israel to ceasefire continued as Hamas violated the terms of the temporary ceasefire every single day between November 24 and December 1.

The calls for Israel to ceasefire as Hamas has fired over 13,000 missiles at Israeli civilians. Even more infuriating, the calls for a ceasefire are often made hand in hand with calls to "globalize the Intifada." An intifada is an armed uprising; it's incompatible with a ceasefire.

The calls for Israel to ceasefire have continued as Hamas has rejected several ceasefires in the past several weeks. At this point, those calling for a ceasefire should be honest: what they care is that Israel ceases, but they are not particularly bothered (or even support) when Hamas fires.

[slide 7] The genocide accusations

There are 153 countries that have signed the Convention of 1948. Before this January, only two had ever been brought to trial before the International Court of Justice. Of the signatories, a number of them have been accused of genocidal acts after signing the Convention, including Azerbaijan, China, the Democratic Republic of the Congo, Ethiopia, Palestine, Sudan, Syria, and more.

Only Israel, however, is put on trial, which is all the more egregious when we consider that the events post-October 7 are in response to a massacre of Israelis that Genocide Watch classified as "an act of genocide."

What's even more egregious is that South Africa, which has brought this case before the ICJ, maintains close relationships with genocidal dictators, including Russia's Vladimir Putin and Sudan's Omar al-Bashir. It is a close ally of the Islamic Republic of Iran, Hamas' patron, which has been brutally oppressing the people of Iran since 1979. South Africa even hosted Hamas officials for a "solidarity" event in December 2023 - two months after the October 7 massacre.

Per the Hamas Ministry of Health, 23,000 Palestinians have been killed in Gaza; Israel claims at least 9,000 of them are Hamas combatants. While any civilian death is tragic, there are far deadlier wars and atrocities happening around the globe right at this very second. In Yemen, nearly 400,000 have been killed and a million have died in a famine. In Syria, over 600,000 have been killed. In the Democratic Republic of the Congo, 6 million have been killed. In Ukraine, at least 100,000 have been killed. The list goes on and on. In many of these cases, the perpetrators of the atrocities - some of them South Africa's closest allies - have explicitly expressed genocidal intent. Yet South Africa hasn't found it necessary to bring them before the International Court of Justice. Only the Jewish state.

[slide 8] Feminist advocates are suddenly silent - or worse, accuse us of lying

Perhaps among the most infuriating responses to the October 7 massacre has been the response of so-called feminists and feminist organizations.

On October 7, and every day since, Hamas weaponized rape as a tool of war, which is not only a war crime, but a crime against humanity. There is a preponderance of evidence, including extensive forensic evidence, eyewitness testimony, perpetrator confessions, and survivor testimony.

Yet the Women's March has not condemned Hamas' weaponization of rape as a tool of war; instead, it has only called for a ceasefire. Me Too has not condemned Hamas' weaponization as a tool of war. UN Women did not condemn Hamas' massacre until December 2, nearly two months after October 7, after intense public pressure from Israelis and the Jewish community.

Angelina Jolie, perhaps the most vocal global activist against the weaponization of rape as a tool of war, has said absolutely nothing about Hamas' war crimes; instead, she has asked Israel to ceasefire.

[slide 9] Double standard: legitimacy

Israel is condemned more than any other nation in the world, but the double standard doesn't end there. Israel's real or perceived crimes are blown out of proportion in comparison to other countries' real or perceived crimes, but the double standard doesn't end there. Israel's suffering is minimized, contextualized, denied, or qualified in comparison to the suffering of other countries, but the double standard doesn't end there. Instead, there is another double standard: everything coming out of Hamas' mouth is immediately taken as fact, while everything that comes out of Israel is questioned.

This is not merely a matter of "feeling" like there is a double standard.

On October 17, an explosion went off at the Al Ahli Hospital parking lot. Within minutes, Hamas claimed that an Israeli airstrike had targeted the hospital, killing 471 people. Israel claimed that a Palestinian Islamic Jihad missile misfired and hit the hospital. But the BBC ran with Hamas' story. This triggered worldwide outrage, inciting anti-Jewish riots in the Arab world and in Russia. Eventually, most international independent investigations corroborated Israel's version of events. But by the time the media retracted its original claim - that is, what Hamas said - it was too late. Two Jews had already been killed in Tunisia in retaliation for a massacre that Israel never actually committed.

Then there is the issue of the hostage videos. Hostage videos are hostage videos because they are made under duress. The hostage is told what to say; otherwise, their life is in danger. Hamas, of course, has coerced the Israeli hostages into saying that they are being treated well. These statements, made with a gun to the head, have been taken as fact, so much so that prominent figures such as Shaun King have gushed over Hamas' so-called "humane" treatment of the hostages (that they brutally abducted after murdering their entire families and friends before their eyes).

Yet, now that over a hundred hostages have been released, and they are no longer under threat from Hamas, they are coming out with stories of abuse and torture. Suddenly, no one believes these accounts, claiming that Israel must have told them what to say. It's absolutely absurd and defies all logic.

[slide 10] support my work

venmo: @rootsmetals cash app: $rootsmetals paypal: @debbie@rootsmetals.com

complete bibliography for this post: patreon.com/rootsmetals

disclaimer: the intent of this post is to educate, raise awareness, and challenge hate speech]

[fuck-hamas-go-israel]

the relief of seeing your own country on this list.

also, the countries who are in support of South Africa are themselves just pure havens of human rights and equal treatment, aren’t they? 🙄

HERE is the list of the 134 countries that are NOT supporting South Africa's 🇿🇦 claims of genocide against Israel 🇮🇱:

🇦🇩 Andorra 

🇦🇴 Angola 

🇦🇬 Antigua and Barbuda 

🇦🇷 Argentina 

🇦🇲 Armenia 

🇦🇺 Australia 

🇦🇹 Austria 

🇧🇸 Bahamas 

🇧🇧 Barbados 

🇧🇾 Belarus 

🇧🇿 Belize 

🇧🇹 Bhutan 

🇧🇦 Bosnia and Herzegovina 

🇧🇼 Botswana 

🇧🇬 Bulgaria 

🇧🇮 Burundi 

🇨🇻 Cabo Verde 

🇰🇭 Cambodia 

🇨🇦 Canada 

🇨🇫 Central African Republic 

🇨🇱 Chile 

🇨🇳 China 

🇰🇲 Comoros 

🇨🇬 Congo 

🇨🇷 Costa Rica 

🇭🇷 Croatia 

🇨🇺 Cuba 

🇨🇾 Cyprus 

🇨🇿 Czech Republic 

🇨🇩 Democratic Republic of the Congo 

🇩🇰 Denmark 

🇩🇲 Dominica 

🇩🇴 Dominican Republic 

🇹🇱 East Timor (Timor-Leste) 

🇪🇨 Ecuador 

🇸🇻 El Salvador 

🇬🇶 Equatorial Guinea 

🇪🇷 Eritrea 

🇪🇪 Estonia 

🇸🇿 Eswatini 

🇪🇹 Ethiopia 

🇫🇯 Fiji 

🇫🇮 Finland 

🇫🇷 France 

🇬🇪 Georgia 

🇩🇪 Germany 

🇬🇭 Ghana 

🇬🇷 Greece 

🇬🇩 Grenada 

🇬🇹 Guatemala 

🇭🇹 Haiti 

🇭🇳 Honduras 

🇭🇺 Hungary 

🇮🇸 Iceland 

🇮🇳 India 

🇮🇪 Ireland 

🇮🇹 Italy 

🇯🇲 Jamaica 

🇯🇵 Japan 

🇰🇪 Kenya 

🇰🇮 Kiribati 

🇰🇵 Korea, North (North Korea) 

🇰🇷 Korea, South (South Korea) 

🇽🇰 Kosovo 

🇱🇦 Laos 

🇱🇻 Latvia 

🇱🇸 Lesotho 

🇱🇷 Liberia 

🇱🇮 Liechtenstein 

🇱🇹 Lithuania 

🇱🇺 Luxembourg 

🇲🇬 Madagascar 

🇲🇼 Malawi

🇲🇹 Malta 

🇲🇭 Marshall Islands 

🇲🇺 Mauritius 

🇲🇽 Mexico 

🇫🇲 Micronesia 

🇲🇩 Moldova 

🇲🇨 Monaco 

🇲🇳 Mongolia 

🇲🇪 Montenegro 

🇲🇲 Myanmar (Burma) 

🇳🇷 Nauru 

🇳🇵 Nepal 

🇳🇱 Netherlands 

🇳🇿 New Zealand 

🇳🇮 Nicaragua 

🇲🇰 North Macedonia (Macedonia) 

🇳🇴 Norway 

🇵🇼 Palau 

🇵🇦 Panama 

🇵🇬 Papua New Guinea 

🇵🇾 Paraguay 

🇵🇪 Peru 

🇵🇭 Philippines 

🇵🇱 Poland 

🇵🇹 Portugal 

🇷🇴 Romania 

🇷🇺 Russia 

🇷🇼 Rwanda 

🇰🇳 Saint Kitts and Nevis 

🇱🇨 Saint Lucia 

🇻🇨 Saint Vincent and the Grenadines 

🇼🇸 Samoa 

🇸🇲 San Marino 

🇸🇹 Sao Tome and Principe 

🇷🇸 Serbia 

🇸🇨 Seychelles 

🇸🇱 Sierra Leone 

🇸🇬 Singapore 

🇸🇰 Slovakia 

🇸🇮 Slovenia 

🇸🇧 Solomon Islands 

🇪🇸 Spain 

🇱🇰 Sri Lanka 

🇸🇪 Sweden

🇨🇭 Switzerland 

🇹🇼 Taiwan 

🇹🇿 Tanzania 

🇹🇭 Thailand 

🇹🇴 Tonga 

🇹🇹 Trinidad and Tobago 

🇹🇳 Tunisia 

🇹🇲 Turkmenistan 

🇹🇻 Tuvalu 

🇺🇦 Ukraine 

🇬🇧 United Kingdom (UK) 

🇺🇸 United States of America (USA) 

🇺🇾 Uruguay 

🇻🇺 Vanuatu 

🇻🇦 Vatican City 

🇻🇳 Vietnam 

🇿🇲 Zambia 

🇿🇼 Zimbabwe

[g0ose-bumps]

A/O/B verse Ghoap

(Dom)Beta!Ghost meets (Sub)Alpha!Soap who's a big flirt. M rated. Canon compliant to codmwii.

When Ghost hears about the new sergeant joining them, he's pays it no mind. Whether the man would be a hindrance or a help, was to be seen. Ghost worked best alone. While he could lead a squad easily, closer partnership was something he always sought to avoid. That said, the likelihood of the man being an annoyance was high and Ghost was not a gambling man.

MacTavish was apparently an Alpha, and Ghost wasn't about to bet on him not challenging Ghost's authority with some typical Alpha bullshite.

The world looked down on anyone who wasn't an Alpha. Betas while appreciated for their lack of pheromonal syndromes, were never one to be looked for leadership. They were seen as the workforce of the world, most higher ranked positions given to Alphas who were generally stronger, faster and some might even say smarter. Omegas weren't even considered for anything but breeding, the poor bastards.

Ghost didn't care about any of it.

Well to be exact, he didn't care insofar as it affected his job. He'd had many a man under his command sniff at him strangely and then open their useless mouth to decry being led by a Beta. Ghost had largely ignored their screeches, too focused on the mission to truly care. Those men never lasted long anyway.

He'd liked being a Beta. The strange smells, heats and ruts Ghost had heard about were just that—bizarre physical urges that created a scene Ghost was keen to avoid. He'd always thought Betas were made superior by not being controlled by their cocks or cunts. Ghost had seen many good men and women led astray by one whiff of something in the air. Emotions fraught on their faces as they abandoned all who they were as people and became savage animals.

The thought made him nauseated. To be at the whims of another person just because they smelt a certain way was pure insanity to him. Ghost was quite happy he never had to deal with any of that Alpha/Omega shite. He'd happily ignore the whole pheromonal debacle if it wasn't so prevalent every time he dealt with a new Alpha.

That's why when he actually does meet the man he's heard so much about–mostly from Price who never stopped bragging about this 'Soap's' achievements, or from Gaz who was apparently bossom brothers of a sort–he's fully taken aback.

He's short, is what he thinks first. Most alphas stood at least 6 feet tall. The sergeant was probably 7 inches shorter than him. Not that he's much to sneeze at either, Ghost being abnormally tall for even Alpha standards. But it's undeniable that for an Alpha, MacTavish was on the smaller side.

The second thing he notes, is that he looks soft. His face is soft, his demeanor is soft and his words are soft. It's an abrupt departure from the lean angularity that made up a stereotypical Alpha. Hell, even Gaz and Price who were both Alphas, had looked to be cut from the same stone. Acted like it too some days, exuding a comfortable confidence that couldn't be faked.

It was Ghost who stood out as a giant among the bunch, made more 'freakish' looking by his height and bulk. Aside from the others in 141, most Alphas felt threatened by him, like he'd try to steal their Omegas or their positions. He'd only laugh when they accused him of just that. Ghost wasn't interested. He never was.

This Alpha, however, takes one glance up at him and offers up his bare neck. Shadowed eyes looking up at him sweetly, pretty lashes fluttering. He gets a soft, "Let's get ourselves a win, yeah, Lt? Save ya a seat, sir..." And a slight tap to his chest (a fistbump of all things!).

Ghost is stunned. He eyes the openly barred neck the sergeant was proudly displaying to him. He's so utterly confused. Alphas tended to guard their neck at all costs. Their neck doubled up as a sensitive place for the bonds they would make or as a weak spot to instantly immobilize them. Offering up ones neck was considered a submission only given to Alphas higher up in their internal rankings or...

Ghost can't even think it. But he does, the sergeant winking at him while Ghost just stands there like an idiot with his mouth gaped open.

A barred neck was an invitation for something more intimate in nature. Something Ghost had only heard about in lurid whispers among the men. It was unheard of to have an Alpha do it for a Beta. It was even more unheard of for an Alpha to do it in plain sight of others, no less in front of the men they were to lead in a mission, 5 minutes from starting. It was dark, but not dark enough for everything to be hidden.

Despite himself, Ghost feels the stirrings of hunger deep within him. He wants desperately to take that smug look off of the Alpha's face, to have him writhing for more. To grab the man and bare his vulnerable throat further. Show Ghost more of that tan skin so carefully hidden amongst thick protective clothes.

He wants to take that submission being offered so prettily by the cocky Alpha right in front of him and cram it down his throat. Have him bouncing in his lap, insensate and screaming for more. Thrust up into that tight arse and watch as he cries fat tears down those soft, soft eyes of his. Then laugh as the Alpha struggles to fit his reddened lips over Ghost's length when he takes his mouth as well and makes him choke on it.

Ghost wants.

Soap takes one last glance at him and smirks. The other man seemed assured of whatever he saw from Ghost. He saunters off towards the transport, head held high. An Alpha to the core despite all the Very Not Alpha Behaviour he'd just shown Ghost.

"Fucking hell..." Ghost groans.

Shepherd barks, "Ghost, you copy?"

A slight pause. "Yes sir." Ghost chokes back, tongue thick in his mouth.

He can hear the worried concern coming from the older Alpha at Ghost's uncharacteristic fumbling.

"Any issues?"

Ghost has so many issues.

"Negative sir, out here." He growls, a headache growing at the thought of all the upcoming missions with Soap.

Fucking hell indeed.

*

[twopoppies]

The double standard in this fandom are nauseating. Larries are seen like the biggest enemies. Insulted, harassed…but others shippers that most of the times are like larries but worse…get a pass.

You know what I mean, Gina? 🙃

Oh, for sure. It’s partly because hating on larries and blaming them for everything has been normalized by 1DHQ and the media since forever. Then, throw in Louis’ ever increasing denials as well as things the other guys have said in print and sprinkle in some homophobia and you’ve got the perfect scapegoat.

[kiironekolady]

So final thoughts on eurovision this year

the people will not be silenced, no matter the narratives and bullshit censorship they try to impose

nauseated but not surprised at the public vote for israel

nauseated and fucking livid at the 12 points the portuguese public gave them

eurovision is always political

you cannot sanitize eurovision, you can only ruin it by trying

remove opaque politically motivated sponsorships

you can't claim to remove russia out of "morals" and then not israel. there have always been countries doing horrible things represented at eurovision but the obvious double standards and hyprocrisy could never fly this year

hey EBU, we will not forget

peace for palestine

[fromthedeskofmuffin]

Far Out

Chapter 17: Cowl

The galaxy turned.

I was now over half a year into my stay at Brock Station. At some point, I realized it had become my home. Navigating the rings of the station was now second nature, and I had at least met everyone on the engineering team. Vulka and I had become good friends, since we still worked together whenever he was on roaming duty. I had even begun allowing others to help me with the Benevolence. So far, it was just Vulka and Listher (since I wasn't the most social person on the station and they both kept pressuring me) but even two extra people on a project as big as the Benevolence was a big deal.

Benni, for its part, surprised me by perfectly playing the part of a standard ship AI. I had forgotten the time it lied to the recovery team, but for some reason, Benni’s ability to act didn’t bother me as much as it probably should have. Other living beings could lie, so Benni had every right to be able to do the same. It was just a matter of trusting it to have good decision making skills, and trusting that it trusted me. 

Work on the Benevolence itself went faster than I had expected. By now, the ship's systems were all fully operational, save for the engines themselves and the CDrive. We had even managed to acquire a new cockpit and install it without any issue. The engines were where we got stuck. Armor plating? No problem, pull it off some salvage and cut to fit. Need a targeting system for your laser turrets and missile clusters? With some advanced coding, you can reprogram one from another ship to fit yours. The problem with the parts we needed now was connections. Proprietary ones. Listher did his best, but every other engine we looked at just wouldn't be able to connect to the Benevolence in a safe and secure way.

“Look, finding Ulthean Heartland-Class gunship engines is harder than you think,” Listher said. The Chief’s Assistant was sitting on a crate next to the Benevolence while I riveted the last of the new armor plating to the hull. “I was able to get you the new cockpit because I already knew a guy who had one. The rest of the ship it was attached to is debris somewhere in deep space. What if we just modified the connections?”

I shook my head, firing the last rivet and stepping back to survey my work. “We'd have to modify too much. I've seen enough of other Frontier engines to know it wouldn't work.”

“Then you'll be docked for a while yet, kid,” Listher said with a shrug. “It’s pretty rare for one of these things to get taken out, much less salvaged.”

That nauseating sense of pride welled in my chest again, and I squashed it immediately. I leaned against the Benevolence and looked at Listher. “What about Pasci engines? You haven't shown me any of those.”

“That's because they're impossible to obtain,” Listher said. The look he gave me was pained as he set his tablet down. “The Pasci are just about the most private engineers I've ever met or heard of. No one works on their ships except other Pasci. No one crews them except for Pasci. Somehow, there hasn't been a single bolt or screw made by the Pasci put on the market, underground or otherwise. Even if they fit perfectly on the Benevolence, I couldn't get you one of their engines if I sold half my eyes. I’m endangered, remember? You know how much one of these goes for?”

“No, and quit pointing, I get it,” I said, rolling my own eye with a smirk. “What's their deal? Weren't they the ones that suggested standardizations in the first place?”

Listher shrugged as he put his hands back down. “You know how it is. Oldest race, best tech. ‘Rules for thee’, ‘you’re not prepared for it’, the usual stuff. They–”

He was cut off as the dock bulkhead opened, and one of the strangest people I'd ever seen slithered through, next to Dr. Skisk. She wore a long and expensive looking head covering over her serpentine head and body (which seemed to just keep going). Six bony arms pulled double duty, gesticulating and pulling her along the ground as she chattered animatedly to the station’s doctor. 

“Oh, is that today?” Listher asked, turning back to look at me. 

I looked back at him with a blank expression. “Was what today?”

Listher and I stared at each other with mounting confusion until he spoke. “Thats. Jessie, thats your cybernetics specialist.”

“Oh! Right!” I said, smacking my head. That was today. Excitement filled my entire body at the thought of finally getting rid of these mechanical braces. Of entering zero gravity again. Then, a shriek from the direction of the approaching duo made us both jump.

“You didn't say they were PaliTech Modulegs Pro™!” 

The cybernetics specialist was suddenly bearing down on Listher and I with the speed and inertia of a rogue asteroid, palms slapping on the ground as her body was dragged behind, occasionally lifting and dropping with a thud to catch up. Dr. Skisk looked shocked, stopping in their tracks. Listher and I both jumped back in surprise. The specialist pulled up short right in front of us, and I finally got a true sense of how big she was. Her body, covered in blue scales, was at least fifteen feet long, and her head loomed a foot and a half over my own, weaving back and forth to get a proper look at me with her blood red eyes.

“Babe, you have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to get my hands in a pair of those,” she said, pointing at my legs. 

“Don’t you mean on?” I asked. Her stare was starting to feel uncomfortable.

“I meant in,” she said with a wink, wiggling her fingers. “You’re Jessie, then? They call me Cowl, so you can too.”

Nervously, I held out a hand, which she shook daintily in reply. My excitement had faded a bit in the onslaught of Cowl, but I didn’t want to pass judgement yet. With a cautious smile, I said, “Nice to meet you. I’ve been looking forward to this for a long time.”

“Well of course you have, my schedule is a mess!” she cried. “There aren't that many of you, but would it kill you Ultheans to stick together a bit?”

I grimaced. “Probably, yeah. It's a bit difficult when we all have to stay under the radar.”

“Yes, well,” Cowl said, waving a dismissing hand. “Just trying to save on fuel costs, is all.”

“Cowl wanted to meet you before the procedure,” said Dr. Skisk, antennae twitching. I hadn't even noticed them walking up. “To see what she would be working with. Sorry, I didn’t expect her to get so excited.”

“How could I not?” Cowl asked, head dipping to Dr. Skisk’s eye level. Then she turned it towards me. “The Modulegs Pro™ are a civilian model! Military cybernetics from Ulthea are common as aluminum on starships. I’ve been begging for a civilian to show up at my airlock for ages!”

“Well, here I am,” I said, spreading my arms and dropping them in a tired motion. “Though, I was a UAN mechanic. We just got a civilian model because we weren’t expected to see combat.”

“Don’t care, too excited,” Cowl said bluntly. She reared her head back up. “My ‘office’ is ready if you are.”

I blinked. “Just like that?”

Cowl shrugged with three of her shoulders. “It's not surgery, babe. Not the meat kind, anyway. No mess, no germs. You'll be in and out in an hour.”

“Oh, wow, okay,” I said, overwhelmed at how fast things were moving. My grin was somewhere between a nervous and excited one as I looked to Listher, who nodded.

“Go for it, you're not on the clock,” he said. “You've been talking a big game about your zero gee skills, so prove it when you get back.”

I nodded back, a little lost for words, then started towards the ship’s bay door. “I’ll just lock up the Benevolence. We were pretty much done for the day anyways.”

Before I knew it, the mechanical braces were off, and I was sitting in an examination chair within a much smaller ship than I had expected. It was decorated with tapestries and soft lighting, in a manner that reflected how she dressed. Life in space had always been about cleanliness, efficiency. My entire life had been enamel, aluminum, and plastic, and any plant life I saw had only been viewed through display screens. Helga’s office was organic, but this was on another level. It was… nice. Softer. The intricate patterns on everything around me were beautiful and fascinating.

Cowl pushed her head through a beaded curtain, and her body followed after. She was calmer now, more composed. Her head still bobbed around as she spoke, but now it was clear she was just trying to maintain polite eye contact with eyes further apart than mine. The smile she gave me was warm and genuine.

“Comfortable, I hope?” she asked.

“I’m okay,” I said, nodding. “This isn’t like my usual cybernetics checkup.”

Cowl ran a scanner over my legs, then checked a tablet she had hung on her shoulder. “I should hope not,” she mumbled. “I’m taking your restraints off, not adding new ones.”

My face darkened. It was still so hard to comprehend the kind of thought that would lead to putting restraint chips inside your citizens cybernetics. The cybernetics that you forced on those citizens. “Why… why would they do this to us?”

Cowl’s expression softened. “It’s all about control, girl. It’s not personal. There’s too many of you to handle with only armed guards and stern words. Have you ever thought about what might happen if everyone on your old station rushed the guards at once? If you tried to take over?”

She had a point. There really weren’t that many guards on the station compared to how many workers there were. “Wouldn’t they just kill all of us, then?” I asked, subconsciously gripping one of my horns. “There’s still the orbital cannons.”

“Of course,” Cowl replied. “But, if they can just press a button and make the resistance stop, they don’t have to waste money building a new station.”

I stared at my legs, eyebrows knotted so tight it almost hurt. It made sense, but it was so cruel. The hurt and betrayal I had felt back when I first escaped hit me like a boulder. Then Cowl poked me in the forehead, and I looked up into a pair of nostrils. 

“Hey. Listen,” she said, before pulling her head back to a more reasonable distance. “You’re out of there, right? You’re taking your legs back. When I’m done, they’ll be yours entirely, and just as good as ever. They lost their grip on you.”

With a sigh, I tried to force myself to relax. “Right. Thank you. At least I’ll have my legs.”

“That’s the spirit!” Cowl said, with enthusiasm. “Now, ready to begin?”

< Previous Chapter | Start | Next Chapter >

[monstersinthecosmos]

Hi Kacy! Question: do you like Lestat? Like, what is your opinion on him? Also I was wondering.. what is your least favorite VC character, and why?

fhjskdglsd lmao he is my least favorite VC character  🥸

But!!!!!!!! There’s some nuance here for me. 

Like, he’s the main narrator so if I TRULY couldn’t stand him I don’t think I’d like the books. I don’t hate Lestat. I also could group the many many many extraneous characters in the back half of the series as my least favorite, too, but it’s fair to say that I don’t care about them. I would’ve enjoyed more content about the characters we already knew and liked instead of having to spend so much time with like all the PL trilogy randos. So, of the main cast, my least favorite is Lestat.

A lot of this is like, subjective and personal and about preference, because we see the double standards in fandom constantly, like why do we give Lestat a pass while we demonize Marius for the same shit, etc. And for me as a Marius Girlie (GN), WHY DO I GIVE MARIUS A PASS ON STUFF LESTAT ALSO DOES? I can’t really explain it, I just don’t like him. LOL.

But what I find really fascinating is that Marius and Lestat are like, the father & son version of the same character. They have SO much in common, and it’s really engaging for me to use Lestat to extrapolate ideas about Marius. I think a lot about how they’re sort of pessimist/optimist versions of each other, too, and how perhaps Lestat’s “nauseating buoyancy” is what allows him to make such terrible, public decisions, vs Marius who has similar bouts of creative frenzy, similar self-loathing cycles, similar uses of ego, but who often crumbles and withdraws into himself without making Lestat-Sized messes. 

And like, how much of this speaks to their inherent personalities vs the lore about your age and temperament? Would Marius have been like this if he’d been turned at 20 when he was still full of verve? If Lestat had made it to 40 would he have calmed down? Was Marius this much of a mess in his first couple centuries, and will Lestat be like this if he makes it to 2000?

As a VC fan in general, I think whenever I’m reading one of Lestat’s books I’m usually really plugged in and enjoying him in the moment, but like, I am so much more invested in the de Romanus bloodline, like, in TVL I am so engaged with Lestat until Armand shows up, and then I’m like NO LET’S SPEND MORE TIME WITH THIS GUY. Same with the Marius chapter, it’s my favorite! And TVA/B&G/Pandora are my favorite. I mostly enjoy the other books, but whenever I do a reread it’s always a relief to make it to de Romanus books. THE DARK TRIAD, if you will.

I get him, too. Like, I get it lol. I get it. But I think by the back half of the series I just get super sick of him, and a lot of it has to do with the way the writing devolves. TVL Lestat is a very different person than Post-MTD Lestat, even PL Lestat, and I think when we start dissecting Anne Rice’s use of him as a Mary Sue it gets really annoying. There’s also like, the huge list of -isms in VC that we’ve discussed to death, and things Anne Rice handled better or worse, and even Post-QOTD Lestat really bugs the fuck out of me with how he treats Louis, and the way he is so plainly abusive to his lovers.

Like, I’m here all day defending Marius/TVA LOL and discussing diegetic kink and brand contamination and telling everyone it’s not that deep, and so this is my flaw as well that I give Marius a pass on stuff that I blame on the writing, vs how I have a hard time giving Lestat the same grace. It’s subjective, in a way, too, because the specific ways Lestat treats Louis are really triggering to me personally, and I have a hard time seeing past it, the way some people have a hard time seeing past Marius, or even a hard time seeing past the way Armand abuses Daniel. We all have little things like that, so I’m not judging anyone who enjoys it, it’s just not for me. I find it easy to understand the non-diegetic BDSM in TVA but less easy to watch the way Lestat treats Louis and David long term, the way his shitty behavior doesn’t get called out, the way Louis never gets to stick up for himself, the way David is so broken and traumatized and terrified of him but we never talk about it again except when Lestat makes a rape joke about it. Etc!!!

He’s just such a terror to everyone in his life, like! I feel sorry for everyone who gets involved with him! He’s traumatic to be around! AND LIKE, THE THEME OF VC IS THAT MESSES & BAD PEOPLE ALSO DESERVE LOVE, but like. Christ lol. He can meet us halfway and work on himself too lol. 

And it's interesting to ask like, when we talk about how Lestat gets a pass in the universe and no one holds him accountable, I think it's fair to analyze points of view and ask if it's simply Lestat withholding any criticism, but like ! idk! He turned a child lol. That happened! Other people met her! TOBT is about how he realizes he's a monster and accepts it, and decides he'd do it again! I love TOBT so much for being such a cool portrait of his evil, really! And it's part of his charm, too, like we like him as a character because he's charming and perhaps people in the universe also always forgive him because he's charming! He's just too irresistible LOL. But there's a turning point where it just starts feeling flat, the charm feels unironic, it doesn't feel like we're seeing him as a charming monster anymore. (This is just me but maybe it's because I get bored and don't analyze the later Lestat books enough.)

By the end it felt like Anne Rice writing silly lil stories about her lil guy, I get it. But I don’t really enjoy that in the writing and so like, I can’t say that I enjoy the Lestat stories too much, and whether it’s diegetic or not, he bugs the fuck out of me LOL.

On a fandom level, too, like, he’s the main character and Loustat is the juggernaut ship. He’s not neglected, there’s plenty of fan content about him. I don’t feel particularly obligated to create works for him or give him more attention, he’s doing fine lol. I don’t think I have anything to say about him that hasn’t been said, and I’m not interested in taking up space in fandom as a salty Lestat hater, so I just leave a polite distance. 

I do like him when I’m in the moment reading his books, I really value him as the main narrator, there are scenes of his that break my heart, Lestat/Nicki is one of my top ships of all time, I love him as a scared boy trying so hard to be good, I love him as a tortured creative person who needs so deeply to be heard, I love him as a baby fledgling who doesn’t know what to do and is so so so scared of losing people, but I also get sick of him and think that, as the main narrator, he shoulders the brunt of the weird writing decisions in the second half, and I’m just over it! Idk! 

[randomthefox]

Movie Shadow looks like a wet rat with a bull-dog mouth. Why do people like this filth.

I honestly don't know

This movie looks like ass

My only conclusion is it's the Sonic Double Standard. Because you know if this was, like, Pokemon or something everybody would be calling out screenshots like this for the nauseating grotesquery that it is.

[sjerzgirl]

Spot on analysis!

[averinna]

The double standard on twitter... Nauseating.

So many guy I want to punch...

So it's why y'all are like this huh... I get it now

Still don't excuse y'all saying that more men should kill themselves tho. If you hate dudebros, hate on dudebros

[androgynous-emo]

Genuinely frustrating how often men are just blatantly slanderised constantly on this site. It's honestly nauseating to see how they're consistently targeted, yet nobody ever seems to talk about ""toxic feminity"" or mention how equally toxic (if not more so) women can be. You're not any better for blaming innocent men for issues they have no control over, you're just as bad as the people you claim to be against. You are just as big of an issue as them.

Nobody is perfect, and this isn't to say all men are innocent. There will always be bad apples. But not all men are the same either. Nobody gets to choose what sex they are born with, and being just as malicious as misogynists does nothing but come off as whiny, annoying, and - more than anything - hypocritical. You're looking for somebody to blame instead of solving the core issues.

Modern feminism is a joke. It's not about equality at all, it's about hating men, only hating men, and encouraging evil double standards they claim to be against yet seem to actively encourage. Get over yourself. You are human, just like your "enemy." Men have feelings too. Maybe people would take you more seriously if you weren't so blatantly trying to encourage male suicides.

Now we wait for the thousands of messages from the exact kind of angry feminists we've mentioned today, because God forbid men be able to be victims of anything.

[uniquejellyfishqueen]

my soul hurts and there are all these words needing out.

The memories won���t come all at once, and now that I realized the aura of a migraine is now connected with a memory surfacing I’m allowing all of that to happen naturally at my mind's own pace. For me they always strike the same place, my eyes. That’s sad in a beautiful way, the memories that I’m supposed to see hurt the things I need to see in the first place. Is this what they meant when they said “I was Blind but Now I See?” So far the memories that have surfaced are ones I had a sense of remembering but now I’m able to see in a more vivid light. These memories have both of my uncles in them. This also makes sense since we grew up in the same house. Ricky is older, he is also the one that has given me a lifelong skill of immediately becoming nauseated if i were to see a merry-go-round (still not sorry about your leather jacket, you asked for it.) He is also the one that took me ice skating for the first time, he was so mad that I threw a hissy fit because I refused to wear anything but my OGI bodysuit. Both of them are featured in the memory of sledding at the Beaver Dam (btw this was illegal right?) my tailbone recovered eventually because from what they said “she caught some air.” Matt was there when my mom ran off to Florida to get married, the day my kitty died, and he also taught me how to drive. The both of them also passed down the gift of music, they might not be labeled as musicians but that's another debate in itself. They know their shit on the topic and they passed it along to me. Mixed with my adhd my Spotify is like a kangaroo monkey all jacked up on MD.

Other memories unfortunately have had the pleasure of coming back on things I remember happening and honestly I wish I didn't. Cringe moments, and attacks are a freaking thing and they make you feel so gross and so unworthy that you just want to crawl into a hole and lay there until you die. Cringe moments, anxiety, depression, you know the list I’m talking about. Mental health comes in all shapes and sizes just like us little people on the game board, oops I mean our lovely Mother Earth. But just like the way we have resulted in treating each other we do the same thing with other people's mental health. But we also do it to our own feelings and mental health. We are our own biggest critic. I want to really emphasize that I know the words others have spoken to me are true, but they aren’t true for me at that moment. This sounds dumb but upon examination of myself in a better sober light I see that I have been spoiled in the fact that I expect to hear what I want, not what I need to hear from the other person. This results in me overreacting and being ignorant to people who “love” me. I can’t change things said in haste, I can’t erase things that should have never happened. But I can start to take ownership of things that I did have a hand in.

To the girls I was a cunt to from the ages of 12 to about 25 I’m sorry that I was insecure due to personal issues that I was unaware I was harboring. Not one rude thing I ever said should have been voiced. I’m sorry that I added to the slut shaming, its already a double standard so if you did get called a slut by me, Girl i hope you enjoyed the D! I'm all about female support now. Unless this were to be with someone my heart was connected to then I would be pretty mad.

To anyone that tried to help me along the way and I pushed you far enough that you walked away, I’m sorry that I couldn’t put in effort too.

There are many other apologies that I should make but there is the time where you put everyone else above yourself all the time and you stop and see that the people you have done that for wouldn’t do it for you. I can’t waste time anymore being sad and apologizing for the actions of other people when I know that deep in my heart I’m worth more than that. I do deserve better than that.

[twopoppies]

Thw double standards in this fandom are nauseating. Larries are hated by everyone since 2010/11 but other shippers get a free pass?! And not just normal shippers. They really believe harry is in a relationship with their fave “men” and no one speaks. But larries are the the biggest enemy! Have you noticed this, Gina??

It’s a song as old as time.

[saccharinesalinity]

𝐚𝐥𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐬: 𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞?

If there was such a thing as a tier for viennoiserie, almond croissants would be at the TOP of that tier because how could they not be? You get all that flakey-ness you'd get from a regular croissant with an additional nuttiness from the almond cream slathered on the inside and top, along with crunchy flaked almonds. What's not to love?

I think I can safely say that the amount of cafes/bakeries in KL and PJ are endless. You've got this whole list of them and right after crossing one off, you've already got a new one to try out. Now of course not every one of these shops serve up viennoiserie, while even fewer offer in-house-made ones. My infatuation for this delightful breakfast pastry has given me the motivation to scour around for the best that KL/PJ has to offer and if I'd go back for seconds. And of course, I'll be dragging my lovely partner along with me!

In this piece, we'll be looking at two of the most well-known bakeries out there, which are: Croisserie and Universal Bakehouse. The former being known for their extensive array of baked goods and desserts, accommodating both sweet and savoury palates while the latter having one of (if not, the) the best loaves of sourdough I've ever had.

First up, Croisserie in Damansara Heights. They boast of a double storey shop lot with the main seating located on the upper floor and a few spots just outside. Aside from the croissant aux amande, we had to get ourselves on some savoury action because admittedly, we're both not at all sweet breakfast people; hence, a triangle cheese, and a mushroom eggplant tartine for later, which are both highly recommended by the way but that's a story for another day.

They warm the pastries for you before you take them upstairs to a table of your choice. By the window is always preferred for good photos.

Now, onto the star of the show.

Visually, it's of a pretty standard size, nothing too big or small. Lines of snow powder sit atop deep golden almond flakes with a noticeable split in the centre. Almond croissants are usually day old croissants revamped because who wants to waste a good croissant? But I guess it's also a way to turn an eh croissant into an ooooh croissant (because that's how I exclaim when something tastes good). This one, however, slightly deviated from traditions. Vanilla-speckled pastry cream lined its interiors rather than creme d'amande. This took me by surprise having expected to be hit with the familiar gritty nuttiness but was greeted instead by smooth lusciousness.

I'm not gonna lie, I wasn't convinced on the first bite; I guess the different filling really threw me for a loop. But by the crunch of the last little nugget, it finally clicked. Everything just made sense. Nothing about the pastry was superlative—it wasn't too rich, too sweet, too nauseating. It was just right and I think I might've been baptized by it.

Fast forward to a half-hour or so later, we're at Universal Bakehouse in Damansara Kim. It was at this time the sun decided to come out from behind the clouds and scream fire at our skin. The fact that this little shop had limited indoor seating didn't help either, thus we were nestled into a corner outdoors by the storefront window.

They graciously heat up the pastry and bring it to the table for us.

And it arrived as marvellous as ever; prominent layers that you could count one by one if you could spare a minute more, golden-brown-to-perfection exterior, and a light snow powder finish on well-toasted almond flakes. The heating up took quite a while but I'll admit it was pretty worth it. The pastry was incredibly flaky and crisp, shattering upon first contact with the buttery-ness coating the entirety of your mouth as the warm almond cream oozes along. It couldn't get more indulgent than this.

This croissant abided traditions with its classic almond centre albeit a little sweet for my liking. A handful more of almond flakes on its crown or a steamy cup of coffee or plain tea (sans sugar and milk) would've offset the sweetness and lent the perfect balance. Overall, if I were to introduce someone to their first almond croissant, Universal Bakehouse's would be it; it's definitely a textbook classic.

To be honest, I'm not entirely sure if it's fair to pit the two against each other. They're clearly bringing two varying intentions to the table through the same form, or in more modern terms: they're the same letters, just in different fonts. They both sell at similar prices with the former at around RM12 and the latter at RM13.6 (both prices inclusive of tax).

Would I purchase them again? Yes, but each with very specific cravings to complement them.

But the hunt is far from over, there are still a few highly-rated bakeries awaiting my visit.

Until next time then!

* Croisserie storefront photo * Universal Bakehouse storefront photo * croissant photos by LTW and yours truly

[hardynwa]

Akeredolu should step aside, or be removed

PRESENTED with another opportunity to raise the bar of democratic governance to global standards, Nigeria’s political leadership, instead dug the country further into a rut. For six months, governance has alternated between abeyance, inertia, and auto-pilot in Ondo State, following the illness of Governor Rotimi Akeredolu, who has been absent from duty and the state capital, Akure. Whereas decorum, and respect for the five million residents of the state demand that the governor step down, party leaders, led by President Bola Tinubu, have elevated party conviviality over public interest. The charade is nauseating; the governor should immediately surrender the reins of government to tend to his health, failing which the state executive council or the legislature should remove him in accordance with the provisions of the constitution. The drama is another setback for Nigeria’s democracy. For over one year, Akeredolu has been very ill. For some time, he relocated to Ibadan, Oyo State, from where he and his inner circle were running Ondo. Later, he flew to Germany for treatment, spending three months in the European country. On his return, his family and aides took him to Ibadan, from where they are pretending that he is running Ondo State. The crisis has deepened with the harassment of the Deputy Governor, Lucky Aiyedatiwa, by Akeredolu’s supporters over internal disagreements, including attempts to impeach him by the Ondo State House of Assembly. Akeredolu, a Senior Advocate of Nigeria, and former president of the Nigerian Bar Association, should respect the law. The 1999 Constitution is clear; he has the option of handing over to his deputy and transmitting that he is taking medical leave of absence to the ODHA. In the alternative, he should resign to tend to his health. Public office calls for selfless public service. His exit now on account of his incapacitation is more beneficial to the state than the current intrigues and administrative gridlock at a time of grave economic, security and social adversity. Tinubu’s and the ruling party’s intervention however elevated party interest above public interest, and global best democratic practices. Their ‘resolution’ asking the Ondo partisans to maintain the status quo; retain the absentee Akeredolu as governor, and stop impeachment moves against Aiyedatiwa, resolves nothing. Governance in Ondo remains in abeyance. Nigerian politicians fail to learn from past mistakes. Nigeria witnessed political gridlock in 2009 when the late Umaru Yar’Adua’s aides and some family members similarly hijacked the Presidency during his sojourn in foreign hospitals. Eventually, it was the invocation of the “doctrine of necessity” that facilitated the elevation of his deputy, Goodluck Jonathan, to the presidency. His successor, Muhammadu Buhari, similarly took frequent foreign medical trips without transmitting power to his deputy, whose sterling performance during the first two trips impressed Nigerians, but infuriated Buhari’s exclusionary inner circle. In one instance, he was away for 171 days. Former Governors Sullivan Chime (Enugu), and Liyel Imoke (Cross River), also each departed their states for long periods. This ghoulish spectacle should be terminated. Illness can afflict anyone. Everyone sympathises with Akeredolu and wishes him full recovery. But it is time to step down from the exacting functions of governor for everyone’s sake. As NBA leader, student union, and civil society activist, he had always insisted on governance best practices. The NBA stoutly called on Yar’Adua to step down in 2009/2010; its recent backing of Akeredolu therefore amounts to double standards. Akeredolu should step aside. Failing that, the ODHA, and the SEC should remove him. Read the full article

[battyaboutbooksreviews]

🦇 Will They or Won't They Book Review 🦇

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

❝ She suddenly understood, with a nauseating surge of regret, what a precious thing she'd been so careless with all those years ago, too blinded by distrust and self-loathing to see it standing right in front of her, if she'd only been brave enough to reach for it. ❞

❓ #QOTD Who is your celebrity crush? ❓

❝ The point was that he loved her now...The kind of love that cast a warm glow back through time, all the way to their first meeting, reframing the past through the lens of the present. Powerful enough to illuminate the protective shell she'd thought surrounded her heart, revealing that it wasn't a shell at all, but a cocoon. Her heart hadn't been calcifying, it had been biding its time, breaking down and rearranging at the molecular level until it was finally safe to burst free and reveal itself, trembling and brilliant and brand new. ❞

💜 From the first chapter, Ava Wilder does an outstanding job at creating the type of sizzling tension and undeniable chemistry of a book you would expect with this title; the type of chemistry that will keep you reading page after page, starved for more. The true feat here is Wilder's tendency to take, restructure, and defy rom-com tropes that easily would have made this story predictable. There's insta-love, but not in the boring, obvious, or nauseating sense we're accustomed to. Focused on the present, the story is an enemies-to-lovers second-chance romance, but when you rewind to the true beginning, it's far more complex than that. There's even a third act break up (which, at the first indication of it, made me put the book down for a second), but NOT; a twist that's so beautifully compromised that I'm shocked I didn't see it. Lilah and Shane have layers upon layers of characterization, making them real and painful and raw in ways that make empathizing with their decisions easy (once you see the whole picture). Lilah's social anxiety gives the story a mental health focus that seems natural amidst the behind-the-scenes chaos of the film industry (and my gf works in film, so I hear about it plenty). Meanwhile, Shane's people-pleaser demeanor is a guise for his insecurities. While they've both earned their fame, we see the double standard between men and women, too. Wilder touches on so many real-world concepts without blatantly telling, instead showing through Lilah and Shane's shared (and separate) experiences. The character growth between them is stunning, but better yet, Wilder leaves them in a place that demonstrates they'll KEEP on growing—whether together or apart.

🦇 Though I have a long list of pet peeve tropes, a miscommunication-powered plot is one of the biggest. The entire story relies on Lilah and Shane failing to express how they're feeling, or saying the wrong things out of anger, or making assumptions because of their failure to communicate. However, I deeply appreciate the solution to put them into couple's counseling, to force them to recognize what they're feeling, and how to communicate it. They progress from therapy to saying the smallest things unprompted outside of therapy—you see their growth and willingness to try as time goes on. However, anyone who's watched Ted Lasso knows good stories don't need to rely on miscommunication; there's real talent in writing adult characters who are beyond that.

🦇 Recommended to fans of sweet, blistering tension, the harsh but tantalizing bite only enemies to lovers can provide, and second-chance romances you can't help but root for.

✨ Vibes ✨ 💔 Lovers to Enemies to Lovers 🎥 Dual POV & Timeline 🎬 Mental Health Focus 🎥 Immediate, Constant Chemistry 💔 Second-Chance Romance

🦇 Major thanks to the author Ava Wilder and publisher Random House for providing an ARC of this book via Netgalley. 🥰 This does not affect my opinion regarding the book.