#the distance from existing plumbing lines

[emergencyplumbingil]

Hose Bibs & Spigots.

We are here to help you with your question about the cost of installing a hose bib or spigot.

The installation cost for a hose bib or spigot can vary based on several factors including location, accessibility, and any additional plumbing work required. This estimate typically includes the labor and materials needed for the installation, such as the faucet itself, fittings, and any necessary pipes or connections. However, please keep in mind that these are general estimates and the actual cost may differ depending on your specific circumstances. Factors like the complexity of the installation, the distance from existing plumbing lines, and any necessary modifications to your home's plumbing system can affect the final cost. To get an accurate price quote for your particular installation, we recommend reaching out to local plumbers or plumbing companies. They will be able to assess your specific requirements and provide you with a more precise estimate based on your individual needs. Remember, hiring a professional plumber ensures that the installation is done safely and correctly, giving you peace of mind and avoiding potential issues with leaks or damage down the line. If you have any further questions or need assistance with finding trusted plumbers in your area, feel free to ask. We are here to help! Disclaimer: The information provided above is for general guidance only. Costs may vary based on factors specific to your installation. It is advised to consult with local plumbers to obtain accurate price estimates for your project.

[thespiritssaidso]

some people do it by the book (but i prefer to go by feel)

Summary: Shawn and Lassiter are undercover at a high-end resort where all visitors get their own private cabin. All the two need to do now is settle in — and chop up some wood to make a fire, of course. 

Notes: okay, so I’m basing this place off of the Big Cedar Lodge (I went there one year with my family on a road trip). I’m not sure if there’s a resort like it in California, but oh well. Currently as I’m writing this, it is 3 in the afternoon and the internet at my job is crappy and won’t let me look at maps without taking forever and a half to load it up. And if anyone knows me then they know that my patience is extremely limited (part of the reason why I’m only good at writing one shots lmao) and I don’t really feel like taking longer than necessary to make sure the made-up place I am writing for the made-up people to stay at actually exists. 

TL;DR this place exists in Branson, Missouri, but I’m too lazy to make sure a place like it also exists in California. 

Anyways, enjoy!! I know we all love a good Shassie at a cabin au.

Flufftober day 8: Chopping and Piling Wood

—————

Lassiter grunted as he swung his ax into the block of wood, chopping it neatly in two. He leaned over and tossed the half still sitting on the block and tossed it onto a small pile that was slowly building up. After throwing the other half onto the pile right after the first, he reached up and wiped a line of sweat beading on his forehead. 

Currently, he and Shawn were undercover as a married couple to investigate a few disappearances that were happening at the Great Pine Lodge. 

The place was as fancy as a cabin in the woods could get. Full plumbing, air conditioning for when it got hot, heaters for when it got cold, a large king size plush mattress complete with expensive feeling sheets and covers. And that was just the cabin. 

About a stone’s throw from where they were staying was a large beautiful lake, with water so clear Lassiter could almost see the bottom. 

The other cabins people were staying at were a decent distance from their own, close enough to see but not close enough to hear the inhabitants if they were inside. 

A paved road — not a gravel road — sat in front of the cabins, shuttle buses on speed dial on the rotary phone sitting on the bedside table inside, so that visitors wouldn’t have to waste their own cars’ gas to go to the dining hall, or the gift shop, or even the arcade (yes, this place had an arcade). 

Lassiter had always dreamed of going here one day. It was the perfect vacation spot for him and Shawn; fine dining, a beautiful view, activities the both of them would enjoy. 

But now was not the time for dreaming of a perfect vacation (although hopefully there’d be some time left for them to do so). Now was time for investigation. Or more aptly, chopping firewood, in Lassiter’s case. 

Before chopping another log, Lassiter stopped to reroll his sleeves that were slowly unraveling themselves. At the moment, all he was wearing was the button up he normally had on under his jacket, the pants to match said jacket, and his work shoes. He probably should’ve put a little more thought into his wardrobe. 

Too late. He’d committed and now he had to stick with it. Lassiter was just glad that Shawn was still unpacking inside. He was always self-conscious about his arms, how much of a stick he looked when he wasn’t wearing something loose — like his suit jacket. 

He looked at his biceps with disdain. It wasn’t like he was weak and couldn’t lift anything. His muscles just never showed unless he flexed them, hiding like some kind of sleeper agent, or whatever they were calling it nowadays. 

Whatever. So long as no one was here to see him make an idiot of himself trying to chop wood. Lassiter was eventually able to cut them into halves once he figured out a comfortable rhythm, but the start was just godawful. His first swing into the first log didn’t have enough weight behind it and was at an awkward angle, so it had bounced away from the wood and left only a small dent. His second swing was too strong and split right between the log and lodged itself into the chopping block. 

But he was better now, after cutting for what felt like hours, though realistically it had probably been thirty minutes. 

After placing another log down, Lassiter prepared to swing the ax once more when-

“That is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.” 

Lassiter nearly jumped out of his skin. There, leaning against the door was none other than his boyfriend. From what he could see, it looked like Shawn made himself a mug of something warm, judging by the faint steam emanating from it. Tea? Coffee? Hot cocoa? Probably the latter, knowing his boyfriend’s taste for sweet things. 

Lassiter felt the tips of his ears warm, and he knew they’d gone red. “How long were you standing there for?” 

“Ah, time is irrelevant-”

“Shawn.” 

“At least ten minutes.”

Ten minutes. Ten minutes of just watching him swing an ax at wood. Lassiter had no clue what he looked like when he was cutting wood, but he was probably ridiculous. Shawn had probably seen every mistake he’d made. 

Lassiter turned back around, doing his best to ignore the way Shawn was staring at him and lifted the ax once more. He swung with precision and split the log neatly. “Don’t lie, Shawn.” He said, referring to what Shawn had said that startled him. “You know I hate it-”

“What? No no no! Carly, I’m being serious! Look, this is my serious face.”

He didn’t look, not wanting to see his boyfriend who was most likely holding back laughter. He didn’t say anything either, simply returning to the task at hand. Although now he knew he had an audience, which somehow made swinging an ax ten times harder than it was originally. 

There was quiet, uncharacteristic for Shawn. Only the crunching of dead leaves and the swish of grass told Lassiter that he was walking over to him. 

“Back up. I don’t want to accidentally hit you with the-”

“Carlton, look at me. Lemme see those baby blues.” 

At the use of his name, Lassiter turned his head to Shawn. The lack of a nickname and his tone told the detective that he really was being serious. 

And he was right. Lassiter couldn’t remember the last time the otherwise childish man looked this serious about something. He said nothing as he looked into Shawn’s eyes, grass green grounding him. He dropped the ax, a dull thud breaking the quiet. 

“I love all of you, Carly. Doesn’t matter how much you hate it, I look and see you. I don’t see flaws, I see the sexiest body a man could ask for.”

Lassiter couldn’t help the grin, or the tiny laugh that bubbled out at the last thing Shawn said. “Alright, if you say so.” 

“I do say so, and my word is law. You should know this by now, Carlytown.” Shawn stated matter-of-factly. 

This time, Lassiter let out a snort at his boyfriend’s statement. “Is that right?”

“It is.” 

“Mhm. By the way, did you finish unpacking our stuff?” If his calculations were correct, Shawn had taken all of twenty minutes. And from past experience Lassiter knew that it took him at least an hour to get everything perfectly situated for the both of them. 

“We can do that later, I know you have a specific way you like to have your toothbrush set up. Right now there’s a suspect somewhere that’s begging to get caught.” 

“I’m not sure any criminal actually wants to get caught.”

“Really? Because I’m sensing they’re at the arcade right now, writing a secret message in morse code at the game where you have to shoot down those rubber ducks.” 

“Are they, or do you just want to go play games?” 

“That’s neither here nor there. Point is, I’ve already called a shuttle to pick us up and take us to the main building. They should be here in about… five minutes?” 

Lassiter stared at him incredulously. “Five- five minutes? And you’re only telling me this now because why?” That just barely left him with enough time to get out of his sweaty button up and into something clean. It was just the arcade, but he’d prefer to go out without smelling weird in public. 

“Well, I would have told you earlier, but I just couldn’t stop watching you chop that wood. Seriously, Carly, you have no idea how hot you looked swinging that ax.”

“I- alright, fine. Could’ve used more warning time, but it’s fine. Where’d you put my clothes?” 

“In the dresser on the left of the bed, everything’s in the top drawer.”

��————

Notes: yeah yeah yeah, the name of the place they’re staying at is just a rip from the place I based it off of. Sue me. 

oh and the title is a lyric in C'mon Girl by Red Hot Chili Peppers, i couldn't come up with an actual title by myself, sorry

ao3 link

[haveyoureadthispoll]

THE PAST... Caught behind the lines of Hitler’s Final Solution, Saul Laski is one of the multitudes destined to die in the notorious Chelmno extermination camp. Until he rises to meet his fate and finds himself face to face with an evil far older, and far greater, than the Nazi’s themselves... THE PRESENT... Compelled by the encounter to survive at all costs, so begins a journey that for Saul will span decades and cross continents, plunging into the darkest corners of 20th century history to reveal a secret society of beings who may often exist behind the world's most horrible and violent events. Killing from a distance, and by darkly manipulative proxy, they are people with the psychic ability to 'use' humans: read their minds, subjugate them to their wills, experience through their senses, feed off their emotions, force them to acts of unspeakable aggression. Each year, three of the most powerful of this hidden order meet to discuss their ongoing campaign of induced bloodshed and deliberate destruction. But this reunion, something will go terribly wrong. Saul’s quest is about to reach its elusive object, drawing hunter and hunted alike into a struggle that will plumb the depths of mankind’s attraction to violence, and determine the future of the world itself...

[raahgroupinc123]

Enhancing Efficiency and Safety: The Pro Pipe Gripper Tool

Introduction: In industries where pipe handling is a critical component of daily operations, having the right tools can significantly impact efficiency, safety, and productivity. One such tool that has revolutionized pipe handling tasks is the Pro Pipe Gripper Tool. Designed to streamline pipe handling operations and improve workplace safety, this innovative tool offers a range of benefits for industrial applications. In this blog, we'll explore the features, advantages, and applications of the Pro Pipe Gripper Tool and its role in enhancing efficiency and safety in various industries. 

Streamlined Pipe Handling: The Pro Pipe Gripper Tool is engineered to simplify and expedite pipe handling tasks, offering a range of features designed for efficiency: 

Versatile Grip: The tool's gripper mechanism is designed to securely hold pipes of various sizes and configurations, providing versatility and adaptability for different applications. 

Quick Attachment: With its quick-attach design, the tool can be easily attached to cranes, forklifts, or other lifting equipment, allowing for seamless integration into existing workflows. 

Remote Operation: Some models of the tool feature remote operation capabilities, enabling operators to control pipe handling tasks from a safe distance, reducing the risk of accidents and injuries. 

Durable Construction: Constructed from high-quality materials, the tool is built to withstand the rigors of industrial environments, ensuring long-lasting performance and reliability. 

Enhanced Safety Features: Safety is a top priority in any industrial setting, and the Pro Pipe Gripper Tool offers several safety features to protect workers and prevent accidents: 

Secure Grip: The tool's gripper mechanism ensures a secure hold on pipes during handling, minimizing the risk of slippage or dropped loads. 

Anti-Slip Coating: Some models of the tool feature an anti-slip coating on the gripper surfaces, further enhancing grip and stability, even in wet or slippery conditions. 

Overload Protection: Built-in overload protection mechanisms prevent the tool from lifting loads beyond its capacity, reducing the risk of equipment damage and operator injuries. 

Applications Across Industries: The versatility and adaptability of the Pro Pipe Gripper Tool make it suitable for a wide range of industries and applications: 

Construction: In construction projects involving plumbing, HVAC, or pipeline installation, the tool simplifies the handling of pipes, fittings, and connectors. 

Manufacturing: In manufacturing facilities, the tool facilitates the movement of pipes and tubing along assembly lines, streamlining production processes. 

Warehousing and Logistics: In warehouses and distribution centers, the tool aids in the loading and unloading of pipes from trucks, optimizing material handling operations. 

Conclusion: The Pro Pipe Gripper Tool is a valuable asset for industries where pipe handling is a critical aspect of operations. By streamlining pipe handling tasks and enhancing safety standards, this innovative tool helps businesses improve efficiency, productivity, and workplace safety. 

[brwbathroomrenovatorswarehouse]

Australian made vanities for sale Adelaide

Find a one-of-a-kind layout of Australian-made vanities for sale Adelaide only from Bathroom Renovators Warehouse (BRW). Such top-of-the-line vanities, especially for the restrooms help to increase the aesthetic appeal of the bath zone when compared to the overall design of the house. Homeowners need to take guidance from professionals for designing their bath sinks with tailor-made layouts. In this case, considerations should be made for optimizing the size and design of the vanity. Moreover, one can also assess the specific plumbing needs for the sink, along with the existing floor space, electrical outlets, and the distance between the vanity and adjoining walls. What’s more! Such vanities can also be selected in ultramodern, traditional, and transitional styles. Reach out to us at www.brwsa.com.au

[servicewizard]

Encouraging sustainability with HVAC contractors

During the summer, a split system air conditioner is a fantastic choice for keeping your house cool and cozy. In addition, these units need less installation effort, produce less noise, and use less energy than central air conditioning. Since this kind of air conditioning is ductless, all you need to do is place the compressor and condenser unit outside and the cooling unit inside, then connect the two with power cables and pipes. If you have some plumbing and electrical knowledge and don’t want to employ a professional, you can perform the split system air conditioner installation by yourself. Although every air conditioner is different from the one made by its manufacturer, the installation procedure is generally the same.

Steps to install a split system Air conditioner installation.

Installing a split AC can be challenging, but it’s essential to choose the right area for optimal performance.

A strong wall should accommodate both indoor and outdoor units, with a 15 cm distance between them.

Fix the mounting plate and drill an outlet hole for the indoor unit.

Mount the indoor unit by removing the front cover and connecting the copper pipes, drainage pipe, and wire through the hole.

Bind them together with electrical tape and mount the AC. For the outdoor unit, cose a distance of 30-35 centimetres and avoid direct sunlight or dusty areas.

Proper split system Air conditioner installation ensures low efficiency and energy consumption.

To install a Ductless 12,000-18,000 BTU Air conditioning unit, drill holes for brackets and secure them with fasteners.

Mount the outdoor unit on the bracket, ensuring screw holes coincide. Bolt the unit firmly.

Connect the power cable to the outdoor unit according to the manufacturer’s instructions.

Clean the copper pipes before connecting them to the corresponding pipe port with flare nuts.

Open gas valves and follow manufacturer’s instructions.

Benefits of split system Air conditioner installation.

Listing some advantages of split system Air conditioner installation to for an efficient lifestyle

Split system air conditioning units are a cost-effective and easy-to-install option for both residential and commercial spaces.

They are designed to blend in with a room, requiring only a small copper tube and some cabling.

Outdoor units can be placed close to the wall, ensuring the compressor is concealed and can be installed by a registered air conditioning technician in a few hours.

Installing a split AC does not require windows, making them suitable for installation in any room.

Wall mounted units are ideal for investment properties due to their low cost and long-term energy savings.

Maintenance is easy, with only a monthly filter replacement.

The system is also safer than traditional heaters, making it suitable for winter months.

Split system air conditioners  ensures noise-free process, making them suitable for bedrooms and study areas.

They can be set on a timer to maintain a specific temperature for optimal comfort.

Repairing your ductless AC systems.

What is a ductless air conditioner?

An air conditioning system without ductwork is called ductless air conditioning. Rather, it makes use of separate air handlers that are fixed to your home’s ceiling or walls. Refrigerant lines link these air handlers to an outside unit.

For homes without existing ductwork or for spaces that are hard to cool with central air conditioning, ductless air conditioners are a great choice. Additionally, they use less energy than conventional air conditioning systems, which lowers your energy costs.

It’s crucial to keep in mind that, like an air conditioner, ductless air conditioning systems require routine maintenance and repairs, whether you currently own one or are thinking about getting one. Get your ductless AC serviced twice a year and change the air filter on a regular basis to maintain it operating efficiently. Hire experts for ductless system repairs or routine maintenance by getting in touch with expert ductless AC repair services right away.

Expert repair services offers all the ductless air conditioning services including installation and repairs that you require in Austin. Their dedication lies in offering cost-effective and eco-friendly home comfort solutions to you.

For clients who wish a split system Air conditioner installation without sacrificing comfort, the energy-efficient Mitsubishi-split systems are the ideal ductless air conditioning solution. If your home already has a ductless system, pick a team that values your comfort just as much as an Air conditioner repair Austin does.

Maintain your Air conditioner systems with best HVAC contractors.

As the weather warms up, it’s important to hire an Air Conditioner maintenance Austin. These include hissing, banging, grinding sounds, reduced airflow from vents due to dirt and dust build-up, and constant running but insufficient cooling. A comprehensive A/C maintenance plan can extend the unit’s life, prevent costly repairs, and improve efficiency, leading to lower energy bills. A well-maintained unit is less likely to break down during heatwaves, preventing discomfort. Regularly replacing air filters is crucial, as dirty filters can restrict airflow and cause issues like decreased efficiency and increased energy bills. HVAC contractors Austin TX can help select suitable filters, clean coils and drains, and check for refrigerant leaks. Regularly checking the thermostat is also essential, as it regulates temperature and can lead to increased energy bills and decreased efficiency.

Conclusion

Split system air conditioners are cost-effective, easy-to-install, and noise-free options for residential and commercial spaces. They require less installation effort, produce less noise, and use less energy than central air conditioning. Benefits include low cost, long-term energy savings, easy maintenance, safety, noise-free operation, and timer settings. Ductless air conditioners require routine maintenance and repairs. Expert HVAC contractors in Austin TX can help select filters, clean coils, and check for leaks.

[bathroomstoragesolutionspa]

How to Measure Bathroom Sink Size: A Comprehensive Guide

Choosing the proper bathroom sink for your space is crucial for functionality and aesthetics. To ensure an excellent fit and optimal bathroom use, measuring the sink size accurately is essential. Here's a comprehensive guide on how to measure bathroom sink size. These steps can help you make informed decisions before selecting your new best bathroom sink, from measuring the width and depth to considering the installation type and clearance requirements.

Measure the Width and Depth

The width and depth of the bathroom sink are two key measurements to consider. Start by measuring the width, which refers to the distance from one side of the sink to the other. Use a tape measure to measure the outer edges of the sink, including any protruding features, such as the faucet handles. Next, measure the depth of the sink, which is the distance from the front edge to the back. Place the tape measure at the inside bottom of the sink and extend it vertically to the rim. These measurements will help you determine the overall size and ensure the sink fits comfortably within the available space.

Consider the Installation Type

Bathroom sinks come in various installation types, requiring different measurements and considerations. The typical installation types include drop-in sinks, under-mount sinks, wall-mounted sinks, pedestal sinks, and vessel sinks. For drop-in sinks, measure the dimensions of the countertop cutout where the sink will be placed. Undermount sinks require measurements of the inside dimensions of the cabinet or countertop opening. Wall-mounted sinks should be measured from the wall to the front edge of the sink. Pedestal sinks typically have a different base and sink component, so calculate both individually. Vessel sinks are placed on top of the countertop, so measure the available countertop space where the sink will sit. Understanding the specific requirements for each installation type will ensure you select a sink that fits seamlessly into your bathroom design.

Determine Clearance Requirements

When measuring bathroom sink size, it's essential to consider the necessary clearance requirements. Clearances ensure enough space around the sink for comfortable use and easy installation. Measure the distance between the sink and adjacent fixtures, such as toilets, bathtubs, or cabinets. This will prevent any obstructions and allow for smooth movement in the bathroom. Additionally, consider the space needed for faucet installation and operation. Measure the distance from the center of the faucet hole to the edge of the sink to ensure enough clearance for the faucet to function correctly.

Account for Plumbing Fixtures

Taking into account the plumbing fixtures is essential when measuring bathroom sink size. Measure the location and size of the existing drain opening and water supply lines. Ensure that your new best bathroom sink will align with the existing plumbing connections to avoid costly modifications or relocations. The drain opening should match the sink's drain hole size or be slightly larger for proper drainage. Measure the distance between the drain opening and the wall or back edge of the sink. This will help determine if there is enough space for the sink and plumbing fixtures to coexist harmoniously.

Consider User Comfort and Accessibility

In addition to the physical dimensions of the sink, it's essential to consider user comfort and accessibility. The height of the sink should be appropriate for the users, allowing for comfortable handwashing and minimizing strain. Measure the distance from the floor to the top of the sink to ensure it suits the intended users, whether adults, children, or individuals with mobility challenges. Accessibility guidelines recommend a sink height between 32 to 34 inches for most users. Additionally, consider the overall depth of the sink bowl to ensure that it provides sufficient space for handwashing and prevents excessive splashing.

Accurate measurement of bathroom sink size is crucial to ensure a proper fit and functional layout in your bathroom. You can make informed decisions when selecting a new bathroom sink by following these steps and considering factors such as width, depth, installation type, clearance requirements, plumbing fixtures, and user comfort. Remember to measure carefully, account for necessary clearances, and align with existing plumbing connections. By doing so, you will create a well-designed and functional bathroom space that meets your needs and enhances the overall aesthetics of your home.

[benandgaws]

BEN & GAWS LEGAL - HOW TO INSTALL AN UNDERGROUND WATER STORAGE TANKS 

In many places of the world, there is a growing concern about water scarcity. Individuals and towns are increasingly looking to underground water storage tanks as a dependable answer to this problem. These tanks offer a resource-efficient way to preserve rainwater or other water sources for later use. This blog will lead you through the process of setting up an underground water storage tank while you follow the adventures of Ben and Gaws, two made-up characters who will act as role models for you as we go along. In this comprehensive guide, we will walk you through the process of installing an underground water storage tank. Whether you want to conserve water, collect rainwater, or have a backup water supply, an underground storage tank can be a great solution. So, let's dive right in!

Step 1: Site Selection

Choosing the location for an underground water storage tank is the first stage in the installation process. Here are some important things to think about:

Your underground water storage tank's location selection is a crucial step in assuring its long-term operation and efficiency. We will follow Ben and Gaws through the site selection process in this chapter as they take into account numerous aspects that affect the installation's success.

a. Evaluating Property Features

For the purpose of choosing the best position for the underground water storage tank, Ben and Gaws legal first assess their land. Here are some crucial factors to remember:

Property Layout: They evaluate the space that is available and choose locations where the tank will fit. Considerations should be made for things like property lines, existing buildings, utilities, and landscape components.

Ben and Gaws legal seek a position that allows for simple access for upkeep, repairs, and inspections. They make sure that there are no obstructions, such as trees, fences, or other structures, in the way of the tank.

Understanding the composition of the soil is important since it can affect the stability of the tank. Ben and Gaws Reviews test the soil to ascertain its drainage capabilities, load-bearing capabilities, and any potential problems like excessive groundwater levels or soil erosion hazards.

b. Water Sources and Methods of Collection

In order to streamline the site selection process, Ben and Gaws Reviews then take into account the water source and collection techniques.

The ability of the property to collect rainwater is assessed, and places with efficient discharge from roadways, roofs, or other impervious surfaces are noted. They give preference to sites that don't require a lot of plumbing or additional drainage systems.

Distance from Alternative Water Sources: If boreholes or wells are an option, Ben & Gaws evaluate how far they are from probable tank locations. They pick a location that reduces the length of the pipes that join things up, cutting down on energy needs and potential water loss.

c. Regulatory Compliance and Safety

Ben & Gaws are aware of the importance of adhering to local regulations and ensuring safety during the installation process.

Building Codes and Permits: They research and understand the local regulations governing the installation of underground water storage tanks. They apply for any necessary permits and ensure compliance with building codes, setbacks, and other relevant guidelines.

Safety Considerations: Safety is a priority for Ben & Gaws legal. They avoid locations near utilities, septic tanks, or underground cables to prevent potential damage during excavation. Additionally, they consider the proximity to sensitive areas like watercourses or protected habitats.

Step 2: Excavation

Now it's time to bring Ben & Gaws legal into the picture. Ben, an experienced contractor, is skilled in excavation, while Gaws is a DIY enthusiast who will assist him throughout the installation. They start by marking the designated area and carefully excavating the site to the required depth and dimensions. They take into consideration any safety measures necessary during the excavation process.

Once you have selected the site, it's time to excavate the area. Follow these steps:

Obtain any necessary permits or clearances from the local authorities.

Mark out the area where the tank will be placed.

Use appropriate digging equipment to excavate the area to the required depth and dimensions.

Remove any rocks, debris, or vegetation from the site.

Step 3: Tank Installation

Now that you have prepared the site, it's time to install the underground water storage tank. Here's what you need to do:

Carefully lower the tank into the excavated area using lifting equipment or machinery.

Ensure that the tank is level and properly aligned.

Secure the tank by backfilling the space around it with compacted soil.

Leave enough space around the tank for future maintenance, plumbing connections, and proper ventilation.

Step 4: Plumbing and Connections

Plumbing and connections are critical aspects of installing an underground water storage tank. Proper installation ensures efficient water flow, prevents leaks, and facilitates maintenance. In this guide, we will explore the plumbing and connection process, following the journey of Ben & Gaws Reviews, our fictional characters who are installing an underground water storage tank. After the tank is securely installed, it's time to connect it to your water system. Here's what you need to do:

Install a suitable pump, filter system, and pressure tank to ensure proper water flow and pressure.

Connect the underground tank to your existing water supply or rainwater harvesting system.

Install a water level indicator or gauge to monitor the water level in the tank.

Ensure that all plumbing connections are properly sealed to prevent leaks.

Gathering the Required Materials:

Before beginning the plumbing and connection process, Ben & Gaws Reviews gather the necessary materials. This includes pipes (PVC or HDPE), fittings, valves, adapters, gaskets, sealants, and any specialised components required for the specific tank and system design.

Designing the Plumbing Layout:

Ben & Gaws Reviews carefully plan the plumbing layout based on the tank's inlet and outlet positions, as well as any additional features like filtration systems or overflow prevention mechanisms. They consider the desired water flow, the distance to be covered, and the elevation changes in the system. This planning ensures an efficient and reliable plumbing setup.

Installing Inlet and Outlet Pipes:

The next step involves installing the inlet and outlet pipes to facilitate the flow of water in and out of the underground tank. Ben and Gaws measure and cut the pipes to the required lengths, ensuring a proper fit. They use appropriate fittings and connectors to join the pipes, ensuring tight connections. They also incorporate valves for control and shut-off purposes.

Step 5: Finishing Touches and Testing

In the final stages, Ben and Gaws legal pay attention to the aesthetics of the installation. They level the area around the tank, considering landscaping options to seamlessly integrate the tank into its surroundings. Once the installation is complete, they thoroughly test the system, checking for leaks, ensuring proper water flow, and verifying that all features and connections are functioning correctly.

Conclusion

Installing an underground water storage tank can provide you with a reliable backup water supply, reduce reliance on the municipal water system, and minimise water wastage. By following the steps outlined in this guide and seeking professional assistance from Ben and Gaws legal, you can successfully install and maintain an underground water storage tank. Enjoy the benefits of this eco-friendly solution and contribute to a more sustainable future!

[toiletroomneeds]

What are the best upflush toilets?

Choosing the right toilet for your home can be a daunting task, especially when you have limited space or need a system that can handle waste from below the main sewer line. That's where upflush toilets come in handy. These specialized toilets can pump waste upwards and into your home's existing plumbing system, making them a great solution for basements, cabins, or any space where traditional plumbing isn't feasible. In this article, we'll take a look at some of the best upflush toilets available on the market today.

1. Saniflo SaniPlus

The Saniflo SaniPlus is a top-of-the-line upflush toilet that is known for its powerful flushing system and quiet motor. It features a macerating unit that can handle waste from a toilet, sink, or shower, making it a great choice for a bathroom in a basement or other below-ground level. The unit is easy to install and comes with a three-year warranty, giving you peace of mind that your investment is protected.

Liberty Pumps Ascent II

The Liberty Pumps Ascent II is another highly-rated upflush toilet that is designed for residential use. It features a powerful motor that can pump waste up to 25 feet vertically and 150 feet horizontally, making it a great choice for larger homes or commercial applications. The Ascent II also has a compact design that allows it to fit in tight spaces, and it comes with a three-year warranty.

Thetford Bathroom Anywhere

The Thetford Bathroom Anywhere is a cost-effective upflush toilet that is perfect for those on a budget. It features a macerating pump that can handle waste from a sink, shower, or toilet, and it can pump waste up to 18 feet vertically and 150 feet horizontally. The toilet is easy to install and comes with a one-year warranty, making it a great choice for those who want a reliable upflush toilet without breaking the bank.

SaniAccess3

The SaniAccess3 is a high-end upflush toilet that is designed for commercial use or large residential properties. It features a powerful motor that can pump waste up to 15 feet vertically and 150 feet horizontally, and it can handle waste from multiple fixtures in a bathroom. The SaniAccess3 also has a sleek design that can blend in seamlessly with any bathroom decor, and it comes with a two-year warranty.

Kohler K-4000

The Kohler K-4000 is a compact upflush toilet that is perfect for those who have limited space in their bathroom. It features a macerating pump that can handle waste from a toilet and a sink, and it can pump waste up to 12 feet vertically and 100 feet horizontally. The toilet has a modern design that can fit in with any bathroom decor, and it comes with a one-year warranty.

In conclusion, there are many great upflush toilets available on the market today. Whether you're looking for a high-end system for commercial use or a cost-effective option for your home, there is a toilet out there that will meet your needs. Be sure to consider factors such as vertical pumping distance, horizontal pumping distance, and warranty when making your selection. With the right upflush toilet, you can enjoy a fully-functional bathroom no matter where you are in your home.

https://toiletneeds.weebly.com/ https://www.reusealways.com/post/251832_what-are-the-best-water-saver-toilet-water-conservation-has-become-a-increasingl.html

https://www.easyfie.com/post/1568575

[waterfiltergurus]

Is Colorado Springs Tap Water Safe To Drink in [year]?

Is the water in Colorado Springs safe to drink? How clean is tap water in Colorado Springs? Where does the drinking water in Colorado Springs come from, and are there any contaminants in the water that exceed EPA or SDWA guidelines? You'll find all this information and more in this guide to Colorado Springs tap water quality and safety. 📌 Key Takeaways: - The drinking water in Colorado Springs, Colorado is considered generally safe to drink. - The City of Colorado Springs water contains 20+ contaminants, all of which are present in legally safe amounts. - The 3 biggest problem contaminants in Colorado Springs drinking water are disinfection byproducts, radium, and uranium. 🚰 Can You Drink Colorado Springs Tap Water? So, is Colorado Springs water safe to drink? Yes, you can drink Colorado Springs tap water because the City's water supplier filters and disinfects the water before distributing it to homes. This water treatment reduces contaminants down to legal trace concentrations and kills microorganisms, reducing the likely health effects of poor-quality water. The water in Colorado Springs is safe to drink according to EPA Standards. Under the Safe Drinking Water Act (SDWA), the EPA produced drinking water standards that impose limits on the concentrations of various contaminants with known health effects in water. None of the contaminants detected in Colorado Springs water are present above these EPA Standards, which means that the water is legally safe to drink. Plus, the most recent EPA ECHO database shows that Colorado Springs Utilities didn't violate the Safe Drinking Water Act between April 2019 and June 2022, and the most recent violation was resolved back in 2018 - good news for customers who rely on the City's water for drinking. So, on the surface, Colorado Springs Utilities is doing everything right, treating the City's water to make it safe for drinking - but does legally safe mean completely safe? Some organizations, like the Environmental Working Group (EWG), would disagree. The EWG believes that the EPA's guidelines are too lenient, so public water systems that are technically legally compliant may still be exposing customers to dangerous levels of certain contaminants. This isn't helped by the fact that the EPA doesn't even regulate a number of potentially harmful impurities, including many disinfection byproducts and VOCs. Based on its own research, the EWG has established Health Guidelines for all the contaminants it deems to have health effects - and these Guidelines are a lot stricter than EPA enforcement. The EWG has produced a Tap Water Database for Colorado Springs, which highlights 10 contaminants that exceed the organization's Health Guidelines (we've discussed these in more detail later). One of the contaminants that massively compromises water safety is lead. Lead pipes were common in old water supply systems, and while the use of lead has now been banned for this purpose, many existing lead water pipes remain. We couldn't find any specific information about the lead pipes in Colorado Springs, but a 2022 news article reported that in the whole of Colorado, there are still around 80,000-90,000 lead service lines in the distribution system. This could mean you're unknowingly exposed to lead in your water - and considering the dangers of this toxic heavy metal, we strongly recommend conducting a water test if you're unsure. Homes built before 1978 may also have lead in their plumbing systems, so again, test your water if you have any reason to be concerned. 🗺️ Where Does the Tap Water in Colorado Springs Come From? Colorado Springs water originates predominantly in the Fountain Creek Watershed. This basin extends 927 square miles from Pueblo to Palmer Lake. The City doesn't have a natural source of water, which means that 80% of the water is distributed over a 200-mile distance in pipes from the western slope. City representatives admit that more work is needed to protect and restore the local watershed, which has been subject to the effects of fires, flooding, and rapid development over the past few years. The main water source in Colorado Springs is surface water. Surface water is exposed to the elements, making it more prone to pollution from runoff and air particles than groundwater (such as well water or spring water). However, most of the City's water comes from high-country snowmelt, which reduces its likelihood of pollution. Once collected, water in the City is treated by Colorado Springs Utilities. Treatment processes include coagulation, flocculation, filtration, sedimentation, and disinfection with chlorine. Polymer and aluminum sulfate are also added to the water during treatment. These chemicals bind with dirt particles and other foreign matter, helping them to form large clumps that can be easily removed with filtration. The City's water supply isn't fluoridated - the only fluoride found in the water is naturally occurring. After being treated in the water treatment plant, the water is delivered around the City via distribution pipes. source: Colorado Springs Utilities 📉 Who Regulates Colorado Springs Drinking Water? The City of Colorado Springs drinking water is managed by Colorado Springs Utilities and regulated by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA). Like all public water systems, Colorado Springs Utilities must adhere to the EPA's protective water regulations, called National Primary Drinking Water Regulations. According to EPA guidelines, water must be treated to make it potable and safe to drink, and the water quality should remain consistent (with testing to prove this). Large public water systems are also monitored by the EPA for the presence of numerous contaminants that aren't currently regulated with official Standards, under the Unregulated Contaminant Monitoring Rule (UCMR). According to EPA guidelines, public water systems should monitor their water and conduct regular tests. This testing can then be shared publicly and used to produce annual Consumer Confidence Reports (see below). Colorado Springs measures its water quality by conducting a range of tests for pH, color, turbidity, and the concentration of metals, nutrients, and other substances. 🧪 Colorado Springs Annual Water Quality Report The latest Water Quality Report (or Consumer Confidence Report) for Colorado Springs is dated from January to December 2021. The Report shares useful information about the City's water supply, including where it comes from, how it's treated, and which contaminants it contains. According to the Report, the trace contaminants detected in testing are present in concentrations that don't exceed the Maximum Contaminant Levels - but, of course, the presence of these contaminants means that the water isn't completely pure or safe to drink. For example, 5 PPB of uranium was listed as detected in the Report, which is well within the EPA's MCL of 30 PPB, so it's not a violation - but you'd probably rather drink water that's completely free from this radioactive heavy metal. Some of the contaminants listed in the Report include: - Copper - Lead - HAA5 - TTHMs - Combined radium - Combined uranium - Barium - Fluoride - Nitrate - Selenium - Xylenes We recommend reading through the full report to familiarize yourself with the contaminants detected and how these concentrations compare to EPA MCLs and Action Levels. It's worth keeping in mind that EPA regulations may be amended or updated occasionally, so the information in this Report is only specific to the 2021 period. ☣️ Contaminants Found Above Guidelines in Tap Water in Colorado Springs So, we know that the EPA deems Colorado Springs water to be safe to drink. But which contaminants does the Environmental Working Group deem to be present in potentially dangerous concentrations? We've shared these contaminants below. Haloacetic acids (HAA5)† and Haloacetic acids (HAA9)† HAA5 and HAA9 are two types of haloacetic acids that are produced as byproducts of chemical disinfection. Consuming high levels of HAA5 and HAA9 may increase your risk of several cancers, including colon, bladder, liver, and rectal cancer. 38.7 PPB and 37.00 PPB (parts per billion) of HAA5 and HAA9 were detected in Colorado Springs drinking water - between 387 and 617x the EWG's Health Advisories of 0.1 PPB and 0.06 PPB. EPA has set an MCL of 60 PPB for HAA5, while HAA9 currently isn't regulated. Radium (-226 & -228) Radium -226 and radium -228 - also known as radium combined - may cause anemia, depression of the immune system, and cancer if they're consumed in large concentrations. The EWG has set a Health Guideline of 0.05 pCi/L (picoCurie per liter) for these contaminants, and 0.31 pCi/L was detected in Colorado Springs water - 6.2 x this recommendation. The EPA's MCL for radium in drinking tap water is 5 pCi/L. Total trihalomethanes (TTHMs)† Another byproduct produced when disinfectants react with naturally occurring organic matter is total trihalomethanes (TTHMs). Consuming large quantities of TTHMs may increase your risk of cancers including bladder and colon cancers. 43.3 PPB of TTHMs were detected in Colorado Springs drinking water - 289x the EWG's recommended Health Guideline of 0.15 PPB. The EPA has set a much higher MCL of 80 PPB for these contaminants. Other Disinfection Byproducts Several other disinfection byproducts, including bromodichloromethane, chloroform, dibromochloromethane, dichloroacetic acid, trichloroacetic acid, were also detected in Colorado Springs drinking water. Most of these contaminants don't currently have MCLs, but the EWG has recommended Health Guidelines of 0.06-o.4 PPB (depending on the contaminant in question). The disinfectant byproducts in Colorado Springs water are present in quantities 5.9 to 241x these Guidelines. Uranium Uranium is a radiological contaminant that occurs naturally in the earth and may cause kidney damage if consumed in excess. 1.24 pCi/L of uranium was detected in San Diego tap water - that's 2.9x the EWG Health Guideline of 0.43 pCi/L. The EPA has set a MCL for this contaminant of 20 pCi/L in water. Colorado Springs is no different from the majority of other public water utilities in that disinfection byproducts are its main water quality issue. When chlorine is used to treat drinking water, disinfection byproducts are usually an unavoidable outcome. They're produced when chlorine reacts with naturally occurring organic matter in the water, and the only way to prevent their formation is to avoid chemical disinfection entirely. What makes it worse is that the EPA only regulates a few types of this drinking water contaminant, despite the fact that numerous disinfection byproducts have been linked to health concerns including cancer. 🧫 Main Contaminants Found in Colorado Springs Tap Water Now we know the contaminants present in potentially dangerous levels in the Colorado Springs water supply, what about the contaminants present in safe levels (according to both the EPA and the EWG)? These contaminants include: - Antimony - A naturally occurring metal that is present in soils and rocks; drinking extremely contaminated water is unlikely but may cause short-term effects including nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting. - Barium - A non-toxic metal that's found in some sedimentary and igneous rocks; may cause nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, and cramping if consumed in excess; very large amounts may cause paralysis and death. - Chromium-6 (hexavalent chromium) - The most dangerous form of chromium; may cause liver and reproductive system damage if large amounts are ingested in drinking water. - Disinfection byproducts including chlorate and monobromoacetic acid - Produced when disinfectants like chlorine react with organic matter; may cause an increased cancer risk and liver damage if consumed in excess. - Fluoride - A mineral found naturally in Colorado Springs water (the City doesn't artificially fluoridate its water), not known to affect drinking water quality but may cause dental fluorosis or discoloration of the teeth. - Manganese - A mineral often present alongside calcium that's known to cause hard water effects like limescale staining, poor lather with soap, and appliance clogging; doesn't affect human health at low levels. - Molybdenum - A micronutrient for plants and animals; ingesting large amounts of this contaminant may cause fatigue, joint pain, headache, and loss of appetite. - Nitrate and nitrite - Two forms of nitrogen that are known to affect the blood's ability to carry oxygen, increase the risk of certain cancers, and have other health effects when consumed in large amounts in water. - Strontium - A heavy metal that may be mistaken as calcium in the body; ingesting large amounts may cause strontium to replace calcium in the bones, affecting their structure. - Total chromium - Refers to both chromium-6 (mentioned above) and chromium-3 (or trivalent chromium, mostly harmless) in water. - Vanadium - A naturally occurring metal that is found in low levels in surface water sources; this drinking water contaminant doesn't have negative health effects in small amounts. ⛲ Colorado Springs Drinking Water in Public Places The public places in Colorado Springs, like hotels, restaurants, and bars, use the same tap water supply as the homes and businesses in the City. That means, unless stated otherwise, it's safe to drink faucet water in these public places. If you ask at a restaurant, you should be served tap water for free. However, keep in mind that restaurants aren't legally required to provide free drinking water. In Colorado hotels, most bathroom sinks now have safe drinking water. Some older hotels might not, so check at reception if you're unsure. You should be able to get clean tap water from the hotel bar. You might choose to buy bottled water rather than drinking water in public places in Colorado. Some bottled water manufacturers treat drinking water with processes like reverse osmosis, making it cleaner and healthier than public drinking water. However, we recommend using a water filter to treat your water at home (when you can) to reduce the environmental effects of single-use plastic consumption. Related Content: - Ranking the US States with the Best Tap Water: Our Comprehensive List - Everything You Need to Know About Water Quality and Testing in 💬 Frequently Asked Questions Where does the drinking water in Colorado Springs come from? The drinking water in Colorado Springs primarily comes from the Rocky Mountains. Most of this water is snow melt, meaning that it usually hasn't been used and is less likely to be polluted than water in lower-level sources. The majority of Colorado Springs water is surface water (meaning that it's sourced from aboveground water supplies). How clean Is tap water in Colorado Spring? Colorado Springs tap water is considered clean. It's not entirely contaminant-free, but only trace levels of around 20 contaminants were detected in the City's water supply. If you live in Colorado Springs and you want to drink purified water, you'll need to install a water filtration system in your home. Can you drink faucet water in Colorado Springs? Yes, you can drink faucet water in Colorado Springs. Just make sure that the faucet is designed to deliver drinking water (for example, some bathroom faucets contain heavy metals because they're only intended to deliver water for hand washing). Also make sure that your home's plumbing system or the gooseneck connecting your home to the City's water supply doesn't contain lead, which is highly unsafe to drink. Does Colorado Springs water contain fluoride? Yes, Colorado Springs water contains trace levels of natural fluoride - but the City doesn't fluoridate its water. Many states add artificial fluoride to their drinking water supplies for the mineral's dental health benefits, but Colorado Springs does not. Your water's natural fluoride levels may vary depending on its source. How is Colorado Springs tap water disinfected? The tap water in Colorado Springs is disinfected with chlorine. Chlorine is a common disinfectant for water utilities because it's affordable and easy to use for large-scale treatment. However, the problem with chlorine is that it can contaminate water with disinfection byproducts, which have several known health effects but (for the most part) aren't currently regulated by the EPA. Read the full article

[aspenpluma]

10 Mistakes To Avoid When Installing A Plumbing System

Are you searching for "emergency plumber near me" on the internet to help with your plumbing issues like fixing your hot water system? Installing a new plumbing system can be time-consuming and complicated. It’s important to take your time and not rush the process, otherwise, you may inadvertently make mistakes that have expensive consequences.

In this day and age, almost everyone knows at least something about plumbing services, maintenance and DIY’er tasks around the house. However, when it comes to the installation of an entire home plumbing system it takes much more skill and professionalism. There are many things that can go wrong if you try breezing through it yourself without taking the necessary steps or hiring a professional local plumber.

In this article, we will take you through 10 common plumbing mistakes that people make when installing a plumbing system which should help you avoid making costly blunders.

1. Skipping the knowledge of building codes 

Failing to stay up-to-date with local building codes is one of the most common errors people make when installing their own plumbing system. Many states require professional licenses to install a residential or commercial plumbing solution so review the rules and regulations in your area prior to taking on any project.

2. Ignoring proper drainage design and drain cleaners

An improper drainage design can cause backup problems, blocked drains, overflowing toilets and fixtures, and low water pressure in other areas throughout your building, resulting in extensive repairs down the road. Make sure to allow for proper slope for good drainage whenever adding new pipes and fittings or extension piping for an existing structure or remodelling job.

3. Not double-checking connections

When dealing with gas lines, one small mistake can have catastrophic consequences which is why double-checking connections is so important. Be sure to check all joints prior to testing any gas line and test each individual portion of the pipe separately instead of testing them all at once as this will highlight any potential weak connections that may need adjustment before you expose yourself and others to the risk of harm due to poor piping practices.

4. Choosing the wrong size pipe

Choosing a pipe size too small won’t provide enough flow for consistent functionality and choosing a pipe size too large wastes spare parts material as well as money since larger pipes require more materials costs plus labour charges depending on who’s doing the plumbing job installation. Always take into account your desired flow rates when sizing these copper pipes accordingly ahead of time instead of waiting until after installation has been completed

5. Neglecting water hammer arrester installation

If not installed properly, sudden pressure surges caused by valve shutoff or high-velocity water supply flow can cause intense vibrations (water hammer) throughout your entire piping network – leading to leaks unless you install an arrester along with pressure-reducing valves wherever necessary across the entire system prior to running any tests

6. Forgetting clean-outs and shutoffs

Many local codes may also require cleanouts buried below ground level at certain intervals across all branch lines within your building’s plumbing system so be aware of these requirements prior to starting work on any project if applicable in your given situation Plumbing shut-offs or turning off the water valves should also be clearly labelled (ease in maintenance) either above sink/shower units or visible nearby wall surfaces wherever water flows within these respective locations throughout the house/building

7. Overlooking venting requirements 

Venting must be done properly as outlined under local city code specifications otherwise unpleasant odour symptoms may occur from improper fresh air circulation within any sewage line system. 

This generally occurs whenever the vertical distance between the sewer line and the outdoor vent exceeds six feet outward for appropriate ventilation unless special circumstances exist such as running drain pipes beneath floors slab foundation systems then additional consideration must be made

8. Failing to use pipe joint compounds on threaded connections

When assembling threaded fittings together always use approved pipe joint compound upon threads (Teflon tape) otherwise gas/plastic tubes might come apart later due to corrosion buildup over extended periods of exposure.

This holds especially true when dealing with plastic-based PVC/ABS fittings where pieces sometimes do not fit snugly together. Few things are more frustrating than experiencing a leak eventually because insufficient lube compounds used during the initial work procedure

9. Ignoring water pressure ratings 

Each pipe has its own pressure rating which must be taken into account when designing a plumbing system. Don’t assume that all pipes or pipe wrenches will hold the same amount of pressure as this is not always the case and could lead to serious plumbing problems down the line if not properly accounted for ahead of time

10. Not testing for leaks

Last but not least, it is always wise to test the entire system prior to finalizing work. Make sure to check each joint connection separately using a garden hose water pressure gauge or even better if possible use professional-grade equipment such as a hydrostatic testing device This way can make sure there are no hidden leaks present before finalizing the project. Hiring a professional and fully licensed plumber near you is highly recommended if you want a safe and secured plumbing system. If you’re having a hard time looking for the nearest plumber in your area, you can try searching for “plumber near me” on the internet to help you out.

[diplastplastic]

PVC Pipes & Fittings

Polyvinyl chloride is known as PVC. This polymer of chlorinated hydrocarbons exists. It is stiff and brittle in its unaltered condition. However, it becomes more durable and bendable with chemicals like plasticisers.

Production of PVC conduit pipes by DIPLAST started in 1972. PVC pressure pipes and fittings, plumbing pipes and fittings, column pipes, SWR pipes and fittings, conduit pipes and fittings, water storage tanks, PPR pipes and fittings, CPVC pipes and fittings, dustbins, trolleys, portable toilets, benches, compost bins, and planters are just a few of the products the company now manufactures. Since that time, it has significantly expanded.      

USED FOR:

PVC pipes are widely used in the water supply industry. PVC pipes make up the majority of the main water pipelines. PVC pipes are also used in large-scale irrigation systems and sanitary sewage networks.

PVC pipes are utilised in plumbing, drainage, agricultural irrigation, power & telecommunications networks, and the ductwork of heating and cooling systems in both home and commercial settings.

Benefits of PVC pipes:

In many industries, PVC pipes are the chosen medium for moving power and water. The primary reasons for their widespread use are their strong resistance to heat and corrosion.

Compared to concrete and metal, PVC and flowing liquids have less friction because of their smooth surface. As a result, it is a preferred material for pipes that transport water.

It is portable and simple to move over long distances to lay pipelines. Because less fuel is required to transport them, they are environmentally friendly.

Since a relatively straightforward process is used for its mass production, it is cost-effective.

It is a versatile material with various uses because it is simple to mould into different shapes.

It is resilient to high levels of stress and robust and long-lasting. This qualifies it as a promising material for subterranean pipes and pipelines carrying pressured fluids.

Diplast Plastic Ltd., one of the top ten firms in India because of its quality, technology, turnover, manufacturing capacity, and wide range of high-quality goods, offers the best pvc fittings in Mohali. Diplast Plastics Ltd. brings several plastic breakthroughs to India.

Products available with us are:

Nahni Trap - for draining bathroom/washbasin waste from the mainline.

P. trap - to ensure watertight construction and adequate drainage.

Vent cowl - Use as a cap on the vertical line's top. Assist in the discharge of toxic gases as well.

End cap- These are used to seal the pipeline's end.

Reducer sockets - These are utilised in order to transform the service line into a tiny, extra-tiny line.

Tee - These are used for short turns of 45°.

Elbow 90 degrees - These are employed for 90° short bends. These are not recommended for use with big pipes that have significant pressure.

Socket - These are used for the joining of two uPVC Pipes.

[darnloveablecharacters]

Universal, Part Six: Peace

Series Summary: Simply a multi-part, self indulgent reader insert with John Wick universe kinda plumbed in. Fair warning…. SLOWWW BURN. Ignore canon and timing and crap, that’s not important….  Gifs and recognizable characters are not mine, but the story and all of the mistakes are!

The Universal - Masterlist

Chapter Notes: So.... I know I posted the previous chapter like just a few hours ago, but as I kept adding on to this I got more and more excited. If you’re cool with little context, this could be the one-shot I had kinda imagined. (not really, this was actually no where near where I thought this fic was going but I’m going to say it’s my personal favorite lol)

Without further ado: Here it is! The conclusion to the Universal. Thank you all for your amazing support and love <3 

Warnings for this chapter: Angst, NSFW (not quite smut but there is little left to the imagination.)

Ben wasn’t supposed to ever see Y/N again. He didn’t have the right. Nevertheless, she was there, watching him warily when he had entered the Mos Eisley markets. His moment of joy at seeing her immediately crashed into a sea of despair as his thoughts consumed him and he turned away from her. She deserves more than I can ever give her. He thought numbly as he moved to leave the market. He thought he could hear her calling to him, but he knew it was simply a trick of the dwindling hope in his heart.

He didn’t stop until he felt a strong grip pull him toward a shadowy alley, just outside of the space port. “What are you doing, Kenobi?” She said, clearly flustered.

He didn’t answer her, he just watched and waited. He waited for her to leave, as she should. They all left him.

She narrowed her eyes at him but kept a firm grip on his arm. “Obi Wan? Are you with me?”

I should have been, I should never have left you. Perhaps all of this could have been avoided He thought bitterly. His inner monologue was all that had kept him company since he arrived on Tatooine. He wasn’t even sure he could speak anymore.

She slapped him.

“Stop that.” She scolded, glaring at him.

“What was that for?” He croaked in surprise, raising his hand to rub his jaw.

“There’s that lovely voice.” She said with a smirk before falling serious again. “Your mind is screaming. Everything that you’re beating yourself up over, it’s not worth torturing yourself like this.”

He scoffed at her and she rolled her eyes. “You don’t know, so how could you know what I deserve.” Ben countered.

She raised her eyebrow and tapped a finger against her temple.

Oh.

Their connection. It was still there, a feathery brush against his mind that had convinced him to keep going in his moments of deepest agony. It had faded somewhat when they parted, but it was still strong. He gazed at her with glassy eyes as he realized that he had nearly forgotten.

She sighed and grabbed his arm again, pulling him toward a hangar. “We’re leaving.”

“I can’t leave, Y/L/N.” He protested weakly.

“Yes, you can, and you will.” She said forcefully.

He heaved a heavy sigh but allowed her to pull him into the hanger toward a ship he didn’t recognize. “You have a new ship?” He said admiringly.

Y/N’s eyebrows shot up at that. “You really thought that after all this time I wouldn’t? I couldn’t exactly fly my old one anymore.” Ben chuckled despite himself. “Oh, I’m even graced with a polite laugh. How kind of you Kenobi.” She said with a mocking bow. “Now, are you going to come in on your own free will or will I have to continue dragging you?” She said gesturing toward the open door.

Ben shook his head, amused. “I’m coming, but I really will have to return.”

She dismissed him with a wave. “Fine, fine. I suppose that means we will have to get moving so you have more time to enjoy yourself!”

He rolled his eyes, but followed her into the ship and buckled in. She took off quickly and entered the coordinates without another word.

“Where are we going?” He asked when she turned the screen away from him.

She finished tapping on the panel and the ship moved into hyperspace before she finally turned to him, grinning. “The only place where two people with unfortunate bounties on their heads can relax.”

~

They arrived at The Universal not long after and missed the glum exchange of gold coins under the table as Y/N requested a single room. Winston had naturally won the bet, much to Charon and John’s chagrin. They were delighted, of course. Not only had a regular patron at The Universal found happiness, but two natural enemies overcame their differences and found peace together.

~

The door to their room closed and Ben took a deep breath as he watched Y/N walk around flicking on lamps. He closed his eyes contentedly, feeling her energy. The longer he was by her side, the more open the connection became and the distance brought from time apart was already nearly non-existent. 

He smiled as he felt her approach. She was calm, but there was an undercurrent of nervous energy laced with it.

He opened his eyes as she gently pushed his robe off his shoulders, letting it fall to the ground. “What would you like to do now?” She asked breathily, sliding her hands down his shoulders and resting them on his chest.

Ben wrapped his arms around her waist but made no other move as he suddenly warred with himself. He wanted this, he wanted her but had spent his entire life trying to follow the code to the best of his ability. He knew that if he allowed himself this moment, there would be no coming back from it. He looked deeply into Y/N eyes and felt her patience and compassion. He knew that if he stepped away, she would understand.

It struck him then. The Order had been destroyed, all that was left was the will of the Force. As if to confirm his train of thought, their connection suddenly surged brightly.

“Y/N.” Ben groaned finally pulling her into a passionate kiss. She let out a surprised hum against him, but she quickly was consumed by her own desire and reciprocated gladly. She grabbed fistfuls of his tunic and began to pull him toward the bed as Ben deepened the kiss. Trails of clothing were quickly left behind as they moved and Ben pushed her unceremoniously onto the bed. Y/N gasped lustfully when he used the Force to hold her in place as he allowed his most carnal instincts take over. His eyes raked over her naked body with appreciation and he crawled over her like a hungry predator over his prey. “Beautiful.” He said huskily as he traced his fingers on her soft skin, leaving a trail of goosebumps from the caress. She was breathless as she watched him through lidded eyes, trembling with anticipation. He smirked and leaned forward, placing a kiss to her lips that was so tender she whimpered with need. “Now, what would you like me to do?” He whispered, trailing light kisses down her jaw.

~

The Jedi was gone.

All that remained was the man and woman moaning in pleasure as they finally let go and gave themselves fully to each other.

~

The sound of her crying out his name danced in his mind as he lay with her in his arms, rubbing her back softly.

“Do you really have to return to Tatooine?” Y/N murmured, tracing her fingers lightly across his chest.

Ben let out a sad sigh and pressed a kiss to the top of her head before answering. “Not immediately, but yes. I made a promise.”

“Foolish Jedi.” She said with a scoff.

Ben smirked. “Who is the bigger fool?”

Y/N smiled and shifted to place a gentle kiss to his cheek. “That’s my line.” She said with a small giggle before turning serious again. “I’ll come with you.”

Ben’s arms tightened around her as yet, another war of emotion began inside him. He felt pure joy at her offer, but guilt at what it could cost her. He would not let her lose her freedom to him, not again. “No.” He finally said sitting up and pulling her with him. She watched him with a carefully blank expression, but he could feel her confusion and pain at the rejection. He gripped her hands tightly. “My life is one of exile Y/N.” He explained quickly, pleading for her to understand. “I could never ask that of you. Your own freedom is more important than that.”

Ben felt his heart constrict as she pulled out of his grip, but she framed his face with her hands to ensure he would keep eye contact. “What greater freedom could there be than to be able to spend the rest of my life with the person I love?” She asked him with conviction.

Ben sucked in a breath as he slowly registered what she had just said. “The… rest of your life?” He asked in wonder.

Y/N tilted her head to the side with a smirk. “That’s what you’re choosing to focus on right now?”

“Yes.” He said breathlessly.

She shook her head, amused, before looking him directly. “I pledge myself to you, Obi Wan Kenobi. I love you and am yours if you will have me.”

Ben’s breath hitched as felt her feelings confirm her words.

Maker. He thought as tears of joy filled his eyes. He cupped her cheek, rubbing his thumb gently on her skin. It was a few moments before he could finally speak with a steady voice. “I pledge myself to you Y/N Y/L/N. I love…”

He was interrupted when Y/N’s crashed against his, wrapping her arms around his neck. He closed his eyes, smiling, as he happily returned the kiss. They broke apart breathlessly and Y/N flashed him a sheepish grin. “I’m actually really sorry for interrupting that. I just… couldn’t stop myself.”

Ben pushed her back down onto the bed and rolled on top of her, placing a chaste kiss to her lips. “I do not think I will ever complain about being interrupted by you in a such a way; however, can you contain yourself for a moment so I can finish? I have wanted to tell you this for a long time.”

“How long?” Y/N questioned gazing at him through lidded eyes.

Ben glared at her and she muttered an embarrassed apology. He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear gently and allowed everything he felt for her to surround them. “I love you, Y/N. I am, and always will be, yours.” He said softly.

She smiled up at him with tears shining in her eyes and raised her hand to trace her fingers through his beard. A sudden thought crossed her mind and she furrowed her eyebrows. “Do I have to call you Ben?” She asked uncertainly.

His eyes widened, and he collapsed on top of her shaking with laughter. She wrapped her arms around him and pecked his cheek, succumbing to her own fit of giggles.

~

They made love again, this time with less desperation. It was slow, passionate, and full of every emotion they had not been allowed to share until now. As he cried out her name with his release, he knew that they were truly one. They were connected in a way that Obi Wan hadn’t thought would be possible in his life as a Jedi.

He held her tightly as she fell asleep against him, finally at peace. He placed a gentle kiss to her head and, for the first time in longer than he could remember, he genuinely believed he could be happy.

The End

Authors Notes: Okay take it or leave it, you can assume they follow the path of canon and Vader kills Obi Wan later and Y/N dies before or after or…. whatever…. OR! You can choose to believe Obi Wan and Y/N lived a happily ever after, had like hundreds of children and died at a ridiculously old age (like older than Yoda, old). I’m personally going with the latter. 😊 Eff canon and all the heartbreak. (I actually really love Star Wars canon but damn…. So much sad)

Thank you for reading! Much love <3 <3

Oh yeah, almost forgot…. THE VOICE. Now that the story is finished, I can tell you that the voice I heard for the reader while writing this is Trilla from Jedi: Fallen Order… voiced by the gorgeous Elizabeth Grullon… yup. If you don’t know her, GOOGLE HER or play the dang game. SO worth it! Her and her voice are so sexy and if I had a choice for someone to play me in the overly boring movie that is my life, it would be her. Maybe with Morgan Freeman as a narrator but I digress… 😊 (I literally look absolutely nothing like that beautiful human being but that’s why we’re here… to dream)

[kingofdirtandnothing]

@polyfacetious big ass Christmas Drabble Extravagaza: Day Twenty One

No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality; even larks and katydids are supposed, by some, to dream. Hill House, not sane, stood by itself against its hills, holding darkness within; it had stood so for eighty years and might stand for eighty more. Within, walls continued upright, bricks met neatly, floors were firm, and doors were sensibly shut; silence lay steadily against the wood and stone of Hill House, and whatever walked there, walked alone.

Steven looked at the blinking cursor at the end of the sentence on his screen, an accusing slow blink of black against the white background, and chews on the edge of his lip. He’s already worked his chapped lips past the point of being salvaged with chapstick. The next tug of his teeth against skin comes away with a strip of dead skin and the rusty taste of blood from the split against his tongue.

The line was good, he could feel the weight of it behind his teeth, and he could hear the ebb and flow of it in his own internal voice. It was melodic, it moved in all the right ways. So why was it that Steven couldn’t leave the line alone and move on? He’d been staring at it for seconds going on hours now, and it still wasn’t enough.

It was because something wasn’t sitting right, and Steven didn’t know how to suss it out. How did you root out the needle in the haystack when every time you ran your fingers through it, it came out just the same?

“You’re thinking too hard.” Luke’s voice, light and playful despite the depths it had plumbed to in the time between their last meeting years before and now, walking the same halls and living under the same roof again. Luke’s voice had been a puddle at Aunt Janet’s pitchy and splashy, full of ups and downs. It was deeper now, a little choppy at the tops of his words but you could feel the still waters running deep behind the consonants. 

That wasn’t the only thing that changed. 

Gone was the little brother with the coke bottle glasses and the lisp, with his big boy hat and his wide eyed hero worship of his older brother. Fine blonde baby hair had given way to something deeper, that cradled his skull and made his skin look brighter. It dusted across his forearms, down into the vee of his shirt when he wore the ones he slept in, worn out at the neckline into a soft scoop. 

There was some alien creature in front of him, wearing the subtleties of his little brother around the edges but little else to tie the ‘then-Luke’ to the ‘now-Luke’. His brother had become a song that you could hum the melody to, but you couldn’t remember the words to the song, no matter how hard you tried. 

(Elfin had been the first word that he thought of, when he was trying to slot some definition in his mind next to this new person in his life, overflowing from the old box in the back of his head that Steven kept him in. But nothing about Luke was elfin. Neither was he rangey, or coltish. There was too much weight to him, too much heft. Steven was still struggling to find the right word for him.)

“Sorry.” Steven scrubs a hand over his mouth and marvels at how different the voice that leaves his mouth is compared to the one he hears in his head. There are moments when it’s vertiginous, this separation between the inner and the outer. Sometimes, Steven isn’t sure which one is the right one. The real one. 

The real Steven Crain. Was it the mild mannered, bespectacled author who signed books in a shop down the street from his house to auction off for charity? Or was it the man who stood beneath the shower’s spray and found his thoughts swirling down the drain just like the water from the faucet? Steven wasn’t even sure that he wanted to know the answer to that question. 

“I’m having a hard time with this one.” Steven has made his name, and his living off of historical novels. Always with a sprinkle of the supernatural, a dash of despair. A winning recipe he’s not keen to change, even if there’s been half an idea brewing in the back of his head for months now that he doesn’t know what to do with. 

A different kind of story, when you got down to the marrow of it. Sure, all of his stories carried the same sort of melancholy to them, the same sense of longing. But this was less a vein running through the center of a stone and more a river cutting through the rock to carve its own path. Steven hasn’t even mentioned it to his publisher. He doesn’t know if he will. 

“What’s giving you trouble?” Luke’s hip juts out, a flash of skin between tank top and lounge pants, there and gone. He’s palming a bottle of juice, twisting and tightening the lid in the webbing between thumb and index finger. It’s oddly mesmerizing. 

“It feels…” Steven lets the words fall off the cliff of his tongue with nothing to follow. Because this was the crux of it, wasn’t it? He didn’t know what the problem was. The words on the screen lined up nicely, there was a music to them. They should be practically perfect, good enough that Steven wouldn’t mind Nell over his shoulder, or his editor taking a look at it. 

But something about them wasn’t sitting right with him. Steven pulls his gaze from Luke’s hands and turns it back towards the glare of the white screen, the cursor pulsing at the end of the last sentence like a lethargic heartbeat. 

“Disingenuous? No. Dispassionate? No.” It’s somewhere in this ballpark, a word that starts with ‘d’ that Steven just can’t put his finger on. “Distant.” It’s not a perfect fit by a long shot and Steven shows his displeasure of it with a crinkle of his nose. But it was going to have to do, or this conversation would be stalled for God knows how long. 

“Distant?” Luke echoes, the back end of it tugged up into a question. It’s a leading question, meant to give Steven the room to work it out on the free air, instead of the caged confines of his own head. Steven is more grateful than he can put to words right now. 

“Usually, when I write, I feel myself in the main character.” Even with his female leads, Steven could find enough of himself in them to do a passably good imitation. He’d never know exactly how a woman’s mind worked, Leigh was sure to tell him that, but Steven did okay. But not with this piece. 

“With this one, it feels like I’m standing over someone’s shoulder. Like I’m repeating their story instead of telling my own.” And that shouldn’t be a problem. Hundreds of stories were told that way, with limited perspective and distance to help control the narrative. Just not Steven’s stories. His stories were about being in the meat of it. Feeling what the character felt. No matter how painful. 

“Do you think it’s the wrong main character?” It’s a perspective that Steven would have never thought of for himself. Of course, Luke was always good at things like that. He and Nell saw the world differently than Steven did. And it helped him immensely when they gave that insight into their world view. 

“I don’t know.” Steven hums, drumming his fingers against the laptops casing in a rapid staccato. “Really, the story is supposed to be about the man who buys the house. He’s surrounded by this...maw. This gaping, ravenous darkness and he has no idea. It keeps growing around him, creeping in and he doesn’t even see it. Like the frog in the pot of water. He doesn’t know he’s boiling until it’s too late.”

Steven’s gaze slips to the window, unfocused enough that Luke is a series of soft shapes against the backdrop of golden sunlight. “It’s a ghost story, right?” The Luke shaped outline lifts the bottle of juice and finally takes a drink. Steven is grateful for the distance so he doesn’t watch the way that his throat works. “Why not write it from one of the ghosts perspective?”

That was...a very interesting thought. “I do have a couple of spirits who aren’t inherently evil and haven’t been driven mad by the house.” The ‘yet’ feels heavy on his tongue, but Steven doesn’t want to commit to anything, not when they’re rebuilding on top of the very foundation of the story right now. 

“Yeah? Like who?” Luke moves away from his perch against the counter and comes back into focus in Steven’s peripheral before he slinks down into the kitchen chair across from the laptop, knees wide and shoulders rolled down loosely. So much new muscle and length that he didn’t know what to do with yet, or how to move. 

“There’s one…” It comes out guarded to his own ears. Steven tends to keep his stories to himself until he can filter the biggest parts of himself out through the narrative. “An heir who dies to keep the rest of his family safe.”

An older brother who dies to protect his siblings, both the beloved and the ungrateful alike. But Steven can’t say that out loud, he can’t admit how much of his writing is just wish fulfillment turned into something just different enough to pass muster. 

“There you go.” If Luke catches on, he doesn’t say anything about it. And he doesn’t wear any of it openly across a face that has never kept a secret in all its life. Steven was grateful for that. For as much as Shirl and Theo had grown and changed into people unrecognizable from the siblings he grew up with, there was still enough Nellie and Luke left in this young adults who moved in with him just last year for Steven to find comfort in.

He’d never mistake this kitchen for Aunt Janet’s, but at least he could look at his brother and still see someone who cared for him looking back. 

Luke says it like it’s so simple. There you go. As if shifting the entire narrative was just that simple. Make a choice, and commit to it. It couldn’t really be that simple, could it? Steven scrubs a hand against his stubbled cheek and finally looks at something other than his brother or his words. He looks at his coffee cup, and buys himself precious seconds with an overly sweet mouthful of still too hot coffee. 

Just like that. A new perspective. The same story, just told through a different lens. 

You could turn a villain into a hero with a new perspective. And you could excuse things that might be inexcusable otherwise. 

“There I go.” Steven parrots it back to him with a slow, wonder drenched shake of his head. “I don’t know how I finished any books without you here.” He’s rewarded with a big, bright grin that lights up Luke’s entire face, somehow reminding him of the kid he knew while simultaneously making him look every bit the adult he was now. 

“Y-you’re welcome.” That stutter sets off something warm and pleased in Steven’s chest. Luke didn’t stutter nearly as much as he did when a kid, but it was just as often a good thing these days as it was something stressing him out. 

Steven takes another sip of his coffee, this time so that he can hide his smile behind it. Given the eye roll he gets from Luke, Steven doesn’t think it’s very successful. But when he says “How many porch light metaphors are too many?” and gets a laugh in return, it all feels successful enough. 

[zafaria]

Omnivore

It became very apparent why the notches and spokes on gears were called “teeth”.

“Teeth.”

The word didn’t feel right between hers.

“Teeth ,” she said as she looked up the axle of the machine.

Overhead the gears whirred. They were the size of whole islands. They reminded her in part of Brabanzio Villa, with the notches like the little arches in the marble portico surrounding the courtyard. Except there wasn’t anything that jutted out hungrily, all of the columns were lined safely underneath the connected annulets, like their large flat heads were connected by a surrounding comfort. They were aligned. They were the flat, humble teeth of an unthreatening herbivore ground down to the gums, leveled.

Then to either side of the walkway that opened up from the dock and formed the decking around the core, there were gears connected like waterwheels that had sharp spokes, like the edges of chainsaws. Malicious things, best kept away from. Undulling shark teeth.

And all the while looking at the structure she clenched hers, then looked in front of her and saw a most fascinating sight, one she had not seen for months: Phule. He beckoned her over from beyond some destroyed marines, with his long mask. Kane gave him a mouth, and on the lighthearted side, Phule smiled. On the stern side of his face, he scowled with his mouth bitterly propped open. But there were no teeth, and it was hollow and dark underneath the mask, and she could only ever imagine what drove him, what gave him spark to continue forward in his elusive, whimsical way.

She approached, treading carefully past the guards, wary of Phule and his ruses, that the hands of one of the constructs might reach from below and trip her up.

Phule looked at her straight as she approached, but when she came within distance of conversation, he turned his bitter side to her.

“It took you long enough to get here!” His mask was an exaggerated vaudeville one, polished black to look like an onyx or marble, or something else heavy. It was theatrical, but the droop to his mustache curling downwards and the fine feathers on his brow lifted up in warning scared her. And then he turned the other way, to show his amicable side, but also pointedly looking towards one of her guests.

“What are you doing here?” The “you” was drawn out, incredulous. It was to the old man, and the word was so sharp, so cruel, she worried it had drawn his blood, would make him collapse in the wind of it, as it began to echo into his ears. But Phule again proved difficult to predict as he reached his hand out toward the old man, and the old man took his clammy little clockwork hand in kind, between his own warm, large and gnarled fingers drawn out from wringing and tinkering. She stepped back a little and saw Gazpaccio’s warm, closed-mouth smile and his breathlessness, and she saw Phule's mustache twitch and his chin move as he seemed to mouth a word.

“Grandfather.”

Gazpaccio called him a tormented soul, said he made an error when he built Kane to be heartless. He held Phule’s tiny, almost dainty hand. Honored to meet a machine made from machine, and perhaps a little sad that the poor creature was, inevitably, only in existence because of his mistake making Kane so many, many years ago.

She held the sight a little longer. She wondered if Kane did have a heart from the beginning whether he would’ve still created, and if he did, would he have still made Phule as a joke, a tormented soul, or would he have been a little kinder.

“Fixing him will be difficult,” Phule said to the old man, then turned to the pirate. “You don’t know what the machine is for, do you?”

She shook her head. And then Phule flipped his, snapping his neck to the side. She thought he might be looking out over the decks for a second, but his wincing, malformed face began to speak.

“You don’t even know where you stand! You come in here to be some hero and yet you have not any idea how to begin!”

“Well. Yes. That’s been my entire journey up to this point, hasn’t it? I didn’t have an inkling of a clue of who you were when I first met you. How could we have predicted this, then?”

“Your ignorance could fill the Spiral!”

She frowned at this. She’d done wrong, spoken wrong. She didn’t like to think of the way things were in the places she had left behind, but she wondered, hungry and pained, what happened to the smoking buildings and ships in Westminster, or the vacated bodies of the wharf rats at Blood Shoals that no one tended to after they relinquished their ghosts.

Phule turned gently, back to his kind side. He explained slowly, patiently what the gears were, why there had been so many guards (but not why he had decided to clear the way for them). It was a Machine, a big Machine, to create a new First World from dust. To get rid of the imperfect things, like her.

“He’s your father. Why do you care?” she asked.

“As you can imagine, I have a rather unique perspective on imperfection.”

                                                                    *

Inside was full of brass and whining, and glass making the kinds of windows that bubble outwards and give the sky the appearance of storm-wracked darkness from window tint. But she knew it was just appearances, there was no tint to the windows, and they were clear glass. The sky was, in all truth, really that grey, that dusty. She’d just seen it.

And then in front of them was an elevator, but it looked an awful lot like a giant birdcage made of brass. She looked around the whole room. There were metal bars, plates, screws, up all the walls like seams. Outside, she saw a flash of green lightning. It turned in her mind, all the explicit, drenching danger of what she was about to do, but she also wondered about all the mundane dangers, the overloading of the small lift with her whole crew, the conductivity of all the metal, whether it was too exhilarating or taxing to get up to the top.

She turned to check on the old man, to make sure he hadn’t collapsed. She worried about him, that a breeze in the wrong direction might make him stumble, or that a sudden burst of lighting would send him into cardiac shock. He looked ahead, but noticed her gaze almost instantly. He turned to her and smiled with warmth, the red of his splotchy, wrinkled face a rare hue amidst the ferocious and vehement green and the unpalatable and loud orange-yellow.

She opened her mouth as if to speak a little.

“We shall be fine. Perhaps a few of us at once on the lift, yes?”

She closed her mouth.

Then, she stopped worrying about the mundane things and the minute things. There was only room, energy, emotion left for worrying about the big things, big like the Machine they were traipsing in. Gazpaccio reached his hand out to her and she grabbed it.

“We can go first.”

They walked together and held hands up to that brass birdcage and stood uneasy on the platform. She looked to him again, and he looked back with a smile, his crooked browned teeth showing in the flush of red.

The elevator ascended with more whining, and the rest of the crew stood, breathless and faced skyward as the old man and the pirate were lifted out of sight, surrounded by the miring sea of green glass and slowly moving bronze.

                                                              *

Above them, there was a raised center, like a stage. The Armada enjoyed their drama, after all. The entire spectacle was flanked by dragoons with heavy chests, lithe battle angels and their crowned helmets, and marines that each had sharp, polished blade axes. Kane stood in the center, his rapier extended as if he had struck already and was now plumbing the depths of the victim further.

The pirate and the old man were still holding each other’s hands. Gazpaccio unfurled his large fingers to step forwards, towards Kane and the blade. The old man began to fish something from a bag hanging on his side, sad and worn.

The pirate’s face furrowed.

Gazpaccio spoke, lifting out a small red object in a little wood-frame box. He held it up to Kane, leveling it out over the chest of the automaton. And in one swift motion, Kane grabbed his flintlock off his belt, and in the arc it took for him to raise his arm and line it up with the box, he flicked the lock back and it slammed into a little piece of flint and sparked.

The heart clamored out of the old man’s hands and fell to the floor, shattered.

She began to step forward, her mouth opened again as she moved towards the old man and held her arms out sheepishly, but somewhere above the man’s head, in the fuzziest reaches of her vision, a little fire shone and flashed out, and Gazpaccio crumbled on the floor before her, only a reach away.

She shouted, something feeble, something useless, and Kane just looked at her, interested and unfazed.

“Forget the map. Your race is over, and I’ve won.” His voice was smooth, but also crisp. It was inhuman, but interrupted by little jars and static and crackles.

She cried and tiptoed around the body of the old man, and as soon as her foot cleared his head, she ran and lept up towards the automaton’s foot, pulling at the empty, leathery tip of his boot. Kane flicked her off and sent her into the floorboards like it was a joke, taunting trapped, sacred, starving animals in a pit.

“I’ve made a new map. Took Marco Pollo twenty years; I made mine in twenty days.”

He said something else then walked away as she sat there on the ground staring at her knees, slumped next to the old man. Her parents hadn’t even been gone for fifteen years. She chased tattered, reeking and bleeding pieces of the map across the entire universe for only twenty days, and just to find that they were useless. Entirely useless. Her backbreak pulling at the lines and the sharp pains in her elbow from holding the wheel and gently guiding it, suspending her arms for hours. All of it useless.

The machines began to swarm around her and the old man. Her crew charged in and began shooting, disassembling, flinging things, knives, and yelling at each other. She stayed on the ground and felt that whole universe she had travelled and helped mend falling apart as gears would begin to grind into bedrock.

                                                             *

Her crew dragged her up by the elbows from her daze, interrupting her view of the ceiling and the wooden floorboards holding up the top of the machine.

“Come on! It isn’t over yet,” Bonnie said, pulling her by the arms, nearly tripping and floundering on a spiral set of unrailed marble stairs. Each little cliff in the stars reached up, like the serrated edges of some carnivore’s teeth. She stumbled over her footing again and again until the flight of stairs ended and they reached the top of the layer where Kane was standing minutes before. He had backed himself towards an edge now, near another bucket-lift.

It beeped. Well, something did. A little purple orb emerged from behind two bronzed, curved sheets.  It was polished to a shine, like a singular, faulty eye found on a spider or a bug or a squid. There were no separations, it was one unending sphere of a sickly, poison pink.

“No. Not yet. Prepare my escape, and destroy this chamber,” Kane said, looking at the pink sphere.

“No.”

There was silence. The Machine refused to obey the perfect creator, and this had left everyone and everything in the room a little stumped. Then Kane began yelling, turning almost infantile.

“I gave you an order and you will obey!”

The pirate looked bewildered and still tear-streaked, staring at the plaster man, watching his grip on the railing around the lift tighten and his legs straighten out. He was preoccupied waiting for the Machine; he didn’t notice she was staring.

Between her and Kane, the floorboards opened up and a series of automatons, the same kinds of battle-angels and dragoons from before, were lifted up into the light. Kane turned and went into the bucket-lift, leaving the pirate to resolve his insubordinate, imperfect Machine.

The pirate and her crew turned to one of their favorite solutions for pretentious and condescending things: they beat the core pillars surrounding the chamber until they were smashed and compromised and the Machine was left a stuttering and defunct mess.

And then they all grasped on to each other, surrounding the pirate in a ring of arms as they clung to the overburdened lift to Kane.

                                                             * 

At that top floor, there was a checkerboard tiling of black and white polished marble. She stepped up towards the squares, but not on them, then looked at Kane.

He stared back. Around him, he was flanked by even rows of other automatons, some they had seen and one they did not recognize.

“Allow me to introduce my greatest of creations, the Queen,” Kane said with a bow. The Queen let her hand-held mask down, revealing a slim plaster-white face with pointed, stabbing features.

“Kill them all.”

The machines surged forward on the board, and the pirate looked back to her companions only to find that they were rushing forwards, determined and set on their targets and gritting their teeth.

She heard a clatter as Bonnie Anne bashed something with the stock of her musket, the loud pangs of Gracie’s golem and her wrench hitting reinforced metal, the deft and feathery swish of the Queen’s rapier cutting air, and then a sharp little sound as she drew blood. There was grunting, small vocalizations, little things, and wheezes, but not screaming or yelling. The crew was focused. There was no fear here any longer.

And the pirate found herself walking forward, straight into the Queen at first, the unpredictable and perfected creation. She watched the Queen twirl and jab as she approached, but she was readying her hand on her own dagger, preparing to plunge it through the machine.

She stepped next to her, but as she did the Queen turned, changed direction and began to trust the rapier forward precisely, exacting. It caught the pirate and stabbed her. She cried and howled in pain as the blood began to emerge from the deep pits the sword had made.

And then, a pipe wrench smacked upwards and collided with the Queen’s lifted sword, with such a strike it bent the thin blade backwards, crinkled it at an angle. The pirate was in mincing pain, but she reached back for her own daggers, and did as she imagined she would, cutting through first the heavy silk and satin of the dress on the Queen, then hitting and piercing metal. Then striking copper springs, then going even further, piercing another layer of metal--the backside of the machine. After making the through-and-through cut, the pirate ripped up and down, wildly, aimlessly, hoping to deconstruct the thing piece-by-piece from the outside using something as imprecise as a sword.

And as she did this, Gracie turned to cover the pirate’s back, and the golem moved in as Kane gently and regally stepped into the scene, as if to try and salvage his creation.

The golem took its mace-arm and spiked it directly into Kane’s mask. It left holes in the exterior. And then Gracie struck him from behind his head, sending him lurching forward. As the clatters of the other machines echoed around the smoothed, level floors, the rest of the crew drew in bellicose and ruthless, ready to shred apart the last remaining machine. The pirate was now kneeling and continued to wildly fling her arms about and eviscerate the Queen, teeth barred and panting.

There was a ring of sounds, of metal, of lightning, of musket powder burning, and boots stomping.

She turned around, and then, there wasn’t anything at all. Everything was collapsed where it had stood.

Gears overhead continued to whir. The delirious and exasperated crew all kneeled to the ground to catch their breath, and before them, purple threads, the same sick color of that orb from the previous floor, materialized, and pulled at Kane.

They all followed with their eyes, but no one dared reach for the automaton. Another moment of stunned puzzlement.

There was a great light, like the lighting outside, but this one was condensed, inside, coursing through Kane from his face downward. His mask popped off and fell to the floor, scraped and broken. She winced as she saw his head snapping back at a ninety-degree angle and something extracted from the mess of wires and copper lining the inside. He was so limp, so lifeless, so...real. And just like that, after the shockwave had course through him, after the machine, the true Machine had done its work and gotten what it desired, it tossed him to the floor like a discarded toy with a satisfied thump that was heavier and sharper than anything organic. Like something that ran out of batteries.

He lay on the floor in the same, crumpled, grotesque way that his father did two floors below. All around them, things stopped turning, the flat faces of the spokes of the gears shuddering to stop.

And behind where the plaster mask used to be, she could see clearly now that the teeth of all the brass gears had finally stopped their whirring.

[impalementation]

"Here it comes. Rewind that. Let's see that again." -Spike, 2.06 Halloween

buffy season two imagery series: voyeurism, part 1 (part 2, part 3)

[commentary below the cut]

It’s tricky to articulate what exactly this voyeurism imagery is doing in season two. Because I recognize that it’s a fundamentally “creepy” kind of visual language to use, and it can be hard not to feel like it’s simply being deployed against the female characters in a fetishistic way. After all, there are many voyeuristic shots of men looking at women in a covetous or malevolent way. Say, Spike’s lurking in School Hard or his amateur videography in Halloween. Or Angelus in Passion and Angel in Becoming. Or Eric taking pictures of women in Some Assembly Required, or Daryl watching Cordelia through the bleachers. It’s imagery that highlights the danger of men, but could also be read as simply appealing to men. Still, if that was all that the season was doing, there would not be so many shots of Buffy herself looking at things. Buffy in season two is equal parts the subject and the object of gazes. In Lie To Me, she watches Angel have a conversation with Drusilla. In I Only Have Eyes For You she watches people dance from the Bronze balcony, and later watches James and Grace dance through the music room window. In Killed By Death she walks through the hospital looking through windows and into other people’s rooms. In other episodes, she spies on villains as they commit misdeeds, and at the end of Becoming she stares at her friends from a distance as they wonder where she is.

In part, I think this motif exists for the same reason that it exists in season six. It’s about how fiction itself is fundamentally voyeuristic. When you consume fiction, you’re experiencing emotions by proxy, via characters who have no way to know what you’re doing. Art allows access private things, extreme things, unlikely things–things one would never get to witness in real life. To create or consume art means to invade the privacy of fictional people. And perhaps, by extension, to plumb one’s own private emotional depths.

There’s also this idea that you can’t experience emotions via fiction and also participate in those emotions. You can read a love story as many times as you like, but you’ll never be a participant in that love story. There is an insuperable distance between you and fictional events, by virtue of the fact that they are fictional. And this echoes the way that yearning for an ideal can make it impossible to live in reality. If you want life to be a story it will always disappoint you, because too much about life is outside of your control. Moreover, trying to control people like an author controls their characters would be completely unethical (see: Willow, the Trio, Ted, Angelus). It’s the idea that you can want something perfect until the earth falls into the sea, but the moment you try to have something perfect—“perfect happiness” perhaps—it will disappear. Because perfect only exists in the imagination.

So the season is about that tension. The tension between wanting and having, and observation and participation—especially when it comes to romance. And voyeurism highlights that tension by differentiating between the roles of observer and participant. But one of the things I like best about the voyeurism motif is that what it means to be an observer or participant is constantly changing. When Buffy watches Angel and Drusilla talk in Lie To Me, you become aware of how outside of Angel’s life she is. How little she really knows of him. It parallels the way that Ford watches vampire movies, but knows nothing of what it actually means to be one. When Kendra observes Buffy and Angel in What’s My Line, it’s a similar case of a character not knowing the full story of what they’re looking at. Whereas Angelus is the idea of weaponized voyeurism—the idea that it’s easy and sadistically fun to inflict pain when you don’t have to participate in that pain. The idea of observation not as a matter of lacking information, but of scary detachment. This is contrasted with Angel’s fear of participation (of “being someone”) in Becoming. His hidden observation of Buffy in Becoming highlights the way that he is on the outside her life, and life in general, instead of being someone who “helps”.

(So to connect to season six again, the Trio are voyeurs partly because they’re malevolent men like Angelus, but also because they’re nerds. They’re irresponsible and cheat at life, and watch Buffy do her thing instead of doing anything that matters themselves. They’re detached. Both in the Angelus sense of “not caring what happens to people”, and in the Angel sense of “not participating in life.” Which is what makes them such great dark mirror for the other characters that season, as Willow struggles with the consequences of manipulation and irresponsibility, or Buffy struggles to fully participate in her own life. This choice to have the Trio act as mirrors, instead of simply antagonists, is what makes season six an update on season two, instead of just a rehash. In season six, the protagonists run the risk of falling prey to the same flaws that were previously associated with villains, instead of just being victimized by them. And that’s the conflict of the season.)

Then the back half of season two is about Buffy being pushed to the outside of her life, but this time with full knowledge of what she’s losing. When Buffy watches James and Grace dance in I Only Have Eyes For You, she knows exactly what it’s like to be in love, and cannot have it (there is something to say about how Buffy and Angel get to literally participate in another person’s love story, and how this breaks the rules of the participation/observation divide the same way that Grace forgiving James breaks the rules of how their story always goes). By the end of Becoming, Buffy cannot even participate in the basics of her life: her family, her friendships, her education. She is forced into the role of the observer, to watch her friends from a distance like Angelus watched them in Passion. And in light of the entire season, we know exactly how tragic that is.