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opossumisst · 5 years ago

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Redemption AU Chapter 1: Fateful Encounter

finally trying to write my Troy redemption AU stuff featuring my OC Azriel heyyoooo pls be gentle its my second time writing A Thing

* dialogue in [brackets] are in Eridian “ A-Are you sure dad’s okay with us going this far, T-Ty?” Troy huffed as he tried to keep up with his sister’s pace. “Course he is! Besides, if we see anything scary, I can just carry you and we’ll run back home!” Tyreen slowed down, allowing her twin to catch up. She flexed a cheeky bicep at Troy, reassuring him that she’d be able to run while having him on her back. The DeLeon twins were out exploring the vast lands of Nekrotafeyo. By 8 years old, Tyreen had already learnt to leech the force out of small nekrobugs and plants, so they wouldn’t go hungry so easily in places they haven’t been. It was also easy to make their way back home from the trail of husked plants left behind during their explorations. “You think we’d find some Eridians today, Troy?” Tyreen pondered with a skip in her step, curious as to what they would discover during their journey on that day. “But mom said the Eridians d-disa-disp… they’re gone-” “Who cares what mom thinks! She’s...not here anymore either.” Tyreen stopped skipping. Troy glanced away, remorseful that he even brought mom up. “Let’s just… Try to see what we can find this time, yeah?” She quickly changed the subject, the chirp in her voice returning.as they continue their trek through the flora.

-- It was a rest day for one Azriel Titana Kha’va. The young Eridian princess had no lessons for the day, and was left sitting by her balcony gazing at the sky, something she found herself doing more often the older she grew. The kingdom was lovely, but quaint. Visiting the same places grew boring; she was longing to see what was outside the walls that kept everything out of the last remaining Eridian faction in Nekrotafeyo. The elders warned her of unknown dangers that loomed beyond; but all she ever saw was the beautiful turquoise auroras that painted the lavender sky that seemed to lead her to a trail she wondered where it ended, the fauna that roamed the open grasslands and the mountains shrouded by the Nekrotafeyan fog. She was living in the lap of royalty, but every day felt like the same. She wanted to experience something different. She wanted to experience the greener grass on the other side.

Her daydreaming was interrupted by the sound of her pet Nekrobug rattling the cage. It was behaving more eratically than usual. “[Tifaya?! What is wrong with you today!]” Az exclaimed as she rushed over to the cage, but before she could reach over and secure the lock, the Nekrobug had burst out, zooming past her and out of the balcony. Az watched as her beloved pet raced into the turquoise tracks in the sky. She wasn’t going to let Tifaya just fly off like that. Thinking on her feet, she grabbed a bunch of linen from her room and tied them to form a makeshift rope, long enough for her to climb down the balcony of her room and out of the castle premises. She was young but Eridians developed much quicker physically and intellectually than their Human counterparts. Trying not to alert the guards, she snuck past the back entrances and the gates when she had the opportunity, thankful that she was still small in stature compared to the giants that the adults of her species grew up to be. The escape eventually was a success, save for accidentally knocking a pot over and causing a mess in the corridor. A clearly calculated distraction, of course. Stepping foot outside the kingdom for the first time, Az laid her eyes on the new horizon, and continued her pursuit for her winged companion. -- “I’m hungry…” Troy mumbled, placing his hand over his stomach as it grumbled. They had been walking for almost an hour and he was growing weaker without sustenance. Tyreen had only been able to leech tiny bugs; her powers weren’t strong enough to absorb bigger organisms that had resided in the jungle they’d just wandered out of. “I’ll find something soon Troy… I promise.” Tyreen quickly reassured her brother. If only they hadn’t travelled so far away from dad. She was growing a little concerned that she’d never be able to find any food and no one would come to their aid… ..Until a slightly bigger than average Nekrobug flew past the twins. A spark of determination lit in Tyreen. It was a big enough animal to provide food for both her and her brother and she was going to hunt it down. “T-Ty wait up!” Troy was struggling to catch up to his sister, who was running around in circles trying to catch the Nekrobug fluttering around her, seemingly taunting the small children for not being able to capture it. “Almost…. caught .. y-” Tyreen’s gaze was too focused in the sky where the Nekrobug was flying around to notice her surroundings. Instead of lunging at the insect she had collided into something else.

Some-one else. Az emerged from the bushes only to be pounced on by what she thought was a small animal. She instinctively swatted away, causing Tyreen to scream in retaliation. “What gives!-'' Ty yelled, but paused as she saw the figure towering in front of her. Ethereal ash grey skin with lavender bioluminescent markings coursing through her limbs in a symmetrical fashion, covered in garb that resembled the ancient humanoid statues in the ruins she and her brother had seen around the vault where they resided. Electric purple eyes that seemed to glow through choppy white hair that fell to her shoulders. Whatever this being was, she wasn’t human. Ty heard the weird alien kid mumble something in a foreign language, albeit with a disgruntled tone, followed by a low, ominous growling behind her. “T-Ty… You’re too fast-” Troy heaved as he trudged towards his twin just in time as the noise grew closer. Az raised her finger to her lips to hush the twins. She took on a more defensive stance, ready for what was about to appear.. ...a Mantakore burrowed out of the ground behind the twins, growling viciously and reared its bladed appendages. Why weren’t they doing anything? Az stared at the twins who were slowly inching away in fear as soon as they noticed the creature, not wanting to make any sudden movements. Why weren’t they summoning weapons or trying to fight back? Impatient, she took things into her own hands. “ [GET DOWN!] '' Az roared, diverting the attention of the Mantakore towards her, and the twins confused briefly by the unfamiliarity of the words she spoke in. She charged towards the beast, pushing the twins out to safety as she digistructed a basic pole from the glowing circles of her palms -- A natural ability for Eridians was to be able to materialize objects from their hands -- swinging it at the Mantakore and swiftly evading its hits. She had never fought such a beast, but she had read enough about it from her tutors to know its weak points and attacks. Mantakores were slow and easy to avoid, or so she thought. She was too focused trying to parry its limbs; she hadn’t noticed its elongated bladed tail striking, nicking her in the arm. Az yelped in pain as she jumped back before pouncing once more in retaliation, this time aiming to strike the pole straight into the beast’s mouth as it opened it to let out a roar. The Mantakore fell to its belly, legs sprawled on the ground too weak to get back up.

She hadn’t killed it; she wasn’t sure if she could. Mustering up the courage she hesitantly positioned the pole near it’s brain, ready to slam down and end the creature’s life- “Wait!” Tyreen interrupted her as she walked over towards the dying Mantakore. She had been at the side tending to Troy after they were both suddenly pushed aside by Az to protect them from the beast, and had suffered a pretty bad graze to his knees.

Az stood aside as Tyreen took her spot, placing her palm on top of the beast’s head, where her pole would have struck. That’s when she noticed the smaller girl’s arm; the blue markings she originally thought were a mere fur patterning of the species she assumed the twins to be started to glow as her hand touched the surface, seemingly disintegrating the creature in front of her. She could only stand in place and stare in awe as Tyreen finished the job. Tyreen walked back to her brother, who had been sitting at the same spot, leaning against a rock. Az observed that he looked paler and thinner than her sister, and tried to follow Tyreen to him, only to be blocked off by her. Noticing the fragile state Troy was in she felt bad for shoving the two out of the way so aggressively. “Don’t. Come any closer.” Tyreen shielded Troy from Az, clearly cautious of letting a stranger near her vulnerable brother. Bending down, she grabbed his wrist and his markings started to glow as well; this time a crimson red. “[I’m sorry]” Az mumbled. Troy sat up.

“Was that…. Eridian?” His eyes lit up. “ [We are human.]” Leda had taught him a little bit of Eridian; it was his favourite thing to learn while he was confined to his bed on his sickest days. “H….Human?” Az gasped. She knew minimal English, but she knew that was the language most Humans spoke. “Damnit.. I’m all out of energy, Troy. Sorry.” Tyreen cut their conversation, glow fading from both the twins’ arms as she stood back up, slightly dizzy from the energy transfer. It was enough to heal the scrape on Troy’s knee, but not enough to get him back up to his feet again. “Energy…I give” Az fumbled around hoping the twins could understand her, and proceeded to carefully approach Troy, assuring the twins that she wasn’t going to harm either of them. “B-but you’re injured too-” Troy pointed out at the cut on her arm, blood trailing down. However, she seemed to ignore his remark and wanted to tend to him instead. She reached out her right hand, only to be met with awkward silence. “Uh…” Troy attempted to break the tension. He was missing his right arm all the way to the shoulder, and in its place was a worn out leather bracer strapped to his chest. Az quickly corrected her gesture with slight embarrassment and instead placed cupped Troy’s only hand in both of hers; a warm sensation started flowing into Troy’s arm as Az’s markings glowed white. He felt energy surge back into him. She was a tree of life, offering her fruit to the starving animal.

#my art #my writing #troy calypso #tyreen calypso #oc:Azriel #borderlands 3 #au #redemption au #borderlands #bl3 #canon divergent au #art #writing #fanfic #alternate universe #calypso twins

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oosteven-universe · 3 years ago

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Vinyl #04

Vinyl #04 Image Comics/12-Gauge Production 2021 Witten by Doug Wagner Illustrated by Daniel Hilyard Coloured by Dave Stewart Lettered by Ed Dukeshire Walter can’t remember who he is, and without him, this serial killer rescue mission is doomed. In other “sunflower death cult news,” the Beast and Mother are loose, Guy and Vic brawl against a frenzy of Sunflower Girls, and Rennie has run off to make clothing from human flesh. Not going to lie, I'm kind of pissed now. While I’m sure we knew at some point there might be collateral damage but really now this is going a bit overboard and my favourite little characters to boot. At this rate there had best not be one survivor of this book well except for Agent Ruiz she can survive this. Dennis is proving to be a big ole pain in the arse and not worthy of all this mess if you ask me. Still that I’m in such a right state about all this means that Doug’s writing of this tale is massively on point and has done a lovely job of getting me involved and engaged in this book in ways I wasn’t expecting to be. Now that we’re in the Halloween season this could’ve been a little more gory but i’ll accept it as is heh. I am such a huge fan of the way that this is being told. The story & plot development that we see through how the sequence of events unfold as well as how the reader learns information is presented perfectly. The character development which is phenomenal thanks to the dialogue, the character interaction as well as how we see them act and react to the situations and circumstances which they encounter fleshes them out beautifully. I’m loving every single moment of seeing these personalities be brought to the forefront. The pacing is excellent and as it takes us through the pages revealing more of the story we’re not only caught off guard but it’s full of shock and awe. How we see this being structured and how the layers within the story continue to emerge, grow, evolve and strengthen is magnificently rendered. I love how the layers open up these different avenues to be explored and those that are and those that won’t be all add this great depth, dimension and complexity to the story. How we see everything working together to create the story’s ebb & flow as well as how it moves the story forward is magnificently achieved. I really do like the interiors though I wouldn’t mind seeing more gore and viscera but hey it’s all good for those who may be squeamish to enjoy this as well. The linework is clean, crisp and strong and how we see the varying weights and techniques being utilised to create the detail within the work that we see throughout the book is superbly rendered. We see a fair amount of backgrounds being utilised much to my delight and they certainly enhance and expand the moments as well as bring this great sense of space to us. They also work well within the composition of the panels to bring out the depth perception, sense of size and scope as well as how we see the overall sense of size and scope to the story. The utilisation of the page layouts and how we see the angles and perspective in the panels show a remarkably talented eye for storytelling. The various hues and tones within the colours being utilised to create the shading, highlights and shadow work show an exceptional eye for how colour works and how to maximise its effects. I am absolutely crazy about this book. I mean from the looks of things this is going to be a one and done limited series and while I understand why that is it still makes me sad because these characters have found a place within me I didn’t know I had room for. There’s still two more issues to go so I'm looking forward to seeing how this ultimately plays out. But with such good, solid, strong writing and phenomenal characterisation and these classic comic style interiors really make this something extraordinary.

#Comic Books #Comics Reviews #Image Comics #12-Gauge Productions

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astudyinsarcasm9 · 5 years ago

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Steven Universe The Movie - Review - a confused mess - SPOILERS!

I’m still thinking about the movie and I still can’t properly say why I didn’t wholeheartedly like it. It’s complicated.

On one hand I liked the animation, I loved Spinel and I loved seeing the uncorrupted gems roaming around Beach City but that was about it.

I understand the tone this series has and where it has positioned itself and knowing that of course I knew how the movie would end, pace itself and handle its characters but it was still rather disappointing.

But let’s start things off.

What did I like?

Spinel - her animation, design, voice and song, the only song I liked, apart from the song Pearl sang when she was reset.

The concept of the Rejuvenator - I think it’s brilliant. Considering that we long thought of gems as being like computers it makes sense that you could reset them to their factory settings. Though this does create some plot-holes I will address later.

I loved how Spinel was not up for the whole talk it out and sing approach. refreshing. Though she did sing but on her own terms.

Loved the little homeworld bit but it does raise questions.

The fact that they addressed the plot point of PD wanting a colony and waiting for it. Even though it was mentioned in passing.

The Pearl lore we got. How they re basically an OS when they are made.

Pearl sing-explaining.

Pearl obessing over Greg. HILARIOUS. BUT ALSO like a lot of implications for her relationship with PD.

And that was about it. I guess.

What I didn’t like or understood

The Diamonds going from antagonists to obsessing over Steven and being those annoying relatives. I. mean the concept is hilarious and I love it but when you consider what the Diamonds did and who they are it gets unsettling.

How the hell does Spinel know what a son is? Im pretty sure she wasn’t filled on the whole Rose/PD stuff unless Steven told the whooole story in that one transmission at the beginning of the movie. And even so it took the diamonds a whole while to understand the concept of a child and a parent. Apart from WD which is still unexplained.

Where did Spinel get an injector? We can infer the whole plot takes place over the span of a day or so. How did a gem who used to be basically a Pearl get access to an injector?

For that matter, why and how is this injector different than the injector we knew of? One pops in gems in the earth’s crust and the other just up and destroys the planet?

Why did Amethyst behave that way once reset? I mean in ”Now we’re only falling apart”, we saw first hand how the other Amethyst were emerging, full fledged and self-aware and able to talk. And ok she was overcooked but overcooked doesn’t mean talking like a parrot. Does it? We received no indication prior to this that that was the case. If anything we knew gems just popped out already knowing who and what they were supposed to be.

I’m getting real tired of the whole Garnet is true love, when she isn’t. I love her, I do but she became her fusion and Ruby and Sapphire are neglected as a result. Even in Change your mind when they are in their gems as a result of being poofed by YD, Steven doesn’t call for them but for Garnet. Way to go Steven. Ok, Sapphire saved Ruby this time and they are meant to be together but what they are displaying is love at first sight and codependency ( as WD put it) .

Steven really seemed like a jackass in this when interacting with Spinel. He didn’t care for her, didn’t care for her feelings. He wanted her to go back to normal just so she can remove the injector and when she called him out on that he said that yeah that was kinda it. She was just in the way. When she was nice and hanging around Steven never showed her anything but annoyance. I think maybe once or twice he softened to her but that was it.He was more focused on bringing back his friends (legitimately so but still.)

The fusion between Greg and Steven is...Look I know it’s an anime reference but it was so uncomfortable to watch. Idk why.

Connie being useless throughout, appearing very little. despite her being awesome.

Bismuth, Peridot and Lapis being only comic relief and not contributing much to anything. Aside from Peridot who spoke about the injector a bit.

Lars only briefly seen.

The off-colors only having cameos here and there.

And finally the fact that a fascist dictatorship was just dismantled and put aside without it having any consequence whatsoever. People just weren’t affected by it. Yellow just did away with her army and her colonies.

It’s just...I understand the message SU is talking about, I understand it is this pacifist and friendly show. But like...I really felt like the movie was talking down to me, like you would talk down to a kid who you think doesn’t understand stuff.

Especially in the dialogue Steven has with the diamonds. Where they tell him their good deeds of the week. How they dismantled their armies, talk nice to lower life form and refrain from shattering gems.

It’s like if someone wanted to scold Stalin over what he did and made him pinky promise he’d change nce his policies.

Maybe I’m being too harsh but there’s one thing to promote non-violence and a pacifist approach to conflicts and it is another thing to just apply that to every possible situation ever. It just doesn’t work. Dictators don’t turn nice over night just cus you’re related to them.

Also, the end felt bittersweet. The Diamonds took Spinel not because they cared or whatever but because she used to be Pink’s and she reminds them of Pink and they have a spare room. And they are going to pour out all their issues on Spinel and make her fill a role instead of caring for her for who she is.

Bonus: how tf is Spinel able to rotate her gem like that? I thought Diamonds could cus diamond powers but some rando gem?

P.S. Doesn’t Little Homeworld feel a bit creepy to any of you?

Like, I get they miss their home but all they’ve ever known ever since their creation was the genocidal dictatorship of the Diamonds. Why would you want any part of that close to you again? Much less live in it? I would’ve understood if, I don’t know those were homeworld gems who lived all their lives there and wanted a piece from there despite being such an awful place.

But all those gems on Earth were, er...corrupted gems by the very regime they had back home. All of those gems thought a war with their Homeworld. Why would they want that on Earth?

Btw, are Yellow and Blue Pearl still slaves? Cus sure they looked happier but they were still serving the diamonds.

#su movie #su spoilers #steven universe movie #su critical #garnet #amethyst #pearl #bismuth #lapis #peridot #spinel #pink diamond

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toast-the-unknowing · 5 years ago

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hey Toast! i love all your fics and your writing a lot - it always strikes the perfect balance between humorous and insightful and sweet and it's never boring. i've been having trouble finishing anything i write lately - especially when it comes to linking one scene to another in a way that's compelling and keeps to that narrative/not disjointed. idk whether that's just a lack of motivation or what but i was wondering whether you have any tips in that regard or re: pacing?

I don't think lack of motivation is usually a writer's problem, or at least, I think when that is a writer's problem they are probably aware of it. Is the script in your head "I don't want to write this" or "I want to write this but can't"? Because if you don't want to write a story, the solution is pretty obvious; I think it's much more common that the motivation is there but something is countering it.

Often for me it's fear. That people won't like the story, that I won't be able to make the story be what I want it to be, that maybe it says something about me if people don't like it or if I can't make it be what I wanted it to be. That fear is much more likely to strike near the end of a story than near the beginning, so it is specifically a “trouble finishing stories” issue.

Sometimes it's a problem with clarity. I can lose sight of a story as I get into it. Particularly near the end of the story, because I've written all the bits that are easy already, so now I'm drilling down into the hard parts, or the parts where I don't really have a good idea of what's supposed to go there, and in addition to being hard work it means I've zoomed way in on this one part of the story, which isn't even the part that made me want to write the story in the first place. Writing might become a huge drag because some part of me knows that the story has gotten muddled up along the way, that there's something missing or something that needs to change, and it's tugging on my sleeve trying to make me turn around and notice it. Or maybe there isn't anything wrong in the story, but I've gotten so caught up in these little details that I'm thinking of the story as this one problem area instead of the story that I wanted to write in the first place.

But whether it's fear or my internal editor or tunnel vision, the motivation of "I want to write this" is usually enough to overcome that. (Not always, and my ratio of stories I start to stories I finish is abysmal, but these days the ones that get abandoned are usually ones where I go "I don't actually want to write this, or not enough to put in the work it requires.") I just need to REMEMBER that I want to write it. What were the things about the story that made me excited about it, before I ever wrote a word? What are some of the things that I wrote along the line that I didn't expect that were wonderful surprises? What's something that I would be sad to realize I could never show someone, if I never finished the story? That can really help me find my motivation. It can also help me spot story problems if I have them -- reminding myself of the concept, the theme, the shape, the emotional beats I wanted to hit, that can help me spot things in my story that aren't serving it.

Also, just, sometimes I'm not feeling a particular story at a particular time. Sometimes my brain is in "generate idea" mode and not "finish and polish a story" mode. I have about two dozen works in progress so if I think that's what’s happening I just bounce over to a different one. I acknowledge this system wouldn't work for everyone but it does work for me and could work for someone else.

As for linking scenes and pacing, this is going to sound very flippant but I do not mean it that way, but sometimes the secret is just to end the scene and start the next one. You will mess up your pacing so much more by trying to force a link, or by writing past the end of the scene, than you will by just cutting from one thing to the next.

Scene changes make us think about our plot (”okay, just finished thing G, time for thing H”), but it helps to look at the tone, as well. If you have a very happy cute fluffy scene, and then a sad angsty scene, I can see why you want to build a bridge between them. If you couldn't think of what events should be happening to get you there, at least now you know the emotional slope you’re on. Do you want your scene to build energy and suspense, with more characters coming in or more dialogue or more events happening? Or do you want things to be slowing down and getting more quiet, maybe lingering on the scene after one or more of the characters has left. Or, if you do have a big shift in mood between scenes, acknowledge the characters' reality and anticipate your audience's reaction. Maybe the sad thing that happens is more devastating because they were just happy. Maybe the fact that the characters are laughing in this scene when the last scene was awful makes them feel surprised, or guilty, or hopeful.

It is super helpful to ask yourself "what do my characters feel right now" and "how would my characters react to the thing that JUST NOW JUST HAPPENED." (I feel like I extol the virtues of improv a lot when I talk about writing, but this is something that improv has helped me develop.) I get caught up sometimes in what a story NEEDS a character to be thinking or feeling at a certain point in time and ignoring where the scene actually IS. Then I have a hard time connecting two bits of dialogue that structurally only need a couple of sentences to fit together and yet...somehow...I cannot...write those two sentences. That usually means there’s a disconnect like "hey this character was just talking about something really personal and serious, would the person they're talking to really be making jokes/talking about their own problems a second later?" That's a problem within a scene rather than between them, but maybe two scenes feel disjointed because a character's emotions have changed in between them, without an obvious reason for the change and without the audience getting to see a non-obvious reason.

Sometimes you flat out know that you need something to go in between two beats -- for the pacing, for the emotional logic, to fill in a plot hole -- but you still don't know what actually HAPPENS in that scene. One thing that helps me there is to walk through the logistics of a character's life. If I really have no idea what should happen, I ask, what would the characters be doing right after this scene, or right before the next one -- going to class? eating lunch? visiting their family?

This is the kind of detail that I will HAPPILY throw out the window if it gets in the way of the story I want to tell, by the way. I'm not going to not write a really great moment because "well but wouldn't the character probably still be at work" whatever, don't care. And I'm not going to write a scene that doesn't need to be in the story just to satisfy that logic. But if I'm stuck that can be a source of inspiration.

Another good inspiration for when I know something's missing but don't know how to fill it in: think theme. What is the story ABOUT? Is there an event or action or bit of dialogue that would bring that in? What's the thing that made me go I WANT TO WRITE THIS! How can I channel that specific motivation into this scene? If the thing I was most excited about was one specific emotional beat or mental image, what is something that would resonate with that?

But also: you are allowed to write short scenes! You are allowed to write a montage of scenes! You are allowed to cut between things without it being "compelling," you are allowed to have invisible scene changes where the audience doesn't really think much of anything about the fact that the scene just changed, and arguably you should have more of those than otherwise! Even if you just cut between scenes abruptly so that you can finish the story -- hell, once it's done you can go back and look at those, maybe with a complete story in front of you, you can see a little clearer, remember your motivation a little better, and then the words will come out easier. But really if you've got that thing that makes your story your story -- a theme, an arc, one really cool moment that you're building up to, a character dynamic, a sense of humor, a mood, a trope, whatever was that thing you really wanted to play with and build on and show people -- if you've got that thing and you hold onto it, I don't think you need to worry about your story being disjointed.

#writing #Anonymous

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comicteaparty · 5 years ago

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June 8th-June 14th, 2020 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from June 8th, 2020 to June 14th, 2020. The chat focused on Devil Tongue by Samuel Soto-Saines and Lucas Soto.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Devil Tongue by Samuel Soto-Saines and Lucas Soto~! (https://deviltonguecomic.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace until June 14th, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Discussions are freeform, but we do offer discussion prompts in the pins for those who’d like to have them. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic! Whether you finish the comic or can only read a few pages, everyone is welcome to join and chat with us!

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 1

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic?

2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)?

3. Who is your favorite character?

4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most?

5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it!

6. What is a theme you like that the comic explores?

7. What do you like about the comic’s story or overall related content?

8. Overall, what do you think the comic’s strengths are?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

mariah (rainy day dreams)

1. I really appreciated how this comic felt really authentically shonen manga right off the bat without feeling tropey or overwrought. 2. I liked when the protagonists confront the ghost in the theater. I just really enjoyed the ghosts dialogue and dramatic jestures. 3. Moira is my fav so far. She's got a sword and seems capable, though is also still an apprentice so I'm looking forward to seeing how she grows.

boogeymadam

1, ALL THE CATS!! :D but more seriously, the way the characters are introduced through their job, and yet their personalities still shine through~ 2, i liked the scene when they're leaving the Lemaire house and walking on a dark misty neighborhood street at night. It's so atmospheric and perfect for their discussion on what kind of ghost their target might be, as well as what kinda threats it may pose :0 3, I can't decide, they're all interesting. Leera was introduced last but I like her enthusiasm! 2, Moira and Leera during the scene where Moira is explaining tinctures to Leera. Moira's so goal oriented and focused while messing with some apprently-very-dangerous stuff and Leera's just trying to avoid boredom. Moira seemed patient of Leera (for the most part) and willing to explain stuff, which was cool. It made me smile. 5, Oh Man, a lot!! The lines are so very clean and precise, every characters' silhouttes is distinct. It's hard to pick which page is my favorite, but I'd have to say https://deviltonguecomic.com/comic/chapter-01-page-32/ because of all the dynamic angles and expressions on the characters. 6, Pupils taking over from the mentor. I like how Emery is allowing his pupil, Moira, to prove herself, and she seems extremely eager to do so and also: good at it! I can only imagine what Emery is like at this job :0 8, A fun and classic premise of paranormal investigators, of a sort, but with magic of their own, making it even more interesting. It's easy to root for the protagonists and feel curious about what got them into this business, or what they were like before they reached this level of fame and skill. And also, there are talking cats!! Huge draw!

mariah (rainy day dreams)

I agree with your #6 Boogey. I do really like how Emery is like "I'm just here to mentor, this is Moira's job." I like seeing the apprentice really get to take point on the mission. I did see though on the cast page that Emery's magic type is just "?????" which definitely makes me what to see him throw down some magic now XD very curious what it is

boogeymadam

OHHH i hadn't spotted that! a secret, how exciting :0c

copperine (Lady Changeling)

I'm not familiar with this one, but I'm intrigued now (and should stop reading this channel till I've read the comic...)

I'll read in the morning and try to give some thoughts

RebelVampire

What I like about the beginning is the character development. Cause we get a lot of it and find out things like Emery being an ex-magician, his relationship with Moira, etc. Yet, at the same time, the plot is not sacrificed and the story is still moved along smoothly, which is a great balancing act. My favorite moment in the comic so far is actually all the times Emery feigns that he doesn't care but then we get those shots of him peeking and spying. I find those adorable but just also really nice character moments. My favorite character at the moment is Emery. I like aloof characters and he fits that bill. I also like his general cynicism about life. Emery is the sort of character who I'd have as a friend in real life. XD As for characters interacting the most, probably Leera and a combo of Emery and Moira. Leera has pretty different motivations for being there, is somewhat opposite in personality from the main pair, and just all around adds an interesting dynamic too the group that kind of makes certain elements of the story seem more grounded. I really just in general love the comic's linework. Not only is everything super clean (making the action easy to follow), but it really knows how to bulk up the shadows to create specific atmospheres that really work for each panel and add so much to each scene.

In terms of themes, I like that the comic somewhat explores with Emery the concept of what to do with your life after your previous life fails. I think we all kind of like to believe we'll do X forever and X comes to define us in a lot of ways. But then suddenly X might not be there and it's like, what is life now? How do I deal with life? And with Emery, I do think we get to kind of experience one path that kind of takes. What I like about the comic's overall content is the...strange mix of fantasy and realism. I can't really put it into words. Like this is definitely a fantasy story, yet there's elements of realism thrown in I wouldn't expect. Like things are almost scarily normal in some respects like the houses or journalism, etc. So everything about the world really intrigues me since it feels super unique in tone. Finally, for strengths, I'm referring back to the art here. I think the atmosphere the art adds to each scene really helps give the comic that extra oomph.

Erin Ptah (BICP | Leif & Thorn)

Everyone's covered all the stuff I like about the characters, so let me just throw in some extra praise for the backgrounds. Those elaborate buildings! That towering opera-house interior! That one sequence with light streaming through elegantly-patterned windows!

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 2

9. What do you think Emery did that caused him to be exiled by the Magician Order? How does this factor into his general cynicism and bitterness? Also, do you think Emery will ever be a magician again?

11. Besides following Emery and Moira around, what role do you think Leera will have in the story? How might Leera’s presence hurt or help the duo on each case? Also, how will Leera change as she experiences things firsthand?

12. How do you think Moira and Emery will resolve the haunted opera house situation? Can the kidnapped girl be saved, or is she truly gone forever? Additionally, what other sorts of cases do you expect to see after this one?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

RebelVampire

Honestly, I get the impression that Emery was good but also just a rebellious rule breaker type. So he probably got exiled for just not fitting in with the club regardless of anything else he might have done. Which to me would explain the cynicism cause it would show him how much of life is just a popularity contest. As for being a magician again, maybe, but the bigger question is would he want to? My current theory for Moira was that she's just ill-suited to the order. I'm sure she's heard awful things about it from Emery, so why join team lame when you can join Emery and be on team winner. As for how Moira will grow, I think she'll just learn to take things a bit more seriously and mature (though probably still pretty happy and excited). I've talked about Leera a bit already, but I think her major role in the story is the grounding element and reader's eyes. Cause someone needs to ask questions for the readers, and I think that will be Leera. But in terms of plot, I also think Leera will just help them get more work by spreading their name to lands far and wide. I think in terms of how Leera will change, I think mostly she'll maybe find better things to publish about and the power she wields with words. I think the kidnapped girl can be saved, but that it needs to be done quickly. As for how this will ultimately resolve, I assume epic battle followed by emotional ghost revelations. As for other sorts of cases, I actually am expecting lots of drama ones with heavy emotional reveals from side characters. I could be wrong, but that feels like the route the comic is going. O_O

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 3

13. What are you most looking forward to seeing in regards to the comic?

14. Any final words of encouragement for the comic?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

Ryccomics

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic? Very good dynamic introduction between Moira and Emery. Very quickly and effectively I understood Emery is an older cynic, and Moira is the energetic and out to prove herself. 2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)? The magic reveal of what the potions/chemicals do is fun. I do not really understand how they work at this time, and I don’t really need to. 3. Who is your favorite character? Mauretta, she’s a lot of fun in design, and she gets to talk more than usual character type. I’m not sure what this character type would be called, but I’m going with person who starts the Scooby Doo mystery. 4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most? Moira and Emery have good chemistry. Having the young rookie be more powerful than the experienced partners adds to the dynamic. 5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it!

So much going on in this panel. All 5 characters are doing something. 6. What is a theme you like that the comic explores? I don’t have an answer yet, because how this encounter goes will shape the narrative, everyone could die. It could be resolved peacefully, it could wrap like a monster of the week story, or lead to bigger things. 7. What do you like about the comic’s story or overall related content? I like the map in FAQ area of site is cool. Gives information for those who want it, but can be safely ignored by those that don’t. 8. Overall, what do you think the comic’s strengths are? I like your line art, a lot. The silhouettes read really well. And when working in black and white having distinct shapes is so important, you’ve color code your characters. 9. What do you think Emery did that caused him to be exiled by the Magician Order? How does this factor into his general cynicism and bitterness? Also, do you think Emery will ever be a magician again? I know from the Cast FAQ, he broke their laws, in what contest will tell a lot about Emery and the Order. I am a little unclear what the Magicians are at this points, how powerful they are in this society. Are the Magicians outside of the Magician’s order?

10. How do you think Moira became Emery’s apprentice despite Emery being an ex-magician? Similarly, why do you think Moira hasn’t joined up with the Magician Order? As the story develops, how do you think Moira will grow and change as a magician? I think Moira will have to confront what caused Emery’s cynicism. I expect she will get more powerful as the story begins. 11. Besides following Emery and Moira around, what role do you think Leera will have in the story? How might Leera’s presence hurt or help the duo on each case? Also, how will Leera change as she experiences things firsthand? I Leera’s role will be mainly to ensure the characters get back onto the plot. Most stories have some form of this function, whether it is the Greek gods, a ticking clock to motivate the characters to act right now Given she works for a newspaper, she can prod the characters to do news worthy things. 12. How do you think Moira and Emery will resolve the haunted opera house situation? Can the kidnapped girl be saved, or is she truly gone forever? Additionally, what other sorts of cases do you expect to see after this one? I feel it will have a happy ending, monster defeated girl saved. This is because the character dynamics would change really drastically if Moira had to confront extreme darkness so early, she would get cynical. 13. What are you most looking forward to seeing in regards to the comic? Will be interesting to see how the combat functions with regard to group dynamics, are the other characters going to plan a part in the combat, or are they on the sidelines. 14. Any final words of encouragement for the comic? I was sad when it ended.

RebelVampire

I am looking forward to finding out more about Emery and what Emery is capable of despite the circumstances. As for final words, this is just a lovely comic with tons of unique aspects about it that I really like.

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Devil Tongue this week! Please also give a special thank you to Samuel Soto-Saines and Lucas Soto for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Devil Tongue, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: https://deviltonguecomic.com/

Devil Tongue’s Story: https://deviltonguecomic.com/store/

Samuel’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/sainezart

Lucas’ Twitter: https://twitter.com/lucaswordcraft

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #book club #bookclub #webcomic bookclub #webcomic book club #comic tea party #ctp #devil tongue #samuel soto-saines #lucas soto

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thebibliosphere · 7 years ago

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as an editor and writer, do you think the "no flashbacks ever" unofficial writing law is accurate or flawed? or does it depend on the editor/writers involved? is there a way to get away with doing them that isn't dreadful?

I think saying something can never be done is in the same snobbish vein as people who say “prologues and epilogues are dead!” like excuse the entire fuck out of you, but who died and made you king of the slushpile.

I’ve seen some truly awful flashback/prologue/epilogues in my time, but just because some authors fail to find a way to use them correctly, doesn’t mean the rest of us need to suffer from the restrictions of their ineptitude. A good editor will tell you if something isn’t working, or if there’s a better way to do it. A bad one will tell you you ought never to do something simply because it’s currently out of fashion.

As for how to do it well? I dare say if I sat down and tried it I could think of ways to do it, but the main questions to ask yourself are: does this add to my narrative in a way I could not otherwise achieve? Do flashbacks and visions work well within the world I have created? Is there another way I could relay this exposition in a way that is more effective? Does it feel convoluted and heavy when I do it? Does it slow the narrative down? Do I want to slow the narrative down? What effect am I trying to achieve by doing so?

If say, I were writing a fast paced contemporary piece, I would not use the above writing tools in my narrative. Now, an epic fantasy sci fi where the lines of reality are blurred and I can get away with heavier world building exposition? Sign Me The Fuck Up.

Prologues and the like are very good for creating a sense of oration, like you are being sat down and read to from a text long since forgotten to the passages of time by an old man with a snowy white beard and the zeal of madness in his eyes. But, in the hands of a different author, it could also be used to give the narrative equivalent of an introductory handshake. This is my world, this is the narrative tone we’re going for, bathroom is down the hall on your left, bedrooms to the right, and yes, sorry about the mess on the carpet. The cat’s just been sick.

Flashbacks, dreams and other forms of internal and external analepsis (that’s injecting backstory to you and me, internal being central to the character experiencing it, external referring to the world they are in) can perform a similar role. It can either serve to break up or cement the narrative as the author desires. Breaking it up may create a sense of instability or fragility pertaining to the internal state of your main character.

Or, like the pensieve in Harry Potter, (which I didn’t see a lot of people bitching about the same way they do “flashbacks” even though it’s a literal vessel for retaining and reliving memories, making me believe that most people bitching about certain things don’t actually know what the fuck they’re complaining about. The time turner on the other hand was handled like a piece of shit, but that’s another argument for later.) it can be used creatively to give the author more narrative freedom to introduce their main character(s) to elements of exposition in their world, that otherwise they wouldn’t get to experience, and would perhaps, need to spend several pages of conversational dialogue imparting. So what would have been worse in that instance? Fourteen pages of dialogue telling you the story, or a quick hop skip and a jump down memory lane that lets the author show it to you?

It’s almost as though sometimes, not using valid narrative tools….could be worse…

At that’s what it is, at the end of the day. It’s a narrative tool and one worth having in your toolkit, even if you never foresee yourself using it. Like that miniature blowtorch you picked up at Home Depot that one time on an impulse buy cause it was on sale. You only went in for a hammer and nails but it was there and while the higher reasoning part of your monkey brain is telling you it was a waste of money and you’ll never use it, not with all the other tools you have, there’s another smaller, more ancient part of you, grinning in the darkness. Because it knows. It knows that what no matter others might say, fire is indeed sometimes the solution. How you use it however is up to you.

You can either burn down the village by doing it poorly, or, you can figure out how it works and how best to contain it to better fuel your purposes. And if you decide you prefer to do it another way, great, fantastic, we are glad you found your way. But it’s just exactly that, your way. So I guess to answer your question a little more briefly than I have up until now:

Said is not dead, there is no one correct way to write. Anyone that claims otherwise is, in all kindness and honesty, talking out their arse.

#sasskarian

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pekorosu · 6 years ago

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ep 10

- aww they removed "otankonasu" :x

- watching ash swinging with his chains suddenly makes me want a gymnast!ash au lol

- is it just me, or did the escape + weapons room scene go by a little too fast? like it was sort of lacking in wow factor? idk, i'm gonna do a comparison with the manga during my rewatch later lol

- whoa is that a new scene? the one where ash killed the dude who kidnapped them back at dawson's place

- i feel like there’s no sense of urgency in ash's movements? his movements are slower here. i get that it’s probably bc he’s being cautious and checking out the rooms but he's like, constantly running and yelling in the manga... it really set the mood, y’know? not so much here...

- the part when he meets up with eiji and yells about shorter was some great voice acting though

- the "are you scared of me?" scene... argh... it felt so underwhelming. i felt like it was really memorable in the manga, the panels and all:

- small thing but eiji says “okashikunacchimau” here instead of “kurucchimau” in the manga. wonder why they changed it... is there a difference in nuance or smth?

- ARHGHGHGHGHGHGHG another memorable scene messed up. i get that it's a lot more economical to animate it this way but man. MAN. we no longer have this gay declaration being yelled overdramatically out of the window of a moving car ... lies down on the floor sadly

- i mean, i don’t mind if they make changes, in fact i’m more than happy to see their own take on scenes. but it has to match the original in terms of impact, y’know? for some reason, i’m just not feeling the same level of wow in these scenes ):

- the scene with shorter's body and abraham is painful as expected, but it would've benefited from more of a pause tbh. it went by WAY too quickly. they should’ve lingered to let the gravity of the ash’s feelings sink in properly.

- this episode has very glaring pacing problems tbh... like i think this is the first ep so far that i actually feel disappointed by? maybe i had my expectations set too high, esp for key scenes... also i’ll be doing a rewatch so i might edit this later...

ETA second watch:

- they didn’t let my son curse ;_;

- also rip mention of shorter's awful cooking ):

- ash calls yut-lung kisama twice here and that's just... gone in the anime but i guess his anger is clear in his tone lol

- the pacing in ash/yut-lung scene was actually alright. the end of their convo needed a pause though lol. the speed at which the scenes change is rly wild

- golzine has impeccable taste in hotels

- ash doesn’t kick any glass cases and i think that’s actually a good thing considering that glass would probably be reinforced and it might be unrealistic for him to break it with a single kick lol

- oh i get why this part feels so different: 1) ash doesn't stop to make comments, explain stuff or yell as much in the anime, 2) ash also isn’t shown to be shooting as much here. it looks busier in the manga. they’ve also removed max and ibe’s escape scenes. i’m enjoying the bgm though heh.

- oh wow for once he actually looks p gangster here

- sing's weapon is different, huh? it has a blade attached now...

- hmmm okay i think they did the ash busting out eiji scene right. the beats felt good there.

- ash's little line about the rolls royce being his "hearse" is gone!!!

- yeah i kinda wish they lingered on ash being wrecked over shorter a little longer. the scene changed too quickly.

- ending scene with sing and yut-lung was alright. it seems that the strongest scenes are the ones with lotsa dialogue.

- overall impression:

i’m still not entirely satisfied but i’ll live lol

#banana fish liveblogging #edited with rewatch impressions

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agentnico · 7 years ago

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Mute (2018) Review

Duncan Jones...what happened??

Plot: A mute bartender goes up against his city's gangsters in an effort to find out what happened to his missing partner.

Straight of the bat, Mute is not really a good film. It’s very much a mess, with a weak overly convoluted plot with disjointed pacing, and ironically for a film that’s called Mute it doesn’t have much to say for itself. But you can see that director Duncan Jones very much cares for this material and really made an effort in making this picture, as the amount of potential ideas that this film gives shows the passion present behind the scenes. That being said, there is no escaping the fact that this film is boring. I try to give all the films I watch a chance by going in with an open mind, but I was extremely bored whilst watching this film. There was no interesting McGuffin or anything that would have made the whole thing engaging enough. Doesn’t help that the screenplay itself is very hollow, and the dialogue is mostly ‘meh’.

From a technical aspect, this film is strong in all fairness to it. The visuals are gorgeous, and the music score accompanied what was on screen really well, though it is not a score that I would want to buy and listen separately in my free time on my vinyl. That being said, even though the visuals are nice to look at, the world Duncan Jones creates is basically a rip-off of Blade Runner, minus a couple of details. And I do remember Jones mentioning in an interview that this passion project of his was inspired by Blade Runner, however there is such thing as inspiration and then actually blatantly straight up copying. The latter being the case here.

The performances are all mediocre. No one was particularly bad, but minus Paul Rudd, no one’s really memorable. Paul Rudd actually had enough energy and enthusiasm that every time he was on-screen the general dull tone of the film managed to actually become a bit more enjoyable, yet every time her left the film went back to its boring ways. Alexander Skarsgard is fine as our mute hero, yet for someone who’s role relies more on expression that dialogue I felt that there was room for him to go even further with his character.

Mute is made to be in the same universe as one of Duncan Jones’ other films Moon and though I haven’t seen Moon, the connection in this film to that movie feels very forced and pointless. Basically, slight spoiler, Sam Rockwell’s character from Moon is seen during a news report on TV which Skarsgard’s character is watching, and that is basically it. It doesn’t add anything to the actual plot of the film and literally just feels like Duncan Jones wanted to say “hey look, remember that time when I made good movies??”. Then again, I haven’t seen Moon, so maybe there is a higher meaning to it, but it really seemed like...well...to be honest I just need to go and watch Moon, apparently its supposed to be good and all. The same cannot be said about Mute though, which is sadly another disappointment for Netflix, and even though you can see that Duncan Jones really tried to make something special, doesn’t mean that the final product is anything good. It’s not anything awful, but it ain’t good either.

Overall score: 4/10

TOP MOVIE QUOTE: “Just give me a bonca fucka-fookin’-fuckin’ coffee would you?”

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kaiunkaiku · 7 years ago

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Would you fucking look at that, it’s an actual fic! I have been working on this for so ridiculously long and I’m so happy I finally managed to finish it! Hope you like some Hunter x Hunter because that’s literally one of my favorite series ever.

Warnings include my dialogue writing bc we have already concluded that I absolutely suck at that, illness, more hurt than comfort for the most part, disgustingly tooth-rotting last few paragraphs and some shipping because I’m literal trash.

This is set a few years into the future from canon so they are not twelve years old anymore. Let’s say late teens.

Killua stares at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He can’t believe this, just can't, this isn't supposed to happen. He’s a trained assassin, immune to most poisons in the world and able to withstand most of the torture methods known to man. He can work with broken bones and pierced limbs, hell, he can do his job with his arm hanging from his shoulder by little more than a strip of skin (very unpleasant and painful, yes, but he can complete a job). He hasn't been sick since he was two years old.

Now, though, there's a flush on his pale cheeks, and this isn't the type he has when Gon tells him he’s cute or that he wants to introduce him to Ging. This is the kind that has his head swimming full of cotton and eyelids drooping. His stomach is in knots and it’s three in the morning and Gon is sleeping behind the wall to his right in the large double bed. His throat feels funny and his neck feels like he’s been sleeping in a wrong position for hours and hours straight, unmoving, but he hasn't, he hasn't slept all night and it honestly scares him. He’s not used to this, and this is not exciting unfamiliar like the hunter exam was, no, this is his own weapon of a body doing something it isn’t supposed to do and he’s terrified. He’s considered waking Gon up, too, but it’s better if even one of them gets a decent amount of sleep.

The only reason he’s not completely panicking is because he’s seen this - sick people - before. He doesn’t remember any of his family members ever being ill, but he can easily enough recall Leorio standing by Kurapika’s bedside after the whole Phantom Troupe thing in Yorknew City. He remembers the shadows under brown eyes, sheen of sweat on pale skin and Leorio carefully setting a damp cloth onto his forehead.

Killua is exhausted. He stares at his reflection in the mirror and it stares back, eyes glassy and the lack of color on his face matching his hair even better than usually. Under his eyes there are dark circles that blend into the flush on his cheeks.

He looks so much less miserable than he feels.

It takes him a second to realize that his vision is starting to distort. It takes him another second to react, and by then it’s too late - his knees buckle under him and black spots cloud his eyes. The barely-there effort he puts into remaining upright doesn't pay off and he crashes onto the floor, unable to control his fall like he’s used to. His head hits something and the black spots get stars to keep them company for a moment. There's pain, nothing he can't handle but pain regardless, and then footsteps hurrying to the bathroom. Gon’s bare feet against the tiled floor sound louder than they probably are and there’s a weird echo to his voice as he shouts Killua’s name. Warm hands - always warm, Gon is always warm - lift him from his sprawled position on the floor so that his head in resting in Gon’s lap.

Gon’s voice is rambling are-you-okays and what-happeneds and why-didn’t-you-tell-mes at a rapid pace, barely giving Killua enough time to process the questions. The second he manages to make out what he was asked Gon is already going with the next, and Killua’s head feels lead-heavy and feather-light at the same time and he doesn’t want to do this. He squeezes his eyes shut against the bright lights of the bathroom.

Killua feels a hand on his forehead and realizes that the rambling has stopped. He forces his eyes open and finds himself staring right at Gon’s. His hair is a mess and there’s an awfully worried look in his eyes. For a second Killua thinks Gon looks surprisingly alert, but he shakes the thought almost immediately - it would be ridiculous for either of them look sleepy three seconds after a surprise wake-up call.

“Killua, you have a fever,” Gon tells him, as if he hadn’t already come to that conclusion. “Why didn’t you wake me up? How long have you been sick?” There’s a demanding tone to his voice, the kind there is when Gon needs to know instead of just wanting. A little more panicking and it would sound exactly like his demand for Kite’s whereabouts all that time ago.

Killua opens his mouth to answer but only air comes out. It quickly turns into awful, dry coughs, every breath triggering a few new ones and his chest burns. It takes Gon barely a second to turn him on his side, hand resting on his upper back. His throat and chest are both on fire and the whole thing feels to just go on and on and on until he can finally draw a decent breath again. Gon is rubbing his back behind his lungs.

“‘m not supposed to be sick,” Killua rasps, voice rough and barely audible. Gon tilts his head and blinks in confusion.

“What do you mean not supposed to? People get sick all the time, Killua!” Gon’s brows furrow like he’s trying to think about something. Killua props himself on his elbow to get even a little bit off the floor so he can look at Gon better.

“Gon, I haven’t been sick since I was a toddler. I’m immune to basically everything.” His arm is trembling under him, bad, like his legs were when he first recognized Illumi at the hunter exam. He hates it. He’s afraid. He wants it to stop, all of it, from the fuzzy feeling in his head to the pain in his neck and the sudden lack of physical control, he wants it all to just stop and go away. Taking a deep breath, Killua closes his eyes against the spinning world and lowers himself back to the floor. He doesn't crash-land, thank heavens.

And now Gon is scared, too, great fucking job, Killua, he thinks to himself as Gon’s suddenly tightened voice asks him if he got hurt in the fight they had yesterday against these three guys and a kid, a frigging child. Killua is so done with children on the battlefield. He’s been there himself and it sucks.

It takes Killua a second to come up with a reason for Gon to be asking that, because getting injured shouldn't have anything to do with his current condition, until he remembers the shocked look on one guy's face after he got his ankle pierced by some kind of a needle-weapon-thing. At the time he’d thought it could have been because of a mistake in the location of the hit, but now he's starting to realize; he didn't die immediately. The logical conclusion is that the needle was laced with some kind of a deadly poison, but somehow it’s still affecting him.

Lethargically, Killua lifts his leg so that Gon can take a look at his bandaged ankle. He’s tired and there’s a vague feeling of his insides burning and his muscles hurt like they used to when he was six and making his way up the Heavens Arena and it’s absolutely ridiculous how he’s remembering things like this right now.

Gon unwraps his foot gently like only he can, careful not to hurt him. It's clear he’s worried, but he keeps his hands steady as the bandages fall to the tiled floor.

Killua knows he cleaned the wound thoroughly. He's a professional and he knows how to take care of his physical health. Now, though, from what he can see, the area around it looks swollen and red. It doesn't hurt - in fact, he can barely feel the whole foot. Killua wonders when that happened, since he's pretty sure he could still feel it when he came to the bathroom earlier.

All the numbness disappears, however, the second Gon takes a poke at the tissue near the wound itself. His touch is painful, like freezing fire, burning ice, and Killua chokes back a scream. His body jerks and he instinctively tries to pull his foot back from Gon’s grip, away from the pain. A voice at the back of his skull is telling him that he's endured much, much worse in the hands of his family but it doesn't seem to matter. Gon’s hands are strong, thankfully, and used to holding flailing limbs in place thanks to his experience with injured animals. It's not something Killua likes to think of himself as, but it's not like his brain is allowing him to think of anything else, either.

Gon hushes him quietly, keen eyes still observing the obvious infection as his other hand reaches for Killua’s. He squeezes his fingers, offering reassurance, but it does very little to actually help. Killua tries to squeeze back, but even his fingers won’t move on command as they should. He’s cold, colder than he should and Gon is wearing just as little clothing as he is and it’s pretty clear Gon isn’t cold. Not fair, Killua thinks. His ankle hurts.

Gon looks at the injury from all sides, twisting Killua’s ankle as gently as he can, until he finally sets the foot down.

“Killua, let’s get you back to bed, yeah? I’m gonna go call Leorio real quick,” Gon tells as he gathers Killua up from the floor. Killua is trying his best to stand up, is trying his best to remain upright and even take a few steps, but he ends up being practically carried by Gon as his knees refuse to support him. He’s cold, but the blankets feel suffocating and he still feels overall a lot worse than he can remember ever feeling.

Every second seems to make him feel exponentially worse than before. He can hear blood rushing in his ears in a deafening volume and the churning of his insides is getting worse and he’s still getting colder, which probably means that his fever is still rising. Gon is on the phone with Leorio, his tone frantic and worried and his words incomprehensible through the noise in Killua’s head.

Before he knows it, there's a hand shaking his shoulder. He doesn't know when that happened, because he’s sure Gon was just talking on the phone. Large, brown eyes stare into blue, worried.

“Leorio said he’s coming over right now,” Gon tells, words spilling out of his mouth rapidly, almost like he’s afraid Killua will slip away before he manages to finish his sentence. And maybe his fear isn't irrational, at least not completely, because Killua can feel his consciousness fading in and out, and out seems to be winning.

“He’s just a few towns over,” Gon continues, trying to push some reassurance into his voice, “and he said Kurapika is driving, so they’ll be here in no time.” If the reassurance is for Killua or himself, that Gon isn't certain of. Maybe both, maybe neither, perhaps just the other. It is there, though, and that's what Killua clings to, the attempted shred of hope Gon seems to have in this thing ending up okay.

Gon climbs to the bed and gets behind Killua, pressing his face into soft whiteness as his arms wrap around Killua’s torso.

“You're shivering,” he whispers into Killua’s hair. He pulls Killua’s body closer, shivering back against strong chest, as Killua nods shakily.

“Cold,” he whispers. Killua lets his eyes flutter shut - his eyelids feel heavy, or maybe it's his lashes that are pulling them down. He feels like he's freezing, but Gon’s touch is like fire against his skin. He thinks he can hear his own breathing. He's not quite sure, though, since if anything, the blood rushing through his veins sounds even louder than before.

Gon’s hand moves to his forehead, and for a moment Killua can feel Gon’s arms tensing.

“Killua, you're burning up,” Gon tells. “Even worse than before.” He pulls Killua closer, like he’s trying to protect him from something, or someone.

Gon slides his hand into Killua’s hair before promptly getting up, almost jumping off the bed. The sudden absence of warmth makes Killua shiver, but mostly it just makes his head heavier than it already was, sends his vision into a spinning motion and throws him off balance even lying down. He grits his teeth to prevent them from clattering and curls up. He doesn’t have the energy to search for a blanket, even though he knows there are two of them in the bed. His fingers feel icy against his biceps.

He’s slipping again, he knows that, but keeping his eyes open and mind focused on something requires energy his brain isn’t willing to produce. Killua nearly misses the fact that Gon has appeared next to him again.

“We need to get your fever down, Killua,” Gon whispers, hand reaching for Killua’s hair. “So you’re gonna take a bath before Leorio and Kurapika get here, yeah?”

The following moments are, in Killua’s head, nothing but haze and coldness. There’s a series of events starting from somehow getting out of bed, then he's suddenly freezing even worse than before, ice cold water surrounding him even though it’s actually probably lukewarm, a soft towel, Gon yelling, familiar voices. Everything goes by fast, throws his thoughts into a whirlwind of confusion and exhaustion and general haze of not being able to distinguish what’s happening around him.

At some point, he finally passes out.

When he comes to, an indefinite amount of indefinite measures of time later, head throbbing and lungs fighting against breathing, there’s a pair of storm gray eyes observing him from behind a curtain of blond hair. Kurapika has a book in his hand and there are dark circles under his eyes, making Killua wonder if he’s been out for longer than a few hours. Or maybe it’s Leorio’s fault, who knows.

“Good to see you awake, Killua,” Kurapika smiles, setting his book down and standing up gracefully, as he usually does. “How are you feeling?”

Killua turns his eyes to the ceiling, taking a second to assess what his body is doing. He feels exhausted, at least that’s for sure, and it feels like there’s a heavy weight sitting on his chest. His muscles ache all over, especially, well, everywhere, and his head is pulsating along to his heartbeat.

But he isn’t burning and freezing anymore, and the world has stopped spinning even when he moves his head.

“Better,” he whispers in conclusion. Apparently, his throat is still not working. He turns his gaze back to Kurapika, who has moved to stand next to the bed. “What happened?”

Now it’s Kurapika’s turn to look away. His eyes seem to find the bathroom door, behind which Killua can faintly hear water running. He assumes it’s probably Leorio taking a shower. He briefly wonders where Gon might be.

“It appears you were poisoned,” Kurapika answers, not taking his eyes off the door. “I don’t think you would have died, but you’d be in a lot more agony if Gon hadn’t called us.” The water stops running. It takes a few moments for Leorio to emerge from the bathroom, wearing nothing but a towel around his waist. From what Killua can see, he looks quite exhausted, too.

“And I say it’s a miracle you’re still alive,” Leorio says, apparently having heard what Kurapika said. “I hate to say it, kid, but you gotta thank that screwed-up family of yours. If you weren’t immune to most poisons, you’d have died when that happened.” He points at Killua’s tightly bandaged ankle. “Thank your maker that we weren’t in another country,” Leorio finishes, and moves to press a quick kiss to Kurapika’s lips.

Killua can feel his eyelids sliding shut, heavy as if weighed down by something. He still has questions to ask, like where Gon is, what’s going to happen next, why are Kurapika and Leorio always inclined to act so disgusting around other people. But Gon, Gon isn’t here even though he was earlier, and Killua has known for a long time that Gon does stupid things and makes stupid decisions and suddenly he’s scared, terrified, that Gon has gone off to do something profoundly idiotic.

Killua forces his eyes open and tries to sit up. His arms feel like jelly and his surroundings are spinning again, but he makes it to the edge of the bed before there’s a hand on his chest, pale fingers pressing him back and a soft voice telling him that he needs to rest, asking him what’s wrong and the next second yelling for Leorio.

He tries to fight it, but he’s too exhausted to stay upright when Leorio rushes from the other end of the room to prevent him from getting up, he succumbs to his fate of lying down for the time being.

XxX

Kurapika sighs in relief when Killua settles down and doesn’t try to sit up again. His breathing is labored and sounds overall just very difficult, and there’s a new sheen of sweat on his pale face. Leorio moves back to the side of the room where he just ran from to put on a shirt - something that he didn’t quite have the time to do earlier before Killua tried, for some godforsaken reason, sit up right after nearly dying.

Not that there’s anything new in that.

“Killua,” he starts softly. “What’s wrong, aside from the obvious?” Sometimes he just doesn’t understand either of the kids.

Killua peers at him, his eyes barely open. “Gon,” he manages to mumble, or groan, or whatever. It takes Kurapika a second to realize what Killua is trying to get to, until it dawns upon him that Gon indeed is not in the room. He can understand Killua’s distress concerning the topic, though. Kurapika allows him a soft smile.

“Where he is?” he asks, still, to confirm that he really got the question. When Killua provides him with a grunt that could be taken as an affirmation, Kurapika sets his hand to Killua’s shoulder.

“Don’t worry about him, Killua. He just went for a supply run, since we didn’t have time to grab everything when we left. He should be back soon,” he reassures him. Killua seems to be okay with his explanation, because he stops fighting his exhaustion.

Killua falls asleep fast and Leorio takes over the watch, allowing Kurapika some sleep himself.

XxX

When Killua wakes up the next time, there’s sunlight filtering through the blinds. He still doesn’t know what day or time it is, but there’s definite warmth around him. He opens his eyes to see tan, muscular arms embracing him, and when he turns his head, he meets hazel eyes.

“Good morning, Killua,” Gon whispers into his ear, the smile on his face reflecting relief, and Killua allows the corner of his mouth to curl up.

#my writing #fanfiction #hunter x hunter #sickfic #poison

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esandcasg · 5 years ago

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Big A’s ranking of Star Wars films

The list that nobody asked for.

I’m not going to spend a great deal of time on this, and I haven’t seen Solo. I’m not going to include either of the Ewok films of which I’m sure I saw one in the cinema. I will include Rogue 1 as I have seen this.

10. Rise of Skywalker

Clearly the worst, because it fails on every level. And by every level I mean two principle, stand-alone levels. It’s neither a good star wars film or a good film generally. It’s awfully paced, poorly-written, exposition-heavy, constantly referencing itself and other star wars films and does nothing to develop any of the characters. There are gripes about it that really are complaints about the trilogy in general, so I can’t really level them all on this film. But it was really bad.

9. The Last Jedi

I’m almost reluctant to put this here as I’ve done a great deal of theraputic work to remove the film from my memory, and really I need to re-watch all of them to be fair. I can’t remember much about my reaction to this film other than anger. I understand the director was trying to do something different with Star Wars. But he failed to do something good. Or something coherent, even. Again, I just don’t care about the characters here. Lots of things happen but we’re left in the same place we started. The humour is completely out of sync with the tone of the films. It was just a mess.

8. Revenge of the Sith

The thing that gets me about this film is that it feels as if we get about halfway through and then George Lucas realises he’s now got to connect it to a New Hope, thinks ‘Shit’ and then tries desperately to tie everything together. And it doesn’t work. Anakin’s fall to the dark side is awfully rushed and doesn’t make sense – read the Maddox post for a succinct summary – and neither does Yoda’s lack of foresight in seeing the vast conspiracy unfolding. The dialogue is obviously bad in all three prequels, but the plotting in this one makes it worse. The Palpatine vs Yoda fight is also a massive letdown.

7. Attack of the Clones

This might have been higher on the list had I not caught a glimpse of it recently. It’s bad. The dialogue is the problem, really, although that stupid bit where Padme falls from the ship, is lying prone on the ground, then a clonetrooper comes along and goes ‘are you ok?’ and she just says ‘yep’ and gets back up; that sticks in the craw a little. Anakin is whiney and it’s difficult to either care about his torment or believe he’s going to credibly turn into Vader.

6. Rogue One

This, Phantom Menace and TFA were hard to place. Ultimately they share the same problem, but PM and TFA have a slight advantage numerically. The problem in all three is the characters.

I absolutely, resolutely and fundamentally do not give a shit about the characters in Rogue 1. Sure, Vader is there, and Tarkin and Leia. Tarkin and Leia are just fanboy inserts though, and are jarring with the use of CGI. All the main characters are all going to die, so they therefore need to be brilliantly written. And the best I can say is it’s okay. I thought it fit well into the universe but ultimately had the same problem that put me off watching Solo – I don’t care about the backstory.

No-one ever watched a New Hope and wondered about how they got the plans. I refuse to believe they did. So they’ve made a film about backstory and all that does is undermine A New Hope. I remember the bit at the end where Vader sees that ship leave with Leia and the plans on. And then in A New Hope Leia says ‘Nah mate, we’re on a diplomatic mission’. But Vader has just seen the ship leave. So why is she trying to lie to him, and why doesn’t he say ‘I know you’ve got those pissing plans on board, I just saw you take off’?

The main character is shit as well.

5. Phantom Menace

I may watch this film in full again and feel compelled to whack it down the list again. Who knows. I know the dialogue is poor. I know Jar Jar Binks is annoying. But the balance is right here, tonally, and they haven’t just filled the film with loads of Jedi stuff as became the case in the rest of the prequels and with the sequels. I still don’t think it’s good. I think it’s a bit naff. But it’s not got loads of call-backs to what happened before, Darth Maul is obviously tearing, and Neeson is good as well. I think if Lucas had handed this story to a decent writer it could have made a good film.

4. The Force Awakens

I re-read my second viewing appraisal of this mofo and as a result it’s the fourth on the list. In summary I thought it started really well and then gradually got shit. Too much exposition, some wooden acting, some inexplicable decisions, underuse of Luke, awful exchanges between Han and Leia, Han’s pointless death etc etc. I’ve said this all before. But Han and Chewie coming back in is glorious. I really don’t like Maz Kanata in any of the sequels.

3. A New Hope

We’re into what I would class as the only good Star Wars films now; the original trilogy. I have probably seen this one too many times for it to be higher on the list. Suffice it to say it is ace. I would almost have all three as a dead-heat because they all provide very different experiences. One of the best things about this one (and to a very slightly lesser extent, the other two) is the lack of trying to be a Star Wars film. But ultimately the relationship between Luke, Leia and Han is the backbone of this film. It’s a fairly conventional story for the most part but really well told within a sci-fi context. I love it.

2. Return of the Jedi

I know it gets slated for the Ewoks – who I genuinely don’t mind, and they’re certainly more rounded characters than most of those in the sequel trilogy – but this overlooks the whole journey Luke goes through which is genuinely compelling. From the conversation with Leia in the Ewok village, right through to when Vader dies, the writing is economical, emotionally impactful and really gripping. I know the Ewok-based fight is really just a bit of light-hearted silliness, and the attack on the Death Star just something else to go on at the same time, but Luke’s development in this film is brilliant. Right from the start when he comes to rescue Han you can see how he’s changed from the first film (compare this to Rey, essentially the same character, just slightly less earnest). And Yoda dying is emotionally impactful too. The ending, with the party at the village, Luke seeing the force ghosts, is perfect too.

1. Empire Strikes Back

I mean, I doubt I can add anything meaningful here. A really brave move to end the film where is did. Harrison Ford is superb as Solo. Luke’s journey is really good. And the lightsabre fight between Vader and Luke is I think the best in the series. That bit where Luke is in the corridor and all of a sudden Vader comes out fighting – Vader looks about 15 feet tall in that bit.

Fin

#Big A's film reviews

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themangaguide · 6 years ago

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To You The Immortal

After ended up analysis, I can claim that To You, The Immortal manga is an instance where without figured out by drama tale, it prospers to be a love. It's often a requirement for love to obtain any kind of fight in order for it to expand albeit it can end up being a mess. What these features do incorrect is that they ignore. Dramatization may push on a relationship yet it only operates when the presumption needs occurring. A heartfelt tale between pairs could fall short by forcing it into a management that is deeper. Unfaithful, love triangulars, household issues; all these are points that writers are tempted to squeeze in their story. To You The Immortal has none of this still takes care of to become a tale that's influential and also credible.

Due to the fact that the love is awkward I can see it take place in reality, 1 factor it does not call for play is. They possess awful time when it comes to saying points make discombobulated when something turns up and likewise very own sides that they have concerned enjoy. The love advancement is unexpected almost all of the minute yet it plays that tone on be excusable. The pacing might have been done as it might obtain unexpected once you realize that lengthy has passed when a personality discusses the number of months or years has it been following a certain event that happened.

The story doesn't dive at the story's begin as well as does not go back to cutting the supply of play possible off. Ozawa's ex-boyfriend vanishes right away which makes it simpler to move to an enthusiastic tone. Spunk takes place and we will need to ignore it and also you do not recognize why it's contributed to that stage although breakups happen. The closure isn't vital as long as you are thrilled with the present in this circumstance. There's feasible though as it might open any skeletons from the cupboard however it's not possible without harming its euphoric environment to fit it.

The Tsuyokute New Saga makes up through its dialogue. The figures can obtain introspective sometimes. Is this wonderful? Will points remain by doing this? There are existing but they really feel as though what will be alright if the pair is in the existence of one another. In relation to why are they such a couple, the story is self-explanatory. They tease each various other and do not combat but it does not upright a sour note. They match the individualities of each other so much that anything which occurs with them contributes to a circumstance. They also make sex innocent as well as cute although it never shies away from being expressed.

I look for a personal background that was good in regards to romance such as this yet because of this manga, it left it is not sought by me. They lived a life that is regular, and also are grownups. No traumatic events are used to move characterization. A personality leading a life from young people while being healthy, to provide can be possible. At handling situations that are existing the manga performs its advantages. Ozawa works or two the story deals. Since his task does not require him to relocate outdoors consequences of a NEET Oyamada hangs around. While making use of the romance the narrative interweaves both of their lives in a fashion that is refreshing.

This might be considered a love manga. Some will see it that way yet personally due to the fact that it records the life expectancy of a common adult that is regular, I do not care. Situations brought the duo however the manga never layers it. It's a degree of realism for being such a tale of love that is bizarre, as well as I applaud it. If you like romance manga after that this is for you. Give it a go currently! See you quickly, guys! You may also take a look at https://bestlightnovels.site123.me/blog/pick-up-girls-in-dungeons if you want to read/watch further.

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oosteven-universe · 3 years ago

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Nine Stones #4

Nine Stones #4 Behemoth Entertainment 2021 By Samuel Spano Allie's dreams continue and the conversations with the dark force occupying them deepen. Chris swings by only for Allie to flip the script on him and test their relationship once again. This series gets more and more bizarre with each new issue and I love it. Sure there are times I’m not entirely sure what’s going on but that’s okay because it engages my mind as I try to wrap my brain around what is happening trying to make sense of it all. It really is a beautifully crafted series and whether these dark voices are all inside Allie’s head or they really truly exist, I prefer to think of them as a metaphor but who knows I could very well be wrong, it all comes down to his family, his messed up life and expectations placed upon him. He isn’t being given the chance to be who he is and a large part of him resents this whether or not he’s admitting it even to himself. Though we do start to see some of this being called into question thanks to his feelings for Chris. Chris himself is one messed up young man, though I'm not sure how old he actually is. I doubt they are that far apart in age. Regardless, the two make quite the pair trying to figure out their lives together. I’m a huge fan of the way that this is being told. The story & plot development that we see through how the sequence of events unfold as well as how the reader learns information is presented exceptionally well. The character development that we see through the dialogue, the character interaction as well as how we see them act and react to the situations and circumstances which they encounter does a magnificent job in expanding their personalities. The pacing is excellent and as it takes us through the pages revealing more of the story the more we want to know, seriously and a lot surrounds Allie’s mood swings and his dark passenger. I’m really rather impressed with the way that we see this being structured as well as how the layers within the story continue to emerge, grow, evolve and strengthen. I’m also liking the way that these layers open up new avenues to be explored. Whether these new avenues will be explored or not they all add this great depth, dimension and complexity to the story. The way we see everything working together to create the story's ebb & flow as well as how it moves the story forward are impeccably handled. The interiors here are a great example of what computer generated art can be. Granted I would like to see more backgrounds in use because they do enhance and expand the moments, however, how we see the composition within the panels bring out the depth perception, sense of scale and the overall sense of size and scope to the story is remarkably well achieved. The utilisation of the page layouts and how we see the angles and perspective in the panels show a remarkably talented eye for storytelling. The various hues and tones within the colours being utilised to create the shading, highlights and shadow work shows a strong understanding of how colour works. I’m always impressed and in awe of someone who can write and illustrate the entire book. It certainly holds true here because the story is so involved and at times ambiguous to its true nature and yet the way we see every panel of every page exactly as Samuel intends them to be makes for some amazing reading. This love affair we see between the boys has this whole Shakespearean aspect to it in the love and tragedy we see. Damaged characters from different worlds falling in love, it doesn’t get much more romantic actually. With this amazingly complicated writing and intense and complex characterisation alongside these interiors bring to life a modern tragic love story to life.

#Comic Books #Comics Reviews #Behemoth Entertainment

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askbloomtale · 8 years ago

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Chapter 11 is up!!! This might be the end of the Ruins’ arc. Or maybe not...

For those who can’t access AO3 or just don’t want to do it, the chapter is pasted under this sexy cut!!!

Bloomtale

Chapter 11 – A sour goodbye

Athela sat on the garden’s ground, feeling defeated, tired and powerless after the last forced load. Her fingers rummaged through the red leaves next to the save point, and she squished them slightly, to which they made a crackling sound.

She didn’t even have to look; she knew for certain that another flower was now growing in her skull, fully visible next to its two other companions. And that was not even counting the ones inside her head, of course.

One of the reasons why she knew was… because of her vision. It felt strange, like having her eye covered with a sticker. A sticker she could not remove. That should’ve made her feel really anxious, because… what would happen to her eye at that rate? But no, poor Athela wasn’t even thinking about that.

She was just angry at that annoying flower. That terrifying monster who kept forcing her to dance to his tune. And if she didn’t, he would kill her. How simple, and yet how scary that was. It made her feel so powerless, she could not stand it. And she could only truly blame herself.

Why was she so weak?

Why couldn’t she be a human, like her mother?

If only she had more strength…

She lied down atop the leaves, sighing deeply. As she had some time before Toriel came to ask the inevitable, she would spend that time just… feeling miserable. Sounded like a nice plan. Lying down and feeling like garbage because of how weak she was. She was being easily toyed with by Flowey, so easily it was even insulting.

She should get stronger.

But of course, that would never happen. Even if it was out of spite, the skeleton would not give her dear killer that satisfaction. It was him, who suggested her to kill. To gain LOVE. Well, not today, flower. You can’t control me THAT much. That’s what she thought as her hand softly pet the leaves.

Athela closed her eyes and tried to calm down.

Breathe in and out, Athela. There’s no point in getting mad over something you can’t fight. It would be better if she just proceeded her journey quickly. Once out, Flowey would not follow her anymore, would he? And even if he did, Athela’s mother would definitely protect her. She was so strong. The young monster smiled as she remembered her mother’s gentle smile.

It filled her with determination.

A sudden flash of pain made her open her eyes and stand, startled. What on earth just happened? Was Flowey there again??

…

Oh, wait, she was standing near the save point. Maybe she saved unconsciously, and thus the pain. Hehehe. What a dummy she was.

…

No, wait a second.

Flowey was indeed there!!

“Howdy!” he said, with a tranquil smile. Athela shrieked and took several steps back, frightened, and Flowey seemed to like that reaction, as he smiled smugly. “Golly! That expression on your face never seems to bore me!”

“W-what do you want now?? I’m waiting for Toriel, just like you told me!” She almost yelled as she gave him an annoyed glare. Her left eye was glowing intensely due to her fear and anger, but that didn’t seem to bother the little flower at all.

“Jeez, girl! Chill~” he answered, sticking his tongue playfully as he always did when he pretended to play nice. “I was just bored of you doing nothing. I’m not going to hurt you.”

“…Don’t you have anything better to do?” She reproached, pouting. Of course she didn’t trust him. It would be way better to be meek and quiet, maybe that way he would not get angry. But of course she could not control her tongue when she was upset. Dang.

However, Flowey didn’t look bothered. Did he ever get mad? Not that Athela had ever seen him angry. Maybe it was better this way… he was already really strong with that bouncy attitude of his. She didn’t want to think how he would be like if his buttons got pushed.

No. Instead of anger, the flower just raised an eyebrow and silently looked at her, as if she had just stolen his catchphrase. But he didn’t look really annoyed. He even decided to answer the question. Because no, he didn’t have anything better to do.

“Not really. Everything else got boring already," he replied, smiling softly. Athela groaned, not really understanding.

“Can’t you leave me alone and… just go solve a puzzle?” She asked.

“I’ve already solved every puzzle." He seemed willing to answer. Athela raised an eyebrow too, and asked something else.

“Then… go mess them up?” It was not a nice proposal, but at least it was a nice second option that didn’t involve her getting killed.

“I already did that, too." Flowey laughed, with a slight sour tone. Or maybe it was his usual sarcastic tone? Athela couldn’t really tell. She just supposed Flowey wasn’t being honest with her.

“That’s impossible. The puzzles were fine when I found them." Athela suppressed a shiver at the memory of the deadly puzzles. But the feeling of grateful bliss took over once she realized she would not have to go through those anymore. What a wonderful feeling. Well, she could do them again if she totally had to, because she already knew their pattern, but that was nothing that would happen! She already saved her progress, so no going back! That made her feel really happy about herself. She smiled a bit. She gazed at the flower again, though. Carefully, since she didn’t want to lower her guard… not even for a second.

She was expecting an answer to her comment. But Flowey just stood there, quiet.

Smiling.

How eerie. Athela didn’t like him, not at all. Why would he just stay quiet like that?

Well, she didn’t want to talk to him either. The thought of them both sharing a peaceful conversation… how bizarre. That would never happen. No, the only thing they could ever have were uncomfortable silences and unnerving smiles and death threats.

They would never be friends.

It was not that strange, Athela thought. She considered herself a friendly person; she never had any friends, but she had always wanted some. Or, at least, one. One friend that would visit her, a nice friend who would tag along for a walk in the forest… She would show them her favorite spots, and they would laugh together. She had always wanted something like that, and that’s why she was willing to be as friendly as possible. If you were nice, people would like you better. That’s what her mother said. A nice smile and kind words were all that it would take to cause a nice first impression. And it would snowball from there to a nice friendship. That’s what Athela wanted.

Of course, Flowey smiled, but… Athela was certain, that was not the kind of smile her mother was referring to.

No, she didn’t like him. And she would never be friends with her killer.

A question rose to her mind. If someone kills you several times, does that make them a serial killer?

But she was digressing. That was not really something she should be thinking about, not when Flowey was right there. She should be careful, just in case he felt like throwing a pellet at her out of boredom.

“You seem so tense." Flowey laughed at her, enjoying every second of their time together. At least someone was having fun, Athela thought as she gripped her skirt nervously. The small flower kept eyeing her, seemingly interested in the flowers growing out of her eyes.

Creepy.

“…” Athela didn’t even feel like talking. She didn’t want to be there. She would prefer… to go inside. But she did not dare to move. Too bad.

“You’re pretty boring." Flowey was, indeed, starting to get bored due to her lack of dialogue or movement. “When you’re not fighting for your life, I mean. Golly! Maybe you should try and socialize a bit, instead of running away all the time~” He added that last sentence after seeing Athela’s blue orbs contract as she heard how funny she was when she was dying. Really, didn’t he realize how creepy he was?!

Luckily, the skeleton’s struggle would not last for long.

“Oh. There she comes." Flowey jerked his head up, noticing someone in the distance. Athela looked, too, and openly smiled when she saw a familiar goat silhouette approaching, with what looked like a bag of groceries.

To add in her delight, she noticed Flowey was now gone. She let out a deep, relieved sigh, and then a giggle escaped her teeth. The young skeleton almost run to her encounter, grinning widely.

“Toriel!” Athela called for her, and the goat lady looked right at her and gave her a warm smile, too.

“Greetings, my child," she hailed, also fastening her pace to quickly get to Athela.

“Greetings!” The skeleton mimicked her speech, and that made Toriel’s smile go even wider. The old lady used her free arm to gently hug the young girl, and Athela happily hugged back.

“You seem so happy to see me… and I was only gone for a short hour." Toriel pointed out, amused. Then, she pat Athela’s hair softly. She would usually not like that, but Toriel was a friend and she could touch her hair all she wanted. It felt nice.

“I missed you," she answered honestly. Of course, for Toriel it had been an hour, but for Athela, it had been a lot more. It had felt like an eternity, too, so…

“Aw, how cute!” Toriel was pleased to hear that. She let out a soft laugh. “To be honest, I also wanted to see you soon, young one. It’s not every day I have guests, you see.”

There was a sad glint in Toriel’s eyes for a fraction of a second. Athela felt bad for Toriel; she already understood that the old monster had been alone for only God knows how much time. She felt… pity. And a sense of understanding, too. She knew what loneliness felt like, of course. It was not pleasant.

At least she had her mother. She really hoped Toriel had someone who could cheer her up from time to time. She deserved to be happy for all the good things she did.

Toriel stared into Athela’s eyes for a moment… then, her smile turned into a confused grin.

“Athela? What is that? Did you take them from my room?” The old lady caressed Athela’s cheek, softly touching one of the flowers. They were really similar to those that rested in Toriel’s room, indeed. Toriel’s touch was… warm. And fluffy. She had been careful enough, so the flowers didn’t complain. But…

Oops.

She totally forgot about the flowers as soon as she saw Toriel.

Well, at least the old lady didn’t seem really alarmed, but rather confused…maybe… maybe that was her chance!!

“Uh… do you like them?” She asked, with a slightly trembling voice. She feigned to rearrange the flowers a bit, as if they were there just for show. That cost her a bit of pain, though; she had to suppress the urge to frown. Toriel raised an eyebrow, still smiling. She had not seemed to notice the girl’s apprehension.

“Well, they look rather cute. But usually, one would put flowers in their hair…Are you okay? Is this a skeleton thing?” Toriel seemed curious. Maybe it was just one way of improving their looks the youngsters had these days?

“Uh… yes! Yes it is!” She nodded, kinda desperate to cover the sad, traumatic story behind those seemingly harmless flowers. She was just blindly going with what she previously thought it would never work at all; her brain could not think of anything else to say. But…

“Interesting," she commented, still eyeing the buds. Surely she believed that lie because she wasn’t a skeleton herself. While a real skeleton would not like to have anything in their eye sockets, to other people it could look like they would not really mind. They were just two empty holes, after all. What was the big deal, you would think?

Well, for Athela it was a big deal. She still felt really uncomfortable, because her vision was getting blurrier with each reset, and also the pressure was not a nice thing to feel, either.

And just the general nerve-wracking uneasiness. She wish she could just trim them, jeeze.

The skeleton sighed with relief when she saw that Toriel just lost interest on that matter shortly after she heard her mumbling something that sounded like “I’ll ask him about it later”.

Him who? She wondered. Maybe Toriel also had a nice phone buddy. That would actually be great. Someone whom she could have a nice conversation with, every once in a while. She would’ve asked who that person was, but Toriel started speaking again, cutting the skeleton’s thoughts.

“Well, as long as you’re happy." Toriel nodded, not suspecting a thing about the lie Athela just told her, and then let go of the hug to focus her attention on the groceries once again. “Shall I start cooking? It’s almost lunch time," she announced, as she wiggled the bag and smiled again. Athela smiled too, as she remembered what Toriel made for lunch on the last timeline.

“Oh yes, snail pie!” Athela liked snail pie. It had an acquired taste, but she could easily ignore the weirdness of the flavor and just enjoy it. After all, pie was pie.

“Oh, my… how did you know?” Toriel seemed impressed at Athela’s perceptiveness. She was smiling again.

“Uh… I just… supposed you would suggest one of those?” The young skeleton hid her nervousness under a smile that, fortunately, didn’t turn out as sore as she expected. Of course, this was the same lunch time. She knew what was going to happen now, but Toriel never told her. If she didn’t want to look suspicious, she needed to tone down her enthusiasm a little bit.

“My, how perceptive you are, my child." The goat lady slowly started to walk towards the house as she spoke. She was probably hungry, and it was the same for Athela, so she followed her closely. The poor skeleton was really hungry lately. Certainly it was because of the great amount of stress certain flower insisted on giving to her. Stress usually made her hungry. And then she wanted chocolate, or another sweet treat. But snail pie was enough for now.

The two ladies entered the house; Toriel seemed to be in a good mood, as she had started to hum an unfamiliar tune. It was an interesting song, but Athela had never heard it before, so she just listened to it.

Sadly, she couldn’t really pay much attention to it. Her mind was busy thinking of what to do. She was really, really curious about the cold door, and she definitely wanted to go to the other side… it was, after all, the path she should take in order to get out of the underground. She needed to talk to Toriel about this. About… leaving.

Even if that hurt her.

Of course she didn’t want to leave Toriel alone again, but… what about her own mother? She couldn’t stop thinking about her. A few days had passed, so what if she thought her daughter was dead? What would she do? Surely, she was crying… oh no, Athela didn’t want her mom to cry. She just wanted to be with her again.

…

It had to be done.

Toriel had gone to the kitchen straight away, and was now starting to prepare the pie. Athela was just walking in circles around the living room table, thinking of what to say. She would never forgive herself if she made the gentle old lady cry again.

Again…

Stop it, Athela. There’s no use on thinking of absurd past timelines. That never happened, not anymore. Breathing in and out, trying to calm herself, she decided to enter the kitchen to talk directly with Toriel.

“Greetings, Athela." Toriel welcomed her with a warm smile. Athela smiled back, but her smile didn’t turn out entirely honest, and that worried Toriel; she placed the mix bowl on the stove and cleaned a spot on her apron before asking. “Is there something wrong?”

“Greetings…” Athela’s face was like an open book. She was nervous and felt guilty, and Toriel could see that. The old lady waited for the young one to say something, wielding a worried expression, as she always did when something went wrong. After a moment, she managed to gather the courage to talk. “I… I went to the basement…”

Toriel frowned a bit in disapproval. It was a sad frown.

“Oh… did you?” She sighed, seemingly defeated. “You shouldn’t go there. It’s drafty, you could catch a cold.”

“I’m sorry. I was just curious." And that curiosity ended up straight killing her. Well, Flowey was the one who killed her, but… she messed it up. She was partially to blame. Anyway, she wasn’t going to tell Toriel any of that.

“You… did you get to the other side?” Toriel asked. She looked sad, but also, somewhat… grateful. Maybe the fact that Athela didn’t leave made her feel better.

“No..." So Athela was right. That was the exit. Of course, Flowey killed her because he didn’t want her to get out, so figures. Nonetheless, it was nice to hear it from Toriel’s mouth. “I didn’t go outside the Ruins yet, I… I wanted to talk to you first.”

“Thank you, my child." Toriel said, sighing once more. Truly, it would’ve been too sad if she left without saying goodbye. “I… I know I must not stop you from getting out. You are right by trying to get home…" Now there was a sad expression across her face. She obviously didn’t want her to leave. “I… would’ve liked to spend some more time with you, but… I suppose it can’t be done. Still. It’s dangerous outside. You’re not… exactly strong, Athela.”

“… I know." The skeleton looked down to the tiled floor and frowned. She hated it, but there was nothing she could do about it. “Still. I need to try. I will do my best, I promise!”

“I believe you will." Toriel smiled and patted Athela’s hair softly to reassure her. “You’re really perseverant, aren’t you? And you’re not a defenseless child, after all. I believe you will make it out of here… that’s what I wish to happen.”

Toriel trusted her.

Well, that was very sweet of her. Because Athela didn’t trust herself, but… maybe all she needed was a little bit of encouragement. Just like the guy on the phone did a few days ago.

All her life, her mother had sheltered the poor girl, because she was weak, fragile. It was all so Athela could stay alive and safe, and she understood, but… She never really left her alone to do anything potentially dangerous. So… Perhaps that was all she lacked: a little bit of confidence.

“Thank you, Toriel," Athela grabbed the goat lady’s sleeve, feeling kind of emotional. She was really grateful that she could trust her. Toriel looked happy.

“It’s nothing, Athela," she replied. “But at least… can you share one last meal with me? I would go with you, but… I have to stay here.”

Athela nodded vigorously, smiling, though she stiffened up a bit when she felt the flowers moving along with the shaking. Thankfully, Toriel didn’t notice that. She was happily focused on cooking now. She would make the best snail pie she’d ever made. And, of course, Athela would help.

Eventually, the food was made, and they both went to the living room to eat it. Both ladies were really quiet, but Athela still had many questions to ask. Therefore she left her fork for a second.

“So… That door. Where does it lead to?” The young lady couldn’t stop thinking about the door. The cold door that Flowey never let her open. “It was really cold.”

“You mean, the last door? That one leads to Snowdin, my child,” Toriel replied after swallowing.

Great, new things. Athela was not sure if she liked the new place yet, but the name sounded nice. Sounded like it had snow. Maybe that’s why it was cold. It would make sense.

“What’s in there?” The skeleton wanted to ask so many things, but one question at a time would be fine for now.

“Well… Snow," Toriel chuckled. “And trees. And a lot of dogs…” Toriel seemed deep in thought. The old lady smiled widely shortly afterwards. “And, as far as I know, skeletons.”

“What? S-skeletons?” Athela’s eyes went wide open with surprise. She never expected that… of course, the underground had lots of monsters as far as she knew, therefore she would naturally encounter her own kind at some point. But… so soon? “R-really? Skeletons like me? Oh… how are they? Do you know? Will they… do you think they will like me?”

Her sheer enthusiasm and nerviness made the old lady smile. What a cute child.

“My, such eagerness," she chuckled. “I don’t think you have to worry about them. Sadly, I cannot tell you many details, as I haven’t really seen them myself. But I’m sure they will like you. You’re a really nice girl, after all.”

“T-thank you..." Athela blushed a bit with the compliment. She couldn’t handle flattery really well, oops. She ate more pie in order to calm down. It worked.

Maybe she was eating too fast… Regardless, Toriel looked at her with a sweet expression on her face. Melancholy could also be perceived there, but Athela was too busy eating to realize. Toriel sighed and also ate; she was still thinking about Athela’s departure. She didn’t want her to leave… something told her it would not end up well.

But who was her to stop a lonely girl who just wanted to go home? She would do the same, if she just could…

Memories were flowing, filling her with nostalgia. She sighed, and stared at her plate. There was some pie left, but she didn’t feel like finishing it, somehow. However, Athela kept gobbling up as if she hadn’t eaten in days. That was rather cute. Soon, all of her food was gone, only crumbles were left.

“Would you like to keep a slice? For the road." Toriel noticed how much Athela liked her cooking, surely she would like to store a bit of it for her journey.

“Oh! Of course!” Indeed, Athela loved the idea. Some extra pie, what a wonderful thing.

Toriel smiled and stood up from her chair, then nodded and walked towards the kitchen, silently. Athela remained seated and looked at the pie leftovers Toriel didn’t finish. Toriel always finished her plate…

The skeleton frowned, feeling a little bit sad. She knew it wasn’t easy, Toriel was probably unhappy about her decision to leave. But… she had to. Even if she loved Toriel very much.

She had to.

She sighed, and then stood up as well. The end was near. She would leave soon. That filled her with uncertainty; what would possibly await on the other side?

A forest? It sounded like a forest… and she loved forests. She had never seen snow before, but surely it was good. Cold climates… a new thing she was willing to see.

“I’m back. Here you go." Toriel was there again with an appetizing slice of snail pie. The more Athela ate it, the more she liked it. The skeleton smiled and saved it.

“Thanks," she said, smiling widely.

An uncomfortable silence filled the room after that.

It… was hard to say goodbye.

“I suppose… you’ll be leaving now." Toriel looked sad, but she smiled anyway. She wanted Athela to be happy, and if that meant she had to leave, so be it. Her expectations… Her loneliness… Her fear… For her, she would put them aside.

Athela looked aside and nodded.

“I… I want to go to the garden one last time," Athela needed to save. She didn’t know what was out there, it could be dangerous. Saving was a pain, but important regardless. Toriel nodded to that, and accompanied her to the patio. There, Athela looked at the big tree for a while, and then at the red leaves beneath the save point.

She was going to miss that house. And Toriel. She looked at the old lady, who gazed back into her eyes with a warm smile across her face.

Athela took a deep breath.

She was one step closer to her freedom.

That… filled her with a good feeling.

Then, the usual sharp pain came back. She didn’t even need to do anything. Maybe she was just getting so used to it, she didn’t even need to touch the glowing light. That was good… more or less. She closed her eyes strongly when she felt the soreness spread across her skull. She was also getting used to that.

She felt a pat on the head. Toriel was worrying about her again.

“I’m fine," she blurted out, to make Toriel feel better. “It’s just a headache.”

“You’ve been having some of those, lately. Are you sure you’re okay?” The worried old woman patted Athela’s hair, concerned about her well-being. Athela just nodded, smiling again. The pain was gone.

…

Progress was saved. She could finally leave now.

…

She couldn’t bring herself to say goodbye.

“I’ll lead you to the door." Toriel’s face was stern. Nobody seemed to be happy with this. Athela sighed and followed. The corridor felt even colder and smaller now. She still remembered her bad experiences with Flowey, so she stood close to Toriel the whole time. Holding her hand.

Whilst they walked together, Athela was thinking. Should she say anything? Should she… do anything? It felt so sour, leaving like that. She felt bad.

But… the door was already there. What a frustrating situation. Last time, it felt like ages to her. And now they got to the door in less than a few minutes.

Was it already over? It was just the first door, but Toriel had stopped, as if she would not go further than that point. Oh, no. She wanted to stay with her until the end…

“This is it…” Toriel whispered. “I wish you the best of luck, Athela." Her solemn expression made Athela feel sadder.

“T-Toriel, I… I’ll miss you," she said, noticing how her voice trembled a bit. Toriel looked even sadder once she heard that. She was making her best effort not to get too emotional, and yet… The old lady took a deep breath.

“If you truly wish to leave the Ruins…I will not stop you. However, when you leave… please do not come back..." Those words were really harsh. Athela’s eyes were filled with tears now. Curious thing, her right eye, the one where the flowers were, was shedding less tears than her left eye. Were the flowers obstructing the water, or were they absorbing them? She didn’t know. Regardless, Toriel kept talking as she gently placed a hand in her shoulder. “I hope you understand.”

Yes. She did understand.

She was going to leave the underground. And they would probably never meet again, wouldn’t they? That was her goal. Going back would only give her false expectations. She didn’t want that.

“I… I understand. Thanks for taking care of me." Athela tried to wipe the tears, carefully.

Toriel could not stand the skeleton’s tears. She kneeled down and pulled the girl into a big, loving hug. Athela didn’t take long to hug back. The tears were not stopping anymore; Toriel’s dress got drenched, but she didn’t seem to mind. They hugged as if it were the last time they would see each other again and then, Toriel let go. She wiped Athela’s tears away, and then kissed her forehead.

“Goodbye," she whispered, before getting up again. Athela gritted her teeth and watched her walk away.

They shared one last gaze before Toriel turned back again and disappeared into the corridor.

It was done. She wasn’t there anymore.

Athela was… alone.

She turned to the door and pushed it forcefully. The same corridor welcomed her as she walked towards the exit. Again, it felt like an infinite passageway. The echo of her footsteps resonated and brought back the oh-so-familiar dread, the fear.

She was alone.

Alone in an unknown world.

What could she do now? The urge to go back to Toriel rose up inside her with the force of a typhoon. She was so afraid of being alone. But… she should be strong. Because Toriel trusted her. She would show her faith to be genuine and worthy. She would make it out even if it was the last thing she’d do.

The last room.

And of course, there he was. Atop the grass, surrounded by the light that came from up above, a small little flower stood. Smiling. Flowey the flower.

“Clever. Verrrryyy clever." He started talking, his face showing a twisted, mischievous grin. Athela didn’t know what he meant…she was too scared to ask, anyway. She feared he would kill her yet again. She never know what to expect. “You think you’re really smart, don’t you?”

Athela shook her head. She didn’t think she was smart at all. In fact, she felt really bad at the moment, so she would appreciate it if Flowey could shut up just for once. But she said nothing. So he kept talking.

“Hee hee hee… I bet you feel really great." The flower nodded, still smiling. “You managed to get through! With tricks and lies, but hey, everything’s valid!”

“N-no, I didn’t…!” Athela jumped up at what Flowey just said. However, she abruptly stopped talking when she saw Flowey shape his face… and turn it into one that really looked like her own.

“Uh… do you like the flowers?” Even the voice he made was really like hers. It was… a new level of creepy. Athela looked horrified as the flower kept imitating her. “It’s totally a skeleton thing! It’s not like I died or anything! I don’t know anything about loads and resets! Nope, not a thing! So don’t worry and just let me go now, old hag!”

“Wait, I never said anything like that!!” She clenched her fists as she felt anger boiling up.

But Flowey just smiled.

“No?” He then regained his normal face and voice, and of course the smug grin was still there. “How curious. It totally sounded like you wanted to avoid the topic so you didn’t have to explain anything. Aren’t you being too lazy, Athela?”

Don’t say my name. I don’t like it when you say my name.

“I just… I didn’t want to worry her! She would get really sad if she knew!” She yelled, frowning. Flowey just didn’t understand. How could he understand?

“Yes, of course." Flowey flailed his head with a dramatic expression, and started imitating Athela again. “Oh, she worries too much. If I fell her the truth, she will never let me out of here. Let’s lie to her so I can get out of here faster." His expression turned more impish at the end. Athela was speechless.

“I…. I…” That felt like a punch to the chest. How did he know that she had considered Toriel would do that if she told her…? No, but she didn’t… she wouldn’t do something like that, she…

“Golly! Looks like I hit the jackpot!” Flowey was proud of himself. “I totally guessed what was going on in that little flowered head of yours, didn’t I?”

“N-no, you didn’t," she lied.

“Ah, another lie… what a misbehaving lady. What would Toriel say?” Flowey laughed. Athela took a step back. Her anger had totally disappeared, and now only guilt remained.

She… did it because she was worried. She…

“Well," Flowey continued, “now it’s lying. Maybe later, you will get even meaner. Who knows? You’re half human, after all… aren’t you?”

Athela stared at him, confused. Still unable to formulate any kind of question or… any sentence, really. She was just feeling awful, and confused, and scared, and…

“…” No, no words were coming out. Even if she tried… could she even excuse herself?

“This is going to be so very interesting..." The flower’s face then grew, showing a horrid, cruel smile. His voice sounded distorted as he laughed like a maniac, scaring Athela even more than she already was.

Then, he regained his original size and winked cutely before burrowing into the ground and disappearing from the skeleton’s sight.

And she was alone again.

Athela - LV 1 Ruins – Home Nº Resets: 27

#Bloomtale #Bloomtale AU #Chapter 11 #Main story #Ruins #Home #Athela #OC #Toriel #Flowey #A cold door #thanks for reading <3

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